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uluvjay · 3 months

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Couldn’t help falling in love- Q. Hughes

Quinn Hughes x Fem! Reader (feat. Trevor Zegras)

In which you can’t help falling for Quinn

Warnings?; Slight angst, asshole Trevor, slightly suggestive, cursing, kissing, talks of drinking, playboy Trevor?, I apologize for any errors

Prev Part

You and Quinn had left the following night while everyone was asleep, he had told his brothers of your plan but nobody else knew.

According to Jack, Trevor thought you’d gone home to New York and believed that Quinn had to make an unexpected return to Vancouver over something with his apartment.

You and Quinn spent a week in the Bahamas, long days under the sun and in the ocean while your nights were full of delicious food and long talks on the balcony of your room.

Something had shifted during that week, you weren’t sure what it was but whatever it was had you making no moves to stop him when he pressed his lips against your on the last night.

When he pulled away you were as red as a fire truck and it wasn’t from the sunburn you had, and that night you two shared a bed rather then sleeping in your own separate queen beds.

However the second you two entered the airport you felt dread fill your stomach, he held a ticket to return to Michigan while yours was for New York.

There was an admission of feelings in the middle of the airport from Quinn, he had explained that he liked you and had for a while. Yoy told him you liked him back, Quinn made you feel a warmth in your chest that you had never experienced with anyone else before, not even Trevor.

However you opened up about how you were scared about getting into something right now and he understood. So over the next couple of months you two resorted into nonstop texting that had turned into late FaceTime calls that would go on for hours.

Until finally in March you had gotten a job to decorate a home all the way in Vancouver that would need you to stay there for at least three weeks and upon hearing the news, Quinn was thrilled.

He opened his apartment to you and you spent your entire trip wrapped up with him, movie marathons, Quinn showing you around to his favorite places, dinners, ice cream, and anything else the boy could think of.

You felt confident and content with Quinn, the way he always had a strong arm wrapped around you and introduced you as ‘His Girl’ to his teammates when you attended one of him games.

The butterflies in your stomach and persistent blush on your cheeks didn’t go away once while you were in Vancouver, and you weren’t mad about it.

Over the previous months you had taken time to grow as a person, learned to love yourself and noticed that what you felt with Trevor wasn’t true love.

It was silly feelings you’d had since you were younger, you had feelings for someone that didn’t exist anymore. You had feelings for the young and silly Trevor, the one who would stay up with you for hours playing board games and snacking on candy that went against his diet.

Not the Trevor that had grown during his time in the Nhl, the still silly and witty Trevor but he’d grown cocky. He had become someone new, someone you didn’t recognize. He no longer knew your favorite things and you didn’t know his.

He’d became the poster boy that scored cool goals and worked his ass off. The pretty boy that puck bunnies and models lined up for, the boy that could care less about your achievements and feelings. The boy that disregarded your emotions and blew up on you.

What you felt with Quinn was new, fresh, your chest wasn’t filled with anxiety and worry. It was now warm and full of love, you didn’t worry when you told him you were ready for more if he was too.

That night he showed you just how ready he was, he took you to dinner at his favorite restaurant, then when you returned to his apartment he walked you to his bedroom and took off your clothes one by one.

He took care of your body in a way you never felt before, it wasn’t sex, he made love to you. He took his time and learned your body, learned the things that pulled those little whimpers from your throat, and the things that made you cry out his name loud enough for his neighbors to hear.

He woke you up the next morning with flowers and breakfast in bed, he made all your favorite breakfast foods and had gotten your favorite flowers.

After the two of you ate he had asked you to be his girlfriend, and he’d never felt such joy before when you said yes and pulled him into a deep kiss.

And now you two were gearing up for your arrival to the lake house. Sitting in the backseat of an Uber on the way to the house.

Trevor was already there along with Cole, Alex, and some of the other guys that came every year.

“Nervous?” Quinn asked softly from his spot beside you, his thumb rubbing soothingly along you legging covered thigh.

“Not really, I missed your brothers and everyone. It’s just going to be weird seeing Trevor after what happened.” You shrugged, eyes looking out the window.

“Hey” he called softly, hooking a finger under your chin and turning your head to face him. “It’ll be okay. It’s my house and if he has a problem then he can leave”

You smiled at him and whispered a small thank you and before you knew it you were pulling up to the large lake house.

Quinn got out first and made his way around to the back of the car to get your bags while you gathered up your things and took a deep breath before exiting the car.

Jack was already waiting on the porch when you two got there. There was a large smile on his face as he pulled his brother in a tight hug despite his dripping hair and soaked body, No doubt getting right out of the pool when he heard a car pull up.

He moved onto you next and an evil smirk over took his face as he watched you step back from not wanting to get wet.

“No I’ll give you a hug once you dry off.” You laughed trying to get around him and into the house, however you weren’t fast enough and he had you up in the air running outside.

You could hear Quinn laughing as he followed behind and as you made it outside the familiar hoots and hollers of Luke and his friends filled the air.

“Jack, no! Don’t do it.” You laughed as he neared the edge of the pool.

“Give me one good reason”

“If you won’t then I won’t kick your a-“ however you were cut off as your body was submerged in ice cold water.

“Jack Rowden! You asshole.” You coughed as you made it back to the top.

The boy was bent over in laughter as he clenched his stomach while your boyfriend was beside him offering you his hand with a towel in the other.

“Come on I got you.” He laughed and you took his hand allowing him to Pull you from the cold water and wrap you in a fluffy towel.

You pushed Jack in from his spot next to you, a laugh of your own bubbling from your throat as his body splashed into the water.

“Payback bitch!” You called behind you as you wrapped your arm around Quinn’s waist and made your way back into the house.

You took a fast shower in Quinn’s bathroom before returning to the room where he was unpacking your suitcases.

“Can you hand me a bathing suit and one of your shirts please.” You asked him softly.

Quinn nodded as he reached into your suitcase and grabbed the first one he saw, a dark blue one to match his jerseys.

He smirked as he remembered you ordering it a few weeks ago, “come here.” He called.

You blushed as you shuffled over to him, his large hands removing the towel you had wrapped around your body. He grabbed the bottoms and kneeled down in front of you, holding them open for you to step into them before he slid them up your smooth legs.

He picked up the flimsy top before motioning for you to spin around, he placed the cups over your breasts before securing the bottom ties, his hands slowly moving up to tie the top ones.

You shivered as you felt his warm breath against your neck, his beard prickling your skin as his lips kissed along the side of your throat.

“Your brothers and friends are downstairs.” You whimpered as his hands reached around your body, fingertips tracing along the top of your bottoms.

“I don’t care.” He shrugged.

A squeal broke from you as your body was spun around quickly and his warm lips were against yours, his hands slipping down to your thighs while yours went to tug the hairs at the back of his neck.

He kissed you deeper as he picked you up and placed you on his dresser, his teeth nipped at your lower lip before they began to trail down your body.

His lips were inches from your breast when his door swung open, and an all to familiar voice filled the room.

“Quinn my favorite broth-what the hell?” Trevor stopped in his tracks as his eyes caught you perched on Quinn’s dresser with the defenseman between your thighs.

Trevor’s eyes locked on yours and while you were sure your face was full of shock and embarrassment His eyes were dark and clouded with anger.

“What’s she doing here?” He scoffed.

“You mean what’s my girlfriend doing here? I invited her.” Quinn smirked.

“Your girlfriend?”

“Yes and I’d appreciate it if you got out, we’ll be downstairs in a moment.” Quinn smiled all too politely for the emotions that were brewing behind his eyes.

Trevor replied with a scoff before turning around and making his way out of the room, not bothering to shut the door behind him.

“He ruined the mood didn’t he?”

“Yep” you breathed looking at Quinn apologetically.

He sighed but moved back and helped you off the dresser before pulling one of his shirts over your head and guiding you downstairs.

Everyone-including Trevor were gathered in the kitchen, Some people had beers and seltzers while others had food and fruits in their hands.

“Y/n!” Cole smiled as he noticed you, pushing Trevor out of the way so he could wrap you in a hug.

“His Cole.” You smiled as you hugged the boy back.

“How’ve you been?” He asked.

“Cole we were just talking the other day.” You giggled.

“So? I haven’t physically seen you in forever.” He scoffed before giving you one more squeeze and returning to his food.

“So when did you two get together?” Trevor smirked yearning him a smack on the arm from Jack.

“When she came to visit in over March but we’ve known we wanted each other since our trip last summer.” Quinn shrugged.

“What trip?” Trevor asked confused and there were a few people that agreed with him.

“When I was gone for that week like mid June, me and Y/n went to the Bahamas.” He explained.

“Wait I thought she went home and you went to Vancouver because something happened with your place.” Trevor asked even more confused now.

“Nope, I was packing to go home when Quinn asked if I wanted to go away and I said sure.” You shrugged.

Trevor didn’t give you a reply, nor did he care to stick around. He grabbed his water bottle and made his way outside towards the backyard.

“Well this should be a fun summer.” Luke coughed causing the entire group to nod in agreement.

The following weeks were much of the same, boat rides, late nights by the fire, hook ups in the back of Quinn’s jeep, and Trevor acting like a complete ass.

Most days would be filled with snarky comments at any chance he got, and quite frankly you were getting sick of it, and you weren’t the only one.

Jack as well as Cole had said something to him multiple times about acting like a child and being petty but it never deterred the boy.

Alex had told him that he needed to be an adult and talk things out with you and see things from your side. You had left liked he asked and moved on with your life but he was still stuck on the fact that you’d gone and got with one of his good friends.

“Maybe i should just say something.” You suggested to Quinn as you could feel Trevor’s eyes on you through the sliding doors of the kitchen.

“I’m not going to tell you no because a conversation between you two is needed, however it shouldn’t be you that initiates it. It should be him.” Quinn spoke, he was also tired of how Trevor was acting but he knew that there was unresolved issues between you two.

You thought about his words for a moment and you almost agreed until you watched Jack get up and walk into the house, leaving Trevor out by the fire alone.

“Fuck it, I’m sick of him so I’ll just be the bigger person.” You sighed, sitting down the drink in your hand and taking a deep breath.

“Good luck baby, yell for me if you need me.” Quinn encouraged with a small kiss to your head.

“Thanks.” You breathed and began your way outside.

The second his eyes met your form Trevor was standing from his seat, however the sternness of your voice stopped him from moving any further.

“Sit down, we need to talk.”

“Why would I want to talk to you?” He scoffed, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Because you won’t stop being a dick and I’m tired of it. So we’re going to have a conversation as adults to figure why you’re so pissed that I’m here.” You explained.

“I’m not pissed that you’re here, I’m pissed that you’re here with him. Just a year ago you were telling Jack how you were in love with me and now you’re dating his brother?.” He spat.

“What’s it your business if Im dating him or not?.” You asked.

“Because, You said you loved me and then went off and got with him!.” He yelled.

You let his words sink in for a minute, what was he trying to say? Did he love you?

“What are you trying to say Trevor?” You asked softly.

“Nothing, just forget about it.” He shook his head.

“No don’t say it’s nothing and go quiet now, the last three weeks you’ve had a lot to say. So speak up and tell me what the hell is going on with you.” You demanded.

“I-I’m not sure okay! Seeing you with him makes my chest hurt, I get so angry when he touches you, or kisses you, hearing him call you nicknames makes my skin crawl. Seeing you be with someone like him makes me realize how badly i screwed up.” He cried.

“So I guess that’s why I’ve been so rude, I was still upset about last summer and I hoped that we could talk things out but then you showed up here, with him and I decided to let my emotions take control.” He continued, his eyes locked on yours.

“So what, you blew up on me for having feelings for you, ignored the texts I sent you for the first two days after, and then when I show up here with Quinn you all of a sudden have feelings for me or something?!” You asked, anger quickly filling your body.

“I don’t know if I have feelings for you but I’ve never felt this way after seeing you with a guy before.” He explained.

“Well now you know how it feels, now you know how shitty I felt when you invited me here just to spent half the nights with random blondes. Now you know how my heart felt when you would be all over me just to take home someone else at the end of the night.” You started.

“It fucking sucks wanting someone that will never want you Trevor, it suck’s when everyone around you gives you pity filled looks when that person is flirting with others in front of you. And now that I finally have someone that doesn’t and would never make me feel the way you have, you all of a sudden want me? Yeah no thanks.” You scoff with a shake of your head.

“Where did your feelings for me go though? They just don’t disappear over night.”

“No trevor they don’t, and it took me a long time to figure out what exactly the feelings I had for you were. I spent nights crying remembering how good things were before you went pro, how you’d make me laugh and always be there for me. But I also sobbed while remembering all the hurtful things you did that I let slide.” You shrugged, eyes filling with tears at the memory.

“What horrible things? Huh? I was always a good friend.” He scoffed.

“Like making me leave my own birthday party in freshmen year because you needed a ride back from some girls, leaving me drunk and alone on multiple occasions just so you could get lucky, leaving me at some restaurant last year because your hookup was horny and then making me cover the bill knowing I just barely had the money, and let’s not forget you making my entire graduation dinner about you.” You shot, eyes locked on his as you recounted just some of the events that he’d made you feel horrible.

“Okay..so maybe I wasn’t the greatest friend.” He shrugged.

“That’s for sure.” You scoffed, moving to take a seat in one of the chairs that circled the fire pit.

