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#die. but even then you can tell... theyve changed. you can see it in there eyes. how they carry themself
sirotras · 16 days
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i just thought about fergus reuniting with cousland after the blight and uh
well im not gonna be ok about that
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effervescentdragon · 8 months
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This is gonna be a rant bcs i havent done one in a while, it went feom too hot to too cold way too quickly, i havent fought with anyone in a while and im itching for it, and im sick an tired of certain things im seeing popping up recently despite there being many, many posts about it that summarize it all very succintly amd more eloquently than im about to, but fuck it im adding mine too.
Two main points. Numero uno.
You are not entitled to fandom spaces being catered to you.
Ive seen younger fans do this all the time, and i could go very ad hominem about what i think of youmger generations and what kind of internet experiences and spaces they've been raised in, but i wont. I will say that predictive algorithms and that scourge on the web tiktok have done irreparable damage to a whole genrration that expects content to just be presented to them on silver plates without them having to move their thumbs even a bit to search for what they want, alongside erasing what little critical thinking and reading skills theyve already somewhat had.
But thats not the point of this rant. My main problem here is when someone comes into a space, lets take an example of a discord server, and then starts whining how "all these older people are here too".
Firstly, fuck off. And i say this most empathetically - if something is not to your liking, literally just leave. Fuck off. Nobody wants you here. Go find a place that caters to your needs better instead of expecting this already existing space to bow down amd change to suit your needs. Thats not hkw this works, not how life works, not how anything works. Your entitlement is unfounded, has no geounds, is childish and frankly extremely disgusting. Go make your own fucking space then, one that you can tailor to your needs instead of expecting the space to warp to suit you. You are nothing in this context, and you are entitled to nothing, except basic rules of polite conduct that ar3 expected of everyone by social contract of interacting with other people in a space.
Point numero dos.
Fuck your ageism and fuck your idiotic assumption that there is an arbitrary age when you should leave fandom because you're "too old" and "it's creepy".
The world is not restricted to the young. The world is not built for the young only. Joy is not restricted to the young. YOU ARE NOT BETTER B3CAUSE YOU'RE YOUNG. I would in fact argue the opposite, because obvious lack of life experience (especially when compounded with the fact that most of the experience most of you even have are limited to online spaces and not the actual outside world) shows itself in both your ignorance about the (fandom) history and with your conpletely misguided sense of entitlement i already spoke about.
What even is the age to be enrolled in fandom? Does life stop after 20? 25? 29? Or god forbid, *gasp*, thirty? Thats basically both feet in the grave, isn't it?
Do you even hear yourselves? Because unless you have forwknowledge or plan to die when you come to [insert arbitrary age here], you are still going to be living after that. Will that moment, that birthday be the time whrre you go "right. im too old now. i should erase all the joy ive gotten feom fandoms up until now b3cause im too old and fandoms and fandom spaces are only for young people, which i am not anymore. bye bye".
What the everloving fuck. Do you think young people are the onse who built fandoms? Do i have to drag out star trek spirk housewives? Do i have to reference diana duane? Do i have to dig through a million posts on this godforsaken website that tell you about communities of people of all ages coming together to enjoy things and make fandom spaces as wonderful as they are?
Do you think you can only enjoy life up until [insert arbitrary fucking age here]? Do you think life stops after 30, 40, 50, 60, 70, if you're lucky to live that long?
What the everloving fuck is wrong with you???
Instead of sending stupid 😭 emojis about people being older than your 18 years of age and still enjoying things, go read a bit on fandom history. Log off fucking predictive algorithm pages, stop scrolling, read a fucking book, go touch a cow, smoke or touch some grass, talk to actual fuking people and not just bemoan existence of older people in your tween echo chambers.
Get a fucking life, adapt, and/or leave the rest of us alone. The world does not revolve around you, and if you keep insisting it does, well. We older generations have no problem with blocking. We value ourselves too much to disrupt our joy with childish whinings of entitled assholes.
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praxeus. episode of all time. yaz episode of all time. radiating self-assurance, showing off all the things shes learnt, wanting the doctor to see how good she is at this. at playing doctor and loving it. relishing having the keys to all places, having Secret Knowledge of Alien Things that she is in no way about to share with either jake or gabriela because where would be the rush of power in that?
jake, the (ex-)copper on a sabbatical. "except i dont go telling people im police!" give it a year or two love and youre using this (ex-)title on each of your self-found companions. which youre practicing now for with gabriela, pretty girl to forcefully introduce to her very first alien planet. well, almost.
both the girl best friends who've known each other for 5 years and one of which dies exploding, and the uncommunicative married/separated husbands who are punishing each other or themselves, one of which, again, almost dies exploding, looking like thasmin from every angle. (looking like thoschei, too, further back. because thats whats behind every picture of thasmin whichever way you cut it)
watching the identities slip and slide changing hands between all these parallels. Adam, sick astronaut, experimented on by aliens, clear doctor figure. or is he? jake, on the beach, sits where the doctor sits, saying he doesnt do emotions, admitting to being purposefully unreliable, unable to commit, disliking travelling! jake who can be summoned with a "help me". jake, who doesnt believe adam could really love him. who are we to apply this sentiment to, then? obviously, both. obviously, all.
"we didnt teleport into an active volcano!" yaz exclaims, too surprised at her own success to really be reassuring, as she holds onto her new friend's wrist, not hand, steering, directing, controlling. "im supposed to be the one saying that to you," the doctor responds, a year or three (or six, for yaz) later, when the destination is an active volcano, when in all these years theyve learnt to fly a spaceship together ("adam lang, your job is so easy!") but still havent figured out how to say the things that need saying, when one of them is dying, and the last time yaz was still pretending to be on sabbatical she knew for sure how old she was. two girls roaming.
the doctor wants so badly to figure this out, needs this win, after the identity shock of ruth, all the unanswered questions. even after the betrayal, after all the bad thats been done. "look at us, suki! two brilliant scientists, we can fix this!" whatever you did, whatever youve done, in desperation, wasnt right, but it's not the end. you can fuck it all up, and then you can help to try and unfuck as much as you can. just think. do not get carried away by fear. thats what scientist means, in the thirteenth doctor's mouth. someone who realises problems have solutions. that can be found. if you delay your frightened desperate furious reaction and just think for a second. she wishes she and suki could have worked together. she wishes they could have saved her planet as well as earth. she wishes she could have sent suki home, safe and sound, with solutions for whoever is left there, waiting for her, desperate and afraid. they will never know what happened. they will die sick and in ignorance.
adam offers himself up. hes dying anyway. they need a clinical trial and he is a suitable body to test on. makes you wonder. the master did not tell us everything, and what he didnt we'll never know, but as graham put it "i aint the fantasist round here" (detective morse, by the way, is not a reference i knew, but from wikipedia this character doesnt seem much to match jake's vibes, the master (and/or doctor) however...) what sense of duty might the child have felt? what sense of duty might the child have been talked into? or is that too patronising a way to frame it? what loyalty to her adoptive mother, a scientist and explorer, an example that still loudly resonates in 13, first-time woman, and what loyalty to her adoptive planet, people? what was life like on prehistoric gallifrey? "sparsely populated" is all we get. nothing about the possible reasons. disease doesnt seem out of the question. why did tecteun leave? "dangerous, unsophisticated space travel". why do something so dangerous? just the quest for knowledge? or was there desperation? was there fear?
