#i am the tiniest guy on this earth... how will i do this when i am literally so small(<-is just anxious) | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ratcatcher0325 · 2 years

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A Fraction of Justice (Size Switch AU)

What if Alexander and Natalie suddenly switched sizes?

This is just a fun little one off to explore these two and their dynamic a bit more. I promised you guys this, forever ago, for hitting a new follower milestone and now it’s finally here!

I have to thank a million times over @not-a-space-alien, @kitn-underfoot, @sizechaun, & @littlescaryinternetguy for beta reading for me and giving me some amazing feedback!

**Please let me know if you’d like to be added to the tag list**

This is a size switch AU story of Alexander, a well-dressed, silver-tongued miniature person, who’s highly intelligent (perhaps, too much for his own good). He has aspirations of becoming the world’s tiniest lawyer. When he meets Natalie, will she help or hinder his progress?

Set in a universe where miniature people (around 5 inches tall) are kept as pets for the rich, this story follows one very tiny, academically minded man, who, after enduring abuse at the hands of the ignorant humans around him, becomes hell bent on finding a way to fight this oppression through the legal system. Will his case win out? He has to get humans to listen first. When he finds himself out allied with one, will she finally be the first to hear his message?

A mixture of fluff and angst, mature (Language, adult themes and violence) but SFW. This story uses the pet trope as a means to explore themes of overcoming trauma and fighting back against abuse, as well as learning to love oneself.

Word Count: 9,264 Read Time: Approx. 70 mins

CW: adult language, angst, fear play, dehumanization, non-sexual nudity

Tag list: @gatlily; @grbene; @patrocolus3; @beautifulunknowntrash; @titan-god-420; @andraimeide; @themarlo; @cup-o-chai; @lucentbliss; @raccoontoaster, @tolsizedlove; @not-a-space-alien; @thegodmother007; @honey-olive; @kitn-underfoot; @bittykimmy13; @littlescaryinternetguy; @pr-fae; @theangelofdusk; @sizechaun; @rubeau-art; @awkwardgtace; @jae-from-discord; @narrans;

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A Fraction of Justice: Not all that Blisters (Size Switch AU)

[Alexander’s POV]

I was lying prone on my stomach, deep in a tantalizing sleep. It was, in fact, some of the best sleep I’d gotten in some time. Natalie and I had been burning the candle at both ends helping her prepare for an upcoming exam. While she had retired to her bedroom around 3 am, I’d insisted on staying in the living room, surrounded by open tomes, and a tablet for doing research. I’d wanted to master one last sample case study before getting some rest myself.

Evidently, I’d passed out in that endeavor, no doubt splayed out on my stomach, lying on top of her open textbook. Not much for a bed in the comfort department, but nevertheless, come dawn, I was out cold. On a different morning than this one, I could imagine a better rested Natalie rubbing the sleep from her eyes and shuffling into the living room, ignited with inviting, golden, morning sun, only to wake me with her bemused chuckling, finding me unconscious, curled up on the surface of her book.

Instead, this morning was distinctly different.

There were no peals of uncontrolled laughter or the caressing of giant fingers on the crown of my head to wake me from my dreamless sleep. No, I was bolted awake, instead, as I shuffled my leg slightly. One small shift of my weight and I was greeted with a sudden, heart stopping CRASH of a hardback colliding with the wood floor beneath. Had I been more awake, I would have questioned how on earth the shifting of my meager few ounces could have possibly made such a reaction happen. Since my brain did not have the capacity for such critical thinking in its unexpected and sudden state of consciousness, I instead grunted, snapping open my eyes as I pressed my palms into the ground beneath me, and lifted my head.

Like encountering a sudden step down when walking, my hands were jarred by feeling a variance of textures beneath them. Instead of the consistent, flat surface of the page I was expecting, my hands rested on the rough edges of paper, and the fabric of the couch, which seemed suddenly much more pliable beneath my weight than I’d previously remembered. Similarly, as feeling returned to the rest of my body, I was shocked to find myself lying on what felt like all manner of other books and fabric.

Incapable of understanding what I was feeling, my eyes adjusted to the painfully bright light of the unfiltered morning sun. I squinted, shielding my sensitive irises and blinking rapidly. Slowly, the world came into sharp focus.

Why is the arm of the couch so close? I could’ve sworn when I’d surrendered to sleep I’d been at least two feet (in human measurements) from the wall it created compared to my little body. Now, my nose was so near to bumping it I could feel the tickle of its fibers on the sensitive nerve endings. In fact, as I raised my trunk to greet this corner of the living room (the same space in which I’d first found myself when Natalie had accidentally brought me inside) everything seemed somehow different? Smaller? Was I experiencing delirium from pushing myself too hard these last few days? Tucking my left leg under me to try and sit up, I felt all manner of obstacles shifting beneath my weight. That’s the first time I looked down. I couldn’t believe what my eyes were undeniably showing me.

I was not just lying on the singular textbook. No. The pages that used to stretch on and on around me, each about four times as large as my whole body, were now dwarfed by my outstretched palms. Two hands side by side could cover the surface of a page with ease. My heart stopped. No way!!! This couldn’t be possible. It was simply, logically, out of the question. Wasn’t it?!? Beneath my legs, other books, the tablet, the cushions of the couch, all of these were touched by my outstretched form. My entirely nude form.

Then, down below on the surface of the textbook, a wrinkled scrap of multicolored fabric caught my eye. Reaching down, I pinched it between a thumb and forefinger, raising it to eye level. Adrenaline coursed through my nervous system as blood pounded in between my ears. It was undeniable. I laid it out in the palm of my hand. It was ripped apart along all the seams, but the front was still somewhat in tact. That damn unicorn decal, sickeningly cheery as ever, was now half the size of my thumbnail.

Somehow, inextricably I was…. Human sized.

My heart soared as I bounded to my feet, rocked by this completely different perspective. Everything was so pathetically small. As I stood, I couldn’t help ducking my head, as though I was large enough to collide with the ceiling itself.

To any human, I was now unremarkably normal. To me, I felt like a giant. Furniture that had once towered over me like empty monuments of wood, fabric and metal to the prestige and supposed superiority of humankind, now seemed laughably unimpressive. As I turned my head, I could take in so much more of the room at once, with effortless ease. Gazing back down at the mess of clutter left scattered across the couch, I bent at the waist and with a thrilling rush, actually picked up a book for the first time in my life.

Cradling its spine in my right hand, I leafed through pages with nothing but a tiny bit of pressure from my fingers. My face felt warm as my heart thundered away. The tome I couldn’t have pushed an inch if I’d put my back into it, was now an insignificant weight in my palm. I felt a catch in my throat. Was this what it felt like to occupy a world that was built to accommodate you?

I turned over my shoulder to look at the potted rose bush, still sitting before the window by the front door, just as Natalie had set it down that day I was tangled in its branches. Setting the book down, I limped over until I was standing before it. The whole plant that I had once hidden inside of, now barely came up past my thighs. It was disorienting seeing these things from such a different perspective. So many tiny details of the plant faded and blurred from this new vantage point. I made my way back to the couch, sitting down on it properly for the first time in my life, I picked up a book again. Still thrilled by the sensation of being able to do so.

Before I could delve too much more into my emotions, however, the sound of an alarm clock blaring from across the apartment pricked my ears. Natalie! For a moment I’d forgotten her completely. But now, I realized with embarrassment, I was sitting, stark naked in her home. I needed to alert her to this miraculous change!

I wouldn’t begin to batter my brain with the impossible implications of how this had come to be…. Not yet. I would indulge in the pure ecstasy of it having happened first. Tucking the book under one arm, clutching the pathetic little scrap of fabric that had once fit over my whole body and snatching up a throw pillow to cover myself, I took steps towards Natalie’s bedroom.

The vertigo of walking through this space was akin to arriving on land after weeks at sea. The disorientation was nausea inducing. My body, mind, and senses were all adjusting to a very different world all at once. I caught my shoulder on the threshold of the kitchen from the living room, as I heard Natalie snooze her voice activated alarm. Well, I couldn’t hear her voice but the tinny buzzing had ceased. I stopped for a moment before the pantry door, pushing it open with light pressure from the back of my hand.

The motion-censored light ignited with a distinguishable click as I stood there, gawking at the very same structure I had fought so dutifully to climb, injuries and all. Where I had been found by her. Loomed over by her. Picked up and manhandled. Where I had bit her and she’d dropped me. All of that had taken place in this cramped, dusty little hole of a pantry? No wonder she’d chuckled when she watched me cling for dear life to the edge of the shelf that, at the time, felt so impossibly high. Now, that same white wooden slat didn’t even rise past my shin. I palmed the stupid little doll shirt again, utterly amazed.

Shaking it off, I ventured forward, toward Natalie’s room. Pressing into her partially closed door, I whispered sharply, unsure if she’d tried to go back to sleep, “Natalie! You wont believe this!” It was still loud enough that it should have caught her half conscious attention.

Pushing the door open, I could now see into the room: the comforter undulating in peaks and valleys that would have been climbable only last night. But as I scanned the full breadth of the mattress, I saw no shock of dark, wavy hair. No olive arms or feet peeking out from between the cascading sheets. The bed, as far as I could tell, appeared to be empty.

“N-Natalie? Are you awake?” Perhaps she was in the bathroom? I didn’t want to startle her if she needed her privacy. I was, after all, now the size of a human man just standing, barely covered in her most private space. I wondered with a thundering heart what it would be like to behold her, human to human. Would she be shorter than me? Given the average differences between male and female bodies, it was highly likely. The thought made me chuckle in spite of myself. Still, when I turned to look, the bathroom light was off and the door was only cracked by a quarter. My brow furrowed. Where was she? I called out again, suddenly worried for a reason I couldn’t clearly articulate.

*************

I groaned, feeling pissed and immediately in a ticked off mood. How could someone so little be so fucking loud all of a sudden?

Up until a few minutes ago, I’d been totally conked out, warm and so, so comfortable in bed. When my alarm went off, I didn’t even bother opening my eyes. The world could wait. I needed sleep, goddammit! I’d just settled back in to catch some more Z’s when Alexander started vying for my attention.

Last I knew, he’d been in the living room. It’d made me sad to go to bed without him near but I knew what picking fights over stuff like that would get me, so I shut up about it. I wanted to spare myself the earful. After retiring to bed, I’d just assumed he’d fallen asleep on the couch. Come morning, I was looking forward to sleeping in for a little longer before waking him up with the smells of breakfast.

Instead, here he was whispering louder than I thought possible for someone with the lung capacity of a mouse. Also, how had he managed to crawl into my bed to be so near me in the first place? That was the only reason I could explain to myself why his voice seemed to be so much louder than I was used to. I wondered, with a sluggish mind, if the comforter had trailed close enough to the floor and he’d climbed up. Honestly? That’s impressive, little man! You just really wanna be close to me all of a sudden? That thought made me happy. But then his voice seemed to boom directly overhead, which, how? I clamped my eyes shut, rolling over and groaning. Be quiet, Alexander!

“Natalie?? Natalie where— oh….”

Before I could ask him nicely to shut the fuck up if it wasn’t an emergency, cold air rushed all around me and light suddenly flooded in, as though the roof had been ripped off of the building. What the fuck?!

Utterly confused, I shot up, eyes adjusting from their groggy state. When my vision came to, all I could see looming over me, backlit from the sun filtering in through my windows behind was… a… a… MONSTER!!!

It was something… vaguely person shaped but too big…. much much too big for that to be possible. My mind was unable to reason, unable to problem solve or think rationally. I could not comprehend that the familiar voice I’d just heard and this monstrosity, this silhouetted something were one and the same.

The second I laid eyes on whatever it was, I screamed at the top of my lungs and scrambled to get as far away as I possibly could. Barely able to rise to my feet on the surface of the confusingly unsteady sheets, I suddenly realized it wasn’t just the monster that was huge.. so was my bed! My attempts to stand resulted in me taking in the oceanic scale of my mattress, which seemed to stretch onward all around me: the wrinkles in the sheets, like undulating but motionless waves.

I trembled, also recognizing that I was completely naked, the folds of my pajamas now rising and falling beneath my feet. I was shivering from head to toe, but wether that was from cold or pure fear, I couldn’t tell. My limbs were quaking against my will, as I felt a tightening in my chest. It was nearly impossible for me to focus on any one thing for any period of time, my head was on fire and my eyes twitched, trying to take in the sheer monstrous scale of everything around me. My bedroom ceiling soared above me in some atmospheric blur, the walls Ising in the distance like some man-made Grand Canyon. I shook my head wishing I could block all of this out. As my heart thundered against my ribcage, I couldn’t take this feeling of being trapped and in mortal danger like some frightened little animal, I scrambled as fast as I could, falling all over myself, when I heard a voice, distant but all too loud, crash into my ear drums.

“Woah, woah Natalie! Calm down! It’s just me…” as the words rattled my skull, an inky shadow like some carnivorous bird of prey circling overhead, cast out the light above me as a palm came crashing down directly in my path. I tried my best to halt and turn on my heel but ended up colliding directly with the wall of flesh.

