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#anyway sorry for all the rambling in the tags i am so tired
bonesandthebees · 6 months
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man I'm glad I decided to read a game of thrones as a way to take notes for how to write rose... I just read about a huge battle with thousands of soldiers and it was so well done... now am I going to write a battle? no fucking way I don't hate myself that much but I know HOW to execute it in a very easy to visualize way and that's what's important
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absurdumsid · 27 days
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HI SILLY CREATURES ON MY PHONE !! GOOD EVENING !?!!! IM BACK IT WAS FUN IM SORRY I COULDNT BLOG DURING IT (I WAS BUSY.... UM. ADMIRING SOMEONE TEEHEE) ANYWAY !! I WILL PWRHPAS DRAW TOMORROW !?!?!!!!
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thats from my calmer playlist lmao i just realised i rarely post songs from those playlists
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landfilloftrash · 1 year
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the general consensus I feel like.
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rosesradio · 2 years
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we really were seconds away. us ej stans got this close to getting to see a breakdown. and it has been snatched away from us once again. ships aside, ej nation how are we feeling
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livehexmoments · 9 months
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SO...Here it is. My biggest fanfic yet and for the hex...focusing on a character that had less than 5 minutes of screentime (and died :( ) and here i am shipping him with the revenge hungry bartender and cold hearted groonda (ill come up with a good title for it later) I enjoyed writing and rewriting this fic even though it was painful to get through at times. Is it the best it can be? Probably not FWEGRWEGH Some general cws for character death, mention of nsfw (nothing explicitly shown, but it is implied/mentioned), and drinking/someone getting drunk (lemme know if i missed any!!)
Also no joke, this is 11,100 words and in google docs, it amounts to 29 pages. This is pretty long and splitting up into chapters just didnt feel right so it’s all underneath the “Keep reading”. If you are not prepared to read through the entire thing, i understand completely and hope you have a nice day wherever you are <3. If so, I do hope you enjoy it !! :)!
Rootbeer Tender. 
Personally, Jay never heard of the game until he overheard a bunch of Groondas talk about it. From what he gathered, the game itself was said to be like a janky arcade game that played like it was made by a toddler. The only reason why a bunch of Gameworks employees go there (other than for a job) is because of a quaint little tavern that serves the best root beer around. Jay, finding himself curious, decided to go to the bar himself to see if it held up to that standard. What else was he doing other than cleaning? He could use a nice root beer. The forest loomed over him as he approached the inn. Although the inn looked welcoming, the jankiness and unpolished look made him feel a bit out of place. The lights were dimmed and the moon hung in the woods, omitting an eerie glow. Jay knew it was late and they were probably closed, but this was his only time off. He had to at least try a rootbeer. But as soon as he got to the door, he felt himself getting cold feet. They probably were closed, so why bother whoever’s working there now? As he turned to walk back to the base, he heard the door open behind him. 
Jay turns around to see what looked to be the barkeep, holding the door open with a warm smile. Peering from behind his legs was this weird looking…Groonda? Jay couldn’t tell, but it was hunched over with an annoyed expression on its face. Jay looked anxious as he stuttered,
“Oh I’m terribly sorry. I-I was just- Well, I was just leaving so I’ll come back tomorrow when you’re open-”
The barkeep interrupted, “Leave? After you came all the way from the base? I don’t mind pouring one more glass.”
Jay grinned nervously. While the barkeep’s kindness was something he can appreciate, the idea of making these two work overtime for him? Well that was just rude in Jay’s opinion. 
“Oh, that’s very kind of you, but really I should get going. You both look like you need some sleep.” Jay stuttered out as he tried to walk off. Apparently, the barkeep was having none of it and took a step forward to grab Jay by the shoulders with one arm. Jay’s face flushed as the bartender started to lead him into the tavern. 
“Nonsense! Come right in, take a seat, please!” The barkeep paused his movements to look at the smaller man who Jay swore was giving him a dirty look. “Jeremiah, would you mind fetching another barrel from the basement?” The barkeep asked with a warm smile on his face.
Jeremiah nods wordlessly and he heads down into the basement.
Meanwhile, The bartender leads Jay to a stool and he sits down. Jay takes the moment to look around the inn while the bartender gets a glass ready. It was homey. The gramophone in the corner of the room was playing a song that Jay will have stuck in his head for days. The sudden voice of the bartender interrupted his musings,
“So mister, how do you take your rootbeer?” Jay looked over to him. Jeremiah was already back (Jay swore he didn’t hear him come back) and was setting up a barrel on the far side of the room. The bartender was looking at him with a patient smile. Jay quickly glanced away, not used to anyone showing him such patience or kindness.
“I never had a rootbeer before.” He nervously said, rubbing the back of his head.
The bartender looks surprised. “Never had a root beer?!” He exclaimed in shock. Jay nodded, still looking away from him. The barkeep hummed and quickly went over to the barrel. “Well, I’ll just make the First Timer’s special.” 
Before Jay can even ask what that is, he watches in awe as the barkeep makes his drink so fast that by time he slides it over for Jay to catch, Jay misses and the drink falls on the floor. The loud glass shattering makes Jay winces as he fearfully looks over to the bartender who was just staring at him. 
“I-I’m so so sorry! I’ll clean it myself or I can just leave if you want-” His apologies were interrupted by the barkeep laughing loudly. His face flushes in embarrassment as he gets up from his seat to leave. The bartender slows down his laughing to motion Jay to sit back down.
“Oh you’re fine! It was just an accident, no need to be embarrassed. It’s my fault anyway. I keep forgetting sometimes not all my customers are familiar with my game.” The barkeep said sheepishly as he made another drink. Jay sits back down hesitantly, still looking at the mess.
“Do you still want me to clean it?”
“Hm? Oh, of course not! Jeremiah will take care of it.”
Right on cue, Jeremiah is already sweeping up the glass. Jay frowns, looking at the annoyed and tired expression on his face with sympathy. He recalled those late nights where some idiots decided to make a big mess at 2 am and Irving had forced Jay to stay overtime to clean it, making the same expression as Jeremiah’s. The bartender turns around with the remade drink in hand, only to find his patron was helping Jeremiah with the mess, using a nearby mop to clean up the drink. It was a welcome surprise to see Jeremiah seemingly having a conversation with a customer, especially one so skittish and anxious as Jay. Their conversation gets interrupted by the barkeep.
“What game are you from?” The barkeep asked curiously as he put Jay’s drink down where he sat. Both of them looked at him. 
“Well…I’m just the janitor at the Gameworks base, sir. I wasn’t created from a game initially.” Jay stated, finishing up his cleaning and handing the mop to Jeremiah to put away. He sat down at his seat.
“Really? Well, I’m shocked.” The barkeep sounded genuine. He pulled up a stool from behind him to sit across from Jay. “And here I thought all characters were made for some type of game.”
“That’s kind of true? I mean, we all get used for games eventually. But in the meantime, some characters just work around the base. I-I have a friend who’s just a mechanic. She just makes sure things work right in games and anywhere else.” Jay took a sip of his drink. His eyes widened as the sweet flavor of the root beer covered his taste buds. He takes another sip, this time a bit longer, just to savor it. The barkeep chuckles at the sight of it, glad that he was able to satisfy another customer. 
“So? Was it good?”
“Better than good! This is the sweetest drink I’ve ever had in my life. Probably the best root beer I’ve ever had too, and it’s my first time drinking one.”
“Well, I’m glad to hear it!” The barkeep says with a proud grin. “You know, I just realized we never even properly introduced ourselves.”
“Oh- uh, my bad, I-”
“Friend, don’t worry about it! My name is Rootbeer Reginald, but please just call me Reggie. The little guy over there,” he pointed towards Jeremiah, who was putting away the mop and cleaning supplies. “His name is Jeremiah, that’s my janitor.” 
Jay tilted his head a bit at Reggie, who looked at him with a smile.
“...Your first name is Rootbeer?”
The smile faltered a bit as Reggie laughed nervously.
“No, not really. It’s just what I’m called. The only thing I serve in this tavern is root beer, you know?”
“Yes, but…You just said your name is “Rootbeer Reginald” so excuse me if I find it hard to believe you. Also, it sounds like something Lionel would make up for a character name.” Jay snickered watching the bartender’s face flushed in embarrassment and annoyance. 
“Well! It doesn’t matter because I insist you just call me Reggie. Enough about my name, what’s yours?”
“Jay.”
“Jay…that’s a nice name.” The barkeep holds his hand towards Jay, who shakes it. 
“It’s better than having RootBeer as a first name.” Jay says in a jokey tone, feeling the little root beer in his system. He expects Reggie to get furious, but is a bit shocked to see him look annoyed but still smiling. 
“Oh knock it off! At least I have a last name.”
“Which is also a first name..”
Reginald and Jay laugh together at the absurdity of it. As the night goes on, Jay finds himself becoming more comfortable. Reginald was a great conversationalist, listening to Jay with a warm smile. Jeremiah wasn’t too bad either. The little guy was sitting with them, quietly listening along and only talking unless spoken to. Jay made a mental note to maybe get to know him better when he came to the tavern again.
...
As Jay finished his drink, he felt a bit sad that he had to leave. If he wasn’t there by sunrise, Irving would kill him. 
“Again, I’m sorry I came here so late. I hope I didn’t screw up your sleep schedule or anything.” Jay watched as Reggie waved him off, finishing his cleaning and putting the stool back.
“Oh, don’t worry about it. I forgot how nice it is just to have some company. Not to say you’re not good company, Jeremiah!” Reggie laughs as Jeremiah rolls his eyes. Jay laughs along, a warm smile on his usually depressed face. As he waved goodbye to them and bid them good night, Jay was sure this wouldn’t be the last he would see of them.
“I hate Irving so much. Oh ‘mir, I wish I can just get reassigned to your game so I wouldn’t have to deal with his fucking BULLSHIT!!” Jay yelled as he gulped down his fifth drink. Reggie sighed as he cleaned a dirty glass and watched Jay, feeling sorry for the guy.
“Language, Jay.” Jeremiah said in a monotone voice, taking a seat on the bar next to Jay. 
Jay was clearly shitfaced, having drank about 5 root beers in one go. His face was flushed red with his hair looking messed up. When he finished, he slammed the glass on the bar, almost breaking it. 
“Sorry, sorry, I-I’m just so tired. I don’t understand how you two can stand the asshole. Bossing us around, treating us like garbage, he doesn’t care. He never did.” Jay hiccuped, tears running down his face as he choked back drunken sobs. Jeremiah rubbed his back to comfort him. Reggie took the glass away from Jay, cleaning it already.
“Can-Can I have another?”
“No. I’m cutting you off, Jay. As a friend, I will not allow you to die of root beer poisoning.” Reggie puts the now cleaned glass away and walks over to the other side of the bar, sitting next to Jay on the other side. “And I think Irving…I think he’s just stressed. He has a lot on his plate and I’m sure he cares. I don’t think it’s right he’s taking it out on you though, but I can talk to him about it. He visits sometimes.”
Reggie’s smile fades as Jay turns to look straight at him. 
“You don’t- You just don’t- What the hell is wrong with you?! Can’t you comprehend that Irving doesn’t like us?” Jay laughs a bit manically as Reggie frowns. Jeremiah behind him growls a bit, becoming defensive. 
“Reginald just sees the good in people, Jay. Nothing wrong with that.”
“But you of all people should know! I…”
Jay looks at both of them, and suddenly grabs their hands. 
“I just want what’s best for you two. You’re the only friends I have and I’m terrified of ending up alone.” As Jay is saying this, he is glancing back and forth at Reggie and Jeremiah, gripping their hands tighter. While Jeremiah looks confused with his face red, Reggie smiles gently and rubs Jay’s knuckles. 
“Your concern is appreciated, Jay. I assure you that I’m not mad, you’re drunk and stressed and sometimes you gotta let it out! I know I do that sometimes.” Reggie laughs softly. Jay can feel Jeremiah squeeze his hand a bit. “But Jeremiah and I aren’t going anywhere. You’re our friend, Jay. You’ll always have a place here at the inn. Anytime. Maybe I’ll convince Irving to let you work here. I could always use more help around here. Certainly would lessen the load, right Jeremiah?”
Jeremiah spoke up, “Yes. It would be nice to have a second pair of hands around.” 
Jay sniffled as he stood up from his chair, a shaky and bittersweet smile on his face.
“Thank you. I mean it, truely, thank you. I have- I have to leave. See you tomorrow?” 
Reggie noticed how much he wobbled as he stood and looked at him concerned.
“Are you sure you can even make it back? I’m happy to let you sleep in the cabin for the night.”
“I’m fineee, better than fine. I feel great. You two always make me feel better. With your kindness and…no nonsense attitude.” Jay giggles at that for some reason. He notices how he was still holding their hands, clearly not letting go. But instead of just letting go and apologizing like he normally would, his drunken mind decided to embrace the homoerotic nature of it all and kiss their cheeks instead. Letting go of their hands, he walks out of the tavern, yelling good night to them and saying he loves them while laughing. What Jay didn’t see was their flushed faces and sudden realization that maybe their friendship wasn’t so platonic afterall. 
...
Several years have passed since that night.
Jay sighed as he cleaned the floor of the temple, staring at the reflection of the shiny clean floor.
He didn’t know why his mind decided to drift back to his memories of the inn. Hearing the songs on the gramophone, the smell of rootbeer, and the laughter of the barkeep after Jay told him a joke.
He really did miss Reggie. His warm smile. How he always knew what to say and what advice to give. How he would so gently put his hand on Jay’s shoulder after crying and complaining about a long day of work.
Even Jeremiah, for as creepy and cold the little guy could be, there was something in there. They both could relate to the horrid treatment they faced at the hands of Gamefuna (especially in regards to Irving). There were moments, Jay recalled, where Jeremiah would let down his cold exterior to reveal a much softer side of him. One that would grab your hand and never let go. One who concerns himself over every little thing, worries over your safety and well being and-
Jay’s eyes widened at his sudden realization. He was in love with them, wasn’t he? Was he that repressed he couldn’t acknowledge it? Why did he hesitate for so long? If he had just confessed sooner, if he just wasn't a coward, would things be different? Would he not feel so alone anymore?
The truth is, Jay thought as his hands began to tremble a bit, that it wouldn’t have mattered. They vanished long before Jay could even rationalize his true feelings towards them. Apparently moved to a different game but he didn’t believe that. Not after Irving told him with an almost relieved and cruel face. And what difference would it make if he told? It wouldn’t have lasted, in fact it would have made everything worse. Imagine confessing the two people who made him the happiest in the world and they accepted him, or rejected him in a soft way. Jay knows for a fact Reggie is far too kind to reject someone coldly. It’s not like him to be cruel. Jeremiah would go along with whatever Reggie would say, so maybe he had a shot. Who knows but the point is it would always be the same fate. Happiness then nothing. 
There was no stopping Rootbeer Tender’s shut down, complete erasure from Lionel’s portfolio. Why? Because he was the first, the less polished game? What a sick joke. All of Lionel’s games were unpolished travesties, Rootbeer Tender was no different. The game…no, not just the game. Reggie and Jeremiah did not deserve whatever Irving did to them. Jay should have been there. He could have tried to prevent it. Even if he couldn’t, he could have given one more goodbye, he could have-
Jay’s thoughts halted when he saw droplets of water on the floor. He shakily touched his face to feel some wetness on his cheeks. He was crying. He quickly started to wipe his eyes and sniff up his snot when he heard the door opening. Thankfully it wasn’t Chandrelle, but the great sage doing his routine checks. The sage stopped in front of Jay.
“Are you alright?”
“Yes, I’m fine. Just allergies.”
“Ah, I see.”
