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sunghoonbite · 3 months

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pairings: heeseung/jay/jake x reader

warnings/content: nsfw, first time sex, valentine’s day! mutual pining, foreplay, i kinda edged u all on this one i’m sorry if u need a part 2 i understand

minors dni, before reading

hi happy valentine’s day!! it’s just these 3 bc i didn’t have the time to write for sunoo tonight, but i totally can add him at some point if you guys want it. hope u enjoy :o

you wore lace lingerie to heeseung’s dorm to tease him, his t-shirt that he gave you some weeks ago thrown overtop of it, your legs hidden by comfy sweatpants.

you had gone out earlier today for valentine’s day, to the mall and out to eat. but you wanted more than that. you called him up and let him know you’d be over to spend the night, and of course he immediately accepted your invitation.

heeseung wanted more too. when you drove to the restaurant, your sephora bags from the mall sitting on the floor of his car, you sat in the passenger seat, silently looking out the window. he’d look over at you once he got to a stoplight, and his eyes trailed down to your thighs every time. the weather was nice and you wore a skirt for him.

silently, he cursed himself. why did he want to touch you so badly? you sat innocently next to him, legs crossed, but the only thought on his mind was the sounds you’d make as you made a mess over his car. would you whine his name? grab his hand as he fucked your cunt?

when you got to his dorm, he looked you up and down, infatuated, although you were dressed messily in his shirt. you leaned in once inside and your lips met.

“take my top off,” you whispered against his mouth, and his hands trailed up your back. you felt his lips curl upwards.

he obliged, shirt falling to his carpeted floor, and he blinked at the lace bralette that just barely covered your chest up.

“can you fuck me, heeseung?”

once your words spilled out of your mouth, he had you pressed into his bed within seconds.

jay took you out to eat on valentine’s day. you had spent the night before, not unusual for the two of you, and while drifting off to sleep you mumbled some barely coherent words about what restaurant you wanted to be taken to. so, gladly, he surprised you the next evening. “surprise” being a loose term, since he quite literally will do whatever you ask. taking you out to eat is a minuscule task.

you got ready in his bathroom, and stepped out in a silk, short black dress. his eyes wandered instantly, your curves evident as the fabric hugged your body, but he looked away after getting a good glance. jay was typically short with his compliments, not at all meaning that he disliked your appearance whatsoever, but he felt almost intimidated by your beauty, and feared if he spoke too much about what you looked like or wore that it would become uncomfortable.

so, he uttered softly, “you look good.”

when you got to the restaurant, though, he wasn’t able to look away, despite his efforts. you were seated across from him, and you were both yet to order. your eyes scanned the menu, unaware of his scanning your body, and you pressed your lips together as you thought about what to order. you looked up at him, ready to ask his opinion, and he was already staring at you.

“is something wrong?” you questioned.

“you look amazing,” he stated your name after his sentence.

you beamed, face beginning to flush, and you looked up as you brushed his comment off.

“thank you!” you smiled, fully aware jay’s words are always genuine.

he spoke your name again, pausing afterwards. you looked at him.

“how about we go in the car?” his voice was low.

you waited a moment, trying to understand his request, but tilted your head slightly once he didn’t elaborate.

“why? what’s wrong?”

quietly, he leaned in and replied, “i want to fuck you in the parking lot.”

his words were unusually bold for him. your mouth opened as you looked around, searching for if someone heard him.

“would that be okay?” he asked, before you had the possibility to answer, “it’s okay if you want to wait for another time.”

you took your purse that rested on the table, and began to sit up out of your chair.

“i want to,” you said quietly, “fuck me in the parking lot.”

so he did.

you and jake stayed in for the holiday. you both planned this ahead, so he surprised you. he bought you chocolates and flowers, and placed them in gift box of your favorite things. you spent the day together, captivated with one another’s presence.

now, though, it was getting late, and you sat together on his couch. you started the third movie of the night, snacks from earlier scattered over the table in front of you. his arm was around your waist, and your head rested on his shoulder to accompany your body that was curled up on his side. you were close, so close.

for some reason, your body started to heat up. his touch against you was nice, but you wanted more from him. you wanted jake on your skin. you wanted him to touch you more. lower. deeper.

you shifted, hoping to release some tension as you tried to inch closer to him. it wasn’t possible, you were already nearly connected to him, your clothes the only thing separating you. it was agonizing, you wanted to feel him.

you lifted your head up to get a better look at his face that was fixated on the screen. when he felt the warmth leave his shoulder, he turned to you. you kissed him once he did, his mouth meeting yours.

once the kiss broke, you moved closer, sitting on his lap now, straddling his thigh.

“what’re you doing baby?” he asked, mouth curled up into what you made out to be a sheepish grin.

you leaned in to kiss his neck.

“i need you,” you mumbled against his skin.

his hands wandered down and held onto your waist firmly.

“yeah? need me how?”

you lifted your head up once again and a sigh escaped your lips, you turned your head to the side.

“jake, i want you to fuck me,” you said, cursing yourself mentally for letting yourself say it so boldly, so desperately.

“all of a sudden?” he asked, but not complaining, completing his sentence with a small laugh.

“it’s okay if you don’t want to,” you added.

“no, no,” he replied, “i want to.”

as he said that, he lifted your top above your head to start undressing you. he pressed his palms against your waist and laid you down on the couch gently.

“fuck,” he muttered under his breath at the sight of you, “you’re gonna look so pretty on my dick.”

you did, if you could call your mascara running pretty.

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grandlinedreams · 18 days

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Well, since I have fallen for your writing pretty hard (it's a blessing really, because so far only your reader can be read as a he when it comes to the Fallout series fandom), my brain's been spewing ideas at me.

I'd love to see a genuinely jealous Cooper. Awfully and painfully jealous, where he's actually hurting and doubting himself, but is also angry. Not the kind of playful jealousy he felt towards Lucy, no. Something deeper. And angry at the slimy guy who's already stepped over any kind of boundaries when he's laid his eyes on what's his. But they need the information, they can't go forward without it, so the plan is for the reader (you knooow, that version of the reader from that particular fic of yours, where they are crafting ammo) to get close, flirt with him, go real sweet on him. But that guy's too touchy. Too close, too dangerously close. To getting his brains blown out of his skull by Cooper's gun, that is.

I absolutely love your writing ❤️

OUGH YES I EAT THAT SHIT UP EVERY TIME but also thank-you!! I do my absolute best not to gender reader bc it bugs me to do it unless I'm asked to and it's also just a whole lot more inclusive! 🥺❤️

ㅡ

Warnings: jealous!Cooper, some self deprication, mentions of pre-War Cooper, weapons maker/dealer!reader, touch of angst, Canon typical violence, Lucy just watching all of this like ??, skeezy informant dude do be skeezin', boundaries very overstepped (unwanted touch, lewd words), questionable alcohol,cursing, quick and dirty Makeout sesh at the end lmao

The place is a "bar" in the lowest sense of the term. A gutted out building that was undoubtedly a diner of some kind before the war, now with blown out windows but surprisingly, a neon 'open' sign that halfway works in places, spitting sparks that makes Lucy eye it warily. "Is this place...safe?"

You snort. "If you're lookin' for safe, you should've stayed in that tin-can vault of yours." You adjust the sling of your pack, now far lighter than it'd been when you left with Cooper, Lucy, and Dogmeat. "We need information, and the best informant we've got likes to hang around here."

Lucy still doesn't look happy about it, but she reluctantly follows as you step forward. The inside resembles the outside for the most part, the same kind of dismal grey of the wastelands ㅡ but it's busy.

Battered tables teem with scavengers and raiders alike, and you pretend not to notice them ㅡ your attention is on the man doing a piss-poor job of wiping down what's left of a counter. A radio crackles, a singer croons sweetly, but the pitch is made tinny for the way the man casually smacks the top of it when it stutters. A barely there glance up at you, silent prompt that you follow.

"Three drinks," you say without preamble, shoving a handful of caps forward. Your fingers drum, eyes roaming in feigned disinterest ㅡ and then nod when three short glasses are shoved to you. The liquid is of a questionable color, watered down amber ㅡ you sniff it before you take a sip.

"Tastes like shit," you say when Cooper approaches and you hand him his glass, followed by Lucy, "but it gets the job done."

Lucy eyes the glass. "What is it?"

You down the rest of it. "Poor man's excuse for whiskey, I think. Or might be deathclaw piss, who knows."

Cooper snorts when Lucy's nose wrinkles, but she downs it with a grimace that makes you snicker and pat her back.

