#mpreg sniper

[witcher-heart]

A/B/O SniperSpy AU

This will be a cross-faction blu-spy/red-sniper AU

This Will be a master post where I will post just all of my written information of the AU and will reference this post.

QUICK RUN DOWN! Blu-Spy (Jean) and Red-Sniper (Mundy) are in a relationship, Spy is an omega but was chemically repressed at a young age because his father didnt want an omega to be his successor. Due to some respawn fuckery Spy grows into his omegan features and has a heat but doesnt know because of lack of sex ed. Becoming pregnent he goes to medi and medic deff keeps that shit from him because he wants to study the effects of multiple influences on a male pregnancy. Spy does NOT alright he has enough on his plate already, but oops here comes baby and well now that I have and and I made it its mine now.

Less unhinged ramblings under the break

In Universe Lore

Omega’s are the pinnacle of breeding and are made for it. 49 out of 50 Beta born babies are born without any major conflicts while Omega born children have a 49.8 chance to be born without defects. There is still the possibility but it is very low. Some comparisons can be made but while beta women have a menstrual cycle Omega’s have an estrus cycle. This comes from the fact Betas are fundamentally and evolutionarily different from Alphas and Omegas. Betas are a different species from Alphas and Omegas and are able to breed hybrids that are fertile. This means there are such things as degrees of class, Betas are labeled as such when a person has not enough Omega or Alpha genes to have an estrus cycle meaning their body falls to the menstrual cycle.

Omega’s are better for breeding as their children face less chance of complications like deformities and are not as affected by sickness or toxins from the mother. Omega’s have an innate urge to stop these addictions if they are fertile. An infertile or low fertility omega has a high chance at drinking and smoking. Omega’s on heat suppression medication can be addicted to drinking and after stopping the medication will stop craving alcohol and actively avoid such dangers to their fetus. This is all subconscious and may not even be noticed by the Omega in question. 

This is where we observe the mental differences of B from A and ꭥ. B have very low connection with their more animalistic instincts. Alpha and Omega’s have a closer grasp over them, or more like their instincts have a stronger grip over them. When an Alpha or Omega feel more vulnerable their instincts are heightened and often override rational thought. It is like if fight or flight was magnified. Pregnant Omega’s will exhibit habits such as nesting or food hoarding. Unlike when nesting for their heat a pregnancy nest will be made up of their mate and their scent as well as hold snacks and the like. The invention of preserved foods upped this instinct. They will also prefer to nest in darker and confined places. They might even make a nest under their bed or inside a closet. The smaller and more inclosed they are the less they feel as if some threat could get to them. Omegas will also get more and more threatened as they progress into their pregnancy. More protective of their stomach and baby. 

Alpha’s during their mate's pregnancy have some instinct of their own though they are less obvious and less studied. Increased aggression to strangers and possible dangers to their mate and the need to provide is on overdrive. Bringing their mate food and anything that they want really. The farther the Omega, Alpha, or Beta are bonded the stronger the instincts become to the Alpha seeing as they themselves are not affected by the pregnancy directly. There is also a noticeable decrease in aggression against their mate (In the sense of submission) causing the alpha to concede and agree more often with their mate. 

Assigned Secondary Genders for Characters

RED

-Medic/Omega

-Spy/Beta

-Sniper/Alpha

-Soldier/Beta

-Engineer/Omega

-Demoman/Alpha

-Heavy/Alpha

-Scout/Beta

BLU

-Medic/Omega

-Spy/Omega

-Sniper/Alpha

-Soldier/Alpha

-Engineer/Beta

-Demoman/Beta

-Heavy/Alpha

-Scout/Omega

Character Lore

Spy (Jean)

Born in France to a cold and callus Father, his mother died in childbirth. His father of course was a spy and expected Jean to become one as well, in public his father was a high politician and was very popular with the upper class. Jean was left alone with the house staff and his teachers. He also has an older sister he grew up with before she was sent off to finishing school. She is a beta as well as his father, betas are much better suited for the spy profession as they can pose as any secondary gender being neutral. Jean was of course born an omega, his father recorrected that quickly having Jean chemically suppressed from fully developing. From here Jean learns all he can before being sent to a boarding school specifically for spies in training. Earning his own name within the French government he soon surpasses his own father in notoriety and takes time to reconnect with his sister, they become pretty close. BLU contacts him from an outside source and wants to set up a contract to fight for them. Jean thinks the whole thing is immensely stupid but it pays much better than the government is. He says goodbye to his sister and packs up to wherever BLU is sending him for the time being.

