#i know it's tmi too

[rosekasa]

i think what i adore about ladynoir beyond high school age (18 and over) is the opportunity it leaves for some of the most DELICIOUS best friends to lovers scenarios. because, like, two people who've been fighting side by side for years? who've known each other long enough to make jokes about it, haha remember when we were fourteen and you-- we AGREED to never speak of it!!!! who've spent so long learning each other inside out, even, in chat noir's case, getting over feelings, that the idea of anything romantic between them is so far off the radar that they don't feel the need for certain boundaries, because why would it matter if they made jokes about how attractive they find each other, about getting married, about how they could totally mess with the rest of the miracle team by pretending they're hooking up because it's so far out of the realm of possibility.

but then there would be that imperceptible shift. the moment where one of them makes a joke and it feels just a bit more loaded than it should. gazes lingering where they never lingered and playful smiles turning curious. the sudden awareness that, while maybe they were cuddling on a rooftop with their best friend, they were also wrapped up in the arms of someone they trust with their lives, and is extremely attractive, and, wait, if the only reason it was platonic before was because there were no feelings, what does THIS mean?

THE TENSION. THE PINING. THE INHERENT MESS OF BEING IN YOUR TWENTIES. PLEASEEEE

#as i go through more things in life i ache for ladynoir to experience it too #i want them to be at a grocery store and for him to reach out to tickle her and she turns around and makes a joke but their gazes linger way #too knowingly #i want them to sit down and have a 'okay like this is so tmi but isnt the concept of sex so weird??' conversation #i want them to joke about starting a podcast together #make impulsive amazon purchases that make no sense #find a song that one of them hate and then continuously play it on loop #compare spotify profiles and one of them steals the other's login to sabotage their spotify wrapped for the year #do you know i am so normal about ladynoir #♡alizeh talks♡ #tagged:ladynoir

[roitaminnah]

various unfinished sketches part one,,, besties I am so burnt out I wish I could draw more sob emoji,, my little buttsoup heart is crying to draw

#roi draws #sketchbook #i honestly don't know where I was going with some of these help #second one... um I think it was going to be diya and akarsha making a heart around noelle but then I was like no noelle is not that short s #i swapped it out for min but then um. I was like wait is that in character (possibly but min would be more enthusiastic if diya was involve #anyways. I have a pinterest board called yuri time and I have been forcing myself to try and draw from references on there #because i am on too many mood stabilizers and I will do anything to feel an ounce of joy. hashtag tmi

[greeneyedvamp]

I saw a post the other day wishing there were more queer ships with characters who are good people, and began thinking about why I'm drawn to queer characters who do fucked up shit instead. tw: internalized homophobia

My family and friends, to whom I've been out for a couple of years, have mostly been accepting and nice. However, I can't easily discuss my queerness with anyone in my life because it is entirely centered around masturbation and sexual arousal. I don't have crushes, I don't date and don't particularly want to, I've never had sex and I doubt I'll ever build a family the way my relatives seem to expect. As a result, I tend to see myself as a pervert whenever I'm attracted to someone irl, and I avoid mentioning that I'm gay to people who don't already know for fear of either being perceived as a freak or as fake because I have nothing to show for it.

Romantic queer fluff to me can feel good at first, but often eventually transforms into fomo and self-loathing for not fitting into the story: not experiencing romantic feelings the way the characters seem to, having poor social skills and not looking the part.

But within stories (and fandoms) like Hannibal that feature queer love that doesn't fall within the mainstream framework of romance or ethics, set on a background of murder, I find every corner of my mind to be acceptable and true. They provide me with a vast alternative mental space to engage with, discover or observe aspects of my psyche (not limited to queerness, as the need to single it out vanishes, though it remains inherent), free of the need to mold myself into a predetermined image. In relation to this media, the secrecy is reframed from that of alienation to that of uniqueness, and with narratives to fall back on, I feel more able to face the world.

