#bandit having no fucks to give

[ghostlypanda]

this scene from bluey has me screaming

#bluey #bluey spoilers #bluey smoochy kiss #bluey s3e26 #might be spoilers idk but just in case #omgg i've watched this sm #bluey's gd scream took me out i'm dead #bandit having no fucks to give #his daughter finding him so gross is so funny hahahah #this ep and 'rain' are legit my fav eps ever #bluey's pitch when she screams 'WHAT ARE YOU DOING NOW'

[liquidstar]

and now for something stupid

#but really i also just wanted to play around w this sort of coloring style bc its been FOREVER since ive used it #and i think i can make it look better now #AND i think i can make more sillay stuff like this and not have it take as long w cleaning up lines #anyway now you all understand the terrible dynamic between these three #phobo's infodump text is just copypasted from the wikipedia page for knives. #julliet ALSO uses knives is the thing so hes actually mansplaining < JOKE #he just wants to share. even if it gives her a headache. but he wouldnt mansplain he doesnt have it in him. hes ok with felonies tho #but julis life hasnt known peace since she was told to take care of the newbies #and shes ALSO a newbie (just slightly less so) so really this is probably just tartarus hazing her #theyd take one look at the two disorganized unserious overeager newbies and think ''you know what would be fucking hilarious'' #and pass them onto the neurotic slightly-less-newbie who takes everything as seriously as possible. disaster combination. #i cannot stress enough that this is a group of bandits and murderers theyre NOT above hazing. #deimos actually is doing the best job at it since he is stealing as we speak #i mean hes not supposed to do it to his teammates but still. on the right track #as for the dynamic between deimos and phobos themselves its like. theyre just bros. theyre both pretty similar in personality #except deimos is kinda more mean and cynical while phobos can be kinda. dense and naive despite literally where hes at in life #but most of the time theyre basically beavis and butthead #i would also like to stress that juli is not being homophobic she just already cannot stand these guys and cant believe the audacity #but. complete misunderstanding. karma for stealing wallets ig #this will never be cleared up by anyone ever #but again thats not their dynamic they are just beavis and butthead. and i guess that makes juli daria LOL #finn's ocs #finn's art

[worldsquietestjojosfan]

It's 2024 welcome back bandit queen

#i completely fucked up my oc #drew her ooc #how tf you drew your own oc ooc?????? #im a man capable of many things #so this is miriam she was abandoned as a baby and this one group of dangerous bandits found her and collectively raised her #shes muscle mommy because her 1000000 uncles wanted her to be able to self defense #because her family is wanted criminals so to capture them they may try to get her #shes also banned from killing and other illegal things because they want to give her some sort of normal life #they want her to have a better life than them #so raised with these values shes a very sweet and kind girl. a little shy by temprament #shes their little princess. but to society shes not. shes like fcking 6ft tall and 200lbs of muscle. #but shes just a cute little girl. #so avo. what does she do? lmao get in trouble by doing nothing #guilt by association guilt by unconventional appearance #her whole thing is more of a story about how a group of fucked up people who couldnt save themselves saved someone else (her) #i wanted to explore how a child could end up mostly normal despite environment #like obviously she stands out pretty bad in society. but her manners her morals her nature her wishes and desires. all that #yeah so i screwed up the drawing. this is called regression

[hyperionshipping]

Think the twins don't even care about Tricks because bandits dying is not all that concerning and I think people assumed "that little dog of Jack's" died with him.

I think Tricks only becomes a hassle sometime later on. But no one can seem to find him... Lilith keeps dealing with vandalization and her already small crew getting picked off ("It's like a professional is hitting us. I... I think I know who it is") and, I think, just because he can he fucks with streams/the towers. He's got so much hate in his body.

Oh, and Jack's shield. Now you see him, now you don't, and now a corrosive bullets lodged in the worst spot it could be. Killing you agonizingly slow! If he doesn't shoot again and... oh. He did already

#s/i: Borderlands #Mote self indulgent bc of HIS background I could see Lilith asking Zane to try to find Tricks and he thinks he gets close. But it never work #s out. The one true lead he gets ends up being an elaborate trap. And Zane's not stupid. He knows he got out because (Tricks) whoever set it #was leaving a very firm message. Lilith is pissed and says she should've killed him. He had to have been around Jack's body before they tras #hed it. Tricks leaves an Echo recording of him killing a crimson raider as they yell their location. It's gruesome enough Lilith doesn't fin #ish it. #<- this is all too say since Jack is gone Tricks has no idea how to act. He went through he depression and without Jack I think he starts to #teeter back towards being The Demon. He can't finish Jack's plan but he sure as hell can make sure no one gets Pandora. #Or. I go with the idea hes still depressed. Still not a person. Either way. I really like my idea of a side quest from him being that he as #ks you to kill some bandits who've been fucking up Jack's grave. Do it? He gives you the location to an old weapon stache? Listen to Lilith #who says tear it down? Tricks very calmly with no music or anything goes 'You Vault Hunters are all the same. I'm coming for you Lilith.' an #d the reward is next-to-nothing

[spoopy-moose]

I might be in the minority but I think they should’ve made your reputation LOWER if you killed bandits in pathologic

#killing bandits gives your a reward feels like a bit of the good old ludonarrative dissonance to me #I saw another post that was like it’s so weird that they rewarded u for killing bandits #when it kind of goes against the messages and characterisation #and I’m like fuck yeah!! #maybe the bandits aren’t being given enough humanity or something #I can’t explain it #also both classic and 2 have shit combat mechanics if they just made it so that you have to avoid fights it might be better experience #or I was thinking remove fighting altogether but then I was like oh it pulls away the anxiety #pathologic #pathologic classic hd #pathologic 2

[bobtheacorn]

The thing that happened to Steven Universe is happening to Bluey and I hate that I’m living to see it

