#but now i cant even see him in person | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

yrsonpurpose · 22 days

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lust. for power.

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extra-somethin-somethin · 1 month

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If nothing else Koenma is a Kuwabara stan and I'm right there with him o7 (I need to write the kuwameshi fic that goes with this fr)

#maybe one day i'll write that au i have sitting in my head #ever since the comment he made about making kuwa spirit detective instead ive been thinking about it #like...what if yusuke is still recruited same as canon but like #kuwa was already spirit detective? doing assignments for the guys upstairs and all #and they made yusuke help him after his resurrection instead of going solo #and it's hilarious because they still have the ''rivalry'' set in place so it's like #now i gotta be coworkers with this guy i was in a fist fight with last week?#yusuke is like you can't be serious you want me to fight DEMONS with the guy who cant even beat ME? lmaooo okay #kuwa would be more in tune with his powers atp in this au and super offended like hello #why would i use my reiki on a FELLOW HUMAN CHILD you DICK i can hold my own on my assignments just fine #but he's actually really excited to be able to spend time with yusuke doing something besides getting his ass handed to him #they're both genkai's students (she's endlessly annoyed but they grow on her)#i just think it'd be fun cos like #it'd be harder to exclude kazuma from shit if he's literally been involved in this shit before he even met #kurama and hiei #kuwabara isn't really told about yusuke's resurrection so things go mostly the same up til he's brought back #they're both called to koenma's office and it's the spiderman pointing meme 💀#it's koenma's first time seeing kuwa in person as he usually just sends assignments with botan #yusuke has already seen him cos of the resurrection arc #and koenma is SUCH a fanboy ''kuwabara it's such a pleasure. you know you're my best worker 🥺''#''um urameshi am i seeing things or is that a fuckin baby'' yusuke will NOT stop laughing #it fucks koenma up so bad he makes sure he's in his adult form when he's around kuwa next #cos he wants to be the respected boss but also guy that you can chill with!! he's so cringe #okay yeah i need to write this it's such a fun concept #kuwameshi #yu yu hakusho #kuwabara kazuma #yusuke urameshi #koenma

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itsdefinitely · 4 months

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richie really wanted to be max's friend. he really wanted to be max's friend. he. he wanted to be max's friend. nobody talk to me i'm having a moment

#not even michie im just. woag. i.#man.#definite's ted talks #richie lipschitz #max jagerman #nerdy prudes must die #hatchetfield #im supposed to be drawing or writing right now but i cant get rhis out of my head. richie really wanted to bw max's friend #do you think he transferred from another school and - not knowing about jagerman - introduced himsekf to max #and max pushed him into a locker and called him a nerd #do you think they were best friends before fourth grade and richie really wants that back :(#do you think that richie was the only person that could see the good in max before the waylon incident #do you think. because im thinking #also sidenote: ship names in this fandom are really funny #jagertitty? jagerschitz? what next. spankman?#okay sidenote over #do you think richie was the only person to actually earnestly want to be max's friend

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wildstar25 · 1 month

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MiqoMarch Day 18 - Snow

When your partner has been trained to strike from behind, it's best not to loose sight of her.

#miqomarch #miqomarch2024 #ffxiv #g'raha tia #y'shtola rhul #wolgraha #wolshtola #y'shtola x wol #WOL posting #Arsay Nun #ffxiv gpose #arsay cant help but sneak and be silly #tbh arsay is really not a big fan of ishgard #for one its cold and shes not a big fan #thankfully shes got proper cold weather gear now which is what you see here #two: even though the fortemps gladly welcome her into their home she still just doesnt feel right being there #despite how long its been and even if shes sorta made peace with it shes always going to carry some guilt over what happened in the vault #BUT G'raha said he wanted to see it proper so she will bite her tongue and go with him #she'll just also happen to slink off and help the first person she sees after showing g'raha around the upper city levels #a mere coincidence surely #graha so handsome in that third shot imo #i know im biased but shhh

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oatbugs · 2 months

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my research partner and i are huddled in a blanket in paddington waiting for a too-late train i already miss you and you and you