The sage quickly looked around to make sure everything was in order and walked away to the door. All the while, Jay’s memories of the inn and the two owners he adored kept haunting him. All he can do is mop the same spot, over and over, lost in the images of happier days and the regrets he had. A voice suddenly spoke up, it was the sage.
“Jay?”
“Hm?”
“...You missed a spot near the altar.”
And with that the Sage left and closed the door. Jay threw his mop on the floor and softly sobbed in his hands, standing alone in the temple.
...
It was almost ironic how much Lazarus reminded Jay of himself that day. Crying alone in the temple where no one would hear him, wishing to go back to the days of old. Yet never realizing how the past was not much better than the present. Jay watched Lazarus from the slightly opened door of his room, softly sobbing in his hands and trembling as every sob choked out of his throat. He didn’t mean to stumble upon such a private moment. He was just trying to get away from Junior, who had been arguing with him all day about wanting to handle the explosives (which Jay knows from experience, will only end in disaster). 
As he was heading to his own room, he heard the sobs and had to peek in. As much as Jay would want to comfort him, he knew better. Lazarus was a very private person. Rarely expressing any emotion other than a depressed frown and emotionless eyes. He never let anyone in his room nor did he talk about how he felt about things, just went along with whatever Jay or Junior said. It concerned Jay how loyal and unquestioning Lazarus could be, but supposed it was because of his days as a knight. It was hard to recode an entire character after all, or at least he heard Irving complain about it one time. Still, Jay decided to softly sigh and attempt to leave him alone. 
Unfortunately, the door creaked just loud enough and opened only enough for Lazarus to stop and look up at Jay. Jay could see his horrified face staring at him, silently pleading with him not to tell and leave. At this moment, Jay could have walked up to him and comforted him, telling him that it’s all going to be okay, they’ll get out eventually. But what good would lying do? He wasn’t even sure Lazarus’s plan of going to that “Six Pint Inn'' would even work. However, as much as Jay’s instincts told him to walk away and avoid an awkward confrontation, staring at the poor ex-knight with sickly pale green skin and red eyes made him realize that taking the coward’s path was a horrible option. So he opted to compromise. 
Slowly entering the room, he pulled out a clean rag from his armor (he always carried one or two around to clean the blood from his suit) and handed it to Lazarus. He softly sighed as Lazarus took the rag with an unreadable expression. 
“If you ever need to talk, uh, about anything, I’ll listen. I won’t tell Junior anything, it’s none of his business.” There was an awkward pause. Lazarus simply stared at him and Jay had to look away, turning around to head out the room. Before Jay can leave, he heard Lazarus speak up softly.
“Thank you. You’re a good man, Jay.” 
Jay glanced at Lazarus, who he noticed was giving a small smile as he wiped his eyes. Jay smiled back at him and nodded, leaving the room. It was a small gesture, but it was enough. Mir’, Jay hoped it was enough. 
...
Walking through the forest path felt familiar to Jay. Following behind Lazarus, he couldn’t help but to look around, desperately trying to remember if he had ever walked down this path. The storm raging on didn’t help with this process. As the thunder boomed and lightning cracked down from the sky, his thought process stopped and he jumped a little. Junior, who was walking beside him, laughed.
“Aw, what’s the matter? You’re scared of a little storm?”
“No! I was just startled, that’s all.”
“Uh-huh.” Junior said with a smug smirk.
Lazarus barely turned around to engage in their shenanigans. He gave a small glance before motioning them to pick up the pace. Jay frowned at this. He always worried about Lazarus. Poor guy was never the same after what happened in Secrets of Legendaria. 
After a bit of walking, Lazarus stopped in front of the inn.
“..We’re here.”
While Junior was complaining about how small the inn actually was and Lazarus was knocking on the door, Jay’s eyes widened in realization. 
This was Rootbeer Tender. It had to be. He turned to his right to see the cabin, a few paces away. There was no mistaking it. That was Reggie’s cabin, clearly seeing better days, but still intact. Could this mean that he’s…alive? Was he truly replaced by someone else?
Lazarus’s voice cut through his thoughts.
“Jay!” He turned to look at him.
“Come on, the door’s open.” “...Right.”
Jay took a deep breath and adjusted his helmet. He entered the inn.
The place was far different to what he remembered of it. The rows of bars were gone, replaced with only one in the center of the room. The most striking change was the giant mirror behind the bar. But it was disgusting, the dust made it impossible to see a clear reflection. He noticed even more little details, like the vending machine on the far right of the room, and even a door that leads to what looked to be a kitchen. A kitchen was the strangest thing to Jay. He remembered how bad Reggie’s cooking was, even if the man himself would never admit it was. Speaking of Reggie, he did notice the portrait of him and Jeremiah. Jay would never say it outloud but he couldn’t help it, the portrait just reminded him of how handsome Reggie was (and Jeremiah, but he couldn’t get a good look at him. He almost laughed to see how the photo cut him off due to his height).
Lazarus and Junior were already making themselves known. Junior walks over to Weasel Kid, interrupting an one sided conversation between him and the weird old man in survivor gear. Jay watched as Junior said something so funny apparently it made the kid laugh. Out of all people, he did not expect to see Weasel Kid end up here. Lazarus was sitting on the stool, talking to someone he couldn’t see from where he was standing. So he glanced around to see if anyone else was here.
He saw what looked like a fighting character. Jay had to think for a moment to remember the fighter’s name. Bryce, Jay remembered, that was his name. He remembered his one fight with Steambot Willy. He never got the chance to really talk to him during that fight or when he saw Bryce walking around base. But from the memories of Bryce waving to him every time they acknowledged each other’s existence, he always seemed nice enough. He looked to be talking quietly to Chandrelle. So that’s what happened to them, Jay thought to himself. He can see why Lazarus was so adamant on going here. Chandrelle looked about the same as Jay remembered. He’s almost grateful that she hasn't recognized him or Junior yet. Junior especially, remembering that talk with Lazarus and him confessing what she did to Moji. Jay never understood why Lazarus would still see any good in her, but Jay supposes that being her swordsman has something to do with it. 
Jay finally decides to stop standing in the entrance, as his feet were starting to hurt and he didn’t want to draw any attention to himself. He took a seat next to where Bryce and Chandrelle were standing, keeping his back turned to them to watch Lazarus talk to the bartender. The bartender was-
. . .
Jay’s eyes widened as he recognized him. Rootbeer Regianld himself. For Mir’s sake, what happened to him? He looked much older than Jay could ever have imagined, with wrinkles on his face and dark shadows under his eyes. He was supposed to be a year or two younger than Jay. They joked about that a lot. His hair was receding a bit and he noticed the wheelchair Reggie was sitting in. Jay looked at the portrait on the wall and back at the barkeep, wondering why the years were seemingly so cruel to him. Jay hoped to whatever creator was behind the screen that Jeremiah didn’t look much worse. Jay’s thoughts were interrupted by Junior’s impatient yelling.
“JAY! Man, what the hell is wrong with you?!”
Jay realized that all eyes were on him. The confused stares of patrons, Lazarus’s concerned stare, Junior’s frustrated look, and Reggie’s emotionless face made Jay more and more uncomfortable. Jay shook his head and stood straighter.
“S-Sorry, what were you saying?”
Reginald spoke up and Jay noticed how much rougher his voice sounded.
“I was saying that you three are needed in the attic. Take the elevator. Weasel Kid will be there to guide you, isn’t that right?”
“Whatever.”
Jay followed the three onto the elevator. There was a moment before the elevator moved where he and Reggie locked eyes. Neither one broke it as the elevator slowly moved up. It was clear that Reginald recognized him yet Jay can sense a disbelief in his face as well. The thoughts stuck with Jay, long after the elevator reached the 2nd floor and the group followed Weasel to the attic.
...
Jay never recalled the old inn even having an attic, let alone a second floor. His way up to the attic was filled with him looking around the decor and rooms the place had. Reginald and Jeremiah never had good taste in decoration, let alone ones that fit, but for what it was, it was decent. Though, Jay probably would have done a better job. He was grateful that the way up was an awkward silence, although Junior and Weasel would mutter amongst themselves, discussing whatever that didn’t concern Jay. It was when they reached the attic that Jay came across another familiar face. Although he was in robes and his face was hidden, Jay had no doubts that it was Jeremiah. There weren’t a lot of small, hunched over people with a robe such as his that Jay knew. As Jeremiah turned around to face them, he noticed a small patch on the robe. Did something happen to him..? Those thoughts would have to wait as Jeremiah spoke,
“Ah…So you finally arrived. Early, I might add. I thought we agreed to debrief tomorrow, Lazarus?”
“The sooner, the better. I want to get this over with.” There was a small pause as Jeremiah let out a pleased hum.
“I understand. I think you made a good call. Now, let us go over the plan.”
Jeremiah unceremoniously took off the robe. He looked pretty much the same as he used to, only with a similar patch on his suit. Jay breathed a small sigh of relief. He didn’t know how he would react if Jeremiah looked as bad as Reggie did. As everyone gathered around the table, Jay noticed how he stared at him for a brief second only to start discussing the plan like nothing happened.
It seemed like a good plan. Everyone does their part, they steal the artifact, get out, then bomb the base and everyone inside. Irving would die (maybe? He didn’t sound so sure about it) and they would be back at the inn safely. Weasel would find his own way and sneak into the sewers, carrying the bomb and blowing up column A when the time was right. Junior would clear out any soldiers to prevent a flank, Lazarus would help when necessary, and Jay was in charge of disarming the security system. Due to Lazarus’s insistence on doing the debriefing early, it only made sense to enact the plan that early morning. While the plan seemed self explanatory, Jay couldn’t help but to have a bad feeling about it. Those feelings only worsened when Jeremiah started to discuss the disclaimers. 
For one, there was no backing out. It was either you’re in or not, and if anyone makes an attempt to leave, they would die. By Jeremiah’s hands or any other brave soul willing to do it. He also made clear that this plan was not flawless. There was a likelihood that any of them could die during the operation. Jay wasn’t surprised to see Lazarus agree to all of this so quickly. No hesitation as he nods and shakes Jeremiah’s hand. Jay admits that Lazarus was someone who would rather be dead than to be sent on another mission again. Jay couldn’t help but to agree, even if he was absolutely terrified of dying. Junior was on board with this whole plan as well. Of course, he probably ignored the warnings and just wanted to cause as much damage to Gameworks as possible. Jay heard Junior loudly tease Weasel Kid to “not fuck this up and kill everyone” as the two were leaving for the elevator. Jay was about to follow them and Lazarus out, but heard Jeremiah call out for him.
“Hang on. You, Jay, I need to discuss something with you.”
Lazarus glanced back at Jay who shrugged and motioned to go on without him.
Jay returned to the table, sitting across from Jeremiah who was staring at him intently. There was an awkward silence. 
“So, it’s been a while.” Jay broke the silence while wringing his hands together. Jeremiah took a deep breath, his age was becoming apparent as Jay saw how tired the man really looked.
“Yes. It has. What are you doing here?”
Jay shrugged and responded, “I was resigned to this game.” He paused for a second, realizing it wasn’t 100% true, so he rephased it. “Well, it was more of me wanting to be in it for the excitement.” Jay let out a bitter laugh.
Jeremiah looked surprised. “Out of all games, you chose this one? You’re a janitor, Jay. Not a soldier.”
“I’m beginning to realize that.”
There is another pause. Jay looked away from Jeremiah, content with staring at the ground. He didn’t want him to see how he was almost crying. 
“I thought you both died. I mourned for you two.”
“I’m sorry to hear that.”
“What happened to you and Reggie?”
Jeremiah started to tap his clawed finger on the table, a bit of a pained look on his face.
“I..I wish not to discuss it without Reginald’s consent.”
“I see. Well, it’s good to see you’re both alive and well. I should get going.”
As Jay was about to get up and leave this awkward situation, Jeremiah stopped him, this time grabbing his arm quickly.
“I did not say that this discussion was over, Jay.”
“What is it you want to discuss?”
“The plan. I want you to make sure you’re in.”
That made Jay look back at Jeremiah. He laughed awkwardly, becoming nervous under Jeremiah’s stern stare.
“I…I don’t think I should be a part of it. There’s no room for cowards and well, I haven’t changed in that regard.”
“Jay. You were never a coward.”
“I find that very hard to believe.” Jeremiah looked a bit frustrated. He climbed on top of the table to gently grab Jay’s shoulders.
“Listen to me. You are not a coward. In fact, we-...I need you for this plan. You’re the only other person with only knowledge of the base and its systems. I promise you will be safe so long as you follow everything to a tee, I’ll make sure of it.”
A sudden static noise from Jeremiah’s pocket interrupts the conversation. As he excuses himself and answers, Jay reflects on what Jeremiah told him. While it was nice to hear Jeremiah be so confident about him, his self doubt was already asking why that was. He was a coward, plenty of times he ran away from a fight when his comrades were doing all the fighting. Even back then, he was too afraid of rejection to even- 
No, Jay grimaced and shaked his head as he shook the thought out of his head. He stopped his thoughts from wandering any further when he saw Jeremiah put the device back in his pocket and looked at Jay.
“That was Reginald. He requests that you spend the night with us in the cabin.”
Jay furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. “Why?”
“It’s far too dangerous to fly in this weather. The others already have their rooms, but we have a miscalculation in how many people we would have to room. Besides, Reggie insists you come to the cabin. He would like to speak with you as well.” All of a sudden, Jeremiah grabbed his hand, which flustered Jay. His hand was freezing, it felt like he was holding a corpse’s hand more than a living person’s. “It’s nothing bad. It would be better than sleeping outside and it will be just us. Like old times.” Jeremiah said in a soft tone, softly smiling at Jay. Jay had seen Jerry smile genuinely before yet this one felt a bit forced. But Jay didn’t seem to care. In the moment, seeing Jeremiah’s smile only flustered him more as old feelings started to come back.
“...Alright.” Jay reluctantly said after glancing back and forth at the ground and Jeremiah’s face.
With that, Jeremiah leads him to the secret elevator and they head down to the lobby, which was completely empty. Jay noticed as they exited the inn that Jeremiah never let go of his hand, content with leading him to the cabin. The warm lights of its inside softly shining in the distance contrasted with the dread Jay felt in his stomach. 
...
When Jay entered the cabin, it looked pretty much the same as it used to. Although there were some little details that looked new to Jay, it all felt familiar to him which was comforting. Yet, the presence of Reggie staring at the blank computer screen made the atmosphere more ominous. When Jeremiah came in and shut the door behind them, he turned to look at the two, wheeling his chair around to face them fully. The squeaking of the wheels made Jay cringe. Reggie stared for a moment, specifically at Jay, before giving him a small smile.
“Well I’ll be. It really is you. How have you been?”
Reggie’s smile and tone just felt wrong to Jay. It just didn’t feel…genuine. That’s what Reggie always was: Genuine. “I’ve been worse…What about you? Have you been doing alright?”
“Not at all!” Reggie gave a sharp and bitter laugh. Jay frowned at his response, realizing with seeing him in the wheelchair how dumb the question really sounded. Reginald continued, “Oh, I haven’t been alright in a long, long time. Neither of us have been. Isn’t that right Jeremiah?”
Jay almost forgot Jeremiah was there for how silent he was. Jeremiah climbed onto the arm of the wheelchair and clung onto it like a hawk with a trainer. 
“Yes. It has been a difficult time for us.”
Jay looked at both of them with sympathy. There was an awkward silence between the three of them. 
