#idk man. just thinkin about it.

[sage-nebula]

Thinking about how my top 3 favorite female Sonic characters are all IDW originals and wondering how much of that has to do with the fact that a woman (Evan) was/is heavily involved in their creation and writing.

#the characters are Whisper - Tangle - and Surge btw. if you're wondering. #it just made me wonder how many women have been involved in writing the Sonic games over the years #but when I search ''how many women are on Sonic team'' nothing comes up #and everyone who is mentioned as having written for the games are all men #which isn't necessarily a bad thing! men can write women characters well if they try #I mean Ian Flynn is a man and he also had a huge hand in the comics (obviously) and did right by Amy in Frontiers etc #but like . . . Amy has been handled atrociously in past games. and so much of her design revolves around her being a LI for Sonic #to the point where *the only reason she was made at all* is bc Sega wanted Sonic to have a LI #and then you look at Rouge's . . . everything. how she was only made to be 18 so they could get away with sexualizing her #Blaze and Cream are fine but they're much more minor compared to Rouge and especially Amy #idk. again men can write woman characters obviously. anyone can write anyone if they try #but like. you look at Rouge and you know it was a man who designed her #but you look at Whisper or Surge and you know a woman was the lead behind those designs #idk man. just thinkin about it. #also don't take this as Rouge hate bc it's not. she's my 4th fave Sonic lady #but it's just. you know what the thought process behind her was #and it's very exasperating even tho i love her despite it

[godbirdart]

"are you a good person" i don't know, am i?? i don't think i get to just Decide that for myself

#thinkin about the time some dude asked me this #and clearly he had never been presented with this third secret option that wasnt a vague yes or no #idk man i am just tryin my best

[esaari]

honk

#idk if this fandom is alive anymore but here's burnt toast man #shall i tag this shit.......... sure lets tag this shit #payday 2 #payday #hoxton #was thinkin about how therell be another one of these games and felt the sudden urge to draw the fave again #payday tumblr sure was fun to be part of back in the day #anyways i'm off to bed... been insanely tired today and hopefully i'll get to some of the art on my to do list #tomorrow i meant to say. hope to get to it tomorrow lol #i have some nice ones there. though. mostly ones i won't be able to post here lmfao #maybe throw in oc with pride flag thing on this list so i'll have sth posting worthy. #in a non related note at the end here i just finished playing tlou on the pc and it was so much fun... never did finish it on the console #just watched others play through it #i smell an AU but i'll keep that to myself because whomst cares #honk honk good night

[iknowicanbutwhy]

Monkey King VS Monkie Kid! Who will win? Probably not the kid who doubts his ability to win and has the lives of everyone in the world resting on his shoulders.

I looked at @xynnoix 's AU and went "oooooh, angsty," and I thought of this idea and went "oooooh, angsty," and I looked at how many panels I couldn't keep from drawing and went "oooooh, angsty," which is really just my thing, you know?

#kinda went ham on those backgrounds #fbdkvnf couldn't help it though this au has me excited #and I got to practice backgrounds to woop woop #i was just thinkin when i drew this about just how horrifying it is to have such an amazing weapon with great powers that could i dunno #turn the tides of the world ending #and then have those powers negated and your own weapon used to trap you #like... ouch man. wounded pride. #dunno what MK would be trapped for though because ive listened to the playlist and its like.. quite a few songs about MURDER #I guess LBD was all like hoo hoo hoo you look so pitiful i cant believe i thought you were a threat and MK is all :( so LBD just ices him #but.. non-lethally IDK #art #fanart #monkie kid #Throne of Bones au #xynnoix #kitscribbles #lmk fanart #lego monkie kid #monkie kid sun wukong #monkey king #possessed monkey king #lmk sun wukong #monkie kid au

[biohazard-inevitable]

Hair

They say that hair holds stories, that the style is what makes a man.

They say long locks make you a pansy and a real man should have it short lest they be mistaken for a girl.

Where I grew up, every man buzzed their hair down.

It was a shame for it to be long and shaggy, and mothers would fuss over you, insisting upon a haircut.

For girls, it was fine.

They could have hair as long as they wanted or as short as they needed, so long as it wasnt buzzed as short as a man’s.

Being anything else just wasn’t a thing round these parts where churches chimed every sunday, pastors clammoring around resturants and filling their quotas in a single lunch.

