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doctor-plagueis · 3 years

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RWBY Booty Tier List

Hi I said it would happen so now it's gonna happen, time to rate asses and explain why I gave them that rating...

(also they are in order from flattest to phattest)

[This took way too long (T-T) ]

Starting with D TIER Aka Flat as fuck

Raven: Ya go to the lowest tier in D tier ya all-tits-no-ass having ass, you deadbeat fucko (I really don't like parents who leave their children, how'd you guess?).

Weiss : Sorry girl but even with all your dance training, your Sperm donor's DNA is in you, if it was just your mom's DNA you'd rocket up to A TIER, still more ass than Raven tho, which says a lot about Raven since Weiss is as flat as a wooden plank (sorry @naughtyweiss your girl has no ass).

All of team NDGO: these bitches show up once or twice, and, in the novels they do something bad? I didn't read it, but they like sacrifice some people to the Grimm or something? Anyways they have almost no ass too little to actually matter.

C TIER Aka Too much muscle

Pyrrha : Sorry unbeatable girl your life style is just too healthy, with all her exercises and no fat foods she has no cushioning, I'm sorry Pyrrha you just have too much muscle.

Reese : With all her skating she must have some muscle in the back, like literally, her muscles are trained to keep her on the board during combat so her ass is super firm, but that's a bit of a downside since it's too firm, kinda hard actually like really hard.

Also she gives me party animal girl vibes, that doesn't affect anything just thought I'd mention it.

Elm: Have you seen how tall and beefy that girl is? Now does this affect her backside...mmm...kind of? Her ass is just and, I mean just muscle which is bad because no cushioning.

But her thighs tho mm~mm delicious.

Yang : Yang is all about her upper body, she's proud of her tits and her arms, she is Miss "punch first ask later" after all, so i can actually see her skipping some leg days, like Reese her booty is alot of muscle but not so much cushion, sorry Yang.

Arslan : Like Yang, Arslan is all about working out and honing her body to peak physical fighting ability, however, this girl has genetics on her side, her tits aren't as big as Yang’s however, she make up for having a tentsy little bit of cushion for the pushin' not really enough to be B TIER though.

B TIER Aka Now were gettin' good

Penny Ver.2 : Penny Version 1 was pure metal (at least in my headcanon) so she was all legs no butt, however, Penny Version 2 (again in my headcanon) had synthetic skin, now I'm not saying Pietro is some weird pervert giving his child a fat ass, but he was "generous" which was inaccurate as...

Penny (human) : Penny as a human never had the chance to exercise [fuck you RT (T-T)], so her booty was a little lacking but it was still bigger and rounder than her robot body.

Ruby: Now you and I both know that with all the sweets Ruby eats she isn't exactly thin, good thing though is all the fat goes to her ass, Ruby has that fatty y'all!

Neo : I'm sure people will question this one but, Neo's height is a detrement on her ass, since she's so short her ass has to be proportional to her actual height, so for women her height she has so much ass but compared to the others in this list it isn't as much.

Coco: Coco takes care of her fashion and her body. She does squats often and keeps a balance between fat and firmness. Unfortunately genetics gave her a cute face but not a phat ass, sorry queen.

Summer: Same as Ruby except she has that MILFY boost to her hips and booty (she also has bigger tits but, oh well this isn't the Titty Tier list so...).

Winter : Training for the military helped null the taint of Jacques DNA in her, so she took a bit more of her mother’s blessed genes, her ass isn't exactly impressive like the girls in A TIER but it's nothing to scoff at either, unlike her sister (sorry Weissey).

Miltiades "Miltia" : both sisters wear heels, however, Miltia has bigger boobs than her twin while Mel has a bigger booty, still wearing heels and being as acrobatic as they both are requires a lot of lower body training, and also since they work at a club as security they do know how to seduce people, and that did affected their rating.

A TIER Aka Nearly perfectly fuckable

Harriet : Now to be one hundred percent honest Harriet has more thighs than ass, however, with her focus on speed and the training she does, she must have a nice fuckable ass, not the biggest or roundest but really, really nice.

Melanie: Both sisters are guards for Junior's club, but, I like to think that Mel also works as a Stripper or Lap dancer (Hooker if you got enough to buy her services and have a dick big enough, she's a bit of a size queen), so she worked on making her already fat ass even better and also took the time to hone her sex appeal, those being her twerking and lapdancing.

Velvet : Bunny gal has some phat Bunny Buns if ya catch my meaning, like go back to volume 3 and get a good look at her costume, girl's got hips and ass like she was bred for it!

