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buckttommy · 23 days

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recontextualizing this story through the lens of buck/eddie and what it means for them, is like. it's so interesting because recently, i got an anon that asked me (paraphrasing) if i thought 9-1-1 would actually "go there" with buck and eddie as individuals, and that three main characters discovering their queerness would be "too much" for the general audience. and, like, not withstanding that it's actually true to life — that queer people can and do naturally gravitate toward each other even when we aren't out / passing / aware of our sexualities at the time — it's also just like. the belief (or disbelief) that 911 wouldn't "go there" with their stories also comes with this inherent assumption that there's only one way to tell a queer discovery story.

like. when michael came out in season 1, he was already at the end of his journey. he had already walked through the self-hate and forced closeting and came out on the other side to self acceptance. when we meet michael, he is a queer man, a gay man (because the word is important), who has already stepped into self actualization and is ready to live his truth. this is not the story 911 is telling with buck.

and then with eddie, you have this character that is introduced with the idea of being perfect, as ryan said, of having it all together, only for the audience to realize he's not. only for the audience to realize that he's broken and cracked on the inside and that a lot of it stems from war. but most of it? most of it doesn't. most of it stems from his father, and from how he was raised. raised to shut it down, to swallow things whole even if they hurt, even if they make him bleed. he was told to keep it all quiet, repress repress repress. and so. i know this is an unpopular opinion, but to that end, i don't think an explicit queer discovery storyline is necessary for him, in the sense that, subtextually, i think it's already happened. season 5 was very much eddie's unrepression arc. we dug deep into the things that make eddie diaz, eddie diaz. and a lot of that was war. violence. chaos."warzones are my thing." but if that was all that his arc was meant to be, why have it end with a conversation with his father? they could have played that arc out in so many different ways.

for one, they could have had mills still be alive. they could have had her and eddie reconnect. they could have had her and eddie have a conversation where she shoulders some of the weight that eddie's been putting on himself and have him settle into the peace of the realization that he's not alone in this specific thing, that he never has been, that other people survived what he did and that he can find solace in them. but the writers didn't do that. they took it back to his childhood, to the root of where eddie diaz began and they said, this is where you need to go. this is what you need to address before you can heal and move on. so that conversation with his dad that culminated in him choosing wellness, in him choosing happiness, in him choosing safety in his body for himself has very much always read to me as queer acceptance even if not explicit (due to the assumed barriers that were placed on that story at the time).

eddie has always been with women, eddie has always liked being with women, so i'd be shocked if he's ever even thought about the nuances of his sexuality. but his unrepression in season 5, to me, has always made him open to the possibility of falling into whatever comes next, whatever that looks like.

this is also not the story they're telling with buck.

(as a side note, i'd just like to say that queer subtext is still queer existence. subtext is how our stories have been told for generations, well before we were able to take up space on the page, and subtext is still a wholly valid and beautiful way of telling a queer story. please don't forget that).

so then, finally, we get to buck, and he's so very new at this. so very green he may as well be a blade of grass on a country club golf course. and so, despite the fact that there have already been two queer storylines prior, this is the first time in 9-1-1 (and tv!) history, that we have ever gotten to see an unplanned queer character discover who he is at this intimate, detailed level. we get to see buck's story unfold in real time, we get to learn about who this actualized version of himself is, as he is realizing it, and we get to know and dissect the layers and nuances, the ebbs and flows of his sexuality as he's taking himself apart and seeing what's underneath.

friends. this is the story they've always needed to tell.

and so, when i think about buck and eddie, and i think about their progression toward a romantic relationship and what that would look like, realistically and in the eyes of the audience, buck has really always been the missing key. we've talked about it before — who he is, who he was, has in no way been ready for eddie on multiple levels. whether it was because of his insecurity, his lack of place in the world, etc, buck has always been (for lack of a better word) too immature for eddie. eddie is a single father. he doesn't have time to play games, and though he will always love and reassure buck when he needs it, he doesn't have time to heal buck for him. nor should he. so buck was the only one who canonically, canonically, needed to be yanked from point a to point z.

and. it's like everyone's said, even before the season began — buck has been on a hamster wheel, buck has been stuck in a rut, yadda yadda yadda, which means that, as far as the audience was concerned, what always was for buck (women) is what always would have been. and there was nothing in canon, nothing concrete to disprove them from believing so. so we needed him to fall into something, not just radical, but sometime new.

and when i think about buck, and when i think about eddie, and when i think about their stories both as individuals and together, buck has, realistically, been the only real stopping point. at least with eddie, when the time is right and buck/eddie go canon, we, the audience, can go back in time and we can look at the way he came into himself and settled into his identity as a person, as a man, and say, like, oh okay, this is the moment. you know? we don't need the writers to take our hands and guide us through the same processes buck is experiencing because eddie's already had his ah moment, he's already experienced the moment where he decides that his life and his needs and his joy and his liberation are just as beautiful and valuable and worthy like everyone else's.

so when people ask, like, "would 9-1-1 really go there with three queer discovery arcs?" it's just like. well yes. they already have. we've already there. in fact, we're well into the third and final act. buck, eddie, and the audience, are almost ready — as in, actively ready — for each other. and yes, sure, even after the meat of this arc has passed, there will still be some things buck and eddie need to learn — specifically, they will need to learn that, not only do they have feelings for each other, but that feelings for each other is actually an option — but. for all intents and purposes, this is the crescendo before the final chord. this is it. and the thought that we've been here, that we've witnessed these three beautiful queer storylines unfold with these three beautiful characters (two of which are gentle, loving, present men of color) makes me entirely too emotional for words. tbh.