So I buzzed mine.

I tried as hard as I could to seem as manly as possible

To appear as bull of a brute as any cowboy should.

I wore all the boy things and had all the short boy hair.

My scalp was sensitive anyways, so I thought it didn’t bother me.

It was better shorter.

Wasnt it?

I still gazed and clammored about the anime boys I saw on screen or in Otome games though.

I gushed about how pretty they were with hair down their backs like a silken curtain, or whipping wild through the air like the mane of a lion.

Legolas was never deemed as not manly enough

Beither was Zen or inuyasha or the undertaker.

A crush, I supposed.

Because of course thats all it was.

I was a gay little boy with gay little crushes and my type was men with long, Beautiful hair.

Right?

My hair was a dull, discolored brown from the shimmering blonde it used to be, the blonde I remember from kindergarten.

I tried to return to that blonde with bleach.

My school didnt allow unnatural colors, so anything was better than that matted, oily brown.

Shaved short and as platinum as a ken doll, I should have been as man as ever.

4 years, I stayed like that, and while the short hair was easy to take care of, I felt as hideous as a pile of sludge.

It didnt matter if I was loved for my looks, I supposed.

Wouldn’t that be too vain of me?

Boys weren’t supposed to care about what they looked like, they werent supposed to coo and admire Beautiful hair or seethe in jealousy that their sister looked so much better and has such long, goregous hair.

It wasn’t until after high school that I began to explore.

Covid let me grow my hair out more, though I still trimmed the sides.

I let my bangs grow long and shaggy over my face, like a veil to hide me from the world.

Eventually I dyed it again, this time going with that green I had always wanted to try, the one I had seen on my favorite youtuber growing up, fluffy and emerald.

Still, for years more, I kept it short. Only allowing that fringe to hover over me as some sort of style.

Recently though, I’ve realized I want that hair that those anime men had.

I want that soft curtain rolling down my back like waves of an ebony river, flecks of mossy green dotting it like a miasma of toxin flowing through the oily black stream.

I want the hair like the ring girl

The people around me are foolish and prudent to think the length of ones hair makes you more or less of a man.

I know that now, and I’m glad I do.

I want to stop pretending not to like things

#long post #personal #idk what else to tag #hair #trans #transgender #just thinkin about How different i treat my hair these days #its more beautiful than its ever been and keeps being beautiful #i’ve been dying it for 8 years now #and i wouldnt change a thing #except maybe the length #ive always loved long hair #i just mever felt like i was allowed to have it as a man #because i was worried it would make me less masculine #and to some people it does #i get called ma’am a lot #even with my chin scruff #i have a high voice when i speak to customers #but none of that matters #this area wont recognize me no matter what i do #so im just gonna do things i like #and hope that those i love will respect me and how i wish to be called #which i know they will

[reinabeestudio]

Tfw the wind blows your hat away AGAIN and you gotta go find it in the middle of a blizzard atop a mountain by yourself

#pokepasta #snow on mt silver #fnf #friday night funkin #hypno's lullaby #fan art #my art #frozen red #sorry for the dumbass text AHAHAHJSBDFHJ i had to do it #chachalaco ramble incoming. you've been warned -> #trying to figure out this Red so he doesn't look like Glitchy lol #And I wondered. maybe hair looks a bit more disheveled?? #since i already apply the hc of longer hair to Glitchy (but perhaps shorter ends idk) #so maybe frozen Red also has longer hair but not as much. maybe he needs a comb /j #im still giving that jacket to him btw why tf is he wearing no warm clothes up THERE!!!! #i was just thinkin about this guy for a bit... like. 3 years on a freezing mountain?? by yourself?? #ik this is the pokepasta one so he just. Dies AJKNFDJKS #but idk man that utter isolation must had affected him in some way. Isn't he tired? Physically I mean. But i guess mentally too #as someone that went thru smth similar (isolation not. climbing a mountain and being there for 3 years(???). Such an experience changes you #For a very long time. sometimes even forever. it takes time to be social again and get used to people #(although in my case was 4 years not 3. not relevant tho AHAHAHJDS) #isn't that crazy too. you climb this mountain in johto and some 20 year old is already there--oh shit what the fuck the kanto champion #these thoughts can be applied to canon Red too i guess🤔 (excluding the uh. dying in mt silver part AHAHAHJDSBFHJ) #it's JUST!!! -shakes this man- for heaven's sake stop isolating yourself holy shit it's worrying #Also add the fact he's probably famous in some way right?? or at least Known. guy became Champion at a rather young age #I mean no wonder he barely talks when he's present in other games. I know its for the ''haha silent protagonist'' joke but. HMMMMMM #maybe I can self-project /lh. a silent guy that mostly communicates thru short sounds or gestures (like a nod or shaking his head) #and only actually talks when he's more comfortable with whoever is talking to him. mostly short sentence but he opens up a bit more #Oh god I went fucking. Thesis Mode on Red i'm so sorry AHAHJDSFHJDS

