#i want to do more illustrations and paintings this year (this year is almost over) listen

[asterparfait]

old oz that i guess i never posted here???

#oz vessalius #pandora hearts #oz vessalius fanart #pandora hearts fanart #fanart #my art #i want to do more illustrations and paintings this year (this year is almost over) listen #i really went to reblog this and couldnt find it in my oz tag help

[solara-bean]

Death x Halloween Costume Red Riding Hood! Reader

( Reader is an artist/writer with extreme burnout )

( I really tried not to write this oneshot but goddammit he's got me intrigued 😫)

Halloween in Far Far Away was always a blast. Townsfolk filling the streets in their best tailored costumes, kids running about with candy and on the hunt for more. The weather was always the perfect temperature, too, with just enough chill in the air to wear heavily layered costumes without too much of a sweat. Which is why Y/n had adorned a long, beautiful, bright red hooded cloak over a simple, yet regal outfit. Unfortunately, their perfect look couldn't mask how shitty they felt.

For the past decade or so, they'd been one of the kingdom's most renowned creatives. Their works ranged from colorful illustrations, kids books, paintings, murals, YA novels and a few spicier adult novels that got much popularity to their embarrassment.

Needless to say they were a jack of many trades, and yet they've been able to create nothing for the past year and a half. Everyone had figured that the great artist was just taking a well needed break. Which was true for five months until they tried to make something and nothing happened. No spark. No idea. Nothing happened no matter what they tried or what medium they attempted to mold into something new and exciting.

It eventually lead to a depression that left them barley leaving the house, vowing not to do anything fun until they got an idea. Well until their entire friend group dragged them to this tavern's Halloween party in a costume that one of them conveniently had in their size. Yeah this was definitely a premeditated scheme to get their groove back. And as much as Y/n appreciated that they couldn't find the energy to leave the bar and join everyone else drunkenly dancing and singing on the dance floor.

Y/n sat in a big heap of silken red on the barstool looking down into their glass of Victorian Orphan Tears, a fruity drink made specifically for the holiday. They kept pondering on where their magic had gone. Had they used themselves up? Was this the end of their career? Would they have nothing else to show the world before they died?!

A few of their own tears were about to join the orphan's when they heard a soft whistle amongst the tavern band's melodies. Confused, they blearily glanced at their side to see a large, darkly hooded figure. They would've flinched if they had the energy to. No one had sat next to them all night due to the gloomy aura they'd been emitting. Yet here sat a mysterious stranger, who soon turned upon sensing their gaze, whistling halted. Y/n was met with the face of a white wolf. Wolves weren't uncommon in their society but something about those eyes jarred them. Those rich, blood red eyes. So bright that their costume couldn't dare be called red ever again. Y/n wasn't aware that they'd been locked in long moments of eye contact until the wolf leaned close enough that their noses almost touched. He made a soft but audible sniff.

" Mmm that smell..."

Y/n shivered at hearing the wolf's deep, gravely voice. It was all they could hear as if they weren't in a large room full of party-goers.

"...So sweet..."

"I..uh..what???" Y/n managed to mutter, slowly but surely pulling themselves back to the present reality, but the world aside from the wolf still remained blurry.

" Your drink."

They blinked. " Huh?"

" Your drink." He pointed at their glass. " It smells amazing. What is it?"

" Oh...Oh! My drink. Yeah uh this is Victorian Orphan Tears. It's a Halloween special drink."

" Hm, I'd better get one now before the night's over."

They nodded and looked back into their glass. Surely the wolf would would want to leave their gloomy presence and this was were the interaction would end. But no he stayed after his drink was served, enjoying three long sips.

" Mmm, that is as tasty as it smells. Glad I found an autumn drink without pumpkin spice in it. No offense if you're a pumpkin lover yourself, Little Red."

" Hm? Oh no offense at all. I've got nothing against the flavor but I can see how it can get overwhelming this time of year. There are other spooky flavors out there."

The wolf let out a light chuckle, pearly white fangs twinkling as bright as his fur.

" Yes exactly. I for one would love to see more cherries next halloween."

" Cherries?" Y/n snickered almost into a chuckle of their own, a rare reaction for them these days. " What's scary about cherries?"

The wolf grinned slyly.

" Well, there's nothing seemingly scary about them. So they usually get overlooked as a cute little fruit. But then you squeeze 'em just right into a glaze and they look just like blood. Even so you can't help but want to take a bite. Then you realize how good it is and can't get enough. By then your mouth's already stained red as if you did actually consume blood." he finishes, taking another sip of his drink.

" Wow, I guess cherries are a good fruit for Halloween." they say, taking sips from their drink as well.

" I'm surprised you hadn't considered it. You know with your costume and all. It's the perfect shade of cherry red just like the actual Little Red Riding Hood." he leans in a bit and whispers. " Though I'd steer clear of her tonight, I hear she's trying to copyright her likeness like Fairy Godmother did."

Y/n chokes a nearly spits out half their drink.

" Wait really?!" they panic looking around the room for a similar red hooded figure.

The wolf throws his head back in a guffaw.

" Oh man." he catches his breath. " I'm sorry. I just wanted to see how you'd react.

Y/n catches on and playfully punches his shoulder.

"You jerk, I thought I was in legal trouble for a second." they finally manage a full laugh.

" I know I know, but you seemed so down. Thought a good laugh might help. "

" Yeah. It did actually. Thanks."

They get caught once again into prolonged eye contact, now with something softer between them. The wolf is the first to break.

" Oh forgive me. I've been rude."

" What? No you haven't." they almost said ' you've been lovely ' but stopped themself in time before coming on too strong to a guy who was probably just making friendly small talk. They hadn't been looking their best lately and worried tonight wasn't an exception. Their friends' makeover only barely made their dark circles disappear.

" No but I have. I've been rambling on with you as if you're not here with someone."

Their brows shot up.

" U-uh. I'm not here with anyone. I mean! I am technically with my friends. So yeah in a way yeah." ' smooth real smooth Y/n.'

The wolf raised a brow, intrigued.

" I see. But you're not here with someone as a couples costume kinda thing?"

" No. Who would my partner come dressed as anyway?" they asked genuinely confused. ' What kind of pair would that be? Little Red & Granny? Cute and funny but not romantic partner material.'

The wolf stared intently, amused grin spreading.

" The Big Bad Wolf." he said in a low tone.

Y/n eyes widened with embarrassment. ' Oh God! I'm so stupid of course that would be it!!! ' Apparently self induced seclusion plus whatever magic charisma this guy had was enough to turn their mind to mush within a few minutes. Luckily the Tavern band's leader got everyone's attention on the mic.

" Hey hey how's everyone feeling tonight?!" a loud drunken applause came in response from the crowd. " Great cuz we're nearing the end of the night." a not so pleased ' aww' responded with one ' boo ' that Y/n hoped wasn't one of her friends. " Alright settle down, let's end the evening off with a slow but sensual number."

Soon enough the band filled the room with a tune that got the crowd coupling onto the dance floor. Some more sober than others but all having a good time. Y/n couldn't help the tinge of envy at seeing all of them so happy. But they were pleasantly surprised when they noticed the wolf extending a hand ( paw?? ) to them.

" I know it's a bit on the nose. But would you mind if I played the part of your wolf tonight?" he asked. His hood was off now, revealing cute slightly lowered ears that looked soft to the touch and ruby eyes filled a hint of vulnerability. How could Y/n say no to such an adorable face.

They smiled and took his hand. It was much colder than expected but still a little warm. His obsidian claws gently clutched the back of their hand, careful not to scratch.

" I wouldn't mind at all."

They joined the rest on the dance floor. His other hand pulled them in by their waist just enough to leave some space in-between them as they swayed to and fro. From the outside perspective they made quite the pair. Their cloaks flowed into a wonderful shade of red and black with every spin. Onlookers thought that the two were apart of a couples costume and hadn't just met. Y/n didn't notice any of them, even her friends who caught sight of them after not finding them at their stool. No Y/n didn't notice at all because they got lost in the wolf's red eyes again. Would any paint be vibrant enough to replicate its color?

" You know. You seem really familiar. Have we met before?" he asked, looking down at them while still taking the lead with ease.

" I would've remembered if we met before." those eyes were unforgettable, unless they were contacts, but his voice surely was real and no way in hell they'd forget it. " I've been in the newspaper a few times though." they said sheepishly.

" Wait...are you Y/n L/n?"

They nodded, kind of surprised that he guessed correctly that fast.

" Oh man I knew it! I love your work by the way. It's mesmerizing."

Y/n's pride and joy began to rise.

" Really?"

" Of course. You capture the radiance of life that most people overlook."

" Huh. I've never though of it that way. Thank you."

" No thanks needed. I'm merely speaking the truth. I'm glad that you're taking a break. You've done so much over the years."

Y/n's mood immediately dropped and they looked away, going back to the dark place they had been in not too long ago. The wolf caught on.

" Are you alright, Y/n?" he asked. They could clearly hear his concern. He deserved an honest explanation.

" I'm not taking a break," they admitted. " I'm stuck."

" Isn't that the same thing?"

" No. Breaks are by choice. This is different. I can't get out of this rut no matter how hard I try."

" Then don't try. Just don't make anything and let it come naturally."

" What? I can't do that."

" Why?"

They were starting to get really upset now. Why didn't he get it.

" Because I'd be letting everyone down." they met his gaze. Despite how much he seemed to not understand, his stare was serious and knowing.

" Wouldn't letting yourself down be more important?"

Y/n felt everything stop, realizations and questions coming in at once. It took them a while to notice that the music had stopped, everyone was getting ready to leave, yet the wolf held onto them until their thoughts settled.

" I think your friends are coming to get you." they followed his gaze behind them and sure enough, the gang was approaching. " If you're not busy later tonight. Come meet me by the woods. There's something I want to show you."

He kissed the top of their hand before letting them go and departing swiftly from the tavern like a shadow.

Y/n's group wanted all the details on the mystery wolf but were a bit too tipsy and tired to keep up. Y/n wanted to get everyone home safely, but the responsible parent friend of the group took charge. They heard the wolf's proposition and sent Y/n on their way to finally getting some action. But not before a stern talk about strangers, and safety and giving them a pocket dagger. Honestly Y/n could ask for better friends.

As promised. The wolf was waiting by the woods, cloak flowing in the wind. He smiled when saw them. He offered them a hand and they took it once again.

" I have a confession to make." he said as the two strolled through the forest.

" Yeah?" they couldn't help but stare at how the moonlight perfectly illuminated his fur. It was as if he was made for the night.

" I wasn't smelling your drink..."

Y/n stared at him confused and thought for a minute. It hit them once they saw the mischevious look in his eyes. Heat began to rise to their face. He chuckled at their dumbfounded look.

" The words slipped out before I could stop them so I tried to cover myself. To my luck the drink was sweet too."

" I can't believe you'd sniff a total stranger." they palmed their face with their free hand that had been chilled by the night air.

" Well technically I didn't have to try. My nose is pretty strong. Though I will admit there was some conscious effort. People with scents of life like yours due tend to catch my attention."

" Scents of life?" they asked as the wolf took the lead in front to guide them through a narrow path of trees.

" Yes. It's a bit complex but I'd describe it as a mix of sunflowers, lilies and tulips but," he glanced back at them," yours has an extra hint of vanilla, very soft and sweet."

The heat that had started to fade came back with full force to Y/n's face. They weren't wearing anything that smelled like that. There's no way they'd have a natural scent like it either.

" That's nice but I doubt I smell like that."

The wolf let go of their hand to jump down a sizable dip in the path.

" Trust me you do." he held out his arms to them. Although unsure at first if he could support their weight, they soon jumped down. Once caught, the wolf held them close to his chest, gaze deep and grin wide. " You possess the sweetness of life that I adore dearly."

There was no doubting his truthfulness with the look in his eyes and softness of his voice. Y/n was content enough in the moment that they wished it lasted longer but he put them down and lead the way again.

" Unfortunately it's starting to fade away. Which is why I've brought you here."

Before they could ask they saw the answer in front of them. They were on a small cliff and beyond it was the expanse of the forest with a valley in the center. Y/n was already entranced by the breathtaking view before they noticed light begin to peek over the horizon.

" Ah we're just in time." said the wolf at their side, leaning against a tree arms folded.

The sun slowly rose, chasing away the dark. The valley began to wake with a new life, colors coming forth as flowers bloomed. With the sun came warmth as well, getting rid of the chill that Y/n had gotten use to. They weren't sure how long they stood there, but birds started to sing as the night turned to morning. It was all so beautiful that they wanted to find the words, write the words and maybe even paint them, but as usual nothing came.

" You see Y/n. I think I know what's got you stuck," the wolf began, Y/n had almost forgot he was there. " You began creating things for the enjoyment of yourself. Those creations then became joy for others. But as time went by, you started to only create to make others happy. To fit their expectations. You used up more of yourself than most people do in their lifetimes. Am I making sense for far."

They nodded, still unable speak.

" It's a frustrating dilemma. Frightening even. But take the sun for example," he gestured to the light that was now brighter than before," It's a creator too. It's light gives way for all sorts of life to prosper. Yet at times it can be too much for some to handle. Or perhaps a few clouds get in the way and it's light can't shine through. And in moments like this, it creates little things that most wouldn't know to appreciate. Even so, the sun doesn't care. It travels across the sky shining endlessly."