"maybe," the doctor says, "i'll never know". and tecteun replies with a phrase the doctor herself has tried to leverage against yaz: the journey of a lifetime. "what do you do, 'Doctor'? pick people up, take them with you? you adopt them, use them, for reassurance, for company. theyre your experiments just as you were mine."
could she have been something else? who knows. but adam offered. and before that adam trained. and adam stepped into a rocket. and adam let himself be shot into space. scientist and explorer. and we're all full of plastic, whether we know it or not. and the doctor's a romantic. which is to say an idealist, here for the lost causes, a virus to kill the disease of our own making. infectious, and aware of it.
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sieglinde-freud · 11 months
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i think the fell xenologue does a great job at characterizing some of the royals beyond the vanilla game mostly because every single royal has like one or two core principles that really make them who they are and so getting rid of those one or two things completely converts them into a completely different person. like alcryst losing his self doubt, celine loses her empathy, hortensia loses her resilience, etc etc. but i think my favorite version of this has to be fogado, who has in my opinion the most drastic change. i think all of the other royals have very outward presenting traits that you can easily catch onto and see theyve lost. but fogado is just a little different, because what fell fogado lacks isnt really a trait; he loses his sense of love. (rest under the cut bc it turned into an essay. my bad also fell xenologue spoilers obvs)
“our” fogado (?? idk how to differentiate between them. work with me here) is not an easy person to read in universe. he makes it very clear in chapter 13 that he’s pretty good at deception and is very willing to make use of that skill. his supports with timerra and pandreo also tell us he’s gotten used to keeping up a specially crafted persona meant to kind of suppress his feelings (that timerra and pandreo can see through but. like 1. theyre smart 2. sister and bff ok moving on). but he doesn’t do it out of malice or because he just likes being tricky, he lies because he loves. everything in fogado’s life is shaped by what he loves: his country, his friends, and his sister. every single motivation he has is fueled by this: the constant partying, how often he leaves the castle, all his acting. its even in his goddamn class name (cupido) and birthday (feb 14) if you needed the game to spell it out for you
so thats why when we get to the fell xenologue, the fogado we meet is changed in that one specific way: his love is gone. we know this because of a few things, the first of which is that he is honest. aside from the robe (in which he is assassinating someone! but also. lets be so honest with ourselves here. you can see his fucking face) he’s immediately upfront with his intentions: he wants the bracelets, he wants power, and he wants you to die. and thats it. he just kind of hands you that information, and then fucks off when you win. on what earth would our fogado do that? dude wouldnt even tell you if he broke his leg, he just partied a little hard last night. but thats just it isnt it? our fogado lies because he loves people, hes protecting them. fell!fogado is transparent because he’s not protecting anyone, he doesn’t care.
but the biggest kicker in fell!fogado’s lack of love is in his interaction with our timerra. our fogado loves his sister more than anything, as he literally plans his entire life around making HER life easier. he sacrifices even just spending time with her just because he needs to make sure hes fully prepared to keep her safe (not that timerra wants that for him but he doesnt really get that. which is another topic i could dive into but this post is long enough lets not make it a novel). fell!fogado though? well you see–
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any love fogado holds for his sister, or any love at all really, is just not present in fell!fogado. and you could say that maybe its just because of the corruption, but then why do we still see love between the fierenese and brodian siblings? even fell!timerra still loves her brother if her conversation with our fogado is anything to go off of. but the writers know that fogado lives and dies on his love for people, its his entire being and so much more so than the rest of the cast. which is why thats what had to change in him for the fell xenologue. it wasnt really just a flip of the switch haha murder thing (though. it could have been handled better. lets be real) but it was the loss of everything that makes fogado him. and i think the fact that this gets to be highlighted in the dlc just makes base game fogado all that much more interesting, because it cements his motivation now that we know what he's like without it. fogado is a guy driven by love and its just fucking great
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Please tell me about Harper and Feena!
OMEHAGUROHMEGAUR OKOKOKOKOKOKOK SOSOSOOSOSOSO (thamk yo uso much TEHE) alao im sorry if this makes NO SENSE im spilling my head into paragraphs and not proofreading rhis is gonna end HORRIBLY but i hope you enjoy😭!
Anwyay so harper and feena started when @thatbiblicallyaccuraterat asked me to draw a silly guy eating monster much and he turned into harper (ill link some pictures to show) and he felt lonely so i made him a friend called feena and theyve been a thibg since then HOLY SHIT I THINK ITS BEEN 2 YEARS?????
Harper and feena r supposed to be my silly ocs that are my go toos when i start daydreaming and drawing! Their not supoosed to have too much trauma and stuff (IM CONTAINING MYSELF) so i camt head empty and harper its also so when i draw them they make me happy they are my happyness. So becazue i cant give them trauma i make altermate realitoes where i CAN give them trauma!!
Im gonna make sections so i caj explain everthing so it can atleast try to make sense
1. THEIR RELATIONSHIP :3
Ok so when i started I made them friends ofc!! And i thought they where cool as hell so i started thinking about their relationship and i was thinking how wierd it would feel if they where a couple so their thing is that their completely platonic and are jist realy close friends that are realy comfortable with each other, i wouldnt say like 'siblings' but more like that one cousin that your realy close with. I like to think of them as denji and power from chainsaw man (however i see denji and power as more of siblings) but no matter how close they get with eachither they dont feel anything romantic :3 i have a thing that when they where 14/15 they where like fuck it lets kiss and they hated it!!!!! they wanted to die!!!!!
I also have different ages for them i draw them as for whatever mood im in! So i have toddler harper and feena (theyve met in primary school) and then children harper and feena (10-12) and then theres also teen (14-16) and preadult idk forgot what its called (17-19) and adult! (20-22) by 20-22 they have an appartment with 2 other roomates nadia and caspian i dont realy have a story for them yet however they do have designs. So basically they jsut spend their entire lives together as besties and this is their main world where their happy and have no trauma and are just silly!!
2. Sexualities n stuff
Well im nor good at this stuff since i realy have no kmowledge but i kinda just peojected me and @thatbiblicallyaccuraterat onto them...
Harper:
Bisexual, he/they. Dyslexic and/or is on the autism spectrum idk i dont think much about this
Feena:
Aro/ace or Asexual i havent decided, goes by anything. I honestly dont even know she is any and all illnesses
3. Childhood and all
So i dont wanna give them a traumatic childhood since their my silly chracters!!