[bamtwozled]

dan and phil crafts - slime // moscow by autoheart

#thinkin about it….. #there’s somethin here about. moscow being one of their happiest songs #and the music video leaning heavily on both that and queer defiance #that I think connects really well to the themes of dnp crafts #somethin about making a space for yourself in a world that has rejected you by reclaiming what others find evil #idk man I just work here #dan and phil #dan and phil crafts #danandphilcrafts #I know that he loves me…..also a contender #same double meaning of I know that he/He loves me except He in this case is uhhh not god #but also the imagery in the bridge

[highcaliberstupidity]

CW - Character Injury | Descriptions of Wounds | Minor operation in the middle of no where on said bullet wound | Blood | The usual CoD violence to be expected

So, looking at Soap during 'Alone', i'm fairly certain that the bullet wound in his arm is a through and through.

HOWEVER. It's a good thing I don't care and will bend the narrative to explore little things. So strap in.

I really, really love the idea of Soap fighting his way through Las Almas with a bullet lodged in his arm and a graze on his ribs (someone dug up his Alone model and found he had a wound on his flank). By the time he makes it out, the wounds are throbbing. He is in agony, and he knows infection will set in if he doesn't get them cared for soon. But they have to escape first, so he bites his tongue and sweats through the pain while still shaking with the frigid cold of rain-soaked clothing in a truck with no heater.

Finally, between blood loss, frantic shivering, and general fucking exhaustion, he starts to pass out, and Ghost finds a secluded place to pull off as he realizes just how bad his Sergeant is.

He's surprisingly gentle as he maneuvers him around until he can stand between his legs in the passenger door, stripping his shirt off and slapping his med kit down in his lap. All the while he's cussing him up, down, and sideways for not saying something sooner as he shoves a small, cracked, and ruined piece of leather into his hand.

He takes off his gloves, soaks his hands in alcohol, and gets to work. Soap will blame it on the heat of the moment, but as Ghost works on his flank, he falls into him, pressing his head into his shoulder as he bites down on that piece of leather and tries not to scream aloud, hot tears of shame burning down his cheeks.

He nearly passes out when Ghost has to dig the bullet from the edge of his bicep, fisting his hand into the side of his rain-soaked hoodie.

Soap's too out of it to see Ghost slip the malformed lump of lead into his tac vest when he pulls it out, dripping crimson. Ghost sews him up, shoves meds down his throat, and lets him catch as much rest as possible while he drives, heading for Alejandro's safe house.

--

Ghost forgets about the bullet he kept until they return to England following the shitshow in Chicago.

He finds it on accident when cleaning out his tac vest before sending it off to be properly cleaned up and the armor plate replaced. For a long moment, he contemplates throwing it away, because why should he keep it?

Why did he keep it in the first place?

For some reason, he dumps it out of the pouch and into his hand, noting the dark stains around where it'd settled. He tries not to think about how red Johnny's blood had been on his hands when he'd dug the damn thinged loose.

He takes it back to his room and leaves it in his bedside drawer.

Every once and a while he sees it, remembers it exists, and contemplates throwing it away again. The memories it holds aren't good ones, lumpy metal covered in rusty stains.

But it's a piece of Johnny, in a fucked up and morbid way, and he can't bring himself to get rid of it.

--

It's a long time, before Johhny finds it.

Ghost had forgotten about it again, lost it in the limbo of his thoughts between missions and protecting him.

He asks where something else, and Ghost, not really paying attention, answers on autopilot from where he sits at his desk, filling out paperwork from their last mission.

