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seblos · 4 years

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there’s not a star in heaven that we can’t reach - ch 6/10

chapter title: and it’s been a long time since someone gave me a shot

word count: 9,344

notes: tw // panic attacks

read on ao3

Carlos wakes up the following Monday more excited to start the school day than he’s ever been since the first day of freshman year.

Truly, he hasn’t felt this level of nerves mixed with excitement since he first walked into East High. All that day had brought him anyway was the cruel truth that high school isn’t at all like the movies when you’re an outcast.

Today, though. Today had promise. They had been texting and talking all weekend, but neither had been able to find the time to see each other in person before school. If homecoming was just the start of the new chapter in his and Seb’s relationship, then Carlos couldn’t wait to keep reading.

He walks into school with a little bit of a quicker pace than usual, anxious to get to the photoshoot for the cover of their playbill for the show. He wasn’t close to Kourtney or anyone else on the costumes committee, so he hadn’t able to worm anything out of them about the outfits. Whatever Seb was wearing was going to be a total surprise (for both of them) and he couldn’t be more surprised.

However, when Carlos got to the auditorium, he didn’t see Seb or Miss Jenn. In fact, the only person he actually saw was Big Red, who was holding a camera.

“Where is everyone?” Carlos asked him.

“Kourtney is with the rest of costumes and makeup helping everyone get changed, and, uh,” he glances around. “I don’t actually know where Miss Jenn is.”

Huh. “Oh, okay. I’ll go find her, I guess,” he said, turning on his heel back out of the auditorium and down the hall towards Miss Jenn’s office. Maybe she had forgotten?

As he approached the room, he heard voices coming from inside. One was definitely Miss Jenn’s, and the other was… the principal? He tried not to think anything of it before sticking his head through the doorframe.

“Good morning, Miss Jenn!” he said cheerfully, “You coming to the photoshoot?”

She looked surprised to see him, although honestly not more stressed than normal. (That woman seriously needed a spa day or something, she seemed stressed out 90% of the time.)

“You go ahead and get started without me, Carlos,” she told him with a smile.

That got rid of some of Carlos’s nerves, but only replaced them with different ones about being in charge. It never really seemed to go well for him whenever Miss Jenn left him alone with the group. This was just a photoshoot though, not like him trying to run the entire rehearsal without her.

“Okay!” he said, then headed back to the auditorium. Hopefully, he hasn’t missed anyone’s costume reveal yet.

Thankfully, the only person who seemed to be in costume already was Rico (who’s Ryan costume looked suspiciously like a Newsie, but who is he to judge.) Natalie and Kourtney have also made their way onto center stage, which means the rest of the actors are probably coming out at any second.

Carlos gathers the two of them plus Big Red to discuss the plan for the photoshoot Natalie brings out her clipboard, reminding each of them of their roles. It’s honestly a dream to see another student in charge besides just him.

“Okay, that sounds like a plan!” he tells them once Natalie finishes explaining because he still has to take some initiative.

Carlos then watches as the actors begin to file in. He has to applaud them, the costumes are pretty spot on from the movie. Although, Ricky’s wig could use a little bit of work, no matter how hilarious it is to see him look more like Shaggy from Scooby Doo than Troy.

When Seb steps out from the opposite side of the stage, though, all of his attention is on the blonde boy as Carlos has to keep his mouth from dropping open.

He’s wearing a simple pink t-shirt and some acid washed jeans (cuffed, of course) as well as a few bracelets, which are paired holographic sneakers- platform heeled sneakers. They make him a good few inches taller than Carlos (not that he minds, of course.) And not to mention the glittery vest he has over the pink shirt, matching Sharpay’s audition outfit from the movie.

And then the makeup- Carlos doesn’t even know how to begin to describe the eyeshadow, but whatever Kourtney has done is genius. It’s a mix of pinks, oranges, and yellows that covers most of his left eye and stretches out into his hair, which is also matched with a pink stripe. His hair has also been combed upwards in a higher fringe than usual, sprayed in place with glitter hair spray (how he’s going to get that out, Carlos has no idea.) And he’s pretty sure he’s wearing a light shade of pink lipstick.

After a moment, though Carlos realizes that Seb’s eyes are wide, and he isn’t necessarily giving a positive reaction. Even though he wants to run into Seb’s arms right now, he keeps his calm as the boy approaches.

“Hey,” he offers softly. “You okay with this?”

“I don’t know how to say it.”

“Just say it,” Carlos says after a moment, still searching Seb’s face for some sign of a good (or bad) emotion.

Seb is quiet, like he’s trying to find the right words, before his face breaks out in a smile. He leans towards Carlos, softly saying “I’m home.”

Carlos feels that tug in his chest again as he matches Seb’s movement, leaning forward and placing his hands on Seb’s shoulder as the two giggle a bit. He’s so close to the other boy, and they’re both jittery with excitement for the show and to see each other again.

He wants nothing more right now than to drag Seb away with him to behind the curtains and away from the photoshoot. But they do actually have to get this done, and Carlos does have to take charge. He allows Seb to go find as his place and retreats next to Big Red, as everyone begins to get in line.

“Okay guys, we’re gonna get one in for practice, okay?” Big Red calls once everyone is settled and ready to go.

They line up like the original album as he calls “we’re all gonna jump on the count of three, ready?”

Carlos is preparing himself for this to be an easy, one-shot take. Unfortunately, because it's this cast, he quickly realizes it’s not going to be that simple as Big Red counts up to the first photo. Half of them jump on 2, some jump on 3, and he’s pretty sure Nini and EJ don’t even jump until after Big Red finishes counting. Not to mention Kourtney was still adjusting EJ’s costume, resulting in her running in front of the camera.

“One, two, three!” Red tries again, although it still seems to end with the same result, as well as the “L” in “musical” on the sign behind them falling off.

How the heck did they do this in the movies?

“Wait, what happened?” Big Red asks.

Ricky sighs. “Where to begin?”

“I think you went early,” Seb tells him.

Gina looks between them before turning to Red and asking “are we jumping on three or after three?”

“Yeah, the count of three. Ready?” Red tells her.

Ricky shakes his head. “Nah, man, you need some new words.”

Meanwhile, Seb is leaning down to massage his ankle. “I think I broke a heel!” he tells them. (In hindsight, it probably wasn’t their best idea to have him jump while wearing platform shoes.)

“You guys, this isn’t that hard,” Carlos sighs. He can already feel a headache coming on. “You smile, you leave the earth, you land!”

“It’s a little hard to smile when we don’t even know the plan,” Ricky tells him, and okay, that stung a little bit. He desperately wants Miss Jenn to magically show up to fix all this.

“I can’t look at Ricky, is that a problem?” Nini asks, and obviously, it’s a joke, but Carlos’s head is pounding. He just wants everything to work for once. His excited mood from the morning has already disappeared.

He sighs while the others laugh at what Nini says. “Okay, let's take a five,” he says, although more for himself than anyone else.

“On five or after five?” Ricky asks, walking off. Even though it’s a joke, his tone is a lot less playful than Nini’s.

“I think he’s mad at us,” Seb says softly, less confident than before as he glances over at Carlos. He honestly can’t tell if Seb is joking too or if he’s genuinely concerned about Ricky being mad. (Knowing Seb, it could really go either way.)

Everyone had already begun to disperse after Ricky walked off, but Seb takes a moment before he makes his way over to Carlos after the break is called.

“Hey,” he says as he approaches, the same soft tone that he had used with the comment about Ricky. “Are you okay?”

Carlos lets out a long sigh, closing his eyes and tilting his head back. “Honestly it feels like the entire world has been put on my shoulders,” he says, letting them drop. “Or, at least, the East High theatre world.”

Seb grabs his hands (thank god Ashlyn isn’t here.) “It’s just a photoshoot,” he says.

Coming from anyone else it would have made Carlos feel stupid and belittled, but because it’s Seb… well, like he’s said before. Seb never makes him feel anything like that.

“I know, I just,” he trails off. He doesn’t even know why he feels this way. It’s like something inside his body refuses to let him relax over this. “Nobody listens to me, and I don’t know where Miss Jenn is, and I don’t know what to do anymore.”

“They were just making jokes, though. It wasn’t anything against you,” Seb furrows his eyebrows.

He sighs again. “I know, it’s more than that though. Like, in rehearsals too. Nobody has any respect for me, which, whatever, but it’s hard to get stuff done, y’know?” He doesn’t know how to explain it well, and he’s really hoping his venting doesn’t upset Seb.

Thankfully, Seb doesn’t seem too affected by it. Instead, he just squeezes Carlos’s hands softly. “They still respect you, Los. We still respect you.”

Carlos just responds with a soft “okay” because, honestly, he doesn’t totally believe Seb. Everyone treats him like he’s the nicest, most wonderful person in the world. Truly, he is, so Carlos shouldn’t compare. But it’s hard when at the same time they all act like Carlos is just there as Miss Jenn’s more annoying and underqualified assistant.

It definitely wasn’t the Monday morning he was hoping for it to be an hour ago.

“Hey, Seb, can you come help?” Red calls a second later, as he attempts to set up a ladder to fix the “L.”

“I’m gonna-”

“Yeah, go,” Carlos tells him. “I’ll go round up everyone; we should probably get back to the photoshoot.”

He doesn’t really want to leave Seb’s side, (and he should really be the one helping with the ladder, because, come on, three points of contact Seb! If Red wanted him though, he would have asked for him, not Seb.) Unfortunately, though, he Gina and EJ in a pretty heated conversation off to the side, and he’s not sure if it’s going to end anytime soon.

“Guys?” he says cautiously as he approaches.

They both ignore him, of course.

EJ continues the conversation instead. “So, do you care about Ricky?”

“And what if I do?”

“Um, guys?” Carlos says again. He really didn’t need (or want) to hear this conversation. He just needs to get them back to finish the photoshoot, and then they can hash out whatever this is.

“Not now!” they tell him at the same time. Immediately, he ducks his head and walks out. On a normal day, it wouldn’t even get a reaction from him, but it’s just the irony of the situation. Whatever Seb thought he saw in the other students was wrong, and unsurprisingly so.

By the time he gets out into the hallway, his throat is tight and his entire face is on fire. Carlos has to force himself to take a few calming breaths, reminding himself that it’s not personal and he’s just having a bad morning.

Once he’s calm again, he pulls out his phone and dials Miss Jenn’s number. She picks up on the very last ring.

“Miss Jenn, I don’t think I can stall much longer,” he says as he makes his way down the hallway, trying to keep his voice level. “Are you coming?”

“Carlos, I was just about to call you!” she responds. It sounds promising, but the tightness in her voice tells him otherwise.

“Is everything okay?”

“Everything’s fine, except that I may be out of a job in 24 hours.”

Okay, great, time to panic. “Miss Jenn, I can’t see your face, so I don’t know if you’re kidding- oh my god!” Carlos says as she approaches with a box under her arm. He can easily recognize the contents of her office in it after weeks of meetings together and eating lunch in the room.

Okay, time to really panic.

“Keep your voice down, honey,” she whispers as she slides her phone into the box.

“What happened?” he asks, definitely not keeping his voice down.

“Carlos, I may have exaggerated one or two credits on my resume,” Miss Jenn explains. “Principal Gutierrez is a little too literal for my taste, but here we are.”

“Where’s ‘here’?”

She ignores him, (what else is new,) and instead continues. “The important thing is you keep this train on the tracks. Hopefully, everything will be cleared up when I sit before the school board tomorrow, okay?”

“Wait, what?” No, not okay.

“Keep rehearsal on after school today and don’t speak a word of this to anyone,” her voice lowers even more, as she glances around in case of any roaming theatre kids. “In the theater, morale is everything.”

Before Carlos can say anything else, there are footsteps behind them as Principal Gutierrez approaches.

“Miss Jenn, if you would,” he says, gesturing down the hallway. She ducks her head, turning to exit the school.

“Miss Jenn, wait!” he calls after her. How was he supposed to take charge of an entire rehearsal if he couldn’t even correctly take charge of a photoshoot?

She turns back around for a moment to face Carlos. “Trust the process,” she tells him with a reassuring smile, although he doesn’t feel reassured at all.

With that, she turns on her heel again, leaving Carlos lost and confused in the middle of the hallway.

As if on cue from sensing his negative mood, his phone dings in his back project with a text notification from Seb.

From: Seb Matthew-Smith: are you okay :( ?? we just finished the photoshoot... big red and natalie took over after you ran out.

Carlos pockets his phone without answering.

—

He feels bad for ignoring Seb all day, he really does.

He wasn’t totally giving him the silent treatment of course. And he appreciates that Seb feels like he has to care enough to ask Carlos if he’s okay during lunch, and again during chem, but it’s hard to lie to him.

He wants more than anything to vent to Seb because he knows the blonde is too polite to tell him to stop. Miss Jenn had specifically told him not to tell anyone, which meant that he either had to lie or stop answering Seb’s questions.

Carlos was able to redirect the conversation during lunch, changing the topic from how he was feeling to discussing the school’s vegetarian options (or lack thereof) with Seb. Then during chem, he just acted like he really needed to learn how to convert grams to moles which involved ignoring Seb. Saying nothing was easier than both lying and telling the truth since technically he wasn’t doing either.

Seb seemed to back off a little after that, thankfully, although Carlos was hoping he wasn’t getting the wrong idea. Geez, why did this have to be so complicated?

Eventually, after an entire day of hoping that the last bell would never ring or some freak storm would hit SLC so they wouldn't be able to put on rehearsal, Carlos is forced to make the dreaded walk down the hallway to the bomb shelter. He can feel his phone in his backpack vibrating with one last text notification from Seb, probably asking where Carlos is, but he ignores it once more.

He stops at Miss Jenn’s office, hoping that by some miracle she had returned. Instead, he was just met with an empty room with only the desk and chairs remaining, ridden of everything inside that gave it it’s personality.

Carlos ends up getting to the bomb shelter about 5 minutes after they’re meant to start. Everyone is already antsy as they await instruction, which is not the best energy for him to start with. He pretends not to see Seb by the piano with Nini as he walks in. They’re probably talking about him.

Even with every bone in his body telling him to turn around and walk out of the school, he pushes forward and begins rehearsal.

“Okay, people!” he announces, faking a laugh as he tries (and fails) to capture Miss Jenn’s energy. “Let’s stage a number! I’m late!”

“Is Miss Jenn coming?” Nini asks.

So much for pretending not to see them. “Miss Jenn had a small personal matter to attend to and won’t be here today,” Carlos tries to explain as vaguely as possible.

“Oh. Is everything alright?”

“Good question,” Seb adds.

“Everything is fine,” Carlos forces a smile. “Why would you guys even ask that?”

He turns to grab his binder. More than anything, he wants to scream with his entire body that no, nothing is alright, but for Miss Jenn’s sake, he just keeps going. That’s showbiz, baby.

Of course, today is the day that he’s supposed to stage the boldest concept of the show. He came up with it when he was watching the movie, and it kind of mirrors it in a way he thinks is clever. Part of him knows that the idea sells itself when people realize that, but another part of him is already preparing for backlash.

“Okay, Gabriella, I need you downstage on this mark,” Carlos says, grabbing Nini’s hands and pulling her in front of the boxes he had Red set up. He could feel her hesitancy, but he ignored it as he continued. “Troy, stage right, Chad, stage left box. Other boys find a box” he instructed.

It was admittedly kind of fun to direct them around and see his concept come to life. Plus, nobody had said anything yet. Maybe this would work out.

That feeling lasted for about a few seconds, though, as Nini’s voice cut in right when he was ready to start.

“Uh, are they going to be on stage with me while I’m singing?”

“Yes,” Carlos says, turning to face her. “They will be frozen in various poses to come as the ballad builds. Nini, you will be wandering through a forest of boys,” he explains. It actually gives him a little more confidence in the concept in doing so, reassuring him that maybe his idea wasn’t as overly bold as he originally thought.

“Wait, what? What does that mean?” she asks.

Or, maybe not.

“Do you know what a forest of trees looks like?” he asks.

“I do,” Nini says, raising her eyebrows, and Carlos curses at himself internally. He was trying to make it sound dumb so she would stop asking questions, but now he feels dumb.

“Okay, but with boys,” he says, trying to shake the feeling.

Nini laughs, but there's no humor behind it. “I’m sorry, why?”

“Because your heart has just been shattered, and you can’t stop thinking about how amazing Troy is,” he explains, refusing to let his voice shake. His heart is already beating quicker then normal, and if anyone else questions him, Carlos might break.

He turns and points at Seb (whose expression has remained blank.) “Let’s go.”

Seb spins on the piano bench and starts playing the beginning of the ballad, and Carlos lets out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. The sooner they start this rehearsal from hell, the sooner they can end it.

Until Nini’s voice cuts through again.

“Ah, I’m sorry, but at this point in the show Troy just sold me out to his teammates,” she says.

Carlos wants to reply with “yes, I watched the movie too, and probably more than you have. The song is about him and how she can’t stop thinking about him even when she’s angry.” Before he can get a word out, though, Ashlyn adds on.

“She’s got a point. What Troy did was kind of unforgivable,” she agrees. “Respectfully, Carlos, I think the last thing anyone wants in this moment is four more versions of him.”

(It hurts to hear that coming from Ashlyn of all people, who was one of the only people he really considered a friend. Is it still respectful if she’s totally dissing his idea? Where is Gina’s input when he needs it?)

“Maybe she can chop down the trees,” Natalie says.

“Or, what if she’s surrounded by a forest of loving and supportive sisters?” Kourtney suggests, which immediately gets more positive feedback than any of Carlos’s choreography ideas. Hearing everyone critique one of the only parts of the show Miss Jenn allowed him to block by himself feels like a stake through his heart.

His chest is tight, his breathing is getting more rapid, and he’s rubbing his hands together to stop them from sweating and trembling too much. If Miss Jenn was here, this wouldn’t happen, right? Or is he not qualified enough to be a choreographer, much less a director.

Carlos doesn’t know which option hurts more.

“Is it better if she just does a solo acoustic version?” Ricky calls out.

No, no, no!

He’s definitely getting more upset now, which leads to him getting more panicked.

He hears Gina say “I vote for that!” which is his last bit of hope for some defense going down the drain — Seb is still sitting at the piano, looking confused and overwhelmed at everything, clearly not making any move to defend Carlos either.

All the anger, and sadness, and unworthiness, and every other negative emotion are welling up inside him, and Carlos can’t hold it in anymore.

So, he snaps.

“Okay, you guys! This is not a democracy!” he yells, and immediately the room goes quiet. He feels his face heat up as people exchange looks of surprise mixed with offense, which doesn’t feel fair. It’s not like the entire cast was ganging up on them.

“Carlos, are you okay?” Nini asks.

(Always the first to speak. Always the first to defend herself, and push away Carlos in doing so. Why don’t people listen to him like they do to her? Because she’s older? Because she’s the lead? Because everyone loves her? Because she’s not the 15 year old Mexican gay kid who will always be an outsider and is just trying his best?)

(Maybe Mr. Mazzara had a point...)

“‘Cuz it’s not that deep. We can just come back when Miss Jenn gets here,” she continues, and Carlos wants to roll his eyes and cry at the same time. If it’s not that deep, why don’t they just go along with it? And what part about “small, personal matter to attend to and won’t be here today” do they not get?

It’s all too much, and Carlos is at his breaking point.

“Well, she’s not here, and I don’t know if she’s ever coming back,” Carlos says before he can stop himself.

Once again, everyone goes quiet as the energy in the room shifts.

“Wait, what?” Ricky asks.

“Is this a joke?” Ashlyn adds on. (Carlos could only wish.)

He has the attention of the room now, though, and he knows there's no way he’s getting out of this without telling them the whole story.

“She’s in deep trouble, you guys,” he says, closing his eyes, although not before seeing people stand up and crossing their arms, expressions demanding an explanation.

“They’re saying that she lied on her job application, and there’s a school board meeting in less than 24 hours, and she’s probably going to lose her job,” he explains, opening his eyes but avoiding contact.

“I was supposed to tell any of you, but,” he pauses, struggling how to put this nicely without totally breaking down. “I am trying to do my best here,” his voice comes out hard and unforgiving. He already broke his promise with Miss Jenn, what else do they want from him?

Nini’s the first to speak, again. “I can’t believe it,” she says quietly, going to sit next to a surprised Seb.

“What are we even doing in rehearsal?” EJ asks.

“Wait, how can we have a show if we don’t have a teacher?” Ashlyn cuts in.

Seb leans forward off the piano bench, speaking for the first time since the beginning of this mess. “You know you could have told me,” he says. He’s searching Carlos’s face with worry written across his own.

That clears the red in front of Carlos’s eyes for a moment. Even when he’s upset, at least he has Seb to ground him.

“Miss Jenn asked me not to,” he tells Seb softly, hinting at an apology in his voice.

“Wow, Carlos, what else are you not telling us?” Ej asks, reminding Carlos that he can’t win. He tries to help and do what he’s told, and they get upset. He explains what’s going on, and they blame him for it.

He wants Miss Jenn back, too, (arguably more than anyone else,) but how is he supposed to fix that on his own?

“Hey, let’s all breathe for a second,” Ashlyn says, only for Natalie to cut her off.

“Do you want to be in charge?” she asks.

“She didn’t say that,” Kourtney defends.

All the arguing makes Carlos want to yell again, but whenever he goes to open his mouth, the words get caught in his throat, and someone else talks over him.

“You know what?” Nini asks, standing up and grabbing her backpack. “I, um, I need a minute,” she says, slinging the bag over her shoulder and walking out of the bomb shelter.

“Right there with you,” Kourtney follows, twirling her finger as if to round up everyone in the room.

“Honestly, same,” Ashlyn says, and Carlos can feel her unenthusiasm and discontent digging into his skin.

He can hear Gina saying “wait” over and over again as Natalie calls “guys, wait!” There’s no use, though, and after a moment they pick up their bags as well. Even Seb rushes to pack up his music folder.

And Carlos can’t do anything but stand there and watch as his world crumbles.

“I’m sorry, Carlos,” Natalie tells him as she walks out.

“Rehearsals are officially canceled until further notice,” he finally calls out after them, before throwing his hands up and exiting out the back entrance of the room.

He gets all the way to the parking lot until he realizes he left his backpack in the bomb shelter.

Carlos walks back in, but when he gets to the room, he finds Gina and Ricky still inside.

He wants nothing more than to just get his backpack and start walking home, (Seb usually drives him on Mondays since his mom works late, which was another thing Carlos had been looking forward to today, but it seems he already left,) but he really doesn’t want to interact with them right now. Instead, he hangs around outside the room, leaning against a wall as he waits for them to finish.

Just when he’s contemplating sucking it up and walking into the room (we get it, Ricky, you can sing and play guitar and everybody is in love with you,) he sees a familiar face headed his way, and decides to strike up a conversation.

“Benjamin Mazzara,” he calls out, stopping the STEM teacher in his tracks. He must have been stepping out to get something for the robotics team because he’s clutching a robot in his hand and seems eager to not be interrupted.

Too late.

Mr. Mazzara looks surprised to see Carlos actually addressing him to his face after always ducking his head every time the teacher passes. “Carlos…. Surname.”