He walks up to them, places a hand on their face and wipes away tears they hadn't noticed were falling.

" You need to create for yourself. Whether you feel its good enough or not I'm sure people will love it. And if not, you'll have more than enough love for it. Just go easy on yourself and take your time."

" But...what if I'm running out of time?" their voice came out quiet and shaky.

The wolf continued to hold their face. He held a gaze so caring that they wanted to melt into him.

" Don't worry. You're not going anywhere any time soon."

While Y/n almost took that assurance as normal, wanting to remain in the bliss of the moment, something was different about it. In fact everything felt different about him. Wait who the hell was he anyway?!

" Who are you?"

His smile dropped into a frown, as if he wanted to stay in the bliss of the moment as well. But this was reality and they deserved the truth.

" I'm Death."

There was a long moment of silence, both remained still. As if reading their mind he continued.

" Yes seriously. And no I'm not messing with you this time."

Y/n managed to find their composure.

" Wow uh...nice to meet you."

" Hah, you're taking this well."

" Not sure how else I'm supposed to take it. Might freak out later though."

He laughed again. His hands had traveled down to theirs without them knowing. They didn't mind. They found comfort in them despite now knowing why they were so cold for someone with fur.

" That's very kind of you. It's always nice having some be calm around me. Though I'm sure you know that I mean you no harm."

" Yeah," they smiled up at him, " You've helped me a lot actually. I think my spark's returning."

" Good," he let them go, going back a few steps, " Then my work here is done."

" Wait!" they grab his hands. " You're leaving?"

Death's shock of their suddenness then turned to a saddened look.

" Yes. I've already interfered more than I should. It would be best if I go now. I'm sorry. I was really having a lot of fun with you."

" Then stay a little longer." they pulled him in closer. " Please?"

" I..." he hesitated, pondering over something he knew he shouldn't. " I'll always be around so I could come visit when I can."

Y/n beamed with joy.

" That would be great. I look forward to it." though they couldn't help but push further. " But are you sure you can't stay a little longer right now?"

Death thought on it. He knew he should say no. He'd already been taking too long of a break. But their eyes were pleading to him and their hands were so warm. The souls of the dead weren't going anywhere he supposed, but it'd be a lot of overtime.

" I guess, but on one condition."

" Anything."

He regained his signature sly grin and leaned in closer.

" I want to be the first one to see what you create next."

They gave him a warm smile in return.

" I'd love to. I think I'm writing mood right now."

" Oh?," Death's ears perked up and his tail wagged a bit. " I hope it's another novel then."

" Huh, I didn't peg you for the YA type."

" Yes I like those too but I was thinking of your other ones."

" What other o-" then it hit them. " No..."

Death grinned, fangs and all.

" Yes."

" No. Oh no! You read those?!" they put their flaming face in their palms, silently cursing their friends for convincing them to publish those spicy books. " Oh god I could die right now."

Death laughed and pulled them into his chest, giving comforting pats on the back.

" Sorry that won't be happening anytime soon. And I'm having too much fun with you anyway."

That morning Y/n went from someone who feared Death to someone who welcomed him. They learned surprising things about him as well. Like how his fur was so soft, he liked to be scratched behind the ears and he tasted oddly of cherries.

#puss in boots wolf #puss in boots the last wish #puss in boots #wolf puss in boots #pibtlw #puss in boots wolf x reader #puss in boots death x reader #puss in boots muerte x reader #I feel like death can make his presence less intimidating when needed which is why y/n wasn't freaked out by him #also y/ns just a huge simp for wolf brooding types but aren't we all #I'm fully implying that Death ate a bunch of cherry flavored halloween candy before going to the party #their friends are gonna flip their shit when they here about what happened 😂 #can y'all please make more fics for this guy🥺

[dandydingo]

Why I’m Leaving Freelance Commission Work An essay about doing furry commissions by DandyDingo

Preamble  First and foremost I’d like to state that this is not a post geared toward complaining about commissioners or fellow artists in my industry. I’ve simply noticed a concerning disconnect between commissioners and artists about several topics and wanted to make something that explains, clarifies, and elaborates on some of those issues.

I love the community I’m a part of and would like to see it do better! Though it’s a meme that if you want to make money as an artist you should become a furry, it’s actually a double edged sword that I’ll be trying my best to pick apart and display. The following points I’ll be rambling about are also based on my personal experiences working in this type of career for 3 years. I am by no means the most qualified but I’m not the least qualified either; this to say please take what I say with a grain of salt. It won’t apply to all situations!

With those disclaimers out of the way, get ready for a whole lot of reading!

What is this job and how does it work? Typically when someone is referring to a furry artist they mean an artist selling illustration commissions on a freelance basis. There are many different kinds of independent creators though and this could include someone who sells merchandise, makes a living off patreon with comic work, or does fursuits. For the sake of staying focused we’re discussing artists who specifically sell illustrations and work one-on-one with commissioners to accomplish this.

As any seasoned commissioner knows, the way an artist’s process works can be varied but typically involves:

buying an open slot for a commission type (ex: a painting)

handing over your references, requests, and paying 

waiting for a work in progress image to approve 

receiving the final product

This process is the basic premise, an industry standard if you will. The artist gets the benefit of controlling when they can take on work and the commissioner has the opportunity to communicate what they want at multiple stages of the project.

But why are there so many variations to what projects an artist will even accept, what’s in their TOS, and how long it takes them to do it?

Specialization  The thing about many furry artists is we’re independent creators with little to no formal education in illustration. We’re not the type of artists you see putting together Magic the Gathering cards or developing a big title game. To expect that level of industrial standard with speed and quality would be ludicrous! This is what makes us appealing to commission though- you’re not going to find our product anywhere else and you’re supporting an artist you like directly. 

In fact, every furry artist is a unique snowflake with their own specializations. This is partially since art takes a ridiculous amount of time to get good at. An artist is almost forced to choose what they can offer and what they’re going to invest in trying to sell. This can even be out of our control! For example, one of the running jokes with my slice of community is the fact that after drawing a single bird furry there was suddenly an entire flock asking me to draw their bird sonas. 

Specialization directly rewards furry artists with more steady income / clients and thus they might have to restrict what they can offer. Again, learning to draw something new takes a lot of time. An artist who has never touched backgrounds will struggle a lot to suddenly try and include them in their work. This doesn’t mean it can’t be done or that an artist doesn’t want to. I would even argue this hyper specialization can often leave artists in a depressing loop they feel they can never escape from. If they suddenly draw something else it won’t sell, their personal interests have been buried by what actually works on the market.

Some artists do break this mold though and either enjoy the specialization they’re in or are experienced enough to draw whatever they fancy at a high quality. Perhaps even, their audience expects and celebrates an experimental approach from them which is something that’s true in my case. One of my most successful commissions were “surprise bags” where requests and edits weren't even allowed! Others are not fortunate enough to have that option though.

In any case, this is not the sole reason for the insane variety we see in furry artists and why their commission processes vary so much but it is a huge part of it. For context, the level of skill you see in my art took 5 years to get to and I would consider myself intermediate at best. It’s truly an underrated skilled trade.

Prices - Part 1 Cost of Living Money, everyone’s favourite non-controversial topic! So why is furry art so expensive? 

It costs a lot to be a living breathing creature with a roof over your head and food in your belly. We all feel the current effects of inflation and ridiculously high rent. This is definitely a big reason why art can / should cost a lot and believe it or not MOST artists do not make minimum wage.

This doesn’t just apply to furry artists of course and I would be beating a dead horse on something we all already know, the economy is in a terrible state right now. It depends on what country / area you live in, what your living situation is, if you have any pets or health issues, etc.

In general though, that $200 price tag for a reference sheet doesn’t make the cut in most places. It might be the single biggest reason why I cannot continue this work anymore, the price I can sell something for is only so high but my workload will remain the same. That reference sheet will take me 2-4 days to complete no matter what if I want to maintain the good quality a commissioner is (understandably) paying me for. 

Depending on what you're selling and where your experience level is at (the more experienced you are the less time it takes to complete something at an acceptable quality) a commission can take 1 hour to finish or it can take 12 hours. So… just do a lot of smaller cheaper stuff right? 

Prices - Part 2 The Great Artist Killer, BURNOUT If an artist cannot manage to sell a few big things to meet their monthly bills they might instead switch gears to sell lots of small affordable things. This can mean doing 20-40 commissions a month at a back breaking pace. While all jobs slowly drain the life out of your soul, art demands a level of mental focus that is often overlooked and in the case of this career, you only have you to do the work that is required. 

There is no one to cover your shift, there is no one to assist you, and if you don’t make your deadlines your reputation is at stake. The very same reputation of good work ethic that keeps your commissioners coming back the next opening. You must push through the burnout! You must work until your hand aches and bleeds! You must- there is no one to save you from this Hell!

If you try to be an affordable or high production artist this is the life you have to look forward to. Desperately churning out product as you retrofit your creativity and passions into a well oiled machine. Often to try and prevent this artists will raise their prices to something they can live off without breaking themselves or have a mix of high / low prices. A middle ground if you will, something that still doesn’t make the standard of living but isn’t a death march either. It’s a precarious and strange limbo with financial insecurity but hey… at least you’re not dead. It should be noted as well that most artists struggle with some form of mental illness and selling commissions might even be the only career open to them. This is not a topic I feel qualified to speak on but it does play an enormous role in experiencing burnout and the general struggles of this career. 

Prices - Part 3 Afterthoughts While I wish artists could push for an appropriate living wage, I understand the commissioners' side as well. Spending $100 that could go toward groceries is just not feasible for the vast majority of us and so when we see something that is actually in our range, a $20 headshot or $10 sketch, we often hop on it without a second thought on the ethics of paying that low. It is okay to buy a treat for yourself that is within a price range you can afford though! You should never spend what you can’t nor should you ever feel pressured or guilty to buy something.

If a commissioner is concerned about paying enough I would recommend saving up and giving as big of a tip as you can! Artists are almost always underselling themselves and even just a $5 tip covers the cut that Paypal takes or buys them a coffee to get through the day. Buying what’s reasonable for you is absolutely still supporting them and a little goes a long way!

NOTE : any artist can experience burnout or struggle with meeting minimum wage no matter what they’re selling; this is a hard topic to pick apart Making Art - Part 1 The Process So how does making art work? That might seem like a silly question but it’s hard to understand when you’re not the one creating it. Given how closely a commissioner and artist must work together in order to achieve a desired result I think it’s worth breaking down what goes into making a piece. Of course every illustrator is different but here’s how it generally works:

Hope You’re Mentally Well Art requires mental concentration, particularly for something complex such as a city. Often a bad mental state can be worked around but sometimes the process stops here- you’re just not able to focus enough to measure out that perspective or break down the complex anatomy that goes into drawing a hand.

Find References An artist may need to take an hour or so to find the right references or to make thumbnail sketches. Especially if your client asked for something specific (like a particular brand of whisky) you need to know what it looks like and how it will fit into the piece. For small quick pieces though this is usually a waste of time and skipped.

Sketching Here is often where the commissioner sees the first glimpse of work done- the sketch! Some artists are messy, some are neat and tidy. They might be drawing you a reference sheet or a headshot but either way you typically get to take a glimpse at their blueprint and ask for changes before the rest happens. Sketches are easy to change and can be redone from scratch with the least amount of time lost if needed. It is the optimal step to work with the client on making sure expectations are met.

Rough Render To keep it across the board for all types of art (painting, cell shading, lineless, etc) we’ll call this part the rough render. A commissioner may be shown the flatcolor swatch to ensure markings were drawn accurately, the lineart to double check all requested details have been included, the rough lighting to give an idea of the mood… the list goes on and on! Some artists skip this step entirely if it’s not needed, there is such a thing as oversaturation when it comes to communication.

Final Product This is simply where the commissioner and artist part ways once everything has been approved, the final product! It may have taken hours or days to get to this step but either way it’s been completed.

Making Art - Part 2 When It Doesn’t Go Smoothly Sometimes an artist’s workflow is so rigid even a single missed day from bad mental health or a life event can have a cascade effect that puts them behind schedule. Quite literally an artist can only draw for so many hours before their hand (or body in general) physically gives out. I’ve had work days where I’ve tried to push myself in order to catch up, to the point of rubbing the skin off my finger enough to make it bleed. In the long run this can mean career-ruining cases of carpal tunnel in the wrist or hand and like with any other desk job; your neck and back aren't very happy about the workload either. Artist work days are often shorter than what’s considered normal which adds to the general difficulty of the career as well. While some artists can certainly work that full 8-10 hour shift, others might only be able to handle 3-6 hours before they can’t concentrate or are in too much pain to continue (speaking in long term for that one, it took a few years of regular work before I started having real physical issues from drawing too much). Given most are stuck at certain price points for selling their art it’s almost impossible to charge more in order to compensate for these possible missed days. It’s an issue with other careers as well which I do want to acknowledge; missing even one day of work could mean less groceries that week or cost someone their job in extreme cases. We truly live in a society! It should be noted though that keeping an impossible schedule is a huge stressor for artists who are stuck having to produce more than they can mentally or physically take on. They often know they can’t do it but what other choice is there- not buying the medication you need that month? This always seems to lead to something public and discussed a lot in the community; the instances of being issued a refund out of the blue or seeing a lengthy mental breakdown post about suffocating in the stress of it all. The wear and tear on creativity is visible as well. An artist’s work may become monotone or lifeless as they sink further from the weight of impossible to meet expectations. They might struggle to produce what they used to be able to as time marches on or simply feel unbearably hopeless. If the unsustainable workflow continues for too many years passion becomes strangled and real physical consequences are apparent. 