#he keeps falling asleep almost on my shoulder and waking up and readjusting but i want to tell him its ok weve seen a lot #of each other ive seen your brainwaves you called me crying a few nights ago. research partner right now is a potentiality #friend is a certainty. i met a banker passionate about finance. he said his advice made the lives of others better and he likes the numbers #more than he likes anything else. on a high rise near canary wharf the view was wonderful and the people even moreso #he said i loved her but i spent 33 grand on her and i cant do this anymore. his voice cracked talking about her. he did love her.#and she talked softly she grabbed my hand she bought me a pack of Marlborough gold she told me to snap #the russian menthol cigarettes of the tortured polish man near us with my teeth i kept staring at her teeth #bright white and sharp. i couldnt find her heartbeat but i did find warmth and i did find her lips and i did feel #how she felt pressed against a wall. a pretty boy held my hand and i gave him my number. i couldnt stop smiling about her no matter #how many runways youve walked on how many collections youve designed how many students youve taught. senior lecturer teaches me how to do #very unethical things ethically over a double shot of vodka made by the half-persian with broken farsi. she talks softly #and she says her eyes are hazel but they appear a shade of red. pure gold on her hands and leather on her back and her fingers on my lips #(she talks softly sees through me she says something i cant hear but i wont forget the way she flies) she talked to my research partner #about the possibility of moving to sunny dubai with the rest of her family and my heart felt pierced. on her arm i traces a tattoo of a #knife passing through a rose. she told me she thought there was romance in severing so i kissed her some more.#he sat me down and asked me what i loved and i told him and he said no romance no person no tragedy will take that from you.#the room was filled with a collection of people in love with something that wasnt a person and i kept looking at her.#red eyes bitten jawline beautiful hands. it is 3 degrees Celsius my head is on his shoulder i miss my friends #we walked out the lecture hall with arms linked a photo of two years ago and we both said #jesus christ. i miss you all. and i miss logic metatheory lectures. im glad i get to stare at the depth of your eyes #i wish i had met you years ago.#crushposting

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puhpandas · 2 months

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I change how I feel about Gregory and Tony's relationship ten thousand times a day

#like i dont even think theyd get together if tony was how he was in ggy #gregory wouldnt work to fix him or something hed hate him for being mean to ellis #its why all my beckory stuff i always imagine is in a specific scenario both when theyve been through stuff #and also after like years have passed and theyre 14/15 #AND most importantly tony has had the chance to become a better person and make up with ellid #i think there cant be beckory without ellis #all the stuff ive made for them save for like rabbit burrow i feel doesnt match how i see them in my head #i don't even know how i feel about gregory in a romantic relationship still #idc about it when hes 12 and doesnt have 3 star fam yet but ive alqays seen it in a beckory dtance #as it being good that gregory can think about romance now because he got what he needed most already #but atill.#hes just such a family guy #but i really do like the beckory ship #its so interesting #idk ive changed my mind a lot and havent made enough stuff of them to keep up #with how i see them nowadays #i want to fix that #also i think i feel like the beckody stuff ive made feels shallow because #if its in a scenario where a lot of stuff has happened to get them to that point #and none of that stuff is shown and you dont see them chance #they just feel like randomly completely different people #idk im trying to muster up writing that multichapter ive been wanting to write #and sovereign is pretty much abandonded only because it wasnt working out at all #and ive truly taken everything good from that fic and added it to this new concpet #that made both seperate ideas better #so its a good thing #after the week im gonna try and recharge my writing battery #since the great ipad explosion of 2024 and scrambling to finish the week kinds fried my brain #i miss writing💔#and also wanna explore this new fic concpet im absolutely in love with

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kil9 · 7 months

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everyone agrees that the patriarchy teaches men to hide their emotions, and that this is a bad thing, so why is it that when men actually show an emotion everyone jumps to call him an abuser or manipulator or whatever :\

#99.txt #im so sick of this #you all have no faith in people. you just see the word boyfriend or he pronouns and go !!ABUSER!! DUMP HIM! and dont see how there could be #any negative reprocusions of that................#i still cant forget that ANONYMOUS message where someones boyfriend was worried they were cheating. & the person who got the ask was like #''wow HE'S definitely the one cheating.''#on an ANONYMOUS message ????? how could you possibly say that with confidence with ZERO information ?#some guy was worried and thats what you have to say ????? and you act like you have no hand in men supressing themselves ?#someone who might have had mental health problems or have been cheated on before and been hurt. like.#whoa call me a red flag or whatever for saying this but. no one would say that if it was a woman ! no one !#we all have a hand in society and we all have a hand in the patriarchy and if you dont get your head out of your ass and wise up #then ur just gona get more people hurt #i know circumstances are different sometimes but you actually DO need to consider how you would feel if the tables were turned !!!!#if you still feel the same thats fine ! it was a good thought exercise !!!#but you need to consider these things even if they are uncomfortable to you 🤨 in order to challenge your mind #this is how we get those bullshit ''crying is a manipulation tactic 🥺'' takes #im SICK OF IT !!!!!! everyone use your brain NOW !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#stop assuming everyone is the worst person NOW !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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axemetaphor · 11 months