“But enough of this pity talk. It’s far too depressing for this reunion. Afterall, it’s been so long since the three of us got to be together like this! Would you mind grabbing those drinks behind you for us? And pull up a chair! Relax for a while! It’ll be just like old times.” Reggie broke the silence with a cheery tone and grin, gesturing towards the lone chair and table with glasses filled behind Jay. Jay took the chair and placed it in front of Reggie and Jeremiah. When he did sit down in front of them, passing the drinks along and taking his own, there was still an uncomfortable tension between them all. This didn’t feel like “old times”. Old times would be them laughing at jokes they made and complaining about their jobs. The old times would have Jay listening to Reggie and Jeremiah talk to each other, engrossed in their own conversation. Jay never minded. He knew how dedicated the two were to each other. He always felt grateful that they chose him to be a witness to their closer and more intimate moments. But the attention was all on him now and he wasn’t sure what to do with it. Jay took small sips of his drink as he watched the other two across from him looked as uncomfortable as he was. 
“So… How come you’re in a wheelchair?” The moment Jay asked that question, Reggie frowned and he clenched the wheelchair’s arm.
“I’d rather not discuss it.” 
“Reggie. I know it sounds like a sensitive topic-”
“If you know, then why are we discussing it?” Reggie forced a smile when saying that. For some reason, that forced smile was Jay’s final straw. Jay huffed in frustration.
“Because I thought, for all these years, that you two died. The least you can do is tell me what happened.”
“Again, I’d rather not. I’m sorry that our disappearance concerned you so much, however-” Jay suddenly interrupted Reggie in a fit of anger, shouting at them.  
“Concerned?! I was more than concerned about you. I mourned for you. I cared so much about you two. Honestly, you two were the only friends I had. I just want to know what’s going on. This whole plan and…everything, it’s not like you two.”
Jay grabbed Reggie’s hand. Reggie flinched, which was concerning to Jay. But his attention was on him and not Jeremiah.
“No matter what you tell me, it will never leave this cabin. I promise you.” Jay grabs Jeremiah’s hand as well. Cold and small as it always was, yet his grip was tight. He can feel Jeremiah’s sharp nails dig into his skin. He ignored the pain and continued to push, “So can you two please tell me what happened to the old Reggie and Jeremiah? What changed?”
Reginald took a deep breath, glancing over to Jeremiah who was matching his tired expression. He stared into Jay’s concerned eyes, gripping his hand tightly.
“...Lionel did this to me.” Reggie confessed with a serious tone, not breaking eye contact with Jay. Jay couldn’t help but look confused. Lionel was a jerk, sure, but to this degree?
“Lionel? But-”
“He wanted this, Jay. He wanted me gone, but didn’t want any blood on his hands. So he sent Irving to do the dirty work of getting rid of me. I couldn’t believe it myself. Why would he want to get rid of me? He loved rootbeer and most importantly, he loved me. Or so I thought.” Jay noticed how Reginald was slightly shaking as he spoke. His hand was on his face, looking like he was desperately trying to keep composure. Jeremiah was already by his side, using his other arm to wrap around Reggie’s shoulders (or at least as far as his short arms can reach). Jay kept quiet, intently listening as he continued to hold their hands. Reggie continued,
“I refused to leave and well… I suppose Irving “respected” that decision.” He gestured towards his legs, letting out a bitter laugh. Jay’s eyes widen in horror as he puts the pieces together. It wasn’t out of character for Irving to be cruel, but this? This was on a whole other level. Reggie treated Irving with nothing but kindness and this is what he gets? It made Jay’s stomach turn. 
“Have you ever felt betrayal, Jay?” Reginald asked Jay who snapped out of his angered thoughts.
“I-I don’t think so.” 
“It’s the most painful feeling you will ever experience. Far worse than any physical torment, especially when your legs get broken into tiny bits of bones that stick out like knives. You lay on the floor, writhing in pain, thinking “Why would they do this to me? Was I not good enough? Was it my fault?”. And it is their fault, not mine! Never mine! I loved him! It’s all their fault. IT’S ALL HIS FAULT-” 
As Reggie begins to yell in anger, he stops when he feels Jeremiah squeeze his shoulder, looking upset. He takes a deep breath as Jeremiah continues for him. “Lionel wanted to look like a game dev prodigy in the eyes of the unsuspecting public. Super Weasel Kid being his first game looks better than Rootbeer Tender. Such mediocrity being praised, it sickens me. How can a game like that excuse the denial of our existence? For our suffering? Can you even fathom such a thing?” Jeremiah said all of that with such venom, Jay almost wondered why Weasel Kid was even allowed in the inn. He continued, “Irving. For what he did to Reginald, he must suffer.”
“Ah, Jeremiah,” Reginald interrupted gently, “We are getting a bit ahead of ourselves.” “Wh-What does that mean? Is that what this whole plan is about? To get revenge on Irving?” Jay asked, slowly putting together the pieces. Reginald only gave Jay a dry smile. 
“Ah. Well, you are about half right. I want Irving and Lionel dead.”
Jay let go of both of their hands, his face morphing into shock and horror. He stared at both of them in disbelief.
“Dead? You want them dead? That’s-” Jay laughs at how absurd it sounded. “Reggie, that’s nearly impossible. Lionel is on the other side of the screen! And Irving well-”
“Jay, I know this. That’s what this whole plan is for! Do you take me as a fool?” Reggie accused Jay with a bitter tone. Jay couldn’t help but to think if this really was Rootbeer Reggie and Jeremiah, his janitor. They certainly weren’t acting like them. The Jeremiah he knew was cold, but not malicious and hateful like the one in front of him. And the Reggie he knew was kind. Someone who would forgive too easily and always had a bright smile on his face. The man in front of him was not him, he was just someone with a similar face worn on like a distorted mask. His eyes filled with grief and darkness and the forced smiles he gave only made Jay more and more uncomfortable. 
“I-I don’t- of course not, Reggie, but, this- I mean-” Jay kept stuttering as he fell under the pressure of their intense stares. He was almost grateful that Reggie interrupted him.
“There will be a ritual performed using the Artifact. It will be performed once all the necessary participants have been retrieved.”
“Participants?”
“I have been collecting those who have been wronged by Lionel and Irving,” Jeremiah answered. “For the ritual to work, it requires six player characters, the blessing of a human player, and the Artifact.”
“The Hex…” Reggie said with a manic grin. “The Hex will allow us access to the real world. Once then, I will kill Lionel myself and this will all be over. I can finally be at peace.” 
“And…And what about Irving? How do you plan on going about that?”
Jeremiah, who was silent throughout Reggie’s explanation, spoke up, “The explosion from the bomb should be enough to kill him.” 
“And if it doesn’t?”
There was an awkward silence between them as Jeremiah and Reggie glanced at each other.
“We did not account for that.” Jeremiah awkwardly confessed, clearing his throat.
“But!” Reggie said loudly before Jay can panickally question how they could possibly miss accounting for a failed murder attempt on the guy who can order their deletion in seconds. “I’m sure that will not be an issue. The plan has made it this far, there is no way it will fail now. Things have fallen into place far too much for it to fail now.”
“Ah, but of course, there is just one thing that is a bit of a concern to this operation.”
“And what’s that?”
“You. It’s you.”
“How am I a concern? I promised I wouldn’t tell anyone about this. And Jeremiah must have told you that I want nothing to do with the breaking in.” Jeremiah and Reggie glanced at each other. It looked like they knew something that Jay didn’t, which made Jay squirm in his seat.
“Ah, well, that’s the issue. You’re the only person I trust with handling security.”
“Reggie, you can’t be serious. I can’t do it. I’m not going to do it. I’m sorry Reginald, and-and Jeremiah, but no! I’m too scared to do it.”
As Jay got up from his seat, Reggie grabbed his arm tightly, hurting Jay a little. 
“Jay. Please. I need you to do this. I…I know there’s a chance you won’t make it out alive, I won’t lie. But I swear to you, it’s a small chance. I wouldn’t be here begging you if I knew you wouldn’t survive.” 
Jay refused to look at them. Every instinct in Jay was telling him to run. They were going to send on a dangerous mission with a guarantee that he could very well die. Was it really worth it to escape Vicious Galaxy? Even more so, was it worth it for…them? 
...
Images of better days flashed in Jay’s head as did the old feelings he desperately avoided. As much as he didn’t want to die and would rather be a coward, he found that he just didn’t have it in him. He found himself glancing at the untouched drinks, still by their chairs. 
He remembered when Reginald told him that he didn’t even like drinking rootbeer. 
“Really?! You’re telling me that whole job, which is just making and serving rootbeer, the establishment you work at, hell! Even your name!! And you don’t even like to drink it?” The voice of a younger Jay played in his mind. He heard Reginald laugh as did Jeremiah’s soft chuckle.
“Nope!” The younger and cheerier voice of Reginald admitted. “I was never a fan of anything sweet. That’s Jeremiah. I have more of a sour tooth. In fact, I can eat a whole lemon and not pucker once.”
“You’re just screwing with me, Reggie.”
“I swear, I’m not! Give me a lemon, I’ll prove it right now.”
Jay chuckled at the serious tone Reggie had.
“But seriously, I have to ask: If you don’t like drinking it, why do you make it? Is it because you’re forced to?”
“Forced? Oh, I’m not forced to do it.” He remembered how Reggie paused for a second. “Well, maybe a little,” He said with a light laugh. “But I don’t mind. You know why, Jay? Because it makes Lionel happy. It makes my patrons happy. And it makes you happy. That’s all that matters to me.”
...
Before Jay can even process it, his mind shifted to another scene. It was a small moment with just him and Jeremiah. Reginald wasn’t there when Jay arrived late that night, apparently having gone through a busy day and retiring for the night. Jeremiah stayed behind, having cleaned everything and was patiently waiting for Jay’s arrival. In retrospect, Jay always appreciated the moments when it was just them alone. Jay always felt like he never knew Jeremiah as well as he did with Reginald. The little guy was just someone who didn’t share much about himself and always seemed cold and distant. So as the two had some rootbeer Reggie left behind for them to share, they talked quietly amongst themselves. But this stood out to Jay because of one simple question:
“Why do you listen to Reginald?”
Jeremiah looked at Jay oddly.
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“I mean, and I’m not saying he’s like Irving or a bad boss, but…Jeremiah, if Reginald told you to jump off a bridge, would you?”
“Of course.” Jeremiah answered with no hesitation. 
“See! Exactly what I mean! You take every word that man says like it’s a commandment. Why?” 
“I love him.”
There was an awkward silence between them. Jay remembered how a bit crushed he was hearing that. He was just gaining some attraction towards them and hearing that just felt like any chance he had was thrown out the window. It never made him want to leave, strangely enough, but only increased his want of becoming closer. He heard Jeremiah continue, “Your example of the bridge was misleading. Reginald would never ask that of me. He would never make me do anything that would lead me to unavoidable pain or death. I would volunteer that on my own volition if it is needed. Wouldn’t you do the same for someone you care about?”
...
The two memories lingered as he snapped back into the present. Reggie’s hand was still gripping his arm and he could hear Jeremiah talking in the background. Jay shakily sighs, finally making up his mind and already regretting it. However, he wasn’t doing it for him. 
It was for them.
“...I’ll do it.” Jay felt his voice quiver as Reggie’s tight grip disappeared and he sat back down on the chair. He looked at Reggie and Jeremiah, both of which looked a bit surprised.
“You have no idea how much this means to me. Thank you.” Reggie’s gentle tone and soft voice made Jay’s heart skip a beat. It didn’t help that Jeremiah had reached out to hold his hand tenderly. Jay knew for a fact going on this mission would be one of his biggest regrets, he might not even make it out alive for mir’s sake. Still, he justified his decision by the relief and joy it brought to the two people he loved.
Reginald reached down for his neglected drink as did Jeremiah, both of them raising the drinks for a toast. Jay quickly grabbed his, realizing what was going on. Reggie cleared his throat, “A toast for us and for the plan. My revenge will finally be brought to fruition. And it’s thanks to you two.” Jay clinked his glass with them and took a drink. It was as sweet as he remembered. He almost laughed at seeing Reggie trying to hide his disgust at the sweet taste, only taking a small drink. It seemed time had flown by so quickly as the three were talking and laughing like they used to. Jay had even challenged Reggie to an arm wrestle, bragging a bit about how he certainly got stronger from being in Vicious Galaxy. Even though Jay lost, to see the two look happy and chatting amongst themselves like old times made it all worth it. But the panic soon kicked in as he recalled that he would be leaving in the morning. Most likely not returning at all. Reggie and Jeremiah sensed Jay’s dread radiating off of him, stopping their conversation to look concerned at him. 
“Jay? Are you alright?” Reggie asked with a worried tone. Jay looked at them frightfully, his mind becoming frenzied. Yet, there was one thing he knew he had to do.
“I-Look. I know you keep telling me that it’s going to go fine tomorrow and I’ll come back safe, but I just can’t believe that. And so if this is my last night alive, then I can’t take this to my grave.”
“What are you talking about, Jay?” Jeremiah asked in a cautious tone, becoming a bit apprehensive at Jay’s panicked state. Jay took a shaky breath, kneeling in front of the wheelchair on the floor. He barely made eye contact with either of them. He put his hand on Reggie’s knee.
“I love you. Oh ‘Mir, I love you both so much.” Jay felt wetness on his cheeks and his throat tightening but he kept going. “I have for years. If I only knew how little time we had together, I would have gotten over this sooner. I’m such a coward.
And if you don’t love me back, if either of you don’t, that’s fine. I can accept that. Hate me if you want even. I only wish for this to not be my last regret. And-..Also-, I mean-”
“Jay.” Reggie’s voice suddenly interrupts Jay's confession. He hesitantly looks up at them, expecting rejection from both. What Jay did not expect was to feel the gentle touch of two very different hands on both of his cheeks. A gloved one that was warm and a small cold one with his nails slightly poking him. Both staring at him lovingly. Jay’s face turned as red as his nose. 
“We would never hate you. In fact, I speak for Jeremiah and myself that we felt the same way towards for as long as you have.” Reginald whispered while caressing his face. As much as Jay felt his heart soar and he wanted so badly to burst in joy, Jay couldn’t help but to question that last part.
“I..Wait. Did-Did you two know? This whole time?!”
“Weeellll…” Reginald laughed awkwardly while Jeremiah looked away, clearly a bit embarrassed. “Jeremiah suspected. He did mention it to me a couple times but I wasn’t sure if it was the right call to bring it up. You can be, uh, a little skittish, like a cat.”
“So. You’re calling me a “skittish cat”?” Jay asked.
“Don’t be embarrassed, we’re not taunting you, just stating the truth. You’re our skittish cat, afterall.” Jeremiah teased with a grin, lightly pinching Jay’s cheek. Jay, on the other hand, looked unimpressed and sighed loudly as the other two chuckled.
“Ha. Ha. Very funny.” Jay looked annoyed as the other two calmed their laughter down.
Reginald glanced at the clock hanging by his bed. “Well, I see that it’s rather late. You both have to leave very early so I suggest we start heading to bed.” Reginald paused, glancing at Jeremiah who nodded. “Unless, you have other ideas?” 
Jay looked at him, a bit puzzled on what he meant. “Um, excuse me?”
“Oh you know.”
“I…I don’t know. What other ideas?”
Jeremiah sighs loudly, looking impatient as Reginald couldn’t help but to snicker a little.
“Intercourse, Jay. We are subtly asking if you would like to have sexual intercourse with us.”
“Oh..OH!” Jay’s face became hot and red as a tomato and he looked down, refusing to make eye contact. “I-I-I don’t- Are you sure? It just feels so sudden, not to say I don’t want to! I do, but-”
“Jay, Jay! We wouldn’t have asked if we weren’t sure. As much as I don’t want to say it or entertain the idea,” Reggie sighed. “If this is truly your last night alive, wouldn’t you want to make the most of it?” 
“I agree with Reginald.” Jeremiah piped in. “We want you. I want you.” 
Jay mulled over this for a moment. And perhaps it was some of the rootbeer in his system or the acceptance that death was already waiting on his doorstep, but for once in his entire existence, he ignored his inner voice telling him to run. Oh no, he was not running from this.