The following screenshots also articulate my feelings wonderfully:

#tmi #this has been in my drafts for a while and i've been staring a it way too long to know if it communicates what i want it to #so might edit later #this feeling intensely lasted for about two weeks until my attention shifted to other things but i think it will come back when i need it t #this applies differently to the tagged shows and texts not a one-size-fits-all explanation necessarily #nbc hannibal #hannibal #these violent delights #micah nemerever #anactoria #algernon charles swinburne #saltburn #wwdits #tw internalized homophobia

[mokeonn]

One of my favorite things about being in my early 20s is that I'm starting to understand that I can use things not for their intended purpose. When you're growing up, you get told what an object is and what its intended purpose is, and as a kid/teen, I just accepted all of it at face value. As a young adult it's finally clicking that I can simply do things a different way if it makes me happier. Sure, I was taught that you stand to take a shower, but there's nothing stopping me from just sitting if I don't feel like it, ya know? I might have always had my medication in the kitchen, but if I'm no longer remembering to take it, I can just move it somewhere where I can remember. You don't have to specifically store all food in the kitchen, you can have a little snack cart or snack station in another room.

The downside to finding out the various ways you can use objects is that you develop habits that would probably go on an r/relationships post where everyone says you're a little freak.

#simon says #i just developed a new habit (it's too tmi to put here) and I just know that it's some weird shit #it works and it makes me feel better so I'm gonna keep doing it #but it's some shit that would end up viral where everyone would go 'yo op you should break up with them thats weird' 😔 #i was just thinking about this though because every week or so I learn that I can just do what I want #because there's no fucking object use police I can do what I want #i HIGHLY suggest getting into this habit. if you find something annoying or frustrating you can just do it differently #'I hate washing the dishes because my legs hurt from standing for so long' you can bring a chair and sit or you can break it up into chunks #like on the one hand I'm learning this because I have autism and a plethora of other mental disorders #and it's FINALLY clicking that I can self accommodate whenever and however I so please #I'm just sorta learning that if doing something makes me feel better/happy/gets the job done to do that thing #even if it requires using an object in an odd way #hell there's even some little things I've been playing with #for example: my whole life we sorta just lifted blinds only about halfway up #just sorta how we did it ya know #well recently I decided I wanted more natural light in the sunroom/my office so I wouldn't have to turn on the lamp #and I lifted the blinds all the way up to the very top #and honestly?? it fucking rules. the room looks nicer; i get natural light; i can see the forest out back and it's quite calming and nice #like for ages I just never thought about doing that because it just never occurred to me that I could #i just always put blinds about halfway up because that's about how high blinds do in my household #another little one I learned is that I can just... wash my hair #sometimes when I get too depressed or if my body doesn't need a shower but my hair is greasy #I just shove my head under the bathtub facet and wash my hair #it's just a small thing but for years if my hair needed to be washed I would just take a full shower #now I just fix my greasy hair. bc greasy hair is a huge ick for me but sometimes my body is still clean or im too tired to fully shower #like there's nothing stopping me from doing that and it doesn't hurt anyone. it's just a way of bathing that I wasn't taught #but yeah those are some recent examples of me learning I can just... do stuff differently #the free will is kicking in babes and it has decided I love finding ways to use things differently #it's why im doing a bg3 run where I just press loot all no matter what and use whatever I can in odd ways #anyways I might delete this later might not who knows

[devondespresso]

on the topic of stobin having No Boundaries and because i recently had to experience my period after several months of blissful non-period-ness (healthily and intentionally i promise im not like severely-not-ok):

my lovely only child robin in a household where the women presumably outnumber the man moving in with steve after everything and just. forgetting to take her bloodied panties out of the bathroom sink (the most convenient place to let them soak in cold water before throwing them in the wash) (im hoping to fuckin god here that this is a universal afab experience and not just a me-and-my-sibling-are-strange-fucks thing)

it takes two, mayyybe 3 instances before steves just completely unbothered. hes washed (his own!!) blood out of plenty of clothes at this point and has seen way more gruesome shit than organ lining that at least supposed to leave the body so despite being an amab only child he Does Not Give A Shit. at first he'll just casually remind her its there with that type of euphemism Me and The Girls™ enjoy using to make it sound badass ("Robbie you've got a crime scene left in the bathroom" "sorry ill get it before the police arrive") but after a while it becomes a definitely normal thing so sometimes when robins having a rough week he'll clean it up real quick and not mention it, because after all its just blood and at least no one has to go to the hospital for it this time

