#it's not even that it was terrible | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

myclericalromance · 1 year

Text

i went to a tiny counterserve diner once and accidentally poured sugar instead of salt all over my hashbrowns and was eating them sadly anyways. the waitress took them away and started making me another one and I tried to protest, but she just snorted and said "we're not catholic here". now every time i'm doing something painful out of obligation i think about how that is not repenting, this body is not a catholic establishment, there is no nobility in suffering.

#edit: i know i did not invent the phrase no nobility in suffering #holy fuck this hit 50k are we all. doing okay.#please stop telling me about sweet latkes i knOW about them #this was a terrible horrible accident involving a sugar shaker with a very large opening that i mistook as being a salt shaker #there was a quarter cup of white granulated sugar on my hashbrown before i could even process my mistake

122K notes · View notes

thelesbianthespianposts · 2 months

Text

imagine: you get your memories back after years of amnesia to find out your whole species is dead and earth doesn’t exist anymore. that the only thing left of your culture is your weird ex and his busted honda civic that barely even works that he stole from the government when he was 13. And he’s been taking members of an alien species for trips in his honda civic and they’re all like “woah it’s so cool” and you get upset because it’s NOT COOL it’s a honda civic, the turn signals don’t even work “wow it can go up hills” yeah OF COURSE IT CAN GO UP HILLS EVERY CAR COULD DO THAT. but they’ve never seen a car before so everything it does is the coolest thing ever. And your ex’s only tool is a fucking screwdriver which is somehow also cool to this dumbass alien species even though it’s a fucking screwdriver so you just look like an idiot screaming about how none of this is even cool it’s actually really shitty but your whole planet is gone so you can’t even prove it but also you’ve had a constant drumming sounding in your head since you were 10 slowly driving you insane. I would become evil too.

#This metaphor might have gotten away from me #Whatever #the master #toschei #doctor who #tardis #the doctor #Companion: wow it can actually fully reverse and go backwards!#The master: *seething bc EVERY CAR CAN DO THAT*#I would be so mad if the only thing left of my culture was my ex and his terrible car #That he doesn’t even have a license to drive #Tensimm #J watches drwho #I really wanna draw this but I don’t have any artistic ability due to there being no apples in my brain #Plus your ex kinda wants to fuck the car

7K notes · View notes

ruporas · 5 months

Text

how to guide your mossball (ID in alt)

#roronoa zoro #zoro #opfanart #one piece #monkey d luffy #nami #sanji #usopp #tony tony chopper #nico robin #not sure if i should even tag her shes just an eye and a hand…. anyway this was for zoro’s birthday ! uploading it a bit late here #definitely an overdone concept i Think but i wanted to draw smth pre-ts with his beloved crew :D #if im not forgetful ill make it a set and draw another with the rest of the straw hats including vivi and then other non-sh!#so many people have come face to face with his terrible sense of directions… i love to think of how those that had the time start to adjust #and problem solve it... its not foolproof though im sure zoro will find a way to clip thru the universe #ruporas art

7K notes · View notes

egophiliac · 2 months

Note

What do you like about the Diasomnia boys if I may ask?

I always love hearing about the different reasons people enjoy characters.

I mean, c'mon. he has split custody over Sebek okay

also, Lilia in particular has maybe the best timeskip character development of all time

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 chapter 4 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 chapter 4 spoilers #stage in playful land #i hope this is legible whoops #anon i am sorry but you made the fatal mistake of asking me to talk about diasomnia #insert 'i just think they're neat' jpg #i do like the other characters a lot but they are definitely my favorites #they just hit a lot of my favorite things in characters i guess!#yes even you sebek even though you keep shrieking NINGEN at me #(it's okay he gets Character Development™ later)#and their dynamic! it's great! these guys frikking love each other SO much and they WILL have terrible terrible angst about it #ohoho delicious #give me all your emotional hangups baybeeeee #also somewhere in there i went from 'i like them all equally (but lilia is the most fun to draw)'#to 'lilia is absolutely my favorite (and still the most fun to draw) (EVEN MORE fun now thank you swishy ponytail!)'#(it was probably when his candy coating got a little scratched and whoops all the tragedy fell out)#(where's that 'get loved loser' post because i need to staple it to lilia's forehead)#i am extremely bad at putting things into words so please don't ask me to explain it any further #just know that the diafam is everything to me and if we don't get more episode 7 soon i'm going to crumble into dust and blow away #we'll be getting the crowleytimes on monday and maybe there will be. idk. some foreshadowing or something in his groovy #probably not but LOOK i'm desperate

3K notes · View notes

saturnvs · 2 months

Text

borrowed my mom’s neopastels and scribbled in my sketchbook 💫

#i’ve been wanting to get the water soluble neocolors #but my mom only had the oil pastels so i tried those instead and might buy the neocolors sometime #SO creamy and smooth to work with ahh i usually don’t even enjoy oil pastel all that much #horses #horse art #art #oil pastel #neopastel #illustration #aware that these are kinda terrible but i love the colors #oil pastels are good for getting in touch with your childish side of art #my art

