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#ever after high fake tweets

rebelcharmings · 10 months

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raven’s road to getting tailor quick (taylor swift) EveRAfterS (eras) tour tickets: a mini twitter series

thankfully apple managed to ask tailor quick for one more ticket so now she, raven And dexter are going☺️and so apple is forced to thirdwheel for 3 hours. she managed to have fun tho even without darling!🥰

inspired by my post here and some of my own thoughts as a fellow swiftie who didn’t get tickets at first but now i do!!!

and here is part 1 of my fake tweets au !!

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angstintensifer · 18 days

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I made ever after high fake tweets. Credit to my friends @vielzahlislands & @erikascleves for some of the inspo on them

Will be making a part two so look out!

#ever after high #fake tweets #Dees eah fake tweets #Eah #briar beauty #faybelle thorn #raven queen #dexter charming #daring charming #darling charming #ashlynn ella #sparrow hood #cerise hood #ca cupid #blondie lockes

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thelarriefics · 4 months

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NEW YEARS FIC REC: Below you will find fics that take place during the New Year, or have scenes that center around it.

📖 Mistletoe's For Two by @ireallysawanangel (90k)

After an encounter in a coffee shop with the rudest man he's ever met, Louis hopes the city is just big enough that he'll never bump into him again. When he spots that man at a bar the following evening, a plan begins to form. They both need dates for their respective Christmas parties and decide to use each other for their own benefit. They'll help one another through the holidays and then 'break it off' on New Year's, then agree to never see each other again. Developing feelings was not part of the plan. Or, an enemies to lovers fake dating advent fic.

📖 Home For The Holiday by @larrysmomfics (86k)

A "The Holiday" inspired AU where Harry meets Louis after agreeing to swap houses with a stranger on the internet for three weeks over the holidays.

📖 like cranberries on a winter evening by @evilovesyou (57k)

Louis hates Christmas. With good reason, too. And no, he doesn’t want to talk about it. When research for his next novel leads Louis to the website of a quirky little hotel in Northumberland, there is exactly one room available for the two weeks that Louis really wants to get away from his family. Will the fairy lights, kind smiles, homemade pastries, and genuine friendships awaiting him in Harry Styles’ hotel be enough to cause Louis a change of heart?

📖 Baby, Won't You Look My Way? by @peachbootylouis (50k)

Or the where Louis’ routine centered life runs like clockwork until a chance hook up throws a wrench named Harry into it all. But as it may turn out a change in plans could be what Louis has needed all along.

📖 Cabin Fever by @germericangirl (46k)

One cabin, one bed, two ex-boyfriends. What could possibly go wrong?

📖 silver lining, perfect timing by @stylesthebrave (22k)

For as long as they've been friends, the whole world has been saying Louis and Harry should get over themselves and date already. It takes an impromptu winter holiday for Louis to admit that everyone else might have been right all along.

📖 as in olden days by @scrunchyharry (18k)

Château Frontenac hotel, Christmas 1925 When his father insisted the entire family spend Christmas abroad in one of his new investments, Harry dreaded the prospect of being trapped for weeks in the biting Canadian cold, so far away from the roaring excitement of his London life. As he crossed half of the world to be buried under a thick blanket of snow, he never imagined he would meet a charming bellhop who would do his best to keep him warm.

📖 I Can Build Your Heart A Home by @loveislarryislove (10k)

Or, Harry and Louis kind of secretly sort of dated in high school. Now it's two years later and they're both back in town for Christmas and it's awkward. Until it isn't.

📖 promise not to fade away by @nobodymoves (10k)

Louis is an A&R rep, and Harry is a singer/songwriter. They meet on New Years Eve.

📖 It's Thursday. Let's Get (un)Dressed. by @bananaheathen (9k)

When Louis is peer-pressured into downloading TikTok over the holidays, he fully expects to hate it. And he does hate it. All of it. Well... except for aspiring OOTD influencer, @harrystyles.

📖 I want your midnights by @guccistrawberries (8k)

or It all starts with a harmless round of the name game

📖 Happy New Life's! by @outofmycistem (5k)

If everything would work out perfectly, in case it didn't already happen until this point, they would be out in exactly 10 years. With a simple tweet of a picture and a 3 sentence text. Because it's as easy as that and even if they would forget about it, which they swore they wouldn't, it wouldn't be that much of a deal anyways, right? Or, the one where Harry and Louis (more or less) accidently come out with a tweet they planned 10 years ago.

📖 Know What You Need by @absoloutenonsense (4k)

Harry always thinks he knows what he needs, but Louis knows better.

📖 Rapture by @allwaswell16 (3k)

It was New Year's Eve in Victorian London, and a lonely vampire could no longer resist the stunning lamplighter he watched night after night. Or, a vampire Harry fic because what says the holidays like Victorian vampires?

📖 this far from mediocre by @louisandtheaquarian & @zaynmaliksmiddlefinger (2k)

In this scene, Louis meets Zayn for the first time at an industry party on New Year's Eve that Liam is DJ-ing. Oh, and Harry shows up too.

📖 Stroke of Twelve by @larry-hiatus (2k)

Or the one where Louis wants Harry to hold off his orgasm so they can come together at the stroke of twelve on New Year's Eve.

📖 anything for you, gorgeous by @track-five (1k)

after a long night of new years celebrations, louis somehow manages to get his boyfriend home in one giggly, clingy piece.

📖 a taste of bliss by @beckydoesthings (1k)

It's New Year's Eve, and Louis is working. As much as he hates it, there's a few benefits to working a holiday. One is the free champagne. The second may or may not come in the form of a curly haired sous chef named Harry.

#masterpost #new years fics #hlcreators #1dsource #hljournal

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allwaswell16 · 1 year

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One Direction fics that include social media into the fic as requested in this ask. If you enjoy the fics, please leave kudos and comments for the writers! You can find my other fic recs here. Happy reading!

—Harry/Louis—

♡ Your Mess Is Mine by amory

(M, 176k, kid fic) Louis is the father to the most brilliant little boy in the world who is all Louis really needs, or at least that's what he tells himself. Harry is a gorgeous boybander fresh off a two year break and a massive scandal that's left him a little broken and more than ready to move on.

♡ A Love Like War by sincewewereeighteen

(E, 173k, famous/not famous) the one in which Louis Tomlinson is a cliched rock star, he's got everything except for love. But then he meets Harry Styles; the man that, against all odds, saves him in every way a person can be saved, even when Louis didn't know he needed saving in the first place.

♡ Walk That Mile by purpledaisy / @daisyharry

(E, 149k, road trip au) A Route 66 AU where falling in love was never part of the plan.

♡ You You You by @isthatyoularry

(M, 137k, famous/not famous) the one where Harry and Louis meet at a club and Louis takes Harry home, only for him to realize that the boy who just made him breakfast half naked is Harry Styles from One Direction.

♡ Have Love, Will Travel by @kingsofeverything

(E, 97k, road trip au) Rather than spend the summer working at their desks, Louis and Harry are given the opportunity to crisscross the country together in a tiny camper, filming their adventures for a YouTube series.

♡ say you want me by orphan_account

(M, 37k, famous/not famous) Harry’s a closeted pop star and Louis is the uni student he keeps fighting with on Twitter

♡ From the Start by @allwaswell16

(E, 32k, fake relationship) Louis has no idea that one act of kindness will cause his life to spiral out of control. But that's what happens when his new friend fake proposes to him and a video of it goes viral.

♡ You're the Light by @allwaswell16

(E, 31k, newspaper au) What he finds on his first day of work is a tall, gorgeous editor named Harry who has the most beautiful green eyes he’s ever seen—and who also happens to be his new boss.

♡ The Daddiest Place on Earth by lovelarry10 / @chloehl10

(E, 23k, Disney World au) Louis. Harry. Instagram. A whole lot of confusion and a whole lot of laughs...

♡ Anonymous Said by @alivingfire

(T, 21k, tumblr) two boys, two blogs, two years of anonymous messages, and a bookshop where it all comes together

♡ Then We Talk Slow by @letsjustsee

(E, 20k, famous/not famous) A famous/non-famous AU in which Louis banters back and forth with his new record company on Twitter, only to find out that Harry is the man behind the tweets.

♡ blend into my favourite colour by rainbowninja167 / @rainbowtitania

(T, 19k, coffee shop) Harry is a barista with a secret Werewolf High fan blog, a desperate crush on a customer named Louis, and a best friend on Tumblr who always makes him laugh. Louis can't figure out why the barista at his favorite coffee shop keeps creepily staring at him, and to make matters worse, he may be slightly in love with a friend he met online.

♡ Found My Missing Piece by @styleandsin

(NR, 16k, fashion au) Louis and Harry are both fashion bloggers. Louis' been following Harry for years. Harry and his blog really gave him the confidence and the push to make his own.

♡ you don't have to play the part by fairytalelights / @lookslikefairytale

(M, 16k, famous/not famous) the one where Harry is Britain's new pop sensation, Louis is R&B star Zayn's sassy social media manager and things get confusing

♡ This is a Rainbow War by @lululawrence

(NR, 15k, famous/not famous) the one where Harry's a famous singer, Louis is part of his road crew, and after Harry gives Louis a special assignment regarding rainbow flags, things maybe turn out a little differently than either of them planned.

♡ it do be like that sometimes by wordsnnotes / @quelsentiment

(T, 14k, enemies to lovers) an enemies to lovers AU inspired by my short experience in this crazy fandom and my even shorter experience on stan Twitter

♡ from, your secret admirer by flicker_album / @niall-official

(T, 13k, secret admirer) the one where Louis is Harry's Tumblr crush so he sends him secret admirer messages for Valentine's Day

♡ Nailed By Louis by @haztobegood

(E, 9k, cooking au) It had started as a joke, just two months earlier. Louis had tried to make recipe from HarrySizzles Instagram account.

♡ Hot Chocolate by @kingsofeverything

(E, 6k, chocolatier Harry) Harry wants to make something new for Hot Chocolates, his small batch chocolate shop. Louis offers to help.

♡ Kiwi by dimpled_halo / @comebackassholes

(M, 6k, exes to lovers) The last place Louis expects to see Harry again after ten years is performing at a music festival in Chicago

♡ The Places Where We Met by Chelsea Frew / @chelsea-frew

(G, 5k, famous/not famous) Harry Styles loves his job as 1/3 of a famous boy band. It does, however, get lonely, and he counts on a special online friend to get him through.

♡ Missed Connection by @kingsofeverything

(E, 3k, Craigslist) Harry is absolutely clueless when it comes to figuring out if other guys are into him, so he enlists his friend Niall to assist. That may or may not be a mistake

—Rare Pairs—

♡ One In Ten Million by craigtrash

(M, 36k, Zayn/Liam) University student Zayn Malik is a big fan of One Direction, world famous boy band, especially member Liam Payne. When Liam accidentally tweets his phone number, Zayn takes a chance that changed his life.

♡ walk, walk fashion baby by @disgruntledkittenface

(E, 23k, Louis/Nick Grimshaw) Louis loves his supportive boyfriend, his passionate and interesting band of friends and coworkers, and his pair of quirky and dedicated dogs. What he doesn’t love is his job as co-editor of the Lifestyle section at a popular site aimed at millennials.

♡ Almost Feels Like Nothing's Changed at All (If You Close Your Eyes) by Hllangel / @glitterbootsandyellowshorts

(G, 3k, Louis/Nick Grimshaw) The tweet went out about two minutes ago, but it's basically blown up his notifications, and probably his life.

#1dficvillage #trackinghome #tracksintheam #hltracks #trackinghappily #1dsource #ficrec #social media fics

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dontmeantobepoliticalbut · 1 year

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Representative Lauren Boebert, a Colorado Republican, took to Twitter on Sunday afternoon to complain about the Black National Anthem being performed during the Super Bowl.

Actress Sheryl Lee Ralph is slated to perform "Lift Every Voice and Sing," colloquially known as the Black National Anthem, ahead of the Sunday night football game. The song, written more than 100 years ago, emerged as a rallying cry during the civil rights movement, according to the NAACP. The NFL began including the song in its games following the Black Lives Matter protests that occurred during the summer of 2020, but the move has faced backlash from some conservatives.

Boebert became the latest prominent Republican to criticize the National Football League (NFL) over the song's inclusion, which will be performed alongside the "Star-Spangled Banner" and "America the Beautiful." The GOP lawmaker accused the league of attempting to "divide" Americans by including the Black National Anthem in the performance lineup.

"America only has ONE NATIONAL ANTHEM," she tweeted. "Why is the NFL trying to divide us by playing multiple!? Do football, not wokeness."

Critics argued, however, that Boebert's tweet was more divisive than the inclusion of the performance. Condé Nast editor Luke Zaleski accused Boebert of "gaslighting" viewers.

"The gaslighting is the fact that she's using the concept of unity to divide. She's doing what she's accusing the NFL of. It's a fake grievance contrived to irk and produce the effect of further fracturing society," Zaleski tweeted.

"It's black history month. The song is meaningful to African Americans. It's also a historic game with 2 black quarterbacks, the first time ever. Get over yourself and your ridiculous white grievances. If you don't like it, don't watch. Simple," another Twitter user tweeted on Sunday in response to Boebert.

Other conservatives have previously criticized the NFL over the song. In 2021, Fox News host Sean Hannity decried a performance as an attempt to "inject politics into sports." Several conservative pundits also complained when Vanessa Williams performed the song during a PBS Fourth of July special that same year.

WHAT IS THE BLACK NATIONAL ANTHEM?

NAACP leader James Weldon Smith first wrote "Lift Every Voice and Sing" in 1900. His brother, John Rosamond Johnson, composed the music for its lyrics, according to the NAACP.

The song was first performed by students at a segregated school in Jacksonville, Florida, to celebrate the birthday of President Abraham Lincoln, who presided over the emancipation of slaves during the American Civil War, according to the NAACP.

The song became a landmark of African American culture. According to Time magazine, it was performed during meetings in which civil rights leaders planned the Montgomery Bus Boycott and has been quoted in speeches by Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Following the 2020 racial protests after the murder of George Floyd at the hands of police, the NFL sought to confront what many players have described as systemic racism following years of protests.

NFL spokesman Brian McCarthy told The New York Times in 2021 that the inclusion of the song is "an opportunity to highlight messages that are important to the league, players and personnel and our communities."

"We've seen tremendous work done by our players to make an impact, and we can increase that through the high-visibility platform that the NFL provides," he said.

Newsweek reached out to Boebert's press office for further comment.

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mariacallous · 3 months

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Right then, while you fumble for your credit cards, I will talk about the rise of fakery: fake news, fake images, fake audio, fake politics.

Let me begin with someone I know. I admire Michela Wrong enormously. She does what journalists are meant to do: she afflicts the comfortable and comforts the afflicted.

Her beat was Africa, and Michela spent her career puncturing the West’s illusions about its rulers.

After Paul Kagame’s forces overthrew Rwanda’s genocidal Hutu regime in 1994, the world wanted to believe in a fairy story. The mass murder of Rwanda’s Tutsi population would be followed by peace, reconciliation and justice, it thought, as it threw praise and money at Kagame’s government.

Rwanda became the darling of the global aid industry. Under New Labour and the Tories, Kagame was feted.

Now our Conservative government declares that Rwanda is such a serene and safe country, Britain can dump asylum seekers there without the smallest concern for their safety or the faintest suspicion that corrupt officials will siphon off taxpayers’ money.

It was such a compelling story. Kagame and his idealistic group of young rebel fighters overthrow a genocidal regime ushering in an era of peace and stability. Under his leadership Rwanda became the West’s donor darling, hailed as Africa’s “Switzerland” or “Singapore”

The compelling story was also such balls. Michela exposed the lies, and has suffered a campaign of terrifying vilification as a result.

As AI and deep fake technology advance, not only journalists, politicians and celebrities, but potentially all of us can suffer equally ferocious attacks as calumny becomes ever easier to manufacture.

But first let me tell you what happened to Michela, then I will move on to the wider implications.

Her Do Not Disturb, and what a sweet title that was for a book about comfortable myths, was published in 2021.

She looked at the regime’s pursuit of opposition leaders, human rights activists and journalists. She showed how its critics were beaten and cowed into silence. And how, in the most high-profile cases, they “disappeared,” never to be seen again.

Michela has had her own punishment beating

Writing in this morning’s Observer she described how the regime hired a British PR company to coordinate the online hate attacks. She expected abuse after the book was published but….

What followed still took my breath away. A tide of vilification, expressed in petition form, on specially created websites, in pseudonymous Amazon reviews, and spread by literally hundreds of anonymous social media accounts. Almost all ignored the topic of my book – Kagame’s extraterritorial assassination campaign – while repeating certain tropes. I’d always taken it as read I would be accused of racism. What was extraordinary, though, for a journalist who reported on the 1994 genocide for Reuters and the BBC, was to be accused of “genocide denial”. But there was method in this malevolence. Genocide denial is now an accusation hurled at pretty much any government critic – including members of Kagame’s minority Tutsis who lost loved ones during the genocide. But it’s a crime in Rwanda, carrying a potential 10-year sentence, so I could in theory be arrested if I boarded a plane touching down in Kigali. When a Brussels restaurant owner cancelled my event after a tsunami of tweets and emails, I wondered if I even needed to worry about being arrested in Belgium. Rwandan government supporters have pushed for the EU’s laws on Holocaust denial to embrace supposed “negationists” like me.