Caught with nowhere to run, I pressed into his palm, pathetically attempting to cover myself as I craned my neck high, high above, while the voice continued, “…It’s Alexander.” I could feel his chuckle reverberate through his palm that I was now stuck to like an insect on flypaper, “You don’t recognize me?”

My heart stuck in my throat. It was him. Those piercing blue eyes were unmistakable. But he was huge!!! So completely, overwhelmingly huge! His bare chest rose and fell to the tide of his breathing. I couldn’t wrap my brain around how big each of those lungs had to be. He was almost silhouetted by the light from the window but I could see his sharp jaw, his cascading bangs, his furrowed brow and tense lips. Fuck, fuck fuck! I was so small now, so defenseless and vulnerable. For so long Alexander had wanted to tear me limb from limb for condescending to and manhandling him. Well… now he could if he wanted to. I shook from head to toe, trapped with nowhere to run.

*******

She cowered against me. I had no idea what to do with her. She was clearly quite frightened. Welcome to every day of my entire life. I’d had this fantasy a million times in my rage-addled brain: I’d pored over just how to get back at her for the million infuriating moments she’d made for me in my time here. Let’s see how you’d like it being bandied about and dropped and trapped and prodded all day long. For going on decades now, I had thirsted for power over those who’d mistreated me.

My gaze fixed on her outstretched hand, pressing firmly into the flesh of my palm. Bending a bit at the waist, I reached towards her with inquisitive fingers. She screamed when I pinched her wrist between finger and thumb, but I hardly noticed. I was fixated on the limb I now held captive. So small. Is this what I had been? Is this what I looked like to them? To humankind? With bones so tiny and delicate it looked like a stiff wind could break them? Her entire cranium was no larger than the pad of my index. Her outstretched hand, one I had been held in countless times, now hardly stretching over a nail bed. I heard nothing but the blood pounding in my own ears as I marveled at how inexplicably strange this all was.

“ALEXANDER! PLEASE!! You’re hurting me!!” I snapped to, looking down to see I still had her wrist trapped between my fingers, and that in my analysis of her newfound form, I had, absentmindedly, lifted her off of the surface of the bed. She weighed practically nothing at all! She was twisting and writhing, face a bright red, her toes desperately searching for the ground just fractions of a millimeter out of reach. She was staring directly at me. Tears streamed down her cheeks, and in that moment, staring at the form of this woman that I held aloft with the greatest of ease, I felt a weight drop into the pit of my stomach.

What am I doing??? Blood rushing to my face I lowered her down, gently releasing my grip. She snatched her hand away immediately, cradling her wrist in her other hand. She stared daggers into the fabric of the sheets before her.

“Natalie, I—“

But before I could begin my apology, her face twisted into a grimace and she suddenly started to cry and shout. "P-please, if you’re going to hurt me just do it quickly… I know you’re angry. You’re always so fucking angry. Well, looks like you got what you wanted… s-so, have at it, enjoy your… p-power over me…”

My heart of stone softened. “I don’t want to hurt you. Natalie?” With a trembling finger, I touched the tip of her chin. She jumped and I sought her eyes. “I promise I don’t want to hurt you. I’m sorry. I’m sorry I frightened you.”

Her eyes shimmered with still more tears. “D-did you do this, somehow? Make us trade places? To show me how awful it is??” Her voice was shaking as she asked the question.

I felt a twinge in my chest, but I couldn’t name the precise feeling. "No! No!! I have no idea how this happened! I swear to you. You’re giving me far more credit than I deserve. I’ve studied law not quantum physics… well, I’ve studied a little… just a few theorems….” I saw the slightest twitch out of the corner of my eye as she dipped her head, clearly, disinterested. I swallowed, recovering, while I reached for her pajama shirt and draped it around her bare shoulders. She was nowhere close to fitting in it now, “Ahem, anyway…. I’ve no hypothesis as to how this happened. It seems impossible. Perhaps it is some strange hallucination. But in any case, I’m not planning to harm you. Have you been infuriating, at times, during our journey together so far? Yes. But you managed, in spite of yourself, to keep me alive so…. That’s the least I can do for you. After all, it’s only fair!”

************

Way to be fucking encouraging. Was I supposed to be thankful he’d decided I deserved to live? I found I did believe him when he said he wasn’t trying to hurt me. That was at least one less thing to lose my mind over. I pulled the thick, scratchy fabric tighter around me. How had he survived like this for all of his life? It’d been approximately ten minutes and I was ready to throw myself off the edge of the bed. I wiped my tear stained cheeks with the back of my hand. Maybe this was all just a bad dream and I’d wake up any second and we could laugh about this while he lounged in my cupped palm.

“You’re still upset.” It was a statement not a question. I clenched my jaw, straightening my spine and glaring up at him.

“Yes, you emotionally immature dumbass, I’m still upset. Whoopdie fuckin’ do, you can open doors and pick up books now. Great for fucking you. Meanwhile, my entire world has been ripped away from me and turned upside down.” He said nothing, but the lines on his face told me everything he was thinking. This was what he’d been ranting and railing about non-stop since I’d found him in the pantry. I sighed, acquiescing, “I’m sorr—“

“I’m sorry. Truly. I’m very rarely wrong, so I mean it genuinely. I was so wrapped up in my own improved circumstances, it was hard to remember the fear that you must be experiencing. I’m sorry, Natalie, for frightening you.” His face flushed suddenly. He cleared his throat, before extending a finger towards me, the underside turned upwards. I stiffened. The digit stopped just short of my personal space, “Forgive me for my ignorance?” It was my turn to blush, I reached out with a cautious hand and squeezed the tip of his proffered finger.

“You’re forgiven. For now.” My hand rested on his finger. I could feel the thrum of his pulse, strong, steady. That made my own heart quicken its pace. Each ridge in the pad was distinct. It was overwhelming at this size how much more detailed every minuscule thing became!!

***************

I exhaled air from my nostrils, incapable of keeping my baffled thought from being spoken aloud, “Was I really this small to you?” She had been staring at the stark contrast of her outstretched hand over just the tip of my finger, but now cast her flustered gaze askance.

“Y-yes. You were so….” Sh stumbled, trying to find the words.

“…Infinitesimally delicate…” I breathed.

“I was just gonna say cute… but… yeah.” Now she was the one laughing. I stared at her with a curious, questioning gaze, “How the fuck did you have the courage to bite me at this size?? You’re fucking terrifying.” She shoved playfully at my finger. I couldn’t deny the smirk playing on my lips

“You deserved it.” I meant that in earnest.

“I know.” She replied with equal conviction.

“I deserve it too after the fright I gave you. Eye for an eye as they say….” Half joking, half in earnest truth, I brought my upturned index finger to just before her lap, “You can return the favor now, if you’d like…”

She burst into immediate laughter, “What the fuck??? I’m not gonna bite you!” She crossed her arms and cocked an eyebrow as she continued to chuckle, “What do you take me for? A dirty little rat who can’t control his animal instincts?”

“You’re still on that, are you? You do realize I could, now, easily take that as an invitation to imprison you in a glass bowl!”

She scoffed, rising to her feet, the fabric of her pajama shirt she was using to cover herself tucked beneath her arms, thrusting her chin defiantly in the air, “You wouldn’t have the balls!”

It was my turn to raise a brow, I was certainly never one to back down from a challenge.

“Is that so?” As she opened her mouth to quip back, I quickly gripped her torso, fabric and all, between a thumb and forefinger, lifting her into the air, as I straightened my spine and stood, holding her just before my eyes, “I tend to take questions of my ability rather seriously, Ms. Marquez.” My gaze met hers, and I immediately felt a wave of adrenaline crash through me.

Instead of the confident smile of the woman I’d come to know who always seemed to hit back when it came to verbal swordplay, her eyes were almost popping out of their sockets, her heart was thundering wildly against my thumb, her whole body trembled as she squirmed uncomfortably. She was so… small. I was hardly applying any pressure at all, yet she was utterly powerless to break my grip. As she struggled, she made the mistake of peering past my fingers, taking in just how high off the ground she currently was. She immediately cried out, fighting with all her might against me.

***************

THIS WAS TERRIFYING. All in a breathtaking rush, I went from relying on my own two feet, to being whisked into the air, pressure all around my ribcage as I found myself suddenly, before his eye. An eye that was as big as my whole head. I could count every sandy eyelash, every slight wrinkle around the corners. I could feel his breath on me. This was far and above too much for me to handle. Why wouldn’t he let me go? Didn’t he see how scared I was? I couldn’t help remembering, with a pang of guilt, how many times he’d protested against my fingers, heart fluttering against my skin, and I’d simply laughed at him. I had no clue it felt like this.

I continued to push and writhe. In my desperate attempt to free myself, I caught the mattress out of the corner of my eye. I did a double take. It looked like I was suspended on the very ledge of a ten story building! A building which happened to be made of a male chest, abs and hips, in one impossible wall before me. My head was pounding as I struggled to get oxygen to my lungs. I couldn't help it, I was starting to hyperventilate. I squirmed even more, tears pricking my eyes as all this went completely ignored. What was wrong with him? My vision dipped to black and that was the final straw.

“P-put me down! P-please! Put me down, NOW!”

“Don’t worry, I won’t drop—“ it was almost a light chuckle, as if my reaction was somehow funny to him.

“ALEXANDER PUT ME DOWN RIGHT NOW!!!!” I screamed at the top of my lungs. He did as he was told without a moment’s hesitation, crouching before the edge of the mattress, his chin resting on the bedspread. I collapsed, my legs like Jell-O. I couldn’t breathe.

“Natalie, you seem to be taking this rather hard, are you quite alright?” Fingers seemed to grow in size as they bore down closer and closer.

“D-DON’T! Don’t touch m-me! I need… I need a minute, please!” I was curled up into a ball, running my fingernails along my scalp like some pet bird ripping out its own feathers from stress. That’s all I was now, wasn’t I? I shuddered.

This was never something I’d had to really think about. It’s not like I ever had to worry about being in this situation. But now? As tears cascaded down my cheeks, and my breath caught in my throat I finally, really understood the source of Alexander’s anger. I was breaking after fifteen minutes, yet he’d lived his whole life this way. I hastily wiped my face with the thick scratchy shirt, each of its stitches incredibly distinct.

Through watery eyes, I looked up at the man who had once wrapped himself easily around my thumb, now towering above me, his head propped up on a fist. His striking blue eyes shimmered, his brow furrowed with concern. For once in his life he was silent. He blinked rapidly when my eyes met his. “I… I didn’t know being picked up felt… like that. No wonder you chewed me out for it every time….” He shifted his arm slightly and I could feel the ricochet effect through the surface of the mattress, to me. It made my heart skip a beat. Even his absent-minded motion was impossible for me to ignore. Tears swelled in my eyes again as I began to feel utterly overwhelmed by it all.

I opened my mouth to continue when he suddenly blurted out, “I’m rather famished. Are you?” I blinked, shaking my head. This wasn’t what I was expecting him to say. It definitely pulled me out of my sad sack, pity party.

“W-what?” I mumbled.

“I’m hungry. I assume you are, too. I don’t exactly have much… Well, to be precise, any culinary experience… I thought, perhaps, you might be willing to tutor me?” I couldn’t help but notice the subtle change in the color of his cheeks. He ran a hand through his cascading hair. My shoulders relaxed from my ears a little as my heart soared. Awwwww, he was trying, for me! He was doing his best to comfort me.

“Okay, but… it’s not my fault if you fuck it up because you won’t listen to me or follow directions.” I teased.

“I am a great follower of directions when I choose to be, thank you!”

“Oh, so up until this point you’ve been ignoring me and pissing me off by choice?” I felt a weight lifting off of my shoulders. Everything was far from fine, but it was okay to have a moment of fun. For the first time since I’d woken up, this felt… familiar.

“If you have to ask me, I evidently was doing a very poor job of making that explicitly clear.” He smirked, his eyes bright. I’d never seen eyes quite that blue before. It was like they glowed. He paused for a moment, I could see a new idea flashing behind his gaze, “I’ve no desire to hurt you, Natalie. You’ve now found yourself in a stress-inducing, highly demoralizing position. Far be it from me to add to that any further. You have been rather irritatingly flippant towards me in the past, but I am not so emotionally compromised that I intend to seek revenge for past wrongs. You know what it’s like now, and I think that’s more than enough. I don’t want you to fear me, despite all appearances and history to the contrary, I am capable of some degree of compassion.” I swallowed. I had no idea what to even say. I just sort of stared, wide-eyed as he stood to his full height. I found it necessary to swallow again.

Towering like a skyscraper, his half naked form dominated my whole point of view. Had I noticed he was ripped before? I didn’t think I’d noticed he was ripped before. Suddenly finding myself choking, I turned away, face burning hot.

“Ah…” He clicked his tongue, I still couldn’t bear to look up, “I… er… I need something to wear… May I—“

“Yup, uh huh… have an old pair of sweatpants in the bottom right drawer… Feel free to—“

“R-right, um, yes… I’ll just… walk over there…” He pushed himself away from the bed, and started to turn towards the dresser. Oh! Oh my god, he had a pillow for the front… but not the… I bit my lip and buried my head in my arms. I heard the scrape of wood as a drawer was opened, then a rustle of fabric. Not soon after, I could actually hear his individual footfalls on the carpet, like some giant out of a children’s cartoon.