"Bed side table."

He hears it open, hears some shifting. He'd never really kept that damn thing clean, one of his few bad habits. The sounds stop, and Ghost, pays it no mind for a moment.

But then it drags, and drags.

When he turns around to ask if he'd found it, he sees him cupping his hands, staring down at a small, malformed lump of lead with confusion. He's pretty sure his heart tries to leap from his ribs, climbing halfway up his throat in a matter of moments.

Soap lifts his head, and it must be the expression on Ghost's face that gives him away.

"You kept it...?"

"Honestly, kinda forgot about it."

"But why?" And wasn't that a fucking question? It wasn't big enough to be a paperweight, it was covered in long-dried blood, and useless.

Why had he kept it?

"I, don't know. Just, felt important." They'd been together for years now, he'd figured this wouldn't make so many nerves dance.

"Can't believe you had a piece of me that entire time and I never knew about it." Ghost blinks, remembering when he'd thought of it like that, how he still thought of it. A smile curls across his face under his mask.

"Yeah, suppose I did Sergeant. Suppose I did."

#soapghost #ghoap #ghost x soap #soap x ghost #john soap mactavish #simon ghost riley #ghost #cod soap #cod ghost #character injury #somewhat possessive behavior #look man #he just #wants a piece of his mans #even whenn he wasn't his mans yet #idk where this came from but i've just been #kinda thinkin' about it a lot today. #calibers writing

[shevr]

literally said 'God Damn!!!' out loud at that selfie you are soo pretty

thank u very much im glad i could push you to blasphemy

#& thanks as well to every other nice comment that was left on this post mwah mwah mwa #honestly i strongly believe that 90% of how cute i look on this selfie was caused by some stuff getting blurred out in the process #and 9% extra by my hair hiding most my face anyway #my brow ridge's massive and the corners of my jaw are nasty ive been feeling not too great about all that lately #i appreciate peopl online thinkin im pretty in the pictures i present them sorry if i sound like a douche about it #it's just i don't know if they really are a good representation of reality it feels like a lucky strike idk idk #i have massive self loathing issues i have not even begun trying to fix yet man idunno. #ill go listen to more car seat headrest & midwest emo bullshit surely that ll help #god i wish i could write music i wish i could make songs. #how do words work. how do people just use those #shevr

[aeriedwelling]

thinks about atmos and gender i use he/him pretty exclusively for him but he does also use it/its and they/them and he is agender

empires clone atmos probably wouldn't correct you if you called him a "boy" or "a man" because he's a clone of a man so that's...technically correct?

space/d&d atmos would absolutely correct you if you use gendered terms for him. he doesn't mind stuff like "bro", "dude", "girl", "some guy", etc but he doesn't like being called "sir" or "man" or most gendered terms. he isn't mad about it but is pretty persistent about correcting people every time they slip up.

#idk man. im thinkin about. yeah #specifically the phrase 'we need to go talk to the mothman' #he's not a man or a boy or a girl he's a moth #so just. 'we need to go talk to the moth' #idk. im not consistent with this at all but i have feelings about it sjldkfjsdlf #oc atmos phere #he's not even really a moth to me. he's atmos #that's. idk. there's no gender no species he's just him.

[brainrotdotorg]

.

#not to get sappy on main but like #tw for mentions of suicide #i am. so gald i didnt kill myself forever ago lmao #i handed homemade cookies out to perfect stranger in the elevator #because they mentioned that they were craving something sweet #and i just happened to have somethign sweet #a girl smiled at me while she was waiting for the elevator later in the day #and i thought hey lets keep it going #i said this is weird but would you like a cookie. i made too many. #and she said sure #i dont know if she liked it or not but i have one less cookie and someone else has one more #and i went to dinner with my club tonight and shared them there #and i drew and had a nice time #im still single on valentines day and even though i thought id be alone forever im like. not #im sorry this isnt what you guys followed me for but like. man #im thinkin about it. #keep living because you could get to give someone a cookie and maybe itll make their night idk. #thank god i failed!

[gilmores-glorious-blog]

okay but why did sam riegel accidentally create the most compelling storyline for any queer character in all of critical role with taryon darrington??

