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weaselbeaselpants · 3 years

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Weird week behind me weird week ahead of me but I’ve done a lot of self reflection and came to the weirdest epiphany. The older I get the more I realize all my ‘problems’ with VivziePop - her thoughts on criticism; the choices she makes in story telling; some of the people she’s worked with (not that any of that’s my business; I’m not her mom) really aren’t about Viv, but more about her fandom.

I’m speaking of the preHazbin era Viv here and as someone who’s only watch horny fish jump at the surface rather than jump straight into the Hazbin-fandom, but given my ‘noncritical’ fellow fans have told me that the Vivziefandom now is also terrible - I guess I’ll go over my experience and make the most out of what I do know.

I followed Viv in 2009 and fell off in 2013 cause I kinda just lost interest and found myself wrapped up in other fandoms. I’ve always felt amicable about her content; I could give or take designs or the way in which she wrote characters -- ((Zech represent!!!)) but it’s honestly surreal and really fun seeing this person I recognize make it big and improve so much. Like I’ve said before I am very happy and very impressed with Viv doing all she’s done in the span of TWO YEARS. wow gurl.

Trouble is, there was the particular breed of fan who really made me...uncomfortable. They felt almost possessive of Viv’s attention. They sang praises about her work in a way that just made me want nothing to do with it because I was worried if I drew those characters these people would be like ‘hey, I’M Viv’s fav artist, not you!”. They would unironically write Viv messages like:

“you are a GOD” -- “I’m so not worthy compared to you” --“I wish I was as talented as you” -- “YOU ARE EVERYTHING AND CAN’T DO WRONG VIV”.

The kind of messages which were meant to sound flattering but, intentional or not, came off as gaslighting, like they were guilt tripping Viv about being better than them. This behavior, treating your favorite artist/internet personality like your superior and groveling like Starscream, it strikes a nerve with me; partly because I was this way with my favorite artists and influences back in the day, but also because once I got a taste of that treatment myself I realized just how bad it could be:

There was once a girl on dA who was jealous of me because of the attention I got on my art instead of her. I told her that I wasn’t gonna stop drawing but also that there was nothing wrong with her art and she’d find her place. It was weird being put in that position where someone is very clearly upset at you but also looking for your approval.

The second was some scumball who I blocked in 2016. He wouldn’t speak to me, only write condescending, backhanded comments on my art; check on my profile daily; call me a bootlicker (cuz I took commissions) behind my back; redrew my art and would talk about me in his personal artist notes about how I ‘probably wouldn’t see this’ - oh yeah all the while he did fan art of my characters but again never spoke to me when I replied. When I finally messaged him about his behavior he said he thought I was “really overrated” and “bad for the fandom” cuz I took money and kept him from getting the love he deserved. It took messaging another person within our fandom, one I had been in spats with online before, to finally realize I shouldn't put up with that bs....

That guy who was stalking me btw did so while I was well under 1.K watchers and am still pretty obscure. Anyway, I had one guy unhealthily watching me for the wrong reasons. Just one. This is why when Viv says she “hates creeps” I 150% believe this woman and am not about to call her a liar who just can’t take criticism. Like, if you really think that, I’m sorry but you don’t know what Viv’s gone through from both her critics AND fans.

Of course, a lot of people will be like “I bet you’re just jealous and really just want that kind of attention yourself so you’re preaching to the choir”, but like...no. I am envious of just about any creator who’s the social butterfly I’m not, but, like, if I'm jealous of an artist none of that is that artists’ fault. Ever. It’s my own issues with being comfortable with myself are at stake. If I criticize Viv’s work it’s not because I see her as competition or my Squilliam Fancyson; it’s because I’m a critical fan of animation and cartoons and have my own thoughts to share on the cartoons of an artist I’m familiar with. Jealousy/envy/mixed-admiration/godIwishthatwereme.jpeg feels are totally natural and valid emotions when you’re a creator. Envy becomes a problem when you internalize, weaponize, and scrutinize people on the basis of them being what you aren’t which -yes - some people do in the name of criticism. ((Although, I would hardly say some of the nastiest AntiViv folk are jealous as much as they are angry that this project they think is harmful is getting attention and using that as justification for some really shitty behavior of their own, which no, this post is not a part of by virtue of coming from a critical fan.))

Critique can come from either a good place or bad place; good critique can be used to bad ends and bad critique can come from a well-meaning place, and vice versa. It’s the difference between many a criticalfan having a sour taste in their mouth regarding the Viv’s base but persisting in a critique+admiration separate of that, and this asswipemonster trying to weasel his way into Spindlehorse while also bashing Viv on a public forum for clearly vitriolic reasons. He was a creep.

So yeah um please stop insisting that every Hazbin critic is just jealous’ because a) there are people who have a past with Viv’s base and that clouds their judgement, but in a lot of cases that doesn’t invalidate their feelings or thoughts on her work separate from that, and b) I’ve seen what clingy gaslighting jealous fans are. Spoiler: they’re not so much Annie Wilkes as much as they are Tommy Wiseaus. You don’t want Tommy Wiseau following you.

Another bad vibe I really picked up on that I can kinda confirm is still probably the case now: people think that they know Viv and the Spindlehorse crew and have the right to send them shit they don’t need or WANT to be seeing.

Like, I talked with Viv once ages ago. I don’t remember what I said other than we were talking about Frankenweenie, I think. She was nice. Outside of that she said “thank you” to my comments on her deviations but that’s it. I DO NOT KNOW THIS WOMAN AND unless you’ve worked with or are a legit friend/mutual of hers, NEITHER DO YOU. But I don’t think every Vivzie stan/critic knows this. Whether it be people assuming she MUST think they’re headcanon is now canon-canon cuz she liked a comment they made; or some critic thinking they must have seriously hurt her pride because they’ve been blocked by her on twitter (or you know, maybe she and the rest of Spindlehorse is tired of getting @s and don’t have to time to read through your analysis so they’re gonna just block and move on cuz they’re busy).

Just because the creators talk with fans doesn’t mean fans are literally their best friends and have a part in the show’s direction. And yes, critics and reviewers fit that bill as well. Know your damn boundaries people.

If you find/make some kind of contribution as a viewer that’s awesome but you should never expect nor DEMAND the creator see it. The most obvious horror stories involving this and Helluva/Hazbin have been the Instagrams made by the crew being harassed by incestpedo enthusiasts, but it applies even to just @ing creators as well.

I’ve seriously had someone tell me to just take my criticisms directly to Viv and like...no. Why would I do that?

I respect Viv and the artists working with her enough to know that they’re working their asses off on an animated series and should not be bothered. I don’t want them to stop all they’re doing and reply to me. I want them to keep working. Also, that kind of logic makes me wonder how many critics Viv’s found because she found it on her own or if some obsessed fan told her about it - which is really messed up cuz if it IS just good critique you’re, again, just pestering her, and if it wasn’t critique but full on harassment WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU MESSAGE HER ABOUT THAT ANYWAY? I’m sure she doesn’t need to be reminded that people drew and said really awful shit about her on Tapatalk. My point being I’m sure what people think they’re doing is

“OOOoh Viv lookitwut this person is doing in our fandom we need to ban together against this toxic behavior”

but what they’re actually doing, and sounding like, is -

“Hey Viv I know you are working so hard on the show and you’re trying to figure out where to go from here but LOOKITWHUTTHISHATERSAID. LOOKATIT! VALIDATE ME VIV AND PUT’EM IN THEIR PLAAAAAACE!”

TL;DR Viv’s fanbase back in the day consisted of everyman artists and interests but there was this one breed of fan -who I hope was just a vocal minority- that ruined it for everything else.

Call it stanning or ‘simping’ or as it’s classically known, ‘white knighting’, whatever it was it really soured a lot of people on her because of those fans.

That’s why the DollCreep drama got so bad from what I can tell. Doll and Viv had a falling out and then called out eachother online where people who took it upon themselves to speak for them starting throwing mud.

Back in the day I remember Viv used to get mad at artists for ‘stealing’ her style. I think this attitude from Viv directly has vanished but I remember it happening because one of the people she thought was stealing her style did art for me at some point and they were basically shamed/chased off deviantART by a gaggle of these really nasty Vivfans.

inb4> “VIV WAS AWARE AND STILL WEAPONIZES HER FANS THO”

I don’t know that. And honestly, where I’m inclined to believe she’d do something like that then I think Viv is really different and has improved her business and public image from her college days. I’d be very disappointed in her if she was pulling a Butch Hartman or Derek Savage, but I just don’t think she is one, k?

Viv is more self critical and aware than any of these uber protective-gatekeeping fans give her credit for. She said on the Pizzapartypodcast that she knows the Hazbin pilot wasn’t perfect; she’s been able to identify the problems with old Zoophobia; this woman knows that criticism of all kinds need to exist and from what I see she sounds like she’s trying to get used to that. It’s just, you know, when you have nasty antis badgering you, stalkers, obsessive yes-mam’ fans, opinionated shit posters, r34 artists, entitled shippers and the NDAs of a company alongside your own branded image - all that negativity, even the constructive bits, tend to clump together and you just want to scream at it so you can finish the damn cartoon already!!!!

TL;DR: PART TWO

VivziePop/mind is basically indie Tim Burton. Her work is fun, shallow and made with love but is marketed as being for everyone when it’s really not. Parts of it I love to watch; parts of it drives me crazy cuz of reasonswhatev this isn’t a review.

BUT any fanbase where people tell me I should just “expect what’s coming to me” when I’m trying to argue against dragging creators into fandrama is troubling. People have a parasocial bond with fandoms and their creators and they need to learn when to back off.

#vivziepop critical #hazbin hotel critical #helluva boss critical #critical fandom #I'm sorry to all the people I messaged n bothered over the past year bout my stupid thoughts #tw: stalker

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thliahls · 4 years

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b-b-b-back once again , cldn’t wait can’t be tamed .. as with all my intros .. tis a doozy so feel free to mssg me for a tl;dr if we feelin lazy i will totally understand , or scroll to the wc’s i tried to think of as many as possible bc i wanna plot wit every1 )): !! anyhaps like this n i will come force my heathen of a gurl on u !

⌠ GRACIE ABRAMS, 20, CISFEMALE, SHE/HER ⌡ welcome back to gallagher academy, THALIA HALL! according to their records, they’re a FIRST year, specializing in AWARENESS TRAINING, BREATH CONTROL, HAND TO HAND COMBAT + THREAT ELIMINATION and they DID go to a spy prep high school. when i see them walking around in the halls, i usually see a flash of dirt under a meticulously painted manicure, the shrill ring of her phone and poorly treated books creased at the spine. when it’s the (scorpio)’s birthday on 11/02/2000, they always request FISH FINGERS from the school’s chefs. looks like they’re well on their way to graduation.

biography / pinterest

was born in the states but dad and her moved back to england the year she was born, which was also the year he graduated blackthorne. his mother was ‘never in the picture’ which has left her imagination to go down several paths, discontent with all of them. unfortunately daddy dearest crafts a space where she’d never dare ask ! she has a bit of an obsession with the blackthorne graduation ritual because of it .

was immediately placed under the care of two retired spies, sort of a foster care system within the spy community. dad still visited whenever he wasn’t working and still technically had full custody over her. up until she went to prep school, led a very sheltered life. homeschooled by them, but they were fairly lax. her dad expected a certain amount of training to be done, but her and her foster siblings usually mucked about a fair bit. her training would always be done in the form of games which she discovered early on that she loved to win, it made her fiercely competitive.

was very spoiled by them, grew up in a huge country estate and excelled in her home school classes without trying, which made her extremely entitled. she’d often wrestle with her siblings in the garden , and bring them to tears . biting them, pulling their hair, slapping them around . it would earn her a slap on the wrist , but it was never anything a sorry couldn’t fix . spends her free time laying in the grass reading , and learning the romance languages and was raised speaking cantonese bc that’s her foster parents native language . more invested in the sociology of linguistics and how it can be used to assert and diminish power but only cares for this in a self-serving way .

spy prep rolls around and it’s very exciting ! as predicted ( by herself lmao ) she does well, without even having to try. socially , she drifts through groups , picking up on cues on how to interact , what works well and what doesn’t . doesn’t find anyone particularly interesting and would much rather be reading but by not having any sort of allegiance to one particular group , it ends with her being very well-liked . the top marks is unsurprising, further fuelled by some amusing competition , finding that her desire to earn good grades comes more from wanting to spite others than actually wanting to achieve good grades . finals roll around and she gets the highest grade in her year and in tandem with being well liked, earns her place as valedictorian . she’s very proud of herself, not for earning valedictorian, but for besting aylin .