He cleared his throat and I could tell he was standing before me again, “I, uh, I’m decent…” I swept the hair from my eyes as I craned my neck upwards. I almost burst out laughing. He’d managed to grab, not the pair I was thinking, but my stupid ass sweats from high school with bedazzled flowers. Without him having to turn around I knew stamped across the ass was the word “SEXY” in all caps. They were a white elephant gift and, sue me, I was a sentimental bitch. But I wouldn't be caught dead actually wearing them.

“Don’t, don’t you start…Natalie! Why? Why do you insist on continuing to insult me with the worst possible fashion choices one could possibly fathom in the darkest recesses of their mind??” They barely fit him, seeming to suffocate his waist. His face was bright red.

“Oh get over it, you big baby. At least you have something on, I’m just swimming in this!” I raised my arms to undulate the pajama shirt fabric.

“Be careful what you ask for, I’m sure you have the rest of those doll clothes lying around here, somewhere….”

I raised my hands defensively, shaking my head, “I yield the remainder of my time, your Honor.” Lawyer jokes. I was making lawyer jokes now? How else would he manage to ruin me???

***********

I laid the flat of my hand against the mess of sheets just before her reduced corpus. I watched as she sucked in a hesitant breath just as my skipping heart pounded out of its syncopated rhythm. Would she allow me to hold her? What an utterly remarkable reversal, me, holding someone between my cupped hands?? I never fathomed it could be possible. We stared at each other, neither breathing a word. Finally, determinedly, with that firm brow and cocked chin that she always displayed when she’d made up her mind about something, she tucked the fabric under her arm, and, took steps towards my hand. I smiled as the t-shirt was dragged behind her, looking like some pooling and elaborate train of a designer dress.

Gingerly, I pinched the fabric with my free, right hand, relieving her of the burden of dragging it herself. That’s when the flat of her bare foot pressed into my warm and waiting flesh and I almost gasped for air. What an almost indescribable feeling, to be a vessel for someone’s whole self. As much as it set part of my cerebrum on fire, I could begin to understand why humans wanted me trapped between their fingers so often. It was an experience unlike any other, tinged with uncertainty, strangely intimate, altogether wonderful. Rather quickly she found her way to sitting in the center of my palm, and I lifted her up to my eye-line. “Perhaps we can try this again?” I kept my voice low and soft.

“Perhaps we can.” She flashed her eyes up at me like some double confirmation. I stayed staring at the tiny woman nestled in my palm, buried under a mound of fabric: her hair, messy from sleep, cascading all around her. She reached out a hand, no bigger than my finger nail, and placed it firmly on the tip of my nose. I practically flinched. I didn’t know how I felt about all this sudden intimacy. I would have railed against such things before. She seemed to be encouraging it. What to make of that?

“This is… weird, right?” She broke the silence.

I cleared my throat trying my damndest not to move, “It certainly is unorthodox.”

“Food?” She guided me back to the task at hand.

“Yes, yes.” I took measured steps toward the kitchen, eyes glued to her. I knew being handled while walking could be a nauseating experience. She seemed fine, if not a bit overwhelmed by the sight of her own home towering around her.

Soon, I found myself before a cutting board, littered with vegetables, Natalie perched upon my bare shoulder. Why was I nervous hefting this kitchen knife? How hard could it possibly be?

“Dice it.” She commanded, matter-of-factly.

“… Mmm, yes, of course… I’m going to… do that… now…” Did I sound as utterly lacking in confidence as I felt?

Rich laughter poured from her small body, “You don’t know what dicing is??? You know property laws dating back to the late 70s, by heart, and you don’t know how to dice a tomato??” She was howling with laughter.

“Well! You make it sound—“ My cheeks flushed as I mumbled.

“Shut up , shut up, shut up, oh my fucking god this is funny. Put me on the cutting board. C’mon, chop, chop, the water’s gonna boil over by the time you get this done.” She was awfully demanding for one so little.

I couldn’t help rolling my eyes. How was she still pulling my strings like a puppet when I was ten times her size? Just because she was small, didn’t mean she still couldn’t find a way to get under my skin. I let her slide out of my loose fist and onto the board with a rotund, ruby red tomato, measuring the majority of her height, placed at its center.

“Okay… Alexander pay attention! You’re gonna cut it in half here.” I did so, seemingly much more nervous about her proximity to the knife in my hand than she appeared to be. “Then put the other half over there for now. Now, cut it along the curve like this.” She gestured broadly, using her whole body to demonstrate her meaning. I’ll admit, even while she was using me as the butt of her joke, her fully embodied commitment was rather endearing. We carried on like this. I managed to cut myself with the knife… twice. She told me it was because I lacked proper form. I wasn’t aware such a thing existed. She had me sautéing and basting and boiling in no time (not without almost constant laughter on her part). At one point she’d tried to convince me to don a frilly apron of hers with garish looking chickens and eggs patterned throughout, citing its convenient front pocket, but I managed to set a boundary on that one. After all, she could no longer force me to wear anything! I sort of relished in that freedom. I tried to ignore the rhinestones of my current pant situation as they sparkled in the oven overhead light.

After a period of pure torment that apparently was cooking, while I wiped sweat from my brow and nursed my cut fingers, we finally, blessedly, sat down to eat. “That was…. altogether unpleasant.” I groaned.

“Really? I had a great time!” She was stuffing her mouth, unapologetically. The action made me smile for some reason.

“Well of course you had a fine experience you didn’t have to do anything.” I teased.

“Dude, if I hadn’t Ratatouille’d the situation we’d be eating char for lunch.” She spat back. I stared at her numbly, “Ratatouille? You know? The Disney movie? With the rat? And the guy? The rat’s a chef?? Not ringin’ any bells for ya?”

“Sounds like a profoundly stupid film.” I was just being honest.

She stuck her tongue out at me. I shook my head.

“Whatever, when we switch back, I’m gonna make you watch a ton of Disney stuff just to laugh as you bitch about it.” She returned to her meal, unbothered by the sentence that hung in the air like a hangman’s noose in my mind’s eye. The food that had tasted heavenly on my tongue, now turned to bitter ash. My complexion waned.

“T-Turn back?” I practically choked on the words.

“Well, yeah. I mean whatever this is, it’s gotta be temporary right? If this was, like, a thing, you’d be hearing about it on the news. I mean, who knows? Maybe this is just one really fucking weird dream. Or we took acid and forgot? I dunno, I’m just saying, it’s not like this is forever….”

I swallowed but tasted nothing, feeling the pulse in my neck quicken. “Natalie, I understand this is…. Much less advantageous for you… but… I can’t go back. I’ve dreamt of nothing more than leading my life with dignity and… respect. I can walk out in the world with both, now.”

She stared at me, blinking once, “I don’t know that it’ll be up to us…” She mumbled under her breath, her words so quiet I had to strain to hear, “But… I… Come on, you know I can’t live like this.” Well, I’ve done it against my will my whole life, what makes you so special? “I mean.. I know it’s not really fair of me to complain to you, of all people, it’s just… I mean, Alexander, I have a family.” A knot stuck in my throat.

“Well, like you said, maybe we’ll have no say in the matter.” I forced a tasteless bite just to avoid the conversation. We didn’t speak for the rest of the meal, both of us suddenly weighed down by our respective heavy consciences, neither of us wanting to lose our autonomy.

Cleaning up was far more successful than the cooking had been, but there was no longer any banter. She sat where I had placed her, atop the microwave. She regarded the things nearby: the loaf of bread, the bag of clementines, a haphazardly re-wrapped portion of a chocolate bar, with utter disgust. All of these things, things that she had once been able to pick up with ease, were now looming over her, like stoic mockeries of her own pitiful size. I was painfully familiar with such a feeling. I felt badly for her, I truly did.

Once the kitchen was spotless, no easy feat given its usual calamitous clutter, I sort of stood there leaning against the counter, unsure what to do next. She was the one to break the silence, “Thanks for cleaning up. This is the best this kitchen’s looked in years…” She was trying her best to offer an olive branch.

“It was nothing. You know, I might be able to help with the rest of the apartment too, if you’ll let me.”

**********************

If I’d felt overwhelmed by cleaning before, the task seemed (and probably was) near to impossible now. I shrugged my shoulders. “My trash heap is your playground, go fuckin’ nuts.” I wasn’t one to turn down free help. As long as this isn’t how it’s always gonna be. Every time the panic-inducing thought slipped in, I chased it away. It’s just for now. It HAS to be just for now. I knew Alexander well enough by now to know that like a mouse with a cookie, giving him a challenge or a puzzle to solve was like a drug. He was beside himself. Was it normal to look at this giant of a man and still think he was laughably adorable?

We whiled away the rest of the afternoon and evening cleaning and reorganizing every nook and cranny. Well, he did most of that. To an absolutely asinine degree. He used a tape measure to make sure each book on the shelf was the same distance from the edge. He organized all my records by genre and release date. He rearranged my plants based on the trajectory of the sun through my windows. He even took the time to meticulously fold every item of clothing I had stuffed in my dresser.

Meanwhile, I managed to find something to entertain myself at each stage. I dug out an old handheld video game system, that had once easily fit between two cupped hands and now was a challenge just to hit the buttons. He chuckled softly at the beeps and tinny music coming from the outdated machine. I marveled at trying to use my computer now stretching on, the size of a movie theater screen. I tried writing my own name with a pencil and paper, only to come away with a page full of graphite squiggles and pretty sore arms.

By the time the work was done, it was well past midnight and we were both exhausted. His bangs pestered his eyes as he collapsed on the floor by the bed, having set me down on the edge, I peered down at him while he caught his breath. He leaned his head back and rolled toward me, peering up at where I sat. Seeing those bright blue eyes gazing up at me over brows and messy curtained hair, I felt my spine straighten. If I squinted, it was almost like he was little again, craning his neck to meet my gaze. His voice warm and all-consuming, broke me of my thoughts.

“Is it time to retire for the night? I, for one, am exhausted and my leg is killing me.” He grumbled, I nodded. I’d forgotten about his unhealed injury. He’d been going without complaint all day and I couldn’t exactly see it from my limited vantage point, I’d forgotten that he was still hurt. “Do you need anything?” I shook my head no. He started for the door, “Goodnight, then—“ Where was he going?

“Wait!” My tone sounded a little too small and needy for my liking. I cleared my throat, “Uh, I mean… Don’t you think we should sleep near each other just, you know, in case?” I saw his lips press into a thin line. Being reminded of the sheer possibility that he could wake up without this new body seemed to distress him greatly, so much so, that I felt guilty for bringing it up. Still, I didn’t want to be left all alone in this giant bed all by myself. Alexander may have loved his personal space, but I kind of wanted to be looked after right now. He nodded curtly, as he took steps towards the bed. He hesitated for a moment, clearly unsure how to make this less intimate than it already clearly was. I shuffled over to the pillow on the opposite side. He did his best to slip under the sheets without disturbing the mattress too much.

Then, much to my fascination and delight, I found myself lying on my side, face to face, eye to eye with him. I reached out and with a chilly hand, pressed my palm into the bridge of his nose. He blinked, while sucking in air. I couldn’t help smiling. “No matter how big you are, you’ll always be my little nightmare…” a smirk curved his lips as his left hand shifted from where it lay on the bed. Slowly, cautiously, a finger tip approached, and very lightly brushed my hair aside. Where his fingertip touched, my skin was abuzz with electricity. My heart skipped a beat and I held my breath. As though he were waking from a dream and suddenly found himself an inch from my body, his eyes widened and he mumbled, “G-goodnight, Natalie” and then promptly rolled over. I shook my head to hide my smile. This poor boy needed to learn it was okay to express feelings other than pure rage.

I rolled over to face him, and speaking to the back of his head, I wished him a goodnight, before drifting off to sleep.

I awoke softly at first, seemingly on my own for no particular reason. I could feel the slight draft of air tickle my body as I shuffled a bit in bed. That’s when I heard it. Almost impossible to place at first, so soft it almost blended with the mechanical drone of the air-conditioning, the sound of someone crying. Not someone, of course, Alexander.

I knew before I even opened my eyes. My heart sank. Feeling a tightening in my own throat, I met the pristine morning light with heavy, sleep-ridden eyelids. Rolling over my shoulder in my perfectly proportioned bed, I saw him, curled up against the farthest corner of my pillow, hunched over, his shoulders hitching with each wracking sob. As I adjusted myself in bed to see him, I watched his spine tense, as he froze, casting a glance behind him. The face I saw was the most pitiable, splotchy and tear-stained countenance of a man who’d lost everything in the stroke of one unexplainable night. When he landed his gaze on me, his eyes brimmed with fresh tears, as he painfully choked out these few words:

“I was so close. I had everything I’ve ever wanted for a day. One pathetic day. And now… I’m… back to nothing.” Without hesitation or self consciousness, he rose to standing and crossed to me, I quickly gathered him in my hands and held him close to my heart. I stroked his trembling shoulders with the pad of my thumb.

“Don’t talk like that. It’s not true.”