Some are able to escape this or don’t have this issue! Others suffer in silence or might not be aware of the strain they are being put through, as is the case with plenty of other careers.

How Can I Support Artists? If you’re interested in making life easier for your favourite artist there are a few simple things you can do; specifically in regards to the commission process!

Read the Terms of Service This is not something you should skip over as it could detail how edits are handled, what an artist is willing to draw, etc. It's beneficial for everyone that the TOS is read.

Look Before You Buy Take a peek at an artist’s gallery and decide if you like their style before you purchase anything OR buy a small sample to see if you enjoy how they draw your character! I feel some commissioners don’t understand that an artist cannot change how they stylize on a whim (for example a semi-realistic artist isn’t going to suddenly draw anime). If you’re indifferent or you like experimentation then this isn’t something you need to worry about.

Have A Reference Sheet Although reference sheets are expensive, if you frequently commission artists and are able to afford it BUY ONE! It saves a huge amount of time and frustration- so much so that some artists won’t even consider accepting your commission without a proper reference sheet. Having to guess the body type or colors takes a lot of time and can easily be prevented!

Leave Wiggle Room Give an artist some room to breathe with a bit of artistic freedom! Do not expect them to get that exact #CCE5FF shade of blue you want or draw every single marking of a complex pattern. Lower your expectations if they’re that high, you’ll enjoy the piece more when you do!

Tip Particularly if you’re commissioning a character with a lot of detail or have very specific requests, leave a tip. Again all it takes is a $5 tip to make a difference!

Advice For Artists If you’re truly looking to get into this industry or have been in it for a while, here are some tips that can (hopefully) help make your job a little easier or get started. I don’t want to discourage people from this job by any means! We wouldn’t have the community we do without freelance artists. NEW ARTISTS

Start Small If you’re just starting out you’ll want to aim for the $10 - $50 price range with marketable pieces such as icons or chibis. You may have to heavily undersell yourself for a while to grow a client base. If you don’t sell anything at first don’t be discouraged! It’s perfectly normal to struggle for a while (even years) before you have anything steady.

Experiment Now is the perfect time to experiment and see what works and what doesn’t, what you like and what you hate. Try different platforms, different commission types and styles, whatever you fancy! The goal is to find a niche you can wedge yourself into, feel happy with, and work towards; not to fish around for immediate results.

Focus On Studying The more experience and tools in your belt, the better. For the first while you should be focusing on improving your art if you’re not at an intermediate level. Once hands don’t feel like such a struggle you know you’re at the right place! This will set you up to be more efficient and feel less frustrated down the road.

EXPERIENCED ARTISTS

Personal Time For the sake of your mental health you need to set aside time to do personal art, experiment, and relax. This could mean having a consistent day off, finding a new hobby, or making vent art just for yourself. Also, don’t be afraid to post personal art! You should not be apologizing for taking reasonable time to yourself.

Experimental Commissions Allow yourself to open weirder commission types from time to time. Maybe lately you’ve been really into drawing beach scenes, you could open a 2 slot commission that promises summer vibes. These could be filler between your bigger pieces or replace them every now and then depending on what you can get away with. Other examples I’ve seen are selling goretober calendar slots or $10 artistic freedom sketches. Just try to get yourself out of that repetitive loop if you feel like you need to, worse case it doesn’t sell!

It’s Okay To Quit Not all of us have this option given personal circumstances but there is no shame in leaving this career. Doing commissions even as a casual filler can rob you of the passion you once had for your hobby. If you feel genuinely unhappy with this job and come across the opportunity to safely leave, go for it! In my case I’m going from commission work to comic work, something within the same general field that I can do at my own pace. 

Afterword Although I tried to cover as much as I could with this, I know not every issue of the relationship between commissioners and artists was addressed. There are artists who take large amounts of money and then ghost their commissioner. There are commissioners who negatively nitpick at every step of the process and leave an artist feeling like a beaten down dog. The furry community is huge with lots of different folks, there will of course be bad eggs that make things harder for both sides. 

I simply hope this leaves commissioners with a better understanding of an artist's perspective and gives some well deserved compassion to the creative people that breathe so much life into our community. We as artists should also appreciate the clients that support us with positive enthusiasm. This special relationship doesn’t exist in a lot of places and I hope I've offered something to help furries have a better understanding of one of the biggest aspects of our community. 

Written with much love for the wonderful people that have cheered me on over the years and the community that has always shown it's full support toward me.

#furry community discussion #long post #essay #dandydingo

[allthingsfangirl101]

Simply Lovelorn–Keys

Keys' POV

I looked over at Y/N, my stomach doing a weird flip when a piece of hair fell in front of her face. I had to resist the urge to reach forward and move it for her. I took a deep breath as she tucked that hair behind her ear and fixed her glasses. I let out a small laugh, making Y/N look at me when I noticed it.

"What?" She asked.

I grabbed a nearby rag and used my water bottle to wet it. Using the rag, I cleaned the paint off her cheek.

"Thanks," she whispered. I laughed as she instantly went back to the painting she was working on. My heart jumped into my throat when she started humming her favorite song, Fantasy by Mariah Carey.

I've known Y/N most of my life. She moved in a few houses down when we were in middle school. Her dad started working with my dad. At first, we didn't really know each other. Our dads worked together, sure. Our moms would talk if they ran into each other at the store. But Y/N and I didn't talk.

Until the company picnic the summer after they moved here. I was eating a hamburger when I looked over and noticed her drawing in the dirt in the garden nearby.

"Whatcha doin'?" I asked. Y/N jumped and looked up at me.

"Drawing," she stuttered.

"You're really good."

"Thanks," she blushed as she looked away and went back to drawing in the dirt. I sat next to her and watched her.

After that picnic, when school started up again, I saw Y/N eating lunch alone. I walked over and sat with her. Ever since then, we've been inseparable.

Four years ago, Y/N and I got an apartment and moved to Cambridge together. I started going to MIT while Y/N started going to the Massachusetts College of Art and Design in Boston.

Y/N wasn't entirely sure what she wanted to do once she got her degree. She talked about opening a gallery. She also talked about becoming an illustrator for children's books. She wasn't sure. I, on the other hand, knew exactly what I wanted to do. My plan was to code a video game that changed the world.

I was almost done with the game I started my senior year. I looked away from my laptop when Y/N put her paintbrush in the cup of water.

"What are you thinking for dinner?" She asked, rolling her shoulders.

"I'm not hungry," I mumbled, going back to altering my code. I heard Y/N giggle but I didn't look up.

"Keys," she sighed. She moved next to me on the couch and slowly closed my laptop. "You haven't eaten anything since I got home from class. Five hours ago."

"I'm fine," I said as I started to open my laptop again. Y/N sighed as she instantly closed it.

"Walter," she whispered, "I know how stressed you are, but you have to eat. How about I make that pasta dish you always scarf down?"

I looked at her worried eyes and my heart melted. Even before we moved in together, Y/N has always taken care of me. She constantly put me ahead of her, even though I begged her not to. It's what helped me fall in love with her. That and how protective I was of her.

"How about I help?"

                                * * * * *

Three days later, I was still glued to my laptop. The door opened and I instantly heard Y/N quietly singing.

"But it's just a sweet sweet fantasy baby. When I close my eyes, you come and you take me. It's so deep in my daydreams. But it's just a sweet, sweet fantasy baby."

I listened to Y/N's voice echo through the apartment, but I kept typing away.

"Keys?" Y/N stopped singing and called out. "You home?"

"In my room," I called back. I heard my door open more but didn't turn around. Y/N sighed as she walked in. She gently put her hands on my shoulders and leaned her chin on the top of my head.

"I was going to ask you what you're doing," she whispered, "but I could answer that question myself. You're working on your game."

"I'm so close," I sighed.

"You said that three months ago," Y/N mumbled. She stood up and hesitated before squeezing my shoulders. I turned around as she started to leave.

"Y/N," I sighed, "please don't do that."

"Do what?" She asked, wrapping her arms around herself and turning toward me.

"You hate when I get hyper-focused on a code," I said, leaning my elbows on my knees.

"You stop eating," she said, looking at her shoes. "Don't you remember the last time you got focused on a code? It was your senior project. I came home from class and you were barely conscious. I had to call an ambulance."

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

"At least take a break," she said, her voice dropping to a whisper. "Please? I ordered a pizza. It should be here soon. Come take a break and eat something. We could watch a movie or something."

My heart sank when she rubbed her arms. She only did this when she started to overthink something. She looked up, her eyes hopeful when I stood up. I grabbed her hand and led us to the other room. We sat on the couch and started looking for a movie.

Two movies and an entire pizza later, Y/N started to fall asleep. I leaned her over so she was resting on my shoulder. I looked down and my heart got caught in my throat when I saw her smiling in her sleep. This was another thing I secretly loved about Y/N.

If I were to create a video game character based on Y/N, she wouldn't necessarily be the one that everyone wanted to be. She would be the one that only the best players used. The one that, if you knew how incredibly amazing she was, she'd be unstoppable.

I turned the movie off and sighed. I looked over at Y/N and moved some hair out of her face. I couldn't resist as I leaned down and kissed her forehead.

I carefully sat up and picked her up bridal style. I froze when she cuddled more into my chest. I carried her down the hall and to her room. I softly kicked her door open and walked in. I laid her down and slowly pulled her blanket up to her chin.

After watching her sleep for a few beats, I forced myself to leave her room. I went back to coding my game but my mind was on Y/N.

Before I even knew what love was, Y/N became the girl of my dreams. It wasn't until high school that I realized it. High school was when Y/N blossomed. She became the legendary artist at our school. Whenever the student council wanted a mural painted, they called her. She was the star of every student art show.

Which means, every "artsy" guy was after her. Every day, a new guy was talking to her, walking her to class, or offering to hold her books. They only did it once. Because after, I'd threaten them to leave her alone. She didn't know about any of this.

Then again, I didn't know why I was doing it either until I was telling my mom about some football player who asked Y/N to be his partner for a history project. The entire time I was ranting about how he was going to hurt her, my mother had a knowing smile on her face. My mom was the one who pointed out that I might want to be more than friends with Y/N.

I realized she was right. I tried to avoid Y/N the next day, but I couldn't do it. I couldn't handle going one day without her. Every day I'm with her, I'm more alive than I've ever been.

Y/N changed me. She made me the kind of guy I'd never thought I'd be. And I didn't hate it.

                                * * * * *

A week later, I was finally finished with my game. I had Y/N look at the graphics before sending it to a couple of different gaming companies. Ever since I sent them, I have been a nervous wreck. Y/N tried to help distract me but when she went to class, I was on my own.

Tonight, Y/N was having a student gallery. Each senior gets their own hallway in one of the buildings at the college. Y/N was really excited but even more nervous. She's always been nervous when showing other people her artwork. She didn't need to be worried. All of her paintings were beautiful.

I walked around the gallery, not really looking as I headed toward Y/N's hallway. I instantly knew when I got to Y/N's section. I've seen her working on some of them at home. I stopped, cold in my tracks when I saw one of her paintings.

"Do you like it?"

I turned around to see Y/N standing there. She was in a beautiful cocktail dress that flared out at her hips. She was nervously playing with her hands.

"I have seen you working on every single one of these," I whispered, unable to find my voice, "but I've never seen this one."

I turned back toward the painting on the wall. It was a watercolor of her and me.

A few weeks ago, I came home and Y/N wasn't there. I tried calling her but she didn't answer. After about half an hour of worrying and getting sicker by the minute, I knew where she was. I found her at the park by our apartment building, slowly swinging. I could tell by the look on her face that she was struggling. I didn't say anything. I walked over and sat next to her on the other swing. We sat there, slightly swinging for what felt like hours.

Growing up, Y/N and I always hung out on that swing set. In this particular moment that she captured, she was picking the petals off a flower while I gazed at her. If you hadn't been there, you wouldn't have known it was of me and her. You would've seen a girl and a boy swinging. But I saw one of my favorite moments with the girl of my dreams.

"I wanted it to be a surprise," she said softly as she stepped up next to me.

"It's amazing," I whispered. I reached over and grabbed her hand. My chest tightened as she squeezed it in response.

"I'm really glad you're here," she said under her breath. I looked over and smiled at her. I felt a little bit of pride as I watched her face turn pink.

"I wouldn't have missed it for the world."

I spent the next two hours watching Y/N interact with people viewing her artwork. She was kind, sweet, humble, and extremely charismatic. I couldn't stop watching her.

As much as I watched her, I watched the watercolor of us on the swings more. Whenever someone walked by it, I felt weird. Almost defensive. Possessive.

"You want to walk around and look at the other galleries?" Y/N asked, walking over to me. "I think I need a break from stressing over what people think."

"Or I can stay here and eavesdrop?" I smirked causing Y/N to laugh. My heart jumped into my throat when she gently touched my arm.