There were a few beats of silence between you two before Trevor finally took a seat beside you and spoke up.

“You really don’t feel anything for me anymore?.” He asked softly.

“I think a part of me will always love you but not in the way I love Quinn. I still see you as one of my best friends despite everything, at a point in time you knew every little thing about me and we have a lot of happy memories together but I’m not in love with you anymore.” You replied just as soft.

He smiled at you sadly, “There’s nothing I can do?”

“No Z I’m sorry, you had your chance and instead of being rational you made me leave and treated me differently. I’m sorry you’re just now realizing how you felt for me but I have someone that loves and cherishes me and I really hope you find that someone one day too.” You smiled.

He nodded as he sucked in a shaky breath before standing, “Hug?” He questioned.

You nodded before standing and wrapping your arms around his middle, his hands wrapped tightly around your shoulders.

You couldn’t lie you’d missed Trevor’s hugs, they were always nice but feeling his arms around you didn’t cause the same butterflies they used to and the thought of that made you smile.

He pulled away first his hands patting your shoulders awkwardly before he spoke up once again, “I think I need to go apologize to Quinn.”

You nodded in agreement and told him he was probably in the living room but that you’d be staying outside, you needed a moment to think everything over.

A couple minutes later you heard the doors slide open and a body block your line of sight, looking up you were meant with a smiling Quinn.

“Hi” you breathed.

“Hi honey.” He greeted before motioning you to stand up and taking your place, but pulling you onto his lap seconds later.

“Did he apologize?” You asked once you got comfortable on his lap.

“Yeah, said you made him realize some things.” He replied softly, his large hand running along your arm.

“Yeah.” You breathed leaning further into his touch.

“Wanna talk about it?” He asked politely.

“Tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow is fine by me baby.” He cooed and pulled your body tighter against his as you both watched the fire and bask in each other.

#quinn hughes x reader #quinn hughes imagine #quinn hughes #quinn hughes x you #quinn hughes x y/n #trevor zegras #nhl #trevor zegras x you #trevor zegras blurb #trevor zegras imagine #trevor zegras x reader #nhl fanfiction #nhl imagine

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salaciousdoll · 1 year

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Treat Me Like a Slut

━━ ༉⁩༊⁩ Pairings: Yuushi Totsumoto from lady k and the sick man and Toji Fushiguro from JJK x Shy!fem! Reader( crossover)

━━ ༉⁩༊⁩ Encapsulation: being shy can either lead you to a good time or bad time, you choose today

━━ ༉⁩༊⁩ Warnings: smut, double penetration in one hole, pussy eating, cunnilings, cum eating/drinking, pet names( doll, baby doll, princess, etc.), degradation and praising, competitive fuck, their personalities gonna switch on this one, oral( m/ f ), breeding kink, choking, impact play( a little), voyeurism, riding, throat fucking, squirting, talks about being shy and having anxiety( not explicit tho), two guess appearances, two dollars if y’all get it

━━ ༉⁩༊⁩ Word Count: 5.8k

18+ Fairies Allowed Only

Shyness is something every other person has had, including you. Shyness either comes from anxiety or trauma and this is all based on your perspective of it. You have been shy your entire life to the point where you couldn’t make friends properly, couldn’t even get a boyfriend without a push of a shoulder from your best friend you magically got the chance to have. Opposites attract you guessed because your best friend was the complete opposite of shy.

Enough about her, let’s talk about how because of isolation in your life can lead to shyness too, whether it’s from your mother or father being overprotective and forbidding you from making friends or going over your best friend’s house or because of what happened to you in the past—-you still don’t know how to perform full conversations with people you just met even in adult years.

So when you have two hot neighbors who are complete opposites, what do you do? They both moved in one after the other, exactly one week stretch if you’re really talking. It’s like it was planned but who knows. You watched both move in from your front window, making sure to hide yourself really well in case you get caught and have to introduce yourself prior to the time and setting you rehearsed in your head.

After they moved in, nonstop noises were heard and you hated how you couldn’t speak up— asking them both to stop. It’s been 6 months, so If their walls could talk, they would tell so many tales—nasty ones for the most part. You found out that one of the guys was named Toji and he’s to the left of your apartment building. You only found out because of the girls screaming his name in the mornings and at night, sounding like she was in love with the man. Finding out that the name to the right of you is Yuushi was hard due to you not talking to him, luckily because the man with dark shallow eyes and beautiful long black hair called out his name while passing by your apartment after coming from Toji’s apartment; you managed to get his name. You watched as Toji and another man with long black hair with his face supporting a scar followed after the first man with long black hair. You guessed they were a group of friends from what you saw.

That night was an unforgettable night, especially when they all walked past your apartment again, this time going into Toji's apartment. It was now 1:35 in the morning when nothing but the banging of Toji’s bed hitting the wall with no regards to how much his neighbors could hear was heard loud and clear. He wasn’t even the only groans and moans you could hear, there were four other moans and groans you could hear. You put your left hand on the wall his bed was hitting while your right hand held the vibrator on your dripping pussy as you tried so hard to suppress your moans.

You felt shameless and dirty yet you couldn’t help but to masturbate whenever you hear either of your neighbors fucking. Toji had multiple women coming in but Yuushi must have one girl since you never saw him with women like that— only hearing the moans he pulled out of her at night. Her as in the girl you never saw at all. She was loud at night, probably because of how hard he was fucking her. Somehow, you knew it was one girl because her voice wasn’t different every time he fucked. You expected that from Toji’s girls, not Yuushi‘s girl. You once made an assumption that maybe it was a robot he possibly built for his pent up frustrations, only scratching the thought when you overheard him speaking to the girl like she was human, a slut of a human.

“ Atta girl,, such a pretty little slut letting me and the guys take turns with your sweet little hole, where did you even find her at Toji, fuck!.”, Yuushi rasped out to the woman they managed to fuck. You wanted to be her so bad especially when you didn’t hear a reply from her, only her moans. You wanted to be fucked out of your mind, to the point where you couldn’t think and only seen mushy things clouding your mind and vision. You envied her and wanted to be in her spot, so bad. Real bad. You heard one of the men's deep voices groaning out the woman’s name, automatically making your knees buckle.

Your pretty eyes rolled to the back of your head from the images you had playing in your head from what they were doing to the woman. You wished it was you they were pulling screams from, you wished it was you they were smacking and manhandling, you wished it was you that was begging to cum, wished it was you that was being degraded and praised. You envisioned yourself as the woman and that was the push you needed as loud moans escaped from your mouth— you quickly covered your mouth, muffling your moans while your pussy gushed out clear liquid all over your porcelain wooden tiles. The good part is that you learned that your pussy could squirt, the bad part is that you didn’t notice the banging had stopped, almost like it stopped when you squirted on the floor. Nevertheless, you cleaned yourself up and carried yourself to bed, having a goodnight sleep.

The next day, you got up early to do your daily routine, which was just your hygiene treatment and you taking care of yourself like you always do. Your best friend called you throughout the day to tell you about her life and to ask you about your life, only to complain as you told her you were doing the ordinary. You couldn’t tell her that you had a fear of stepping outside of your apartment in action of running into either of those men from last night. She’ll just ask to leave early to get you out of your apartment.

It was now 7 pm in the evening when you were sitting on the couch watching your favorite television show. You couldn’t understand yourselves sometimes because you are in Japan and yet you can’t communicate with anyone. You knew some of the language they spoke, the basics so communicating the language wasn’t hard, it was communicating with people that was hard. Plus, Japan is beautiful and has many cool activities where you could meet new people, but you’re too damn shy. It’s a fucking curs— your thoughts were interrupted by the knocking of your door.

You were a little shaken up because of how erupt it was, nevertheless you had to answer the door. You rehearsed what you were going to say when you opened the door in your head while moving to the door. Hoping not to stutter or fumble words you were planning on saying. Slowly opening the door, you came face to face with the two men you were avoiding out of the four of them. Your two insatiable neighbors, Yuushi and Toji. Yuushi was leaning his shoulder on the ledge of your door while Toji was against the railing behind him with his arms folded and a smirk across his face.

You were too busy thinking that you didn’t hear what Yuushi said to you, so you snapped your eyes open and close to pull yourself back into reality, “ um, I’m sorry I didn’t catch what you said, sir.” You wanted to punch the fuck out of yourself from using sir but it’s a habit. You respected people that were older than you so you had no choice.

His deep voice vibrated from the chuckle he let out from your polite nature, “ I said my name is Yuushi, Yuushi Totsumoto and behind me is Toji Fushiguro, it’s our pleasure to be able to meet you, pretty girl.” You almost combust right then and there because he called you pretty girl. That nickname was always gonna have an imprint on you. Even if you try to deny it, it’s still gonna make your knees buckle.

They watched as you looked down to play with your bracelets aggressively prior to looking up at them while still playing with your bracelets in the habit of taming your anxiety. Toji tapped Yuushi’s shoulder when he noticed you doing that before walking on the side of him, “ Can we come inside? I mean to get to know you of course. You’re the neighbor we didn’t get to introduce ourselves to when we first moved in, so do you mind if we get to know who’s the neighbor to both of us? Hmm?”

You stared at the both of them, moving your eyes up and down, left to right taking them in. They were both wearing black joggers, just Toji had a tight fit black shirt on while Yuushi had on a black crew neck sweatshirt. You could practically see Toji chest poking out the shirt almost trying to break free for air. You suddenly looked into their eyes and caught eyesight with Toji green eyes first, later looking into Yuushi's sunken black eyes.

You timidly moved to the side, letting both men in. Closing the door, you watched as they looked around your small apartment, “ For a small apartment, you outdid yourself with the decor. Pretty just like you.” Yuushi looked back at you at the end of his sentence with intensity in his dark eyes, you ignored it since you didn’t want to be trapped in his heavy gaze.

“ Would you two like something to drink?”, You were heading to the kitchen to distract yourself from the embarrassment of saying the wrong thing. Your living room was in clear view from the kitchen so you felt their eyes roaming over you as you looked through your fridge for your options of drinks.

“ Got any beer? Corona or bud light, doesn’t really matter?”, Toji says, tapping his hand on the top of the Couch he was sitting on. Toji must’ve thought you were a woman that keeps beer stored, but your best friend hasn't visited that much— she was the one who brought the beers and stored them in the fridge for her.

You cleared your throat to fix your parched throat, “ um, I.. don’t really have any beer, I just have water and juice.”

Toji chuckled, getting up from the couch to walk in front of you, “ Ease up, doll. We don’t really want beer, I'll take water. Yo, yuushi, what do you want?”

You noticed that he never took his eyes off of yours when he asked the other man what he wanted. It was like he was daring you to break eye contact and you feared if you did, something was going to happen to you without a doubt. That’s how scary and intriguing he appeared to you. You finally managed to break eye contact when Yuushi came next to him, both now leaning against your sink while you stood in front of your open fridge, “ I’ll take a water too, darling. It’ll definitely quench the thirst I have for something or someone else right now, wouldn’t you agree?”

You so badly wanted to crawl into the fridge—closing the door just to stay there until they left, but you couldn’t and you hated it because now the tip of your ears were burning up and so was your face. You felt so much smaller than your actual build and that says everything you need to know about these men: dangerous and sexy, way too much for you to handle. You knew that and they knew that too that’s why they were enjoying teasing you, hopefully they’ll get to do it until you break and want more. After all, the goal was clear for both of them here.

You didn’t say anything, just nodded your head— almost like you were controlled to agree with him. It’s like you couldn’t find your voice or thoughts.

You turned to grab three waters— closing the refrigerator with your feet— and when you turned around, Toji was right there in your face with a beautiful smirk on his pretty face. Yuushi grabbed the water bottles out of your hands and you wanted to interrupt him to tell him about how he took your water too, granted Toji laced his hands on the side of your hips ahead of picking you up. A loud gasp in shock left your moisturized lips as your instincts caused you to wrap your arms around his neck and your legs around his slim waist. You were surprised that he picked you up despite how much you weighed, it’s like he didn’t care and you liked it.

Toji slowly brought his forehead against yours, “ Say the word and we’ll give you everything you’ve been desiring since we moved in next to you.”

Your eyes widened before hearing a laugh erupt from the side of you, “ Come on, pretty one, did you think we couldn’t hear the sound of your vibrator going every other night or the sounds of your moans, let us be your fantasy and reality just say it? Say it with the fucking confidence I know you can have or you’re not getting shit form either of us.” Yuushi was staring intensely in your eyes as he gripped your face in between his long, thick fingers.

He almost wanted to melt from how pretty your cheeks looked squished together under his touch. He wanted you to have confidence prior to them fucking the shyness away from you and he was going to get it, no matter how many nights he have to spend with you to get rid of it. He’s been wanting you ever since he saw you one time while you came home from work, that’s the only other time he and Toji saw you. When you go to and from work; the other time is when your lousy best friend comes to take you away from your pretty dungeon. His words not yours, of course.

You could feel your hands getting sweaty due to your anxiety rising, you were nervous and found it hard to speak. Both of their gazes on you weren’t helping either. So, you suddenly remembered your best friend's words about speaking up and spoke in a quiet voice, “ Please become my fantasy and reality,Yuushi and Toji.”

They smirked at you, looking over at each other after. When they looked back at you, Toji was the one to talk, “ I think that was quite clear, don’t cha’ think? She’s shy so it’s obvious she isn’t gonna speak loud, so we’re gonna have to make her loud. Isn’t that what you want, princess.”