#it’s a good show!!!!!!!!! #it’s not Perfect but it’s a good fuckjng show!!!! #it’s a genuinely good unique positive fun uplifting show #parents that watch bluey and start screaming abt how it makes them feel inadequate lazy shamed and stupid shut the fuck up #those are you problems #bluey #SU #‘it makes me feel bad for not playing with my kids 24/7’ #bandit and chili literally don’t do that #yeah sometimes they push themselves to play even when they don’t feel like it or have time buts it’s not abt making parents Feel Bad #it’s abt being like Maybe I do have time to play with this small creature I made just bc I love them and I love spending time with them #even if it’s just five minutes and even if I’m not really up to it #like yeh absolutely as a parent you need and deserve space from your goblin children dominating every moment of your life #but bluey goes out of its way to give bandit and chili those moments as well #it shows them struggling and being human about it #they have two charming (overwhelming) children and they’re out of shape and working jobs and missing being their own people #but they also LOVE THEIR KIDS #that’s not a bad thing to show kids #that’s not a bad thing to show parents either #it’s ok to miss who you were #I saw another article abt parents wanting to censor bluey for ‘body shaming’ and it made me evil for ten minutes

[bipherpol]

fun fact: i have an entire hoard of various unrelated fics that involve at least one member of cp9 related in some way to another character

#i think my favorite is the one where p much all of cp9 gets found as kids for some reason #by either rocinante or garp. roci's just like 'law have siblings' #while eight different kids are all just like 'what the fuck' #garp of course grabs all of them and drags them off to dawn and is just like 'luffy ace have more siblings' #(dadan and the bandits are not prepared for this) #(makino is very tempted to borrow one of the boys' pipes and whack garp with it) #meanwhile the cp9 kids are all just like 'um' #'you're my kids now!' 'i am literally like sixteen' says jabra #'is it considered turning traitor if we were kidnapped by a vice admiral and told we didn't have a choice' #i have at least one (1) fic where kalifa knows nami at least #and if you think i don't have a fic where i take kaku and forcibly adopt him as banchina's nephew and usopp's cousin you are wrong #listen i live for adopted siblings and chosen siblings and forcefully chosen siblings #so like. #also let's be real if garp dropped cp9 off at the bandits luffy would forcefully adopt all of them in a heartbeat #ace and sabo from off to the side: just give in now. we tried to kill him for like a monthstraight and he still liked us #anyway i have so many ridiculous fic concepts #and about 300k of various paulie/lucci fics hiding on my hard drive

[pinacoladamatata]

drops rumarin fic in the middle of the night just because

#rumarin #but if rumarin was a parent #who's 17ish year old daughter is quickly realizing neither of them know what the fuck they're doing #bonding while bullshitting their way around skyrim #'he would not have kids' i hear some of you say #he like. literally will if you adopt them skyrim kids but anyway #have you considered that having a child gives him like unlimited things to complain about? #the feeding? the toys? the fact you can't take an infant to raid a bandit camp? #i mean. you *can* but not without everyone judging you #this is also such a funny concept to me bc like. on the one hand. your mother is dragonborn. hero of legend. awesome soundtrack. #meanwhile your dad is just like... some guy? #i am fucking vibrating in the corner over here i think this is funny as shit #''are you getting ahead of yourself by trying to make your tes6 character?'' #yes.

[roguemonsterfucker]

I had my chest cut open for the first time so that I can stay alive long enough to take care of Bandit and my other birds 😂

I’ve had these heart problems for years. My whole life.

But I only decided to do something about it because I have all these little lives relying on me. And I want to be there to enjoy them and take care of them.

#y'all might not know this about me but i'm really fucking suicidal #not in danger right now obviously lol #but like... #the month before i got Bandit i was literally planning my death #i got better before i got him but honestly getting him and the rest of these birds #gave me something to live for #that i didn't have before #and now i'm taking steps to extend my life #that's big for me #i've always lived wanting to die and now i'm working to stay alive #it's hard #it's a daily struggle #but hearing bandit say 'i love you' gives me the strength to get through a day #suicide cw

[ifwebefriends]

My thoughts during “The Sign” [SPOILERS!!!!!]

ID in ALT

More thoughts under the cut

So I think most of us can agree that this is the best episode of Bluey so far. It was so emotional and satisfying in ways that are kinda new for Bluey. It answered so many questions while giving us a few new ones. I’ve been waiting for this episode for months and it did not disappoint in any way.

This is just a Chekov’s firing squad of an episode. As in a lot of stuff that was set up in earlier episodes all pay off in this episode. I kinda understand why people love soap operas now lol. I will say that this episode was a tad overwhelming for me in the best way possible. As in I had to pause and rewind every 30 seconds or so so I could emotionally process what was happening before moving forward (but that’s a me thing). There was just so much going on and I’m happy about that.

Now onto individual thoughts about specific things:

The callback to Baby Race (“you took your first steps in that house!”) really got to me because Baby Race was the first episode of Bluey that I watched and it immediately made me fall in love with it so it just got to me.

When Chilli said “Frisky and I came up here as teenagers to…um…think,” my mind started racing immediately with “what the FUCK happened at the Lookout?” “Who hurt Frisky and/or Chilli?” And I’m just so curious about what made Chilli say that line like that but we’ll probably never know what happened.

So yeah that scene at the end when the music was playing and Bandit ripped the sign out of the ground and Chilli tackled him to the ground ABSOLUTELY CHANGED my brain chemistry y’all. I can’t articulate my feelings any more than that.

I know some people were upset that Brandy ended up getting pregnant but I thought it was great for her! I’m happy for her! And I think that even though she got what she wanted in the end doesn’t negate the feelings she had about her infertility earlier. But I think we’re all wondering who the father is and I don’t know if the show really needs to answer that.

The whole message of “we’ll see” in terms of if something is good or bad is such a mature message that I never really thought of like that so I will be taking that philosophy forward in life. Congratulations Bluey, you managed to teach a 22-year-old childless person something new and insightful about life that I don’t think I’ve learned from another show.

I want to know more about what Bob was going through and feeling and why he went to India, but again, we’ll probably never know.