in the months prior , on a field trip she meets a boy and for the first time in ever , exudes big dumb energy gets his number , starts texting him , starts sneaking off campus to meet him ... he’s a total casanova , a big romantic and exactly like the protags in the romance novels she reads . it’s a big prep school no-no but as long as no one finds out it’s fine ! then walks in aylin, and destroys her whole career by reporting her ( she doesn’t know for sure it was her , but has her suspicions since their rivalry had run throughout the entirety of prep school ). she’s kicked out , denied graduation , valedictorian and is humiliated . she calls her civilian boyfriend the night of , but his line’s already been disconnected , presumably threatened / beat up by her lovely dad .

her father is livid , but is able to use his connections to get her a place at another , less prestigious prep school and negotiates with the school to take her to and fro every day , like he’s picking her up from daycare . he stops working for a full year to do this , and expects her to feel indebted to him . the monotony of repeating the year makes her irritable, made worse by the snickers she constantly hears in the hallways . but she has gallagher to look forward to , knowing she’ll still be going there because continuing tradition is important to her father , who also decided her majors for her and had a big argument with him when she asked if she could take linguistics ! he makes her call him every single night at 6p.m. if she misses a call , he contacts the school . she hates him .

personality

passive aggressive emphasis on the aggressive : is always withholding judgement, but inevitably always lets a comment slip. think, ‘ you’re so confident to wear whatever you want to, ’ or, ‘ wow ! that colour’s so bright i almost need sunglasses ! ’ petty as hell in all respects physically too , spots a bruise on your arm ? you bet she’s gonna press it and ask if that hurts, then say sorry when you yelp .

hypocritical : detests people who don’t try but doesn’t try herself and justifies it by getting really good grades . believes there’s no point sleeping with someone unless you love them , then will drunkenly hook up with someone that very same night .

hope less romantic : she has no hope for others but remains a romantic . thinks people have given up on courting people and wooing them . expects flowers at her door , good morning texts and candlelit dinners . leaves secret admirer notes under people's door to people she thinks are cute and thinks she might have a crush on in the future , quite creepy but at least she doesn't use magazine clippings anymore !

spiteful : life is a game and she wants to win it ! makes everything into a competition , even unconsciously . goes up to the adjacent treadmill and makes the speed and incline several points higher than the person next to her . painting your nails with her ? she’ll make sure hers looks better and point out that you didn’t coat the ends of your nails . board game night with her is fun for no one but her , i’m so sorry if she ever ropes you into one !

bookworm : her disgustingly high standards about love come from her singular past relationships and books . read one too many jane austen’s and now she’s crazy

loyal : her loyalty is hard to earn , but once you’ve got it , you’ve got it .

*think the arrogant exterior of jesse eisenberg as zucc in the social network with emaline addario ( everything sucks ) type dramatics every so often to keep it spicy !

wanted connections

toxic friendship ! a slow burn relationship of passive-aggressiveness and co-dependency, one day they stop taking her shit or say they’re going to but always end up in each other’s company at the end of the day . or maybe one day they don’t come back to her and thalia is forced to admit she may have been too harsh .

hook-ups she has when drunk ! which she will only have when drunk , to follow her unspecified , no rights , belief system . will pretend like she does not know you the next day . oh to be a romantic , but a scorpio . a tough life .

people she has crushes on ! and leaves handwritten poetry under their door or in their notebooks , absolutely humiliating that she acts this way ! bonus points for a note that’s left under the door and the wrong person reads it .

sparring buddies but make it feral ! no rules sorta deal, out in the woods, scratches from twigs, bloodied rocks, anything to let some of her pent up aggression out . they can go swimming after : )

daddy issues gang ! someone hears her on the phone in the hallway , inquires , proceeds to talk about how much they hate their fathers . thalia tells them how she’s going to kill him one day <3 alternatively , her father may have been the cause or implicated in the death of your chara’s loved one .

roommates ! self-explanatory , but she probably dislikes them and is unfairly harsh on them . sets rules but lets herself be exempt from them stuff like that x also for berlin she requested a room by herself lmao n deluded herself into thinking she wld be accommodated , thus i’m going to leave whoever she rooms with up to fate and she will hate it regardless of whoever she gets roomed with !

someone who hates aylin as much as she does ! yes this is deserving of a whole connection , thalia would probably die for this person . alternatively , aylin’s friends who she hates as a byproduct of hating aylin or tries to get them to hate aylin .

rivals ! because it’s the only thing that motivates her to do well in school .

encryption major ! who helps her find out about her dad’s past , and present . what he’s done and what he continues to do . also a way for her to maybe switch one of her majors to linguistics and hacking a report that says she’s still in her predetermined majors .

take a chill pill ! someone who gets her to relax , makes her watch reality television which she relentlessly criticizes , but this person won’t give up trying to make her less of an awful human bean .

anything else ! i am , as the kids say , down to clown .

#gallagher:intro #im .. Shweaty so im gna take a shower but i shall msg as i soon as im squeeky clean #omg i always 4get my theme just doesn't format nything i promis it looks nicer in dashboard mode owo

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kyloreyorgana · 4 years

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STAR WARS 9 ! TROS SPOILERS !

In case this is not obvious enough, this post will contain SPOILERS for the last Star Wars movie, which I’m just now coming home from. These are my first thoughts. I have tried to tag as best I could so that people who mute the tags don’t see my post. Do not proceed f you don’t want to read any spoilers.

You have been warned. Long (and I mean LONG) post ahead.

First of all, I’m happy to be back y’all! Just with TLJ, I come from months (or has it been years already ?) of inactivity to jump right back into the fandom, as obsessed as I was back when I came home from TFA. Which is funny because at the time TFA came out, I had lost all interest in Star Wars and heard so many critics from people who’d seen it and said it was horrible and that Disney basically sold the franchise to the devil that I didn’t even want to see it, to keep the good memories closer to my heart. One night, one month after its theatrical release, I thought “aw fuck I might as well see it, at least for Carrie, Mark and Harrisson” so I went to the cheap theater that was near my home... I had zero expectation, and really I think it’s the reason why I loved the movie so much. I didn’t chose to ship Reylo, this ship whacked me like Harley Quinn’s oversized hammer with the Hades and Persephone aesthetics. When I came out, completely mesmerized with what I had just seen, I jumped on Tumblr as soon as I got home, and I ended up creating this blog just days later. I wanted more and more, fics, metas, fanarts, headcannons, theories, cracks, I could never get enough. For TLJ and TROS, I had lost most interest in the fanfics and the fandom (because as much as I love the movies and some people in the fandom, most of it can eat shit as far as I’m concerned). I heard so many critics of TROS already, I was afraid I was going to be disappointed. But I loved it. Only Star Wars can make me go from utterly uninterested to “Wow I can’t wait to see this new Star Wars in theater, what a time to be alive”, to a stage of total obsession that lasts for months. And that is the reason why I don’t give two shits about anyone disliking the movies. It’s sad you didn’t like them, but it made me feel the same way I felt right back when I was a child watching the original movies with my father. It feels like home. And that is the best thing I could ask for.

Like in TLJ, I cried as soon as I heard the first note of the opening. The last Skywalker story, the last time I ever see my Space Mommy on the big screen...

I know the Reylo community is about to be nuts. The whole movie, like TLJ before it, is basically a series of things we’ve already done in fics and theories. I am 100% positive I have read a fic where Rey and Ren try to hold back a ship with the Force and Rey ends up involuntarily shooting lightning. Whichever one of you did it is probably going to have a stroke in the theater. I nearly did.

And really, I wish I could see the look on the Antis’ faces when they see the movie. I’m sure it is a sight to behold. I wanted to scream “TAKE THAT, BITCHES” more than once. As in TLJ.

My biggest fear was what they would do with Leia. I knew Disney said they wouldn’t use CGI and chose to stick with the scenes Carrie had already shot, and I was afraid it wouldn’t honor Leia’s legacy. Well I... have mixed feelings. While the way they used Carrie’s scenes and made it look like she really is here is to be lauded, it sometimes feels like Leia had nothing interesting to say but they tried to put her in a dialogue anyway, because she needed to be seen doing (or rather, saying) something in the Resistance. And about her death... I still can’t put my finger on what exactly I didn’t like about it but I felt like something was missing. Watching the scene, at first I didn’t know if she was having a heart attack or if she stabbed herself or chose to give up her life because she somehow felt it was the moment, I’m still not sure just why she did what she did. I wish they put something more to motivate her decision and explain what exactly she does. I don’t know, a flashback of Leia holding baby Ben, a little more dialogue, something. Not just Leia suddenly getting up and going to bed whispering her son’s name.

I knew I was going to be disappointed. Among all the celebrities’ deaths, Carrie’s is the one that affected me the most, and believe me I was a wreck when Bowie passed. I miss her, I think about her every single day. And Leia deserved more, much more. When I saw TFA, part of the reason why I loved the movie was that, even though it pained my heart that Han and Leia’s son turned out this way, I thought they would make it right. I spent hours imagining a scene in the 9th movie where Ren would defeat Rey (incapacitate her the Skywalker style cutting her hand or something) and approach to give the killing blow, and Leia would enter the scene, pick up Rey’s lightsaber, look her son dead in the eye and say “Over my dead body, son”. Because Leia would never give up without a fight, even with her son. And she would get her son back, and her story arc would have been completed. I would have paid good money to see this.

Episode 9 was supposed to be Leia’s movie, just like ep. 7 was Han’s and ep. 8 was Luke’s. When Carrie died, I knew it would be compromised and it broke my heart, because Leia deserved better. She lost everything. Her parents, her planet, her father, her husband, her son, her brother, the Rebellion, the Resistance, everything. She fought all the way, all her life even faced with the worst odds she never gave up hope, she inspired hundreds of people to keep fighting for what is right, and she would never have a satisfactory ending. What a fucking heartbreak. She didn’t even get to see Lando. Leia deserved more. Every little girl in this world who grew up with her as a role model deserved more. But c’est la vie, as we say in French... My only solace is that I know fanfics and fanarts are going to make me feel a little better about it.

Of course I cried every time I saw her on screen, and especially when they honored her body, as we all honored Carrie when she passed away. This was one of the many fanservice moments, and surely the one I liked the most, although there was some concurrence (more to it later).

Another thing I didn’t like is what they did to Poe’s character. Many people disliked TLJ because of it, which they attributed to a political agenda of hate on men. This is so ridiculous and has already been debated enough that I won’t get into it. I did like the evolution of his character in TLJ, because for me it was an interesting character development as well as a good message: wartime is not only about barging in fights head first, shoot first think later, as is, let’s be honest, everything Anakin ever does. At one point, the narrative of the reckless hero who saves the day when a situation seems impossible and everyone begs him not to do it gets old. Sometimes in war, you have to think ahead, to plot, and yes, listen to what your allies have to say. And it actually was a good critic of toxic masculinity. Could the conflict between Poe and Holdo have been avoided with minimally sane conversation ? YES. But the message was here (as were Holdo’s hair and dress and WOW gurl) and I thought that was it, and Poe would evolve into a wiser person.

But this Poe is, at least in the first half of the movie, not very likable. Hear me, I never really liked Han Solo (never been into macho men) but I really loved Poe in TFA because he was genuinely nice and brave. Here, he’s bitter and annoying. I told myself that he was jealous of Rey because he heard of Finn’s crush on her and he wanted to keep Finn all for himself, which I know is just a crack headcannon, but hey, anything to make it better I guess.

Of course, I’ll never forgive Disney for not making FinnPoe a thing, when even Oscar Isaac ships them hard. And trying to make Poe flirt with the other girl (whose name I even forgot and whose face we didn’t even see, now tell me again how Star Wars has been corrupted by feminists... sigh) Speaking of, it is me or did two women kiss at the end ?

I liked the new droid, it reminded me of my puppy. But at the end, it was just another fanservice moment, it didn’t really do anything useful onscreen apart from being cute and funny.

When Rey was finally revealed to be a Palpatine as I hoped, I giggled like a wee girl. Watching TFA, I begged the old gods and the new that they wouldn’t make her another Skywalker, because it would’ve spoiled the Star Wars spirit for me. The whole franchise, in my opinion, is a story about fighting for what you believe is right, no matter who you or your parents are or where you come from. Even though Luke and Leia’s ended up being Vader’s children, they weren’t the only meaningful characters. Anakin was basically a Space Jesus and went from a total nobody to the Chosen One. I didn’t want Rey to be a Skywalker because it would mean that your importance would only ever lay in your bloodline, and that is depressing and totally against the spirit of the Rebellion/Resistance: no matter who you are, you can fight for what is right. For this reason, I wished for Rey to be either a real nobody or Palpatine’s granddaughter, which is also why I liked the fact that Han and Leia’s son turned out bad, even though it made me sad for them (Leia didn’t deserve this). No matter your bloodline, you can always make things right, or fuck up badly if you let yourself be taken away. And, of course, the reveal that Rey and Kylo Ren are two sides of the same coin (aka one of the many times where I picture us Reylos screaming CALLED IT in our seats) was exactly what I hoped for, a beautiful balance. I didn’t share Palpatine’s implication that a Palpatine and a Skywalker are meant to work together, though. That is not how I choose to interpret this duality. That is not what they end up doing, anyway.