Willow: Have you seen her in the newest volumes?? She has a chance (admittedly small) against the legendary bellabooties Gahtdayum!

Too bad she wasted it with a nearly sterile fucking shit pile of a human like Jacques, ugh... (How he managed to have 3 children baffles me, must've taken half the world’s supply of Viagra)

[Side note our favorite Schnee femboy took after his mom, if he was on the list he'd be just below Harriet hehe].

A+ TIER Candidates for the Bubble Booty Brigade (BBB)

Glynda : Glynda is a professional huntress, she is a teacher and she's decked out in dominatrix gear, can I make it any clearer?

Salem : Salem is the original MILF, the thiccest witch of remnant , and also, she has magic and is technically a monster girl sooo... that gives her extra points (who would've guessed I like monster girls hehe).

The next entry might be blasphemous for some and for that I apologize but...

Blake and Kali : I'm sorry kitties, even though the belabooties are know world wide they are not yet in the BBB. Blake has the firmer booty because of her time in the Fang but Kali has the MILF bonus.

Because of their similarities and their diferences they tie for top of A+ tier.

S TIER The BUBBLE BOOTY BRIGADE

The three heavenly asses of remnant, only three girl stand a top the mountain of the perfect Bubble Booty and they are in order...

May Zedong : May has been depicted by the fandom as being really curvy, especially the cow udders she calls breasts, however she hides her curves under her clothes. The same applies to the fucking badonk she hides in her baggy pants, so much so in fact, that May should be number two of the BBB but because she's so shy about her body she's demoted to number three, still, being a member of the Brigade is a blesing of itself.

Emerald Sustrai : As stated in the previous entry Em should be number three, but because May is so shy and Emerald isn't they swaped places. Em is number two because of one singular thing, she knows her ass is her best atribute, and she fucking flaunts it, she knows she can make men and futas pitch tents, and make women stare like horndogs just by walking past them. Not only that, but she wear clothes that accentuate her ass from short shorts to miniskirts, she knows how to make anyone undeserving cream themselves just by swaying her hips a little and winking. Her seduction skills boosted her above everyone else except one.

NORA VALKYRIE THE ONE TRUE BUBBLE BOOTY OF REMNANT

Every single step a jiggle, every single jump or tiny hop and the world stops to stare, every time she passes by jaws hit the floor, every man woman and futa either wants Nora or wants to be Nora.

Nora's voluptuous cheeks are legendary and the worst part of it all is: She does know the effect she has on people, and she gives zero shits about it.

Because no one is worthy of her divine ass cheeks, except for two men: Jaune Arc and Lie Ren.

She's found her studs the ones who care for her, love her, give her the world AND the ones who have huge bitch breaking cocks to fuck her into the sheets like rutting animals.Every.Single.Night.

Every day of her life is one big teasing session for her studs, she purposefully wear skirts just short enough to see the glorious bounce, she always finds excuses to bend over, she sits on their laps as often as possible.

Just so she can have the mind blowing three ways she has every night.

All hail Booty Queen Nora Valkyrie.

Now everyone thank you for being patient this was something i spent a few days writing (like 3-4 days) and I only wrote this for that time so I hope y'all like it.

Some chacters are missing I know, but I really am comfortable with how it is now.

As always this SHOULD NOT AFFECT YOUR WRITING.

This was a thought experiment of mine, and like I always say in this sort of thing WRITE HOW YOU WANT TO WRITE I hope this was clear.

Thanks for reading and please if you so desire share it with friends.

But for now see ya!

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zumpietoo · 3 years

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Riverdale won't return until July, but writer Evan Kyle knows just what to tease to keep us hanging on during this cruel hiatus. During The Dipp's Riverdale Clubhouse on April 1, Kyle teased that a huge, life-changing hostage situation in the back half of Riverdale Season 5. And, um, it's pretty major to say the least.

In our exclusive chat, which also featured @nocontextrvd's Macy Jones, Kyle revealed that Veronica and Archie's budding reunion will be hit with yet another roadblock when Riverdale returns, and this one's going to be a lot more dangerous than Chad's financial blackmail. Of course, this isn't going to be the first problem the two have endured. Their entire relationship has been complicated — whether it be communication issues, Hiram issues, bear issues, Barchie issues, Hiram issues again, these two know roadblocks.