He scoffed, pushing himself away from my skin to look me dead in the eye, “Oh really? How should I talk about it then? Shall I rejoice in being dependent on people forever? Shall I jump for joy that I will never be taken seriously? That I have no control over my own destiny? The world is actively hostile to people like me. I’ve no means to self-actualize like this. Not because I’m not capable, but because your society won’t give me the chance. But, no, you’re right, let me see if I can arrange for a fireworks display to celebrate this momentou—“ Gingerly, I placed the pad of my index finger over his lips.

“Hush! Alexander? You aren’t nothing. You’re dead wrong about that. You, my little nightmare, are everything to me. Do you realize I would be flunking out of law school right now if it weren’t for you? Hell, you just spent the last twenty-four hours taking care of me when I needed it most. You inspire me every day to work harder and rise to my fullest potential. And yeah, okay, sure, you may need a little help getting around and you’re never gonna suck less at cooking, I’m sorry to break it to you, but you are brilliant…. And I know I don’t have to tell you that twice. I’m pretty sure you enjoy telling me as often as you can manage. If anyone is going to wrangle life into submission and take control of his own future, it's you. Little or no…” I trailed off as I watched his shoulders rise and fall as he chuckled and shook his head, bitterly. What had I said wrong? My face burned.

“Is that all I am? A pocket-sized aide, turned miniature tutor?” When his gaze returned to mine, his eyes were blazing blue.

“You know that’s not what I meant…”

“Isn’t it though? All you humans care about is what I can do and be for you. How I can entertain you and fulfill some niche set of tasks—“

“Now, hang on. I admit, that was a poor choice of words. But give me a little more credit, here. I’m not like that shitty lawyer you had to put up with from before. I understand empathy and, maybe in spite of your low opinion of me, I can learn from my mistakes, okay?”

He sighed, squirming a bit inside my hand. He cast his gaze askance while he blinked once, twice, three times, considering my argument, “I just… I’m so beleaguered by this approximation of my worth to what duties I perform.” He squeezed the flesh of my palm in frustration.

“I understand that, completely,” I encouraged, while he simply scoffed in response, “Well, I mean I know I don’t get it, exactly, but I can empathize, okay? Stop trying to make me out to be the bad guy when I’m trying, here. I just want you to know that I… I… don’t… you know, I don’t, uh… hate you…” I swallowed hard, suddenly feeling quite flushed, “What I mean is, I’m not out to get you. I’m grateful for all the ways you help me, but I don’t expect it and I’m doing everything I can think of to help you in return. I know you think I’m a fucking idiot, and, I dunno, maybe I am in some ways, but I’m an idiot who’s got your back. You’re not getting rid of me that easily. I’ll still be here even after you piss me off for the five thousandth time this week.” He cracked a ghost of a smile at that. There you are behind that prickly exterior.

“You humans are extremely difficult to train. I hope you can appreciate what an uphill climb it was to even arrive at this destination,” He leaned back, allowing his weight to be supported by my curled fingers, an act of relaxation he almost never indulged in. I felt my heart skip a beat as I felt the warmth of his body ignite the sensitive nerves on my fingertips. He continued, “I suppose I don’t hold you in utter contempt, either. Perhaps having some support won’t be as burdensome and infuriating as I previously hypothesized.” He swept his bangs from his eyes, “While most of your earlier statement was, frankly, offensive, you were correct in your assertion: I am rather brilliant aren’t I?” He flashed me a winning smile and arched his brow.

“Oh fuck off! You’re not guilt tripping me and fishing for compliments at the same time! No, I’m not playing your stupid game! God, you’re such a little nightmare! I mean you’ve been through a lot, I know, but, jeez, Alexander! You don’t know how to turn it off, do you?”

“Even at night, the sun shows itself by the glow of the moon…”

“Oh my fucking god, you’re unbearable! Forget I said anything at all to try and cheer you up. Now I’ve gotta suffer through the consequences of my own actions! Ay, dios mio, what have I done?” I placed the tip of my index finger on his bent, left knee and shook it ever so slightly. Enough to demonstrate my pretend frustration without actually jostling his body.

He was beaming by the time I finished, “I’ll make sure you’re spared when the revolution comes. You turned out to be less wholly insufferable than I’d first surmised, Ms. Marquez.”

“And that’s as close to a compliment as I’m going to get from you, I am sure.” He laughed. I adored that little laugh. “Let’s go back to sleep and ignore the world for a few more hours, how does that sound?”

“Honestly? Rather ideal.”

“May I hold you in my hand for you to rest in?” I felt his hands reflexively tighten on the skin of my palm. He thought for a moment before releasing a breath he had been holding.

“Yes, you may.”

For the first time since I’d known him, he allowed me to hold him closely, head resting on the pad of my finger, as he curled up over my beating heart. As I closed my eyes and began to drift, I heard a muffled voice.

“I suppose I’m really not getting rid of you am I?”

“Not unless you kill me… Wait…Don’t, don’t get any ideas, okay? Somehow of anyone I feel like you could figure out how to kill a human and get away with it.”

He laughed, wriggling to get more comfortable in my featherlight grip, “Hm. I suppose I’ll let you live to see the light of another day…Goodnight, Natalie.” And then, I could have sworn I felt just the smallest amount of pressure and dampness against my finger. Almost as if a pair of tiny lips were kissing it goodnight. But maybe it was just wishful thinking.

After the day we’d had, who knew just what was real anymore?

#What if lady smol and man big?#A Fraction of Justice #oc:alexander #oc:natalie #g/t related #g/t community #g/t au #giant/tiny #g/t writing #size switch au #gt community

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hyunsuks-beanie · 2 years

Text

Matters of the Heart Ep. 3

Pairing: Best friend! Yeonjun x gn. reader

Genre: Fluff; Angst; Maybe eventual smut

Content Warnings: University au!; lots pining; our main leads being stupid; I haven't planned smut for this one, but it might as well turn suggestive. This part is angsty too, but there's quite a bit of fluff thrown in, and a temporary calm too.

Word Count: 2.55k words

Mellow speaks: As promised, here I am!! Thank you for supporting this story up till here, and I hope you guys will like this part and the future ones too, because I have a feeling this is gonna be longer than I had planned (I mean, we're already on chapter three and I haven't even given them the tiniest of sweet bits lol)

Tagging: @sweethyuka @yedamology @enhacolor @axartia @hyunsuksmygod @yogurteume @duolingofanaccount @zurimochi @blahbluhblahbluh @yeonyeonyeonjun @yjs6x @silent--cry @delacyrose224 @rlajjunie @jjunbugg @blue-last-page-514 @bluxjun @yutacchin @zen003xx @yawnzznlvr @foryawnzzn @magicalstudentwhispers

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《Previous Next》

"Why didn't you tell me?"

As soon as the question slips past your lips, it feels as if the air becomes thicker again, Yeonjun's breathing becoming labored or so it seems to him. He doesn't have an answer to that, doesn't know what to say to justify whatever he did. Sure, he did nothing wrong by finding himself a girlfriend (or rather, agreeing to be someone's boyfriend), and he's aware of that.

But what he did do wrong was not telling you, despite claiming that you were his best friend and the one whom he always told everything. What he did do wrong was continue to have feelings for you in heart, even after promising himself that he'll move on. What he did do wrong was smile to himself whenever he watched you fall asleep through FaceTime, his hand itching to run against your cheek like he used to do when you were next to him.

It's his fault for messing up like this, and he knows it. But he also knows that in hindsight, it's not really his fault. Because how can you blame him when all he did was fall in love with you, when all he did was want you to be yours? And how can you blame him for being hurt over and over again by the way you were so adamant on refusing to acknowledge the hints he was dropping, the way you never seemed to bat an eyelash no matter how many times he introduced himself as your boyfriend, no matter how many times he took you out on not-so-discreet dates, and actually called them "dates?"

There's no way on earth you could be so oblivious, is there? It obviously had to mean you didn't feel the same, and your reluctance to say anything was probably for fear of ruining whatever it is that the two of you share......shared. And it was up to him to let go, to learn to back off and not overwhelm you with the adoration he carried inside him, for you. But it was hard, harder than anything he's ever been made to do before. He did try though, really, really did try.

He tried not to let his heart skip a couple of beats every time your face came into view on the screen, that gorgeous smile making him melt. He tried not to miss you so much that it hurt him, and he tried not to.seem too sad whenever you had to cut a call short because you were sleepy. He tried to not make talking to you the highlight of his day, and he tried to fall out of love with you.

Yet, he knew soon enough that it was useless. He just couldn't seem to get you out of his head, no matter the amount of effort he put in. You had become the center of his universe, and cliché as it may sound, his world did revolve around you. Even though it wasn't right, he couldn't stop himself from indulging on your favorite flavor of fro-yo every week, and sending you a picture that said he missed you. He couldn't bring himself to not remind the whole campus that you were his co-host, playing your favorite song as the opening theme of your show every single morning.

That is, until Yena came along. To be fair, he hadn't asked for a new co-host. Heck, he had flat out said he wouldn't accept anyone else as his partner till you came back. And Yena herself wasn't too keen on managing a radio show, because her true expertise lied in managing the entire campus radio. That's right, she had planned on working behind-the-scenes, had wanted to lend Soobin a hand in navigating through the chaos. Instead, she got thrown into the chaos itself, finding it impossible to say no when Soobin was begging for her to come on board.

"It'll just be for about five months," he had said, telling her how Yeonjun's moping had made the whole atmosphere of the show seem much more depressed than it really was. "It'll be fun, I'm sure you'll learn something cool," he had said that too, and though she had her reservations, there was nothing she could do but agree. So agree she did, becoming an intern of sorts under your best friend, learning all there was to learn about being an RJ.

She knew from the get-go that it was only a temporary job, knew that she'd have to step down the moment you came back. It was something that had been drilled into her head, because the morning show had been your brainchild after all, and it wouldn't be too nice a thing to take that away from you, right? Not that Yeonjun would let her take it away from you anyway, given how grumpy he was for the first couple of weeks she was with him.

Had you been there, it would have taken even you a minute to recognize him, his usual bubbly, clingy demeanor having had done a complete one-eighty to give you this bundle of sulk. So it's no surprise that poor Yena was totally clueless about why he being like that, and then it took her another few days to get used to it when he finally started calming down after having realized that he was in the wrong.

It was slow, her journey of breaking down his walls and earning herself the rank of his friend. It had taken him a whole month to get to know his quirks, and then another half a month to come to anticipate them. By the time she had spent two months being his co-host, she already knew she was developing a crush of sorts, and by the last week of the third month, she knew she had to confess.

And to Yeonjun who was already trying to nurse a broken heart and was in dire need of someone who would fix him, her confession had come as a breath of fresh air, something that would give him the energy he would need to move on. So, like an idiot, he had accepted her feelings, and had decided to give himself a chance at dating someone who wasn't you. Like an idiot, yes.

Because in the back of his mind, he already knew this was going to end in disaster. Yet, he went with it, and it wohld be a lie to say that the first two months being Yena's boyfriend weren't nice. She was a lovely person, with a heart of gold and a smile that could brighten up anyone's day if they saw it. And she was just a affectionate as he was, so it was like he had found someone who would accept his hugs and kisses like you used to do.

That's it. "Like you used to do," that's the thought that nudged him every time he tried initiate skinship with Yena (and she, of course, responded with just as much enthusiasm). You were always there, in every thought, in every single thing he did, or even tried to do. He couldn't help it, he couldn't get you out of his head, no matter how much he tried to push those feelings away and replace them with the ones he was supposed to feel for her.

He wanted to tell you, his mind implored him to tell you each and every night, but somehow, the words always just remained at the tip of his tongue, and he couldn't bring himself to say them out loud. "Why?, you might be wondering, but there isn't really much to wonder about. Because how he could he let you know when you were smiling at him like that, how could he possibly bear to make things awkward when you were so proudly how you referred to his photo as "My Yeonjun" when a friend in Australia asked who he was.

No, he just couldn't bring himself to break this bubble you had put him inside, and if given his way, he never would have let you know, even though his heart yelled and screamed at him for doing something so wrong. He was leading Yena on, he knew it. He wasn't over you, not even close, and yet he had promised his heart to her. "I can learn to love her, I just need time," was what he told himself, but even after fast-forwarding to now, to this very moment as you stand there in front of him, waiting for an answer, he knows he still hasn't learnt to do that.

"Well?," your voice cuts through his thoughts, bringing him back to the earth as his eyes meet yours. He doesn't have an answer, he doesn't know what to say to you. He didn't want to go into this discussion in the first place, but he knows he's going to have to say something to you. He needs to come clean, but he's not sure he can do it today. He's not ready to acknowledge the unsaid, and so, he finds himself saying something that would only deepen the crack that's formed.

"I didn't think it was important. I didn't want to tell you."

His words sting, to say the least. They hurt you in a way you've never been hurt before, the feeling that you didnt matter enough to be told about such an important update in his life weighing heavy on you. The tears threaten to spill, your eyes brimming up as you try to hold back a sob. But just when you're about to let one out, you instead find yourself engulfed in a pair of arms, painfully familiar as you sniff in Yeonjun's cologne, the one you had suggested to him, two years ago.

