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waywardsalt · 1 year

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thinking abt linebeck’s coat. something very alluring about it for some reason. so im just gonna ramble about it here instead of in the tags for once

you can probably start a fight between the people who think it’s a coat and people who think it’s a jacket but i think it’s a coat moving on

the character designs are interesting to look at due to the proportions and art style so it is hard to imagine how long his coat would be but i think it would go down to a bit above ankles because i think that’s good. it’s a bit more dramatic a bit more impressive(?) that way and would probably lead to problems tbh

based on some of the official art i imagine that the stripe at the bottom might’ve been a late addition since it’s missing in the bit of official art most used to represent linebeck. tbh linebeck is inconsistent in very tiny ways in the official art but that’s mostly if you’re gonna be nit-picky or bored enough to notice

his coat is so good it’s simple but very recognizable and stands out among the other character designs in ph and its just. yknow good character design

its also surprisingly good for headcanons and stuff and because i mostly take a lot of canon as suggestion i have a good handful of headcanons tagged specifically onto his coat (one of which is the length of it ig)

i like to imagine that he made it himself. i’ve seen stuff where people write linebeck as being able to fix link’s tunic when it gets torn and i feel like the logical extreme of that is that he made his own coat. i think that adds a layer of. importance to it? it’s unique it’s solely linebeck’s it’s tied to him because he made it with his own hands and maybe it can represent something about him that way?

i like to imagine that in addition to the normal pockets one the outside he’s got a whole lot of little pockets on the inside of the coat, like so many pockets that he hides little trinkets or tools or things he steals in either to keep or to take back to his ship for whatever reason. some of the pockets have little flaps of whatever they’re called that can be secured in place with a small button to keep stuff in

he’s got like pencils and a compass and little notes and tiny figurines and cool rocks and feathers and all kinds of little things he thought was worth keeping around and due to that his coat is uncomfortable sometimes but if he knows for certain he’s going to be busy doing stuff he’ll empty out all of the pockets and only leave the important stuff so that it’s lighter and less uncomfortable. link finds his coat lying around at some point and is caught so badly off-guard by how surprisingly heavy it is with all of the bullshit he keeps in all of his pockets

i also imagine he values it a lot, maybe to the point of being really possessive and protective of it, not letting link touch it and if it gets torn or stained he shuts down and has to fix it before he can move on to anything else, and if he can’t fix it at the time it leave him kind of overwhelmed or upset until he can fix it. he has a lot stocked-up materials specifically for his coat to avoid a situation where he has to go for while with his coat damaged

backing away from headcanon territory, his coat is just a cool bit of character design and has just been lodged in my mind for a while. its cool and never brought up within the game (obviously) and i guess a last little closing thought is that in the cutscene where oshus teleports link above linebeck it kinda looks like his coat moves when he tries to catch link and i think that’s cool

#afraid of clogging ph tag so ill just tag this as #linebeck #character development not hiding in the tags this time #salty talks #this is how i talk on discord but i fear initiating social interaction so heres this #im in some kind if weird denial ever since that last totk trailer bc i think ive been lowkey constantly overwhelmed ever since seeing it #ugh. i miss linebeck. totk scares me and so does the fact that i cant get myself to be as excited as everyone else seems to be able to be #typing this was painful bc i turned off my autocorrect on my phone a while back bc it fucking sucked and now its like #man i am bad at typing on a phone holy SHIT #coat post thinking about linebeck helps me feel good. also projection he’s my go-to for projection when like anything happens #i imagine his coat as like. a comfort item to some degree. like it’s something he made himself and he’s had it for a very long time #like i have a comfort item or two of my own so its like. yeah i get how it feels to worry about it getting damaged or lost #so within the bounds of my ideas linebeck cares about his coat in a similar manner he does his ship. hes autistic abt both of them #his scarf falls into this category too but that actually has more actual backstory about it bc i can’t be normal about anything about him #still talking in the tags. oh well. im going to snap #i have planned a 17 chapter linebeck backstory. this is not related to that but i feel like its worth just. mentioning #i could probably make his coat represent some aspect of his identity if i wanted. like. maybe its a representation of what he really wants #i keep the coat in most au designs but the two au designs that dont have the coat are where linebeck’s identity is a bit fucked

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maerusdream · 7 days

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ATTENTION !!

❛you got me looking

for attentionnn ❜ ©maerusdream

ʬʬʬ. 2024 pairing. ni-ki x nini prompt ; riki being in a scandal + nini ignoring riki , cw. minor jealousy, ( LIBRARY )

Nini did not expect for the first thing she’d wake up to was Weverse messages from engenes tagging every member for an alleged dating scandal revolving around ni-ki & another female idol . Although in a popular group like enhypen it’s not unusual for these to happen & all the members know they’ve done nothing for these to happen it’s just saesangs being crazy.

However why did it bother nini so much that it was ni-ki? maybe she had a slight crush on him but it’s nothing for her to get jealous of but that doesn’t mean her emotions didn’t get the best of her …

“hey dork” riki shouts from the living room,but nini simply looks at him & goes back to her phone . Riki was confused but don’t think much of it as it was the morning & he thought she was just tired .

but to Riki’s dismay it wasn’t just the morning , but the rest of the day that nini ignored riki .

During practice ,their instructor kept reminding nini of the same move she was doing wrong & told her to practice it more .

As time passed & practice came to an end ,nini decided she’d stay longer for that move & told maeru “I’ll be back in around 30 minutes dont worry” with a reassuring smile .

however maeru insisted with atleast one member staying with her . Jake slightly nudged riki to stay as he has been talking abt her ignoring him . “I’ll stay !” riki said enthusiastically.

“alright then but just 30 minutes” maeru said before she & the remaining 6 members left .

nini’s face had shock plastered onto it as she tried to remain calm while being in the same room of the boy she was supposedly ignoring .

“can we talk” were the 3 words needing to put nini in panic .

“yeah sure” she said trying to contain her composure. “whats up?”

“why are you ignoring me ?, did i do soemthing wrong” riki asked abit fustrated .

“noo why would you think tha—”

before she could finish her sentance she was engulfed in a hug with riki,taken off guard she hesitantly put her arms around his waist ,feeling as if he was going to say something and so she was right .

“im really really sorry for what ever ive done i really really dont want to loose you i like you so much as a friend & even more than that..” riki mumbled the last part .

nini was in shock to thr point she couldnt even put together a sentance the only thing she could stutter out was “you like me ??” witha creset shade of scarlet acrosd her face.

“yeah i do although im not really good at showing it , i would like to try if youre up for it?”

Nini was dumbfounded .. “what are you saying ?” she asked still trying to process this .

“can i be your boyfriend?” riki asked

&to his luck nini jumped up & gave a quick peck on his lips whike jumping around chanting “yes yes yes!”

Thats all riki needed to hear before engulfing her in another hug. silence filled the air but it was a comfortable one . Soon then riki spoke up “..so then.. why were you ignoring me again”

And as if on cue nini blushed again before quietly mufling “your.. dating scandal” it was so quiet that riki might of missed it ,but instead he chuckled to himself while shaking his head . “jealous little dork” he muttered.