You nodded your head, giving Toji the access to plant his soft lips on yours. Some may say you are foolish for mistaking the kiss for passion, but you couldn’t care less for right now. You liked the feeling of his lips on yours while he walked back into your room, laying you on your bed. His lips on yours felt like you were kissing a toasted marshmallow, so soft and warm . The movement of your two heads were moving in opposite directions, making the kiss deepened. Small whimpers erupted from your lips. Toji almost wanted to smile in joy at finally hearing your small little whimpers, he was glad you gave him access to your mouth even more.

Your tongue collided into each other, gliding sensually over one another in pure heat. Your saliva mixed with his tasted so good right now, maybe it was the heat of the moment; maybe it wasn’t, “ Mm Toji, I can’t wait any longer please touch me.”

Toji slid his big veiny hands down your body, sliding down any type of pajamas you had on. You helped him a little bit by lifting your body up and then kicking them off your legs whilst spreading your legs open to give him more access. You completely forgot about Yuushi until he broke you out of your kiss with Toji by snatching your face towards him, “ It’s obvious that you have a favorite here already, I was beginning to feel left out, so what are you gonna do to make it up to me princess?” You so badly wanted to hide behind your hands from the way his eyes penetrated your soul, he was almost looking at you like you were nothing but something he could squash in his hands no matter what size you were. It was so sad for you to think about how you would want him to squash you like a bug. You wanted his degrading treatment so badly and you were going to get it.

Toji chuckled while going down on his knees in front of your soaked cotton panties, you only wore lace panties when going out. Cotton panties were for the house and lace panties were for outside. He only chuckled when seeing them because he’s never fucked a woman who wore these kind of panties, only two of the women he had wore Cotten panties. The outline of your pussy was clear and known to him though. He loved every moment of it especially when he breathed in your pussy scent, leading you to try to cover your face with your hands, but Yuushi caught both of them with his own hands, “ No, you don’t get to hide behind those pretty hands of yours, pay attention to Toji while I use your pretty hands for my own pleasure, it’s the least you could do at the pre-game, yeah?”

You gasp when you feel the front of his sweatpants, feeling how hard he was. The length was the only thing you could think about and it almost made you drool if Toji wasn’t distracting you by placing kitten licks on your pussy while one of his hands pulled your panties to the side. He was glad he finally got your attention, now he can feast properly. Toji stopped his small kitten licks to your tasty pussy prior to him locking his hands around the fabric pulling them to the floor, bringing them into his sweatpants for later.

“ Fuck, baby, this pussy s’ so pretty, I could never get tired of staring at it and from the sample taste I got of this sweet little pussy, I would say I could never get tired of eating it, now pay close attention to me and only me. Take your eyes off and Yuushi is gonna be the one you’d get down here.”, Toji says, sucking the swollen clit into his mouth. Your body reaction to his sucking of your clit made the men laugh. Your legs were shaking and he hadn't even started eating your pussy like he knew he was supposed to.

Toji green eyes were captured with your pretty eyes as a ruff voice whispered in your ear, “ You better not take your eyes off him because of what you do, nothing but edging is what you’re gonna feel if I eat your pussy so fuck up if you want to, darling.” Yuushi was a man whose words weren’t taken lightly and you could tell from his body language. Your eyes were almost taken off of Toji as your head went back in pleasure at the licking Toji was doing to your pussy. His tongue was running through your folds in a zigzag direction. Your squeals and moans were heard by both of them. Oh, how they loved hearing your sweet moans running through their ear drums like a melody of their favorite songs.

You wanted to roll your eyes to the back of your head when you felt a finger into your pussy. The thickness of his finger was enough to make you want to pull all of his fingers inside of your pussy out of greediness. You were screaming in your head at the way you had to keep your eyes on your green eyed neighbor whilst he was eating your lush like it was his last day on earth. His thick tongue was so good on your sensitive pussy causing your body to lift up and down.

Yuushi clapped his hands before pulling your hands to the hand of his sweatpants, “ Atta girl keep moving your body up and down, fuck his face. He loves when they do that to him, look at how low his eyes got because of you, shame. Now show me if the theory I got in my head is wrong or right by sucking me off, you can do that can’t you? Let’s see if you even know how to suck dick. If you do then my theory is correct, if you don’t, maybe I’ll reward you for proving me wrong? Don’t worry pretty girl, you can finally take your eyes off him, I want to see your eyes on me when I fuck your face.” You wanted to scream because what the hell was his theory and you wanted to scream from Toji tongue circling around your entire pussy, and he was surprisingly delicate with his tongue.

He was so mean to you, but you loved it too much to tell him off. One of them treated you so soft while the other one treated you like you were just the gum underneath his shoe. Oh, you were so fulfilling your fantasy and desires right now. Your eyes finally looked up at Yuushi and you almost came right then and there. His look was intense and made you want to cry. Your eyes traveled down his now bare but big chest and abs. You so badly wanted to lick his six pack but that’ll be for another time you supposed.

Your body jerked when Toji stuck two fingers inside of your warm, wet pussy, “ Ahh, fuck, to-Toji right there, mmghh.” You couldn’t finish what you wanted to say because Yuushi got impatient and pulled down his pants, turning your head to put his thick cock inside of your mouth, “ tired of your fucking mouth and you’re fucking horse play, it’s annoying. Now show me what that pretty mouth of yours can do before I bruise your throat.”

You eyed his body and saw that he had a happy trail going to the base of his dick, the small bush he was growing was attractive to you too for some odd reason, or it could be you just being hungry for his dick. Nevertheless, your mouth was latched into his dick already so you just bob your head up and down. You were sure you were going to have neck cramps from the way your neck was turned. You honestly didn’t care about that right now since yuushi had his head cocked back with his mouth wide open. You could hear his faint moans and knew you were doing your job right. You moaned on his cock, probing more moans from the rough man above you. Your hand stroked the part you couldn’t fit into your mouth, your spit lapped up on the part you could fit into your mouth making you proud of your dick sucking skills. Your other hand reached down onto Toji’s hair, tugging on it, you were kinda glad that your back was laying on the bed because you were gonna have back and neck pain.

The sounds of slurping and sucking could be heard from Toji and yourself. The sounds of you sucking on Yuushi’s cock was mystic and beautiful all at the same time. Your head bopped faster and Toji’s fingers and licking moved at a quick pace too. Your moans increased making Yuushi moans increase, “ Kuh, fuck, just like that butterfly, just like that. Good, you’re good at something other than pretending to be shy. Such a pity of you acting all shy just to -ughh fuck- get us in your bed. Shit! I think I’m gonna cum down this little fuck hole of a throat. You would like that wouldn’t you, my little slut.” He stopped you from sucking his cock by pulling your hair away from him. Taking off his sweatpants and undergarments completely leaving his body naked and exposed.

Meanwhile Toji was scissoring his fingers inside of your faster while sucking on your clit. You felt liquid pour out of your pussy, you were glad you squirted instead of peeing because that’s what it feels like to you. Toji sucked up all your juices while your body thrashed around wildly. You couldn’t scream in time because Yuushi already planted his knees beside your neck, placing his hard cock into your mouth, fucking at a fast pace from the start. Your gags and moans were filling the room right along with Toji overstimulating your pussy. Your legs felt like jelly as your throat felt full.

Yuushi's moans were so loud and audible, “ That’s it, fuckkkk!! Look at you getting all teary eyed while I fuck this slut of a throat of yours. You are so loving this, well aren't you a doll? A slutty one though, can’t let you forget that my pretty little whore.” His words and the tip of his dick piercing the back of your throat, hitting the uvula like it was nothing, made your eyes roll. If you combine that with Toji placing little kisses all around your pussy while repeating the words “ good girl” or “ my pretty doll” over and over again, you definitely got yourself a win.

Your thoughts and vision were so busy that you couldn’t see Yuushi’s expression as the warm white liquid dripped down your throat. His hips buckling were so satisfying to feel along with his balls hitting your chin as many times as his hips thrusted into your mouth, “ Shit! I’m cummin’ im cummin’ baby, fuck fuck fuck! Your mouth feels so damn good.”

Once he stopped coming down your throat, he slipped his dick out of your mouth before staggering off the bed and walking over to stand next to Toji. Toji got up off the ground to stand up next to Yuushi, fist bumping with him. They eyed your form as you were breathing hard with your eyes closed. They looked at each other prior to looking back at you, Toji speaking first, “ We’re the perfect balance for her. It’s obvious, she likes praise and degradation, so let’s really give her what she wants this time.”

You opened your eyes when you felt yourself being lifted, only to get placed back down on a naked and toned Yuushi smirking at you, “ You didn’t think we were done, now did ya’?” He clicked his tongue while shaking his head, “ How condescending of you? After all, what do I expect from a slut who likes to get her throat fucked.” You gasp when he enters your wet soaking pussy without any warning. You cried out from the impact of his cock stretching you out, “ Augh! I’m not— mmm, I ca-”

You felt Toji placing small kisses on your back or back rolls as Yuushi was ducking into you at a medium pace. Toji kisses found a way to ease your pussy up and Yuushi felt you letting him inside of you even more. Toji was now holding your waist as he kissed up to your ear before whispering into it, “ Now, relax yourself princess.” You laid your body down connecting your chest to Yuushi’s making the man groan from the way your pussy fluttered around him at the contact you two were having. Toji smiled, leaning down to bite your ear, “ Have you ever taken two dicks inside of one hole before? I was planning on using your little asshole, but it seems you’re a virgin there so we’ll wait to have that.”

You couldn’t even answer what he said because Yuushi pushed his head forward to suck on your nipples, instantly causing your head to be thrown back into Toji’s bare chest. You could only guess he got naked when you were first penetrated by Yuushi’s cock. So you did the only thing you could do, shake your head to his question.

Toji smiled at the news, moving his head for him to see you, “ You look so beautiful, allow me to make you feel good and better than he can. He’s rough with you but I’ll be delicate because that’s how women like you should always be treated, right?”

You moaned out your answer earning a slap on your chest from Yuushi, he didn’t like your answer at all, “ No, women like her should be treated like the sluts they want to be treated like. Watch and learn, Toji.”

Toji chuckled before tracing his dick on the opening of your pussy where Yuushi’s dick was ducking you at, “ No, you watch and learn, can’t believe I’m the one being soft when I’m usually the one who’s rough. That just shows how barbaric you are being right now.” Toji pulled your neck back making your face tilt towards his. Your back was arched perfectly and that gave him access to enter your pussy slowly, your pussy was soaked enough to allow him inside easily and he couldn’t be any more grateful. He felt your pussy clenching and unclenching against both of them, he also felt Yuushi’s dick against his and it surpassingly didn’t matter right now since they were both inside of you.

You felt like your pussy was tearing apart but it felt too good to stop them. You felt a tongue licking your face and opened your blurry eyes to see the outline of Toji, “ you look so pretty crying, baby. So fucking pretty and your tears taste so delicious, makes me want to see you cry even more.”

“ Now who’s the rough one?”, Yuushi asked, throwing his head back against the covers on your bed in complete awe over how warm and at home your pussy felt right now. He didn’t care about Toji’s dick brushing against yours or that he was fucking without a condom for the second time, he was sure that Toji felt the same way since he was without a condom too. Was it risky? Sure. Was it great? Yes.

You didn’t feel like doing anything, yet your body moved on its own. Your bounces were matching their thursts. They both were moving faster now. Skin slaps and moans were heard all throughout the room and apartment. You were sure your downstairs neighbors heard you three fucking like rabbits.

Yuushi latched his mouth on the corner of your neck sucking harshly on it and Toji was too busy watching the way his dick was going inside of your pussy. Everything looked so perfect. He wanted you so bad and he got you. Now there’s a price for you for making him and Yuushi wait.

“ Hah, fuck, it’s hurts so good and I think I’m gon-gonna cum, please. Please. Please. Oh!!”, you moaned loudly at how well they were treating your body. Your beaten pussy felt so good right now and you needed to cum so bad.

“ Come on sweetheart, last a few more seconds for me, I wanna be able to breed this little pussy of yours, can’t let you go without a thank you, would be very rude of me, wouldn’t it? My pretty fucking girl, aah fuck! Such a good fucking girl, see how I just praised you, don’t let me down by cumming too early.”, Toji moaned against your ear while panting harshly into your ear as well.

Yuushi circled his hips into yours making his dick twist inside of you in the same motion, he was doing it on purpose in Order to get Toji to punish you for coming too early. He wanted Toji to be rough with you like he is. He was honestly surprised at his own behavior today because he was never this rough but something about you, your tainted innocence, and your shyness gets him going. He just wished he was the one that took your virginity and corrupted you first. Funny that Toji thought the same thing.

“ Fucking hell!, squeeze around me like that one more time and I’m cumming inside of this pretty little cunt of yours, gonna make you my personal whore after that. You want that, hmm doll?”, Yuushi says, grabbing your head with both of his hands. He looked into your eyes, watching you try to let out words but they were incoherent words instead. He knew you were fucked out and mind fucked right now, he could see it too from the way your eyes rolled. He honestly didn’t blame you because both him and Toji were moving fast. When Toji move inside, he moved out. Only different movements there were was from the motion of their hips going in circles or another motion.

