#except im the stupid shit

[reesescuffs]

DOING ONE OF THESE SO I HAVE BIO SPACE ‼️‼️‼️‼️

aka me repurposing an old post for those silly intro post things 😻

Hi!!! I'm Reese Reesep Jeesep.

‼️‼️Please note: I am a minor, and will be for the foreseeable future‼️‼️

Any prns (only neos are xe/xem tho 😋)

I happen to be a queer (shocking I know)

I have a variety of intrest!

Including:

Homestuck

Mcyt (e.g life series, empires, hermitcraft)

Osc (Mainy ii and bdfi)

Currently hyper-fixated on:

Grian minecraft 😿

This blog is just me being a silly little guy™ and drawing sometimes 🤭🤷‍♀️

Expect emojis I. Love. Emojis. 🤭😻🥰🎉

Use the magnify glass thingy for the commen tags idk anymore I just wanted bio space 😿😿

#this is dumb #i only write this for the bio space #dont look dont read #just... let me be silly in peace... #moot dont interact with this i beg of you save me the embarrassment. #reese ranting about stupid shit #except im the stupid shit

[bull-shit-suji]

not to like wax poetic about the literary nuances of Black Fucking Butler but i feel i need to point out how insanely campy it is. oh okay cool the butler is throwing butter knives at people with guns and winning. we're battling undertaker's zombie army by starting a boy band (we actually got the idea from the ZOMBIES' boy band). theres a curry making competition and its so important it needs an entire volume and a continuing motif dedicated to it. the Grim Reaper Death Gods are all cornballs with gardening sheers. the contradiction. the unintended irony.

i think the manga is like. toeing the line of camp. like its silly yet takes itself so seriously but its not too silly. my immersion is not broken by the silliness. but the anime is uncharted levels of camp. what the Hell was going on with pluto. you're gonna look me in the eye and tell me the phantomhives own a fifty foot dog thing and no one has noticed. simply one hell of a deer. ice skating. theres opium in funtom candy. the queen of england is maybe a little girl. speaking of which, the city of london just burned down. yeah the whole thing. the fifty foot dog was there too.

it's so ridiculously out of left field and the fact that none of the characters seem to notice or care feels like being gaslit. camp so visceral it's causing psychic damage. i am constantly begging the narrative to break character just once and acknowledge its silliness but doing so would negate the lack of awareness that makes it camp. its dated and timeless. an absolute milestone in camp history.

#it's 2 am im not articulating my thoughts well #just like. ohhhhhhhhg death and demons and walking the line between good and evil #dark acedemia vampire victorian vibes. except theres always some stupid shit happening with no explination. #like i know the tone shifts intentionally sometimes to match the haha comedic moment #thats not what im talking about #i mean when the most ridiculous plotline ever concieved is presented as a life or death situation #and after a while you're like lol this isnt dark at all and then BAM abuse trauma ptsd manipulation cults murders #the bittersweet understanding in clawing your way to the top #knowing the moment your revenge is exacted you will be consumed by the very thing that got you here #and choosing to keep climbing anyways #then boom back on that bullshit here's these motherfuckers in wonderland #the dark tone we had for all that trauma shit will Not be changing because catgirl grelle is just as serious of a topic #okay im going to bed #black butler #kuroshitsuji #sebastian michaelis #manga #ciel phantomhive #textpost #prev rb #oh i think the point i was trying to make it that its good because its camp #would not be nearly as awesome if it werent

[shippyo]

This is random drama im looking at rn from captain laserhawk fandom,i dont post about i know but i like its content,so feel free to ignore my rage moment cause hhhhhh ill be very angry<3 /

istg the rayfrog drama is the dumbest shit alive in the clh fandom AUHGG💀

no it isnt pedophilic and yes im pointing and you people who said that dumbest shit,directly to your eyes BWBDBE

Just cause in your head you just made it up,ITS NOOOOT CANON,they are both adults,rayman is a guy who literally can live/sleep 100 years and mf can't age physically after origins,he is a ageless, a literal magical fantasyland creature made by gods,its actual creepier that you guys infantilize bullfrog on trying to make him like some kind of CHILD or teen who barely got to be an adult when in reality he is an old grown ass man who has been being an assasing for who knows how many years,that you guys had more that mindest speaks more of how creepy you are,stop infantilize grown ass adults istg

u can not like or u can feel uncomfy with rayfrog like thats absolutly fine dont get me wrong,that is not the problem and u can have for whatever reason,if u hc that they had an age gap,if they are just friends,familiar stuff,like other ship related to Bullfrog or idk but, don't try to made up arguments and do shit ass ship wars,they are adults PERIOD,grow up and stop crying about it,just block tags or be healthier for your own life to just shrugh about it and move on ITS NOT HARD 💀

