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sunlightmurdock · 2 years

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Trouble in Paradise | 1.2 | Bradley Bradshaw x Reader

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Synopsis: After the most painful break-up of his life, Rooster is stationed in Hawaii for the next six months. Alone, away from home and hurting, he finds comfort in the arms of a stranger.

Warnings: no use of y/n, age gap (rooster is in his mid-30s, reader is in her early 20s), angst angst angst angst angst, kind of all comes to a head in this one. **There is very brief mention of vomiting in the paragraph beginning with ‘you’re hungover’ and in the two following paragraphs!!** Other than that, there’s some yelling and arguing and angsttttt

…

“Jacob Michael Seresin. Did. You. Know?”

Jake should have known this was somehow going to blow back on him. He just came out here to do a job, which is what he has been doing. He’s been being a good boyfriend: going to work, doing all the overtime they’ll allow him to do, going to the gym and making sure his butt stays exactly the way that Chloe likes it, taking in the sights. Most importantly, not fucking a borderline teenager. And yet, he’s the one in trouble.

“Baby, it wasn’t my place to say anything — I’ve been trying to get him to ‘fess up!” Jake sighs softly. He’s in the gym on base, leaning on the weight rack. It’s 0600, he doesn’t have to be in Admiral Bates’ office for another hour — the gym is pretty empty at this time of day because most people are either already working or don’t have to work until much later.

Jake’s sweating out his margarita hangover.

“Jake, I can’t believe you wouldn’t tell me! We tell each other everything! — I told you about Amy’s thing.”

Jake sighs softly. It was pretty juicy. This is one of the reasons that he knows Chloe’s his soulmate, they each love to talk shit about people just as much as the other. Turns out that Amy’s boss, who Rooster had always hated and insisted was trying to fuck Amy — actually was trying to fuck Amy.

They had been late at the office one night a few weeks ago and he had stuck his tongue down her throat. She, of course, had smacked the crap out of him and reported him to HR. But it was an absolutely code red that Rooster could not know about it — he would freak out. Well, they had thought he would. Turns out, his behaviour had been much worse.

“I know we do, honey. I wanted to tell you so bad, I promise — I was just trying to make him pull his head out of his ass and tell Amy. I didn’t think it was right that she found out from someone else.”

“Well, she found out in a much worse way!” Chloe whispers. She’s sitting in the living room of Amy and Rooster’s apartment whilst Amy sons in the bathroom.

Jake scrunches his brows. When the phone call had started with an abrupt ‘Amy knows everything’ eight minutes ago, Jake had known this was going to be bad. Catastrophic, even. He’s beginning to worry exactly how bad this may be.

“What? — Rooster didn’t tell her?” Jake has to remind himself to keep his voice down. The gym is quieter than usual but this is still a Naval Base, there’s a couple other guys in there with him. Jake opts for grabbing his water bottle and heading to the locker room instead. Ab day can hold on, it’s not like his are going to disappear overnight.

“Are you kidding? No, it’s so much worse!” Chloe’s still whispering. Amy can’t hear her either way, she’s in the bathroom on the other side of the apartment and she’s crying too hard to hear anything. Chloe was with her until Amy begged her to just leave. Leaving isn’t an option, so Chloe decided to just give her some space until she cools off enough to be comforted.

“What happened?” Jake holds his phone between his ear and his shoulder as he empties his towel and uniform from his locker. He’ll shower in his room instead of here.

“Amy called him last night. He didn’t pick up the first time, so she called again. Carter’s doing way better and she wanted to let him now.”

Jake presses a hand over his mouth as he paces back to his room. He’s praying that he doesn’t run into anyone right now that could interrupt him from hearing this.

“So she calls him again. He must’ve answered the phone accidentally while it was in his pocket or somethin—“

“No!” Jake gasps. He makes eye contact with a Captain and smiles awkwardly, politely, and then continues on his way.

“Yes!” Chloe cries back, just as horrified as Jake is. “He was fucking this girl — Amy heard everything. Moaning, kissing, dirty talk — everything.”

“What kind of dirty talk?” Even Jake isn’t sure why he asks it at first.

“Jake. Really? — Why would that matter?”

“She calls him daddy, doesn’t she?” Jake is a middle-schooler at heart. Luckily, Chloe loves him in spite of this.

“Yes. Also, how old is this girl? — Amy said she sounded very… energetic.”

Jake wishes he could laugh at this. If it wasn’t one of his mutual friends being put through severe emotional duress by his other mutual friend, maybe he would have laughed. He knew Bradshaw was a dirty boy, deep down. Bradley never talks about sex with Jake. For good reason.

“Like twenty-three at an absolute maximum. Twenty-one at a minimum. I’m not sure. I did see her waving an ID around so she’s not a minor.”

“Always a bonus.” Chloe scoffs, pinching the bridge of her nose. This time, Jake does chuckle. He slots his key into the door to his room and ducks safely inside, where he can put her on loud speaker.

“Christ, Rooster. What the fuck is he thinking?” Chloe shakes her head.

“She is a good kid. She doesn’t know about Amy.” Jake explains. He doesn’t know why he feels the need to defend you — and he wouldn’t defend you if it took any kind of real effort. He wouldn’t dream of defending your name in front of Amy. But he feels the need to let Chloe know that you aren’t just some little slut who did this on purpose.

“Oh shit.” Chloe breathes out. “Wait, you’ve met her?”

Jake cringes. He pauses for a moment to think of the answer that will get him in the least amount of shit. “Yes. But only a couple of times. Rooster tried hiding her, but we ran into her and her friends in this bar. It’s not that big of an island, I’ve seen her around since.”

“Is she pretty?”

Jake smiles. “Not as pretty as you, honey.”

“Cut the shit, Seresin.” Chloe smiles back. “I want to know if this girl is hot.”

“Oh, in that case — fuck yeah. You should’ve seen what she turned up to the civillian barbecue in last night. Every guy in there was like…” Jake stops to make a face. Even though they both know that Chloe can’t see him, they both know exactly what face he’s making. “I have no idea what she’s doing with Rooster.”

“Damn. Amy’s like…”

“Oh yeah, how is she doing?” Jake remembers after he derailed the conversation with Bradley’s daddy issues.

“Not good. I only stopped by this morning to bring back her blender but it’s a good thing I did. She’s been up all night, she fucked up her hand really bad — punched through this big photo of him proposing.”

Rooster’s sitting in Admiral Bates’ office in his khakis. He hates this uniform. His flightsuit fits well, it’s comfy — it’s like wearing pyjamas to work. His khakis are too tight around his biceps, they’re uncomfortable and the crotch is too tight — the material pinches when he sits. It’s clear that he’s uncomfy. He’s been fidgeting since he sat down.

He’s in trouble. Well, not in a kid in detention way — but in the Navy equivalent to that. Rooster isn’t stupid, he knows that he hasn’t exactly been focused on his work recently. This is his return to work meeting after his period of absence last week to go to Virginia. Not to mention the “sickness” before that to take you to the hospital.

The point of this meeting is very simple. Admiral Bates just dances around the point. Takes around twenty minutes to get to it. Doesn’t want to be too harsh, to be too mean about it — he feels like a good kid like Bradley doesn’t deserve that.

Ultimately: Rooster needs to get his shit together before the end of his deployment. The next few weeks are where things get serious. There are deadlines, thresholds — Rooster needs to get serious about meeting them.

“You understand why I’m concerned about your performance, don’t you, Lieutenant Bradshaw?” Admiral Bates is a nice guy, Rooster likes him enough. He’s delicate about the way he approaches this situation. Rooster doesn’t feel insulted by the question, he understands that he hasn’t been as engaged as he should be.

“Yes, Sir.”

Bates nods. “You seem like a good kid. I want this to work out for you, but I need to you get your head out of the clouds, alright? — These next few weeks are critical and I need your attention to be in the right place. Can you do that for me?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Alright.” Bates gives a final, curt nod. “Look, I just want you to know that whatever you’ve got going on at home… I don’t mean to be harsh, but you can’t bring it to work with you. I need you kids up their with clear heads, doing what I’m telling you to do. You understand?”

“Yes, Sir. I understand.” Bradley agrees pliantly.

“That being said: if you do ever need to talk to anyone, son, I’m here.” It’s this sentence that rubs Rooster the wrong way. Bates knows that it has because Bradley finally stops fucking fidgeting. He sits still in that tiny wooden chair and stares straight ahead at the Admiral. It isn’t Bates’ fault. He just sounds too much like Maverick when he says it.

Rooster hasn’t thought about Maverick in weeks. The sudden resurgence of this thought just makes Rooster feel guilty. He knows that Mav would be disappointed to hear of the mess that Bradley has gotten himself into. He’s always disappointed when Rooster does something that Goose wouldn’t have.

Rooster wonders sometimes if he can ever be enough like his father to actually make Maverick happy.

“Thank you, Sir.” Rooster answers numbly.

“Alright. I’ll see you out there.”

Rooster already has that stupid khaki shirt unbuttoned, pulled out from his belt and shrugged off of his shoulders before he has made it back to his room. It’s against the rules to walk around base in such a state of undress, but he doesn’t care too much.

Jake’s door opens at the same time Rooster does. Jake steps out as Rooster’s about to step in. He’s wearing his flightsuit and has his phone pressed between his shoulder and ear. He’s waiting for the person on the phone to finish talking.

“Hey.” Rooster nods politely. He feels like it’s the least he can do as he examines the now yellowed bruise around Hangman’s eye socket. He knows it��s sore by the way Jake’s eye is closed just a fraction more than the one on the other side. Rooster’s eye is healing better — it’s just a faint purple now, not noticeable in most lights, and it doesn’t hurt much.

“One second, honey.” Jake murmurs affectionately into the phone, wrapping his hand around it and taking it from his ear as he turns his full attention to Rooster. He shakes his head. “Look, not to say I told you so, but I told you you should have come clean, dude.”

Rooster’s heart sinks. He knows that Chloe’s on the other end of that line. He knows that she’s probably with Amy. He knows that his whole world and each fucked up white lie that is holding it together is about to explode and take him with it.

“What?” Rooster asks. He hopes that Jake will reassure him that this isn’t what he thinks it is. He hopes that he just has a little longer. A few more days with you. Just a while more before he has to let go.

“You should call your girl.” Jake waves Rooster off. He swings the door to his room shut, lifts the phone to his ear again and sets off down the hallway without another word. Leaves Rooster to wonder which girl he means.

Rooster regrets that. He stands there in the doorway and feels sick with himself for a few moments. He truly doesn’t know which one Jake wants him to call. He decides on Amy first.

She doesn’t answer. Rooster calls her six times in a row. It’s then, whilst he’s sitting on the floor in his room, with those fucking khakis digging into his thighs in the worst way, that he notices a discrepancy in his call log.

Right before his calls to her today. After the two missed calls from her last night. After the voicemail she left him at 9:35. An eleven minute call. Like, one that he answered. An open line of communication from his phone to hers, for eleven minutes, last night. Beginning at 9:41pm.

Now, Rooster wasn’t wearing a watch last night. He doesn’t know exactly what time it was when he was hauling you into the bathroom and pressing your back to the door. But, if he had to guess, he would say that it was around that time. The two missed calls confirm his suspicions.

There’s this blinding anger that fills him.

He thinks back to telling you to forget it. His mind reels as he tries to process how this could have happened. He’s never accidentally answered a call in his life. That’s when it occurs to him that his phone wasn’t even in his pocket. It was on the counter. There’s no way he picked up on accident.

He might be a fuck up, but he isn’t an idiot. Rooster knows. He stands there at first, frozen in place, staring at his phone like if he tries hard enough then he can will that stupid number into disappearing. To will that stupid call into never happening.

Eleven whole minutes. She knows. Rooster knows that she knows. It makes him sick to think of what she heard. He knows that she’s probably a wreck right now. He knows what you did.

Rooster has always had a temper. Emotional regulation has never been his strong suit. After twenty years of different therapists, Rooster now feels confident enough to say that this stems from the fact that his earliest memories are of his mother crying so hard she blacks out. Dozens of these memories, time after time, her screaming and sobbing, stroking his hair, thinking he was too small to remember.

He wasn’t too small to remember, just too small to understand. Too small to understand that it’s not normal to let things build until they take you over completely.

He doesn’t even feel his fingers curling around his phone until he’s already lifting it. He doesn’t have the capacity to stop himself until it’s already too late and the stupid possession is hurtling towards the white brick wall of his navy issued room.

The screen splits and the phone all but crumples. Rooster doesn’t feel any better after it, but there’s a sense of release in the fact that it happened.

You’re hungover. Violently hungover. You’re actually in a very similar position to Amy. Sitting on the bathroom floor in one of Rooster’s t-shirts, sniffling and wiping your eyes. Only, yours is because you’ve been dry heaving over the toilet for thirty minutes. Her sniffling is because she just lost the love of her life in an eleven minute phone call.