"Atta girl, vaultie. Atta girl."

The four of you settle at a table, Dogmeat at your feet as you stretch out, catching Lucy's look. "What?"

"What are we here for?"

"Information, vaultie," Cooper cuts in, "we don't have shit to go on as far as following your dear ol' daddy, so we gotta get some."

"And the best bet is getting it from that sneaky bastard," you let your eyes drift so that Lucy follows, "over there."

The man in question has clearly seen better days ㅡ or what he can see through the thick, wild tangle of silver-streaked hair on his head, the matching mess of beard that spills from his chin to his chest. He's sitting with a handful of scavengers, oblivious to the fact he's being watched.

"Him?" Lucy's tone expresses her doubt. "He doesn't look likeㅡ"

You knock your knuckles on the table to quiet her. "The point of being an informant, Lucy," you say in a low mutter, "is to not look like a fuckin' idiot who's listening in on shit they shouldn't."

"So who's gonna go talk to him?"

You sigh, eyeing the two. Cooper is obviously out of the question ㅡ it's the grace of his hat and the fact his back is to most of them that allows him some anonymity, but you have no doubts near everyone knows who he is. Or at the very least, what he is.

And Lucy... well. She's been out here for weeks now, but there's still a naive shinyness to her that says she'll fuck it up immediately, even if she doesn't mean to.

"Me," you say, and Lucy blinks at the same time Cooper tenses, eyes dark as they study your face. There's a protest on the tip of his tongue, one you silence as you continue, "I'm the best bet we have of getting what we need."

Lucy glances between you and Cooper, sensing the rising tension ㅡ and Dogmeat whines and nudges at your leg. Your eyes lock with Cooper's.

"Fine," he rasps. "Do what you have to."

ㅡ

Cooper is pissed. Lucy can tell that, the way his eyes never leave you as you trek back to the counter, another couple of caps for another drink ㅡ not for you, her, or him. But for that informant, the way you gesture with a casual nod in his direction.

He watches as the drink gets sent, the informant looking up, and his gloved hands tighten in his lap at the grin the other man gives you before he waves you over. He hates the casual way you step, relaxed, friendly ㅡ flirtatious, almost.

Cooper is not stupid. Far from it, he knows better than to outright stake claim on you in a way that can be used against him by others ㅡ but you're a chink in the proverbial armor, a weakness he's both grateful for and wishes he didn't have.

It's unspoken though, that you're his ㅡ and the fact he can't stroll over and make a point of it annoys him. Especially with the way the man's hand drifts over your leg, meaty fingers on a thigh Cooper has touched in a more intimate way, spaces reserved for him and him alone ㅡ seeing this fucker paw at you makes his blood boil.

"Looks like they're doing a good job so far," Lucy says, watching a little less intently than Cooper, "do you thinkㅡ"

"Vaultie." Cooper's voice is low and sharp. "Shut the fuck up."

It's not Lucy's fault, not really ㅡ but Cooper's two seconds from putting a bullet in this guy's head, information be damned. In another life, the life he'd had before, he figures he wouldn't be so irritated. He'd been handsome, hadn't really had to do much to make his stance clear ㅡ but now?

Now he knows what he looks like, how he acts ㅡ and the softer lining of your relationship is still new enough that there's that kernel of doubt. That you'd take someone else if given the chance, someone who could give you far more than he can ㅡ because all he can give you is all he knows.

Death and destruction, picking apart things until there's nothing left. All he knows how to do is take and take and take ㅡ and while you've yet to be bothered by it, he knows it's just a matter of time.

He tracks that hand when it slides up your back, teeth clenched because now you look distinctly uncomfortable. It's hidden, but he knows how to look for it, better at reading you than anyone else ㅡ and it's quickly fraying restraint that keeps him from getting up and coming to your rescue.

You flinch at the next touch, barely there recoil ㅡ but it's enough to snap Cooper's threadbare patience as he stands, ignoring Lucy's look of confusion as he strolls over.

His foosteps are slow, feigned casual as he approaches, settling a hand on your shoulder. Again, casual, were it not for the possessive pressure as he drawls, "Sorry for the interruption, but I need to borrow my friend here."

He's hauling you up before you can protest, and he commends himself on choosing this option rather than the one he so desperately wants ㅡ one that would involve splattering the brains of that fucker across the back wall. Even so, he takes too much pleasure in the intentional hand on said gun when the informant opens his mouth to protest.

He hurries you away from the table, ignores Lucy and Dogmeat as he tugs you past the table and outside, around the corner from prying eyes.

"Cooper," you snap, "what the fuckㅡ"

You're silenced by the aggressive press of his mouth on yours, gloved hand still firm around your upper arm as he cages you against the wall. He dominates the kiss, nips at your lip, deepens it with the muffle of a soft moan from you.

His other hand wanders, up your thigh, side, back ㅡ all the places that piece of shit dared to touch you. "I know I said do what you have to," he mutters when he breaks away to nip at your neck, "but I have my limits, sweetheart. 'specially when some fuckface is touchin' what's mine."

You squirm. "Cooperㅡ"

Dark eyes meet yours. "You are mine, aren't you darlin'?" You nod, and he clicks his tongue. "Words, babydoll. I wanna hear you say it."

It takes a second for you to find your voice. "Yours," you say, "I'm yours, Cooper."

He smirks, leaning in to kiss you again. Less aggressive but no less consuming, only letting up to let you breathe as he presses against you. "Good," he rasps, "better rememher that because I don't intend on losin' you, nor do I like the idea of fuckin' sharing."

#ㅡanswered.#ㅡmine.#fallout x reader #cooper howard x reader #the ghoul x reader

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kazvha · 11 months

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Hi! May I request headcanons of Yoru, Gekko, and Phoenix (separately) trying to confess their romantic feelings to VP agent![Reader] [Gender Neutral], but some situations kept blocking their attempts to do so like last minute missions and other chaotic events that happen at the Valorant Protocol; then towards the end, they finally confess their feelings to them?

Summary: They want to confess to you, but they get interrupted.

Including: Phoenix, Yoru & Gekko.

Notes: Hi and thanks for the request! I'm new to the Valorant fandom and this is also my first time writing for it. I had some trouble bc of that, but I hope it's alright?👉👈 Enjoy!

Phoenix

• He's so down bad for you

• When you joined the Valorant Protocol the two of you instantly clicked, mostly because of his social and welcoming nature

• Since he was way longer in the Protocol, he showed you around and taught you all the different stuff

• It didn't take long until he fell for you after you spent so much time together

• And as impatient as Phoenix is, he wanted to confess his feelings to you as soon as possible

• But every single time, the odds were against him

• For example, one time you were in the common room in the early morning, eating your cereal when Phoenix joined you on the couch

• The room was deserted and you were in a good mood, which made this moment a perfect time to confess.

• This man got so nervous all of a sudden and asked you some random question instead of saying the three words. "Yoo, is the cereal tasting good?"

• You gave him a side glance and hummed because you had the cereal in your mouth

• Phoenix wanted to say more, but Jett walked into the room and started a conversation with you, ruining his opportunity

• He was losing his mind the more time passed

• So eventually, he decided to confess to you in front of your room in the middle of the night

• Before anything could happen he blurted the words out as soon as you opened the door. "I like you. I like you more than a friend."

• Instead of watching your reaction, he looked around as if he was waiting for something to happen.

• When nothing happened, he whispered a silent "Ohh yeah baby, I won this time!", which only made you more confused

• "So what's your answer?" He ran his fingers through his locks and gave you a professional smile

• "Phoenix, please, it's 3 AM. Ask me again in the morning, I'm too tired to think straight." You closed the door on him

• But after thinking about the things Phoenix said for a few minutes, you opened the door to give him a positive answer

• To your surprise he was still standing there

• "I like you too."

Yoru:

• It was how you treated him seriously and genuinely heard him out compared to the others

• When he first realized his feelings for you, he suppressed them. What good would come out of this?

• But he couldn't stop thinking about you. Every little thing reminded him of you. And it didn't help that you often had missions together.

• These bottled-up feelings would hinder his performance to the point he would panic every time on the inside when you faced an enemy

• It couldn't go on like this

• He tried to confess to you on the flight back from a mission. The others were in the front and you were the only two in the back

• "Listen, I-"

• Yoru couldn't say more since Brimstone had another mission for you

• "Mirrors have been sighted in that area. We have to get there quickly. Yoru, [A/n] make yourselves ready."