(Carlos has been in his class for two years, and he’s pretty sure he’s the only Rodriguez in their entire school. How hard is it for him to remember?)

“I assume you know what’s happening to Miss Jenn?” he confronts.

Mr. Mazzara starts walking away as he talks, and Carlos follows. “I may have heard a rumor in the faculty lounge.”

“And I assume you’re happy?”

“Not on the outside.” Carlos has to try to not roll his eyes when the teacher says that. Alright, angst king.

“Look, everyone has fudged on a resume before,” he says. That’s practically what a resume is.

“I haven’t,” Mr. Mazzara points out, and this time Carlos can’t help it when his eyes roll.

“The real question is, who narked on Miss Jenn.”

“Wait,” Mr. Mazzara stops at the end of the hallway, turning to face Carlos, his eyebrows raised. “Are you suggesting I had something to do with this?”

“Are you admitting that you did?” Carlos presses.

“Of course not.” Yeah, right. As if he hasn’t had it out for both of them since day one.

“Look, kid,” he continues. “Has it occurred to you that Miss Jenn is responsible for her own untimely demise?”

With that, he turns on his heel and continues down the hall, leaving Carlos planted in place, dumbfounded for the second time today. Seriously, does that guy ever speak like a normal person?

He wants to follow Mr. Mazzara and bug him more, but he can hear Ashlyn and EJ’s voices coming from that hallway. Instead, he retreats back to the bomb shelter.

Thankfully, Gina and Ricky are gone by the time Carlos reaches it, judging by the absence of Ricky’s guitar that was previously reverberating throughout the surrounding halls.

Carlos walks through the door, ready to grab his backpack before starting his walk home, and is instead greeted with Seb staring sadly at the piano.

“I thought you went home already,” Carlos says as he enters, and Seb’s head snaps up in surprise.

“I thought you did too,” he says hesitantly, although he seems relieved to see Carlos.

Carlos points at his forgotten bag. “I left my backpack in here.”

“Same with my jacket,” Seb says, holding up the article of clothing in question. “And, uh, I was hoping you would come back, which you did.” He glances nervously at Carlos. “I was supposed to drive you home.”

“Right,” Carlos nods. It’s quiet for a few moments, and Carlos really wants to just bolt. He’s blown off Seb too many times today already, though.

Thankfully, Seb breaks the silence. “I am so, so sorry about not defending you in rehearsal,” he bursts out. “It all happened so quick, and I couldn’t keep up or find a good place to cut in, and I could see you getting more stressed. You’re probably angry and don’t want these excuses, but-”

“Seb,” Carlos cuts him off. “You’re okay.”

Yeah, rehearsal sucked, and there’s a weight in his stomach with everyone’s comments and with about what’s going to go down now that everyone left, but he knows he’s probably better off with Seb supporting him through it rather than holding an unnecessary grudge.

“So, rehearsal today...” Seb trails, as if he’s reading Carlos’s brain. “Kinda intense.”

“Yeah, well, it’s not every day the entire cast of your dream show gangs up on you,” he says, voice dripping with sarcasm.

“They didn’t mean-”

“Yeah, I’m sure they didn’t mean it like that, but it still hurts,” Carlos cuts him off. “Still think they respect me?”

Seb is quiet, clearly taken aback, and Carlos realizes he’s never shown Seb this side of him. The part of him that’s dark and scary and upset all the time. The part of him that keeps him up at night, wondering what went wrong in the day and how he could fix it. The part of him that he pushes away so he doesn’t push people away just like he’s doing right now.

The part of him that never feels good enough.

It’s out, he can see it, and he knows Seb can too. It’s terrifying to be this vulnerable. Seb hasn’t left yet, though, which means it can’t be too terrifying.

“I’m sorry. I’m not mad at you, I promise. Usually, people leave after I start venting so I guess once I started and you were still here I couldn’t stop,” Carlos explains as he goes to sit at the piano bench. Thankfully, Seb’s features soften, and he crosses to the other side of the piano and stands next to him.

“I’m just… mad at everything,” he continues, slumping over. “And I’m tired of Miss Jenn just leaving at the drop of a hat and expecting me to be able to just take over when nobody listens to me.”

Seb doesn’t stay anything, but he inches closer to him until his torso is pressing into Carlos. He feels an arm wrap around his shoulders. It doesn’t make sense for a moment because Seb is just casually touchy with everyone, but then...

Oh.

Carlos sinks down even more, but this time it’s into the hug. It’s not even a full hug, more like Seb pressing his body against Carlos while he just sits there, but it’s the most physically intimate thing he’s received in a long time.

Somehow, the comfort does more than any words could in the moment. It doesn’t immediately wash away all his worries like his presence at homecoming, but it’s enough for now, and more than enough for Carlos.

Seb drops his arm after a moment, but he doesn’t leave Carlos’s side. He looks up at the blonde boy, who looks like he wants to say something.

But before he can speak, Carlos’s phone vibrates in his pocket. He pulls it out, and when he sees Miss Jenn’s contact as the notification, he quickly retreats from Seb’s side to read it.

“Is everything okay?” Seb asks as Carlos scrolls through the notification.

“I think so?” he says, switching off his phone and going to grab his phone. “Miss Jenn wants me to meet her at the cafe down the street. She says she has something for me… how am I supposed to interpret that?”

“Maybe it’s good news?”

“I can only hope,” Carlos laughs shortly.

“Do you want a ride? Georgie is on her way-”

Carlos wants to accept— any excuse to hang out with Seb — but it’s really not that far of a walk, and he wants to get there as soon as possible. “It’s alright, I can walk. Thank you though,” he says smiling at Seb, who seems to take it as an acceptable answer and returns the smile softly.

He's about to exit when a “Carlos!” is called. He turns to face the boy again, who’s holding Carlos’s jacket in his hand.

“You, uh- you forgot your jacket,” he says holding up the discarded item of clothing.

He smiles again, walking back over. When he goes to take the jacket, though, Seb pulls him into another hug.

“Good luck!” he says, squeezing Carlos tight before letting him go and holding out the jacket for real this time

“Thank you,” Carlos says, and he doesn’t know if he’s thanking Seb for the jacket or the hug, but either works.

It takes a lot to turn and walk out the doors of the school and towards the cafe rather than run back into Seb’s arms, but he manages to make it to the store. He doesn’t even realize he’s blowing Seb off again until he arrives, but the guilt hits him fast when he realizes he never apologized. Before he steps inside, he pulls out his phone and shoots the boy a quick text.

From: Carlos Rodriguez: so sorry about ignoring your texts today. i appreciated them, just wasnt in the headspace to answer today with everything

From: Carlos Rodriguez: i owe you a coffee or something to make it up to you :)

He doesn’t think about how flirty it sounds or the fact that he practically asked Seb on a date until it’s sent, but it’s too late now. (Besides, they’re past that point, right?) He wishes he could do more, honestly, but he has to talk to Miss Jenn before he can face Seb again.

When Carlos walks inside, he sees her sitting at a table. All mushy feelings are immediately forgotten as he runs over to greet the drama teacher.

“Miss Jenn! I was so happy to hear from you!” he says. She smiles and stands up to hug him (what is up with everybody and the hugs today?) which is hopefully a good sign.

“You said you’ve got something for me. Tell me it’s good news,” he begs, and immediately her energy switches.

“It’s complicated,” she says, putting her hands on his shoulders and directing him to the chair. “Please sit.” As he does, he notices the newspaper spread out where she’s circled what looks like job openings. Okay, not a good sign after all.

“Carlos,” she starts, and he can already feel his heart sinking. “If tomorrow’s board meeting goes the way I think it will, you guys are going to hear a lot of… not great things about me.”

“No, we don’t-” he starts to defend, but she cuts him off.

“It’s all true.”

Carlos furrows his eyebrows. “What is?”

“I never told you guys my real last name because I was embarrassed at how little I’ve actually accomplished,” she says, voice breaking.

Carlos just sits there in silence, still confused and still with a tight chest. It feels the same way he felt when he realized Santa wasn’t real, like the world has suddenly decided he’s old enough to know it’s ugly truth. (And maybe he is old enough, but he’s never going to feel ready.)

“I’m a fake teacher, Carlos,” she admits, voice breaking. “Most of the learning that’s been happening in that rehearsal room… has been all of you teaching me.”

He scoffs in disbelief. “No, that’s not true,” he tells her. She’s already taught him more than any real teacher ever has, how can she be fake?

“It’s the only part of this that ever was,” she tells him, and that seals the deal. Carlos feels like his entire world is falling down around him for the second time that day.

He opens his mouth to say something, but no words come out. All he can do is shake his head in disbelief. This cannot actually be happening, right? If his high expectations for the day haven’t already been thrown out the window, they’ve been run over in the middle of a highway at this point

Instead, Miss Jenn reaches down next to her and pulls out what looks like a bright red safe at first. At closer inspection, it’s more of a heavy-duty carry-on file box.

“Here,” she says, pushing it towards Carlos. “It’s my director's file. Audition notes, staging ideas, everything. It’s all there.”

“But I can’t direct the show,” he tells her quickly. He would love to try it, sure, and he kind of loves that Miss Jenn thinks he can.

But running rehearsal for a day is one thing, and judging by the cast’s reaction, there’s no way they would last more than 5 minutes with Carlos being in charge of more than just one set of blocking.

“Oh, it’s not for you, honey,” she shakes her head, which makes sense he guesses. “It’s for your next drama teacher.”

She stands up to leave, as Carlos struggles to form words. She pauses to linger by him for a moment longer.

“I just hope she loves you guys half as much as I do,” she says finally, placing her hand on Carlos’s shoulder.

Then she’s gone, leaving Carlos to sit there with the director’s file and wondering how it could have possibly gotten this bad. The person he looked up to most in the world, one of two people who saved him this year, is not even close to everything he thought she was. So what is he supposed to do now? Just accept reality and move on?

Carlos isn’t very good at moving on...

He realizes something, though, after his mom picks him up and they’re driving home. Even if Miss Jenn is a fake teacher, it doesn’t mean she didn’t teach Carlos things. And now he has to save her in return.

He just doesn’t know how yet.

—

Carlos is still struggling that night on how to help Miss Jenn when Seb texts him. They had been texting back and forth ever since he got back home and was able to check Seb’s response to his apology. (It was sweet, almost flustered, and it left Carlos feeling a little bit warmer after everything. When his mom asked, he blamed his flushed cheeks on the November chill.)

From: Seb Matthew-Smith: ashlyn invited us to red’s house to talk about some stuff. do you want a ride over?

He wants to ask why didn’t Ashlyn just text him? but he presumes it must have been sent to a cast-only group chat (still sucks, but understandable.) He checks just in case, though.

From: Carlos Rodriguez: did the invite extend to me or are you inviting me?

From: Seb Matthew-Smith: obviously youre supposed to come. youre just as important as everyone else in the show, if not more. we couldnt do it without you :)

From: Seb Matthew-Smith: and no, im not just saying that because i like you

Well, Carlos doesn’t know how to function after that last text anyway (or how to interpret it), so he accepts the ride invitation. About half an hour later, a familiar car pulls up in front of his house.

He says goodbye to his mom and promises to text her before going outside and climbing into the car just like it’s a normal post-rehearsal trip. Except instead of going to his house, he’s leaving.

Georgie is sat in the driver's seat as always (he wonders what Seb must be bribing her with to get her to drive him everywhere,) and Seb is in the passenger seat. At least their matching smiles are able to calm the knot in his stomach a bit.

The drive over to Red’s house is a different energy than their usual drives home, with the radio playing quietly and Georgie’s casual chatter about nothing to break the silence. Maybe because it’s dark out, or maybe because Carlos can feel the nervous energy from both Seb and himself, but either way, they arrive after a few minutes.

As Seb is letting Carlos out of the car, he can see Ashlyn and EJ over Seb’s shoulder, already following Kaden, Rico, and Steph into the house. Kourtney and Nini are walking up to the door as well, and more cars are pulling up, and wow, Carlos hopes Big Red knows they’re all coming.

Carlos follows Seb down the steps as they make their way into Big Red’s basement. He inevitably finds himself perched on the edge of the couch next to Seb, who has his knees drawn up to his chin as everyone finds their place in the room.

Everyone is completely silent as they all glance at each other— except for EJ, who’s staring at his phone — and Carlos avoids eye contact by keeping his eyes locked on the boy next to him (not that he minds.) The energy is definitely tenser now that they’re all together again, but at least he has Seb by his side this time.

“This is a terrible party. They aren't even pretzels,” Natalie breaks the silence from where she’s standing next to EJ.

(She’s got a point, although Carlos wouldn’t exactly call this a ‘party’.)

(Not that he would know, he’s never been to one.)

“What are we all doing here?” she continues.

Ashlyn sighs. “We all ended up in the same basement after a really bad day, so someone should say something.”

Carlos almost laughs. Yeah, bad day. You could say that again. Instead, though, he speaks, somehow finding his words for what feels like the first time all day.

“Fine. I’ll say something,” he bursts out, and he can see Seb and a few others looking at him in surprise, but he presses on. “I’m mad at Miss Jenn.”

“Why?” Gina scoffs. “Because she’s got a couple skeletons in her closet?”

God, no. Carlos is the last person to judge that.

“No,” he explains. “Because she’s giving up. She was the first teacher to not see me as a punchline, and now she’s not even a real teacher?”

“Define ‘real teacher’?” Ashlyn cuts in.

“He’s got a point,” Kourtney says.

Natalie shakes her head. “Does he, though?”

“Guys,” Red says, and Carlos is thankful that he’s at least trying to not have this afternoon happen all over again. He’s had enough disagreement and disappointment in just one day to last a lifetime.

Natalie presses on, though. “So, why are we all here then?” Next to him, Carlos feels Seb tense up

“Yeah, good question,” EJ adds, rolling his eyes. “This is a waste of time.”

And maybe this is, and maybe it’s the end and they have no idea yet, but Carlos is going to do everything he can to have that not happen. They’ve put in so much work, and they still have too much work to do before this can be the end.

“Honestly? Because she gave me a shot,” Carlos admits, and he can feel the words coming from somewhere deep in his body. “And it’s been a long time since someone gave me a shot.”

“Yeah,” Seb says quietly, voice breaking the tiniest bit as he slides his hand up to Carlos’s knee. Even in this depressing environment, he feels electric currents running through his body from where Seb’s skin meets his, and the soft “yeah” goes straight to his heart, making it beat quicker than normal.

Even in drama-teacher’s-career threatening situations, he’s a wreck.

“She gave me a voice,” Nini adds, and a few people nod along.

Kourtney crosses her arms. “Yeah, and now nobody’s gonna get to hear it because Miss Jenn screwed up.”

“Okay, does anyone actually care if her past is… a little bit sketchy?” Ashlyn asks. “Anyone?”

Ricky sighs. “I do.”

“Seriously, dude?” Big Red asks. (Carlos wonders if there’s something Red knows that no one else does about Ricky, but now isn’t the time to ask, so he keeps his mouth shut.)

“What, because you live some perfect life?” Kourtney adds.

“Not at all,” he defends, standing up. “Because she put our show in jeopardy. And now we’re all here, maybe for the last time together. And for some of us, this has become… I don’t know…” he trails off, struggling to find the words.

“Family,” Nini finishes for them.

Carlos can hear both their voices breaking, and he swallows thickly. Ricky was the last person he expected to feel so connected to the show and the cast, and if he can… well, Carlos has been working for this forever. Whether or not the cast accepts him as part of the group, for this to work out, he needs to accept them as part of his group.

“What team?” Ricky asks.

And Carlos seals his fate as he softly replies “Wildcats,” along with everyone else.

“Okay wildcats,” Ashlyn says. “So what are we doing about it?”

—

Later that night, (or technically, early morning,) Nini ends up offering both Seb and Carlos a ride home along with her and Kourtney, and they both accept. He had texted his mom a while ago when they first realized they were going to be there longer than expected, and he didn’t want to wake her up now.

Going in Nini’s car did make him a bit nervous still after the events of rehearsal. Everyone had seemed to move past it already, but Carlos was still caught up on it for some reason.

He pushed it aside, though, as he got into Nini’s car. She had actually been the one to suggest Carlos choreograph the dance with the help of Gina and Big Red, and the entire forest of boys incident seemed to drop from her mind, so he went along with it.

Now Seb and Carlos were in the backseat of Nini’s mom’s minivan, sitting closer than probably necessary with Seb’s head on his shoulder as they tiredly discuss the events of the night. Seb had been assisting Nini and Ashlyn in writing the song, so the two had been separated for most of the night until now.

“Y’know,” Seb says between a yawn as he reaches out to play with Carlos’s fingers. “You don’t have to tell me all of Miss Jenn's secrets, but you don’t keep it a secret from me if you need to confide in someone,” he says softly, so only Carlos can hear over the rumble of the car.

“Okay,” he agrees, because he’s too tired to think and he still doesn’t know how to interpret Seb’s text from earlier, but he’s willing to take whatever this is for the next few moments that he’s got it.

Reaching Carlos’s house feels the same way he did during the last few minutes of homecoming, like he just wants this feeling and this moment of safety to last forever. He does need to get at least a few hours of sleep before tomorrow, though, and in order to do that, he, unfortunately, has to leave Seb’s side.

Seb lifts his head when he feels them stop in Carlos’s driveway. In one swift movement, he brings the hand that he had been playing with to his lips, kissing Carlos’s knuckles softly. It sends shockwaves through his body, and if the car door was open, he probably would have fallen out.

“Goodnight, Los,” he says, and yawns again, and Carlos smiles.

“Goodnight, Seb. See you tomorrow,” he tells him, climbing out of the car, and walking straight into his house and into bed. He can shower in the morning, he just needs to sleep now and think later.

Hopefully, this works out…

—

The plan doesn’t really process in Carlos’s head until he’s sat next to Seb again at the board meeting. (Definitely unintentional blocking that they’re sitting next to each other, it just worked out that way.)

His entire day had been slowly dragging up to this moment, and any minute Kourtney would cut through with the song and they would jump up and start singing and dancing and hopefully pull this off.

Mr. Bowen had just finished speaking (turns out Carlos wasn’t the only one shocked by Ricky’s dedication to their cast), and Principal Gutierrez was now addressing his concern.

“Mr. Bowen, I appreciate your statement, but I think we can all agree that theater isn’t unique in this regard,” he sighs, and Carlos has to fight the urge to stand up and disagree with him.

Give it a moment…

“It doesn’t have some special fairy dust that can’t be filled by another extracurricular,” Principal Gutierrez finishes. Carlos is ready to stand up and contest himself by this point, but before he can, a loud hum cuts through the room.

Just in time, Kourtney.

As Principal Gutierrez frantically tries to find the source of the humming, the cast joins in as they all stand up together. Next to him, Seb gives him a smile before they launch into the song.

Don't say another word

Some of us need to be heard

You want her big confession

She never saw Dear Evan Hansen

Whatever you think about her

The show can't go on without her

And by some magic mixed with sheer force of will, they pull it off. Everyone comes in on time with their lines (they even gave Carlos one, which he thinks was Seb’s doing), and everyone dances around each other without running into each other.

The vocals and the choreographer is flawless, and he can see smiles on the faces of the parents growing as they perform. Even Miss Jenn goes along with it as Carlos grabs her hand and brings her to the front, her eyes twinkling as she watches her students. She doesn’t say anything, but he can practically hear what she’s thinking.

Now this, this is theatre.

It’s not a long song, the most they could write in their late night session, and just enough to get the point across. Before he knows it, he’s shooting Seb one last smile as they group together for the final verse.

She stands for truth, justice, and songs in our key

Jazz squares in the choreography

Sharpay and Ryan, you know they'd agree

She stands for us and we believe

They end the song with their hands out and jazzing surrounding Miss Jenn. It’s silent for a moment except for their heavy breathing, before Carlos hears clapping, and then more.

He turns to find every parent giving them a standing ovation, and it feels like the biggest weight in the world is lifted off of his shoulders. Over 24 hours of stressing and hard work and near panic attacks, and they pulled it off.

As Principal Gutierrez finalizes the decision to keep the show on by some miracle, everyone cheers, and Carlos finds himself hugging just about everyone in the cast. It’s like the complete opposite feeling of yesterday in rehearsal. He was at what felt like rock bottom, and now he’s on top of the world.

“How did you do this?” Miss Jenn asks as she approaches him, her voice thick with emotion.

“We stayed up all night,” Carlos tells her, laughing slightly. It’s surreal, in a way.

Miss Jenn looks like she’s on the verge of tears— which makes sense, they did just save her job— and she pulls him into a hug.

“Thank you,” she tells him when she pulls away, half shaking him as she does so.

Once she lets go, Carlos is about to go find his mom within the crowd when he remembers that there's still one person he hasn’t talked to yet.

As if on cue, a loud “Carlos!” cuts through the air, before Seb launches himself into Carlos’s arms. Neither of them says anything as he hugs the boy tightly, but this time, it’s not out of fear, but out of… well, you know.

“I can’t believe you did this,” Seb pulls back as he puts his hand on Carlos’s cheek, eyes shining. “You’re amazing,” he says almost breathlessly.

“I can’t believe we did this,” Carlos corrects, trying to ignore his burning face where Seb’s hand is. “And you’re pretty fantastic yourself.”

Seb’s face turns what Carlos can only imagine is a matching shade of red to his own. “Okay,” he says giddily, dropping his hand.

Just like at homecoming, Carlos wishes they weren’t in front of a crowd of people, so he could just lean in and kiss the other boy right then and there.

He doesn’t, because he assumes some of the Utah mom’s reactions might be worse than some of the students in their school. He still clings to Seb tight, though.

Maybe this week wasn’t what he thought it was supposed to be, but it was better.

#seblos #seb matthew smith #carlos rodriguez #hsmtmts #high school musical the musical the series #my writing #not a star

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justkimberley · 4 years

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HSMTMTS Thoughts Episode 1

Episode 2 Episode 3 Episode 4 Episode 5

Ms. Jenn watching HSM in her car is a mood

Ricky seems so excited to “start over” (oof)

She sounded neutral, that’s good right”

Ok, here’s the thing though… announcing that you love someone FOR THE FIRST TIME should be a private thing, not posted for the world to see (in my opinion).

Oof, Ricky’s face, that baby is not sure how to deal with love

“oh,”

So here’s the thing, at this point the audience doesn’t know this yet, but as I am rewatching this, I know what’s going on and Ricky at this point has no frame of reference where “love” works. He thinks that his parents are still in love (or at least he hopes), but his mom has been going away for long periods of time, he knows that their marriage isn’t doing too hot, and he is in the middle of it. Of course he couldn’t say it.

“It was a BREAK it wasn’t a break UP.” “ I’m sorry Ricky, but it’s a break UP now.”

*strong independent Nini face**sad and confused Ricky face*

Ok so like, I love Courtney and she gets better as the season goes on but the “I’m dismantling the patriarchy this year, and I’m not afraid to start with you,” was just,,, I don’t know I guess it just reminds me of the people that I went to high school/worked with that were all talk and buzzwords and no actual sustenance

The “interviews” where Nini’s like: “everything is great” and Ricky is like; “everything is terrible, love is dead” is hilarious and I love it

I love Big Red

Ugh… Miss Jenn is too much, (she might be my least favourite character I’m sorry) “triggered as a millenial” line also gross, thanks

Carlos - BABEY

Nini has some serious imposter syndrome

Carlos is NOT a HSM historian. You can’t have only seen the first movie all the way through and not seen the other ones.