“Wait, wait, wait… so — I’m sorry,” Ella and Kit are both sitting cross legged in the doorway. Close enough to offer moral support but far enough away to not have a front row experience to your tequila regret. “You actually thought it was a good idea to answer that phone?”

“I was doing what Kit said!” You sniffle, wiping the makeup residue from under your eyes.

“I never said make his fiancée listen to him fucking you.” Kit answers quickly. “But I am impressed that you did it.”

Ella kicks her ankle, shooting her a stern look.

“Rooster’s going to kill you.” Ella announces. Like you don’t already know. You groan, resting your elbow on the toilet as you take a deep breath. The warm morning air is making everything a million times worse. You might as well be in hell already, with all this guilt and heat.

“I mean, if he isn’t with her, then he’ll get over it.” Kit shrugs. You and Ella both turn to look at her together. You squint slightly at her.

“If he isn’t?”

“We all know there’s a possibility he’s still with this girl, right?” Kit answers. You do all know that. It’s still offensive that she says it. You push your leg out from where it’s tucked under you, kicking the door until it swings shut in their faces.

It’s not mature but you don’t care. They should be grateful because the moment the door’s shut, another wave of nausea hits you. Kit winces at the sound of you retching from behind the door.

It hurts to know that they both think exactly what you think. It makes you feel so ridiculous, to have not realised this all sooner.

Ella glares at Kit. She had said that finishing the bottle of tequila after the three of you came home last night was a bad idea. But you were so sad. You needed a pick-me-up and you needed your friends. They were happy to be with you for both. All three of you are paying the price now.

“I’m gonna get her some water.” Ella decides. She stands up and heads for the kitchen. Kit yawns and leans her head back against the now closed bathroom door.

It’s the moment that Ella’s no longer in view that someone starts thundering at the door hard enough to make Kit leap to her feet. Also violently hungover, she has to grab the wall to steady herself as she battles vertigo and the urge to kill whoever thinks that’s an appropriate way to knock on a door before 8am.

She groans and crosses to the end of the hall, pulling off the chain and tugging the door open, ready to silence the person on the other side.

“Where is she?”

“Throwing up.” Kit answers back with maybe a little too much attitude. Rooster’s face is serious as ever. He’s wearing shorts and a white shirt, his fist is curled around the door frame like he wants to punch a hole in it.

“Why’s she throwing up?” Rooster’s blunt with it. His face remains firm, stern. There’s a sharpness to his tone that makes Kit immediately stand up a little straighter.

One thing that Rooster has yet to learn about Kit — the reason why she is routinely fired from jobs, is that she doesn’t do well with men getting in her face. She likes to put them in their place.

“Maybe you should have worn a condom.”

Rooster immediately pales. Kit considers for a moment that that may have been too far, because he looks like he’s about to puke on her socks. His hand curls tighter around the doorframe. She can practically see him searching for the right words. And trying not to collapse at her feet.

“I’m kidding. She’s fighting half a bottle of tequila.” Kit grumbles. The colour instantly returns to his skin. But he looks even more angry now. He opens his mouth, like he’s going to yell, but then closes it again and takes a deep breath. He prepares to tell her to just go in there and get you before he loses it.

Kit steps tiredly to the side and out of his way. Rooster lingers in the doorway for a moment. Standing there on the porch. Looking in at that narrow-ass hallway and wondering if he can stand to be in such a confined space right now.

While he’s still making up his mind, the bathroom door unlocks and you pull it halfway open, leaning your top half out to check who the hell was trying to break your front door down.

It’s painful, meeting his gaze. He looks so betrayed. It all clicks into place for you all at once. Deep down, you had known that answering that call would give you the answers you needed. That it would hurt him. Because he loved her.

“What the fuck did you do?” He shocks himself. Kit flinches at the volume of Rooster’s voice. She immediately steps in front of him like that could really stop him from coming inside if he wanted to.

Your jaw drops. Might as well have hit the floor. If it had, at least it would be hanging out in the same vicinity of your heart right now. You aren’t sure if it drops because you’re surprised that this is how he chooses to tell you that he’s a lying cheater, or if it drops because of how furious he is.

You’re stuck in place, suspended in time, thinking of that day that you got caught in the rain on the beach. When he told you why he and Amy had broken up. You question the truth behind that tale now. They had broken up because of all of the arguments they had had — because of him being an asshole. Had you ever considered being less of an asshole to her? You had asked.

You wonder if he yelled at her like this. If he hurt her before like you’re hurting now. If she has felt a fraction of the sheer devastation that just hit you then you regret ever having any part in adding to her pain.

You could have pried more. Could have listened to him less. Could have saw the signs. If you had really wanted to. You could have messaged her. Asked her ‘… Hey, is this guy yours? Because I’ve been fucking him for almost half a year now.’

He was with her the entire time. Part of you knew it last night when you answered that call. Part of you knew it last week when he had to go back to Virginia. All of you, your entire being, had wanted those small parts of you to be wrong.

“Do you have any idea what you just fucking did?” Rooster’s still in the doorway. He’s yelling. You know your neighbours will be wandering out onto their porches any minute now to check what’s going on. If he carries on yelling, you know that someone will call the cops.

When he feels like this, Rooster recalls the therapy he went to when he was younger. It started off as grief counselling when he first struggled to fit in in Kindergarten. His dad was already gone and his mom didn’t understand why he was such an angry little boy at school, when he was so sweet at home. Grief counselling became anger management became grief counselling. All different kinds of therapy. Same shit.

Usually he’ll try to calm himself. Or Amy will try to calm him. Right now, he’s seething. His future is gone and you’re just staring at him like you had no part in it.

You just stand there. In Captain America pyjama shorts and the tiniest black tank top that Rooster has ever seen.

He presses a hand over his mouth and lets out a hard breath. You look really young. Standing there in your pyjamas. Ella’s lingering in the doorway to the kitchen, shocked by Rooster’s behaviour. Kit’s standing right in front of him like she could square up if she needed too. You look like such a kid.

He scoffs softly and takes a step back, shaking his head. What a fucking idiot he has been. Here he is, on the wrong side of his thirties, in the wrong state, with the wrong fucking girl.

“What the fuck is the matter with you? — Say something!” Through those sad brown eyes that you had wanted so desperately to see, you have just ruined his life. You can see that he truly believes that in the way that he’s looking at you. There’s solely blame there now.

If there’s an ounce of guilt for the part he has made you play in this, you don’t recognise it in his features. He forgets that there isn’t exactly an other woman here. He’s had both you and Amy playing that role for four months. Neither one of you is really his, he’s never really been yours. And for him, that’s somehow all your fault.

“Fuck you, you should go.” Kit steps forward and narrows her eyes at him. He doesn’t even look at her. His eyes are still on you. You don’t realise there are tears in your eyes until one spills out, heavy and warm against your cheek.

“Do you have any idea what you just fucking did?” Rooster yells past her. Does he? He doesn’t know much about what you’ve been through, much about the hurt that came before him. Primarily because you didn’t want him to know.

You aren’t the sad little girl that you used to be. You’ve worked so hard to be happy, to surround yourself with people who love you and to put yourself in a place where you are safe and loved. To learn to trust all over again. He’ll never know how hard it was for you to let yourself fall, and how low you’ve tumbled now.

He’ll probably never understand just what he has done. You stand there and wonder. Kit pushes at his chest but ultimately does little to sway him.

You lift your hand and wipe hurriedly at your cheeks, stepping out one more hesitant pace into the hall. Not hidden behind any doors or shadows. Standing as proud as you can, when there are a thousand things trying to bring you to your knees right know — that fucking tequila being one of them — and you let out a soft breath.

He won’t hear your voice crack. You swallow before you speak. You’re so much calmer than he is. You clear your throat and breathe in slowly, air filling your lungs like it’ll stand in for the confidence you’re trying to muster.

“I hope she doesn’t leave you.” Rooster’s anger dissipates for just a moment, long enough to scrunch his brows and for you to see confusion hit him.

Kit turns to look, even more confused than Rooster is. What do you mean you hope she doesn’t leave him? — He deserves to be alone for the rest of his miserable life!

You’re so calm in the way that you speak to him. For a moment, he feels like the childish one. Bradley realises how ridiculous he is. A grown man standing on your porch, bawling and screaming like a little kid. He thinks for a moment that you’re wishing him well.

You don’t have it in you to leave him with that kind of optimism. You swallow once more, and then breathe out the last words you hope that he’ll ever hear you say.

“I hope you have to look at her every day for the rest of your fucking life and know that she hates you as much as I do.”

Kit, no longer confused and now on board with your plan, swings the door shut and bolts it quickly. Just in case he decides to change his mind and kick the door down.

Rooster stands there for a moment and looks at the wrong side of the closed door. All those years of grief counselling, then anger management, then grief counselling. All of those years of scribbling in colouring books while someone tries to figure out just what’s wrong with him.

He grabs the closest thing to him. It’s a porch light that’s resting on the wooden railing around the porch. He picks it up and hurls it back down to the ground with enough force to send it shattering into a million pieces, cascading across the faded wood decking and onto the grass below.

…

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#bradley rooster bradshaw #bradley bradshaw #miles teller #bradley bradshaw smut #rooster x you #trouble in paradise #rooster bradshaw imagine #top gun smut

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h3rmitsunited · 1 year

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Has someone come up with the Steddie Sky High AU concept yet, because I started thinking about it and like it’s creating a beautiful fucking picture in my brain and now I need to ramble about the idea for a few paragraphs

If you’ve seen Sky High, it’s this Disney movie about this kid that has famous superhero parents and all this pressure to be a super amazing hero because of who they are and he goes to superhero high school and blah blah. Fun silly movie.

Anyways.

Steve, right? Obviously would be the main character, with some changes. Parents are still big famous superheroes, and like in ST, they are gone a lot because they’re big superheroes and because Steve is… well, he’s not special. Like Will in the movie, he doesn’t have powers when he goes to Sky High (so he thinks), and his parents have tried to get by, have pushed, gotten him tested and put through things to try to activate his powers, but nothing. He’s just Steve, but he’s still Steve Harrington, son of the most famous heroes in the world, so he’s got cred from that when he goes to Sky High, and it’s not like his parents have spread the word that he’s powerless, so people don’t really know, until he gets there and they put him through the like sorting test and he has to say he has no powers, and is stuck in the sidekick track. It’s humiliating, but at least his parents aren’t home to look at him like the disappointment he feels like. He’s mocked at school by some of the dickier heroes, but he finds he actually likes the sidekick track, that he likes taking this supportive role and he’s really encouraging to the friends he makes in those classes, even supporting the other sidekicks to feel more like heroes.

And Eddie, he’d be Warren Peace, the son of a supervillain that Will’s parents put away in the movie. Eddie, like in Stranger Things is treated like he’s already a villain, sticking out because of who he is and how he presents himself. He has fire powers like Warren, except he struggles to control it and when he uses his powers they tend to get dangerous really fast, so he’s restricted from using his powers at school. He isolates himself a lot because of that, because people think he’s just going to end up a villain like his father, but he’s actually kind and scared and just wants to make some friends without people acting like he’s this big scary asshole.

He also has a big fucking crush on Steve Harrington.

Things happen and they maybe get egged into a fight like in the movie, Steve learns more about Eddie, Eddie learns more about Steve. Steve helps Eddie realize that using music can help him with control his powers, so that he can use it without hurting people and Eddie tells him he thinks that must be his superpower, helping people be better, because he’s seen how Steve is with his friends, and how even though he doesn’t have powers, he puts himself in the way to protect them and stand up for them.

They end up getting together, and things are better and good and happy.

Until they’re not.

Eddie’s dad breaks out of prison. Steve’s parents come back. Shocker, they’re not fans of their powerless disappointing son dating a boy and the son of their sworn enemy who just broke out of prison. Upset, Steve runs from home, straight into getting kidnapped by Eddie’s dad, who holds him hostage to try to get Steve’s parents to surrender to him.

They don’t come for him.

Eddie’s dad escalates the threats. He’s going to kill Steve if they don’t give him what he wants.

Steve’s parents don’t come.

Eddie does though. He fights for Steve, fights his father, but the emotional stress of the situation makes it harder and harder for Eddie to maintain control of his powers and as Eddie is struggling to land the final blow, Steve gets caught in the crossfire.

Bad.

Eddie’s dad is down. And so is Steve.

He dies.

Eddie is heartbroken, and holding him

And Steve starts breathing again.

Shocking reveal. Steve does have a power. He can’t die. But he’s also really supportive to his friends, so like really, what’s the real superpower?

Then Eddie brings Steve back to meet his loving and supportive uncle who adopts him after seeing how big of assholes Steve’s parents are and then they live happily ever after being superpower boyfriends.

And like yeah, the other cast of characters would be in there too, I just haven’t thought that far okay?

#steddie #stranger things #steve Harrington #Eddie Munson #sky high #sky High au #if someone has done this already i promise i didn’t steal it and also i would like to read or see the other ones too #you know two cakes and all that

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ozwriterchick · 9 months

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Swimming Lessons

Characters: Dad!Bucky; OFC!Reader; OFC!Little

Content warnings: None, just some fluff

A/Note: This is my first post back since some health concerns in June/July. I've put off going back to writing but I'm hoping this serves as my reintroduction and to my mojo being back!