“i will not hesitate to kick you in the nuts”

©maerusdream

little message ; this is my first post so i apologise for any errors made !!

please do not steal or copy my writing 🫶

©maerusdream 🫶

#enhypen oc #enhypen niki #enhypen oc female #enhypen xreader #enhypen #enhypen jake #enhypen sunghoon #enhypen jay #enhypen heeseung #enhypen sunoo #enhypen jungwon #viral #viralpost #enhypen x reader

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hannahwashington · 2 months

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ALSO IM JUST NOTICING YOUR HEADER IMAGE. I LOVE IT SO MUCH gundham danganronpa and crash bandicoot (is that his name im sorry) real. also btw feel free to talk abt th emountain experience bc i dont think i ever asked yet

YES HIS NAME IS CRASH BANDICOOT ive honestly BEEN waiting for someone to comment on my header it is one of my favourite images ever (thanks @horatios-mom). it's like a sequel to the era when i had lesbian crash bandicoot as my icon. i'm only through the prologue of sdr2 but i have been obsessed with gundham for Years,. i barely know the guy but i love him. i will Know More Soon. and trust i will be So mentally ill about him and also the series. i already Am i am just waiting to finish the games to post about them.

anyway MOUNTAIN EXPERIENCE. OH BOY. where to begin.

let me take you back to a time when a wide-eyed 17 year old Archie got traumatised by a mountain. sit back, relax, and follow along my recounting of an experience i found so horrible, i had to vent by projecting onto my favourite blorbos at the time. Don't worry, I am more than comfortable with sharing this story, and with hindsight know exactly where to direct my anger with what happened.

It's March 2020. I'm in my second-last year of high school. every year my school takes the people in this specific grade to a leadership camp to teach a variety of skills and stuff to prepare them for the next year, when they will be school leaders basically. this leadership camp happens to culminate in a hike up the Drakensberg, where we sleep overnight, then come back down and go back home.

To be Quite frank. I was Very Excited for this trip. the more school-related activities not so much, but getting the chance to hang out with my classmates outside of school and the hike were what excited me. I'm not the most fit person, but i loooove me a good nature walk.

So it's a few days before the hike. they take us out to a bunch of activities and it's pretty fun. we did an adventure park thing and i was in the middle of a massive tarzan fixation so when i went on a giant rope swing i did his iconic yell. there were ziplines. once when i went down a line i forgot to brake and SMACKED into the mattress on the tree. so that was fun. here's the thing though. they made us walk everywhere. and these weren't easy strolls, they were hikes in and of themselves. i can't speak for anyone else, but the days leading up to the hike were PAINFUL. my feet were so fucking sore and we hadn't even gone near the mountain yet.

Then they hit us with the "yeah we're pushing back the hike by a day because it's gonna be pissing buckets tomorrow." which, duh, of course it's gonna be pissing buckets, it's the drakensberg, it's kinda known for that. but also, that means another day of walking, another day of worsening the condition of my feet. i felt like sam from death stranding when you let him walk barefoot everywhere. it's around here where you might start recognising elements from the fic snippets i posted, by the way.

so the next day like the absolute ass he is, the headmaster (who joined us for. some reason) made us hike up a mini-mountain to 'prepare us' or something. he was a horrible person for completely unrelated reasons and this logic is totally and completely backwards. anyway, after THAT nightmare, we went tubing down a nearby river. this WAS fun. i went down the river multiple times even though my feet hurt like shit. i had to get my fleeting joy somewhere during this trip-turned-nightmare. everyone had fun except this one girl who was not lucky at all. at the end of the river there's a small drop and 99% of the time when you get there you fall out of your tube. she was one of these people, and was really unlucky as she ended up cutting her foot on a rock. she had to be pulled out of the river by a few of the boys.

now then you would THINK she would go home because of this. kind of a bad idea to hike up a mountain with a cut up foot. but no, like the madwoman she is, she decides to pull through. i respect her so much for it.

Anyway, next day comes, my feet are basically throbbing so bad it's like my heart practically lived in them, not even to mention the soreness in my legs. again - i was NOT fit. i was so nervous i could barely eat breakfast. i tried to twist it into something positive by being like "tehe i'm going up a mountain like my favourite teenaged blorbs" but it really was Not helping. sooooo we get to the foot of the mountain and get ready to go. a couple of girls left and missed the hike because they had a netball tournament or something. to this day i wonder if they realise Just how lucky they got.

This is the part i remember most vividly. the Worst part. we set off on our mountain adventure, and i repeat this mantra: keep pace with the person in front of you. which goes great for all of two minutes until like a whole five days of walking absolutely nonsensical distances catches up to me and i slow down and down and down until everyone has passed me and oops! i've stopped completely. my legs are Begging to be put out of their misery and i am Rooted To The Spot. to cut a long ass panic attack short eventually someone comes back to pick me back up and Get Me Up This Stupid Mountain. it wasn't sam unfortunately, it was the drama teacher, but he was a pretty cool person and probably most comforting adult there, so perfect to deal with me in that moment.

he tells me about setting little goals for myself, like finding a specific rock and making my way to it. break the whole hike down into thousands of little baby steps. this way, i actually started to make progress, little by little, until we break the tree line. i can't remember if this moment was in the snippets i posted, but i look up and see the rest of my classmates above me, and when they notice us they start whooping and cheering and singing break my stride (which is kinda the theme song of the trip, ngl). i was still kinda in hysterics so i yelled at them to shut up. looking back, i appreciate it so so much. anyways, the drama teacher and i carry on with our baby steps.

when i've calmed down enough i start talking. i can't remember if he told me to talk to get my mind off of things or if i started on my own, but in any case i just start talking. i know specifically i brought up treasure planet - my all time favourite movie - and he told me he hadn't heard of it. another fanfic snippet moment here: i did, in fact, rant to him about midsommar. i remember specifically talking about the daylight horror aspect and how the black bars could've been white instead to emphasise just how bright and sunny the film is. also at some point we passed random people on the road who didn't speak english and for some reason, to this day i still have no idea why, the drama teacher told me that he thinks those dudes were drug smugglers and using the trail to get drugs over the border. anyways.

eventually, after so, so long, we make it to the top. not the end of the hike, far from it, but the vertical climb is over. you see, this specific trail has like two hours of a horrible vertical climb, but after that, it's a basically-flat trail. not that that would make it any easier but anyway, i thought that the worst was over. from our position we could see the rest of the group, who were all resting by a fork in the path - a significant landmark. eventually we catch up to everyone, and if my fic is to be trusted, everyone started clapping and cheering and singing again, this time 500 miles (hardy har). this is one of the only details in the fic where i can't tell whether i made it up or if it's actually based on what happened. when i sat down, guess what, legs wanted to shrivel up and die, what else is new, but what really struck me was that Literally Everyone Was In The Same Position. some were crying. some were staring into space with cold, dead eyes. Nobody was having a good time. how foot-cut girl was even still here was what shocked me the most. again, CUT IN HER FOOT, it was PRETTY SUBSTANTIALLY SIZED. even so she did Not look good.

drama teacher had gone to talk to all the other adults about our (my and the injured girl's) predicament. we were in No position to carry on with the hike. (i'd argue nobody was but i digress). it was a full-blown argument from what i remember, and when the adults tried to talk to us they kept on interrupting each other. one kept trying to offer a way down, but another teacher (who championed this leadership camp btw, to put this into perspective) was Adamant we continue and simply sleep at the closer campsite.

You can probably guess what ended up happening.

The break just honestly made me feel Worse about moving, and my mentality obviously wasn't the best, and i sorta just really started missing home at this point, but i had to keep going. since it was flat this time i could actually keep some sort of pace, though head leadership camp teacher complained whenever i slowed down too much (actual villain of the story in hindsight). eventually we make it to one of the campsites.