#what 9-1-1 is doing ... what they have done — despite this long ass post — it goes beyond articulation. it really does.#to comprehend that we are standing on the precipice of something so uniquely raw and life-changing in the way queer stories are told — it #doesn't get much better...more surreal than this. i know it's been said but the level of care and intention that has gone into telling these #stories is in itself a rarity. and the fact that we get to witness it — that we get to spend this time together — with a cast and crew that #loves these stories and loves these characters as much if not more than we do? its powerful as hell. what a surreal experience this has been #thinking many thoughts and crying many tears #tv: 911 #jack.txt #meta #long post

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ineffectualbookseller · 8 months

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The way Azirphale is underestimated and practically infantalized by heaven is so closely tied to his femininity and I think we should talk about it more because I just want to shout about how relatable the way he's treated in his workplace is as a woman working in a traditionally male field

It's in all the little niggling comments from your boss about personal things that hold no bearing on your work

and the assumption that what you're doing must be simple if it was assigned to you

your work is trivialized

and you get these the placating smiles when you're told plans and proposals are rejected and passed over

or when your complaints are dismissed

and you get more of the same from upper management

it all feels so frustrating and draining but you're at work so all you can do is take a breathe put on that mask and move on with your day

It is all so deteimental to your emotional well being and textually, so much of this is tied to Aziraphale's softness, his gayness - his femininity

The thing about working in an environment and gives you this feeling - of being simultaneously destrought watching your belief in yourself get chipped away but also just so irate becuase you know you don't deserve it - is how it builds. It sinks under your skin and feeds into this indignant dejection until you can have a moment of release - but Azirphale doesn't get to bitch about it over drinks with friends, he doesn't get a lunch break where he can go for a walk and listen to an angry scandi death metal playlist, he doesn't even get the chance to cry about it in the bathroom for 5 minutes before confronting it again

(And I talked a little bit about it in the tags of this beautiful photoset but this all comes into play whenever Crowley dismisses his plans or calls him an idiot. These are purely emotional reactions; I really don't think Crowley means much by it - he respects Aziraphale's opinion and genuinely thinks he's brilliant - but Crowley is so quick to use this terminology when Aziraphale is making a decision Crowley thinks is wrong and he doesn't know how much this hurts Aziraphale. Just like Aziraphale doesn't understand the true impact the Fall had on Crowley, Crowley doesn't understand the ways heaven has been tearing away at Aziraphale's self worth)

Aziraphale has been facing this constant drip of denigration since before the beginning of time and has never released the pressure valve. At this point, he's a bomb waiting to go off

#(I want to note that I am coming at this from my personal experience as a woman #but I know femme neurodivergent and disabled folks of all genders face these same issues)#along similar lines I have tons of feelings about how often Aziraphale hides his hands when talking to other angels #to hide his stimming #and look I try not to tie everything back to explaning why Aziraphale ended s2 the way he did but apparently I can't #its just the juiciest character moment to me #also thinking about how angry Crowley was at Gabriel when he was treated like this once #granted shut up and die already IS the worst thing Gabriel has said to Aziraphale but if Crowley knew how much of this was going on...#aziraphale #good omens #go2 spoilers #good omens meta #Thanks to folks who responded to my tags on that post because you really motivated me to find these screen caps #and finish this post which has been sitting in my drafts for ages #also sorry so many of gabriels faces are funny I cant help that jon hamm is comedy gold - i refuse to let it undermine my point

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killjoy-prince · 2 months

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House M.D. but it's when a character says the name of the episode

#house md #prince's talk tag #flashing #repitition #so as i was watching this show i noticed they'd say the episode title in the episode #so i wanted to see how many times they did it #the people on livejournal who made transcripts of the episodes are my saviors and without them this would of been so much harder to do #thank you all for your service and i hope wherever you all are you're having a great day #sometimes they would use a variation of the word like in the episode poison they would say 'poisoned' or 'poisoning'#i did not include those instances #there was an instance in 'merry little christmas' where they do play the song in the show #but since ella fitzgerald was not a character in the show i did not include it #where as in the episode 'joy to the world' the students are singing it in the concert so i did include that #i apologize for the tonal whiplash when you get to that part but it did make me laugh #one of the times kutner says 'locked in' is overshadowed by the POTW's voice over but i assure you he says it and thats why its in there #out of the main characters from the one who said the title the most to least are #House > Foreman > Wilson > Chase > Cuddy > Adams > Cameron and Taub > Kutner > Thirteen and Park #this took a bit to do lolol its probably been done already but i wanted my own #there is a chance im missing some on technicalities but idc. im fine with this #there are two more i wanna do but with a character saying another character's name but ill do that some other time #EDIT: When I was making this video I was unaware that the Pilot episode went by two names: 'Pilot' and 'Everybody Lies'#Basically everywhere I looked the first episode was only referred to by 'Pilot'#which I found weird bc i remember seeing somewhere that the last episode was paired with the first episode in terms of title #but i couldn't find hard proof so I decided to leave it out at the time #well i checked again last night and yea the pilot IS also called Everybody Lies so I updated the video #I also think it goes well with the fact that House does say 'Everybody Dies' in the finale so another reason to fix it #AND he says it without Wilson while he and Wilson say the title of the pilot sooooo yea hehehehehe