BROADWAY

Mr. Mazzara, the epitome of my least favourite type of teacher

“We don’t call colleagues sweetie,” you know what? Point to you Mr. Mazzara, that is a thing we shouldn’t do. Very patronizing.

I feel like Mr. Mazarra would be more likable if he didn’t have a mustache? Weird thought but okay

“Looking this fabulous while also fighting for intersectional feminism IS my job” again, buzzwords and no sustenance

V hudge - uhhhh??? No one says that.

All the talented senior girls graduated last year” that is probably the most realistic line in the series

Yay finally good Courtney, actually showing us a little bit about who she is

EJ noticed Nini two years ago, why did he not talk to her until the summer?

I know what he does later is not good, but he does really like her and he cares about her, so at least that counts for something

Natalie! I forgot about her, I wish she had a bigger part in the rest of the show

Nini’s grandma and her moms!

Nini’s imposter syndrome returns

Ricky’s dad! He’s trying so hard to give Ricky’s mom space, and he’s stressed and obviously Ricky is aware, but at least his dad is trying to be reassuring “it’s gonna be fine bud”

Also why does nobody talk about how what Ricky’s mom is doing is kind of really shitty? Like she left her child for weeks at a time, without explaining what was going on?

“Shouldn’t he be fighting to save this?” *goes to fight to save his relationship*

“I’m actually bummed that we don’t have any competition here” - also a very realistic line but the cockiness needs to go (I’m guessing it might be a major point in his redemption. He’s definitely used to getting what he wants all the time, so it would be good to see him start to accept that that’s just not how life works)

Gina! - Sofia Wylie’s dancing, so good

Also, who is the guy with the grey/white hair? He’s one of my favourites.

Also how do they think that Gina should be Gabriella? She’s definitely more of a Sharpay, and if they want to go with a boy for Sharpay (we love Seb) then she should at least be Ryan (why not genderbend the both of them?). She should be someone who is super out there and has lots of musical numbers so she can dance and show off her talent and personality, Gabriella just isn’t that kind of character.

Also miss Jenn’s type casting is really not my thing (you look like a Taylor, you’re a Chad, etc. Should they not just choose who they want to audition for and then be put where they actually fit?)

“I dabble…” (Ashlyn, we love you) also why would Miss Darbus have a power ballad?

“This is my nightmare” *getcha head in the game on repeat *

That Armie Hammer comment is creepy, Miss Jenn

Once again, Gina is too much of a powershow for Gabriella. She’s not showing the vulnerability

Also a look into Gina’s home life that I forgot about. “If you’re not the best don’t do anything at all,” Yikes, total stage mom living vicariously through her daughter? Maybe?

That british accent thing is very strange and also never addressed again (so far) whyy? Why did they do it?? Does anyone in real life actually do this?

“That is why I love you” - *wide eyed flashback* also EJ, its been like one month, slow down tiger

“That’s a really big thing to post online” my thoughts too, Ricky

Okay so here’s my thoughts about Ricky calling the break. His mom has been away for a long time (because of the whole divorce thing) so in his mind, being far away from each other means that the love thing will kind of be messed up and also like his mom texts him right before and definitely reminds him.

It also gives us sight into what Ricky thinks will happen with his parents. He thinks as soon as his mom comes home for good that it will all be fine with his parents, and that’s not what happens (as we know from episode 4). This is also mirrored in Ricky and Nini’s relationship.

Also long distance for teenagers? (grade 10s going into grade 11 at that point) like that isn’t something they’ve ever been told could work

I’m not saying that Nini’s reaction isn’t valid, I’m just trying to explain what I think is going on with Ricky

Although Nini is the only person Ricky goes to for advice, so shouldn’t she kind of be aware of these issues? Although I guess Ricky’s not even very aware of what’s going on at this point either

“Troy would have arrived on time” incorrect - many people have mentioned this but like, Troy was always late. It’s a major plot point in all of the movies.

EJ’s “You got this babe,” is what caused Miss Jen to spill on the light thing and then made the lights go out → metaphor? EJ is actually stifling Nini by being so “supportive” (by accident)

“I’m not thrown,” queen! Literally 1. Boyfriend tells her he loves her causing slightly traumatic flashback 2. Ex boyfriend runs in to auditions for something he’s said he hates and 3. Lights get messed. We stan. Not thrown, what a legend. (and then proceeds to sing and face her dream fears)

Ricky! With the flashlight first, because he believes in her, EJ with his light because he needs to one up Ricky.\

RED! Coming to support his friend.

Temp -tress girl → then immediately improvises lines just to tell Nini that he loves her

“Was this in the movie?” Miss Jenn and Carlos → fake fans

“Cause that’s like not even a word your parents say to each other anymore” → he’s trying to explain his actions (or lack thereof). Also ow, that is a hard thing to hear.

I like Ricky’s version better than Nini’s oops

Also Nini is charmed by it, even though she doesn’t want to be → cue jealous EJ

Everyone subtly impressed, and also are like “awww”

“Don’t not love you” so quietly, this boy has emotional intimacy problems and he needs to talk to a therapist or something cause his parents are really messing him up with their divorce, or “legal separation” I guess. I don’t really know what the difference is.

Ricky’s face when Nini tells him he broke her heart → immediate regret

“I… don’t… not… love you,” oof

Nini and Ashlyn’s faces, my babies are so excited they got their parts!

Gina, shocked

“She thinks I’m a ChAd?”

Ricky looks so impressed with himself and he’s also like *play ball, let’s go boys*, Nini’s like *uh oh*, and EJ’s like *maybe I’ll slip him a rotten egg too*(oop ep. 4 spoilers)

#hsmtmts #hsmtmts spoilers #episode 1 #kimberleysthoughts #mypost #feel free to come yell into the void with me about this show #(the void is the name of my askbox lol)#kimberleyreacts

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mitchsmarners · 5 years

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what you wanted

pairing: dustin henderson/el hopper [henderhop] & mike wheeler/will byers [byeler] word count: chapter count: 1 of 2 summary: dustin never even considered that maybe he liked her as more than a friend. it’s el hopper. the chief's daughter. will’s sister. the coolest chick he’d ever known... the first person mike wheeler had ever loved. maybe the love of mike’s life. So... no. He didn’t like El. Not at all. Never even considered it.

read on ao3.

Will Byers liked to think he was observant. He noticed things that other people didn’t about his friends. Dustin was usually good at catching things with other people, and nobody knew Will better than Mike did. As they’d gotten older, it seemed that Lucas had gotten more and more oblivious to tells and subtle signs, but Will adored him anyway. Will could read everybody. He knew when El was having a bad day, when her sentences got shorter and stiffer. He knew when things weren’t good at home for Max, when she was sharper and meaner to Mike than usual. It used to bother Mike, until Will had explained his theory. Mike took it stride now, and he thought that maybe Mike and Max’s friendship was a little stronger now because of it.

Will was good at observing people, and he was pretty damn sure that Dustin Henderson had a crush on his sister.

He first noticed it at game night at Mike’s house about two weeks earlier. El always got excited about board games, especially checkers which she had always said was her favourite to play with Hop back in the cabin. Now, they rarely played checkers at game night because it was a two-player game (Will always offered to play whenever they went home, even though he’d never really been able to get the hang of the simple game) and it was supposed to be DnD night in truth. El hadn’t expressed that she was sad to not play checkers, because she’d understood, but Will had been able to tell. Before Will had had the chance to offer to play with El when they got home- because this was Mike’s first campaign since before the whole incident at Starcourt Mall, sue him for being excited- Dustin had jumped in and offered to sit out the game and play checkers with El.

Will had remembered thinking that was surprising, because the only person who had seemed more excited about Mike’s campaign than him had been Dustin. El had always been enthusiastic about DnD because it made her friends happy but she’d always gotten a little lost in the process, and Max had never played a Mike campaign before and had no idea what to expect. Lucas always got the same amount of excited for DnD. But Dustin and Will had been having long, overly excited conversations about this for weeks, since Mike had told them he was planning one, until Mike had gotten embarrassed and begged them to stop.

Yet here Dustin was- offering to skip out on the campaign he’d been so excited about- to play checkers with El. It had set instant alarm bells up in Will’s brain and he’d been watching them ever since. Noticing how Dustin would trade his Kool-Aid for El’s regular apple juice because El had tried Kool-Aid once and thought it was the most amazing drink, and Joyce never bought the fancy drink boxes. How Dustin would take the sit beside El without even seemed to think about it. How his cheeks would go bright red when El would laugh and squeeze his wrist.

After two weeks of careful watching, Will Byers came to a very serious conclusion. Dustin definitely had feelings for El, and he would never tell a soul about it. Will, albeit vaguely, remembered the time in eighth grade when Dustin and Lucas had both liked Max when she’d moved there. Will had- admittedly- had other things going on, and had missed most of the situation, but he still remembered how it had been after Lucas and Max had gotten together. The air of awkwardness that had settled over the Party, the way Dustin had pulled back. It had been the start of the falling out that Will had blamed on Mike, and it had taken Will a little too long to see that.

Given Mike and El’s history, Will knew that Dustin would never tell El about his feelings. Not when it had taken Mike so long to stop being a little dickhead about the whole thing. Mike had been going through something a lot deeper than just being dumped by his girlfriend, but without that extra information, to outsiders (anybody who wasn’t Will) it would’ve looked that way. The idea that Mike had been so in love with El would turn Dustin off completely. He’d never put the party at jeopardy.

Will Byers had never used to be a meddler, but maybe sometimes desperate situations called for desperate measures. But he couldn’t confront Dustin himself, no. That wouldn’t help anything.

Mike was laying across the mattress in New Castle Byers, comic book in hand and hair messed up from the wind. Will smiled for a moment, remembering the day in August when Lucas and Mike had showed up on his front porch with arms full of random tools and big grins on their faces, telling him they were rebuilding Castle Byers. It wasn’t the same, could never be, but Will liked this one just as much. Just differently.

“Mike.” Will called over to his best friend. He longed to use a more serious word, but he knew that Mike wasn’t ready for that. They’d had countless conversations about it, tearful and apologetic on Mike’s part, and utterly understanding on Will’s. He’d had a few years to fight with this himself (god, his own father had been shoving the thoughts into his head since he was a child) and Mike had had this thrust on him very unexpectedly. Will would happily give him the time he needed to be comfortable. At least he wasn’t suffering from a broken heart anymore, even if the waiting game got a little tiresome sometimes.

“Yeah?” Mike lowered the comic immediately, Will always quick to get his full attention. Will often wondered how it was nobody had figured them out yet. Will thought it must have been obvious, but Mike had always reminded him that you’ve always had my full attention, this isn’t anything new to people. And while Will would maybe argue the ‘always’ of it all, he couldn’t completely deny Mike’s point.

“I think Dustin likes El.” Will said, deciding to just rip the band aid off. He knew that Mike didn’t have feelings like that for El anymore, that Mike sometimes questioned if he had at all then shook himself off that road because he wasn’t ready for it, but Will still wasn’t completely sure how Mike would take that idea. “Like.... like likes her.”

Mike pulled a confused face, frowning and shaking his head slightly. “You... what?”

Will sighed and crawled up onto the mattress closer to Mike. They pressed together from shoulders to feet, and even though Will knew this moment wasn’t about them, he still felt a spark of excitement he always got from being so close to Mike Wheeler after so long of longing for it.

So he explained all his theories, everything he’d noticed and he watched it wash over Mike’s face slowly.

»»»

Mike started watching them, too, after talking to Will. He couldn’t deny that he saw it, too. How Dustin would sometimes be looking at El when she wasn’t paying attention, and how when she’d turn to him, he’d just smile at her. How they’d huddle over El’s math homework, talking quietly, Dustin teaching her the highlighter method and getting her grades up. How when Dustin’s mom took him IKEA to get some sort of random furniture to take up space in their home, he’d bring her back a cinnamon bun because he knew she loved them, but didn’t bring anything to anybody else.

Mike had felt blind a lot in his life before. Mostly involving Will, or El, or sometimes his parents. He knew he wasn’t the more attentive person sometimes. Dustin had said it himself one time, sometimes you total obliviousness just blows my mind, but Mike didn’t think he’d ever felt quite so blind before. How had he not noticed this? How had he needed this spelled out for him?

Mike decided to act. Acting had always been the better action that sitting on his thoughts and letting them stew. The day he decided that yes, Dustin liked her, he walked up to the Party at their lockers and asked Dustin to hang out after school.

“Sure, Mike.” Dustin said immediately. “What are we doing? Did you want to go see the new movie that opened up?”

“No, uh-” Mike cleared his throat awkwardly. “I actually meant... me and you. Just me and you. I need to talk to you.”

A silence settled over the Party then, as everybody looked at Mike. Max raised one brow, while Lucas and El wore matching expressions of confusion. Will had a look of apprehension, like he still wasn’t sure what Mike planned to do, how Mike was reacting to this. Mike give Will- and Will alone- a reassuring half smile.

Dustin didn’t seem confused or concerned at all, he just nodded and gave Mike a big grin. “Sure, man. Sounds good.”

Mike and Dustin met up at the front of the school like they always did, getting onto their bikes but instead of following the others towards their houses, Mike ushered Dustin in the other direction. They kept the conversation light as they rode, and Dustin seemed grow a little more uneasy as it clicked with him where they going.

Once they reached the top of the cliff, they dropped their bikes and Mike walked towards the edge. Dustin hesitated back, and Mike waved him over. Dustin still didn’t go as close as Mike was. “I come here sometimes.” Mike admitted, and well that... that was something he’d never told anybody. “To think. Do you remember the day I jumped?”

“Yeah,” Dustin replied, voice cracking. “Yeah, don’t think I’ll ever forget that, man. El saved you, broke Troy’s arm. It was badass.”

Mike knew that wasn’t the only thing about that day Dustin would never forget, and wondered if Dustin had nightmares about it, too.

“That was day you were telling me that Lucas was jealous of me and El,” Mike continued. “You told me because Lucas was my best friend and I could only have best friend. I told you were wrong, that you were my best friend, and Will, too. And you were wrong.”

“I know Mike.” Dustin said with a nod and small smile. “We were stupid kids, that’s what I thought. I know it’s true, we’re all best friends.”

“You’re my best friend.” Mike turned to Dustin, who seemed startled by Mike’s deep seriousness.

“Yeah...” Dustin said slowly, concern growing over his face quickly. “You’re my best friend, too, man. Are you okay?”

Mike nodded and took in a deep breath. “You like El. You like like her. I know you do.”

Dustin finally looked confused. “What? No I don’t. Mike, that’s crazy. What the hell are you talking about? I don’t like El... like that. That’s weird, that’s... that’s wrong, I don’t...”

“Come on, dude.” Mike let out a little laugh. “Do you really not know? Think about it. You do.”

Dustin started shaking his head. “No, I- I don’t! I’ve never thought about... I don’t...” His mouth stayed open a little gaped and looked up at Mike with panic in his eyes. “Oh my God, I... I like El! Fuck!”

Mike nodded slowly, starting to smile, but quickly loosing the smile when it was obvious that Dustin’s panic was only growing stronger.

“Oh my God, Mike, I’m sorry!” Dustin started stammering. “Is that why you brought me out here, are you going throw me off the edge? I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I won’t do anything I promise, I know you love her-”

Mike’s eyes widened comically and he reached out quickly to grab Dustin’s shoulders. “Whoa, whoa, whoa, dude! Breathe!” Mike shouted and waited for Dustin to finally calm himself slightly. Mike let out a chuckle. “I didn’t bring you here to kill you, man, come on. I think it’s... El and I aren’t a thing. I love her, but like... it’s not like that. Will and I, you know?”

The deeply confused and still slightly panicked look on Dustin’s face made it pretty clear that no, he didn’t know.

“We’re...” Mike cleared his throat. “Boyfriends... I guess.” Dustin’s eyes blew wide and Mike clapped a hand over Dustin’s mouth. “Shut up, shut up! I haven’t told anybody that, nobody knows! I haven’t even used the word boyfriend when talking to Will before so now I’m freaking out and we’re not talking about you so if you’re going to hate us or whatever, then just don’t tell me-”

Dustin stood there, one eyebrow raised until Mike lowered his hand and looked at him nervously. “I don’t hate you guys. We’ve defeated how many demons from other dimensions? I spend the night in an underground Russian lab! You and Will being queer, or whatever... that’s probably one of the least weird things to ever happen to our group.”

Mike let out a shaky breath he didn’t know he was holding. “And for what it’s worth... if El likes you back, I think... I think it would be nice if you were together. I do love her a lot, and you- I know you both would be good to each other.”

Dustin smiled little and kicked his toe into the dirt. “Thanks, Mike.”

“Yeah,” Mike nodded, smiling softly and blushing. “Uh. You, too.”

#henderhop #byeler #byler #stranger things fic #stranger things fanfiction #my writing

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bookwormlostinwonderland · 5 years

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tfc/hsm au

I`m still feeling utterly horrendous, so please bear with me if this is the worst thing you have ever heard. I`m so exhausted and practically rattling with medication at the minute, that I can`t tell. I mean, it sounded like a good idea when it came to me when I was in the middle of a midday nap…then again, I also thought it was a good idea to try and eat something an hour ago and I`m still regretting that, so, who knows? I`m not the best judge of anything at the moment, apart from the flu. I think I`m perfectly qualified to say that it isn’t very bloody fun.

Anyway, let’s start typing and see what happens! High school musical, meet the foxhole court!

-So Neil, our favourite exy obsessed boy, is still our favourite, exy obsessed boy. He`s going to play the part of Troy, only in this crazy mashup, he plays exy instead of basketball. He`s cute, dedicated to his sport, and most definitely doesn’t sing.

-Enter Andrew, he`s going to be our little genius, Gabriella, only with a little less cheer and adorableness.

-It`s New Year and Nicky, who has only recently taken the twins in, has dragged them off to some crappy party. He may have also just signed his own death warrant and signed them up for karaoke.

-When the time comes, Aaron is nowhere to be found and Andrew is sulking in the corner and frightening off anyone who dares try to speak to him

-Somehow, they manage to drag him onto the stage. Maybe Nicky bribed him, maybe it had something to do with this other kid they were pulling over, who looked even more apprehensive than he did

-When she found out Neil was going to spend the holidays doing nothing but practicing, Alison (also on the school exy team) dragged him along with her. Which he does appreciate, but he`d really rather have been left to his own devices. Now she`s forcing him to go to some damn party and all he wants is go to bed, he does not want to perform shitty karaoke, just so she can plaster the evidence all over social media.

-So anyway, they get dragged onto the stage, cursing their friends/family, glaring at each other, because they`d really rather be getting operated on without anaesthesia right now. Anything but this.

-The music starts and Andrew is about to storm off, because this guy is just standing there gormlessly, looking like a total flight risk, but then he just opens his mouth and…oh.

-Okay, so this guy can sing.

-Not that Andrew knows anything about singing. Or cares about it at all. He was never a tiny little seven year old, all excited about playing a big part in the school play, only for nobody to show up and watch him perform. He didn’t have to watch all the other kids get hugged and praised by their parents for playing the super important part of tree number 4, while he was left there alone and teary eyed, with the teacher giving him a pitiful look

-And crap, Nicky is probably filming this right now. He should run off the stage, he should go and punch him for signing him up for this. But this other guy is staring at him, and oh shit, it must be his turn, and oh crap he actually kinda likes this stupid song, and oh fine, whatever, he`ll sing the damn thing! It isn`t as though he`s ever going to see this guy again.

-Like the movie, they get really into it and he hates to admit it, but it`s actually kind of…fun. They talk afterwards and exchange numbers.

-Cue the first day back at school. Nicky has moved them all to a different place for a fresh start and wow, would you believe it, who does Gabriella/Andrew bump into within like half hour of being there?

-He also meets Bee, the drama teacher, who can`t stop going on and on about auditions for the school musical. There`s also Renee (Taylor) from the smarty-pants club, Jean (Kelsey), and the crown jewels of the school, the exy team (Neil, Dan, Matt, Alison, Seth, Thea, Jeremy, Alvarez and Laila.)

-In this world, the Moriyamas are the big guys in the entertainment world. You don`t want to cross them, not unless you are happy with the coveted role of background character number 17 being the crowning moment in your career.

-Riko and Kevin take on the role of Sharpay and Ryan. They`ve received the best training since they made their first steps/words. But because Riko is jealous Kevin is more talented than him, he is basically treated like a glorified background singer.

#tfc #the foxhole court #all for the game #aftg #tfc au #high school musical #hsm au #my post #i ramble about tfc

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olympivnshq · 5 years

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congratulations mona ! you mentioned cat called artemis and L lost her heart immediately. mine followed suit about 10 lines later. there is an ache in HELEN that you showed through your writing in ways we had imagined, but not quite delved into the way you did. we were curious to see what applicants for her would make of whether the trojan war was a result of an affair, or a pure abduction. we’re glad you picked one route and stuck to it. we’re excited to see how helen fares in the midst of the gods who started it all with your first faceclaim choice: ROSIE HUNTINGTON WHITELEY.

☆ﾟ*・ﾟ OOC INFO.

hi hi! i’m mona, i’m currently in the gmt+2 zone, and i actually own a cat called artemis :)

☆ﾟ*・ﾟ DEITY — GENDER. AGE RANGE.

HELEN OF SPARTA — FEMALE. 28-32

☆ﾟ*・ﾟ MORTAL NAME. JOB/OCCUPATION. BOROUGH/NEIGHBORHOOD.

HEDY HATHAWAY, ACTRESS/SOCIALITE, UPPER WEST SIDE, MANHATTAN, NY

☆ﾟ*・ﾟ AESTHETICS.

classical statues, paintings covered with dust, a silken ribbon forgotten on a bench, the clatter of a spoon against porcelain when stirring tea, the sensation of velvet against skin, pearls from a ripped necklace spilling on marble floor, rose petals, old perfume, gold and pearl jewelry, fields of roses and peonies, hazy afternoons & warm vanilla ,gold highlight & shimmer, lost momentos, soft wind, sad smiles, warm hugs, choral singing somewhere far away, sun shining through big windows and flowy chiffon curtains, gentle and loving touches, dancing with your eyes closed, equal parts mysterious and electric.

☆ﾟ*・ PLAYLIST.

i. will you still love me when I’m no longer young and beautiful? will you still love me when i’ve got nothing but my aching soul? // ii. housewife, beauty queen, homewrecker, idle teen. the ugly years of being a fool, ain’t youth meant to be beautiful? // iii. helen of troy is that your name stupid girl, stupid game - she cries all day, cries all night // iv. when i’m dead and gone, will they sing about me? dead and gone, will they scream my name? // v. mama said, you’re a pretty girl, what’s in your head it doesn’t matter - pretty hurts, shine the light on whatever’s worse, perfection is the disease of a nation // vi. in the land of gods and monsters i was an angel, living in the garden of evil // vii. she’s made of outer space and her lips are like the galaxy’s edge, and her kiss the colour of a constellation falling into place // viii. can nobody hear me? i’ve got a lot that’s on my mind, cannot breathe, can you hear it, too?