Speaking of that old pal Patine, seeing the trailers I feared I would feel nauseated that they chose to reanimate the Big Old Villain, just like they reanimated the Even Bigger Death Star in TFA (how lazy can you be ?). But I enjoyed it. What saved it was Palpatine’s will to be killed by Rey to perpetuate the Sith rite of passage. I don’t even care if it’s cannon or not. I was afraid they would recreate Vader’s dilemma in ROTJ with Rey, but I liked the choices she made. And the throne scene worked for me. Like the rest of the movie it was flawed, for instance we don’t even get an explanation on how he survived. Just like we don’t even get what Finn wanted to tell Rey, even though it was emphasized several times. Was it a love declaration ? What happened to the rushed romance with Rose in TLJ ? (What happened to Rose, actually). While we’re at it, why did Palpatine want Ren to kill Rey ? So many questions. So many flaws.

And, of course I cannot comment this film without mentioning my sweet star-crossed lovers, Rey and Ben. First, I’m really eager to see your reactions. We did it, Reylos! Years of hate and slander and we were right all along. Let’s rejoice.

I like Rey’s evolution. For the moment, I don’t feel like I have too much to say about it (which is fine because this post is way too long already). I like the way she handles her emotions, I like her choices and her character evolution.

And Ben. Oh, sweet Ben. Although I think the part where he gets his old mask fixed wasn’t necessary, I kinda like what they did with him as well. I must say though that I liked his hair in TFA better. Oh boy, I loved Kylo Ren but I absolutely adore Ben Solo. And I think the way the movie depicts him even surpasses some fics. The moment when Rey gives him the lightsaber and he gets up and does the Han shrug ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I almost lost my mind. This ties with the hommage to Leia’s body as my favorite fanservice moment.

And their relationship... Look, I know I wet my pants really enjoyed myself in TLJ when they held hands, but that scene felt rushed even for me who ships them with the force of a thousand suns. Like many things in TLJ (and, as I said, also in TROS) it felt like things I had already seen in fanfics, but in the fics I enjoyed the most Rey had tried to kill him at least 5 mores times before even agreeing to have a one-on-one conversation with him. Their romance in TLJ felt like it was hormone-driven, but I get Johnson couldn’t really do a slow burn in 2 hours. When Leia died and they both felt it in the Force, I could feel that Rey wanted to touch him, to confort him, to grieve with him. I’m glad she didn’t. It wasn’t time. And I really like that she told him she wanted to hold Ben’s hand, not his. And Ben, the Dork Knight, finally realized that if he wanted The Girl, he shouldn’t, you know, threaten her and chase her but get back to the Light Side like she begged him multiple times. Because he really isn’t the sharpest knife in the drawer, this is apparently what makes him choose to tip over. That or the fact she saved his life. I was still frustrated by Leia’s death so I don’t know if I’m not entirely convinced because it happened just after, I’d have to watch it again. I liked Han’s moment, though.

And in my opinion, Rey and Ren’s fight on the wreck of the Death Star is as good as Anakin and Obi-Wan’s. My Reylo heart will always have a special place for their couple fight in TLJ (aka the best non-sex sex scene in cinema, don’t @ me) but I also liked this fight in light of their relation. Surprisingly, it reminded me more of their fight at the end of TFA, when we see Ren holding his blows and Rey barging in. I thought it was endearing.

The end. Oh my god, the end. I can’t wait to see the first gifs and I really really can’t wait for the HD gifs, because oh boy, I now only live for Ben Solo’s smile. That’s it, I found my will to live, my depression is cured. And the way he handles Rey’s body with the utmost care (while Finn apparently watches it and does or says nothing). And that kiss... And the SMILE. And the KISS.

Oh, dear gods. Oh dear.

I can’t wait for the first fics in which Ben doesn’t die and they live happily ever after on Tatooine or Naboo or wherever they damn want. Or the fics where he is indeed dead and they still share a beautiful relationship (if Force Ghost Luke could get his X-Wing out of the water, I’m eager to imagine what Ben would do with his Force dick, tongue and fingers. Forgive me, it’s getting late and I’m still flustered thinking of their kiss)

And the fact that she declares herself a Skywalker ? I know a lot of people are disappointed in this, but apart from the fact that she completely deserves the title in my opinion when she inherited the will of both Luke and Leia, which is reason enough, she is absolutely married to Ben and deserves her place in that family. Also, it’s again a beautiful way to remind you that bloodlines don’t matter as much as what we choose to do with our lives. And while I’m glad they showed Leia’s Force ghost (I would’ve been really mad if they didn’t) I’m super frustrated they didn’t show Ben’s. What am I to believe, that he gave his life for her, became one with the Force and vanished into litteral nothingness for him to never be seen again ? Like hell I don’t. Again, counting on the fics and arts to right this wrong.

The movie sure has its flaws, and I still have many unanswered questions, like what the fuck is the badge Maz gives Chewie, or how Rey does her lightsaber staff at the end, and I wish they explained some things better. I wasn’t sure if the saber Leia wanted Rey to have was hers or her mother’s. Most of those questions will be answered by bigger geeks than me in this fandom, so I really can’t wait to read from y’all.

I know a whole lot of people are going to hate the movie. The antis, the gatekeeping trve fans (already I’ve seen people say that those who enjoyed the movies are not Real Star Wars Fans and welp, we’re going to see a lot of shit). The manbabies who genuinely believe in a feminist takeover and see equality as a direct threat. I’m specifically happy they will be disappointed while I got the privilege of enjoying Star Wars as much as I did. It’s not my fault, or Disney’s fault even, that they turned out to be on the Empire’s side. And the day has not come when I defend a megacorporation.

Leia was the first SJW. The Resistance lives on. People will always fight against evil, like it or not. I know the world is a shitty place and we don’t have much hope nowadays for things to get better, and Star Wars has always motivated me to keep going and stick to my values and my convictions. I felt chills several times in the movie, like at the end where everyone comes to fight, and now I’m more willing to keep fighting than ever. For Leia.

Godspeed, Rebels!

#star wars spoilers #tros spoilers #star wars #the rise of skywalker #ben solo #rey #kylo ren #palpatine #alright now I go to sleep

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junkobears · 6 years

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Here Lies Dreaded V3 Discourse

So I have seemed to cause a huge kerfuffle in the hardcore Ouma conspiracy theorists standom, and a banal (if condescending, but seeing the response to it honestly justifies it more than anything now. “Don’t dish it out if you can’t take it”, you better believe I can take it and will now PROPERLY dish it out right back at you) comment about one of Tsumugi’s anime references has led to someone launching a hilariously personal attack at me for Daring To Disagree With A Theory That Was Posted On A Public Website. Someone who I wasn’t even initially responding too, at that. And has now blocked me before even allowing me to respond and clarify my original comments. Don’t want to deal with the consequences of being a repugnant, rude person I guess? Shock and surprise for Tumblr.

The link to the post is here, but I’ve taken the liberty to screenshot it just in case it gets deleted later, in hope that maybe there’ll be some reflection on this person’s part that this really is not an acceptable way to respond to people who have a dissenting opinion? Anyways, I will be responding to the personal attack post and that will be the last time I interact with this group, because clearly it’s not worth it to actually have a discussion about our respective ending theories. I ain’t got time beyond this for tedious insecure fucks these days.

Anyways, my response is under the cut to save my poor followers’ dashes. Sorry to drag drama onto my blog but I can’t really let this slide. I’m also tagging @jacks-plays-drv3 just because I assume the twin comes with the other with these two, and I want my response to have been seen.

Screenshot In This Link - This post is long enough without the image taking up more space, haha.

Let’s start with this mess, shall we? And I will go into painstaking detail.

Paragraph 1: So this already starts off with a whole lot of needless aggression and projection. So I’m not even going to attempt to be nice back. But: maybe I haven’t proven anything because I literally had not typed up a response to clarify my original comments @ Jacks yet before the rabid attack dog was unleashed? Like, there was literally no attempt from you to have a discussion that was a genuine offer from me, I was not out to get you actually. I also honestly just laughed at being called shallow, JUST LIKE THAT HORRIBLE CHARACTER TSUMUGI SHIROGANE right off the bat as well. That’s a compliment really, honey. Weirdly I don’t share the same opinions as you do. Tsumugi is my fave and unlike you I actually think about and HAVE analyzed/discussed her character in detail previously, which I would’ve been happy to share had you not immediately went into Blind Raging Idiot Mode. Guess we can’t have it all, huh?

As for needing proof that she makes the Flashback Lights... nevermind the CG that literally shows her making them during Chapter 6, but do you have proof that Monokuma is the person who makes the Lights instead of just placing them for the students? I doubt it, somehow. Cuz a lot of your theories don’t actually have any concrete proof. Quelle surprise. Probably why anyone not immediately on board with your headcanon gets you so goddamn angry, huh? Cuz it’s completely baseless and you know it at heart.

As for the Ouma comments, actually I have read the assorted creator comments regarding his character even if you like to believe I’m a slobbering moron who turned my brain off as soon as I finished V3, so yes I already know that his name was chosen to sound mastermind-like. Maybe this was to emphasize and make his fake mastermind reveal appear more legit on first read? JUST A THOUGHT, SWEETIE. You know the entire fucking point of Chapter 5? You’re so slavishly devoted to your theory that you actually are incapable of reading the basic fucking text from the actual game, but again. Not a surprise. Considering what I’ve read from your blog (really, who are you again? I only knew Jacks’ blog from before all this, so you taking such a personal offense at my comments is honestly hilarious but baffling at the same time. It ain’t all about you, babe.)

As for the lab door, here’s an simpler explanation (Occam’s Razor, look it up): The star sign constellation pattern was there as a hint for the player to connect Ouma’s messages from his dorm room to the vault in Amami’s lab once its opened and you can see the star signs in there. Or perhaps it was designed like that by TDR to make the students make that connection as well in the original script and think that Ouma was the mastermind cuz of the connection to Amami’s lab? Literally, there are a lot of possibilities, cuz it’s a NOTHING DETAIL THAT DOESN’T ACTUALLY MATTER IN THE BIG PICTURE. Considering Kodaka’s track record with writing these games I don’t actually believe it’s anything major, personally. He doesn’t really strike me as the type to hide this completely separate story underneath the actual story we got, and with such vague nothing “”””””””””””clues””””””””””””. You and Jacks do yourselves (well you already do cuz you love to jack yourselves off with how CLEVER AND BETTER you are than the rest of us plebs), sure, in believing otherwise (You have way too much faith in him as a writer. Or you’re desperately trying to pretend V3 wasn’t poorly written cuz you don’t like the Ch. 6 twist) but also realize that its nothing more than extrapolation on your part that it actually means anything beyond the.... SHALLOW (horror scream) connection given in-game.

And really, who the fuck cares if it doesn’t match the title of ‘Supreme Leader’? It’s already a ridiculous talent as it stands already. The entire point of his character is that everything about him, his motives and his talent is contradictory and weird. That’s why I like him, actually. He isn’t an abused martyr who never lies like you goons believe and he also isn’t the evil monstrous chessmaster some of the fandom thinks. It’s Complex Motives™ .

Anyways moving on. Pointing out an anime reference =/= DISREGARDING PEOPLE’S ANALYSIS. Pointing out that most of the plot leads up to and supports the fiction twist =/= uncritically agreeing with everything Tsumugi says. Actually, after examining the game’s story for myself I came to the conclusion that all the clues in it really only support her version of the story, really. There are a few things I think she lied about, but it is not CONCLUSIVELY proven she lied in my opinion and so I don’t really give a fucking toss until new canon comes out and reveals more of the V3 story. Oumatwin don’t real, gurl. If there was actually anything in-game beyond one obvious joke line in the NON-CANON!!!!!!! bonus mode supporting that he existed, maybe I’d respect your theory more. Even though you don’t deserve respect after your little tantrum.