#rayfrog #drama discussion #like HECC this dang ass ship isnt even my stupid cup of tea #i can give two shits about it except for unwanted MMMSUUS art on my sfw twitter #but people bitching about it is like UHHHHGGRRRR #move on really #is not hard i promise #but istg for all the drama i had the mental state of #please made the ship canon so people cna stfu #or with dolph there too so we csn have the fun polys #OR KILL THEM ALL SO WE DONT DISCUSS MORE SHIT XD #captain laserhawk #and if u go to try to argue with me ill just send to u a video of “touch grass” from youtube #cause im not arguing more than this once cause my time is more valuable

[queenie-blackthorn]

sometimes i feel like i hate everyone

#if i ever say “i hate you” dont take it personally #everyone does stupid shit sometimes n thats fine but its happening sm and im sick of it n i need to speak up #chances are if u see this ur not part of the problem bc ur actually reading the shit i post #the fact that barely anyone realized that i relapsed into sh yesterday is crazy #im not doing this for attention its a fucking cry for help and most of yall are ignoring me #you ignore me when im fine and you ignore me when i need you #what am i supposed to do ffs #do i have to show you my bleeding thighs for you to ask how i am? #do you have to wait until i scream and cry and hurt myself for you to care abt me? #do i not matter unless im hurting? or do i not matter even when i am hurting? #do i have to fucking die for any of yall to realize theres something mentally wrong w me? #fuck you all youre just as bad as my parents #except for the four people who talked me out of spiralling last night #two of which were people i barely/dont know #so yeah maybe try harder n actually ask ur friends how they are #dont push them to the point where they need to be comforted by strangers

[impala-dreamer]

is this too romantic? am I going too far? is there any other way to write romance than all in, all encompassing, perfectly magical? no. this is fine.

#talking to myself as i write #it's so flufffffyyyyyy #i should write romcoms i'd really be great at it #except someone would inexpicably die or get shot out of nowhere #and then ya know #“dying in the rain talking about theology” #classic me #also fuck you bc theres so much i cant share anymore #because you took it all away #why am i rambling in the tags agani #no one reads anyway #so screw you you hurt me #but im not going anywhere #i'm gonna stay here and write this stupid fluffy romanctic shit #and love it #and then i'll write my dean and jensen and misha #and i will love that too #and someday i won't be so sad or indifferently angry at you #and maybe i'll get back to writing what i used to but cant now bc you took it from me #i should delete this but honestly no #i'm not goinig to #now im just curious to how manyt ags i can have #someone count this i cant math #anyway whatever #writing #henry cavill #whatttttttt

[ssstrawberryflowers]

well this morning as I woke up from a 4 or so hour night of sleep i had the brilliant idea of trying to fight Gabriel in 3-2 on Violent while listening to a youtube video, with no in-game music, relatively low in-game master sound and without having actually beaten him (on Violent) after having spent over three hours and a half exclusively trying to kick his ass a few days ago.

so. uhm. yeah. drew how it felt (while also remaining as vague as i could as to not upset anyone lol)

this was both surprisingly hard but also relatively quick? in a weird sort of way? idk girl

screenshots below if you care lol

the 3h30 hour attempt proof (i quit at fucking 3 am my wrists were sore as fuck)

the one successful attempt (was surprisingly quicker than expected)

so uh. yea. laughed really loudly when i did beat him and when he called me an insignificant fuck again. 11/10 will do again.

#my favorite thing to do in ultrakill (aside from bullying V2 into oblivion) is dying to my own projectile boosts <33 #really though i'm sorry this is yet another stupid post and not actual art i just thought this was kinda funny; art is being made i promise #shredding through his health in his first phase is actually really easy i think; it just gets real hard once he goes angy #like just send four coins in the air and hit them with the railcanon (except i was too dumb to do a proper railcoin because ah eto bleh) #but his swords dance attack when he enters his second phase as well as his increased speed are really hard to figure out #also his timings are so different from standard!!! somehow i could parry some of his slashes but almost none of his light hatchets!! #what the fuck!!!! aaaaaa #really though beating Gabriel again was actually fun as hell fr #oh yeah the video i was listening to was a woman commenting on a “healthy christian sex course” while also giving advice and stuff #chose it cause it was almost four hours long and i didn't know how much it might take me to beat Gabe (also cause irony) #(my sense of humour is busted as fuck and really bad and im sorry) #ultrakill #gabriel ultrakill #hb talks #dumb shit #shitpost #←i think. maybe #again if you read through all of this shit i love you <3