"Thanks," she chuckled, "but I need my emotional support best friend."

I grabbed her hand that was on my arm and looped that arm through mine.

"That's me."

                                * * * * *

Before the gallery closed, I had to do one thing. Once I was done, I stopped by to check on Y/N. Her hands were shaking as she watched her classmates say goodbye to their families and friends. I walked over and grabbed her hand as I stepped up next to her.

"It was a great show," I whispered. "You should be proud."

"You know I'm not a proud person," she teased.

"That's why I'm here," I said, nudging her shoulder with mine. "I get to be proud for you. Of you. And I am."

"Thanks, Keys," she blushed.

"You want a ride home?" I asked, slightly clearing my throat.

"No thanks," she sighed. "I have to help take down and clean up. Then my professor wants to talk about the night. I probably won't be home until later."

My phone started ringing, cutting her off. I sent her an apologetic look before answering it.

"Hello?"

"Is this Walter McKey?"

"This is he," I said, sending Y/N a look. "Who is this?"

"This is Antwan's assistant, Jeremy," the guy greeted. "He would like to set up a meeting at Soonami to talk about buying your game."

"Oh," I said under my breath. I cleared my throat, trying to speak normally. "That would be great. Thank you. What time?"

"Tomorrow, two o'clock."

Before I could say anything else, Jeremy hung up. I slowly lowered the phone away from my ear, still trying to wrap my head around that phone call.

"Who was that?"

"Antwan's assistant," I mumbled. I finally snapped out of it, looking up at Y/N. She laughed when I picked her up and spun her around.

"What is going on?" She giggled as I put her down.

"He wants to buy my game."

"That's amazing!" Y/N cheered as she jumped back into my arms. I spun her around, this time slower. When I stopped, she still had her arms wrapped around me.

"I knew you would get an offer," she whispered. She squeezed me once before breaking the hug. She looked into my eyes, and the longer we stared at each other, the pinker her cheeks got.

"So," she cleared her throat, letting me go and wrapping her arms around herself, "who just bought the best game from the smartest MIT grad?"

"Soonami."

That one word changed Y/N's whole demeanor.

"What?" I asked when I saw the look on her face. "What's wrong?"

"I just. . . Is Soonami really the right publisher for your game?"

I opened my mouth, not entirely sure what I was going to say. Before I could stutter something out, Y/N's professor called for her. Y/N looked over her shoulder at her before glancing back at me. We stared at each other for a second before Y/N sighed and walked away.

                                * * * * *

After leaving Y/N's gallery, I didn't go straight home. I ran a few errands, stalling. I kept going over how fast Y/N's excitement turned to worry. I tried to figure out why she might be nervous about Soonami buying my game.

I walked into our apartment, my stomach sinking when I saw Y/N sitting on the couch with her knees tucked up to her chest. She was eating her favorite kind of ice cream out of the carton with a spoon.

"Bubble gum ice cream?" I asked, putting the groceries on the kitchen table. "That's your sad ice cream. I thought tonight went well."

"It did," she said, looking into the carton. She sighed, placing it on the coffee table before moving so she was sitting on the armrest.

"Is this about Soonami?" I couldn't help but ask. I walked over to the couch and sat on the cushion next to Y/N's armrest. I continued, "Y/N, I know Antwan's reputation, but Soonami is a growing company. They can help boost the game."

"I know that," she said softly, "but you have to admit this isn't where you thought your game would go."

"You're right," I agreed, "but I also know they are the only ones who gave the game a chance."

"There will be others," Y/N tried to reassure me. "Maybe you shouldn't jump at the first offer."

"What if there aren't other companies?" I shrugged. "Look, Y/N, I'm not acting like you aren't as much a part of my game as I am. You have been through everything. You were the one who tore me away from the screen. You were the one to encourage me to get help from Millie. You were the one who helped me design some of the characters. You've been by my side through all of it."

I hadn't noticed I had delicately placed my hands on her knees until I looked down. I instantly removed them.

"Maybe I am jumping into things too quickly," I cleared my throat as I continued. "I just don't want all our hard work to be for nothing."

"What does Millie think about Antwan and Soonami?"

"She's for it," I shrugged. "I'm telling you, Y/N, Antwan is awesome. He said all the right things and. . ."

"Just because he said all the right things, doesn't mean he plans to actually do them," Y/N mumbled as she looked around the house, avoiding my eyes. "I know that this is huge, but your game doesn't seem like it fits their niche. Maybe this can be a stepping stone or. . ."

Y/N stopped talking and froze. She stood up and walked into the kitchen. I held my breath as she pulled something out of my bag. She turned around, still looking at what was in her hands.

"You're the one who bought it?" She asked under her breath. When she looked up at me, she had tears building.

Of course I bought Y/N's painting of us on the swing set.

"What were you. . . When did you. . . Why did you. . . Keys?"

"I had to," I shrugged. "I couldn't let some stranger have it. It's between you and me. It's us."

Y/N looked up at me with tears streaming down her face. I gasped when she dropped her painting on the table before running over to me and wrapping her arms around my neck in a tight hug.

I wrapped my arms around her waist and looked at her painting which was facing up so I could see it. My heart sank when I felt a tear fall onto my shoulder.

"Thank you," she whispered. She slowly pulled out of our hug but kept her hands delicately on my shoulders. "You've always been there for me, Keys," she said softly. "You've been my number one fan since you watched me draw in the dirt at that picnic."

"You've always been there for me," I chuckled. "How could I not return the favor?"

Y/N's tears started to fall again as she brought me in for another hug. As I felt her pressed to my chest, depending on me, I knew I'd never let her go. At that moment, I realized what character from my game I would be.

Lovelorn.

#keys #Walter keys mckeys #keys imagine #free guy imagine #free guy #joe keery #joe keery x reader #joe keery imagines

[gasolineghuleh]

Heated

Anonymous commission for Papa iii in heat, while you’re ovulating. 

NSFW Below:

The satin sheets slip on the bed underneath your tight grip, propelled forward by Papa’s hips snapping into your own. His hand is already clamped to the back of your neck and you can feel your cunt clench with yearning as he leans over your back. Papa’s lips dot across the expanse of your shoulders, leaving small smudges of paint in their wake. You can feel his raven black hair fall forward, grazing across your skin just light enough to make goosebumps erupt down your neck. Of course he notices this, and his lips curve into a smile before pressing into you again. 

“I love it when you are like, si? Underneath me and crooning for the pleasure that you know I give you,” he whispers into your soft skin. You whine in response, rolling your hips against his. The sound of fabric on fabric is frustrating, simply reminding you that his cock is just out of reach, and only just barely pressing against where you want it the most. “Desperate for me, aren’t you? I know it. I can… smell it.” Papa buries his nose in the hollow behind your ear and takes a deep breath in, illustrating his point.

“Papa…” You clear your throat and start again, deciding to play into whatever fantasy he has going in his heat-addled brain. “You know I want you. You know I’m fertile, and willing, and able. Ready for you.” Papa’s hand tightens from its place on your hip, his nails leaving small crescent moon shaped marks in the flesh. You know he’ll likely bruise you tonight, if his fervor is anything to go off of. Still, you double down. “You can smell that I’m ovulating, can’t you?” His sharp intake of breath behind you is more than enough proof that your words landed, but still, he speaks. 

“Cara… Mia Prime Mover… You want this, then? To bear my fruit? Carry me inside of you for nine months…” He growls as his teeth grip your skin, biting and thrusting ferociously into your hips. When he ruts harder against you, you grunt and roll back into him, gliding the hard outline of his cock along your ass. Papa’s hand moves from the back of your neck around, cupping your throat in his palm and applying pressure. With a snarl he pulls you up, pressing his chest against your back and forcing you to kneel on the edge of the bed, arms flailing as you try to recover your balance. 

“Papa! Fuck!” you yelp, bringing up one hand and taking hold of his forearm where it rests across your collarbone. He responds by nipping at the lobe of your ear, pressing his ever-hardening cock into your backside. His other hand finally leaves your hip and roams to the front of your body, slowly beginning its journey towards the hem of your panties. 

“I intend to, sorella. Do not worry about that, eh?” His voice is husky in your ear, breaths coming hot and heavy as his arousal begins to cloud his senses. You know that his heat hits differently that your fertile week— he becomes lust crazed, feral almost. His eyes will haze with desire, his cock will swell larger than it should be, a knot will appear at the base… and he won’t stop fucking you until he’s gotten his fill of you. Something that could take hours. You swallow past the lump in your throat and the digging of his fingers in your windpipe and speak up once more.

“Take me. Ruin me. Make me a little heir.” The sharp intake of breath behind you is the only warning you get before Papa spins you around roughly, clawed fingernails tearing through the silk chemise as easy as a hot knife would carve through butter. A hot rush of desire flows through your body, electrifying your clit and sparking at the nerve endings in your fingers. It’s been years, but you still can’t help your response when he takes you so physically like this. 

“Sathanas and Dark Lord Below, I can smell you,” he drawls, following you onto the bed after he shoves you down, jostling the pillows and bedsheets as he does so. His tongue carves a path from your navel to the column of your throat and you can feel his canines beginning to elongate as his heat takes hold. “I can smell your arousal, si? The need… Burning, yearning. I can smell your cunt leaking for me.” His words hit you directly where you need him the most, your cunt clenching as a shudder of arousal makes your muscles tremble. 

“Tell me more,” you whisper, reaching up and wrapping your arms around his shoulders, pulling him into you. You have a sudden need to have him covering you, skin to skin and soul to soul. He obliges, flattening himself on top of you and bringing his lips to yours for the first time this evening. When you nip at his lower lip he growls, panting an open-mouthed breath of desire against you before sealing the kiss harshly, teeth dragging along your lip in return.

“You reek,” he mutters, hand finding the hemline of your panties and dipping below swiftly. “I can smell you- could smell you all the way down the hall. So wet and pliant and open… Begging for your Papa, si? You need me… So bad, you need me. Posso dire quanto mi vuoi dentro di te… Pathetic.” You moan against his lips and trap them again, kissing him roughly as your nails dig into the skin of his back through his shirt. He breaks the kiss quickly with a growl, sitting up on top of you and ripping his shirt off over his head, discarding it quickly to the side. It only takes a snip of his long nails and your shirt is laying on the bed in shreds, torn from you with ease. 

“Could the others tell? Do they know?” you ask, lifting your hips from the bed slightly to press against his. As you expected, his nostrils flare in jealousy as he presses you back down to the bed with one firm hand.

“Si... and I do not give a fucK,” he says, popping the K in his throat and finally diving his hand into your panties. “The whole Abbey knows how much you want me, how desperate you are. How desperate I am.” Papa’s finger slip-slides against your clit, slick with your desire already. He presses on the delicate bud firmly, moving his finger across it swift enough for you to tense up, muscles reacting to the sudden burst of pleasure after such a long build up. “The whole Abbey knows I’m here now, fucking you and filling you with me. You like that, eh?” 

In response you merely buck your hips against his hand, trying to force his finger lower, where you really want it. He takes the hint with enough graciousness and ease that you almost weep with relief, moaning and allowing yourself to arch off of the bed when his middle finger slides deeply into you. Papa crooks his finger inside of you, pressing against the small bundle of nerves inside of you that makes your whole body light up, electric pink and wavering floods of arousal. A bone deep groan falls from your lips as he works you to orgasm, the motions coming with a practiced ease as he guides you down from your climax, crooning to you. 

“Now… It is for Papa.” Papa sits up on top of you, undoing his belt with a jangle that goes directly to your clit, still throbbing and swollen from your orgasm. In a swift motion Papa pulls out his cock, running the head along your entrance through your panties. “The clothing is a bother, I am thinking.” He purses his lips and looks down at you, considering the irksome piece of fabric before reaching down and simply tearing it at the elastic. It gives way and falls to the side and then he’s there, the head of his cock dragging through your slickness and pressing gently at your entrance. 

“Papa, please- Please don’t make me wait longer.” You roll your hips upward to meet his cock, gasping when the head catches on your clit, muscles jolting. Papa smiles down at you and leans forward, caging you with his arms as his hands dent in the mattress. He leans close enough to you to put his lips just below your ear, pressing a soft kiss there. 

“No, no, Sister. We don’t want to put you through that, si?” He leans closer, his lips brushing the shell of your ear, now. “No, we don’t.” With one strong thrust he slides his cock into you to the hilt, his hips pressing into yours. Your mouth drops open and you keen, wrapping your legs around his waist and pulling him tighter against you, nails digging into his back as you urge him on. 

He needs no further encouragement, already starting to thrust between your legs as his lips seek out yours. Papa kisses you roughly, tongue twining with yours as he fucks you faster, harder, deeper. The bed frame rocks with his motions, slamming back into the stone wall hard enough to move the whole thing slightly with each movement. In a quick burst of passionate desire Papa moves his hands away from your shoulders, sliding them under your ass and gripping you tightly. He lifts you just enough to give himself more room, thrusting down into your cunt as he drops his head back, mouth open slightly and eyes shut in pleasure.

“Fill me, Papa,” you urge through your own moans. You bring your hands down to his, gripping his wrists under your ass and squeezing him tightly. When you clench the walls of your cunt around him he grunts, his thrusts starting to falter. “Breed me. Fill me. Make everyone know who I belong to.” 