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luck-of-the-drawings · 1 month

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so REVENGE, HUH? or justice, if that makes you feel better. it tastes the same when cooked just right. 'I REALLY WANTED A BROTHER.' such a shame to burn a bridge you so desperately wanted to keep, especially when it wasnt even you who started the fire. especially when you hope that not a single fragment of that bridge ever washes ashore.[MAY IT ROT FAR FROM MY SIGHTS] an unfortunate loss! atleast he has his friends.

#jrwi fanart #jrwi show #jrwi prime defenders #jrwi prime defenders spoilers #jrwi pd spoilers #jrwi pd #william wisp #vyncent sol #THIS ONE IS FUUUUCKIN OOOOOLLDD RAAAHHHHH i made it like. a year ago. but didnt finish it for so so long bc i just wasnt happy w it.#BUT LIKE A CENTURY EGG the decades of being encased in salt n lime n ash have done WELL to bring out the flavores of this piece #i sorta recently cleaned it up and posted it onto twitty. didnt tag it bc it was SO OLD AND SCUFFED(i see so many MISTAKES NOW)#that i didnt want to expose it to the open air just like that #if i show smth to my small circles then it shall only be understood in those small circles.#open air and open interpretation from minds i cannot predict are NOT something i enjoy the thought of. usually. i am brave tho #BUT EVERYONE ON TWITTY WAS SO NICEEE i was like damn... i guess it IS good enough to be enjoyed by the masses...#lets work on being nicer to our art together. THAT BEING SAID. i really love my colors here HELL YEAHHHH #FIRST TIME IN A WHILE COLORIN THESE BOYS.... i dont use proper color enough..I ALSO RLY LIKE MY BACKGROUNDS HERE #i LOVE when the bg is hyperrealistic (i frankestiened stock photos) and when the subjects are all flat colored n cartoony #recently rewatched Making Fiends and they do that similar thing!! soft shading! lotsa details! almost painted? ill paint one day #ive already rambled so much abt the art im runnin out of ROOm to ramble about WWWIILLIAM GODDAMN WWIIIISP. its been a minute since i saw-#-this episode..but i DO remember the funny smoke trick that will did to his funny brother. EVERYTIME U GIVE AN ORDER. THAT BRINGS HARM-#-INDIRECTLY OR NOT. YOU WILL HEAR THOSE SCREAMS. YOU WILL FEEL THAT PAIN. OHHH WHAT A COOL PUNISHMENT THAT IS #its still an olive branch in a sense! a final chance for big bro bell to show that hes NOT an irrideemable piece o shit. and if not #well. to the wolves of psychosis with him!!! i really think william did the best he could here. if i was in his shoes i have no doubt i-#-woulda done the same. IM ALSO GLAD THAT VYN DECIDED TO STICK AROUND N SUPPORT HIM! thas character development baybe!!#i loooove prime defenders.. its been so long since i watched any eps of it but i KNOW it still has such a grip on my heart..GOTTA rewatch i

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bucephaly · 6 months

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It's kinda shocking to me how few people seem to know how prevalent the 'my great grandmother was cherokee' myth is and how it's almost never actually true, especially when it comes with things like 'never signed up' or 'fell off the trail' or 'courthouse burned down destorying the documentation' etc etc.

People just don't even seem to know the history like.. when the Trail happened. My great great great grandfather was 2 years old during Removal in 1838, so peoples 'my great grandmother hid in the mountains!' is so clearly wrong. And we have rolls. From before and after removal, rolls done by cherokee nation and others by the government, rolls that were not stored in one random flammable courthouse. It's not difficult to find the actual evidence of ancestry.

And just.. there are lots of ways those family stories get started. It was a practice during the confederacy to claim cherokee ancestry to show one's family had 'deep roots in the south' that they were there before the cherokee were removed. Many people pretended to be cherokee and applied for the Guion-Miller payout just to try to steal money meant for cherokees - 2/3rds of the applicants were denied for having 0 proof of actual cherokee ancestry. [We even see lawyers advertising signing up for the Miller roll just to try to get free money.] And the myth even started in some families in the cherokee land lotteries, where the land stolen from us was raffled off, including the house and everything that was left behind when the cherokees were removed. We have seen people whose families just take these things stolen from the cherokee family and adopt them into their own family story, saying that they were cherokee themselves.

If you had some family story about being cherokee and you wanna have proof one way or the other, check out this Facebook group run by expert cherokee genealogists that do research for free. Just please read the rules fully and respect the researchers. They run thousands of people's ancestries a year and their average is only around 0.7% of lines they run actually end up having true cherokee ancestry.