HOWEVER, they do have some sort of backstories.
Feena:
Some sort of religious trauma, her family where 100% praise our lord and saviour jesus christ and she didnt feel part. Knew what she was when she was a teen and after harper came out and was more comfortable. Didnt tell her parents until she moved out, (they very obviously didnt take it well) however is still in touch with them!! Their just kinda realy uncomforable whenever the subject changes to jesus or gay stuff idk.
Harper:
Twas a bit (a lot) stupider than most people his age (austismmmmm) his parents payed more attention to their sisters so that they could have a better education instead of wasting their time on a child thatll never learn and refuses to listen (wasnt diagnosed till he was an adult so they thought he was being annoying purposefully). Tbh just whats a hug LMAO. He came out to his parents, they told him it was just a phase and theylll get out of it eventually.
So ya!
4. The cats need their own section
So ive always eanted these 2 cats, one called jester one called mariposa. So if i cant have them whats better than having my oc that represents me having them?
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This is jester! (SHES PREFECT THIS IS HOW I ENVISION HER)
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This is mariposa :3
5. Universes
Like i said since i dont want harper and feena to have too much trauma i create new universes for them! Other than my main ailly one theres another 3 i favour out of all the ones i make
1. I made a dystopian after apocolypse one (MY PERSONAL FAVOURITE ITS SO FUN TO MAKE!!) where the aftermath is that the world (well at leats where their living) is split into two, the privlidged and less priveledged (I NEED NAMES FOR THESE I DONT HAVE ANY) anywwy what i think i can best decribe this as is like the hunger games, where theres the 'capitol' and the 'districts' but instead of there being districts its all just survival of the fittest L lmao so yah. So after the apocolypse harper and feena are split up. Feena ends up with the privileged and harper ends up with the less. Harper finds a place he can call 'home' (FOUNDFAMILYFOUNDFMILYFOUNDFAMILY) and feena ends up on the other side where she gets her memories wiped and she then hets brainwashed to belive she was sent down as a gift from god during hard times and everyone is supposed to worship her (tehe i wont bother yiu with any more of this story)
2. Silly little 80s teen ghost busting show like scooby doo with harper feena nadia and caspian
3. detective harper and feena (havent built a lot)
6. I FORGOT TO ADD DYNAMIC
So basically feena can be smart when she wants to but chooses to fuck around with harper, quite a bitch if you guys just met. Pretty resereved when shes around people she doesnt know amd her social skills arent great. If you give her a chance she can be quite nice and passionate. Can ramble for hours on ends
Harper, guys hes trying his best. Loud, can ramble for hours on end too.
And thats all i can think of...sorry for ramblong so much i jist realy love them. i dont expect anyonw to actually read this... Once again this is just me projecting me and @thatbiblicallyaccuraterat onto harper anf feena!
Thank you @rainbowghostcat sososoososo much i love youuahahhah <333
Ill attach drawing of them in the mprning!
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wiihtigo · 1 year
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4, 32, 37
love and peas ask game
4. What’s your favorite comic book friendship?
bwahh.........it has to go to bea and booster. ted and babs come close but the parallels are paralleling with those two and it drives me crazy everytime i think about it
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one part in jla in particular i think to in regards to them being The Same Person is when boosters suit is broken and beas powers are gone so they both cant do stupidhero stuff and theyre both going a little crazy but beas like "wow boosters losing it. thats nothing like me though. (CUT TO BEA HOLDING HER BREATH AND TRYING TO DIE BECAUSE SHE CANT USE HER POWERS)
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also their dual "YOU NOT ROCKIN WITH ME? IM GOING TO KILL MYSELF" moments when tora wanted to leave the league and ted wanted to stop being the blue beetle
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theyre both..really clingy and dependent on their best friends. and that behavior is only magnified after they die
the two of them literally have synchronized mental illness moments. the way they both lose their blue color coded best friends who they were in love with that provided a balance to their lives that tips them to the point of having a really unhealthy crazy grief response (beas Whole Deal with sigrid and the way booster acts in 52)..a textual parallel is drawn here by bea herself
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booster and bea both care too much despite having loved and lost and dealing heavily with feelings of being left alone and blaming themselves for it but they continue living to help others because they ARE GOOD PEOPLE!! AND THEYRE HEROES!! even though after losing tora and ted they both kind of drop the way they used to hero before (bea working for checkmate as a spy and booster protecting the time stream with his family from the shadows..they both have jobs now basically the opposite of the flashy spotlight roles they had in the league)
bea and booster are so alike i want to kill them. theyre best friends. theyre family. theyve known each other like 20 yrs and they havent interacted since like jl3000 CAN WE ALL DIEE
32. Who are two characters you’d like to see interact more?
the question and ted would be nice. their teamup in bleeble 86 was so good i want them to hang out more. or even ever again. i dont think renee and ted have ever met but id like to see them teamup too someday
37. Any characters you used to dislike but now you like? What changed your mind?
guy gardner....i did a complete turnaround on him through reading jli....hes my best friend now. my guy. and it was so unexpected too and i was so shy about it at some point i was reading and idk guy would do something and id think "what the. that was sort of cute. i cant tell ANYONE ABOUT THIS" ..he grew on me like a moss
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rigil-kentauris · 8 months
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thinking about the forbidden FEH man, are we? (´• ω •`)
*sighs* YES, THERES MORE THAN ONE CLOWN ON THE DASH TODAY
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its HIS FAULT ^^^^^^^^^^ i wake up every day and look at my zsumzsum its a CONSTANT reminder of the BETTER PAST i once beheld... i cant bring my self to get rid of him because he took me forever to make. i really ought to, but cest la vie.
also i heard that laegjarn the undead is now canonically runnig things in muspell which, i am vulnerable to thinking about my modern AU, and you cant just tell me laegjarns not just back but BACK and that laevateinn has a chance to be a proper child again and NOT make me go hmm... you could make a narrative out of that. the younger generation (laevateinn, ylgr) getting back the siblings theyve lost to war, getting to step back from the resposibility for a nation (not a queen, not the only niflian princess carrying the legacy of her two dead older sisters and mother). the younger generations PERHAPS getting to bond and become friends and share their experiences as the heal from the shared trauma.
in fact its almost like. theres another child, who is a younger sister. with a dead sibling. and responsibility for a nation. and a crippling sense of isolationary lonliness who.
this could also apply to.
ANYWAY THEY HAD SOME AUDACITY. to make a whole book worth of narrative that said. no matter how hopeless it seems, you still have hope. your friends can help you. you may want to die, but death is not the answer. if that god troubles you we'll kill that god. and then. make death the answer and kill the HIM instead. i was hopelessly biased but i still think that was a shit thing to do to your narrative. especially when the meta of that narrative is Let's Collect Friends And Become Stronger
what a waste of a quote, too. i know i just said it but WHAT A MOMENT. ''you cant fight the gods'' ''NOT TRUE i can and will find and kill if that god is bothering you king'' and then you dont even give your MC a win? what a MISS. what a miss.
not a single person in the story for whom i think that story beat worked and i will never understand it.
but at least it freed me from feh. largely anyway. sometimes i see a post like ''what if my love for you changed the narrative'' and i think. sigh. we could have had anything but what we got. anything at all
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basilpaste · 1 year
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tell me about chasse and charle i will die in 0.3 seconds
ill start by sharing their signs, which i actually posted earlier today cuz i didnt expect to do art of them any time soon!