“Cara-” Papa cuts himself off short with a moan, his hips stuttering into yours with each pulse of his climax. You can feel his cum filling you, the warmth spreading with each twitch of his cock inside of you. Finally he stops, lowering you gently and leaning over you slightly. His eyes are still closed and he’s breathing heavily, but a content smile starts to spread across his face. 

“Papa?” you ask, bringing a hand to his cheek and cupping his face gently in your palm. His eyes open and you melt, never quite able to escape the feeling of that two-toned stare. Something ethereal and deep, with a quiet but burning pain beneath them. “Say something, my love. Is your heat quelled?” Papa huffs out a quiet laugh and leans over you, pressing his nose to yours gently. 

“It never will be, as long as you’re mine.” 

His cock twitches inside of you. 

#lorraine writes #fics #ghost #the band ghost #ghost bc #nf #hfoa #papa emeritus iii #papa iii #terzo #papa emeritus

[spacecolonie]

Hello! Do you have any advice with painting? Every time I start I end up just doing lineart with colours underneath, and when I do kindles art it looks kind of like plastic. Am I supposed to merge the two layers and then start shading? What would you recommend?

Hey anon!! I actually do have some advice for that!! I'll shove it under a cut because it got way longer than I thought it would, sorry for the infodump everyone _(:3 」∠)_

quick tl;dr: painting process should consider both personal taste & the desired aesthetic of a painting, & to avoid plastic-y colours, make sure your hues vary within your values (and layer modes are ur friend) ♥

there's a million ways to start paintings & its all down to personal preference -- the end goal for the illustration can often influence the approach you take; a crisp digital painting might call for meticulous layering & sharp edged flats, but if you want something to look like an oil painting, you should try and mimic that process as close as you can! here's some examples:

this is the sketch for my FYR zine piece from last year; i intentionally approached it in a way that looks like traditional underpaintings so that when I worked directly on top, those orange tones would peek through like this:

after doing that undersketch, i manually painted everything -- no fancy layer modes, just me, one layer, and screaming ಥ_ಥ it was hard but it worked for the vibe i wanted!!

now v.s something like this:

simple shapes, roughly blocked in shading that just gets merged and painted over, as well as lots of layer modes on top for those colour changes! this is by far the easier one & the one i'd probably recommend, solely because it lets you keep more control. i go more in depth here on that -- but to quickly answer, i personally block everything (including shading) in before I merge & render!

for the other thing you mentioned, a lot of the times that 'plastic' feeling can come from either a lack of transitional shades or only using white/black for your value tones. this tweet thread (direct image links 1, 2 & 3) by frozensoba demonstrates it incredibly well -- by adding certain colour shifts in your values, it can create extra depth which is what makes stuff look more alive!! don't be afraid to really push it and get wacky

an easy way to add it while you're learning is using gradient maps to add richness in your midtones. It's not perfect since different surfaces & materials diffuse light differently, but adding one at the end of a drawing can help tie everything together. If you can do both at once though it always looks best; here's some very quick 2 minute orbs as an example:

ok I'm almost done (and im so sorry for how long this got... special interest moment TM) -- one last thing is to try varying your brush strokes & adding textures if you want. using only an airbrush or heavily relying on blurring brushes can make things look plastic too; sometimes you want that, but for the times you don't, adding some texture & leaving brush marks in can do a lot!!

lastly, since this is just me rambling, here are some artists that are incredibly talented & i highly recommend looking at for their advice & processes because it will be much more coherent than this:

Marco Bucci -- amazing educational content. if you check out any of these artists, he's the one to look at first imo. his 10 minutes to better painting series is a great place to start

Sinix Design has some amazing tutorials on anatomy & the mechanics of painting! This video & the intermediate part 2 are super

Dao Trong Le -- a veritable goldmine of speedpaints

Bo Chen & any of the riot splash artists. If that's the vibe you're after, you can't go wrong with the LoL splashes as reference

i hope that helps!!!

#tutorial #any time i have the opportunity to barf out art talk i will do it #tysm for the question too ♥ #not art #asks

[ghostsbimbo]

call of duty songs

hello!! i've decided to start a little series on my profile where i go through songs i enjoy that make me think of call of duty characters.

first song that's up is masterpiece by motionless in white. here is the normal version, and then the motion picture version. this will be under a read more considering how long this can get.

this song in my opinion is from Ghost's point of view, heavily. cw: talks of rape, ghost comic/backstory spoilers.

All the stupid lies and the stupid games Left a vacancy in this picture frame A prisoner by my own hands 'Cause if I can't have me, then no one can I need to heal what I inflict But I'll burn that bridge when I get to it As I play roulette with a broken gun I confess these sins with a sharp and spiteful tongue

So, the song starts off heavy - emotion wise. If this were written by Simon, I feel as though he'd be definitely talking about the guilt he deals with with everything he had done while being a soldier, including almost being an accomplice to rape with one of his old buddies. It results in him building up walls so new people can't get in. He removes himself from society completely, faking his death and everything else he has done. He uses this to confess all his sins/terrible things he had done.

So how do I apologize And put the tears back in your eyes When every canvas that I paint Is a masterpiece made of my mistakes?

The Chorus; please note, I will only go over this once due to it repeating. I feel like this part would be directed towards his mother in a sense. We agree he's a major mama's boy [ in a loving way. not a derogatory way. ] Considering she knows of what he has done to women since he had alluded to it, he would want to apologize to her for everything he has done that's considered terrible. He feels like he has to.

Outlined in guilt, my portrait stares In a gallery where the walls lie bare As I modernize my antique ways True colors can't escape the brush of fate

For this it would be a metaphorical portrait, of course. His portrait would definitely be in an empty gallery, his family being dead and all. He would always be shifting, changing, just so he fits in and doesn't draw attention to himself, despite being a big beefcake of a man who wears a lot of skeleton themed things which definitely make him stick out like a sore thumb. He knows he can't escape the cruel hand of fate though. Everyone does. His true colors will show at some point, he'll break the Ghost persona. It's only fate that he does.

Illustrate all my pain And set it all ablaze Burn And set it all ablaze

Simon would be talking about all his trauma. taking the trauma of living with an abusive addict of a father in his childhood, the trauma suffered at the hands of Roba, and the trauma of losing his whole family and just throwing it into the fire. Just letting it go and ignoring it - for lack of better words - as the persona of Ghost that he had molded over the years.

So how do I apologize And put the tears back in your eyes When every canvas that I paint Is a masterpiece of my mistakes? And in the light of my demise I see my failures in your eyes Every canvas that I paint Is a masterpiece made of my mistakes

This would be him about the 141 - Mostly Price with the line "I see my failures in your eyes." - I feel like he'd feel like they are judging him for his fuck ups when he does manage to have them. They're the closest thing he can get to approval & family, so they mean a lot to him, more than he lets himself show at least due to the walls he had built to protect himself.

and that's it! if you want more please comment, reblog, like, or send an ask! I really hope this also all makes sense. I did the best I could with this.

#rat speaks #rat rambles #simon “ghost” riley #motionless in white #cod songs #simon ghost riley #simon riley #lieutenant simon ghost riley #lieutenant simon riley #lieutenant simon “ghost” riley

[ivan-fyodorovich-k]

A lot of my collecting of WWII stuff was inspired by Medal of Honor: Frontline. I was playing it one day the summer I had my first job and I wondered while playing how hard it would be to find a helmet from WWII.

After acquiring said helmet, I set about putting together the uniform of this little knockoff G.I. Joe I had bought when I was a freshman in High School, dubbed "pocket Jimmy Patterson"

Pocket Jimmy Patterson there is a Sergeant in the 101st and was sold as a D-Day soldier but he's actually dressed for Market Garden.

I landed on paratroopers in part because of pocket Jimmy Patterson, and in part because I like airplanes. From there, I went with the 101st over the 82nd because I already thought they had the best patch, I liked the playing card insignia painted on the side of the helmet, the number 101 is aesthetically pleasing, and I didn't know about any other airborne units.

I mean,

Come on.

(the 101st is the one on the left, and the 82nd on the right, if you didn't already know)

I say all that because if you know anything about WWII collecting and especially re-enacting you know that elite units are dramatically over-represented and for the U.S. nobody more than the 101st, and this can be blamed almost exclusively on Band of Brothers, a show I had not even seen when I landed on the 101st.

How bad is it?

Well, by way of illustration, as a stress response to the final stages of my dissertation I've been retreating into buying WWII paratrooper stuff again, and I was questioning whether I hadn't better go with another unit this time. I had a great great uncle killed in the Philippines in WWII who was in the 11th Airborne so that's an obvious candidate, but of course if you want to stick to Europe and fighting Nazis your options are the 82nd, 101st, or 17th. Of those, the 17th only really got into the war in 1945 and if you want to do Normandy, as some 90% of re-enactments do, then you're between the 82nd and the 101st.

The 82nd has a much longer history than the 101st and, objectively, and I mean this with all implied asterisks and am speaking as though I were a twelve year old who does not know better, the 82nd is cooler, the inferior number/patch notwithstanding.

So I was on a website that is well-regarded for selling WWII militaria and they have a section for patches and I was doing some comparison of original WWII-era divisional patches. The cheapest 101st Airborne patch from WWII this guy has for sale is $175, most of them hovering closer to $300, and some in the $600 range.

11th, 17th, and 82nd patches are in the $50 range.

When I still did re-enacting as the 101st, I remember talking to some of the guys who were disappointed with the rather low "authenticity" standards of our unit (always something of a joke when a considerable number of G.I. re-enactors are in their 40s-60s and dramatically overweight), especially considering that the 101st Airborne are one of the most cartoonishly over-documented units in WWII, for whom reproductions of everything are widely available, and so there's really no excuse not to have your uniform and equipment more or less 100% correct.

Sure enough, trying to do a little research into the 82nd to see what that pool would be like, the resources are shockingly slim. The 101st had two combat jumps in WWII, Normandy and Holland. The 82nd jumped into Sicily, Salerno, Normandy, southern France, and Holland. They have a much longer combat record and are, comparatively speaking, almost totally neglected by idiots like me who are into WWII.

Even as I say all this

I am having a hard time severing the internal connection to 101

#wwii #ww2 #re-enacting #my militaria #you know #I never actually pieced together the full Pocket Jimmy Patterson uniform #I never got that M8 scabbard #never got the wire cutters #never got a Thompson #and I never got that shoulder bag #the rest of the stuff I did acquire #at this moment the only stuff on him that I have is the 1911 the helmet the scarf the belt the flag brassard the 1911 mag pouch and #ironically perhaps #that M8 scabbard #I think if I focused on the 82nd I'd try to do the 505th because there's a picture of a guy from the 505th with an M1903A4 before Italy #also they had a rampant lion (panther?) painted on the side of the helmet for Italy #not for Normandy I don't think #the 509 are also cool but they're an independent regiment

[a-driftamongopenstars]

2023 wrap-up!

this year was... well, shit! for many, many reasons, and i'm glad it's almost over and i can just leave it behind.

despite it all, i've managed to be creative here and there, write for new fandoms, explore new mediums like digital illustration and painted traditionally more as well.

i've also written way over 60k words in fic :)

i want to say thank you to all the people who stuck around, who i hung out with, who i became friends with. i hope that everyone's 2024 is kind and gentle and you get to do the things you love and enjoy.

happy new year to all ✨

#adrift babbles

[thestarfilledsea]

Ask game :3

🫂

🫂- comforting hugs

Mei and MK being besties fic

This went completely out of hand and I have no idea what the word count is since I wrote it in mobile tumblr like an animal. This isn’t my favorite but have this half burnt pinecone of a drabble.

—

birdsong drifted through the ornately built windows that looked into Mei’s room. The noble architecture, in all honestly, didn’t exactly fit the rest of the room. With biker magazines and various video game and tool strewn about the room, it was a far cry from who her parent expected her to be.

Mei knew this.

But whatever right? Some people aren’t close with their parents. That’s life.

Last night, the dinner with her parents was so awkward and stale that she had finally made up her mind to get away from her historic home.

Most of her bloodline only ruled over their share of land in a more ceremonious position, rarely having to lift a finger to earn their wealth.

However, Mei was bored. She longed for a project capable of sustaining her for longer than a few weeks. Her bike was a project! But there was only so much more she could modify on it. Of course MK was fun to be around, but he had a job and Monkey King training going on.

Mei didn’t want to admit it, but she felt the two of them drifting somewhat.

Shaking the prickling feeling of dread off her back, her eyes refocused on the laptop in front of her. College applications.

Her whole life it’d been hammered into her that her destiny was to maintain the family when the time came, so she’d never really thought about what she wanted to do with her life.

Quite honestly after everything that’s happened lately? Fuck destiny.

At least that’s the realization she had last night. The rest of the dead of night was spent gathering her documents from various folders and compiling them into one place.

Triple checking each one, Mei slowly made her way through the boring informative webpages.

Even though it was a community college, she had a plan. Spend two years here studying and then transfer to the college of her dreams.

Of course, she’d be studying film.

Her favorite moments in her childhood were spent watching movies with MK. Ranging from trashy to absolute masterpieces, she and him used to gobble them up.

Mei would play “director” with an old camera Mr Tang had lent them, whilst MK was the actor and artist behind their crude home movies.