But the return of the show may bring forth the most difficult obstacle yet in their relationship. The last we saw, Veronica and Archie were going to give it another go. Veronica was getting out of her marriage with Chad and Archie was essentially running the entire town of Riverdale. They're a power couple, and no one can stand in their way. Unless you're Chad, who lied about signing the divorce papers after luring Ronnie back to New York City and admitting that he got both himself and Veronica into a very sticky investment scheme that could bring them both down if they go through with the split.

So where does that leave us? Well, Veronica is staying in New York for a "few days" to deal with this new development, as we saw in the midseason finale. But that may be the least of her worries. When asked about what fans can expect when the show returns in July, Kyle said, "There's a hostage situation that is going to affect Varchie... It's going to affect all our characters." To paraphrase Jones, we're "freaking out a little bit."

Riverdale has done hostage situations before — in the midseason finale, Betty, Alice, and the twins were held hostage in their home by Charles and Chic. But something about this tease seems different. Those hostage situations have been relatively low-stakes, with minimal ramifications on the larger storyline. But Kyle promised that this would "affect all our characters," suggesting that this will be a potentially series-altering moment.

Obviously, my first question upon hearing that there will be a hostage situation is who is the hostage taker? Given that Varchie appears to be the main target/the most affected by this event, my money's on Chad, Veronica's Wolf of Wall Street wannabe husband. Not only is he a liar who is blackmailing Veronica into staying in their marriage, he's also got some major anger issues and probably tried to kill Veronica in a murder-suicide helicopter crash. The odds of him losing it this season and doing something drastic, like holding someone hostage, are extremely high.

The other main suspect is Riverdale's forever Big Bad, Hiram Lodge. However, Kyle also promised that this hostage situation would "definitely affect Hiram's plan going forward," which is why I suspect Hiram won't be behind it. Why would the hostage situation affect his plans if he's the one planning it in the first place? And let's just say Veronica is the one held hostage, could Hiram possibly find his heart and help save his daughter?

Teasing the rest of the season, Kyle also told The Dipp's Clubhouse listeners, "Finding Jughead will not be easy," and said that Season 5 will introduce "a lot of mystery behind our own characters, not only the Lonely Highway Killer." I smell the return of TBK, and maybe even the reveal of the Bughead voicemail that's been torturing us all season long.

Umm.....it is not remotely "major", last ep had TWO/arguably 3 hostage situations and I'm not remotely sure why I'm meant to GAF if Hymen loses $$$ or Vermin is "in peril".

TBF, my guess is Hymen gives up Plaiderdale (or something) and Chaddiekins controls shit for an ep or two----or at least that's the only way it "affects everybody". And, again, ummm....holding somebody hostage to extort somebody else is very much a crime. And your fruits from such a crime would be null and void, because "coercion"---tho given Plaiderdale's "twists", Daddykins colluded with Chaddiekins, cuz he does (understandably, TBF) hate Douchie....

Speaking of, naturally VD shippers (who are Vermin fans first, supposedly) were thrilled by Barfie Evan....you know, a LIAR, who routinely teases shit that not only "doesn't happen that way", frequently doesn't, period....

Buuuutt....they're all excited cause VD 4EVAH!!! We always win!! Woo Hoo!!! They always are together!!!

Except, they aren't....he fucked her "best friend" in seekrit and she just cheated on him (which I do get her)...and, he was a complete dick just cause she has to stay there for a few more days.

Sooo....if you're a Vermin stan, why TF do you want her with that asshole? I don't even LIKE Vermin, but I think she still deserves better than that.

In fact, even with Barfies, where you ship it cause Betty is a reward for Douchie (being a jackass, apparently merits nice presents) and he's your fave, I remain, endlessly.....WHY????

Dude is a fugly asshole, endlessly fucking over everybody he sees. We're told he's amazing, but it doesn't change that he's actually a colossal dick (tho he, apparently, has a tiny one)....

So, honestly, open invitation....why do you love him?

And, while you're at it....why do you love current Betty? Cause she's a gross cuntwipe.

Oh and to the article, again....nobody GAF about the fucking VM, you twat.

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survivorwesteros · 7 years

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Episode 7: I feel personally victimized - Luke

why are they abaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaackkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

also steffen or drew will win this season bookmark this.

I can't Beloeve

So glad to be back in the game! The amount of shock in the chat was awesome! Hahah I'm just glad I didn't get eliminated without receiving a single vote. Although I know I'll get one now!

First of all I feel personally victimized by the hosts for allowing people to come back. Next I feel personally victimized because Darian came back and he has reason to target me!!! Going forward I'm trusting Drew the most because I love him so much :) Ashley, Steffen and Jordan are also strong allies of mine. I want to target Darian next and then I want either Brian, Lily or Andrew out. Jordan should leave fairly soon too because he's a big threat and that means betraying him but I need to do what I need to do to win.