• A heavy sigh escaped him

• Next time he tried to convey his feelings to you in the range. However, Killjoy and Raze interrupted your moment to test out their new machines and bombs

• Even if they left you two alone again, you wouldn't be able to hear Yoru because of the ringing in your ears😭

• At this rate, Yoru got the feeling that he would never be able to find the right moment. This noticeably soured his mood for a few weeks. The other agents thought he lost a bet or smth

• In the end, he said it in the middle of the battlefield. He was done waiting, and you needed to know. So, before everyone went to their positions, he walked up to you

• "Hey, you're the person I like. So don't die on me now. I need to hear your answer later."

• With burning cheeks, Yoru fastly teleported to his position and left you with a surprised Pikachu face

• You also came clean after the mission. "Hey, I didn't die!", you smiled, "and I have feelings for you too. Possibly more than you can imagine."

Gekko:

• When Gekko joined the Valorant Protocol, he stuck to you and Neon like glue

• In addition to being assigned to various missions together, you three also spent most of your free time together

• When there was nothing to do, you hung out in each other's room, went to a boba place, sparred together, etc.

• You three and Gekko's little buddies, quickly became close friends

• With time, Gekko developed romantic feelings for you. Of course, Neon noticed this fact which resulted in you and Gekko spending more time together because she gave you two some space

• Whenever he was near you, he felt giddy and nervous. Even his little crew became more touchy with you

• He wanted to confess to you when you two were drinking boba in a cafe. He waited till you finished your drink. "[Name], I gotta tell you something big."

• You shifted your attention to him, curious about what he was going to say. But suddenly a man who passed your table spilled his coffee on your shirt

• Let's just say, it got heated between you and this stranger, and Gekko had no moment to confess

• Next time, you were chatting with Neon in the common room, and Gekko wanted to ask you if you could speak in private. However, Phoenix dragged him off, so that Gekko could see his new moves. "Pheonix can't you show me your moves later, I'm reaaaaally busy right now..." He dramatically reached his hand out to you, but you didn't see him

• At this point he lost all hope

• But, Wingman came to his rescue!

• When Gekko's bored, he draws in his sketchbook. This book had tons of sketches of you (with lots of hearts😏). Wingman ripped out a drawing to give it to you

• When Gekko realized this and ran after him, it was already too late. You looked at the paper with surprise in your eyes then you turned around to Mateo, who was a blushing mess

• "Did you draw this?" "Yeah..." He gathered up all of his courage and finally told you his feelings with a nervous grin. "You know, I liked you for a very long time now, haha."

• "I kinda noticed that because I feel the same. Let's go out?"

#valorant x reader #valorant x you #valorant x y/n #valorant headcanons #valorant fluff #phoenix x reader #phoenix x you #phoenix x y/n #yoru x reader #yoru x you #yoru x y/n #gekko x reader #gekko x you #gekko x y/n #valorant x poc!reader #valorant x black!reader

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arctrooper69 · 1 year

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Born for This

This is my gift for @starborncyare-deactivated202303 as a part of the @cloneficgiftexchange (which you should go and check out bc there are a TON of amazing fic authors).

Prompt: "Cyar'ika no." // "But it followed me back to camp!"

P.S. Sorry for posting so late tonight. I meant to post it earlier but life got in the way. Hope you like it though!

Holy crap I tagged the wrong person 😱😱😱 I'm so sorry!

Warnings: None?

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"Where in the kriffing galaxy have you be -" Kix stuttered, cutting himself off as you walked through the door holding what looked like a large bundle of towels. Whatever you were carrying barely fit in your arms. "Uh...what is that?"

Before you could respond, the bundle began to wiggle and two long angular ears popped out of the top.

Kix's look of concern flipped to one of disbelief in a matter of nanoseconds.

Oh Force, not again.

Jesse and Hardcase had brought him an injured tooka the week before and it had wrecked havoc in his med bay when it got loose. Kix desperately hoped this wouldn't be a repeat of that disaster.

Though, despite his initial worries, he had to smile. You did look awfully cute sporting that wide grin of yours. He loved how the tip of your nose crinkled when you were truly happy.

Kix took a step forward, curiously peering at the creature cocooned in your arms.

Oh. Kriff.

He almost wished it was a feral tooka.

He slid his hand down his face and took a deep breath as he stepped back. "Cyar'ika," he said evenly, keeping his voice as calm as he could muster. "Please tell me that isn't what I think it is."

You looked down as the creature in question poked his head out from beneath the towel, large yellow eyes curiously gazing around the room.

"This little guy?" You cooed at the large cub. He barely fit in your arms.

"Little!?" Kix almost yelled, shooting you an incredulous look. "That thing is a gundark and could very easily tear you apart!"

As if on cue, the cub let out a purring growl before yawning, displaying rows of razor sharp teeth.

You frowned. "His name is Tiny and I don't think he likes what you just said about him."

Kix pinched the bridge of his nose, not quite believing the scene before him.

"You named it!?"

You nodded enthusiastically.

"And....what made you decide to bring it here?"

The gundark whined, knocking his head against your shoulder, blinking up at you.

"He was wandering around just outside the base. I think there's something wrong with his paw. He was limping and I thought you could help him!"

"It is a gundark, cyar'ika. Please get it out of my med bay before it eats someone."

Your expression fell. "But he's hurt! He doesn't have a mom anymore! We have to keep him!"

"No. Absolutely not. Go outside. Put it down immediately and go wash your hands."

"But he followed me back to camp! I think he thinks I'm his mom now. Please at least just help me patch him up!"

Kix sighed. Part of him wanted to yell at you, tell you that the cub was dangerous, that it could seriously hurt you. Kix had seen brothers be torn to pieces by these creatures. He could still hear their screams as they were eaten alive. He wanted that danger as far away from you as possible.

On the other hand, the amount of compassion you displayed towards this injured animal was the same kindness he'd seen you show daily as you helped nurse his wounded brothers back to health. You were born for this - he saw it everyday. Watching you be so gentle towards such a bloodthirsty creature stirred something inside of him. You were strong, he knew that, and as much as he tried to keep you out of trouble, danger just followed along behind, but you faced it head on with such a genuine, loving thoughtfulness. It was part of who you were.

Maybe it was time to act on those feelings that had been growing stronger day by day.

Kix chuckled softly as his hand grazed your shoulder. He smiled warmly, latching onto that growing sparkle of dedicated excitement in your eyes.

"Alright, cyar'ika. Let's see what we're working with."

--------------------------------------------------

@zoeykallus @ttzamara @nahoney22 @merkitty49 @viva-la-whump @agenteliix @dumpsters-little-matchbook @nekotaetae @ladykatakuri @loverofclones @heyitsaloy @padawancat97 @jambolska-grozdova @flyingkangaroo @melymigo @rain-on-kamino @jiabeewrites @my-own-oracle @dragonrider9905 @queenofspades6 @ordinarylokix @jupitersaturnapollo @queencousland101 @vampirerouge @southernbaguette @staycalmandhugaclone @dalu-grantkylo @dangraccoon @aconstructofamind @blueink-bluesoul @sol-oya-6116

If you want to be on my taglist, feel free to send me a message! Also, asks are open! Reblogging is very much encouraged and it makes me do a happy dance every time any of my writing gets reblogged 😂❤️

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flowercrowngods · 1 month

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the ever lovely @cuoredimuschio tagged me in six sentence sunday

and i’m half passed out in bed already but i gotta do what i gotta do 🤍 some time travel au words with double/triple sentence count bc lord have i been tagged a lot in those lately 🫶

Owens wants to talk with him — well, as much as the scientist leader of a secret government project that makes political super weapons of unborn children can ever just want to talk with someone like Steve. It makes him shudder every time Hopper mentions it in an off-sentence, just a side note over the sizzling food on the stove, just an afterthought when he grabs a beer for himself and a coke for Steve.

And every time, Steve freezes with the ice cold rush of panic, his jaw clenching shut and the nausea he’s been fighting all day crashing on him tenfold.

Steve knows what they do to helpless children and their mothers; he knows what they do to people who ask just the wrong question, or who know just a bit too much. He doesn’t even want to imagine what they’d do with him if they find out what he knows. If they get it in their heads that he knows everything; if they make him out to be someone who’s a lot more than a scared, confused teenager who got wrapped up in some bullshit that’s so much bigger than him.

Owens wants to talk with him. It didn’t go so well last time — images of broken skulls and bodies ripped limb to limb come back to him, swirling in nausea and feverish fear that leaves him immovable and deaf to the world at least once a day.