The look on Pigsy and Tang’s faces when the two children covered in paint and smiles showed them the videos starkly contrasted the thinly veiled disinterest her parents gave her when shown.

She clicked onto the next page.

Streaming was going great! And even if her parents disowned her gods she hoped they didn’t she’d be fine. Right?

Probably.

Maybe.

Not emotionally.

Mei’s head slammed onto her pillow and groaned. She had saved the world with MK, wielded the samadhi fire and looked fearlessly into the face of a possessed Wukong and felt nothing.

Why was this scaring her? College? Her parents disowning her?

Mei dragged her face upwards. She had found an apartment in her pay range the feverish search last night and she had a plan.

All she had to do was click the last button and it’d all go into motion.

She’d always envied MK’s future. From such a young age MK knew he wanted to take over Pigsy’s noodles and be an illustrator on the side. Almost taking both of his father’s roles and weaving them into himself, like a tapestry of family and legacy. Something the dragon family seemed famous for on the surface, but lacked underneath.

Maybe it was her job to create that kind of family.

She clicked the apply button.

—

MK was drawing in his notebook when he heard Mei’s excited shouts from down the block. He peeked out his window to see Mei climbing the fire escape faster than he’d ever seen her move before.

“MKMKMKMKMKMKMK”

“WHAT.”

“I’M GOING TO FILM SCHOOL!”

Mei didn’t even finish her sentence before MK had tackled her into a hug, various papers and stuffed animals being strewn across the room in the process of the two tumbling to the floor.

There was a muffled yell of concern from Pigsy a floor below but the two paid him no mind. MK was ecstatically asking questions and Mei was shouting the answers back.

The childlike giggles and shrieks of excitement faded into quiet contentedness as Mei showed her brother what the campus looked like, and where she wanted to apply to two years into studying.

He was obviously thrilled.

—

The unplanned sleepover was wonderful. MK had called for a celebration and took Mei out to the corner store to buy a metric tonne of trashy snacks.

You should’ve seen the look on Pigsy and Tang’s faces when Mei told them. Mei will never forget as long as she lives the moment the gruff chef spun her around in the air. Or the way Tang hugged her and made her promise she’d come by if she needed help studying.

The excited questions and proclamations of pride given over homemade ramen made a familiar warmth bloom inside her chest as the sun died atop the horizon.

—

After putting on the soft pair of pajamas she left here, Mei’s stride to MK’s room was stopped by the mirror on the wall adjacent to her.

She looked…grown.

Well, grown-er.

“Mei I’m going to start the movie if you don’t get in here.”

Her introspection now seemed cringe after being so woefully interrupted by the betrayal of a loved one.

“You wouldn’t dare.”

—

“I’m kinda nervous to be completely honest.” Mei whispered half into her pillow.

“Mei.” MK’s hands found themselves on Mei’s shoulders, most likely from years of Pigsy doing the same to him. “You’ll be amazing. You’re incredible at camera stuff!”

Mei wiggled under her blanket, trying to get comfortable. “It’s not about that. It’s my parents.”

The unsaid words of ‘I feel like they’ll disown me’ sat heavily between the two.

for as long MK had known Mei, he knew that her parents were different than his own. They were strict, rarely gave praise or affection and expected Mei to be the pride of the dragon family.

A career outside of ceremony was out of the question.

“I’m sure they won’t.” MK mumbled, scooching himself closer to his best friend. “And even if they do, we’ll be here.” He smiled, handing her their favorite bag of gummies.

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

“…pinky promise?”

“Pinky promise.”

—

Ah yes. The dawn of “telling the parents” day has arrived.

MK and Mei took preemptive the measures of sneaking her documents and dearest belongings out of her house and into his room until she was in the clear. And of course, Pigsy had agreed to let Mei crash while her apartment application went through.

MK stayed positioned in a nearby bush while Mei went in white knuckling to inform her parents of her decision.

Hoo boy.

It went as poorly as it possibly could’ve.

MK didn’t hear much, but the sight of Mei marching out of the house with angry tears spilling over her cheeks was enough to understand exactly what had happened.

When he rushed forwards to ask if she was okay, Mei roughly grabbed his arm and pulled him forwards and away from the looming house.

Someone shouted something after them MK couldn’t make out as Mei stomped back towards Pigsy’s noodles.

—

She hadn’t said a word since she came back.

And neither has MK.

He’s just been hugging her silently for about an hour now.

She’s finally calmed down enough to watch a trashy monkey king movie and chuckle at the horrible one liners but that’s as far as Tang thinks she’ll recover tonight.

But he’s known Mei almost as long she’s lived. And knowing her? She’ll spitefully become one of the best cinematographer or director the worlds ever seen just to say “I told you so.”

And Tang knows that all four of them all can’t wait for that moment.

#lmk #lego monkie kid #monkie kid #lmk fics #the stars ask me stuff #THIS IS SO POORLY WRITTEN JUST TAKE ME OUT AND SHOOT ME #/hj #have this #my drabbles

[sukeart]

CODFISH your splatoon ocs are so ADORABLE! I just love your art so much you have some incredible talent. I always struggle w/ translating Splatoon character proportions into my art style and you do it so effortlessly :,,D. I wanted to ask, what software/app do you often use for your illustrations and what is your go-to brush(es)? It's an experimental thing, I'm asking other artists what they use and I'm trying to find a medium I really like. If you're not up for sharing, that's totally fine!

Also (abt the twitter tag post) I'm not entirely sure what you mean by "vibe" but piercings and jewelry spawn in on almost all of your characters. Very flowy and vibrant artstyle!

oh thank you so much!! ;; i'm really glad you like my ocs!! i actually still struggle a lot with splatoon proportions myself ;v; lots of tweaking and resizing when i sketch, I hope to be able to draw them more naturally eventually ..! But i'm glad I can make it seem like it's natural, because I put a lot of effort into it 😭🙏 Currently I use paint tool SAI ver.2 for about 95% of my drawing process. I eventually hop into CSP v1.13 if i need more specific tools or brushes (mostly for background or effects) My go to brushes in sai2 is the effect pen tool for sketching and rough lineart, and I use the brush tool for coloring and rendering (alongside the default pen and airbrush tools)

I've been using sai for over ten years now.. its very simple and clean UI allow me to focus entirely on my drawing. I've tried switching to CSP for maybe 2 years, but still ended up going back to sai, because the wide array of tools and brushes etc. that csp has just kept distracting me (think of it like forcing yourself to use a ballpen to draw instead of a pencil and eraser, with which you end up trying to correct every single small mistake you make) (i tried to simplify csp's UI to mimick sai's but it was still overwhelming for me) Good luck on finding your soulmate art program and brushes!! It can be difficult but definitely worth the experiments

And thank you!! I do really like piercings, so I'll make sure to give that new oomie some :^)

#mail #sapphiretarantula #i hope you dont mind me replying publicly i figured people might be interested in seeing my brushes (idfk)

[naumin]

2022 in review

in an effort to blog about art on my art blog more i will be writing a post covering my work in 2022 and maybe some aspirations going forward into 2023

2022 was the year of learning to paint! at the beginning i was really frustrated, a lot of my pieces were very hit or miss and i couldnt tell why some sucked and some fuckd. i nibbled at some online courses for fundamentals, James Gurney’s Color & Light book and Marco Bucci’s painting videos, and was looking for a mentor at one point but i think i stopped cuz i broke my thumb briefly lol

a piece from december 2021 that is just a bit random and i think representative of my stabbing in the dark

studying...

in June i split a schoolism sub with emma and it was an amazing decision. i think if you have limited time to practice drawing or dont know where to go the best thing is to take a course, and ive taken cheap or free courses online but the tutors on schoolism are top of the industry and the quality of their teaching is stellar imo. literally felt my brain explode with knowledge they are the best of the best. i finished the painting workout course with wouter tulp and ive dipped in and out of numerous others since then. its cool bcus u can study at your own pace.

July was artfight, i did talk about it here so not gonna repeat myself heh

then i was really busy with my MA, its been so fun and so exhausting. a year is so short and i want to try all the printing techniques and ceramics and everything cry. but hey now i know indesign and can make my own zines and stuff which is amazing. i also tabled at my first market :) i did really like it and would love to do more, dont want to put pressure on myself to do that this year but at least wanna visit them and scope out the audiences and stuff.

school really is making me appreciate traditional art again, tbh it is nothing like digital. you just cant get that chaos or physical resistance from your materials in digital, everything is very deliberate and constructed and almost predictable. ive started to incorporate more traditional work into my pieces where i can, especially photobashing. i can use photos i offhandedly took years ago and it feels really nice to get to repurpose them.

a spread from my school project, a book about one of my passions (i chose the story of how i got into elden ring!!!) i made it from paper cutting, photobashing, and digital. (im going to sell pdf and physical copies in the new year)

so circling back to the start of the year, i think you can see marked progress in my illustrations that ive posted here. i think i learned a lot about techniques within a painting but i want to learn more about pictorial composition bcus my default tends to be 3:4, portrait, charas centre, and i want to break that habit and tell more effective stories :)

over the past 2 years ive been incorporating more realism into the characters i draw and trying to be really deliberate with what features, proportions etc they have.

a 2021 isa and a 2022 isa

i think i want to maintain this level of detail because its descriptive enough for my needs but i want to push it to be more dynamic and stylised. i really admire the way disney animators like jin kim do it. its because im not confident enough with structure and anatomy to really play with it.

on the other hand with life drawing i really want to do more realism and capture exactly whats in front of me because i think i rely on style as a crutch too much hahaha.

from december. proud of these!!!

thats whats on my mind really. again really dont want to put any undue pressure on myself and i am going to be really busy until october at least. i am seriously proud of my progress in 2022. and im really looking forward to playing bloodborne x

#diary

[mercerislandbooks]

50 Years of Island Books: The Staff

This 50 Years of Island Books series is about to reach the grand finale, because November is only a few weeks away and it's almost time to pop the champagne. Since April, I've talked to booksellers and owners from years past, sales reps, and many beloved local authors to paint a picture of what Island Books has meant to the community and how it evolved into the place it is today.

Now, I'm turning my attention to the people who show up hour to hour, in the here and now, to make the store the living, breathing wonderland that it is and will be in 2023 and beyond. On a rainy Monday when the store was closed for cleaning, I pulled them aside for some heart-to-hearts.

So many times we come in and say a quick hi to these friendly booksellers, the face of a familiar place we know and love, but it's rare we think about who they are as people and what they think about as they work. I've known many of them for years and have watched the staff evolve. From my little perch, I can honestly say that they put so much love into what they do, and that our island community wouldn't be the same without them.

Side note: since I already cornered the longest tenured Island Books employee for a separate blog, Cindy only makes a tiny (and fun) appearance via Caitlin in this post. If you want to learn more about Cindy, click here.

To our Island Books booksellers—we love and appreciate all of you. Truly. Now let's get into it.

Miriam: I'm so happy to have a chance to talk to each of you. Let's start with, which book category excites you the most, and why?

Brad: Any day I can turn someone onto the Russians, like Checkhov, Tolstoy, or Dostoevsky, or someone less read, like Pushkin, is a great day. Jorge Luis Borges is a favorite for customers looking for a literary blend of fantasy and science fiction literary. He's Argentinian, and his voice differs from many other classic authors. There are so many large and small presses putting out reprints.

Becca: I'm largely a sci-fi, fantasy, and romance person. I’m not averse to other categories, but the books that I drop everything to read tend to be one of those genres (or fairy-tale retellings). I also love curling up with a good Middle Grade or Young Adult fiction.

Lori Robinson: The genre I get the most energy around right now is romance. I read widely, but I have my favorite places I like to land, although every once in a while something different catches my eye.

Caitlin: I love to sell the books I like to read: short story collections, literary fiction, translated fiction, poetry, some memoirs, and art and ballet history. When I first started at Island Books, a lot of people said, “Oh, short stories don’t sell here.” But I'm happy to say that isn't the case anymore.

Nancy: I like to read literary fiction and good narrative nonfiction, generally science and history.

Lillian: I think people would assume that I read a ton of kids books, but I’m around them so much and read them for work—at least 600 picture books a year (!), so for my own pleasure, I read mostly mystery, romance, and fantasy. 

Miriam: As a group, you have a wide variety of tastes, which is great for customers. Now, tell me about your proudest accomplishments at Island Books.

Brad: I love to draw signs. I’m a part-time illustrator with a cartoony style, maybe because I’m a big graphic novel fan.

Becca: It’s fun to have become a person that customers ask for book recommendations. -- I still feel fairly new (2 years under my belt now), but to have become an integral part of something I love so much is awesome.

Lori Robinson: Mine would be the year we sold over 200 copies of Amy Snow by Tracey Rees in six months because I kept hand selling it. It was the first time I realized the impact a bookseller could have on the success of a book that wasn’t getting all the media attention.

Caitlin: Mine would be proving that our customers do like short stories.

Nancy: I'm proud of the many stories over the years that I could bring home to my family, and tell them how we found the perfect book for a customer’s dying mother or a kid having an issue, things like that. And the funny ones—we used to have a customer who loved to give a certain book to his lady friends. Whenever we saw that title on order, everyone knew he had a successful date! I think he single-handedly kept that book in print. I sure didn’t have those kind of stories when I worked as a web designer.