[definitelynotnia]

im sorry i have to rant im so fucking pissed

my exams end on 19th and I have to get rid of some books and buy some books which are quite pricy online so I had planned on going to college street on 20th and selling my books and buying the new ones at a cheap price and i was frankly really excited about it because all I get is a one day break to relax bcz i have to start studying for entrances from 21st so all I have is 20th and i wanted to spend it at college street and then get some food and basically have like a solo date kind of thing.

and i was so so excited about it i told my boyfriend about it like 500 times bcz i kept forgetting i've already mentioned it and it was literally on my mind a lott so i kept bringing it up and ik it seems like not a big deal cz i can just sit at home and chill too but i literally do not get to go outside my house. like- the last time i went out was new years eve and after that the only time i've gone out is to school or to give my boards that is it. my mother has some weird like problem wiht me going out like even if i tell her that i just want to go to our terrace for 5 minutes just to get some fresh air she won't even allow that she'll be all suspicious and like sTaNd In ThE bAlCOnY aNd TaKe FrEsH aIr like she herself doesnt leave the house (and blames it on me and my brother ???? when have we ever stopped you bro, she said I HaVe To Be HeRe To KeEp An EyE like im 18 i dont need to be watched 24/7 stop blaming me for choices you put upon yourself) and i just feel so suffocated ALL THE TIME i feel so overstimulated and im so sick of rotting on my bed and i dont want to wait for some birthday party or friends meet up to be able to leave my goddamn house i just wanted to go and have a fun day and get me some books thats it.

anyway so initially the plan was that my mom would go along but something came up so she wanted to postpone it to 21st and i didn't want to bcz i'd already be missing 3 days bcz of my boyfriends birthday, holi and my brothers birthday (all of which are important and i dont want to miss which makes me the villain apparently bcz i should "adjust" and cancel my "parties" instead of trying to stick to my plan bcz that makes me too demanding and selfish apparently) so i suggested that ukw why dont u go do ur thing which came up and i'll go to college street by myself...which is when the solo date idea came which i had really wanted all along but didnt bring up bcz i knew she'd say no but now there's a valid reason for me to go alone so like, its a pretty easy fix i can just go alone but noooo. First of all,

I've been to college street multiple times before so its not like its an unknown area to me

im going by metro which is quite safe

im going when there is stark daylight and i will return home much much before it gets dark and im literally 18

she never lets me go anywhere alone, not even take ubers alone if i want to get back from somewhere my bf has to come drop me everytime and then go backwards to his house which is so so so stupid and i never get to go out alone unless accompanied by family or by a male friend, so obv when i said i'll go to college street alone she refused to let that happen and started screaming about how 'if its so important to go on 20th bcz u dont want to miss a day of studying then cancel ur 'parties' and study then' and i was like no its not about missing a day its just that there's a very easy and logical fix to this problem which is i go alone and its not inconveniencing anyone so why cant i just do that but she will not listen to that bcz im 'adamant' and 'everything has to be according to me' bcz i found a viable solution to the problem. so instead of letting me just go she was literally ready to pay much more money and buy the books online, like.....why cant i just go bro??? (and she keeps telling me im a waste of her money bcz i will amount to nothing in life and my education was a failed investment or wtv so like now why are u wasting more money??? im literally trying to save the money that u 'waste' on me so just let me ???)

anyway i called my dad last night and told him and he was super ok with the idea he said its a good idea that i go alone and that he would speak to her but then today when i asked her if dad spoke to her she said yes, we'll go on 20th and i was like .....we? so apparently she CANCELLED her previously immovable thing for which she wanted me to cancel my 'parties', she cancelled that and agreed to go with me on 20th just so that i dont get to go alone- like ???????????????? what is ur problemmmm

so obv i was super annoyed and i went on a whole ass rant about how i literally struggle to even cross roads bcz i dont know shit about basic travelling bcz all my life ive been in a car and its a running joke with all my guy friends that i 'cannot navigate' and 'dont know any places' and obv??? if im never allowed to go anywhere then how tf will i know the places- the only places i know is bcz recently i've been paying a lot of attention and asking my dad stuff about what roads to take to reach certain places and when i go out with my friends i kind of try and learn a bit but thats it i've only ever gone alone completely alone to two places which is my beauty parlour thats 5 minutes away from my house and one bazaar one time that was 2 bus stops away, thats it. thats my extent of public travelling alone. and now im supposed to go to a whole new STATE for college and i cant even call myself an auto without struggling. and like- is this not a basic life skill??? like ok yeah its not rocket science and i will probably figure it out even if i start later in life but why not now? most of my guy friends literally go everywhere alone, why not me? and my dad agreed with all of this but my mom was just like "you'll be in the hostel only, no need to go out of the campus" like ARE YOU FOR REAL????????? and she's like "if u want to learn skills learn how to cook" like ok yes i will also learn how to cook for sure but i wont have a fucking kitchen in the hostel but somehow cooking is an urgent skill i should learn but going places by myself is unimportant bcz i should just never? leave? the? hostel?