Here's how the camps worked. every year the group split into two - boys and girls - and rotated each year on who went to each of the two campsites. one camp was by a river, the other by a cave. so, one year the boys would go to the cave and the girls to the river, and the next year they would switch. this year the girls were supposed to go to the cave. guess what. it's the further camspite - a good extra... i dunno, hour of walking? obviously injured girl and i couldnt do that. issue is, you need a tent to camp riverside - we obviously didnt have one. however someone, an actual god among men brought an extra tent with him. i never spoke to that kid. but he made it so we didn't have to suffer as much. so i hold a sort of affection for him.

so, the group splits and we finally, FINALLY get our chance to rest. properly. let me tell you, river water has never and i mean NEVER felt so good. i think i spent like a solid hour soaking my feet. the boys - who. somehow had energy after all THAT - made a dam out of rocks. one guy was taking pictures. i never took my own pictures of the mountain, even though the view was beautiful. i was in too much pain to care. i took a Single picture related to the hike itself, and i'll share that at the end of this thrilling tale. that evening after dinner, i snacked morosely and watched at least half of happy death day on my phone. maybe an episode of unbreakable kimmy schmidt, though i don't now for sure about that one. injured girl and i shared that extra tent.

oh yeah, and guess what. it ended up pissing buckets during the night. shocker.

anyway the next day comes and the walk back is worse. one of the other teachers decides to use 'tough love' on me - which was basically yelling at me and failing really badly at being encouraging. honestly would have preferred being tossed off the mountain instead because it just made me Very Distressed but anyway. what was nice was that this time for the walk injured girl and i were at the front of the line setting the pace. and also two of the boys, two absolute GENTLEMEN were walking with us and leading us. you know me, i'm a lesbian, but god i could've kissed them for what they did for us. (i did not but you get my point).

surprisingly the vertical climb down was the easiest part. the really, really vertical part anyway - which was mostly near the top. so easy that a few boys raced ahead of the group... and ended up taking a wrong turn and getting lost. more on them later. when we dipped into the treeline it felt like we were so close yet so far, SO close to ending this suffering, but every single turn without the tar road in sight made me fall deeper and deeper into despair. i think i literally yelled out "MERCY!" at some point. anyway when we did finally get to the road i started crying as we made our way back to the bus that would take us home.

everyone started taking showers, blessed, cold showers at the public bathrooms, and washing myself of the whole experience felt Wonderful. except it wasn't quite done insulting me just yet.

So. the day before we put our suitcases in the bus that would take us home. what they neglected to tell us was that we needed Everything we'd need for that day and the following day on our person. which means they wouldn't be taking our bags out of the bus, not even if we REALLY needed something. i didn't have my flip flops on me. i had put the shoes i had hiked in away (and also they were like sopping wet which is disgusting). it was hot as fuck and the parking lot outside was all gravel. i had to walk in that barefoot.

insult to injury.

i got myself ice cream. tried not to cry. we all had to wait for like half an hour as the lost boys made their way back to us (i can't remember if a teacher had to go back onto the path to find them or not). borrowed drama teacher's flip flops which were hilariously oversized. and then, literally RIGHT as everyone was boarding the bus to leave. i whip out my phone and grab the one and only picture i have related to the hike itself.

it was a long drive back to my home province. i put on some music, cuddled my pillow and tried to sleep. i mostly just tried not to sob. out of pain, relief, anguish - whatever. since it was a long drive, we stopped at a strip mall that's a really common sort of stopping station for people doing drives like this, such as to use the bathroom. another school happened to be pulled up as we stopped by here, and a girl gave me the filthiest, most judgmental look i have EVER seen because i was barefoot. i honestly don't blame her.

it was dark by the time we got back to the school. i did, in fact, cry when i saw my family. the very next day - no exaggeration, i'm 99% sure it was the VERY next day - it was announced that schools would be closing and the country would be going into lockdown due to covid. which means i got to spend the next, like, two weeks recovering instead of thinking about school. i think one of the days after i got back i watched interstellar. i was on a bit of a sci-fi kick. it was okay.

here's that picture i took outside the bus before we left for home.

people Did see me take this. a couple of my classmates made jokes about how they relate and at least one gave me a high five.

anyway, that's the story of my Mountain Experience™. again, more than comfortable sharing this story as i think it's quite important with understanding me and we know who to blame for putting us through this. i've had chats with other alumni who came before me and they had their Own nightmarish experiences with this camp, which makes me wonder how it continued being a thing for so long.

#ask #queerkearney #answered #my writing #biographical this time :)#kiddo's mountain experience #mutuals :)

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actualbird · 2 years

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analysis: SSR Under The Milky Way, luke pearce, and dichotomies that make him a wonderfully contradictory mess of a character and make this love story one i really adore

(wow, thats a mouthful of a title. cuz this is a mouthful of a post)

wc: 2.7k

obligatory disclaimer that these are just my own thoughts and interpretations. spoilers for up to luke's personal story 4, his anniv card obviously, and other cards here and there too

luke is a mess

hes Such a Mess. i dont mean this in the "physical space organization" tho that is hilariously canon (pls whenever we're in the 2nd floor of his building i cant stop focusing on the papers on the floor, one of them literally under the leg of the table, MY MAN PICK UP UR FILES JHSDVFKJSDH), but i mean it in the emotional sense. and i also mean it so lovingly, cuz it's among the many things i love abt his character. hes so messy, he has so many character traits that i'd classify as flaws and faults that make him interesting to endlessly rotate in my brain, hes SUCH A MESS IN SO MANY WAYS and he even says this outright in his personal story 3 as a general statement

and after i read his personal story 4 and then his anniv card, his mess was at the forefront of my brain because it ultimately made his anniv card So Satisfying in terms of scratching certain story itches ive got, in terms of addressing his emotional messiness thru the crux of his romantic relationship with mc

and i'll get to that in different portions of this post. but first, i wanna lay down one by one what causes his mess; dichotomies in how he thinks and how mc acts as the other side as the narrative foil, and how all this adds up to a love story i really, really love

inevitability vs. hope

i’ll start with the most obvious one. ever since luke’s personal story 1 allllll the way up to this anniv card, the inevitability of his illness and his limited lifespan prognosis looms over and informs the decisions he makes. which, yknow, makes sense. thats a Heavy Thing to have to deal with, and luke for a large amount of his story doesnt want this to be anybody else’s problem but his exactly Because it’s heavy. it’s sad and upsetting and causes worry, and ever since luke was a kid, he was already beginning to harbor a guilt for hurting other people or bringing bad upon their lives (mentioned and shown in SSR Shape Of You)

even after personal story 4—after he’s made the decision to tell mc the whole truth—he is still convinced of this inevitability. hes so convinced that he sent the letter and skedaddled elsewhere to give mc time and space to think it all through without being clouded by the heat of the moment.

hes so convinced that once mc confesses back to him, he argues with her (sidenote: my GOD getchu a love interest who, in the Confession Card, is literally trying so hard to get the main character to pick ANYBODY BUT HIM because he thinks it’d hurt less. my heart aches SO MUCH). he throws the inevitability of his death in her face, as if to scare her away.

while the whole inevitability thing is so obvious in luke like, Everywhere in his thoughts and stories, i also realized it’s subliminally communicated through even the settings and symbols that are linked to him.