Miriam: There's no job quite like bookselling, is there? Those are great answers. Can you give an example of when you felt a deep connection with a customer or the community?

Becca: When a kid comes in and says they like fairy tales and you realize that kid is exactly who you were as a small child. Then you give them a pile of books and they buy all of them and you’re like, yes, I’ve found mini-me! Or having someone call back or come in the next time and say, "What you gave me for my grandkid was exactly what I needed and they loved it".

Lori Robinson: I have a certain customer who I remember coming to our door during the pandemic and saying, “Just pick two books out for me, I’ll read anything you want." That trust is challenging. When I don’t know someone, I really want to take care of it and give people good choices. Anytime someone buys a book that I write a blog about, that warms my little heart. And I love when someone comes in and I think, I would never guess you’d read this book, and then they say, “I love this book!” I just love that we all get to like what we like.

Caitlin: One of our customers who loves short stories—having that customer come to me for recommendations is really nice, and an honor because she’s also a big reader, a school librarian, and a mother. I love sharing a common love of certain books with individual customers.

Nancy: Here's my quirky fact - This will be the second 50th anniversary of a bookstore I’ve attended this year. The other one I went to recently was for Red and Black Books, where I used to work with former Island Books bookseller Kay Wilson. I saw her there. Talk about long-time connections.

Lillian: I actually have a really clear one. Earlier this year, a mom came in and said that her queer child felt welcomed and happy to be at the store, and she was so thankful that her child had thought to mention how welcome they felt. I almost started to cry on the spot and it makes me tear up thinking about it. 

Miriam: That's amazing. It's nice to know that your experiences in the store are just as meaningful to you as they are to the customers. I love hearing this good stuff, and I’m also interested in hearing about a challenge you overcame.

Brad: At first I would have said, wrapping, and it’s something I didn’t expect. I had no idea! People on Mercer Island really know how to give gifts. Drawing quickly is also a challenge.

Caitlin: I wish more people would give books I like a try. People will come in and want to read whatever is the bestselling book. What I say is, “What are you in the mood to read?” and then go from there, because not everyone needs to read bestsellers or classics. They’re not in school. Read what you want.

Nancy: There are a lot of books! We like a lot of books, but more and more books come out and we don’t have the space to shelve everything. We can order it, but we can’t stock everything. So every quarter, it’s a huge challenge to say, these are the books we’re going to commit to. 

Lillian: The honest challenge is to stay interested after reading so many books over so many years. What I realize after I go through another season is that the books are different, that’s the great thing about books. Sometimes customers want the same thing over and over, and those things become classics and that’s fine, but for the majority of customers and definitely for me, I have to see what’s different, otherwise, it can get repetitive.

Miriam: Great answers that speak to so many years on the job. Here's another question. How would your colleagues describe you?

Brad: Friendly and kind, I would hope. A good listener.

Becca: Enthusiastic and willing. Laurie says I’m sassy. I'm also the youngest and got sucked into the social media part of things pretty quick, so I get a lot of the, hey, younger generation, technology, things.

Lori Robinson: I know that I’m pretty calm and unflappable when it comes to dealing with whatever you’ve got to deal with.

Caitlin: Oh, ha, here’s a note from Cindy about this question. She said I’m literary and quirky, and a name-dropper. And I was like, “Yeah…I think that’s pretty accurate.”

Nancy: Brilliant, friendly, kind to everyone, no-nonsense. You know. All the good stuff.

Lillian: I’m definitely the squeaky wheel. I guess what they’d say is that I get things done. That’s the thing. I get things done.

Miriam: These answers cracked me up (including the ones that aren't making it to print!). OK, let's do a fantasy question now. What would you do with it if someone gave you one million dollars to improve the book business and/or promote literacy?

Brad: Open more dream bookstores and do them the way I always wanted.

Becca: The industry is already diversifying the characters and cultures in books, and I’d find ways to support that. Everyone deserves to see themselves in what they read.

Lori Robinson: I’d love to do something to fight book bans. Working at the bookstore has opened my eyes to what banning books does, and I appreciate that it’s changed my view on experiencing things rather than being afraid of them.

Caitlin: I’d start with free nationwide healthcare for people earning under a certain amount of money. I grew up in a household filled with books, and I think it’s important for kids to grow up with their own books, and that takes parents earning a living wage. 

Nancy: This is because I’m such a nuts-and-bolts person, but I’d get rid of dust jackets and have everything be paper on board so that we have less damages to deal with. Saves money and they’re annoying.

Lillian: I’d reverse this trend of prices going up because that would make independent bookstores more accessible to people who shop online because it’s cheaper. There are people who can’t afford to shop in independent bookstores, and if you remove that barrier, it would just open up that handpicked-for-you element that can be so special for kids, and adults too.

Miriam: Ah, if only booksellers ran the world. How about this. If I were to work with you in the store for a month, what would I learn about bookstore life that I can’t possibly gather from a brief interview?

Becca: A lot of people don’t know that we get new releases every single Tuesday, or that we get books sent to us a week before they come out so we have them on the actual release day. So many books, all the time.

Caitlin: Customers are pretty savvy. Obviously, there’s that old idea that booksellers and librarians are just sitting around reading all day, but it’s not true, there’s a lot of work. It’s physical work, you’re constantly bending and putting things away.

Nancy: Well I’m sure everyone says, we do not have time to read while we’re working. They also might not know just how much we really know our customers. Sometimes when we’re going through a catalog, we’ll say, “Oh, I know who will like that book.” And we get that book for that particular person in our community. The two big trends in the past years are the normalization of queerness in fiction and nonfiction, so we really have a tiny LGBTQ section, because, there aren’t really any queer novels anymore—they’re mainstream. I love that. The other thing is Tiktok. It’s been crazy for us getting younger women and girls in the store. And we wish Tiktok could work that way for boys too. We now see these backlist authors getting a second wind because of Tiktok and that’s so interesting as a trend. The third thing that everyone is talking about is AI. One of the things that we have on our radar and it’s been coming up in the book world is fake books. We’re seeing them more and more in the travel and cookbook categories. Our job as curators is more important than ever. We’re working with reputable publishers, we’re looking at every book that comes in the store, we’re recommending books. I think with AI, people are becoming even more important. 

Lillian: How much time we spend just putting books away and tidying up and keeping things alphabetized. I can’t tell you how much we hum the alphabet to keep bookshelves in order. And working with me in particular, I’d say that I come across much more serious than I really am. 

Miriam: You all have to be so organized. Let's move on to my final question. What does being part of a small business within a community mean, and how do you play a role in it?

Brad: One of the best things about working at Island Books is how the community supports the store. And it’s not just about books. We’re a hub. About six months after I started, a woman came in and said her car wouldn’t start. Does anyone know how to jump a car? And I said, I can help. She didn’t know me, but she knew I worked at Island Books, so she knew we'd pitch in.

Becca: People are so committed to the small-town vibe here, everyone knowing each other. It’s so cool to see my colleagues interact with all these customers and they know their names and who they are. I also admire the way we work with other small businesses in the community. Everyone is invested in each other.

Lori Robinson: It’s funny for me, because I went to middle school and high school here, and I worked on the south end for longer than I care to admit, but all of that built a lot of relationships for me, the kind where you see people every day. It’s strange to have people to come in who have kids who were four when I met them and are now graduating from college and starting their careers. When I think about being part of a bookstore, I hope that there are some kids and regular customers who have felt like we’ve offered them a safe place and that I’ve personally been a safe person to talk to who they know won’t judge them or what they like to read. It means a lot to people when we remember them. I hope we offer a warm moment and a good experience.

Caitlin: With the exception of Laurie (and Becca, who is moving off-island), none of the staff lives on the island. So I guess we feel we’re representatives of the store and the community and it’s our responsibility to make people feel welcome.

Nancy: I feel like I have really grown with Mercer Island. I don’t live here, but I feel like I’ve really gotten to know this community. I worked for Roger for six years and I’ve worked for Laurie for almost seven, and we see kids grow up, we see people age, we have a lot of customers who have died over the years, and you’re kind of going through life cycles with people. We’ve seen the build up of Mercer Island, the businesses who are all working together now—it didn’t used to be like that. The community feels more like they appreciate their community too. I think our customers really stepped up during Covid and realized, we love this place, and we need it. They’ve been great.

Lillian: As the kids’ specialist, it’s different, because I spend a lot of time chatting with the community kids. I get to watch them grow up. There are people that come in who are going to high school that eight years ago I was recommending chapter books to. So, to have a hand in helping kids become life-long readers, and enhancing how important it is, is great. I always say I’m lucky to not be the teacher or parent because I don’t have to worry about the academics. I worry about, how can I make this kid love books so much that they will be a reader for the rest of their life?

Miriam: Right? That makes so much sense. Thanks, everyone. What a cool crowd. I adore all of you and am so glad you're in my life, and everyone else's!

Next week, for my final installment of 50 Years of Island Books, I'll be talking with the owner, Laurie Raisys, and it'll be a good one. See you soon.

—Miriam

#island books #Miriam landis #bookstore staff #lori robinson #Becca Oman #Cindy corujo #Caitlin luce baker #Lillian welch #Nancy Shawn #Brad Beshaw #50 Years of Island Books

[wallacejwriting]

Hello! Welcome to the blog. This is an updated intro. I've been here for a minute, just wanted to tidy things up.

I am Wallace, but I also like Wally and Lace just as much (and I generally refer to myself as Lace), so feel free to pick your preference! They/Them or He/Him pronouns, in that order.

This is my writing sideblog. My main blog is over at @lacependragon! I will follow, like, comment on posts, and send asks from there, but I post my writing here and I reblog writing stuff to this blog.

I'm a queer, autistic author with chronic illness/pain and a whole lot of wips. I'm Canadian. I've been writing over half my life (and when you're a couple years shy of 30, that's not bad!) and I was reasonably popular as a fanfic author (RWBY fics mostly), something I've largely stopped doing as of September, 2021.

I'm very passionate. Which is to say I have a Lot(TM) of opinions. And I refuse to take personality tests even if I love them for characters.

Also I really love writing programs. I don't think you need them to be a good author, whatsoever, but god I love them so much.

My Writing

I write basically two things: big ass, character driven, SFF series with tightly woven plots & relationships, plus ridiculous amounts of lore and worldbuilding; and romance novels. That's it. I'm pretty sure I'm better at the latter, which I think is cool.

Also: I have a lots of wips. I cycle between them regularly but I always come back around to the others eventually.

I can sum up my writing as such:

Mostly SFF with a focus on fantasy and scifantasy

Character focused and driven

Often relationship driven - family, friendship, romance, etc.

Almost all of my protagonists are they/them NBs or some other flavour of trans

Mainly queer, disabled, neurodivergent characters

Queer and trans focused romances, also polycules

Found family, slow burn romance, platonic bonds, redemption arcs, overcoming adversity & trauma

Gray morality and tough decisions

Intricate world-building, in-depth magic systems, lots of fantasy creatures, and details on how these things interact with everyday and overarching life

Puns. A lot of puns.

A lot of silly combo words I use as a shortcut to avoid conlanging unnecessarily (though I do LOVE a good conlang)

Listen there's a lot of apocalypses in my WIPs. And overcoming them. It's a theme. It's because of the state of the world. Roll with it.

The Blog

What can you expect on this blog?

Character intros, WIP intros, worldbuilding posts, magic building posts, lore posts, and more

Lots of rambling posts about my WIPs, in general, and progress updates as I draft them

Screenshots and discussions of writing programs, including Scrivener, Word, Excel, Plottr, Aeon Timeline, Scapple, Powerpoint, Illustrator (for maps), Clip Studio Paint (for maps), Photoshop (for nonsense), and Notepad++

Snippets and chapters from various drafts of various WIPs

Inspiration posts for various WIPs

Reblogs of other writeblrs I think are great

Tips, tricks, and advice I picked up from my own experiences as a writer

Rambles about writing, the universe, and my process

Non-Writing Tag: #wall talk

The WIPs

[Under the cut because oh my goodness this is getting long]

Main Projects

THE METAHUMAN INITIATIVE Book One: Descent

Series Overview Urban fantasy, mystery/thriller, suspense, adult. Long as fuck.

Nat Carter is drawn to Veda City, a place built to uncover the secrets of superpowers in Metahumans, after the violent and mysterious death of their family. Once there, they set out to uncover who killed their family, why, and how it boosted Nat's own powers, only to realize that the conspiracy is far deeper than they ever imagined. And, somehow, Nat might be at the centre of it all.

Links: WIP Post | Series Tag | Book One Tag | Series Playlist | Book One Playlist | Character Profiles | Book One Excerpts

BEURKRATTI: THE PLACE OF STONES

Series Overview High fantasy, urban/constructed fantasy, adventure, mystery, adult. Multiple connecting series.

The changing world brings forgotten history forward. The Wardens, the protectors of the world, struggle to find the source of the faltering ancient magic that is causing widespread destruction. Old gods and new are risen in the Free Cities, and nothing is as it seems. For a young Warden, Katya, an opportunity arises to seek the answers for her people's inevitable spiral into nothingness, only to find far more than she ever bargained for.

Currently Undergoing Major Revisions

Links: WIP Post [Being Updated] | Series Tag | Book One Tag [TBA] | Spotify Playlist [None]

BOOK OF FARSIDE Book One: City of Fractured Dreams

Series Overview Scifantasy, apocalypse, adventure, mystery/suspense, adult. Series.