Michela now wakes screaming in the night. Her nightmares convince her that Rwandan agents have broken into her flat.

“In the morning, I sometimes find chairs, duvets and pillows stuffed against the front door: my anxiety has bubbled up in my sleep. A therapist would probably mutter ‘PTSD’.”

As everyone who has been on the receiving end of hate campaigns knows, they work. Years of accusations that Michaela is a “racist” and “genocide denier” meant that…

“Anyone thinking of inviting me to speak at a conference or write an article will, on Googling my name, be presented with a list of accusations only the most stout-hearted – or those who know Rwanda – will casually brush away.”

The experience of Michela Wrong will become commonplace. Here without me needing to go out of my way to find them is a selection of stories from the past few days

Millions of people came across fake sexually explicit AI-generated images of Taylor Swift on social media. The White House Press Secretary told ABC News the Biden administration was "alarmed" by what happened to Swift online and that Congress "should take legislative action."

As it turns out, there is no federal law in the U.S. that would prevent or deter someone from creating and sharing non-consensual deepfake images. But there is a profitable commercial industry that thrives on creating and sharing digitally manufactured sexual content.

Do not think that fakery is confined to the famous

Yesterday the Times told the story of Helen Mort. In 2020 she found a fake porn film with images of her face taken from social media. Like Micheala she was horrified. She was even more horrified when she discovered that “an estimated 95 per cent of deepfakes online are non-consensual porn featuring women”.

As in the US, there is no single criminal offence in England and Wales that governs the taking, making and sharing of intimate images without consent.

On Thursday digital forensic investigators in Germany uncovered a vast, pro-Russia disinformation campaign against the Berlin government. It used tens of thousands of fake accounts on the social media platform X to attack Germany’s support for Ukraine. Russia generated more than 1m German-language posts from an estimated 50,000 fake accounts. They were dispatched at a rate of two every second.

On Friday Scientific American reported on how artificial intelligence was creating fake tapes of high school principals giving racist speeches. It also automatically generated calls, apparently from Joe Biden, urging citizens not to vote.

“Society,” the journal concluded, “may be woefully unprepared to deal with the resulting inevitable wave of digital fraud and the looming implication that any media item could be fraudulent.”

I don't know where that may in Scientific American’s conclusion came from. Society clearly is woefully unprepared,

Hany Farid, a computer science professor at the University of California described how the malicious actors held all the cards. It was incredibly easy to perpetrate a fraud, he explained.

“I record a person and clone their voice. And then I record myself saying what I want them to say with all the intonation—bad words and all—and it converts my voice into their voice. It’s all the same underlying generative AI technology.”

When it came to uncovering fraud, however…

“Detection is harder because it’s subtle; it’s complicated; the bar is always moving higher. I can count on one hand the number of labs in the world that can do this in a reliable way. That’s disconcerting.”

The falsely accused teachers will find it very hard to clear their name. While those who want to believe malicious fakery will feel justified in doing so.

As well as the innocent being falsely accused, the guilty will be able to say that they are innocent victims and AI generated the evidence against them.

As the technology for fakery explodes, and as states like Rwanda that no one believed capable of running propaganda operations and character assassination campaigns try to distort debate, the question arises what do we do.

I disagree with many of my fellow free-speech defenders who think that little or nothing should be done. We cannot go on with the Clinton era dispensation, which gave legal immunities to tech companies, without the rule of law falling into disrepute.

Everyone caught up in fake news attacks is baffled by the shortage of legal remedies against the AI companies that are profiting from their misery.

But clearly the law can only go so far. A deep fake outfit based in Northern Cyprus or some other bad land is effectively beyond the rule of law.

It strikes me that there are two possible futures.

The first isn’t so bad. People just shrug when dirt is thrown. They assume the evidence poisonous ideologues and movements use against their hate objects is fake. Or they follow the “ye without sin cast the first stone” principle. Or, and you can see this happening now, they say that when so many are attacked or are capable of being attacked, once shocking accusations lose their sting.

The second is, I am afraid, as likely.

Every election is swamped with fake news. The defeated side refuses to accept that they lost in a free-and-fair contest. High levels of trust, on which contented and prosperous societies depend, collapse. As more of us become like Michela Wrong and fear the power of the new technologies to destroy us, the more suspicious our world becomes.

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jewishbarbies · 7 months

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I noticed that you were also anti Selena Gomez ( I don’t personally care for her myself) and was wondering if you could do a quick run down as to why you’re an anti of her. I see so much prizes for her that it’s nice to see the other perspective every once and a while,

I was never really a fan of her as a person bc I just wasn’t into her music enough to look into her much, but I really started to dislike her when francia raisa came out and said selena basically pressured her into giving her the kidney she donated. the doctor told selena they were a match before francia and then she felt obligated because selena expected she would donate, and then they had a falling out after the surgery bc selena just didn’t talk to her. selena was able to go back to living her life and francia had to go through her body learning to live without a kidney, and selena didn’t mention her publicly until people online were upset with how she handled it, and then magically she talks about how thankful she is to francia specifically. there was some vague shade being thrown from francia online that made it seem like she felt selena was fake. I think since then, according to selena, they’ve reconnected. but the whole thing left a bad taste in my mouth.

then to add, she dated the now outed misogynist the weekend, and it sounds like he almost gave her his kidney as well and then wrote about feeling used because she dumped him shortly after. all she ever does is talk about how much she loves taylor and complains about people on the internet that don’t like her, because apparently she’s paying attention to all of it and, unlike taylor, comes right out and openly brings it up. but not in a boundary drawing way, more like a bunch of vague tweets about taking the high ground when she’s clearly not by getting involved anyway. she’s also friends with a lot of problematic people just like taylor and her circle, and she had a scandal where she slutshamed women for posting on insta and then backtracked claiming she “never said that” when it’s hard NOT to get that from what she said. she’s just another mean girl honestly.

#Asks #anonymoose #anti selena gomez

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chlodriendump · 2 years

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The Stages of Fake Dating

23-year-old Chloe's about to launch a new make-up collection in 3 months, but a certain incident begins to put a dent in her reputation so her PR manager decides that dating Paris' golden boy would help boost up her image. Meanwhile, Adrien's getting sick of being forced by his father to go on blind dates so he does the only thing he thinks would put a stop to it...agree to fake date his childhood friend (who he hasn't spoken with since high school).

1. The Plan

"Hey, that guy was practically harassing me for a stupid selfie!" Chloe defended as they got out of the elevator.

"Even so, the public seems to think otherwise." Julia, her PR manager, hands her a tablet showing a bunch of tweets calling her names she's heard a lot back in high school.

She sighs. "And you actually think dating someone is the best way to fix this?"

"Not just someone," Julia says, leading her into one of the meeting rooms.

Her eyes instantly land on a familiar face she wasn't expecting to see in person ever again.

"Adrien?" She lifts her sunglasses up to do a double-take and looks back and forth between him and Julia until realization dawned on her. "Oh, for fuck's sake."

2. The Act

"Is that gonna be alright with you?" Adrien, being the gentleman he is, needed her permission.

"Jesus, Adrien, we're not fourteen. Yes, you can hold my hand for this," Chloe assures him, putting her hand out.

"Hey, just want to make sure my girlfriend's comfortable." He teases before taking her hand in his.

"Still Paris' golden boy, huh?" She snorts, trying to mask the fact that something in her stirred when he called her his girlfriend and held her hand. She doesn't exactly know what those feelings are, but resolves not to dwell on it.

"I really missed you, Chlo," he says, smiling genuinely at her.

"I missed you too," she replies, returning the smile.

They continue walking along the sidewalk, pretending not to notice the paparazzi across the street.

3. Getting Closer

"Is it just me or did my father seem too happy when he found out we were 'together'?" Adrien asks, making the other blonde laugh.

After getting suffocated with questions about their 'relationship', they decided to get some fresh air on the balcony.

"He's probably relieved he doesn't have to annoy all his rich friends to set you up with their daughters anymore," she says.

As the laughter dies down, hints of tention and awkwardness fill the air; both having so much to say, but not knowing where to start.

Five years worth of events probably couldn't be covered properly in one night.

"Why'd you stop talking to me?" he blurts out, keeping his eyes on anywhere but her.

"I just wanted to forget high school," she explains. "Fresh start, you know?"

"You could've confided in me, I always got your back," he says, finally looking back at her.

"I'm sorry." It's the only response that seemed right. She doesn't notice that she mindlessly starts playing with one of the many bracelets on her wrists, but he does.

"Is that the one me and my mother gave you for one of your birthdays?" He gently pulls her arm close to inspect it.

"Yeah..."

"You kept it all this time?"

"Of course I did."

For two people who haven't spoken in years, the following conversations certainly didn't make it feel that way any longer.

4. Falling for Each Other

"So, you're buying her this ridiculously overpriced teddy bear because..?" Nino asked, eyeing said stuffed animal that Adrien just picked up from the shelf.

"Because she lost her old one and I'm a good friend," Adrien says matter-of-factly.

"In secret? With no cameras to capture the romantic gesture?"

"It's...personal." Adrien adjusts his hood and shades, looking around to make sure no one noticed him.

"Now, if this was a romcom, remind me again how two people fake dating figure out they caught feelings?" Nino smirks and crosses his arms.

"Well..." Adrien tries listing things in his mind, "They can't stop thinking about the person, they're excited to spend time with them, they do a lot of nice things for them even when it has nothing to do with their fake..."

"Mhmm."

"Shit."

"Yep."

-----

"You're awfully happy to see your phone," Julia says as she enters Chloe's office.

"Shut up, Adrien just texted me something funny," Chloe defends before another giggle escapes her.

"Ah, makes sense." Julia smirks.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Chloe looks at her suspiciously.

"You like him."

"I don't." Her denial only makes the other woman grin.

"I've witnessed the entire disaster that was your love life." Chloe shoots her a glare. "And not once have I seen you smile like that."

"Fuck."

"Yep."

5. Making it Real

"Before this all ends, I just needed you to know that eventually..." He pauses out of fear that she may not want anything to do with him afterwards. "It became real for me."

She takes a step closer to him.

"It was real for me too."

Bonus:

Everyone in the office erupted in cheers after they kiss because they totally knew Chlodrien would end up together after the first month of fake dating.

#chlodrien #adrien agreste #chloe bourgeois #my art #chloe x adrien #miraculous ladybug #miraculous #miraculous au #It's 3AM I got lazy to color LOL #If anyone wants to tweak/finish this fic pls go ahead <3 #most probably an AU with no miraculous #fic

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gentlelandingplace · 1 year

Text

You know, the first message I saw of Technoblade’s death was from Instagram. I was sat on my couch in my family room, with my little sister in earshot. I opened the app because I was bored. The first post I was someone was posting their thoughts and how they felt uncomfortable continuing to do art of him.

I thought it was a sick joke or something, I genuinely didn’t understand what was going on. Dread filled me as I turned off my phone and hurriedly went downstairs to my room. I sat on my bed and quickly hopped onto YouTube to check what was happening. The top video was a completely black thumbnail with the title “so long nerds”. It was only 3 minutes long.

Part of me was still in disbelief, and my head began to fill with foggy static as I started the video. Technodad introduced himself and began to relay Techno’s final message.

By this point I understood that it wasn’t a joke. I started to cry, harder than I’d ever cried I think. In the moment there was a part of me thinking “why are you crying so hard??”. I couldn’t breathe and I could barely understand what Technodad was saying.

I hardly made it to the end of the video before I turned off my phone and ran back up the stairs. My mom had sat on our couch in the time I’d left, but the moment she saw my face she stood up. She could tell that something was extremely wrong and quickly asked me what had happened. I couldn’t speak for a second and she asked again twice in a panicked voice.

I just turned my phone around and through my tears said “it’s real, it’s not fake or a joke, it’s real.” She took my phone and relieved sympathy washed over her face. As much as I had wanted her to calm down, her relief shattered something in me that needed comfort. She later explained that she thought something had happened to my best friend, who was across the country at the time. She knew about Techno’s cancer, but other than that only knew that I cared a lot about him.

I told my little sister to check YouTube. She did and cried. My mom called my little sibling to let them know I was picking them up from their friend’s house. I picked them up and had them watch the video on the car ride home with earbuds in. The silence in the car was so heavy I could barely think.

By this time I’d stopped heavily crying, but I couldn’t stop individual tears from coming every couple minutes. When we got home my little sibling didn’t speak or respond to anything I said. I got the message that they needed some space and went inside. They joined me a few minutes later.

We all cried together, and I quietly asked mom if I could please get a hoodie. My mom did it for the charity, but I’m still a little embarrassed to say that I did it because I wanted a comfort item. Which it is to me, I still wear it most days.

There wasn’t much of a point to this story other than to say that my grief was and still is real. I went back to rewatch the video (because I missed a lot of information my first watch through) and ugly cried again. It’s not stupid that I felt his loss, it’s not silly that I’m still mourning him.

Technoblade was someone I admired a lot. I got to know him through past live streams, YouTube videos, tweets, compilations, and specifically his skywars episodes (I’ve been rewatching the un-privated ones). I genuinely think I’ve consumed hundreds of hours of his content.

Before his death I found him funny and good background for Hollow Knight playing. After his death I still find him funny, but I also see his content as extremely comforting.

I just want to say this: thank you Alex for choosing to become Technoblade. Thank you for showing us who you were and sharing your fantastically wonderful self with us. We loved you, more than any of us even realized. We miss you dearly.

Fly high and rest well king

#ai generated art #Technoblade #Technoblade never dies #technodad #mourning #parasocial relationships #thank you Technoblade

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accidentalharrie · 2 years

Note

it’s clear flo doesn’t like olivia and isn’t enthused about this movie nor is she wanting to promote it or associate herself with it at all. idk why you guys think you need to kiss olivia’s ass just cuz she’s dating harry…she’s actually not a good person. she’s very very problematic including transphobic, ableist, racist and downright sexist. a fake feminist if i’ve ever seen one. PR or not, she’s not a good person. Idc if she’s dating harry or just in a PR relationship you don’t have to pretend to like her just cuz she’s associated with harry. If they are dating? cool. that’s kinda sad cuz she’s awful and harry deserves better but if it’s PR? also cool. who cares? she’s still not a good person and it will run it’s course. Some of you have god complexes, feeling the need to act all high and mighty by pretending to like her as if it makes you the superior fans. It doesn’t. I’m not a larrie and I don’t like her, because i have morals and she lacks them, so i have no respect for people like her.

Oh, sorry, did I miss your first two asks, after you spent so much time stringing all of these nonsense thoughts together?

I promise you I could go problematic incident for problematic incident between Harry and Olivia if you're going to insist on cherry-picking ten-year-old tweets.

OR we could look at the source of most of your "proof", some obsessed weirdo on twitter who is literally a Trump loving, racist, sexist, TERF homophobe. Update your morals and grow the fuck up, kiddo.

#trying to remember the last time i was so over this place #oh and anon i blocked you via the third stupid ask so don't bother coming back #i mean it when i say grow up #this is v v depressing #asks

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milonavarroo · 10 months

Text

IC TASK 005: THE HART OF THE MATTER

There was one reason Milo was here, and one reason only. And that was his own public image. News was spreading more and more outside of Ogden and the surrounding area about Greer being missing, about Penny's death. He'd started getting questions about it. Fans tweeting at him with questions - especially the ones who followed him closely enough to put together that 'Greer Morrison' was the girl who had been his tennis partner. He'd shared tons of pictures of them on his instagram. Sports reporters asking if he could give some insight on what was happening. Things like that. He hadn't, yet, of course. He thought it would be a really bad fucking idea. His team agreed as well.

However, the more publicity this situation was getting the less he could remain silent on it. That was what his team had said. Especially with how poorly his interrogation with the police had gone. No one knew about it. Yet. But how long until they did? He had to get in front of this. Do this interview with a popular daytime TV personality and be on his best behavior. Make people sympathetic, and whatever the cops ended up saying, if they ever ended up saying anything, would not effect his public image.

That was the plan. "Good afternoon," he said, as he took a seat across from Donovan Hart, a pleasant (and fake) smile on his face. He'd been doing things like this since he was about sixteen years old. This shouldn't be a problem.

“It’s a tough year to be a student at Ogden College with the tragic passing of Penelope Klein. And of course, we can’t forget the ongoing missing persons case surrounding beloved student, Greer Morrison. I know that Dean Zuko insisted on free on-campus counseling set up for all students. Have you made use of it?”