This story idea came to me at the gym last week. It kinda got away from me, to the point that the last paragraph is really the crux of what the story was going to be.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy, let me know your thoughts and don't forget to like/reblog.

Dividers by: @firefly-graphics

Masterlist

In the 7 years since you came to live at the compound with the Avengers, a lot had changed for you. Not just professionally, but personally as well.

Professionally, you’d risen to a management role with your team, which had you assisting and overseeing mission planning and comms. The team really respect ted you and your skills and appreciated your assistance in helping them out of tight spots on occasion. You thoroughly enjoyed your job and having such close friendships with most of the team.

Personally, you’d met the love of your life, dated for 3 years and have now been married for 3 years. You and Bucky had danced around your attraction for about 6 months before he asked you out after Sam pushed him one day by saying that if he didn’t ask you out, someone else would snap you up.

At the same time, Natasha and Wanda were giving you the same speech about Bucky. You still insist it was the best thing you and he ever did.

Your first date went so well, you two were practically inseparable from that day on. Dinners, coffee, breakfast, move nights, you name it the two of you were together.

Seeing him off on missions was hard, but being able to be on comms helped, because you could hear everything happening and it put your mind at ease, most of the time.

The biggest change, for both you and Bucky, came about 21 months ago when your son was born. Neither of you planned to have kids so soon, but a bout of the flu not long after you got married, rendered your contraceptive pill less effective that month and before you knew it, a little nugget was on the way.

That’s how Bucky christened the new life when he first found out. He was nervous that he wouldn’t be a good father, but you tried to assure him that by even being concerned about that proved already that he would be a great father. Those weren’t just words to you, you truly believed he would be the best father possible and you were so grateful he was going to be the father of your child (or children).

Your pregnancy went smoothly and thankfully Noah was a very placid baby who rarely cried, slept through the night from about 4 months old and just generally enchanted anyone who met him.

His big blue eyes sparkled and his dark hair, so much like his father, was longer than a normal toddler his age. You’d constantly be stopped in the park or on the street by people he grinned at who just wanted to compliment you on such a gorgeous baby. You had to agree, you and Bucky made a good looking baby.

You didn’t think you could fall any more in love with your husband, but seeing him being a father definitely did it. The way he looked after Noah and was so protective of both of you mad you want to have a whole tribe with him. He didn’t know it but the wasn’t totally out of the question.

One night at the dinner table as you were both watching him try and feed himself spaghetti, you turned to Bucky “Hey Buck, what do you think about swimming lessons?”

“Umm, sugar, I don’t know how to break this to you, but I know how to swim” he smirked at you.

He winced, dramatically, as you slapped his arm “Not for you doofus” you laughed at him “for Noah. We have a pool here at the compound and I know we’ve taken him in the water more than once, but I really want him to have water confidence just in case something happens and neither of us are there.”

“That sounds like a great idea my love. How about you look into it and let me know what you find? Now, do you want to bath the nugget or do the dishes?” He asked as he kissed you on your forehead, before gathering the dishes and taking them to the sink.

Later that night, you’re sitting in bed with your laptop in front of you, looking up local swim schools for toddlers. Noah was fast asleep in his new big boy bed, which he’d been so excited about when he saw Bucky putting it together. You smiled at the baby monitor, which had video as well as sound, nothing but the best for your baby boy.

All of a sudden you feel like you’re being watched and you look up to see Bucky leaning against the bedroom door frame, just watching you with a silly grin on his face. “What? Do I have something on my face?” you asked him.

“No my sweet girl, just appreciating your beauty and how lucky I am” he said moving to your side on the bed and kissing your temple. “What are you up to?”

“Just researching local swim schools. There are a couple in the area that have really great reviews. Maybe we can go visit them with Noah on the weekend?”

“Sounds like a plan” Bucky said, moving the computer off your lap and onto the bedside table. “Can I interest you in a different kind of research right now?”

Saturday came faster than expected. You had called both of the swim schools and schedule meetups for you, Bucky and Noah to tour and get to know the staff there, also observing one of the toddler classes.

The first school was called The Swimming Station. The director, Blanche Lee was an older lady, from the deep south who had moved to New York many years ago, but seemed to have retained her Southern accent. She greeted the 3 of you and paid attention to Noah who charmed her as was his usual M.O. After the tour, which you and Bucky were both impressed by, she handed you paperwork to fill out if you decide to join. She then introduced you to the teacher whose class Noah would be joining, who invited both of you to sit poolside to observe the class that Noah would be in.

As you got in the car after leaving The Swimming Station, your husband bucked Noah into his car seat and then slid into his seat behind the wheel. “So, what did you think?” He asked.

“I thought it was great, everyone was so nice, and they all treated Noah so well”

“But…?”

“I don’t know, let’s just go see the other one and then we can make our decision from there.”

Bucky put the car in drive and headed towards the 2nd swim school, Tiny Fin Aquatics. You liked the sound of that, also they were specifically designed for kids under 10 and that they had a sister-school called Big Fin Aquatics that the kids would graduate to, once they were old enough. It was a newer school than the last one and it had better reviews.

Driving up and parking out the front, you were even more impressed with the place. It was so bright and shiny and all the parents you saw turning up had big smiles on their faces.

Entering the school, you were met by the Director, Anthony Cooper. You’re not sure why you were surprised the director was a man, but you liked the vibe he exuded and when you looked at Bucky, with Noah on his hip, he nodded in agreement.

After going over costs and associated paperwork, Anthony took you both on a tour and introduced you to Noah’s instructor. You had a few minutes of conversation and then headed poolside to watch the class. Noah was eager to get into the water after being at the last school and then having his parents rip him away before he could get in the pool.

Bucky leaned over and whispered that you should have brought all of your swimsuits so he could have a quick swim. You promised that you’d be able to do that once you were home.

The class looked like it went well and, before leaving you let the teacher and director know that you’d contact them if you had any further questions and wished them both a great day.

You and Bucky discussed both options on the car-ride home. The pricing at the Swimming Station was better, but there was just something about it that you weren’t sure about. Bucky felt the differently, he liked both schools but the classes at The Swimming Station were smaller and it was closer to the compound.

You decided to have a swim with Noah and talk about it later, maybe over dinner. It was a shame you couldn’t ask Noah for his opinion.

You gave Noah an early bath and dinner after your swim and he was asleep before you and Bucky sat down for your dinner. It had been a big day for your little boy.

“So” you and Bucky both said at the same time.

Laughing you continued “We have to sort out which swim school we are going to send Noah to. They both have their positives, I just think that Tiny Fin has more positives.”

“Uh-huh, I hear you, I just think the smaller class sizes at the station would suit him better.”

Back and forth you talked it out for the duration of your dinner, in amongst remembering funny stories about some of the memories you made in the last 6 years that centred around swimming and water.

Sitting on the couch, snuggled into his side, you both ended up deciding on Tiny Fin for Noah. It was newer and the vibe was amazing and you were ok with spending a little more time and money to have the best for your little man.

A week later, on Saturday morning, you got Noah ready for his first swim class. You and Bucky played rock, paper, scissors to decide who got in the pool with Noah. Normally they didn’t do this for toddlers his age, but given it was his first lesson they had offered you or Bucky to get in the pool with him.

After 3 rounds, Bucky won 2-1. You should have known, he always beat you at rock-paper-scissors. Next time, you’d have to think of another way to decide - or you’d have to distract him some way.

You arrived at Tiny Fin, having set up the payment and membership information through the week online. As you picked up your membership tag, you saw Anthony, the director and waved as Bucky took Noah down to poolside to get him ready for the class. On your way to join them you saw the teacher and by the time you got to the pool deck, Bucky was already in the pool with Noah. Your breath hitched in your throat as you watched your husband, bare-chested with your baby boy in his arms. Noah was squealing with joy as one of his favourite places to be was in the water.

The way Bucky was looking at him and holding him and laughing with him near about stopped your heart. One thing was for certain, he was getting a tribe.

Tag list: @cjand10 @angstysebfan @psychictazzy76 @lovely-geek @samanthaneedsanap @kentokaze @void-imaginations @iheartsebastianstanstuff @yourmumsluke

#james bucky barnes #ozwriterchick #dad!bucky #bucky barns x reader #dad!bucky x reader #Dad!Bucky x Little

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dcfanficsgallore · 6 months

Text

Didn't plan for this

Wonder Woman x Demigod!Fem!Reader

2859 words

TW: Broken Leg, Hospitals, Reader overthinks everything

Masterlist

Summary: You have only seen a handful of times and have been trying to get her attention ever since, when a disaster occurs, it finally makes her look at you and talk.

A/N: This fanfic doesn't use the usual quotes to show character speaking. Instead they'll use a - to show that they are speaking and every new line of dialogue is a new paragraph. Also English isn't my first language. Enjoy! X3 <33

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Being a demigod in a world that gets invaded by aliens every other week and seems to have a new super-whatever everyday is pretty normal. Especially if you’re a child of Athena, like me…

We don’t get powers like the children of Zeus or the innate charisma of the Apollo kids, but we’re not as insufferable as the Aphrodite Spawn (Long story), we’re just… Pretty smart and can understand stuff that most can’t. When I was a kid my teachers always told my mortal mom that I was ‘gifted’, my mom knew it was always truer than what they intended, but she never told me about it. Nor about my Godly mom…

Usually when an alien attack happens or a supervillain breaks from prison I tend to help the people around me get to safety and prepare all my contingencies for if the threat gets too close, I only had to use a couple of my plans once, that was a mess! But it made me learn that Plan C and Plan T should not be anywhere near each other. Other than that I just wait until the danger is over and maybe, kinda, try to see if she is taking care of the mess.

Of all the children of Zeus, she is the best. Most caring, most humble, the prettiest, and just all around good person. I only met THE Wonder Woman once, and since then I’ve been trying to get her attention the only way a daughter of Athena like me can… I’ve been sending contingency plans to the Justice Hall in hopes one of them will make them want to talk to me and talk about it. You might say it’s pointless, Batman is the best planner in the world, and to that I say: Maybe he would like someone to delegate a few of his responsibilities to… You never know.

It was during one of my walks to my job that I felt it.

Earthquakes

No worries, those happen all the time in New York. I have nothing to fear, just a mild-

Another one, Bigger

Again, not enough to trigger my alarms, but enough to make me start walking slower… And check my bag to see if everything is with m-

A third one, and this time I fall over

Alright. That’s cause for concern, I start sprinting towards my job while grabbing all the stuff I need to start Plan E.

As I turn a corner expecting to see the street to the building I work at, I am startled back by a falling lamp post.

This is bad

As I enter the building I see Ana, the secretary, ushering people out the building.

- How is it looking? - I ask her as another earthquake begins and doesn’t seem to stop.

- There’s still people inside - She looks at me with a worried expression - You might have to bring out Plan H - She says.

Ana is my best friend and that gives her the privilege of a binder with all my plans so she can help me choose one in big stress situations. That’s still not enough because she just suggested the Bird People Protocol, but I get the gist of what she wants.

- I think you might be right - I say not wanting to get into an argument of my plans with her right now

Being a prepared Child of Athena is very helpful when you're the Chief of Security of the company. I take a deep breath, say a little prayer to my mom hoping for a little luck to get inside and not die. And go in…

The first thing I see as I go through the doors is the bottom floor is collapsing. I rush a couple people out while I make my way to my office, in there I’ll find everything to hopefully save everyone. I just have to go up two floors, the elevators are a bust and a death trap. So the stairs are gonna be my friends.

As I start going up I hit a couple buttons on the wall to trigger the slides that help people go down the stairs faster, (hey, it works for airplanes and they were cheap to install. Just a button and they self inflate).

When I open the door to the second floor I am met by so many people that are injured. I go to usher them to the slides, after finding a couple interns that are so scared but not that bad physically and instruct them on what to do once they get down and keep moving towards my office.

I begin to see my office, it's right there, just a few more moments and everything will be fi-

feel a lot of pain and a crack coming from behind me

Something fell on me. I look back and see that my leg is stuck between a stone pillar and the floor. I feel a lot of pain, but I can't stop. I've already sent everyone on this floor down and there are more above me. If I give up now I’ll die along with everyone else, that’ll not be something that a Demigod will be doing today, I tell myself.

I start to try to lift the pillar with all my strength, it’s hard, it might be impossible, I start thinking of ways to maybe leverage a piece of debris as maybe a lever when the pillar starts to float? It’s not floating, someone picked it up. But who..?

It’s her, in all her glory. She looks exactly like I remember, the black locks of hair flowing, the tiara reflecting the little light inside this crumbling building, her golden lasso on her hand and the pillar on the other, she lifting it like it doesn’t weigh anything. Her ocean blue eyes that are looking directly into my soul, her furrowed brows like she’s mad? Wait, no, she IS mad!