Paragraph 2: Jesus I already am investing way too much time into this response at people who don’t actually deserve it, oh well. But laughing hard at the attempt to try and act as if you weren’t being a snobby asshole with your comments. Again, HUGE AMOUNTS OF PROJECTION at me about things I literally have never done and said. I have never interacted with you or Jacks prior to my initial comment. No fucking clue why you brought up the SaiOuma shit, cuz I don’t even LIKE Saihara as a character and don’t like that fujobait ship in the slightest? But I guess it’s easier to assume that all your critics are the exact same fucking person with the same opinions, so you can feel more persecuted, huh? You literally did not even wait for me to respond or check my blog that would’ve easily disproven these dumb-as-fuck assumptions. And get off the fucking high horse (pun completely intended), you lot are not the only people in this fandom who are capable of critical thought. How completely self-obsessed can you be?

For someone who claims to have a lot of critical thinking skills compared to this nasty fandom, you really are terrible at parsing other people’s words. You fucking know when I said “group of anime fans” that I was referring to Team Danganronpa, the organization literally mentioned in game as running the game. The group Tsumugi is part of. She literally has a company badge FFS. THEY ARE ANIME FANS. THEY ALL STARTED KILLING GAMES CUZ THEY ALL LOVE THIS SHITTY SERIES. I can’t believe this had to be explained. And the rest of this paragraph word salad is the most pedantic argument. It’s really not hard to believe an organization in this series would have access to all this tech. And yes, it’s a popular TV show in-universe, of course it’ll have funding. And the whole damn point of the ending is that the V3 world is consuming fiction the wrong way by having real-life killing games, missing the entire point of the DR series and fiction in general? What’s your actual point?

Paragraph 3: Again more assumptions, I wasn’t ‘crying’ about being called gullible. I was just pointing it out as part of your extremely unnecessary smug dismissal of my post. That you really haven’t disproved at all, btw. Honestly the childish response you both had to me just makes me laugh out of pity more than anything. And if I was really upset I wouldn’t have offered to have a discussion with you or even continued to reply after Jacks initial (vague) post about what I said. So don’t put words in my mouth. And yes my analysis was not completed in my initial comments. It’s Tumblr fucking replies, I can’t fit the entire fucking dissertation of Tsumugi opinions in there for you to jeer at in there. Again, I offered to share my opinions and got this as a response, so lol. You are your own worst enemy when it comes to trying to get people to take you and your theories seriously.

Paragraph 4: Especially since you immediately jump to PULLING THINGS OUT OF YOUR ASS (seriously, fucking snorted at this part. I want this whole diatribe on my fucking gravestone. It’s by far the most hilariously petty thing ever said about me on this site.) instead of letting me explain my position. If you just want to be in the creepy cult Oumatwin echo chamber you should’ve just said and blocked me ASAP instead of word salading vague bullshit justifications for why actually people who disagree with you are just stupid crybabies who can never hope to understand your genius. Again, my initial comments didn’t whine about not being taken seriously at all, I was pointing out the hypocrisy/rudeness is all. And again, get off the high horse about critical thinking. I have thought about Tsumugi’s character and how she relates to the over-arching plot and how truthful it is, and the overall ‘mystery’ of V3 (spoiler: there is none. it was all solved by chapter 6). I have thought about this game. In fact I dedicate too much time to critical analysis of this series that doesn’t actually deserve it cuz lately I find Kodaka to be a hack writer. Your assumptions are flat-out wrong, dear. And AGAIN. I WOULD’VE. SHARED AND DISCUSSED IN MORE DETAIL HAD I BEEN GIVEN THE OPPORTUNITY. But rude fucks gonna vomit shit out of their mouth cuz they have literally no self-control and have meltdowns at the slightest difference of opinion, I guess.

Your extreme hatred for Tsumugi as a character truly shines through. Clearly no thought has been put into her from your end, even though you and Jacks rage about people not taking Ouma seriously as a character. Double standards as always with fujos. Nothing I’m not used too, she is incredibly unpopular in this fandom. And everyone is entitled to their own opinions. So I’m not even mad at that. I have never said otherwise. Even you and Jacks are valid in having your own theories and thoughts. The ending of V3 is designed entirely so everyone can analyze the game for themselves and draw their own conclusions about the story and themes. That’s the whole point. Even though I personally dislike that as a writing decision on Kodaka’s part because I would prefer the story to be conclusively ended and the epilogue is a giant turd that misses the entire point of Chapter 6 and enables shit (anal pun intended, dumbass) like this to start spreading as “Analysis”. But hey, to each their own.

However I will not be interacting with either of you again after this post though, even though I was willing to discuss beforehand, because you both have shown yourselves to be incredibly vile with the way you approach other people in this fandom, and especially those who don’t share your conspiracy theory. Despite the absolutely ironic comments I’ve seen from Oumanous in their later, also terrible posts about how you need to understand your opponent before engaging, which they literally failed entirely to do before engaging the firing squad at me and other commentators who responded. So much for the sanctity of discussion, huh? Enjoy your circlejerk. Everyone else who follows me in this fandom though? Please consider blocking these two if you are also a sane human being who is capable of polite discussion/disagreements. They are not worth your time otherwise. They were really not worth my time writing this post, but I felt I had to say something.

In conclusion: Out with the both of you.

#fandom drama #V3 spoilers #long post #i cant believe i have ended up in dr fandom discourse #i have sunk so low lmfao #allowed to reblog this post also I dont mind #unless you are the two chucklefucks this post is about #out. with you.#but I will not be afraid to stand up for myself when I get shit like this #anyways its done bridge burned

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lethesomething · 6 years

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Lipstick

Hello yes, I’ve been obsessing over Mystic Messenger, so have a thing.

So I basically fell in love with 707 long before I ever got to his route (which I'm currently trying to finish), so you can consider this an… innocent au? I guess? Iono man, I just wanted to write about pretty boys wearing lipstick.

707 takes his friend out on a 'girls night' to cheer her up. Ultra-fast-burn friends-to-lovers, in an extremely fluffy way.

"Hmmm, Dollhouse pink?" "No." He pouts and goes back to rifling through your make-up bag. "Oooh, what about this one? Starlet red?" Seven holds out a very bright red lipstick, fluttering his eyelashes at you. "Let me borrow this one." "No." "Aw come on, only for one night. I promise to give it back." "Seven. No." "Seven yes!" "It'll clash with your hair," you sigh. "You wanna look like a clown? Gimme the bag." You hold out your hand and he plops it in. "You want something darker, like a nice burgundy or a sierra or something." Frowning, you search for something that will at least match his general complexion. "What about this?," you say, holding out a very respectable looking lipstick that you, admittedly, have never used before. "Chocolate cherry?" He flops over on your bed. "That sounds boring."

Rolling your eyes, you go back to the search. When did you pick up quite this much make-up anyway? Finally, you see the tube you've been looking for. It's shiny, a silver sheen with swirly black writing on it, straddling the line between classy and tacky in a way that reminds you of Jessica Rabbit. "Here. Femme fatale." His eyes light up at the name alone. "Try it." He takes the tube from your hand and sprints to the mirror, before applying it with a critical look. "What do you think?" He turns around and it's… damn near perfect. The colour complements his skin. It makes his eyes pop, bringing out flecks of gold underneath his glasses. "Well shit," you say. "I'm having second thoughts about this." "Why?" he droops and comes closer, fluttering his eyelashes at you.

"At this rate I'm basically gonna be a friggin wingwoman to the hottest chick at the party, " you sigh. "That looks amazing on you." "Yay!" his face creases into a smile and he jumps up. "Oh but nothing could match the radiance of thy beauty," he holds his hand to his heart and twirls through the room. "Whut." "Did I sound like Zen just now?" "Ya." He winks. "There's nothing Captain 707 can't do. Now, let me show you my outfit." You sigh and shake your head, smiling, as he runs into the bathroom with his backpack.

He wanted to take you on a girl's night out. For research, he said. It'll be fun, he said. Two friends going out and partying, he said. And you, silly as you are, are completely incapable of refusing him anything. So here you sit in your desk chair, leaning your chin on your hand, as your best friend parades through the room in a snazzy looking dress that makes you green with envy. "Where the hell did you get the boobs?" you ask. "That's a secret," he smiles. "They're good though, aren't they? Very squishy, supposed to be pretty realistic. Wanna feel?" "No?" "Are you sure?" "Ok, lemme feel," you sigh, and he shoves his chest at you. They're surprisingly nice. The boobs, that is. B-cup, about the right size for his posture. You're impressed by the amount of restraint it must have taken him to not go for double d's or something.

You give them a squeeze. Squishy. "It's not the first time you're doing something like this, is it?" you mutter. "I sometimes dress up for work. But this time is different." "How so?" "This time it's for fun, and you'll be there!" "Well, lemme tell you, if your legs look better in heels than mine, I'm breaking up with you as a friend." "Boo." He flops back onto the bed and pulls an eye shadow palette out of his bag. "Come help me with this? I wanna do a smoky eye."

The night goes about as well as you'd expect. Seven's BFF persona is loud, flirty, outgoing and at times plain weird. But because 'Lucille' looks pretty damn hot, this doesn't seem to faze any of the guys currently trying to hit her up. You reach for the mace in your purse at least three times during the course of the evening, but you should never underestimate a genius with some Intelligence training. Every time you think a situation is about to escalate into a full on bar fight, Lucille flirts her way out of it, just to come back to your table with some pink fruity drink. "You want this?" he asks, "They keep giving me this stuff." "Buying drinks is a basic way of flirting, Lucille," you say with a lopsided smile. "Well is it bad form to accept it and then walk away?" "No." "Is it bad form to give it to your bestest friend?" "Probably," you say, grabbing the drink and pulling out the umbrella. "But I'm not about to let a perfectly good Cosmopolitan go to waste." "Well, drink up, because there's a spot on that dance floor with our name on it." You have just enough time to gulp about half of the overly sweet vodka down your throat, before you're dragged away, into the thick press of bodies moving rhythmically to something resembling a beat.

"So this is what heaven feels like." Seven lies back on your bed, having just kicked off his heels. He wiggles his toes with a soft sigh. "Yup. I'm impressed you kept them on that long. This is what makes women live for the end of the day. Taking off the heels and the bra." He cups his breasts. "I dunno, these are pretty comfy." "They're fake, Seven." "True, that." You ponder for a moment. "Would you.…like them to not be?" you say carefully. "Nope, I'm good." He sits up and starts pulling off the dress. You look away, face heating up. "So what was all that about, anyway?" you ask the Rocky Horror poster on your wall. "Mmm? Like I said, I wanted to go out with you." His voice sounds muffled as he's wriggling out of his clothes. "I wanted to have fun and you always seem a little uncomfortable when we're out in public together. Like you're afraid of people thinking we're a couple or something." "So your answer was crossdressing!?" you gawp. "I like this outfit! Gurl don't even pretend like I don't rock this look," he says, and you can hear the amusement in his voice. "Also it worked. You giggled like most of the evening." "That's cause I was tipsy from all the cosmo's people kept buying you!" "But you had fun, didn't you?" His voice is suddenly very close and you turn to see him smile gently, smudged mascara and all. You swallow, blinking fast, and then he's gone again, bending over a chair to pick up his regular clothes. "You've been looking down lately, so god Seven descended to earth to take you dancing and lift your spirits," he says. "And get me tipsy," you grin. "Don't forget that part because I will have regrets in the morning." "Ya you really should take care of yourself,"he mutters as he enters the bathroom. "I am NOT taking diet advice from a man who lives on chips and soda," you start huffing, but he returns with a large glass of water. "Hydrate Get!" He plops it on the desk next to you. "I'm going to steal your shower for a bit, if you don't mind." "Mm, go ahead." "Ahhh, you're so nice! Better be careful, or captain 707 will steal not only your make-up and your bathroom, but also your heart." You lean back with a deep sigh and sip water, listening to your friend sing a waterlogged rendition of a Whitney Houston song.

"Hey, does this stuff even come off?" He comes back in a cloud of steam and you fall over, giggling. His hair is wet, skin damp and warm from the shower, and his face looks like a raccoon's. The mascara has been rubbed everywhere but it's still clinging to his eyes like the brave little soldier it is. His lips are Femme Fatale red, only now it's not just his lips, but most of his mouth. "It's waterproof," you say, gasping for breath. "Hold on. Sit here." You pat the bed next to you and get up to grab your make-up remover. "You need special remover to get rid of it," you say, prepping a cotton pad. "Close your eyes." He sits straight, twitches only slightly when you gently wipe the cotton over his eyes. "There's no need for you to be that careful you know," he says. "God Seven is not a delicate flower." You snort. "Well no. You look like a friggin clown right now." He makes a face and reached out to jab you in the ribs. "Ow! Hey! If I'm not careful I'll poke your eye out!" "Ok, ok. I'll be good." He grins widely, sitting back to let you finish. You concentrate on slowly cleaning off his lashes and your own skin could only wish that you'd ever take that much care for it.