"I am already seeing somebody," Milo said, slowly, giving a bit of a smile. He had been seeing a therapist since he was 16 and his public image went into the toilet after throwing a tennis racket so hard into a fence it smashed. His PR agent told him he needed to make a show of 'getting better', so that was what he'd done. Turns out … he kinda fucking needed it, so he kept going even after the storm had passed. "Mental health is very important to me," at least that was the line he'd been given, "so, I think it's a great idea to offer it to students who are unable to see professionals out of pocket. I'm sure they've been busy." He doubted anybody who really needed the help was actually spending their time making use of any on campus counseling. Frankly, he wouldn't trust the people the Dean had hired for it anyway. He doubted they were really prepared for the problems that Ogden students had to offer.

“There was that nasty storm that knocked out the power at the resort, I remember. That got a little dicey, huh? Parents and staff all congregated in the faculty chalet, but you kids were on the other side of the resort. We’ve been told that Penelope organized some things for people to complete to make it through that night together. Were you one of them? What did you get up to during the blackout?”

"Yes, I was partnered with Ollie Inoue to go check the kitchen pantry for supplies," Milo explained. As long as he was being tossed these softball questions then maybe this wasn't going to be too terrible. He was getting the strong feeling Donovan Hart was phoning it in, anyway. "We didn't know how long any of this was going to last, and there was the possibility of us getting snowed in. So, Penny wanted to make sure that we were stocked up on food in case the worst happened."

“In the wake of tragedy, it can be hard to recall things in detail. The brain has its own ways of protecting itself in high-stress situations, and I know that the police have been a near-constant presence on campus this year. This is not that; I want you to feel safe and comfortable enough to share whatever you want about that night. Did you see anything? Hear anything?”

Yes. Milo didn't say that though. But yes, he had heard something. He'd heard footsteps, and he heard someone closing the door on him and Ollie to lock them in the pantry together. He thought about it often. What was the real reason for that? Had somebody been trying to make sure there was no possibility of witnesses for whatever happened to Penny? Milo hadn't mentioned any of those thoughts though, because … Well, he didn't want to get involved. And the last person he was going to tell about it was Donovan fucking Hart. "No," Milo said with a casual smile, "Ollie can be pretty chatty, so mostly I just heard him talking."

“Obviously, we all want to get to the bottom of this and work through whatever lingering effects it might have left behind. If you were paired off with anyone that night, can you remember what they were doing? Would it have been possible that they might have been behind anything you saw?

"Not possible," Milo said, simply. Not even in any stretch of the imagination. "Ollie and I weren't let out of the pantry until the lights turned back on. We were together the whole time."

“Now, if you’ll direct your attention to this screen here, I have something that— barring appropriate authorities— no one has seen until now.” A picture of Greer suddenly appears on screen, all eyes trained on this new piece of information. All eyes but Donovan’s which are locked onto the face of the person he’s interviewing, watching for any and every reaction. “This photo is shocking, I know. It was found in the faculty chalet the night of the blackout. Do you know anything about the day it was taken or who might have taken it?”

Milo was not the sort of person who hid his feelings well. That made the fact he'd been strong armed into this interview by his team extremely unfortunate, because he was supposed to be making himself look good in the court of public opinion. It didn't matter what the police thought if everyone else thought he was an innocent bystander. Which he was! But it meant that he had to keep his anger in check. He knew how these things went. He knew how much in interviews ended up on the cutting room floor just to show what the producers and people in charge wanted to show. Milo knew how these things always went, which was why he hadn't wanted to do this in the first place. Unfortunately here he was, and now he just had to make sure that he didn't give them anything that could be used against him in any way what so ever.

There was a difference between knowing something intellectually, and being able to follow through with that thing, however.

There was that hot feeling of anger that flashed through Milo. Outraged that anyone thought it was a good idea to do this. Show that picture, or do this interview. "How the fuck would I know?" Milo snapped. "Isn't more likely that you or one of the faculty members must have taken and vandalized it? If that's where it was found." Why was this on the shoulders of him, or his peers at all?

“Do you have any idea why this photo might have been left with faculty that night? Or, most pressing, what reason someone could have for vandalizing it in such a horrible way?”

Milo glared at this joke of a fucking TV personality in front of him. "Ask. The. Faculty," he said through his teeth.

"Finally, it's been discovered that Penelope, shortly before her untimely death, had mentioned to someone that she knew why Greer had left. Do you think that has anything to do with this photo? Do you know why she might have left? Even though being honest about it may seem scary, I promise you, it's the right thing to do. It's the only way we can protect you."

'It's the only way we can protect you.' "What are you the fucking cops?" Milo snapped again, unable to help himself though he knew the moment it left his mouth it should not have. "This interview is over. I know bad faith questions when I hear them, I know when I'm being steamrolled. Don't fuck me with, Donovan." He said, standing up from his seat and heading about as far as he could get away before he was stopped by some staff to remove his mic, and whatever else they needed.

#{ ic task #{ task #ogdenictask #{ self para

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detroit-grand-prix · 1 year

Text

Wildest Dreams Chapter 25 - Holy Ground, Part 1

Chapter summary: Bee has been pushing all season towards one goal - doing well at her first-ever home Grand Prix in Austin, Texas, but she feels the pressure building, and a lot of things are changing.

Content warning: N/A

Chapter word count: 6,009

Author's Notes: This is the beginning of the end of the main story arc. This chapter had to be split into two parts because it was so long. I started planning this story in May and finished it in August, and I had a ton of fun writing it out. I'd grown attached to it to the point where I am still writing little one-off chapters and side stories for it. Anyway, not too many notes this chapter, other than the elements from Bee's custom helmet. The Spirit of Detroit statue, which is one of my favorite landmarks in Detroit. The We Can Do It! poster, which you will definitely be familiar with if you're from the US. Maybe even if you're not, it's a pretty iconic image by now. I also referenced it in one of the Monza chapters, in one of the fake tweets. Super Bee logo - The Super Bee was a muscle car produced by Dodge for a few years in the 60's and 70's, and then they brought the model name back for a trim package for the Dodge Charger in the late 2000's. I think the emblem is cute, but I don't know if Bee would have to get permission to use the emblem on her helmet or not, but this is fanfiction, so I can do what I want (within reason).

Grove, Oxfordshire, England, United Kingdom Mid-September 2021

The season was just over halfway through, and Bee was starting to feel the pressure of meeting her goal of getting on the podium. She’d been so close. God, so close. She finished as high as fifth. It was in Monza, of course, which she thought was her best chance, and it would have worked, and it would have been second if she hadn’t screwed up timing on the safety car after the crash that took Lewis and Max out of the race. She and George tried to double-stack to change tires, but she was a few seconds too late to come out into the pits in second and couldn’t manage to make up the places she’d lost.

The worst part was it wasn’t her crew’s fault - she was concentrating so hard on making a good exit that she somehow missed the green light from the pit. She’d never seen anyone do that, let alone her. She felt awful.

She felt like she’d blown the opportunity with the two main podium contenders out. The frustration rattled her harder than she expected it to.

At least George had managed to secure a podium before that, in Belgium. There was barely a race run, but George put on a spectacular qualifying in the rain, qualifying in P2. They ended up only racing for two full laps, and the top 10 finishers were only awarded half points, but it was Williams’ first podium since 2012. On the bright side, Williams was an astounding sixth in the constructor’s championship now. It was their highest placement in years, and meant hundreds of millions in prize money for the team. The year before Bee joined, they weren’t even able to score a single point, now they were absolutely a midfield team.

It was a bittersweet occasion, though, because three days before, George had signed with Mercedes for the 2022 season. It was announced a week later, but Toto had told Bee already, because they were starting discussions for her contact for the next year as well.

“I’m really happy for him.” She told Toto. “He absolutely deserves it, but… I’m a little selfish and will miss being on a team with him.”

“Well, in a way, you are still on a team with him - that is what I told him when he had his incident with Valtteri earlier this year. You’re still a Mercedes driver.”

“I know, but it's not going to be quite the same, but I’m more excited for him than I am sad for me, trust me.”

As far as her contract with Williams, Bee opted to only seek another one-year agreement. She was starting to feel like her career had an expiration date that was sooner than most drivers, and she wasn’t sure how she would get along with the incoming team principal, who was Williams’ current CEO, Jost Capito.

She hadn’t actually worked with him very much, not yet. He seemed like an amenable guy. He was German, and had come from the world of rally car racing. The person that was originally tapped to be Claire’s replacement had backed out, so Jost decided to absorb his role and be CEO and Team Principal instead of hiring someone else. At least he was going to be hands-on.

The only alternative that Bee was willing to confront was if Lewis won his 8th WDC at the end of the season, surpassed Schumacher’s record, and retired. The sport would be bereft without Lewis, of course, but Bee would certainly be in consideration for his spot. Not that she could ever think to replace Lewis Hamilton or even start to fill his shoes, but an open seat at Mercedes would be an open seat at Mercedes.

Some drivers would take a seat for any team that would have them - they just want to race, and they don’t care who’s name is on the car. Bee wasn’t one of them. She only wanted to stay in the sport if she could represent Mercedes. She knew she wouldn’t be happy elsewhere.

She had a session with Natalie after Monza. Emilia suggested it - she’d noticed that Bee was on edge after that weekend, and it had apparently been a while since she’d had a check-in with her therapist.

“You know that your performance is as much mental as it is physical, and I know you’re not at your best right now. It couldn’t hurt, at least before we leave for Sochi.” Emilia said gently. They’d just had a training session, but Bee had almost gone overboard trying to work out her frustration. Emilia only had her stop because she was afraid of Bee injuring herself.

“Okay, you’re right.” She said, trying to catch her breath. “I’ll call her later.”

“I just… I can’t believe I fucked up like that.” Bee said to Natalie on FaceTime. “I was concentrating so hard on trying to get away from the pit as fast as possible - like, how hard is it to focus for literally three seconds? But I looked away for a fraction of a second and it was already too late.”

“That’s tough. I know in F1 those little margins matter, but… if I remember, you got 5th in that race, right? Isn’t that still one of your best results?”

“Actually it is my best result in Formula 1. But I’m mad because if I hadn’t lost focus, I would’ve come out in the pit in 2nd place. And my goal this season is to get on the podium. And it was Monza! If I was going to get on the podium anywhere, Monza would be ideal - and Lewis and Max crashed each other out, so it seemed perfect. I mean, I don’t know how long I have left in this sport, and I don’t want to leave without feeling like I haven’t accomplished anything.” Bee said.

“Ah, okay, that’s something. What makes you say that you haven’t accomplished anything? As far as I know, you’ve accomplished quite a lot. You’re the first woman in a long time to make points finishes, first American woman to race in F1 - I think that’s -”

Bee interrupted her. “I mean, yeah. Okay. That’s all fine and well, but if I weren’t a woman, I would be having an incredibly mediocre career so far, but because I am, everything I’ve done is groundbreaking.” She was getting annoyed. She felt a surge of frustration creeping up the back of her skull, like a series of pinpricks.

“Would you, though? I don’t think anyone other than, say, Lewis and Max was any good in their first few seasons. You even outscored your own teammate - you managed a point in your first season, and he didn’t, and he’s considered a potential world champion.”

“I know, but the car he had to try to compete in was way worse than the one I got in my first season.”

“I still think you’re underestimating yourself. But I’m also hearing a few things here. Number one is that you don’t to be remembered just because you’re a woman, which I think is very fair, but in a sport like this, that is a significant barrier to overcome, and I think it has required a lot more than people realize. Think about it this way - do you think anybody would know who Max Verstappen is if he was a woman?” Natalie said.

“Probably not.” Bee conceded.

“Right, because he didn’t have the kind of hurdle you did to get into this sport in the first place. And you think Susie is a good racing driver, right?”

“Yeah, of course.” Bee said, like it was a foregone conclusion. “I’ve seen her lap times, her telemetry data, her onboards, she definitely knew what she was doing. If she was racing now, she’d be better than almost a quarter of the grid.”

“Right. Of course. But Bee, even she couldn’t surmount the walls you have. I grant you, she has helped you a lot in your career, so she boosted you over that wall. Plus, I think timing was more on your side than it was hers, but I’m just saying - you’ve overcome a lot of things that not everyone would be able to, and I think that’s what makes your career so far exceptional.”

Natalie sounded absolutely solid in her conviction, to the point where Bee forgot she was her therapist for a moment.

“The season is not over yet, and you’ve come within striking distance of a podium. So, you made a mistake. Every driver has. Some people make even bigger mistakes - at least all you lost was a split-second of a pit exit. Do you remember what happened when Lewis forgot to remove that... brake… magic… thing? I don’t know what it was. But, in Baku this year? He didn’t even finish in the points. Some drivers have even made mistakes that have destroyed their entire car. A few seconds on a pit exit seems like nothing in comparison, right?”

Bee laughed. “Now you actually sound like a sports analyst. But, okay. I get your point. You’re right. The season’s not over.”

“Is there another race you’d want to aim for the podium for? Surely Monza wasn’t -”

“Austin. The US Grand Prix. How amazing would that be? To be the first woman on an F1 podium, as an American driver, in America? I’ve always wanted to… but we didn’t race there last year, and F2 never raced there.” Bee was resolute.

“That sounds like a good plan. It’s a home race for you, it might be easier to get a good result with a home crowd.” Natalie said, thoughtfully. “I know in other sport, home-court advantage really can swing things. I’m not sure how it affects you drivers, though.”

“I think it does make a difference, honestly.” Bee said. “I think that’s why Lewis always manages to do so well in Silverstone, truthfully. And also speaking of Austin… This was a long time ago, but do you remember me telling you about that woman, on the airplane? It was way back in 2016, I think. The one who said she was my first fan? That was on my way back from the US. I always think about that. I think that was one of the first times I realized that I was on the right track.”

“Oh, I do remember you telling me about that. You should see if you can track her down, maybe, and see if she’s going to the race. I’m sure she’d love to see you again.”

“Natalie, that’s genius.”

“What is?”

“We have a limited number of paddock passes we can give out to guests, as drivers, and I gave you one for Silverstone this year, and I’m giving some to my parents for the US GP, but I think I still have a couple to use, so if I can track her down, I can give her one.”

“Oh, that’s a great idea. She shouldn’t be impossible to find, right? You know her first name, at least, and approximately where she lives. This isn’t a big country. But, you have to hurry.” Natalie said.

Bee went home that night and put in her best efforts on Google trying to find the Adelle that lived in Leeds that shared that flight with her. Apparently “Adelle” was a more common forename in the UK than she’d anticipated, but she had narrowed it down to a few options, until she got lucky on LinkedIn, of all places. She recognized the woman from her profile picture, and she still had the same bright red hair. Once she had a surname, finding an address was easy. Hopefully it was still current.

When she went to the factory in Grove the next day, Bee put together a package of Williams items - two shirts, a hat, and a keychain, along with a letter and two paddock passes, two of her collectible driver cards, both signed.

Dear Adelle,

I don’t know if you remember me, but we shared a flight together five years ago, coming back to London from the Mexican Grand Prix in 2016. I told you I was a junior driver for an F1 team, and was trying to find a feeder team and wanted to make it into F1.

If you still watch the sport, you are probably aware that I did make it. It hasn’t always been easy. Something you told me that day, on that flight, has stuck in my mind. You said that there was probably a girl out there who was good enough to make it in motorsport, but just wasn’t told enough that she could. When I was 19, I thought that was me. But since then, I’ve come to realize now that I’ve been very fortunate to have a strong group of people - mostly women, supporting me in my journey, and you, in your own small way, whether you know it or not, are among that number. But the story you told me about your daughter - it made me realize that no matter how hard this journey has been, the trouble is worth it if I can bring some visibility to the women that participate in this sport and make the sport more open and welcoming for female fans.

You mentioned, at the time, that you liked to go to the races in North America on your holidays, and I was hoping you were planning on going to the US Grand Prix this year. I have enclosed two paddock passes and two pasess to the Williams garage and hospitality area. If you happen to be there, I’d be honored to have you as my guest in the garage, and you can feel free to bring someone. I hope this makes it to you in time, and that we get to see each other. It would mean a lot to me.

Thank you again.

Phoebe Stallard

She listed the return address as the factory and hoped the package made it safely to its destination.

There were two races to go until the United States Grand Prix; Russia, and Turkey.

Russia was not kind to Bee. She qualified well, ending up at the top of Q2, even though the track was wet and rapidly drying. George, however, qualified third. Not Q3, actual third place. It was stunning to see, and the paddock was almost buzzing about it - Williams still wouldn’t be in the championship running for a while, but their return to form over the past 2 seasons had been impressive.

Rain started falling on the last 5 laps of the race. As soon as Bee saw the track conditions changing, she cursed out loud on the radio, forgetting it was live - she was in for a points finish, but weather conditions always had the possibility of reshuffling the deck.

Bee pitted for intermediate tyres right away, but spun out on one of the last laps and had enough damage from the resulting collision that she had to retire. She didn’t finish the race, but was still classified because she’d completed more than 90% of it. At least George had gotten himself into the points with a sixth-place finish.

Turkey was an interesting race. Bee hadn’t ever been to Turkey, and actually would have enjoyed spending more time in the country itself. But they were getting to the point in the season calendar where grid penalties were plentiful - each car was only allowed a certain number of component swaps per season, be they for replacing power units (which consisted of the gas engine, electric motors, and an energy recovery system) elements or engines.