- What are you doing! - She says with an alarm in her tone - I was helping the people off the building when I saw you running INTO it? What are you trying to do?

The reality of the situation finally hits me and I say

- Help me. My office. I can help… - I say with difficulty as my leg starts to hurt a lot more now that the big rock was removed.

She looks at me like I just grew frog legs beneath the pillar, not understanding why I’m trying so hard to go even deeper into the crumbling building.

I say it one more time and she seems to snap out of it.

- What are we looking for? - She says as she picks me up bridal style and starts sprinting into the room. Even with a broken leg I manage to get flustered, but quickly dismiss it as I get my head back in the game

I push myself down and limp to my desk, opening a drawer and pushing a button labeled ‘U’.

Immediately the result can be felt as dozens of inflatable slides appear going from every single window sill, out of seemingly thin air, and gives everyone on the above floors a chance to take a faster way down. But not everything can go according to plan as life constantly likes to remind me. The slide on my window did not trigger so I think I’m stuck until I feel myself being picked up again and my heroine jumps out of the window landing safely with me in her arms.

After that she puts me down on a sidewalk and says

- That was incredibly smart, aren’t you the woman that always has a plan? - She says, and I’m a little upset that that’s how she remembers me.

- Yeah, that 's me. A daughter of Athena trying her best - I say before my leg starts to demand more of my attention and I whimper a little

- Oh your leg! Right! - She says before picking me up again and without all the smoke and panic I can actually feel her muscles and smell a little perfume, strawberry? Maybe Daisy? Maybe alcohol? Wait… That’s the ambulance, I’m in the ambulance getting alcohol rubbed on my leg by a paramedic, staring into her sapphire eyes and she’s saying something... Oh shit she said something!

- Sorry what? - I say trying to cool my nerves from seeing her again

- I said I’ll be right back to check on you, these quakes are not natural. The League is currently stopping the cause of it but there are still civilians trapped in building that don’t have slides that help them get down - She smiles a little and it’s the prettiest smile I have ever seen

- Yeah, it’s cool, you’re a hero and all that - Say in an effort to look casual in the face of all this

A few hours later I had to be taken to the hospital to get my leg on a cast and suspended above me on the bed that I’m laying down on. Ana made it out without any serious injuries and is keeping me company, and by company I mean she’s currently hearing me be anxious about my meeting with The Wonder Woman.

- She said she would check on me later - I say for what’s probably the thousandth time

- Yup, but when she said you were on the street getting tended to by an EMT. Now she probably has no idea where you - She keeps trying to manage my expectations.

- But look at the TV Ana, a lot of people need help, she’s probably helping them. and this is one of the only hospitals that didn’t seem to be that affected by the quake! - I reason with her.

- Why do I keep getting into arguments with you? - she says with a long sigh - Damn Owl Spawn - she says with a smirk that gets wiped by the pillow I throw on her face

- Because you live in hope that you can win! - I tease back and am promptly met by the same pillow hitting my face.

-But seriously Y/N - She says looking at me - I wouldn’t get my hopes up, she’s a superhero. She’ll probably be busy until the next morning and then she’ll probably go back to her place and sleep for a long time, maybe she’ll forget.

- I can still hope, right? - I say a little sadly to Ana who nods and pulls me into a hug

- You should get some rest Bird Brain, I’ll be here if you need anything - Ana says, going to turn off the light and heading to her chair next to my bed.

- Fine - I say as the day finally catches up to me and I fall asleep almost immediately

It’s probably not until around 4 A.M when I hear a little tapping on my hospital window, at first I think I’m dreaming because I’m quite a way high up on this hospital, I would say about 30,5 meters away from ground level. But then I hear it again

tap tap tap

Okay, that’s not a dream. I take my leg off the suspension gently so as to not hurt myself and open the curtain to see… HER! She’s flying and staring at me through the window looking a bit shy, if I were to guess.

- You’re here!? - I open the window and question a little too happy about this meeting

- I told I would be - she smiles - How are you doing? - she questions looking at my cast.

- I’m doing fine - I shrug - The drugs help with the pain and I heal quite fast.

- Right, you’re also a demigoddess - she says with a smile - So am I.

- You are? You mean you’re not a goddess? - I ask and immediately regret it. You don’t ask a pretty woman that? Are you nuts? I say to myself thinking she’ll be put off by my comment and fly away. But to my surprise, she laughs and it’s the most beautiful laugh I’ve ever heard.

- No no, I’m the daughter of Zeus with the queen of the amazons, Hippolyta - She says in a casual way like that wasn’t a huge bombshell for me to discover

- That’s so cool - I say after making myself pick my jaw from the floor - Would you… ummm… Would you like to come in? - I ask her and to my surprise she accepts

The first thing I notice when she comes in is how tall she is, I think I would’ve figured out she was an Amazon with enough time, I quickly notice that she’s probably 6,2 inches, which makes me feel fuzzy inside. The next thing I notice is how strong she is. When she went inside, she picked me up by my side and sat me down on the bed before finally touching the floor.

I realize I’m staring again and that I missed what she was saying, again! This never happens to me.

- I’m so sorry, I was distracted, what did you say? - I say hoping she doesn’t think I’m always like this.

- I just asked if she’ll wake up anytime soon. - She repeats without a hint of annoyance. Gesturing to Ana sleeping on the chair in a position that doesn’t seem that comfortable but I’m not one to judge.

- Oh Ana? No, she only wakes with her alarm or when stuff is thrown at her - I say chuckling.

There’s an awkward silence before she clears her throat and says

- I’m Diana, by the way, Diana Prince - she says putting her hand out - I just wanted to say that the fact that you went inside the collapsing building when you could’ve turned the other way and ran, really impressed me.

I blush very hard when she says that, then I shake her hand and say

- I’m Y/N Y/L/N, it really means a lot to me that you found that impressive. And just so you know, running was not an option, that building had so many contingencies inside it I needed to know that one of them worked. If I didn’t try my own plans what kind of child of wisdom would I be? - I say while shaking her hand

- Hm, does your mother require that of all her children? - She asks almost concerned

- No, not at all. She doesn’t even talk to us! - I say without thinking, this woman makes me so flustered my brain stops working I swear! - It’s more, like an itch. An itch in the back of your mind that doesn’t go away if you don’t test your contraptions

- She doesn’t talk to you? I’m sorry… - She says with sympathy on her voice

-Don’t be - I wave it off - She’s a goddess, she probably has more important things to do. Besides, I got my smarts and that’s all I need. - I say shuffling on the bed and putting my foot back in it’s place.

She sits next to me and says

- It’s still sad that our parents don’t talk to us

I shrug before gathering my courage and finally asking

- Why’d you come to see me? I’m sure you meet people that are more interesting than me everyday and it’s not like you owe me or anything, you saved life twice today and now you’re here checking on me. Why? - I ask and she thinks for a moment before smiling and… Wait, is she blushing?

- Well it’s simple really, I was very impressed by the fact that you had a protocol in place for such an event and had the guts to go in and make sure it went accordingly that I wanted to maybe see if you were interested in… Showing me some of your plans - That last part seemed to catch her off guard, but I’ll never say no to someone willing to listen to my plans so I get very excited.

- Yeah, sure, of course! I’ll probably be out of the hospital in a couple of days, maybe less if I can convince the docs I’ll take it easy. - I agree a little too fast, but I don’t care. Diana wants to see my plans! - Here’s my number - I give her my number scribbled on a piece of paper I got in my bag - Give me a call please, and we’ll set it up. - I say a little too eager and failing miserably to be cool

- Yeah, sure - she says, accepting the paper and… She is definitely blushing! - I’ll give you a call, and we’ll set up our date… - She stops herself after she says that - I mean, like a friend date.

- I can accept a date - I blush and nod and look away, trying everything I can to not look her in those sapphire eyes

She gets up and goes to the window but before she looks at me and says.

- I hope I get to see you soon - she says before flying off into the distance

a- Same - I say before snuggling in my bed ready to dream about her but not before hearing

- I heard the whole thing! - Ana says before receiving a face full of pillow.

- We’ll talk in the morning - I say ending the conversation.

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Chapter 2

A/N: Some might call Y/N Paranoid, she would say prepared ;)

#wonder woman x reader #diana prince x reader #wonder woman fanfic #my fic #DianaSimp #justice league fanfic #wonder woman #diana of themyscira #diana prince #diana of themiscyra #wonder woman x you

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honeybeezgobzzzzz · 10 months

Text

As Dawn Blooms: An "As Dawn Breaks' A/U

Chapters ideas are broken down into paragraphs. First read though the kids descriptions so you know what is sort of going on (Dawn has enough of Morpheus's essence mixed w/ hers to make more kids without getting down and dirty with the broody idiot). They have 7 children in total btw

This picks right after Morpheus rejects Dawn and their pregnancy

In order by age:

The Twins:

𓅨 Devotion (m.)

Legit carbon copy of Dream, down to his broody atmosphere. Except Devotion loves his mother more than anything in the universe and anyone who dare disrespects her better start running.

𓅨 Liberty (f.)

Almost a carbon copy of Dream, but she’s got Dawn’s eyes and temper. Looks sweet and sophisticated on the outside, will destroy you body and mind in a heartbeat with words only, should it come to that.

The Triplets:

The Triplets are identical carbon copies of Dawn and one can never know which one they speak with unless told because the Triplets are mischievous and tricksters.

𓅨 Honor (m.)

Values honor above everything else. Very respectful. At least respectful unless his mother is insulted. Then Honor must uphold his mother’s honor… and he can get very vicious about it.

𓅨 Wit (m.)

Will make you cry with words alone. Is also way too smart for his own good and everyone knows it. Upset or insult his mother? Wit will destroy you with words and there will be nothing left of you.

𓅨 Mercy (m.)

Compassionate and forgiving. The demure triplet. At the same time? He is the personification of mercy, and can choose whether or not to give it. Especially if someone hurts or bad mouths his mother.

Non-Binary Child:

𓅨 Truth (nb.)

Has Dawn’s facial features and hair, but their eyes are definitely from Dream. Much like an elf, Truth will never tell lies. But that doesn’t mean they don’t know how to twist their words. Androgynous AF. Petty AF. Trash talk their mother? Your funeral. Truth is the most vicious out of all of Dawn’s children.

Baby Girl of the Family:

𓅨 Faith (f.)

Has beautiful midnight hair but striking eyes from her mother. Faith has unwavering faith that everything will always work out, no matter how dire the circumstances. Perhaps a bit naive, but she has six older siblings to look after her and a mother that would destroy the universe should anyone ever hurt precious Faith.

Dawn returns home heartbroken, it takes everything from the handmaidens to console her. Dawn ends up speaking to Mother Night and Father Time. They calm her down, express disappointment in Dream for the gift they gave him, fully support Reader, they also give her the ability to fully hide their existence from all (aka magic can’t be used to discover their existence). | Reader is pregnant with twins, one boy and one girl. Working on a nursery. Won’t let anyone into the garden while she is pregnant for fear of something happening to children.

TWINS— Gives her birth, boom, insta hot body is back. Born as intelligent babies. The grandparents are extremely proud and bless the kids, super charged, union between hopes and dreams. Dawn being paranoid, severs her connection to Dream (the other Endless couldn’t tell the diff between Dawn and Dream’s combined essence and the kids, so no one knew she was pregnant. Dawn forgets about her heartbreak, consumed by her love for her children. The fates eventually visit, coo over the toddlers like great grannies or something, they talk with reader about not trusting the rest of the Endless with the knowledge of her children’s existences.

TRIPLETS— Over the years, Dawn hears about Dream. He was basically living a hopeless existence, a hell of his own making, and so were the rest of the Siblings, so much so that discord and infighting was quite common between the siblings the longer Dawn kept them away from her. They were all hopeless. More talk with the Fates. Dawn still fulfilled her function to perfection, even better than before. | This time she is pregnant with triplets, the twins are excited but also super protective. Dawn has to convince them to leave. Her children would eventually leave to see the world, but they'd always remain in contact and return. Always. There was no better place than home.

NON-BINARY— So, neither Dream nor the rest of the siblings, no Gods, no Morningstar. No one would know about Dawn's children. Even when the kids went to the mortal world and interacted with humans and eventually appeared in some dreams, they'd be safe because their presence would be masked, their essence and face hidden. There would be no way for anyone to find out unless Dawn allowed it. | Dawn has five kids now, the triplets are thick as thieves and adore the gardens, very proactive in helping Dawn with her duties. The children would be wonderful, mischievous, powerful and happy. | Dawn is speaking with her sixth kid, who views themself as nonbinary, Dawn is like ‘okay? And why is this a problem?’. Six kid is alike: Best. Mom. Ever. A balance between hopes a dream, just as perfect and as necessary as the others.

BABYGIRL— Dawn is hunkered down in her bedroom, the twins drop by, discover that Dawn has enough of her shared essence to have one more kid, but she is unsure because it is the last time she will feel Dream within her essence. Twins give it to her straight, kind of harping on their dad and telling her that she doesn’t need his essence to be happy (but I feel like there’s a hole without him)(excuses mother). So she uses the last bit of the essence to have one more child. | Family dinner with the six kids, they’re all exited about the last sibling. Question Dawn whether it will be a boy or a girl. She tells him that it’s a little girl.