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this evening's thought: thinking about how john is So attached to dave that he gave dave a role in his band, presumably as an excuse to get him to actually attend their concerts, despite dave having 0 musical capacity and, seemingly, not wanting to have any musical capacity, and also not being made to play an instrument but just... doing something really stupid on stage then fucking off for the rest of it. fully believe if john could physically lift dave he would just drag that man with him everywhere

#'i was the guy who fell down and died at the start' that whole thing #i think a lot about john and his attachment issues and how even though daves the closest person to him he still cant let dave fully know hi #how when dave starts pushing him away during book1 john just starts showing up on his doorstep--i think unannounced iirc #just arriving with a playstation and 2 controllers like 'hi :] we're going to hang out now'#i like to take the interpretation that john really does want to let dave in more but is both unable to know how to do so #and scared of actually doing so #because obviously john's got so many problems--so many more than he lets on. i mean pargin apparently describes john as a tragic figure #and i can totally fucking see it man #anyways. yknow. yeah.#jdate #rambles.txt #john dies at the end

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lbhslefttiddie · 1 year

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then and now

#svsss #arts #backlog #shen yuan #shen jiu #luo binghe #you may be thinking: hey is that yqy over there? yes #why does he look like a salaryman?? because yqy is a sims 2 character trapped in the vessel of a student council president. next question #hey levanna what the fuck is going on here?? you know what. not even im 100% on that one chief #i had some vague notions about a murder mystery featuring a lbh who could see ghosts #and the ghost of a boy who has been stuck in his old friends' haunt (lol) for oh i dont know. thirty years #but see the thing is that sy doesnt know why he's here either!#he doesnt even remember dying but. well. he was always a sickly kid. he cant say hes surprised he suddenly kicked it #honestly it was such a mundane occurrence for him it must have been too boring to recall #but lbh spends time with yuan gege and pretty quickly comes to the realization that this is NOT the case #he finds like an old new article and in reality sy was found murdered in this place 30 years ago #and its much for likely that the trauma of the event is why he cant remember his death at all #oh and there was gonna be some drama where lbh suspects sy's now much older twin #who is now a teacher at their old school and a very different person from what sy remembers #but it wasnt sj he's just fucking traumatized by his brother being murdered in what theyd considered their safe place #he hates this school and he hates qi ge who never Really talks to him but is still fucking HERE (also teacher)#but he cant leave either bc he cant let go #and part fo him is still hoping to find answers for what happened back then #anyways i think this premise is all very good and sexy #but levanna's brain frankly was not built for writing murder mysteries #free to a good home if any of you fuckers want it #death #murder

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frecklystars · 8 months

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#vent art #first time drawing starscream in uhhh. hot. hot fucking minute there #i was shaky the entire time but drawing plankton helped a lot. plankton is safe #theyre both my number one main f/os. and idk i feel like... if you're starscream and if ur wife looks at u #and her ptsd is suddenly triggered. well. now she cant look at u anymore. that cant feel good can it #who else knows her and loves her like you do? some loud human-ish lifeform with a long ponytail #he sees you hurting. he sits in that grass with you. and you let him. bc he knows what it's like to miss her too #she doesn't fear him. but she doesn't see him as often. and he misses her terribly just like you do.#just as much as you miss her. even if it's a different kind of yearning. and he's hurting now too on her behalf #and you bond with this. this. pathetic lifeform. and youve become this. this. this... pathetic. pathetic! broken thing!#you know she'll come back you know she'll come back you KNOW IT #because doesn't she find you in every universe? and didn't you make promises? and doesn't she always keep them?#but maybe this universe is too broken and maybe she's too broken. maybe she *can't* come back #she's trying. you know she's trying. you FEEL it. what are you supposed to do in the meantime #you're starscream. you're lord starscream and you're lonely and your starflower can't fucking look at you #to no fault of hers and to no fault of yours. it's just what happened. you're in shock. and you're hurting.#this love still isn't temporary. and you still can't imagine your life without her.#and you wish you could obliterate whoever made her feel so fucking scared of you #fuck the person who dared to hurt that one good thing you ever had #you arent a religious mech but you pray and beg to primus your starflower comes back #because you dont know what youll do if she never does #and frankly. she doesn't either. you were her favorite weren't you? and suddenly you're something feared #you've always wanted to be feared but NEVER by her. she is the last person you'd ever want to be feared by #doesn't she miss your voice? haven't you told her with your own vocalizer how much you love and miss her? why doesn't she hear you anymore?#you don't know it but she is terrified of losing you. but she isn't here to tell you that. is she.#it's just you and this stupid nicely dressed copepod who wants to dominate the fast food industry #while your little starflower is laying in a pink bed in a pink land with pink people. and she's crying over you #throwing herself at universes with brooding men with soft voices. but none of them are ever going to feel as good as you made her feel #she misses you but you don't know it because she. can't. even. fucking. look. at. you.#what do you do. what do you do. do you come back? please come back. this ache in your chest is too fucking much. come. back.