“Told him I’d put a bullet through his head if he tries,” Hopper adds that night, and Steve, still frozen and suddenly feverish, lifts his eyes away from the nothingness to look at him. Hopper is looking at him, too — because they do that now — and there’s something in those eyes. A surprising genuineness. Fierce. Familiar.

And suddenly it’s like the walls are extending around him, the ceiling ascending as the world outgrows him and leaves him tiny and pathetic and with one more reminder that he doesn’t belong here. Now. It’s pathetic, how much relief it brings to hear Hopper utter such a direct threat, announcing he would kill someone for Steve like he’s talking about the weather.

It’s twisted, the feeling of security so wrong in its nature, and yet so pure. It battles all the other things he’s feeling; all of them leaving him without the energy to speak.

So he remains still, tempests of emotions and thoughts and memories warring inside him, and all he can do is hope that Hopper understands his silence for now.

Please don’t kill anyone for me, he wants to say, but also Yes, please and Thank you.

With a grunt and a nod, Hopper turns back to his food, and Steve envies him for his ability to move right now; for the ability to eat anything at all. He envies him for not knowing.

But he takes that envy and shoves it into the tempest, feeling only tendrils of it lingering in his mind, and adding to the mess of things he carries inside his chest.

It will burst one day, he knows. It already feels too tight to breathe.

#i almost fell asleep twice while writing this so pardon me pls 🤍 but also thank you so much for tagging me in this #maybe i’ll tag people in the morning when i can remember names again #time travel au #tine travel steve #six sentence sunday #except it’s way more than six #steve harrington #oh shit wait i didn’t realise How Much that was hdhdh oh well it’s just with this story i can never really stop :(

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sebsxphia · 6 months

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hi babe! i read your finn masterlist earlier and i just wanna say thank you for giving him some love bc honestly, he’s underrated (i mean that dancing gif? ugh)

now it’s got me thinking what kind of kinks do we think our favourite first baseman would have, any tho(ugh)ts? 🤤

hi hi hi babe! eeeeeek omg! it’s my absolute pleasure! i adore that cowboy lookin’, mustache, slightly cocky, incredibly genuine baseball player, with my whole, entire, heart!

i’m so pleased to hear you enjoyed reading my masterlist for him too and i hope you continue to enjoy all thots and thoughts relating to him! 💗

but YES. omg. this question is so good and it’s long overdue!

cream pie / facials / anything to do with cum. my guy loves to cover you in cum and stuff you full until it’s dripping out of you if he can. he’s taken so many polaroids.

inanimate objects. his baseball bat going inside you is not off the table.

thigh riding (plus riding inanimate objects). he’s got big muscular thighs and if he’s wearing his baseball uniform, or you ride his bat? bonus!

slight cnc. he loves waking you up with his tongue or hands.

torn between overstimulation and denial. he likes both. he loves eating you out for hours and making you come over and over, but alternatively he loves teasing you until you’re a teary, blabbering mess and begging for finn.

crying kink. as mentioned above!

hair pulling. he loves pulling your hair, but more importantly, he loves it when you, tug his hair. making out, eating you out, fucking, etc.

tee hee 🤭 let me know what you think my love and thank you so much for this! 💌

#💌you’ve got mail #seresinsbrat #💐 these are for you!!#walt finn finnegan #sebs masterlist

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ovaruling · 9 months

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hey girl! happy to—the buccal fat removal was pretty simple compared to the other surgeries, but it was still very painful. as i understand it, the surgeon made incisions on the inside of both of my cheeks, and entered that way, and sucked out the “buccal fat yolk,” as he called it. he explained to me that there’s a pouch of fat there that is yolk-like, and does not usually disappear, even with dramatic weight loss, except in cases of extreme malnutrition where there is no reserve left. that’s how he put it, anyway.

so, he essentially stabbed inside my cheeks through up where the “cheek fat” was, just under my cheekbones, and sucked the fat through those incisions and stitched them from the inside. it was, as i said, extremely painful, and eating and drinking was very difficult for a long time. the scars are inside my cheeks and i can still feel them if i run my tongue over them.

the entire cheek area on both sides, inside and out, is mostly numb. sort of like… when Novocain has started to wear off at the dentist.

but i get sudden, electrifying wallops of pain where the buccal fat used to be at completely random times. i get at least one or two a day. it is pretty agonizing, ngl. it feels like instantaneous nerve pain, if you’ve ever had a dentist nick a nerve on a sensitive tooth. it runs through the cheek into my sinuses and down into my gums and it takes my breath away. when these episodes first started happening i genuinely thought i was having a stroke.

i get a lot of migraines now (brow and temple) and my jaw sits really uncomfortably—i’m always having to bite my inner cheeks or suck my cheeks in manually, or else they become fatigued.

a good experiment is—try to hold your mouth open as long as you can. just—open like a crocodile. as wide as you can go, until your cheeks reach the utmost point of fatigue. that’s what it feels like all the time if i try to relax my face—unless i am constantly drawing in my cheeks or making a “duck face,” my cheeks feel fatigued. i don’t know why—maybe they’re strained without the fat there to support them. collapsing, i guess.

it’s really uncomfortable tbh. i’ve gotten used to it, but it sucks.

and it just looks weird as hell too. all it did was age me and make me look dehydrated and starved.

ykw, i guess it really has affected how i do everything with my mouth and facial expressions. they all had to change in some way to accommodate the new “dimensions.” i wish i could show a before and after pic, bc i had a ton of nice healthy buccal fat and now i just look soooo hollowed out and honestly i look so bad lol. i smile differently, i make all my expressions differently. what feels “natural” is kind of weird—cheeks sucked in manually, or lips sucked into my mouth manually. biting of upper and lower lips into the mouth. just… a constant need to draw the face inward to relieve the cheek fatigue.

which leads me to say that once again there does not seem to be a resting position for my face anymore. it’s a neverending strain on the cheek muscles. maybe that’ll change over time—or maybe i’ll strengthen the cheek muscles with facial yoga, idk. but for now it’s a constant nagging need to keep my cheeks sucked in or my lips drawn into my mouth, like this…

…so that they’re supported in some way from the fatigue. idk, it’s really weird. hate it.

the sudden pains are pretty bad too esp bc i never know when they’ll happen. there’s no trigger, really, but i have noticed that cold or hot drinks/foods mean they’ll happen within the half hour. the worst is when they happen WHILE i’m drinking hot coffee or am mid-chew in food. i’ve almost choked a few times that way, lol. super annoying.

that’s all i can think of for now! hopefully that helps a bit. please feel free to ask any specific questions i didn’t answer!

#save #anti cosmetic surgery

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minjix · 2 years

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burden → Vinnie Hacker x reader

summary: in which your biggest fear becomes a reality

warnings: grab tissues bc this is pretty sad ( ✌︎'ω')✌︎ mentions suicide, angst, swearing and feelings + manhandling and a sprinkle of fluff bc why not

masterlist

You weren’t meant to hear it, but you did and you weren’t surprised. Somehow you expected it. The way he acted around you nowadays were a dead giveaway about his feelings for you; rotting and eating him from the inside. He wasn’t happy with you anymore. He didn’t know when his feelings disappeared, but they just did. And he didn’t care.

“I don’t even want to be their friend when we break up.” It felt like your ears were bleeding. And he just kept on going, his friends egging him on with endless and intruding questions. Question that shouldn’t be asked.

“They’re like a goddamn leech!” His voice were rough and you could picture the vein on his forehead popping up. You stood hidden by the doorway to the kitchen, a hand kept over your mouth to stifle your sobs. Your chest felt like it was caving in from the sheer pressure of your silenced cries.

You wanted to die. You even felt like you would drop dead on the spot. You felt physically sick, nausea building up and your vision turned blurry from the onslaught of tears. The same tears that he wiped from your face in the comfort of your bedroom just last week.

You told him how scared you were to be forgotten by the people who promised you the exact opposite, but still did. His bright and gentle smile was on his lips when he reassured you that he wouldn’t leave, and that he wanted to prove your demons wrong.

Now, he was the devil himself.

You bit your lip, wincing at the burning that followed. Their words kept stabbing you and their laughter served it’s purpose of draining your soul. You loved him. You loved him, and this is how he treats you?

Your hands wouldn’t stop shaking as you reached into your pocket to grab your phone. And with a few presses of your thumb, his name appeared on the screen.

“Yo, where you at?” His voice was muffled, and you forced your arm to move. “Hello?” His voice was clear now, louder than those in the kitchen.

“Y/n, you good?” Your tongue felt heavy with lead, you couldn’t talk. The only tell sign of you was your quick breathing, something that didn’t settle Vinnie’s worry.