Family dinner, arguments about Dawn not being there. It'd come to a point in which Destiny would no longer be able to keep quiet and the whole universe would know of Dream's dirty little secret. Maybe this could be the reason for Delight becoming Delirium, Despair becoming worse, Desire hating Dream, Destruction abandoning his post. All because Dawn was gone. She was supposed to give them hope, to stick them together, to balance them, but she was driven away and the rest of the Endless were deprived of hope.

One day Dream get’s caged. One day he'd be caged and no one would help him. Dawn would feel this, but she would not be able to help without him asking for it. She'd not go out of her way to help him, but I can see her opening her gates to Dreams and Nightmares. Some would go there, find support when the Dreaming started to collapse. Some Nightmares would change themselves and act as Dreams and some Dreams would act as Nightmares. They all had hope to be whatever they wanted.Of course that Dawn would have to create an area specific to the Nightmares and another for Dreams because it'd not end well if both realms joined in such a way. I'd love to see the Corinthian becoming fond of Dawn, finding out about Dream's kids, becoming their "Uncle Cori", so much so that he'd feel like exacting some revenge on Dream.

Eventually he'd free himself, ask the Fates about his vestments, receive from them quite the verbal Lashing. Then he'd look for his sand, and Johanna would be like "You look familiar", “coulda sworn I met a fellow who looks just like you, even had the same brooding scowl,” then he'd look for his helm and Lucifer would toy and humiliate him (by this point the entire universe would know of Dream's children and all the gossip involved). Everyone would know, but Dream would have no idea. He'd be made a fool of, and he'd have no idea of how and why. Morningstar and the entirety of hell would laugh in his face.

Then, he'd go to get his ruby, then deal with the Vortex, have a fight with Corinthian while the Nightmare taunted him with something Dream didn't know. Devotion rescues Calliope at the behest of his mother who learned of Calliope’s entrapment. Devotion brings Calliope back to The Gardens. Dawn offers a place to live there. Calliope accepts. | Dream would visit his friend and Hob would ask "Do you have a twin brother or a son? I came across a young man who looked exactly like you, and a girl with your eyes. Boy “was especially broody and the girl had a stare that could intimidate anyone. Kinda freaky how much the boy looked like you. Dream would realize a few things. And he'd despair. During this journey he, coincidentally would see one of the young man who looks just like him. The young man would disappear before his eyes. Dream would despair even more.

Eventually he'd go see Desire and they'd taunt him, play with him, humiliate him. He'd not be a blameless victim here. Nay sir, no more free passes 😒😒😒 The triplets, Honor, Wit, & Mercy, go see Dream first while visiting a few of their friends in The Dreaming. They tell Dream that they have older siblings and younger ones, but won’t elaborate. All three are very blatant and vicious with their words, indicating that they are protecting their mother from him. They depart, Dream is dumbstruck at the thought of more kids than just the kid that looks just like him, the girl and the triplets. Matthew goes to investigate, meets Faith, who gives him all the dirty details while having tea with her fellow doves. Matthew decides against telling Dream.

Dream goes back to Desire to discuss business, and that is when Truth is visiting, Truth introduces themself: “Well if it isn’t my lovely father.” Sardonically. That’s another kid. Dream presses truth about being able to visit The Gardens and see Dawn. Truth twists their words, pisses Dream off, displays their frighteningly powerful power. “Ta ta!” | The triplets are visiting their mother, bring up meeting their father, Dawn is caught off guard, plays it off, finishes having tea with them, they leave, Dawn goes to her garden where she tries not to break down.

Dream is broodily feeding birds, Faith drops by, they talk. Dream is smacked in the face with how nice and hopeful Faith is. Not to mention she looks like Dawn but has his eyes. | Dream is visiting Hob, talking about meeting his eldest children, the ones he scorned and hurt Dawn so badly. Hob is understanding, and then Devotion and Liberty drop by. Hob comments how alike Dream and Devotion are, Devotion is stoned faced, Liberty is very passive aggressive. Devotion ends the talk with that if Dream wants to see Dawn, he’ll have to go through all seven of his children.

There is a millennial meeting, the Endless harp on dream about hosting it this time after this absence, he’s like no, but the others get their way.The kids are very against their mother going, but she puts her foot down, telling them it’s time to stop crying over Dream and she kind of wants a little revenge mom vibe. So she goes, and when the seven Endless kids enter the palace grand hall, everyone is shocked because they are never all together. Every then keels over when Dawn her mother fucking self blasts her way behind them badass and drop dead gorgeous. Dream has a coronary, not expecting her to come. The seven kids end up being a barrier between Dream and Dawn the entire night.

That night, after the kids have all bid their mother goodnight. Dawn is chilling in her room alone. Lucienne drops by. | The next day, Dream seeks out Faith, who is with Truth speaking with some dreams and nightmares in the village. He asks to speak to them alone. He then apologizes, and tells them the truth about why he was so harsh with Dawn and asks to be allowed to speak with their mother. They relent, but do not speak for the other children. (Aka, he will need to get all of their permission, before being allowed to talk to Dawn.

Dream seeks out the Triplets next, finds them with the newly made Corinthian, Wit, Mercy, and Honor hanging out with their uncle. Wit is ruthless as usual. Honor goes after Dream for being so disrespectful towards their mother, and Mercy brings up the fact that while he might embody Mercy, he is sometimes without. Dream doesn’t make excuses. | Dream finds Liberty playing with some of the youngsters of the dreaming. She doesn’t pull her punches or words. Being very harsh and clear, also brings up that he didn’t just abandon her mother, but Liberty and her brother as well. Dream just wants a chance at making things right. She relents, but reminds Dream that while she and the younger siblings might be more convinced to allow him near their mother, Devotion is an entirely different discussion, because Devotion takes after Dream a lot, and is by far the most protective (not to mention vindictive).

The next day, at breakfast, Dream is gazing at Devotion who is glaring back while having breakfast with his mother. Dawn is wondering what has him so worked up, he tells her not to worry about it. It takes Dream all day for a chance to talk to Devotion. It’s sunset when Devotion allows him to approach in the garden. Explosive garden, revealing just how alike father and son are. Devotion ultimately relents, but tells Dream that he doesn’t care if his grandparents punish him, he will destroy Dream if he hurts his mother again. It’s no empty threat. |Dawn is in her room, its nighttime, she’s all dressed for bed, feels a familiar presence and calls out for Dev, or Devotion, thinking that it’s him. Nope, out pops Dream. Cue shocked Dawn, Dream explains that he got permission from all their children to see her. Dawn is like, Devotion would never have let you near me if you hadn’t gotten his permission, so you may speak. Dream grovels.

Naturally, Dawn forgives him and Dream converges on her, not believing that he can hold her within his arms once more. Smut cause these two idiots can’t keep their hands off each other.

Breakfast rolls around, the seven are eating breakfast, Triplets wonder where their mom is, looking at her empty chair. Devotion’s eye twitches as the empty throne of Dream is apparent and none of them have felt an explosion of anger from their mother (meaning she hasn’t bitten their father’s head off yet). Devotion and Liberty share a look. Liberty explains that she is probably, still in bed. Faith and Truth are like ‘Gross’ and the Triplets are like, so, we getting a new sibling then??? Devotion is at his wits end with his siblings | Final meeting of all eight original endless, they’re shocked to see Dawn entering beside Dream (whose hair looks even more messed up then usual) Eyebrows go up and Dawn is like I told you you should have brushed it! Rather than be elusive about his relationship with Dawn, Dream smirks down at her and guides her over to a chair before pulling it out and helping her sit down.

#the sandman #dream the endless x reader #dream x reader #dream of the endless x reader #dream the endless #dream of the endless #lord morpheus #morpheus #morpheus x reader

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theblueflower05 · 11 months

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First of all, I love that you enjoyed my comments cause honestly I was worried I ranted to long, but I couldn’t help it and I could’ve done a whole reaction to all the paragraphs though Fr

No cause I’m not just digging omega Neteyam it’s now my new obsession. He needs someone to take care of him hundred percent agree boy needs to be babied.

The way you wrote him was believable like I could literally see him being this way omg, I can’t even express how much I loved it even my reblog isn’t enough I need to say again

Don’t you apologize for making me horny you deserve to have everybody who reads this to be horny cause it’s that fantastic.

Neteyam goes into full heat during the next part and I’m so excited to share it with ya’ll. Things are about to get wayyyyy dirty and fun.

Bring it on ‘buckles in’ I’m so ready for this I’m not even kidding be ready for another long rant from me ♡

Baby baby babyyyyy.

My heart is like. Bursting rn.

I’m so glad that there’s other bottom Neteyam lovers on here. That boys a SUB.

Like he’s got so much in his plate. There’s nothing but pressure put on his shoulders. You’re trying to tell me he doesn’t want someone to coddle him? That he doesn’t want his hair played with, and his back massaged and to be fucking held?

Ugh.

So like. I know that people love Dom!Neteyam and like that is what most prefer to write but no joke I was was so sad to see that this story kinda sorta flopped-

BUT IVE GOTTEN A HANDFUL OF COMMENTS LIKE THIS.

For the few of us that love Subby Nete, I’m about to throw down lol.

I have over 3k already written for part 2. Im like. Feral over this shit.

Like. He wants so fuck and be fucked so bad. I can’t wait. It’s like. The most brain rottingly hot shit I’ve ever thought about, much less written.

Please, keep talking to me about this. I could go on forever.

How do you feel about Tsireya being an Alpha?

Im obsessed with Omega Tonowari being surrounded by Alpha women who would literally skin anyone if they ever challenged his rule.

It was so hard not to make Neytiri an Alpha too, but I wanted to break like “gender norms” for this story.

Literally let’s talk about everything. We’re best friends now.

@cinetrix and @imperihoe are also deep into this A/B/O Omega!Neteyam hole. I say we all spiral lol send me any and all ideas so I can incorporate them into the next chapters.

#hi babyyyyyyyy #💓💓💓💓💓

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f0xgl0v3 · 4 months

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Games played in Camp Jupiter

Covering smaller games that the kids have taken time to play, and the bigger official games, this post was going to be also a Camp Half-Blood one but really like… I just don’t talk about CHB lol.

When I mention something about actual Ancient Rome, take any and all my words with pinches of salt, I try to research a lot but for silly posts like this I cannot 100% confirm that my information is historically accurate. I am not historian:]

Camp Jupiter

Camp Jupiter takes their games seriously. Literally doesn’t matter the game, everyone get super riled up for the war games. Or you’d see the most competitive game of Yahtzee. Staring with the canon war games first, the ones mentioned are listed below,

Death ball; described as similar to paint ball, except wild- using things like various dangerous poisons, acids, and fireballs (however that may be) and is the most deadly. Canonically (as we get the only deathball match in Camp Jupiter classified) is played by launching the balls from mini manuballista, or smaller variants of a type of ancient Roman crossbow. We only get one paragraph explaining it then move on, I think that’s the nature of CJC and I honestly don’t care for it that much. Despite my confusion on how this game canonically is described, I’d like to say my own Hc I got when I first heard ‘Deathball’ in SoN. In my head it’s water balloon fight, dodgeball-esque. With all of the deadly things in these balls that break on contact. It probably is the newest war game after some Praetors in more modern times instated it. The game is very loose, you’re with your contubernium (A Contubernium is the smallest unit in the Roman military, close to modern squads and though they likely didn’t serve much purpose other than to boost morale and like group stuff in the legion I like thinking of them serving a slightly bigger purpose in my Camp Jupiter- more on that in the future) and the goal is probably to make it to a certain marker or something without loosing members or whatever. Because reminder, the war games are just practices of war skills that the legionnaires need to know and serve a purpose to train them and aren’t just silly little games. And as for a cherry on top Ancient Romans possibly played Dogeball akin games- (P.S Frank also mentions this one too but I just didn’t mention that)

Siege is the name of the game we see in SoN and I really don’t have many thoughts on Siege, think that maybe it’s a bit more organized and the cohorts have a lot more stratagem (my autocorrect just used stratagem and I’m not changing it) involved in it. War games are probably a like twice a month thing and are announced probably the week before(? Like the first week of the month the war game for next Friday is announced and then after that the next is announced for the last day of the month, idk tho) and cohorts are given more time to plan.

Gladiator battles; Frank mentions this once and then we move on with no further explanation. I’d think this (and chariot racing among other things) are played in New Rome, and it’s a bracket tournament style (sort of like how Wrestling meets work except also trying to narrow it down until all the matches funnel into one victor? Like those bracket things in like basketball or in the movies- idk) and should only have one victor like I said. Killing isn’t the name of the game in this iteration (they still need their legionnaires-) though injuries are very common and a few have died to it, but surprisingly has a pretty low death rate; probably because they have both camp medics and actual doctors from New Rome on site.