3K notes · View notes

willowser · 1 month

Text

i think katsuki just answers his phone by barking out, "bakugou." no hello, probably doesn't even look at the caller id LOL when he hears it's you, though, i think he breathes out the tension he didn't realize was coiled in his shoulders, and says a lil, "hey," 🥺🥺

and i think when he calls you, and you answer with your sweet, "helloooo ??" he is so soft 😌 just mumbles out a quiet, "what'chu doin'?" and listens as you tell him, before saying what he needed to 😌

#okay one bkg thought and then i am going to bed hehe #i need him terribly i fear 😔#pls just the idea of him huddling in a corner so no one can hear him 🥺 as he speaks softly to you 🥺#and even if he calls to tell you something—he always asks what you're doing 🥺#and listens 🥺 and engages 🥺#i also dont think he says goodbye LOL #he just says 'alright' and hangs up LOL #or he says 'alright love you' hang up #why does this make me so insane for him idk idk #✿ thoughts: bakugou #✿ theme: domestic bakugou

2K notes · View notes

haunted-xander · 8 months

Text

Pretty pretty butterfly

#this was experimental #and i like it!#pain in the ass tho #butterfly wings so beautiful but so hard to draw #the pattern isnt even the hardest part. its the damn veins #anyway. i love this terrible terrible woman #athena #final fantasy #final fantasy 14 #final fantasy xiv #ff14 #ffxiv #art #my art #xanders art #xanders haunting art #digital art #fan art

3K notes · View notes

laundrybiscuits · 9 months

Text

(ETA: now edited and up on AO3)

Look. Eddie knows he can be a little uptight about these things, but. There are rules. If you become a vampire, you don’t need to go full gothic Count Von Dickhead or whatever, but you absolutely cannot just wander around in a puffy vest and light-wash jeans.

“Why not?” says Steve. He’s leaning back in an armchair, sipping on a bloodbag like it’s a goddamn juicebox. “What, are the vampire police going to arrest me?”

He pauses. “Wait. There aren’t vampire police, are there?”

“No,” says Eddie. “Probably not. I don’t know. But there are standards which you are refusing to uphold, Steven.”

“Thought you were all about hating conformity, Edward,” Steve says. He’s got an obnoxiously cocky little smirk, the smug undead fucker.

Eddie grimaces. “Don’t call me that, asswipe. Don’t you feel, like—the call of the night? The siren song of life coursing through fragile human veins? A hunger for destruction that those paltry plastic bags of blood can never truly slake?”

“The bloodbags aren’t so bad,” says Steve, around the straw. “Better than protein shakes.”

“I actually hate you,” Eddie tells him. “Vampirism is wasted on you.”

Steve noisily slurps the last of the blood out of the bottom of the bag. “Come on, you can’t really picture me in some Dracula getup, can you?”

The problem, of course, is that Eddie really, really can. When Robin had read him in on the whole situation, obviously he’d been horrified and concerned—but also, a whole wing of his brain had immediately been cordoned off to work overtime imagining Steve in elaborate Dark Prince regalia, maybe leaning elegantly out of a castle window on the moors, gazing into the foggy dusk. Velvet might’ve been involved.

“...guess not,” says Eddie. It doesn’t sound incredibly convincing to his own ears, but Steve just shrugs and gets up to throw the bloodbag away.

“There you go, man,” he says, clapping Eddie on the shoulder as he passes. “It’s the 80s. Vampires can be whatever we wanna be.”

———

It gets way too easy to forget about Steve’s condition, until Eddie ends up having to haul him out of a bar in Indy before they get banned for life.

“Simmer down, buddy,” Eddie says, pulling him into the shadow of the van. “Let’s get those fangs packed away before any of the nice villagers wander by with torches and pitchforks.”

“I’m good,” pants Steve. “It’s all good. Don’t worry about it. It’s fine.”

Eddie lifts an unimpressed eyebrow. “Sure, that’s why your eyes are glowing red and you’re, like, fully vamped out. Which, by the way, looks extremely dumb with the whole clean-cut vibe you decided to rock tonight.”

“Fuck you, I look great,” says Steve, pushing a hand through his hair. He’s not wrong, it’s just not relevant to how he also looks extremely dumb like this, wearing a pristine henley with fangs hanging out in the parking lot for anyone to see.

“So what the hell happened in there, man? I was finally starting to get somewhere with Todd, and…” Eddie trails off in dawning realization.

“Holy shit, am I—I’m like your territory, aren’t I? Your stupid vampire brain got all screwy and decided to loop me in with Robin and the kids as part of your freaky human coven.”

“Uh,” says Steve. He looks unhappy in a shifty kind of way. “Something like that, maybe.”

“Wait, so, are Nancy and Jonathan—are you okay with them because they’re both already in the vamp pack? Is Vickie gonna have to be inaugurated before she and Robin can bone down?” Eddie perks up. “Shit, is there a ceremony? We could totally do a ceremony.” He bets he can get the kids to liberate some velour curtains from the drama club. With a few candles, they could get some serious atmosphere going.

“No, shut up, nobody’s doing a damn ceremony,” Steve groans. “Vickie’s fine.”