Every swapped major component or engine over the allotment for the season meant that your car incurred a grid penalty, no matter what your qualifying result was. Replacing an engine over the allotment would set you back ten places on the grid, no matter what your qualifying place was. Other components could mean having to start from the back of the grid.

Bee knew her car was about to exceed the allotment for engines, so she begged Claire to have the swap done for her car for Turkey instead of risking the penalty for the United States GP. They weren’t in contention for the championship, so it really didn’t matter where or when she got the grid penalty, but she wanted every chance to podium in Austin she could get.

Claire agreed, and Bee took a 10-grid-place penalty in Turkey. She had managed to qualify in 10th, which means she’d made it into Q3. It was a shame to be knocked back down to 20th (or 17th, really, because of other drivers incurring penalties) but it meant that she was able to get to Q3, which was important for Austin.

It was the first race she’d ever remembered running, at least in F1, without a single retirement. George placed 7th, and she placed 10th. She wondered how things might have shaken out if she hadn’t taken a grid penalty, but it had to be done.

Austin, Travis County, Texas, United States of America October 18th, 2021

Bee landed in Austin a few days ahead of when the rest of the team would be arriving, but the bulk of her extended family had flown down from the Midwest - most of them from Michigan, but she had cousins that lived in Illinois and Ohio as well. Her parents would be flying in from Stuttgart as well.

Emilia decided to come early with her - normally, they mostly traveled separately, as Emilia still primarily resided in Germany, but she wanted a little more time to prepare. This was the first of the long flyaway races, so they’d be gone on a longer trip, and she was intrigued by the United States.

“So what is your family like? I’ve met your parents, but this is your entire extended family, right - like, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins?” Emilia said on the flight over.

“They’re… loud. Friendly, but loud. And most of them like to talk. They’ll probably ask you a lot of questions. They’re all basically the opposite of anyone from Germany, so if you want to pretend you don’t speak English to get out of socializing, you’ll need to decide now and commit to that.”

Emilia scoffed. “I’ve met plenty of Americans. You’re American, in case you’d forgotten”

“Ah, you say that,” Bee said, trying hard to hide her smile. “but you met me after I’d been raised in Germany, and you met my parents after they’d lived and worked in Germany for over a decade. It’s not the same.”

“This should be fun”, Bee thought.

“I will give you one piece of advice. If anyone asks ‘How are you?’, it’s more of a greeting and not an actual question. You can just give a non-specific answer, like ‘Good’, or ‘I’m fine.’ That should make things a lot easier.”

Emilia looked confused. “But… Why would they ask if they don’t want to know? Why ask a question you don’t want an answer for?”

Bee laughed. “Like I said, it’s not an actual question. Just treat it as a greeting, and the response is ‘Good, and you?’ If you say any more than that, you might invite a conversation that might become way longer than you want it to be.”

Emilia shook her head. “Okay. I’ll take your word for it.”

Once they landed, they went to their hotel to unpack and get ready to meet Bee’s family. They were all meeting for dinner at a restaurant called Vivo. Bee’s parents had made a reservation so they could all eat outside together on the restaurant’s patio.

It was a strange experience - Bee hadn’t seen a lot of her relatives in-person for years, aside from her grandparents - even that was three years ago now. They peppered her with questions, mostly about Drive to Survive (because they’d started watching it when it debuted, just like everyone else did, and Bee suspected that most of them still didn’t actually watch the races.)

It was a bit funny to Bee - people that were real, her coworkers, more or less, that she spent so much time with - were television characters to them, like they were being played by actors. She did her best to answer their questions, but it felt like being in a rapid-fire press conference.

“That Daniel Ricciardo seems so nice, is he like that for real?”

“Yes. He’s exactly how he is on the show, but he’s also kind of… the class clown, I guess. Always playing pranks.”

“Do those engineer guys really talk to you through the entire race? How can you focus like that?”

“They’re not talking constantly, and they have important information. My engineer’s name is Gaetan. He’s French.”

Emilia, meanwhile, had either ignored or had forgotten Bee’s advice, and had found herself trapped in a conversation with one of Bee’s aunts that she hadn’t necessarily meant to get herself into. Bee turned around at one point and saw the thinly-veiled expression of anguish on Emilia’s face, and decided to jump to her rescue.

“Hi, Aunt Debbie. Nice to see you again. Oh, I’m doing great! Happy to be back in the US for a few days! Yes, I’m excited you’re here for the race, too! I just came to see if Emilia had decided what she wanted to eat. Come on, let’s grab a menu.”

“Thank you,” Emilia said, relieved, as they left Lisa to talk to one of Bee’s other aunts. “She was telling me about her gallbladder removal, in great detail.”

“See? I told you this would happen. She’s an oversharer anyway. But in all seriousness, have you looked at the menu?” Bee said, as they sat at a picnic table by themselves, heads together, poring over the listed fare.

“I don’t know what any of this is,” Emilia said, puzzled over the Spanish names for the dishes. “I’ve never had this food.”

“Okay, well, you like chicken, right? Try the fajita taco plate - that’s always pretty safe, and… ooh, beef enchiladas. That’s what I’m getting. You can try it, if you want.”

So, Emilia had her first encounter with Tex-Mex food. She loved the fajitas, (“These are so good. Why can’t we have these in Germany?” “I could make them for you, if you want, next time you’re in Oxford.” “But your cooking is…” “Okay, fair.” ) but thought Bee’s enchiladas were a bit on the spicy side. (“You eat currywurst, how is this spicy to you?” “It’s a different spicy!”)

They had some drinks (not too many for Bee, at least), which made Bee’s family a little easier to take for Emilia. After the dinner party had dispersed, Bee and Emilia stayed and talked to Bee’s parents for a while, because they were all on European time and weren’t quite ready to head back to the hotel for bed, yet.

While they were sitting and talking, they all had a few more drinks, too. Emilia had quite a few more, and ended up more tipsy than she probably would have liked to have been. She was a clingy, huggy drunk, as it turned out. It was difficult, though - Emilia was eight inches taller than Bee, and practically toppled her over as she was hanging on to Bee for support as they were waiting for their ride back to the hotel.

She didn’t take Emilia back to her room - Bee’s room had two beds, so she poured Emilia into the extra bed and pumped her full of water and ibuprofen, just so she could keep an eye on her.

“You’re my favorite,” Emilia said, in slurred German. She was splayed across the spare bed, and had asked Bee to tuck her in. Bee thought it was silly, but was oddly charmed by it. She sat on the edge of Emilia’s bed, talking to her until she fell asleep.

“I’m so glad I get to travel with you like this, because you’re my favorite client and probably my favorite person. I love spending time with you so much.” Emilia’s eyes were glassy and unfocused, but she was smiling at Bee.

“But I’m your only client right now.” Bee said. It was true. Emilia still worked for a performance coaching company, but like most F1 drivers that used that company’s services, Bee had hired her exclusively, a necessity of her busy schedule.

“I had other clients before you hired me!” She said, “But none of them have been as nice! Or as pretty. You’re very pretty. Did you know that? You have such pretty dark hair. And your blue eyes. I noticed you and your dad have the same eyes. Is that weird that I noticed that?”

“No, it’s true, I do have his eyes.” Bee was trying not to blush. “You should go to sleep, though. We have a long week ahead, but we have some time to do a few fun things tomorrow. And we can get some real barbecue for lunch, just like you wanted.”

“Okay. Goodnight, liebes.” Emilia said, drifting off to sleep.

“Liebes?” Bee thought.

It was a term of endearment in German - the same as calling someone “sweetheart”, “love”, or “honey”, in English. It was startling, and Bee wasn’t quite sure what to make of it, but decided to let it go - Emilia probably had no idea what she was saying.

Circuit of the Americas, Austin, Travis County, Texas, United States of America October 22nd, 2021

It was only Friday, and it had already been a long week for Bee. It had been a fun week, though. She and Emilia had explored a little bit of downtown Austin on Wednesday before Bee had any media or team obligations. Emilia had woken up only a little worse for the wear, but a barbecue lunch had fixed that. (“This is so good, and you get so much food with your order.” Bee had almost expected her to make a “this is why Americans are fat” joke like most Europeans would, but she passed on it.)

Emilia had virtually no memory of returning to the hotel that night, and said she was surprised when she woke up in a room that wasn’t hers.

“So she doesn’t remember flirting with me, or whatever that was, I guess.” Bee thought. She was surprised at how disappointed it made her feel. It wasn’t possible that she was falling in love with her performance coach… was it?

On Wednesday, she’d filmed a few things for Williams’ social media channels, including the reveal for her special Austin GP helmet, and a challenge with George where he had to try to guess how American towns were pronounced. She also was scheduled out for a bunch of interviews and other videos with some American TV broadcasters, like ESPN - they had her and George do a basketball free throw challenge. Bee was never very good at basketball, but she did better than George did.

George had also made a special helmet for the Austin GP, that was cowboy-themed. It didn’t suit him at all, but Bee thought it was endearing. Bee’s helmet was a little more personal and didn’t have much to do with Texas at all, but she’d been planning it out forever and it was gratifying to see the final product. It was strange to see him - a buttoned-up, stereotypical posh Brit wearing a 10-gallon cowboy hat and shooting basketball free throws.

She spotted Susie in the paddock before free practice, and was ecstatic.

“I wasn’t actually sure if you were going to come to this race!” Bee said, giving her a hug.

“Well, surprise! I knew this was a big race for you, and I didn’t want to miss it. I didn’t get to see your first race, but I’ll get to see your first actual home race. I’m going to be in the Williams garage on Sunday, too!”

“Oh, that’s fantastic!” Bee said. “My parents are here as well, they’ll be excited to see you. They’ll be in the paddock tomorrow.”

They chatted a bit longer, but Bee had to go to Free Practice. She really liked seeing Susie at races, but it seemed like they never got long enough to sit and talk before either one of them had to be running off to something.

She headed over to her driver’s room, where Emilia had finished getting everything set up for the weekend and was ready to start Bee on her warmups. She had to change first, but then it was always usually the same routine - a little bit of light, in-place cardio work with resistance bands to get her heart rate up and blood moving, then some neck strength work, some reaction time work with a series of buttons that had lights that flashed in different colors on them.

Then, Emilia always helped her with some assisted stretching, some breathing exercises, and some light massage to keep Bee relaxed and loose, if she needed it. Every driver had their own little ritual and routine, and this was simply what she found had worked for her.

Finally, it was time for Bee’s first practice runs on the circuit. She hadn’t ever driven on it, and it looked like it was going to be a challenge. The track had a whopping 20 turns - most tracks had 10-13 of them, and ran anti-clockwise, which was the opposite direction of most tracks. Not only that, but the first corner off of the start/finish straight went up a steep hill, with a bump that could disrupt your braking, and you had to downshift very quickly into the turn. And that was all just on the first turn, never mind the rest of it.

Plus, it was hot the morning of Free Practice 1, which would mean that Free Practice 2, in the afternoon, would be even hotter. The challenge was going to be tire management - keeping the tires cool and not letting them degrade, which would mean punctures. It was the end of October, but it was still Texas.

Bee looked at the grandstands during her first out-lap - it was packed, already, even for a Free Practice session, which meant that the audience for qualifying and the race would be absolutely massive. The last time she was here, in Austin, they had to throw a Taylor Swift concert to entice people to come - it didn’t look like that would be necessary this year.

Williams Racing YouTube Channel

Phoebe Stallard reveals her helmet design for the United States Grand Prix

91,307 views October 23rd, 2021

Transcript: Hi everyone! I’m Phoebe Stallard from Williams Racing, and I just want to talk about my helmet for the US Grand Prix this weekend. It’s my first US GP! I joined Formula 1 last year, but the 2020 US Grand Prix was canceled because of COVID-19. I’m the only American on the grid, other than honorary American Daniel Ricciardo. This is my home Grand Prix, and obviously, I had a special helmet made! I just wanted to talk through some of the details, because this helmet is really kind of… well, it’s deeply personal to me, and it’s probably my favorite custom design yet.

So, on the top, we have the emblem from the Dodge Super Bee, which was a classic muscle car made in the late 60’s by the Chrysler Corporation, one of the Big 3 car companies based in my home city of Detroit. It’s kind of been a… nickname for me for a long time? I think Danny Ricciardo is the one that started calling me that, and it caught on over the years with fans, and I always liked it, even if Danny started calling me that to tease me because I was so scrawny as a teenager. Plus, it’s kind of a tribute to my dad, who was the one that got me into racing in the first place. He started his career at Chrysler as an automotive engineer. I did make a subtle change to it, though, to make it a little more personal - the bee has a little ponytail coming out of her helmet.

And then on the right here, we have the iconic “Rosie the Riveter” poster from World War 2, with the classic “We Can Do It” text on the top. I always thought it was pretty inspiring, because it shows a woman doing what was traditionally considered men’s work, and racing used to be kind of considered a man’s world. On the bottom of her coveralls, I put the signatures of both Lella Lombardi and Susie Wolff, who are both women in racing that I am inspired by.

Lella Lombardi was the first woman to ever earn a point in the Formula 1 series, and until Monza this year, she was also the only one to have a top six finish in a World Championship race.

Susie Wolff, as most people know, was a test and development driver for Williams, and was the first woman to take part in a Grand Prix weekend in 22 years when she participated in Free Practice 1 the 2014 British Grand Prix. She’s basically been my mentor since I was in Formula Renault. She’s an inspiration for all women wanting to compete in motorsport - I literally do not think I would have made it to Formula 1 without her kind of… advice and guidance. She also founded the Dare to Be Different foundation that works to get more girls interested in motorsport, and I’m really happy to be an ambassador for the organization. I definitely would have been remiss if I didn’t put some sort of tribute to Susie on this helmet.

On the back, we’ve got an image of the Spirit of Detroit statue. I am originally from the Detroit area, and this statue is right downtown on Woodward Avenue. It’s always kind of been an iconic symbol of Detroit, it’s a really important landmark, I’ve always really loved it. And there’s the motto of the City of Detroit on it - “Speramus Meliora” and “Resurget Cineribus”, which means “We Hope For Better Things / It Shall Rise From the Ashes”. Detroit is a tough city, but it’s a city that’s always kind of… been out to prove everyone wrong, you know? A lot of people wanted to write it off entirely a few years ago, when the auto industry went bust and the city itself had to declare bankruptcy, but it’s still there, and there’s so much going on there now, it’s great. I don’t make it home very much, but I’m always really proud to represent it.

On the left side, we have my number, number 50, on a field of red, white, and blue stars, because it’s America, right? Had to show a little patriotism for my first US GP. Plus, it matches the current Williams livery which is handy!

And then, under my visor, we have the letters J & J S, which is for my parents, John and Josephine Stallard, because they’ve always been really supportive of my racing career. My dad was the one that got me into karting, because he thought it was something we could do together - he was always my mechanic, because he’s an automotive engineer. He never really pushed me into it, he just introduced me to racing and I kind of fell in love with it on my own, but both my mom and dad were really supportive of it.

My dad used to work for Chrysler, and we moved to Germany because of his job, but when we had the option to move back to the US, he took a job with Mercedes so we could stay in Germany because I liked karting, and it’s a lot easier to advance in Europe. So, my parents made a lot of sacrifices, living so far away from home, so we could stay in Europe so I could keep racing, so I had to put some sort of tribute to them on here, too.

#f1 fanfic #f1 oc fanfic #formula 1 fanfic #original character #female oc #female f1 driver #toto wolff #george russell #my fanfic #series: wildest dreams #susie wolff

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dracothedeatheatingcupcake-ao3 · 2 years

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Chapter 4 The Ultimate Fake Boyfriend.

You know what? I just realized that I never posted the last chapter I did for The Ultimate (Fake) Boyfriend. This chapter is not complete unfortunately. I think I was trying to finish it but ran into some problems, which I did fix, but made it harder for me to find the energy to keep going with the story. Oof.

Anyway! Here is the unfinished chapter 4 (the last chapter I have written) for my mini fic TUFB. It introduces some more OC characters, so be warned. If anyone wants to know what ideas I had/have for the rest of this story, feel free to send me an ask and I can write them all down! I have this entire story mapped out in my head and know exactly where I want it to go, which is part of the problem. To me, it's already finished. I just have to write it all down for y'all to enjoy it, which is the tedious part. 😬 Oh well. Maybe one day... if I ever finish TPWM.

Last thing! I have another Ishimondo fic that is in similar WIP Hell. Would anyone be interested in seeing it here? It's based on that tweet by... someone from Danganronpa (I forget who at the moment and am too tired to go looking) about how Mondo and Taka would move in after high school and be too stupid to realize they're in love, or something. In this fic, they're in their mid twenties and Mondo is the one who is too stupid to realize he's in love, though it's questionable if Taka realizes it, since the fic is in Mondo's POV. The only chapter fully finished is the first, but I have a lot of small scenes written for later chapters that make some sense alone. I also really like the first chapter, ha. Anyway, let me know if you'd be interested! If even one person comments or messages me about it I'll work towards posting it. ^-^

(Here are the previous chapters if you want to refresh before this one, since it's been a bit.)