Chariot Racing; the other one that Frank mentions. Also in New Rome, worked roughly the same as in Rome. I don’t have many thoughts other than this shifts Camp a bit and (like from my skimming of some articles-) higher ranking legionnaires and higher ranking families like to have their own horse teams, certain legionnaires take interest in charioteering too. Two members from each cohort are possibly selected for the chariot racing (Two races occur every time, for the fun of it) and compete as usual.

Legionnaires when finally retiring from the legions often do like pursuing careers that correlate to was ancient Roman sports were like. There are leagues purely for different teams within New Rome, seeing as sports are very important (Also if including my silly little outposts hc, they also have their own teams and the leagues have their own stuff and it’s like sports-)

Now, I’m actually good with the list of canon war games and don’t have much more to add onto it, and therefore I wanna get into the smaller games that legionnaires on their own free time like playing,

Swimming; Legion-wide activity that legionnaires like taking part in, whether that is swimming in the little tiber, or in recreational parts of the bathhouse/bathhouses. Legionnaires from not New Rome like to introduce water games.

Boxing and wrestling are givens though they lean more ancient, no dying but the rules are a bit looser. Boxing gloves aren’t used and Camp opts for the traditional method of wrapping your hands with cloth or even just going bare knuckle if both parties agree to it. It’s recreational and not taken too seriously, though disputes sometimes are solved in any method of these smaller games (think duel esque but not actually dying)

Running events; stuff like foot races are really common in camp for freetime. Also doubles as crucial camp training for stamina and strength, plus tag has begun to be integrated too.

Soccer; American football hasn’t caught on too much but Soccer is shared between bother parties. Modern soccer and then New Rome’s soccer type, along with other ball games like rugby, and kickball.

Mythomagic; practically universal. Most New Rome kids grew up on it and will teach new legionnaires that don’t know. There’s a shop in New Rome that specializes in games.

Any type of Ancient Roman board games; there’s a lot and I don’t want to list all of them but this category. Most legionnaires grew up on them and play them with each other. Though it gets competitive.

Yahtzee; have I ever played Yahtzee? No. Do I know how to play Yahtzee? Also no. But it has dice in it and I feel like several Demigods made homemade Yahtzee and started playing.

Varying modern board games; some have caught on but all are mostly homemade except for a few that are from New Rome or families that live outside of New Rome sending them to active legionnaires. Things like monopoly are popular

Mafia; New Rome kids have run with it and it really is a good skill builder for their mind skills or whatever. (I put it in because I like Mafia and I don’t hear people talk about it.)

Note on a future update of the Camp Jupiter map, I have given up on drawing it- drawing it makes it 10x more confusing for me, I’ll just describe things and buildings and I’m honestly better at that. If anyone wants to tackle drawing it from any future descriptions I’d give them go ahead but for now I’ll stick to just describing it all with my delight rather than stressing myself over a map lol.

Also the gaming scene needs to come out with a rpg(?) game set in Ancient Rome with deep character customization, interesting story, and focuses more on the story than combat mechanics because I want that (think Pokémon or Hogwarts legacy esque) also a Pjo game that is similar to the games I mentioned, please I’d froth at the throat over it.

Anyway like I said this was supposed to include CHB games but like- I don’t know but I just.. don’t talk about CHB. I’m more motivated about Camp Jupiter and like talking about it more.

Also wanted to include my favorite board game (Ticket to Ride) in this but I sadly do not think it’s very popular in Camp Jupiter. Also I spitefully didn’t name Chess, but chess is probably played.

#hehe :3 #pjo hoo toa #camp jupiter #hoo #hoo headcanon #camp jupiter headcanons #just wanted to blabber about something more lighthearted in Camp Jupiter #okay bye

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givemeanaccountalready · 2 months

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HELLO MOOTIE im here to ask ur opiniom on 18 and 21 for the milgram asks 😵‍💫 ALSO have a nice day, if not then im sure tomorrow will be. IF STILL NOT then the other day, the other and other and other- okay dont forget to rehydrate urself if u hadn't. thats all thank you!!

Hello, and same to you, my friend~

Don’t mind me, just gonna take advantage of not having a specified character to babble on about as many characters as possible. I’m just a silly gal, a silly goose if you will 🪿

18.) What non-Deco Vocaloid songs do you think suits them?

Jackalope: “Welcome to the Internet” by Bo Burnham. Do I need to explain?

Es: “Saint Bernard” by Lincoln although I thought “Autoheart” by Sailor Song fit them as well (more so Es singing it to Kotoko/us). At this point, the poor kid’s exhausted and straining under the pressure and guilt so I think “Saint Bernard” fits them rather well.

Haruka: Hmmm. This one's tough. I'm gonna have to go with “I’ll Be Good” by Jaymes Young. It’s mournful and pleading and I think if he had been voted guilty in Trial One, his second trial song would have vibes of “I’m bad but I want to be better” instead of “I’ll be bad to be better,” that All-Knowing, All-Agony gives me. As a runner up, "Not While I'm Around," from the Sweeney Todd: Demon Barber of Fleet Street musical. I can just picture him singing it.

Yuno: “Bring on the Men” from the Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde musical. It’s fun, full of quips and innuendos, and definitely embraces her take on sex work.

Fuuta: “Dance, Dance” by Fall Out Boy. I feel like this fits his vibe.

Muu: “We R Who We R” by Kesha. Love her, hate her, you gotta admit that Muu wants to embody this IDGAF confidence, and I will indulge her with this song (where's the yellow paint can? I liked using it for Muu).

Shidou: “The Night We Met” by Lord Huron. It just sounds very mournful and fits his longing to see his loved ones again.

Mahiru: “E.T.” by Katy Perry, specifically the one without Kanye West because it vibes better with her. It's less... let's say Katy Perry is less direct about what she wants from her alien, and I feel like Mahiru could barely spit out an innuendo because of her dedication to her 'good girl' image.

Kazui: I suppose “False Confidence” by Noah Kahan would be a good fit. The emphasis on trying to fake it till you make it and wishing to go back to when you were young and before you began faking your way through life. That said, "The Good in Me" by Jon Bellion was a close second.

Amane: Another tough one. Perhaps "Miss Independent” by Ne-Yo. I had a song on here that didn’t really fit her and then I heard this song on the radio and went, “No, that’s the one.” Something fun and light but still fits her idealized self.

Mikoto: “LA Devotee” by Panic! At the Disco. Like Fuuta, it just fits his vibe. That said, I feel like John is scream-singing "Fight Back" by NEFFEX at him.

Kotoko: “Interlude IV” by Zach Callison. I can only assume this is what her two brain cells discussed during the break between the first and second trials. It’s menacing but fits so well.

21.) Do you have any similarities with them/relate to them?

Hmmm. It'll probably be shorter if I write a paragraph rather than breaking it up by character. I suppose the two I relate the most to would be Es and Yuno, but I relate a startling amount to Shidou, if I’m being honest. Let me explain the Shidou thing first since I know that he is heavily disliked and how I relate to him is dependent on how I view his crime.

My impression of Shidou is that he was a doctor who looked at the forest rather than the trees. At the very least, he pushed for the family members of patients who were brain-dead to take them off life support. I think he also pushed for patients to undergo risky surgeries in hopes that it would treat them when their current treatment failed. Shidou never thought beyond treating the physical ailment, and it wasn’t until his wife and children were in the car accident where he was put in the same position that Shidou fully understood the emotional weight of what he asked his patients and their families to do. With that, he began to suffocate under his own feelings of guilt and inadequacy (because if he couldn’t save his family, what is his worth?), and his push for the death penalty and claims about being irredeemable were his own attempts at trying to die so he can be with his family again. It was only when Kotoko attacked, that his savior complex was revived and he was given purpose again. I fully expect him to try and attack Kotoko (“remove that fang” anyone?) and push for the death penalty again during the third trial. Now, I know you’re thinking, wtf, how can you relate to this man?

Well, for starters, if the people I loved most in this world were violently ripped away from me while I stood helplessly by, I’d blame myself and look for reasons as to why I’m the worst and deserve death. Also, I have a lot of family who are nurses, and stories about dickhead doctors and the realities of illness, injuries, and treatments were common enough dinner conversations that hearing about, reading, and listening to Shidou act like a martyr makes me think, “Yeah, professional hazard,” not “what a scum ball.” To me, Shidou is the equivalent of a pothole in the street. I might startle if I fall into him but in all likelihood, I’ll trip, grumble, and move on. There’s also the part where I think, if I was a worse person, I’d probably be more like Shidou. He reminds me of what I could be if I was more arrogant, more willing to sacrifice in the name of the bigger picture.

But onto happier topics, I like to think I’m able to relate to Es. They have a strong sense of morality, integrity, and responsibility when it comes to their work. I like to think I keep to those three values when faced with an unknown or conflict. It’s admirable how they try to stay true to those values despite Milgram’s mental/physical interference when it comes to Es trying to remember or establish a sense of personhood separate of the organization’s will. With Yuno, I like to think I can read the room, albeit I’m probably on par with Muu, not Yuno when it comes to that. Although, I do understand her frustration with trying to establish agency when others try to limit it, and admire how willing she is to put herself out there to find herself. Actually, now that I write this down, I admire Yuno more than relate to her. I guess I’m Shidou and Es. Sorry y’all.

As a bonus, Jackalope. If I had to pick anything to relate to, I would certainly pick his love of the drama and chaos that goes on in Milgram. I definitely share his amusement for the chaos. As much as I enjoy all the prisoners (including Es in that), with the caveat of some more than others, I get a bit of a kick out of trying to use Jackalope’s taunts and jabs to predict what will happen next. If Es is the audience surrogate, then Jackalope is an author insert. He’s as enjoyable as he is smarmy, and I enjoy a battle of the wits. I’d probably lose against Jackalope in that battle, but hey, I’d lose with a shit-eating grin on my face. Jackalope definitely knows more than he lets on and while I don’t think he’s ever lied outright with how he prefers to dodge questions and give half-answers, he is using that to keep the upper hand and let things unfold. I don’t think I’m sadistic, but he is a fun enemy to face.

#milgram #ask game

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winns-stuff · 1 year

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WEBTOON RANT:

Okay I’ve finally got some time, had to take a mini break since everything is starting back up for me. But thanks to recent rants sent to me, I believe either the first or second rant sent actually (thank you so much for reminding me, I would’ve forgotten all about this otherwise), I can finally speak about how the comment section in romance genres especially although sadly it seems to be in any genre with a love interest or “shipping” material involved in it are ridiculously misogynistic and quite disturbing to interact with and read about.

Now before getting into this I wanna make it clear that I’m only speaking about the behavior that a lot of people on the app display and I’ll only be saying things pertaining to that. This is in no way trying to bash or turn people against webtoon users, I’m a webtoon user so that’s extremely hypocritical, this is really just to voice my opinion on something I’ve seen literally over the years. Is shipping fun and interesting? Yes, I’m not saying that these people should never ship two characters again I’m just going to be talking about the way people tend to react when there’s someone “ threatening” the ship.

Anyways, let me start off by saying this. I used to be an extreme shipper, I quite literally used to ship characters who stood beside each other with little to no chemistry at all. I didn’t even think about the logistics of actual shipping I just found two random characters and pronounced them lovers, it was terrible. That being said I understand first hand how it feels to want so badly to see your ship “sail” and for the two characters you adore so much to find that spark within each other, there’s no shame in wanting two characters to be together of course but there’s a boundary that I never crossed and you should cross as well.

That boundary being that you shouldn’t harass anyone involved with the product you’re viewing. Obviously this isn’t just a webtoon problem it’s a media problem, I’ve seen tons of hate messages and death threats go out to people who either voice acted the characters, created the characters, involved with the characters, or the company that produced it. It should never get so serious that you’re willing to threaten someone’s life over a few fucking pixels, that’s absolutely unacceptable and it’s uncalled for. No matter what happens to your favorite character or ship never should there ever be a time where you are going out of your way to harass someone you don’t even know. You don’t know what they’re dealing with and you don’t know how hard anything is for them so instead of being an asshole and doing things like that take a deep breath, step away from the computer and go watch something happy instead of purging yourself into darkness over one chapter of your favorite love interest talking to someone else (a woman most likely).

This goes for people who do stuff like that in real life too. It’s normal to see two celebrities interacting with each other and thinking “oh they could make a good couple” or something of that nature, I’m not getting on you for thinking two people could possibly be a good couple. But it becomes a problem when you are actively trying to DM these people, stalk, harass, insult, and berate these HUMAN BEINGS into dating each other. This is not one of those kid websites where you can put two peoples names on a wheel and see how compatible they are this is real life and what you’re doing is harming and hurting real people. Please distance yourself away from them and let them live peacefully and maybe even put some thought into deconstructing the obvious par-asocial relationship you’ve created with them, get to the root of it, and be better.