“Seriously, you’re worrying me now,” still nothing. “I’m on my way.” And with that he was gone.

You felt shame fill you entire being at the thought of Vinnie seeing you like this. You were about to move from your position when a voice interrupted you.

“How will you break up with them? Through text or face to face?” They were laughing through the question. Silenced followed, and you wanted to punch the wall when you realized that he genuinely had to think it through.

“You know what?” He chuckled, a sound that used to bring so much comfort. “I’m calling them, right fucking now, how about that?”

He made it sound like there wasn’t an actual human being involved, and god did it hurt.

The loud ringing from your phone snapped you out of your trance. The laughter in the kitchen had stopped. “Y/n?” His voice was timid now.

When you heard the legs of the chair glide on the floor, was the moment you took off. You ran out of the house, his footsteps and frantic voice following closely behind.

You were pulled backwards as you reached the sidewalk, a yelp escaping you.

“It was a joke, okay?” You turned around to look at him. His eyes were wide with fear.

“Like you weren’t about to call me just to break up this relationship!” You forced your arm out of his grip.

“You know what? Take your jokes, ask your friends to shove them up your ass and leave me alone cause we are done.”

“Y/n? What’s going on?” You didn’t want to feel relieved when his voice reached your ears. You were done with needing someone else to save you.

God, you hated yourself.

He stood beside you now, eyeing up you now ex-boyfriend. He knew something was up, and he was pretty fucking mad when he saw your tear stricken face.

“Back off, Hacker.” Vinnie snorted and took a step forward whilst simultaneously pulling you to stand behind him. “Fuck off.”

You grabbed Vinnie’s hand and pulled him backwards towards his car. “Please, it’s not worth it.” You voice cracked as you continued to shuffle backwards.

Vinnie knew when to back off, especially when he saw his friends gathering by the front door, ready to step in. Vinnie wasn’t about to risk anything, especially when you were there.

꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦ ꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷

You were both seated on his couch. Your hand in his while you told him what happened. You were both at a loss, not knowing what to say for a minute or two until the dark blonde boy adorned with tattoos spoke up. “Always knew he was a dick.” You snorted at that.

“No seriously!” He laughed as he looked at you, “I literally told Nikita that he gave off small dick energy!” You were both laughing now. You leaned your head on his shoulder and took a deep breath, his arm around you as you both stared at nothing, lost in thought. Once again he broke the silence.

“Is it?” Your eyebrows furrowed. “Is what what?”

“His dick, is it small?” You laughed out loud at the question. “What! It’s a legitimate question, why else would he treat you like he did if he wasn’t self conscious?” You stopped laughing at that. You could feel his eyes on you.

“You deserve the absolute world, Y/n, and i’m so fucking sorry that he had to ruin everything.” He sounded close to tears now. “I love you, you know that right?” You knew. You have always known. You looked into his dark eyes and gave a watery smile, your chin shaking as your eyes once again was filled with tears.

“I know, I love you too, but i need time.”

“I’ll wait, I promise.”

And you trusted him, because he’s Vinnie. He was loyal, and he stayed by your side despite breaking his own heart every time he witnessed you and him together.

But you were worth the wait. You will always be worth the wait.

꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦ ꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷

it’s been a while, so hello :) genuinely don’t know what i just wrote but enjoy <3

#vinnie hacker #angsty #imagine #fluff #vinnie imagines #vinnie x reader #vinnie x y/n #vinnie x you #hype house #sad #vinnie hacker angst #vinnie hacker fluff #vinnie fluff #Vinnie angst

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tankgotstuckinthecircusgate · 7 months

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Hi! I saw you rb'd the ask about anything post thingy and I was wondering if you had and thompkean headcanons or anything related to them to share?

(Also when I went to send this ask I realized for the first time you were vssoda I was fully unaware lol)

Thank you so much for this question! I'll start by saying that I'm not sure how much of this can be considered headcanons, it's rather just my thoughts on them oh, and also I still haven't finished Gotham and stopped in the middle of s4 (bc the show is eating up my nerves and I'm healing my mental state to continue watching it😭) and I will note that most likely everything written below is OOC, bc it's hard for me to understand other people's emotions/worldviews/etc, so all my perception of the characters is based on my own experience/feelings Okay let's go (under the cut bc there's a shit tone of text)

1) I think that Lee felt sympathy for Barbara the first time they met at GCPD. You know, that's just that feeling when you like a person at first sight. I mean just look at this (when I turned on this episode now to take screenshots I noticed Lee was swallowing like every 5 seconds. okay girl):

Bonus: Jim Gordon is clearly terrified that his ex is about to steal his new girlfriend:

And I SWEAR because of that I thought this scene in Barbara's apartment would end with them kissing or something

I was SURE they were going to be canon and when Barbara pulled out the knife I just died inside and was incredibly upset in general😭 I feel like if Barbara hadn't attacked Lee then and let go of the thought of Jim they would have started dating eventually one way or another. But naturally, that scene 100% shattered any trust in Barbara (I mean she tried to kill her cmon). I think Lee is a person for whom actions matter a lot and any betrayal/threat is hard to endure, so all the initial sympathy for Barbara was completely shattered

2) It's incredibly hard for me to understand what was going on in Barbara's head in season 2 (but all of season 2 she's clearly in an escalating manic episode and such states are generally hard to understand rationally), but it seems to me that Barbara's obsession with Gordon eventually spilled over into obsession with Lee, Barbara just doesn't realize it

3) Now it seems to me that the most appropriate moment for them to become canon was in season 4 (okay I say that because I'm slowly writing a ThingTM about it), they've both matured morally, been through a lot of shit and the whole Gordon thing is kind of long gone. It's a moment to get a new perspective on each other now anything that has nothing to do with canon:

4) Barbara has clearly been physically attracted to Lee all along. And I think when Barbara realizes that she likes Lee romantically she pulls away. Paradoxically, but starts flirting less, becomes more careful in her actions and words. I think she's scared to actually show romantic sympathy (everything we see in the show is usually physical attraction), bc Barbara has never been accepted as a person (only Tabitha, but there's this complicated story with an incomprehensible love triangle). Barbara's parents didn't love her, Gordon didn't seem to love her much either, Montoya? Honestly, I don't know. I think Barbara's used to pretending and being insincere. And that's the thing that hurt her about Lee: Lee is sincere and not afraid of her emotions. She's honest, open and can show weakness. That's something that Barbara has never allowed herself. And taking the situation of Barbara falling genuinely in love with Lee (I like the idea of Barbara falling in love first) and pulling away, I like to think that Barbara isn't just scared to admit her love (because love = weakness), but also scared to let herself near Lee bc Barbara knows she's a terrible person. It's like touching something clean with dirty hands. And yes, I genuinely love these plot branches when (any kind of) love changes a person for the better, I know it's boring but it's what I want to believe in this life in general

5) It took Lee a lot longer to stop looking at Barbara as a potential danger and unpredictability. She needs time to trust. Again, Lee openly shows her feelings, but that doesn't mean she loves the person, it's just her nature (I think that's exactly what Nygma was getting at. In general, psychopaths often fall in love with people like Lee). But when she felt that Barbara wasn't a threat, she started to notice Barbara as a personality. She fell in love with Barbara's energy (and her humor. I'd like to think of Lee liking Barbara's jokes and every time Lee laughs or smiles Barbara's heart is ready to explode), a healthy version of toughness and sharpness (something Lee lacks, it's hard for her to really resist people), ambition and, despite her generally villainous nature, a desire to do something good (that story about safe space for the women of Gotham)

6) Overall I think they really fell in love with each other as opposites, they have qualities that complement each other and thus both come into balance

7) Their relationship is complicated because it's mentally unhealthy x mentally healthy dynamics. Barbara has an obsessive nature that is hard to get rid of, she has difficulty respecting the other person's personal boundaries, she needs a lot of attention, which her partner can't always give. She has a black and white mindset and any rejection is taken fatally (going into anger or frustration with her partner). But boundaries are a thing she learns in her relationships with Lee and gradually they find compromises. And it seems to me that Lee, despite her generally strong psyche, tends to have an avoidant type of attachment (the fact that she has left town several times as an escape from her problems, but then came back anyway) and at first it was hard for her not to run away from the relationship. Also I think Lee has a problem with rescuing other people, which is also a state she doesn't want to go back to, she doesn't want to save people anymore, giving all of her energy to it. But Barbara doesn't need to be rescued, she can handle her problems on her own, and when Lee realizes that, she becomes calmer. Another problem in their relationship: the fact that Barbara hides her bad mental state to the last, until it all spirals into a severe depression/hysteria/etc. Gradually, Lee creates an atmosphere of comfort and trust without judging Barbara's emotions, so that it becomes easier for the latter to open up, talk about her feelings and not take herself to extremes