So I got some kick ass items at auction today. I got a Wildfire, which can reset a round and make all of our challenge results null so we have to do them over. I also got a ride on a dragon thanks to Steffen, even though we don't know about it yet. He got to choose two others to take with him and chose Drew and I, which I really awesome because I am starting to like Steffen a lot. Hopefully we can get closer in the upcoming days. I also got a turkey leg, which gives me an advantage in a challenge up to final five, so that is pretty chill too.

Darian and Lily coming back????? UGLY!!!! KEEP THEM!!!!!!!! But also like I'm rebelling more against the fact of HAVING two people come back than the reality of who they are. If two people were going to come back, they’re DECENT choices because at least they both like me? But they come with their own vendettas against other people I like and it’s a PROBLEMMMMMMM. Darian coming back means the tension between him and Luke is gonna come to a head sooner rather than later. And Lily wants to take out both Andrew and Steffen QUICK because of reasons. Meanwhile WHAT EXACTLY HAS MY ASS BEEN DOING???? Aligning with almost every damn person in the game! Jordan specifically said “i feel like were aligned with too many people at this point. Like we need to actually get on a side” and my internal monologue is laughing because I think I’m connected to even more than he is because I’m with Steffen too????

1. Me Ashley Jordan Darian 2. Me Ashley Luke Steffen 3. Me Ashley Andrew 4. Me Ashley Andrew Luke Jordan 5. Me Jordan Lily

I’m about one second away from starting one with Brian and Nic just for shits. And THEY’RE ALL FUCKING TARGETING EACH OTHER!!!! Luke and Steffen bonded on call over wanting Darian gone and have brought up Jordan’s name, Jordan and Lily want Steffen gone, Lily is PUSHING for Andrew to go and Jordan and I can only keep her at bay for so long, and LITERALLY NO ONE IS BRINGING UP BRIAN AND NIC TO GO like I’m about to upset a whole group of people really quickly. I think my best course of action right now, if Ashley would be open to it, would be to blindside Darian right the fuck back out. I need to convince Jordan that our five-person alliance (listed above as #4) is the most important thing in the world right now because it’s numbers after this vote. It’s also another alliance that I have with both Ashley and Jordan so if they’re on board for the Darian blindside, then we can do it without pissing anyone off. Except Darian but I mean whatever, it’s not like I have to see him at high school the next day (sorry Ashley!!!). And it keeps Luke happy, and I’m all about keeping Luke happy. And it might convince Brian and Nic that we’d go for Lily next and just cleanse the field, and honestly that’d be nice too.

This is my dream boot list, at least for now (subject to like 18,000 revisions so like take it with the entire container of salt that for some reason is a current Snapchat filter with the Morton’s wig and umbrella)

10th place: Darian, with the consent of Ashley and Jordan 9th place: Brian because whew comp strength 8th place: Steffen because I don’t know that I can hold Jordan and Lily off any longer on that one 7th place: Nic, to, in the words of Lord Voldemort, kill the spare 6th place: Andrew because he might not see it coming at that time? The kid has been to the Citadel so fucking much, I can’t 5th place and beyond I don’t fucking know yet??? That’s a really tough position to be in because everyone in that final five would potentially want to work to the end with me but they’re all also threats to win. Ashley has been a main co-conspirator since the very beginning for me, but walks in with at least Darian’s vote almost pre-destined. Jordan and I work well together and his reputation often works against him, but I honestly think this isn’t the jury that would hold that against him like Costa Rica did, and he would have Ben’s vote almost pre-destined. Lily’s story could go either way, in that she’d been voted out twice, she doesn’t deserve to win, or that she’s fought back in twice and made it to the end. Especially if people like Steffen and Jordan are on jury, that’s going to really resonate with them as people who have won buybacks and almost won with them before. Luke probably has the least amount of connections from that potential jury pool, but has a great story of being the only foreigner and needing to adapt to our schedules, staying up until 4-5am every night to participate with us when we’re at our most available. Steffen would really respond to that, having played seasons from Norway and understanding the struggle. Honestly I could end up with the worst case to present in any configuration of that five, but I’ll worry about that as we get closer because I think that’s the configuration that best LEADS to me getting to finals. I can argue my way through a lot of things, and if I lose, I lose, I’d be happy losing to any of them. This might be the strongest social game I’ve ever had?? Or I could be wildly delusional and other people have just as many chats with just as many leads and I don’t factor into anyone’s final plans. We’ll see, I guess

Pray for me, it’s gonna be a fucking bumpy ride.