luke runs an antique shop, he’s into photography and takes pictures as memories, he’s got his treasure box filled with things from the past, he’s Always bringing up fond anecdotes of his and mc’s childhood: all of these are things have the concept of the passage of time intrinsic to them, and time passing to luke is something that brings his inevitability closer and closer. so all these symbols implying time are also focused on the past specifically, when things were happier because he’s sure his future can only cause pain.

and mc, of course, is the foil to inevitability. first, she focuses on a portion of time that isnt past or future: the present.

in luke’s personal story 4 when aaron not so subtly grills her about “dangerous professions” of somebody she loves, she says this:

and then when you pick the second choice here in the anniv card (which i did), she says the following lines

while there’s still time, she says.

this sentiment from mc doesnt just crop up here. cherishing the present is something she brings up many times across several stories (off the top of my head: SR Radiant Sunlight and luke’s personal story 2 during that whole story with Zero) and it’s clear that to her, yes, the past and the future are important, the former being a time none of them can return to and the latter being filled with uncertainty, but now matters so much as well. maybe it matters even more, taking into account how uncertain tomorrow will be.

the second thing mc brings to face luke’s inevitability shtick is related to uncertainty: hope.

luke’s prognosis is dire, but as long as he’s alive now in the present, theres still a chance. theres still hope. going back to that scene in luke’s personal story 4 where aaron is grilling mc, she says:

and then immediately after this she cites wedding vows which luke secretly overhears outside still holding the fucking kettle, oh my GOD, i CANNOT TAKE THESE TWO…

back on topic tho, this bit shows that mc’s view of the uncertainty of a future with a lover in constant danger (and “constant danger” in this specific scene is in regards to luke’s job, yeah, but also has pretty obvious parallels to his illness as well: pain can and will happen) skews towards something more balanced than luke’s concept of inevitability. her view is more of like…we can’t ever be sure. and that doesn’t just make space for pain, but it makes space for hope too.

and this view isnt only for his illness to be treated, but for his and mc’s relationship as well.

which brings me to this line, the line that Broke Me and also made me think “OKAY EVERYBODY, PACK IT UP, GO HOME, THE WINNER OF BEST CONFESSION IS NONE OF THE BOYS, IT’S ACTUALLY MC!!!” this is what she says:

i know, it seems simple at first but listen. Listen. this is….so good and so perfect for them. this line has two key parts, the verb and the subjects, and i first wanna talk about the verb: believe.

belief is not rooted on things that are sure. believing in something, anything, is acknowledging there are things that cant be controlled or fully known but taking that chance anyway. belief is faith, belief is hope, and these things as a cornerstone for love is so important to luke/mc cuz it shows how much they matter to each other and that uncertainties arent a dealbreaker but a call to hope and believe and love. mc believes and pleads luke to believe too, believe in her and in them together

which now brings me to the next dichotomy

luke vs. mc

luke, when bringing up his fear of inevitable grief hurting mc, words his feelings in a very particular way. in the anniv card, he says

worded another way, this could go “i could follow my heart, but at the cost of her happiness.”

this is what he thinks the price of his happiness is: mc’s own. and it’s indicative of something i noticed about luke wayyy back in lost gold, that he has the habit of pitting him and mc against each other, particularly his desires against mc’s emotions.

if he is to indulge in what will give him joy, he will rob mc of hers. if he is to value his life, he will ruin mc’s life (actually to bring up SSR Shape Of You again (SORRY IT RLLY IS JUST SUCH A FAVE CARD OF MINE) this is taken further to the (past childhood) implication of like…if he even just exists, he will ruin mc’s life). if he “wins”, she “loses”

this kind of thinking is cuz he is still, up till now—even after he had said in personal story 4 that he said that the secrets he’s got concerns them both—not seeing himself and mc as a team. he’s seeing himself and mc as two people on different sides and only one of them can get out of this with their heart intact.

and of course, as is usual with luke pearce, he’d always rather the winner to be her.

so now i wanna go back to mc’s line which Broke Me™. “You have to believe in me…In us.” awhile ago i was talking about the verb but now i shift to the subject.

mc wants luke to believe in her, which is already in itself something that would hit luke emotionally. afterall, every single argument hes saying is supposedly for her own good, yet he also told her that he’d respect whatever her decision was. if he really, truly does love her, she should listen to her, trust her, and believe in her. going further, she wants him to believe in her and him together.

because thats what a relationship is supposed to be, even a platonic one and doubly so for a romantic one. the people are still individuals, yes, but theyre not on different teams, theyre not supposed to be with one more important than the other, theyre supposed to be side by side as equals, together.

in the verb and subjects of “You have to believe in me…In us.”, mc asks luke to rethink inevitability and indulge in faith, she asks him get rid of the divide he’s put between them that says both of them being happy is impossible.

and in response to this, luke says “...I do.”

cue kiss scene of the anniv card. of course, the crowd cheers, crowd goes wild (the crowd is me) as they kiss. it is so SO satisfying because these two things that luke has struggled with are met with an equal and kinder force coming from mc. the buildup is sublime and crests towards this moment and it is so sweet and tender and amazing.

and then luke’s self-deprecation busts through the wall again. which brings me to the last dichotomy

“how can i ask anyone to love me” vs. “when all i do is beg to be left alone”

the prior dichotomies all had luke as one side and mc as the other, but this last one is different. these are both two sides within only luke and i wanna talk about it not through narrative foils but through the lens of how characters change.

but first lemme explain: the above bits in the quotation marks are lyrics from the song Left Alone by Fiona Apple and theyre really neat lyrics that succinctly articulate a super common contradictory experience, one luke lays out in full with his depressing explanation for his depressing song choice for the music box

after he says all this, mc reassures luke that she loves him and understands that his contradictory actions we are stemming not from cowardice but from the fact he loves and cares about her (and that it all just got mucked up with mixed signals and actions like this because of //gestures at aforementioned two dichotomies). and mc is right wonderful, i love that, shes wonderful!!

but what im drawn to here though is less of the resolution of this issue but the fact that this speech from luke made me realize one thing ive adored about his character ever since the beginning: because of his love manifesting into contradictory desires, he not only goes through character development, but moments of character regression as well. he not only changes for the better, but he has moments where he backslides and relapses into old bad habits.

“why, zak, why do you love this in a character??? are you a SADIST???” yeah, i am. but i do also have valid reasons JHVJKSHDVFS.

on a personal level, i find it’s more realistic and genuine as to how stuff happens with real people. i cant speak for everyone, but as somebody with [redacted mental bad times], seeing a character have moments of going back to bad habits feels great to me cuz in real life, the road of recovery or being a better person isnt always linear. sometimes it’s like this, it’s 1 step forward, 1 step back.

on a story level though, character development and character regression both happening does two things:

1) it highlights just how strong the motives and rationale of the old ways are, which increases the depth of the character and their traits

like, luke has several regression moments in the anniv card alone. first one is one he mentions, he said he’d accept whatever mc’s decision was but his first instinct that he Did act on was to argue with her because it is so ingrained in him to think of her choosing him as the Wrong choice to make, the choice that will lead her to sadness, and he loves her so much that he doesnt want her to go through that.

another smaller backslide moment is that he Runs Away in this card. remember luke’s xmas partyland card, SR A Star in the Palm? the card luke word for word tells mc “I promise that from now and forever, I’ll never try to run from you ever again.”? well, while luke explains in his anniv card his rationale for lying to mc that he’s out of town the moment he sends the letter, that rationale doesnt trump the fact that he still ran away and gave her no information on how to find him (thank u aaron for immediately fessing luke’s location, god bless)

also, he lied to her. ding ding ding, pretty sure he said he’d stop doing that!!! but him running and lying once again highlights how much he once thought his absence in mc’s life would be better for her, he has to be Not There when she reads the letter so his presence doesnt lead her into a choice thatd result in her sadness.