anyway after much screaming and shouting my dad gave up and just cut the call bcz he doesnt want to get into an argument with my mother and my mother was being all suspicious like why do u hAvE tO gO aLoNe AlL oF a SuDdEn even though i literally explained why i want to do this alone but she doesnt think thats valid. so she refuses to let me go and i asked her for one reason why i shouldnt cz usuallt its always "no u have exam what if smthn happens" but now i literally dont even have exam so whats ur excuse now? streets will always be unsafe forever so "what if smthn happens" is not a reason to never let me go out without a man so just gimme one reason and she couldnt give me a single reason she just said "i said no, thats it".

and now she's gone off about how im useless and blah blah and "high maintainance" bcz i want books and "everyone else (some pishi's son) just studies online" and so the whole option of college street is apparently now cancelled and she's trying to set up a whole ass kindle account (half the books i need arent even available as ebooks) just because i wanted to go by myself.

#in our house kids dont stay outside past 6:30pm'' but now all of a sudden its fine for my brother to play #till 10:30 at night #she literally stopped me permanently from going down in the evenings since i was in class 7-8 #this is why ive never had any friends outside of school bcz she wouldnt let me leave ths fucking house #and now that my brother is in class 7 #he's allowed to be out playing with his friends till 10 freaking 30 #he comes home an hour late sometimes...45 minutes and almost always at least 30 minutes late at NIGHT and she says nothing except like #one sentence #yeah im only the villain i only keep u locke #up in the house its all my fault #this is just so damn unfair #like literally insulting #im not a child what is her problem #what sort of fucking solution is 'never leave the hostel' like ok even if i do that what happens then??? after i graduate? #i'll be a 24 year old who doesnt know shit about going from one place to another without a man present] #and then this woman preaches how she 'always raises her son and daughter equally' like srsly shut the fuck up #my whole life i've been told abar late?'' #and for me bcz i would come home 5-10 minutes late nd i did it maybe once or twice she made me completely stop going down to play #5-10 minutes late from 6:30 wherein he comes an hour late from 9 fucking 30 #and this sounds so stupid bcz im an 18 year old now and i dont give a fuck abt how long i got to play but its just unfair dude #with me it was always smthn or the other either exams or she gets miraculously sick every time i want to go out to play #im not even kidding she did a whole “i have fever and ur going to leave me like this and go play?” on me one time bcz i was adamant abt goi #after months of not being able to go bcz of exam or smthn or the other #she did not have any fever it was fucking bullshit #and how am i supposed to help with ur imaginary fever anyway im literally 12 #its so fucking annoying man and then if i say anything at all she'll go on a tirade about how #like YOU DO THOUGH??????? im sorry ur feelings are hurt bcz i said you do smthn that u LITERALLY DO #istg not even 2 days ago she was having a fight with my dad abt how he should teach my brother to learn how to cycle so that he can go buy #groceries #i can cycle

[hella1975]

tams azula is sooo fascinating bc while canon azula doesn't really show her age at all like she's completely desensitised to so much shit 'she is fourteen' is not a justification for ANYTHING both in her own mind and in other people's, in tams she has zuko. and yes the world has been abundantly cruel to her but zuko hasn't. he's basically raised azula and he's done so in a way that she's allowed to show her age, but she still only shows her age in very azula-esque ways. there's no reluctance to see violence like you'd expect from a fourteen-year-old, and like ive said before, that means zuko can't play on that reluctance in order to shield her, but he still wants to shield her from that violence because regardless of what SHE feels about it, as the eldest he knows fundamentally that she shouldn't be seeing certain things no matter how well she can handle them. and seeing zuko effectively PLAY azula in order to protect her is so interesting and complicated and fun