"Alright. There," you say after a while. He opens his eyes, gold rising to meet you like a dawning sun. "Better?" he asks. You remember to breathe. "Yup! Just your lips now." "You know this lipstick says it's 'extra enriching'. Does that mean I have super soft lips now?" "Probably," you say, looking away to prep another cotton pad. "Hold still?" He sits obediently, golden eyes watching you intently as you wipe the lipstick from his mouth.

"Almost done," you murmur as you pull away to find a clean pad. "Hey," he says suddenly, voice almost a murmur. "Can I kiss you?" You blink at him, mild shock on probably written al over your face. "While they're still soft," he adds with a smirk. "Seven, your lips won't suddenly go …" you start saying, but your voice trails off as your eyes travel down. His lips are swollen slightly, parted just a little, tinted in the last vestiges of red. There's a gleam in his eye that is somewhere between mischief and desire and you, silly little you, can never resist or deny him. "Ok?" you croak, and he leans in, lips pressing against yours in a move that is both too gentle and too brief to give you any consolation.

You take a deep breath and look up into twinkling gold eyes. "What was that for?" "I've been wanting to do that for a while," he shrugs. "And just then, it looked like you also wanted it. So captain 707 swooped in and took his chance!" "So that's how it is." You shake your head, chuckling. "Too much?" he asks. "You've always been a handful, Seven," you sigh. "But I do know how you can make it up to me." "Oh?" "You're going to have to do that again." "What, the kissing or the dre-" Your hand reaches behind his neck, tugging him closer. "Ohhh. Ok."

#luciel choi #mm 707 #mystic messenger #lethey writes #fluff #friends to lovers #like ultra fast burn #crossdressing #cute things #i am terrible at endings

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jadinerhine · 6 years

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Hey hey hey, Sapphire fans, have another dumb hot take on our gurl, this time on a topic I’ve had thoughts on for the past few years. Because it’s potentially a hot button one, all I ask is that you read the entire thing before diving into a civic discussion about it! What am I saying, it’s tumblr, there is no such thing as critical thinking and civility anymore thanks to this hellsite.

Disclaimer #1: THIS IS MY OPINION FIRST AND FOREMOST. A headcanon, as the hip kids say around the internet. It’s not Word of God or anything like that. It’s an opinion formed by lots of reading and analyzing. If you have a different headcanon, that’s coolio too! ^_^

Disclaimer #2: this is based strictly on Tezuka manga canon. I’ve seen the PK anime on-and-off and I don’t trust my memory on elements from it.

Disclaimer #3: I don’t have my manga copy with me, so no scans of panels and such : ( But I will make sure to explain the scenes I reference, as well as include links to definitions of things.

Disclaimer #4: I researched and read about this often, but I’m pretty sure I will make mistakes. As respectful as I’ve tried to be, I am sure people out there are smarter than me about things pertaining to this topic. Let me know constructively if I messed up.

Unpopular opinion that’s actually never been mentioned so maybe it’s not really unpopular?: I believe Sapphire is intersex, more gender-fluid rather than just a minimally tomboyish girl or female-to-male transgender.

No, this has nothing to do with transphobia or any other -phobia. It’s primarily based on how Tezuka, even with the problematic views spoused in the manga, accidentally gave us aspects of Sapphire’s self that for me, lend credence to her being intersex. (Yes I know, Takarazuka influenced Tezuka and PK too, but again, only paying attention to manga lore.) I’m going to list two main facts, and within each one, state why I think the fact lends credence to my opinion. I’ll try my best to write my reasons for intersex Sapphire as best as I can.

Since this turned out to be such a long post -- longer than I thought, yipes! -- I’ll be putting it under a cut. It will be tagged “long post” too for those who have that tag or are on mobile and can finally have blacklisted tags work. Hurrah!

FACT 1: Sapphire was forced to become a boy for the sake of the throne.

Sapphire was born a girl, and as we all know, her family didn’t want to give up the throne to Silverland if it meant giving it over to Duke Duralumin, who’s basically a dictator waiting in the wings for the chance to out Sapphire as a girl. Why? Girls can’t rule in Silverland.

Solution? Keep it in the family! Make your daughter a son instead and declare him prince!

Because that will do wonders for possible gender and/or body dysphoria!

Gender dysphoria, as defined here (emphasis mine):

[GID] involves a conflict between a person's physical or assigned gender and the gender with which he/she/they identify. People with gender dysphoria may be very uncomfortable with the gender they were assigned, sometimes described as being uncomfortable with their body (particularly developments during puberty) or being uncomfortable with the expected roles of their assigned gender.

[...]

Gender dysphoria is not the same as gender nonconformity, which refers to behaviors not matching the gender norms or stereotypes of the gender assigned at birth. Examples of gender nonconformity (also referred to as gender expansiveness or gender creativity) include girls behaving and dressing in ways more socially expected of boys or occasional cross-dressing in adult men.

Body dysphoria, as defined here (emphasis mine):

BDD is a body-image disorder characterized by persistent and intrusive preoccupations with an imagined or slight defect in one's appearance.

People with BDD can dislike any part of their body, although they often find fault with their hair, skin, nose, chest, or stomach. In reality, a perceived defect may be only a slight imperfection or nonexistent. But for someone with BDD, the flaw is significant and prominent, often causing severe emotional distress and difficulties in daily functioning.

and here:

When you have body dysmorphic disorder, you intensely obsess over your appearance and body image, repeatedly checking the mirror, grooming or seeking reassurance, sometimes for many hours each day. Your perceived flaw and the repetitive behaviors cause you significant distress, and impact your ability to function in your daily life.

Personally, I think Sapphire suffers/would suffer more from body dysphoria, as she’s an adaptable type of person and would force herself to accept her gendered lot for the moment, as she’s done clearly. She’s uncomfortable with most expected roles of being a boy, as stated above, but she knows why she has to do it. She has to keep the kingdom away from Duralumin, protect her people. She does seem to not mind some of the princely activities she does either – she enjoys sword fighting and fencing, for one! (Was it me, or was she really into the book How to Court Women that she was reading near the beginning of the manga?)

Sidenote: When we see Friebe and Sapphire fighting together, Friebe makes the comment of why Sapphire is a girl still "fighting like a boy” alongside Friebe – but Friebe is a girl and fighting “like a boy” too! Ain’t that odd…

Sapphire’s about 15, which means she’s likely going through puberty – if she liked doing (usually) male activities, able to convince her kingdom either way of her appearance, then how would she deal with either: her body might betray her by naturally evolving into the female body she was born as, or that her body might still remain the same, due to an imbalance of testosterone/estrogen, among other factors? With the latter, she would struggle internally but be able to be king (unless her mom’s drugged and outs her due to the drug, like in the manga) but with the former? You can imagine that struggle with her future, can you?

And as much as I hate to link to anything related to the Jezebel site, this article makes a good point about not conflating the two. A passage or two (emphasis mine):

Those who suffer from body dysmorphia have a disconnection between the reality they are perceiving and how that perception is recognised in their brains. They look in an ordinary mirror, but for them, the result is something like we might imagine a funhouse mirror to look. There is an inability to recognise the body for what it is. Features seem distorted, and flaws (real or imagined) are perceived as much much worse than they are (if they even exist, and if they're even flaws in the first place)

[…]

So how is this disconnect different from the disconnect between the assignment of gender at birth and the gender identity of a person with gender dysphoria? It is substantially different in that one of the strongest aspects of gender dysphoria for many (but not all!) individuals who have those feelings is an acute awareness of what their physical features actually are and why those features do not match up with the gender presentation expected of the gender with which they identify.

and this is why hecate and captain blood are good for sapphire, and not franz charming, sorry I don’t make the rules, those two respected or ended up respecting her more, and besides her mom, would have made her feel more comfortable if this were an alternate timeline where they both diDN’T DIE

I digress. We see Sapphire constantly struggling with her identity. She wanted desperately to be a “girly girl,” so said when she wanted to go to the ball but couldn’t because she still needed to be the prince. Yet later, after Sapphire and her mother are prisoners in a tower due to Duralumin and Sapphire’s identity revealed, and after Sapphire escapes the dungeon with Tink and rides away, Tink asks Sapphire about her perception of herself. What is Sapphire, to Sapphire? That it’s Tink, the one tasked to take Sapphire’s boy heart from her, who asks this has always been fascinating – much more so when coupled with the times he tries to protect her and gives in to her having two hearts just so long as she’s able to fend for herself and survive past swordfights.

Anyway, Sapphire’s answer can be chalked up to “I’m not sure yet” and “I don’t mind myself as I am right now.” It’s a plot line that gets lost and muddied and retrofitted to fit the “proper wife model for a fifties audience” Sapphire ends up in, but it was still said. It counts!

Now, this is the part where I admit confusion when someone headcanons Sapphire to be transgender. I mean, I get it, I totally do – again, don’t mind that headcanon but in my head, I don’t think being forced to be a gender in the first place works like that, either?

Sapphire, in manga canon, initially wants to be a girl just because she wants to experience life as the person she was born as. Sometimes she is comfortable being a boy, can shift quickly to her princely mindset if she’s suddenly caught indulging in feminine “vices” – and those are all okay! But she accustomed to that fast when she realized she will never be allowed to be a girl naturally, or as a girl with male tendencies. if you were someone who were forced to conform to a rigid gendered lifestyle and activities, and were told to never express your other self, would you really want to stay as the same gender after you’re “free”?

Having said that, it’s not like intersex people can’t be transgender. (More on that below.) And I did mention that I think she’s genderfluid, definition here --

Genderfluid: Someone whose gender identity or expression shifts between man/masculine and woman/feminine or falls somewhere along this spectrum.

– and it’s because of that, because despite her own anger at this forced lifestyle, she seems to realize how much she does enjoy being good at male activities, how much she enjoys expressing her masculinity (for lack of a better word.) Equally as much as being a girl does. I feel as if, if she were in modern times, she would be comfortable being a boy one day, and a girl the next. She wouldn’t mind creating bouquets as she does in her first appearance, and wouldn’t mind strengthening her body with (usually) male-oriented exercises.

After all, according to the manga lore established by Tezuka, Sapphire’s two hearts allow her to live in two worlds at once!

FACT 2 : TWO HEARTS BEAT AS ONE

Having God decide your assigned gender by hearts was a viable candidate for suspension of disbelief enough, having a person born with two hearts sends Heaven into panic and despair! And the rest of us raise our eyebrows in collective “huh”?

The manga makes it sound as if Sapphire is the first, and only, person born with two hearts. It’s either/or for the hearts, not and/and. You’re a boy who gets to fight, you’re a girl who gets to faint, nothing more.

Therefore, a boy heart + a girl heart = a girl + a boy = Sapphire. We’ve seen it happen, when Tink takes Sapphire’s boy heart out of her in the middle of a fight, and Sapphire suddenly forgets how to fight and is all a-flutter at the idea of -gasp!- violence! We’ve seen Sapphire’s body straight-up CHANGE from a female body to a male body when she loses her girl heart near the end, when Franz sets out to find her.

The fifties, fifties Japan, fifties Japan with a manga written by a man whose starting points were Cinderella, Disney movies and the all-female Takarazuka revue, which divides its actor into female or male roles. What a delicious soup of contradictions. What a delicious soup of weirdness.

Personally, I like to believe the two hearts concept can be translated into two souls. It’s a better version to grasp than actual literal hearts that can be taken out of your body and suddenly, bam, your gender and sex change automatically. (Seriously, what?) Two souls fits the pseudo-Christian-Pagan worldbuilding aspects of the manga, and it makes sense that at times, Sapphire feels empty without one of her hearts. Granted, there was the part where Sapphire fights without her boy heart and realizes she can still fight with her girl heart – which is a great snippet of character development, were it not for…the other pieces of dialogue…and Franz…who’s quite content with Sapphire “finally becoming a woman” by story’s end.

listen, princes knight!franz is the only franz I actively dislike, I like him everywhere else, pk!franz doesn’t learn anything from his mistakes, man

Two souls also helps understand a situation like Hecate, whose mother desperately wants Sapphire’s girl heart, so Hecate can be a proper girl. Hecate, the true tomboy of the series, lacks a physical heart and yet interacts and develops like any normal girl out there. But she has a soul, she does! One that loves mischief and silly pranks, who lives and breathes just like Sapphire does. It’s just not “perfect”/traditional in her mother’s eyes.

FACT 3: Wait, this isn’t a fact, back up, you said Sapphire with a boy heart changed her body entirely????

Okay, now this is where I get to, uh, cement? state my case better? for intersex Sapphire. Man, I hope so.

Let’s say (using Tezuka’s own questionable plot devices/ignoring the literalness of the heart concept a bit) that the two souls co-exist alongside having either a girl or boy heart. The soul functions with who you are, the heart functions with your body. Similar to gender and sex, I think, if you want/need a real world simile to understand it better.