the second thing character development and character regression both happening does is

2) ensures change

brief segue, but for the longest time, i had always known that i personally get bored with perfect characters. characters who always succeed, who never doubt, and whose flaws (if theyve got any) are largely minimal and do not affect the story. and only when i started writing this analysis did i realize why i get bored with perfect characters: there’s nowhere else to go for them.

if theyre perfect, they wont backslide. and if theyre perfect, they cant get any better because theyve already Gotten There. theyre stagnant, and what i personally love to see in stories, among many other things, is a character changing.

luke is so flawed and imperfect and this delights me to no end. his faults ensure theres room for him to improve, and he does. he makes promises, he changes for the better. and once hes done that, theres space for him to regress and fuck up all over again, which emphasizes his traits, beliefs, and what matters to him.

and once hes a step back, theres space for him to take a step forward again because if theres one thing so sublimely clear about luke, it’s that he tries. he keeps on fighting even if it looks like an impossible fight, and in this card, he does this because he loves mc, because he believes in her, because he believes in them together.

so. luke is a mess for so many reasons, and to me, that makes him one hell of an interesting character with some fantastic stories. it makes his and mc’s love story one that focuses on hope, togetherness, and change.

and these kinds of stories, messy ones that have room for characters to fail and also have room for characters to get better, are ones that i really love a whole bunch.

#tears of themis #luke pearce #tot luke #lukerosa #tears of themis analysis

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upsidedowngrass · 1 year

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Charlotte post NOW (/j only if u want!!)

AHHH charlotte jumpscare!!!!!!!

im not sure what SPECIFICALLY to post abt her bc this ask is a little vague, BUT i do think abt her a lot!!! tho i DO gotta think about her more, she is a WONDERFUL character

bc idk what specifically, my interpretation of her post canon and WHY (also under a readmore because WOW!! i had apparently a lot to say abt her):

i think!!! she is a LOT more mellow after she gets home. like in one 16 after shes respawned its like. she seems to be friendlier? which. i think has to do w like... i dont think she was a bad person really, and i dont think shed been acting Maliciously, but when it came to having friends i think it was really easier for her to genuinely take things as worst as they could be. we dont actually get much of her backstory, so its up to interpretation as to WHY, but i think she genuinely struggled with being distrustful of those close to her. she likes them, that much is clear, but trusting people is a whole other thing

but i think she really DID view her friends as pitying her. as not respecting her, even when they werent Being cruel. they were concerned for her safety, and how her recklessness was affecting her. and i think that can end up walking a line between pity and not wanting your friends to do things that are pretty unambiguously dangerous, and what was very standard friendship ended up feeling a lot MORE like they didnt respect her or her choices

and i think what changes this is that. she DID die. and i think that contextualized for her that her friends werent concerned because they thought she couldnt handle herself, but because they just Generally care abt her yknow? as fucked up as her dying is, i think it did ultimately make her realize that THIS is what her friends were worried about. they didnt want THIS to happen to her, and i think in an odd way? it kinda made her. idk understand? trust? the people around her more. like in a 'oh, people around me dont only care about me for selfish reasons, or cruel reasons. they care because they CARE' way

and i think that, and the fact that she says that shed been thinking about this a lot? i feel like it kinda all forced her to slow down and WANT to talk to the people around her. because shed been pushing them all away because what was the point in talking to them? and i think once she REALLY noticed how amelia was doing, after thinking so much about all this, it kinda MADE her want to amend things. or at the very least, to talk to people more. shes isolated herself long enough, and its now more than ever that she realizes how much others meant to her in the first place.

(i think in some aspects, amelias method of coping also bothered her. amelias coping mechanisms werent necessarily BAD, theyre not good by real-world standards, but given the situation shes in, it was just... once of the few ways she COULD cope. but i think the flaws in this method of coping really came through once airy came back, because in forgetting everything about who she used to be, earth became a very daunting place, but now that airys back, any amount of feeling like home the plane may have unfortunately gained was completely undone. and i think charlotte actually SEES that, and its not the exact same as her own struggles, but i think she WANTS to help amelia, because she of all people knows how the feeling of being isolated, either on purpose or accident, can feel Extremely Awful. that, and she knew amelia before things on the plane got REALLY bad, and she SAW (since ive seen people note that she!!! was watching amelia do yoga w the others) amelia gradually give up, become comfortable, and then LOSE all of that

and i think, at least right before bryce showed up, it felt fucked up that charlotte WAS the only other person from the same world as amelia and theyd!!! never even spoken about it??? (like how she comments that they NEVER told each other their names. which only applies to her and amelia. that statement was intended very specifically towards amelia) and its like. i think it mightve made her a bit 'no WONDER shes not doing well. even if shes trying to act like she is' (which i dont even think amelia is doing to deflect so much as an attempt at 'if i pretend its ok it WILL be ok right?'))

and!!! once getting home i think this would all really lead her to be a bit more patient with others. i dont think the distrust would STOP being an issue, but i think such a terrible experience causing her to completely recontextualize the actions of those around her would actually help, at least a little . i dont actually know if i think shed stay friends w parker and that friend group, but i think theyd at the least keep in touch. parker clearly, even when they were arguing, STILL cared about her, and i think seeing her disappear probably was. a bit haunting, and so i think at the very least hed like to know shes Okay

also whenever people have the characters live together post canon, they only ever include bryce liam and amelia, and i GET why!!! charlotte didnt really interact w them for a looong time. but after charlotte is revived i actually see her as talking with them yknow? i dont think shed stop talking to them again, and i think her talking with amelia was a genuine attempt to help!! so i think theyd stick together. i dont imagine liam actually gets closer with any of the contestants while hes trying to send them home (tho i dont think it worsens substantially either. i think it just sorta. stays where it is? and if he did have notable interactions with any of them, itd PROBABLY be mainly w amelia and bryce, tho i dont think he DOESNT talk to charlotte too! he just has a diff sort of connection w those to, based on the experiences he Shared w them) so i think he isnt SUPER close w charlotte, but i think the others may become WAY closer w her!!! so i think if they all moved in together? that WOULD include charlotte!!! (that, and i think charlotte would also develop a sort of respect for liam . because he kinda DOES display exactly the type of traits she didnt really see people as having!!! going to EXTREME lengths to help people, including HER! so i think shed generally have many thoughts on him)

anyway !!! thats it the point is that as much as one would fuck charlotte up in her own way, i think, similar to how bryce tried to get his life together after he was first eliminated, shed similarly end up having a better ability to navigate social stuff in not such a pessimistic way as before!!!!!