Sniper (Mundy)

Found in the wilderness as a baby, Mundy was found by a lonely couple that owns a small farm away from any major city. They take this as a sign to raise him as they couldn't have children on their own but knew no reasonable adoption agency would allow a couple living in the Australian outback raising various animals and helping any odd one they come across. Mundy had seemingly fallen into their laps at the right time. He is a quiet baby at first but slowly becoming more and more fussy. Having a background in veterinary his mother noticed Mundy was in pain but they had no idea what kind. It became more and more apparent as baby Mundy had trouble grasping toys or focusing on anything. He has hyperopia, or farsightedness. Knowing it was an eye problem his parents take him to the nearest optometrist and get him prescription sunglasses. He slowly loses the headaches and is a happy baby once more coming into toddlerhood. He develops a love for animals and rifles from his mother and father respectively. Living so far out they have to grow and hunt for their own food, his father figures out how good Mundy is at shooting as he takes him out for hunting, taking off his glasses Mundy can see ridiculously far and can shoot some impossible distances with the help of prescription scopes. His mother can tell how much he loves helping her take care of animals and gardening and teaches him the basics of Australian Husbandry. He gets a name for himself as one of the best tour guides for the outback and is close to the animal conservationist. He first shoots someone as he sees them trying to poach some animals, not to kill but to maim but he soon discovers that people are not that easily deterred. RED gets wind of the wonder rifleman and brings him on as a Sniper, he takes the job for the money and often sends entire paychecks back to his parents to help out. His parents don't see eye to eye with him often but they love each other.

Miscellaneous Headcanons

- Spy deff hated Sniper at first but never with any malice just a general distaste for the bushman but the thing is that Spy created his own caricature of Sniper in his thoughts. A disgusting man who showers once a month and an obsession of piss. An Australian animal that is as brash as he is rude. This aint Sniper in the slightest. Sure he comes off like it but he is very genuine and always polite to his betters, coming off cold because he has no idea how to actually talk to people living out in the wild for the longest time the only contact being his parents. (Also bite me Sniper is 100% autistic thats just how it is) He has a very hard time expressing himself so he just avoids people when he is able. He loves animals and often has knowledge f any animal he might encounter. He only kills animals for food, never for sport. Humans on the other hand. Family is everything to him and he loves his parents so very much even if they are not his real parents (They find a baby outside one day in the Australian outback) ((He might have, MIGHT, have been raised by dingo's before he was found but he will never press his parents if that story was a joke or not because he is scared of the answer.

- Spy was sexually attracted to the person he painted Sniper to be because Spy is a freak, but he falls in love with the real Sniper

- Sniper had honestly hated spy even of he never spoke to him directly, he could sense his preppy air and was immediately warded off, the suits the fancy cigs the accent Everything repelled him even if Spy was slim thick with the cute ass. There rivalry faded as Sniper faced him in combat, Spy could hand himself well against a bigger opponent and the way he twirled his knife. The more Spy wins in their fights the more Sniper begins to see the real Spy, the emotional intellectual that could take down a task force if he had to. Empathetic to a fault  as it helps him act as someone else but also makes him vulnerable to strong emotions this is why he hold himself at arms length with any acquaintance.  Spy also has an unhinged side as he gets lost in emotions, he keeps close as he sees it as embarrassing. Sniper finds it super hot.

#team fortress 2 #team fortress headcanons #blu spy #red sniper #sniperspy #alpha/beta/omega dynamics #mpreg #autistic posting #tf2

[thecount03]

So whenever in the timeline Aurora happens, it was hard on Fang, dysphoria and hormonal changes were a bitch

And sadly transphobia too, though he was perfectly able to defend himself he often had to stop Nic or the others voiding their pardons for murder

Especially Nic who pulled her knife on idiots more than once

It was uncomfortable, he was moody, puked at the smell of fish and his back and feet hurt and yet it was worth it when he got to hold Aurora

He still isn't going through that again even if he ever wants another kid

#fang the hunter #fang the sniper #fang the jerboa #nack the weasel #sonic au #nack the knave #sth au #rainbow hooligan au #trans fang the jerboa #trans fang the hunter #trans fang the sniper #trans male pregnancy #mpreg #aurorua the jerboa-bear

[ask-charlotte-and-james-au]

Jeremy and his baby girl, Charlotte!