“ You should see the determined look on her right now, Toji. It’s honestly cute of her trying not to cum even when she’s already fucked out. I wanna make her my personal cum whore.”, Yuushi says before enveloping your lips onto his mouth in a sloppy kiss.

“ How precious this perfect little Angel, wish I could’ve seen it. Ughh! Shit! Now I’m gonna cum into this pussy of ours. Holy fuck!”, Toji yells out as his head tilted back and his cum leaked into your pussy. His rough pace made him cum at the same time as you and he felt on top of the world right now.

“ aah, it feels so gooddd, M’cummin, cummin so much, mmmmgh!”, you moaned before your body went limp as your push squeezed around both of them. Your cum slipped out of your pussy and onto Yuushi dick whilst more was going inside of you. You felt too full.

Yuushi harshly bit your bottom lip, creating blood as he did three final thrust inside of your pussy letting his cum spurt inside of you. They both were being drained by your pussy and loved it. Yuushi moans were so breathy, “ Ahn, fuck yes. Best fucking slut right here. Hah, Hah, shit!” His moans were turning faint as the cum from his dick slowly stopped leaking.

They both pulled out and laid there in a daze. Toji tried not to put too much of his weight on you, but he was shaking too much so he plopped on you making you squeal. You three were too far gone and you all loved it at the moment.

Toji finally got a little bit of energy and rolled off the two of you, now laying on the side of you two with his eyes closed and sweat glands dripping down his hair and face.

You looked up at yuushi and already saw he was looking at you, so you tried to turn away yet he was faster, “ Come on, don’t go shy on me again. Just lay with us. Give me a kiss. Also, round two in about 30 mins’. Hope you two are ready.” You slowly leaned in to give him a kiss. Toji was too tired and speechless to say anything so he nodded his head, gulping down his spit afterwards. Your skin was soft like a plushie in his hands, so warm and comfortable to hold. When you two are alone, he’s going to treat you how Toji did but better, meanwhile Toji is gonna do the opposite of the treatment he did with you today when you two are alone.

They were pretty difficult to understand but at least they were going to fulfill your fantasy and desires, whilst making them reality for you.

━━ ༉⁩༊⁩ Tagging: @dejwrites @eiflawriting @happygoluckyalexis @bontens-angel @simpingfor-wakasa @mastermindenoshimaalicia and anyone else who wants to be included…

#lady k and the sick man #lady k and the sick man smut #yuushi totsumoto smut #yuushi totsumoto x reader #toji fushiguro smut #toji fushiguro x reader #jjk smut #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen smut #chubby reader #x black reader #black reader #fem reader #crossover #anime smut #anime x black!reader #anime x reader #anime men x reader #anime men

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girlgenius1111 · 5 months

Text

Just Admit It

part 2 of do you need me!!

does it count as proofreading if I scrolled through it really fast before posting?

Falling asleep in Alexia's arms seemed to be a cure all- you'd woken up a few hours later and the pain in your head had dulled significantly. Alexia was just so relieved that you were feeling better, and didn't want to ruin your good mood by bringing up how you'd acted earlier. So, even though your reluctance to allow her to take care of you worried her deeply, she let it go, vowing to keep a close eye on you.

You wished that that had been the end of it. It should have been; your migraines were normally really rare. You'd never had more than one in the span of a few months, normally going a while in between episodes. Which was why you just dealt with them; they weren't a common enough occurrence for you to go to a doctor or something.

You must have been extra stressed, though, which you knew was the cause of your migraines. Between a hectic club schedule, and an insane international one, you were exhausted. Seeing how stressed Alexia was only made you feel worse, until you were a walking ball of anxiety going into the holiday break.

You and Alexia had just played last game of the year, a champions league group stage game, extremely ready to relax. It seems your relaxation time came a little late, though, because you felt the beginnings of a migraine starting to pulse in your brain on the drive home.

You were determined to keep this one to yourself. What had happened a couple weeks ago, letting Alexia see you in that state, could not happen again. Even if she told you she didn't mind. Even if she'd specifically asked you to tell her the next time you didn't feel well. You just couldn't. You kept quiet all the way home, heading inside and immediately curling up on the couch while Alexia sat next to you.

Alexia wasn't stupid, and she knew you very well. She knew you weren't feeling well, could tell from your silence in the car; normally you'd be all hyper after a game, changing the song every other minute and talking nonstop about whatever came to your mind. She loved hyper-post game y/n, who always managed to bring a smile to her face, no matter what mood she was in. Your lack of energy in the car was concerning, as was your behavior upon arriving home. Normally, the two of you picking dinner consisted of you going back and forth until one of you was so hungry that you just agreed to something you didn't want. Alexia pulled out her phone, prepared to start listing ideas, expecting this to take a while.

"What about sushi?" She suggested, half joking because you really didn't like sushi, and would normally complain about having to pick something random off the menu.

"Sure." You responded quietly, and Alexia's head raised to look at you, thinking she must have heard wrong.

"Okay... do you want fried rice?" she asked, eyes studying you closely.

"I'm actually not that hungry, I'll probably just make a sandwich or something" you replied, and Alexia's eyebrows rose even farther up on her face. Ordering food out was... your favorite thing. Choosing to eat something from home instead of getting something from a restaurant was unheard of. She had half a mind to check you for a fever, but she was already suspicious that your head was hurting.

She took in your appearance, really looking at you. Your eyebrows were slightly furrowed, as if allowing your eyes to be open all the way was too much. You unconsciously rubbed your left temple with your finger, and your jaw was completely clenched. It was clear that you were in pain. Alexia set her phone down, scooting a little closer to you.

"Are you feeling alright?" She asked, bracing herself for your response. Sure enough, your whole body tensed, and she watched your face as all traces of discomfort were wiped away.

"I'm fine, just tired." You assured her, not really aware of how aware she was of how you were feeling. Alexia decided to push, just a little.

"If you're sure. You can tell me if you're not feeling well, cariño. I won't be mad." Her voice was soft, as if she was talking to a cornered animal, and you were suddenly fighting the inexplicable urge to cry. You want to tell her, you really did, but you couldn't. You didn't want to be too much, and you'd already been far too weak in front of her before. You forced yourself to meet her eyes, willing yourself to not feel anything as you took the love and worry she held on her face.

"I'm fine, amor, seriously." You responded, fighting to keep your voice steady. You were careful not to promise anything, not wanting to break it. You were fine. Your head hurt, and the lights made your eyes ache, and the room was starting to spin lightly whenever you moved your head, but it wasn't anything you couldn't handle. You gave Alexia a half smile, and she sighed, smiling back. You could tell she didn't really believe you.

If you were going to be stubborn, you could be stubborn. Alexia was dead set on you coming to her this time, on forcing you to realize that you needed her, and that was okay.

The rest of the evening passed slowly. Alexia put on some random reality show that she insisted she only watched for you, even though she'd let out comments like, "well maybe if you weren't such a douche, derek, everyone wouldn't hate you" completely unprompted. You promised her you'd eat after the episode ended, her food arriving in the middle. Instead, the credits played, and you avoided her eyes as you spoke.

Standing up only slightly unsteadily, you said, "I think I'm gonna go to bed Ale, I'm really tired." The pain in your head had only intensified and you were desperate to escape to your bedroom where you could hide your tears in the pillow. Alexia looked up at you with surprise and concern.

"You haven't eaten anything, y/n, and it's only 8:00."

"I know, I'm really not hungry though. Goodnight baby, I love you." You didn't even kiss her goodnight as you headed to bed, knowing that if you tried to bend over to do so, you'd probably end up face down in her lap. She looked after you, bewildered. She really couldn't understand why you were so reluctant to tell her that you weren't feeling well.

You changed into pajamas and curled up under the covers, surprisingly finding yourself rather sleepy. Your head hurt, a lot, but somehow you felt yourself drifting off.

Alexia tried to stay up till a normal time, but she couldn't resist climbing into bed with you. At least in your sleep, you couldn't push her away from you. So, at 9, she headed into the bedroom, finding you asleep, head buried in her pillow instead of your own. She smiled, taking in the sight of you completely dressed in clothes from her side of the dresser. She was tempted to pull clothes from your side of the dresser as revenge, but instead settled on a pair of her own shorts, and the stupid fuzzy sweatshirt you loved. She didn't like wearing it, and she hated sleeping in it, but the look on your face when she put it on last time, as if you'd maybe begun to understand a fraction of the love that Alexia had for you, was enough to get it on her tonight.

She slid into bed next to you, fitting herself into the small space you'd left her when you'd taken over her pillow. You had the hood of one of her hoodies pulled up, and under it your face was flushed, you looked warm, so she carefully pulled the hood down, allowing fresh air to hit your face and hopefully cool you down. You grumbled slightly, shifting over until you were practically laying on top of your girlfriend. Alexia held in a laugh, and snuggled into you. She felt sleep tugging at her, and she hoped when you both woke up in the morning, you'd feel better.

-----

You didn't. You woke up only a few hours after Alexia had come to bed, in blinding pain. Your head had never hurt this bad before, no migraine had every felt this intense. You knew you should do something, wake Alexia up probably, but you really couldn't move. You were laid on top of Alexia, head tucked into her neck. She was sound asleep, one arm wrapped around you, holding you securely against her. You tried to shift, just a little, but the slight movement intensified the pain in your head, until you were biting your lip to keep from crying out. You couldn't stop the tears, though, and they fell steadily onto Alexia's neck.

Alexia woke to the sensation of something wet on her neck. She was incredibly groggy, and she just barely registered that you were laying against her.

"Why is my neck wet?" She grumbled, speaking in her normal voice, although much more garbled than normal. At the volume of her voice in your ear, you let out a whimper of pain, unable to contain it.

Alexia was fully awake in a second, remembering that you'd gone to bed not feeling well, the sound you'd just made alerting her to the fact that you were silently crying into her skin. She didn't move though, only starting to rub your back softly.

"Hey, bebé, what is it?" she cooed, keeping her voice at a whisper. You didn't respond, shoulder still shaking with silent cries, and she grew even more concerned. "Please tell me what's wrong, I can't help unless you tell me," she pleaded.

The desperation in her voice got to you, and you managed to roll yourself off of her, onto your back, with minimal sounds of discomfort. Alexia rolled onto her side, propping herself up on her elbow to look down at you. She kept her touch feather light as the pads of her fingers lightly wiped away the tears on your face.

"Open your eyes for me, please?" You did as she asked, thankful for the darkness. Your face was screwed up with pain, eyes red and puffy from crying. "Now tell me what's hurting," she said, because there was no question you were in pain.

Your bottom lip trembled as you looked up at Alexia, trying to find the words to express what was going on.

"M-my head," you told her, voice breaking as you spoke through your tears. "Migraine. Really bad."

"Oh, bebé, I'm so sorry. What can I get you? Medicine? An ice pack? Anything," she seemed so eager to help, to fix it, and you felt even worse about what you were about to say.

You'd never felt this bad before. You could barely think. What few thoughts you could form, all told you that you needed to go to the hospital. You knew once the words were out of your mouth, Alexia would freak out, and there'd be no going back. You took a deep breath, closing your eyes, before speaking.

"Ale, you need to take me to the hospital." She was silent for a few moments, and you opened your eyes again to look at her. The fear painted across her face was horrifying.

Your words stunned her. For you, stubborn, independent you, to tell her she needed to take you to the hospital, you must have been in indescribable pain. She allowed herself to panic for only a moment, before she took a deep breath, and burst into action.

"Okay, hospital, I can do that. Should I call an ambulance?" She tried to sound more put together than she felt.

"No, too loud. Drive me?" You were back to speaking in half sentences. She would drive you, she really would, but she took one look at her hands, shaking uncontrollably in panic, and she knew she shouldn't get behind the wheel of the car. Maybe she should have been better in a crisis, maybe she would have been if it had been anyone else. But it was you, and you were her weakness. She didn't want to worry you, though, and she knew if she said she was panicking too much to drive, you'd worry, even in this state.

"Okay mi amor, let me change, and we'll go." You mumbled an agreement, and she climbed out of bed, grabbing her phone. She headed into the closet, shutting the door behind her before flicking the light on. She dialed quickly hoping to god that Mapi had her ringer on.

"This better be good Putellas, I swear." Mapi's voice came over the line, grumpy and harsh.

"Mapi, I need you to drive me and y/n to the hospital." Alexia felt tears pricking her eyes, and she blinked them away, knowing she needed to keep it together.

"Por qué?!" Mapi responded, sounding much more awake. Alexia heard shuffling over the phone, and a yelp that was probably Mapi waking Ingrid up.

"She has a migraine and she said it's really bad and she needs to go to the hospital."

"She asked to go?" Mapi sounded surprised.

"Si."

"Shit, okay we're coming now, we'll be there in a couple minutes." Like Alexia, Mapi recognized how bad you must have been feeling if you had asked to go to the hospital. Neither of them had ever been so grateful to live so close to each other before.

Alexia headed back into the bedroom, having changed while on the phone into sweatpants and a t-shirt, and leaned down to kiss your forehead.

"Mapi's coming to drive us, she'll be here in a minute. I'm gonna pick you up to carry you to the car now, vale?" She whispered the words against your forehead.

You replied with a soft, "Okay," pain lacing your voice. You didn't care that Alexia had called Mapi, you didn't care about anything as long as you didn't have to go in an ambulance with the sirens on. As carefully as one would pick up a newborn baby, Alexia gathered you into her arms, holding you tight against her, carrying you out of the room and to the front door. It opened right as she got to it, and Ingrid was standing in front of her, spare key in hand, hair sleep tousled, but looking alert.