#and also a little heartbreaking bc it's the 'you protect azula but who protects you?' #like in order to shield azula from these things zuko is metaphorically standing in front of her and seeing them himself #as if he's not only sixteen and a child too #but yeah taking azula's canon traits and manipulating into the tamsverse is soooo fun #like the example that inspired this post is how canon azula is logical NOT cruel #like time and time again she follows only the logical route and even actively avoids the cruel route #e.g calling off torture in the boiling rock bc she knew that he was telling the truth and therefore continuing to torture him was illogical #im not saying azula is averse to/incapable of cruelty i just hc that she genuinely just thinks it's stupid #just like any other unnecessary act would be considered stupid. if it's not logical or being used for a greater plan then what's the point? #and tams azula STILL HOLDS THIS TRAIT except because i lean more into her age in tams bc she's been given the freedom with zuko #to liberally be a CHILD without any consequences as a result of that simple thing #her intense logic actually becomes a certain naivety on azula #like she cannot comprehend other people NOT coming to the conclusions she comes to #and that expands to needless cruelty. like she wont factor a person's cruelty into her calculations #because in her head all she needs to dismiss that calculation is 'excessive cruelty here would waste time which is illogical' #she assumes everyone is as smart and to-the-point as she is so when they ARENT and will actively waste time just to do dumb shit #it catches her off guard and she DOESNT PLAN FOR IT so it can really fuck them over sometimes #so this is one instance where zuko has azula beat despite it being STRATEGY aka azula's strong point #bc zuko's immense cynicism and assumption that Everyone Is Awful doesn't hold up against logic 9 times out of 10 #but the one time it does is the time azula gets caught out #i just think tams zuko and azula's dynamic is so fucking interesting im so clever for that tbh #twice as many stars

[imabiscuitinthousandworlds]

I LOVE going everywhere by bike. Don't need to wait for a bus. Don't need to cram myself into a bus with (urgh) people. Or even worse, what feels like every single student in town. I still get home in about the same amount of time. I'm so so flexible including with places. Like yeah sure, let's go there! I don't care if the next bus station is far away. Doesn't matter to me.

Stayed out late with friends recently. Two of em had to get their family to come pick them up because that's too far to walk and it was too late for buses. A different friend lives like 30 minutes away but always walks and their way goes through a small park where literally no one is at with few lanterns so it's pitch black and I could literally just walk them home and then take the bike which is faster and has its own light and feels and probably is safer than walking those dark ass streets at night alone.

Like. I can just do all that. And yeah, sometimes when I'm not doing too well I feel like collapsing afterwards and yeah, maybe my fingers feel like falling off a lot at this time of year but that's like. SO worth it. I have no idea how people can live and NOT go everywhere by bike. Like if it's more than 20-30 minutes maybe but even with hills.... I fucking love my bike.

#a biscuit's rambles #also i just love going out with friends til late?? #with the lockdown and shit that is such an entirely new experience and its great #also i like feeling useful i think. i like walking a friend home knowing ill definitely get home safe #idk #i also like my bike. a lot #been taking it literally every single day for years now and i have no regrets #EXCEPT FOR THOSE FUCKING PEDESTRIANS THAT HEAR MY BELL AND DO NOT FUCKING MOVE #AND THE OTHER BIKES THAT JUST DONT RING THEIR BELLS OR NOT EVEN HAVE ANY #LIKE THEN YOU GOTTA AT LEAST YELL AT PEOPLE TO MOVE OVER YOU NUMBNUT #A BIKE IS QUIET THEY DO NOT HEAR YOU THEY WILL NOT MOVE OVER MAGICALLY #AND IM STUCK BEHIND YOU #ALSO ITS JUST ASSHOLE BEHAVIOUR LIKE SOMEITMES WARNING SOMEONE SO THEY KEEP TO THE BLOODY SIDE IS GOOD!!! #and dont even get me STARTED ON SOME OF THE CARS #MUCH LESS THE STUPID ASS FUCKING INFRASTRUCTURE OF MY TOWN #ITS LIKE THEY WANT BIKES TO BE RUN OVER #fun fact i have been run over before #just fuckin collided with a car #nobody would listen to me try to pick apart the details of how it felt #which was probably my way of trying to cope with that experience lol #though nothing serious happened. bUT STILL #also oh god that one stupid fucking street with those stupid ass cars NOBODY NEEDS A CAR THERE JUST BAND HTEM ALREADY #AND THE. THE FUCKIGN ROADWORKS #I CAN NOT REACH MY SCHOOL WITHOUT ALMOST BEING EITHER HIT IN THE HEAD WITH A HUGE SHOVEL OR RUN OVER BY A TRUCK #AND IF THATS NOT THE CASE THEN THERES SO MANY FCKING PEOPLE THAT EVEN IF I YELL AT THEM LIKE MAD I CANT GET PAST WITHOUT RUNNING SOMEONE #THROUGH MYSELF #im very passionate about all things bike. but thinking abt it is a huge part of my life so im allowed to be

[lobotomyladylives]

literally wanna dieeeee I realized belatedly that not only was down bad written for me due to being an alien abduction metaphor song but it perfectly describes my situation w/my ex who dumped me 3 days into our second vacation in his country