#and ive heard even dumber origins of the cherokee family myth #such as an ancestor having a silly sounding name so the descendents just go 'oh she mustve been an indian!!!'#i was one of the few people who had my ancestry done on the facebook and had genuine cherokee ancestry #[though i had found it before it was just really validating to get it double checked and i started finding cousins (:]#like. i was told once when i was a kid by my grandma that my dad had cherokee ancestry and i didnt believe her. its wild that so many peopl #will make it a Fixture of their identity [or even just smth they bring up ever] with Zero proof #at least for cherokees from what ive seen its usually considered really disrespectful to claim to have cherokee ancestry without #actually having the documentation [like ancestors on the rolls]#and no a dna test doesnt count. nor does 'my dad is Clearly not white!' or 'high cheekbones' or old family photos or anything #i had this discussion with someone recently whose dad had been calling himself 3/4 native but didnt know exactly what nation ???? hello?#and its like... sorry but ur dad is like. italian lol.#[and blood quantum is bullshit anyway im tired of the 'im 1/16 cherokee' comments its dumb #cherokee nation does not have a blood quantum requirement. its pointless bringing it up in the discussion of who is or isnt cherokee]#also mandatory disclaimer that im reconnecting. i didnt grow up connected to the culture of even knowing my ancestry #this is all from my looking into this stuff over the past year or so. i cant claim to be an authority over anything regarding this #this is p much all my repeating things ive heard said by people who know a lot more than i do haha #man. and this isnt even starting to get into the fake tribe stuff. the only legit cherokee groups are the 3 federally recognized bands #cherokee nation of oklahoma. united keetoowah band. and the eastern band of cherokee indians.#any others that are state recognized or not at all arent acknowledged as legitimate by any of the legit cherokee groups #anyway. my final message goodb.ye #cherokee #tsalagi

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ferret-who-likes-robots · 11 days

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When they fuckin get you

I arrive again with another drawing! This time, fanart for @missterious-figure's swamp things au!!

#sun and moon au #swamp things au #sundrop #moondrop #i'm a simp #fnaf sundrop #sundrop x oc #sundrop x self insert #moondrop x oc #moondrop x self insert #Soon there will be more fanart from me #Of bowtie sun #And pink boots moon #Also planning on making a fanfic since its been said we can #Though i'll start that (ignoring the many other ive started-)#After i finish the backrooms au oneshot #almost done!!

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moomoorare · 4 months

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Need I remind everyone Purgatory is done and it was just a game, for FUN!!!!! Same will be for purgatory 2!!! I understand having bias and favorite teams but do not in any case bring down others because yours is too special or whatever, they were all the same, they were all trapped in there with tensions high and did things they normally wouldn't, the characters acted accordingly to their lore, it's okay to be upset at some decisions made but god don't make it a state affair. It was just Block game rp alroiughtt

#all the vitriol for bluefire and bolas is like insane dude #they were different teams who had different game play #like they all did things differently #blue to win red to not fall in despair and green because they were green and gay and ninjas #all im saying is .#yes bolas was upset with qbad (said specifically about the character bc they did clarified a bunch) for spawncamping jaiden and charlie #and cellbit was absolutely bloodthirsty #so were many others #like okay so they were all wrong or meither were and even if theyre wrong girl. its a mc roleplay with much more upsetting elements #its not a church play stop treating it as such #like even after a month i keep seeing discourse about it #girl be like elsa and let it go #and maybe try seeing the good side of things. they're back. the eggs are back. no relationships or friendships have been tarnished more they #already were at that point #many things and interaction have changed. but for the better #so gooooood idk appreciate it???#or not idc but let it go #qsmp purgatory #rare rambling

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ganondoodle · 2 months

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Have you seen the post lately where they talk about Ganon's personality/motives in TOTK? Like how the english version translated it poorly so he seems kinda....vauge as hell as to why he behaves the he does?

i have not, only what i assume are reactions to that post?

and i mean ... i doubt it makes much of a difference, i havent seen the english version either tho, as i played it in german-

now i do wonder what could be read as vague in english though, what is vague about wanting to overthrow a kingdom threatening to overthrow yours if you dont become their lapdog?

(i dont think it was consciously intended to be written as an imperial superpower assimilating and exploiting everything around them bc they believe they are god blessed good tm people and anything that refuses to bow their knee to them is thus evil and deserving of death or eternal servitude and those that 'happen' to refuse the goodest good guys are heavily stereotyped desert people

but it sure is)

#ganondoodles answers #zelda #like many people have said #though maybe moreso in my little tumblr bubble #havent been online much since friday bc of family stuff #anyway i hope this doesnt come of as mean #i just dont think it can change all that much unless its a misstranslation ala that line in botws end fight #and even then i wouldnt know bc i play it in german which is very different from engl njaldnhljsabfljs

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dr3comebackera · 4 months

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Daniel Ricciardo on his Zandvoort crash, surgery on his broken hand, recovery process, and return in Austin

Tom Clarkson: "Now you mentioned the elephant in the room, Zandvoort. FP2, Turn 3, what happened?"

Daniel Ricciardo: "I *awkward laugh*, I mean I obviously can remember it very clearly, since I didn't hit my head. Erm, but, so you come through, turn, I guess it's Turn 2, and it's over kind of a crest, but then you stay quite tight, because, then the line for 3, you ride the top of the banking. So you know, you're not taking a conventional racing line, so you're not like looking at the apex, you're looking at the top of the corner, pretty much. Like, as a driver, we're always looking ahead and normally like at the apex, but the way you exit 2, you then kind of look straight ahead and pick your braking point."