He instead picked up Reginald and Jeremiah, holding them in his arms. He may have lost an arm wrestling match, he most certainly was much stronger than he was in the past. But as soon as he did that, his adrenaline wore off for a second as he realized what he was doing.
“Oh, uh, sorry. I should have-”
“No, no, no! You’re fine.” Reginald said, looking flustered for once. Jeremiah was silent, but moved so suddenly to grab Jay’s face and kiss him passionately. He winced a sharp tooth and managed to knick his lip but as Jeremiah pulled away, Reginald immediately pulled Jay in to kiss him, leaving him breathless. His helmet clattered to the floor as he started to walk towards the bed, his two lovers never letting up on their constant affection towards him. 
...
It was the only good memory that flashed to his head as the world slowed around him. He had his back turned from his comrades. He couldn’t bear to see Lazarus’s or Jeremiah’s face as he heard Junior pump his shotgun. He wasn’t mad at Junior, far from it. Jay knew the kid was only doing what they agreed to. It was Jay who let his cowardice control him, putting Lazarus’s life at risk while he did the easy work of just sitting and waiting. Why did he even agree to this? For love? What kind of love was this? Was he really risking everything for the vengeance of the shadow of a man he once knew? Why didn’t Jeremiah stop this?
. . .
Why didn’t he stop this? He knew it was part of the agreement, but surely Jeremiah could have prevented it? Bended the rules a little? Jay didn’t want his final thoughts to be this, to be blaming his now lovers for his mistakes. Yet, it felt right doing so. If he had just said no and backed out, he would have been fine. Maybe stuck in Vicious Galaxy or even died at another person’s hands, but oh mir’, anything was better than dying from cowardice, by your own teammate’s hands. Jay shut his eyes. 
“Oh ‘Mir… I should have stayed as a janitor.” He could feel his voice tremble as he spoke his final words. “It was safe. It was-”
The last thing Jay heard was a loud bang and everything went to black.
...
The remaining three watched as Jay’s body hit the ground facedown with a thud. A small puddle of blood forming underneath. Jeremiah was at least thankful he didn’t have to see his face. Junior reloaded his gun, seemingly not that phased on the murder he just committed.
“No time for cowards, right boss?” He asked Jeremiah, who had snapped out of staring at the body to look at Junior. He cleared his throat,
“Unfortunately,” He made the mistake of glancing back at Jay’s corpse, grimacing a bit. “It had to be done.” 
Jeremiah turned his attention towards Lazarus who was looking at him with utter grief in his face. He heard about how Jay and him got along. Jeremiah couldn’t help but sympathize with the poor man, who he heard quietly whisper to Jay.
“Goodbye, Jay…”
As much as Jeremiah would like to stay a little longer, to at least say his own goodbye or bury a grave, they had no time to waste. They already wasted enough.
“The Artifact awaits. Let’s go.” Jeremiah pressed on, already walking in the base with Junior following right behind him. He didn’t turn back. Grief was merely a setback. Reginald would get his revenge, Jeremiah would make sure of it.
...
Reginald woke up to the sound of floorboards breaking, panicked shouts from his patrons, and a loud bang from the basement. He sighed tiredly, a little upset he had been rudely awakened from his impromptu nap. He didn’t sleep last night, how could he? Well, not only because of…what they did last night (he still felt a bit sore) but also from a persistent feeling he hadn’t felt in a long time.
Regret.
He stared at Jay’s sleeping face for the entire night. When morning came, Reggie pretended to be asleep, not wanting to say goodbye for what could be the very last time he sees him. He heard his wheelchair being pushed to his bedside. He felt a cold chill on head, as he usually did in the mornings. Then, he felt warm lips gently kiss the same spot, feeling the hot air from his mouth linger only for a little bit and disappearing. He didn’t get up until an hour later, when the sun was about to rise and he could smell the pancakes Bryce was making from the inn. 
He shook off the memory, rubbing his eyes out of tiredness. What was he doing?
Ah, yes, he was making sure the props were set and ready. He was just about to start putting the photos into their frames for Jeremiah to hang up. 
Speaking of Jeremiah, he heard the door unlock from inside the secret room. He paused when he saw Reggie.
“...You look exhausted.”
“Hm, yes, I didn’t get much sleep last night. Did everything go as planned?” Reggie asked while sorting through the photos.
“Yes…” Jeremiah paused. He sighed tiredly as he explained. “Mostly. Irving did not die in the explosion. But everything else went exactly as planned. We even freed her. She’s waiting in the basement.”
“Irving won’t be a problem. I already have an idea of how we can get rid of him. Did Lazarus and Weasel make it out?”
Jeremiah nods, taking off his armor. “Yep. They made it out fine. Lazarus and Weasel Kid are already en route with the Artifact as we speak.”
Reggie couldn’t help but to grin excitedly. “Excellent. All we need is one more player character and the finishing touches to our game, and it will all come together.” He turned to look at Jeremiah with a smile. “I couldn’t have done this without you.”
Jeremiah walked over to Reggie. He simply grabbed his arm and kissed his hand, slowly intertwining his own with Reggie’s.
“Anything for you. I want to see them both suffer.”
Reggie smiled softly, patting Jeremiah’s head. His smile faded as he remembered about them.
“...And the other two. What happened to them?”
Jeremiah stopped and Reggie could see the remorse in his eyes as he gripped onto his hand.
“Junior died in the explosion, crushed by the debris. Poor child was simply unlucky.”
“And Jay?”
“...” Jeremiah went silent. Reggie’s mood and tone darkened. “Jeremiah. What happened to Jay?”
Jeremiah shakily sighed. Reggie was almost surprised at how sorrowful Jeremiah looked.
“Jay…He did his part well. But apparently, Lazarus did all the killing for him. He only managed to get the security down. By the time we were at the main gate, he got cold feet. He knew what we had agreed to. He died by Junior’s hands. One shotgun blast was all it took.”
Silence. Reginald’s face became unreadable as he processed the news. Jeremiah only held on tighter, leaning against his arm.
“I…I can’t say I did not expect it to happen. We both knew neither one was gonna make it, but I did expect a bit of a more…grander death.” 
“Reggie, I mean no offense or disrespect, but that would be asking too much of him. But he admitted to being…”a coward”. That’s brave enough for him.”
“Hm, I suppose.” Reggie looked back down at the photos and frames blankly. He pulled the photo of Jay and put it in the frame. He handed it and the rest of the photos and frames to Jeremiah.
“If you wouldn’t mind, I need these in frames and hanged. I would like you to put Jay’s by the kitchen door instead of our original spot.”
Jeremiah nodded, taking what Reggie had given him. “Of course. Anything else?”
“No, no. I would like to just be alone for a moment.”
“Very well, then.” 
Before Jeremiah could walk out the door, Reggie stopped him.
“Oh, and one more thing: I urge you to take some time for yourself when you’re done. Please. You look like you need it.”
Jeremiah was silent as he listened. He didn’t even respond, just left the room after Reggie was done talking. 
Reginald sat back in his wheelchair, staring at one of the static screens of the monitors. He felt tears come to his eyes as he let them fall, scowling at the reflection of himself. This was not his fault. Jay’s death was not his fault. He kept telling himself that as more tears came down. This was the fault of Irving and Lionel. They started this, they did this to them, and they were going to pay. Lionel wanted this, Irving’s words taunted in his head, fueling his anger and hatred further. Lionel wants this. Lionel-
“...Jay?”
He suddenly was snapped out of his thoughts by Lazarus’s voice crackling through the speakers. He looked at the lobby’s monitor, seeing Lazarus stare at the recently hanged portrait of Jay. His shocked face shifted into one of mourning.
“He was a good man…” He whispered to himself, believing no one else was listening. “Maybe even the best of us.” 
Reggie watched as he went to his usual spot with Rust, talking to him like nothing happened. Reginald wiped his eyes, letting a quiet laugh to himself. While Jay did die like a coward as he always was, at the very least he was liked…even loved. As Reggie left the room and went out the kitchen, wheeling himself behind the bar, he couldn’t help but to glance at the portrait, staring at it for a few moments.
Lazarus was right. He was the best among them all. As much as a scaredy cat he could be, panicking over the littlest of things and straying away from fights or confrontations, he had a good heart. More heart than Reginald or Jeremiah could ever have. Maybe that’s why letting him go, while feeling awful, wasn’t so hard to do.
Jay had hope. Far too much in Reggie’s eyes. It reminded him of his younger self, so desperate to believe that there was good in people. So easy to control and break.
It had killed them both.  
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jeongjinman · 3 months
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elegyofthemoon · 4 months
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6, 22, 26
hi staaaaaan
6:Age you get mistaken for
tbh most people get my age correctly and if not then just a few years younger. im 25 so most folks think im either 21-23 ish
22:What I want to be when I get older
h. dude idek at this point. this dream keeps beating the heck out of me that i wonder should i keep going on this path or is it time i call it quits before i burn myself out.
the idea used to be clearer and theres a blurry idea of what id like to be but i guess in the end the core of what i want to be is 'i want to help'.
26:My biggest pet peeves
I feel like this is bigger than a pet peeve but I get annoyed with arrogant people lmao people who are so full of themselves and try to make themselves all pretty while also shitting on others or putting others down. the worst kind of people.
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dandyshucks · 4 months
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if I try to mess with the eyes on the first one anymore I'm going to lose my mind DBDNDML so here have some self insert art,,,, also the houndoom was largely copied from someone else's art (dvixie/SkyVixie on deviantart, the art seems to have been taken down from their gallery though, I just found the art on pinterest and then had to track down the artist fjfkdl idk why ppl repost art with no credit 😭), I was trying to just get a feel for drawing them so I figured (HEAVILY) referencing someone else's piece would be alright for this sort of personal art thing!!
#aaaand I'll turn off rbs too djdksl i dont want to take any credit for that houndoom#i changed a couple minor things but dbfkdl it rly is just me looking at that other person's art and trying to draw it myself#it was good for getting a feel for how to draw them though!!! this was before the other art featuring houndoom i did a while ago#so i think it helped a lot to be able to draw houndoom again on my own this time fjfkdjdl#gave me a feel for placement and anatomy and whatnot#i know copying is largely considered to be Bad in the art community but if u do it the right way i think it can be beneficial to ur art#u just have to be careful and not claim credit for it fjdkl like... idk be smart and respectful#i think this is the first time I've ever done smth like this actually SNDKSL#the closest i get to copying is using free-to-use pose bases occasionally and even then i sometimes clarify in the tags that im using one#every day i fear someone will walk up and show all the drawings I've used free-to-use pose bases for#and be like AHA. I'VE FOUND YOU OUT. YOU'RE A FAKE ARTIST!!!!#and its like... no... i just like using free-to-use pose bases sometimes DBDJDKL#takes out the work of figuring out posing sometimes when im tired of coming up w my own fjfkdl#ANYWAYS. RAMBLE OVER SORRY SNDJFKDL#moral of the story: if u copy art just do it in a respectful and clear way and don't take credit for it when its not yours sbdjdksl#okay im going to skedaddle off this post before i stick my foot in my mouth if i havent already djdkdls WAUGH i am afraid of posting this#but i want to share self insert stuff somewhere sjfjdkl and i like the human posing i did on the second one so... SIGH.#dandy.cmd#doodlebug.png#junebug 🪲
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Absolutely fascinating to be in the middle intersection of knowing that Thing is really popular, and that because Thing is popular there's a fair bit of vocal backlash to thing (because people are very mad Thing is popular when they don't like it) and you find yourself running through the unpleasant takes (not bad, just not what you're here for) from people who don't like Thing like snow white running through the scary fucked up forest until you finally find the fucking cottage where people who like Thing talk about Thing. Then you pass out in the cottage and when you wake up a bunch of small and opinionated creatures still carrying their burdens from the content mine arguing about Thing and also now your presence in relation to Thing bc you were clearly fleeing from the bad takes forest. This metaphor isn't what I wanted it to be but you get the idea
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ficsilike-reblogged · 9 months
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Invisible Smoke - Three
Summary: There is something going on with Jake’s favorite mechanic. And he finally gets some answers.
Pairing: Jake “Hangman” Seresin/F!Reader Word Count: 9k ABSOLUTELY NO MINORS ALLOWED
A/N: I apologize for the delay and thank you all so much for the love on the last chapter. Life has been a little overwhelming lately. Work has been hectic and I had a close family member pass away. I am hoping to come up for air soon. Thank you for your patience. And I do feel the need to reiterate that I DO NOT keep a tag list. Sorry!
Warnings: Naval inaccuracies, themes of stalking, cursing, mentions of bodily harm/injury, domestic abuse, and unhealthy coping mechanisms.
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What could you possibly say? The truth was out of the question, at least the entirety of it was. You couldn't and wouldn’t drag him into this more than he already was. Jake deserved better than being wrapped up in your mess. “I got caught up in something above my paygrade a few years ago. Thought I had left it in the past. I’ll take care of it.” You took the Polaroid from his hand and threw it into the footwell in front of you before making sure to press your shoe over it.
Jake was quiet as he started your car and pulled out of the lot, turning toward the direction of your little bungalow. Maybe you should have been surprised he knew the way—he’d only come over with the rest of the Daggers twice and Bradley had been driving—but for some reason it just made sense. Of course Jake would know. His jaw was shut tight, you could see the tendons working as his teeth ground together. But just as quickly as you noticed it, he relaxed. But he didn’t move to turn the radio to a different station or raise the volume. He just kept driving.
The rollercoaster of emotions you’d just endured had you sagging in your seat. While your tears had slowed to a leaky trickle, they didn’t stop. And you wanted to scream, to rage at the cruelty of it all, but mostly what you wanted to do was crawl into bed after making sure your door and windows were locked.
He’d ruined your night. He had somehow found out you were going to the Hard Deck and had purposefully planted that picture. You were almost surprised that he hadn’t slashed your tires when he had the chance, too.
But it mattered little when Jake pulled into your driveway and handed you your keys after shutting off your car. He followed you up to the small, stone stoop and waited until you waved him in to step inside. You felt his eyes on you as you turned the locks on your door and then double-checked the one on the handle before you wiped at your face. Mascara and foundation smeared against your hand and you grimaced as you noticed it. Fantastic.
“Do you want a drink or something? I’m going to call you an Uber but before then? I have tea, water, and soda I know you won’t drink. I don’t keep alcohol in the house, sorry.” You were rambling, you knew that. But did you stop? No. “I can also order something for delivery, if you want.” You sniffled and tried to resist the urge to wipe at your face again.
Jake’s shoulders rolled as if he were trying to shake off a bug before he shook his head. “Why don’t you go get ready for bed, Punch? I’ll wait out here.”
That sounded like he was staying. And, really, you knew you should be shoving him out the door and into an Uber you knew would take him back to his car and far away from you and the disaster that was your life. But you still nodded, trying to ignore how you liked knowing he’d just be in the living room, waiting. “Feel free to snoop,” you said, retreating down the hall.
“I’m not going to snoop!”
“Yes, you are.”
**
And then, as soon as Jake heard your bedroom door close, he started to snoop. He did have your permission anyway and that half-assed answer you gave him wasn’t sitting right in his gut. Your little house was neat, if not in need of a bit of dusting. Art prints in soft greens and light yellows were hung in straight lines with personal photographs, in smaller silver frames, dotted between. A bookshelf took up an entire wall and was organized by last name…except for the bottom shelf that was mostly empty with just a small stack of lilac spines and silver lettering. Jake bent to get a better look but paused, spotting two large but thin frames tucked behind the bookcase. He tugged one out and saw that it was your undergraduate degree from some university up the coast. The next frame held your Masters Degree. Both were covered in dust and forgotten about. Almost like you had purposefully shoved them away. Carefully, Jake put them back and tried not to think about why you wouldn’t want them displayed, and instead grabbed one of the lilac books. It didn’t have a traditional cover, just the title: Sunlight Filtered Through Champagne. Below it was a small sticker with “ARC” typed out in bold white letters. Turning the book to look at its spine, the author’s name now accompanied the title: Georgia Torrance. There was a small note sticking out of the top and Jake slowly pulled it out to look at. Thought you may want it in your hands! Can’t wait to see what you come up with next! What did that mean?