#hfjone #one is a series abt the complexities of isolation man........#how people create it and how people respond to it #i also have many thoughts on what one is abt but . theres such a theme of isolation #(also? its been a longstanding idea ive had that like #charlotte and bryce both mellow out more after one #while liam and amelia both become a bit more easily agitated #NOT that charlotte and bryce wouldnt have their own problems but like #i think BECAUSE these two were in a shittier place that made them rethink stuff #while liam and amelia were doing okay and abruptly had everything ruined #would make charlotte AND bryce actually a bit Better at Navigating things specifically #and i think charlotte and bryce are meant to somewhat reflect back amelia and liam actually #and are meant to show the different ways awful experiences affect people #DUNNO. i think i could put these four on a chart and liam and amelia would be on a diff side from bryce and charlotte #based on the general Way that one affected them #but then liam and bryce would be on a diff side from amelia and charlotte too based on their experiences in a more literal way #if that makes sense #though i think liam AND charlotte ALSO share in their stubbornness and amelia nd bryce in a desire to Let Go of things #so itd be a complex chart #ask

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piduai · 1 year

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back in 2021 when i was studying to get into college i would stalk your acc everyday i kinda developed a parasocial relationship with fr sorry girl i just enjoyed your strong opinions and ur sense of humour anyway a year later i actually got into college i am doing what i wanted and all and for some reason i thought it somehow would fix all of my lonely problems but it didnt. ive always been weird but more than ever i dont think i can hide it anymore, i try being normal sooo hard but i feel like everyone can see through my act and they get weirdedout, like they can see that i am trying so hard when to them is so natural and the only girl i kinda made acquaitance with is thinking abt leaving so idk what to do. i truly envy normal people, i take no pride in being different i would trade all of my "uniquiness" to be able to fit in this world fr. sorry for venting, i remember you had a post kind of giving tips on how to ""survive" college but i cant seem to be able to find it. anyway thanks queen keep your head up.

congrats on getting into college, especially if it's something you like doing! i hope your academic career is going smoothly.

if you're in your second year of college you're what, early 20s? being 21 is as bad as being 14 but now you can legally take out a loan. being a weird loner at 21 is ^2 that. i think a lot of lonely teenagers have this college fantasy where they'll finally become social butterflies once they get their psych 101 schedule, but it's rarely the case; people don't change overnight. what i'm trying to say is that it's normal and fine even to feel that way - the disappointment, the frustration, the feeling of something lacking and of losing out. you're in a transactional period, not fully grown into your brain, so it's rather normal to feel bottomless despair in your situation. a lot of your problems will pass with age.

i can relate to your "i wish i was normal" bit so bad. a lot of boring losers on here who haven't stepped a toe out of normalcy their entire lives will talk about being proud weirdos because they play dungeons and dragons and have a porn addiction. god's #real strongest warriors know that there's nothing worse than deviating from the norm, a life of alienation you feel down to the bones. even if you mask exceptionally well and manage to blend in it doesn't go away, you know that you're abnormal and are the odd one out, and struggling with things that come naturally to the majority is downright humiliating. when i was younger i used to resent all of this, i resented not being like other people, resented being unable to be like everyone else, resented having to invest excruciating effort to not stand out like a sore thumb. but eventually you just have to come to terms with it, accept that there's something wrong with you, something that makes you different from most people you'll meet casually, and live with it. once you don't hate yourself for it anymore all you have to do is remember the scripts to follow during regular meaningless interactions and you're peachy. weird people have always existed, you're not the first or the last one, and they lived somehow so we can manage too.

and i know that the self-consciousness makes you think that everyone can sniff you out like a hound but the truth is that most people don't really care about you, they have their own lives to worry about. and it's a good thing, great in fact! if you just exist quietly but try to blend in (as in, don't behave in erratic or abnormal ways and don't create trouble) THE meanest thing people will passingly may think of you is "oh she's a bit awkward/shy/unfriendly" like i promise you those around you don't secretly look at you and go like... wtf.... look at that FREAK walking here..... gross..... because they simply don't care. like i think that strangers are much more benevolently indifferent than we're giving them credit for.

as for practical advice you never asked for, the good old "go to a place many times and you'll meet someone" method typically works. actually the best would be to join some sport of your liking, it doesn't have to be like, competitive or anything, swimming or badminton are good. but if you're bad at that maybe try chiller hobbies, like maybe your uni has some kind of clubs? anime/manga clubs, reading clubs, whatever you like. usually the people you meet at those particular clubs suck, but it kind of works like lesbian dating - they can introduce you to their friends, which can be nice encounters. there's also the option of frequently volunteering at events or getting a part-time job, stuff like bartending can introduce you to a lot of young people, especially if you're in a student town, but barista/waitressing can work too.

the problem with all of the above is that it does require you to be proactive, which is i think a difficult feature if your sense of self is fluctuating and you're being eaten alive by shame/self-doubt/self-hatred/insecurity. it's very hard to live that way. first and foremost you need to stand solid on who you are, to learn to accept your own quirks, to accept that you have to put up with hardships others will never know, and to respect yourself. different doesn't mean worse, or even bad. you're not a bad person. bad people don't have this kind of thoughts, they live life guilt free while demeaning and stomping on others. so even if you're a bit unusual you're still a decent person, you're deserving of dignity and respect and kindness, of good things, of connection, of love. meaningful encounters are rare, but they happen! keep searching, there is no other way. there are other people like you. i wish you the best of luck!

#anon

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poryphoria · 1 year

Text

mbbgg crackpot psychoanalysis time

ive seen a startling amount of people who just straight up Don't know who he is which is like kinda understandable when he doesn't show up in the animations but at the same time he has a full fledged bossfight in project nexus so * shrug *

but in effect i think his forgettability is a thing in-universe, too. he gets mike wazowski'd out of pictures of all 3 head scientists. people recognize & remember christoff n hofnarrs work all the time but if you ask them about the enmeshment program they just kinda.....?? so sorry?? or at best it's like a "oh, that? did that ever even go anywhere? sounded crazy lol idk how that even got approved"

i think his rivalry with christoff was super one-sided. it was everything to him but moreso a footnote annoyance to christoff. i kinda think abt the fact that christoff came back to nexus city, had every opportunity to have some sort of confrontation or final showdown with him like to "settle the score", and just Did Not. bc he was busy. with more important things

he has the ADHD cycle syndrome of "OH!! IM GONNA START ON THIS PROJECT AND ITLL BE AWESOME!!" -> "OK SUDDENLY I DONT FEEL LIKE WORKING ON THIS ANYMORE" -> "WHAT IF I STARTED A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT THING INSTEAD" and that's why he never really got much done or is known for much. he was only really able to stick with the enmeshment program out of sheer spite for christoff and everyone else who thought it was insane

he has really awful anxiety that both feeds into and stems from all of this- he's afraid of bothering people and avoids asking for things if he can help it, so most of the time he just kinda fades into the background and keeps to himself. it kinda leads to this self perpetuating cycle of misery.

in general i like to think he was the youngest of the science team (only in his 40s at the time of joining nexus while hofnarr & christoff were closer to their 60s and 50s, respectively) nd like they're all adults by then who know better than to act like highschoolers, but it did sort of impact the way people treated him a little. like people just assumed he didn't have as much experience or was in over his head or didn't automatically know as much as everyone else

all of this also probably fed into autism related anger issues where he just had a tendency to snap at people and in general over completely benign things, n coupled with his Everything Else it kinda just made people. not wanna be around him.

he's emotionally constipated and can barely get a sentence out about the way he feels abt things without breaking down into tears and then the fact that he's crying over nothing frustrates him and he starts crying harder and then. well. you understand

overall he's just an incredibly world weary, drained person who is constantly being spoken over, forgotten and left behind to me and who leaps like a tick at any slight suggestion of attention or praise.

post-nexus, i think he behaves so differently bc he's finally just snapped over years of being a nobody and is fully dedicated to gouging himself into people's memory. he's super loud and flashy & flamboyant (flambuoyant?) and demands to be worshipped and praised and revered! he acts almost solely on impulse & intrusive thoughts and has to keep moving constantly and never stops to second-guess and refuses to be burdened by fears and worries.