"Take her to the car, I'll grab your wallet and keys," Alexia nodded, sliding on shoes before heading out the door, thanking the universe that she had such good friends. Mapi was waiting by car, pulling the door open, wordlessly helping Alexia slide into the backseat. You sat sideways on Alexia's lap, head tucked back into her neck as your tears hit her skin over and over. You clung to her tightly, hands fisted in her shirt, as you tried to stop yourself from sobbing loudly. The walk to the car had been enough to almost make you pass out, but you'd held on to consciousness.

Ingrid climbed into the front seat then, quietly telling Alexia she'd locked the door behind her. Mapi pulled the car out of the driveway, looking in the rearview mirror every so often, studying your form curled up against Alexia. She'd never seen you like this, and she'd never seen Alexia this panicked either. Ingrid was thinking the same thing, and she reached a hand back, giving Alexia's knee a squeeze.

"Everything is gonna be fine, the doctors will know what to do, they'll fix her up fast." Ingrid kept her voice low and reassuring. Alexia nodded, slightly frantically, holding you tighter against her.

The drive to the hospital seemed to take forever, Mapi taking care to drive as carefully as possible, since every jerk the car made caused a whimper of pain to spill from your lips. Alexia paid no attention to the dark city passing her by, her only focus on you in her arms.

Mapi pulled the car right up in front of the doors to the emergency room, and Ingrid was flying out of the car, opening up the door and helping Alexia get you out. Mapi drove off to park the car, while Ingrid walked the two of you inside. Luckily, it was pretty empty, and the nurses ushered Alexia to put you down on a bed in a room almost instantly. She explained the situation, as you were clearly in too much pain to speak, and the nurses were nodding, hooking you up to all sorts of things, before telling Alexia to wait in the waiting room until they had run some tests.

She hesitated, looking desperately at you. You looked so small in the hospital bed, eyes squeezed tightly shut against the harsh lights, hands balled into fists. There were 5 people working over you, all seemed calm and not worried, but Alexia still had to fight the urge to climb into the bed with you, and pull you into your arms until you stopped crying. She felt a hand on her arm, tugging her into the hallway.

"C'mon. She'll be okay, you need to let them work though." Ingrid stated, encouraging Alexia to follow her out into the hall. With one last look at you, she let Ingrid pull her out of the room and walk her back to the waiting room. They found Mapi there, arguing with the nurse at the desk, trying to figure out where you went.

Alexia took a seat in a chair, sighing heavily, and burying her face in her hands. Ingrid and Mapi exchanged a look, taking seats on either side of their captain. Mapi rested her hand on Alexia's back, and was startled when she heard Alexia sniffle into her hands.

Ingrid rolled her eyes at the look on Mapi's face, who looked completely stunned to see her best friend crying. Sure, Alexia never cried, ever, but this situation definitely warranted it.

"She's gonna be fine, Ale. She's in a lot of pain, but thats how migraines work. They'll give her something for it, make sure nothing else is going on, and discharge her." Ingrid told her, clearly trying to make Alexia feel better.

"She's right. Y/n has had a stressful month, this is just her body reacting to it. She'll be fine." Mapi continued, pulling herself together enough to comfort her friend.

Alexia lifted her head then, and both other girls wanted to cry themselves at the look on her face.

"I've never seen her in that much pain before. And for her to ask me to take her to the hospital, she must have been in so much pain." Alexia's voice was shaking when she spoke, wiping her face with her hands to rid it of tears. Mapi and Ingrid looked at her sympathetically.

"I know, but they've probably already got her all drugged out, she's probably not even in any pain anymore. She's funny on pain meds, remember when she got her wisdom teeth out?" Mapi tried to lighten the mood. Alexia smiled slightly, remembering how goofy you'd been. Her friends had helped, she felt marginally better.

And Mapi was right. The doctors had ruled out any serious brain issues, and given you a nice big dose of painkillers. You felt the ache in your head fade as you yourself drifted off again. Your last thought before you fell asleep was that you hoped they'd let Alexia back soon, and that she'd brought the fuzzy sweatshirt she wore to bed, because you were kind of cold.

-----

When you woke, it took you a few minutes to remember where you were. Your brain felt heavy, but not in the painful way it had before. You tried to blink your eyes open, but they weren't really cooperating yet. You tried to bring a hand up to rub at them, only to find that you couldn't move your right arm at all. Using your left hand, despite the IV, you rubbed the sleep out of your eyes, and cracked them open. You looked down to see what had taken your arm hostage, and found Alexia passed out on it. Her cheek was smushed up against your sheets, both arms wrapped around your one, while her hand somehow held tightly to yours.

You were suddenly overwhelmed; by both the love you felt for the girl laying at your bedside, and the love you felt from her. Tears sprung to your eyes again, and you sighed, slightly annoyed with the amount you'd been crying recently. She stirred at the slight sound you made, eyes blinking open, slightly confused, before she shot straight up in her seat. Her hands released yours, and they hovered frantically over you, as her mouth opened and closed. She was groggy from sleep, and alarmed that you were crying, and her brain was not moving fast enough to decide on a course of action. It would have been funny if she hadn't looked so panicked.

She found her voice then, raising her hands to cradle your cheeks. "Are you in pain? Why are you crying? I should call the doctor, let me find a nurse," her words came out a mile a minute, and you smiled at her, placing your hands over hers.

"Relax, amor. I'm not in pain, sit back down." She looked at you doubtfully, slowly sitting back in her chair.

"If you aren't in pain, why are you crying?" She asked. She was surprised when you blushed, no longer meeting her eyes.

"I just woke up and you were here with me, and... I don't know. It was overwhelming. In a good way. I just love you, a lot." You stuttered through the sentence, before lifting your eyes to meet hers again. her gaze had softened, and you melted at the look on her face.

She pulled you in then, pressing a bruising kiss to your lips. She pulled back after a minute, peppering little kisses all across your face until you were laughing, and she had cracked a smile. Quickly, though, her face turned serious again.

"Of course I was here when you woke up. Where else would I be?" She asked, seeming genuinely unsure of where else she would possibly have been.

"I don't know. You still surprise me sometimes, with how much you care. I don't always expect it." You responded. You weren't sure if you were just feeling sappy, or if the drugs were making you talk, but you found yourself overly willing to be honest with her.

"Bebé, why didn't you tell me you weren't feeling well last night?" She replied, eyes searching yours.

"I didn't want to bother you, you were tired too. And, I guess I'm just worried."

"Worried about what?"

You took a deep breath, picking at a stray thread of the thin blanket laying across your legs. "Worried that if I let you see me like that, all weak, you won't want me anymore. Why would you want to take care of me?"

Alexia was quiet after you spoke, and you made yourself look back up at her. She looked like she was thinking hard.

"Nothing you could ever do would be too much for me. Nothing. Not being sick, or in pain, or sad, or angry. I want you just as much then as I do when you're happy. And I always want to take care of you. You are mi niña bonita y perfecta. I want everything with you, even the stuff that isn't so fun." She spoke slowly, determined that you catch every word. "Okay?"

You swallowed the lump in your throat, and nodded. "Okay. I promise to try to do better, and let you help me." You figured it was the least you could do, after the little speech she just made. A speech that made you want to run home and grab the ring you'd hidden in the back of your closet, and ask her, right then and there.

Alexia smiled, satisfied, leaning in to kiss you again. You asked her what the doctor had said, and she told you that he thought you hadn't rested enough after the last migraine, and you'd obviously been extra stressed recently. That, combined with the lack of sleep you'd been getting due to early trainings and late nights filled with... other forms of exercise with Alexia, had compounded to give you the migraine you'd experienced.

He recommended a neurologist, who could help you manage them, and also that you find a better way to deal with your stress than... not dealing with it at all. You were free to go once the drugs wore off though. Alexia made you promise to see the neurologist before she brought up the topics of visitors.

"Ingrid and Mapi are still in the waiting room. They were both pretending not to be worried but Mapi has been pacing pretty much since we got here, and Ingrid's gotten all snippy, the way she does when she's worried." You laughed, picturing the scene clearly. You told her to go get them, and she left to do so.

While she was gone, you thought about that ring in your closet again. You had big plans for it over the summer, but you wondered if maybe you couldn't wait until then. You might have to plan something sooner, or risk blurting it out while waiting for the right time. Either way, you were more sure than ever that Alexia was it for you, and more convinced that you'd ever been that you were it for her.

#woso imagine #woso x reader #woso #alexia putellas x reader #alexia putellas

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13uswntimagines · 4 months

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I'll Take Care of You (Alessia Russo x MMA!fighter R)

Request: Could we maybe see some slightly more stern dom alessia dealing with r (doesn’t have to be smut) in front of the team because reader starts acting bratty with them?

Part of the same universe as the come down.

Warning: Slight touching but not actual smut. Also D/S fic

Author's note: Hey Y'all, i really hope you enjoy this. I want to point out that D/S dynamics are based on trust and communication, so that's what I chose to focus on. Alessia is a soft dom, and chooses a punishment that she knows will be effective. If you want to chat or have any ideas or comments, feel free to hit me up.

Gearing up for a fight was the equivalent of stretching out a rubber band to its limit. It was 8 weeks of nonstop training, 4 weeks of conditioning your body to shed water so you could make weight, 2 weeks of cameras following you around for UFC embedded, and 1 week of media bombardment where you had to listen to grown men act like 5-year-olds talking about who was going to beat who.

It was utterly exhausting.

The only upside was that at the end of it, you got to step into the octagon and do what you did best.

You got to put the plan your coaches drilled over and over into your brain into place. You got to release all of the built-up anxiety and frustration from camp.

You got to fight.

It was like coming up for oxygen after being trapped underwater. Sometimes the cage felt like the only place you could really breathe on your own.

It had been your safe haven for almost as long as you could remember, which was kinda strange considering your health was put at immediate risk every time you stepped inside. It had been your escape from your family, and your only coping mechanism for as long as you could remember.

To go through training camp, and fight week and the weight cut, only to have your fight pulled at the last minute was fucking devastating.

It was like when Alessia brought you all the way to the precipice of an orgasm and then pulled away just before you could tumble over it, except far far far worse.

It made your blood boil. It made the monster in your chest roar that your opponent couldn’t do his end of the job to make the fight go on after all of the shit he was talking. And there was nothing anyone could say or do to make it better.

Dana promised that the fight would be rescheduled. He even threw in that if you won, you would be next in line for a title shot.

But it didn’t help.

The fight was set to be at the O2 arena, meaning your girlfriend and all of her teammates had been set to see you, and now they couldn’t. You couldn’t get your 10 training weeks back and you would have to do the weight cut all over again.

It was a shit sandwich, and it made you feel completely out of control. It made you crave for someone else to put you right again. For Alessia to remind you that she had control always.

Maybe that’s why you chose your satin button-down shirt to go to dinner with your girlfriend and her teammates and paired it with tight black skinny jeans.

It wasn’t often that you liked to push Alessia’s control. That you toed the boundaries that she set, but tonight it felt like the prize comparable to stepping into the cage.

With the little black dress she had worn, you really couldn’t blame yourself either. You could never resist when she showed off her legs. You were obsessed and she knew it. It was probably why she had chosen the outfit, to begin with.

It was probably designed as a reward of sorts for after your fight, except you weren’t having a fight. So you supposed it was kind of like a consolation prize.

Except you felt wound too tightly to really enjoy it.

“So that’s it, they just call the whole thing off?” Ella asked leaning forward to rest her chin in her hand.

“Yep,” You popped the p, your finger running a gentle circle on Alessia’s exposed knee. “I can’t even sign a paper that says I’m fine fighting him despite the failed drug test, and it’s too late to find a replacement even if we allow a catchweight,”

She let the movement continue, the hand wrapped around your shoulder gently squeezing the arm furthest away from her.

While she was relieved that the rules prevented you from fighting a man on steroids, she knew how gutted you were about the cancellation.

“Probably for the best mate,” Leah said, sipping her wine.

You shrugged, letting your finger trail a little higher on Alessia’s leg.

It was slightly too… forward for the steakhouse her teammates had chosen, but with the dimmed lights you figured no one could see your hand under the white tablecloth anyway. Not with how close you were sitting to your girlfriend.

“I already made weight, so it’s kind of a waste,” You muttered, dragging your nails up the inside of her thigh to just below the hem of her dress. “I’ll have to start camp all over again unless I take something short notice,”

“Can you do that?” Mary asked, from your other side.

You shrugged again. “I told Dana I was game if he needed someone to fill in, so we’ll have to see,”

Alessia’s eyebrows pulled tighter together “You didn’t tell me that, love,”

“Didn’t I?” You asked, feigning dumb, as your fingers finally made it past the hem of her dress. “Must have forgotten. I’m excited to see you all play on Tuesday though,”

You ran your nail across the sensitive skin on the inside of her thigh, dangerously close to her center. But before you could make it any further, her free hand caught your wrist, and repositioned you so your hand was resting very innocently near her knee again.

“Ireland is always fun to face,” Ella smiled at you. “Should be a bit chippy,”

“I’ll definitely be rocking my MacCabe jersey,” You matched her expression, your thumb again beginning to rub circles into Alessia’s skin.

Leah frowned, dropping her menu. “You will?”