DR: "So at that point, I'd exited 2, I hadn't seen any yellows, nothing like that. And then by the time I've looked and braked, I then looked where I need to turn, and I see Oscar. This all happened so quickly, but I remember, I can, obviously I'm picturing it in my head now. So I remember, okay, the line we take is high and by this point I'd braked, so I'd already committed, so I knew the speed I was going. My only choice was to take the high line, but I could see his car was at the top of the track. So there wasn't enough room for me to pass through the high line. I'm going too fast to take a low line, so it was either, probably look like a real idiot and crash into him, or try and just slow the car as much as I can, and likely just crash into the barriers, which is what happened."

DR: "But yeah, because it was all, I guess I'm still trying to figure out what I'm going to do, by the time then I'd committed to just going straight, I hadn't then realized, 'okay, take your hands off the wheel.' And a lot of us still don't do it, because crashing is not natural. And it happens so quickly, because you don't plan to crash, so a lot of the time you don't kind of have, yeah, the time to be like, 'okay, I'm crashing, what do I need to do? Brace myself, okay, take my hands off the wheel.' Sometimes you just don't have the luxury of time."

DR: "So, that was it, I hit the wall. I've only watched one replay, but I just don't, I don't want to. Basically, when I've gone in, I'm pretty sure like the right front, it's just the angle, right, the right front would've grabbed the Tecpro [barrier] first, and then that's, like, pulled it in, so it's, it's like I've turned really hard right, the way obviously it's grabbed the wheel. So because the wheels then turned so quickly, I've basically lost grip, so it spun out of my hands, and the bottom of the [steering] wheel, which is pure, hard carbon, has then come up and basically karate chopped my hand."

DR: "So then, you've got the shock of the crash and then adrenaline, so I've come on the radio, and I'd, I think I'd been like, oh sorry, like I've crashed or something. And then, is he like 'oh, you alright?' or 'can you continue?' and I was like, 'no, the car is damaged.' And then, I could feel my hand, and I was like, 'ow, my hand, my hand.' And then I just, it started to, like the pain just went, obviously ramped up really, really quickly, and I feared that something was bad. So, as I'm, I wanted, I was like, 'I need to get my glove off, I need to get my glove off.' And as I'm pulling my glove off, I remember, I was thinking, *awkward huffy laugh*, I was like 'if there's a bone through the skin, I'm gonna pass out.' So that's all, I was just like 'please, please don't let me see anything gruesome.' I'm not good with this stuff, I'm sweating telling it, like I'm serious. I suck at this.

TC: "Have you broken a bone before?"

DR: "I broke my arm as a kid at school, throwing a tennis ball. Anyway, yeah, another very random accident, and I didn't need surgery, that was like a long, long healing process."

DR: "But yeah, so, alright, so I've pulled my glove off, and I, I could see it was already quite swollen, but no bone through the skin. I was like, 'okay.' But then the pain just got so bad, so as soon as I jumped into the medical car, I was *long pause* making a lot of noises, because I was in a lot of discomfort. So I knew that it was not good. I knew immediately, obviously, I wasn't going to race on the weekend. Like I didn't need a doctor to tell me. I feared it was a broken bone. I think the first thing that really kind of just made me sad, was I just had a very, very productive summer break. I felt really, really good physically, and I was just, yeah I was just ready to go. And this just felt like an unfortunate setback. But I was just more worried about surgery and all that, because I'm, again, I'm a bit of a wuss.

TC: "What happened next, I mean, you went down to Barcelona, to Dr. Xavier Mir, who is renowned in the MotoGP world, for mending those sort of breaks. I also think he was, didn't he help Lance Stroll earlier in the year as well?" "Yeah" "So who put you in touch with him, or did you know him already?"

DR: "So from the medical center, we went to the hospital there in Amsterdam. Got scans, and they're like, 'yeah, it's broken.' And by this point, it's the size, like, looked like an elephant stepped on my hand. The doctor there said, 'look, I would recommend surgery.' He's like, 'you can have it here, but you probably want to wait anyway a few days for the swelling to go down. Speak to whoever you need to speak to and obviously you can have your surgery wherever you want, I'm just going to give you my advice.' So then we reached out to Lance, we reached out to, well Jose, a friend of ours who works with Alpinestars, so he knows all the MotoGP guys, and he, he's Spanish as well, so he knows. So he, I think, put us into touch with Xavier Mir, and then, yeah, Lance was like 'go to him' as well. All signs were just pointing to, this guy's done this too many times, just go see him. Like, like don't even bother, just go there.

DR: "So it was, it was a blessing and a curse because, *laughs* he does a lot of MotoGP guys, who, are not human. They are not. It's fact, they are not. So, I think there's an expectation of me going in there, he's like 'oh, F1, MotoGP, same! Not human, don't feel pain.' 'No, doctor, I feel pain. I'm going to cry for the next 48 hours whilst I'm in this hospital.' So it was just funny, they, I think, you know, all the doctors and nurses and that who were helping me, and they were great, but I think they were, they were just quite, they would laugh a lot, because I would wince and pull away and ask questions every needle that went into my arm. Erm, so I think they just thought I would be tough like a MotoGP rider, but I am not."