☆ﾟ*・ HOW WOULD YOU PLAY THEM?

helen of troy has always been defined by her face, a face that launched a thousand ships and started a war, and yet no one ever seems to care about the girl and soul hidden behind that mesmerizing face. beauty is a curse, a burden that comes in a disguise of a gift from gods, and helen knows this better than anyone else. she only has a face, but not a voice. she spends her whole life being controlled by various powerful men, ushered into their companies and later beds. there’s no one more alone in the world than helen of troy as she’s trapped in gilded cages and kept as some exotic bird. there are only those who wish to use her as a tool, such as her parents, husband and even the cruel gods for their little games of war, and then there are those that judge her and try to put all the blame on her, paint her as a whore, seductress and bringer of destruction in their songs, tales and poetry. but next to paris, she feels safe, understood for the first time, like she can finally make a choice in her life. and she does, she finally is allowed to make choices, she’s on a quest to enlightenment and a better life, a life in which she can decide what she wants. helen wants to have her voice heard and she wishes is to be free. she’s mostly been passive her whole life, unable to speak or take matters into her own hands, but rather she must follow the strict protocols and obey the rules others have written for her. yet helen isn’t a cruel woman despite all the loneliness and abuse, but she’s hopeful and free-spirited, always carefully waiting for the perfect moment to flee. if she could, she would trade her face with any other lady or princess, just so she could have a normal life.

a life filled with beauty, wealth and splendor was once again bestowed upon helen or rather hedy, but it all came with a very similar price indeed. hedy was born in a family filled with successful and ambitious people; a famous businessman for a father and a wealthy model for a mother with a keen eye for the finer things in life. as their only child, hedy had always struggled to live up to the high expectations of her parents, had always tried her best to make them happy while completely pushing her own happiness aside. from an early age, her mother started taking her to pageant shows, modeling and acting auditions, wishing to make a profit on her strikingly beautiful child; from a charming baby to a stunning toddler and teenager, people were practically climbing over each other to get a piece of hedy and make her their new shining star. hedy didn’t like any of it really, even in a room full of people and photographs she always felt profoundly alone, yet she never really had much courage to speak up to her parents. instead she would sneak out at night or when no one else was around and attend painting courses, cooking lessons, even parties, anything and everything that made her feel alive and less lonely. when she first got into the acting business, she had expected to finally be recognized for her hard work and not just face. but of course, she was a fool for thinking that. no matter how hard she had practiced or worked, she always got picked for similar roles, the beautiful damsel in distress, the pretty girlfriend of the main hero, the bond girl, a stunning girl without a name, the provocative but stupid blonde bombshell. her parents however were entirely pleased and so was the media and her fans. but her parents didn’t stop there as they went a search for a fitting husband. almost one year ago, she got engaged to a businessman who’s practically 15 years older than her, and while she does wear a pretty diamond ring on her finger just to please her parents, she knows that she will never marry him. among her peers, she’s known as a bit of a heartbreak among her peers, but that of course is only a facade as she wants to find someone who will truly love her for what she is and not just like her for the way she looks or what she owns. she’s learning how to be more independent and free, she’s learning how to grow and escape her parents’ shadow. she’s also become an advocate for women’s right and equality and with the help of other women, she’s learning how to love and respect herself, and never let anyone again use her as a puppet. most do see her a joke, a young, wealthy and beautiful girl like her simply cannot be unhappy, she is not allowed to be unhappy. they all claim she has everything, judge her at every possible opportunity, but hedy won’t let them get to her this time. she will fight for herself. she’s not happy, but she wants to find it, and she’ll try to seize it. one step at a time.

answer these questions: 1. are they more likely to stand with the pantheon or against it? she is more likely to stand with the pantheon, but truth be told, now she’d be quite indecisive. sometimes she feels as if the gods are simply playing with her for their own sickly-sweet entertainment. 2. what is their stand on mortals? she is a mortal and she’ll always be more fond of her own kind that the gods.

☆ﾟ*・ SAMPLE PARA (OPTIONAL)

’’ – miss hedy, miss hedy,’’ a man in a black suit calls, steady hands gripping a white phone ready to capture her every word and motion. she snaps out of her beautiful reverie, forgetting almost for a few brief moments that she’s supposed to be answering inquires and not imagining that she’s on a sunny beach somewhere with warm sand tingling beneath her toes. ’’yes?’’ she looks up, blue eyes steadily focusing on the impatient man. ’’this year you were once again named as one of the most beautiful actresses in the world, tell me how does that make you feel?’’ when she hears his inquiry, she sighs, chest trembling with disappointment.

didn’t anyone come to ask at least one single question about the movie? she asks herself, unwilling to face the truth. is that all she is? a pretty face that’s meant to be ranked with the others? a girl only born to be on display? she can almost hear the cry of thousands of women across the world, women only valued for the way they look, now for what they truly are. ‘’i’m honored. really. next question please.’’

an older woman from the audience raises her hand and with a soft smile she starts to form her question, and the more she talks the more hedy can see that her smile isn’t genuine. ‘’recently, the young and beautiful margo vera has been compared to you, from your similar career paths to looks, it’s sometimes hard to ignore the resemblance. do you see her as competition, miss hathaway?’’ she refrains from rolling her eyes, knowing that such behavior doesn’t suit a proper lady like her. in that instant she wishes they could all just leave her alone. hedy’s cherubic smile falters, but her lips are still curved upwards. ‘’no, of course not. why would i?’’

‘‘so are you saying that she could never match your looks?’’ the woman immediately jumps, searching for tiny pieces of flesh that she can fest upon like a true vulture. ‘‘no, no, i think she is extremely beautiful. i wish her nothing but the best. i’d even love to work with her,’‘ but what she wants to say is, i hope she’ll be more beautiful than me, i don’t want this, i don’t want this beauty, i’ve been carrying it all my life, but it’s too heavy for me. i want more from life. don’t you see that beauty isn’t everything?

‘‘with the recent beauty standards in the industry, do you think…’’ another man starts, but hedy stops him with a wave of her delicate hand. ‘‘that’s all for today. thank you all for coming. see you next time…’‘ she announces wearily. the wave of flashing lights before her is almost blinding.

–you look so beautiful today, smile for the camera one more time, miss hedy

– smile, i love your face

–hey over here, over here, stay for another question

it’s always like this. she’ll never be free.

☆ﾟ*・ ANYTHING ELSE?

pinterest board <3

#ohq:accepted #semi appless rp #lsrpg #literate rp #helen #helen of sparta

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bibhabmishra · 4 years

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Ghostbusters

I’ve read a lot of film books and they’ve taught me a few things about how film books should be written if they are to be taken seriously, and these are lessons that I feel are as useful in life: 1. Drop in random French phrases wherever possible so it looks like you’re quoting from the French film magazine Cahiers du Cinéma, because even if you don’t know what the hell you’re talking about, nobody will be able to tell; 2. When in doubt, start waffling on about Godard; 3. Never describe a film as your “favorite film.” This looks unprofessional and childish. Instead, claim—in ringing tones comme les écrivains de Cahiers du Cinéma—that it is the Greatest Film. Zut alors! Malheureusement, not all the French in the world could convince any- one that I am more interested in Godard than The Goonies, so that’s a non- starter. But I shall make use of one of these handy life lessons and state that the best, most brilliant, most extraordinary, the most deftly created piece of au- teur film work of all time is Ghostbusters. For pretty much most of my life, I’d assumed that this was a fact accepted by everybody: Ghostbusters is the greatest movie ever made. Sure, people tend to say random words like “Citizen Kane!” and “Vertigo!” when asked by Cahiers du Cinéma for their favorite film.

But I thought they did this just as, when asked who they’d like to have at their dream dinner party, they say, “Mother Teresa and Nelson Mandela!” as opposed to who everybody would actually like, which is, obviously, Madonna and Bill Murray. Now, one could take my massive assumption that my tastes reflect those of everyone else on the planet two ways: 1. I have an ego the size of Asia coupled with a narcissist’s complex and incipient sociopathic tendencies; 2. Ghostbusters is so good that even if it’s not everyone’s FAVORITE movie, it is probably in their top ten and so whenever I mention my love of Ghostbusters people say, “Oh yeah, everyone loves Ghostbusters.” For the purposes of this chapter, we will go with option 2. I never thought of my Ghostbusters obsession—and it is, I fully admit, an obsession—as remarkable. If anything, I saw it as a perfectly natural response to a great work of art. Devoting an entire shelf to books and articles by or about the people involved, however tangentially, in the making of this movie? Com- mendable intellectual curiosity. Spending two hundred dollars on a book about Ghostbusters that came out the year the film was released, just because it finally explains why the character of Winston is squeezed out of the movie? Hey, that’s an investment piece! Refusing to go on a second date with someone be- cause they failed to recognize a completely random (and not, to be honest, wildly relevant) Ghostbusters quote over dinner?I Well, why waste time with losers? It wasn’t until I found myself awake at 2 a.m. at the age of thirty-three on a Tuesday scrolling through eBay in search of a rumored copy of Bill Mur- ray’s original Ghostbusters script, which obviously was not going to be on eBay, that I felt it might be time to look at what, precisely, was going on here and why, after all this time, Ghostbusters still feels so special, maybe even more spe- cial, to me. There is sentimentality, for sure, not exactly for my childhood but for the city of my childhood. Ghostbusters is as much a love letter to New York as any- thing by Woody Allen, and a less self-conscious one at that, showing New Yorkers reacting with relative normality to an invasion of the undead.II Many of the jokes in Ghostbusters stem from the idea that, ghosts aside, Manhattan it- self is an out-of-control Wild West place, a Gotham city where a man could collapse against the windows of the Tavern on the Green, the ritzy restaurant that used to be in Central Park, and the diners would simply ignore him. Trash is piled on the sidewalks and Checker cabs whizz around corners: this re- creation of New York, 1984—the New York of my childhood—is still how I think of the city, even though it has, for better or worse, changed a lot since then. Even the hilarious anachronisms give me a sentimental frisson: Louis being mocked for his love of vitamins and mineral water; Ray and Peter snarfing down cigarettes while toting nuclear reactors on their backs; Larry King in a cloud of cigarette smoke while chatting drily on the radio; the bad guy being the man from the Environmental Protection Agency. These all look particularly out of date in the Manhattan of today, and I can’t help but feel the city is a little poorer for it. But my absolute favorite New Yorky moment in the film is at the end, when a doorman brings Ecto1 round after the Ghostbusters have saved the world—or at least Central Park West—from destruction. Despite having battled a giant marshmallow man, Dan Aykroyd still has a couple of dollar bills in the pocket of his ghost uniform with which to tip the doorman. You cannot get more New York than that. But there is something else in Ghostbusters that makes me sentimental, something else that I love in it that doesn’t exist anymore. That is, its depiction of how a man should be. • • • Just in terms of sheer variety, one could do a lot worse than turn to eighties movies for lessons in how to be a man. When most people think of mas- culinity in eighties movies, they probably think of that strange genre that sprouted and bulged up in that decade like Popeye’s biceps after eating spinach, consisting of men who look like condoms stuffed with walnutsIII speaking their lines in confused accents and emphasizing random syllables, strongly suggesting they’d learned the words phonetically: Schwarzenegger, Lundgren, Stallone,IV and, toward the end of the decade, Van Damme. Chuck Norris, too, can be included here, despite his lack of walnutness, but he earns membership in this group with his similar lack of obvious acting talent and strong fondness for right-wing messages in his films.V But there is more to eighties men than that. For a start, there are the men who raise babies and children (Mr. Mom, Three Men and a Baby, Uncle Buck), which some feminist critics argued at the time was a backlash against femi- nism because the films seemed to mock the idea of feminized men. In fact, in retrospect, these films look more like movies awkwardly coming to grips with feminism (Tootsie, too, can be included here, with a man pre- tending to be a woman, and occasionally looking after a child, and becoming a better person for it). Mr. Mom (1983), in which Michael Keaton loses his job and looks after the kids while his wife works, is clearly none too sure what to make of this “feminist” thing: the movie’s message is that the swapping of traditional gender roles will probably destroy the marriage and almost certainly the house (somewhat dismayingly, the film was written by John Hughes). But by 1987, Three Men and a Baby was getting much more of a handle on things. The men (Tom Selleck, Steve Guttenberg, and Ted Danson) are unex- pectedly lumbered with a baby girl and, by the end of the film, very much want her to stay with them in their bachelor shag pad, even after the baby’s dippy English (foreigners—tchuh!) mother turns back up. It turns out that, unlike Mr. Mom, they are capable of looking after a baby without causing havoc to domestic appliances (men—amirite??). The men in Three Men and a Baby are

notably much less obnoxious than les mecs in the original French version, Trois Hommes et un Couffin, who have a pact never to let a woman stay more than one night in their flat and have a tendency to call the baby “a swine” when it has an accident on the sofa. Ahh, les Français—ils sont tres masculins, ooh la la!VI Which is not to say that the American version is without its anxieties. Three Men and a Baby goes to such lengths in order to reassure audiences of the übermasculinity of the three guys, despite their TERRIFYINGLY FEMINIZED baby-raising skills, that they become hilariously camp. Peak camp is reached, for me, when Selleck goes out jogging wearing little more than a tiny pair of shorts and an enormous mustache, and he picks up a sports magazine full of photos of muscled-up half-naked men. Now, if that isn’t the definition of throbbing heterosexual masculinity, I don’t know what is. Yes, the eighties were a different time and American movies in that era seemed to think that homosexual was merely Latin for “psycho killer or flouncy interior decorator.” But nonetheless, whenever I watch this movie (which is more often than I’m going to commit to print) I think it’s a shame the director (who was the late Leonard Nimoy, very pleasingly) didn’t just go with the obvi- ous option here and make the guys gay, living in a happy yuppie ménage à trois. After all, this would explain why three apparently very solvent guys in high- flying careersVII in their thirties would choose to share an apartment in mid- town Manhattan as opposed to getting their own American Psycho–style bach- elor pads. And for heaven’s sake, have you looked at that Broadway-themed mural Steve Guttenberg paints of the three of them in the atrium of their apart- ment? No amount of references from Selleck to his love of sport can obscure the fact he and his two friends are living in the campiest New York apartment north of Fourteenth Street. These guys—the actor! the architect! the car- toonist!—are basically the eighties yuppie version of the Village People. And let’s talk about that homoeroticism! Accidental homoeroticism is yet another one of the great joys of eighties movies, and it was the last decade that would be blessed with the pleasure because from the nineties onward, gay cul- ture and references would be too mainstream and recognizable to slip past studios unnoticed. The plethora of eighties buddy movies easily and frequently tip into acci- dental homoeroticism, with the female characters being explicitly excluded from pretty much the whole film and all sorts of intense emotion between the two male leads. Lethal Weapon is one example and an even more obvious one is Stakeout, in which Emilio Estevez and Richard Dreyfuss spend an entire movie living together in faux domesticity and, in the case of Estevez, voyeuris- tically spying on his male partner’s sexual encounters. The Lost Boys is the most blatantly homoerotic mainstream movie ever made for teenage boys. In this film, young Michael (charisma vortex Jason Patric) is initiated into the manly life of a new town by going into a cave with Kiefer Sutherland and his male buddies (none of whom seems the least bit interested in the fact that a half-naked Jami Gertz is wandering around drunk- enly in front of them) and drinking their body fluids. Sure, why not, right? Vam- pires are inherently homoerotic and the director Joel Schumacher (who later homoeroticized Batman—not difficult, admittedly—by sticking nipples on the batsuit) revels in the connection in this movie in a way Twilight later deter- minedly, somewhat dismayingly avoids. Michael does at some point have what looks like deeply unsatisfying sex with Jami Gertz, but the person he gazes at with the most intensity is young Jack Bauer. And I haven’t even mentioned that Michael’s little brother Sam (Corey Haim), who dresses like he’s trying out for Wham!, has a poster on the door of his closet of Rob Lowe lifting up his shirt. Because sure, why not, right?

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harryspaceshipmchale · 7 years

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hey there, Pidge. jeff x annie: 58, 61, 90, (and 94 unless you have a limit) heh ;)

Send a number and I’ll write an angsty fic.

Hey! Did you enjoy your movie?

So turns out my ficlet for #58 ended up being 1.5k words so… have this instead of all of them. Although you can also have a fic you’ve already read for #90 (if you’re reading this and you’re not Janine, then it’s new to you! Come read!), even if it’s not an exact prompt fill - it’s on a similar vein and I may as well make use of it.

I’ll put these on AO3 soon.

S5 AU

58. “What I feel for you terrifies me.”

Annie’s not sure how it happens exactly, emphasis on exactly. One minute they’re reminiscing over Troy because it’s officially been a month since he’s been sailing the seven seas and the next they’re going back down memory lane just for old times’ sake, just for the five of them.

They’re all outside Jeff’s apartment after having dinner when the topic of Troy arises and because it’s a fairly warm night out for the time of year, they end up sitting on the steps outside of his block, with Shirley stood up on the bottom step, leaning against the railing because she doesn’t want to ‘dirty her skirt’.

Slowly but surely Shirley becomes tired of standing and it triggers a chain reaction of everyone wanting to leave one by one. Britta says she has a shift at her new bar to get to and Abed has to study for a quiz in the morning so they all leave with their genuine excuses but for some reason, she just shrugs at Abed when he asks if she’s coming and stays put.

She and Jeff haven’t spent much time alone together since, well, she’s not entirely sure when so, later on, she wonders if that’s the reason she stayed behind; some part of her subconsciously wanting to know if they ever even can again.

Jeff doesn’t stand when everyone else goes to leave so they’re sat side-by-side when they’re left alone. He’s pouting in thought, his hands clasped between his bent legs as he hunches over and she wants to know what he’s thinking; maybe he’s wondering why she’s still there or maybe he’s just letting all of the emotions of the night set in - they’d had fun over dinner, all laughter and playful bickering as usual but it was inevitable that one of them (Shirley) would get teary eyed when the Troy-shaped gap was highlighted. She doesn’t have to ask though because he breaks the silence for the both of them.

“Do you remember Troy and Abed’s moving in party?”

She raises an eyebrow at him whilst he’s not looking, presuming he’s just carrying on with the evening of reminiscence.

“It’s hard to forget.”

“I hit my head on the ceiling fan before I was about to go home.”

Annie lets herself smile at that because she sees him squint in amusement.

“Oh yeah… and I was worried you wouldn’t be able to drive home because I thought you might be concussed.”

He smirks and shakes his head before smiling back at her goofily.

“How would I get a concussion from hitting my head on a ceiling fan?”

“I don’t know… I thought you hit it badly. Or maybe you just acted like you did to get my attention.”

As she soon as she says it she scrunches up her shoulders as if a stiff breeze has passed them even though the leaves on the trees around them are barely moving. She’s so used to him responding badly or taking things the wrong way or too far that she has to prepare herself for brushing it all off and forgetting, especially these days when he barely talks to her at all.

“And why would I do that?” He asks, looking over his shoulder as he continues to sit forward from her. She shrugs, attempting to move the conversation swiftly onwards. Again, he’s one step ahead of her, already on to the next memory that comes to mind.

“I remember your moving in party. Well, I remember making it into one, by bringing beer.”

“Yeah, thanks so much for the help.”

He grimaces and looks jokingly ashamed for a moment or two.

“I never saw your first place, did I?”

She sighs, realising she hasn’t thought about her cramped little two room apartment in a while.

“I should have moved out long before then.”

He sits back, his hands going behind them on to the cold expanse of the top step, not bothering to care if anyone decides to leave and walk out whilst they’re sat there.

“You were going to though, right? With Vaughn?”

She hasn’t thought about him in a while, either; there’s been no need to. She let him go from her life years ago, all the way back on that fateful night when she’d kissed the man sitting beside her.

“I guess.”

She can hear Jeff swallow even as a car drives past so she knows what he’s about to say has some thought behind it. They’re tiptoeing around a rather touchy time in both of their lives, one that crosses and intertwines like how their bodies pressed together when Jeff stood forward and responded to her kiss. It scares her a little and it makes her regret not just getting up to go with Abed in the first place.

“Why did you only tell me?”

She knows what he’s referring to of course and luckily the answer isn’t too hard to admit. It doesn’t give much away.

“I knew you wouldn’t judge me.”

He watches her and then lowers his head as if he’s questioning if that assumption is true or not. She wonders what it would feel like to push it further, see how far they can go before he washes it all away; stands up and tells her he isn’t feeling too good or that he’s just remembered he has to call his mom for the first time in a while because otherwise, she’ll be asleep.

“Maybe you would now, though.”

It’s not hard to believe he would, truthfully. It’s not hard to imagine him telling her she’s throwing something away to chase someone who doesn’t love her. It’s not hard to imagine him telling her she should wait until someone better comes around. It’s not hard to imagine him telling her a hundred and one things that are wrong with the person she’s following and how he won’t treat her the right way as if he knows it all. It’s not hard to imagine him thinking he’s well-intentioned, either. It is, however, hard to imagine him asking the next question until he does.

“Why did you kiss me?”

Whilst she’s still lingering onto how he might respond to her moving on from Greendale now, he’s still holding onto that moment and for a second she wants to laugh. She wants to laugh but she ends up biting her lip and scrunching up her face as tears threaten to form on her waterline. She shrugs a couple of times and goes over different answers in her head, her lips quivering not because of the emotions welling up inside of her but because she’s rehearsing what to say before it escapes her aloud.

“Because…” Her voice is a whisper and he lowers his head, feeling guilty, “…I thought we were on the same page.”

She shrugs again, hopelessly.

“Because… I wanted to.”

She doesn’t want to know what he’s thinking now. She honestly just wants to be free of it all.

“You hurt me. You kissed me back and you acted like it was nothing and maybe it was to you but you knew it wasn’t for me.” She’s crying now and she doesn’t care. “You never said sorry. You knew I was hurting and you never said sorry. After all this time, you never said sorry.” She takes a shaky breath and whimpers as he tilts his head back, looking up to the sky and his building towering up behind him.

After a while, Jeff mumbles, “I know” and it makes Annie turn away and hold her hand to her face to avoid breaking out into an embarrassing sob. She wipes under her nose before turning back because she’s gone this far; she has to know.

“Can I ask you one question?” He has to say yes, so he nods and lets her ask it, “Did you really regret it? I don’t need you to say sorry now, it won’t fix anything, I just need to know if you really did.”

He’s pouting again but this time it’s different because he’s moving his lips around and chewing on the insides of his cheeks. She’s not sure why she needs to know but she knows one thing for certain; she won’t be able to hold it together whether he says yes or -

“No.”

She closes her eyes again, tight and shut so she can’t let herself cry again.

“What I feel for you terrifies me, Annie,” Jeff admits, his breath shaky. She can’t see it in the dark light but his eyes are glossing over too. She might have questioned what he’s saying if she’d been more composed but instead, she lets herself understand it, if only to a certain degree.