8) Both have strong trust issues for different reasons (Barbara is afraid of being abandoned and Lee is afraid of betrayal/violence)

9) They are both self-sufficient mature individuals, but yet they both unknowingly (relatively) give each other a sense of protection and comfort in different aspects of life. Lee learns from Barbara to be tougher with people, to say no more and become a rescuer less often, and Barbara learns from Lee to be more sincere, to not be afraid of her feelings and not consider them a weakness

10) in the beginning of a relationship, Jim was a taboo topic bc it was a trigger for traumatic memories for both of them. But as their relationship settled down, they began to talk about past situations. And in the end their attitude towards Jim was reduced to a funny gratitude, because if it wasn't him, they wouldn't have met and consequently wouldn't have started dating

And some more random stuff:

11) About the ThingTM I'm writing, in short, it's an alternate version of s4 where Barbara and Lee form an alliance and Barbara purposely goes to Lee as a doctor every time she has a physical injury, even if it's something as ridiculous as possible and doesn't really require serious help. Simply bc she wants to spend more time in Lee's company. Sometimes Lee thinks Barbara is just messing with her and she gets really angry about it

12) I very strongly associate them with Abba's song "Voulez-Vous" (I'm a big fan of old disco, Zsasz moment) "Take it now or leave it Now is all we get Nothing promised, no regrets Voulez-vous Ain't no big decision You know what to do La question c'est voulez-vous(!)" *** "I'm really glad you came, you know the start, you know the game Master of the scene We've done it all before and now we're back to get some more You know what I mean."

from Barbara's perspective, they sound to me like Franz Ferdinand's "Take me out." I think Barbara was really annoyed by Lee's unrequited feelings And the Haley Heynderickx's "The Bug Collector", just about the mentally unhealthy x mentally healthy dynamic 13) Because of the scene below I associate Lee with the red color and Barbara with blue (and I think it suits them very well, yes it's cliché, but it's about heat/cold and I'm very fond of connections to ancient things, so here I have a life/death association, mainly because in ancient times blood was associated with life (even though blood loss leads to death) and the graves of the dead were sprinkled with ochre. And black was associated with death of course, dark night too as a symbolism of death and blue in general is easy to take to black. (I even have on this ground not that au but just images of life!Lee and death!Barbara). Well, and there is a logical association that Lee is a doctor and accordingly just within the framework of his profession does everything to prolong human life, and Barbara is a criminal and without much hesitation kills people (if I remember correctly, during the show Barbara killed 34 people or so😭)

I guess that's it for now. Again HUGE thanks for the question, it was really cool to at least structure my thoughts about them a bit. Hopefully some of that made sense And have a nice day!💕 p.s. and I have to admit that sometimes I'm soooo embarrassed that I ship thompkean bc it's like we have canon Barbara x Tabitha and the actors who play Jim and Lee are married in real life like…😭😭😭 I feel guilty but I can't help myself I love them sm And this is the first ship since my teenage years that makes me want to crawl on the walls chew rocks and cry because they're not canon (about nygmobblepot: it could be the same there, but I consider them canon. case closed)

#thompkean #gotham fox #gotham #ask #dear god and i think this isn't all bc i wrote it in a rush #i don't even know why am i so obsessed w them #Barbara kean #Lee thompkins

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sapphos-darlings · 2 years

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is there a way to be somewhat sure of what your sexuality is when you haven't actually been in a relationship with anyone yet?

unfortunately i spent quite a good part of my teens on the internet and generally stuck inside, due to the pandemic and mental health issues, so again unfortunately i am quite terminally online lol.

when i was younger and to this day i spent a lot of time consuming/reading about lgbt related topics, getting somewhat involved in some online communities, etc, so i'm afraid that spending so much time on that during my formative years may have caused me to unconsciously fabricate my attraction to women as a way to feel included. i feel like i can't trust my feelings, bc how can i know if they're genuine or products of me essentially psy-oping myself into trying to be something i'm not?

i understand that i should probably give it time, let real experiencies with real people tell, but this uncertainty kills me because this is incredibly important to my life. i need to know if i'll ever have to come out to my parents, whether i'll live a "normative" (for the lack of a better word) life or not, whether all that time i spent was me finding myself or invading spaces never meant for me as a confused teen.

really sorry for the long rambly ask and the personal stuff, i wish i could simplify it but idk how to. thank you in advance, and a good day/night to the mods <3

Hey there!

First off - you haven't been invading spaces, or taking up resources, or fabricating anything. Finding yourself is a key part of one's teen years, and questioning people have always walked hand in hand with the LGBT community. It's okay to question! None of us would be here if we hadn't. Now, that said, I think you're getting up on the wrong foot here.

Let's take a person in a friend group that loves chocolate ice cream. The person walking in hasn't made up their mind about chocolate ice cream, but suddenly, it's the talk of the town. Everyone around them is talking about chocolate ice cream and the new kinds of chocolate ice cream the shop in town sells, like, oh my god did you try out the flavour with hazelnuts in it?? And this person goes with their friend group to have ice creams at the shop, and of course they try out the chocolate ice cream, since it's been hyped so much.

Now... how do you feel, as the friend who tried out the chocolate ice cream? Did you hate it, or just find it kind of nasty, but because your friends loved it you figured it's kind of part of the experience, that that's part of the appeal of chocolate ice cream that it kind of feels foreign to be eating it, and you'd rather be having mint? Or did you go, wow, this is actually pretty good, wow, I like this ice cream, if I came here all on my own I might order this again? Or would you, coming to the shop alone, only buy that ice cream because you feel that your friends might find it weird if you didn't buy chocolate ice cream?

See, you can't really lie to yourself about what you like. There's an instinctive reaction of oh, god that happens one way or the other when you're tasting something. If you dig women, and feel fuzzy and excited at the thought of women, and like thinking of women and daydreaming about women, and you find yourself drawn to women in media and around you, going, "wow she's so pretty", maybe even "wow I'd like to kiss her", or "I'd love to wake up in the morning to have her sitting in my kitchen like she belongs there", the chances are that this is just who you are, and this is natural to you. If your gut reaction is more along the line of... well, women are pretty, sure, but I don't have any particular interest in touching them or being close to them, and the thought of them doesn't really make me feel any way in particular, it's all just, meh, whatever, then you probably aren't interested in women. And, of course, if you think about women and go, "good lord this is kind of gross, I'm gonna think about something else now", that's a good sign that you're really not attracted to women at all.

You don't need to try people out like food to know that you like them, actually. People are more like shoes - even if one pair doesn't fit you, you already know by the looks of it that you like them. Like, wow, this pair feels like shit when I'm wearing it, but I love the looks of it, so I'm going to keep looking for ones like these that actually fit me. Similarly, as you grow and age, you might come to decide that the type of shoes you liked before is past you now, and you're moving on to a different look next. It's similar with people.

Most importantly: if you're expecting a grand revelation upon entering a relationship with someone, you probably won't find it there. Attraction, or lack thereof, predates official statements. If you enter a relationship with someone you don't feel a particular way about before, you'll continue feeling that way after, and at worst because you didn't really care, all that added expectation will just make you aversed to them and the relationship as a whole. Sex with someone you're not sure about won't give you a big revelation, aside from whether you like or don't like or want sex with that particular person. Interest, attraction, is an innate experience, not an external one. So you can find yourself sitting inside in front of your screen all your life the same you can find yourself out there in the world, making mistakes with real people while you try to read your own inner dialogue. Neither path guarantees that you'll end up on the right track.

Finally - whether you have to worry about coming out tomorrow, as important as it feels to you to feel secure in your life today, is actually not important. You can work towards making it a possibility, making it safer, by making clear to the people around you that you support and embrace LGBT rights and are open to these experiences. You can work towards better legislation, safety and security for LGBT people now, so if you have to join the ranks tomorrow, it'll be a world in which you feel more comfortable doing so then. But right now, there's no foolproof, fast track way to figure yourself out. We're on this journey our whole lives, and sometimes hearing your inner voice and understanding your feelings takes a long time. You can't hurry up your own development, your own life experience. It all comes to you with time.

#mod sade #lgbt #ask

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johnsbleu · 2 years

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Hii, hope you're having a good day! I'm just dropping some numbers for the questions thing: 3,4 and 9💞

hi! i'm hope you're doing well!