(New chapters for Charlotte are being released in the coming days! I've been working hard on the story and I'm finally writing the ending! I hope to release the whole story soon, but in the meantime:

Go check out the new chapters! )

#charlotte & james #charlotte & james au #tw mpreg #tw implied birth #tw implied mpreg #charlotte #sniperscout #tf2 au #tf2 fanfiction #also not me realizing i totally forgot to put snipers emblem on the red shirt xD

[pregnantsecondo]

I was so ready to answer this but I can't fucking remember why I got into mpreg 💀

#kind of scary actually dear lord #uhhh #ok so im trying to remember a timeline #i think it was bc of tf2 not bc im remembering anything specific but bc tf2 has an mpreg thing #and also i got really into pee bc of sniper tf2

[somnolent-scout]

damn I upload a couple chapters of Charlotte and now there's another fic about my least favorite subject

Had to mute the guy cuz that's way too terrifying for me

#basically someone posted a trans sniper mpreg fic where sniper reeeeaaaaally does NOT want the kid #but based off my very brief read through it looks like unfortunately he's gonna have it anyways #i was originally gonna look at it for inspiration #but then it turned out to be the worst most terrifying nightmareish scenario #almost vomited tryin to read through it #you'd think id get over this shit by now right?? #but nope unwanted unplanned pregnancies especially those involving trans men and teenagers #those just drive me to tears or nearly vomiting every fucking time

[agirlwithmagicpals]

The mistake 

After the incident at bean’s cousins wedding let’s just say fang has been overwhelmed by his own personal guilt even if bark jr were to comfort him(which is something he does a lot) and thus takes things more personally now than ever so whenever bark found out later on the week afterwards that a certain pregnancy test he took was positive he kept this well….to himself…. for a couple of reasons actually mostly involving fang boi’s family especially nack he really doesn’t deserve a grandchild after all the egotistical nonsense and narcissistic behavior he’s been using against his own son for so long.

Bean was of course offended by the fact that they were late but fang did indeed apologize to the guy although that didn’t seem to change the fact that bean was being a heck of a lot more supportive towards snowy now more than ever as the spent a lot more time together going around robbing jewelry stores, blowing up other baddies secret lairs, breaking and entering when nobody’s home, realizing that snowball has been vomiting 🤮 in the morning while also gaining tons of weight and sometimes just not feeling well.

WAIT A MINUTE-

Oh boy did things go down hill extremely fast….after quite a couple of weeks to a few months(5 months at the most)fang found out about bark’s strange symptoms and automatically suspected that the lack of protection in bed may have resulted in the poor polar bear’s misfortune.

next thing you know after bean went ahead and told fang about his concerns for the big fella let’s just say that a click went off in his head and my god almighty was he fuming 😡 although bark knew he could’ve just tried to prevent this from happening via protection in bed or have a discreet discussion with planned parenthood about ending the pregnancy 🫃 before things got out of hand or maybe even adoption but no he didn’t want to do nether one of those things cause he really really hoped they could somehow keep the baby when in reality it was already too late to reconsider from the get go due to both intersex related issues and karma not doing bark jr any favors whatsoever.

That wasn’t the only other thing that was not doing them any real favors cause next thing ya know a tiny unknown spy of egg man’s rats team hooligan out to the king of the acorn kingdom (which is a guy called king ray in my au) who was shaking with disgust at the thought of these dastardly people procreating to which bark jr defended himself and co. via letters which eventually became public knowledge ruining the reputation that they kept on for so long.

These guys were the first few mobians to find out first besides the king, and as well as sonic jr/flash wave although it wasn’t too long until these three told a certain witch the “good news” involving said scandal they’re the ones responsible for spreading it like wild fire 🔥.

you can only imagine what kind of chaos went down after that….

as the two knuckleheads needed to be there for one another now more than ever regaining there support system after all that guilt and frustration washed away any façade present and showing each other what kind of people they actually are before making up afterwards.

#bark the polar bear #fang the sniper #bean the dynamite #the witch carters #agirlwithmagicpals #sonic au #bang pop au #team hooligan #sonic archie comics #tw pregnancy #tw adoption #planned parenthood #mpregnancy #mpreg mention #intersex #lgbtqia #drama #oh god oh man #ah Christ #tw sexuality #tw sex mention #oh boy oh boy

[jevilowo]

Headcanons about the mercs' childhoods

Because I spend far too much time thinking about this

Scout was and still is the only one of his brothers to not have black hair and green eyes, and thus the only one to not look like his Ma. Growing up he was always told he was "the spit of his father".