The fragrance makes it difficult to stay focused on the sorrow, a laugh escaping you as you bury your head into his shirt. And Yeonjun knows exactly what to do in that moment, being an expert on consoling a crying you. His arms snake around your form almost effortlessly, his heart hammering against chest as he starts running his hand up and down your back, gentle kisses being placed to your crown as he continuously tells you he's sorry.

You don't know how long you stay like that, the sun evening drawing closer as he never lets go of you, your breathing calming down in bits and pieces till you can see clearly again. "I'm sorry," he whispers yet again, causing you to bite down on your lip before pulling away, your eyes downcast. "Hey, look at-," he begins, out of habit more than anything else, but just when his fingers come in contact with your chin, your words make him recoil, hurt flashing across his own face. "We can't do this anymore, Jjun," is what you say, your voice quivering just a little as you look up, "You have a girlfriend."

"So?," comes his reply, his own voice cracking as he reached out for your arm once more. And this time, you don't push him away, because you can't push him away. "If I remember, having a girlfriend doesn't mean I can't hug my best friend anymore, and it certainly doesn't mean I can't be there for you when you're very clearly on the verge of breaking down."

"Yeah?," you're quick to say, your volume rising with each word you spit out, "And whose fault is it that I'm 'breaking down,' huh? Yours, you jerk! I'm breaking down because you didn't think I was important enough to know you had found someone, because you didn't care enough to even tell me you'd replaced me on the show! Some best friend you are, Choi Yeonjun. Bold of you to even call yourself my best friend when you couldn't even make the time to give me a heads up." "A heads up that you're not mine, that you've never been mine," you want to say, but the syllables die down at the back of your throat as another wave of tears threatens to shake you.

"I'm sorry, okay?," he retorts, nearly yelling himself. "I'm sorry I couldn't bring myself to tell you earlier, I'm sorry I wanted you to be in front of me when I broke the news. I just....I didn't want to make things awkward for us through the screen, and I don't even know why. I just thought that maybe, maybe me telling you that I've got a girlfriend would make your time away from here sour, and that was literally the last thing I wanted to do."

"I know it sounds weird, crazy even, and believe me, I really don't know why such a thought even crossed my head. I should've told you sooner, you should've been the first person to know. And yet, I just couldn't. I wanted to tell you when you were actually in front of me, but obviously, that didn't work out." There's so much more he wants to say, and he knows deep down he's still not being completely honest with you.

Sure, it's true that he did want to tell you in person, but that's because somewhere inside him, he was hoping you'd tell him he can't date anyone else but you, he can't love anyone else but you. Anything that would tell him it was okay that he wasn't able to move on from you, that it was okay he felt this way for you, because you felt the same. But of course, things hadn't gone his way, and now here he is, almost lying to you just so he can hide what he's going through.

You're crying by now, and so is he, your defenses having broken down to the floor. And you know neither of you can't hold back anymore, your bodies falling forward till you're sobbing into each other's arms again, through thick and thin indeed. "I hate you," you whisper, ending in laughter as you hug him tight, the months of being away from each other finally catching up to you.

"I hate myself too," he chuckles, his eyes growing more puffy by the second. You stay like that for what feels like hours, swapping new secrets and exchanging apologies as your hearts feel lighter, the misunderstandings that had brewed getting washed away little by little, till you're left with just the two of you, Yeonjun and Y/N, against the world.

He drops you off at your dorm that evening, the familiar environment of his car making you at ease. As he hugs you bye for the day, you catch him with a smile, waving him off while saying, "Congratulations on getting a girlfriend, Yena seems like a good girl." It does hurt a little, but you're getting used to it. And his reply? A soft "Thank you, yeah. Yeah she is," paired with a smile that somehow lessens the pain he's feeling.

Those are the last words you exchange before he's off to pick Yena up after class, but as you close the door to your room, and as he gets back into his car, the two of you can only pray for things to go well now.

Only time will tell how you fare on that, though.

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iamnotawomanimagod · 4 months

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welp. time to just get this off my chest.

on tumblr it's "support Palestine or you are the scum of the Earth" but literally everywhere I go and everyone else I talk to is spouting the "there's two sides to this" "there are no good guys" rhetoric

so no, I'm not surprised that people who aren't chronically online in the deepest left spaces on the internet support Israel.

does it piss me off? of course it does. do I understand the omnipresent and pervasive nature of Western propaganda and the way very few people in Western culture are interested in confronting that? yeah, I do. is it fucked up that that's a reality in Western/American culture? yeah, it is. do I think screaming and mud-slinging at every person who even slightly suggests that there could be no good answers in this is even remotely productive, useful, or helpful? no. I'm not going to end the war by calling my chronically-ill, dying mother a genocide supporter.

I do not support the genocide and I am part of those that see the absolute need for an immediate ceasefire. I am the only one I know in my offline life that feels this way. My friends and family are all left-leaning.

it's difficult not to see the attitude here on tumblr as virtue signaling. it's also difficult to have any meaningful conversations with the people in my life about Palestine when this issue has been ongoing since before I was born. since before my mom was born. yes, people feel overwhelmed and scared and unsure of what the right thing to do is. that's a very human response to war. it's awful.

I don't think we should stop talking about Palestine. I do think tumblr has distilled this issue down to a single talking point that does not allow for any meaningful conversation to take place with the people who could actually have their minds changed, because if you step even the tiniest bit into the "two sides to every 'conflict'" discourse, you are labeled a supporter of genocide.

even posting this is going to get me some major side-eye, I know that. and yes, I am speaking from a place of enormous privilege, safety, and distance. I know.

I just think of all the other horrific shit going on in our world, every single day, and of how little impact me and my family and friends can actually have on any of it, and then I come on tumblr and every other post is about abhorrent actions taken against people who I cannot help. an absolute deluge of human suffering, graphic violence, and traumatizing images and stories that I can do absolutely nothing about.

geopolitics is not something I've ever had any hope of having significant impact on. it's so so so far above my head. it's so far out of my control. and I'm too sensitive of a little bitch to just keep swallowing the bad news and knowing I can never really fix it or even help in a meaningful way.

I don't want to visit a blog about bears and see images of children crushed under rubble. I don't want my favorite fandom blog to post video of victims waving white flags and being shot down.

who is this actually helping? whose mind is this actually changing, when you're on the "there is ONE side to this and if you think anything even a little bit otherwise, you are Evil" website?

I get two options when I vote. less genocide or more genocide. voting is the only thing I can do to influence my country's politics, and I was going to do it already anyway. my president is 100% culpable in this and he's STILL the better option.

and how people posting on tumblr lowkey do seem to think that they're going to stop the war that way. you aren't. this is a fucking echo chamber, and I know that's true because the moment I step outside of it, the discourse changes completely. you cannot and will not save the world by blogging. people who aren't blogging about it are not contributing to the genocide.

I guess if this is upsetting to you and you think I'm a bad person because I feel this way, you can unfollow me. if you're a mutual, at least soft-block me on the way out.

#rambling about my life #not going to tag this but it's about i/p

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swampgallows · 1 year

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they fucking killed dead my favorite yam guy and like i know i had my period of mourning about it and was very self-conscious for being in my thirties and that invested in a fictional character but the secondary blow of the lawsuit made things even more devastating and there really is just a giant crater of inspiration yawning in my soul now that is almost impossible to scab over. like they are literally never going to make content about him again. there will be crumbs in hearthstone if they dont soft-replace the warrior hero altogether with a more popular alt skin (rokara, varian [!!!], magni, etc.), and maybe in some far-flung return to yrel and the lightforged they might revisit “exarch hellscream”, but that wont be him. it’ll be his au half-brother at best. the character as i know him is dead, double dead, triple dead, permanently dead. defeated in siege, killed in wod, shattered into soul ash in sanctum.

it would be easier if i had something to move on to, but like everything else in my life i have been fossilized in this same corroded rut for almost a fucking decade, spinning my bald wheels in nothing. in fact i thought i’d moved on from wow back in 2009 but went back to it in 2014 because i was backsliding even then, searching for something to lift me out of the rut. it feels like my entire life ive been a stalagmite in some forgotten fissure, a comedone marring the face of an earth, an aberration. a foreign body that should be removed. i am always between things, never enough or always too much. i was not supposed to make it this far. i am not supposed to be here. but i do not know where i am supposed to go, where i fit, where i’m free, where i belong. im a calcification of runoff, a byproduct, a thing of no inherent meaning beyond being a sedentary deposit from something that serves a purpose. not the moss on the stone but the brittle stone held in pieces by the moss, scaffolding for something more important. i am not even the kind of mineral that appreciates over time, no crusty exterior hiding a geode. even i am taken aback just now, about to describe myself as the buildup of filth at the edges of a tub; perhaps a bit too wallowing to outright say i am soap scum.

because of this, i am not sure how i am meant to move on aside from being wiped away when i am not even a thing that gathers dust but the gathered dust itself. as the years go on so does the layer of dead cells, hair, and bug droppings accumulate, crumpled flies in my eyes and cobwebs ropy with dust. “dust to dust”, but it is already here. it is already me.

i envy people who can hyperfixate on things, or even fall a little bit in love when they find something new. the anhedonia has overpowered me for much of my life. i used to interpret this as me having higher standards, which weaves directly into my stellar reputation for being “judgmental”, but i think said standards are so high because, like adhd, it has been a lifetime struggle to eke even the smallest enjoyment out of anything. so this one thing i had, i tore out the pages of his books and gnawed on the pulp, absorbed it into myself, gripped it with white knuckles and harpy talons and boa’s embrace to satiate me, wringing the tiniest drip of nourishment on my sandpaper tongue, only to now find ashes. a starving stupid husk moldering on a windowsill, baking in a shaft of sunlight in hopes of feeling warmth. burnt brittle dust in a haunted house, waiting to be swept away.

#blathering

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anachronistic-falsehood · 8 months

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WHISKEY. TELL ME ABOUT YOUR TRIGUN SONA. GIMME.

OH MY GOD HI. HELLO. i don't know if you noticed but tumblr marked me explicit for like ten minutes for changing my pfp to a minecraft man. i think i'm back tho!!! mac can u see me am i dead??? can u see my pfp??? did they use the revive book on me. do i need 2 make a dramatic speech. this is my sunrise etc etc??? am i still in limbo someone let me know pls

BUT HIIIII HELLO :3 yes yes i have a trigun sona, i never drew them or rly wrote anything down, it was all in my head babey!!!!! did not have a name, but they're a librarian in some small washed up town. nonbinary butch who wears suspenders and has like a whole bunch of different coloured button up shirts and a single well worn pair of cowboy boots with spurs. is obsessed with documenting as much of No Man's Land and Earth's history as possible, or what little history of Earth remained after the crash. fascinated by crime but also deathly afraid of getting caught up in it so even tho they're curious they run in the other direction when literally anything dangerous happens. if u put them in front of vash the stampede they will react like 98 milly n meryl in ep 1, crying shaking whimpering like the tiniest most pathetic little guy ever while still trying 2 ask questions. very silly!!

does drag on the weekends!!! drag king? drag queen? EITHER ONE!!! it depends on the day but they prefer being a king bc heels are a BITCH to walk in. terrible balance. clumsy bitch. great with makeup tho!!! ough ive been writing 2 much dstuck i just about said "their strife specibus is bookkind" goddd. HELP. but yeah they will hit u with a book if startled!!! i need a name for them but my last sona just had the name whiskey anyway. i should name all my sonas after alcohol. chat how do we feel naming this one jack daniels

#whiskey yelling into the void #friend tag :3 #i like that name actually im keepin that #it can b their drag name #i love makin sonas i am just so so bad at naming them

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neteyamsheart123 · 1 year

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Blue and Grey (Part 1)- Kiri x Fem Reader! Human!

Mature: No

Requested: Yes

Fluff: Yes

Angst: maybe, a little bit ;)

Pandora is so much more than the biology and the greed it had portrayed itself as for so long to the sky people. It's so much more than all of it. It's about reading the trails, the tracks of the land, the tiniest scents and sounds. There is this constant flow of energy within everything: the spirits of animals, of the Omatikaya, and the way it all connects with the planet.

That deep connection of the forest resides with the people. I remember Grace talking about that network of energy and how it flows between all living things. She said that all energy is only borrowed and one day it has to be given back, which means, life is a lone from death.

I wrote all of my findings and information I could gather from nearby sources in my journal. As I was sitting on my desk, chewing my pen and thinking about what to write, my attention was suddenly diverted to Norm and Max who were fiddling around the computers.

"What are you doing?"

"Setting up Grace's old logs..." Norm answered, sparing me a glance, "...Jake's kids will be here any minute and his oldest daughter loves to watch Grace."

Jake Sully. The great Toruk Makhto who led a huge war against the sky people, leading Na'vi to their victory. I had heard his stories and how he used to be a past dream walker like us, but his soul was completely transferred to his Avatar through Eywa and now he is a full Na'vi.

Born to two scientists who had ill fates and died during that war, my newborn self was left to Norm and Max to be taken care of. Max told me that Jake used to come and hold me for hours frequently, and how Neytiri, the one who used to resent sky people, would put me to sleep whenever I was too cranky.

Speaking of them, their kids have become my best friends and my only companion on this planet. Growing up together on the planet, even in completely different environments, our friendship remained strong.