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6-2-aestheticsofhate · 16 days

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oh i thought i could handle this video but i dont think i can

#as a trigger it wasnt even that BAD before. why is it suddenly so much worse?#did i just never notice before?#is my brain finally trying to... i dont know PROCESS what happened?#fuck its been 8 years. its been 8 fucking years since i saw him emaciated in a hospital bed dying of cancer.#and now i cant handle hearing or seeing someone dying in a hospital bed or having cancer #it didnt bother me before. why now. why 8 years later.#death tw #cancer tw #personal #vent #to delete

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scalproie · 4 months

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Domesticated Post-Tekken 2 Era Kazuya is my favorite to think about because this would be so good for him and everyone else but he would have an absolutely miserable time during it

#like I dont think he would REALLY miss the rich ceo lifestyle bc i dont see it as smth he ASPIRES to but as a means to give himself power #if you (jun) somehow manage to convince him that he does not actually NEED power then i think hes adaptable enough to ajust to a humble life #and the whole being rich thing fed into his worst traits #but I think being close to jun all the time would be torture for him bc he would CONSTANTLY be confronted to his own faulty morality #he cant help feeling above other common people bc he endured much more pain and hardships at 5yo than them in a lifestyle-#but he cannot act on his superiority complex about them bc Its Not The Right Thing To Do #he looks at his newborn son and feel *nothing* before feeling frustration and irritation toward *himself*#bc hes smart enough to know he SHOULD be feeling smth #and if he relunctantly admit this to jun she would tell him that if the best he can do (for now) is to not wish or do any harm on jin-#then it is good enough and he should not beat himself up about it (which he doesnt. but he does)#and even jun. she is another person he could lose and he knows deep down he would be happier without her #but being near her bring back to life smth that died years ago at the bottom of that cliff #and he wont admit it but hes scared to lose it again. even if right now its brings him nothing but discomfort and pain #hes not even sure if he *loves* her. and when he asks her whats in it for her. why she stays with him #(not out of self-consciousness but genuine confusion) she just smiles at him because he IS considering the feelings of someone else #like she is so understanding and he genuinely does try and its a really slow healing process #hes still gonna stay a little bit of a prick smug at times but at least he will be immensely more chill out #and even maybe fall in love with jun *jun* down the line. characters that fall in love with each other years into the relationship👍#and his whole exploration of fatherhood with jin. him vaguely recalling smth nice jinpachi (or god forbid. HEIHACHI pre-cliff) did to him #and doing the same to jin out of the blue for the sake of experimentation #and jin's positive reaction making him FINALLY AT LAST feel some tiny tiny thing for his son.#also for all her tree-hugger talk. jun is right meditating in the forest DOES help kaz a lot #anyway. yeah👍#tagging later #tekken

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martyrbat · 2 years

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the man who falls – secret origins (1989)

[ID: Two cropped comic pages of Bruce Wayne as a child after falling into a cave and being ambushed by a swarm of bats. There's multiple narration boxes over the pages:

Page One: a three panel sequence of Bruce being rescued by his father. In the first panel, Bruce is screaming with his eyes squeezed shut in fear. He has his fists clenched in front of him and is wearing a reddish pink turtleneck sweater. The narration says, ‘Again, he shrieked — not in terror, but in despair...’ In the second panel, Thomas Wayne is shown from behind in a low angle. He's wearing a red sweater similar to Bruce and is holding a flashlight as he jerks Bruce into him. Above them is bats surrounding them and the broken wood floors that Bruce fell through. The narration continues, ‘The arm curled around him, muffling his voice, and his cheek rubbed against the rough wool of his father's jacket... He squeezed his eyes shut, willing himself to be away from here—’. In the third panel, they're standing outside. The narration reads, ‘When he opened them, he was in the area behind the mansion, in the pale light of the autumn afternoon, and his father's words pounded at him—’. Thomas is kneeling down in front of Bruce in front of the hole he fell in. He's gripping the child's shoulders as he scolds him, “Idiot! I told you never, never to go off alone. Didn't I? Didn't I?” Martha Wayne is behind them with her hand on the side of her face as she looks at them with relief that Bruce is okay.

Page Two: Martha is defending Bruce as Bruce has his head down. Thomas is still squeezing Bruce's shoulders as Martha tells him, “Thomas, he's frightened.” Thomas replies, “He damn well ought to be. He could have been killed.” Martha replaces Thomas's spot in front of Bruce, kneeling to gently place a hand on his upper arm and using a handkerchief to wipe his forehead. Bruce is standing with his fist still clenched and grimacing as Thomas angrily says, “He's got to learn.” Bruce is shown in a low angle, looking up at his mother with wide eyes. The narration continues, ‘He listened to his father's boots crushing the dead grass, and when he could no longer hear them, he dared to ask:’ “Mommy, was I in hell?” Martha soothes, “No, baby, that was just some old cave. You're safe now,” as she hugs him. His cheek is pressed against hers and she has her eyes closed as Bruce still looks uncertain. END ID]

#once again pushing my 'thomas wayne was a piece of shit' propaganda #tied in with the panel of him hitting bruce #and then the alt timeline where they live and martha expresses concern that her eight year old has an obsession with criminology now #and stopped being talkative or wanting to see some train (his special interest) and thomas says good and that it was worth the scare #and ! being autistic. for me when im emotional all sound is so much louder and more overwhelming #the fact that he waited until he couldnt hear his father walking away before asking his mother if he was in hell....#and being no older than 8 and still waiting. just tensed and taking the verbal lashing and them fighting before speaking up?? yeah.#also think it'll be interesting in the 'bruce is constantly seeing the best in people even shitty people that dont 'deserve' a second #chance or for someone to fully believe they can change. that you do bad things but aren't a bad person. that you can do good and not #be a good person. that its making a choice and that anyone can choose and decide to do better than they were yesterday'#sorta deal yknow?#just the conditioning of forgiveness for something theyre not sorry for and wanting to believe everyone is capable of being good #that traumatized 'mommy was i in hell' like god sorry brucie for the trauma but itll have a payoff in a decade or so trust me kid #also martha?? love her. hes the biggest mama's boy you cant change my mind.#bruce wayne #thomas wayne #martha wayne #baby brucie #crypt's panels #c: secret origins | the man who falls #bruce & martha #bruce's childhood

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bangcakes · 3 months

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.

#so like is the rest of my life just gonna be Yearning from now on NZNXNXJXNXMX #ok maybe not the rest of it. but the forseeable future. god how do ppl do this. how have ppl BEEN doing this.#ignorance is truly bliss like. i talk to my friends about him n they dont like fully understand bc theyve never liked someone so mucg #its just so embarassing to talk about n i just BDNDJDJNDJD #i just !!!! always imagined myself single. and would Say Stuff about not wanting anything like that but now im a big clown JDJDJDJJDDJ #BUT HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW ITD BE LIKE THIS. GOD #im also like. trying to talk myself out of it. like oh maybe its all in my head JDJDJDJDJDN #but like just too much has happened. idk. im just........ im feeling impatient 😭😭😭😭#but like. its progressed well so far with me just progressing things when they feel Right. hhhhh god #and like things wouldnt have progressed this far without him liking me at least a little????#idk !!!!!!!!!!!! this stuff is so hard. and like i cant even see him now without making plans hhhhhhhhhhh #it was so much easier before we graduated NDJDJDJDJDMMFMD #ah well..... soon i guess. soon #itd be really nice tho if he like asked me out. but i have a feeling that maybe im not being obvious to him?? maybe i gotta spell it out idk #he also said (in ref to a job offer tho) that he wouldnt take it unless it was for sure #and i have a feeling......... that maybe hes not sure ????????? god idk #rip to my simple life. guess i gotta wait til i see him again hhhhhhh #personal

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