“I just want us to be normal again.” She breathes out, letting herself fall and lean on his shoulder. He doesn’t hold her close, just rests the side of his chin on her hair.

“Me too.”

And maybe it doesn’t fix anything. But also, maybe it fixes everything.

Post-S6

90. “You think I’m better than you? You’re better than me!”

(A variation of)

When he realises she’s been gone too long for her to have just popped to the bathroom, he excuses himself from the table and scours the rooms and hallways of the bar, his phone in hand just in case, before swinging the back door open to see if she slipped out instead. His instincts are correct but there’s no relief to it because nobody goes to the bathroom and ends up outside for a good reason and usually said person never went to the aforementioned bathroom in the first place.

“Annie?” Jeff calls out, his hand still on the door just in case she’s on the phone or is heading back inside any second. She just hums in response though and wipes a hand across her cheek. He frowns, confused, before joining her, the door clicking shut behind them, the low buzz and mumbles from inside disappearing.

“Hey, what’s going on?” He stands to her side, a little puzzled by the expression on her face; he can only describe it as sad and upset. His hand jumps to her arm, smoothing down it comfortingly like he always does now.

She waves a hand and shrugs his hand off a little, trying to force a smile to break through.

“Nothing, I just came out for some air. It’s stuffy in there.” She nods her head back towards the bar where Britta, Frankie, Craig and Chang are to be found inside. And Bob too because he’s friends with Jeff now. That’s what happens when other people leave; they’re not necessarily replaced, it’s just that other people find their ways to fill in the gaping hole.

“Don’t lie to me.” He says softly, shaking his head, trying to get a real answer.

“It’s nothing.” She drops her chin, looking over to a puddle in the tarmac in front of her, the muddy water mixed with oil leaking from a car, swirling into a strangely pretty pattern of purples and blues. “I’m fine.”

Jeff lets his shoulders fall with a sigh, glancing at the dark sky before stepping forward and placing both of his hands on her this time. He cranes his neck so there’s less distance between them.

“What’s wrong? Are you okay? Did you… get some bad news or something? Tell me.”

“Jeff, I’m fine, okay?”

His grip tightens around the tops of her arms, over the top of her navy sweater that matches with his shirt.

“No, you’re not. You’re stood in the parking lot whilst we’re all waiting for you back there.” He laughs a little, still trying to work out what went wrong, “I’m celebrating. I thought we were having fun?”

“Yeah, I know, you’re celebrating.”

Jeff tilts his head and squints, making her close her eyes as his tightened grip loosens, realising she might have let it slip.

“Annie?”

She smiles but it’s only told hold it in as folds in her lips and bites down before letting a breath go as she exhales shakily.

“I’m,” Her voice breaks and Jeff’s eyes widen, a comical casino game spinning through his mind, waiting for her words to align the ending of her sentence which could have endless outcomes, “jealous.” Tears prick her eyes as she avoids his own as much as she can, “I’m jealous, okay? I’m jealous.”

Jeff’s eyebrows shoot up in surprise, confusion still running right through him.

“You're… jealous? Of…? A party? Because, I can throw you one any day, just give me an occasion. I’ll get banners and balloons or whatev-.”

“It’s not that.” She cuts him off, making it clear that she’s not about to explain what it is, however.

“You’re jealous… of…?” He huffs out and steps back and tries to rack his brain, “You’re jealous of the fact I got my first real job at age forty-three?”

When she doesn’t say anything he rubs a hand across his jaw.

“Wow. I was… not expecting that. It’s funny because I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you. I wouldn’t have gone to all of those interviews. I went to them because I thought, you know what? If I can get just one, I know it will make Annie happy. She’ll be proud of me and I want that. And I thought you were but it turns out… you're… jealous? Annie, what have I got that would make you think that? We literally share the same apartment. We live together. I’m not hiding anything else. I love you.”

In the blurry corner of his eye, he can see Britta open the back door and watch them for a second before walking back in again, letting them be.

“It’s not that,” Annie says, succumbing to having to explain in greater detail. “I just… I guess I realised that I’m not over it. I thought that I was over not having what I wanted. I thought I’d grown, you know? I thought I knew that I was okay with what I have but now I just feel like… that maybe I’ve failed myself or something. And now, you have what you want but… I don’t know if I do. And I am proud of you. I’m so proud of you and I’m so happy for you. I feel awful that I’m out here crying about nothing.”

“Annie, come on, what more could you want? You’re twenty-six, you’re gradu-.”

“I know I am. But you’re not.” She raises her voice a little, trying to argue her point.

“Uh, yeah, I know, I don’t need reminding.”

“That’s not what I mean. You don’t get it. All of my friends, they’re out there getting full-time jobs and starting their careers and starting to think about buying a house and having kids and starting a family and I just feel like I’m not going anywhere. I know things have changed but I still feel like I haven’t followed any of the dreams I used to have.”

Jeff almost wants to rewind then, stop her in her tracks.

“No, no, you’re mistaken. I do get it, trust me. I’ve been twenty-six for almost two decades. It’s taken me until this week to get a real job that I didn’t lie my way into because when I was your age, I really screwed up. And yeah, maybe this is where it gets a little awkward between us because… I’ve been there, Annie. But, there’s also a positive to that. You’ve got me. I can help you through it. It sucks knowing there are always going to people out there who seem to have it better than you or who seem to have it all figured out but Annie, from the day I met you, I’ve always thought, wow, this woman has figured out more than I ever will. She knows what she wants and she’s gonna’ get it.”

“And I really hate to say this and I’m so glad it doesn’t affect us in any other way because I love you but… when you get to forty, you’re gonna look back and realise how young you were. If I could go back and start over when I was your age, I’d do it in a heartbeat. But you’re not gonna have to do that because you’re not going to regret anything and if you do, well, I’m not doing a good enough job. Also, if you ever want to change your mind on things then it’s fine to do that. I wish I’d realised that sooner, too.”

She’s listening intently, nodding when necessary, rolling her eyes and holding back more tears.

“Look, if we cut it even tighter than we are, with this new job, we can get a house in the next two years. It might be small but we could do it. And if you want kids earlier than you thought, then, we can go home now and try. I’ll get my car.”

She rolls her eyes again and he smiles, getting through to her.

“Seriously, you have nothing to worry about. I do get it but it’s just… life. You’re gonna’ graduate with your Masters and within a month you’ll be making me pack up my stuff to ship it across the country because you’ve got a job for some fancy forensics organisation.”

She laughs a little sadly as he steps into her space again now that he knows he’s making himself clear and understood.

“You may laugh but guess who was laughing when you said I’d actually get an offer? I couldn’t have done it without you and I’m gonna’ make sure you won’t be able to do it without me either. Although, that’s practically impossible because you could do everything on your own.” Her hands find his but he lets go to lift her chin up with the tip of a finger, “See? Look how good I am at pep talks.”

“I’m sorry.” She whispers, sniffling simultaneously.

“Don’t be. You have nothing to apologise for.”

“I ruined your evening and made it about me.”

“You didn’t ruin anything and it’s not my evening. Nothing’s just about me anymore. It’s about us.” He kisses her forehead whilst leaning forward, letting her fall and press her cheek into his chest. “Speaking of which, can we go and have a drink together with the others?” She nods before rising up and hugging him firmly around the neck. He swallows by her ear and closes his eyes over her shoulder before speaking again, low and quiet.

“You have nothing to worry about. You’re always going to outshine everyone, especially me.” He kisses her shoulder as she leans into him even further.

“You know people are going to think I’m only with you for your money now, right?”

He chuckles against the nape of her neck.

“You know you’ve been with me too long when that’s your way of lightening the mood now, right?”

“I’ll never be with you for too long.” Annie breathes out before shaking any other thoughts away by stepping back and straightening herself out.

“Has my makeup run?” Jeff squints to see in the light but just smooths the pad of one of his thumbs under her eye before shaking his head.

“No, you just look beautiful.”

She takes his hand so they can walk back inside to re-join the table. Jeff sits down beside her and swings his arm over the back of her chair and the conversation between the group starts flowing again. Bob flicks up his chin from the opposite side of the booth.

“You guys pop out for a quickie?”

“Nah, I’m a classy lawyer now.” Jeff wriggles his eyebrows as Annie frowns in disgust.

“Pfft, you’re barely a lawyer now, you’re only a consultant.” Britta spits out.

He shrugs confidently and leans his head against the top of Annie’s as she talks to Frankie to her side.

“Better than nothing.”

#jeff x annie #jeff x annie fic #prompts #prompt fic #zacscottysnl #puff #SO MANY WORDS #I cried writing both of these just so y'all know #mine #my fic

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viktorredemptionarc · 7 years

Text

Fic: I’ll go jock-casual, you can do formal-goth [JayceViktor]

A/N: Available @ AO3 too. This is the +11k words high school au that nobody (one person) asked for and I couldn’t get out of my head.

Word Count: 11.021.

Characters/Relationships: Jayce/Viktor.

Rating: T for language.

Summary: Senior year is going great for Jayce until Viktor happens.

The Science Fair of his senior year is supposed to be the highlight of Jayce's high school career. The event that'd put every other experience to shame, the greatest moment of his youth.

No matter how sad Vi thought that this idea of his was. Or the fact that she was the only person alive allowed to know.

It was important to him; and if she couldn't get that, the problem was hers. Jayce got her point, vaguely. He'd been dragged to enough high school parties to get why she thought they were cool, but what was cooler than having your scientific talent recognized in front of the full student body?

Nothing, if you asked him.

Virtually anything, if you asked her.

He's pretty confident in his win. He's won every single year without fail. And he's proud of what he's done, too. It's nothing special, is what he's going to say when asked, just a simple super-capacitator to optimize electronic devices' charging time. No biggie.

Child's play, really.

But when his time to be judged comes, no questions are asked. No surprised gasps come. No thinly veiled admiration is delivered. The judges leave his table in silence, and Jayce fights a battle with himself to keep a forced smile plastered on his face until they're done judging everybody else.

What. The. Hell.

He looks around, and sees nothing but mediocrity staring back at him.

That is until he makes eye contact with The New Kid, smirking by a fully functional mechanic prosthetic arm displayed on his table as if it's no big deal.

As if prosthetic arms don't cost around eight thousand dollars, on the cheap side.

Jayce breaks eye contact and frowns at the device on his table as he feels something that he rarely experiences.

Fear. Insecurity.

Envy.

The horrifying, dreadful, and paralyzing idea that he didn't work hard enough and now that new kid with the ugly black skinny jeans and the combat boots is going to snatch his prize away because he got too comfortable. Too accustomed to winning, too careless to try harder.

Which is absurd, because he knows that he worked his ass off on it. And he's gotta have faith in it. Who is going to if he doesn't?

Jayce collects himself, takes a deep breath and avoids looking at the new kid until the judges are done. And they stand in the middle of the gym.

And the Physics teacher holds the mic to his mouth.

And declares Viktor Evans the winner of the Science Fair.

-x-

On his first day of high school, Viktor thought that he had stepped inside an obscure cult's headquarters by mistake.

Everywhere he went, everyone he talked to, they all shared one thing: Jayce Sawyer.

Whether it were the student council presidency posters, the football team propaganda or the whispers around the halls, Viktor couldn't take a single step without having to deal with this guy, whoever he was. Which, to be fair, did raise his curiosity to an extent for the first few hours.

Even though it had died by oversaturation by the time he finally laid eyes on the one and only Jayce Sawyer himself.

Jayce entered Contemporary Literature running and out of breath, and Viktor raised an eyebrow from his sit. He was...just as one would expect the star of the football team to be. Exactly as every teen movie told you that the most popular dude in school was. He was handsome, and athletic, and tall, and broad shouldered, and Viktor hated him since the very second he opened his mouth.

"Sorry Miss B," he said. "I had a meeting with the boys, you know how they get."

Then he winked, and Viktor not only hated him, but took the executive decision to never in his life speak to him.

-x-

"How did you manage to build a fully functional mechanical prosthetic arm without having to sell a kidney?" Viktor considers ignoring him. It has worked, so far. Jayce didn't know who he was, Viktor had to deal with the entirety of the student body mythologizing him to the point of absurd devotion, fear, and hatred, neither of which Jayce seemed to be aware of. It worked for everyone.

He closes his locker and turns away from Jayce, only mildly surprised when he grabs at the sleeve of his jacket.

"Hey, I'm talking to you," Jayce frowns at him when he turns around with a sigh, holding his books to his chest. This is...not a very good situation to be in. Not one he's wanted to be in, ever. His only motivation to even try to do good at the Science Fair were scholarships, pissing Jayce off was a surprising and welcomed bonus.

Until now.

"Yes, I gathered as much," he says, slowly, and Jayce lets go of his sleeve and crosses his arms scowling. "I was trying to ignore you and see if you'd go away, but no such luck."

Jayce bristles. "Do you know who I am?"

"Is it possible not to?" Viktor gestures at the walls, covered as they've been since he got there in Jayce's face and the words PAVE THE WAY in neon green.

Jayce makes a very odd thing with his face, that looks like he's in pain but also angry. Viktor drums his fingers on the cover of a book. If Jayce doesn't say anything in ten seconds, he's leaving.

He's gotten to eight when Jayce snaps.

"But seriously. Why? How? Where did you even get the materials to build that?"

Maybe Jayce was like a band-aid. The fastest you dealt with him, the fastest you could go on with your business and the least it'd hurt.

"Scholarships. Effort and wires. I rented a 3D printer, cuts the costs by more than a half," he says, barely even pausing, and Jayce blinks at him and gapes. "There isn't any more to it than that, and I would appreciate it if you'd stop harping on it. Sorry your ego got stung?"

"It's not..." Jayce pauses and frowns, and Viktor is losing his patience. "It is a bit about my ego. I just needed to know, okay? The Science Fair was important to me."

Viktor does not believe for a second that Jayce Sawyer, jock extraordinaire, thinks that the Science Fair is more important than any other football match. Not that he blames him, but it would be nice not to be lied to.

But whatever.

He does know that Jayce has been winning first place in the Science Fair since he was in freshman year, though.

Intriguing.

Yet not enough to make him ask.

"Fascinating. Can I go, now?"

"I'm not holding you at gun point, am I?" he makes to leave, he does, but Jayce holds his sleeve again and Viktor would like to say that yeah, maybe he isn't holding him at gun point but he sure as hell is fond of clinging to him like an asshole. "Wait. I didn't mean why in that way. I. Just. Why a mechanical prosthetic arm?"

He sounds pained, and Viktor gets it. A little. Not like a super-capacitator is any less of a flamboyant choice, but. Yeah. True.

"I like cybernetics and reading on their implementation in everyday life," Jayce snorts, which rude, but Viktor loathes to comment and having to talk to him for another minute. "I'm going to be late for Physics C, can I go now?"

Jayce shrugs and waves him off.

Viktor is late for Physics C. Jayce is already there when he arrives.

-x-

Vi's room is obnoxiously pink, and Jayce is aware that it's a declaration of war to all and any who ever dared think or say that she wasn't girly enough. As is her hair, which is also hot pink. She defies the world with every step she takes, a walking paradox, and Jayce wouldn't have her any other way.

Which doesn't make her pink walls hurt his eyes any less, with how saturated the color is.

"I painted it last week," she smiles, pointing at it proudly, and Jayce sniffles. "Don't be a baby. It's intense, yeah, but you just gotta get used to it."

"If you say so..."

She smacks his shoulder and sits on her bed by his side, smirking. Jayce knows that look, and it's one he doesn't like.

"Prom is coming," oh no. No please, no thanks. Prom is awful. Prom is hell. Prom is the very thing he's been dreading since he was ten and his mom let him watch Carrie with her. Prom is something awful that always ends in tragedy. A dark mark in his teenage years that will embarrass him to remember forever. "You asking any hunk out?"

As if. Vi is the only person in the world, including his family, who he's out to. It's a matter of reputation and fear. He's every teenage movie fantasy rolled into a single person, the Troy Bolton of Piltover with just enough Danny Zuko thrown in the mix to keep it interesting. It's how he naturally is. Gifted. Not his fault.

It comes with its perks.

Like the risk of ruining the status quo, with which he's pretty comfortable with thanks, by being out. And being more or less obligated to attend prom.

Jayce avoids her inquisitive look and coughs. "No, I don't think so. Any chicks in your radar?"

He dodges, as he sometimes does, but is alarmed to see her deflate by his side.

"No. I tried to be out, but they don't...they think it's a phase or some shit. I don't know."

She shrugs, and Jayce is confused and out of his element. It's usually the other way around. He comes to Vi moping and she puts his pieces back together. Dealing with emotions is not his strongest suit, but he can try. That's the least he can do.

"Hey, it'll work out. And if we can't find anyone, we can go together."

She snorts, and Jayce is relieved to see her smile again. "Yeah, sure. As if we need any more rumors about us dating. They hurt my chances with the babes, you know?"

"Tragic," she nods, and Jayce is glad to have her. For some reason, even though he's popular, people seem to...not want to talk to him much. Viktor's reaction when he tried to speak to him comes to mind. It's worrisome. "Hey, Vi. What do you know about that Viktor guy?"

"The one who won the Science Fair?" Jayce grumbles and she laughs but doesn't insist. "Not much. He doesn't like you. Doesn't talk much. Kind of a goth vibe with all the black clothes, but who knows. Why? You like him?"

She wiggles her eyebrows and Jayce slaps his hand over her mouth to hush her. No. Absurd. Never. Viktor is not the kind of guy he'll ever be into, and he sucks anyway.

"No. Shut up. I just tried to talk to him the other day, about his project, and he was super rude and I don't know why."

"It's because you're an arrogant dick," she deadpans, muffled by his hand, and Jayce isn't even offended.

"Maybe. It's not as if I can't be one, have you seen me?" he lets her go and gestures at himself, and Vi shoves him off the bed.

"Out of my house. Get out of here. I want your ass out of my space," she kicks him softly, and Jayce laughs as he stands and leaves the room flipping her off.

-x-

"I wish I could be like Jayce."

"Jayce is an asshole."

"What bullshit is Jayce going to pull today."

"Christine told me that Jayce once snogged her and Laura Davis the same day."

"Isn't Jayce just dreamy?"

"Jayce's been going out with Vi since junior year."

"I don't want to anger Jayce. Who knows what he'd do."

"Jayce helps at the local shelter every single day. Rob saw him."

This is Viktor's high school experience every single day.

Jayce this, Jayce that, Jayce Jayce Jayce Jayce Jayce.

Jayce in class, Jayce around the halls, Jayce's plastered all over the walls.

Jayce fans, Jayce haters, Jayce mythomaniacs.

Jayce friends?

One to his knowledge, not that he cares.

Viktor enters the cafeteria and the first thing he hears is Jayce's voice, loud and clear.

And sure enough, there he is. Letterman jacket and all, sitting with the head cheerleader and talking as if there is nobody else in the room. Viktor hates him, but he hates himself even more for staring.

The girl sitting with Jayce, Vi he thinks, catches him looking and waves with a smile and Viktor feels like pointing at himself and asking if she's one hundred percent sure, absolutely certain, that she wants to be seen establishing contact with the guy who everyone still calls New Kid. If they have to call him anything at all.

She keeps waving.

What is he supposed to do.

He raises a hand and wiggles his fingers, fully aware of how awkward he looks but what other options does he have? Approach their table and talk? To them?

Not in a million years, thank you.

Viktor stares in wonder as Vi smiles at him and elbows Jayce in the ribs. Hard. Then points his way, and Jayce kind of waves? At him? Too? Kinda. A little.

Thinking about it later he'd say that it was a tactical withdrawal. That he did not run away, no siree. He left the cafeteria because he wasn't that hungry to begin with, he was sick to bastard death of everyone waxing poetic about Jayce, and he wanted nothing to do with him. That'd be his reasoning, and he'd be pretty content with it too.

Right there and then, he feels like he's about to puke. Insecure and small, angry at himself and angry at Jayce for existing and making him feel in the spotlight. So he leaves, before it gets worse and he has to deal with the situation any longer and decide whether or not to wave back.

It turns out to be a mistake, as he discovers the next day when he finds Jayce hanging by his locker staring down at his phone.

He's wearing his letterman jacket again and he looks up when he hears Viktor approaching, regretting it almost instantly when Jayce beams at him as if they've been friends since freshman year.

"Viktor, my man!" if he says my main man next, Viktor is going to punch him. "My main man!"

Right.

Viktor punches his arm. Jayce doesn't even flinch and yes, it could've been more effective but he feels slightly less frustrated with the world at large. A little.

"What do you want."

"I..." Jayce hesitates, and it's surprising enough for Viktor to stop trying to open his locker and look at him. He's staring down at the floor, and Viktor is. Well. Viktor is intrigued, for lack of a better word. "Believe it or not, not many people here are willing to talk about robotics."

Jayce looks back up at him, sheepish, and Viktor is horrified to realize that he feels sympathy for him. Oh, the horror. The absolute dread.

"Cool. I guess. Or...uncool? Why do I care about this, exactly?"

He opens his locker more forcefully than necessary and Jayce flinches. "I figured you'd...be? Interested? In talking about robotics?"

Viktor hangs his head and takes a very deep breath. Slowly.

He would like everyone around him to get the message he tries to project with how he presents himself quickly. The message being leave me the fuck alone, thank you very much. Honestly. He dresses in all black, he's a walking loner teen trope. Awkward and socially inept, that's what he is.

Why must the most popular kid in school (trademark) be obsessed with talking to him. He'd love to crack that, but also to forget about it and go on with his life without ever thinking about it again.

"Listen, Jayce," he starts, and tries to be as clear as he can. Even if he has to be brutal about it. "I do like to talk about robotics, I just...don't want to do so...with you?"

He glances Jayce's way checking for a reaction and finds his face...oddly blank. Worrying. Better than anger, better than tears. But weird.

"Why?" Jayce's voice is low, strained. Viktor grimaces.

"Why should I?"

"Please," Jayce says, and it sounds more or less like pooleese and Viktor quirks an eyebrow and closes his locker to stare at him as a grin spreads across his face. "Aren't you supposed to be like super smart or something? What's up with the silly questions? Of course you'd want to talk to me, why wouldn't you?"

This conversation is going in circles and Viktor's head is starting to hurt. Though he dreads to admit that Jayce's arrogance is sort of funny, in an awful kind of way.

Viktor scoffs and tries to shove Jayce away. With little to no success. "I'm afraid of your ego getting big enough to suffocate us both, that's why."

Jayce, wonder of wonders, snorts. Viktor stares at him trying to mask his disbelief, cover it with disdain or aloofness. Whichever gets Jayce to leave. Judging by how Jayce's grin grows, he's failed. Quite spectacularly, too.

"I bet you love the Borg."

"Of course I do," he bites his tongue, hard, because he has answered before he has thought about it and he wants to kick Jayce's look of contempt out of his smug ass face. "Why am I still talking to you."

Jayce leans across his locker, arms crossed, and Viktor bristles and takes a step back. Too close. Much too close. No thanks.

"Why shouldn't you?"

Viktor turns on his heel and leaves Jayce right where he is.

-x-

It's been a week and Jayce might still not be over it.

At all.

"He likes the Borg."

"So you've said. Twenty times in the last five minutes."

"He does not like me."