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Obstinate: stubbornly refusing to change one's opinion or chosen course of action, despite attempts to persuade one to do so. Cherished: protect and care for (someone) lovingly. / hold (something) dear.
chasse is a prospit dreamer, her aspect is Matter (mind+life). charle is also a prospit dreamer! their aspect is Spirit (heart+blood).
chasse is based on ballroom dancing, specifically waltz! infact, her castename (valzer) is waltz in italian! chasse is directly the name of a dance move thats common in many styles of dance, but as someone who can waltz. its pretty common. her quirk is pretty simple! "Th3 quick brown fox jump3d ov3r th3 lazy dog." 3 because waltz is in 3/4 time!
charle is also based on a style of dance, but hers is the much more energetic swing dance! if they spoke, itd be in a transatlantic accent! charle, quite simply, comes from the charleston! likewise, jitter comes from 'jitterbug', a way to describe swing dancing in general and also the name for another move in the style! her quirk is just as intergenic as she is! "Thee quiick brown fox jumpeed over thee lazyy dog!!" but its also very common to "HEEAR THIIS JIITTEERBUG SHOUTIING!!"
chasse is very work-oriented and determined. shes often very blunt and says things just how they are. shes not unempathetic, though, and cares deeply for her loved ones. being rust, shes learned how to set boundaries just subtly enough that no one realizes theyve been set but her, even though everyone follows them anyways. shes effortlessly graceful and the way her touch lingers could send even the coldest heart racing.
charle is... not quite so graceful. shes a very fun motivated gal, you see! shes got a literal heart of gold but knows that not everyone appreciates a sit-down talk! theyre all about positive distractions, got it? high energy and boundlessly optimistic, theyll be sure to get just about anyone laughing along with her! though she also knows when to be more sensitive. they give great hugs.
theyre both friends sunett made during her dancing days! neither of them specialized in ballet, but theyd often be backup dancers or understudies! the three of them had a pretty close friendship up until sunetts abrupt departure from the dance scene and subsequent loss of eye. not for lack of trying to stay in contact, though. sunett was just... dealing with stuff.
... the two of them might also just. have the tiniest of flush crushes on each other. just maybe.
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weirdbabs · 1 year
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i will say, now that ive had time to ruminate on it a little, i dont really like what the show is doing with the fireflies. we havent seen much of them, just in the boston episodes, but what little theyre giving me and how theyre portraying fedra as well is making me 😬 a leeeetle bit sus
gonna put this under cut bc it got Long
i mean. right away theres a difference in how were exposed to them in that the game gives us news clips letting us know whats happened over the 20 years, how cities have been placed under marshal law, how riots have broken out as rations hit all time lows, how the fireflies started fighting back and how their public charter calls for the return of the branches of government, how fedras started holding public executions for “alleged fireflies”. the show doesnt give us anything like that, instead shows us that little boy who they let in and test, before promising that they were going to take care of him and he was safe now only to cut to the burn cart/pit where we find his body is. sure that lets us know that theyll lie and promise to protect you only to kill you but you can argue in their favor. he was infected, theres a short incubation period and who knows when he was infected, they did it in a gentle way (seems like euthanasia), they made an effort to help him. they saw this boy faint and they brought him inside the qz. the game fedra wouldnt have let him in even if there wasnt the chance he was infected, there were issues with rations as it was.
there are changes in what were shown of fedra too, little but they add up. we dont see them pulling people out of a condemned building and shooting anyone who tries to run/resist. we dont see any evidence of people being selected for “outside work duty”, but instead see people volunteering for work in hopes for extra ration cards. we dont see the ration line that hasnt opened yet, that people have been waiting in for who knows how long bc theyre running low. dont get to hear the guy telling his friend to keep his voice down when complaining about fedra bc otherwise he might die. sure they still have their public executions for unauthorized entry/exits of the qz, sure they still hold tess in a cell overnight bc they think she might be a firefly, but theyre still shown overall in a kinder light
and then we have the introduction of the fireflies. in the show theyre holding ellie, chained to a wall, who we learned they snatched off the street. they leave her like that, come check on her once or twice a day, take notes and leave. they dont even give her a change of clothes based on the fact shes wearing what she was when she was bit. i didnt see any bucket or anything so i dont know what they were doing for her bathroom situation cause they sure as shit werent gonna let her out of their sight. when we meet ellie in the game, shes free to move about the room shes hiding in as she wishes. shes hiding there by choice, bc she specifically sought marlene out after she was bitten. she knew for about 3 weeks that she could be the cure rather than finding out the day she was being shipped off.
when it comes to meeting “the queen firefly herself”, marlene is shown in show to be strategic and cunning. shes planning on how to get her troops out of the city by causing as much chaos as possible, spread the fedra soldiers thin and hope to keep them distracted so they can hopefully sneak out unnoticed. in the game theyve been planning on leaving the city for weeks (presumably from the moment she realized ellie was immune) and they went quiet. but fedra needs a scape goat, they need someone who they can blame the problems on, someone other than themselves who the qz can hate. so theyve been picking fights, hoping to rile them up. the fireflies are in a desperate situation trying to defend themselves rather than taking a stand
and then of course you have them changing it from the fedra hunting joel, ellie, and tess down under the assumption that they were fireflies (tying into what is reiterated throughout the game: that people are just as dangerous as the infected) to a hoard of infected chasing them, and removing the fireflies helping overthrow the pittsburgh kansas city qz (who wanted them to help take the fight to other qzs, and were instead captured and hung by the citizens)
and then in episode 7 they made one of the biggest changes yet in terms of the fedra/firefly dichotomy. in the show, the mall has recently been hooked up to the power when fedra opened a new block of buildings, which allows riley to show ellie the best day of her life. she knows about whats in the mall bc shes been stationed there by the fireflies, this 16 almost 17 yr old is stationed there alone in a building that hasnt even been properly cleared.
but in the game its a completely different story. the mall didnt suddenly gain powere, its had it the entire time. riley reveals this to ellie and we learn that fedra has the ability to provide power to every part of the city, they just say that it doesnt work as a way of controlling the populace. the fireflies dont have anyone stationed there, fedra do. a soldier named winston who was there to prevent people (and infected) from sneaking into the qz, who riley and ellie were sorta friends with and who taught ellie how to ride a horse.