I just love how the wedding photos were beautiful but imperfect. Like of course we’re not perfect and nothing will ever be perfect but it’s beautiful and worth remembering anyway.

So many little jokes and moments were so funny in a mature way (I.e. “are we allowed to do that?” And Nana thinking there was about to be a baby announcement) were just so funny and memorable.

I think some people would say it’s a cop-out to end up not selling the house after building it up for 2 episodes but I don’t know, I think it works. I think Bluey and Bingo learned a valuable lesson and Bandit (and Chilli kinda) learned it’s not always about making their kids lives “perfect” in their eyes. Also I’m just personally glad they didn’t end up selling the house and I also kinda like that it wasn’t entirely their choice to keep it.

On a more serious note I think this episode has some interesting commentary on like gender roles and gender relations in straight relationships. In this episode Chilli and Frisky (both women) have to deal with their male significant others pressuring them to move with them far away from what they know and love. In the end they don’t end up moving and the men didn’t seem to have like malicious or selfish intent with it, they were just kinda basing their choices off their jobs instead of what’s best emotionally for their loved ones. But I think it’s interesting to have this conflict where gender is kinda brought up in a way (“because your husband is making you”). It kinda plays into the traditional idea of like men are the breadwinners and the family has to move with them regardless of what they actually want. And this episode kinda like deconstructs that and says “no, it’s not always about the job or money, it’s also sometimes about connections and emotional attachment.” And I’m not saying that you should never move or whatever, but really weigh your options. I just thought that it was interesting that this episode kinda touched on that.

So yeah that’s kinda the main thoughts I had on this episode if you made it this far thank you for reading my rambles and have a good one!

#Bluey #bluey the sign #meme #Bluey heeler #rad heeler #bandit heeler #chilli heeler #baby race #my ramblings #my rambles #frisky heeler #brandy cattle #spoilers #bluey the sign spoilers #bluey spoilers

[beanghostprincess]

Dragon giving Luffy to Garp with the assumption that he's going to take care of him until he's ready to meet his son (because it's dangerous to have a child while he starts a fucking revolution, thank you very much) and then Garp just- Leaving Luffy on a village where he spends 24/7 alone waiting for the pirate he now considers his role model (because he doesn't have anybody else and Shanks is the only father figure around and he's just that nice) to come back from his adventures, and only being taken care of by Makino who has no responsibility over Luffy but still takes care of him because otherwise the kid would probably die from starvation, and lucky for him she's a sweetheart. And then he loses Uta, his only friend (with no explanation at all), to then carry the guilt of Shanks losing an arm for him and suddenly his legacy as a pirate. And then he's sent to another place with other people he doesn't know, because Garp thought "oh, yes, wonderful idea to leave my grandson with this depressed kid and some bandits" and Luffy luckily befriends Ace and Sabo because they're good people. Luckily. And luckily, Dadan is a good mom and loves them. But then Sabo fucking dies because nobody with authority was protecting these kids (I wonder who could've done that). And now Luffy has to carry both guilt, a legacy, and the biggest abandonment issues I've ever seen after losing his best friend and his brother when they were just children.

And I'm not saying Garp has made horrible decisions but he has made horrible decisions and Dragon should hit his own dad with Sabo's metal pipe.

#idk i just think dragon wouldn't like this #sabo: ah yes garp did *explains everything* #dragon: give me your metal pipe son i am going to beat the shit out of grandpa #i don't think he will but i think he should #i have resentment towards garp i know he's a funny and complex character and he's a good person but i am angry #i think we talk a lot of shit about dragon and shanks for being 'negligent parents' (they aren't btw learn what that means first please) #when garp is right there #one piece #monkey d. luffy #monkey d. dragon #monkey d. garp #red haired shanks #asl brothers #uta #portgas d. ace #revolutionary sabo

[pjackk]

Extremley Urgent Action Needed

Hi everybody i hate to to it but im in a realy bad spot and ive been pretty much bummed out really badly lately and lots of people on here are actually being really bad to me constantly and telling me lots of mean shit all the time and im pretty much in a super bad spot because im mentally fucked up badly right now and the theres some some holidays and shit comign up and i dont give a fuck about heaven or hell cuz my life is fucked anyways and going to shit so i dont know how it could really get worst but i pretty much want to treat myself and practice self care by making the right choices for me and getting shit that i really want as a gift to myself since nobody else will ever get me free shit since im a societal freak and a piece of shit apparently and something i really want is a Cast Iron Money Man

So the great part about the guinness Stout moneyman is that on top of making me enjoy my life for once in my fcking life if i had him it would teach me how to save my coins and put them in a safe place so they dotn keep falling down the drain because whenever im counting my pennies and other brown or shiny colored coins its always in the sink cuz thats the only place not filled to the brim with stupid shit i keep finding LOL i keep finding shit on the ground and in the trash and its often interesting as fuck shit like a stick that would be realy goood for turning into a weapon if needs to be if i was attacked from every angel a great way to fight them and a perfect advantage to have is to have the range advantage so if the thieves and other bandits were coming at me with knives and shit i would be able to bash them with my stick and maybe break there bodys while im at it and i could legaly say i killed them to defend my self and all my other shit so anyways theres tons of shit everywhere and since i just throw away my dishes when im done with them because they are way to dirty and beyond even the level to get it cleaned no more cuz shit is dried on there and wont come off if i make it wet i just gie up so that means theres never shit in my sink exept for the coins when im counting them but the big problem is i dont have a money man made out of cast iron to keep my coins safe so they fall down the drain and when i try to pop them up by dumping oil in the drain and using gargage disposal switch it just crunches them up and shoots fragments into my glasses and always breaks my glasses so i always have to get new glasses since they are always breakign whenever i lose my coins but the big problem is since i dont have my coins no more since they all get all torn up and shit its super hard to afford new glasses or food at all even though i dont technicaly have to eat its always fun to eat yummy shit so please consider to send me money to help muy shit as fuck mental get better and invest in my prosperity i promise u it will trickle down to u and u will benefit from my well being im actually working on a new CD right now with dope as fuck music but its realy really hard to be creative when i dont want to get out of bed because im always hung tf over from drinking a shit load of top notch gin a the pub all night and feeling super depresed basicaly my Guinenss beer Shaped money man would be a perfect way to solve my problems let me know if u want to help by clicking the beer above and giving me money to spend on my cast iron money man

[gloxk]

Sneaky linkin’

(Eren Y. Armin A. Connie S.)