#thinkin about. “in all the books i've read they never tell of the adventurers who go to bed with older men.” #idk just something about this guy who wants nothing more than to be the knight in shining armor #down to the rescuing damsels and all #but he feels like he’ll never be able to because he’s gay #but then he DOES #like. yes he’s obnoxious and self-centered about it but he does become a real adventurer goddamnit! and he gets the guy in the end <3 #anyways i am thinking tary thoughts again i love this stupid man so much #critical role #taryon darrington #eli.posts

[venvellan]

obsessed with the idea of an elven baldurian tav that was vaguely aware of astarion, before or after his death. the Strong opinions you could have if you knew anything about him before he died. or if you had family that was "in the know" for any reason, you'd have been on your guard in the city because there are vampires about and people have been disappearing. jaheira killed one outside her home, it's not entirely unlikely that more people in the gate would know about them, though it wouldn't be common knowledge.

baldur's gate is a huge city, so even IF you'd seen one of the spawn in person it's unlikely it would've been him, but i'm imagining something like "astarion, i saw you in x place at x time," "be grateful i didn't see you." yknow?

#just something im thinkin about idk #you wouldnt have to be elven to have heard about or seen one of the spawn #you'd just have no way of knowing abt him previous to that #cannot stop thinking about him #love you astarion #life gets better i promise #bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #astarion #will i ever move on from this man

[wabblebees]

im like if the most useless boytoy twink was also an incredibly handy butch lesbian

#this post is about me collapsing as soon as i got home from work #where i used a garden hoe i sharpened myself to hack down+tear out a truly impressive thistle 3× my size while 3 of my coworkers watched #swung it overhead like an axe until the centre stalk (almost the size of my wrist) was felled. then hoed around it until the roots came free #& i could grab it with my hands where there werent any thorns. turned around and all 3 of em were lookin at me like 😳😳 lmao #but now im sitting in my bathtub bc i cant stand long enough to shower anymore hdksgsk #knew this morning it was a bad pain day but pushed thru it anyway bc!! there was work to do!! but now im gonna be totally useless for 24hrs #cest la vie i suppose #after the thistle was properly disposed of just kept tilling+weeding+fixin tomato cages in the fields. came home & felt sooo dykey+hot lmfao #was like ''fuck yeah man idk what was up with me this morning im feelin fine now! great even!'' #then took my knee braces off to get into the shower & almost busted my ass on the tile when both of em gave out🤦 #my shoulders are now reminding me that i Dont Have the muscle mass to use a bigass hoe like anything but a hoe w/out Paying For It later #its a good thing i have the day off tomorrow bc im going to turn into a slug as soon as im done steaming meself like a little dumpling #definitely thinkin about using my pathetic-wet-cat-charm to get someone to bring me food tonight tho... hmm #anyway. wheres that post #''im not a butch but i believe their beliefs'' #its my exectution thats lacking lmao. but in any case #mwah. mwah mwah mwah #<-for all the butches out there. ily tysm youre wonderful #and to all the useless boytoy twinks out there: o7 <3 #godspeed fellow hopeless fags. ily too. keep doin what yr doin lmao #bee speaks

[kiwibirdlafayette]

Tom “I need people who geniunely care about me to cling onto as i go on wherever to feel okay” Syndicate and Jordan “i have to hold onto whoever and whatever i currently have cause if that goes away im nothing” CaptainSparklez, my favorite power couple <333

#/lh idk im just thinkin #related to last reblog #i didnt wanna put this gay ass shit in ops replies #exploring this dynamic has been my favorite part about writing the pre-Isles storyline #the split between the two comes directly from tom needing to keep jordan by his side but jordan not wanting to throw his past away #even if its killing him #anyway #syndisparklez #mianite by a gay man #(so its not maintagged. makin that one now #captainsparklez #tom syndicate

[mx24]

Snowgrave Spamton...

#mx rambles #weird route #[ ok anyways thinkin about he n Kris n how he just. almost doesn't acknowledge them as a person in that route. like shit. does he even see #Them or just Us? he says sponge n that stuff but... he never actually says Kris' name. he probably doesn't even know it. nor did he likely #even want to. whether to deny them any personhood n so he feels no guilt or because he just never Saw Them to begin with in the Weird Route. #gah man... ] #[ idk y i drafted these thoughts lmao also this was partially spurred on by another post ]