#but yknow thats what i get for dating a fucking man last year when i absolutely knew better. i was in a low place & the idea of being #whisked away from europe was an escape for me . we got along really well but the second i showed any emotional weakness he couldnt handle i #oh but he sent a bunch of messages begging me to come back when i was on the plane fleeing to my sisters london flat! lol!!! #i didnt tell you guys about any of this on my old blog when it was happening bc i just knew itd invite a flood of #''why were you even dating a man'' messages. yeah im aware. it was stupid & yet another result of my inability to purge myself of the #desire to be in a relationship my homophobic father wouldnt hate me for. and i didnt think any woman would want me . im over it now #fuck my abusive father fuck men in general im so over the internalized homophobia. ive always preferred women why should i have to #supress that to make my fuckface hypocrite father happy. i only rly care bc i love my half brother & want to be in his life which means #i have to appease dad. but at what goddamn cost #why did i say from europe in that earlier tag. i meant TO europe...im from the us #anyways. what a shit show situation that was. i have never felt so betrayed by anyone except for my dad himself #oh i didnt even mention the worst part yet. when i texted from london asking if our friendship was over too (god. so cringe) he then went #into this spiel about how actually what he said earlier when he was asking me to come back #(that it had been a stupid impulse & biggest mistake of his life) was a lie & it had been a long time coming #IF IT WAS A LONG TIME COMING WHY THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME FLY ACROSS THR ATLANTIC FUCKING OCEAN 3 DAYS AGO FOR YOU #and said hed tell me the reasons but ''didnt want to hurt me'' #i have so much hatred in my heart for this man to this day when i really think about the mind games he was playing. unreal. #and he KNEW i already had massive trust issues

[dykeinthedark]

venting in tags about gender n shit (long as hell) (u can comment and talk 2 me as always :3)

#okay so i got a really masc haircut about a month ago and i know it's just a haircut but holy shit has it changed EVERYTHING for me #like.... i've always leaned masc except 1) before i came out 2) when i was actively in love with someone who i knew liked femmes #and they always described me as a fem. because that's what i showed her. because i wanted to be with her. #but lowkey whenever i'm in a not-impressing-anyone raw-dogging-life-no-crush era i always resort to a very masc style #like masc being my default and i'd only lean fem to impress people whether it's for love or peer pressure in a specific setting #like ''dressing up'' has always been a form of drag to me. like something i HAD to do to fit in or impress my parents (scott favor core) #but ever since this haircut i've realized... i could just BE masc innately like i really don't have to be womanly if i don't want to #which i usually don't. again i have only ever dressed fem for other people. but it's not even being masc that attracts me on its own #it's like. being masc in a distinctly lesbian way. as in whenever i look in the mirror i don't wanna be like a Guy i wanna be a dyke. #like lesbian as a gender identity too sort of thing honestly. okay i've been waffling but basically i sort of want to call myself butch #but i don't know if i like... can?? if i'm allowed to??? #everyone always says it's MORE than just wearing boy clothes and not wearing makeup and having short hair (which i already do all those) #i mean i've always id'd as genderqueer because it literally just means gender weird and i experience gender in a queer way #what's probably the most telling is that my friends (all queer) CALL me a butch lesbian #like every time they do i feel really internally validated. it's not just my clothes but my personality too ig is what people tell me #i have a higher pitched voice relatively speaking but apparently the way i talk is quote ''very clockably into women'' #which?? gender euphoria asf. my best friend specifically he (gay trans guy) always uses butch to describe me very intuitively #people have also noticed that i ''transitioned'' in all aspects except hormonally. like ppl have commented and noticed my masculinzation #but at the same time i always feel rly haunted by my ex relationships because one wanted me to be more masc #(she's the one who came out as straight and would treat me like a man) which i didn't like and i didn't like playing up being fem either #bc now it feels like she (butch) won't believe me if i called myself butch too bc she remembers me being femme #idk i feel like there's her voice in my head all the time that sees everything i do through her eyes (i'm lowkey still in love) #i feel like even though this comes so naturally to me i must be putting on a performance #even though i've actually read stone butch blues and done research into the history and i truly love and id with the culture like i rly do #that im still just a sad imitation of a butch lesbian and can never really be a part of it because i used to enjoy dressing up sometimes #like it's so stupid but can i still be butch if i wore a dress to prom and i think i looked good in it?? #even though i was envious of my friends who wore suits?? that i used to try goth makeup?? that i liked long dresses?? #that i enjoyed stacked necklaces and rings on every finger??? #and tbh ALL OF THAT CAME FROM A CONCIOUS EFFORT TO FEMINIZE MYSELF IN JUNIOR YEAR OF HIGHSCHOOL WHEN I WAS 16 #because omfg it was 2 months before junior prom and i was worried that i was too masc and wanted to get comfortable with being fem

[toytulini]

god I know this is like The Wrong Stance on AI. I know its not about whether the art is Real and Human or If It Has A Soul and how a lot of the arguments against it are the same bullshit arguments people made against digital art like I Know. I Knowwww. but god, I'm really sorry, not to post like one of those annoying poetry bloggers I cant stand (yall are valid, live your truth, theres nothing wrong with what you post I'm just a petty bitch who hates poetry. unless I dont hate it.)