A/N: i’m not COMPLETELY back, but I am making a slight improvement w my mental health… so here’s sum slight for yall🤷🏽‍♀️. I kinda hate this but maybe yall will like it..ion know. Luv ya tho. 17+.

Synopsis: Aot men as sneaky links.

Warning: Smut.. F/M

━━━━━━━⚠︎━━━━━━━

Eren! ᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏 ———Back seat bandit

Eren..is definitely a back seat bandit. It’s mainly because he has a nice car, why not show it off?

Now, all i’m going to say is (Persian rugs- jacquees version.) Oh lawwwd, he definitely plays that while giving the most sloppiest, nastiest, messiest, back arching back shots ever. This man does NOT play.

Hair puller, choker, dirty talker. He’s the type to make you tell him how good he’s fucking you. “Uh-huh, right there? You like that baby?” And you better tell him too.

The hair pulling thing just comes by instinct. You could be giving this man the sloppiest head ever, deep throating him till hes hitting the back of your esophagus and all. The type of head that makes him feel like he’s shifting reality. He will tug your hair to get a real good look at your face, saliva dripping down your chin and red coating your face. A face that just screams ‘ Am I making you happy?’. He would stare at you with a shit eating grin just while the camera flash hits your face.

Degrading as fuck. He would just say some shit to boost his ego during sex. “I know you like that shit, stop acting like you don’t.” & “You can scream my name louder than that. Try again.” & “Stop fuckin running.” Don’t be fooled now, he’s also going to talk you through it and give you reassurance. “You doin so good f’me.” & “it’s all yours mami.” & “You look so pretty right now.”

Ugh this man just loves to have his hand wrapped around your body. Around your waist, neck, thighs, hands—it don’t matter to him. He loves touching on you. Any time yall link his hands just find their way over your body.

Connie! ᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏 ——— Any time any where

Connie..is the type of guy who can fuck ANYWHERE. Car, room, closet, random family bathroom at a gas station—he don’t care.

If you’re down, he’s down. Y’all could be out shopping and he fucks you in the dressing room.

This man LOVES when you ride him. He would just watch you in awe while you bounce up and down on him.

Definitely a talker during sex, he loves telling you how good you’re doing. “Mhm—fuck—I love when you do that.” & “Cmoonn look at me while you do it.” & “Arch that back mama.”

Now, he’s a recorder. He records everything. He has a little folder in his phone dedicated to your link ups.

Although he’s gonna dick you down anywhere he can, his favorite place is the shower. Got some music playing in the background (P power - gunna) while he’s plowing into you. The shower couldn’t even cover up your loud moans.

Pull out ? Nah, “You wanna be grown, let’s be grown baby.” He doesn’t believe in wasting, so either you sucking it up or taking that shit.

Armin! ᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏 ——— munch

Armin..is an eater. He’s gonna eat like it’s his last meal every fucking time. His tongue game is vicious. Absolutely diabolical, the messiest head you will ever get.

Salvia dripping on the couch, tears falling from your eyes due to overstimulation, legs locking around his head—he still wouldn’t stop. He won’t stop till you force him to.

Hold on now, Armin ain’t just an eater, he got good dick too. He’s a saint that’s gonna fuck you like a sinner. Let him get some liquor in his system and you’re going to be begging for round 2.

Speaking of drunk Armin, he’s gonna fuck you against a wall. Just something that’s going to happen one way or the other. One leg in the air while the other dangles just above the floor, his hands gripping on your ass so hard it leaves a mark.

Oh it doesn’t stop there either, he’s going to stumble his way to the bed and take you there too.

Hella vocal whimpering, moaning, whispering. He’s going to let you know your pussy good. “God-you feel so fuckin good.” & “Please keep doing that.”

Loves teaching you new things, different kinks, positions, anything of the sort. I know he just loves exploring and experimenting things with you. He’s a freaky freak for sure. <3

━━━━━━━⚠︎━━━━━━━

whore…

#eyena writes♡ #eren jeager smut #eren jeager x reader #eren x black fem!reader #eren x black reader #eren x reader #eren x y/n #eren x you #eren yeager #eren smut #armin x black reader #armin x y/n #armin x you #armin fluff #armin x reader #plug connie #connie x black reader #connie smut #armin smut #aot smut

[angelltheninth]

Cockwarming and Banter with an Orc Warlord

Pairing: Male!Orc Warlord x Fem!Reader

Tags: nsfw, smut, fluff, banter, cuddles, kissing, nuzzles, affirmation, cockwarming, lots of cum

A/N: I wanted to write filth but that can happen later, for now have this, its only slightly filthy.

You were already sore from being on the thick cock of your new orc warlord. It was another victory for him and his clan and as his favorite human you wanted to give show him your appreciation. His large hands pushed you down on his cock, another surge of cum washing over your insides as you collapsed onto his muscular chest.

"Tired already, pet? The party just started. Everyone's having fun out there tonight." If you were able to focus on something other then him you'd be able to hear the various, eclipsing moans, begging, roars and growls going on outside. "You need to work on your stamina."

"Do I? Maybe I just need some more motivation." You sigh against him, wiggling your hips on his cock, not wanting to leave, to lose the fullness of him inside of you.

"Mhm. Don't worry, I have all night to train you." He nuzzled the top of your head, his tusks grazing your forehead, tickling you a little.

You laughed and pulled back, "You're being awfully affectionate tonight, my Lord." His arms circled back around you and pulled you close, his cock nudging against the entrance to your womb again, "I-I didn't say I dislike it..."