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

4 The Ultimate (Fake) Boyfriend.

Mondo spends the next hour lying down quietly while his kyoudai sleeps, his eyes closed but sleep not finding him. He didn’t expect it to, though, so it’s not like he minds. He mostly just wants to be close to Taka, really. It relaxes him more than words can say to just let his kyoudai hold him, not worrying about ‘manliness’ or being weak or whatever other bullshit he usually worries about. Maybe it’s pathetic, but he knows Taka won’t judge him. He… he never fucking does.

However, lying still has never been something Mondo’s been particularly good at, so in order to not die of boredom, he lets his mind wander, flitting between various thoughts and daydreams. He makes sure to steer clear of anything that would anger or upset him, not wanting to ruin the peace being held by Taka has given him.

At some point during his musings, he lets his thoughts turn to Taka, a smile rising on his lips as he thinks of his kyoudai. Of all the things they’ve done together and the many good times they’ve had. Like the first time he convinced the dude to go out on his hog, Taka screaming his head off the entire time, arms so tight around Mondo’s waist that he’s positive he had almost bust a rib. But then, once they stopped, Taka had had the brightest grin, claiming that the ride made him feel /exhilarated/. Or the time he took Taka to meet Daiya for the first time, Mondo so fucking nervous that they wouldn’t like one another, only to feel so fucking relieved when the two got on like a house on fire. Taka had even been very respectful about Dai’s injuries that he’s been struggling with since the crash, somehow managing to be both considerate and helpful while not being condescending. Or their ‘epic’ snowball fight that first winter, which slowly turned into an all out war between them, with multiple classmates slowly getting roped into the expanding battle. Or… well. The list goes on and on, really. It makes his smile widen to think of how much he and Taka have done together. How much the teen has helped him over the past years.

And he has. Helped him. So goddamn much. In so many different ways. Case in point, Mondo never would have had the guts to sign up for that woodworking elective class that Hope’s Peak offers if not for Taka’s enthusiastic encouragement, the hall monitor telling him all the goddamn time how he believed that Mondo could do it. That Mondo wouldn’t fail at it like he feared he would, that he wouldn’t prove himself right about how there is absolutely no future available to him. Taka had slowly but surely convinced him to try it even despite his fears, and now woodworking is his favorite fucking class, the only one he honestly feels /excited/ to attend.

He still doesn’t think he’s that great at it, but he’s built so many fucking things for his room now, like a slightly crooked chair, and a surprisingly stable shelf. Not to mention all of things he’s whittled, since he finds that whittling actually helps calm him down after one of his rages. His first projects looked like utter shit, looking nothing like he wanted, but his more recent ones have started looking almost decent. And he just… he never would have gained the courage to take the class if not for his kyoudai. Nor would he have had the confidence to keep going after all of his numerous fuck ups during the first few weeks.

The point is… honestly, he doesn’t know the point. Just… Taka is important. So fucking important. And as he lies on Taka’s broad, surprisingly comfortable chest, letting his mind wander down the memories he treasures the most, feeling so warm and full inside even despite the earlier negative emotions and uncertainty… he remembers why he’s doing this. And why he has to ensure he doesn’t screw this up. Outside of Daiya, Taka is easily the most important person in his life. He’s even surpassed the gang, he’s that fucking important. He’d walk through hell and back for his kyoudai, he truly would. And part of him thinks that Taka would do the same for him, even if he’d never want the teen to go through anything like that for his sake. It’s give and take, really. That’s why they work so well.

Mondo continues to daydream for most of the afternoon, not sure what time it is since his phone is in his pocket and there are no windows in this tiny ass, dark as shit closet, but it doesn’t matter. Taka has a frighteningly accurate internal clock that somehow always wakes him up exactly when he needs to be up for any given event, with time to spare to get ready. Mondo relies on that internal clock a lot, honestly.

However… it’s after what Mondo assumes must be around an hour that something changes in their little space. And it has nothing to do with Taka.

At first, Mondo isn’t entirely sure what it is. His eyes are closed and nothing has really changed from what he can tell, but just… shit. He can’t fucking explain it, but there’s just something /different/ about the room now. He furrows his brow as he thinks about this, examining his surroundings as best he can. Listening close, he can still hear the faint sound of people talking and passing through rooms, the same shit he’s been hearing this entire time since the walls are thin as shit in this place. So, it’s not that that’s different. It’s nothing he can smell either. Thinking on it, it’s more… a feeling. Like… like he’s being /watched/ or something. But that’s fucking ridiculous. It’s just him and Taka in this small, dark closet…

Right?

A minute passes, the sense he’s being watched growing with each passing second, until Mondo can’t take it anymore. With a heavy sigh, he opens his eyes and lifts his head from Taka’s chest, even though he’d been trying not to do that and break the peace inside him. Feeling annoyed at himself, he turns towards the door and lets his eyes land on the doorway.

And promptly finds a pair of eyes staring back at him.

“The fuck…?” Mondo mutters, blinking in shock, immediately on alert. He half sits up, forgetting everything as he looks at the unexpected intruder. As he does so, he realizes that one of the things he’d subconsciously noticed earlier was that it’s now a bit brighter inside the room. With the door closed, the closet had been mostly dark, with only a little light leaking in through the thin sliding door. Now, though, the door is open, causing the figure to be silhouetted by the faint light from the hallway. As such, all he can see are their wide eyes and their silhouetted head, which seem to be tilted in question. What in the goddamn fuck…

“That’s a bad word,” the intruder claims, their voice far higher and younger sounding than he’d been expecting. Blinking, Mondo squints and forces his eyes to adjust to the light, and is absolutely floored to see a young child standing in the doorway of the closet, still mostly shrouded in shadow, though he can make out some details. Like how their eyes seem to be bright red. Which is, uh… shit. Not good. “Mommy says that you shouldn’t say bad words. It’s not nice.”

Mondo can only blink at the words, his mind blanking as he’s faced with what must be another of Taka’s cousins, though this one is a lot smaller than he’s used to dealing with. Mondo honestly can’t recall the last time he’s been around a goddamn /kid/. Shit, he doesn’t think he’s done that since he was a kid himself. Fuck… and of course he would fucking /swear/ in front of one of the literal worst persons to swear in front of, god fucking dammit…

“Uh… y-yeah. Yer, uh… yer ma’s right. Ain’t good ta swear. Sorry,” Mondo mumbles, too taken aback to remember to use his more ‘respectable’ voice. He’s just so fucking floored. And kind of tired. While he hadn’t been sleeping, it had been very peaceful to lie on Taka and just daydream. Having to face a kid, let alone one of Taka’s endless fucking cousins immediately after that is… yeah. Not fun. Especially since Taka is, of course, merrily sleeping on, none the wiser that one of his cousins is standing there, watching him sleep…

Thankfully, the kid doesn’t seem put off by his accent. From what he can see, the kid just gives him a toothy grin, head still titled.

“That’s okay! Just don’t do it again, or else mommy will wash your mouth out with soap like she did with my ani when he said a bad word. Why are you lying on cousin Taka?” the kid asks quickly, not giving him much time to process whatever they’re saying. And he’s not sure, since they’re still mostly in shadow, but based on how high pitched the voice is, Mondo thinks the kid may be a girl… or a very high pitched boy. Which is also possible, especially with young kids. Shit.

“Uh… w-well, we’re uh… ya know. Together,” Mondo states awkwardly, shifting so he’s fully seated, though he makes sure to leave Taka the blanket. Sitting up puts him about eye level with the kid, which honestly makes him feel a little better, since he can at least see them better now. They look young, but not super young, so he guesses they’re not Samantha then…

“What does that mean?” the kid asks before he can try and figure out which kid this is, flooring him again. Uh… shit. How to fucking explain this in a way a kid will understand…

“Uh… it means we’re datin’,” Mondo says slowly. When the kid doesn’t show any signs that they understand, Mondo awkwardly tries to explain a different way. “Uh… like… ya know. We go out on dates together an’ stuff. An’… we uh… ya know. Love each other? Uh…”

Despite himself, Mondo feels his cheeks heat up at that last part. While it’s not unusual for a couple who is dating to be in love, it makes him feel weird to say that kind of shit about him and Taka, even if just an act. And it’s not like he doesn’t love Taka, right? He does. Very much so. Just… as a friend. A brother. Not like /that/. Not… ya know. Romantically.

At least that seems to make sense to the kid, as their eyes light up, nodding their head quickly as they smile at him.

“Oh! Like mommy and daddy, right?”

Mondo blinks once, before nodding slowly, giving a single shrug.

“Uh… yeah, kinda. I’m his boyfriend,” Mondo explains further, wondering if the kid will question that too. However, it seems that they understand that one, since they nod again, still smiling.

“Cool! What’s your name?” the kid asks, eyes wide as they lean into the closet, closer to him.

Mondo pauses, debating if he should answer or not, remembering what happened the last time he gave his name. Well… it would be rude not to… and it’s unlikely that a kid would know who the fuck he is, so… whatever. Fuck it.

“Uh… I’m Mondo. Mondo Owada.”

Like he’d expected, the kid shows no sign that they recognize his name. They just nod quickly, smile still bright.

“Cool!! I’m Rini, wanna go see my dollies? I have soooo many at home, but mommy told me I could only bring three with me. I brought Ren and Ruki, who are sisters who hate each other and are fighting for the love of Haru. He’s the third dolly I brought. You can be Haru if you wanna, since you’re a boy!”

Mondo stares at the kid— who he now realizes is, indeed, a girl, and is also sadly the youngest daughter of Taka’s fucking homophobic aunt— without a single clue as to what to say. Obviously, he doesn’t want to do that shit; he’s almost a grown ass man, he doesn’t fucking /play with dolls/. But how to say that without hurting the kid’s feelings…? Like he said, he doesn’t spend time with kids much, but he knows better than to be an asshole to a fucking /kid/. That shit’s about as bad as punching an old lady. Maybe even worse, really.

Fortunately (or not…), before Mondo has to figure out how to gently say no to the kid, an unholy screech sounds through the house. It’s so loud it finally rouses Taka, who bolts upright with wide, bleary eyes, clearly not fully awake. Mondo doesn’t have time to get the teen reacquainted to the land of the living, because then… then he can begin making out the words that are being said. Which are… shit. Not very good.

“-INI! RINI, WHERE ON EARTH ARE YOU?! IF YOU DON’T COME HERE RIGHT NOW, THERE WILL BE CONSEQUENCES!! RINI!”

Mondo looks down at the kid in the doorway, who is now cowering down against the frame, looking so much smaller than even a six year old girl should look. It honestly breaks Mondo’s heart, and he has to fight to not rush over to the kid and make sure she never, ever gets hurt. Fuck… he hates it when people yell at kids… shit’s the fucking worst…

“Uh oh…” Rini mumbles, meeting his look with wide eyes. She then looks to the side in just enough time for a hand to appear on her shoulder, the girl letting out a high pitched yelp at the touch.

“There you are! My goodness child, how many times do I have to tell you not to wander off?! You were supposed to be helping your brothers unpack your things in your room, not wandering about! I swear, I don’t know /what/ to do with you some days,” a sharp, exasperated voice calls, causing Rini to shrink down, her eyes falling to the floor in what Mondo can tell is shame. It honestly pisses him the /fuck/ off, but he reins it in, knowing that exploding ain’t gonna help anyone. He really has to call on every anger management bullshit that Taka’s been feeding him this last year in order to stop his anger from consuming him, though…

“I- I’m sorry mommy… I was just looking around… but I found cousin Taka! And cousin Taka’s boyfriend, Mondo-san! He’s sooo cool!! And he’s really nice, and fun to talk to, and he loves cousin Taka, and he’s gonna play dollies with me, and-“

“You /what/?!” the lady exclaims, cutting the girl off. Rudely, in Mondo’s opinion. He can feel his anger spike when he sees Rini shrink down even further, trying to shy away from her ma’s touch, though the lady is holding the girl too tightly for that. And considering that Mondo is nearly positive he knows /exactly/ who this fucking lady is, it’s getting really hard to reel that anger in… “Rini, what did I tell you before coming here?! What on earth is the matter with you?! Can’t you listen?!”

Rini’s eyes start to water then, and Mondo can see her lip wobbling. She looks up at them sadly, before looking up at her ma, her expression turning guilty. Mondo can feel Taka shift beside him, reminding him that the teen is there, but he doesn’t take his eyes off the scene before him, his breathing getting a bit too heavy. S-shit…

“I… I know… b-but I love cousin Taka… he’s always nice to me and plays games with me, even if his games don’t make much sense… a-and Mondo-san was gonna play dollies with me, and I was gonna let him be Haru, since he’s a boy… I- I know you said I shouldn’t talk to them, that there’s something wrong with them, but I don’t understand why. Cousin Taka is nice, and Mondo-san is nice too… why can’t I talk to them anymore?”

While it’s still kinda dark, Mondo can see that the lady’s face is turning red, her eyes pinched as she looks down at her daughter. It makes Mondo’s hands clench, his anger rising rapidly.

“We already talked about this, Rini. If you cannot understand basic orders, then there truly is no hope for you. Now, come along. You still need to unpack your things and get settled. If I see you talking to either your cousin or his… /whatever/ again, then believe me, there will be consequences. Come, Rini.”

The lady strides away then, leaving Rini behind, though it’s clear she expects the girl to follow. Mondo’s heart clenches as he watches the poor kid look wide eyed between them and her ma, clearly not knowing what to do. Taka shifts next to him again, and Mondo can tell he’s also upset with what’s going on. Deeply so.

“A-ah… i-it’s okay, Rini. Y-you can go after your mother. It… it’s alright,” Taka says softly after a moment. Mondo finally glances over at the teen at the words and feels his heart break even more when he sees a sad, yet also resigned look on Taka’s face. It also makes him even angrier, Jesus Christ… honestly, /fuck/ Taka’s aunt. Lady can go burn in hell for all he cares… shit…

“B-but… I… o-okay… I don’t know why mommy doesn’t want me to talk to you… I’m sorry…” Rini mumbles, looking at the ground, shifting awkwardly. A beat passes, and then they can hear Taka’s aunt call for Rini again, voice sharp and angry. Rini winces, gives them one last, unhappy look, before darting off after her ma, leaving them behind without a word more. As she runs off, Mondo develops a bad taste in his mouth, his stomach churning angrily. So. Not only is Taka’s aunt a no-good, motherfucking /homophobe/, but she’s also a piece of shit ma, too. Figures. It does tend to work that way.

The silence between him and Taka is stifling in the aftermath of that shitshow, neither of them really knowing what to say. What can they fucking say in response to that goddamn shit? Fuck… /fuck/, Mondo hates this. So fucking much.

Just when the silence is about to consume them, the tension unbearable, Mondo feels Taka shift to face him, his eyebrows furrowed with a bitter frown on his face.

“What… w-what happened, kyoudai? I think I missed some of that… I’m sorry…” Taka says softly again, sounding so fucking /sad/ it physically hurts. Mondo shakes his head sharply in reply, turning on the mat to face Taka, eyes intent.

“Nah, don’t fuckin’ apologize man. Ain’t yer goddamn fault. Just… I was kinda dozin’, not really asleep, when I felt like someone was starin’ at me. When I looked up, yer cousin was there. We talked fer a bit, it was awkward, an’ then… /then/ yer fuckin’ aunt started screamin’ her goddamn head off. That’s when ya woke up, so ya know the rest. An’ can I just fuckin’ say that I fuckin’ /hate/ yer goddamn aunt? Fuckin’ homophobic, abusive piece a’ goddamn /shit/,” Mondo curses, so angry it’s not funny. He swears, if he didn’t have a rule against hitting ladies (though he’s fairly certain this fucker doesn’t qualify), and if she weren’t unfortunately Taka’s family… well. Let’s just say he’d be feeling a whole lot better right about now…

“A-ah… I- I see. Well, I’m sorry you had to experience that, kyoudai. I… I knew that Aunt Ryoko didn’t, um… /approve/ of my sexuality, but I had hoped that it wouldn’t affect anything at the gathering. I… see now that I was wrong… I- I… I’m sorry…”

Mondo scowls at the faltering words, shaking his head sharply and shifting to be closer to Taka. He can see that Taka’s eyes are wide and watery, which he knows from experience means he’s about five seconds away from bursting into tears, which is utter /bullshit/. Needing to get Taka to listen to him and pay the fuck attention, he lifts his hand and cups the teen’s cheek firmly, ensuring he has his attention. Once he sees Taka staring at him with wide eyes, his mouth open slightly in surprise, Mondo begins.

“Listen here an’ listen good, okay? That shit /ain’t/ yer fuckin’ fault. Not a single, fuckin’ thing. Yer aunt is a fuckin’ piece a’ shit who’s got shit fer brains, an’ it ain’t got nothin’ ta do with you. Ya hear me? So, don’t fuckin’ ‘pologize fer her bullshit. Ya’ve done nothin’ ta deserve it. Absolutely fuckin’ /nothin’/.”