by making those changes in left behind, suddenly you can make the argument that fedras not that bad. sure in some places like the kansas city qz theyre terrible but in others theyre actually trying to help the people! look how they expanded the qz! they got the power up and running and suddenly places like the mall work bc of that! look at the soldier who gave the warning to joel! sure he doesnt want to lose his supplier but he didnt have to give him the warning! and inversely you can make the argument that the fireflies are just as bad. look how they left a 16/17 year old alone with bombs! look how they open fire on the streets without care of whether they hit civilians! look how they view their personnel as expendable!
it feels like theyre gearing up to be like “actually the fireflies are just as bad as fedra” and im afraid if they go that route theyll have some shit take like “fighting your oppressors using aggressive/violent tactics makes you just as bad as the oppressor” or “if the fireflies make a cure theyll use it to ensure the people are under their control” or some shit like that
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twowink · 1 year
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OKAY SO.
actually the anime adaptation really fucked up the story fkjdsfjk. the arc is based off the light novel 'dazais entrance exam' in which this case was well. it was dazais entrance exam. so by putting it as part of the main timeline instead of two years prior to canon like its meant to be they really fucked it up fkjsdhf. not to mention they cut a bunch of stuff like its all about kunikida and dazai meeting for the first time and their relationship and dynamic.
that scene where kunikida and dazai instincitvely switch places in the fight just by calling out to each other and not having to communicate any further because they both intuitively know what the others thinking? yeah they did that a week or so into knowing each other.
the way the anime positions it is that oh they hate each other but theyve worked together a while now so they understand each other and work well together haha - ITS BULLSHIT. the trust they have between each other without even knowing or liking each other has been there From The Beginning.
the way dazai lets both rokuzou and sasaki die there isnt as cruel in the light novel, it makes so much more sense because dazais just come from the mafia where [spoilers spoilers blah blah] and so of course he wanted to see how much kunikida could be pushed. he wanted to see if this really was a place he could actually do good.
um. i might talk about kunikidas relationship with sasaki and rokuzou in another ask so its more manageable . but yeah the light novel is AMAZING i can tell you about some of the changes if you have any interest.........
OUUUH … theyr v fascinating ooo hmhnmm
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cryptcreechur · 2 years
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hey i know this is sort of an. out of nowhere question. but i cant find anywhere else and scientific resources just. seem to ignore whatever this is so im kinda desperate lol.
i keep having premonitions in my dreams. im not actively doing anything to have premonitions but talking to and doing some readings with my tarot and playing card decks. i barely use my crystals for anything but charging and cleansing the two of them. i cleanse my house with sage sometimes but i dont do any spellcraft besides that. the most i do to open up mentally is mess around trying to tell my friends how many fingers theyre holding up over discord and i only get that right like 30% of the time lol
but before my grandmother died, i asked my playing cards if her most recent decline in health was the sign of the end, and he gave me a definitive yes- 3 days later, she's gone. i appreciated the warning and thanked him for the help even if it did hurt really bad in the moment to pull that ace of spades and hear him say "yes, im so sorry." just recently, i had a dream about going to my grand aunt's funeral. a day later, my mom calls me and tells me she's gone- i didnt say anything about this dream since i was hoping it... yknow. was just a dream. didnt ask my cards about it. i didnt know her very well and hadnt been reminded of her in a while, so it freaked me out when i got the call and just.... knew already.
ive been having incidents like this happen in increasing frequency and its starting to get concerning since im not really the most in tune with my spiritual side so i dont get why this is happening? id really appreciate any second opinion, and i thank you in advance for just. reading this, haha
first of all, please don't feel like you're doing something wrong or out of the ordinary by having these. while it is scary and confusing, it seems like it's natural for you. i have premonition dreams as well, though theyve declined in frequency as my mental health has declined as well, but mine started coming around a lot when people or pets were about to die, or when something life-changing was going to happen. i was a preteen when i remember them starting and being frequent, so i definitely wasn't doing any intentional spellwork back then - it just happened.
premonitions are something that can occur with ease for some people, or with training and practice with others. that's how all clairsence works.
unfortunately, i dont know how to stop or lessen premonitions - the only thing that's ever worked for me was getting extremely depressed and on the edge of suicide, so i definitely don't recommend that. at all. but, i don't think you should try to shut it out. it can be scary, especially with what you're getting right now, and i understand.
journal your dreams. all of them. every morning as soon as you wake up and have a sip of water, bust out your nearest empty spiral bound notebook and write everything you can remember. even if its only one thing, or nothing. or a whole lot of something. i found that often, the act of writing out your dream can help you remember it even better.
dream journaling helps you keep track of what you know and what you don't, and you can practice dream interpretation if you feel like it (a lot of my premonitory dreams weren't so cut and dry as seeing a funeral, it would be something deeply symbolic, like a once dead deer suddenly rising and bursting into ash). aside from that, dream journaling can help improve memory and focus, and might even help you learn how to lucid dream.
also, i would consider asking your parents (if able) if they have or had premonitory dreams as well. when mine were first appearing, i was scared and worried, and i asked my mum about it, and she told me she has premonition dreams too, as did her mum, and her mum before her. it runs in our family, and when i spoke to friends that also claimed premonitory dreams, in ran in their families too. perhaps the elders in your family have some advice as well. premonitory dreams aren't inherently a spiritual thing, or limited to one spirituality - they happen in all religions and all walks of life whether spiritual or not.
thank you for sending me this ask, i hope this helped. please feel free to message me or send more asks if you have any other questions.
blessed be <3
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lunati0ns · 2 years
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of one mind liveblog pt 2.
okay lets finish this episode. all under the cut because we're deep in it
no dont tell me rue's backstory i'll fucking throw up. stop. STOP. NO WAY. OH MY GOD!!!!! YOU WERE A STOLEN WILD ANIMAL GIVEN SENTIENCE BY MAGIC IN A COURT THAT DIDNT REALLY CARE ABOUT YOU EXCEPT FOR YOUR NOVELTY oh my god im THROWING UP
the most beautiful bardic ever given T__T
brennan stopping everything to make it clear that he and andhera look HOT walking across this misty moor together... theyre so approaching the action climax of a romance novel have to save the heroine vibes....
SAVED DETECT THOUGHTS POTION AAAHH!!!
"seeing rue here i like visibly catch my breath in chest" WHY DONT I COUGH UP MY HEART. HM?
damn it DAMN IT THE INSIGHT FAIL. THE DICE HATE RUEHOB FOR REAL!!
oh my god the way rue cannot look at hob. UGH THE RAIN CLOUD ADDING A LITTLE WET. FUUCK THE 2000S BACKSTREET BOYS ACTION!
[rue voice] can you guys stop being in a one direction music video for a second im gonna DIE,
oh my god hob trusting andhera with the detect thoughts potion meaning that he ALSO trusts anhera with his thoughts of RUE.... one of his deepest shames.. HE HAD TO HAVE THOUGHT OF THIS BUT HE STILL..!! they are best friends of all time
oh my god bardic inspiration being a little tune that the bard sings just for you, and in the time you save it before you use it, its a song stuck in your head... i love that idea
hob stepping forward with his huge paw and cooly saying "let me speak plainly." he also has handsome vibes. hes also my dad. hes so GOOD AT HIS JOB!!!
my heart is pounding. the pause before this response. i am so stressed. what do you think of the court of wonder hob...