Sapphire states herself to Franz as a boy, all boy, when Franz finds him after Venus (I believe it was in the Venus arc) has taken away Sapphire’s girl heart in order for Franz to run away to Venus. Y’all can guess why obviously. Sapphire is boisterous, proud, every stereotype you can think of, and stands proudly as a boy. Sapphire also is insulted when Franz insinuates otherwise, and makes a distinct notion that everything about him is boy.

and franz is distraught because oh my god sapphire’s not a girl anymore, but also whatever man, you were awful to sapphire when you found out she was a prince and didn’t even listen to her reasons why, captain blood had to tell you, you schmuck

But of course, this is short-lived. Sapphire does get her girl heart back, only to lose her boy heart later. Presumably, if the scene above applies, then that means that Sapphire is all girl.

As stated above, a boy heart + a girl heart = a girl + a boy. If we use the soul concept, then Sapphire is a boy + a girl in both soul and body. More so body, really, because she’s the same person with both hearts, and more or less the same person with only a girl heart. (I think the difference in personality with only a boy heart was for plot reasons...she was boisterous and proud in the anime and manga with both hearts at times.)

In the real world, there are different conditions for intersex people. I have a not-solidified idea of which one applies to Sapphire, but the definition of intersex (emphasis mine):

“Intersex” is a general term used for a variety of conditions in which a person is born with a reproductive or sexual anatomy that doesn’t seem to fit the typical definitions of female or male. For example, a person might be born appearing to be female on the outside, but having mostly male-typical anatomy on the inside. Or a person may be born with genitals that seem to be in-between the usual male and female types—for example, a girl may be born with a noticeably large clitoris, or lacking a vaginal opening, or a boy may be born with a notably small penis, or with a scrotum that is divided so that it has formed more like labia. Or a person may be born with mosaic genetics, so that some of her cells have XX chromosomes and some of them have XY.

[...]

In the same way, nature presents us with sex anatomy spectrums. Breasts, penises, clitorises, scrotums, labia, gonads—all of these vary in size and shape and morphology. So-called “sex” chromosomes can vary quite a bit, too. But in human cultures, sex categories get simplified into male, female, and sometimes intersex, in order to simplify social interactions, express what we know and feel, and maintain order.

So nature doesn’t decide where the category of “male” ends and the category of “intersex” begins, or where the category of “intersex” ends and the category of “female” begins. Humans decide. Humans (today, typically doctors) decide how small a penis has to be, or how unusual a combination of parts has to be, before it counts as intersex. Humans decide whether a person with XXY chromosomes or XY chromosomes and androgen insensitivity will count as intersex.

and a little bit from here:

In cases of intersex, doctors and parents need to recognize, however, that gender assignment of infants with intersex conditions as boy or girl, as with assignment of any infant, is preliminary. Any child—intersex or not—may decide later in life that she or he was given the wrong gender assignment; but children with certain intersex conditions have significantly higher rates of gender transition than the general population, with or without treatment.

Before I continue, let me tackle ‘gender transition’ -- as I said above, it’s not that intersex people can’t be transgender people. Some intersex people do change their gender from the ones they were forced to be, much like Sapphire was forced to be -- and yes, in this case, it means that Sapphire can be both intersex and transgender. But sometimes it does feel as if people are in love with the idea of a princely Sapphire so much, that they forget that she was forced to be a prince/a boy in the first place, and that she is content with being a girl. Or both. (Remember her initial answer to Tink’s question!) In the words of a wise little girl once: ¿porqué no los dos (headcanons)?

There are other intersex people who are equally happy with the gender they were assigned to, just not exactly with their bodies, thanks to parents being convinced by doctors that butchering their newborn baby’s body is for the best. (Seriously, there are horror stories.) And much like gender dysphoria and body dysphoria are conflated, so are intersex and transgender people (emphasis and italics mine):

People who have intersex conditions have anatomy that is not considered typically male or female. Most people with intersex conditions come to medical attention because doctors or parents notice something unusual about their bodies. In contrast, people who are transgendered have an internal experience of gender identity that is different from most people.

Many people confuse transgender and transsexual people with people with intersex conditions because they see two groups of people who would like to choose their own gender identity and sometimes those choices require hormonal treatments and/or surgery. These are similarities. It’s also true, albeit rare, that some people who have intersex conditions also decide to change genders at some point in their life, so some people with intersex conditions might also identify themselves as transgender or transsexual.

In spite of these similarities, these two groups should not be and cannot be thought of as one. The truth is that the vast majority of people with intersex conditions identify as male or female rather than transgender or transsexual. Thus, where all people who identify as transgender or transsexual experience problems with their gender identity, only a small portion of intersex people experience these problems.

Tink gave Sapphire a boy heart in Heaven, because he wanted to help/be funny, I guess? God decided she deserved a girl heart. If you want to ignore the religious details, then nature/science gave Sapphire the body she has. (Sapphire’s mom also had a difficult birth, so that...could also apply...?) As I said too, Sapphire is/does become/should have been comfortable with her body and soul in the manga, before Tezuka and society rear their head and change everything up again for her. She identifies as male some days, she identifies as female some days. And because she has two hearts, it means her body is reflecting male and female biology/anatomy.

BUT WAIT, you say. What about Twin Knights??!

Oh, you mean the fantastic sequel that eschew the hearts plot, still maintains some fifties ideals despite playing more with gender (and sexuality, I wager but also I don’t want to stretch that with a story like Twin Knights) and concentrates on Sapphire’s sweet, sweet twins who she loves and adores?

WELL.

I can’t find much information on intersex people being able to get pregnant from medical/science places, per se. I’ve heard that it’s both possible and not possible, depending on which condition you have. This link, this one, this one and this one have more information on pregnancy and intersex people, even if one of them is sighs Cosmopolitan and two are from Quora. Cosmopolitan does have stories, as do the Everyone is Gay one, and if there’s one thing I believe in, it’s hearing/listening to stories directly from sources.

So you know, Sapphire can have children still, depending. And even if we ignore the sequel, and it turns out she can’t? ADOPT SHE CAN ADOPT, SHE LOVES KIDS. Plus, and as a final ending note to this because wow this got long, I’ll leave you with this:

A final thought: we’re all raised in a world where we’re told that, after puberty, our bodies “should” be able to do all these things. When you learn that your body, in fact, doesn’t do all these things as an intersex person, it’s easy to think that this means there’s something wrong with you, since you “can’t” do these things. I’m here to tell you that just because you don’t get a period and won’t give birth, that doesn’t mean that your body isn’t able to do something it’s “supposed to do” – YOUR BODY IS DOING WHAT IT’S SUPPOSED TO BE DOING ALL ALONG. Or that somehow you’re less of a girl or a woman because your body doesn’t do these things. Not all of us are comfortable or okay with this knowledge – especially at first – and I am not trying to minimize your feelings about this. At some point, though, after you’ve processed all this more, I’d encourage you to reframe thinking about what your body “can’t do” (= is “supposed to do”) to what your body doesn’t do. <3

and this, which is from the link in the quote:

As a fetus, I wasn’t going to turn into a girl. I wasn’t going to turn into a boy. I was going to turn into me, the whole time. To me, statements with the how-are-you-lucky-enough-to-have-gotten-away-with-this sentiment are akin to me being told by a bird that I’m so lucky I don’t have to fly around for long periods of time during migrations, or being told by a trout I’m so lucky I don’t have to try swimming upstream because it’s difficult. What the hell are you critters talking about?! I’m not a bird and never was, and never will be. I’m not a trout and never was, and never will be. I didn’t get away with not being able to do those things – I was never supposed to be able to do them in the first place, because I’m ME. Saying that I’m lucky not to do something it’s assumed my body “should be” able to do erases the realness of my intersex body. My body is only supposed to do what it was always supposed to do, and that includes not menstruating or being reproductive or bearing children. MY BODY IS ALREADY DOING WHAT IT WAS SUPPOSED TO DO ALL ALONG. The problem is in the perception that intersex bodies are supposed to be like or do things that male- and female-defined bodies do. But not all male bodies and not all female bodies do the same things anyway. Why would we assume that intersex bodies will all work the same way as all male and/or female bodies? Would we assume that all intersex bodies, with our many variations, work the same way as all other intersex bodies, too? These perceptions need to change.

“I was going to turn into me, the whole time.” I can’t think of something that describes Sapphire better.

#Princess Knight #Ribon no Kishi #Ribbon no Kishi #Osamu Tezuka #meta #long post #I stopped myself twice from posting this and then just decided to go for the goal #go for the gusto of having a bunch of people in your asks screaming at your mistakes #but #this is a meta I'm passionate about and am always wanting to learn more #and I think having these kinds of discussions help us understand storytelling and author intentions

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5hfanfiction · 7 years

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mean girls pt. 2

II.

Camila enters the changing room like she owns the place, positioning herself in front of the mirror to arrange her hair. She stretches her brow to check her eye makeup but figures there isn’t much point in fixing anything if she’s just leaving school to go to Normani’s house.

“What?” she snaps at two of the soccer players, who’d been staring at her since she walked in. It’s been like this ever since news of her break up with Liam had started making the rounds. They are quick to turn away, going back to getting dressed.

She catches the new girl studying her reflection and surprises herself when she smiles instead of telling her off. The girl returns the smile and approaches the mirror, coming to a still at the sink next to Camila’s where she starts applying a moisturizer to her face. Camila appreciates the methodical gestures, the way her fingers move upwards across her jawline and the way they draw circles on her temples and her forehead.

It’s no secret that Camila Cabello enjoys new, pretty little things.

“Mila, I told yo sorry ass I’d be out in ten minutes,” Dinah says, emerging from the shower area wrapped in a towel, wet hair dripping on her shoulders. “Ain’t no need to be here tryin’ to rush perfection.”

The new girl chuckles next to her and Camila kind of likes the sound of that.

Well, that’s a novelty.

She pushes the thought to the back of her head and watches Dinah from the mirror, “It’s been a while since I saw you naked, Dinah Jane.” She smirks, and feels oddly tickled when the new girl’s eyes widen and lock with hers in the reflection for a split moment. “You gotta deliver.”

“Yeah yeah yeah, you big perv,” Dinah says, shooing her away with exaggerated hand movements. “Just go to the parking lot, Mani’s already there.”

Camila pouts. “You’re no fun, China.”

Dinah pays her no mind, so Camila shrugs and winks at the new girl before leaving the changing room with a flip of her hair.

For all the attention they get at school as the Clique, something Camila had begun to nurture as early as freshman year, they much prefer the times when they’re together away from prying eyes. It’s not that they can’t handle attention — they thrive on it — but there’s a comfort, an ease, that can’t quite be reached when their every moment is being observed.

After they’d finished homework, they’d ordered pizza and now they’re all in Normani’s room, Camila sitting on the edge of the bed and the other two girls sitting on the floor in front of the TV. Normani and Dinah are fighting over what movie to watch even though Camila doubts they can even get halfway through it without her and Dinah’s parents calling them to return home. It is a school night after all.

There’s an unexpected moment of silence and Camila lifts her head to find Normani’s eyes zeroing in on her, twinkling with a playfulness that makes Camila swallow audibly, and not just because she’s eating.

“So…”

Camila should have known that Normani would choose the moment she’s happily munching on her pineapple pizza to focus on her and start with The Questioning™.

“I heard this rumor in school that Liam cheated on you, is that true?” Normani asks, enunciating the words carefully as if she’s treading dangerous waters. Camila appreciates the concern but she feels that Dinah’s snort is more in tune with the reality of the situation.

“Mani, please,” she says, tilting her head to the side as she gestures to herself. “Who would ever dare to cheat on this?”

Dinah lets out a loud laugh this time and Normani pinches her leg in annoyance.

“I was worried, okay?” she harrumphs, side-eyeing Dinah. “Yesterday you just told us you’d broken up with Liam and we didn’t get to talk properly until now.”

“It’s fine, Mani-bear, thank you.” Camila smiles and slides down the bed to settle between her best friends. “I broke up with him because, well, I didn’t feel anything anymore, really. I was just so bored whenever I had to spend time with him and I kept making excuses to avoid him.” She winces, recalling how she hasn’t felt much for the boy since mid junior year at best. “That’s not how a relationship should be, right?”

“So much for Greenwich’s power couple,” Dinah jokes, resting her hand on Camila’s thigh for support.

“Yeah, I guess.” Camila shrugs. “But at some point my happiness needs to be put ahead of how good we look together in public, no?”

“Wow, is this character development I’m witnessing?” Dinah covers her mouth with both hands, feigning shock.

Camila bumps her shoulder, “God, Dinah, you’re the worst!”