“Absolutely,” You smirked, wiggling your eyebrows and slyly trailing your thumb back up Alessia’s thigh. “Gotta support my favorite foul-mouthed Gooner,”

Leah’s eyes went wide, and Alessia squeezed your shoulder.

“And what about me?” Your girlfriend asked, a pout pulling at her lips.

You wiggled your eyebrows, a witty remark at the tip of your tongue, knowing it would piss her off, but the tension in your chest made you unable to stop yourself.

You wanted to push her. To force a reaction, even when you knew all you had to do was ask for what you wanted.

“Are you ladies ready to order?” A waiter asked, appearing behind Leah before you could let it fly.

You let your smirk widen, closing your menu with a thud and making eye contact with the waiter.

“Since she’s not on the menu,” You started, leaning closer to your girlfriend for just a second, edging your hand even further up her thigh until it was again past the hem of her dress. “I think I’ll have the tomahawk, medium rare with a Yorkie and the roasted carrots please,”

You winked at the waiter for good measure as the table giggled and Alessia’s cheeks turned bright red.

The waiter cleared his throat, turning his attention to your girlfriend. “And for you ma’am?”

Alessia opened her mouth, probably to order, but you cut her off instead.

“She’ll take the sirloin, medium with the Orzo and kale salad,” You said, reciting her normal order with perfect precision. “And she’ll be having me for dessert later,”

More giggles erupted from your friends, and you dragged your hand impossibly higher, extending your pinky so it brushed against her underwear.

She inhaled sharply next to you, sending you a warning side eye as the rest of the table continued to order, but she didn’t immediately remove your hand.

You ignored her warning, letting your pinky slide over the satiny fabric of her underwear.

It wasn’t what she normally wore, and you couldn’t help the wolfish grin that took over your features.

She had worn lingerie for you.

Maybe that should have stopped you. Made you consider that you wouldn’t get anything if you kept pushing, but again you couldn’t seem to help yourself.

“Will you be in the Ireland friends and family section then?” Leah asked, wiggling her eyebrows at your girlfriend. “Cause I don’t think my family or Less’ will enjoy you wearing the opposing team’s jersey,”

You made a noise like you were considering it as you finally slid your hand up and cupped your girlfriend’s heat. “I don’t think I’d feel at home though. Surely your family can deal with it right Less?”

Alessia nodded once, very stiffly. “My family loves you no matter what you’re wearing,”

You smiled impishly at her, adding just a little more pressure to her core.

She shifted in her seat, leaning very close to your ear, as Ella started talking about some movie she and Joe had watched, taking the attention of the rest of Alessia’s teammates.

“They’d even love you if you had to wear your collar at the game,” She chuckled darkly in your ear, her voice soft enough to get lost in the noise of the restaurant as her free hand yet again caught your wrist and pulled your hand back to a much more innocent position. “Now behave, or I promise you’ll regret it,”

You pulled away, your devilish smirk only getting broader. “No,”

Her eyebrows furrowed her expression something between anger and concern and warning, like she was trying to figure out why you were pushing the boundaries when you never did before.

You wiggled yours in return, offering her nothing else before joining the conversation of her teammates.

You weren’t ready to talk yet.

You were too content digging yourself deeper and deeper.

*****

You continue to push Alessia all throughout dinner, taking every opportunity to make her blush or to creep your hand further up her thigh. At one point you had even wiggled a finger beneath her underwear before she could stop you.

And your behavior hadn’t stopped once you left the restaurant.

You definitely placed your hand far too low on her waist as you and your friends walked back to the hotel the UFC had rented for you, and winked cheekily at the fans as you entered the building, spending far too long signing things and flirting just to annoy your girlfriend.

You knew from the “come on darling,” and the way she wrapped her arm around you, her fingers closing gently around the back of your neck that you were in serious trouble as she led you into the hotel and to the elevator.

“Good luck mate,” Leah nodded towards you as she stepped into her hotel room after Mary and Ella. “Think you’re gonna need it after that show,”

She tilted her head toward your girlfriend glaring a hole in Leah’s doorframe.

“Good night Leah,” Your girlfriend bit out, pressing her thumb into the space at the very center of the back of your neck.

Leah rolled her eyes at the movement, well aware of the dynamic between you and your girlfriend. More aware than most of her teammates for both club and country because of how long you had known her. “Right you two, do have too much fun,”

You stared at the door for a long moment after it closed, the tension in your chest bleeding down to your stomach.

You knew your time was up. That you would have to pay the piper so to speak, and it had guilt swirling along with the unpleasantness.

You knew that all you had to do was utter a word and it would all be over.

You knew that Alessia would stick to your limits, no matter how hard you pushed her, but you couldn’t help the… lingering anxiety that came from your past relationships.

The ones that took advantage of your submissiveness, and the unhealthy way you had always chosen to deal with stress. The ones that ignored your pain for their own pleasure.

“Come on then,” Alessia said, very gently running the nail of her thumb down the length of the back of your neck, and squeezing your shoulder.

You hummed, allowing her to lead you down the hallway to your own hotel room door, but she paused before she opened it. You looked up at her, realizing suddenly that you were trapped between her and the door.

She stepped closer so your noses were nearly touching. She dragged her hand from your neck to your chin, using her thumb to tilt your head to where she wanted it.

“I love you,” She said, her voice soft and sincere. “No matter what,”

She leaned in the last centimeter separating you, connecting your lips in a very sweet kiss.

You leaned into it, opening your mouth when her tongue poked out, welcoming it and meeting it with your own so they spun in a slow dance.

It was the reminder that you desperately needed.

The promise that she would take care of you, even when you acted like a brat.

She pulled away just enough to disconnect your lips, and your mouths separated with a low pop.

“Remind me of your colors,” Alessia said, her thumb running across your cheek.

“Green for good, yellow for slow down, and red for stop,” You recited, your voice breathless.

“Good girl,” She hummed. “Open the door, and take off your shirt and pants once we get inside,”

You swallowed hard at the change of tone.

“Yes Miss,” You said, already pulling the key card from the back pocket of your jeans. You didn’t look away from her as you fumbled until you heard the lock on the door beep, and clumsily pushed it open.

You stumbled backward, unwilling to break eye contact with your girlfriend because you knew you would probably get very little of it tonight.

She turned away from you as soon as the door slammed shut, busying herself with something you didn’t know.

“I believe I told you to do something,” She said, not even sparing a look over her shoulder at you, and you realized you had been staring for too long.

You cleared your throat, your fingers trembling as they unbuttoned your straining shirt.

You carefully pulled the satin materials from your shoulders, folding it neatly and laying it on the bed before you started on your pants.

It took you three tries to undo the button, the zipper getting caught in the stretchy material of your boxers. You peeled your tight jeans down your legs, folding them and placing them next to your shirt.

You felt Alessia’s presence behind you as you pulled off your shoes and socks.

As soon as they had been placed in their rightful place, her hand found its way to your bare back.

The touch was soothing and grounding and exactly what you needed to combat the slightly floaty feeling in your brain.

The hand slid up your back, all the way to your neck.

“Kneel,”

The soft squeeze on the back of your neck was like magic, as was the soft, but stern order.

You sank to your knees without question, your butt resting on your heels, your hands facing palm up on your thighs, your back straight and your head bowed, as the tension in your chest slowly ebbed away.

“I think we need to have a chat,” She continued, the hand on your neck sliding up to run through the hair at the base of your skull. Her nails scratched soothingly at your scalp. “Because your behavior in the restaurant is not the behavior of the good girl I trained,”

You grunted, glaring at a spot in the carpet.

You didn’t want to talk.

You already had to talk to Dana, to your coaches, and to the media. You had nothing left to say.

“Do you want to tell me what that was about at dinner?” She asked you, the fingers on your scalp wrapping through your curls. She gave it a sharp tug, forcing you to look up at her. “Because I’d really like to know what the fuck you were playing at,”

Her blue eyes burned into you, concerned and… something else lingering below the surface.

“I wasn’t playing at anything,” You grit out.

She raised a perfect eyebrow at you, as she searched your face.

“Is this because your fight was canceled?”

You didn’t answer her, unwilling to admit how… off balanced it made you feel.

But that was enough of an answer for her.

Her eyes softened minutely. “Baby,”

You shook your head.

You didn’t want her sympathy or her pity.

You wanted her to crush you.

“Alright,” She signed, tilting your head back so far it was painful. “I’m going to give you 2 options. We can call Clarke and Lexa and they can run you through a workout,”

You shivered at the mention of your respective striking and jujitsu coaches, knowing already that whatever the alternative was, you would be choosing it.

“Or you can take a punishment of my choosing,” She finished. “It won’t be an easy one,”

“I’ll take a punishment,” You muttered after a beat.

You didn't need easy right now.

She hummed, holding you close for a long second, and you relished in the attention.

That had been why you acted out at all anyway.

She dropped her hold on your hair suddenly, and you crashed back on your knees.

“On the wall,” She said, completely cutting contact with you, and walking towards the little kitchen area of the suite.

You let out a shaky breath, pushing yourself to your feet, and shuffled over to the wall next to the television across from the couch.

You turned to face the couch, wincing when Alessia pulled a wine glass out of the cabinet and a jug of water from the counter and returned to you.

She carefully filled the glass to the halfway mark, before her attention turned to you.

You knew immediately what punishment she had chosen.

The rules were simple, you would balance the glass in one of the designated calisthenic positions. If the water spilled, or the glass fell then you would move to the next position. The punishment would be over when you made it through all 15 positions to Alessia’s satisfaction, or if you safeworded.

It sounded easy, or like it wouldn’t be effective, but that was entirely wrong. It was the punishment that you hated the most.

Your stomach never failed to drop when Alessia approached you with the wine glass and water. Just the sight of her with it was enough to have your muscles quivering at the impending fatigue.

“Ready darling?”

You made a low sound, leaning back against the wall, bending your knees, and getting into the first position.

A wall sits with your knees pressed together to focus the pressure on your quads.

She used a hand on your shoulder to push you further down the wall until your thighs sat parallel to the floor, and then very carefully balanced the stem of the wine glass between your knees so the base just barely brushed your hamstring.

You frowned. She usually balanced it on top of your legs further up your thighs so all you had to do was stay level. But where it was now meant that you would have to stay level and squeeze with your adductors so it didn’t slip and spill the water.

“Tell me your color,” She said, her thumb sweeping under your chin, drawing your eyes away from the glass to meet her blue.

“Green,” you murmured, leaning into the gentle touch.

“Good,” She hummed, cupping your cheek for another long second before she pulled away. “I’ll be right there, reading my book,”

Your gaze trailed after her as she settled herself on the couch directly across from you, picking up the 7 Husbands of Evelyn Hugo. She easily found her page and began to read.

You glanced back to the balancing glass between your knees. It was already shaking slightly, the liquid vibrating around the bowl of the glass with the effort of your muscles to keep it in place.

It irritated you that you could already feel your quads and adductors quivering. It was pathetic that they were already fatigued after only 30 seconds.

You grit your teeth, letting your hips slip down further so you could squeeze with your glutes to take a little bit of the pressure off of your adductors. The glass shifted minutely, and the water inside sloshed dangerously before it settled.

Your eyes flickered back up to Alessia, wondering if she saw it too, but her eyes stayed planted in her book.

That irritated you too.

The only upside to your fight being canceled was that you got to spend more time with her. You wouldn’t have to split your attention between her and not getting your face caved in.

Now you didn’t even have that.

You thought of safewording and forcing an early end to your punishment. It would be a violation of the rules though.

But when she found out that you broke her trust (the most severe infraction you could ever commit) she might choose a more… harsh punishment. One of the ones that was listed in the soft limits the two of you had agreed upon. One that would separate you from reality, and leave you feeling floaty and thoroughly controlled. Thoroughly owned.

A part of you wanted her to forcibly put you in your place. To disregard how bad it would feel tomorrow and the bad memories it would bring up for you, and just demolish you. To crush your will and grind you into dust. To beat you into oblivion.

It was what your opponent would have done anyway.

You knew Alessia would never agree to it while you were this upset. She didn’t like to give in to your self-destructive tendencies.

The glass between your knees shook again, drawing your attention back to the warm fire setting deeply into your quads. They would ache tomorrow you were sure, but then again wasn’t that part of the point?

It would be a reminder that even when she wasn’t with you, you belonged to Alessia. It was an invisible mark that claimed you. That reminded you she would always take control when you felt dangerously unstable.

And then it clicked.

This punishment was Alessia’s favorite because it was based on your choice to obey her. Your choice to push your body to its limits to please her. Your choice to give her control over you.

She didn’t need to use a belt or a paddle to bend you to her will.

She just had to ask.

You just had to relax and trust that she would take care of you.

You let out a long breath, counting down from 3 in your head. You let it fall back into the wall with a low thump and your shoulders sagged, as the remaining tension in your chest drained out of you.

“Good girl,” Alessia said softly, and the page of her book turned. Your eyes darted back to her, hoping that they would be on you, but they weren’t.

She looked so composed, both legs tucked under her, reading her book. It was diametrically opposed to how you felt, completely out of control. A quivering mess fighting to stay in a simple wall sit.

It further reminded you of your place, and the weight of it was enough to have your eyes sliding closed.

You focused on your breathing, 3 seconds and 3 seconds out. Deep and slow.