When he heard your door open again, he was quick to put the note and book back and stand straight, trying to make it look like he was just looking at the thriller paperbacks on the shelf at his eyeline. It looked like you had a grading system on the shelf, too, scribbled on a small post-it note, denoting happy endings and not-so-happy endings. There was also a note to donate all of the not-so-happy ending books.
It was like you needed hope that a bad situation could end on a good note. And then there were all the locks on your door. The handle of a baseball bat was sticking out from under your little couch. Your curtains were not open when you arrived. You couldn’t read thrillers that ended badly because you were living in a fucked up one yourself, weren’t you?
“I got caught up in something above my paygrade.”
The words didn’t sit right with him. This wasn’t some sort of government cover up. This wasn’t a case of you seeing something you shouldn’t have. The note had been too familiar and the photo had been too intimate.
“You look like you’re trying to think,” you said.
Jake turned and almost swallowed his tongue as he looked at you. You’d switched out your sundress for tiny shorts and socks that went up to your thighs. A baggy Navy t-shirt nearly covered your shorts. You looked so soft, so comfortable even with your eyes still a little swollen from your earlier tears. And it twisted at something warm behind his ribs.
“Careful, you might pull something if you try too hard.” The insult was lacking its usual heat but Jake hardly noticed. Something else had gained his attention. A large gnarled scar was peeking out from under your shorts on your left leg. It reached halfway down your thigh and Jake couldn’t see how high up it went. Whatever had happened, it looked like it had hurt immensely. Then he remembered how the slits in your dresses were always on your right side. Your shorts, while tight, always reached your knees. You had been hiding it.
Who had hurt you?
He must have been staring too long because you angled your body away from him and cleared your throat. “I’m gonna call you an Uber. Sorry for my freak out earlier. You coulda been home and asleep by now. Or picking up someone at the Hard Deck. God, I really fucked up your night.”
You were rambling again. And maybe Jake would have found it endearing in any other circumstance but not when you were twisting your hands into the excess fabric of your shirt and shuffling away from him to grab your phone.
Slowly, as to not startle you, Jake reached out and gently took the phone from your hands and set it on the couch cushion. Your face scrunched with your confusion and the divot between your eyebrows only deepened when Jake set his hands on your shoulders. “You gonna tell me what actually happened?”
Your features shifted and shuttered, falling into the casual annoyance you usually wore around him. “I told you-”
“Yeah, you told me something. Now tell me the truth. I was in that car with you tonight, Punch. I saw how scared you were. A picture had you just as scared as nearly getting run off the highway. Tell me what is going on, please.”
Your jaw clenched and you wiggled out from under Jake’s grip. “So you’re calling me a liar now?”
“No! I just-”
“I’m sorry you got pulled into this, okay? I am. I never should have brought you to the party. You never should’ve been in the car.”
You weren’t getting it. He needed you to understand. “I’m glad I was with you! I’m glad you had me with you—but you can’t just tell me that you have it handled or brush it off because-”
“I’m not brushing anything off!” You snarled. “Stop trying to play hero!”
It may have been easier if you had just slapped him. Was that how you saw him? “I’m not playing at anything. But I can’t help you if you won’t let me try.”
The glint in your eyes was near murderous. Jake had only ever seen you look like this once before and it had been when some asshole had yanked on Penny’s arm at the Hard Deck. “Just stop! I-”
“I know something is going on. You can’t convince me otherwise, all right? My mama always said that if you smell smoke, it’s ‘cause there’s a fire.”
You wiped a hand over your eyes and Jake hated how he noticed your chin wobbling. “Your stupid southern colloquialisms do not apply to this situation. There is no smoke!”
Jake stepped forward again and peeled your hand away from your face, sighing as he saw fresh tears lining your lashes. He never wanted to make you cry. Not ever. “There is smoke. And I want to help you. Let me help you.”
You sniffled and looked away from him again but didn’t pull your hands out of his grip. “I don’t fucking understand this metaphor. A-and I don’t want to tell you.”
The words cracked in your throat and Jake only squeezed at your hands. He was here for you. Couldn’t you see that?
“Invisible smoke or not, I’m not going to tell you. I’m not.” You shook your head and finally pulled your hands from his and Jake was prepared for you to step back and tell him to leave, to tell him, again, that you had this handled. Instead, your warm palms pressed against his chest and your tear filled gaze locked on his face. His next breath stalled. God, you were beautiful. “I don’t want to be the one to make you look at me differently. Just…just let me have the rest of this night, okay? I’ll text Bradley and tell him that he can tell you. But just let me have this last night where I’m not some stupid, broken girl in your eyes.”
Jake reached up and settled his hands over yours, noticing how goosebumps raced up your arms when his thumbs brushed against your knuckles. “You could never be. You’ll always be Punch.”
You sighed and almost smiled at him before shaking your head, pulling your hands out from under his. “No, I won’t.”
**
You weren’t entirely sure how you managed to convince Jake to watch a movie with you instead of talking or prying more, but you had a bowl of half eaten microwave popcorn between you on the cushions and The Mummy playing on your television.
This wasn’t how you saw this night playing out. Of course, a person could never really fit a car chase and a quick emotional breakdown into their schedule so, perhaps this was the best possible outcome. As Brendan Fraser’s Rick O’Connell gave Evy a pilfered toolkit in the most adorably awkward manner, your gaze drifted over to Jake.
And he was looking right at you.
Shit. Embarrassed heat washed over you and you quickly looked back at the television.
“C’mere.”
“What?” It was barely more than a squeak and you stubbornly refused to move your gaze away from the television again.
“I know you heard me,” Jake repeated, a bit of a laugh cracking his words. “Come here.”
“I’m not a dog, you know,” you bit back before you could think of being polite. Old habits do die hard.
But it seemed like Jake didn’t particularly care, because he moved the popcorn bowl onto your coffee table and then grabbed at your legs, dragging you over to him with a simple tug. The noise that escaped you was a mortifying mix of a squeak and a yelp and you fell forward with the force of it, hands falling against his arm and shoulder awkwardly. His warm, work-rough hands slid up your thighs, skirting over the scar that still left you grimacing even if the pain had faded years ago, and settled on the curve of your waist. Then, with another simple movement, your thighs were bracketing his and he was looking up at you with the stupid, beautiful sea glass eyes. There was something in his gaze you didn’t recognize.
Or maybe you did and you couldn’t voice it.
“What’re you-”
“You look like you needed a hug.”
You arched a brow and ignored the thundering of your heart. How many times had you thought about something like this only to curse your wandering thoughts? “Oh?”
“Yeah. And I’ve been told I give the best hugs.”
Your mouth twisted to the side—you weren’t sure if you were fighting a smile or a snarl. “Who told you that? Which one of your bed warmers-”
The words stalled behind your teeth when Jake leaned up just enough to wrap his arms around you, warm and solid. And you hated that it immediately brought tears to your eyes. God, how long had it been since someone had hugged you like this? Held you like this? You melted into his grasp like butter on hot toast, going slack against him until your forehead rested on the broad expanse of his shoulder. Jake’s movements halted for a moment. And, if you had been anyone else, you might have said you felt his breath catch. But you knew better.
“This means nothing, you know,” you said, one last ditch effort to not let him know how pathetically easy you were enraptured with his easy touch. “I’m withholding my judgment on if you give good hugs or not.”
You heard him smile before his hands continued their smoothing motions up and down your spine. “Okay, Punch.”
You could have argued a little more. Maybe mentioned how he probably needed a hug more than you or how you wouldn’t feel bad when his legs fell asleep under your weight. But you didn’t. You didn’t because you were so comfortable and your favorite movie was playing in the background and Jake’s cologne smelt so good…who could blame you for falling asleep?
**
You snored. Just a little. It honestly reminded him of like…a baby bear for some reason. But maybe you were just extra tired. Jake wouldn’t be surprised if you hadn’t been sleeping well. Either way, Jake slowly slid one arm beneath your butt and kept the other a little higher on your back and gently lifted you up from the couch; your head lolled to the side and fell against his chest as you let out a heavy breath. Jake pretended not to feel how you rubbed your cheek against him and let out a soft hum. Or maybe he filed that little sound away to think about later. Either way, Jake made his way down the short hallway and pushed open your door with his foot, wincing as its hinges whined.
Your eyes opened the slightest bit as soon as your head hit the pillow and Jake was sure he would never forget the smile you shot at him.
Then he was thinking about waking up every morning to your sleepy, happy smile. He was thinking about carrying you to bed after a long night at the Hard Deck. He was thinking of you. He had always tried to shove those thoughts down. He had tried to ignore them because he knew—he knew—that nothing could come of it. But now he couldn’t. He knew what it was like to hold you in his arms. He could deal with the paperwork, admirals, and ribbing from the Daggers…if it meant he could…well, he’d finish that thought when he knew you were thinking the same thing.
After shutting your door, and making a mental note to pick up some WD-40 for those squeaky hinges, he made his way back to your living room. He picked up the popcorn bowl and washed it out and then straightened the cushions, just like his mama taught him to do. The movie finished as Jake sat on your couch and dug his phone out of his pocket. It was well past one in the morning but he still pulled up Bradshaw’s contact and typed out a message. We need to talk.
He’d probably hear from him in the mor-
His phone beeped with a new message and he was quick to click on the thread. I’m on my way.
Wasn’t he supposed to be out in the desert with Maverick? What did he mean he was on his way?
Apparently Rooster was also psychic because another message came through. Cut trip short. Will be at her house in an hour.
So, Jake waited. He played a stupid game on his phone to pass the time and made sure it was muted so it wouldn’t wake you up. Every time he heard a car pass by, he checked the window. He needed to make sure it wasn’t the charger again and he wanted to meet Bradley at the door so you wouldn’t wake up when he knocked. Five more rounds of the mindless game on his phone and then he was standing up again, and watching a familiar Bronco pull onto your driveway behind your car. He was surprised to see Maverick exit the passenger side but waved them both in when they approached the door.
“Where is she?” Bradshaw asked instead of a greeting.
“She’s asleep,” Jake hissed. “Keep your voice down.”
“Have you checked all the windows?” Maverick asked, voice thankfully at the correct decibel.
“A couple times,” Jake said. Maverick knew too? Was he the only one that didn’t know what you were hiding? “Are either of you going to tell me what’s going on?”
Maverick looked at Rooster but Rooster was looking right at Jake, mouth set in a firm line beneath his ridiculous mustache. “I gotta see her first. All right? We’ll stay with her for the rest of the night.”
That just about crawled all over Jake. He was just going to shove him out? After everything that’s happened tonight? “No. No, this is fucking ridiculous. Tell me-”
“Seresin,” Maverick cut in. “You’ve had a long night. Why don’t you head back to base and get some sleep?”
“I-”
“That’s an order, Lieutenant Commander.”
That simple phrase repeated in his head as he sat in the back of the Uber headed toward the Hard Deck, and when he drove himself home, and as he stared at the ceiling of his bedroom. That’s an order, Lieutenant Commander. What it actually was, was insulting. But he did as he was ordered, knowing that Mav and Rooster were trying to take care of you (and Maverick did have the authority to have him brought up in front of the brass)…but why didn’t they see that Jake was trying to help, too? As he stewed, his phone chirped with a notification from his sister, Mia. It was a picture of her sitting out on a familiar porch swing, the Texas night sky on display over her head as she smiled at the camera. She was holding up a cup—Jake knew it was probably filled with her favorite chamomile blend from a shop a few towns over from the family ranch. Hope you’re getting more sleep than me!
Jake sighed for the umpteenth time. Mia’s ex-husband, a man named Ryan who Jake had never liked, had up and left her for a coworker. She was understandably heartbroken and then when she discovered that Ryan had a child on the way with his mistress while Mia had been struggling to have a baby, she had been near inconsolable. It had taken her nearly a week for Jake and his sisters and mom to get Mia out of bed. It had been slow going to help her get back on her feet, even after the lawyer his mom hired managed to get Mia all of the marital assets and half of Ryan’s monetary savings alongside a hefty alimony. Mia had always been the strongest of his sisters, an older sister to the core, who had truly stepped up when their father had stepped out on their mother. It had been a cruel twist of fate that Mia’s marriage had turned out to mirror their mother’s so closely. Jake spoke with each of his sisters at least once a week, mostly just making sure they were doing okay and to lessen the bit of guilt he had for leaving Texas and them in the rear view when he joined the Navy. After tonight, he could use a little talk with his sister.
Jake hit the small phone icon beneath her name and it rang twice before she picked up. “Please tell me I didn’t wake you up with my text.”
“I was awake.”
“What’re you doing up right now?” She grumbled.
“Had a long night.” That was putting it lightly.
“I thought you were going out with that girl, Punch? Not the girl of your dreams anymore?”
Jake bit back the groan he felt rising in his throat. “I never said that.”
“You didn’t need to. You’re my baby brother and I know you. She a bad kisser or something?”
“We are not in high school and I’m not having this conversation with you,” he grumbled, feeling heat start to flood his face.
Thankfully or not, there was a strange fluttering sound on the other end of the line, followed by a muttered, “shit!”
“Everything okay?” Ryan had shown up at the ranch Mia and their mother now shared more than once, raging about the divorce decree and/or asking for a second chance in the next breath.
“Yeah, just dropped my book.” There was a long sigh and Jake imagined her settling back down onto the well worn cushion in the swing.
“What’re you reading?”
“A book.”
He rolled his eyes but felt a smile pushing at his mouth. She could always make him laugh. “Mia.”
“Jacob.” She snickered before continuing. “The author’s name is Georgia Torrance. She writes romances and if you judge me I’ll figure out a way to get your superiors to ground you from flying for, like, three days at least.”
Jake’s smile widened the slightest bit before something clicked. Georgia Torrance. That was the name on the strange books in your home. Can’t wait to see what you come up with next! You had written them, hadn’t you? Under a fake name, sure, but that was you.
If this were any other situation, Jake would drive back to you and simply ask if had a second job as a writer but he’d been banished from your house by his superior officer. So, he’d just bide his time with that, too, he guessed.
“I think I’ve heard of her. She has a few books, right?”
His sister giggled down the line. “Oh, they’re some of my favorites. Me and a few of the other girls have been getting together, like a book club, to read them. It’s fun.”
Jake smiled. She was doing okay, leaning on her friends. “You like those scandalous books, Mia? Gram would be mortified.”
Mia hushed him, but another giggle softened the blow. “They’re a great escape from the shitstorm of my life right now. Don’t judge me. They really are well written! And they’re so soft, Jake! Like, you can tell the characters actually care about each other.” There was a wistful sigh on the other end. “And she does this thing in all of her books.”
“Thing?”
“Yeah, the hero in some fashion or way, always ends up carrying the heroine to bed. Just to sleep. It is in all of her books. It’s her thing. Her trope, or whatever. It is so romantic.”
The sleepy, happy smile you’d given him flashed in his mind and the smallest bit of tension released in his chest. He had made you smile while doing something you, apparently, thought was romantic.
“Are you okay?” Mia asked, pulling Jake from his reverie.
His answering sigh crackled over the phone and he thought of your smile again. “Don’t worry about me.”
**
Someone was sitting on your bed. You had the vague realization of the weight as you teetered between sleep and wakefulness. “Jake?”
“‘s me, Punch.”