TC: "I'm sure you were."

DR: "No, no, trust me, I'm not. The break itself was quite significant. It was a shatter, like it wasn't like, oh you just break it clean down the middle. I think it was in eight pieces or something. So it was also, for a bone that can be quite a simple one, it wasn't too pretty."

TC: "So it's your pinky that was being affected by it?" "Erm, well..." "On your left hand?"

DR: "It's like the outside of the hand. So that's the bone I broke, in between like the wrist and the pinky, like that knuckle. So like along the outside there. But even me just rubbing my finger over the top of my hand, hurt like crazy. Maybe I just feel pain more than others, I don't know. *laughs* But er, sorry, I just want to, just let's also say one thing. There was also the reality where, yes, I would moan and complain because I don't like the pain. But it was a broken hand, so there was also a part of me which was like, 'look, dude, yes you're in pain and it's going to be a bit of a process, but people have worse injuries, people have bigger accidents.' So don't get me wrong, I also tried to reality check myself through it all, and I think that's what made me quite, like remain quite positive."

TC: "You missed five races, you came back for Austin. Was there any talk of you getting back earlier, maybe for Qatar?"

DR: "So I knew, I was doing physio every day, and I was, I was doing what I could to come back as soon as possible. But I also wanted to make sure, and I think, you know, Red Bull/Alpha Tauri were really good with this, I wasn't fighting for a world championship, like it's not like, dude you need to just drive through immense pain and just get a point, you know because this is your titles on the line. Like it was, let's make sure you do this and heal properly, and get the right treatment, because also you've got, hopefully a second part of your career which is going to be long and glorious. So it was just, don't compromise anything that you then have a bum hand for the next two years of your career, three years, whatever. So it was good, I could just do it properly."

DR: "Qatar was talked about, I went on the sim the week of Qatar, on the Monday, but I couldn't, er, yet, drive with the full force of the steering, like so we would like bring the feedback down. Er, I just couldn't grip it and do more than like two laps at full strength. So it was very clear that Qatar was out of the question, and also for me to come back and like, yeah, I don't know, not drive at my best and then, no, that no one benefits. I don't benefit, the team doesn't. So er, it was that, at that point we're like, let's just go all in for Austin and make sure I'm good for that."

TC: "And Liam was doing a decent job as well"

DR: "Exactly, he was doing well and there was also, I think Red Bull were great to give me a contract whilst I was injured, to give me a contract for next year. So I, I had that-"

TC: "That was very significant, wasn't it?" "Yeah" "They actually signed you long-term when you were on the sidelines?"

DR: "Yeah, there's so much about being back in the Red Bull family this year that's felt good and right, and I think that was such a, yeah just such like a big thing for them to do that. I think obviously it showed they have a lot of faith in me. It also put to bed if anyone was like, 'oh you know, is there still any issues from their previous relationship years ago? Like is there any carryover tension or whatever?' Like, for them to do that, I think it was very much like, he's our kid and we're going to support him because we believe in him and- So that was really nice."

TC: "So you come back for Austin, and were there any ill effects there? Because I mean, that's a quick track, sector one in particular."

DR: "Er, no, like in, in short no. Erm, I think the race, I got into it quickly and, and, and I was actually honestly expecting more pain in Austin. I was expecting like every kind of bump or kerb I'd hit would be like 'ow, ow, ow.' But it was okay, and erm, I think it was just an endurance I needed to build so like, towards the end of the race, I could feel like my grip strength was maybe not as good as at the start of the race. But honestly, I was, I was fine. And I think that was another thing, I didn't want to get back into a race and then be like, 'yeah I could have done better, but you know, my hand was not up to full strength.' Or like, I was like, this can't be an excuse, and it wasn't, so it was all good."

TC: "And Daniel, you were never going to miss Austin, right?"

DR: "No, I couldn't. I would've loved the result to be better, but no, I couldn't miss Austin.

TC: "The track, the place"

DR: "Yeah, yeah. I love it."

#daniel ricciardo #f1 #i've listened to this beyond the grid podcast a few times now and i just need everyone to hear/read this part #he gives so many details about everything that happened including all the pain he felt :(#very much would like to give him a hug #also the broken arm/throwing a tennis ball story is crazy too #he talked about it in another video #i think a red bull on the sofa end of year video #and he said it snapped random because he had a medical issue (but didn't know about it) where his bone had been weakening over time #and it just hit its limit and snapped that day when we went to throw a tennis ball back to some classmates #also i forced myself to change all his ums and uhs and curb to the way he would spell them #i wanted this to be in his voice lol #dutch grand prix 2023 #dutch gp 2023 #zandvoort #daniel and his broken hand #the image of him crying in the medical car and hospital makes me sad :(

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jadewritesficshere · 9 months

Text

Presenting

Alpha!Steve Harrington x reader

Synopsis: You present for first time as an omega

A/N: hello all! So I know there are many different types of A/B/O fics out there. Some people say ruts/heats happen once a year, once a month, twice a year, etc. There is some discussion on the exact private parts omegas vs alphas have.

Well, what I envision may be similar or completely different. This is my take. This is my fic. I have a whole lil world for this, and have a few mini blurbs/oneshots planned. This is the first, which I've struggled to have the courage to post since March. Also: reader and Steve are over 21 in this.