You lasted for more breaths before the glass slid from between your legs, landing on the carpeted floor with a light thud.

Your eyes snapped open, and again you expected to meet Alessia’s eyes, but they remained trained on her book.

“Next please,” She said softly, flipping another page in her book.

You slid down the wall to the floor, sucking in another long breath as you nodded, wishing that she would just look at you, but you knew that was part of the punishment too.

You took another breath as you rolled over to your stomach and sat yourself up on your elbows, squeezing your core. It was a slightly modified plank designed to show off the muscles in your back and arms for the benefit of your girlfriend and to give your legs a break for a bit.

She waited until you were in a position to stand, slowly padding over to you and grabbing the wine glass off of the floor.

She paused next to you, and you felt the way her eyes dragged across the muscles on your back.

“Always so pretty for me,” She hummed and you heard the water as she refilled the glass. “Too bad you can’t have the reward I had planned,”

Her touch lingered as she carefully balanced it between your shoulder blades, and stepped away.

“Let’s see if you can beat your best time on this one,” She said, talking more at you than to you. “Your record is 22 minutes, which isn’t quite championship timing. I think you need to make it at least 25,”

You groaned.

Her competitive streak was legendary and often a part of your punishment when you had been particularly ornery. You switched positions at her pleasure, so you knew you would be planking all night if you couldn’t break 25 minutes.

It was like when she decided you needed to break your edging record.

There would be no mercy unless you safeworded.

You focused on your breathing as she sauntered back to the couch, fighting to keep your core and back muscles locked to prevent the glass from tipping.

Your abs clenched, and you so badly wanted to roll your shoulders to relieve the tension building in the space between them. The space holding the glass.

You focused on the sound of Alessia’s breathing. Each rhythmic inhale and exhale like the clicking of a metronome, broken only by the occasional fluttering of a page.

You wished she had put the timer in front of you so you could see how long you had left.

But then again that would probably be worse.

You always found it harder to go the distance in a fight when you could see the clock ticking down. It always made you feel more exhausted at the end of the round, and made standing up off of your stool at the start of the next round that much harder.

You sucked in another breath, refocusing on the sounds of Alessia’s inhales and exhales. You counted each one, letting them wash over you and lul the fog slowly seeping through the crevices in your brain.

It let you forget the trembling in your core muscles and the sting between your shoulders. They didn’t matter. All that mattered was each of Alessia’s breaths, and your ability to please her.

To be honest, you forgot about the water balancing on your back.

You shifted, lifting your head so you could watch Alessia, and that sent the glass tumbling to the floor with a low thud.

She looked up at the noise, pushing herself to her feet and grabbing the glass.

“Good job darling. You made time.” She rewarded you by meeting her eyes for a long second and flashing you a winning smile. “Position 3,”

You took another deep breath as she filled the glass.

You pushed yourself up into a pushup position, slowly lifting your right arm and left leg so they extended.

Your arms shook immediately, and it was then that you recognized just how exhausted you were already. Your core ached in a way that was edging on unpleasant, and your back felt like you had run 5 rounds with your jujitsu coach.

It was strange that you felt so drained and you had only made it through 2 positions.

Alessia waited until you were stable before she balanced the glass in the very same area between your shoulder blades.

The spot that felt so tight.

You knew you weren’t going to last long before she even stepped away. But you tried to breathe through it. You tried to ignore the little beads of sweat collecting at the small of your back, and the cramp setting in just below the glass, radiating up to your neck.

You deserved the pain. You had done your damndest to make sure Alessia gave it to you.

“Tell me your color,” Alessia said, her voice dripping dominance, sending a shiver down your spine and causing the glass to tumble off your back.

You collapsed to the floor.

You hadn’t even made it a minute.

“‘M ok,” You murmured into the carpet, each breath rattling as it left your lips.

You hadn’t even lasted long enough for Alessia to make it back to her seat.

It was pathetic.

“That’s not what I asked you,” She said, crouching next to you, her hand resting on the throbbing space between your shoulders. “Tell me what your color is,”

Your brain ran into overdrive, taking stock of the burn in your thighs, and the way the muscles in your back were locked up tight, and before you could even think through all the reasons why you shouldn’t safe word, “red,” was falling from your lips.

You had been red before you even started position 3, you realized.

“Good girl,” She said, settling fully down beside you, her hand running soothingly up and down your sweat-soaked back. “You did so well for me, and I’m so proud of you for knowing your limits,”

You groaned into the carpet as warmth spread through your chest, chasing away the last of the tightness that had been there since Dana caught you after the weigh-ins.

“‘M sorry for pushing you,” You mumbled, your words nearly getting lost in the floor. “Didn’t know how to…”

You trailed off, losing your train of thought. You weren’t even sure what you didn’t know how to do, only that antagonizing your girlfriend. Your miss. Had been the only way that seemed to make sense to achieve it.

“I know darling,” She hummed, gripping under your arms and shifting so your head was resting in her lap and your upper body was between her legs. “Take some deep breaths for me, and then we’ll get you cleaned up and we can cuddle,”

You made a low sound of agreement. You felt content with her completely around you, her scent enveloping you, and her hands running gently through your tangled hair.

She was the stability to your rocky seas, and you trusted that she would take care of you, just like she had already tonight.

A cuddle sounded perfect because it was perfect.

It was everything you needed. She was everything you needed.

#woso x reader #woso imagines #alessia russo x reader #alessia russo imagine #the come down universe

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whillywisp · 3 months

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Seeing a lot of talks about finnick as a dad/doting husband during pregnancy on the fyp and I must contribute to the conversation 🌱 (warnings: it's long and so fluffy you're gonna die). Part 1.

Part 2 ☁︎

The thing about Finnick is that he has a lot of love to give to anyone who would take it. His heart is overflowing with it, shining cerulean with it. So of course fatherhood came to him as easily as breathing—

Wrong. Have you seen that walking talking ball of anxiety, love and autism?

The day you tell him you're pregnant he passes the fuck out. On the floor. And when he wakes up he cries for an hour straight, thanking you enough times with kisses pressed into every inch of your skin he could reach that the words don't even sound like English anymore. He's so grateful, so fucking grateful and terrified but above all, completely and irrevocably in love with you.

Throughout the pregnancy, he's as paranoid as it gets to the point you have to beg him to please leave you alone and no, Finnick the baby won't be hurt if i eat too fast please breathe and let me breathe but it's all from a place of love. He's lost too much, almost everything in his life. The few people he could still keep were precious to him and he was not going to let any of them forget that least of all his babies. Or baby.

Finnick talks to the baby a lot. Asking the most bizarre question to your bump as if he actually expected a tiny, baby's voice to answer him. He was constantly on about something new and his favourite topic to talk about was whatever his new hyperfixation was and you just nodded and smiled because of course the baby wants to know how to do an alpine stitch! But it was so endearing and relieving to see him finally be happy, finally find a purpose, even if it was to just talk nonstop to your belly. He deserves this, these little pockets of happiness.

And one of his greatest happiness was taking care of you. Circling back to the fact that he starts hyperventilating when his lover so much as sneezes too hard, the hellscape that was pregnancy scared him. No, fuck it, it terrified him. So he did what he always did and loved to do and banned you from anything and everything that needed physical exertion. Chores of any kind were out of order. You were on a healthy diet of four meals a day and of course they included all your cravings that he always presented to you no questions asked thank you very much and you had to take naps, multiple of them, all with his presence as a requirement (you were sure those were just an excuse to cuddle you but you would rather take up another round of hunger games than call him out on it). He attended every appointment, had an alarm set for all the prenatal meds, and always a kiss for the belly and your lips just so you knew that this was it for him. You and your baby were the very centre of his universe and this was him orbiting you both. And you couldn't help but be grateful that you had him to love and cherish just as he did you.

And your favourite way of telling him you loved him was letting him take control over the one thing you knew he loved: baby shopping. With all due respect, this is the type of guy who bought baby shoes when he was eighteen with no baby in sight because look at how tiny this is it's so cute *big sparkly green eyes.* But it's particularly endearing watching him waltz around the store, arms full of onesies and plushies and you kind of just stand there, unable to do anything because what the fuck were you supposed to do at nine months pregnant and married to a man who you *checks notes* gifted a day where he could buy anything he wanted as a birthday present?

I promise you the answer was not 'go into an early labour the second he dumped the shopping bags in the living room' but who am I to say anything?

The baby coming two whole weeks early did not sit well with his anxiety. He was a mess, a complete and utter mess but he was also the most precious angel on this planet so seeing him holding back tears of fear so he could be there for you and hold you tight, so tight, because he was scared he would lose you broke your heart too. While the pain of the labour was bad, knowing he was close, holding you tight as he pressed gentle kisses everywhere, to cater to everything you needed, was enough to realise, he was the one. And you were going to fight through hell for him.

Such a wretched thing, love, you thought to yourself as you felt him shake beside you through the pain and haze, to ask you to hope against hope that the strain on your strength and your fading string of fate would persevere despite it all.

But you did. You survived and so did your precious little baby girl, and so did the last pieces of Finnick's soul, despite it all.

The first time he holds his tiny, tiny baby in his arms, something in his brain just clicks (or maybe his frontal lobe was finally fully developed because of course his baby picked the day before his birthday to make her own entry on planet earth) but whatever it was, it was perfect. His entire world narrowed down to the squirming little angel in his arms and he couldn't help but feel his heart leave his chest for the second time in his life to become hers. She fit right into the crook of his arms, the space in his neck. She fit into his life like another piece of puzzle that he never knew he was look for.

She was his little angel, his little girl. The person he never knew he fought through whole wars for but now, holding her against his chest as he watched you both sleep, he knew this is what he was meant to do. To love, to love, to love. For the sake of it. Simply because he could. Simply because he was alive and it was good enough reason to love with his entire being.

Part 1 because I don't exactly know if you people will like it enough to want more.

#finnick odair x reader #finnick odair x gn!reader #fanfiction #hunger games #finnick imagine #finnick odair #moonfm #finnick odair x male reader #finnick odair imagine #finnick odair x fem!reader

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inkdrinkerworld · 6 months

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omg please write that !!! ur so talented i know it would be amazing !!

Cw: angst, sibling arguments, being perceived as a bad person, anxiety, overthinking 0.8k

“Dove, you can’t keep letting them get away with that! It’s not fair.” Remus is tugging at his hair, his eyes wide as he tries to get his point across.

You’re not exactly sure how you venting about your day had turned into an argument but it had.

You’re on a video call, eyes tired as you explained to Remus the plights of your last few days.

You’d had the most massive falling out with your siblings because you’d tried standing up for yourself and now no one was speaking to you.

Mostly because you’d just resorted to silence than actually continuing the conversation- be it for fear of them fully disliking you or be it just to keep the peace.

Remus had been there for some of your arguments, he knew that eight times out of ten they took simple instructions or comments the wrong way no matter how clear you’d been.

“Rem, I have to. It’s just easier.”

Remus narrows his eyes at you, taking in your tear puffed cheeks, red eyes and shaking form.

“For who? I don’t mean to be harsh, but it’s clearly not easier for you. You’ve been crying nonstop and you’re not speaking to each other.”

You sigh, hard. Remus isn’t getting it and in your annoyance, you think he’s being thick on purpose.

“Remus, it’s just how it always is. We fight, we don’t speak and then it sorts itself out.”

He rubs his forehead. Remus has had this conversation with you before, and while he’s always been open about his opinions, he’s never been this upset.

Most definitely because you’ve never been this upset by it.

“It doesn’t though, you forgive them without saying anything and bottle it up until the next disagreement.” You’re sure he doesn’t mean to be harsh, but having your behavior pointed out this clearly is jarring in a way that it’s never been before.

Your eyes spring tears at his words. You love and you hate how well Remus is at reading you.

He takes your silence as the floor to continue, “They already think you’re a bad person, what’s standing up for yourself going to do? They’re not going to take the silence as anything but you being ‘difficult’, just like always.”

You choke back a sob, “But I don’t like being the bad guy. Being that is exhausting Remus and having people think that is hurtful and it’s tiring and,” you sniffle a breath in. “I just don’t want to be that anymore. Everyone else gets the benefit of the doubt besides me.”

“Dove,”

You hang up before he can say anything else and flop back onto your bed with a groan.

Your body shakes as you cry, your stuffed animals soaking up all the wet tears.

It feels horrible, having the people that mean the most to you upset with you.

At first you feel okay, ignoring your conversation with Remus in your head.

And then, your brain works up scenarios where tomorrow or tonight when he calls or if you see him- whichever happens first- he’ll say this is it.

It’s not the first nor is it the second time you’ve both had this conversation, and you imagine he’s upset having to say the same thing repeatedly only for you to ignore his words completely.

You know how tiring that is, and that makes your chest burn even more. It feels like a hot knife slicing through cold butter, this shame and this guilt that sits in your chest.

You cry some more when you realize that Remus really could break up with you, if the look of annoyance on his face had been any give away.

You fall asleep some time between crying over the argument with your siblings, the one with Remus and the anxiety-inducing idea that Remus is done with you.

The shrill ring of your phone wakes you up, and you answer without looking at the screen.

“I didn’t mean to imply that you’re a bad person, dovey.” Is the first thing out of his mouth and you feel your eyes burn with unshed tears again. “You’re not a bad person and you could never be.”