Vi stops fiddling with her phone and looks at him over the rim of her sunglasses. "Tell me something I don't know."

Jayce sneers. "The new girl is coming this way and she looks ready to kill a man, or you, or both before fifth period starts. So am gonna bail and see if I can find Viktor somewhere."

He jumps off the bleachers and takes a second to enjoy Vi's panic as the girl marches her way before he takes off. He's a man on a mission. On one that he is not one hundred percent sure why he took, if he's to be completely honest with himself.

Luckily for him, Viktor is so easy to spot that he doesn't have enough time to reflect on that before he finds him.

He's sitting with a book on the stairs to the main building's entrance, alone. His hair is an absolute mess and Jayce should tell him that black is not the only color available at stores, but he doesn't think it would be welcomed advice.

It's not as if it's a bad color on him. The whole broody teen aesthetic fits the sharp features like a glove.

Jayce struts his way as casually as he knows how, which isn't very casually at all, and Viktor is digging a hole through his skull with his eyes by the time he reaches the steps he's sitting on.

"What is it now?" he asks, before he even has a chance to say hello, and Jayce shrugs and picks at the sleeves of his jacket. Curiosity, he guesses. A little bit of pettiness.

"Just wanted to talk."

Viktor smiles, but it's cold as steel. "Well I don't. So that's settled. Bye."

"About the ethical and aesthetic implications of performing body modifications when not needed," Jayce says, and Viktor frowns at him and heaves a sigh.

"Define body modifications," Viktor spits. Jayce sits by him. He'll enjoy this victory while he can.

"Not piercings or tats or that shit, I mean prosthetics. Legs, arms. That kind of stuff," Viktor closes his book and taps his finger on the cover as Jayce speaks. "We are over this debate when they are needed. In my opinion, at least. But how do we judge it when someone who doesn't need them decides to like...better themself or something and gets them done?"

He's been more eloquent other times, he'll admit that, but Viktor's eyes are intense on his and he's been paying attention. Jayce doesn't know why he wants that as much as he does. Maybe it's a matter of pride. Nobody is allowed to ignore him.

Maybe it's a matter of having someone, anyone, to talk to about these things.

"Aesthetically speaking, it'd be an statement. They do it because they can do it, and their reasons for it are inane. If we are to discuss the aesthetics, that's as far as we can go. Ethically, I don't think we are the right people to discuss these matters."

Jayce hums. "I guess you are right."

"I do think that media questioning whether or not cyborgs or, say, augmented human beings are still human is boring. The prosthetic I built is proof that those so called cyborgs are possible in the world we live in. We either go full posthumanist, which makes the question meaningless, or stop being fucking assholes. Then again, this is not my topic to discuss."

Viktor's voice, which has raised through his speech, dims and dies by the end of it and he avoids Jayce's eyes as if he's done something wrong. Jayce finds himself dumbstruck, unable to come up with an answer.

He's going to drop on his knees and cry at Viktor's feet because this is the kind of conversation he's been longing to have for years but nobody thinks a jock has substance. No matter how many Science Fair prizes he might have won. His dad could've been making those, for all anyone knows.

"I've been thinking about that, too. Not that exactly. But progress, you know? How we...advance. And go on. And there's no way to stop that, but sometimes it's dizzying. I love it, we are just gonna need help catching up with ourselves with how fast we are going."

Viktor snorts. "You mean like Moore's Law?"

"Yeah, something like that. Though that's pretty much dead with how tiny chips are now. I meant that applied to technology at large. Take the super-capacitator I built, for instance. With how phones are produced nowadays, wouldn't a device meant to make them charge faster be useful?"

"It would. Though I do find that to be a little too distanced from humanity, and paradoxically too emotional at the same time," Viktor answers, and Jayce is...Jayce is dying. Maybe even literally.

"It's emotional because I care. I'm involved in it and I sound like I am. Of course it's emotional. How couldn't it be?"

Viktor shrugs. Jayce is having a very hard time deciphering his expression. He looks tired.

"Emotions are messy. Why are you so set on talking to me, anyway? Useless to ask now that you have gotten what you wanted but might as well," Jayce recognizes a change of topic when he sees one, but he doesn't comment. He chooses to be honest instead, because what could go wrong.

"You seemed to be the only person at school who didn't like me."

By the way Viktor snorts, dry and humorless, and looks at him with what feels a lot like actual pity in his eyes, everything could go wrong.

"Are you telling me that you're so self absorbed that you haven't noticed? Me ignoring you is pretty mild compared to what others are doing, Jayce."

He's panicking, but Viktor doesn't need to know. The way Jayce's world is falling around him because of his words is none of his business. At all. So he tries, hard as he might, to hold on and smile, fake as it may be. He's handsome, athletic, smart. It's only natural that he's popular. He's avoided pulling awful stunts. People...can't hate him.

It doesn't make sense.

"Can't help it if they're jealous of my natural charm," if Viktor has noticed the tremor in his voice, he doesn't comment. He hums, and hits his arm lightly with the book, but doesn't say anything else, and leaves Jayce sitting on the steps feeling like the ground is shaking beneath his feet.

-x-

"I just can't stand him."

"God, he's so...overbearing."

"His ego is the size of the building."

"I've heard he got Brian expelled because he didn't let him copy his homework."

"His dad's loaded and that's about everything worthy about him."

"I hate him."

I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him.

Turns out every piece of media Jayce has ever watched about teen life is right and being popular is a double edged sword, and he wasn't just an exception to the rule.

He didn't get lucky because he's got the looks and the charm. He's just been so busy with being enamored with himself and the idea of being a teen idol since freshman year that he hasn't noticed that half the student body fucking hates him, and that most don't even do it for legit reasons.

Even though some of them do.

They are done with his face being everywhere, or his attitude, or his brashness. That, Jayce can understand. With that, he can live.

Others hate him because of rumors, or because he's somehow managed to interfere in their lives without wanting to.

Jimmy Burton's girlfriend left him when they were in junior year because she had a crush on Jayce, then refused to get back with him when Jayce turned her down and blamed Jimmy for it and somehow it's Jayce's fault. Arabella Williams waved at him once when they were in the hall during sophomore year and Jayce didn't wave back, mostly because he doesn't have eyes in his ass, and it's been eating at her since then.

And so on and so forth.

All in all, he was happier when he was a self absorbed prick who didn't pay attention to his whereabouts and didn't know that people hated him. His life was better that way.

He tells Vi at lunch and she laughs in his face.

"I thought that you were being mature about it, but you didn't even know."

Jayce looks around but no one seems to be paying attention to them. For now. "Yeah. Keep your voice down, alright? I just. I don't know, Vi. I've been busy?"

"Having your head inside your ass, yeah," she's crude as fuck, but it's okay. It's fine. It's not as if everything he's thought to be true for the last four years has been a lie. At all. It's totally chill.

He doesn't want to keep talking about this, all of a sudden.

"What did that girl want, yesterday?"

Vi quirks an eyebrow at him and Jayce prays for her to let him off the hook, just once. It won't hurt her and it'll make him have at least five minutes more to digest this situation he's in. Win/win, really.

"I'm gonna let you get away with it today, but don't count on it again," she says, flicking his forehead, and Jayce smiles. "Her name's Caitlyn and f y i, she thinks I'm hot. Wants to take me to prom."

"You are kidding. There's still like a month till prom. I should know, I'm in charge of it."

"Yeah, well. She's in a hurry. Didn't want you to snatch me up with your debonair claws or some shit," Vi sneers. "It's nice, you know? For someone to believe me when I say I'm gay. For a change. You fuck my reputation up real bad, Jaycerino."

He leans over the table, as close to her as he can get, and Vi pushes him back hard enough for him to fall back on his chair. But it's good. It's great. She's laughing, Jayce is laughing, life seems nicer when Vi is happy and glowing as she is now. No matter what people, apparently, think about him; he does care about his friends a lot. Even if he only has one, and that one spends twenty hours a day out of twenty four laughing at him.

"Hey, I did scram when she marched your way, didn't I?" she scoffs, which is never a good sign.

"Sure. Only 'cause you thought that she was out for blood and you wanted to chase that new kid around. Viktor, wasn't it? Still sore about his win?"

"Oh no, I have bigger things to be sore about right now, like the fact that half the student body hates me apparently."

Jayce knows that there's someone behind him halfway through that sentence but it's too late to stop and he doesn't want to anyway. No regrets when he's telling the truth.

"Are you always so over dramatic?" Viktor asks, and yes some regrets maybe.

"Viktor, my boy! He can be way more dramatic, this is nothing by his standards," Vi is the worst kind of traitor to ever exist, but Jayce will go easy on her. She's trying to do him a solid, he knows. She thinks that he wants to befriend Viktor, when it's kind of more complicated than that. He...wants to...talk to him about slightly philosophical robotics related stuff?

Or something like that.

"I see," Jayce can't see Viktor's face, but he can feel the smirk deep within his soul. "It's not that bad. Some of them do want to be your friends."

Pity, that's just what he needs. He reaches back, doing his very best to pretend that his ego isn't shattered, and grabs Viktor's hand when he finds it.

"Do you want to be my friend?" Jayce says, having the feeling that he's only half joking and not caring for a change, and looks back at Viktor's face upside down. He seems to be scowling, but it's hard to know from down there.

"Do you?" Viktor tearing his hand away as if burned doesn't hurt, not exactly, but it does sting. In this moment of odd weakness and vulnerability of his, Jayce finds himself...lacking. Many things. And Vi is great, but he can't only rely on her. It's been four years of them against all odds but what about college?

And he's been silent for way too long.

"Could do with a little bit of black in my life to counter all the pink, I guess," Vi snorts, and Jayce sticks his tongue out at her just to be a brat.

"He's like a bucket full of black," she says, nose scrunched, then looks apologetically at Viktor with a shrugs. "No offense."

Viktor laughs, dry and airy. "Non taken. As long as you take the hair gel away from this one."

Jayce stays silent as Vi and Viktor laugh at him and feels like he might just have made the biggest mistake of his life.

-x-

Prom is looming over the horizon, his acceptance later came in March but no scholarships have been offered so far, and he has the sickening feeling that during last week he is being Jayce and Vi's charity project for their last year of high school.

It's...a cliché, really. Take the new, socially isolated, student and make them popular. He can list more than ten movies with that as a major plot point. It's either that or the new kid ends up with their hands covered in blood. Or both. Which he does not want, thank you.

Some things are missing, sure. They haven't taken him shopping, and they haven't tried to change his ways. Yet. They have invited him to a party, though. That very same night, two hours from Viktor having the impulse to bail. Just...call it quits. They wouldn't mind, would they? It's not as if Viktor is their best friend or anything. He's just this odd kid who can talk science to Jayce and laugh at him with Vi. That's it, nothing else. They'll have fun without him.

His phone rings and he almost throws it against the wall when he sees Jayce's name displayed on the screen.

"Yo Viktor," calling is so outdated it almost fits Jayce, who has to stand out in everything he does, to do that instead of texting. "Long story short, Vi dumped me 'cause she's got a hot date or something. You still up for tonight?"

Well that's not cool. If he bails on Jayce now he's going to feel guilty and bad and that sucks.

Shit.

"I..." he hesitates. Is he, really, up for tonight? Viktor's not sure. It's either risking it or having to face feeling like shit for leaving Jayce alone. Absurd as that thought is, being that he's going to a party. Was his life this complicated before he got tangled in this mess of a friendship? "Yeah. Yes. I'm still in."

"Alright. Not liking that pause, but okay. You chill?"

No, never.

"Yes. I'm chill. Don't sweat it."

He hangs up before Jayce can keep on asking, and ends up being late to the party only because he spends too much in front of the mirror caring about things that never mattered before. Is his hair okay? Is wearing too much black possible? Does he look as unapproachable as he feels? Should he tone down the leave me alone vibes he tries to project?

It's an exercise in frustration and futility that makes him feel stupid and irritated, and by the time he gets to Elijah Brooks' house he's tired and not exactly ready to interact with people. Looking around and only seeing people he vaguely recalls from some classes or the halls, or people who have laughed at him, doesn't help.

Where the fuck is Jayce fucking Sawyer.

Viktor shuffles around the house, bumping into people as he goes, looking around. They wave at him. Some say hello. He doesn't think anybody there knows his name. He turns around a corner, looking over his shoulder, and bumps into a guy he has seen around the halls but's never met. He steadies him, a hand on his shoulder and the other around a plastic cup.

"Hey, you okay?" Viktor nods, and shrugs his shoulder. The guy drops his hand and frowns. "Viktor, right? You looking for someone?"

He has to shout over the music, and it isn't helping with the knot twisting in his stomach. Viktor is surprised, though, to see that he does know how he's called.

"Yes. Have you seen Jayce?"

"Jayce Sawyer? Yeah. Go back to the front door, he's in the backyard."

"Thanks."

The guy finger guns and dances away. Viktor looks down at himself and, sure enough, he hasn't melted. He's right there, in one piece, alive. After a very awkward but successful interaction with an stranger. Maybe he will survive the party, after all.

He makes his way to the backyard, and Jayce's voice booms from the deck chair he's laying on by the pool.

"Viktor! You finally made it," Viktor flinches, but hey. If Jayce gets annoying he can try to throw him in the pool. Not many people around, could get away with it with little to no witnesses. "Where were you?"

He walks Jayce's way, and sits on the edge of the deck chair. He can definitely try to throw him in the pool. If he uses the chair he could even succeed. "Inside. Why the hell are you out here?"

"Too many people inside. It's nicer out."

"Don't you like being with people? Why come to a party if you don't?"

Jayce shrugs and avoids his eyes, which is very odd and makes Viktor lean closer to see him better in the dark and try and make sense of his expression.

"Vi's the party animal, I'm a tag along," try as he might he can't see him, and his voice isn't giving him any clues as to what he's thinking. "She threatened me with murder if I, quote unquote, denied you the once-in-a-lifetime experience of a high school party."

The more he knows Jayce, the more his mental image of him changes. It isn't completely destroyed, because he was right about some things. But he is not...what he expected him to be. He's like a subversion of a trope, an intellectual jock with feelings who languishes by the pool during parties all by himself. It's confusing, but it'd be one hell of a movie protag.

Viktor can't help it, he laughs. It's too much for even him to keep on trying to look broody.

"Do you hear yourself when you speak?"

"Hey, I'm wounded. Here I am, being sincere and open with you, and you laugh at me."

He looks down at Jayce, at what he can make out in the dark, and what he sees -the person he knows, someone who can talk about the complexities of circuitry for hours- is so far removed from the guy who strut into a classroom and winked at the teacher that he's having trouble piecing the whole picture together.

"I don't even know how you ended up being so popular with how weird you are."

"Natural charm. I'm handsome, I'm smart, I have great hair. Not my fault, I didn't even try," Jayce flashes a smile up at him and Viktor puts his hand on his face.

"Don't ruin it, please," he deadpans, and makes a face when Jayce licks his hand because he's a gross asshole. "Too much to ask from you, I guess."

Viktor cleans his hand on Jayce shirt as Jayce cackles away, and is only a tiny bit angry at himself for smiling.

-x-

"How was your date?"

"Very nice. We had milkshake and played baseball, she smooched me under the moon. I texted her like ten sparkly heart emojis and she texted a winking emoji back. So far, so good. Why are you still using your phone to call instead of texting, like people younger than thirty do?"

"Because you hate it," Vi hangs up on him. Jayce deserved that. He calls again and she keeps him waiting but picks up eventually. "Anyway. Emergency."

She whistles, the noise piercing Jayce's ear, and he deserved that too. "Code?"

"Code deep dark fucking red. Get your ass to my house asap or face mopey Jayce for years."

She hangs up again, and Jayce stares at his room's door from the bed.

Saturday, the morning after the party. It went great and Jayce is a mess.

More of a mess than usual, lately, with all his life shifting and turning and making him think about himself.

Vi stumbles through the door, looking frantic, and Jayce waves weakly from the bed.

"What happened?"

Better get this off his chest as soon as he can.

"I like him."

"Who?"

"Viktor."

"What? Since when? How did this happen?" she sits by his side on the bed, boots on the comforter and all.

"Since last night, is my best guess. He just. I was down, you know? How I get sometimes at parties and stuff. And he was there and we talked, and he was teasing me and he smiled and he was framed by the stars and the fucking moon and shit and I just. I don't know. I looked at him and he was...right there."

"You sure this isn't you being lonely and him being the only dude who talks to you?"

Jayce scowls. "Fucking rude. I'm in the football team and in the student council, a lot of dudes talk to me. I'm crushing hard on him because he knows how to play that stupid Star Trek 3D chess and his smile made me want to cry."

"Oh boy, you've got it bad."

"Yeah, that's my point," she drops her head on her shoulder and pats his leg. It's comforting, if only a little. He'll take it. "This sucks. I gotta start working on prom night, and college is coming, and you're going so far away, and a crush is the last thing I need right now."

"Shut your trap. No matter how far I go, you'll always call me like a fucking grandpa."

Jayce doesn't remember having fallen asleep when he wakes up but Vi's still there, popping a gum bubble and looking down at her phone with a smile.

"Caitlyn?"

"Yeah," her fingers fly over the screen for a second, and then she locks the phone and turns to him. "You feeling better?"

"Kind of? A lot of stuff piled up," he stretches and Vi rolls over and jumps out of the bed. "Thanks for coming. Needed to talk."

"Whenever, dude. Just don't let it get bad, okay? You suck at emotions," she punches his arm, softly, and runs to the door. Jayce flops on the bed with his arms open staring at the ceiling, listening as Vi yells TALK TO HIM from the stairs.

-x-

Jayce is acting weird and Viktor will blame it on the Monday blues and stop thinking about it. He's going to ignore that Jayce isn't by his locker when Physics C is over. He's going to pretend that he isn't noticing the way Jayce is being much less tactile today. He will absolutely not comment on the bags under Jayce's eyes. Everything is normal. Going as expected. Perfectly fine.

He cracks at six in the evening, when he gets news of yet another scholarship denied and he can't deal with the mess any longer.

"Viktor? You never call. Is everything alright?"

No. Nothing is alright. His parents expect too much even if they won't stop fucking moving, he expects too much no matter how hard he knows he tries, Jayce is being distant, and he's starting to care about being alone. Everything is wrong. Everything fucking sucks.

"I don't know if I can pay for college, I don't know if I'm smart enough for college, you weren't like you at all today and I don't know if anything is alright, no idea at all," there's silence on the other end of the line, and Viktor takes a deep breath and sits on his desk. He shouldn't just...dump all his problems on Jayce. He wasn't okay today. It isn't right. "Sorry. Forget it. I'll just try to stop thinking about all of this and I'll see you around, I suppose, talk to you tom..."

"Viktor," Jayce cuts him off, and Viktor runs a hand through his hair and waits. "It's fine. I'm going through some stuff too and I let it get at me today. We are okay, don't worry about that. You can talk to me about things unrelated to technology or philosophy or nerd shit."

Viktor laughs despite himself. "We couldn't end the year without some teenage drama."

"This hardly counts as drama. Finding out that your popular boy status implies hatred, that is drama. A meltdown over the phone is regular friend stuff. Ask Vi, I think she prints my crytypes."

"They idolize you too, stop ignoring that. Is it really bothering you that much?"

"Yes and no. I also have to deal with prom, which sucks 'cause I don't even want to go. Vi has a date already, nobody asked me out, every teen movie warned me about it. I don't know, it's a silly thing to worry about but it's...being on my mind a lot."

"You are the student council president, it's one of the things you have to do. Vi isn't helping?"

Jayce sighs, and Viktor feels the very strange impulse of patting his back. "She can't. Yearbook committee, her hands are full already. I also have this game next week. Last of the season, and the year, and my high school career actually."

"Sounds big."

"You know what? I...should care more about it than I do. I like football, but I don't like it as much as the rest of the team. I feel guilty about that, even if I do give it my all when I play. I don't know, it's a mess. You'll come, though, right?"

Viktor wasn't planning to. He knew about the match, knew that Jayce was going to play and that Vi was going to cheer, but thought that it was okay for him to stay home and do his own thing or go out alone or whatever. Those things he used to do before he had friends. But if Jayce wants him to go, he'll do it.

The idea of a crowded bleacher makes him cringe, but he will go.

"Yes, sure. I'll be there."

"Cool. Cool. That's...that's great. I'll see you there, then. And tomorrow. Talk to you then, okay?"

"Okay," Jayce hangs up and Viktor lets his hand drop and looks down at his phone, unsure of what to do next.

Having to move so much during his childhood, it's always been easier to merge into the background and get ignored than making friends. He suffered less forgetting and getting forgotten as if he had never been there in the first place. But now, with Vi and Jayce, things feel different and they are scary. Viktor is starting to care about them, and his parents won't up and leave when the school year is so close to ending but fear is hard to control.

There's a certain level of safety in being alone that he misses and dreads at the same time now that he doesn't feel as lonely anymore. There's also the ever present anxiety that comes with the possibility of them realizing that he wasn't that great to begin with and leaving him. It's easy enough to manage on a good day, but bad days are hard to deal with. Friendship had grown alien to him as the years passed. He has to get used to it again.

He can do that.

Right?

-x-

Jayce looks ridiculous in football gear, but Viktor thinks that everyone looks ridiculous in football gear. He tells Jayce, right before he has to march to the locker room for the pre-game pep talk, and Jayce flips him the bird as he walks backwards and almost trips climbing down the bleachers.

"You could ask him out," Viktor jumps out of his skin and Vi sits by his side with a smirk. "If that's what you want."

He glares at her, but it only makes the smirk grow. "What makes you think that I want to do that? And shouldn't you be down there with the rest of the cheerleaders?"

"Chill, it's okay. Still got ten minutes till I gotta get down there," she hooks an arm over his shoulders, and Viktor wants to leave but this is the friend he's managed to make and this is one of the horrors that come with her. "I don't know. You were making goo goo eyes at him, figured you might have a teeny tiny crush on our good old friend the Jaycer."

Viktor hopes he doesn't look as mortified as he feels. "I'm...I don't. Football gear is ridiculous, that's all. He is the most popular guy in school, and not interested."

Vi quirks an eyebrow. Viktor fears for his life. "Sound like excuses to me. But sure, you do you. If you say that you don't have a crush on him, I have to believe that. If you want my help with him, though, am glad to lend you a hand. Gotta skedaddle, see you in a bit."

After that, Viktor tries to pay attention to the match. He really does. But not knowing the first thing about football isn't helping with the fact that he can't stop thinking about what Vi said. He can't have a crush on Jayce, and he can't have one without noticing. Right? It's just. Not possible.

The guy on his left bumps him with his shoulder and Viktor doesn't even notice.

Jayce is everything he says he is, but in ways that Viktor didn't expect. He's charming, sometimes even when he's being and arrogant brat. He's handsome, something that Viktor admitted to himself since day one, but there's something about him when nobody's looking that Viktor's seen once in a while and that he can't really put down into words. He's smart, unexpectedly so. He's also irritating, obtuse, bad at feelings and self-absorbed.

Someone drops popcorn on him and Viktor doesn't care.