Soldier was popular with the girls in grade school because he beat up any boys who bothered them.

Pyro is, and has always been well aware that pyroland is a fire induced hallucination. They just don't care that they're burning people to death. ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥.

Demo would busk (play music in the streets for money) sometimes in his early teens to get his mother of his back about jobs. Also because he genuinely enjoyed it. He played bagpipes and piano.

Heavy learned how to play chess and how to box from his father. Later on, he taught the same to his sisters.

Engie was obsessed with stuffed toys when he was young, and still is (he has four plushie cosmetics and thats not even counting the animals that may or may not be alive)

Medic was born after his mother (a witch) mpregged some guy she was trying to blackmail.

Sniper was non verbal until he was six, when his dad taught him to shoot a rifle. The first thing he ever said was something like "bloody brilliant, can I do that again?"

Spy woke up in a white room when he was ten and that's his earliest memory. His agency picked him up from god knows where, completely wiped his memory and trained him (and many other kids) to spy.

Oh yeah and they're all trans

#tf2 #team fortress 2 #tf2 headcanons #tf2 scout #tf2 soldier #tf2 pyro #tf2 demoman #tf2 heavy #tf2 engineer #tf2 medic #tf2 sniper #tf2 spy #trans fortress 2

[goddessofroyalty]

Fandom: One Piece

Going through my One Piece scribbles to do a final clean up before FF7 takes over my life from probably tonight and found this one that was me playing around with trying to match the more silly tone One Piece can get.

Law is used entirely as a convenient outsider POV.

Pairing: Zoro/Sanji

Tags: omegaverse, mpreg, accidental pregnancy

-----------

“Are you kidding me!? Again!?”

Law makes a point of trying to ignore the Strawhats’ antics as he travels with them. Strawhat’s crew is as insane as their captain is and often loudly bicker amongst themselves seemingly just to give Law a headache.

The shrillness of Nami’s voice and way Blackleg practically prostrates himself at her side in pathetic submission has him tuning in.

“What happened?” The Strawhat’s sniper asks as the rest of the crew’s attention is drawn onto the situation as well.

“Sanji’s pregnant. Again,” Nami informs them as Blackleg lets out a pathetic whimper that would perhaps be more worrisome if it wasn’t the exact same candor as the one he gave when the strawberries he was using the previous night for desert weren’t large enough for him to carve into perfect flowers for the girl’s. Law doesn’t try and understand why a man who would happily kick anyone’s head in if they suggested he may be less for being an omega immediately breaks out the keens and whimpers associated with his designation at the first sign of any even slight offence to the women on his ship.

The navigator’s offence is deserved from Law’s perspective. While they had hidden them well the fact of him travelling on the ship with them had necessitated he be introduced to the two other children that had resulted from the unique relationship between swordsman and cook of the Strawhat crew.

“Woohoo! New crew member!” Strawhat himself crows, completely missing the gravity of travelling with a pregnant omega aboard.

Although considering they had already successfully done it at least once before Law supposes the confidence is somewhat justified.

Strawhat rattles off his list of demands following the exciting news. A feast the first, most detailed, and apparently most important, among them.

Not that much attention is being paid to him. Nami still standing with her hands on her hips looking at Blackleg expectantly.

“It’s not my fault my m- the only option I’m stuck with for my heats is a mossy brute!” Blackleg justifies. And Law is sure they all caught the slip in his words. And all know exactly what he was about to say.

Despite the two – soon to be three – children they share and the fact the world knows them as the Monster Mates of the Strawhat pirates, both Blackleg and Zoro’s necks stay bare of a mating bite.

“I didn’t do anything you didn’t ask for,” Zoro says from where he had been napping on the ship. He had had their youngest asleep with him but the boy had woken up with Strawhat’s excitement, running off to join the noise.

Blackleg glares at his not-mate and Zoro moves to quickly block the foot aimed at his gut for it.

“It’s your stupid knot that keeps breaking the condoms,” Sanji says, driving his heel into the sword Zoro has blocking him.

“It’s your fucked up fertility that keeps getting pregnant so easily,” Zoro snaps back, pushing against the food driving down onto him.

“Enough,” Nami says, before they can go into any details of how they managed to conceive three children together. Her hand coming up to massage her temple.