Now that I’ve gotten that out of the way I can move onto the topic of Webtoon. Pretty sure you might’ve forgotten I was even talking about that since I brought along two other topics but this is the paragraph(s) to remind you of them. Now if you’re not new to Webtoon then you’ll understand exactly what I’m talking about when I say that a lot of the romance genres have a lot of misogynistic people down in the comments. Whether it be misogyny from within or from the opposite gender it’s very prevalent when it comes to stuff like this. It’s just gotten to a point where it’s incredibly uncomfortable to even open or scroll down to the comments because whenever there’s another female character introduced to the story everyone loses their shit in very disturbing ways. It’s tiring to see fans wish death on yet another female character or insult her using disgusting language that you would most likely find in misogynistic men, it’s come to a point where it seems like you can’t even say another woman’s name in your own comic without everyone grabbing their pitchforks and forming a mob.

Listen again, I understand the passion behind the ships. I’m not invested in ships as much as I used to be because I grew out of them but this whole bias against women in favor of male characters are very disheartening. All women should be able to be respected and not treated or called words like “bitches” or “sluts” or “whores”, etc. It’s demeaning to hear and very unnecessary, besides there’s probably plenty people who love the very characters you speak so badly about. Just like how you want your ship to last they want their characters to have a proper story without being shamed before they could even do something wrong and just like how you get defensive over your ships other people get defensive about their favorite characters as well. Treat people how you’d like to be treated because I’m sure you would be hurt if other people treated you like you treat everyone else.

Last thing but also stop bashing people for liking those characters as well. I don’t see a reason why the fandoms have to attack people who enjoy the other women in the comics. Just like how you may relate or like how the main character is written someone else could enjoy how the other female character is written. It’s all a matter of being mindful and having the maturity not to hunt someone down over something like a ship, I understand the frustration but it should never go beyond that and turn into absolute hatred.

#lo critical #anti lore olympus #anti lo #webtoon

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adiarosefandoms · 2 years

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Hocus Pocus 2

Review: *Spoilers start at the end of paragraph 3

Look, I am a witchy girl. I love black cats, and medieval/Victorian fashion, and all things magic. With this I have also fallen in love with witch-themed movies and books. Wicked, Practical Magic, and Harry Potter I all love. But little else signifies the transition into the Halloween season for me quite like Hocus Pocus. Me and my family have been watching this movie every October for, I don’t even know how many years. So, you can imagine that I was very excited, but skeptical, when Disney announced that they would be coming out with a second movie. And all I can say is, I am pleasantly surprised. I’m not sure how bad a movie can even be with the Sanderson Sisters at the helm, and while the first Hocus Pocus is superior, this one was still loads of fun to watch and I have zero regrets. I don’t care about the new teen leads. I had no emotional connection to them, I didn’t care about them, they didn’t matter. They were a means to an end to get this second movie made. But every scene with the Sandersons or Billy, pure childhood nostalgia. To start with the real stars of this movie, lets discuss the witches. I remember vividly just transitioning from wanting to be a princess one day, to wanting to be a witch the next. They’re stories always just end up being much more sympathetic, and they just seem like more fun. Seeing the sisters on the screen, Bette Midler, Sarah Jessica Parker, and Kathy Najimy just looked like they were having so much fun. The dynamic between the three girls is as amusing and entertaining as it has always been, but they added an extra emotional element by giving us an origin where Winifred was almost taken from her sisters. And the ending where Winnie sees her sisters die, and without a second thought says that she doesn’t care about her powers, she wants her sisters back, it was just beautiful. But it was made even greater when revealed the sisters weren’t returning, she was going to them, and Winnie just had the most content smile on her face. You just can’t not love those witchy sisters. Next: Billy. I always liked Billy a lot. Next to Sarah he was my favorite character. But he just became even more lovable in this film, and even more like Johnny Depp Jack Sparrow/Edward Scissorhands character, so that I fully fell in love with him. I was skirting the edge of that pond before, but now I’m completely submerged and have zero regrets. I don’t know why actors focusing on physicality makes me fall for them, but every jerky movement Billy made just made me fall further and further. I also just loved the way he talked, and his insults to Winifred. Doug Jones was just fantastic in this role. I didn’t care for when the Sandersons appeared and did the musical number in the forest, because that’s meant to bewitch people and there was no one they were trying to bewitch. I was suddenly super afraid they were just gonna Disney Channel-ify the whole thing, but their cover of “One Way or Another” was super fun to watch. Also, I’m a little confused. Winnie plainly stated in the original movie that her book was given to her by Satan himself, so either that witch in the woods was Satan in disguise and Disney thought that Satan is too scary for kids, or the writers just forgot a key part of the canon they had to follow. I’m hoping it’s the former. I also really enjoyed all the callbacks to the original, including the fourth wall break of two guys actually watching a scene from the first Hocus Pocus. We had another black cat (though nonspeaking), Sarah’s song was reprised several times, and we got a random town’s lady in the mothers iconic Madonna costume. There were also mentions of Sarah’s hidden rat tails, talk of the spell that would one day be used on Binx, Mary riding a vacuum again (but this time two roombas), the use of water to trick the witches, the sisters saying “Buh-bye”, and Sarah gleefully shouting “Amok! Amok! Amok!”

Overall, the movie was just a good time. The Sandersons were fabulous as ever, most jokes landed, Billy was amazing, and it was about time that a book shed a tear after all the times they’ve made me cry. Is there going to a third one? The post-credit scene sure made it look like it, but I would be satisfied with this movie concluding the Hocus Pocus story. I was incredibly impressed with the writers’ abilities to not only emulate key characteristics of the witches, but also add more depth to them. If you’re looking for a high-quality feature, this movie isn’t for you. But if you want to have some fun, experience a spin on nostalgia, and get into the season, it’s a really good and quick watch. After all, it’s not meant to be a life-changing thing. It’s just a bunch of hocus pocus.

#hocus pocus #hocus pocus 2 #movies #halloween #halloween movies #disney

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whentherewerebicycles · 2 years

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all right friends 10 updates from the trenches:

still mostly off tumblr but am allowing myself to browse a bit in the evening, as you do

i have submitted 12 job applications and have heard nothing but i am trying not to freak out it’s not even been a full week for some of them and i am sure people took time off for the 4th!

today i spent literally 12 hours working on the same letter. i started getting concerned that i wasn’t tailoring the letters enough so i tried doing more but then it was so long i was having to restructure other parts of the letter and then i was making it worse so i ditched six hours of work and started over again. kill me!! it was not a good use of my time but i think the reason it was so hard was because i was trying to teach myself a new skill (tailoring) by doing it on the fly without much forethought or preparation, and so i was experiencing the frustration of learning on top of just being more braindead than usual after so much job stuff. i am sincerely hoping it will be easier tomorrow.

but also i need to get better at actually breaking the spell of hyperfocus good lord. i set a million alarms and try to make myself get up to walk across the room so i can shake off the trance but my ability to tunnel-vision into a task even if i’m not working efficiently and need to STOP is insane. the gravitational pull is so strong that i get up, do whatever distraction task i’ve set for myself, and then am immediately drawn back into the original task’s orbit for another six hours.

in writing today’s letter i found a way to weave in a nice thing my friend nicole once said to me about my teaching that i think about a lot. i am not sure the letter needed it (i am under NO illusions that i understand what cover letters need!!) it but it was nice to think about her saying it & then also nice to write a slightly more earnest paragraph about Values instead of all the Professional Woman Applying for a Job Stuff. also nice to think about teaching! the other day i made a joke about how i can’t write anything short about teaching without accidentally writing the entire book that lives inside of me and one of my beloved former students messaged me to be like ‘please please please write a teaching book i want to read it 🥺.’ VERY SWEET!!! TEACHING IS A GOOD THING IN A WORLD FULL OF BAD THINGS!!!!

michelle tested positive for covid this morning after i spent a big chunk of yesterday morning with her. this is my fourth ‘very close contact’ in the past month and i haven’t gotten it from any of the others which probably means my luck is about to run out. i hope i don’t get sick but also an enforced break from job stuff might not be the worst idea. i felt fine most of today, insofar as i was aware of my body at all in the strange trance state i entered, but i am feeling a little rundown now (though possibly that’s just the power of suggestion).

i have a student meeting tomorrow that i can’t forget about for a kid who is doing the coolest/most ambitious project and has just been steadily plugging away at it for a solid 10 months now. she’s getting REALLY close now and it’s very exciting to see!!

since i have to shower and make myself presentable tomorrow anyway i’m going to make myself do this annoying two-minute video for one of the job applications. if it weren’t a job i would be super psyched about getting i would skip it but alas.

i had such a lovely pre-4th of july cookout with my friends and we discussed plans for a big celebration of our ten years in texas at the end of the summer. it made me emotional!! my beloved humans!!! i don’t know if i’ll still be living here or not (my In a Perfect World plan is to move at the beginning of august) but i will obviously return for it if not. i feel lucky to have had this really solid group of friends here who i have known for so long and love so much. emotions!!!

i had a long phone call with one of my college bffs yesterday about some heavy stuff going on in her life. she has made A Big Traumatic Life Change recently which it is causing her a lot of grief, but also, even in the immediate wake of the Big Change she sounded more like herself than she has in a year. i have been pretty worried for her for a long time now, more acutely in the past six months or so, and i feel hopeful that this is going to be a good thing in the long run. also we discussed how clarifying the long beautiful wedding weekend last month was for both of us, in different but not dissimilar ways. and i think that’s interesting! like it was powerful enough as an emotional experience to prompt both of us to independently make huge changes that are going to change the trajectories of our lives. most weddings do not have that effect on me lol but it was just one of those experiences where the two people getting married are quite simply the best people you know, and they’ve woven around themselves this dense web of deeply meaningful relationships with so many different kinds of people, and we all just got to be immersed in all of that love and goodwill and positive feeling for like four full days, and it was just the kind of emotional experience that makes you say aloud to yourself afterwards: wow, i’m ready to change my life and i’m strong enough to do it.

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sunriseverse · 2 years

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good day here’s a noncomprehenisve ripping into of every piece of writing advice i can remember right now that i hate. massive disclaimer that this is a rant based on my personal experiences etc. if you want actual advice i can give that but it’s going to be highly case specific and frankly you should take even that with a grain of salt.

- “said is dead”. i’m convinced this one largely comes from new writers who don’t know what the fuck they’re talking about, because said is a staple dialogue tag for a reason. you don’t need special emotion/tone specific words when said will work just fine if you tack on a qualifier like “quietly” or “reluctantly”. obviously the proportional amount of said to other dialogue tags is going to depend a lot on what tone you’re going for, but for the love of god do not think you have to limit your usage of said to every three paragraphs or whatever they’re saying these days.

- “get rid of filler words”. not applicable broadly. if i think about this too hard i see red. filler words exist for a reason and that reason is that it’s natural for people to use them. next.

- any sort of “emotional tells cheat sheet”. genuinely this is one of the ones i hate the most. there is no universal tell for any emotion, and relying solely on these sorts of lists will probably frustrate you and make you feel limited. you don’t even need them as an amateur writer.

- paragraph separation. every single fucking time i see a post that’s like “any time anything new happens, start a new paragraph” or “you want your writing to not have long paragraphs” it makes me violent i am not kidding. your paragraphs can have multiple things happening in them—description, dialogue, action, etc. there’s classics with page-long paragraphs and it’s not because the authors are lazy—they know what they’re fucking doing. i’m not going to tell you how to write a paragraph, but i am going to tell you that 90% of what makes a good paragraph is that it feels like it fits in with the other paragraphs. tone is one of the biggest parts of written pieces for a good reason. write two hundred word paragraphs. genuinely it doesn’t fucking matter. just do use paragraph breaks and don’t turn everything into a single wall of text.

- punctuation. oh my fucking god the amount of shit punctuation advice i see. look. as long as it fits tonally, you can do basically what you want with punctuation and it will not matter. in fact it’ll probably contribute to the atmosphere of the writing! “run on” sentences are good. interrupted dialogue is good. “over usage” of commas, em dashes, semi colons, all of that is fine. if i see one more post where the “desirable” sentence examples look like they came out of a grammatical workbook i’m going to bash my head in.

- “show, don’t tell”. every single show don’t tell post i’ve seen tries to instruct you how to do it and it’s bullshit. it’s fucking bullshit. show don’t tell is highly specific to your writing style. if someone with a different writing style from me tried to use my show don’t tell tactics it’s wouldn’t work and vice versa. show don’t tell us also genre and tone specific—it’s going to look different in sci-fi than in thriller than in high fantasy than in americana than in historical fiction. it’s going to look different depending on your pov choice, and the fucking tenses you use.

- every single characterisation advice i’ve ever seen oh my god. this is probably the product of a general preference for action driven plots over character driven plots but fuck me your characterisation should drive things because your story is about the characters. i know this is going to sound like i’m self interested as a character writer but for the love of god characterisation is key. if your plot doesn’t work without discarding characterisation (i do not mean plot forcing a characterisation change, that’s normal and a part of character growth etc), change your fucking plot.