"I don't know, you looked like you were having fun earlier, being used, being fucked out of your mind. I never knew you could make that face." Speaking of, you could feel how much your face was heating up due to his words. Which was strange because you heard him say much dirtier things not even a few minutes ago. "Getting shy on me now, pet? Don't be, I still have so much to show you."

Starting from the corner to your lips he dragged his lips all the way to your chest, sucking most of your soft breast in his mouth and letting his sharp teeth leave a little imprint before giving the other the same treatment. All the while he kept his grip on your hips strong, moving you back and forth, keeping your cunt stimulated and full.

"A little rest, please." You wanted to push on his shoulders but your hands ended up sliding around them instead as he thrust his hips upwards, startling you forward with the sudden jolt of pleasure.

"You're very lucky you're such a cute human. Many women would do anything to have my favor the way you do." He was pretty popular in the surrounding towns, as was most of his clan, from doing mundane things like helping with farm work to warding off bandits. As a result when they went off to battle and won there were plenty of people scrambling to congratulate them. You just so happened to be the lucky woman that caught the Warlord's eyes.

"Don't you think you're the lucky one, my Lord? I hope you know I have a lot of favorable suitors to- ah!" You teased him, knowing it would get a rise out of him in all kinds of ways. And you got what you wanted, him pushing back up, his thick cock scrapping your walls, "Jealous?"

"Of tiny humans? Please. I could break any of you easily." Only he was too fond of humans, at least some of them, to do so. "I could break you in so many ways, pet." Your pussy fluttered at his threatening tone which caused something dangerous to flash behind his eyes for a brief moment, "Stupid human, too horny for her own good. Good thing I'm here to keep you on a tight leash." His lips found yours, his growling and snarls momentarily silenced in favor of tasting you. You seemed to be intent on driving him crazy tonight, good, it means you're learning his ways. Exactly what he's looking for in a future mate.

#monster x reader #monster romance #monster boyfriend #monsterfucking #monster lover #orc x reader #monster imagine #monster x human #monster x girl #monster smut #orc smut #monster fic #terato

[bisexualiteaa]

Make-Up Sex

Cooper Howard x Fem Reader (SMUT!!)

CW: NSFW MDNI!! Rough sex, riding, Cooper getting tied up, p in v, p0rn w/o plot, irradiated cream pie x2, mention of needles, cursing, established relationship, slight OOC Cooper, slight deviance from show

AN: I’m really enjoying writing for asks! Thank you to those who have submitted any, my ask box is always open so feel free to send in more! I will do my best to get to them as I can, and to the Anon who asked for this one, I hope I did your ask justice! Enjoy our favorite cowboy getting tied up and railed. Save a horse, ride a cowboy y’all. 🤠 apologies if it seems rushed, I wrote it at like 2am and post this on my way to work 😭

Synopsis: Cooper Howard is one stubborn man, and after a while of getting on your nerves, you finally find a way to make him apologize.

He had been getting on your nerves all day. First instance was when you two were out scavenging after finishing a bounty hunt, your supplies were running a bit low after being out for three whole days longer than you’d anticipated. You were getting ready to shoot one of the bandits that managed to get a stray bullet to graze your cheek when he killed them before you could even get a chance. You evil eyed him as he said “ain’t fun havin’ your kills stolen from ya, is it sweetheart?” He asked, making you roll your eyes and give a groan as you sifted through the raider’s pockets for anything useful. No such luck. A whole three bottle caps, and a plastic fork. So you drug your feet as you both carried on towards home.

Second instance was when you both were surprised by some radroaches and radscorpions after opening the door to what looked to be a vacant rest stop to get supplies from. A few wasted bits of ammo later, you make it inside and he made fun of your screams for a whole two hours. “Ain’t afraid of raiders, needles, nothin’ but bugs” he would say as he’d laugh so hard he’d go into a coughing fit while your face burned bright red with anger and embarrassment as he’d use his inhaler.

The third instance was where you drew the line. He was sifting through his bag trying to find his canteen of water after not finding shit at the rest stop. “Motherfucker” he said to himself, upon not being able to find it or anything really to have to drink. So instead of asking, he just went into your bag when you were busy trying to scavenge more bodies, took yours and drank it dry without telling you, and you had at least three more hours on foot until you made it back to the settlement. So when you went to go get a drink of water, the horror and plain rage on your face when you felt that it was empty was immeasurable. “How in the fuck is this thing empty? I JUST filled it yesterday!” You said, turning to look at Cooper as you both walked and the look on his face was all you needed as an answer. “You drank all o’ my water? What ‘n the hell happened to your canteen?” You asked, your southern drawl becoming more evident the angrier you got. “Must’ve forgot it” he said, making you look at him like he just spoke a whole different language. “You forgot it?” you asked, wondering how in the hell the deadliest motherfucker in this wasteland was traveling with you and just forgot his water. “Oh you gotta be shittin’ me….You know what, I don’t even wanna know how you managed that. We’re almost back to the settlement, I’ll refill it when we get there” you said angrily, moving ahead of him a little to prove that he’d pulled the last straw on your patience.

When you made it back to your settlement and back to the place you called home, you organized all the supplies you’d gotten, (which wasn’t much) putting them where they all were supposed to go, refilling canteens of water, and changing into more comfortable clothes as night began to fall. It was around dinner time that Cooper finally noticed that he really managed to piss you off.