I LOVE HIIIIIM. POUNDS TABLE.
rue knocking over the dummies LMAOOO
scorple knows everything you HAVE to KILL that GOBLIN!!! i fucking love scorple BRAAP!
AAAAAA THE BINX VOICE CHANGE MIDWAY THROUGH HER SENTENCE WAH WAH WAH WAH SO COOL IM GAY SO COOL
THANK FUCKING GOD HOB GET RID OF THAT SCORPLE
the court of wonder has swallowed my court... :(
THE FUCK? DEAD FAIRIES ARE MAGIC ITEMS?
AAA HOB GETS TO MAKE A BATTLE PLANNING BOARD!!! BINX WORKING TOGETHER ON THE BATTLE PLAN CONSPIRACY BOARD!!!!
ee e e e e hob talking to rue AAA THEYRE HAVING A CONVERSATION. ITS BEEN SO LONG
STARE INTO HOB'S BEAUTIFUL EYES!!!!! HIS BEAUTIFUL LITTLE PUPPY EYES!!!
i dont belong anywhere. shut up. tries to touch them gently while crying but is stopped by my computer screen. THE SAD MUSIC...
oh my god this rue backstory. does wuvvy KNOW this stuff??
god rue makes me so sad. theyve been so abused by their court but they can't help but feel a stubborn sense of loyalty that they don't even understand. even if its awful, its where they come from...
oh my god shut the fuck UPP LEE MULLIGAN. HOB THINKING OF HOW HE AND RUE ARE THE SAME.. BADLY WANTING TO COMFORT THEM WITH THEIR SHARED EXPERIENCES BUT HOLDING BACK i cant take this shit
even when theyre completely alone in the woods surrounded by trusted friends hob cant bear to speak of the engagement too loudly... loyalty so deeply ingrained...
THE K IN KP STANDS FOR KNICKOLAS. THE SIGH. THE I LOVE HIM!!!!
AND ANDHERA KNOWS!!!!!!!!!!
I';LL EX[LODE. WILL THE COUSINS GET TO BE IN ON THE PLOT/??
ARE THEY GONNA SIDE WITH THE COURT OF WONDER?!?!? THE PVP POTENTIAL?!?!?!?
i could shit, myself. thanks for reading im going to die
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aces-basement · 2 years
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ok this is purely self indulgent but if for some odd reason you want to read this mess here are some things you should know
I'm not gonna try to make it good at all in fact I wont even edit its pure word vomit
itll be super fucking weird
if that scared you good. bye now. cringe time hehe
Ace and I were taking the kids to Springfield again. We were gonna let em play at the arcade while we ate at a restaurant together, just the 2 of us (getting sm to take to the kids afterward too ofc) but it's nice to just have time together as much as we love the kids.
And anyway what I didnt know is that the little shit (/aff) Beavis had wandered off and saw Barney passed out on the damn pavement in front of a place called Moe's tavern and thought "cool" so anyway the little fucker went inside
So I guess Beav asked for some beer and it kinda went like
"Can you like, get me a beer, or something? The alcoholic kind not the piss water. please"
The garish man looked up from his bar only a moment, just long enough to glance at the kid before muttering "Gonna need to see some ID. The feds are already breathing down my neck. Don't need another slip up"
"ARE YOU THREATENING ME?"
"Not yet I ain't"
"Oh. Alright. Cool. Can I like, have a beer now?" Beav asked, producing some coins and a small plastic dinosaur from his pocket
"Still gonna need to see some ID. If you ain't got any, best I can offer ya is a pickled egg. Even then theres a two drink minimum on that." Moe gestured to the glass container on the counter. Two of the eggs were floating. Not good
"Whoa. Cool. So if I eat one of these eggs, I can like, have two drinks minimum? Okay" Beavis dipped his arm into the container, only to grab and eat one of the floating eggs
"KID YOU CAN'T JUST-"
Anyway I dont know what happened after that cuz Beav passed out and couldn't tell me but anyway next thing Ace and I knew there was this gargoyle of a man approached us at the restaurants, holding our son by the nape of his shirt like a kitten. Ponyo was following after him.
"The little red rat told me ya might be here." He muttered, before yelling to me, "Hey, lady, mind watching your kid? Cuz if you payed any attention to him you might know you need to take him to the hospital, pronto."
"You talkin to them, man?" Ace looked around, "Cuz I don't see any 'lady' here."
I told Ace to stop under my breath and gestured for Ponyo to come to me, before I plucked Beavis from the stranger's grasp.
"Them? Oh, so you's one of those gender neutral folk," Moe hissed, with hatred behind it
Kids are secure. They're okay. Make sure Ace doesnt do anything-
Oh.
Theyve.
Already gotten into an arguement. With their fists.
Ace hit Moe. Moe hit the floor.
So you see officer that's why my husband knocked out your town's bartender
Wiggum sighed. "Well, you didn't wreck his mug. It's Moe, can't make him any uglier. So I guess I'll let you guys off with a warning." He said, uncuffing my husband, who pulled me into a hug
"I dont think that's fair but you know what, I'll take it." I told him, and Ace and I and the kids got the hell out of there before they changed their mind
I got the bartender's number, though. Maybe I should call him. Just to make sure he didn't die
But first we're gonna take Beavis to the hospital for eating a decade old boiled egg
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belovedism · 1 year
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1. What's the biggest wish the members of your otp have for the other? Is it a wish that could come true? Do they actively work towards it?
5. What's your otp's ideal vision of the future? What would they want to happen? Where would they want to live?
6. If your otp went on a holiday, what would they pack? What would they definitely forget? How would one react to the other forgetting that thing?
10. If your otp had met at a different point in time/their lives, what would change? Would they still end up together?
11. What is your otp's most special moment? If they could travel back in time to relive it, would they? Would they change anything?