#One Piece #zosan #roronoa zoro #zoro x sanji #vinsmoke sanji #One Piece mpreg #mpreg #One Piece omegaverse #omegaverse #I accidently a ficlet

[casualartisanninja]

This was a long time coming.

So, first of all I’m sorry that this took me so long to make, but there was a lot of information to sift through. I’m not planning on coming back to Tumblr in any capacity beyond this but the truth needs to be out there. (And if you're curious about the profile picture/description/etc, I had to dress this blog up a bit so it didn't look like a bot and trigger any algorithms.)

Content warnings for this post: 

Heavily discusses kinks and has screenshots of fetish art

References grooming/pedophilia accusations

References transphobia/harassment accusations

This is going to be an EXTREMELY long post with lots of screenshots, so the rest is under a cut.

Edit: Here is the end of the post so you can read it all at once. https://www.tumblr.com/casualartisanninja/747977941832613888/loose-ends

The incident in Hobqueer’s server

I think a good place to start would be the spark that set off this whole chain reaction. 

I’m not sure how long I’d been in that server for when the NSFW in general incident happened. But one thing’s for sure - I didn’t start the conversation about NSFW topics. Like I mentioned on the Reddit post where someone had found me and started accusing me under my comment on the Janitor.AI post, I saw the people there discussing mpreg and oviposition. I looked at it and thought “wow the rules are a lot more lax than I initially thought!”. Yes, I know, looking back, that should’ve been a huge red flag. I also know that, looking back, I should never talk about NSFW in the general chat- even if everyone else is doing it. “If so-and-so jumped off a cliff” and all. I’m really sorry that I did that, and it was definitely a lesson for me.  But I really wasn’t thinking about that at the time. It wasn’t my intention to hurt anyone, and I especially wouldn’t have done it if I knew minors would be there. I know it wasn’t an 18+ server, and it was just a frankly idiotic move on my part. I just saw “Sniper pregnant” and pictures of the mercs with big bellies, and let my better judgment and reasoning get clouded.  However, the way that they’re portraying this incident is extremely intellectually dishonest. Gabriel failed to mention in his callout post that those minors were looking at and sharing fetish art of the mercs, leaving out most of the context for those. Thankfully one of my friends from Chipspeech (who I’ll leave anonymous) joined the server to check and see if the fetish art was still there. It was. Hobqueer and the moderators never deleted any of the discussion, and worst of all they left the fetish pictures up in full view of everybody. One person, who later admitted to being a minor in a dm, even gave a pretty graphic description of a tentacle hentai/mpreg comic. Be warned, this contains NSFW content. I blurred the names of anybody who isn't mentioned in this post.

I've run out of room for images, so I have to add the rest in another reblog. This will be a very long thread with a lot of images, so please bear with me.

#mavisposting #xxcherenkov-gremlinxx #allegations #accusations #explanation #debunking #tf2 fandom #chipspeech fandom

[svorica]

sniper scout mpreg

#tf2 #sniperscout #my art #team fortress 2

[3amclothesmonster]

inbox viatch 😔🫃🫃🫃🫃🫃

Inbox has been infected with Mpreg. Sniper rifle, calling all reenforces

[disfrutalakia]

sorry in advance but,,

qforever mpreg? O_______O

kill me if this is too far, literally hire a sniper n take me out,, but i wanna know ur opinion LMAO

No thank you for giving me the excuse to talk about it actually.

I just think that, if qForever got pregnant it would be like one of those dramatic movies where he doesn't know for months and thinks it's just a flu and all his friends are around him like "dude you should do a pregnancy test you haven't had a period in 3 months" and he is just like "no you guys it's just from stress from presidency, it's fine!!!"

But he is in fact pregnant and keeps doing the math to try to figure out the most likely father (will not say the options but they exist)

I also think he would sob when the test comes out positive, not because he is sad but because he has to build a new room in his base to put a newborn in.

Qforever wouldn't abort but he is pro choice okay!!!!!

#asks #suggestive #mpreg tw #i guess #have never had to tag for that in my life #first time for everything

[blubushie]

Would you put mpreg sniper art on your ceiling for 50 dollar

Mate you literally could not pay me enough to go through the trouble or embarrassment of having that shit printed just to hang it on my ceiling. Nor could you pay me enough to go through the self-flagellation of staring at that shit while I'm trying to sleep.