But theres just something about the way AI art will almost certainly never be able to mimic the exact way my pencil leaves an indentation in the paper, the way some of the lines I can never fully erase cause I pressed too hard, theyll have to at least train them to draw with a physical pencil first, and sure, they could train it to draw with a pencil and even erase the exact same piece I drew, line for line, on a piece of paper with a robot arm powered by AI, but they can't replicate. idk. the lineage of lefty bitches in my family, and the way I grew up going through school with my entire left arm silver with graphite, from doodling on my schoolwork. not yet anyway. but I guess I do live for the day we make the ai sentient enough that we can traumatize it by giving it homework after kneecapping its executive functions so it copes by drawing a big tiddy lobster monster. sure

#toy txt post #reblogs OFF i dont trust yall to be normal with this one i do NOT want it getting notes #i posted part of this before in a chat to a friend but im feeling it again. so #i havent drawn my big tiddy lobster bitch in awhile i should draw her again #also yea SORRY im sure this is The Wrong Feeling To Have About AI but also sometimes im a little grateful that i dont think my style is #smth a lot of the ppl coding ai to make art find to be worth trying to replicate except maybe as like a fake progress shot on a piece #which is smth i used to be really insecure about. how unfinished all my art looks bc it isnt to the point i cant fucking watch #like speedpaints and shit bc i just start feeling stupidly insecure about all the points in the video where I Would Have Stopped and been #like. im not touching it anymore i dont want to ruin it #and ive been insecure about my inability to really do digital art with like a stylus and shit like the way i do it with a pencil #and i know that is just me needing to Practice it but being too frustrated by it #anyway i know its just a Tool and its Fine and the problem is the art theft and the labor problems of it but liiiiiiike #i just. #im sure there will be unique things and usages of ai as a tool and i genuinely hope that ppl can figure out a way to make one that isnr #isnt* just full of stolen content bc theres unique fuckin shit about like digital art programs u can write stupid poetry that you hate #about it. or stupid poetry that i hate. cos im the poetry hater. listen. i cant stress this enough: its fine. youre fine. keep posting your #poetry and reblogging shit that speaks to you. im just a Bitch okay Ignore Me #i should go draw bokrae like. eating a computer about this #the real reason for that graphics card shortage was bokrae ate them all when she was in the mood for a crunchy snack

[marklikely]

people r having an absolute fit over the frankie refresh having pink in it and i feel like im going insane. do these dolls not have more or less the exact same amount of pink in them.

#this complaint is literally so stupid it is the same. wrt pink. #the hair has pink now sure but its been totally removed from the skirt/shorts and toned down from the shoes. who give a shit #also you guys should be jumping for joy that we finally lost the absolutely hideous pink lipstick that looked bad w their blue skin. #avpost #anyway if you care abt my opinion i think all the refreshes are either a lateral move or a huge improvement. except cleo hers is bad #im excited to see lagoona in person bc it looks like theyre changing her pink skin tone and also i love the giant pants they gave her lol #i didnt like pink lagoona but i wasnt opposed to it in theory. my issue is that the specific shade they used is so ugly & clashy #the new one looks sooo good in pictures but i cant tell if itll look equally bad in person as the last one did #idk i like most of the changes except cleo she looks terrible. imo. #also for this doll specifically im annoyed that they're losing the belt with their own name on it! smh

[robobee]

i hope you know in the bad ending (greywaren canon) Henry's inevitable arranged failmarriages lead to a string of explosive divorces but seondeok KEEPS getting him hitched to girls named Catherine literally just to fuck with him

#its like the Ashleys except really funny for everyone except gansey #who is still personally seething over choosing to break up with henry (he thinks being named Richard should make him the 5th arranged ma- #dont reblog this this is just stupid shit im saying cus i saw a henry the 8th tiktok by that british girl #and she mentioned richard the 4th or whatever and i have autism WORMS in my BRAIN #trcposting #edit WAIT DIDNT HE HAVE A JANE TOO... BLUE COMES IN WITH THE STEEL CHAIRRRRR #her and henry also get divorced but they like each other more after #edit 2: 'oughhh youre giving too much credit to seo' she literally named herself after a queen and her son after a king. wake up #shes a nerd loser

[nerosdayinanime]

"Im worried what people would think of you then, that you're just a personal whore or something- i don't want to ruin your reputation.."