You’d hardly ever given Cooper the cold shoulder in the time you two had been together, he was married before so he wasn’t ignorant to what being given the cold shoulder meant, but Cooper Howard was a stubborn man, one set in his ways so when he feels there’s no need to do something, he will not do it. “You gonna sit here ‘n ignore me all night?” He asked, and all you did was cross your arms in response, making him shake his head. “I’ll take that as a yes, but we’ll see how long that lasts, ya always come around somehow” he said arrogantly, only adding fuel to the fire and he knew it, it’s just how he was. He was an asshole, he was when you met him and apparently that charm never fully left. He was partly right however which is what you didn’t want to give him credit for. Even when you were really mad at him, you always came around at some point. His mouth got him into a lot of trouble, but it also managed to get him out of it too, his charisma and smooth talking always landing with some kisses to open you back up or make up sex to help you forget. You never were the kind of girl to let good dick sway you out of being mad but it was attached to a man that cared about you in ways no one else ever did, so you supposed he was at least a good exception. “You’ll come ‘round when that ache sets in, when you realize your dainty lil’ fingers can’t do anything close to what mine do to you” he said by your ear as he stood up from the dining room table, working you up and trying to get you to sleep with him to forget about your anger, but just as he was stubborn, you were just as set in your ways too. Though he knew it was a tough decision for you, you’d both gone a whole two weeks out there in the wastelands collecting caps from bounties and scavenging for supplies without any time or a means to sneak away and be with one another, so you were both pent up and he knew it. It was half the reason for your attitude to begin with, although you supposed he likely knew that too.

You got up from the chair in the kitchen a few minutes after he moved to the bedroom, getting ready for bed. You stopped him as he’d just taken his boots off, finally ready to be on speaking terms again but they were your terms. “Here’s how this is gon’ work. You, are gonna lay on that bed, and let me fuck you like I hate you because right now, I am doing everythin’ in my power not to hate you, and you ain’t been makin’ that an easy feat” you said, your eyes looking straight into his as if you were staring right into his soul, if he still even had one. “Yeah? And what makes you think I’m just gonna let you get away with that, lil’ lady?” He asked in a condescending tone, making you chuckle. “Because I know damn well you’re as pent up as I am, so if you want any, and wanna get back into my good graces, this is how it’s gonna happen. And I will accept that as an apology for the shit you’ve done” you replied as you stepped closer, not caring that you had to look up at him when you spoke, the venom in your words was enough to prove the point you were trying to make. Your response making him huff a short, dry chuckle, impressed by how well you stood your ground, so he awaited your orders. “Now take your damn clothes off” you said, making him grin as he did as he was told, he could get used to you bossing him around like this. Your accent got a little thicker when you were mad, and the way you barked orders and told him what to do with a quip ready for whatever he had to say in response, he had to admit was a side of you he liked seeing more than he’d ever admit to. He shook his duster from his shoulders, then worked at his shirt as you pulled yours off and over your head, then moved to unclasp your bra and dispose of it on the floor, not caring where it went. Your eyes raked each other’s frame with almost visible tension as you stood a few feet apart from each other. Enough space to keep him from using his hands to get you to submit, but enough to also allow you to close the gap when you felt comfortable enough to. You both worked at undoing your pants, tossing them aside to be forgotten about until morning. “Get on the bed” you ordered, leaving the room to grab his rope from his saddlebag in the kitchen. When you returned, he noticed the item in your hands, giving you a wicked grin. “Gonna tie me up, sweetheart?” He asked in that condescending tone, making you chuckle as you tied his hands to the rungs of the bed frame nice and tight. Tight enough to keep him in place, not too tight to hurt too much, he was an asshole sure but he was still your asshole. “Sure am. Gonna need to earn the right back t’ touch me, and you ain’t earned it yet” you replied, straddling his lap as you ground your slick pussy against his cock. He gave a groan at the feel of you, watching as your hips moved against his to coat him in slick for when you’d line him up to your entrance. Key word there was when because you wanted to make this torturous. You moaned as you bucked your hips against him, his head bumping your clit as you used him for your own pleasure. “Think I could use you just like this. Mmm…make myself cum then leave you here achin’ for more” you threatened, running your hands along your figure and toying with your breast to tease him extra, hearing groans leave him each time your pussy would glide along his cock. “Now that ain’t very nice of you” he replied, making you grin. “Never said nothin’ ‘bout playin’ nice sugar. Still waitin’ for you to say you’re sorry” you responded, making him grunt as you continued to play with yourself and moan all sweetly. “I ain’t apologizin’, no need to” he said, making you click your tongue. “A shame, looks like you ain’t cummin’ tonight then” you said, continuing your movements as you got closer and closer to letting that knot snap inside you. He wanted- no he *needed* to feel your gummy walls wrapped around his cock, so the fact that you were using it in a way that couldn’t afford him that, was already working his nerves.

“What’s wrong? Don’t like what I’m givin’ you? Should be thankful I’m even touchin’ you with how mad you made me” you said, going a little quicker now with your movements so he tried focusing on that, focusing on the way your clit would bump that spot right under his tip over and over. So when you came from grinding against it rather than seating on it and *ruined*that chance of still getting to finish, he gave a disgruntled grunt.

“Aww what’s the matter? Did I stop somethin’?” You asked in a deeper, condescending tone that had his dick throbbing in need. He’d never seen this evil of a side of you before, but you had only just started. “Whatchya want Cooper? Go ‘head, tell me” you said, making him grunt. “Want you t’ shut up and ride me already” he said, making you chuckle before landing a harsh slap across his face, the sound of your hand meeting his cheek rang through the room. “You ain’t in the position to be givin’ orders sugar. I thought you had manners” you said as he turned and looked back at you, astonished one by the power behind that smack and two, by the tone you were getting with him. “I’ll ask you one more time, what’dya want me to do to you, hmm?” You asked, and knowing now what power you had behind just one of those smaller hands of yours, he relented. “Ride me, please” he grunted, making you smile and lay a soft kiss to his cheek to try and soothe where you slapped him. “See? Not so bad now is it? Now if ya just apologize, I’ll take some RadAway and let you cum” you said, and judging by the look on his face, you could say that wasn’t going to happen. “Fuck you” he spat, making you chuckle. “Oh I am gonna fuck you, don’t you worry” you said as you lined him up to your entrance, sinking down on him inch by torturous inch. You were having way too much fun with this, and he didn’t like that he couldn’t have his way for a change. His hips involuntarily bucked up to try and shove more of himself into your tight cunt, but you moved to where it wouldn’t happen, making him grip the bed frame where he was tied to. “Someone’s gettin’ antsy, best keep them hips steady if you want this to continue” you said, making him growl under his breath before giving a groan once you were fully seated on him. You gave a moan as his tip nudged the apex to your cervix, moving your hips back and forth to where you would get off, but not do much for him. He gave you an angry look that made you laugh. “What’s the matter honey? Ya asked me to ride you already, it’s what I’m doin’” you said, making him grit his teeth as he did his best to hold his bearings. “But I guess you were good and didn’t move after I warned you so I’ll throw a bone atchya” you said, moving up and down on him, earning a groan from him once more that mingled with the moans falling from your lips. “Fuck…” he breathed, making you chuckle and smirk in that bratty way that he wanted to fuck off your face already, but he couldn’t. Despite his expressions and reactions, he was enjoying this too much but he couldn’t let you know that.