A floating, island city suffocated by civil unrest is thrown into deeper and more violent turmoil after the return of the apocalypse kills its elite fighting force in one fell swoop. Everyone seeking power leaps at the chance to seize it, all while ignoring the dark fate that made it possible. Amidst it all, two siblings, separated by eight years and an entire city, struggle to find one another and not lose themselves in the process.

Links: WIP Post | Series Tag | Ramble Tag | Book One Tag | Spotify Playlist

PATHS MADE OF STARDUST

Series Overview Fantasy, magic school, mystery/suspense, young adult. Series.

Every year, new witches flock to one of the many witch colleges across Mokeno. This year, three students arriving at Starmont College will cross paths for more than just classes. Two first-year students discover a third is held captive by her father's illegal curses and fight to free her from his grasp. If they succeed, they can bring down one of the most corrupt men in the country. If they fail, getting caught will be the least of their problems.

Links: WIP Post [Being Updated] | Series Tag | Book One Tag [TBA] | Spotify Playlist [None]

RESTORING MOONBLOOM HOLLOW

Series Overview Romance, fantasy romance, polyamory, adult. Companion series.

A dying trading post on an abandoned road receives new life when a poorly worded ad tricks an alchemist into moving to the town. Unfortunately, Arlo is not the saviour Moonbloom Hollow was looking for. Two townspeople, Samir and Winnie, don't let Arlo's grumpy exterior stop them, however. They are determined to save their town, and Arlo is determined to save themself. Maybe, working together, everyone can get what they need, and maybe fall in love along the way.

Links: WIP Post [Being Made] | Series Tag | Book One Tag | Spotify Playlist [None]

Side Projects/Minor Projects

Supernova | wip post | tag Urban fantasy, contemporary, young adult. Standalone 15-year-old Andie has never belonged. Bounced from foster home to foster home, they figure they’ll leave the system when they age out. An encounter after school one day awakens powers Andie never knew they had and quickly turns their life upside down. A foster home that cares, foster parents who know their struggles, a new school, and even new friends. But where did Andie come from? And how did they get here? They need to know, or they’ll never be able to rest.

Ghostpossible | wip post | tag Urban fantasy, new adult. Standalone When Y2K hit, it tore open a portal through the ether, letting ghosts, spooks, and all sorts of monsters through. Sixty years later, the best people to tackle the dead and ghastly are the young, and Kai Yeung, part time college student and full-time big sibling, is trying to make it big in the ghost hunting live streaming business. Money is tight, and this is their best option. Until a guy named Archie shows up and reveals that he’s been possessed by an ancient magical artifact and the very grumpy warrior trapped inside it. If Kai can get the artifact off, they can sell it and provide for their sister for years to come, but that’s only if they can get it off Archie before those chasing him can catch up.

Demon Fuckers Anonymous | wip post | tag Fantasy, dark academia, new adult, erotica. Standalone. A disabled student in their upper years at a prestigious, elitist, bullshit academy for magical grad school struggles to keep up due to exhaustion and ableism. To get back on track, they summon a demon in hopes of getting him to help. But the summon uncovers a deep conspiracy beneath the bowels of the school, and a long pent up desire to connect with someone, mind and body.

Queer Witch Cozies | wip post | tag Urban fantasy, cozy mystery, romance, adult. Series Ciar Gallagher can find things no one else can, that’s their talent as a witch. So when a frantic man comes to the door one night begging for Ciar’s help, they’re pretty sure they can do it. But there’s two problems. One, the man is a regular human, one with no knowledge of magic, and two, he’s asking Ciar to find his kidnapped daughter, and Ciar’s never tracked a person before.

Care Home for Chosen Ones | wip post | tag Urban fantasy, contemporary, adult. Standalone 25-year-old Marlowe takes great pride in their career as a care worker at Sunrise Elder Care, especially in their chats with the remaining chosen ones of a long finished prophecy. But when strange shadows begin to haunt the care home, Marlowe must summon all their knowledge and their most trusty weapon – the push broom – in order to stop the returning Dark One and save the elder chosen ones and their home before it’s too late.

Persephone Project | wip post | tag Science fiction, mystery/thriller, adult. Standalone Five years ago, Axl Thorn was arrested aboard the U.S.S. Faraday for techno-terrorism and multiple counts of first degree murder. Now, the cybernetic attacks have made a resurgence, but this time someone else is behind the keyboard. Pulled out of holding to help, Axl is kept on a short leash by their pissed off personal guard, whose job is both to keep Axl out of trouble – hah! – and to keep others from attacking them. Yet as the attacks grow stronger, the unlikely allies must cast aside their differences if they have any hope of saving the station and all those it connects to.

#writeblr #my wips #my writing #writing intro #writeblr intro #updated intro

[k00297230]

Hello you disruptive daisies!

What does DISRUPT mean to me?

Disrupt is..

Entering new environments.

Adapting to my surroundings.

Building new comfort zones.

Losing said comfort zones.

Severed ties.

To give context to my project, when I was 9 me and my family moved from Ireland to go and live in Australia. This was exciting yet bittersweet to me. We spent almost 5 years living in the entirely different Australia. Then we moved back. I had to leave the life I built there, my friends, school and some family to return to a place I once called home. A home which was familiar yet entirely foreign to me. For this project I wanted to convey this narrative with many joined pieces, with the initial plan of constructing an installation.

I also wanted to tell a story and keep my pieces in a chronological order. This starts with leaving Ireland to go to Australia. An exciting time for me, with the most uplifting tonal piece out of the bunch. My painting would represent this, my still life. On my last day of school my class brought me a goodbye gift in the form of a picture book and those little kid pots of paints with the low quality brush to go along with it. I wanted to do a still life representative of this. I chose to do a still life because I wanted to illustrate how simple and straightforward life was before moving.

The next piece consists of my 3D printed face. For this I wanted to depict how overwhelming things were for me when being placed in a new environment. Perhaps exaggerated, I burned and melted my face and took pictures of it before editing it on photoshop. If I had more time with this piece I may have printed another face and been bolder with how I melted it. I would’ve liked it if it was more disrupted in that sense but either way I don’t mind how it turned out.

The one on the right is a bit more of a retrospective look on this time, with the layered faces on top providing a feel of distorted identity. Looking back, being in Australia definitely changed how I see things and interact with people now.

The next piece is my animation. This was a sort of settling down in my new life in Australia. Building up something new for myself, and a calm acceptance. The beach was always something close to us in Australia. When I think of my time there it’s the first thing that pops into my mind, as well as the heat. I want the waves to almost calm me in this piece as the eye awakens anxiously and then saddened. The clap is almost like a wake up call of, hey I’m here let’s make the most of it, and then calm. I’m quite happy with this piece and how it turned out. I think I could’ve prepared for it a bit more in storyboarding and timing things but I quite like the end result.

Then there’s my 3D piece. The hand and the clock. This represents finding out and having to leave my new home to return back to Ireland. This is where I severed ties. I definitely wanted to represent the time zone difference between here and Australia, which is like 8 hours around. I did this with the clock which I originally wanted to use as a pedestal to hoist up the other pieces in the installation. Around the clock are some plane tickets I made in Illustrate which summarised my overall feelings on the situation. Above the clock I was going to hang my arm and separated from it my hand. This would represent the lack of agency I had in the choices of moving and how things were out of my hands. The hands have waxed on photographs of my time in Ireland to give a sense of nostalgia trapped in a layer of wax to give an almost frozen over, trapped in time feel. I originally wanted to make two arms and two hands but with the time I had I figured I’d do better with one. The hands also were supposed to fit the hands of the clock, not connected and lacking the power to control it. The hand and arm didn’t turn out how I’d hoped but if I had more time I would continue to work on them. I’m quite happy with the way I did the clock although I maybe would’ve like to have glued on custom passports onto it, Australian and Irish to add more visual interest in it. It was originally supposed to just be a pedestal though.

#Youtube

[applesap-fics]

Day 31 - Butterfly

G, 988 words, Isabela & Abuela & Antonio

-- Final entry ✨

Just as she’s finished with the facepaint on little Cecilia ⁠— who has chosen a pink unicorn shooting sparkles onto a field of unsuspecting flowers, an excellent choice ⁠— Isabela sees her grandmother and nephew approach the stand she’s set up at the plaza. She’s got a table with her makeup, some pollen in jars and bowls, and cute examples for the kids to choose from before they have their faces painted. 

“Abuela!” she greets. 

“Isabela!” Antonio yells. He drags their grandmother by the arm, but she leisurely walks at her own pace. 

As the two approach, Cecilia says thanks to Isabela and waves all of the Madrigals good day, skipping off to the next booth for a game.

“Ah, you were painting the children?” Abuela asks. Isabela nods a bit hesitantly, unsure if her grandmother truly approves. She’s doing it for the Encanto, to provide some entertainment, but it’s really just sitting around drawing pictures all day.

“You too, Abuela!” Antonio decides and points for her to sit on the empty stool.

“Oh, no,” Abuela chuckles.

“Yes!”

Isabela smiles, at that instant deciding she should team up with her little nephew. “What would you like, Abuela?” she asks.

“Oh, no,” her grandmother refuses again. “Not for me. For Antonio!” she deflects.

“No, Abuela, it’s for you! If I have to look silly all day, so do you.” Antonio’s word is firm for a 5-and-a-half-year-old. Or maybe it’s because he’s five that he can talk to their grandmother like that.

Isabela tries a softer route, in case Abuela will get fed up with them both, which would dampen their moods.

“Hm, how about a butterfly?” she offers, presenting one of the illustrations to Abuela before she can protest some more. She’s drawn the butterflies on a lot of children that afternoon. They’re quite relaxing to draw. Tiny ones around the eyes, giant ones that cover entire faces with bright wings on each side, and slender caterpillar bodies running up their noses. She’s joking, a little; her Abuela wouldn’t choose something so bold to walk around with all day. 

“I think,” Antonio intercepts, looking over the rest of the examples, “you should do something that’s really meaningful. Isa, can you draw condors? They’re huge birds and basically rulers of the sky, and Abuela is really important. Or- Hey, what’s your favorite anima, Abuela?”

Alma smiles at her grandson. She sits down on the stool and takes him up her lap. 

“Hmm,” she hums, looking over the illustrations, from the butterflies to the horses to the many flower arrangements, Isabela’s favorites. She lingers especially on the hydrangeas, a bigger abstract piece that Isabela drew more for its complex composition than to be used as a temporary drawing on a child’s cheek. Isabela thinks, worries a little, that Abuela wants to pick that one after all, but then she moves on to another illustration of galloping horses and playing monkeys, carefully looking them over with a pensive expression as she holds the paper in her hand. “These are very well made.”

“Thank you, Abuela. I’ve been practicing.”

“Which one do you like best?” she asks. 

Isabela thinks it over for a second, then points at the big abstract flower arrangement her abuela just held. “This one.” She hesitates. She wonders if Abuela’s changed her mind about not having her face painted. “Do you want me to draw these on you?”

She can try to replicate the intricate details of the colorful blossoms layering over each other in perfect aureoles, but it’ll probably take some time and spacial calculating. She regrets bringing the drawing with her. It was silly to show off with it, considering she knew mostly kids would be coming to her stand and that they wouldn’t choose something so big and intricate over a fun animal. But Abuela is a different story. She’ll be disappointed if-

“Oh, no. Let’s do something small. You, well…” Abuela puts a finger to her lip. It’s almost a strange gesture, something Isabela hasn’t often seen from her grandmother, especially directed towards her. “It doesn’t have to be perfect.”

Isabela smiles. Her shoulders slump, relieved. “No, not at all. We can do something small. And it doesn’t have to be on your face if you don’t want to.”

“Aw,” Antonio says.

“How about on your hand? And which one do you like best?”

“Yeah,” Antonio pipes up, “what’s your favorite animal, Abuela?”

“Well,” Abuela says and points to a small illustration of a group of butterflies. They’re drawn from the side in various stages of flight, each one showing off a different pattern on its wings. Simple, but effective enough for the kids. “I like butterflies very much. They are small and delicate and perfect the way they are. Your grandfather Pedro liked to write about them-” her grandchildren both perk up at the mention of their abuelo. “And on my hand, if you like, Isabela. Then I can see them.”

Pride swells in her chest. Abuela doesn’t want them on her face because it’d be childish, she wants to see Isabela’s art. 

She takes up her brush and palette and gets to work.

She doesn’t need to be told that Abuela wants three of them. It’s obvious. They fly up the curve of her thumb to the knuckle of her pointer finger, towards wherever Abuela guides her ever-gesturing hand. In order, she colors them blue, yellow, and green.

Isabela has no line of children waiting anymore. Everyone’s been painted. Antonio isn’t in a hurry either and is content with talking their ears off about the new friends he’s made that week. So, for good measure and because it’s nice and relaxing, another yellow butterfly follows and another blue one joins the group. 

It’s a good day. They talk about nothing much. Abuela basks in the sun and chimes in with stories of her own.

The other hand, Isabela adorns with six butterflies more.

✨

#encanto #encantober #abuela madrigal #isabela madrigal #antonio madrigal #alma madrigal #i didnt expect antonio to be in this many stories