“No, but really, Mila,” Normani interrupts, reaching for Camila’s hand and intertwining their fingers. “Are you okay?”

“Honestly?” Both her friends nod and this is as serious as she’ll manage to have them tonight. It warms her heart that they tease and gossip and even know how to be downright mean, but when it counts, they’re always there for her. “It’s a little weird to be single after so long but mostly I just feel relieved that it’s finally over. Also, I get to play the hurt lover at school and win me some sympathy points. Gotta work hard to stay on top.”

Camila shimmies, a shameless grin on her face, and Normani and Dinah bursts out laughing.

“That’s my girl!” Dinah says, giving her a high-five.

“Enough about me though!” Camila claps and looks from Normani to Dinah with excitement. “What’s the gossip on your love lives?”

“Gurl, don’t even start with me,” Normani whines, lifting her left hand to stop them from talking over her. “I’ve been on a dry spell since June and that ain’t cool.”

“Aw Mani,” Dinah coos, blinking innocently. “I know how you feel. I haven’t had any action since last week, can you believe it?”

Camila punches her in the arm for Normani, just because she’s closer.

“You’re such a hoe, Dinah Jane.”

“Don’t be jealous, Mani, it looks bad on you.” Normani glares at her and goes back to sorting through the DVDs laid out on the floor. “Boys are boring, what do you want me to do? After a few weeks I just wanna throw them into a house on fire.”

Camila chuckles as she watches them bantering, feeling light and hopeful for the first time since senior year started.

With these girls at her side, no year could ever be bad.

Camila sighs, mouthing the words of Sylvia Plath’s Mirror as Mr. Keating reads them for the third time.

She rewards me with tears and an agitation of hands.

I am important to her. She comes and goes.

Each morning it is her face that replaces the darkness.

In me she has drowned a young girl, and in me an old woman

Rises toward her day after day, like a terrible fish.

He’s trying to explain the figures of speech present in the poem and he touches on possible interpretations to the text every now and then. It’s clear he doesn’t want to give anything away though, he wants the students to reach their own conclusions. He’s making wider gestures, using the board to stress the importance of this or that detail, but he isn’t straying from the ideas he’s already shared, it’s the same crap disguised as a new package. Camila has half a mind to announce to the class that it’s really not that hard to understand, but she is quite content to remain in the teacher’s good graces so she refrains. Maybe her classmates are just still stuck on weekend mode.

Her eyes wander around the room, studying her classmates to check who’s dumb enough to still not get it, but eventually they settle on the new girl, seated two rows in front of her and one to her right. Lauren Jauregui. She looks as bored as Camila feels and that makes her somewhat worthy of Camila’s attention, at least for the moment. The problem is that it’s been two weeks since school has started, the only classes they share are homeroom and AP Lit, and Camila’s gaze always seems to be drawn to her. It’s… unsettling.

Camila does not stare at irrelevants from afar.

With a huff, she focuses on the worksheet and starts doing what she assumes is going to be the homework for the next lesson. She blames her curiosity about the new girl on the fact that senior year so far has been nothing short of disappointing: she’s been spending way too much time worrying about essays for college applications, and her parents haven’t left Miami since school restarted, so she hasn’t been able to throw any parties. Even breaking up with Liam had been a mind-numbing experience and, five days later, she still feels no regrets and she doesn’t miss anything about him.

Yeah, senior year is definitely in need of a makeover.

Camila is so lost in her own thoughts she doesn’t even realize that the teacher has addressed the class, she just hears a familiar voice, the mix of husk and drawl that she’s come to associate with Lauren.

“The second stanza reflects on the condition of being a woman,” Lauren is saying when Camila’s eyes shoot up to watch her. Lauren always speaks with her hands, and when her answers become too extensive, she runs one of her hands through her hair self-consciously. “Women are forced into roles and there’s a social obsession with beauty and youth that women should abide by in order to simply feel valid. The woman searches for herself in the mirror —– or in the lake —– but instead she sees the passage of time, she sees herself dehumanized by how time has drowned her youth and brought along old age.”

Mr. Keating hums, thoughtful, “And what about the terrible fish?”

Camila puts her hand up and Mr. Keating signals for her to proceed.

“With that in mind, the terrible fish may be the woman’s demon. It represents her own critical gaze, viewing herself as aging and ugly.”

“Any other interpretations?” the teacher asks.

Camila zones out again, heart beating fast after she’d noticed Lauren looking at her as she spoke. She doesn’t allow herself to dwell on how pretty the girl is, and how undeniably smart.

Dinah is waiting for her outside the classroom after the bell rings and they take off to the cafeteria together. Normani is already sitting at their table with two of her cheerleaders, so the girls wave at her and go stand in the line before it gets too long.

“’Sup, Mani?” Dinah asks after they get their food. She plops down on a chair rather ungracefully and Camila rolls her eyes.

“Rumor has it Selena broke up with Justin,” Normani replies, almost as if she’s sharing a conspiracy theory.

“Ohhh!” Dinah brings her fingertips together and taps, grinning. “Senior year has not been nice to the school’s it couples.”

Camila scowls and then looks around the cafeteria, only to be met with the sight of the new girl entering with Ally Hernandez hot on her tail. “Have you talked to her?” she questions, to no one in particular. In hindsight, that had been a bad idea as now there are four girls very obviously turning their heads in all directions.

“Who?”

Camila points, aiming for discretion. This school has eyes and ears everywhere.

“Lauren?” Dinah asks, in her usual loud tone. Camila shakes her head. She should know better than to expect Dinah to be discreet. “She made it to the soccer team, you know this.”

“Yes, but have you talked to her? Is she nice?”

“She’s alright.” Dinah shrugs. “I mean, I haven’t had much time to talk to her or get to know her, but I’d say she’s the nicest of the new players so far. Hella talented with the ball too.”

“Should we invite her to sit with us for lunch?” Camila asks, trying to sound nonchalant.

Normani chokes on her food and Dinah drops her fork, staring wide-eyed at Camila. “Did I hear this right?”

Camila nods and nudges Dinah under the table to see if she gets the message that their business is meant to be private.

“You want someone else to sit with us?” Normani asks, rubbing her chest to soothe the area after her coughing fit.

“Yes.”

“Us?” Dinah snorts and Camila glares at her. “The Clique?”

“…yes?”

“A group that has been sitting together since freshman year with no one else except for the occasional boyfriend?”

“Hey, that’s not true,” Camila argues, not having expected Dinah’s reaction to be one of shock and feeling defensive about it. “We eat with Mani’s cheerleaders all the time.” She indicates the girls sitting next to Normani to make her point.

“Okay, I’ll give you that, Chancho,” Dinah concedes. “But we never had anyone else sitting with us because you wanted them to.”

“Whatever, Dinah.” Camila waves her hand dismissively and drags her chair back to stand up. “I’ll go get her.”

Normani gasps and Dinah laughs and Camila clenches her jaw, suppressing the urge to kill her best friends. She scans the cafeteria to try and find Lauren and, sure enough, she spots her on a table by the corner, unwrapping a homemade sandwich with that useless Hernandez by her side.

Camila can’t, for the life of her, understand how someone would willingly choose to hang around that girl, and she decides right then that rescuing Lauren from the displeasures of the bottom of the food chain by having her join the Clique for lunch had been an excellent idea.

“Hi,” she greets them both as she reaches them, smiling before standing at the head of the table between Lauren and Hernandez. Lauren looks at her curiously and Camila hears Hernandez draw a sharp breath that she chooses to ignore. Just like she chooses to ignore all the gazes directed her way for the simple reason that she’s approached this particular table in the middle of lunch. “Lauren, right?”

Lauren nods, tilting her chin to the side to lock eyes with her. Camila had never been this close to the girl and she’s a little mesmerized by how green her eyes are in the natural light bathing the cafeteria. She hadn’t expected that.

“I was wondering if you’d like to come and sit with us?” Camila hates how unsure she sounds. It’s not at all usual for her to feel flustered when addressing someone. She clears her throat as she points to the table she’d just left, swallowing a groan as she notices all four people there are doing a lousy job at pretending they’re not following her every move.

Lauren actually gapes at her and Camila finds it somehow endearing. Doesn’t she know she has everything it takes to be school royalty?

“I’m sorry but I’m already sitting with Ally,” Lauren says, smiling apologetically.

Camila lifts one eyebrow, “Excuse me?”

“I’m sitting with Ally.”

Camila scoffs and doesn’t bother trying to conceal her eye-roll. “Look, you’re new here, you don’t know how this school works, so I’ll be nice and explain the situation.”

It’s funny how situations can take a wrong turn in a heartbeat, Camila thinks bitterly.

Lauren doesn’t look apologetic anymore. In fact, now she looks exasperated by her attitude. “How kind of you,” she snarks, returning her attention to her sandwich.

“There’s a social hierarchy here like there is everywhere else,” Camila grits out, annoyed. “Wouldn’t you rather sit with the successful students who bring a good name to this school?”

“Wow ok, Regina George.” Lauren snickers. “I didn’t realize I’d landed in a high school movie when I first got here, my bad. But as I’ve said, I’m sitting with Ally so I’ll leave you to your successful students.”

“It’s okay, you can go,” Hernandez whispers.

Camila understands that at this point she’s coming across as rude and she should extend the invitation to Hernandez to break the tension and come out on top, but she can’t stand her joyful-singing, church-going, god-worshipping ass, and she just wants to punch her in the face every time the girl speaks.

Lauren cuts her off before she makes any decision.

“No, Ally,” she says, covering Hernandez’s hand with her own and giving it a light squeeze. “I’m not gonna leave you to go eat with someone I’ve never even talked to before.” She looks up at Camila and there’s fire in her eyes. “Are you done with your petty little display of power? Can we go back to eating in peace?”

“Sure.” Camila forces a smile that’s all teeth and threats. “Enjoy your last peaceful meal.”

“Oh, grow up.”

Camila had never thought there was any truth to the expression, but she can feel her blood boiling inside her veins and it takes all her willpower to leave the two girls behind instead of grabbing Lauren by her hair to smash her forehead against the table.

Everyone in the cafeteria is watching her and the whispering starts as soon as she takes the first step. Camila halts then, and makes a point of glaring at every single soul she sees whispering until they’re silent again.

God, this fucking school and its fucking spineless kids with no personal life.

She returns to her seat next to Normani and crosses her arms.

“Girl, you got owned,” Dinah says, cackling. “That was incredible. Guess you’ve found your match, eh?”

“I hate you,” Camila growls at her, making Dinah shrink in her seat.

“Well, okay then, Mila,” Dinah mumbles, putting her hands up in defeat. “Maybe next time ask her before lunch to avoid the public humiliation?”

Camila disregards her and turns to the cheerleaders. “I want her dead,” she snarls, determination growing side by side with her white-hot rage.

“We can make that happen,” Normani sing-songs, flipping her curly hair behind her shoulder and placing her chin on her hand to wink mischievously at Camila. “Let’s set up a plan.”

—-

A/N: hope you enjoyed that! Shit’s gonna get real in the next chapter. Feedback is greatly appreciated.

This will be updated once weekly on sundays :)

find also on wattpad (sipthegreentea) and ao3 (kordelicious and/or mjfeelz)

#UPDATE #series #AU #slash #camren #angst drama #humour #submission #mean girls

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sipthegreentea-blog · 7 years

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AO3 link / wattpad link

Title: mean girls Pairing: Camila Cabello / Lauren Jauregui Chapter 2 of ?: public humiliation

Summary:

"Lauren will finish this last year of high school drama free if it's the last thing she does."

AU where Camila is the queen bee and she's used to the school bowing at her feet until a new girl that refuses to play by the rules comes along.

ii. public humiliation

Camila enters the changing room like she owns the place, positioning herself in front of the mirror to arrange her hair. She stretches her brow to check her eye makeup but figures there isn't much point in fixing anything if she's just leaving school to go to Normani's house.

"What?" she snaps at two of the soccer players, who'd been staring at her since she walked in. It's been like this ever since news of her break up with Liam had started making the rounds. They are quick to turn away, going back to getting dressed.

She catches the new girl studying her reflection and surprises herself when she smiles instead of telling her off. The girl returns the smile and approaches the mirror, coming to a still at the sink next to Camila's where she starts applying a moisturizer to her face. Camila appreciates the methodical gestures, the way her fingers move upwards across her jawline and the way they draw circles on her temples and her forehead.

It's no secret that Camila Cabello enjoys new, pretty little things.

"Mila, I told yo sorry ass I'd be out in ten minutes," Dinah says, emerging from the shower area wrapped in a towel, wet hair dripping on her shoulders. "Ain't no need to be here tryin' to rush perfection."

The new girl chuckles next to her and Camila kind of likes the sound of that.