There's so much to unpack about the matter of whether or not he has a crush on Jayce that he doesn't even know where to begin. They've only been friends for a few weeks, and Viktor is. Lost. Did Vi's words start this? Is he questioning his own feelings because Jayce is the only guy who's on good terms with him?

Their team scores. Viktor looks for Jayce on the field and Jayce waves at him and Vi.

It's impossible anyway. Vi might be dating Caitlyn, but Jayce is supposed to go to college and marry a beautiful girl and have 2.5 children, a golden retriever and a house with a pool.

He remembers how Jayce sounded laughing on the deck chair by the pool, so carefree and happy, and his stomach drops.

Viktor spends the rest of the game trying to focus but failing, having to deal with a journey of self discovery ended in tragedy and the prospect of a very smug Vi in his future. By the time it's over, he only knows that they've won and that he's fucked.

Vi's the first to run up to where he's sitting, fresh out of the shower and beaming. "Viktorino! We won!"

"I know."

"You don't look like it."

"You were right."

"I usually am, but what are we talking about?"

She lays on the bench with her head on his lap and Viktor stares off into the distance, dodging her eyes.

"Jayce."

"Oh."

"Yes."

"Just ask him out."

"I can't."

"I'll help you, it's easy. You walk to him, you ask him to go catch a movie with you, and then you pick him up, and then you watch a movie, and then you smooch him."

He smacks her forehead and she swats at his hand. "It's not that easy, I'm not exactly a dreamboat and he's coming this way act casual."

"Good game, Jayceton," Jayce beams, and it's awful. Viktor wants to slap him and then himself.

"Our last hurrah," he sits by Viktor's side, much too close for comfort right then when Viktor is having the worst kind of revelation. "You were great out there too, Vi."

"When am I not," she stretches and straightens, sitting by Viktor's other side. "Gotta ditch you, though. You are my favorite boys, but Caitlyn's waiting."

Viktor watches her go and hates her a little for trying to help him. He doesn't doubt that she does have a date, late as it might be by his standards, but leaving him alone now with Jayce is not cool.

At all.

Jayce sighs, and Viktor turns to observe his profile under the harsh lights of the field. He's smiling, easy and relaxed.

"I can't believe that this is going to be over in like...two months?" Jayce says, something sad in his voice tugging at Viktor's heartstrings, and turns to look at Viktor himself. "Wish we had met sooner, too. With college and all...I know we'll keep in touch, but it won't be the same and it feels like we didn't have enough time."

Viktor can feel Jayce's breath on his face.

"I have a feeling we would have hated each other for four years," he says, dry, and Jayce laughs. "It feels easier this way. We didn't know enough about each other to...not become friends?"

Jayce leans on him and he's solid and warm.

"Yeah. Still funny to picture you as a freshman, though. Full on broody mysterious look back then too?"

"No. I did wear whatever my mom got for me back then. Things changed after we started moving. Where you always like this?"

Jayce snorts and pinches his arm. "Like what? Glorious?"

"An insufferable jock," Viktor retorts, nudging Jayce's side with his shoulder, and Jayce lets more of his weight fall on him. "You can try to suffocate me but it will still be true."

"Shut up. And yes, I think I was always...like this. I'm good at looking like I'm good at people, actually very bad at people and at myself, and pretty amazing at pretending that I know what I'm doing. Didn't plan on becoming a jock, though, that kind of just happened."

Viktor takes a deep breath, leaning his own weight against Jayce. People are leaving the field, climbing down the bleachers, chattering away and ignoring them. Jayce feels real and close, and Viktor is drowning in it.

"I hate how much I'm going to miss your pompous ass."

Jayce's laugh rumbles through Viktor's chest.

"God. Yes. Same."

-x-

"And you didn't fucking kiss him?" Vi throws a pillow at him and Jayce doesn't even try to dodge. He deserves it, he's an idiot. "He tells you that he's going to miss you looking into the horizon and you stay there and do nothing."

"No, of course I didn't. He was having an open and vulnerable moment with me, that would have been nasty."

Vi grabs another pillow and screams into it.

"I cannot believe this sense of honor you've grown in like a week."

Jayce starts pacing around his room for lack of a better thing to do, and dodges the other Pillow that Vi throws his way.

"Vi, please. It's hard enough as it is, it was not right," she heaves a sigh and jumps off the bed, hopefully leaving the pillows alone.

"Okay. Alright. Fine. Do it your way, Jayce, but it's going to take forever and a bit. Why don't you talk to him?"

"He is very hard to read," Vi quirks an eyebrow. "Okay, fine. He isn't, but he is hard to follow when emotions are in the mix and I don't know if he's straight and he complains a lot about me being overbearing and I'm pretty sure that he has his eyes on that girl from Chem?"

"Oh my God," she kicks his shin, not hard enough to hurt but he gets the message. "Who are you and what have you done with Jayce?"

"I don't know. I'm insecure on the inside, whatever."

"Don't you lie to me, that's a lie. You know that you are pretty, it's your mouth that's the problem," Jayce pouts, but she hushes him. "You care, I get that. You don't wanna fuck up, but is it really worth the misery?"

No idea.

He only has a couple of months left with them. It's either talking to Viktor and risking those months being awkward or Viktorless, or doing nothing and letting his crush die. There's no good option. Viktor being into him is almost impossible as far as he knows, no matter how pretty he is.

It's a mess.

He hates it.

His phone buzzes and of course it's Christine asking if he's gonna get to the student council meeting or not.

"Vi, listen. I've got a meeting about fucking prom now. We'll...talk about this. Later. I'll do something. I don't know what yet, but I will."

She glares at him, arms crossed. "I sure hope you do."

He does, too.

-x-

Viktor leaves his pen on his desk and looks down at his notebook with satisfaction. It's full of complex diagrams that Jayce gets but that he's amazed that Vitkor knows at all, and when Jayce glances at him he finds his eyes already on him.

"What do you think about that?" he asks, a smile softening his sharp features. "This scholarship is easy come easy go, looks high level enough for you?"

Jayce grabs the notebook and scans the diagrams. He can recognize the skeleton for a full on robotic construction, and notes about the possible development of an AI. Impressive.

"It is. And if it's high level enough for me, it should be for anyone."

"So humble," says Viktor, with a smirk, and Jayce leaves the notebook where it was and flips him the bird. "How's prom going?"

Jayce grimaces. "Almost done, thankfully. Only last minute things left."

"It'll be over by Sunday. You going?"

"Don't think so, didn't get asked to," he laughs, and Viktor makes a face but doesn't further comment. "It's fine. I don't really want to go. Nothing good can come out of prom."

Viktor's hair is a mess and Jayce wants to run his fingers through it.

Focus.

"You have very strong opinions against prom for a prom king," Viktor turns on his chair and smiles, and Jayce snorts.

"We've been warned against it, I'm just being cautious," he reasons, and Viktor's awful dry laugh makes him feel like screaming. "Are you going?"

Viktor shrugs. "I don't think so. Nobody asked me to go with them, and it will be too crowded."

"Do you want to go with me?" Jayce says, and immediately wants to kick himself in the teeth for lacking impulse control and self-preservation.

Viktor blinks at him, stunned. "You want to go with me."

"Yes," he answers, before he chickens out, and Viktor frowns.

"Why?"

Really? Is that honestly going to be his reaction to Jayce being a dumbass and asking him to prom? Jayce laughs, surprised, caught out of his element. He's not good at this. He sucks. Why did he do this.

"Why not," it's a good an answer as any. But it is...lacking. "We could have fun."

"Okay. Fine. Pick you up at seven?" Viktor says, voice steady and fierce eyes set on Jayce's, and Jayce can feel his heart trying to beat its way out of his chest.

"Sure."

-x-

Viktor calls him the day before prom, panicking, and Jayce almost starts begging him not to ditch him right there on the spot before Viktor tells him that he doesn't own a single suit.

"Not one. Suit jackets, sure. Full suits? No," Viktor sighs, Jayce wills his own breathing to settle after almost going into full panic mode himself. "Are jeans fine? Why do I care so much about this?"

Jayce smiles and leaves his cup of coffee on the kitchen counter. "Relax. Jeans are fine, I'll wear jeans too. I'll wear my fucking letterman jacket if it makes you feel any better."

"It would, actually. I mean, if you don't care. You must have suits, you are the jock of the century."

"One. Wore it to my aunt's wedding," not having to wear it again is a relief. It was uncomfortable and made Jayce feel like he was playing dress up. "I'll go jock-casual, you can do formal-goth."

Viktor's amused snort makes him almost drop his phone. "Sure. It'll be interesting. See you tomorrow."

He hangs up on Jayce and he stares right there, in the kitchen, looking down at his coffee unable to wipe the grin off his face.

-x-

Formal-goth does sound like a bad joke, but he looks at himself in the mirror and has to admit that it's not half bad. Black, smart enough to pass as proper prom attire but casual enough to be comfortable. Viktor checks himself one last time, takes a deep fortifying breath, and leaves his house to pick Jayce up.

He's not sure what Jayce's deal is. If this is a pity date, he might just be sad enough to accept it. If it's a platonic deal, he'll go along with it and bury his feelings for Jayce deep down inside himself where they belong. Those are the only two options he's considered, the only ones that feel reasonable and possible.

Viktor scowls at his hands, trembling on the steering wheel, as he waits for Jayce to get in the car. It's fine. He's going to be okay. It's not as if Jayce is going to declare him prom king and drop a bucket full of pig blood of his head. No serial killers on the loose. No zombies. Vi and Jayce aren't prone to popular kids high school drama.

It will be okay.

Jayce climbs into the car and Viktor looks at him, smiling at Viktor with his letterman jacket on, and it won't be okay. Viktor can feel his eyes on him, and he shifts in his seat.

"Cool look," he says, smirking, and Viktor groans and starts driving to avoid spilling his guts in his car. "Vi doesn't know we're going. She's gonna yell at us, you've been warned."

Vi does yell at them when they get to the high school gym. She hits Jayce, too, and Viktor winces because that did sound like it hurt.

"You assholes could have at least told me that we were doing casual and I wouldn't have even tried to get my ass inside this suit," to be fair, it's very classy. Black and white, a perfect fit. "Stay here. I'll get Caitlyn."

She storms off and Jayce leans into him. Viktor shoves his hands in his pockets.

"I told you, didn't I," he can smell his expensive cologne and it's ridiculous, how emotional it makes him. "What do you think about the setup?"

Viktor looks around.

It's everything he was expecting. Loud music, dim lights, neon colors, people dancing to the beat. Smiles and drinks. A crowd that makes him feel like sinking down into the floor and never coming out again.

That aside, it's great. It's what prom is supposed to be.

"It's cool," he says, raising his voice over the music, and when he looks at Jayce he's beaming. "Good job, paved the way nicely."

Jayce laughs. Viktor can't hear it, but he can see it and it makes his stomach twist. "Shut up. I'm just happy everyone seems to be having a good time. It's not my scene, though."

Viktor looks at his profile as Jayce surveys the dance floor. He seems so focused, but so detached. This is his job, not something he's meant to enjoy.

Jayce hooks an arm over his shoulders and his thought process dies.

"Wanna go somewhere else? I know that we just got here but I can't stop thinking about what I should've done better organizing this stupid thing."

Viktor nods. "Sure. What about Vi, though?"

"She'll yell at me a bit tomorrow but she'll have fun without us. Come on."

He follows Jayce out, still with his arm around his shoulders, and wonders about the possibilities he considered. Jayce has taken him to prom. As what? He does not know. A friend? Jayce's fingers grace his nape and Viktor shivers and starts to have doubts, but hoping is a big no in his book. Hoping only brings trouble.

Viktor takes a steadying breath once they get in the car, closes his eyes, and opens them to look at Jayce as he checks his hair on the mirror.

"Where to?"

"Wherever."

Viktor snorts, dubious. "You serious?"

Jayce turns and holds his gaze as he says yes.

-x-

Idiot. Idiot. Idiot. Idiot. Fucking stupid idiot.

Jayce had to go and make this platonic-prom-date very not platonic. He had to get close to Viktor and make him drive them somewhere. Wherever. Like in a bad cheesy movie.

He's so screwed. He bites his lip, his heart pounding against his ribcage and his feelings all over the place.

Viktor stops the car, and Jayce looks up and sees nothing but stars.

"You said wherever," Viktor says, voice low but firm. "This is the quieter place I know in town."

Out of the car, Jayce takes a deep breath. He looks at Viktor by his side, and is about to tell him everything, just be done with it, when Viktor turns and pins him in place with a glare.

"What is this all about?" he asks. "Because I can't stand tiptoeing around things like this and I'd rather be clear with you than keep on dodging the subject."

Jayce swallows.

"I..."

"I'm not done," Viktor sits on the pavement, and Jayce does the same. He isn't looking at him, but he looks furious and determined. Jayce swallows around a knot in his throat. "I have a crush on you. It's awful. I hate it. And I need to know if this is like a friendly outing to you, because we are sitting here under the fucking stars and it's-"

Jayce kisses him. It's only a peck but it seems to stun Viktor into silence and Jayce himself isn't sure about the next step to take.

He should say something.

"It's not a friendly outing," he says, bewildered, and Viktor grabs Jayce's face with his hands and frowns. "I mean, it can be if that's what you want bu-"

Viktor grabs him by the ears and tugs at him, and Jayce lets himself get dragged into a kiss. He pushes his fingers into Viktor's hair and smiles when Viktor pulls back and their lips brush together.

"Formal-goth looks good on you," Jayce whispers, and revels in the feeling of Viktor's laughter tickling his lips.

-x-

Vi yells at them for ditching her at prom, then hugs them both so hard that Viktor feels his back pop.

-x-

It's graduation day and Viktor's phone wakes him up at eight am with a text from Jayce.

Jayce: u ready for a tear fest? <3

He snorts, still half asleep, even though he isn't ready for a tear fest at all, and calls Jayce instead of texting back.

"Do you even know what time it is?"

"Time to face our bright future," Jayce says, upbeat, and Viktor groans.

"What about our shaky, tear ridden, present?"

Jayce laughs, with a warmth that makes Viktor smile despite himself.

"We'll deal with that as it comes, one step at a time."

#League of Legends #Viktor the Machine Herald #jayce #jayceviktor #fic #viktor league of legends #one million shrugging emojis

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tulipscassidy · 7 years

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Q&A with Ronald Guttman (Denis)

Q: How much were you told about Denis from the beginning? Did you know going in that you were playing Cassidy‘s son?

A: After the audition, I wanted to know what I was getting into. It was a few weeks in Louisiana and I needed to know what I was going to be able to chew on as an actor. Sam [Catlin] gave me a call and he gave me the arc. I knew the whole arc of the story and that Cassidy is my father. It makes it interesting because it creates a whole relationship between us that’s not obvious at all and comes as a surprise. And of course, it has an emotional content, having been abandoned by his father, that gives me something to play and something that goes beyond just being a bitter old man in a house. It’s usually the father that’s disappointed in the son – and of course, that’s what people could think because I look like his father. It was like a reversal of roles.

Q: How would you describe Denis and Cassidy’s history? Do you think they were ever close?

A: It’s shown how I was born, the love that he had for me through music that he sang and the lullaby. These are the kinds of things that develop on the set. You have a script, you have the graphic novel and you have the actors doing the job. Joseph [Gilgun] is an extraordinary prodigy and an unusual character in life and that really transpires on the screen –his spontaneity, sense of language, rhythm, his heart. … My experience with him on set was a touching experience with him becoming more human and feeling a sense of compassion for me and trying to create a feeling of love. With all the resentment, you still feel deeply connected. You’re still of the same blood. I think we established that as the story progresses.

Q: Denis clearly isn’t warm to Cassidy when he shows up. Is he angry because Cassidy was an absent father or are there other reasons he doesn’t like the guy?

A: I think it’s the lifestyle of the vampire. You imagine that he’s always with another girl or a prostitute. I’m assuming that he has a lifestyle and it’s not something I respect. He didn’t turn out to be a lawyer or a doctor. [Laughs] He’s my father and I think of him as an alcoholic who smokes dope. … I remember working on that and establishing a certain kind of contempt for his ways. Q: What does Denis make of Jesse and Tulip? Why do you think he goes along with them all crashing at his place?

A: I show my displeasure that I have squatters in my house, but I think Denis is enthralled either way. He doesn’t know what’s going on until the Saint arrives and all of a sudden, he picks me up and almost kills me. He tolerates them and they do keep him company. It’s probably a nice thing for Denis to not be alone. Nobody is doing anything bad. There are no orgies or loud music. Q: Once Denis gets sick, there is definitely a change in Cassidy. Does Denis recognize that or does he feel it’s too little too late?

A: I see him caring and singing a song to me. My goal as Denis is to reach his heart and ask him to save me and do something for me, which we see in Episode 7 where I beg him to give me life. I think I do see his resistance crumbling.

Q: Given what he’s seen of Cassidy’s life, why do you think Denis asks Cassidy to turn him into a vampire?

A: You can be judgmental of someone because you’re envious. In a way, one could say Denis has been envious of his father’s lifestyle even though he thought he was using it badly. [Denis] wants to have a certain lifestyle. He still has an appetite. This is not the end for him. He wants women and he wants to live and to partake in the fun.

Q: In Episode 8, Denis pleads and pleads with Cassidy to bite him, even calling him Papa. In that moment, is there some fondness for Cassidy, or is Denis just trying to get what he wants?

A: It’s not a manipulation. I’m so desperate and I’m at the end of my rope. Sometimes you have no choice. It’s almost like he’s killing me and letting me die while he knows he has the medicine. It’s like Angels in America. They had the medicine for AIDS at the time and didn’t want to give it to anybody. You’re sitting on the drugs that could save the life of people, but you’re so selfish that you keep them and you don’t want to share it. Cassidy feels like he has those drugs for me, so to speak. He can actually give me health, so why should he turn me down? What are the arguments?

Q: When Cassidy sings the lullaby, does Denis think he has finally convinced him?

A: Maybe he’s putting me to sleep and that’s the end for me. There’s absolutely no way to find out what happens next. Q: Before Denis, you were on Mad Men as Megan Draper’s father Emile. Do you have a thing for playing French-speaking characters on AMC?

A: [Laughs] You’re right! Yes, let’s keep it going. I should have my own series about a French gallery owner or restaurateur in New York. My first language is French, indeed. I grew up speaking Dutch and French, so I have an easy way with that language and it comes in handy.

Q: What is your favorite memory from being on the Preacher set?

A: Listening to Joseph’s stories in the trailer and trying to understand his Irish accent, which is not always easy for me, and getting the energy he has at nine in the morning. To just be around him is great. He’s a rock climber and sometimes he would find a wall and start climbing like a lizard. [Laughs] I wanted to connect with him and enjoy his presence because he’s the character I’m dealing with the most. Love, hate, resentment, judgment, contempt, need, desire, friendship – all of these things that you have to play with emotion. For that, you want to know the person that is the character that matters the most to you. Of course, also hanging out with Dominic and Ruth [Negga]. It’s a great group of people. Sometimes you go see movies and you don’t see chemistry. You watch them fall in love or kissing and you say to yourself, “Uh oh. I don’t believe it,” but that’s certainly not the case with Preacher. This trio, this ménage à trois, so to speak, is real magic. That’s one of the appeals of the show. They have these long scenes where they just sit at a table and talk, like a French movie full of dialogue. There’s something very experimental and smart about it. You really have to listen.

[x]

#preacher #denis #proinsias cassidy #preacher spoilers #excuse me while I die #cast commentary

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missjugheadjones · 7 years

Text

I Wasn’t Lying

Word Count: 1786

A/N: This was another requested fic, so I hope you enjoy! Its kinda angsty, lol I'm trying to write more angst because everything I write is FLUFF FLUFF FLUFF! There's nothing wrong with that though, I mean everyone needs to swoon and feel butterflies in their stomachs at least once in their day so whatever. Also i cant fucking wait for episode 12, send help! Much love!

MasterList

"You're killing me with the suspense, just tell me, who do you like?" Veronica begged, and Betty giggled, sitting more comfortably on the bed. Y/N grabbed Bettys leg and shook it slightly, as to silently beg Betty to just spill the beans already.

"You guys are so impatient." She teased, and the two girls rolled their eyes, laughing slightly.

"Well we want to know! My bad." Y/N joked, and Betty finally gave in.

"Okay, okay! I'll tell you two." She said, and the girls bounced with joy and anticipation. "You know how I still have feelings for Archie, I don't think I'll ever get rid of them, unfortunately." She started, and the two girls nodded. "But I also have new feelings for Jughead." She said smiling. Veronica and Betty squealed, Veronica grabbing her hands, but Y/N just sat there awkwardly. She had been dating Jughead for about six months now, but nobody in the group knew. They decided it would be best to keep it a secret from them for awhile, they weren't on a need to know basis and they would just freak out over the whole thing. For the longest time, the whole group knew that the two were practically smitten for each other, and they all shipped them hardcore, so finally, one night Jughead got tired of hiding his feelings. One night almost 6 months ago, Archie, Betty, Veronica and Kevin had left Pops after relentlessly asking if the two were together, Jughead grabbed Y/N by the face and kissed her. Thus, their relationship blossomed, and it had been the best 6 months of her life.

"Y/N!" Betty called, and Y/N snapped out of her trance.

"Sorry, what?" she shook her head slightly and looked over to the two girls.

"Are you okay?" Veronica asked. "You look upset." Y/N gave the best fake laugh she could and smiled big.

"I'm good." She said, and the two girls nodded.

"Anyways, you know how Jughead and I have been spending a lot of time together? I guess that's when I started having feelings for him. I first noticed I felt differently about him when we were working together on the Blue and Golds Newspaper. I was having a hard time writing an article on the newest developments on the Jason Blossom case and he saw I was struggling, so he came and sat by me, reading what I wrote. He was sitting so close guys, so close! He took the laptop from me for a second and he edited my article a bit, and when he pushed it back to me our hands brushed. I looked up at him and smiled and he smiled back, and just looking in his eyes and seeing his beautiful smile-ugh! I practically melted, and I felt the butterflies in my stomach." Betty gushed, earning more squeals from Veronica.

"That's so cute!" Veronica exclaimed, and Y/N continued to just sit. "Do you guys do cute things at all?"

"Last week, we were both stuffed in that stupid office for what felt like forever, so he closed my laptop and shoved it in my bag. He took me to Pops and bought me a milkshake, and we just talked for what felt like hours until he realized he had to leave. He had to help a friend with a project or something." Y/Ns eyes widened, realizing Betty was talking about her.

Last week she needed his help with an English project, and he had promised to lend a hand. She waited two hours at her house for him, calling and texting but she didn't get an answer. When he finally showed up, he said he had lost track of time at Pops with a friend but it was too late, she had already finished it. Jealousy bubbled up in her stomach, but she did her best to push it down.

"Oh my god, you guys went out on a date?" Veronica asked, excitedly and Betty shook her head.

"No, I don't think it was a date, unfortunately. You have to be an official 'thing' for it to be a date, but it was so nice." She swooned, and Y/N couldn't help as she let out a huff. Betty turned to her and looked at her confused. "Are you okay Y/N?" she asked, and Y/N looked down at the sheets, playing with them in her hands. She didn't know how to handle this situation, she didn't want to come across as jealous although she had a valid reason to be, because that would make Betty upset. But she also didn't want to out her and Jugheads relationship, it had been nice not having anyone know except for the two of them. Their own private, secret thing.