- anything telling you that you have to change your writing style to be “correct”. this probably encompasses a couple other points but i don’t fucking care at this point. your style is the cornerstone of your writing. it will naturally shift over time as you change as a person, but trying to for yourself to “correct” it is stupid. use “big” words. use “complicated” sentences. use words to mean things that are opposite to their connotations or, fuck, even opposite to their meanings. reuse phrases. spend twice as long as you need to on descriptions.

- single paragraph of advice: write. just write. ignore rule sheets, ignore what you’ve been taught, ignore whatever the fuck listicles of quotes from stephen king and stephanie meyer and whoever the fuck else they’re putting on there says. write as much as you can stand and you will learn from it. you will develop a style, you will develop tricks for dialogue and description and emotion and pacing and tone. but it won’t happen if you don’t fucking write. your first attempts will be bad—god knows mine were. but there’s nowhere to go but up. write.

#c.txt

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wanderingaldecaldo · 11 months

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Find the Word/Manuscript Search Tag

Tagged by @setaflow (wait, wind, teeth, hope) and @fly-amanitaa (safe, breathe, regret, light) -- thank you both! This one looked like a lot of fun so I'm excited to give it a go! I'm using my three most recent WIPs -- the corpo AU longfic, and two PWPs that are based on prompts I received in April -- one will be the next in the Streetkid Val series, and one is post corpo AU longfic.

Results and tags after the cut bc it got long 😂

wait

This is from the corpo AU longfic, and the clear winner -- three times in three paragraphs lmao

[Mitch] steps into the apartment, again feeling out of place. He decides to take her up on the offer and orders a coffee from the vending machine, then pulls out a stool at the bar and waits. The quality of the coffee disappoints him—bitter and burnt—but then he’s been spoiled by camp coffee his whole adult life.

He glances around the penthouse as he waits. It looks the same as it did before, everything in perfect place. He wonders if she even lives here because the place feels sterile. He’s not sure he’s seen anything that looks remotely like her.

A set of matching suitcases wait by the elevator—four of them, matte black with shiny silver accents, two large and two smaller.

wind

This was an interesting one because of the homonyms, and I had "wind" as in twisting, but I was hoping for "wind" as air current, and I found one in the corpo longfic!

Her eyes crinkle as the smile returns and his breath quickens, and as an excuse to look away he digs his cigarettes from his pockets. He leans back on the couch and exhales smoke at the tent ceiling. She makes no moves to fill the silence and he’s thankful. They’ve sat in silence plenty on her visits to camp, and he always finds it welcome; hardly a moment’s peace around camp, and he appreciates the break from chatter.

His chest aches as his thoughts turn to the first time they sat like this, when she stayed behind on the bridge despite his wishes to the contrary. He’d wanted solitude for his sorrow, but then she grabbed a chair and sat there beside him, nothing between them but the tinkle of glass and slosh of beer and the wind.

teeth

Ohhh it was hard to pick one because, yeah... but I was good 😏 Also from the corpo longfic

“If that’s what it takes to get you in a suit,” she says and gives him another full smile.

His stomach twists and his cheeks warm and he looks away. He’d thought he was over that little crush he’d developed after Scorp died, but after the last half hour he’s no longer sure. Suddenly spending a month with her in a hotel room seems like a questionable decision.

“Uh, something I should probably ask first. We’ll have two beds, right?”

“What, you don’t wanna snuggle? I’m a good snuggler,” she says, pulling her bottom lip between her teeth as she grins at him. Cheeks burning hotter, he shakes his head and scoffs though he can’t stop his mouth from curving up. “Yes, we’ll have two beds. Already talked to my contact about some of the detes and a two bedroom suite is a firm requirement for me taking the contract.”

hope

...and another from the corpo longfic.

The boxing match quiets and the chair wheels squeak as Vik rolls over on it. “How ya feeling, kid?”

Mitch guffaws. “Kid? Been a minute since anyone called me that. Don’t think you have that many years on me.”

Vik laughs, a rich sound that fills the room. “Know I do, Mitch. You forget, I got your medical records right here. Had hair on my balls before you were born.”

“Heh, hope to look as good at your age,” he answers without thinking. Vik blushes, and Mitch does too, and he quickly changes the subject. “’m feeling okay, just a bit of a headache, some nausea.”

safe

Heyyyy from something else! This is from the "rough or gentle" prompt which ofc turned into something angsty bc that's just how things are with Streetkid Val 😬

“C’mon, city girl. Not gonna kill you.”

Normally when he calls her “city girl” she loves it; beyond just another term of affection, something about the way he says it makes her tremble. But this time, it feels like an insult rather than affection so she scowls and crosses her arms.

“How do you know?”

“Because it’s from deep underground, away from any ground pollution. Had a well on the farm; grew up drinking the stuff. Promise it’s safe. ’Sides, they test it regularly.”

breathe

Another from corpo longfic. I promise I'm searching the others first lol this one just has a higher chance since it's 30-120x the words of the other two lmao

She nods again, then jerks her chin at him. “Can I get one of those?”

“’Course.”

He pulls out the pack and taps one out for her to take. Just as he reaches out with the lighter intent on passing it to her, she leans forward, cigarette between her fingers and poised at her ruby lips, and her emerald eyes flick to his. He works on autopilot, leaning forward with the lighter, cupping the flame with his silicone fingers and he forgets to breathe when her fingers linger on his. She flicks her eyes back up to him once more and the air whooshes out of his lungs as if he’s been hit by a freight train, or jumped into the farm pond on a sunny March day.

regret

Yep, another one that only showed up in the longfic...

The door to the backroom slides open at her approach. Nix’s office is dark, but he doesn’t usually show until afternoon anyway. Once inside the quiet of her office, she drops into the chair with a heavy sigh. She tabs through pages of email but nothing catches her interest. She leans back in her chair, puffing her cheeks as she blows out a long breath. She drags her eyes down from the ceiling, landing on Scorpion’s action figure.

In a flash she’s standing, figure in hand, breath tight in her chest. She wants to crush it, destroy it and the memories of the last few weeks, but she knows she will regret it—not today, today she would feel relief but one day when her feelings have settled she will think back to that day on the bridge and feel sorrow at having destroyed the memento of lost friendship, no matter what passed since. Instead of throwing it in the incinerator she shoves it in a drawer, hidden behind decades worth of paperwork she’s never read.

light

...and why not wrap things up with one more from the longfic lol

The cool air feels delicious on his face, flushed as it is from the alcohol and her incessant flirting. The attention makes him feel a decade younger, at least. He pulls away from her to light a cigarette and offers the pack. When she accepts he holds out the lighter and holds his breath, hoping for an errant touch of her hand. She obliges, holding the cigarette in her right hand and placing the left on the skin of his wrist as she leans in. Her eyes flicker up to his, and her fingers linger a fraction of a second too long and his skin tingles. Suddenly he remembers the cartoons he used to watch with his mom, how the tricked coyote would speed off the cliff without realizing it, and only after looking down would gravity take hold, leaving the coyote to plummet to the ground far below.

Tagging with zero pressure/sorry if you got tagged already... @impishbiscuit @schoute @oranzuwu @elvenbeard @chessalein @morganlefaye79 @theviridianbunny @corphoe and anyone else sees this and wants to play (and tag me if you do!!) I give you the words:

alarm, calm, hold, water

#cyberpunk fanfic #cyberpunk 2077 fanfic #wash's writing #tag meme #thank you for the tags!

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adultswim2021 · 1 year

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Tim and Eric Awesome Show Great Job #19: “Pepperoni” | January 21, 2008 - 12:15AM | S02E09

Another great episode. This one is jam-packed, and has a substantial amount of deleted or alternate sketches associated with it. That’s good for me, because I hate when these write-ups are just me pointing out funny things. What am I, Jay Leno’s famous Headlines segment from The Tonight Show Starring Jay Leno on NBC? Did you know that one of the worst things I ever saw on television was him pointing out intentional humor in a Papa Johns print ad? At least I think it was Papa Johns. Hey, remember when Tim and Eric did that Papa Johns thing in that thing? Nice. I’m back on track. Thanks for sticking with me.

Do you wonder why this episode is called “Pepperoni”? Well, wonder no more. This one starts off with a very brief cold open that reprises Tom Goes to the Mayor in live-action! In it, the Mayor gets increasingly frustrated with Roy Teppert for turning on his discman every time the Mayor uses his pointing stick to turn it off. The punchline is we cut to Tom Peters at the door, looking awkward.

What does that have to do with “Pepperoni?” Why did I do a paragraph break before giving support for my thesis statement? Well, I’ll tell you: there was originally MUCH more to this sketch. Seemingly this was meant to be the wraparound for the episode. There are two more deleted scenes from this sketch where Tom is clutching a pepperoni stick, and they get into a gentleman’s wager over weather or not that pepperoni would go well with a Cheese Pizza. I’m not entirely sure why these got the axe. They are pretty funny and I think they should’ve banked them for another episode. I guess it’s good that these guys generally like looking forward with their material, but I would’ve been all for them returning to the Tomiverse for more live-action mayubernatorial fun.

The runner of this episode revolves around Bread Harrity, famous for being my friend C-Dog’s Geocities username. Bread is a Mediterranean man who loves entertaining children with songs about Spaghetti and Meatballs. This series of sketches is actually focused on the Breadheads, two trashy trailer park women who adore and desperately want to become Bread’s sexual partners. They openly talk about how much they hate their children and their current stations in life. It’s weird how disgusting some of the lines are in this sketch, only to have the relatively innocuous “bush” be bleeped out. I’ve always taken issue with that! This ends with the girls finally meeting their idol, and coming off too desperate and creepy when they sing a song about becoming his love slaves. He backs off, because he simply wants to “do it in the dark” (for some reason this line has reverberated in my head for the past decade and a half).

There’s also another Kids Break that, like most of them, fails to recapture the magic of the first one. But that’s okay. They put a fun twist on this by calling it a “teen edition” and Tim & Eric have aged their characters up slightly. They are cool bad boys in this one. Originally this was conceived in a similar vein to the previous Kids Break sketches, and the deleted “preppy” version can be found on the DVD in the special features.

Hobby Holes features Fred Armisen as K.J. Nutt, a man with a British accent who just loves holes in the dirt and wants to teach you all about them. This sketch is fine, but it does feature one of the more sublime moments: K.J. Nutt is reciting the contents of a letter telling him he can’t make a hole in a piece of paper, but for some reason the graphics on screen show a complete letter with an opening salutation and closing valediction while the body only reads one single line: “You silly man.” without the rest of the text. I don’t know if I did any kind of job relaying this joke, but it’s one of my favorite bits in the entire series.

This sketch is reprised with embarrassing behind-the-scenes footage of the host freaking out, which is becoming formulaic at this point (Pussy Doodles, Crystal Shyps, probably others that I’m forgetting, all did this same thing). I might not have noticed this trend if it weren’t for the fact that this instance of it doesn’t do too much to add to the sketch. Nothing tops “You silly man.” for me.

Hey, we got Brules Rules. In this one he instructs everyone to just eat ants that get on your picnic food, because they are made out of protein. I genuinely remember being taught this during cub scout camp, and a teenage counselor actually ate an ant in front of us. I remember thinking, “I’ll be damned. I guess you can eat those things.” I still never have, at least not on purpose.

Video Match: Rainn Wilson is back! YIKES! This isn’t particularly inspired; he’s basically just saying Dwight style stuff about being a gamer. BORE-ING.

There’s “Writin’ a jingle for Tom Skerrit.” which sorta exists in the canon of “Tim & Eric dicking around at the Abso Lutely offices”. This one actually has a ghastly surprise; after work-shopping their ideas for a Tom Skerrit jingle (for what purpose exactly is never explained), we pan over to see a tired-looking Tom Skerrit, who walks out on the meeting, unimpressed with Tim or Eric. Tim scolds him for wasting their time, and Tom offers back “you didn’t do a good job”. Great Job.

This one notably ends with The Shins playing over the credits, doing a cover of the “Never gonna Wipe My Butt” song. I remember thinking maybe this song originated on stage or something, or that I’d heard of it before this episode. Turns out I may have: The Shins performed it in late 2007 and a video of the performance made its way onto Youtube around then. It’s possible Tim & Eric debuted the song during a live show, but I must be thinking of this. They probably started performing it after recording their version for Tim & Eric in this episode.

There’s one more deleted sketch; at least I’m choosing to attribute it to this episode because Tim & Eric are dressed in their same wardrobe as they were in the Tom Skerrit sketch. It’s given some title like “BEHIND THE SCENES” and in it, Tim & Eric present an actual lost sketch to the audience: the deleted Gibbons and Friendy cartoon. We see this briefly in season one’s “Friends”, shown on a television screen for a few seconds. So, the reason they didn’t include it on the season one DVD was because they filmed a new intro for it for season two and deleted it again.

Shout out to this great Youtube channel which has playlsits of Tim & Eric DVD extras. I’m a lover of physical media because of great extras like this, but I’m also pro people uploading DVD extras to YouTube so everyone can enjoy them. Go find the other deleted scenes I mentioned there!

#adult swim #adultswim2021 #tim and eric awesome show great job #pizza

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