Mondo keeps his eyes steady on his kyoudai, and as such he can see the second the first tear begins to fall. But Mondo can tell by the small smile on Taka’s lips that they’re not tears of unhappiness, but just… emotion. His kyoudai has always been super emotional… Mondo used to look down upon Taka for it, back before they were kyoudai, but now he almost envies the dude. He doesn’t even remember the last time he cried. Not without hating himself for it. Taka, though, has always been able to cry so easily, and it’s… good. It’s definitely helped show Mondo that dudes can cry and show emotion, and yet still be strong. There’s no one stronger than his kyoudai, after all.

“I… I know that, k-kyoudai… I just… I don’t know. I greatly dislike this whole situation. I knew that coming out would make things more challenging, just like I knew that bringing my supposed boyfriend with me would create tension. And yet… despite knowing this and preparing for it, I still feel so lost. I simply don’t know what to do here, kyoudai, and you know how much I hate not knowing things. I… I’m also very tired… this was not exactly the best way to awaken,” Taka states solemnly, sounding so fucking serious it actually makes Mondo snort even despite the severity of the situation. He can see Taka pout, but he doesn’t think the dude is hurt, thankfully. With a shrug and a sigh, Mondo sobers up and does his best to respond.

“Shit, yeah. I know man. Ya think I know what the fuck is goin’ on? I just spoke ta a fuckin’ /infant/ who wants me ta play fuckin’ /dollies/ with her. An’ now, since yer fuckin’ aunt don’t want me ta do that shit, of course I gotta do it just ta fuckin’ spite her. Shit fuckin’ /sucks/. But don’t ya think fer a fuckin’ second it’s yer fault, got me? An’ y’ain’t gotta take it when people say that kinda shit ta ya. Ya deserve more than that shit. Yer the best fuckin’ person I ever fuckin’ met, an’ that’s fuckin’ that. I ain’t gonna hear ya say otherwise.”

More tears begin to fall down Taka’s face, and Mondo finally gives in and wraps his arms around the teen, pulling him close. Taka goes easily, sniffling as he buries his face against Mondo’s chest, snuggling to get closer. It makes Mondo smile, his heart giving a little lurch at the sight. But fuck, if his kyoudai ain’t cute as shit…

The pair remain like that for a while, just holding onto one another in their dark room. The door is still open a little, but no one passes so Mondo doesn’t pay it any mind. It’s so much nicer to just hold his kyoudai and forget everything than to worry about all that other shit. He’ll have to eventually but… not right now. Right now, he’s holding Taka as the dude slowly calms himself down. And that’s all that fucking matters.

Eventually Taka does pull away, wiping his eyes with a shaky smile. Mondo lets him go reluctantly, unhappy with it but knowing he’s gotta.

“T-thank you, kyoudai… you are right, like usual! This situation is not my fault, I am simply being myself and that’s what should matter! I… thank you, Mondo. You truly are too good to me,” Taka smiles softly at him, his eyes soft as butter. It makes Mondo want to pull him close again, to feel his warmth against him, but he knows he can’t, so he doesn’t. He just lets Taka look down at his watch, the dude’s eyes widening at whatever he sees there.

“Ah! It’s getting late! Great Aunt Hana and Grandmother Kichi expect people to be at dinner at 6:00 promptly, and it’s almost 5:55! I- I am sorry, my dearest kyoudai, but I must put my uniform back on immediately! I-“

“Go, ya dork. I’ll change back inta

my fuckin’ get up too, shit,” Mondo interrupts, rolling his eyes and standing up. He knows better than to argue with Taka about this kinda shit by this point. The dude is so fucking anal that Mondo is positive he will spontaneously combust if he doesn’t immediately start getting ready for this dinner. Wasting time by arguing will just upset him more and Mondo… shit. He definitely doesn’t want that.

Taka gives him a grateful look as he stands to get his gear, turning the single lightbulb the closet has on so they can see better, though it’s still fucking dark as shit. Mondo turns to the uncomfortable polo shirt and black slacks he and Taka bought at a night market a few days prior, wrinkling his nose at the uncomfortable outfit.

“I fuckin’ hate this goddamn shit,” Mondo mumbles as he shimmies into the slacks, which are a thin, highly uncomfortable material. He supposes he can’t be shocked since he got them for ¥400, but still. “I don’t know how the fuck ya dress in that goddamn outfit a’ yers every goddamn day. Seems uncomfortable as shit.”

“It’s actually not that bad, kyoudai! I find it very comfortable! And convenient!” Taka responds, looking over at him as he zips up his fly. Mondo snorts, knowing the dude means it fully even though it’s complete bullshit, but Taka ignores that. “Thank you for agreeing to wear that outfit, though! I think you look very sharp in it!”

Mondo feels his cheeks heat up at the compliment, and feels a bit too flustered to respond. Instead, he just shrugs sharply and turns back to his clothes, getting dressed as quick as he can. Taka does the same and they spend a minute in silence as they dress.

Mondo is just finishing up combing his hair out and putting it in his half pony when he hears Taka let out a noise of dismay. Turning to face the hall monitor, he sees Taka with his hands up near his hair, a distressed look on his face.

“Everythin’ good, kyoudai?”

Taka turns to face him, pout on his lips.

“Ah, kind of! Or… not really! I mean… well! It’s just that my hair is out of order, but we don’t have any time for me to head to the bathroom to fix it! And it is highly unprofessional to walk around with mused hair! It is not that big of a problem, I suppose… just highly annoying!” Taka exclaims, nodding his head for emphasis. Mondo can’t help but smirk at the comment, snorting softly. Honestly, he’d noticed that Taka’s hair was a bit all over the place and not all contained and spiky like the teen prefers, but Mondo hadn’t mentioned it because it honestly suits him.

He knows how much Taka hates that shit, though, and so he doesn’t hesitate a second before gesturing for the hall monitor to move closer to him. Taka does so without hesitation, though Mondo can see the confused look Taka gives him. The look vanishes once Mondo lifts the hand that’s still holding his comb, running it gently through Taka’s hair.

“A-ah-! M-Mondo, you… you needn’t do that, kyoudai… I can handle it myself! … besides, it’s unsanitary to share a comb,” Taka mumbles, his entire face bright red as Mondo determinedly combs the knots and kinks out of his best friend’s hair. With a snort, Mondo tugs gently on a silky strand, ignoring the flare of heat that blooms in his belly at the feel.

“Shut the fuck up, Kiyo. Ain’t like I got fuckin’ fleas or shit. An’ I don’t fuckin’ mind combin’ yer hair, man. Don’t make a big fuckin’ deal outta it,” Mondo mumbles back, his own cheeks stupidly pink. He can tell that the hall monitor isn’t exactly happy at the situation, his lips pulled down in a little pout, but he doesn’t offer any more complaints.

However, after a few moments of careful combing, Mondo can feel Taka’s shoulders relax, the teen letting out a soft, happy sounding sigh as his eyes close with contentment. The heat in Mondo’s cheeks increases, but he doesn’t stop his combing, not even for a second. And if he keeps combing for a few moments longer than he has to, the feel of the silky strands too nice to stop that shit, well… whatever. Doesn’t fucking matter, shit.

He is eventually able to force himself to stop combing, reluctantly. He knows they gotta get going soon or else they’ll be late, which he knows would upset Taka. And he doesn’t want that. Definitely not.

“There ya go, man. Nice an’ fuckin’ ‘proper’ again. Ain’t all spiky, since I don’t got any gel at the ‘mo, but it’ll fuckin’ do. Now, c’mon. Let’s get this fuckin’ dinner bullshit over with.”

Taka gives him a single wide eyed, slightly dazed look, cheeks a soft pink and mouth hanging partially open, before snapping out of it and nodding quickly. Mondo shoves aside the lurch in his stomach and follows after Taka as the teen opens the sliding door to exit their small ass room.

As they move at a brisk pace through the house, Taka doing his usual ‘not running, just walking super fucking fast’ bullshit, Mondo can feel a spike of unease fill him at the thought of sharing a dinner with at least the majority of Taka’s family. He doesn’t know if everyone’s arrived or not, but shit. Either way, it’s still gonna be way more than Mondo is comfortable with. The shit he does for this fussy ass hall monitor…

Once they reach the bottom of the staircase, Mondo follows after Taka down a few hallways, until they reach an open doorway that a lot of noise is flooding out of. Mondo figures that must be the dining room, the spike of unease increasing the closer they get. He can see an unhappy look on Taka’s face as well, his lips pulled down and his intense eyebrows furrowed. But Taka barely falters as he approaches the room. Rather, after a brief moment of hesitation, he just sets his shoulders and pastes a painfully false smile on his lips, looking for all the world like a man about to go into battle. Mondo would find it funny if he wasn’t feeling vaguely sick. And if he wasn’t concerned about his kyoudai.

Taka spares him a single, commiserating glance, before the teen is slipping into the room, his voice loud as always as he apologizes for his tardiness. It makes Mondo smile slightly to hear Taka acting like himself, settling his insides a little. Well… better get this shit over with…

Entering the room after his kyoudai, Mondo tries to look more confident than he feels, eyes casually glancing across the room to get a lay of the land. He has to fight against the lurch in his stomach when he sees a hell of a lot more people than there had been earlier milling around the room, half of them kneeling at the low table and half of them helping bring the food from the kitchen to the dining room. Shit…

“No need for apologies, nephew. It has been a long day, I am sure,” Hana calls from her place at the table, smiling wryly at the teen. Her eyes dart over to him quickly, before nodding her head towards the table. “Now, why don’t you help your mother grab the rice while your partner takes a seat? You will be sitting beside your parents like usual, with Mondo-san sitting between you and Yoshi. You may show Mondo-san his seat before going to help your mother.”

With that, Hana turns back to the table, instructing the various family members as to where to put the shit ton of food that was made. Literally, it’s like they’re expecting to feed an army, the fuck? It briefly distracts Mondo from his nerves, but the distraction does not last long. Not when Taka turns to face him a moment later, a small grimace upon his face.

“Ah, of course, Great Aunt Hana! I will do that right away!” Taka exclaims, gesturing for Mondo to follow him. Which Mondo does immediately, knowing that trying to resist would be fucking pointless. Shit.

He follows after Taka towards an empty area of the table, his kyoudai pointing casually to a cushion that is placed around the edge of the long table. There are a few unoccupied cushions around him, though there is a man that Mondo has never seen before a cushion over from his. From what Mondo can see when he glances over at the man, he appears to be white, with sandy brown hair and bright blue eyes. He’s also holding a wriggling infant, with a small toddler sleeping soundly on his lap, making Mondo fairly confident that he’s found Taka’s cousin-in-law, Alex. What joy…

“So, Mondo! You may sit here while I go and help my mother bring out the dishes, like Great Aunt Hana said! I will be right back, I promise!” Taka exclaims, barely giving him a second to process the words before he’s darting away with a small half smile, half grimace. Leaving him alone with the foreigner and two infants. Great…

Unable to see what else he could do, Mondo takes a seat like he was informed, fighting to not squirm uncomfortably. God fucking dammit… he hates this shit… he honestly would prefer to be up and helping out, hating to be inactive when shit is going on, but he knows that would be considered ‘rude,’ or something, so he just sits down on his little cushion, feeling like an utter jackass. Fuck.

Wanting to dispel the awkwardness he feels, Mondo looks around the room, trying to place the new faces he sees at the table, thinking it will help to know who is who before dinner officially begins.

Other than Alex and the two babies, Mondo notices three kids sitting across from his cushion, down the table a bit. One of them is clearly Rini, though the poor girl is staring resolutely at the table with her hands in her lap, quiet and sad looking. It angers the shit outta Mondo, but he quickly pushes it down, knowing anger won’t help him here.

He turns his gaze to the two kids beside her, assuming they’re her older brothers. They both look very similar, with dark black hair kept in a short, messy style, like they just woke up or something. They also have red eyes, from what he can see from his distance, and one has a shit eating grin on his face as he talks animatedly, while the other listens quietly, a thoughtful frown on his face. If it weren’t for the fact that the quiet kid is a lot smaller than the loud one, Mondo would think the quiet one is the older brother. But, judging by size and by what Taka has told him, he assumes the quiet one is Raidon, the little brother, making the loud mouth Ronin. Huh. Whatever.

Moving on, Mondo notices Hana, Kichi, and Akiro sitting around the head of the table, across the table from where Mondo is sitting. The two ladies are dictating where everything goes to the numerous family members who are bringing the food in, while Akiro watches silently. Since Mondo already knows those three, he quickly moves his gaze on, looking at the last seated occupant of the room.

Sitting on the other side of the three elders, across from Rini, Ronin, and Raidon, sits a lone teenage girl, who looks bored as she scrolls on her little smart phone. She has dark auburn colored hair and mahogany eyes, which are glued to the screen, ignoring everything else around her. Considering that only younger kids and elderly seem to be seated at the table (excluding him and Alex, though he guesses he’s seated since he’s a ‘guest’ and Alex is seated to mind his kids), he guesses this kid must be Taka’s second cousin from his other ‘aunt,’ Haruki. Which, Mondo realizes with a sinking heart, must mean that Taka’s stuck up family members must have also arrived while they were sleeping upstairs. Fucking fantastic… but wait, hold up a second…

With a frown on his lips, Mondo goes over that fact in his head a little more in detail, the sinking feeling expanding. As he tallies up the numbers, he realizes that if Taka’s Aunt Kumi, Uncle Daichi, and their brood is here, then that means everyone who is coming to the gathering is currently in the house, other than maybe one or two people. Which, Mondo realizes with a queasy stomach, is far sooner than he had anticipated. Taka had told him that it often takes longer for everyone to trickle in, some not arriving until the second day. Of fucking course everyone would be on time this year. God fucking dammit…

Suddenly feeling put off of his curiosity, Mondo shifts his eyes to the table, glaring at the wood. His hands are clenched in fists at his sides and his stomach is in knots. He hadn’t expected to meet pretty much everyone today. He had hoped he’d have a little more time to fucking prepare. Of course not, he thinks bitterly. Of fucking course not…

“It’s a bit much, yes?” Mondo suddenly hears come from his right, the words a bit clumsy and the accent not that great, to be honest, which tells him exactly who is speaking right now. He darts his eyes over to where he heard the voice, his back stiffening as he wonders if the dude is actually talking to him or not. He stiffens further when he notices that, yeah, the dude /is/ talking to him. The person he assumes is Alex is definitely staring right at him, a shaky smile on his lips as he holds his fussing babe. Shit… god fucking dammit. He was hoping he could avoid conversation until Taka got back… Taka always helps him keep his cool in awkward situations… fuck.

“Uh… yeah, I uh… I guess,” Mondo mumbles, feeling unbearably awkward, not sure what to say to the American. Alex doesn’t seem to think he’s fucking up too badly, he guesses, since the man just nods, his smile turning a bit wry as he looks around the chaotic room.

“Yes, I remember my first time here. Very… noisy. My Japanese was bad then, and it was hard to keep up. It’s gotten better, but can still be a lot at times. They’re a good bunch once they get used to you,” Alex claims, his accent still clumsy and his words simple, but he’s mostly understandable. Mondo wonders if he should switch to speaking in English to help the dude out, since he’s almost fluent in the language, but decides against it. Ain’t like it fucking matters. He doesn’t even want to be having this conversation in the first place, so… shit. Whatever.

“Yeah, I guess,” he mumbles again after a couple awkward moments pass, not sure what else he’s supposed to say. He’s never been good with conversation when he doesn’t really know the person he’s talking to. Shit’s awkward as fuck and he hates feeling awkward.

However, once again Alex doesn’t seem deterred, the man simply nodding in agreement, looking back at him with another crooked smile.

“My name is Alex, by the way. I’m Yoshi’s husband. She mentioned you earlier. You are Mondo Owada, correct? You go to Taka’s school?”

Mondo’s fists clench further at the reminder of the earlier disastrous meeting, wondering what the fuck Yoshi has been saying about him. He takes a deep breath to push down the rush of anger and just nods his head jerkingly, saying nothing as he glares at the table. An awkward silence rises between them then, but Mondo doesn’t fucking care. He’s not here to entertain douchebag Americans, thanks.

The silence stretches on as the baby fusses, Mondo not really interested in continuing the conversation. He feels a bit shitty about that, knowing that Taka expects him to make an effort with his family, but… shit. He’s been feeling so fucking off since ‘waking up’ that he thinks keeping his mouth fucking shut is prolly the best idea. Get through this dinner as painlessly as possible when surrounded by overbearing go getters, get some much needed rest, and hope tomorrow won’t be an absolute disaster. That’s the best he can fucking hope for, honestly. Fuck.

And yet, of course he can’t get even that, he thinks sardonically as Alex clears his fucking throat, clearly intending to continue on with the goddamn one sided conversation. God fucking dammit… how the fuck long does it take to bring the fucking food out, god fucking dammit…

“So. You’re the… uh, what’s the word… Ultimate Motorcycle Rider, correct?” Alex asks, head tilted, rocking his kid a little. The stupid ass question makes Mondo snort, his eyebrow raised as he finally looks over at the dude, unimpressed. Shit. He didn’t even bother making sure he had the right info before bringing it up? Fucking dumbass.