"I'm fine." Y/N mumbled, and Veronicas eyes widened.

"Oh my god, this isn't making you upset because you also like Jughead, is it?" she asked, and Y/N tensed. Bettys face fell at the realization, she had totally forgotten how smitten Y/N was for the boy.

"I'm so sorry Y/N. I didn't mean to brag." Betty said quickly, and Y/N scoffed to herself, but it didn't go unnoticed by the two other girls in the room. They gave each other a confused look.

"I'm not jealous, Betty." Y/N said as kindly as she could, and Betty shook her head.

"Well then, do I have your blessing to go for it?" she asked, and Y/Ns eyes widened and she stood from the bed.

"I-I don't know Betty." she stuttered, internally kicking herself for being too chicken to come right out and say no.

"Oh come on Y/N, just because you don't have much of a chance with him doesn't mean you have to ruin it for Betty." Veronica said somewhat bitterly, and Y/Ns eyes widened and her jaw dropped.

"Veronica!" Betty exclaimed, looking over to the raven-haired girl and hitting her lightly on the arm.

"What? She's being jealous over the fact that Jughead likes you and not her, and she's being difficult and not giving you her blessing. She should be happy for you, and grateful that you even asked for it at all." Veronica stated bluntly, and Betty hung her head low.

"It would have been nice for you to be happy for me." Betty said quietly, and Y/N finally unfroze.

"I can't be happy for someone who is trying to go after my boyfriend." Y/N scoffed, earning looks of disbelief from the two girls.

"You're dating Jughead?" Veronica asked, and Y/N nodded her head proudly, smiling to herself. "uh huh, sure. And why didn't we know this before?"

"We wanted to keep it a secret." Y/N said, and the two girls slowly nodded their heads.

"How do I know you aren't just saying that so I'll back off?" Betty asked unsurely. "I mean, we're your best friends, you would have told us. And you two don't ever act like a couple."

"Two awkward crush-smitten people who are too scared to tell each other maybe, but not like an actual couple." Veronica added. Y/N stood from the bed and stared at the two girls in shock.

"Are you calling me a liar?" she shot, and the two girls sunk low on the bed, looking at each other and then back at Y/N. Neither of them answered, and she rolled her eyes and pulled out her phone, ringing for Jughead and putting it on speaker.

"Hey princess, how are you?" Jugheads voice called from the other side of the phone, and Y/N smiled at his voice.

"Hey Jug, I'm fine. How are you?" she asked.

"I'm okay. Why fine though, you never say fine unless your pissed off, and I know I haven't done anything... have I?" he asked, earning a giggle from Y/N.

"Like I said, its all fine. Anyways, our 6 month anniversary is coming up and I wanted to know what movie you wanted to go see, I'm buying the tickets." She said, smiling over to the girls and winking.

"Our 6 month anniversary is coming up, isn't it? Hmm, I'll let you decide, but I'm taking you to Pops after, I've got a surprise." Y/N smiled even bigger and smugly at the two girls, but it faded as she saw Bettys face fall. She immediately felt like the biggest bitch to ever live, and that was saying something because Cheryl Blossom existed, granted that Cheryl has excuses to be a bitch but whatever.

"Uh, um yeah. I'll get those and I'll call you back, okay?" she stuttered.

"Okay. Y/N are you sure you're okay? You don't sound like it." He asked again.

"Yeah, I'll talk to you later Juggie."

"Alright." He said, but anyone could tell he was skeptical. "I'll talk to you later princess."

"Bye babe." She said, ending the call. A tear rolled down Bettys face and Y/N quickly made her way over to the blonde, pulling her into a hug.

"I'm sorry for doubting you." Betty said, and Y/N shook her head.

"Don't be, I'm sorry for not telling you earlier. I was a bitch about the whole thing too, I guess I could have handled it better." Y/N admitted, and Betty chuckled slightly in Y/Ns arms.

"I agree." She giggled, and Y/N and Veronica laughed.

"You were a major bitch." Veronica said, making the three of them laugh even harder.

"Just doing what I do best." Y/N said, flipping her hair in a very dramatic way, and rolling her eyes. The two others nodded their heads, their giggling residing.

"Betty, you will find someone soon who isn't taken, or Riverdales very own Troy Bolton, and when that time comes, I bet you'll be so happy. I have no doubt in my mind that whoever takes you to be their girlfriend will be the luckiest boy-or girl to ever walk on this earth." Y/N said, and Betty smiled.

"Got anyone in mind?" she asked playfully, and Y/N smirked.

"Yeah, Veronica." Y/N said, and Veronica and Betty tensed up. "You two gave me shit about the flirting I do with Jughead, but you should see you two, its nauseating." Y/N teased. Betty and Veronica looked at each other and laughed nervously, and Y/N caught on.

"Oh my god, are you two actually crushing on each other, because I was just joking!" Y/N exclaimed, and the two girls shrugged it off.

"Anyways ladies, what are we going to do now? Movies or manis?" Veronica asked, and Y/N rolled her eyes at her friend trying to change the subject.

"Manis." Betty said, and Y/N nodded her head.

"Manis I guess." She said, and the three of them picked out colours, starting to paint their nails, and they enjoyed the rest of their night.

Tag List:

@do-not-call-me-sunshine@gelattoes@xbobaaa@katshrev@farmfreshcoldsprouts@sgarrett49@always-chocolate@nadya0128@spooky-brendons-butt@rainbows-and-glitter-bitch@lost-in-wonderland-x@aezthetically@mrs-jughead-jones @nafa1604

#jughead jones #Jughead jones x reader #jughead x reader #veronica lodge #betty cooper #fanfiction #jughead fanfiction #cw riverdale

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sethmacenzie · 7 years

Text

So I just watched High School Musical for the first time in English.

And I tought I’d take some note. Some turned out to be quiet a lot.

So enjoy my commentary to High School Musical 2:

By the way the fat parts are the songs, as a guide.

It’s the last day of school why is everything so clean? It should look horrible and like the janitor and the cleaning company are going to cry tomorrow.

Mrs Darbus honestly publicly humiliated one of her students. Why is that allowed?

Ryan is looking so much out of the window he doesn’t even notice Jason asking his question or counting with the rest. Also Martha looks like she’s going to throw up.

Troy is so scared of summer. Are they doing that every year?

The school is out but we’re singing instead of going home song.

Did Chad just kiss Mrs Darbus?

Jason asked. Jason fell asleep during the answer.

Taylors bag is very Taylor.

Sharpay is a bitch to so many people – why do they all want her to sign their yearbook and not throw it on her head?

Pretty sure Chad only majored in vacation, considering all he brings to school is his basketball.

Totally normal that Sharpay and Ryan get stalked and chased by other students.

Did I mention the fact that the students are singing and dancing instead of going home?

It really creepy that they are all paired of as love couples and then there’s Sharpay and Ryan together.

How much money do you need to be allowed to paint you locker pink. I mean get it painted pink.

Sharpay is so freaked out from Gabriella doing her hands thing.

Kelsi isn’t that much smaller than the rest.

The picture of Troy and her in Garbiella’s locker.

Everybody looks like they got engaged because of the necklace. Also I’d burst out laughing if someone gave me a necklace with their first letter on it.

You have to admire that kid. He gets straight to the point. Also he didn’t get Sharpay to sign it earlier.

Chad is cockblocking Troy for no reason right before the kiss. And Troy definitely had time to still kiss Gabriella. It’s like Chad know Troy is not into her and makes up an excuse so Troy doesn’t have to kiss her.

Kelsi just closed Gabriellas locker. Also: do kids in America not clean out their lockers of summer holidays. Do they get the same locker throughout their schooltime?

Or hiding! Like Kelsi should. Right now.

Poor Ryan. He doesn’t know what to say. Really doesn’t. Maybe his brain is sort of in the state where he thinks of Gabriella and Sharpay but he’s not sure which answer his sister wants for her argument so he’s trying to see her face in the mirror. And then he makes a wild guess. And he’s right.

Troy. Sharpay. Sharpay. Troy. Sharpay. Sharpay loves herself the most. By far. So far that Ryan has to snap her out of it.

And it’s nice that Ryan tries to get her back to ground by reminding her of Troy’s feelings.

Ryan is so over Sharpay’s shit. He has to calm himself.

So they were singing so long because the school bus comes so late.

Considering how big the Boltons house is I am surprised they have so many college money problems.

None of the guys who came back from basketball are sweating.

There is a paprika in their fruit basket.

If Sharpay wouldn’t have wanted to get Troy to Lava springs he would have never gotten that job. You say thank you not hey is there another job for my girlfriend? AND THE WHOLE REST OF THE SCHOOL.

Zeke just took one bite of a baby carrot and one out of an apple.

Now they look sweaty.

Now not anymore.

Troy’s mom is awesome.

Sharpay’s car. Nothing said.

She put her dog into a little cloth bag and didn’t even secure him or anything.

Why exactly is Sharpay signing the cards? And why does she do this so often, that Fulton and Ryan are in a routine of handing her things?

Where to put the trophy that has definitely a lot of space if we just move the others a little bit closer together?

Ryan looks like he is holding the award, he got every year for the first time. Which he probably is. And that’s just sad.

The old lifeguard did not tell Gabriella anything I am sure. I am also sure the reason he’s smiling so much is because it’s not his job to look after Sharpay anymore.

Why do those girls act like they only see Sharpay in summer? At least one of them was in school a few minutes ago. She also knows about the invasion.

Also the promoted guy is currently still lifeguarding in the spot where Gabriella is later. No wonder he had no time telling her what to do. He probably saw her, told her to sit down and ran as fast as he could.

The Sharpay song. Usually it’s the Ryan and Sharpay song, but this year we’re honest. It’s the Sharpay song.

Why the pool piano? And why isn’t Kelsi playing it. Kelsi you had one job.

Sharpay treats Ryan like her entourage. He isn’t worth more than the girls, he didn’t even get a different towel like Sharpay did.

And why ice tea from England? Isn’t England the country of normal hot tea?

I have no idea what to do with these sunglasses –lifeguard guy.

Ryan is not taking her shit about getting her flip flops. Thank god.

And the girls are not taking it either.

Is that lifeguards job to play along with Sharpays random musical numbers?

How did she get onto the piano without getting anything wet. I bet lifeguard guy had to carry her.

It took like ¾ of the song for Sharpay to finally get some ice.

That’s insulting- what did Ryan show her? I mean usually when people have fold out papers like that it’s nothing kid friendly.

Why is the entrance for employees of an exclusive golf club the one where you walk through the whole pool area?

I love how Ryan first tries to save his sister but as he notices it’s to late jumps away to avoid the water.

And where are Kelsi, Taylor and Martha coming from.

Hire Troy Bolton at whatever it takes. Did Troy call back and was like- hey can you hire like my entire class? And Fulton was like –sure thing?

You should think that Ryan and Fulton would be used to Sharpay’s screaming.

Ryan is so friendly with the yoga guy. So he’s definitely often there.

Ryan’s all like calming down and then when he senses Sharpay’s tense is growing he jumps up.

I love how Sharpay’s mum uses her as a stance for her yoga pose. She is having none of Sharpay’s shit. Not ever. She’s way too used to it. That woman has power.

Why does Ryan pull his hat of for his mom? I mean he is obviously a mommy boy, like Sharpay is daddy’s little girl. So is pulling the hat of like a special just for mom thing? From Ducky to Mom.

They are really just making a handstand out of nothing.

And Ryan told her twice. You can see where he got it from.

You have to feel poor for Fulton. You just have to.

It’s kind of funny that Mr. Fulton acts the same way to Troy like he does to the other at this moment. Like okay, I am pissed at Sharpay, so I’m going to let it out on the boy she likes. Who doesn’t like her back. And he spit on him.

What were those job interviews like? Hey just get all your classmates, well find a random job for everyone. It’s not like this is an exclusive golf club where people invest lots of money to get the good stuff, right?

And still Fulton managed to get everybody a decent job for what they are good at.

Taylor is quiet ungrateful, considering he gave her an extremely important job without her having any knowledge of it whatsoever.

Taylor the smart one: do we have to (do our jobs?).

Martha just said they guy who told her what her job was scares her. Never become an adult Martha or you’ll never leave the house again.

I love the guy with the broom. He is always around.

Next song: We have to work for our money, nobody told us that.

They are complaining about having to do something for their money. Literally.

And why is Zeke in this song. He likes his job.

Strike one: Singing intead of working.

Chad’s holding Martha back from having fun while working. Because he has to call people by their last name.

Jason: having to work for money is not worth it.

Chad’s like I’m in and then he remembers that he doesn’t dance and is like: no.

Why is the normal staff getting along with the song. It’s lunch time. There are a bunch of hungry rich people waiting for their food.

Pretty sure the laundry should not be in the kitchen.

Also: who checks out before getting dressed out of work clothing? That is the loss of time you get payed for.

The future part is too true.

Gabriella brings future up. Gabriella: well let’s not talk about future then.

Reminder: Gabriella’s mom values her job more than her daughter.

Why was Sharpay’s idea to make the people on the hot fairway wet? I mean that makes it only better. Ryan’s face really shows that it was a stupid idea from the start.

Ryan is so concerned. And he’s so not watching them.

Who put the machine where you check in in the middle of the kitchen?

HSM1 I want to sing. HSM 2 I want to work. Troy you spend one movie wanting to sing and making everyone be okay with it and then you’re like: nah, don’t wanna anymore.

Song: The typical Troy/Gabriella love song that is in every HSM.

Is there even any more piano in the background music?

Either Troy has really weird pants or I can see his underwear. It’s his underwear.

Strike no. 2. Singing instead of working.

Troy about five minutes ago: we can work this out. Troy now: maybe we can work this out. But only if I pull Chad who hates this stuff into it.

Since when is Kelsi in charge of the work shifts. Also: they all work at the same time anyways.

Ryan stealing cucumber slice. Probably because he knows that they dry out your skin and don’t actually hydrate it. What kind of spa is this.

Those accents are awesome. If you are like me and usually watched this is another language (note: Troy’s German voice over is the same as Ruffy’s from One Piece) watch it in English.

That Godzilla joke is so wonderful. For 40 bucks I’d caddy for Godzilla. Close. Very close. I’d prefer Godzilla.

And Zeke is baking cookies for everyone. Or everyone is stealing someone’s Cookies. Even Fulton.

Troy has no idea what enchanté means. For the record: it’s nice to meet you.

How can we show how much money the Evans family has. I know, Daddy Evans comes with a helicopter. It’s not like telling them that the golf club belongs to their family is enough.

Also: helicopters are freaking loud, you wouldn’t understand a word he’s saying.

And he left the door open.

Daddy interacting with his kids is interesting. Daddy’s little princess and you can sense some discomfort with Ryan and him. But he still smiles at him like he smiles at his daughter.

And Ryan puts his cap into the right position again.

And I love how Daddy asks about Chad too.

Love in the family means you still play golf with Mommy, but you take a very big step back, because you know how she plays. Or maybe two.

Troy: Daddy. So much sexual indo in this scene.

Ryan lying around in his gold cart is amazing.

Sharpay can play golf. And she is very precise. She clearly didn’t want to hit the mark, but she did she want to hit Chad?

That whole golf trip is fantastic. Also the fact that Sharpay and Daddy can play, but Mommy and Ryan can’t. But they still have an amazing time and fun together.

Chad and Ryan left behind. And I can’t decide who’s reaction is better.

Chad is looking disapproving at Sharpay after she did the least mean thing she did that day. Hook Troy up with the possibility of college.

What on earth happened afterwards that they look like that? I mean Troy didn’t carry that bad anymore.

Fulton is honestly having Jason serve anyone. Not a good idea.

The intend of that dog collar comment is amazing. And really should be a warning.

Ryan looks so sad.

Troy does the right thing and points out his teammates. And still they are pissed at him later.

Nobody is there anymore it’s dark and they still didn’t have desert?

The of course thing Ryan does with his hands is so great.

Troy is more exhausted after that that dinner than after caddying. And that scream is awesome.

Forgetting things. He clearly didn’t forget. He couldn’t get away. Which was obvious for everyone who served, aka Taylors boyfriend. And her sister has weird as shit rules.

Folton obviously wants to go home too. He is so done.

I do not know until this day why they would cut out that song. It is genius. Everything about it.

Left him all wet and scaly. Stroke each tender gill. Double meaning ahoy.

I feel like Sharpay is a south park Hawaiian.

The other girls feel so sad for Ryan. And he is so done with Sharpay’s shit. Why would they leave that scene out? But on good news: he’s not presented as Sharpay’s love interest again.

Troy is so scared it’s hilarious.

The queen demanding his crown back. And his flower necklace. And even Troy knows that Ryan owns that thing.

I honestly think Sharpay is over the fact that Troy won’t date her, but she’s not getting, that she doesn’t at least get him as her partner. I mean if she would stop during romantic stuff and go for siblings or friendship stuff she could do much better with Ryan. And it would be less creepy.

Which shoe designer makes shoes in 9 different colors? A cheap one. Oh my god, Sharpay is wearing cheap shoes.

Gabriella still hasn’t changes cloths. Also she- the lifeguard is not supposed to be in the pool.

There is no way they didn’t see or hear Fulton. There is no place he could have just stepped out of and his shoes are really loud. Unless he was hiding behind a stack of towels watching teens getting it on until it was his time to interrupt.

Troy’s dad is right. Troy is right. Still they manage to not talk about Sharpay, aka the problem.

Now someone has to clean the window because of Sharpay.

Yeah great idea let the little kids jump beside the water, where it can be wet and slippery so they can fall over and hit their heads. Smart one Taylor.

Everybody is watching that offer and still they are later offended. Makes total sense. They would have done the same thing.

These kids are awesome and definitely have issues. I blame the parents. I mean look at them. One is throwing balls, one isn’t using any strength, the girl has it upside down and the last kid is hitting the grass really hard. Maybe spending the summer on the golf course isn’t the best thing for little kids. Who knew?

Taylor is right there listening and still she is later mad at Troy. Because he would sing one song in one talent show to get into college. That is so horrible.

Sharpay is the first one Troy actually teaches anything in the first place.

Daddy is like we all are. If we know one good story we will tell it to EVERYONE.

The whole swiss thing is the first actual thing that Troy did to Chad and now he is mad, only because of what Taylor said earlier. Oh god, the actual problem in this movie is Taylor.

That song is Kelsi’s own work, Sharpay is literally stealing from her.

Sharpay really doesn’t get why Ryan is mad and that is very concerning. I mean you can love yourself, but not being able to see any kind of moral is really creepy.

Okay, now is the first time in the movie where Troy is actually an ass. I mean he could have at least asked.

Neither Gabriella nor Taylor have been talking to Ryan this whole movie and they still know more about his feelings than his twin sister.

And here we have the it’s okay to be gay song.

I’m not saying I’m not straight, but if I wasn’t I’d do you.

And then he ‘did’ him. I mean they changed clothes and all!

I guess Chad is going to end up in his mom’s refrigerator now.

Troy’s photo on Gabriella’s phone is a selfie.

Gabriella you wear practically the same thing that Ryan does. Color wise.

Ryan is such a Hufflepuff.

He immediately tries to ease the tension in any way. First by comforting Gabriella via arm around her shoulder and then by going away because Troy has a problem with that.

Troy is 100% right and Chad has no reason to be mad.

The bad song.

This is the only bad music in High School Musical. I mean someone had to do that to that poor song. I guess Kelsi made it bad on purpose. But how can Sharpay not hear that. It’s awful. But then again maybe she just made sing Sharpay me a bunch of times so she wouldn’t notice.

That wedding dress scene.

Seeing Ryan is relatively colorless cloths is really different, but it looks amazing on him nonetheless. He looks so professional. So adult. Oh yeah, he was 23 in 2007.

Troy’s Sharpay sense is tickling.

Sharpay is so upset without and reason, she’s like Chad. Maybe that’s why Ryan likes him so much. On another thought, that’s really creepy.

You have to give it to Sharpay. She knows how to make an exit. And that drummer is awesome.

Fulton is really trying to be a good person. Really, really trying. And Taylor gets that. It’s so nice.

They’ll need to clean those plates again now Kelsi.

Gabriella standing up for Ryan, when he doesn’t do it for himself is so nice.

The break up song, even though she actually only quit her job.

Do they not meet outside of work ever? That would explain a lot.

You can see that Troy really didn’t change, because his did didn’t notice anything. But then again he didn’t know his son wanted to sing and dance last year.

He looks a lot like you is such a dad joke.

Bet on it. Aka Zac dance like no one’s watching. And we’ll make the whole world watch. Muhaha.

Honestly we all probably look like that when we’re dancing.

Random golf bag appears. Either that or there are some very weirded out golfers on that course.

I’m surprise Sharpay didn’t sign the entrance sign.

Fulton took out Troy with the rest of them. Well played Fulton. Well played. But it’s hard to believe that the one person who got it was Troy.

Damn Ryan looks good. And he’s mocking Sharpay with her own hands.

Why exactly does Chad not have to apologies? I mean okay, Troy wasn’t very well with his words, but he didn’t do anything really bad. Chad is like Ron. Jealous and because of that he doesn’t have to apologies. Oh wait, neither Ron nor Harry did really apologize either. Because teenage boys are idiots.

Chad making sure Troy knows about his boyfriend’s baseball abilities. And everyone should have a girl/boyfriend who looks at them like Chad looks at Ryan.

I’ve been a good girl. I never lied, except when necessary. I always bought by parents expensive gifts, using their credit card, of course. But I don’t deserve this humiliation. We are all Sharpay.

How often did that sock puppet loose against Sharpay. I do not know. But we should maybe keep an eye on her. Or a security team.

Why are they smashing plates? Or was that the sock puppet.

Sharpay hitting rock bottom was very, very needed.

Sharpay is such a bitch most of the time that Troy does not for one second think it’s illogical she gave him a new song last minute.

And the happy ending love duet. What a surprise!

There is definitely no time for practice. That means those poor guys had to listen to that sock puppet until Troy got the song and everybody else changed clothes. Oh and until someone called Gabriella and brought her over. And until Troy got the dance routine. You saw what happens when he dances like no one’s watching. He definitely had to practice that. You can bet on it.

They had a huge ass long routine before and now it’s like just the ending.

Troy is a Hufflepuff too. Only Hufflepuff hold hands out to Slytherins who manipulated them. And tried to get them a college education.

Daddy Evans is acting like Ryan would have his hat crooked without wanting it in that position. It’s called style daddy!

Ryan even slips gracefully on wet grass.

And Sharpay’s dancing with Zeke like she didn’t want Troy 5 seconds ago. Man that guy is forgiving. Is everybody here a Hufflepuff?

The song we didn’t know what else to do with.

Isn’t the talent show supposed to be at the END of summer? Or was it like in the middle and now the real summer is starting.

Yep, you give your brother not shit once and suddenly your friends with your enemy, that’s how it works.

Yes jumping in a pool full of people is cool and they’ll like you, they for sure won’t have you because you nearly jumped onto them.

#high school musical 2 #comentar

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