“Mmm, Cooper…” you moaned sweetly as you bounced on his cock, his name sounded heavenly when it fell from your lips, he could hardly get enough of it. He watched as your tits bounced up and down with your movements, the way your thighs jiggled as you moved, god how he wanted to grip them so bad right now. To hold you down and buck up into you until your eyes were rolling back in your head and you were screaming, but this was your show to run. You picked up the pace a little bit, going faster and angling where his tip would brush against that sweet bundle of nerves deep inside. He felt the way your walls started to close around him, sucking him in each time you’d come down, and fluttering around him. You were close. You were so caught up in chasing that feeling that you almost missed what he said. “Fuck- ‘m sorry” he spoke softly, finally apologizing to you. “What was that? I don’t think I quite heard ya there” you said, making him grunt. He should have known that you would milk the shit out of this. “I said I was- fuck- sorry” he repeated, making you hum but it wasn’t enough, not yet. So you stopped. “Sorry for what?” You asked, and he didn’t seem very happy at the fact that you stopped moving all together when he was so close to cumming yet again. “Dammit, wadn’t sayin’ sorry enough? I fuckin’ apologized like you wanted” he snapped, making you slap him across his cheek once more, this one stinging a bit more because it landed in the exact same spot as the last one. Though the tingling sensation of pain never lasted very long, it was enough to make his dick throb while inside of you and he prayed you wouldn’t notice. “Lose the attitude before I hop off and take care of myself then leave you tied up here all night” you said, making him huff in response. “Fine” he replied gruffly through gritted teeth. “Good, now I wanna hear you say it. What are you sorry for?” You asked as you started your pace back up, making him groan again as your hips and ass slapped down against him harshly. “Sorry f’ bein’ an asshole” he grunted out. “And?” You asked, needing just a little bit more before you were satisfied. “And f’ makin’ you mad” he finished, and you were content with that. “Happy?” He asked, making you hum and pretend to contemplate if you were for a minute before finally answering. “Yeah, I’ll take that” you said, placing your hands on his chest as you bounced up and down on him once more, earning a relieved sigh from him. “Just like that sweetheart, fuck…” he groaned before you leaned down, pulling him into the first kiss you’ve shared in a day and a half. You moaned into it as you started to near your peak, finally able to chase it after all the time spent putting it off to deal with his attitude. “Gonna cum- Cooper…!” you moaned into the crook of his neck and that was his undoing. You hid your face into his neck as your walls squeezed him tight, your orgasm washing over you like a tidal wave. Your legs shook as his hips bucked up into you, trying to work the both of you through your high as he pumped you full.

What he wasn’t expecting was you to keep moving, earning an almost pained groan from him as you ground yourself against him. “I never gave you permission to cum inside me” you stated, apparently he wasn’t out of the dog house just yet. He was plotting how he would get you back for this on another day, how he’d wreck you and make you remember just who it is you’re doing this to. You smirked as you had the wonderful idea of giving him a taste of his own medicine. “Perk about it bein’ a minute? I can go all night” you teased as you set that steady pace once more, needing more, needing to feel him after being so long without. His hands gripped the bed posts, white knuckled as he hissed through his teeth from the overstimulation. “You are one evil woman, ya know that?” He asked playfully, making you chuckle. “Don’t act like you don’t fuckin’ love it” you replied, and he certainly couldn’t argue with you there, not when it felt this good. “You can give me one more, can’t you sweetie?” You asked in a sickly sweet tone, using the same line he’d always use on you anytime he’d overstimulate the hell out of you just to see the faces you make and hear your moans. He recognized that line, making him grunt and groan as you moved your hips. “Fuck…” was all he could get out, mind foggy of any thoughts, just how good your walls felt as they massaged his dick. Maybe he should piss you off more often. “Look at those pretty faces, you like this, don’t you?” you asked, making him damn near whimper at your tone and he never does that shit. You gave an evil laugh at the pathetic sound. “Oh you sweet thing, I’m gonna fuckin’ ruin you” you said, leaning down and biting into his shoulder as you picked up the pace a little bit, earning a lewd groan from him. You laved your tongue over the spot, watching it heal instantly before sitting back up, fully seating yourself on him. You reached behind you to cup and fondle his balls, moving your hips back and forth to grind your clit against him to both work you to your end. “C’mon baby, give it to me. I can tell you’re almost there” you said, making him tilt his head back at all the feelings you were giving him, it was too much yet not enough all at once and it was torture. Your free hand came to his cheeks, pulling his head down to face you. “Eyes on me” you ordered, and his eyes looked into yours for a moment before flitting down to where your bodies were connected, giving a groan when he’d see himself disappear and reappear slightly and the way his cum was sticking to your thighs and his lower stomach. “Cooper…” you moaned softly once more, that was almost always your sign, the way you’d sigh his name so deliciously paired with your walls milking him for everything he could give you drove him mad. “Cum with me honey” you pleaded, and felt as his hips bucked up into you three or four times before you both were sent over the edge once more, a cacophony of moans slipping from both of you as he spilled inside of you and you came on his cock.