#tw blo0d #cw blood #cw periods #tagged blood but its just about periods but also just to he safe #stranger things #steve harrington #platonic stobin #robin buckley #platonic with a capital p #platonic soulmates stobin #maybe im just crazy but when i do occasionally get my period i use reusable pads and just. wash them in the sink #just with my bare hands. i don't know how weird that is or if im just being dramatic but i used to not be able to and now i just do #like its just blood but its also Definitely Not *Just* Blood in there y'know. theres A Texture too. #idk im so so sorry this is probably really weird and tmi im just hoping the little gay people in my phone don't think its too weird #devon thinks sometimes

[gravehags]

also finally scheduled my pap smear that i’ve been putting off for [looks at calendar] 6 months. i fucking loathe that shit like if you can get one and it doesn’t hurt you…just know that i hate your ass deeply. well not really but i am massively jealous.

#i suffer from pussy too tight disease. gripper too damn grippy. #not tagging this tmi because we all know that doesn’t exist on this blog

[adraughtofamortentia]

I'm about 4 days away from submitting my research paper and finishing my masters degree 😭

i officially applied to graduate and everything!this has been the hardest 3 yrs of my life and completing this paper has been the bane of existence. it's actually terrifying to think about life post degree (I'm on my 3rd degree and have been in uni over 10 years straight). I have faced some of my toughest challenges during the course of this degree and have learnt lessons that can only be learned in hindsight. the mental health journey has been rough but really that's a whole other post. as I said, my toughest challenges.

I actually can't picture life outside of school but the thought of not having the 24/7 existential dread of homework has been keeping me going

when I finally submit I'm either going to hermit for at least 2 months or going straight to the club 💜

#rambles #i havent talked too much abt my life these last few years lmao #but huge milestone coming up #i dont wanna jinx anything #but at this point im so close its happening #my program is suppose to be a year and half and it took me 3 :) so that should give u an idea :) #theres actually so much else i wanna say about my experiences but it feels tmi lmao #is this tmi? #do people know im on my 2nd masters?? #whats that post if ur thinking about grad school actually just lay down and take a nap? yeah that do that instead trust #also school over rona sucked lets not leave that out

[xmcu-fietro]

anyone know any tips for hacking into that sweet adhd hyperfocused state of mind when you’re depressed and apathetic about life 🙃

#like actually. does anyone know how I can feel that fun hyperfixation buzz in my brain when my dopamine is this low #because this isn’t very fun #and it’s really affecting me #turns out it’s bad to not care about your own well-being. who knew!! /s #tw: suicidal thoughts #not trying to be TMI or get too dark or anything but honestly I just don’t really want to be here? and I’ve felt this way before so I’ll be #fine but it still sucks. I just don’t understand what the point of me being here is #and I know this level of apathy isn’t logical because there are objectively good things about my life but it all feels so pointless #I just feel so defeated that I’ve had years of meds and therapy and I STILL struggle this much #I don’t get what my purpose is beyond ‘getting better’/coping w disability and I don’t get why I’m here #not sure why I’m sharing this much on tumblr. I’m definitely going to feel awkward/embarrassed about this later #actually adhd #adhd #hyperfocus #hyperfixation #fietro’s personal posts

[kirby-the-gorb]

I just bought myself a manga about the artist going through severe illness and I found it comforting to read someone else's experience, so I thought maybe I would share a little about my experience with MCAS again. so here's all the pills I take!

cromolyn. 2 ampules mixed with water 4x/day (although I'm often out of bed for 12 hours or less and have trouble keeping track of time, so often it's 3x instead). mast cell stabilizer.

multivitamin. I only took this for a week so far and stopped to gather data. (my paranoia was getting bad, which often means I'm reacting to a med. this is a cheap one with many fillers.) meant to make up for difficulty accessing food and possible malabsorption.

fludrocortisone. 2 pills a day. for POTS.

atenolol. 1 per day. also for POTS.

montelukast. 1 per day. technically for asthma, but works by blocking one of the signals the mast cells send.

loratadine (aka claritin). 1 pill 2x/day, which we had to fight the insurance about after a while. antihistamine, meant to prevent anaphylaxis by blocking a different mast cell signal.

aspirin. 2 pills 2x/day. to reduce inflammation and control chronic pain.

whichever oral hormonal birth control my insurance will give me (it varies). 1 per day. menstruation makes my MCAS flare and I still have incomplete cessation even after an ablation, so I keep taking it even when not putting myself at risk of pregnancy.