“Ultimate Biker Gang Leader,” Mondo corrects in a drawl, restraining an eye roll, not wanting to be seen as overtly rude. He wonders if Alex is gonna have a problem with his talent, though. He’s such a straight laced looking dude, Mondo thinks as he takes in his white button up, black slacks, and simple hair cut. From what he recalls, Taka says he’s a fucking accountant, AKA the most boring profession of all time. He prolly ain’t a fan of the rough and tumble kind of life Mondo leads. Or… led. Whatever.

Alex, however, doesn’t seem to have a problem with it, not if his benign smile and thoughtful nod is anything to go by. Jesus. He’s like the human equivalent of a stale cracker. Absolutely nothing of real value.

“Ah, of course! My mistake. That’s… interesting. I’ve never ridden a motorcycle before. They seem, ah… dangerous.”

Mondo snorts again at the words he’s heard a thousand fucking times, unable to stop the eye roll this time. He leans back on his cushion, turns slightly to face the dude, and gives him his most unimpressed look. Dumbass.

“Yeah, no duh,” Mondo snarks, forgetting that he’s supposed to be talking ‘respectable’. “Hogs are fricken dangerous rides. S’why I like ‘em. Ain’t nothin’ like ridin’ down the highway, nothin’ but wind in yer hair an’ asphalt under yer wheels. Feel every turn an’ curve ya take, practic’lly part a’ yer ride. Best fricken feelin’.”

Alex gives him a confused look, his head tilted and his eyebrows furrowed, and at first Mondo thinks the dude is judging him for his enthusiasm for riding. The thought makes him angry, his hands clenching into tighter fists, hating it when people fucking /judge him/ for liking to ride. Shit, it ain’t a fucking crime is it?! Well… sometimes it is, he likes to drive super fucking fast and without a fucking helmet, but… still! Fuck!

Luckily, before he can snap anything out, Alex speaks, his words slow and hesitant, a hint of embarrassment lining them.

“Er, I’m sorry, Mondo-san… I didn’t quite catch half of your statement. While I’ve been living here for five years, my Japanese still isn’t the best… I believe you mentioned something about enjoying riding? It does sound like fun!”

Mondo blinks and realizes suddenly that he’d switched to his more laid back style of speaking, which he knows for a fact is faster and lazier than his more ‘formal’ speech. Shit, Mondo forget he was supposed to be doing that shit. What happens when you get him started talking about riding… shit.

Mondo doesn’t get a chance to say anything else (not an apology, because fuck that), since at that moment Taka approaches, smiling brightly as he takes a seat to Mondo’s left.

“Hello Mondo! Mother sent me out here since she only has one last dish to bring out before we should be able to begin eating!” Taka exclaims brightly, smiling an only somewhat strained smile. Taka then turns to Alex, his eyes immediately seeking out the baby, looking strangely intense. He begins speaking in English a moment later, words steady enough. “/Hello Alex! It is nice to see you again! Is this Benjamin/?”

Alex relaxes now that Taka is here, his smile much easier as he nods his head, shifting to visibly present the baby to Taka.

“/Hey man! It’s great to see you too! And yeah, this is little Benny. We’ve told him a lot about you, you know, though who knows how much he took in, ha. He’s usually a pretty happy baby, but he’s a bit fussy today. Yosh thinks he’s coming down with something/,” Alex claims in English, though he doesn’t sound super concerned. Mondo looks down at the red faced infant, who is staring up at them with bright red, tiny eyes, glassy with unshed tears. It’s strange to see such eyes on a baby, and Mondo can’t quite tear his eyes away, not even when the kid begins fussing again, his little eyes squeezing shut.

Taka, of course, immediately begins to coo over the baby, fucking nerd that he is, leaning precariously over Mondo to get a closer look. Mondo automatically places his hand on Taka’s back to stabilize him as the teen presents his finger for Benny to hold, his face completely enraptured. Mondo’s eyes transfer from the baby to Taka, feeling ‘enraptured’ himself. Shit…

“/Oh, he is adorable! Hello, Benny, it is nice to meet you! I am your Uncle Kiyotaka, though you may call me Taka/!” Taka says to the baby in English, talking in his usual forceful manner, not bothering with that ridiculous ‘baby talk’ voice adults usually use around infants. Heh. Nerd, Mondo thinks fondly again, letting out a quiet snort. The sound seems to get Taka’s attention, since the teen is turning his face to look at Mondo with a soft smile then, their faces a lot closer than Mondo is used to. Not that he minds. Not at all. “/Oh! And this is Mondo! He is my, er… my boyfriend! He means a lot to me, and I hope the two of you get along well!”/

Mondo flushes at the praise, averting his eyes away from the overwhelming sunshine that is Taka. His eyes land on the baby, who is looking up at him uncertainly, his tiny chest trembling with his unhappy fussing. He’s not full on crying, but he definitely looks uncomfortable and unhappy. Mondo does his best to smile at the kid, not used to dealing with infants in the slightest, but not so big of a dick that he’d be rude to a literal fucking baby. Like… seriously.

“/Hey, kid. Nice to meet you/,” Mondo says, also in English, though he’s a bit clumsier than Taka was. Daiya taught him English when he was little, but he doesn’t get a chance to practice speaking the language often, so he’s a bit clumsier speaking than he is listening. The kid doesn’t seem to mind. Honestly, Mondo doesn’t know if the kid can understand him at all. He’s five months old, yeah? Is that old enough for them to understand shit yet? Mondo has no fucking clue.

Alex gives Mondo a surprised look for some reason (what, didn’t expect him to know English? Jackass), but doesn’t get a chance to say anything more, since at that moment, everyone who was helping set up the table comes back into the room and heads for their seat, though there are a lot of happy greetings made as they go along that prolongs the endeavor. Mondo just watches as this happens, feeling decidedly uncomfortable as more and more family members spill into the room, his heart beating fast as he realizes that this is it. He’s fucking meeting all of Taka’s goddamn family now. As his fucking /boyfriend/, even though they definitely are /not fucking boyfriends/. Which is… shit. Whatever. Whatever, he agreed to this fucking plan, he doesn’t fucking care. Fuck.

Mondo is still slightly distracted when Yoshi returns with a happy hum, plopping down onto the cushion beside him, giving them a happy grin as she takes Benny from her husband without a word. Alex gives up the kid without question, his attention going to the child sleeping on his lap, seamless and easy, like it’s something they’ve done a thousand times. It makes Mondo even more uncomfortable, like every interaction he witnesses between an actual functional family unit. He struggles to ignore it. It doesn’t fucking matter. None of this fucking matters.

“Hey Taka, Mondo-san! Did you guys sleep well?” Yoshi asks them in Japanese, head tilted and smile easy. Mondo feels awkward around the chick, remembering how fucking /scared/ she looked when she realized who he was, but Taka has no such reservations. The teen just nods happily, still leaning over Mondo to get a better look at his cousin and ‘nephew.’

“Yes, we did Yoshi! Thank you for asking! We were just talking to Alex about Benny! He’s very adorable!” Taka exclaims, still singularly focused on the kid. It makes Mondo snort again, shifting to get more comfortable, seeing that the teen is not intending to go anywhere anytime soon. The new position has Mondo’s arm wrapped loosely around Taka’s waist while Taka kneels practically on his lap, but, uh… shit, whatever. They’re close friends, it’s not like it’s fucking /weird/ or anything. And they’re masquerading as boyfriends. It’s fine. Taka doesn’t even seem to notice, as focused as he is on the kid, so it’s fucking /fine/.

“Aw, thanks Cuz! He really is a little cutie pie, isn’t he? He’s usually such a happy and upbeat baby, but he’s unfortunately got a bit of an earache today. I’m hoping it goes away by morning and he’ll be back to his usual bouncy self soon,” Yoshi explains, giving her kid a small, concerned look. Taka hums worriedly as well, frowning with concern as he leans closer to look at the kid. This unfortunately lands him firmly in Mondo’s lap this time, Taka practically lounging across him, his heat scalding. But it’s, ya know… fine. Totally cool. Not like Mondo is internally panicking or anything, no sirree!

/Fuck/.

“Yes, I hope so too, Yoshi! I would hate if he was suffering throughout the entire gathering! I’m sure it’s already confusing enough for him to be surrounded by so many people; doing so sick would decidedly be unpleasant! You have my fervent wish that he gets better soon!” Taka proclaims, sounding as serious and forceful as he does about everything.

Mondo can’t help the warmth that blooms inside his chest as Taka says this, nor can he stop how he looks at the teen, smile soft and eyes practically smitten. He knows he shouldn’t look like that, knows it tells shit he doesn’t want told, but… shit. Shit, shit, god fucking dammit. He can’t help it, okay?! Taka is just so fucking… /Taka/ and he can’t help the way he looks at the teen! He never fucking could…

Apparently he’s not the only one who finds Taka’s proclamation endearing, though. Yoshi lets out a small laugh, her eyes squinting as she looks at Taka, her expression definitely fond. It does nothing to dim the warmth in Mondo’s chest, and he suddenly feels very glad that Taka has someone in his extended family who genuinely seems to appreciate him. He knows how much the hall monitor struggled to make friends growing up, knows that he was actually Taka’s first real friend, so to see that at least Taka had /someone/ is… a lot. It might even be everything. Fuck.

“God, never change, Cuz. Never change,” Yoshi grins, echoing Mondo’s sentiments exactly. Taka jolts a little at the comment, his cheeks flushing with his obvious embarrassment. Mondo can’t tear his eyes away as Taka ducks his head and smiles bashfully, looking so fucking /pleased/. Goddamnit, it should be a crime to be so fucking adorable. It really fucking should.

“Ah! T-thank you! I, er… will try not to!” is Taka’s eventual answer, as awkward and adorable as the nerd himself. Mondo tightens his hold on Taka unconsciously, not sure why he does it, but just… wanting to feel him. In a, ya know. Brotherly way.

Unfortunately, the action seems to remind Taka of their position. Taka jolts again and turns his eyes to Mondo, the blush deepening as the teen hurriedly scrambles off of him, stammering as he goes. Mondo has to fight his disappointment and just watches as the hall monitor goes, listening to his hurried (and needless) apologies.

“Ah! M-Mondo, I… I’m so sorry! I did not mean to lean over you like that, ky- ah, kareshi! I hadn’t been thinking and it was a complete accident, one I assure you will not happen again, and-“

“It’s fine, man,” Mondo interrupts gently, taking care to remember his ‘formal’ voice this time. Yoshi is listening, after all. And most likely Taka’s parents, who have taken their seat on the other side of the teen. Which is… shit, not the time to focus on that. “I don’t mind. We’re, you know… dating. Don’t mind you being close to me. I’ve never minded that.”

Mondo gives Taka a significant look, hoping his kyoudai will understand what he means. Which is that they’re close, they’re fucking /brothers/, and he never minds when Taka gets close to him. Never. No matter the reason. He doesn’t know if Taka gets it, but the dude does go a shade brighter and his smile a bit shyer, so he understood /something/. Which is… yeah. Yeah.

Luckily, that moment is cut blissfully short by Hana clearing her throat, the entire table coming to attention as they turn their gaze towards her respectfully. Mondo follows suit, sweating fucking bullets, but like hell is he gonna fuck this shit up so quickly. He’s not that big of a dumbass. Even if it is getting so much harder to fucking breathe…

“Welcome, family. It has been far too long since we were last able to all gather together like this. It is a pleasure to see you all again, and to meet our newest additions,” Hana begins, her eyes first sweeping over towards Benny, and then, surprisingly, to him. Her eyes are piercing as they look at him, as piercing as Taka’s eyes have always been, and it makes his blood run cold. It makes his brain go a little funny, his breathing speeding up for reasons he can’t quite explain, and despite the fact he tries so fucking hard to push it down and pay attention, he finds it nearly impossible. Not when he can still feel that phantom stare on him, piercing him, /judging him/, s-shit…

His distraction causes him to tune out most of the speech, the words distant in his mind, like he’s listening through water. From what he can hear, he thinks it’s mostly about how it’s nice to make time to meet up with family and that familial ties are what are most important in life. He stops listening entirely then, his stomach clenching the way it always does when people talk about family, the envy and jealousy he hates rising bitterly inside of him. It’s all he can do to push it down, eyes hard on the table, his hands clenched in tight fists by his side. He knows he’s being ridiculous, knows he shouldn’t care about this shit, but it’s fucking /hard/, alright? It’s always been hard, from the time he was four years old and realized that the man who hated his guts was actually supposed to love him and not beat the shit out of him on a daily fucking basis, god fucking /dammit/-

“Are you okay, kyoudai?” Mondo hears whispered into his ear an unknown amount of time later, though he thinks it’s only been a couple of minutes, causing him to shudder. His eyes dart to the side to look into concerned scarlet, the most beautiful color he’s ever fucking seen. Even in a room surrounded by red, Mondo is positive that these eyes are the most splendid. The most expressive. The most luminescent, and all those other fucking words Taka’s been teaching him over the past year. He gets a bit lost in them, honestly, looking and searching and feeling. What he’s feeling, he has no fucking clue, but it sure is /something/.

“Mondo…?” Taka asks again, after a few moments pass and Mondo says nothing. The teen also reaches out and places his hand gently overtop Mondo’s, looking so concerned it makes Mondo’s breath hitch, not sure how to fucking handle this. He’s never known how to handle Taka. Especially not when he gets all concerned like this. Fuck, but he can’t continue to say nothing and just fucking /stare/ at Taka, he’ll concern the shit outta the dude, he’s gotta fucking say something /right the fuck now, you goddamn piece of shit/-

“Yeah. Yeah, I… I’m fine, man. Just… ya know what I’m like with family shit,” Mondo mumbles, cheeks heating up, shrugging awkwardly. But it’s true. Taka… Taka does know. Taka is prolly the only person he’s ever told about the shit his old man would do to him, the abuse he faced at the hands of a man who was supposed to love him. In fact, the day he told Taka about that shit was the first time he allowed Taka to hold him as they fell asleep, his eyes leaking pathetic tears as his kyoudai whispered soothing words to him, promising him that he didn’t deserve the shit his old man had done. Mondo… Mondo hates thinking about that day, as embarrassing as it had been. The way his heart races every time he thinks about it is even worse, though, so he quickly pushes the memory aside.

“Ah… yes, I- I do know… i-if this is too much for you, kyoudai, we could always retire early, if you’d like? I’m sure my family wouldn’t mind too much…” Taka trails off, sounding uncertain. It makes Mondo snort, giving Taka an unimpressed look. If there is one thing that Mondo has learned about Taka’s family in the short amount of time he’s known them, it’s that they absolutely /would/ mind if he left early. Well… half of them would. The other half would be forcefully worried, constantly bugging him if he was alright, and honestly, he’s not sure which he’d want the least, thanks.

“Nah. Nah, I’m fine, man. I’ll be fine. Don’t worry ‘bout me, ‘kay?” Mondo mutters back after a moment, before looking back around the table, noticing that the speech seems to be over and everyone is reaching out to grab some food. Hoping that he’s not making some social faux paus, Mondo reaches out blindly to grab something, not really caring what. When he sees the bowl of white rice he’d managed to snag, he figures that’s as good a place as any to start and begins loading up his plate. He fucking loves rice, could eat three whole plates of the shit in a row, really.

Taka doesn’t seem convinced, his eyebrows still all furrowed and his lips pulled down into a pissy little frown, but thankfully he turns away before Mondo can get too annoyed by the stare. With a soft sigh, Taka reaches forward and grabs the bowl of rice Mondo has finished with, giving him a soft, somewhat awkward smile.

“If you say so, my friend. But I will always worry about you. It is my duty as your best friend, after all!” Taka exclaims, voice still quiet enough to hopefully not be overheard, but still as forceful as ever. It makes Mondo relax again, his lips pulled up into a gentle smile as he looks at the teen, so fucking glad to have him. Like always…

“Heh. Yeah, ‘course,” he replies absently back, feeling soothed.

After that, no more words are exchanged between them, the pair happily grabbing the food that interests them, swapping it with the rest of the family around the table while Taka converses with those near him, seeming to be engrossed in the conversation. It makes Mondo feels hella awkward at first, not sure how to ask someone to pass him the shit he wants, not wanting to accidentally offend anyone and not wanting to interrupt Taka’s conversation. Luckily, it seems that Yoshi notices his predicament and begins grabbing the shit that Mondo is looking at, passing it to him with a wide smile even while holding her kid. It’s honestly kind of impressive.

“Thanks,” Mondo mutters after she’s done it for the fourth time, cheeks a little heated at needing the help. Yoshi doesn’t hold it against him, though. She just waves her hand carelessly, her eyes twinkling as she looks at him.