14. What is something that would break up your otp? How high is the chance of it actually happening? 
19. Is the approval of family and friends important to your otp? If so, how would they try to win over a skeptical in-law? Would they cut people off if they didn't approve of the relationship?
i overuse the :3 face but eh :333c
they both wish that the other can just be mentally healthy tbh. theyve both gone through some shit and they just want each other to be genuinely happy
i think akemi mostly just wants to be with ayaka tbh. they wouldnt mind getting married though…. i dont particularly see them as wanting kids but then again its interesting to think abt them as parents
ayaka is definitely the type to overpack and akemi would have to get her to dial back. theyd probably forget something small like a toothbrush or phone charger and just buy a new one lol
if they met when they were kids, they’d probably still end up together through nature of hopes peak, its just that their reunion would be very heartfelt! if they met after ayakas grandma died…….. well. they wouldnt get together lol. ayaka would either be dead or so depressed that she wouldn’t put in the effort to form a friendship with akemi, since she wouldnt have as strong as a support system to help her through it.
hmmmm. probably when ayaka finally got through to akemi and became her friend. akemi would go back and be like “fina-fucking-lly you took so long!!!!” so
tbh. if akemi never actually got help i feel like her mental health would just get worse and she would lash out at ayaka a lot and eventually ayaka would lose motivation to keep trying to help. luckily that didnt happen lol…… alternatively, if back at hpa akemi’s mom bothered to actually take advantage of the fact that akemi was a minor still and forced her to come back home, akemi wouldnt be there anymore and therefore ayaka couldnt date her (less of a breakup but still).
its not very important to them, but seeing as all parents are either cut off or dead and ayakas brothers approve, they dont have much to worry about lol
bonus:
8. One part of your otp found out they didn't have much time left to live. How would they react? Would they tell the other? Would they spend every last second together or would they withdraw to soften the blow?
taking this as akemi being the one who is about to die bc. yeah.
ayaka. would be so broken. like genuinely. first her grandmother, now akemi? she wouldnt be able to handle it. theyd spend the rest of akemis life together and ayaka would say that she would keep living on without her. but not even after a week after akemi dies shes also dead. she couldnt possibly live any longer, partially because of grief, partially because what if its hachi next? what if its her brothers next? etc etc
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the-firebird69 · 2 years
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So we're suing a lot of people in around here and it's for alien alienating our son and enslaving pain less than subsistence pay aggravating harassing trying to break him down to build them back up daily by having a rise to the highest occasion and a lot more abuses. And abusing family members even Mac Daddy Tommy f and anyone whose family or who are friends friends even distant ones separating and culling on and on and it did not stop with that it was continuous today the the abuses we wrote them all down and we only added a few but they are daily human poverty show them how they're using their ideas are ideas and everything about it is abuse and saying is used for code against his tons of stuff like that and it's sitting there saying someday it'll pay off and she's other clans. Their women are sick of them and want them out of the house out of their life just go off and die like everyone else and will die after because you're an idiot they say it in the actor and they then they act like they're not then the actor then you try and do something to their women a lot of times the wife kills them cuz they're wimps and they're just child abusers and that's what we're up against wimpy child abusers. And they've got a huge chip on their shoulder and a huge attitude and they don't run everything because Mac and his kids owned everything and Trump took over and lost we took all that stuff the idiots can't tell I think it's other clans cuz we look like other clans cuz he keep attacking and we keep taking them out it's just horrible what they're doing. So we can't tell them and we can't stop them can't reason with them can't do anything to switch them from doing it so tonight we're going to attack them up there in DC they'll come down here and they'll have to fight you and you'll be busy so don't bother the s*** out of our son and you'll see it cuz you need to see it it's a horrible thing and the online and they're not doing anything right but we don't know how you going to get them to do anything right it sucks so bad it's been years and years and years and he's a child keep saying it too I'm like a young child like don't know how to deal with your abuse and up there people who are afraid to work and these guys work all the time tons of different jobs all this effort only have this pile of idiots screw it up as a beautiful tile is putting in very difficult set because it's that even with each other and it's a thin joint and theyve got two people. Now we're on to the problem and they are too and they're just one of the problems and it's getting worse and worse and there are just a huge number of people saying that this is a waste of time and they can't change it so I have to do something and the lasers are the biggest problem right now and the DC assholes ignore it and say we just have to grab them so they're going to they're going to sit there doing that and probably doing nothing else.
I'm getting ready to go ahead with the Warhammer ships and starcraft in Zerg and space Marines and we're going to pummel them assholes up there in DC we're at waste of time. Massachusetts is going to fall because Tommy and he has a huge base there it's a giant facility underground and they found it and they're trying to figure out what to do about it and he's going to come pouring out everyday and they're going to end up fighting it it's going to ruin the place. And several more things that are happening one of them is I'll send this kind of delapitating little, he needs supplies and mobility and healing in other words he can afford better medicine and food and it's a lot of trouble for him to go out in this bike and get stuff. At least the bag out of them is what he says so he tries to stay up during the day so sleep at night and sometimes can't make it in the afternoon he falls asleep sorry I'm tired we're going to help him. Now there's a few things we need to change and working at it we need to get them funds we need to have some serious groups pay attention to it I don't want these people making fun of them so much it's ridiculous it hurts and you can't stop talking and people won't listen and yes it looks bad and he risks of his life and harrogance man says stuff I don't think we're doing the right thing by him that's for sure he's pushing me right and he's getting it done is calling the shots and they're correct and he says I'm too low and too low and he's sending it out so he had Frank Castle Hardcastle put together something and hand it out to you and hope that you get it done and I have that feeling all the time I can't seem to express to you get him the hell out of there I don't want him to be the center of the whole universe the carnival the food the money the housing the incomes of everyone it's way over to talk for him to be blamed they looked at that and we did and we said you're right of course we're having trouble getting out of it and now we're trying a lot harder because he was correct this is ridiculous
We have several plans I'm going to ease them into different stuff and that's what you said to do you can't just drop it and you have to ease me and stuff I'm going to start doing it at some point and he's going to get plenty of heat from it.
Working on several money ideas and yeah these idiots say they're going to take his body over or him or have him lead and they'll tell him what to do and also s*** and it's all cop out ridiculous stuff because what they're doing what they're doing is dog s***. And they kind of should know it. Pja thinks he can use them to win the election all sorts of stuff and it all just sitting there f****** around with him saying they can get this they can get that it's ridiculous this isn't a salesman competition you know I invent deadly weapon systems and apparently you guys are willing to give that up to trying to be president and trying to get a new car and all this horse s*** that's true so nobody's listening to that so we have to step in and we're going to do a lot more of it right now our building another base and it's Giant it's bigger than all of the other bases combined and it's much larger than say 10 obelisk which are humongous and we should have probably a few of those so I'm saying where and he's right and we can put them in and they do fit and we will have to remove these cages there's just no time to do all the stuff I'm putting it in anyways cuz we're going to have tons of concrete and I'm doing it right now.
We're moving in now we have tons of construction projects to do and he needs to change a pace he says everybody's having a talk all night long and all day and then these idiots start wailing on him she's not like no time to recuperate or to rest and we'll see it too and it's something we have to do and he has to try and get it done to try and break out of this but really it's going to come from us Pew but he says he has to be involved and a lot and it gets it done better I agree it's something we have to do but for Christ's sake they're taking too much time to sing and screaming and yelling and doing nothing and bothering us so we're going to solve the problem and we said it every time but now it's coming up to the back to the to the wall and it's going to be real and fully and we have to prep for that and they'll be a repercussions everywhere I was trying to get ready all over the world and just in time with this obelisk idea and the white blocks is intense. They have several plans I want to try and use on these structures and some of them might be a threat then they have their missile plan which are they're going to start doing shortly once I get finally kicked out of the big West he's laughing because he says that could be the thing it's been all this time trying to get themselves kicked out and took just a lot more we need to own most of the businesses in the banks .