hes my babygirl i have a lotta thoughts about him. i like picking his brain apart

#pory turgles #madcom #madness combat #madness project nexus #project nexus #dr crackpot #dr. crackpot

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br1ghtestlight · 6 months

Text

20 questions for fic writers

1. How many works do you have on Ao3

2. What’s your total word count?

109,996

3. What fandoms do you write for?

bob's burgers, inanimate insanity and there's like one steven universe fic in there. i have written for other fandoms in the past but not on that account lol (and mostly unpublished)

4. Top 5 fics by kudos

zeke running away fic, genderfluid gene fic, louise hat fic, bob mom fic, tinimmy week fic (the problem with naming all my fanfics after really long complicated song lyrics is that i simply will not actually call the fanfictions by their Actual Name. also not linking them bcuz im lazy)

5. Do you respond to comments?

i always try to respond to comments but tbh people dont comment on my work very often?? i also dont reply to comments on my old account bcuz i dont have access to it anymore

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

i dont know if ive ever written anything angsty tbh?? thats not really my favorite thing because it makes me too sad. out of my published fanfics probably the fic about bob's mom wins by default and out of my unpublished wips uhh maybe my louise and tina focused fanfic. it has a happy ending (maybe) but its a real downer at times. or maybe my tinimmy fic is bittersweet depending on how you read it

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

maybe my fanfic where bob gets a garden LMAO or my genderfluid gene fic

8. Do you get hate on fics?

no!!! actually a secret about me in that my almost 10 years posting art fanfics etc online i have never gotten a single negative comment on anything ive made. i feel very lucky :)

9. Do you write smut?

never have and never will (nothing wrong with it in most contexts but im asexual and smut is extremely Not My Thing. i actually tried writing a smut fic once to challenge myself a few years ago and spent like 1000 words describing the way the candles were lit in their bedroom before i realized its simply not for me and thats fine)

10. Do you write crossovers?

no but if my hyperfixations ever gave me an opportunity to crossover maybe?? any bob's burgers character on the infinity train would be hilarious. any hfjone character would be heartbreaking

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

i dont remember but im gonna go with probably not

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

nope

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

NO I THINK IT WOULD BE REALLY FUN but im too much of a perfectionist w/ my writing and i would be worried about dragging the other person down with me. maybe if my ocd ever gets medicated idk

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

it depends on my mood but right now i have been thinking abt tina and jimmy jr a lot. not even romantically their relationship is just so interesting. jimmy jr/zeke/tina is also great. marshall lee and gary.... bryce and liam??

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

i have like over 30+ wips so thats probably a lot of them FJDMDMSJSKS something i would love to finish at some point but probably never will is a fanfic about how bob and linda overcame the cycle of abuse with their own childhood memories vs how they are with their kids. maybe i could write that with somebody else and we each do like a chapter at a time (they write linda's memories and i write bob's etc)

16. What are your writing strengths?

people always tell me that im really good at capturing character's voices and personalities and making them feel in character?? i always want my stories to feel like something that could actually happen in-universe and make it make sense with the characters etc. i think part of this comes from working w/ my own ocs and thinking so hard about how different people express and communicate things and then applying that to other characters is easy. and bcuz of how my autism works i can memorize how a person or character constructs sentences and create new sentences inside my head in their voice :D i really pay attention to peoples speaking patterns & how they phrase things

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

probably how perfectionist i am about grammar and using certain words phrases punctuation etc that it takes FOREVER to get anything done. i also think im too wordy. i can turn a fifteen word sentence into a fifty word sentence easily which is great for essays but kinda annoying when you're reading a silly bobs burgers fanfic

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language?

i dont mind doing it for my ocs but to my knowledge none of the bob's burgers characters speak another language as their native language?? so i cant see it coming up in anything i write

19. First fandom you wrote for?

i dont really wanna say bcuz its embarrassing and i was pretty young LMAO but it was like youtuber fanfic on wattpad (wayy before whatever youtubers you're thinking of they were never famous)

20. Favorite fic you’ve ever written?

hmm either my tinimmy week fic or my genderfluid gene fic it changes depending on the day. right now its my tinimmy week fanfic <3

#txt #bob's burgers #long post #<- im assuming

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kuroimarzipan · 1 year

Note

To return the ask I was unable to answer for you: I'd love to hear your Kingmaker thoughts! Or Wrath, if you'd prefer.

HELP I MISCLICKED BEFORE I WROTE ANYTHING AND HAD TO EDIT THE POST LMFAO anyway im gonna answer for kingmaker only tonight cause i gotta go to bed and i spent too long writing shit out but i might reblog this and add answers for wotr on after work tomorrow lol

Favorite Male Character okay so i could be normal about this. i could. or i could let everyone here know that i mentally put together multiple AUs where esteem got together with dragn after witnessing like three lines of dialogue. yea the smith guy. the one without a portrait even.

BUT if i had to be more normal about it then its gotta be ekun. i just want that guy to be happy and i really enjoy how weirdly well he gets along with esteem. also he's like. the most ruthless good character ive seen in a while which i really find interesting. makes a great minister too. he just has this reassuring presence in your party like hes got your back you dont have to worry. also: dogy :^)

Favorite Female Character

okay so i went into this game assuming kanerah would be my fave and i was like. ready to finally not have to headcanon a romance and shit. and then this bitch named valerie came along. and oh my god she's such a piece of work. so principled. so hypocritical. so abrasive and easy to rile up. she's loyal because she's decided to be loyal. she turns on you for wanting to kill a guy early in act 2 and then turns BACK on him because he hits on her. she doesnt even realise shes gay. ever since she killed fredero because esteem pushed her to do it ive been thinking about it. ive not read the dialogue for her canon straight romance or whatever because honestly i dont care whatever the fuck im doing to her in my head is way more interesting to me. ive done all the stuff for her hellknight ending and im very excited heehee.

Least Favorite Character

kingmaker is interesting in that i had a really poor first impression of a LOT of the companions, but after having gotten to know them, i... honestly dont rlly hate any of them?? there's still a few companions that end up benchwarming for me bc i just like others more, but its really not been like wotr where the party lineup was so polarising for me lmao

WAIT I JUST REMEMBERED JHOD. fuck that guy. i dont even have a particular actually good reason either. i just think his vibes are rancid

Favorite Ship

specifically that moment when hegend drew his weapon and went to attack valerie and the moment combat initiated esteem hit him with the chains of light which was followed by a maximised empowered magma blast from kanerah which one shot him. that felt good

aside from that i kinda wanna see amiri and nilak reconcile at some point??

Favorite Friendship

i like that ekun the complete and utter loner was the person that taught esteem how to actually have friends instead of just manipulating people into appreciating her. i like to think he figured that out by the time his last quest rolled around. they have this kinda silent trust.