You smacked yourself in the face while attempting to wipe the sleep from your eyes. “Bradley? Aren’t you still supposed to be out in the desert with Captain Mitchell?”
“Yeah.” He sighed. “But my favorite mechanic was apparently auditioning for the Fast and the Furious and we cut the trip short.”
Even in the dark of your room, you could see Bradley smile. “You hate those movies,” you said, hating how your voice started to quake. Hadn’t you cried enough?
“I do. Now, are you gonna tell me what happened? And why fucking Hangman was acting like your guard dog?”
Heat dragged up your neck and you were thankful for the dark of your room so Bradley wouldn’t see you almost smile into your pillow. “Is he still out in the living room?” He’d stayed for you.
“Mav sent him home. Wanted me to tell him everything the second we got in.”
“Why didn’t you?”
Bradley sighed again and his warm hand landed softly on your arm. He squeezed it gently. “Had to make sure you were okay first. You will always be the priority.”
“I shouldn’t be,” you muttered. “God, I’m not worth any of this. You should have seen him tonight, Bradley. He just wouldn’t stop. It was a goddamn miracle I was able to get us out of that without totaling my car. And Jake was just…” Traitorous tears stung at your eyes but you let them fall because Bradley had seen you battered and bloody; he could withstand your tears. “Jake was so nice to me. Patient. He doesn’t deserve to be wrapped up in this. None of you do.”
“Hey,” Bradley started, whispered tone bordering on disappointed. “Stop saying shit like that. I’ve told you this a thousand times: you are worth everything. You deserve better than the shitty hand you were dealt. And remember whose dumbass started all this? Me. It was me.”
“It wasn’t you though,” you said, trying to breathe through the tears still trying to choke you.
But Bradley said nothing else but moved a little closer to you on the bed and pressed a kiss to your forehead. You weren’t entirely sure when you fell back asleep but you woke a few hours later with the first rays of daylight peeking through your curtains. It felt like you’d inhaled brick dust after being battered with said brick. Embarrassment was gnawing on your ribs as you rolled out from under your tangled blankets and set your feet on the floor. Everything had gone off the metaphorical rails last night. And a part of you ached at the thought of not having Jake around, even on the periphery, because you knew he would want nothing to do with you after he knew.
You stretched, hearing your back crack, and padded out toward the kitchen where you’d bet Bradley was waiting. And, yep, he was leaning against your counter, sipping on coffee you only kept in the house for him. His hazel eyes looked you over before he set down the mug, porcelain clacking against the linoleum. “You look like shit.”
“I feel like shit. Where’s Captain Mitchell?” You asked as you stepped into the kitchen, too, intent on getting to the lemon poppy seed muffins you saw sitting on the counter. Bradley’s hand slowly raising to block your path had you whining. “Why are you being me to me? I am in need of food.”
“You’re a brat,” he said with absolutely no heat. “And how many times has Mav said you could call him Pete when we aren’t on base?” He grabbed one of the muffins and shoved it at you. A few crumbs fell to your kitchen floor and you knew you’d have to sweep later. But not now. You took a large bite and almost moaned at the taste of it and continued to ignore Bradley’s question. Maverick was your superior. That was it. Keeping people at arm’s length kept them safe—well, you knew that he knew about your predicament but that didn’t mean he needed to be tangled up in it, too. “He picked those up for you this morning before he went to Penny’s for breakfast. Said Ice mentioned they were your favorite?”
You nodded and felt your lips curling up in a smile between bites. “He and Sarah took me to the bakery about a week after I got stationed here.” Tom had insisted that the poppy seed muffins were the best he’d ever tasted and after one bite, you agreed.
Bradley reached for one and hummed after he took a bite, nodding before taking another.
You two ate in silence for a little longer before Bradley, with his stupid baby cow hazel eyes, looked at you again. “What?”
“I checked the house over. It looks like nothing’s been messed with. But why don’t you come stay with me-”
“No.”
Bradley looked like he was trying not to sigh. “Punch, c’mon. It’ll just be until-”
“Until what, Bradley? I can handle this. He…he’ll probably disappear again and we can just forget this ever happened.”
“He tried to run you and Seresin off the road, Punch. Let me help.”
“You already did! You brought me muffins and checked out my house after staying the night when you should’ve been out in the desert and working on Mav’s plane. And that’s just today. You have done enough.”
Bradley’s eyes narrowed as he shoved the rest of the muffin into his mouth—which was ridiculous! He wasn’t even savoring it!—before sighing. “Fine. But you call me if you need anything, okay? Or Bob.” He then paused and you hated how his brow arched. That always meant he was going to say something he thought was clever but was actually stupid. “Or you could call Hangman.”
Embarrassed heat started to claw at your neck and you tried to ignore it and the knowing look in Bradley’s eyes. “You’re being mean.”
“You are asking me to tell him what the hell you have lurking in the shadows-”
“Don’t say lurking in the shadows. We aren’t in a horror movie.”
“-and you still refuse to see how much that guy is in love with you?”
The heat was now scalding and you were sure that your internal temperature had risen a few degrees, too. “Ken isn’t in love with me.”
“And you’re in love with him.”
Were you in love with Jake? No. That couldn’t be possible because, after everything, you knew that being in love and being loved just wasn’t in the cards for you. And the Navy would never allow it. And Jake was…Jake was your friend. And so far out of your league it was ridiculous. You weren’t his type anyway. And you didn’t have a type but if you did it would probably be…Jake. But you didn’t have time to think about that now because there was a tight feeling in your chest and your eyes were watering again and you knew that you were actually…probably…definitely…pathetically in love with Jake Seresin. Shit.
“Yeah, well, it doesn’t matter if I am or not. None of that matters,” you bit out as you blinked back the tears. “Also, when are you going to tell Natasha how you feel?”
Just as you anticipated, Bradley’s cheeks filled with pink and it was his turn to look away. “I’ve got a plan,” he muttered.
The smallest bit of tension slipped from your spine as you realized your diversion had worked, at least marginally. Bradley did have a bad habit of jumping back to conversations you had thought you had moved on from. Oh well. “So you’re not denying it anymore? No more ‘we’re just friends’ or ‘you’re reading into it,’ now?”
The pink in his cheeks grew darker as he reached out to lightly flick at your arm. “I guess.”
Well, at least you had this small victory. And god knows he had been ignoring his feelings for Natasha for years. You surely hadn’t been the only one to notice; Natasha was just as far gone for Bradley but she at least hid it better. You were sure only you and Bob knew about her feelings. “If I were mean, I’d make you tell me your plan. But I am feeling charitable today and will just wish you the best.”
“You’re such a brat.” He pulled you into a hug and sponged a loud kiss onto your forehead before stepping back. After you told him to go home and actually rest, that you’d be fine for the rest of the weekend, and Bradley once again telling you to call him if you needed anything, he left with a final, “lock your door!” thrown over his shoulder.
And then you were alone again. Your heart gave a startled leap when you heard a car door slam a few moments later but you heard your neighbor’s squeaky front door open and close and pushed out the breath you didn’t know you were holding. Great. You eventually swept the kitchen floors and double checked the windows before making the short trek out to your mailbox to check the mail. You stepped back inside and engaged all the locks before sorting through the small stack of envelopes and advertisements. Most were junk and quickly shredded and then put in the recycling bin. You smiled as you recognized your sister’s handwriting across one of the envelopes. Georgie still maintained that you should FaceTime every other week but her letters were a more frequent occurrence. This one was filled with details about her pregnancy and how her husband is being adorable about setting up everything in the nursery. She asked about your job and if you had any suggestions about what to get for your brother, Danny, for his upcoming birthday. You set the letter aside to flip through the rest of the stack but your heart fell to your feet when you saw the last thing in your hand.
It was another goddamn Polaroid. And part of you wished that it had just been you. Just you trapped in that white box. But no. It was Jake. Just Jake. It was him walking out to your car while you’d still been parked at the Hard Deck last night. Poorly drawn blood was bisecting his neck—it was supposed to look like his throat had been slashed, you assumed. It was a shitty drawing but it got the point across.
He could hurt Jake. He could hurt Jake simply because he was near you.
And you wouldn’t ever let that happen. There’d never been a threat like this before—Bradley and Bob never received one and you had been given no threats for them, either. So, it was just Jake. Just your Ken. You needed to keep him safe. Even if it cracked at something behind your ribs.
With all the subtlety of a freight train, you started avoiding him at work. If he walked in a room, you’d walk out. You bribed other ADs to be the ones to handle Jake’s jet. You didn’t go to the Hard Deck if you knew he was going to be there—which was more often than not. You ignored him whenever he called your name. It created a strange waiting game—you wouldn’t have been surprised if you had been called into Admiral Simpson’s office and reprimanded for disrespecting a superior officer. But weeks trickled by and nothing happened except Captain Mitchell giving you a disappointed look and Natasha asking if you and Jake hooked up and if it was bad enough for you to avoid him. After explaining that there was definitely not a hookup (true) and you definitely weren’t avoiding him (lie), you let yourself believe that you had managed to ghost him enough to keep him safe. When you received another Polaroid of you and Jake from the night of Junior’s party with Jake’s face scratched out and the words “I knew he couldn’t handle you” scrawled across the bottom, you knew you’d made the right choice. Then the next note, a singular scrap of paper tucked into the crease between your front door and its frame, read “all alone again? you never know how to treat them!,” your resolve only strengthened.
He could think you hated him forever as long as he was safe.
You could watch him flirt with every beautiful woman who looked in his direction and ignore how your entire body flinched at the sight as long as he was safe.
He just needed to be safe.
**
It had been three weeks since you had fallen asleep in Jake’s arms. And three weeks since you’d spared him more than a side-eyed glance. Rooster had been acting strange, too. While the other pilot hadn’t been avoiding him exactly, Rooster had volunteered to help Mav with the current Top Gun class and had been squirreled away in his office or in the classroom when not in the air. And while Jake could have metaphorically cornered Rooster by asking him over the comms, he wouldn’t ever bring up your name like that when other people were listening. So, when Maverick decided that the newest class needed to be introduced to Dog Fight Football after three pilots got into a screaming match and nearly collided with Phoenix and Bob during a dogfight simulation, he knew this was an opening he needed to take.
In passing, Jake also took the opportunity to ask if the support crew would be invited and earned an unimpressed look coupled with a, “they have been told that they are encouraged and welcome to come, Seresin.” Jake didn’t even care that Mav probably (definitely) knew what he was really asking because he overheard you telling Fanboy that you’d be there because Penny wanted someone to sit with. Perfect.
And you looked perfect when he saw you the next morning. Sitting on a low rise sun chair with Penny at your side and your toes buried in the sand, you had on that pair of shorts Jake dreamed about and a loose fitting shirt with the Dagger Squadron emblem over your heart. You were beautiful. He wasn’t going to shy away from it any more. No more using ‘special’ to hide everything else he wanted to feel. You were beautiful.
Now, Jake knew he was good looking. There was no arguing that. So, why not use it to his advantage? He strode up to you and watched as you looked at him over the edge of your sunglasses. And your face revealed nothing. You were a stone wall when you craned your neck to look up at him but he was undeterred.
“Hi.”
“Hi, Punch.” He then grabbed the bottom of his shirt and pulled it off, dropping it onto your lap as he subtly flexed, crossing his arms over his chest. “Can you hold that for me?”
You seemed to freeze for a moment before grabbing the shirt and neatly folding it. “Sure.” Then you leaned to the side, completely ignoring him, and shouted, “Bradley! Give me your shirt before it gets wet!” Rooster’s shirt eventually turned into Javy’s shirt, Phoenix’s shirt, and Payback’s shirt, and then you made sure that Bob had enough sunscreen on. And Jake watched all of it happen, little more than another bit of sand on your periphery. Just as he was about to call it quits on this attempt, you called out to him. He turned to you to see you looking at him over the edge of your sunglasses again. “Pull up your shorts. You’re about to give everyone a show.”
Penny let out a choked laugh that she tried to hide behind her hand before Jake tugged at the waistband of his shorts, moving them up marginally.
“There you go, Ken. Now you’re almost suitable for public consumption.”
“I prefer private consumption, Punch.” Jake winked at Penny when she laughed again before turning his attention back to you. “I could give you a free preview after we show these kids how to play nicely with each other.”
Jake watched you roll your lips into your mouth before you turned your head away as you pretended (he was sure!) to straighten the small stack of shirts you had collected. “That’s inappropriate. And you of all people don’t know how to play nicely.”
“Oh, Punch,” Jake said, letting as much of his Texan twang seep into his tone as possible when he leaned down to make sure you could look him in the eye (or ogle him correctly). “I play very nicely.”
You licked your lips and looked away but Jake saw your throat bob. “Make sure to tackle Royal into the sand,” you said, mentioning one of the Top Gun pilots who had been involved in the screaming match. “He’s been acting up with the other ADs.”
Well, that was a start. Maybe. “You got it, Punch.”
Then, forty-two seconds into the game, Jake did just that. He looked back at you to see you hiding a laugh behind your hands while Penny roared beside you as Royal yelled about getting sand in his mouth.
The game continued and the grumpy group of pilots eventually started to get along–not as well as the Dagger Squad, but they were something special. Maverick seemed to agree with the exasperated look he shared with Jake and Rooster when they finally called it a day. Penny invited them all up to the Hard Deck for a drink and that seemed to smooth the rest of the rough edges this group came in with, or at least most of them. Maverick bought the first round but Jake was quick to buy another for the Dagger Squadron when that was quickly drained. And, because he was definitely trying to track you through the steadily growing crowd (covertly), Jake spotted you at one of the hightops outside on the deck. Bob and Phoenix were with you, laughing at something you said.
That was the happiest he’d seen you in weeks. Your smile was actually reaching your eyes—your eyes that finally had that light in them that had been missing.
A hand fell onto his shoulder and Jake swung around to see Bradshaw handing him another beer. Even though Jake was less than halfway into the one he already had. “Thanks, man.”
Rooster nodded and took a long pull from his beer before glancing at you, too. He rolled his shoulders before waving his bottle toward the door that led out to the beach. “Let’s talk.” He led Jake onto the sand with quick steps and then stopped just short of the water’s edge.
The other man was quiet for a stretched moment, quiet long enough for Jake to think he wasn’t actually going to say anything but-
“She saved my life.”
Jake tried to process the words before a scratchy “what?” was pulled out of his throat.
Bradshaw took another pull from his beer and then set the empty bottle into the sand by his feet. “The mechanic assigned to me when we were overseas talked a big game—his dad was some big shot who was buddies with the brass at the Pentagon. Name was Luke. He was a shit mechanic, to tell you the truth. Punch would sometimes come in behind him, usually after hours, and double check everything he did. I would talk to her whenever I caught her doing it. She was embarrassed and asked me not to tell anyone and for a few weeks I just didn’t see her, didn’t think anything of it, really. Maybe because I thought she was finally doing something about all the bruising I kept seeing crop on her face. She changed the subject when I asked her once if she was okay.” Jake knew what self-loathing sounded like and right now it was bleeding out of Bradshaw’s every word.
“Then, one day, we get sent out. I run in and half-ass my preflight checks because I was a stupid kid who wanted to make a name for himself. I wasn’t always so careful.” He bared his teeth for a moment. “Stupid. I was so stupid. I’m about to get into the slingshot and she just darts out in front of me, waving her arms and screaming something I can’t hear. She nearly gets taken down by MPs and other officers and I’m fuming, I’m so mad that the rest of my squadron get to go out and I’m grounded by some crazy mechanic.” He shook his head before his hands curled to fists at his sides. “But I’ll never forget how desperate she sounded, screaming that the routine maintenance I would have been needing for the past three weeks hadn’t been done properly. He had been drunk in the hangar. For weeks. When my commander looked my plane over, he said I was lucky I wasn’t sitting in a goddamn body bag. It was a ticking time bomb.”