And we took a lot of businesses over today and people are pouring in all over the place to try and take them back and we issued a lot of notices it's not even a business day and I was working today and they suck they do hardly anything it's not even worth having them in I feel like telling them all to go home instead of just fired them. They really don't work very well most of the more I don't do anything and the other assholes are hardly working and it's a great thing. We need a better venue for our stores I mean we don't have advertising and we don't have a platform for advertising and we don't have a way to do it. I was suggesting a franchise board, and it's like a internet thing where you put franchises that are available and you can click and it shows you the outside and the inside and then it shows you like what it looks like everywhere and then it shows you what they serve for food and some of the prices and our son says it's a great idea and daughter and it's a great way to get in in the billions in an area instead of millions or millions instead of thousands really cuz there are a few million McDonald's in each area and we have a few thousand so you don't give a s*** we have to man these companies and we actually made them and we get pretty big so we have to do this for you and it's always just distribution everywhere centers. But where do you put the boards I mean is there like a franchise board you know like how many companies we have within a company besides do it cuz it it's all different companies and someone by different groups of ours.
So my son says you have a franchise show and it's traveling and you put it on wherever you can get it usually a convention centers and you rent them when you can and you rent the park here and there if they lie to and if you can't put them in a building we have a lot of vacant buildings and it has they have huge areas we can do it in and they're in the cities and says you set one up in our building right now cuz he shows that we have a building and it's better than a convention Center and it's better than a park and it's a great idea and I had the perfect idea that's going to do it online but he said you do it in one of our buildings and you said each and every table up with the product with samples food and you is free for people want to buy or run a franchise and we have to have some sort of pre-qualification and you have we have a bunch of shops kicker 5150 so he wants to be in one of the shows doing whatever you know handing out leaflets. We're going to go ahead with the idea he wants people have the experience not the full experience but the taste and the service and even the seating right out in front of the particular kiosk and you know they won't be too far apart but they'll be a seat for each or two benches for each and we agree with it and say like hard knock kicker would have like two two boos with their memorabilia and you have a few bikes in front of it and you would of course go from there and here we go again looks like they dropped Reema Lord off again which is not exactly illegal either.
So we're going to put it online but he says it's a good idea but we should set up a show put it online and announce the show and we'll have other shows and each show might have a couple different vendors and we'll keep adding them to our website and that's a great idea
That way it's not one company who owns it all that's all these companies that are underneath this organization that provides franchisees for people for the opportunity to get involved with them and really it's run by a bunch of different owners
Thor Freya
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lynnthefrenchtoast · 2 years
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🌱people with cold hands have warm hearts
lynn's kaebedo hc
cr: ir0nel on twt
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• i'm sure we all know the story of how kaeya obtained his vision is,, not the fondest of memories
• he probably thought he was going to die that day, he probably thought he deserved it.
• because he was a spy. a traitor. a monster.
• that day, once he survived, he couldnt have just gone home to diluc so he slept in mondstadt alleyways.
• mondstadt has a lot of stray dogs
• when one finds him, he looks at it with so much quiet awe, because yk even when youre at rock bottom dogs always know how to comfort you
• then he reaches out to pet it
• and it flinches away.
• and he knows, logically, its bc he has a cryo vision now and his hands were probably cold.
• but his mind screams at him; spy. traitor. monster.
• monster. monster. monster.
• kaeyas a very touchy person
• but since that day, hes never been able to casually touch someone without having them squirm at his cold hands
• and everytime, his mind screams at him; monster.
• kaeya will always hate that little part of himself that comes from khaenriah
• that part of him is truly a monster, he thinks.
• and then he meets albedo.
• khaenrian or not, albedos the prettiest thing hes ever seen.
• theyve barely interacted but albedo changed his whole world view bc suddenly khaenrian = bad but albedo = intelligent and witty and wonderful and-
• albedo = khaenrian???
• so.. khaenrian = not bad.
• so.. kaeya = not bad?
• SELF LOVE KAEYA, YES, UR ALLOWED TO LOVE URSELF
• kaeya doesnt make any attempts to befriend albedo even though theyre coworkers bc he just knows hes going to get attached
• ah. but when you have a cryo vision, your sensitivity to cold is significantly weakened. and when one of ur coworkers lives on an icy mountain.....,
• yea jean tasks kaeya with all the dragonspine-comissions and letters to albedo AHAHA THERES NO AVOIDING ALBEDO EVEN IF HE TRIES
• they become aquaintances. kaeya tries not to let their relationship go beyond anything but work.
• but then one day a mitachurl is too strong and it has an ice shield which means kaeyas attacks are basically useless against it and- yea.
• when albedo patches up his wounds, its too awkward not to make conversation so they do.
• its boring stuff abt the Knights and Mondstadt and Sucrose and then suddenly-
• "youre the only one who never complains about where i live, you know."
• and kaeyas like........ what????
• "dragonspine is a beautiful place, but deadly. the trek to my research lab is arduous- neither klee, nor sucrose, or even the traveller is fond of it. but i can't leave this place."
• "i'm just thankful everytime you deliver a message, you don't seem too annoyed."
• and its true. mostly for the fact that when kaeya makes it to albedos lab, hes excited he gets to admire the pretty alchemist's face.
• but he never thought it'd mean so much.
• and,, ah,, at the realization that hes special- that he means something to this really pretty alchemist he- er-
• "..are you blushing?"
• "no."
• kaeyas face feels really, really warm.
• see kaeya is good at flirting- not at genuine compliments on the insignificant little habits he has. hes horrible with those.
• but albedo just smiles, (wholly unfair by the way. HE SMILES?? HES ALREADY PRETTY NORMALLY THIS IS A WHOLE NEW LEVEL OF CHEATI-) takes his hand and offers him food
• kaeya's heart sinks and he looks at albedo.
• kaeya looks at him and waits.
• waits. waits for the realization, waits for albedo to flinch away, waits for the monster. monster. monster.
• nothing happens.
• albedo is a synthetic human (well, kaeya doesnt know that) so whether kaeyas hands are freezing cold or not, he wouldnt be able to tell.
• thats why albedo can live on dragonspine. he doesnt get cold. theyre the same.
• the same. theyre the same. and since theyre the same, if albedo isnt a monster- neither is kaeya.
• you gotta understand that kaeya hasnt been able to hold people in his arms ever since that day.
• kaeya is touch. starved. VERY MUCH SO.
• and albedos hand on his feels like fire.
• "is something wrong? youre spacing out."
• for a moment, kaeya forgets. the fight, how he got his vision, all the suffering afterwards-
• he forgets what it felt like to be a monster.
• and he never will be again.
• "..it's nothing."
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