After laying there for a few minutes, enjoying the peaceful after glow of your orgasms, you sat up, accidentally seating yourself fully on his dick again and he gave a pained groan. “Not again…” he whined, making you laugh as your hands came to the rope binding his wrists. “Relax, I’m just undoin’ ya. I’m mean, but not that mean” you said through giggles. “You okay though? I know I was really rough but I didn’t go too far…did I?” You asked skiddishly, a complete 180 of the attitude you had just moments ago and it made him laugh. “Wasn’t expectin’ it outta you sweetheart but I’d be a damn liar if I said I didn’t like it. I’m alright, you did good” he assured, making you relieved as you laid on top of him, littering his lips, cheeks, neck, shoulder, and chest with kisses as his hands rested on your back and hips. “I love you Coop. Even when ya piss me off, you’re still the only person in this god forsaken wasteland I could ever see myself with” you spoke, making him chuckle. “I love you too, sweetheart. ‘m sorry for makin’ you upset, wasn’t right. But I’d say you did a damn good job of puttin’ me in my place” he said, making you giggle. “No hard feelings?” You asked, looking at him with eyes that held so much worry for one person, eyes that held so much care. His hand came to the back of your head, pulling you into a loving kiss. “Never” he said into it, pressing his forehead against yours after you both parted for air. You gave a contented hum, happy for things to be all right again. “Remind me to piss you off more often, you got a good swing on ya” he said, breaking the peaceful silence with a grin, making you laugh. “Please don’t, I like moments like this so much more. I hate bein’ mad at you, love you too much” you replied, making him kiss the top of your head, wondering what he ever did to deserve someone like you.

“C’mon, let’s get ya cleaned up and get some RadAway in ya, don’t wanna ruin that perfect skin just yet” he said, making you giggle once more but it was cut off by a hiss as he moved you off from his softened dick, grabbing a wet rag and cleaning you both up as he got the IV started. He kissed your head once more, holding your hand like he always did as you got the needle in, got it all hooked up and a good flow going, coming back to sling his arm around you and hold you to him. Between the warmth of his body and the comfort of the bed, you couldn’t help but let your eyes flutter shut, a soft smile resting on your lips as you fell asleep peacefully against him. You always felt safe when you were with him, no matter where you were, and he’d always protect you no matter what. And that, is what love in post apocalypse looked like, he swore it.

#fallout smut #fallout #fallout x reader #cooper howard smut #cooper howard x reader #cooper howard #the ghoul smut #the ghoul x reader #the ghoul

[sarahs-secrets2]

Silent Treatment NSFW 18+ ˋ♡ˊ

light and dark series MINORS DNI 18+

₊°✧︡ ˗ ˏ ˋ ♡ ˎˊ ˗

You were locked in a stalemate. Leon and you had gotten into a silly argument, truly over nothing, but neither of you were willing to budge. Which was why both of you sat silently in your shared bed, angrily watching some random movie that droned on. Despite how badly you both wanted each other at this moment, it had become a waiting game to see who would speak up first and admit it. Leon was obviously frustrated, stealing glances trying to read you, trying to decipher what you were thinking. Your eyes avoided him but you could feel his gaze burning through you.

“Can I change the tv?” he stole another glance as he finally broke his silence. You scoffed, attempting to ignore him and rile him up a bit more. This had turned into much more than the aftermath of an argument, now you were giving Leon the full-on silent treatment. “You gonna say anything?” he sounded pissed, the sternness of his voice echoed in your ears.

Taking it up a notch, you fully turned over in bed so your back faced him. If he wanted to make it up to you, he would have to work for it. Leon let out a dry chuckle, the frustration building up inside him as you toyed with your newfound power. The bed sank as Leon made his way over towards you. He pressed himself up against your back, propping himself up on his elbow as he drew lines down your arm. 

“Silent treatment huh?” You didn't answer, just let out a deep breath. Leon wasn't going to give up that easily. He brushed your hair to the side, lips connecting to your neck as he began placing sloppy kisses along your jaw. Kisses turned into more as a faint purple tinge began to appear on your neck, and fuck did it feel good. You wanted to speak up and encourage Leon, but you couldn't let him have that satisfaction. Your lips trembled as you attempted to stifle a moan. Leon was quick to pick up on this, shifting over and tugging you off your side and to lay on your back. 

“Still want to stay quiet?” he was giving you an opportunity, but you were too stubborn to give into a few kisses, he would need to do more than that. Leon nodded as he shifted back onto his knees. His hands grabbed the back of your calves, slightly pushing your legs up so they were bent. Once he had you the way he wanted, he positioned himself in between your legs, his hardened dick brushing against your inner thigh. A chill ran up your spine, senses heightened as you anticipated his next move. 

Leon lowered himself down, placing a hand mere inches from your face to support his weight. His other hand was busy trailing up and down your body, teasing you. Almost instinctively one of your legs wrapped around him, drawing him closer to you as you ached for him. Your eyes closed, relishing the feeling of his hands on you. Leon knew exactly how to turn you on. His face was buried in the crook of your neck, leaving more hickeys until he finally made his way up to your lips. 

Excitement bubbled as you were finally ready to taste him until he stopped. His lips grazed yours, noses brushing as he hovered waiting for you to make a move. Your eyes were locked on his, mind racing as your body urged to have him. “Please Leon, I need you." Your voice was faint as the words you had been holding in all night finally tumbled out.

Leon smirked, realizing you finally spoke, breaking the silent treatment he had been getting. “Only because you used your words and asked so nicely.”

₊°✧︡ ˗ ˏ ˋ ♡ ˎˊ ˗

i want to make this longer, part 2? fluff version

taglist: @jamespottersdaisy @grnherbs @un-bandit @secretsthathauntus @sageslittlelibrary @ritualwriting @hermizery

#leon kennedy #leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy re4 #leon kennedy x you #leon scott kennedy x reader #re4 remake #resident evil x reader #resident evil #leon s kennedy #leon s kennedy x reader #leon scott kennedy #leon kennedy resident evil #re4 leon #resident evil leon #leon kennedy smut