“Yeah,” your voice is groggy and hoarse as you speak. Your eyes are heavy as you blink, weighed down by all that crying. “You’re not upset with me? For being a pushover and for hanging up on you?”

Remus sighs and you wish you could see him.

He feels bad for the couple hours of your overthinking. The regret sets in his chest for a bit before it dissipates.

“Dove,” it’s a little reverent the way he says it. “We’re okay, baby. We’re always going to be okay,” you exhale shakily. “You could do horrible crimes and we’d always be okay. Tell your brain to give you a break okay? I’m not going anywhere.”

You sob softly and Remus makes a cooing sound in his throat.

“Will you come see me? Please?”

Remus chuckles his keys jingling in the background. “I’m on my way dovey, wait for me out front? On the swing set?”

“I can stay over right?” Remus laughs fully this time.

“You’re being silly. Dovey, pack two bags yeah? I’ll be ten minutes.”

#remuslupin #remus lupin #remus lupin angst #remus lupin fluff #remus lupin one shot #remus lupin drabble #remus lupin blurb #remus lupin imagine #remus lupin fanfiction #remus lupin x you #remus lupin x yn #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin x black!reader #remus lupin fic

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carowleysposts · 28 days

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Good Omens makes me feel scary things. Let’s talk about it.

So, before I start, I think it’s important to clarify that I am neurodivergent. I have autism and GO is one of my strongest hyper-fixations ever. I am so emotionally and mentally invested in it I could talk about it for days on end and every single detail of this show makes me love it more.

But there’s a really really dark flip side to this love, and I would love to see if there’s anyone else who struggles with it too:

I think I care a little too much.

Although I am aware that this is somewhat “common” for people in the spectrum and my doctors all have confirmed I am not a complete nut case for it, I almost never feel comfortable admitting to those in my life that a piece of fiction has such a strong hold on me and my mental health. And as much as I love everything we’ve seen so far, all the little things I hear and read about season three give me heart-stopping waves of anxiety that are definitely not normal.

Like, I am constantly scared of what will happen, as if it was happening to me. And I know it’s embarrassing, but my brain is simply wired differently, and it feels so awful not being able to talk about it with my friends in real life.

Sometimes I feel like my day is ruined because I read someone say that they think S3 won’t have a happy ending, or that they probably won’t kiss or end up together or something bad like that. And even though I know it’s just fiction, it gives me stomach knots, as it is such a powerful part of my life and I think about is so much.

I have even come as far as to take breaks from Tumblr and mute some words on some social media platforms so that I won’t read Neil’s responses to questions - because they ALSO make me fear terribly and give me crippling anxiety, like when he said it won’t be romantic, or when he says stuff that make me worry for the future - and won’t hear speculation or even be reminded of other stuff people say.

And before anyone asks: Yes! I am fully aware it sounds absurd. And yes, i absolutely do feel crazy and embarrassed about it, but unfortunately this is the reality of many people in the spectrum and many neurodivergent people in general.

I do work, I am a ballet teacher and an author, so of course I have many other things to worry about and do and of course I have a life full of responsibilities and relationships and different pursuits to keep me from actually thinking about it nonstop. But still, even though I am busy and distracted most of the time, every now and then these feelings and worries come and punch me in the gut, and it completely paralyzes me for long moments. I feel kinda sick? I don’t know.

So I guess what I am trying to ask is: do you guys know of anyone who feels the same? Like, is there anyone else who feels like their mind has been absolutely taken over by fiction-related anxiety? And also: what should I do about it? I feel like absolutely no other piece of fiction compares to this one, and my mind simply won’t stop.

Help pls.

#good omens #aziracrow #neil gaiman #ineffable husbands #aziraphale #crowley #gomens #angel #gomens s2 #prime video #anthony j crowley #crowleys bentley #aziraphale x crowley

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love-quinn · 25 days

Text

WOVEN TOGETHER ━━━ remus lupin x reader

━━━ 𖥻︰ 2091 words

summary: despite your best efforts, remus lupin might just become your friend.

pairing: remus lupin x reader

tags: platonic remus lupin x reader, she/her pronouns, reader is a gryffindor the same year as the marauders, shy reader, mentions of anxiety

The common room was one of your least favourite places to be, but your dorm room was worse, so there you were. It was getting late, and you had a potions assignment due the next day, so you were sitting in a quiet corner trying to work on it. Well, trying to want to work on it. You were only just passing by the skin of your teeth, and if you failed this essay then it would bring your grade down from an Acceptable to a Poor, and that meant that you wouldn’t be able to get the NEWTS you needed. You weren’t sure what those NEWTS were, as the idea of having to do anything after finishing school filled you with fear, but you figured it probably would have something to do with potions. You sort of just picked the electives you enjoyed and then did your best.

Unfortunately, your best didn’t seem to be good enough with this essay, as you had been working on it nonstop for the past four days and you still had another 10 inches of parchment left.

“Disfigurement,” a voice came from above you. You looked up from your homework at a boy, looking bashfully at your parchment.

“Excuse me?”

He had the good graces to look embarrassed by the way you were looking up at him. “Disfigurement is one of the major side affects of using lacewing flies in the potion, a big part of the reason that it’s level three restricted by the ministry,”

Now, normally, a man standing above you and explaining something that you already knew would absolutely ruin your day, Merlin only knew it happened often enough. But normally, the men doing it didn’t look like they were talking about it out of pure interest.

His eyes got slightly dimmer as he realised your annoyance, a darkened honey colour that people wrote songs about. “Sorry, I should’ve- Just because you paused writing doesn’t mean you didn’t know what you were talking about. Sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it.” You decided on after a minute. You knew who he was, of course, you didn’t spend seven years in the same grade as someone without learning their name, but you were nearly one hundred percent certain he didn’t know yours.

“I just came over for…” he gestured uselessly at the small collection of cups on the table beside you, with a metal pitcher of ice cold water that stayed full no matter how much you poured it. A group of boys in your year had tried to use it to flood the common room one time. You had a sneaking suspicion the boy in front of you had been involved, despite the fact that he never received detention for it like the others did.

“Go for it.”

He poured two glasses of water and paused, looking at you. “I really am sorry. I’ve offended you.”

“I’m not offended,” you replied honestly. “I normally would be, but I’ll allow it just this once.”

The boy cracked a smile, slightly crooked, and it evened out his whole face, as though he had been created just to smile like that. “Thank you, then.” He corrected softly. “For not being offended by my interruption.” He put the cups down gently and looked for a moment as though he might shake your hand, before thinking better of it and leaving them hanging uselessly by his side. “I’m Remus.”

“So I’ve heard,” you didn’t mean to sound pretentious. “I just mean- we share a lot of classes, so I’ve seen you around a lot.” Now it was your turn to be embarrassed.

Remus continued smiling. “No, I know. I see you all the time. You always snag the good table in the library.” He gestured to you, testing your name out experimentally on his tongue, as though afraid to get it wrong. You nodded.

You liked studying in the library because it made you feel like an actual student. Doing homework on your bed, while the more common alternative, made you feel as though you were doing it wrong somehow. As if, because you hadn’t put in the effort to go all the way to the library and bring your study materials with you that you didn’t deserve to do well on whatever it is you were working on. “Do I?” your voice sounded far away, even to yourself.

“I’ll forgive you, though,” Remus said good naturedly, noticing your change in tone. This interaction had gone on far too long for your liking. You were beginning to feel exhausted. How embarrassing.

Talking to strangers for longer than ten seconds makes my stomach do a backflip, you thought bitterly to yourself. That was why your dorm room didn’t feel as welcoming as it was perhaps meant to. The girls in there talked, like they were friends. And they were friends, it was easy to see that.

You’d been so removed when you first started at Hogwarts, when you were only eleven. So overwhelmed by the hundreds of rooms and the hundreds of students, that when your roommates stayed up all night chattering and getting to know one another, you had felt nothing inside you aside from a desire to go to sleep. It took weeks before your nerves calmed enough to even attempt to contribute to their conversations, and by the time you had realised that maybe you did want to be friends with them, they had accepted your silence.

You gave Remus an awkward smile, the polar opposite of the one he’d given you. As if your grinning was a defect, not something you were designed to do. Sometimes it felt like maybe you weren’t.

He was still standing there. How could you make him go away without explicitly telling him to? You felt nauseous, squirmy under his gaze. Why hadn’t he left yet? “That essay Slughorn gave us is a real doozy, isn’t it?”

You cracked a real, genuine smile at his word choice. You didn’t know anyone who used the word ‘doozy’ and the best part was, it seemed to be entirely unironic. “Yeah, I guess.”

“I was planning on spending the afternoon up in the library, working on it.” His hand fiddled with the hem of his button-up. “Any chance I could sit at the good table?”

You nodded almost instantly. “Yeah, no, sure. It’s all yours. Sorry, I didn’t mean to hog.”

“You’re not,” he let out a breathy laugh. “You’re jumpy, aren’t you?” You felt it, and your cheeks burned at the notion that he could tell. “If you wanted to still study at your same table, and I was also to study there, both of us in complete silence, then I don’t think that would be so bad?”

Remus could see that you wanted to say no, and he didn’t want to push it if you were clearly uninterested, but he also knew that it had been seven years of you being the only Gryffindor girl he’d never spoken to, and also being the only Gryffindor girl he’d ever felt a strong desire to speak to. The others were great, sure, Lily and Marlene had become friends to him more concretely now that Lily and James were seeing each other, and Alice had always been sweet. You, on the other hand, had been described by your roommates as sad. Not ‘pathetic’ sad, but a more deep sadness.

“She’s awfully kind,” Marlene had told him once, hushed in the back of a History Against Magic Lesson. He hadn’t remembered how your name had been brought up. “Think she just likes it quiet.”

“The table’s yours,” you offered. “It’s okay. I can just study down here, it’s warmer.”

“It’s louder, though,” Remus reasoned. “Up there there’s no… well, no guys coming over here to explain something you probably already understand.”

“I thought you said you were going to be there?” You were genuinely confused at what he was asking of you by this point, but he laughed it off. You staved off a frown.

“I always find that homework is nicest when you’ve got someone there,” he offered finally. “Even if you’re not talking, just purely sitting there.”

You didn’t see how that would help at all. You’d probably be too distracted by anyone to even get any work done. But, you realised with a start, the notion of someone wanting to spend time in your vicinity, as innocent as Remus’s intentions were, made your heart ache.

He probably just wanted to be able to sit at the good table without putting you rout, you understood that. But at the same time, if he really wanted to sit there, and he really wanted to not disrupt your routine, then you didn’t see why not, even though maintaining eye contact with him for any longer than a second felt as though you were going to combust in a caramel-irised explosion.

“You can come,” you conceded, gently, hoping as not to come off rude or too territorial about your space. Perhaps it would be better if you studied outside, or in an empty classroom. That way you weren’t getting in his way.

“Excellent,” he was talking too loud, and he could tell that by the way you shrank back in your seat. “Maybe I can finally get my transfiguration grade up, Merlin knows you’re doing well in that class.”

Why would he say that? That made him come across as a stalker who knew all your grades. He hoped you didn’t think that implied you did need help in potions. Your reactions weren’t giving him much, and it was making him nervous. He definitely shouldn’t have come over here, but he had been scrambling for something to say, and now he had to take water over despite the fact that no one had asked for water.

“I’m sure you’ll be fine.” You closed your textbook so gently it didn’t even made a paper noise as the cover closed. “But if you really do need help, then I might be able to.” You offered him one final smile, cheeks tinged with a visible blush.

You hoped he couldn’t see how dizzy you were getting. You wanted to go sleep and pretend this was all a dream so you could go back to ignoring Remus’s existence like he could go back to ignoring yours.

Unfortunately for you, though, he’d found your little hidey-hole study space that you occupied yesterday, coming in to tease you light heartedly about abandoning him for transfiguration. You didn’t not want to talk to Remus, it was nothing about him. He’d been nothing but sweet and funny in the very limited interactions you’d shared, you were the issue.

“Should’ve known you’d ditch me,” he’d said with a sigh as he sat down, opening his textbook up. You found you didn’t mind his being there as long as you weren’t expected to contribute much to the conversation.

“Thought it would be obvious.” You’d attempted to match his airiness in your tone. It came out strangled.

He sighed gently. “I wanted to pretend it wasn’t so, sweetheart. I thought you and me had something special. I told you about disfigurement in potions and you tell me about disfigurement in transfiguration.”

He’d been attempting to do the spell for about an hour, trying to turn a ball of yarn into a scarf. It was a simple spell that’d normally be of no issue to him, but he just couldn’t get it this time.

After nearly forty minutes of mumbling all but silently to himself so as not to disturb you, you had enough. You reached over and, so delicately he’d thought at first it was simply a breeze, uttered the spell while controlling his hand movements. A long, thickly knitted navy scarf burst from the ball of wool, landing pooled by his crossed legs. You looked up at him, expecting to be reprimanded for the touching, knowing you would have done exactly the same.

“You’re not real,” he said after a moment. Sometimes you felt that way too. “We’re officially studying together every time, now.” He grinned to himself, picking up the scarf and wrapping it securely around your neck multiple times, tucking the ends in to your jumper. It was soft. “Every single time, you little wonder.” You maybe didn’t mind as much this time as you had when he’d last suggested it. Your smile was almost hidden behind the mass of fabric you’d just helped him conjure, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t see it.

#remus lupin x reader #remus lupin #remus lupin fic #remus x reader

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