And one of them even caught my heart.

Kiri. Jake Sully's eldest adopted daughter, Grace's biological daughter.

Whenever she visits the lab, she is always charming me with her beautiful smile and her green eyes, her sparkly whirlpools of orbs were as deep as the ocean. I was the closest to her, there was no specific reason, at least to her, but it was for me.

I had a crush on Kiri. A huge one I am talking about.

Sometimes, I'd find myself staring at her endlessly, like an idiot as she would keep on telling me stories and great valours of her people and Eywa, the Greath Mother.

Once, Kiri caught me staring at her, and she giggled when I tried to play it cool, her cheeks were a beautiful purple colour as her freckles would glow, like stars shining.

I knew it wasn't possible for me to stay with her the rest of my life, I won't have so much oxygen to survive on. Besides, with Kiri as beautiful and talented she is, she deserves a much better mate than me. I am pretty sure she's not into girls.

Maybe.

"HEY Y/N!" the door slammed open, revealing my friends, Lo'ak's eventful greeting made me drop my pen, "...my Dude where are you?!"

"Can you shut it down, Skxwang!" Kiri hissed, my heart started beating fast as soon as I heard her sweet, lilting voice, "...she's there, look!"

"Y/N!"

I smiled and turned back from my chair to the youngest Sully, Tuk, opening my arms for her hug. She's the cutest Na'vi kid I've seen till now, and the way her golden ambre eyes stared at me with all the admiration she has always melted my heart. I loved how she is so curious about everything on earth and how many questions she conjures up for me to solve them.

"Hey guys!" I smiled at my friends, greeting each of them with a hug. Neteyam's quite a gentleman, he's okay with one sided hug. Lo'ak's a whole different boy, he's very comfortable with me so he doesn't hesitate to squeeze me in both of his strong arms while pressing me to his chest.

And Kiri....

Oh God this girl will be the death of me...

She wraps her arms around me warmly, engulfing me to her chest where I could feel her heart, suddenly beating at a very hard pace, as if a racehorse. Her tail wraps around my calf, the tip of it tickling my inner thigh as I inhaled a sharp breath, gently pulling away before I lose control on myself.

Oh Kiri...

"Come..." I chuckled, holding her hand as she smiled back at me, "...come, everything's ready for you."

We left the boys and little Tuk to explore the lab as me and Kiri went our way to Grace's room, her Avatar was still lying in the incubator filled with liquid. Kiri ran up to the incubator and climbed up on it, her eyes glowing down at Grace with tears brimming in them.

"Hi Ma..." she whispered, as I went out for a while to give her a little space, closing the door behind me.

"How are you feeling, Ma? You are safe with Y/N, I know, she'll always protect you. She's not like those sky demons, she loves us, she loves our land. Ma, you'd have loved her just as I do. I want her to stay with us and me forever, but she hasn't got an Avatar body."

Kiri sighed, smushing her cheek against the glass wall as her eyes trained on Grace's floating figure, her tears slowly dropped on the glass casket.

"I love her, Ma..." she sobbed softly, "...I fell in love with her. I fell in love with a sky person, Mom and Dad perhaps wouldn't agree on being mates with her. It doesn't even matter, Ma, she won't be able to survive here."

She sighed as she wiped her tears away, climbing down and then walking over to the computer, wondering how'd she open it and see her Mum's logs. And that's when I entered, making her look at me and smile.

"Hey Kiri..." I walked over to her, and was about to say something when I noticed her tear-stained cheeks. I frowned and pulled her towards me, cupping her cheeks and I leaned forward to examine her properly for any injuries if she had got.

"Why have you been crying, Kiri?"

｡:.ﾟ☆ﾟ.:｡+ﾟ☆｡:.ﾟﾉﾟ.:｡☆｡:.ﾟ☆ﾟ｡:.ﾟ☆ﾟ.:｡+ﾟ

#Spotify

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poohnotpiku · 2 years

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Chapter4 : Pooh & Sonu

Let us know talk about Sonuuuu…. What do I say about Sonu, my bro, my Bhai? I am sure he is going to be annoyed while proof-reading this one, but I am the ELDEST one and I can say whatever I want to say (or at least I think so)…

Sonu is my baby brother….He is 11 years younger to me in age, but 11 years senior to me in maturity-level….In fact, both he and DeeDee are my seniors when it comes to ‘behaving like adults’.....LOL…Sonu is the stabilizing point when it comes to our Siblings Triangle, and me and DeeDee are after him (all the time) like mother-hens (Inner Pooh: “Bechara Sonu!!!).

I still very clearly remember our first RakshaBandhan together….Sonu was just 14 days on this earth….and me and DeeDee had roamed around local shops looking for the tiniest and softest Rakhis for our new baby bro (love)…From there to now, when Sonu is offering us choices of ‘vape’ or ‘sheesha’ as Rakhi Gift!! LOL….

During childhood days, I was the She-Hulk of the family (Inner Pooh : “Literally Hulk!!”) drowned in her books…DeeDee and Sonu jollied away like twins…yeahhhh…DeeDee was skinny and short in those days…people always confused DeeDee and Sonu to be twins, despite 6yrs of age gap between them :D

When I asked Sonu to do some ‘marketing’ for my blogs, he shares my blog on his Whatsapp status with a comment: “Forced promotion from sister for her newly launched blog..mostly mid-life crisis rants filled with grammatical errors and an overdose of punctuations”….Seriously Sonu Tharoor??? Now you wait and watch!!!!!! And What does DeeDee do? She shares with a comment: “Sister ka blog..Free ka promotion” (grrrrrrrrrrrr)

Anyways, back to Sonu. First thing to remember about Sonu is….never, ever ask him for water…..you would die of thirst but this guy will never get you drinking water….It is not that he does this intentionally, but somehow he forgets all the time…!!!

I very clearly remember two traits of Sonu from his childhood days…He had this weird habit of finding secret places around the house to poop (LOL)….and then we all would do ‘treasure-hunt’ by trying to follow the ‘fragrance’ of his poo!!!...Second irritating habit of his was that he would just throw things out of the window…any damn thing his hands could lay on….he has thrown spoons, plates, toys and even our television’s remote control out from the windows…our nani (mom’s mom) still remembers how 3 years old Sonu threw away her jar of pickles from the 3rd floor of her balcony. Thank God nobody was hurt! (Inner Pooh: “Why didn’t he throw you away??? Then there would have been so much peace in the world….”)

Sonu is very handsome (at least, his sisters think so) if he is not hidden behind those bear-like untidy beard! I am not able to understand his adamance for not getting shaved. I have seen food pieces getting stuck in those jungles….yuckssss….but he would not budge…we tried cajoling, blackmailing, etc but NO SHAVE means NO SHAVE!! Guys were doing this in November (no-shave month), our guy here did this for more than 2 years!!! (By the way, he did cleaned off the long beard recently….BUT….he has kept the mustache…facepalm!!!! Sighhhhhh!!!)

I love giving gyaan (imparting wisdom) to others (Inner Pooh: “Sometimes she gives gyaan on topics on which she has no fucking idea!!!!)….and Sonu hates receiving gyaan….So you can imagine our daily silly arguments….me pushing my gyaan towards him…he throwing it back at me….“main dekh lunga…tum apna kaam dekho” i.e. “I can watch out for myself…you worry about your problems” ….this is the answer we get most the times from him… Gen-Z Kids!!!!!

Everybody loves music (I hope so) but people have different tastes…somehow this point does not enter the thick skull of our Sonu…ROFL….he has a wide-taste in music…he listens to all those rappers and music groups of the 80s and 90s etc etc….it’s good…but…then he forces those songs onto me & DeeDee… “You guys need to listen to this…..” ! When he does this remotely, by sharing on Whatsapp, we are able to ignore….but when he is in the same room…then there is no escapeeee….I have had to listen to many such songs and raps, which I couldn’t even understand and still nod my head along…else Sonu would kill me :P Jokes apart, Sonu has introduced me to artists like Eminem and Linkin Park and I am sincerely thankful to him for this….

A very good point about Sonu is that he knows how to cook (Inner Pooh : “Girls out there, do pay attention….”)…he cannot cook daily food like dal-chawal or rajma or kadhi….but he cooks exotic dishes (DeeDee’s twin…huh) like Pasta, pizza, sandwiches etc, using lots of calorific stuff like cheese, mayonnaise, butter (grrrrrrrr)…His cooking had a big role in my 12kgs weight-gain during the pandemic! (Inner Pooh : “And here we go again…fatso and her weight-issues!! I toh seriously miss those special dinners Sonu cooked…!!”) …Anyways, I too counter-tortured him with my upmas and dhoklas and pohas :P… Sonu makes the best tea in our family…If we want to have good tea, we order only from ‘Sonu Tea Stall’ …LOL

I would like to share a couple of scenes from Pooh & Sonu series. These would give you an idea on how much I piss-off Sonu too, and not just DeeDee :P

Scene1:

By now you guys have a very good idea, how fucked-up my mind is (Inner Pooh: “You are not leaving any other option for them!!”) and here goes another example. Those were the pandemic days and we were locked down in our homes. Me, Sonu and Dad had tough time being confined with one-another, for months at a stretch. Me and Sonu made sure we both had our dinner together while Netflix-ing. When the below incident happened, we were watching ‘Stranger Things’…

Me (looking out of my bedroom window): “Sonu…..you remember that long-haired villainous guy from Stranger Things?”

Sonu (busy in his mobile phone): “Billy?”

Me: “Yeahhh…you know?….there are these two pine trees on the opposite side of the road…”

Sonu (still busy in his phone): “What about them?”

Me: “If you look carefully, it looks as if it’s Billy doing…ahemm…you know…bad stuff…with some girl…”

Inner Pooh: “Old Lady…cannot even use the word sex…”

Sonu (now he is paying attention): “What???? Are you nuts??”

Me: “Arre nahi…you come here and see…”

Sonu (rolling his eyes): “I have no time for your insanity….”

Me (now angry): “I am not mad always…come here….”

Sonu drags himself to the window, looks to where I am pointing, looks back at me, shakes his head and goes back to his room…

Inner Pooh: “See….now you have driven him back to his cage….he was sitting here peacefully….but no…you would not leave him be….”

After 2-3days, Sonu is closing the window of my room…he looks outside….and looks back at me and says…. “You know pooh? Now I cannot unsee THAT….!!!!”

Inner Pooh facepalms!!!!

Even till date, whenever I look outside my bedroom window, I cannot help smiling and remembering the above incident. However, many seasons have passed and leaves have shed….and the scene now looks like a zombie man fucking a zombie horse….but they are still out there!!!

---Scene Ends----

Scene2 :

Those days, when Sonu had this thing to not shave, he also got this bug to not have a hair-cut. He thought he looked a cool-dude with long hair!

Sonu (standing in front of the mirror for more than 10mins or so) : “Pooh…looks like my hair have grown…Isn’t it?”

Me : “Wait…”

Sonu : “Where are you going?”

Me : “I am going to get a magnifying glass…”

Inner Pooh : “Sometimes this lady has a real sense-of-humour…”

Sonu : “What???”

Me : “With naked eyes I do not see any change in length…..but yes….the volume is halved for sure….”

Sonu (pissed-off) : “Forget it…you will not understand….”

Me : “May be I don’t understand….but I know for sure that if you continue like this, very soon you will be as bald as Dad…”

Sonu leaves the room angrily, but I don’t stop pestering him for a hair-cut every now and then :D

---Scene Ends----

We three (i.e. me, DeeDee & Sonu) have such age-gaps that sometimes I feel we belong to three different generations….Gen X, Y & Z….but the best thing about this is, when we talk, we have a buffet of topics. We pile up our plates based on our choices!! Some topics are on all our plates, some on mine & Sonu’s, some on DeeDee’s and Sonu’s and some on mine & DeeDee’s….I mean all combinations…. (this is a confusing stanza…but I am keeping it as I wrote it….digest it guys!!!)

Just like any other parent, I force my aspirations onto Sonu… I am always after him to try getting good job with high salaries (Inner Pooh rolling her eyes…). I am always giving gyaan to not to be satisfied and not to become stagnant in life…AND….this obviously pisses him off….but it angers DeeDee more (Inner Pooh : “DeeDee needs no particular reason to be pissed off anyways…LOL…”), DeeDee says: “Let him live his life the way he wants….let him make his own decisions…”….I agree…but…I am the ELDEST one and I can say whatever I want to say…heheheheheh….

We three (Pooh, DeeDee & Sonu) might have our own lives, but our lives are entwined with one another, for good or for worse! I will keep pestering DeeDee & Sonu….These poor souls have no option but to ‘jhelo-fy’ (endure) me….

More on Sonu in future blogs……. Until next time, Ciao!

P.S.: Happy Raksha Bandhan to all the sisters and brothers out there….enjoyyyy..!!!!

#going crazy #humour #indianstories #just for shits and giggles #stupid i know #just for fun #rakshabandhanspecial #brothersisterlove #poohnotpiku

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justdecadentcollectiondestiny · 2 years

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Okay so I'm watching Hannibal because it's intrigued me for far too long and I am having a lot of Thoughts so I'm going to write them all down here and maybe I'll post it when I'm done with the show who knows

Major spoilers ahead (duh)

First things first, this show is incredibly fucked up, but it's also so brilliantly written that it makes you take notice of/appreciate the fucked-upness even more.