“Okay,” says Eddie. “So…you gonna tell me what all that was about, then? Do I have to start running guys past you first so your vamp instincts don’t wig out? Or…hm, maybe Argyle’d be down to mess around sometime.”

Steve lets out an actual snarl with weird animal echoes, then claps a hand over his mouth.

“Sorry,” he says, muffled. The shadows around them seem darker somehow.

“So I’m just not allowed to get laid ever again,” says Eddie slowly. “For vampire reasons.”

“Do whatever you want, man.” Steve’s still got his hand pressed tight over his mouth.

“And it’s…just me?” Eddie peers at the tightness around Steve’s eyes; the way he’s scowling stubbornly at his feet. “Huh. Kind of…possessive, Harrington.”

“It’s—weird,” says Steve miserably, dropping his hand at last. “I know it’s fucking weird.”

“Maybe.” Eddie shrugs, biting down on the grin he can feel tugging at his mouth. “Lucky for you, I’m into that shit.”

“What?” Steve frowns. “You’re…”

“Always wanted a vampire boyfriend,” says Eddie. “Like, are you kidding? I would’ve sold my fucking soul at 15 for something like that.”

“I’m starting to feel a little objectified here,” says Steve, but he’s smiling, and he reaches out to snag Eddie’s belt loop and tug him stumbling closer. “Just in it for the fangs, huh?”

“Well, you’re kind of a shitty vampire, actually.” Eddie drapes his arms over Steve’s shoulders. “So I guess I must just be in it for you.”

Steve hesitates, searching Eddie’s face. Stray red lights are still sparking like embers in Steve’s irises. “Okay, but—you’re in it? Right?”

“Couldn’t get rid of me if you tried, Bunnicula. I’ll send the vampire police after you, just watch me,” says Eddie, and kisses him.

#steddie #vampire steve harrington #I don't know what happened; I just sat down and wrote this even though I have a million other things to do #I was briefly possessed by the spirit of 'what if steve harrington were the least genre-appropriate vampire of all time'#and also my perpetual need to write people with terrible communication skills #I may edit this a bit more when it's not 3am but ftr I am not planning on any continuations

3K notes · View notes

bumbleboa · 3 months

Text

of all the good reasons to have an ace headcanon for him, why would you land on this

#not maintagging this #and I wish I could say this was a singular instance #but sadly it isn't #people can be uninterested in sex without being reduced to children or having their intelligence insulted #not even mentioning that a-spectrum experience is so varied in general #the two sides of terrible asexual generalisation: unfeeling robots and children #if you say someone is too dumb or emotionally immature to understand sex #you imply that if they just grew up a little or learned a bit more they would change their mind #ace people get that kind of patronising enough we don't need the call to come from inside the house as well

1K notes · View notes

noxious-muck · 8 days

Text

ok im obsessed. admittedly.

#guilty gear #aba guilty gear #paracelsus guilty gear #fanart #noxmuck #sorry funger moots for uploading mi arte for the first time in ages and its not even funger #get used to it tho #im terrible at fighting games but these two are just sooooo #doing the impossible by learning gg lore to draw them in situations

1K notes · View notes

dapper-lil-arts · 4 days

Text

Anyone else surprised that Rarity has zero bitches in cannon

#rarity #mlp #mlp gen 4 #incredible #she deserves some hoes damnit #like goddamn #pony posting #she even strikes out with dudes #and has a terrible taste in men clearly lmao #poor divorced girl #she deserved some BITCHES #hottest bachelor in ponyville #my little pony #friendship is magic

780 notes · View notes

becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys · 23 days

Text

Fuck fuck everything for fuck damned pissing hell's sake one of my students has used ChatGPT

I wish to commit an act that will in future be referred to by its date

#when will you assholes learn that it produces at best utterly terrible work #even if I thought she wrote this it would be lucky to scape a pass #ffs #now I have to deal with this. Me. The real victim here. A poor innocent lecturer #the professional world of careers and tasks

964 notes · View notes

swordheld · 7 months

Text

do the silly thing. if you do not do the silly thing time will pass and it will not be the same silly thing it could have been. it will still be silly, and it will still be yours, but it will not be the same. this is both a blessing and a curse, but so is living; and if you do not do it now when will you? who will? it has to be you, it was always meant for you, waiting for you.

#this is about writing for me but could be about anything (that is not hurtful to urself or others. very important)#that's why it is silly (affectionate) or cringey (affectionate) like u gotta just let yourself go sometimes. you have to do the thing.#even if it is terrible horrible (not what you want) bc at least then it EXISTS. at least it holds space in the universe and it lives outsid #you can let it sit and rot and gather dust but at least then you can go back to it. even if it's horrible there is at LEAST at least -#one kernel of it that you can bring into the next piece. at least one shining pearl of something.#even if it needs work or months in those lil funky rock tumblers for geodes and gemstones and all. even if needs SO much work.#at least it is there!!! and it is yours!!!#it's your call to action if it's something u want w/ all your heart.#or even a piece of it. if it's something you want? well - it's already yours. it always has been.#you just have to take the first step / the first breath / and begin.#scribbles.

2K notes · View notes

vigilskeep · 7 months

Text