Well, that's a novelty.

She pushes the thought to the back of her head and watches Dinah from the mirror, "It's been a while since I saw you naked, Dinah Jane." She smirks, and feels oddly tickled when the new girl's eyes widen and lock with hers in the reflection for a split moment. "You gotta deliver."

"Yeah yeah yeah, you big perv," Dinah says, shooing her away with exaggerated hand movements. "Just go to the parking lot, Mani's already there."

Camila pouts. "You're no fun, China."

Dinah pays her no mind, so Camila shrugs and winks at the new girl before leaving the changing room with a flip of her hair.

For all the attention they get at school as the Clique, something Camila had begun to nurture as early as freshman year, they much prefer the times when they're together away from prying eyes. It's not that they can't handle attention - they thrive on it - but there's a comfort, an ease, that can't quite be reached when their every moment is being observed.

After they'd finished homework, they'd ordered pizza and now they're all in Normani's room, Camila sitting on the edge of the bed and the other two girls sitting on the floor in front of the TV. Normani and Dinah are fighting over what movie to watch even though Camila doubts they can even get halfway through it without her and Dinah's parents calling them to return home. It is a school night after all.

There's an unexpected moment of silence and Camila lifts her head to find Normani's eyes zeroing in on her, twinkling with a playfulness that makes Camila swallow audibly, and not just because she's eating.

"So..."

Camila should have known that Normani would choose the moment she's happily munching on her pineapple pizza to focus on her and start with The Questioning™.

"I heard this rumor in school that Liam cheated on you, is that true?" Normani asks, enunciating the words carefully as if she's treading dangerous waters. Camila appreciates the concern but she feels that Dinah's snort is more in tune with the reality of the situation.

"Mani, please," she says, tilting her head to the side as she gestures to herself. "Who would ever dare to cheat on this?"

Dinah lets out a loud laugh this time and Normani pinches her leg in annoyance.

"I was worried, okay?" she harrumphs, side-eyeing Dinah. "Yesterday you just told us you'd broken up with Liam and we didn't get to talk properly until now."

"It's fine, Mani-bear, thank you." Camila smiles and slides down the bed to settle between her best friends. "I broke up with him because, well, I didn't feel anything anymore, really. I was just so bored whenever I had to spend time with him and I kept making excuses to avoid him." She winces, recalling how she hasn't felt much for the boy since mid junior year at best. "That's not how a relationship should be, right?"

"So much for Greenwich's power couple," Dinah jokes, resting her hand on Camila's thigh for support.

"Yeah, I guess." Camila shrugs. "But at some point my happiness needs to be put ahead of how good we look together in public, no?"

"Wow, is this character development I'm witnessing?" Dinah covers her mouth with both hands, feigning shock.

Camila bumps her shoulder, "God, Dinah, you're the worst!"

"No, but really, Mila," Normani interrupts, reaching for Camila's hand and intertwining their fingers. "Are you okay?"

"Honestly?" Both her friends nod and this is as serious as she'll manage to have them tonight. It warms her heart that they tease and gossip and even know how to be downright mean, but when it counts, they're always there for her. "It's a little weird to be single after so long but mostly I just feel relieved that it's over. Also, I get to play the hurt lover at school and win me some sympathy points. Gotta work hard to stay on top."

Camila shimmies, a shameless grin on her face, and Normani and Dinah burst out laughing.

"That's my girl!" Dinah says, giving her a high-five.

"Enough about me though!" Camila claps and looks from Normani to Dinah with excitement. "What's the gossip on your love lives?"

"Gurl, don't even start with me," Normani whines, lifting her left hand to stop them from talking over her. "I've been on a dry spell since June and that ain't cool."

"Aw Mani," Dinah coos, blinking innocently. "I know how you feel. I haven't had any action since last week, can you believe it?"

Camila punches her in the arm for Normani, just because she's closer.

"You're such a hoe, Dinah Jane."

"Don't be jealous, Mani, it looks bad on you." Normani glares at her and goes back to sorting through the DVDs laid out on the floor. "Boys are boring, what do you want me to do? After a few weeks I just wanna throw them into a house on fire."

Camila chuckles as she watches them bantering, feeling light and hopeful for the first time since senior year started.

With these girls at her side, no year could ever be bad.

Camila sighs, mouthing the words of Sylvia Plath's Mirror as Mr. Keating reads them for the third time.

She rewards me with tears and an agitation of hands.

I am important to her. She comes and goes.

Each morning it is her face that replaces the darkness.

In me she has drowned a young girl, and in me an old woman

Rises toward her day after day, like a terrible fish.

He's trying to explain the figures of speech present in the poem and he touches on possible interpretations to the text every now and then. It's clear he doesn't want to give anything away though, he wants the students to reach their own conclusions. He's making wider gestures, using the board to stress the importance of this or that detail, but he isn't straying from the ideas he's already shared, the same crap disguised as a new package. Camila has half a mind to announce to the class that it's really not that hard to understand, but she is quite content to remain in the teacher's good graces so she refrains. Maybe her classmates are just still stuck on weekend mode.

Her eyes wander around the room, studying her classmates to check who's dumb enough to still not get it, but eventually they settle on the new girl, seated two rows in front of her and one to her right. Lauren Jauregui. She looks as bored as Camila feels and that makes her somewhat worthy of Camila's attention, at least for the moment. The problem is that it's been two weeks since school has started, the only classes they share are homeroom and AP Lit, and Camila's gaze always seems to be drawn to her. It's... unsettling.

Camila does not stare at irrelevants from afar.

With a huff, she focuses on the worksheet and starts doing what she assumes is going to be the homework for the next lesson. She blames her curiosity about the new girl on the fact that senior year so far has been nothing short of disappointing: she's been spending way too much time worrying about essays for college applications, and her parents haven't left Miami since school restarted, so she hasn't been able to throw any parties. Even breaking up with Liam had been a mind-numbing experience and, five days later, she still feels no regrets and she doesn't miss anything about him.

Yeah, senior year is definitely in need of a makeover.

Camila is so lost in her own thoughts she doesn't even realize that the teacher has addressed the class, she just hears a familiar voice, the mix of husk and drawl that she's come to associate with Lauren.

"The second stanza reflects on the condition of being a woman," Lauren is saying when Camila's eyes shoot up to watch her. Lauren always speaks with her hands, and when her answers become too extensive, she runs one of her hands through her hair self-consciously. "Women are forced into roles and there's a social obsession with beauty and youth that women should abide by in order to simply feel valid. The woman searches for herself in the mirror - or in the lake - but instead she sees the passage of time, she sees herself dehumanized by how time has drowned her youth and brought along old age."

Mr. Keating hums, thoughtful, "And what about the terrible fish?"

Camila puts her hand up and Mr. Keating signals for her to proceed.

"With that in mind, the terrible fish may be the woman's demon. It represents her own critical gaze, viewing herself as aging and ugly."

"Any other interpretations?" the teacher asks.

Camila zones out again, heart beating fast after she'd noticed Lauren looking at her as she spoke. She doesn't allow herself to dwell on how pretty the girl is, and how undeniably smart.

"'Sup, Mani?" Dinah asks after they get their food. She plops down on a chair rather ungracefully and Camila rolls her eyes.

"Rumor has it Selena broke up with Justin," Normani replies, almost as if she's sharing a conspiracy theory.

"Ohhh!" Dinah brings her fingertips together and taps, grinning. "Senior year has not been nice to the school's it couples."

Camila scowls and then looks around the cafeteria, only to be met with the sight of the new girl entering with Ally Hernandez hot on her tail. "Have you talked to her?" she questions, to no one in particular. In hindsight, that had been a bad idea as now there are four girls very obviously turning their heads in all directions.

"Who?"

Camila points, aiming for discretion. This school has eyes and ears everywhere.

"Lauren?" Dinah asks, in her usual loud tone. Camila shakes her head. She should know better than to expect Dinah to be discreet. "She made it to the soccer team, you know this."

"Yes, but have you talked to her? Is she nice?"

"She's alright." Dinah shrugs. "I mean, I haven't had much time to talk to her or get to know her, but I'd say she's the nicest of the new players so far. Hella talented with the ball too."

"Should we invite her to sit with us for lunch?" Camila asks, trying to sound nonchalant.

Normani chokes on her food and Dinah drops her fork, staring wide-eyed at Camila. "Did I hear this right?"

Camila nods and nudges Dinah under the table to see if she gets the message that their business is meant to be private.

"You want someone else to sit with us?" Normani asks, rubbing her chest to soothe the area after her coughing fit.

"Yes."

"Us?" Dinah snorts and Camila glares at her. "The Clique?"

"...yes?"

"A group that has been sitting together since freshman year with no one else except for the occasional boyfriend?"

"Hey, that's not true," Camila argues, not having expected Dinah's reaction to be one of shock and feeling defensive about it. "We eat with Mani's cheerleaders all the time." She indicates the girls sitting next to Normani to make her point.

"Okay, I'll give you that, Chancho," Dinah concedes. "But we never had anyone else sitting with us because you wanted them to."

"Whatever, Dinah." Camila waves her hand dismissively and drags her chair back to stand up. "I'll go get her."

Camila can't, for the life of her, understand how someone would willingly choose to hang around that girl, and she decides right then that rescuing Lauren from the displeasures of the bottom of the food chain by having her join the Clique for lunch had been an excellent idea.

"Hi," she greets them both as she reaches them, smiling before standing at the head of the table between Lauren and Hernandez. Lauren looks at her curiously and Camila hears Hernandez draw a sharp breath that she chooses to ignore. Just like she chooses to ignore all the gazes directed her way for the simple reason that she's approached this particular table in the middle of lunch. "Lauren, right?"

Lauren nods, tilting her chin to the side to lock eyes with her. Camila had never been this close to the girl and she's a little mesmerized by how green her eyes are in the natural light bathing the cafeteria. She hadn't expected that.

"I was wondering if you'd like to come and sit with us?" Camila hates how unsure she sounds. It's not at all usual for her to feel flustered when addressing someone. She clears her throat as she points to the table she'd just left, swallowing a groan as she notices all four people there are doing a lousy job at pretending they're not following her every move.

Lauren actually gapes at her and Camila finds it somehow endearing. Doesn't she know she has everything it takes to be school royalty?

"I'm sorry but I'm already sitting with Ally," Lauren says, smiling apologetically.

Camila lifts one eyebrow, "Excuse me?"

"I'm sitting with Ally."

Camila scoffs and doesn't bother trying to conceal her eye-roll. "Look, you're new here, you don't know how this school works, so I'll be nice and explain the situation."

It's funny how situations can take a wrong turn in a heartbeat, Camila thinks bitterly.

Lauren doesn't look apologetic anymore. In fact, now she looks exasperated by her attitude. "How kind of you," she snarks, returning her attention to her sandwich.

"There's a social hierarchy here like there is everywhere else," Camila grits out, annoyed. "Wouldn't you rather sit with the successful students who bring a good name to this school?"

"Wow ok, Regina George." Lauren snickers. "I didn't realize I'd landed in a high school movie when I first got here, my bad. But as I've said, I'm sitting with Ally so I'll leave you to your successful students."

"It's okay, you can go," Hernandez whispers.

Camila understands that at this point she's coming across as rude and she should extend the invitation to Hernandez to break the tension and come out on top, but she can't stand her joyful-singing, church-going, god-worshipping ass, and she just wants to punch her in the face every time the girl speaks.

Lauren cuts her off before she makes any decision.

"No, Ally," she says, covering Hernandez's hand with her own and giving it a light squeeze. "I'm not gonna leave you to go eat with someone I've never even talked to before." She looks up at Camila and there's fire in her eyes. "Are you done with your petty little display of power? Can we go back to eating in peace?"

"Sure." Camila forces a smile that's all teeth and threats. "Enjoy your last peaceful meal."

"Oh, grow up."

God, this fucking school and its fucking spineless kids with no personal life.

She returns to her seat next to Normani and crosses her arms.

"Girl, you got owned," Dinah says, cackling. "That was incredible. Guess you've found your match, eh?"

"I hate you," Camila growls at her, making Dinah shrink in her seat.

"Well, okay then, Mila," Dinah mumbles, putting her hands up in defeat. "Maybe next time ask her before lunch to avoid the public humiliation?"

Camila disregards her and turns to the cheerleaders. "I want her dead," she snarls, determination growing side by side with her white-hot rage.

"We can make that happen," Normani sing-songs, flipping her curly hair behind her shoulder and placing her chin on her hand to wink mischievously at Camila. "Let's set up a plan."

#camren #camren fic #camila x lauren #lauren x camila #in which camila finds the new girl really pretty and wants to know her better #but she goes about it in the worst way possible #(because duh)#mean girls 5h fic

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