I feel like the show is called Hannibal when, really, Will is the main character because, the way I see it, Hannibal is the one telling us the story. I think we only know what Hannibal knows, but Hannibal knows a whole lot. I can’t think of anything off the top of my head that happens in the show that Hannibal doesn’t know about, that he wasn’t there to witness firsthand, that he couldn’t easily infer given the events that unfold and the information he has, or that nobody told him about after the fact. People tell Hannibal lots of things. They tell him things because they trust him. Will, the main character, trusts Hannibal, and he tells him pretty much everything, but Hannibal doesn't tell Will everything (obviously). He does tell the audience things, but only when he feels like it. There’s a reason that we, the viewer, know things that only Hannibal knows, like that he’s the Chesapeake Ripper, that Will has encephalitis, that he's Hobbs' copycat, etc. All the other characters’ secrets we first learn when Hannibal learns them, like that Mrs. Crawford has cancer or that Abigail really did help her father kill his victims. In addition, since Hannibal is a perfect liar, he's able to fool us as well as the other characters in the story, and reveals the truth to us when he feels it would most benefit the story, like waiting until the end of S1E10 to reveal that he’s the one who killed Dr. Sutcliffe earlier in the episode. It’s almost like an afterthought, like Hannibal saying to us: “Oh, by the way, I think I should mention…” with the tiniest of smiles on his face.

What on earth are Hannibal's intentions with Abigail Hobbs? He's being incredibly manipulative towards her, intentionally ensnaring her in a situation where she feels indebted to and deeply bonded with him. He does everything he can to ensure that she trusts him and that she wants him to trust her. He clearly intends to use her for something later down the road, and it’s something important and big enough that he toys with the idea of killing Will, someone he considers a friend, when he figures out Abigail killed Nicholas Boyle. He's putting so much into this, he has to cash out eventually. When and why will he do it?

I don't like Jack Crawford. As Beverly Katz puts it, the bureau speculates that Jack "pushed [Will] right up to the edge, and now [he's] pushing [himself] right over." The way I see it, it’s more like Jack wound up Will like a wind-up toy, set him right at the edge, and stood back and watched him walk right off. He doesn't care how much damage he does to Will or Will does to himself, he only cares that he's just broken enough to do the job that he's the best at doing.

From the outside, Hannibal seems like the most interesting guy ever. He dresses amazing, the ladder-accessible library is only one of the things that make his office so cool-looking, he draws, he plays harpsichord, he cooks for his friends several times a month, and he cries at operas. I have to keep reminding myself: “self-proclaimed psychopath, serial killer, cannibal” to stop myself from thinking he’s just the coolest guy.

It is pretty much impossible to figure out Hannibal’s motivations about pretty much everything. Does he care about Will or does he not? He claims to worry about him, and does seem to in some ways, but also actively manipulates circumstances that only further his downward spiral. Why the hell does he do any of the things he does? I can only hope we find out eventually.

Re: Hannibal’s intentions with Abigail: Okay turns out it was all just an experiment of curiosity. He wanted to see how much of Abigail’s father was in her, he wanted to see what she would do when pushed to the limit, just because he was curious. Wow. Holy shit. Did I mention this show is fucked up?

And now he’s going to kill her and it’s going to look a hell of a lot like Will did it. What the fuck are you doing, Hannibal?

See, this is where us knowing things that only Hannibal knows is good for storytelling. We know Will didn’t kill Abigail, and even though Hannibal’s making it seem like he thinks he did, we know that he knows what really happened. So then why the fuck is he essentially framing Will- I can’t.

Hannibal crying over Abigail’s death is such a fucked up image holy shit

Okay, the fishing lures confirm it, Hannibal is actively and deliberately framing Will. The question is why? And to what end?

Jeez I remember when Hannibal stopped by Will's house and messed with his fishing lures, although we didn't know what exactly he was doing at the time. That was a while ago. He's been planning this for a long time.

Whoa whoa whoa wait. Is Hannibal… cultivating Will into a partner in crime? Molding him into a killer with the intent to reveal himself as the Chesapeake Ripper and bring them closer together? Hannibal has always said Will has given him an opportunity for friendship. Does he want to make sure Will is so much like him that his reveal is more of a relief than a shock, and that it’ll make him feel a stronger bond with him?

Mm, no, I’m not sure anymore. Will’s too smart for that. He’s starting to figure out who Hannibal is. The question is, what’s that going to change?

Aaaand that’s the end of season one. “Wow”, is all I can say about that. Starting season two tomorrow. I have to. This is why I got hooked on this show almost instantly. It’s almost like I didn’t keep watching because I wanted to, but because I had to. It’s so utterly intriguing that I just have to find out where this is all going. Fuck this show is good.

#p.s. it made me very happy to hear that alana is going to take care of will’s dogs ‘till whenever’#thank you alana #nbc hannibal #hannibal spoilers #hannibal lecter #will graham #dc destiny yells about tv #dc descants #nbc hannibal spoilers #hannibal thoughts

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fromepiximagines · 3 months

Note

If you wanna do another one: 🏕️ with Kenny !! (Either for yourself, for Bug or for both)

🏕 If you met [character], would you get along right off the bat? What would be the first impression of each other that you get? Would it change after you've known each other for a while?

It's time for my selfship to shine - but I'm gonna do both because I LOVE Bug.

For myself: I think it'd take a while to get along with Kenny, because I'm weary of new people (it be the social anxiety); once we actually get to talk to each other, I think we'd be good friends, with a few common interests - remember how he swapped the book with Kristi so they could read a chapter and talk about it? Count me in!

My first impression of Kenny: 'oh no, he's cute and got freckles'

His first impression of me: 'this dude is very quiet'

Yeah, it would change. As I said, it takes me a while but once I open up to someone I can be quite chatty, especially if it's something I'm really fond of (I was the dinosaur and space kid. I'm the math adult); I am also quite protective of people I love, and i'm patient when needed, but it doesn't take much to make me mad - I'm the one person my friends would call if they needed help to fight someone; so, from quiet dude to friend who is very much soft but also a ticking time bomb. My impression of him would also change, because come on - who wouldn't fall in love with this kind, selfless, cute man who is really hot when he gets mad? From cute man to cutest man to ever walk this earth. Cue the cinnabun x hot-headed ship (up to you who's who in this case ;))

Now, for my baby Bug!

At first glance, Kenny thinks they're insane. This person walked up to the diner after sunrise with dirt all over their face and leaves on their mane of a hair (it was so tangled they just gave up on it), a big ass backpack that covered halfway down their thighs and a pet carrier with a chicken, and promptly passed out after seeing him. Just what happened in here?

Bug thinks they're in heaven. They survived the night after a couple of their 'friends' tried to murder them an their pet chicken on some deserted road, saw said friends get torn apart by some monster who had the widest smile they've ever seen on someone's face irl, then hid in a hole like their first night on a new minecraft survival server, clutching the pet carrier with Jellybean as close to their chest as they could. Then, they found a random beat down town with a diner and wow - they're starving, and the snacks on their backpack sound really tempting but real food sounds even better, and is that a cute guy coming out the door? He's cute. Really cute, really tall and- They're out.

They'd get along fine after that - if you count Kenny tolerating Bug's constant googoo eyes and them daydreaming about him as that. They would be friendly, and Bug would make their infatuation obvious - calling him their ray of sunshine, giving him a few of their hidden snacks, and even holding Kenny when he has nightmares - yes, Bug was placed with Kenny, Tian-Chen and Jade (with whom they have a very sibling-like relationship, believe it or not).

Kenny grows to like it eventually - the attention, the care and the way Bug tried to protect him from the tiniest things, that just made his heart beat in a way it hasn't done in a while. Bug is ecstatic as they see the way he's more receptive and open to their affection (still always asking Kenny for permission before doing anything), even getting interested in hanging out with Jellybean - that's when they know they're in love.

KenBug in a nutshell.

Aaaaand, I've written an essay

Thank you for asking!! <333

#once again i am reminded of why i like to write #the delulu always gets a hold of me and i forget everything else :))#epix from #from epix #from (epix)#kenny liu #kenny liu (from)#Bug (from oc)#mel speaks #ask game

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bunnyykissed4u · 4 months

Text

Leo

----LEO-----

How do they feel about people shorter/taller than them?

He'll make fun of you either way. He's short for a guy (5'7) so he especially targets tall people because his own insecurities. But in reality, he actually doesn't care about your height, like at all.

What are they like on social media? (What’s their username, profile pic, etc.)

Depends what account. Bro has four main accounts and eight alts. But his main main he uses for his friends is the absolutely cringy-est, awful thing ever.. "LEO_PimpDaddy" as his username, a pfp of a badly photo-shopped image with abs, yeah, it's BAD. His bio's some stupid quote like "Stop staring, I know I'm hot".

Their sexuality?

Hmm. Bisexual technically but he wayyy leans on girls, so he calls himself straight. Like 80% for girls 20% for boys.

Preferred weather?

40 degrees. That weird stage where autumn is turning into winter and it's cold but just chilly.

What's their sleeping schedule?

Goes to bed at like 7:30 like a child or goes to bed at 4 AM. No in between. Wakes up way too late either way.

Favorite music?

He likes that really bad sigma male music.. Also rap in general. Mostly bad rap, but sometimes he'll have some culture and go for some better songs.

Also, Justin Bieber.

How's their cooking?

Terrible. He can only make hot pockets and bagel bites. Not even toast to be honest. And when he does try to cook, he either gives everyone food poisoning or burns down his oven.

It's movie night, what movie do they pick?

Any bad hallmark Christmas movie. It's July? Too bad. He says he watches it to make fun of it but he loves it too much.

How would they hold up in a pillow war?

Probably starts it in the first place trying to be funny. Very dramatic and pretends like you just murdered his entire family with one smack. Overall, very bad.

Who do they go to for comfort?

His grandma and Heart most commonly. It's not uncommon that he'll go to Rose or Von either, and sometimes, maybe even Kai or Summer.

Something small that they enjoy?

The smell of other people's clothes. Could be anyone's, but he thinks the smell of peoples clothes affect their personality a lot.

How do they feel about physical contact by others?

LOVES it with most people. Especially if the other person is initating it, he just loves attention.

What is enough to bring them to tears?

Anything that's a little sad, honestly. Sobs at the end of every romance movie. Cries at the tiniest bit of physical pain or stress.

Biggest pet peeve?

When his grandma makes salad for dinner and he's forced to eat it. Actually cries.

How well do they take care of themselves?

Decently?? Just the basic stuff. Probably brushes his hair like once a week though.

What’s something they like that may be surprising to others?

It surprises people when he actually likes something good.. Things like the decent hip hop he likes, and sometimes actually theoretical books.

Do they consider others family?

Yup. Heart, Von, Summer? His sisters despite everything. Jason, Kai, Chad? Brothers To the end. All his classmates are his family.

Any bad habits that they have?

Soooo many!! Doesn't brush his hair or makes his bed. Forgets to eat for a whole day and then just binge eats trash before he goes to bed. Says a lot of things that make people uncomfortable because he's dense. And many more..

What’s their idea of a perfect vacation?

Wants to go to Earth, specifically Texas and just eat and drink for a week straight and ride cowboys and shoot people. He thinks America is still the wild west.

Do they get lost easily? Will they ask for directions if they are?

Okay, the only thing he's good at besides roller skating is directions. Really good at understanding maps surprisingly. Probably will ask for help in the most annoying way if he's lost, though.

How well do they accept advice?

Depends, really. Usually pretty well, but if it goes against what he wants even if it's what he needs, he accepts it in the moment but does not follow through without a fight.

How much do they swear?

A lot. Doesn't wanna say fuck because he thinks it's still a no no word. He says every other word a decent amount. Not insane, just moderate.

Do they like being in pictures?

Yes!! He loves attention and does stupid poses to look hot.

Is there anything they’re bad at?

Everything and anything.

What’s their morning schedule?

Wakes up 10 minutes before breakfast starts and runs to school and proceeds to chill with his friends until classes begin.

Any past injuries?

Broke his leg like 8 times in his childhood because of how reckless he can be. Also had a concussion while playing football with Rose.

Something that disgusts them?

Girls farting. Kinda sexist but like if a girl dares to let out a little toot he's gagging. But it's funny when it's dudes.

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fearsome-series · 1 year

Text

Book One [Book Two]

Laura leapt from one bank of the stream to the other, onto the swampy earth by the lake, she sniffed, smelled frogs in the mud, a fish surfacing in the middle of the water, heard the ripples strike the far shore, she…

Knew her pack was nearby, knew it from the rustling in the grass. She lingered a moment in solitude. Under the moon, under the stars, the night, she used to think nights like this were quiet but now she knew better. She knew the rabbits in their burrows and the buzzing dragonflies, she knew the fireflies and the coyote wiggling away underneath a cracked fence that smelled of rusty wire, she knew the raccoons and the owls, she knew the tiniest mouse underfoot and her fellow werewolves, the largest predator in the swamp, pushing down grass and reeds with their every step…

Couldn’t help but howl. Look up to the moon, and howl…

Oh, no.