"Are you kidding? 'My dick was so good i got promoted-' Thats the biggest flex i can think of!"

"Well, you're certaintly enthusiastic about this."

#ive been thinking of the au from @planethoneybee's tags in that writing prompts post #on the topic of giyuu wanting sabito to have political power in case something happens or someone tries to pull shit- #him & shinobu debating the pros and cons of giving him title of concubine before giyuu brings up the social aspect #so shino calls sab in to get his thoughts on the matter directly and it made me laugh #another bit w sanemi- theyre at a meeting talking abt finances and theyre talking of cutting sanemi's beetle funding- #G: i can pay for it /Sane: what? /G: keep as much funding to the project as possible- i'll finance the rest of it out of my #own allowance. that works doesnt it? /Shino: i suppose. ..but you'd do that for beetles? /G: i see importance in it. /Shino: very well- #sanemi doesnt thank him or even mention it but he definitly looks at giyuu differently after that- he used his own shit to keep #the project going full blast? damn. he did that for sanemi's beetles. man. #somethn somethn giyuu bringing up the idea for shinobu to have a personal guard(/helper) as well #shinobu 'i know what you are' @ giyuu before he hurriedly explains he doesnt mean get a side hoe hes genuinely just #offering to find her a trusted guard/helper whos sole purpose is to do errands n shit specifically for her 'oh! that sounds nice actually' #'sab has someone in mind for you- says shes one of the best in the forces and a pleasant personality' 'ill see that for myself first' #'okay [thumbs up]' #im imaginging a mix between european kingdoms & east asian/chinese/japanese empires except i dont know shit about either #only thing i vaguely know is theres advisors & like sub-royalty & in traditional japanese more (/complex) layers of clothing = rich/royal #the 'sub royalty' has a name im p sure. i forgor. fuckiinnn. #nope its just not there. oh well. giyuu w the fingerless sleeve-gloves my FUCKING beloved #also vague thought of sabito & mitsuri wearing helmets that utilize their pink hair as fuckin. yk the european knights #w the stupid ponytail thing/romans w the gold helm/red mohawk thing. somethn like that #they wouldnt wear like full Heavy Armor like knights do their fighting styles & w the close-quarters they wouldnt need it #but like for Show at Fancy Pantsy Time theyd dress up similarly #loserboy giyuu posting #loverboy sabito posting #sabigiyuu #of all the shit i have for this au THATS the scene that gets front page. dick joke funniee #(in case its not clear text goes Giyuu-Sabito-Shinobu talking)

[puppyeared]

uhh. uhhhhh

#realistically i knw that if i went thru with making animatics for all of these songs I think my hand would fall off BUT. i have brainrot #half of these songs are either here bc of the vibe or because i listened to the lyrics and read analyses and put 2 much effort than i had t #ALSO LISTEN. LISTEN BODYBAG IS EXACTLY EVERYTHING I IMAGINE WHENEVER I THINK OF WUKONG AND MACAQUES RELATIONSHIP OK #two birds and baby hotline is also kind of self explanatory. although most of the jack stauber songs are mostly for vibe #bitter water is a very specific flavor of pining / unhealthy outlook. kind of has like an insatiable vibe to it but idk how to name it #i want soap to be a healing song but maybe im just being optimistic. im here for the vibes although i feel like if swk and macaque were #actually to make up i think they would go into it kicking and screaming. and im frustrated because i cant find a song to match that #except maybe bodybag which AGAIN. THEY ARE SO FUCKING STUPID THATS HOW THEYRE GONNA HEALL FLYING BARK PLS #what if it doesnt end well also feels like a doomed narrative to me. like if you think about it from how their relationship might have st #started (and im probably taking from how everyone romanticizes their relationship as something really innocent or sweet at the start which #i am also not immune to that). but knowing them it is also a very good possibility thats not the case at all. what it is i dont know #primadonna also strikes me as a swk song but like msotly because he serves cunt. on that note I like to imagine rose colored boy as swk to #MK.BECAUSEEE i love how MK brings out the best in people AND AND AND!! 5000 year old immortal who has seen some shit come on people 'and i #have taken my glasses off' COME ON LOOK ATIT. you could also argue that could be macaque to MK and it would make sense #Spotify #Lego Monkie kid #lmk #yapping #playlist #monkie kid