Enjoy.

Contents: mostly a bit of backstory on a/b/o dynamics, fluff, first presentation. Gender of Reader is not specified but Steve does call them Honey.

Steve opened the door to the house, grumbling as he juggled the groceries in his arms. He should have taken more then one trip, but with the light rain falling, he didn't want to stay out in the cold more then he had to. The door swung open into the unlit hallway. Steve wasn't surprised. Eddie was at work, and Robin had plans with Vickie. The only person he was unsure of was you, but you had been working nights and it wasn't unusual for you to be asleep at noon. What was unusual was the smell that hit Steve's nose. His nose twitched and he frowned as he tried to identify it, before shrugging it off and heading to the kitchen to put groceries away.

Steve grimaced as he looked in the fridge and saw the plastic container holding Eddie's lunch from last week. The lime green jello Robin had made wiggled as Steve reached past and grabbed the container. Without a second glance, Steve tossed it in the trash can and continued to empty the fridge of old food and replace it with the groceries he had bought. Steve hummed to himself as he thought about what he could make for supper.

A noise from the other room made Steve pause. It had sounded like one of the closet doors had come off their track again. You must have woken up and were getting changed. Steve's heart thumped a little extra at the thought of you, causing Steve to curse himself. He had tried to hide his feelings for you, not wanting to make the living situation awkward if you didn't reciprocate. Eddie gave him shit about how strong his scent was when you came near. Of course it wasn't intentional, biology and all that, but Steve couldn't be mad when it had deterred other Alphas from you. Steve just didn't want you to feel awkward, especially when he glared and growled. He didn't want you to think he was upset because of you. Steve wanted to shower you in love and affection, but you weren't his. You weren't anyone's. You were just you. Amazing, beautiful, talented you.

Robin and you were both Betas. As such, you could smell the scents from Omegas and Alphas, but it was no stronger then if you got close to a flower and sniffed or the spritz of cologne or perfume. Eddie was another alpha, but took suppressants (which he forgot to take half the time, causing his ruts to be a little more unpredictable...). Eddie confided in the group that he was going to stop taking suppressants after this next rut, but he had taken them for so long because he hadn't wanted to seem like an aggressive alpha like his father (who was currently facing life in prison). Steve's parents were both alphas, so it wasn't a surprise Steve was.

Presenting as an alpha or omega was strongly linked to genetics. Regardless of the parent presentation of alpha or omega, if one parent was and the other was a beta there was a possiblity. If both parents had presented, then it was extremely likely for the pup to present as well. There were, of course, cases of the pup not presenting and being a beta, but it was unlikely. Thanks to more modern technology, betas could reproduce with another beta. These pups had low chances of presenting, but was not impossible.

However with presenting were the stereotypes. Steve couldn't care less, agreeing with Robin that a lot of the archetypes were heavily influenced by societal norms of feminine versus masculine, and that there was nothing "wrong" with an alpha that wanted to be a housewife or an omega that wanted to be a CEO. Since the four of you living together, Steve has embraced the more "omega" traits he has, feeling more settled and free than when he had to live up to his parents expectations.

Steve remembers the day he presented, hearing his parent's praise. He then remembers being left to his own devices to try and figure it out by himself. At least they handed him a pamphlet and had stocked the kitchen. Steve learned a lot from that stupid pamphlet. You could present as young as 12 all the way to 25. The first day of your presentation, the genitalia would shape more to your presentation and your scent glands would come in. By the end of the second day, the genitalia would be formed to handle and work with the opposite presentation. By the third day, you would endure a typical rut or heat like you would for the rest of your life. Your first rut or heat would be unable to produce pups. The entire presentation would only last from 3-5 days.

Steve shook his head, wondering why thoughts of that stupid pamphlet had come to mind. Steve stretched as he closed the door to the fridge, the calendar catching his eye. Steve's plain black misspelled scrawl at the end of the month noted his rut would arrive. Robin's green handwriting beneath simply said "sucker" to which Eddie had replied "suck her amiright". Steve shook his head as a grin spread across his lips. Eddie's red haphazard scrawl was written on the next weekend with question marks, indicating his rut if he had taken the suppressants correctly. Your blue "good luck" beneath reminded Steve that Eddie was going to come off the suppressants (did he get a cake for that? Beer?).

Steve left the kitchen making an extra note to grab snacks that had higher nutrients and protein for their upcoming ruts. Steve paused in the hallway as the smell from earlier hit Steve again. It smelled like that honey body wash Robin and you were obsessed with, but also had a hint of something that was more familiar. It grew stronger as Steve walked further down the hall. Steve paused outside your open door and inhaled; the scent being extremely strong here. Steve's eyes widened as he realized that familiar scent was you. He had never smelled you this strongly before, what with Betas not really producing a strong scent.

Steve peered into the room, concerned something was wrong. He was wracking his brain trying to think of what could cause your scent to be this strong. Your walls were filled with Polaroids of your friends, posters of your favorite bands, and some paintings Robin had created. It wasn't as covered as Eddie's, but it showed your personality. The carpet had some clothes haphazardly strewn about, but overall you kept the room clean. Your bed, were Steve had expected to find you after your shift, was empty. Your pillow was gone, which was odd, but maybe it had fallen off from your tossing and turning. Steve blinked a few times before pushing the door open more and leaning in. Your room was definitely empty. Your closet was open, stuffed to the brim with clothes. He could see your desk in the far corner of the room was not being sat at.