“Don’t mention it! Anything for Taka’s boyfriend,” she states, her words teasing. Mondo usually hates being teased, and he can even feel the discomfort bubble inside his chest, but… it’s surprisingly not as bad as it usually is. Something about Yoshi makes Mondo feel at ease. Honestly… she kind of reminds him of Daiya a little. If Daiya were an energetic, nosy chick. Which, considering who his brother is… heh.

Overall, the dinner is… nice. Simple. No one really engages Mondo in conversation, but he honestly prefers it that way. It’s easier for him to spend the time observing the family from an outside perspective, watching them as they interact. And it’s… honestly kinda fascinating. While they’re seated fairly far from each other, Mondo can see how Taka’s stuck up family interacts with the rest of them, their noses upturned and their demeanor haughty. Despite that, they still seem to be engaging in conversation, the rest of the family not seeming to mind the clipped words or the haughty tone. Though, every so often Mondo will see a teenage boy roughly Taka’s age— who Mondo believes might be Taka’s second cousin Eichi, who’s apparently the biggest fucking asshole around— turn to face them with a smug little smirk on his face, eyes dark with amusement, but luckily the shithead never says anything directly to them. Which is good. Mondo’s supposed to be on his best behavior here. Punching the lights out of Taka’s cousin would kinda ruin that shit.

But that doesn’t happen. And Mondo is mostly left alone while Taka speaks to his various family members, seeming happy. Mondo entertains himself for a few minutes watching Taka enthusiastically talk to his ‘uncle’ Akihiko, the happy bachelor who also apparently arrived sometime when they were in their room. From what Mondo can tell, they’re talking politics, Taka trying to get the older man to understand the importance of some policy or other, though the man seems mostly to be humoring the teen, nodding and humming when appropriate with an indulgent smirk on his lips. From what Taka has told him about the man, he’s a lot more laid back than anyone in the family, enjoying to ‘go with the flow’ rather than having any concrete plans in life. It often puts him and Taka at odds, Taka aghast as someone not caring about every last little thing possible, but despite that the pair seems to get along well. It’s definitely entertaining to watch the two, he’ll say that…

This continues on for a little while, nothing too out of the ordinary happening, Mondo able to just zone out and chill while eating some honestly super delicious food. In fact, Mondo is just about thinking that the whole dinner is going to go on in a similar manner, the even not nearly as bad as he’d feared, when he gets distracted by a small commotion to his right.

Head turning automatically, Mondo watches absently as Samantha— who has been sleeping merrily on her da’s lap this entire time, not stirring even with the loud noise— abruptly wakes up and begins fussing. Loudly.

Without even looking away from her conversation partner, Yoshi immediately begins to hand little Benny over to Alex, the man accepting the bundle without question. Then, still talking to one of the various cousins, the chick grabs her daughter and brings her onto her lap, bouncing her leg immediately to try and soothe the cranky toddler. The whole interaction takes maybe five seconds, maybe less, and it leaves Mondo feeling… something. What that something is, he doesn’t know, but it definitely feels twisted, so he determines to not examine it too closely, thanks.

But then… for reasons he absolutely doesn’t understand…

Mondo enters into a conversation with Samantha. The fucking /infant/.

And it’s not really a conversation. She’s like… fucking /three/ and her grasp on language is iffy at best. In fact, she’s clearly being taught both English and Japanese at home, since she’s babbling in a confusing mix of the two, Mondo having to stare at her with furrowed brows to try and understand a goddamn word. And as for why the hell he’s even bothering, well… it would be rude to ignore her, ya know? Especially after she makes it abundantly clear she‘s speaking to him when she grabs his arm and yanks painfully on his skin, babbling a sharp reprimand when he dares to look away from her after a minute of absently watching her babble.

Yoshi finally looks away from her conversation at that, looking down at her daughter with disapproval, chiding her gently about her actions. The chick then gives Mondo an apologetic look, but he immediately waves it off.

“It’s fine, I, uh… don’t mind,” he mutters, and finds that it‘s strangely true. He honestly doesn’t. Yoshi gives him a curious look at that, and for a second Mondo thinks that the chick is gonna be mad at him for, he doesn’t know… interacting with her precious child and soiling her with his rough lifestyle. But no. Instead, Yoshi just nods happily after a moment and goes back to her conversation, Samantha tugging on his arm again to get his attention. And, well… it’s not like he’s got anything better to do…

And so, that’s how Mondo finds himself wrapped up in the most convoluted, confusing conversation he’s ever found himself in, which is saying a lot considering who his kyoudai is. Honestly, Mondo doesn’t think he’s ever spoken to a three year old before, and he’s gotta admit that he’s glad for it. Don’t get him wrong, the kid is kinda cute and he doesn’t really regret entering into this ‘conversation’. But goddamn is it confusing.

More than the kid constantly switching between English and Japanese, it seems that she doesn’t know what she wants to talk about. Every five seconds she starts talking about another topic, sounding just as enthusiastic as she had before. After about three minutes of this, Mondo absently wonders if this was what Taka was like as a child. Endlessly enthusiastic and painfully confusing. Somehow, the thought makes him feel less awkward about the whole situation, his lips smiling fondly as he thinks of his kyoudai acting like this little girl when he was a kid. It’s honestly not that hard to imagine.

This ‘conversation’ between them lasts for about ten minutes, Mondo not really contributing to the conversation, but not minding listening to the kid babble. It’s honestly kinda cute, not gonna lie. He makes sure to nod along and make some noises that indicate that he’s listening, not wanting to be rude to the fucking kid, and it seems she’s happy enough with just babbling along. At one point he sees Taka look over at him and Samantha, pausing briefly in his conversation with his ‘uncle’ to give Mondo a wide eyed stare, before giving him a blinding smile. He doesn’t say anything, though, and instead just returns to his previous conversation, though his smile never fully fades from his lips. Mondo tries not to focus on it, but his chest definitely begins to bloom with a bright, hot /something/ at that fact. It’s hella distracting, though, so Mondo redoubles his efforts of following along with whatever the kid is saying, kind of able to make out that she’s rambling about something she did with her ‘dada’ the other day. It’s honestly hella cute, her little baby voice endearing, so Mondo doesn’t mind putting his full attention on the kid, humming with acknowledgment whenever it seems appropriate.

What Mondo does mind, however, is when the kid decides it’s a good fucking idea to climb off her mother’s lap and onto /his/ during a lull in their ‘conversation’.

Well… ‘mind’ is a bit strong of a word. Honestly, he’s more surprised than anything, eyes wide as he looks down at the dark brown curls he can see under his chin. He’s never had a kid decide to sit in his fucking lap before. It’s… weird.

It also makes Yoshi abruptly end her conversation, her red eyes wide and her lips pulled down into a frown as she looks at her daughter.

“Samantha,” Yoshi hisses, looking embarrassed as she reaches out for the kid, shooting Mondo an apologetic look. The kid, however, evades her mother’s hands and settles herself firmly on his lap under his arm, her lip jutted out in a stubborn pout. She babbles something angrily at her mother, stubborn as all hell, and it makes Mondo smirk a little. What can he say, he likes the kid’s spunk.

What he doesn’t like is how the commotion cuts across the entire table, everyone going quiet as they turn to look at what’s causing the problem. It makes Mondo flush, anxiety rising in his chest to see everyone staring at him— /judging him/— and he knows he has to defuse this situation as quick as he fucking can before something happens. What might happen, he doesn’t know. But knowing him and his anger when people judge him…

“It’s okay. I don’t mind,” Mondo mumbles to Yoshi, his hands still awkwardly at his sides as he darts a look between the kid in his lap and the chick sitting next to him. Yoshi looks uncertain about something, and for a moment Mondo thinks she’s upset because he’s a fucking biker and she doesn’t trust her kid with him. Which is… shit, /fair/, but he fucking hates it, he hates it, he fucking-

“Are you sure Mondo-san? I know how pushy Sammy can be, you don’t have to entertain her if you don’t want to. I can take her out of the room to calm down, it’s not a problem,” Yoshi replies softly, giving him a concerned look. She seems fairly genuine, too, like her concern is about him and his comfort, not… shit. Anything else.

Taking a deep breath to shove everything down, he gives the chick a crooked half smile, shrugging as casually as he can while he shifts to get more comfortable. It makes Sam grumble, the girl pouting up at him, which strangely helps settle him more. What can he say. He’s unfairly fond of stubborn as shit, bossy, red eyed people.

“Nah, it’s, uh… it’s cool. She isn’t bothering me,” Mondo claims, voice still quiet to prevent eavesdroppers. Yoshi still seems a bit uncertain, like she isn’t sure if he’s just being a martyr or not, but after a moment, she nods hesitantly and goes back to her dinner, darting frequent looks at the two of them. Mondo keeps himself as loose as possible, staring unseeing at the table, trying to ignore the fucking stares. God, does he hate people staring at him. Shit’s the fucking worst.

Fortunately, people seem to grow bored of staring when nothing is going on, and soon enough everyone is going back to their own conversations, all seeming to accept that things are fine now. This relieves Mondo so fucking much, and it doesn’t take long for him to relax as well. Yeah, he has a fucking /kid/ in his goddamn lap, and he has no idea how to handle that shit, but hey. At least people aren’t staring at him anymore. Or… most people…

“I ain’t gonna explode man. Ya don’t gotta look at me like that,” Mondo mutters towards Taka a few minutes later, noticing that the teen is still staring at him weirdly. Taka jolts a little at the comment, eyes wide and cheeks flushing. He hurriedly looks away, embarrassed.

“S-sorry, k-kareshi. I didn’t think you were going to explode, I just… a-ah. I hadn’t known you were good with children, is all,” Taka mumbles to him after a moment, giving him the shyest fucking look through his goddamn eyelashes. It makes Mondo flush in response, his eyes falling to the table, not sure how to respond to that. Because… shit, he ain’t good with kids. Or… he’s never really been around kids much, so he can’t say one way or another if he’s good with them or not. He just isn’t a fucking dick to little kids, ya know? And if a fucking three year old wants to climb on his lap and babble nonsense to him, what does he care? As long as she doesn’t kick him anywhere sensitive, he doesn’t mind. And he’s gotta admit… it is kinda cute how she’ll ramble on and on about absolutely anything, not caring that he has absolutely no idea what she’s saying. As long as he makes the appropriate noises, she’s golden.

It’s also kinda cute how she’ll tug on his arm every so often, point to a type of food she wants to eat, and say something (in either English or Japanese, whichever one comes to her mind first) like ‘peas’ or ‘gimme’ or ‘dat one, tanks.’ And then, once he dutifully grabs the desired food, she’ll reach out to eat it with her hands, regardless of what it is he put in front of her. He’s super fucking glad he’s not wearing his coat or else she’d have gotten food all over it, which would not fly. As it is, she’s just ruining this stupid as shit polo and slacks he got hella cheap, so he doesn’t give a shit.

Anyway… all of that besides, he’s not sure why Taka thinks he’s suddenly ‘good with kids,’ but whatever. Not like it bothers him. He’d worry about his image, but a) he’s supposed to be trying to be seen as an upstanding citizen of society here, and b) who the fuck says bikers can’t be nice to kids? Most bikers he knows are super nice to kids. In fact, anyone who isn’t gets the beating of their life from him. It’s actually a fucking rule of his gang: don’t be a fucking dick to kids. So… yeah. Whatever.

“I ain’t, just… I dunno. Ain’t gonna be rude ta a kid. Ya know?” Mondo eventually says, a few moments later, voice as quiet as he can go to prevent more eavesdropping. Taka hums, nodding slowly, turning to look at him with a small smile. Shit…

“I don’t know, kareshi. You seem fairly good with Samantha. I know for a fact that she can be, er… a bit much. Not many would be willing to listen to her conversations, let alone let her climb onto their lap. It’s… admirable,” Taka mutters in reply, eyes glittering in the low lighting, admiration clear within them. It causes Mondo’s throat to grow dry, and he has to look back at the table to prevent himself from saying (or /doing/) anything stupid. Goddamn.

Dinner continues on after that, the kid in his lap happily babbling about anything and pointing to the food she wants, while Mondo listens with half an ear and responds when appropriate. The rest of the table continues on with their own conversations, everything seeming happy and very… homey. At no point does the discomfort within him go away, but it does settle a little as the meal goes on, enough so that he’s able to eat a fairly substantial amount of the super fucking bomb food that was made. He even manages to enter a small conversation with Yoshi and Alex, who ask him about his gang and what it’s like to lead. All in all, while it’s definitely not his scene, Mondo finds that the dinner is… not that bad. Could be worse, definitely.

Eventually, the meal does end, the mountain of food dwindled to dregs only and everyone at various stages of exhausted. Taka is leaning subtly against his shoulder, his eyes drooping every few seconds, which tells Mondo that he’s super fucking tired, even after his nap earlier. Mondo doesn’t mind the dude leaning against him and just moves a bit to give Taka more room, shifting Sam a little to make them all a bit more comfortable. Unfortunately, moving wakes Taka up, his kyoudai blinking at him sleepily while his cheeks flush bright pink.

“Ah, s-sorry, kyoudai… I must be more tired than I thought,” Taka mumbles, still looking exhausted. Mondo chuckles, turning to face Taka fondly.

“It’s okay, man. I don’t mind. But, uh… we should prolly head ta bed. Yer lookin’ pretty sleepy, Kiyo,” Mondo mumbles in reply, lifting a hand to absently run it through his kyoudai’s hair. He feels Taka stiffen for a second, but before he can worry that he did something wrong, the teen is relaxing with a soft, happy sigh, leaning further into his side without a care. It makes Mondo smile, the sight honestly super fucking adorable. It gets even cuter when Sam decides she’s also sleepy and so she shifts so that she can rest her head against his chest, her little hand reaching out to grab Taka’s sleeve. Taka smiles gently at the little girl, and Mondo has a moment to think that it’s not just him that’s supposedly good with kids.

His thoughts get interrupted when he hears Taka’s great aunt clear her throat again, a hush falling over the brood. Mondo respectfully turns his head to face the woman, knowing that if he were to show her even the slightest hint of disrespect things would be all over for him. If there’s one thing he’s learned most from his few hours here, it’s that everyone in the family adores the matriarch and wouldn’t tolerate any disrespect.

~~~~

Aaaaand that's all she wrote, folks. Like I said, I have a ton of ideas for this fic, it's just hard writing them down. And connecting all the ideas together. If you did like this fic, please let me know, though! I cannot guarantee it ever getting finished, but I do like the premise and I like what I have written so far.

Also, I hope the kids seemed realistic, ha. As I've mentioned on here before, I work with kids, so I tried to model the kids on the kids I work with. Samantha was based off a friend to a kid I used to babysit, who was three when I met her and LOVED to talk about anything. Her name was also Samantha, which is why I named the character that, giving her an American dad to excuse it. ^-^

#The Ultimate (Fake) Boyfriend #Danganronpa #Danganronpa fanfiction #Mondo's POV #Kiyotaka Ishimaru #Mondo Owada #My fanfic #OCs #WIP

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failureofmylife · 2 years

Text

a hacker

just sent me a bit of drama. I have verified none of this, and it all seems outlandish because a NFT bro being humble? Everything has a first time but this is stretching my capacity for suspension of disbelief.

Bored Ape aficionado franklinisbored has apparently found a new source of entertainment by placing high bids on his own ENS domains with amusing names, causing a Twitter bot that announces ENS domain offers to tweet about it. After amusing himself by placing 100 ETH bids on joebiden.eth, elonmusk.eth, barackhusseinobama.eth, and donaldjtrumpjr.eth, he solicited suggestions on Twitter for what ENS domain he should create and then place a fake bid on next. Based on a follower's suggestion, he created the ENS domain stop-doing-fake-bids-its-honestly-lame-my-guy.eth and placed a 100 ETH bid on it. To his surprise, another person came along and offered him 1.9 ETH (~$2,900). Apparently excited to receive a sizeable offer for a gag NFT, franklinisbored accepted the offer and took to Twitter to write about his good fortune: "Well this is the most surprising 1.891 ETH I have ever made. I owe it all to #ENS and @gweiman_eth's creative idea. #Marketing101". Meanwhile, he had forgotten to cancel his joke 100 ETH offer, which remained active. The new buyer accepted the offer and sold the NFT back to him, pocketing 98 ETH in the process. Franklinisbored wrote on Twitter, "I was celebrating my joke of a domain sale, sharing the spoils, but in a dream of greed, forgot to cancel my own bid of 100 ETH to buy it back. This will be the joke and bag fumble of the century. I deserve all of the jokes and criticism." He also sent the 1.9 ETH back to the other person, with a message asking them to reverse the transaction. The other person replied, "No, thank you for the money though."

That is exactly as it was presented to me. Now, is this true, and if so does he deserve it? I have no idea. What I do know is that everyone involved in NFTs can afford to lose the money. At least everyone I have heard of. Like all scams this is supposed to be directional; all money is supposed to flow to people who got in on the scam early. Latecomers are the ones supposed to ‘get it in the arse’ to borrow an expression.

Apparently not this time.

Remember, outwitting NFT bros is not a sin. It is a feature.

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