Laura’s father stared at his blood-drenched daughter with a half-open jaw and all-open eyes. Chilly September wind blew through the open window. Laura shot a glance down at her gray hoodie, now thoroughly stained red. Gef was nowhere in sight.

“Laura!?” Chris cried out.

“Uh…”

“Laura!?!?”

“Sorry, uh…”

“What! How!?”

“I’m...doing fine, dad! Everything’s fine in Laura-land. How about you?” Silence for a couple seconds.

“Fine!? Fine? There’s so much blood! Oh my God, Laura, are you alright?”

Quick, she thought! Think of something. Anything! God! “I...cut myself shaving.”

“Shaving?”

“Uh, yeah. That’s why I can’t wait for, uh, lasers. Y’know. Shooting the hair off my face. But I’m fine.”

“That much blood? You’re really hurt.”

“I, uh…uh…um…uh…I’m a woman, dad.”

“What.”

“I’m…you know…blood…science is amazing.”

“I need to get your mother. And your doctor-”

A wet thud on the bedside table. Laura slammed shut her eyes. She could smell the rabbit’s blood - and the dirty mongoose scurrying through the window after it. Damn it, Gef.

“A present!” he said in his smuggest tone, so pleased with himself.

“Laura! Did that ferret just - what’s…?”

Laura sighed long and hard. “Thanks, Gef.”

She opened her eyes. Chris still frozen. No closer to understanding a thing. Did she have to tell him the truth? She didn’t even know herself.

Howls and the werewolf with the blood-streaked face tackled her to the ground, jaws wide, teeth glistening, hotly slobbering and

“There’s, uh…”

“Laura, I’m gonna go call-”

“Wait.”

another roar and Jessie pounced, she swiped one paw against his face and he broke off and ran into the grass, his face dripping blood

“So you know that animal that bit me in the woods? The one that they saw at the hospital? In Elkhorn? The one mom saw by the library and screamed at? When you were in the park? With the German guy and the guy who offered you a gun?”

Alice and Emily watched as she staggered up, paws outstretched to help her, Emily growling and then looking grateful, so grateful, nuzzling her gently

Chris blinked.

“So it wasn’t a bear, or a wolf. It was, uh, more than that. I mean, uh…” just say it you idiot, she screamed at herself. “It was a werewolf. It was me. It’s a werewolf and it was me by the park and in the hospital and. I’m a werewolf.”

running in the grass so free so fast so much to SEE and a deer bounced up ahead and she chased after it she ran and ran and pounced and

“And this blood isn’t mine! Don’t wor...rry...okay, uh, that may not sound any better. But it isn’t a person’s. It’s a deer. Deer blood. I know we’re vegetarian, but...I didn’t really have any…” She noticed her dad’s face. Utterly blank. Oh no.

she tore in and she knew she shouldn’t she knew the deer hurt she felt it struggle felt it die and she ate it slowly, alone, under moonlight

“I...I need to call the doctor right now,” Chris said gravely, turning to leave. As Chris dashed out the door, Gef jumped on his shoulder, crawling up to stare him straight in the eyes.

“Look! Listen! I am a mongoose who talks! I am three centuries old and I talk! And yet you doubt your daughter?”

“I-”

“Trust your eyes! Your ears!”

Chris stopped. He thought.

“Y’know, I don’t know what’s going on.” Chris started. “But I can’t say no to a talking mongoose in my face.”

“So you believe me?” Laura asked.

“I don’t know,” he said. “But it’s probably the best reason for your daughter to be covered in blood. Uh, you said it was a deer, right?”

“Yeah.”

Chris took a seat at Laura’s desk. “Is there anyone who can...help you with this?”

“You do believe me, right?”

Chris didn’t say anything.

“There are some others. There’s this person, Jessie, who could...they could explain it better.”

“You sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah,” she lied.

“Alright. Who’s Rin-Tiki-Tavi over here?”

“Gef,” Gef hissed. “I’m -”

“He’s helping.”

“Ah,” Chris said simply, starting at Gef. “He's staying long?”

“No, only a couple days.”

“Can he promise to not bring home any more blood or...rabbits?”

“I can. And Jessie’ll talk to you later…”

“Yeah. I want to meet this Jessie.”

“Thanks, dad.”

He moved in to give her a hug; she accepted it. He walked over to the doorway, grabbed the knob, winced, wiped streaks of red off his hand onto his shirt, and opened the door and went outside.

-------------------------------------------------

“Hey, Gef?” asked Laura, trying to find a place for her blood-stained hoodie. Pile of dirty clothes…no, that just makes it bloody…laundry…nope, blood still gets everywhere…she finally shoved it in the trash. Wait, no, then the cops might…

“Yes?” He said, perched on her table, not aiding one iota.

“Get out!”

“Oh? What’s this about?”

“No more rabbits! You promised me! And since you broke that promise, I get to tell you to get out.”

“I didn’t break my promise.”

“What? Yeah, you did.”

“No - never!”

“Liar! Get out!”

“I promised not to give you any more rabbits. That one was for your father.”

“...really?”

“Yes. A man of his word, I am.”

“Okay. No more rabbits for anyone then. Ever. Promise?”

“Promise.”

“Good. Now go...dig up a worm or something. You freak.”

“I have to observe you!”

“Yeah, about that. Aren’t you supposed to go back to Eliza today? And who’s Eliza anyway?”

“Hmm, I’m no happier about my stay being extended -”

“Now go dig up a worm!”

“Hmph!”

Gef scurried out the window. She slammed it after him. With all that out of the way, she needed to get ready for the day. Ignoring the dank smell of iron-rich blood in the corner, she opted to go more girly for the first time in a while. She usually wore hoodies, partially out of laziness, but also to blend in - become unremarkable. No one at King High knew her as anything but Laura, but she still had some anxiety about being so openly trans. But hey - she didn’t exactly wake up subtle and unremarkable, so why start now?

She picked out a dark gray skirt, denim jacket, black t-shirt and green choker necklace. Taptaptap. Gef at the window. Do I have to open it? Laura did, and then flopped on her bed. Checked her phone. Wait. Wiped the blood off her phone.

They were staring at her in the van oh god they were asking why -

Laura sighed. “You know what, Gef? Thanks. Without you, dad would’ve thought I was a serial killer or something.”

“You’re welcome.”

“I mean, dad was right. A mongoose yelling in your ear is kinda hard to say no to.”

“Hmm, yes. Again, welcome.”

“He may be deaf now, and scarred for life, but hey, he believes. So...thanks.”

“You’re still welcome.”

“Have you had to do that a lot? Like, explain this shit to people?”

Gef paused. Then he spoke simply. “No, not really.”

-------------------------------------------------

Laura walked out to the kitchen, where her dad was making something and her mom Heather was venting about work.

“You decided if you can make it to the play?” Chris asked.

“Doesn’t look like it, unfortunately,” mom replied. “There’s a special session tonight.”

“Aren’t they going to end it in two seconds?”

“Yes, but they’re making us do live coverage anyway…”

“Hey, mom,” Laura took a seat, rubbing her eyes.

“Good morning, Laura. Chris is making...what are you making?” She sniffed. “What is that?”

“Uh, sausage,” her dad explained.

“Sausage? Meat sausage? Sausage from an animal killed for its meat?”

“The doctor said Laura needs to eat meat for now, remember?”

“Oh. Oh, yes, she did. That reminds me, Laura, can I talk to you in the living room?”

“Uh...okay.” Laura followed Heather into the living room, her mind racing through everything it could be. She knows. She saw the blood. She saw me sneak in. She knows.

“How are you feeling?”

“Uh, alright? Considering everything, I’m alright.”

“I’m happy you’re better, but you don’t seem like someone who nearly...whatever you need us to do. No matter what it takes. You staying at the hospital overnight, or even bringing meat into the house. Whatever it takes, Laura. But you have to be honest with us.”

“When wasn’t I honest?”

“I don’t know. I was worried last night, when you went to bed early. You seemed so quiet. But…I’m not accusing you of anything, I’m just saying I want to know what’s going on, okay? You can always tell me.”

“It’s okay, mom. I know?”

Heather quickly hugged Laura, who was relieved that she was happy - and that she didn’t want to know more.

-------------------------------------------------

Alice looked over at her house. At the one-story home, sandwiched between others on a quiet lane. At the IN THIS HOUSE WE BELIEVE… sign on the lawn to the left of theirs, and the RON JOHNSON ‘22 sign on her lawn. Time to go home…

“Are you okay, Alice?” It was Emily’s mom, Rebecca, a dwarf - do they say dwarf anymore? Alice didn’t know - shorter than her daughter, and well shorter than Alice.

“Yeah,” she said. “Need to go home, anyway.”

“Remember, if you want to hang out at our house or at Wulver, we’ll vouch for you.”

“I know. But I should get back,” she nodded towards Emily, and opened the door.

“See you at school.” Emily waved, her mom drove off, and…

Alice walked in her door. Her parents Kevin and Ruth were already up, and making breakfast, eating not at the table, but huddled with her little brother Cody by the TV, watching…

“The liberal media’s not telling you the truth about Hunter Biden’s laptop…”

“...hi?” She called ahead. She took another step in.

“Next up, when this small town’s library tried to start a drag queen story hour, the people fought…”

“Hi. Mom, dad, Cody.”

“Alice!” Her mom said. “How was your sleepover at Emily’s?”

“Oh, it was…it was fine.”

“We really should meet her family sometime,” her dad said.

Please don’t, she thought. “Sure, yeah…”

“Could you check on your brother?”

“Of course…” She looked back at Cody, eyes glued to the TV, plate of half-eaten bacon and eggs in front of him; and then she went into the baby’s room. Her littler brother, Kyle, let off one cry. Alice sniffed the air and gagged, but she picked him up anyway. “There, there…” She looked through a crack in the door at Kyle’s parents. “There, there…”

-------------------------------------------------

Emily quickly exited the car.

“Emily -”

“Gotta get ready for school,” she said, fumbling for her keys.

Rebecca was a foot shorter than Emily, and taught elementary school; whenever Emily saw her in her classroom, she blended in with her kids. She ascended the steps after her, jumped by, and unlocked the door. “It is late, huh?”

“Yeah.” As Emily walked in, she could see that her other mom, Bethany, had already left for work at the college. “I’ll heat up something for breakfast before I get on the bus.”

“Okay, just make sure you eat something.”

“I’ll remember, mom.” She wouldn’t; she shut her bedroom door behind her.

She picked up her bag, sat it down on her bed, started to rifle through it…

Who was that werewolf last night? The feral one. The pack had met one before, about a year ago, but could it be the same one?

Could it be…?

Emily rifled through her vinyl collection, not looking for something to play but just to do something with her hands. Sigh. What if they aren’t an urban legend after all. What if they are. What if…what was that old meme…what if the world was made of pudding? So stupid. She laughed at the stupid joke her own brain dredged up from its depths.

-------------------------------------------------

As Manuel made his way to the bus stop, his head was lively with debate about the events that happened the other day, such as: is Laura really a werewolf? Are Emily and Emily’s friend werewolves? Are werewolves really real? What does Laura’s fur look like? What do Laura’s claws look like? Does Laura have a tail when she’s a werewolf? Is Laura crazy? Am I crazy too and did she make me crazy?

He had watched the news last night with his family, and they talked about how they had caught the coyote that had attacked a police officer in the hospital in Elkhorn, and a coyote seemed like a potential not-a-manwolf (not-a-womanwolf?). But Laura swore she was a werewolf, so…

So, so, so. Soso. Manuel sat crisscross on the sidewalk with his hands on his chin and waited for the bus.

-------------------------------------------------

Alice slung her backpack over her shoulders; as she did, her mom walked into the room, arms crossed.

“Alice, I have something I need to ask you.”

She let her geometry textbook fall back onto the bed. “Yeah, mom?”

“Do you know anything about...animal people?”

Animal...animal people. Animal people. They know. Oh, geeze, they know. “Um, I don’t know what you mean, mom.”

“Does your school have…” Ruth looked deep in thought for a moment. “Furries?”

“Furries…?”

“Anyone who wears tails and ears, and make teachers call them animals. Anyone who uses a litter box instead of a toilet?”

The heck is she talking about? “Um, I haven’t seen anything like that.”

“If you ever do, tell us straight away. I can’t believe what they’re doing to our schools.” Ruth clucked her tongue. “Do you ever get frustrated that we can’t homeschool you? Or afford to send you somewhere private?”

“I don’t get frustrated about that, mom. I understand.” Alice weighed the options, and decided to pick up her textbook and file it away in her bag again. “I know you and dad work real hard to keep us where we are.”

“If only we didn’t have to move away from home,” Ruth sighed. “But God willing, things’ll work out soon enough…”

-------------------------------------------------

Smelled him.

Smelled him smelled him smelled him. What they wanted. What they needed. What they wanted was the smell.

He stood by the blue post. He was looking at his...his...his slab. His little lights.

Yes he was there – yes he was right there where its teeth could get him – yes he was right there where its teeth could…

Sniff sniff.

Not him. Retch. Not him.

No teeth. Not now. Not...now.

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