Steve frowned to himself and looked at the shut door opposite your room, the bathroom. Oh...You must have gone to the bathroom. Steve went to knock before pausing, he didn't want to interrupt you if you were busy (he knows how much you and Robin hate getting interrupted when in the bathroom, regardless of what you are doing). Steve shrugs and continues leisurely to the next door, his room. He throws open the door without a care-

And nearly keels over. The scent was overpowering here, which confused Steve as he thought it had been you. A whimper from the closet made Steve's head snap in that direction. The closet was closed, but uneven; the door was off the track and barely hanging on. Steve crept to the door and opened it, gasping.

You were curled into the fetal position on his closet floor. On top of his clothes, hangers bare above you. You had pulled his jacket on top of you, and were laying in a pile. Your head laying on your "missing" pillow. The polo he had worn yesterday was clutched in your hands, held close to your face that was scrunched up in discomfort. Steve stood there, jaw wide open, as he tried to understand what his eyes were seeing. He cleared his throat, causing your eyes to snap open. "Stevie?" You whisper, peering up at him with glassy eyes. Steve crouched down to be on your level as you shift to sit up from laying down.

"What's going on?" Steve finally asks, feeling like the biggest idiot. His brain screaming the answer at him, but he couldn't believe it. His brain bringing that pamphlet back to his mind with fanfare. He had to hear you say it he-

"I dont know!" Your voice cracked and your chin wavered, tears filling your eyes. "I dont feel right and i couldnt get comfortable and all I could think of was you and i came in here and it felt right but everything was too much so the closet was perfect and i just i dont-" your rambling continued as you started crying, barely able to speak as sobs overcome you. The scent rolling off you shifted, indicating your distress. Steve's eyes widen and he drew you into his arms," hey, hey. It's okay. It'll be okay." You relax into his arms, nose tucked into the crook of his neck.

Steve feels your body shudder as your cries slow, inhaling slowly at his scent gland. The trill you let out shocking you and confirming Steve's thoughts. Steve hesitantly runs his hand up and down your spine in a comforting motion. "Honey...you're presenting. You're, " Steve clears his throat," you're an Omega." You shake your head "no" against his neck. "You can present until you're 25. Hell, I think the oldest person they know of was 40. It isn't an exact science-" Steve pauses, realizing Robin must be rubbing off on him as he's rambling.

Steve leans his back against the wall and shifts you around so you are between his legs. You are curled into his chest, nose still firmly pressed against his neck. Your tears have gone. Your scent is overpowering to Steve, completely entrancing him. A hint of spice, like nutmeg, mixed with that honey bodywash. Steve finds it ironic that he calls you Honey and here you are smelling so strong of it.

"I'm presenting," you mumble pulling back to look in Steve's eyes. "How will that work?" Steve hesitates, mouth opening slightly, before you cover his mouth with your hand," I don't mean like how omegas work. I get that. I guess...with like you and Eddie." You slowly lower your hand," I don't want to cause an issue."

"You won't." Steve says definitively, "Eddie always says he's married to rock and roll. We've never been the type to fight over territory. This is his house but it's also mine. We're all in a pack and we are all equal." "Even if I'm less tha-" "hey!" Steve's brow furrows and he holds your face in his hands," You are not less than. Anyone who thinks omegas are less than are idiots. You are not less than an alpha, and anyone who believes that bullshit needs some sense knocked into them."

You bite your lip but nod. "It's the first day right?" Steve asks, wondering if it's crossing a line. It is highly personal when an omega goes into heat. You don't seem to care, nodding your agreement. "Well, then today will be the easiest day. We can get a game plan set up tonight when Robin and Eddie come home. Get you some blankets and pillows. Get you snacks."

Steve shifts in his spot and your hands dart out and grab his biceps, "Don't leave!" Steve smiles softly at you," I won't. Not right now. Come here." Steve holds his arms open again for you. You slowly lean in and let him envelope you in his hold. Secure. Warm. Feeling entirely safe in his arms, you drift off to sleep. Steve can feel his heart bursting with love for you. A part of him knows that if you sought him out, you cared somewhat for him. But the other part screamed at him how he couldn't tell you his feelings yet. He didn't want you to feel like he was taking advantage of your new presentation.

So for now, he would be content with just sitting and holding you. Safe. Secure. Warm.

#The first of many lil fics but I wanted a basis of this world so that is why this is so descriptive #The next won't be #And yes there is no smut in this one but there will be in future ones but cmon you just learned life changing news #And your parts are still presenting as I wrote so #Is this the best NO but its a glimpse of what's to come #This has just been sitting here and I've had 0 guts to post so I said screw it I'll post it and then just continue with the universe #A/B/O dynamics #Alpha!Steve Harrington #Alpha!Steve Harrington x reader #Steve Harrington x reader #Steve Harrington x you #Steve Harrington x y/n #Steve Harrington/reader #Steve Harrington/you #Stranger things #Jade is Talking

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