Ooooh this is gonna be fun and hard lmao

3: favorite line of narration? this is so hard!!! hmh is genuinely so freaking long and i obviously remember stuff from way back but i think i'll go with someone more recent and that was in the chapter where reader has her baby blues and we shift to john's POV (chapter 131)

Seeing her face light up, that dimple deepen in her cheek when she grins at me, hearing her sweet laugh, it all ignites something deep inside of me and gives me life like nothing ever has before.

i just love how much he loves her and finally getting to be in his head and see the way he feels about her was something i wanted to do for a while, and i had so much fun writing it. the whole part just brings tears to my eyes (ik that's lame) i just love how much he loves her and i love that he's so proud to be her husband and how they've helped each other grow as people

4. favorite line of dialogue? i was actually thinking about this the other day, like if hmh was a romance novel what would be the quote that everyone screamed over or something, you know? and honestly idk. the one that always sticks out to me is from chapter 49 (lmaoooo so long ago) and it's after jimmy and tess get married. tess is eating cereal in their kitchen and john and reader have just come inside from having sex in his car lmao. tess notices john's scars bc he's shirtless and asks where he got them and he points to reader and says "ask my map" idk why i just love that line. i think it goes to show how honest he is with her and how they've stayed up late and talked about each scar and where he got them. it's just an intimate thing. he's so vulnerable with reader and so open with her. he never lies about his past (yes he leaves out details every now and then) but he does tell her. there are plenty of scars that he has that she doesn't know anything about but he'll tell her eventually (aka when jw4 comes out and we see how he gets them and i can write about it lmaooo) i probably have some other lines of dialogue that i love but i'm having a hard time focusing lmao

9. were there any alternate versions of this fic? Yes! i actually wrote one where they met because jimmy and tess were already dating. jimmy was going to set them up on a double date and they were going to meet at jimmy's apartment. john was going to drive her home (she was still going to live across the street i believe or live in an apartment in oyster bay) and then ask her out on a one on one date. i was originally going to end hmh like after john met reader's mom for christmas. i was gonna have reader get taken by someone from john's past, then i was like nah i feel like that's been done before. and when i started writing hmh i didn't want them to have kids but now i can't imagine them without ronan. there was also another one where she was gonna meet john at the bookshop and immediately know who he was but i knew i wanted her to not know who john was bc she's not from new york. but in the end i love how hmh started!

#long post #sorry i ramble #i remember thinking no one would read hmh after like 30 chapters #i can't thank you all enough for sticking around!<33333 #ask #aragornswife

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snugglebuddyhan · 2 months

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It's so funny hearing my mom genuinely say she doesn't understand why my brother doesn't come around. Well.........

1. She punished him by grounding him to his room for an entire summer when he was in junior high. That's 3 whole months. Nearly 90 days of literal solitary confinement. He wasn't allowed to play video games, read, watch movies or play with anything. She wouldn't even let me go see him, so he was also cut off from communicating with anyone. The only time he could leave was to eat and if he wanted to use the bathroom he'd have to knock on his door to let her know, bc she locked him in from the outside. She treated him brining a playboy magazine into the house like a federal offense. Had him locked up like a prisoner and treated him like one. When the summer was up he came out that room a different person. It's like something inside his brain shifted. There was no doubt in my mind that some type of psychological damage had been done. Forced solidarity can really mess a person up that's why the Union Nations and several human rights organizations consider it to be "solitary torture" if the confinement lasts longer than 15 consecutive days, because of how "inhumane" it is. He was in that room for 90 days

2. There was a time she was yelling at him and knocked him out of the chair he was sitting in. She hit him so hard it also threw him over the bed and onto his face on the floor all, bc he didn't respond to her when she wanted him to. Why do you think he didn't speak up? Bc you were in his face screaming at the top of your lungs. She was scaring him and her putting her hands on him only proved why he was so afraid to begin with. She hit him like he was a grown ass man. So, not only was there mental and verbal abuse, there was also physical abuse. Far more than just this incident

3. AND she accused him of raping me when I was younger. I remember waking up one morning with my shorts off at the end of the bed. I was confused by how it happened until I realized it was the pair I liked to wear that were way too big for me. I had to tie them really tight to keep them up and on top of that they were made out of this really silky material. They probably came undone and slid off in my sleep, bc of how much I toss and turn. Well, she took it upon herself to jump to the most absolute insane conclusion possible with no questions asked. She called up everybody she knew and told them what he "did" and she said all of this while he was RIGHT there on multiple occasions. I can't even begin to imagine what was going through his head as his mother told everyone he was a rapist and to this day she's never apologized or made any effort to even acknowledge what she did or how it could have affected him

But OH! She wonders why he doesn't come visit. Some people don't just forgive and forget or let things go, bc some time has passed. He can take it to his grave and I wouldn't blame him

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rinbowaman · 1 year

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so hee from the mgr au became like obsessed with yn at somepoint? like even when he was still with vicky right? so what was his pov ? like the moment he met her and everything that happened what when on in his mind, how did he know she was just the one.. i suppose?

idk i find his character so intriguing it would cool to hear more of his part of the story!!

if u dont mind me asking all of this ofc <3 i loved the story and the sequel is great so far!!!

First, I'm so thrilled to hear that you enjoy the story and the characters. I really enjoy writing them out, and in later chapters, whenever I get to them for re-edits, there will be more about the male MC, you'll actually start getting to know a side of him either next chapter or the one after in MRE, which i'm going to try and post today and tomorrow.

I wrote alot to give you a better breakdown on MGR/MRE heeseung below, so i hope that gives you the answer. I really enjoyed answering questions so if you have any more, feel free to reach back out.

MGR/MRE Heeseung is a little bit of a hopeless romantic. He was always a sweet, hard working, talented and a very innocent type of boy growing up. when he grew into the stages of early adulthood, and started to notice girls and explore sex, he really couldn't get into finding any sort of enjoyment unless there was a strong emotional connection, regardless if it was sudden or built over time. (if you read the MGR series, towards the later chapters, theres an internal monologue where heeseung literally opens up and you learn a whole lot about his past and personal life...its going to be in one of the 18+ chaps)

MGR/MRE Heeseung is/has always been a nice person, a very nice guy, but he's also one you do not want to piss off. So he's got a very unique, soft and kind personality but also a strong one as well. Beginning MRE series, he's tired and established that vicky is not worth the effort (she had been cheating on him with gabe just bc well..money unfortunately) He was at stage where he was highly considering breaking it off with her, just trying to be considerate on how to do it without crushing her. Or he was about to, like was just waiting for the opportune time to do it. Or maybe in between both.

Heeseung's fondness for you was developed over time. When he met you and saw your gestures of courtesy and saw how nice, genuine and original you were, that triggered him to immediately develop a fondness for you. As time went by, you guys built a bond and got to know each other, normally when he was waiting for vicky to get out of class inside your dorm (after you extended the invite ofc) he became even fonder of you.

This gave him just that last little push he needed to just break it off with vicky, and thats why he pretty much ghosted her, normally he would opt to handle things rationally and end things with at least providing closure, but he didnt do that with vicky because he was overwhelmed with thoughts of you. like he was really into you and couldn't function because he was started to develop really strong feelings after getting to know you more and more each day.

The point where he did end up becoming obsessed or infatuated with you was during the last chapter of MGR (during the very 18+ scene) where if you recall reading it, he paused and asked you a question that took you by surprise. when you gave your answer, you can tell by his response to you that you were exactly what he was looking for, and at that moment thats when he became completely enamored by you. like you are what he breathes, drinks, sleeps, and eats.

Now i dont know a whole lot about the members, i have a friend who is a part of the enha community and her bias is heeseung. when she asked me to re-edit the draft to reflect hee/read MC, i asked her to give me like a full breakdown of heeseungs personality so i could add a flare of real heesung (ie, his kindness and his enjoyment for simple things in life vibe). she informed me many things, but the one thing that stuck out that i used to really help develop the yearn for love in his MGR character, was when she told me that he really loves his mom and compliments her. when i saw videos of him talking to his mom on the phone to get a feel of their bond, i translated that side to MGR hee.

he's a man who loves his family, really loves his mom because she's an amazing kind woman with a soft voice and the way he watched how she would love and take care of his dad growing up, really enabled him to yearn for someone that was similar to her in that aspect. so in MGR/MRE series, you reflect the same type of virtues, strengths, and feminine appeal that his mom has displayed towards his dad, and it just makes him feel wholesome and nostalgic. and that is really what triggered him to like you in the first place.