Jake’s heartbeat was echoing in his ears as he looked at Bradshaw. But more was yet to come.
“I found her trying to hold her leg together just outside the hangar. That asshole took a pair of pliers and…” Rooster’s hand twisted and jerked and Jake could imagine the sharp tool moving like that, moving against you. “He did it just to…just to make her bleed and try to make her apologize for saving my life. One of her eyes was swollen shut and she…” His mouth twisted to the side as if he needed to compose himself before continuing. “She could barely tell me who did it to her before she passed out. Punch was in medical for a week. They wouldn’t let me see her; the only visit I got was from two star who asked what I knew. The next thing I know, she’s been sent back to her shore station and Luke’s disappeared, too. It took me months to learn that all that guy got was a damn Letter of Admonishment and a commercial flight back home.”
“That’s it? That’s all he got?” Rage punctuated each syllable, an unmistakable and inescapable heat starting to burn in his chest.
Rooster scrubbed a hand down his face before continuing. “And what makes it fucking worse is that she was dating him. Dating himand coming to the hangar looking like she’d just gone three rounds with a heavyweight and I didn’t connect the dots until that two star let it slip.”
The rageful heat in Jake’s chest splintered as he thought of you being hurt like that by someone you trusted. How could someone do that to you while claiming to love you? How could anyone do that?
“This was my fault. Mine. She may think it is all hers but if I had asked her just one more time if she needed help, I could have had Luke dishonorably discharged and Punch would be…”
Safe.
Healthy.
Unafraid.
“She was so in love with him and he made her believe he would be the only one who could ever love her. Got it in her mind that no one else would ever lower themselves to love her.”
There was a pointed look shot in his direction that Jake tried to not read too much into (right now).
But Rooster pressed on. “I took a gamble and called Tom…Admiral Kazansky,” he quickly reiterated. “He’d been just about as constant in my life as he could be, you know. Always said I could call if I needed anything. And I just needed her safe.”
The strange look in Rooster’s gaze kept Jake quiet despite the dozens of questions running through his mind.
“He learned what happened and what she did and the next day she gets orders to Hawaii. Then to Kitsap in Washington. The furthest east she got was Fallon in Nevada. She was firmly planted under Kazansky’s oversight. I thought it would keep her safe.”
“But she kept volunteering for deployments,” Jake said after Bradshaw fell into an agitated quiet, like he was searching for words. He didn’t think that your throwaway anecdote from the engagement party would mean this.
“That piece of shit somehow found out where she was going to be at a port call and arrived the day before she was supposed to get back on the carrier. He nearly strangled her to death.”
The murmured stories you had half heartedly given were starting to create a through line. “That was when Bob stepped in. He said they met on deployment.”
Rooster nodded. “Apparently that LoA was to blame for Luke not getting promoted. He blamed her. It didn’t matter that she could have gone in front of the brass and had him court martialed. It didn’t matter that she took money from his just-as-shitty father to keep her quiet. He still saw her as the reason he was given a goddamn slap on the wrist for nearly killing us both. She was still the one that managed to get away. He should be in prison and he was mad about not making rank. Bob was the one who dragged him in front of the brass but that basically amounted to nothing. Again. She refuses to go to the cops because she thinks they’ll just brush it off or cover it up like everyone else does.” He knocked his foot against the empty bottle for a moment before turning to look at you back on the deck. Jake looked, too, seeing you let Phoenix drag you around in a dance. You threw your head back with a laugh as you nearly fell. Bob was cheering you both on. “Kazansky then had her stationed here,” Bradshaw said as they both turned back to look at the ocean. “It was a smart move. Kept her safe. The pilots never stayed but the ADs rarely rotated out. She saw it as a glass half full type of situation—she was trusted with the planes of the best pilots in the Navy but she wouldn’t have the opportunity to deploy as often, if at all. I’m pretty sure Kazansky had Luke shadowbanned from any of the stations he oversaw.”
But now Admiral Kazansky was dead, that was unspoken.
“And now Luke’s back.” The words sounded muffled to Jake’s ears as he said them. His heart thudded against his ribs as his stomach twisted. Luke was back. You were in danger. There was no denying it now.
“He is. And she seems to think that you’ve gained that douchebag’s attention and she just wants to keep you safe,” Bradshaw continued, an edge of exasperation starting to soak each syllable. “You are both so fucking stupid-”
“Hey.”
“-but I need you to help keep her safe, yeah? She’s going to fight you on it. Even more than she has already. But-”
“I’ll do it.” The words punched out of Jake with his next breath. And he meant it. “Whatever you think I need to do, I’ll do it.”
His wingman almost smiled at that. Almost. But he shook his head instead. “Seresin-”
“Punch?”
Both Jake and Bradshaw whipped their heads around back to look at the deck.
“Punch?!” Phoenix was leaning over the railing to crane her neck to the side in search of you, presumably. Bob was doing the same in the opposite direction but his face was scrunched in something almost like fear. “Punch?”
You appeared around the corner, balancing a tray of new drinks for your little group. Both Phoenix and Bob’s faces relaxed as they took the offered drinks, each kissing your cheek in thanks. As you set the tray down and said something to them Jake couldn’t hear before you turned just enough to see Jake looking at you. The carefree smile on your face faded as you glanced at Rooster at his side. You knew he had been told. Your chin tucked to your chest before you abruptly turned back to your other friends.
You truly thought he wouldn’t still want you?
That rage returned, burning behind Jake’s ribs. Not at you. Never at you. At Luke who had beaten you down physically and emotionally hard enough for you to believe that no one would love you.
But Jake was here. He would always be here. Waiting for you.
A/N: thank you for reading! Please let me know what you think!
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galedekarios · 2 months
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hope you don't mind this completely unsolicited ask but anyway the constant "Gale is mean to sorcerers" discussion drives me nuts too. the Tav i made to romance Gale is a wild magic sorcerer because there are a couple of actually pretty sweet interactions between wild mages and Gale, i wish that was the dynamic people explored more often. my sorcerer thinks of magic as a hassle at best and a curse at worst and their relationship with Gale is what helps them accept it not just as a part of themself but as something to be embraced and celebrated (and helps them learn to control wild magic surges) - while they at the same time help Gale see his value *outside* of magic. i am so sorry for the ramble i just really like sorcerer/Gale stuff i wish so much of it wasn't about trying to "knock Gale down a peg" or whatever.
i don't mind at all, anon!
thank you for your message and i'm sorry it took me a bit to reply. i still don't have the spoons some days, but i'm trying to get back into writing more again (for asks and for meta, for hcs and for ficlets).
i do actually like the dynamic a wild magic sorcerer and gale can have as indicated by the wild magic sorcerer tags and gale's responses to them. i should have added that in my original post.
he's very good-natured, interested in their stories (stephanie the cow) or tries to emphasise with the things that was past their control sometimes (with gale emphasing again, given his own childhood and most recent magical affliction).
i think the dynamic gale and your wild magic sorcerer has sounds very sweet and definitely more based on mutual respect and helping each other.
my "complaints" - i don't even want to call them that because at the end of the day it's just a preference - are more about me being super tired of people taking the sorcerer options outside of the game at face value, not seeing how arrogant, rude and clownish they are, especially when they are aimed at a character like gale, who is leagues above and beyond in terms magical abilities and his very connection to the weave.
which again brings us back to the point where i think the real problem is for people: that a character is more powerful and capable than their oc and them not being able to stomach that at all.
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sweetmage · 4 months
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Many Things (Gale/M!Tav fanfic)
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Rating: G Word Count: 1,766 Tags: Awkward flirting, secret identity, drow Tav
Summary: Though the other partygoers have made it clear they don't wish to share Rhidyl's company, he'd prefer to spend his time with Gale anyway. After all, Gale promised he'd share his list of all of Rhidyl's best attributes, but Rhidyl has a few hidden traits of his own to bring to light.
Notes: I just wanted to write a little thing for them. See replies for more context for Rhidyl's motivations + info/sources about the drow words used :)
"Were I to recite that list," Gale began, fumbling his words through an earnest grin, "I fear we'd still be here at dusk tomorrow. Many things, I assure you, but a conversation better saved for another time."
Rhidyl exhaled through the nose, head cocked in disapproval. "If I'd any good sense I'd think you were trying to be rid of me." 
"No," Gale responded in quick defense, hands raised and waving in a flurry, "No, never. I just thought you may wish to return to the others, mingle, enjoy the festivities."
"Would that they would have me,” he shifted, arms folded over his chest, “but they've all seemed rather eager to run me off."
"Oh..." Gale winced and peeked out at the crowd then drew his gaze back to Rhidyl, a little too tipsy to hide his relief at the outcome. "Their loss. If you truly want to waste away your evening in my company then I'd be as much of a fool to stop you."
"At least one among us has taste.” Rhidyl's expression eased a touch. “Now carry on with your waxing poetic about the finer points of my person."
"Well your humility is certainly not among them," Gale buried a chuckle with another deep swig of wine, "but for all your posturing and bluster, I know you are a good man. With a good heart." He punctuated his words with a firm pointer against the smooth, exposed skin of Rhidyl's chest, though he drew it back in the same breath, holding it as though he’d been burned. "Sorry... all that is to say, I find that admirable. I also find that you are a fine swordsman. Where did you train?"
It wasn’t so much the question that startled him as it was the lack of a suitable answer, nothing but half-formed, unconvincing lies resting behind his teeth. Though his stoic features told no tales, he must have hesitated just long enough for Gale to know he had touched on something forbidden.
“Off limits, I apologize. We won’t go there. I was only curious. I myself was a student of Blackstaff Academy, I’m sure you’ve heard of it.”
“From you, no less.”
“Oh yes, of course, I did mention that, didn't I? Silly me. With all that has transpired, I find my mind wandering at times, I can hardly keep track of it all. Tadpoles, am I right?" Gale rambled on, and on, and on, until Rhidyl could scarcely follow, his words spilling together into a slurring stream of consciousness that would have made any seasoned tavern-goer blush. But he smiled lightly and lent his ear, drank it all up, and let it drown out the clamor from the far side of camp.  When he tired of his own tales, Gale halted himself with a forceful clearing of his throat. "For whatever it's worth, I am grateful for your company, even if the circumstances of our meeting were less than desirable. But, that is more than enough of my prattling, perhaps my mouth could serve you better by—" Gale's eyes widened and so too did Rhidyl's, their gazes locked for a tense, uncomfortable moment. "I meant— oh, hells... By talking, of course. About other matters than your personal life. Now."
"You've such a way with words. Go then, show me what wonders your mouth is capable of."
He was visibly sweating now, skin dewy in the torchlight as he shifted where he stood. "Maybe I should just... get back to the point. The list, the many things you are beyond exceptional at. Getting right under my skin, for starters." He smiled and attempted what Rhidyl could only assume was a playful wink, though it only served to deepen the pleasant crinkles at the corners of his eyes. Then his face fell, lips tilted down and brow drawn tight above his earnest eyes. "And the simple fact that you could be anywhere and yet you choose to while away the night in the company of a babbling wizard with a most volatile condition. I have not the words to thank you."
"Then don't. While I do so love your praises, I've a mind of my own. You are far less tiresome than the horned ones, and far less troublesome than the rest. I can think of worse company. And besides, come tomorrow we have much to face. That oak of a druid spoke of paths forward, and if I'm being quite honest, my mind has remained there and left little room for celebration."
Gale seemed to sense the shift in the air and sobered to the reality of the moment. "Indeed. We are certainly not without our choices, though none seem particularly favorable."
"Perhaps in your opinion. A journey through the Underdark is no trifle, but it is the safest route."
Gale let out a low, rumbling laugh. "Safe for who, exactly? The drow amongst the goblins we faced were less than welcoming. I'm not so sure we'd find a better reception should we stumble into their domain. If we do not keep our wits, even the best case scenario sees us dead in a tenday."
"Usstan orn mrigg udossa." 
His brows shot up in surprise and he set his glass aside, leaning in to study Rhidyl with a quizzical expression as though he'd just materialized before him. "I know the tongue of the elves, but that was no language of the surface."
"You could say I'm fluent in more than swordplay." Rhidyl shrugged. "After all, the domain of the drow is also my own. I'd rather not gamble with the unfamiliar when the familiar can be relied upon. As I said: I will guide us."
"Just a moment.” Gale was shaking his head as if to force the thoughts within to settle. “Let’s take it back a few steps here. I am not one to judge so forgive me if this is a bit forward, but how does one of human and wood elven blood come to live among the drow?"
"They don't. I have misled you, perhaps a poor thanks for your kindness, but it was necessary. I don't quite fancy being left alone to trade my sanity for tentacles, but for all I knew, you lot would sooner leave me for dead than travel with one of my kind. But now that you need me, my secret is out and at your disposal."
"Ah, I see..." But Gale's eyes said otherwise, roaming his ashen complexion and shocks of red hair, seeking the answers that evaded him. "Well, this changes nothing. I have seen what you've done for those children, those refugees, for us… for me. That I know to be real. Under what pretenses you did so hardly matters. I trust you. And that's not just the wine talking."
"A wise decision. I hope you will remain as open-minded when dawn breaks and your head clears," Rhidyl responded, the tiniest glimmer of relief in his gaze. "And it's dye. I feel a fool for choosing one so garish, but not nearly as much of one as those who never noticed."
Gale chuckled softly, his smirk tilted to one side. "Oh trust me, we all noticed, we're just far too polite to mention it. What you were concealing with it is a different matter, I always assumed it was a fragile ego."
"My ego was quite intact before, you could have spared me that detail." Though he spat the words, Rhidyl was not angered. Quite the contrary, the playful twitch of his lips giving him away. "I suppose I should tell the others come morning. There's no use keeping up the charade. I look forward to a day where I am not cooked beneath your blazing sky. I am not merely a dark elf but d'korit'al waess, 'albino' as I believe you'd call it. Perhaps now I may reasonably request we travel more under nightfall or at least when the sun is less vengeful."
Gale's features softened as his curiosity was sated, replaced by a sort of pity. "If you're worried for your skin, I may have a book or two with solutions. When the others have cleared out and when my brain has cleared up, I can prepare you something suitable. That is, if you'd like."
"That would be... very generous of you." Rhidyl shifted his weight, arms tightening around himself, gaze turned to the side. "I'll not say no."
A silence fell between them, filled by the distant chatters of merriment and the occasional clang of glasses. 
"I appreciate you spending this time with me. And for trusting me to be the first one privvy to the truth. If it means anything, I am honored. You are a welcome distraction from the horror that has been brewing within my chest. I hope you know what a gift you've given me. I feel lighter."
"As do I..." His voice was but a whisper, his eyes on his scuffed leather boots, a heat in his cheeks. "But you'd best stop flattering me lest I let it all go to my head. And for what it's worth, you're not so bad yourself. I had once thought your kind the most loathsome beasts but now... well, the jury is still out. You, however, have made your case."
"From your lips that is quite the compliment," Gale laughed, his fond gaze lingering there a moment before shifting back towards the party. "I remind you, I have no intentions of shooing you away, but another seems to be waiting their turn."
Rhidyl's eyes drifted towards where Gale had turned, finding Alfira smiling a ways back with her lute and crinkled papers in one hand, the other waving him over as soon as she'd caught his attention. 
Rhidyl sighed and adjusted his glasses, giving Gale a firm nod. "I suppose I better go see what's got her in a fuss. Perhaps she's finally composed a ballad worthy of my greatness. Hopefully one of my ears as well."
He took a step back and paused, taking Gale in for a long, quiet moment until his words broke the silence. 
"I'll see you in the morning," Gale said, looking almost hopeful as if they didn't share a camp and it wasn't guaranteed. If there was something about his presence he longed for…
Rhidyl didn't dare dwell on it on, merely flashing him a tight-lipped smile as he took another step back, one hand held high in parting. "Of course. Goodnight, Gale. Pleasant dreams." He turned from him quickly and dragged himself off, fingers still tracing the spot Gale's had touched. 