#blu whos #tf2 #sniperposting #fuck you for making me tag that i hate you

[0sbrain]

i love the tf2 comics, they give the power of inflicting so much psychological damage "sniper is 27" i say without blinking an eye. "miss pauling asks spy to spit in her mouth" i ramble as you mortals tremble in fear. "medic invented mpreg" i cackle maniacally as a mob of normal people try me to stop

#tf2 #tf2 comics #i am sorry but also i am not

[wildlife4life]

Fuck-it Friday

Tagged by: @buddiearemydads1

Alright so I have felt like absolute shit these past two days because mother nature is paying a visit and is kicking my ass like she loves to do every month. Anywho, I've paused a bit on working on my WIPs because I am not in a good head space and I just do not have the energy. Honest to god it took a lot more than I thought just to post this. Anywho's, this is a snippet of a different a/b/o fic that I started before the whole Doug kidnaps Buck one. This one has mpreg Eddie this time! Its not an abandoned fic and I plan on returning to it, but I've been focusing on my other fics. So fuck it, here's a snippet.

Making it to the landing, Drew immediately spotted the bearer of the chocolatey scent.  A very pregnant male omega, with tanned skin, shiny chestnut hair, and soft brown eyes. Besides the obvious pregnant belly, he looked to be in good shape, with lean muscle definition in his arms, legs, and torso which was uncommon for an omega.

Said omega was currently laying across the couch with a pack of Oreos in hand, and the beginnings of a small cookie tower balanced on his enlarged abdomen.  His tongue poked out in concentration and Drew was just confused by the whole situation.

“Um…” the beta voiced, startling the omega, and causing the tower of four Oreo’s to fall onto the floor, a few of them breaking.

The spice in his scent soured a bit, indicating the omega’s mild fear of an unknown presence but it quickly faded away.  “Oh hey, wondered where the man behind was.” The omega had an underlying southern accent.

“Yea, I was pushed into a dumpster on the last call and needed to wash the stink out.” Drew answered slowly, still trying to figure out who this omega was and why he was chilling out on the station’s couch.

The pregnant male snorted, “Been there.  Better than a sewer pipe though.”

“I guess… I’m sorry, but you don’t seem to be in any distress, so I’m just a little confused as to why you are up here?”

“Well until I was put on stupid bed rest a few months ago, this was my place of work.” The omega answered, annoyance lacing his tone.

Immediately Drew caught on who their guest is. “Holy shit your Eddie Diaz.”

“Technically Buckley-Diaz, but yep that’s me. And you are?”

Drew didn’t answer at first, because he was…well he was somewhat starstruck.  Eddie Diaz is one of a handful of omega first responders in the state of California and he is a badass.  Pulling a live grenade from a man’s leg, climbed a tilted hotel and a submerged Ferris wheel, and survived the sniper attack back in May. His saves were legendary and he broke through all the glass ceilings held above omegas. 

“Um…” Diaz squinted a bit, eyes on the beta’s chest, “Firefighter Heyward, you good there?”

“Holy shit I didn’t know I was covering for you! Oh my god! And did you say Buckley-Diaz? Buckley? As in Buck? He’s your mate?” Drew finally caught the underlying scent of ocean salt and smokey cedar of his fellow fireman mingled with Diaz’s spiced chocolate. “Holy shit!”

Not up for any tagging today. Hope you all enjoyed. I'm going back to scrolling, liking, reblogging, and reading fics. Takes less energy.

#fuck it friday #911 fox #911 fic #buddie #buddie fic #a/b/o verse #mpreg #og character #wip #mother nature sucks #periods suck

[pregnantsecondo]

Really late on mpreg Monday (I had this in my drafts and forgot to post so HERE WE GO!!!)

Mpreg Monday man is Sniper TF2!!!

In my vision, Sniper has a kid after he finds out he's adopted. I feel like he'd have to come to terms with the shit stains that are his birth givers (I'm biased here)

He hides his pregnancy. For a good while. Six months in and he's like "yup this is a beer gut" and medics like "I...don't believe you anymore." And engineer is like "I built a super powerful x-ray machine and there is quite literally a baby inside you" and spys like "also you haven't consumed alcohol in months"

He raises the kid in his camper. But he makes sure that it's "suitable" for a child. Which means his guns are locked in a case that only he can access and that all of his knives are put away.

He stops smoking after he realizes he's pregnant. Even after he's given birth to the child, he still doesn't smoke. He figures that he wants to set a good example.

This baby is swagged out in animal furs.

#mpreg monday #mpreg headcanons