So Steffen, Drew and I's dragon ride ended with me getting a vote revealer, Drew getting an advantage in a challenge of his choosing, and Steffen got a vote stealer. We all agreed to it and are now in a semi alliance. So this should be interesting.

So I won immunity yay :) Sam got mad at me cause she spent a long time making that challenge and I beat it in 8 minutes so i felt bad and decided to make an actual confessional. Shocking right? Anyways even if I didnt have immunity I think Im in a good spot? like okay, so i have a lot of alliances. I have one with Andrew Drew Luke and Ashley, one with Drew Ashley and Darien, One with Lily and Drew and then i sort of have an alliance with Nic. Meaning I am not aligned with Steffen, meaning ideally Steffen goes. lily told me she has the power to take away someones immunity so thats good that thats on my side. Either way, things are good for Jordan. First confessional done, dont expect another

me to jordan yesterday: lets vote out steffen lily to me today: i was thinking steffen for next tribal

ok sooo i do think steffen is a big threat and could win but i feel bad about voting him out cause im not invested in this game and idk if he is but he could win so i feel guilty if i vote him out and stay over him r . i. o. p. in peace

well well wel......... this is perfect. darian came to me wanting to blindside a threat so i said drew and now he's doing all the work to get drew sent home :o i spoke to steffen abotu it and hes good and darians gonna try to get andrew/brian/ashley so hopefully that works.

i have a really good feeling where this is the episode where my edit goes from INV to MOR3

HONESTLYYYYYYYYYYY disregard the boot list, scrap it, move on from it, delete the confessional, it NEVER. HAPPENED.

Lily has gone to Drew, Jordan, Darian and Ashley to try and get me out. Ashley and Darian came clean to me about it and now we’re sorting stuff out now. darian thing lets him see a random alliance chat don’t like it. Lily is after me, then Brian, then Andrew. Drew has an idol from the citadel so now we’re strategizing. trying to spill that Luke wanted Brian gone. Lily has Drew and Jordan but only Jordan. Nic has to vote Drew. Drew might have to self vote Brian has to vote lily Andrew will vote lily Darian votes Drew Steffen votes lily Ashley votes lily Lily votes SteffenJordan votes Steffen Luke votes TBA

so Luke came to me with Jordan tea about how now Jordan is voting me out well good job Lily I officially say you can choke now [17:46:00] Luke: So do we know what's happening yet?

[17:46:08] Jordan (Westeros): no one is talking [17:46:19] Jordan (Westeros): if i didn’t have immunity id be freaking out [17:47:15] Luke: That's why I'm freaking out!! [17:47:23] Jordan (Westeros): i want to target steffen tbh [17:49:39] Luke: Oh wow really? You think that could work? [17:49:49] Jordan (Westeros): i think we could potentially get the voes [17:49:51] Jordan (Westeros): votes

So screw you Lily, and Jordan next time you go behind my back, be a little more creative you little toad and as soon as Jordan tried to get me to vote out Andrew IM LIKE SURE but then sent those receipts to andrew also I might now have Luke voting out Lily

[11/30/16, 6:42:48 PM] Brian: [2016-11-30, 11:38:39 AM] Brian: have you heard anything about the vote today? [2016-11-30, 12:19:23 PM] Lily Owen: Yeah, people are planning on Steffen [11/30/16, 6:42:59 PM] Steffen Bøhn: oh yeah [11/30/16, 6:42:59 PM] Brian: [2016-11-30, 6:42:13 PM] Brian: so idk [2016-11-30, 6:42:13 PM] Jordan Pines: no one has said it to me [2016-11-30, 6:42:17 PM] Jordan Pines: ive heard steffen so far [2016-11-30, 6:42:22 PM] Jordan Pines: and i think thats where I’m leaning

I GOT BRIAN SENDING ME SHIT NOW AW HELL YAS

So I am terrified for this upcoming tribal. Some shit is going to go down. After the auction there are so many items in this game that I can't even keep my head straight.

So Darian got approached by Lily, who said she wanted to get Steffen out. She had this whole hit list and whatnot, and stupidly told Darian a lot of crap. So basically he comes to me and tells me everything. So now we are working with Steffen to try and find a solution... Hopefully all of this stuff is true, because if not, who the hell knows who is leaving tonight.

#youwinoryoudie

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