Now i will close with this. MGR/MRE heeseung has kind of the Rurouni Kenshin effect. he's nice, loving, caring, and a very ethical type of person. Once he does get pissed off (and its gotta be like really bad) thats when the Battosai comes out, ya feel me? so the latest chapter, we kinda dabbed into that regarding his sexual nature (Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde) which this side of him, i just imagined up all on my own, but just a hint, one of the next chapters, it might shock you just how...whats the word i'm looking for?....contemptuous. he's creative both beautifully and terribly (if he needs to be) and the next chapter (or the one after) might shock you.

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redacted-headcannons · 3 years

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Obey Me 18+ Headcanons: “You’re My Favorite”

Y’all have been warned!

Scenario: Things they would say after you’ve told them “You’re My Favorite” in a spicy situation.

Lucifer

you’re being railed on his dark cherry wood desk

gripping the edge of the table, you whisper that he’s your favorite

“glad you could be so honest with me, MC”

“but I already knew the truth”

“no, really, say it again”

“scream it”

“let them know whose your favorite, dove”

Mammon

there was a morning assembly

you and mammon snuck off to an empty classroom

mammon is behind you, chest pressed against your back with two fingers in you

“that’s right, human”

“I am your favorite”

“Say it again”

“Again”

“Fuck, more more more”

Leviathan

movie marathon night and its levi’s turn to pick!

all his brothers abandoned bc the series is too long

your legs are spread on the couch and hes already pumping inside you

his tail has you by the throat

“Whose your favorite, MC?”

“I saw them staring at you, MC, but you’re all mine”

“Hmmm? I can’t hear you”

“I can still smell them on you and I hate it”

Satan

you have his shaft in your mouth in the middle of the library

you’ve been choking but his hands are in your hair, holding you in place

with a sound ‘pop’ your lips come up and you smile while saying, “This is why you’re my favorite, Satan”

“Oh this?”

“Believe me, we can get much worse than this”

“I won’t just be your favorite, MC”

“You’ll worship me after I’m done with you” he smirks looking down at you

Asmodeus

“Now, now, sweetie, tell me again”

“It’s you, Asmo, you’re my favorite!” You whine into the mattress

Asmo has you face down, ass up and gleefully he gives your ass a sound ‘smack’

“Oh! I’m your favorite” he giggles, eyes shut from the grip you have on his cock

“That’s right, MC, I’m your favorite”

“Because no one, no one, fucks you like I do”

“And no one ever will”

Beelzebub

“Do you have a favorite snack, MC?” Beel says while you’re cuddled on his bed

for a moment you consider answering his question genuinely

“You are, Beel,” you say while looking up at him

“Go ahead, give your favorite snack a taste,” he chuckles while pulling his grey joggers down unleashing his shaft

“Don’t eat too fast, you’ll choke”

“Hmm, I guess I’m also hungry”

“Come here,” he growls before pulling you to 69

Belphegor

he asks the question bluntly

“Whose your favorite to fuck, MC?”

Absolutely stunned you stutter out that it’s him

he’s already crawling on top of you, slyly popping open buttons and unzipping zippers on the way up

“Are you sure?”

“Shouldn’t we test it?”

“I just wanna make sure that it’s true, MC”

“And if its not, then I’m just going to have to persuade you”

Diavolo

he’s sitting upright against a wall as you ride him

a deep blush crawls against your skin as you tell him that he’s your favorite

“Sweetheart, I already knew that,” he chuckles hot air into your ear biting the lobe after his sentence

“But, let’s not risk anything, okay? Let’s make sure”

“Look at this, my favorite exchange student just making a mess of themselves just for me”

“All because I’m your favorite”

Barbatos

you’re in the kitchen helping him prepare snacks for the brothers and guests

“MC, Solomon mentioned that I am your favorite among the demons” he breathes out cautiously

“that’s because you are, Barbatos!” you say, popping cream into your mouth for a taste test

suddenly Barbatos is on you, pinning you to the counter and his tongue is swirling the cream in your mouth

“I’m normally not very adventurous, MC”

“But as your favorite, I will try to impress” he smirks down at you, his tails snaking their way up your body from under your clothes

“But do be quiet, MC, we are in the kitchen”

“Shhh, don’t make me gag you, MC”

Simeon

“You’re so good, MC” he moans out as you struggle to fit his shaft inside you from your position on top of him

“How very sinful of you, Simeon,” you breathe out, “this is why you’re my favorite”

Something glints in his eyes

The air has changed

“Let me show you how truly sinful I am”

“Repent, MC, you’re corrupting an angel”

“Go on, take all of it and beg for forgiveness”

have fun on the wheelchair tomorrow <3

Solomon

you’re already chanting his name in his room

not because he’s on you but rather because he’s not

tied up, tears threatening to spill from the corners of your eyes, and a toy jammed roughly in you

“Who makes you feel like this?”

“Who owns you?”

“Whose your favorite?”

out of spite, you reply, “Asmodeus”

the toy shuts off and you know you’ve done it now

#obey me smut #obey me! shall we date?#obey me lucifer smut #obey me mammon smut #obey me leviathan smut #obey me satan smut #obey me asmodeus smut #obey me beelzebub smut #obey me belphie smut #obey me diavolo smut #obey me barbatos smut #obey me simeon smut #obey me solomon smut

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leossmoonn · 2 years

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matt eating you out when you're horny during your pregnancy (when you're like 3-4 months pregnant) bc he doesn't want to poke the baby while fucking you

DAMN WHORE HOURS ACTIVATED

16+!

Pregnancy sex sounds soooo 🥰 OMG AND ESPECIALLY BC YOURE LIKE SO ANGRY AND PISSED OF DURING PREGNANCY. the hormones are not holding back.

You are always snapping at people and wanting to punch a wall. And the angry crying 😭 felt that so hard.

But Matt is awesome and he supports you even when you yell at him sometimes and cry uncontrollably. Omg but during month like 3 your emotions get so bad… Matt genuinely thinks you’re gonna burst. And then Foggy suggests sex and Matt’s like

“I could poke the baby”

😭😭 HELP

and foggy is like “bruh. You wont. But if you’re that worried, oral is always good.”

And Matt then debates and is like “mmmm okay…”

He’s actually really excited bc you two have had sex, but like it’s very rarely (which he doesn’t care bc you’re literally growing a child inside of you. Like if you don’t want to have sex then he’s okay with it) BUT he also does research and finds out it can help with your anger and stuff so then he starts his plan

You’re watching tv and Matt comes home from work. Man is so kidding you notice him grinning from ear to ear. You’re like “what are you up to?”

Matt ignored your questions and asks how your day is and makes you dinner and you’re kinda surprised? Like Matt’s a good husband ofc but it seems as though he’s trying extra hard

Once you two are in bed that’s when Matt starts mission make your stress go away

It’s safe to say you’re in a good mood too — for once. (Jk lmao). He’s cuddling you and he starts to slip his hand up your thigh. And you immediately know what’s happening

“Matt no,” you say. “You sure? We haven’t even started?” Matt asked

And omg you’re next words make Matt feel so bad 😭 “I know I haven’t really been in the mood lately and I’m sorry. Pregnancy sucks and I feel so tired and bloated all the time. I don’t think I can do anything —”

And he’s like “WOAH WOAH WOAH who said anything abt you doing something?”

And youre like “I dunno I just feel bad I guess.”

He gives you a reassuring smile and starts to kiss you. He trails down to your neck before speaking again.

“I don’t need anything. This is for you, if you want it.”

“You sure?” You ask. Your heart is pounding and you don’t miss the butterflies that are fluttering below your waist

“Let me take care of you, sweetheart”

😵‍💫😵‍💫 help

That’s enough to make you lay on your back and let him get to work. Man you two did not sleep that night. And Matt just kept on giving. He missed the feel of you in his hands, the way you tasted, his name on your tongue as you moaned.

SO FUCKING LOUD. he is acting like he is starving, like he hasn’t tasted you in forever

He cannot get enough of you. He is a thirsty man. His tongue is weaving through your heat while his thumb is rubbing tight circles on your clit. And his other hand is grabbing at your ass and breasts, massaging the skin and running the pad of his thumb over your nipples

Omg and when you come for like the third time that night, he lifts his head up and his lips and chin are glistening with you

You are so out of breath and relaxed and happy

You’re like “tf where that came from?”

He grins and says “thought I’d be a nice stress reliever”

You’re like 😳😳😳 “it def was”

#matt concepts #matt murdock x reader #matt murdock x reader smut #sara.nsfw

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