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dreamsndmadness · 10 days
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hellooo!!!(sorry in advance for all of the rambling)
first of all, im absolutely gushing from all of the soft moments in ch9: feyd nearly crying from being cared for, paul helping feyd with his nightmares, and feyd being protective/caring in both the breakfast scene and throughout the spice field inspections :333. It was all VERY adorable and paul finally being unhesitating about his sexual relationship with feyd and them communicating (both implicitly with paul reading feyds body language and explicitly with paul making feyd ask for what he wants), it's all very rewarding in general :)
Also, ive just been thinking nonstop about all the stuff going on with paul. so, my first theory about pauls exhaustion was because he was staying up because of feyds nightmares waking up but then i re-read it and saw paul was tired even before they shared a bed, and then i remembered that lack of sleep is a common symptom of pregnancy so thats my leading theory rn, that OR paul is staying up late reading lol. im also so interested in what paul and lady jessica are plotting, they mentioned controlling feyd and learning more about him in the beginning and then theres the date palm scene. I remember in the movies that date palms are definitely on arrakis so my first thought was that feyd was being a paranoid little freak about it but then i thought lady jessica might be trying to assess pauls health or something?? its safe to say im super hyped for the paul POV
sorry about the length and INCREDIBLY half formed theories
( •̀ - •́ ) ₊˚⊹ ᰔ
The wonderful bowl100!!
I love your questions ☺️. Omg yay!!! I’m so glad you liked the chapter. I always have a crisis of confidence when I post new chapters 🙃. Yesss. The softness. Feyd cutting the fruit and making sure Paul eats was one of my favorite moments from the chapter. It’s so hard to write moments of tenderness from him without it seeming out of character. And then he can never be honest with himself about why he’s doing things or why certain things are making him feel certain ways. Man. This guy. Feyd used his words FINALLY!!! And yes!! I’m so happy for Paul. Starting to enjoy himself. It’s so important.
Okee so here’s what I can say. You aren’t wrong about any of your guesses per say. It’s been such a joy to write from Paul’s pov because he’s a much more emotionally evolved person so I can write him being like “ah yes. This is making me feel this way!”. So one of the biggest reasons for Paul’s exhaustion is that he has been having dreams. Some of them good, some of them pretty disturbing. And yes, we will be seeing them in the next chapter. He is also (not really a spoiler cause it’s in the tags) pregnant! Another big reason! That’s going to be a plot point of the next chapter as well.
Lol the date palm scene!! You’re right on both counts. Feyd is being a paranoid little freak. He’s like “they are speaking in code!!” No you weirdo, they are talking about date palms. However, I am going to give him a little credit because he did pick up on the weird energy of the scene which is basically due to Jessica trying to draw Paul out of his funk. She’s worried about him and thinks he’s not doing well, and she’s trying to cheer him up and also trying to subtly (probably too subtly) signal to Feyd to do the same. Which he kinda gets! Cause he then invites Paul to come with him on inspection and Jessica is like “thank fucking god you are so fucking dense”. To Feyd. Not Paul. Paul can do no wrong in Jessica’s eyes lol.
Anyway! All of your theories were pretty spot on and perceptive!!! Sorry it took so long for me to respond 😔. I’ve been sick this week and it’s been a struggle. I have most of Paul’s chapter finished (it’s sitting at 5,500 words right now 😀). And I hope to edit and post tomorrow!!
Thank you as always for your lovely questions. I look at your wonderful art every day 🥹.
All the best 🫶.
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mk-writes-stuff · 15 days
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Character Voice Tag
Rules: rewrite the line in the voices of your OCs
Thanks @willtheweaver for the tag! My line is, “I overslept.”
Belladonna: “Oh no, I overslept. How did I sleep through all three alarm clocks? My parents are going to kill me.”
Cassie: “Ah fuck, miss anxiety personified is already up. No workout for me this morning, I guess.”
Nellie: “Oh dear, I missed my alarm! I’d better get going.”
Narcissus: “Oh, just move my appointments. Nothing could be more important than my beauty sleep, anyway.”
Ricinus: “I overslept? Why didn’t that servant girl wake me up before she left?”
Goldenrod: “Oh, I am so dreadfully sorry to have slept in so late. I’m afraid I must have been so tired after last night.”
Cassiopeia: “How did I sleep through my alarm? I never do that.”
Stellaris: “Oh no, I’m an hour late. My breakfast is going to be late, which throws my whole schedule off, and I can’t be late to meet with Cassiopeia or she’ll be so upset…”
Rhys: “I need to get to work, or the cook will kill me. Maybe Goldenrod will tell her why I was late?”
Sel: “Oh no! I’m late! Um, yes, my apologies, everyone.”
I thought this one would be really difficult but it turned out to be pretty fun! I was able to put a lot more character in these than I expected.
@illarian-rambling @kaylinalexanderbooks @rkmoon want to play? Your line is, “That is the ugliest thing I’ve ever seen someone wear.” (Outfit description optional but welcome)
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gmanwhore · 1 year
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Well better get this ramble over with sorry if it sucks I am tired as fuck. Anyways this is my au where I assign all the main HLVRAI characters Will Wood songs and give them even more trauma. This will make no sense I can't explain it properly help.
Small guide:
Plot first
Character roles
Character descriptions
Tags for people to see this: @benreyplushie @catbitsysinteractsxd @breakcoreboxcat @pigeonwheel
Ok so like Gordon left the game, but all the characters were still there. The world hadn't shut off for some reason. They were all left stranded in a dead storyline. It was decided that they would simply....build a new Gordon. Of course, this new Gordon is not quite right, but no one knows how yet. They all try to move on.
We now zoom to the future. The Science Team all live in a sort of town together, but it's no longer going well. In the beginning everyone had gotten along well, but because they are trying to progress a story without a main character they are literally breaking their universe, and that is taking a toll on everyone. The characters are pretty much decaying as they try to continue their own story.
Gman is technically running the town, but due to the breakdown he has hidden himself away from everyone else to avoid the guilt of being the one to suggest this. He hadn't meant for everyone to decay, he hadn't known that insanity of this level was a side effect of forcing a storyline. He's slowly losing the ability to talk anyways. Because of his guilt it has gotten to the point where no one is allowed to visit his room but Tommy, and even then Gman can't stand it because of the guilt.
Coomer has stepped up as leader of the little community, and he seems fairly normal, barring the fact his flashes of self awareness are much more frequent and are slowly causing permanent damage to Coomer. He is nearing the point of no return, when he will won't be able to close his eyes to the truth anymore. Of course, how he acts when aware is unfortunately much more similar to the Coomer clones scene then any other time. He desperately wants to leave, and now he has the added bonus of not wanting to die of his mind being wrenched apart. Because of the struggle he has had trouble with interacting with the rest of the Science Team, and he's grown a bit more distanced.
Benrey is still upset he was the villian. He can't get over the fact that he died, that who he thought were his friends killed him. Even if he knew it was coming it still hurts. He's actually the least affected by the mass breakdown. Sometimes he will actually make it worse for people. (he was the first to be banned from seeing Gman after giving him a morality crisis) Benrey mostly just doesn't care anymore. Since the story is over he doesn't have to fit the role of a villian anymore but it's all he knows so he's going to lean into it. He does try to be nice, but it usually backfires.
Bubby literally doesn't care. He's let the breakdown fully consume him, and accepted the fact that this is how it will be. He's actually kind of enjoying it, as now his odd behavior isn't questioned. He also just leaned really heavily into the mad scientist trope. He's currently trying to build a rocket so he can finally see the stars like he's always wanted too.
Tommy is trying to help everyone. He knows this whole situation is hurting everyone, and he just wants them all to be happy. Everyone is glad to have his help, but most people are a little too eager to have someone who is willing to help them in any way possible. Tommy has become a caretaker for everyone, and it's beginning to take a mental toll on his because he can't fix anything and that makes every effort to help people just pointless because nothing will change.
Gordon knows that he is just a copy of someone else. He is keenly aware of this, actually, and Benrey never wastes an opportunity to remind him. He doesn't even know who he's based on because everyone explains Gordon differently so if he tried to be all of them he'd end up contradicting himself which he doesn't want. He's just suffering at this point.
Aight so like...they look different in the au and I leaned wayyyy into puppet imagery so slay. Also I just want to say the black liquid is a physical representation on mental decay. Mhm I am so cool and slay.
Gman
Song; Thermodynamic Lawyer esq G.F.D
Description: Gman looks a lot more like a ventriloquist dummy then anything. His face is too smooth, and his mouth goes up and down instead of opening. There is a large crack in his mouth that allows something dark and sticky to ooze out. His suit is no longer blue, it is the hot pink and black checked pattern of a glitch.
Coomer
Song: Suburbia Overture/Welcome to Mary Bell Township!/Vampire Culture/Love Me, Normally
Appearance: Coomer's eyes are now permantly lime green, and constantly spinning. He had strings, but they are quite obviously broken and drag on the ground. His eyes leak that same dark substance. When his personality shifts, his head cracks open and falls in half just slightly.
Benrey
Song: Laplace's Angel (Hurt People? Hurt People!)
Description: Benrey looks the same, except instead of his uniform being blue it is golden and glowing. He also has a halo. Half of his skull is exposed, and he has bullet holes all over him seeping the dark substance. He still has strings, and they seem to be attached to something above him though what that something is no one knows.
Bubby
Song: 2econd 2ight 2eer (That Was Fun, Goodbye!)
Description: Bubby has gained a third eye, it's iris is cyan like his text colour. His arms up to his elbows are blacked and charred, but still usable. All the clothes he wears are torn or shredded but not in complete disrepair, it seems almost artistic. He will occasionally leave wet black hand prints on things.
Tommy
Song: Skeleton Appreciation Day in Vestal NY.
Description: Tommy is missing an eye, and while it's mostly covered up with his shirt he is missing the skin and muscles from his chest. The lost eye had been replace with a button. Parts of his skeleton are visible at times, but the spots seem to move around his body at random. The gaps in his flesh ooze the black liquid.
Gordon (Sunshine)
Song: Dr. Sunshine Is Dead
Description: He appears to be made of fabric, unlike everyone else who either has a wooden or plastic appearance. His right arm is mangled beyond repair. He wears something akin to an HEV suit, but it looks more like pajamas then armour. His right eye is yellow, and his left eye is blue. His hair cannot be taken down from the ponytail, like a doll's hair that has been glued there. He lacks the black ooze.
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alittlefrenchtree · 1 year
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I’M GOING TO SPOIL STUFF.
I’m also going to tag as best as I can but we never know if Tumblr is going to fuck things up and better safe than sorry so. In this post there are going to be:
Screenshots from the first dune part 2 trailer
Informations you get from the book, either in the first part or the second part.
Maybe informations from the Messiah book? Not sure.
If you’re not sure, better not read and quickly scroll. But if you don’t care and would like to see my endless rambling about the trailer, and if you haven’t read the book and would like a bit more detailed context about the Dune universe, sit down with me for a minute 💜 
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I'll never never never be tired of watching the desert shot by Denis. This is so smooth, so calming, so satisfying. My soul is happy 😌
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This is the first shot of the trailer that made me go ohmygod. I'm not sure what's going on exactly in this scene but I find these few seconds SO POWERFUL for some reason. I'd wish Herbert would have done more with Lady Jessica in the whole story (even if her not being really present gives more room to other very interesting characters) but I can't wait to see Lady Jessica in this part 2. The glimpses we see in this trailer are exciting (to say the least).
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When the talk was all about Florence vs Anya, I thought Anya was closer to what I had physically in mind for a character like Irulan. Seeing the trailer now, I think Florence's smartness, attitude and personality might be a very good thing for Irulan. Good move, Denis, good move.
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I love this shot and I love it even more because it could look like something form The Messiah. Or even the Children. Incredible. I love that Timmy's account used it for promotion.
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AH. That's where all the problem start. And the spoilers. I'm not sure what will be said in the movie so, maybe I'm not spoiling much but, still. Anyway.
If you don't know, this is Feyd-Reutha. He's the Harkonnen Baron's nephew and his heir. While Paul is the Baron's grand son. In the Bene Gesserit's plans, Paul was supposed to be a girl and marry Feyd. Their kid was supposed to be the Bene Gesserit's Kwisatz Haderach. As you must now from the first movie, all of this was fucked up because Lady Jessica gave Duke Leto the boy he wanted. In the book, Feyd is supposed to look a lot like Paul, to be a charismatic figure like him and everything. I'm not sure choosing to make Austin look like what they decided all the Harkonnens should look really serve this idea? I get that it's a good idea for cinema and a movie targeting the largest audience possible that Harkonnens all look similar so everybody can quickly understand the different sides, families and who's good and who's bad. (Truth is, everybody is bad in Dune. Except the mouse. The mouse can stay.) But, I also think that nothing looks more powerful and dangerous than a bad guy looking like a good guy (in narration standards). If I remember correctly, Feyd can be read as a bit of a mirror for Paul's character and I would have like to see a bit of this physically? I don't know. I want to be convinced because I am not really right now.
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I love sci-fi and fantasy universes exactly for these aesthetics. Mysterious items. It fascinates me probably because I would have no idea about how to write these kind of things myself.
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I clearly remember the moment I've read how Paul's skin was supposed to look like after 3 years living in the Arrakis' desert. And I remember thinking how the hell they're going to make this happened how Timmy's skin of all people. Like the guy would probably managed to burn in Glasgow so, I was doubtful. I still am since he still looks silky smooth for most of the trailer but i like the way his skin looks here. That being said, they seem to have made some kind of arrangement with the timeline of the story. I'll have more thoughts about it after seeing the movie.
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It might be just me but this piece of scene didn't sound very clear to me, even with memories of the book. Like, we don't know what looks like a normal worm ride so, are we supposed to understand what's going on and what's fancy? Plus what Paul's doing doesn't look fancy at all, it looks more like he's struggling sooo? It's not smooth, but not fancy either, so idk. Unless they're is a meaning of fancy that I don't know of, i'm a bit confused by this part. But this,
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this is genius. Perfect midway between admiration and fear. Exactly what is needed to look at Muad'Dib.
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I wonder why some parts are in black and white. Seems a bit easy for a vision and wasn't used in the first movie so it would be odd but i have no other theory.
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I'm a bit upset because if it's the scene I think it is, it was very different in my head. Maybe I don't remember correctly, but for me, in this scene Paul is talking to a couple of hundreds people top and is very close to them and for me it suits the Muad'Dib effect better? It's kind of hard to explain, especially in English, but for me, Muad'Dib doesn't really scream directly to thousands of people who can't barely see him to send them to war. I see him as a figure who will talk to the couple of hundreds people he's with and be so close to them you can see his reflection in their eyes. He's a legend in the sense of a belief. It's the idea of him, his words spreading from person to people and from people to person that make Muad'Dib who he is. I guess it would have been less impressive for a film like Dune but I was impatient to see this scene, a sort of prophetic version of his speech in the King, and now I'm not sure. I hope they did good but and that he's delivering his speech in a other scenery and then going there rather than having to shoot such a powerful moment in front of nothing and with no other possibility than to yell everything.
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After thought was to wonder if Timmy learned to radiate such confidence (especially in the scene of the second screenshot) for Paul or if Paul taught him to feel confident. Life as an actor must be so so weird.
Long story short, I know the movie is going to be fantastic but I have just a few interrogations about how certain things look. And last but not least, the work that the music does for this movie is PHENOMENAL, even if it's nothing that we haven't read before. Hans is a genius, I'd offer him my first child without a second thought. (i don't have kids. I don't want kids, so it's a way of saying, chill out.)
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