dye-free diphenhydramine (aka benadryl). another antihistamine, taken when my MCAS flares to reduce or completely end the symptoms. (the pink dye in the regular formulation is actually a very common trigger.)

low-dose prednisone. steroid kept on hand for unavoidably high-demand occasions (like moving across the country) or unshakable prolonged flares (like, a week).

that's 8 pills in the morning, 3-4 at night, 8 ampules in the day, and 2 different emergency meds. plus I try to drink a gatorlyte every day (also good for POTS and certain mineral shortages) and try to avoid triggers (including heat, stress, and overexertion -n- )

3 and 4 were the first meds that ever made me feel any better, before we'd figured out it was MCAS. (likely with secondary POTS/EDS.) 6 and 7 are the first line treatment for MCAS, they're the first medications I actually took *for* it. they are often used in combination with famotidine (aka pepcid) but that made my paranoia super bad so I stopped taking that one.

this was my regimen established before I got covid last july, which made my MCAS much worse, which also made it impossible to get a new doc post-move since I can't physically get to an appt. so this is likely to change once I have medical care again. being sick is a lot of work!

#kirby #daily kirby #my art #digital #hal laboratory #nintendo #chronic illness #mcas #tmi #long post #ask to tag #(the manga was 'I'm a terminal cancer patient but I'm fine' btw) #(I don't have cancer as far as we know! and my illness wouldn't be qualified as terminal!) #(it's a chronic illness that's gotten pretty severe and has the potential to be fatal tho.) #(thebibliosphere has mcas too and she spent much of 2019 at death's door before she finally got knowledgeable care just in time.) #(at least I think it was 2019. I can't remember for sure.) #(anyway 'terminal' is a squishy and suspect category - even the mangaka says in the afterword she's stopped using it) #(cuz at time of publication she'd gone into remission! very exciting for her :> ) #(she did unfortunately pass away a couple months ago but. such is life.) #(it can still be a nice book ending even if it didn't last.) #(also yes. my christmas tree is still up in february. I've Been Very Ill.) #(I've gotten all the ornaments off (over the course of a week) and I just have to take off the colored lights and disassemble it.) #(I've been using it for ambient light in the living room because I was really photosensitive for a few months.) #(it's not as bad now but I still prefer diffuse light for sure.) #favorites

[seonghwacore]

cus yeosang's cavities wont get him into a dating scandal but driving license will. if you still dont know, the long, old, trad indication around that in kpop bud 🫳🫳

#ann.txt #oh for context: someone on twt posted abt how yeo talked in details abt his teeth-brushing routine and tmi abt that but #think its too much to reveal abt his driving license #bud if i was yeo id never tell the world abt that #cus why tf would i want crazy ass journalists sneaking around my schedules wanting to know where i go with my rented car #announcing driving license = opening a gate for stalkers and dispatch to track down my off-work schedule #no hate op justbgiving u my two cents

[ladsofsorrow24]

can't i find something good about sasunaru without sakura or hinata-bashing...

kishimoto really done fucked up with the whole marriage thing, because these girls don't deserve this much hate, dude

#like i think if it wasn't for the whole marriage thing #people will hate sakura and hinata less #personally i just feel bad for them #they can be so much more but kishimoto fucked up real bad when writing them and their relationship to the main characters #like... they can exist as important characters without being a love interest you know? #and kishimoto actually have written pretty damn interesting female characters too #my favorite is kushina #she's got so much personality and her story #although pretty typical is totally understandable for a woman existing in turbulent times #but i might have to give credit to her wife rather than him #because he did say kushina's plot is her contribution so #yeah kishimoto is just... shit at writing female characters i guess #tmi tag

[nikatyler]

Concept: Vampire who camouflages his blood packs in baby food packaging like this

#yes that's my very adult snack #but i mean. what if. what if i have blood in it too #tmi but when i had my wisdom teeth removed on friday #my mouth was full of blood all day #and i thought to myself eh i could get used to this #well later in the evening my stomach started feeling heavy and just ew overall so maybe not lol #but if i ever have to survive on blood i know where i'll put it #nika rambles #look i'm fully embracing the vampire weirdo in me. i am cringe but i am free cringe is dead et cetera et cetera