Favorite Quote

this was such a good moment to me specifically because of the circumstances of esteem having been chased out of its home because of what it is and then having tartuk tell it that it would never understand?? it was COLD AS ICE telling him that before dealing the killing blow and taking his crown. defining moments tbh

Worst Character Death (if any)

i have a feeling this is yet to come for me 🙃

This made me so happy you have no idea Moment

maybe its silly but thee loyalty these two have hehehe

Saddest Moment

TBH another thing i think is yet to come for me.... i know that last act is gonna hit hard

Favorite Location

the swamp witch's hut... i actually really love the old beldame and all the lil storylines going on in that map so so much it rlly helped me solidify a bunch of important things abt esteem's backstory too lol

#ask meme #replies #i wanted to answer for wotr as well but i have work tomorrow :^(#esteem #long post #pfkm

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jackienautism · 9 months

Note

Saw your latest post and I just want to add that the people who do ship Charlie/Du'met are some of the most toxic people I've seen in SMG fandom. If you dare to bring up the issues with their ship (Especially in the way it overtakes the WOC wlw ship AND the other interracial ship) they'll attack you about it 💀

And not only do they act like this (most of the time) but the fact that they're more willing to ship a man with the guy who is TRYING TO KILL HIM AND HIS EMPLOYEES over the actual romantic relationships in the game is insane to me. People will ship the most horrendously toxic mlm ship before even thinking about the canon wlw ship and it's infuriating. Funny thing is I liked Charlie just fine before but these people are making me hate him lmao

Sorry if i'm rambling I just have a LOT of thoughts on this ship

Oooooh yeah that's not surprising to me 😭 of course the shippers of an inherently bad pairing are going to bad themselves LMAO so sorry if youve ever had to deal w/ any of them in that way :/ i remember seeing something happen under a mutuals post (lazylesbianbear hiii) and its just.... things really start to show when they get SO defensive over someone giving (well deserved, mind you) criticism for their pairing. it sucks that they attack over something like that bc it shows how guilty they are lmao. it shows that they truly and honestly dont care abt those issues OR the fact that their ship is overtaking erin / jamie and mark / kate (who i totally forgot were a pairing for a sec. sorry mark and kate) aka 2 pairings that are LEAGUES above whatever charlie / dumet is. what im saying is, they dont give a fuck abt poc or women, even if they try their best to "prove" it

IT IS INSANE !!!!! AND ITS SOOO SAD..... we already get jack shit in terms of representation (both wlw and interracial relationships) so of course its gonna suuuuck so bad when the most popular pairing is some serial killer and his victim. but i suppose i expect nothing less of fandom :/ and you're right, they'll gravitate towards the worst / most lackluster mlm pairing before ever even considering a wlw one, let alone w/ woc. and its so disappointing. sorry that these ppl have made you dislike charlie a lot more than before though. ive experienced the same shit so you're def not alone in that

and no no worries! you're def not rambling, all of your points are super valid and deserve to be talked about. if you ever have more to say, even though i have not played the game yet, my inbox / messages are always open. hope you have a good day!

#mine #text #asks #anon #the devil in me #my thoughts #[emma mountebank voice] ok :) i’m done #TDIM

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princemick · 9 months

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I'm sorry you got attacked by some fans some of them are normal people I swear. I have no problem with people throwing hate at Max and yes I also like Lewis because I focus on what I feel and do as a fan. I think everyone should know what to do to make the community less toxic and I see rude fans on both sides.

You are an amazing content creator and seem a nice person. The only criticism I have is that sometimes you put yourself in the position of "owner of the fanbase"? Sometimes it sounds like you speak for us all when it's not the case.

I'm sure a lot of people on social media act in certain ways to feel welcomed and make friends but in the end we are different individuals that shouldn't be judged as one. This can go for the situation with the Max fans on your post too.

Again I'm sorry you got attacked no one deserves this.

hiya, I'm gonna, try and be nice but this genuinely confused me. but first absolutely now worries i wasn't really attacked or if I was I haven't cared, the post is muted so I'm not seeing anything yk.

but okay, everyone reads posts differently and mb a joke was misread idk but I've always tried to make it very clear that I can only speak for myself? I have in the last few asks made that clear and I try to explicitly state that every time. the only thing I'm like 'lol ur all wrong im right' about is like omegaverse alignment as a joke so I genuinely dont know where that comes from.

I am pretty sure ive never seriously spoken for more people then myself and maybe fran and niamh and I never will bc I obviously clearly cant. and if I ever have spoken for the whole community (outside of that one welcome to tumblr from twitter post) then?? that was dumb of me sorry abt that.

n yea for the last part I have let half the max fans just reblog it like I said before most just hijacked it as max positive n were normal abt it in the tags n then I dont mind I mind the people that start saying dumb shit abt me in the tags bc that urks me for obvious reasons. everyones free to read my posts however they want just dont be a dick n a good few people were dicks. so those I blocked.

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kalpasio · 1 year

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I ACCIDENTALLY GOT DISTRACTED WHEN I WAS READING THIS YESTERDAY SO I ONLY GOT TO FINISH THIS TODAY OOPS-

anyways,, THOMA !!!! MY BOY !!! I LOVE HIM SO MUCH,, every other paragraph I wanted to grab him by the shoulders and shake him aggressively like THOMA💥💥💥👹👹👹👹👹👹 (affectionately) unironically i actually really like chapter 3 lol, it was giving girls night/sleepover vibes

i got whiplash from the she/her pronouns ngl, its been a while since ive seen that in your writing HAHSJAJDKANDKWNS i dont mind tho ofc ✨

AYAKA AND KOKOMI HIT ME LIKE A TRUCK, THE GASP I LET OUT WHEN I READ THAT LIKE HAKXNWKDKWKDWO

short but sweet ! i really like it 🥹 we love our hoyoverse fire men™ i look forward to more of these,, maybe like diluc or smth but ofc i care the most abt kalpas definitely not me constantly staring at the request list, which i realized that most of the requests are from me- sorry

- herrscher anon (I KEPT ACCIDENTALLY TYPING KALPAS INSTEAD OF THOMA GOODBYE 😭😭😭)

HI HERRSCHER ANON!!!!! if I'm allowed to post fics months after the request you are definitely allowed to read them whenever you're free lol Thooooommmmmmaaaaaaaaaa 😭🧡 I just want to hold his hand i swear

chapter 3 was like "wow I have this cool idea" for the first like 3 paragraphs and then it's just "this made up character seems way too made up" and I wanted to make miyuki and reader be friends but like hhhhhhhh I also said reader and ayaka we're close but I don't think they ever speak to each other I'm so mad but the idea of Thoma being just a little jealous has me feeling some sorta way lol

I HAD TO GO BACK AND CHECK THAT I DID USE SHE/HER BECAUSE IVE GOTTEN SO USED TO GENDER NEUTRAL PRONOUNS the only reason it wasn't gender neutral is because I was struggling to get the meaning I wanted across?? shout out to my only other fic that doesn't use gender neutral pronouns for the same reason

AYAKA 👏 AND 👏 KOKOMI 👏 DESERVE 👏 TO BE 👏 HAPPY 👏

and if they happen to be happy with each other that's not my fault 👀

hoyoverse firey men have my heart. you can tell because if I type "hoyo" my phone immediately suggests hoyoverse firey men. I've mentioned it like 20 times but there is a mostly finished Diluc fic that we just don't talk about

I'm excited to do all the requests tho so don't worry about it! am I slow at writing them? yes. but you guys have some of the best ideas and I'm living for each and every one lol

would not be surprised if I tagged one of the chapters with Kalpas because that's just muscle memory

#we are having NONE of that #herrscher anon!! 🧡🧡#so many details you don't need #but im so glad you liked it 🧡🧡🧡#i think if i actually like #sat down and worked on it that the story would be better #but theres so much id need to add and im so lazy lmao #also i legit looked up the most popular ships for ayaka and it was thoma #and i said #went with like #the 5th most popular #i just want them to be happy your honor

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aurorapuppylover2002 · 1 year

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Aged Tieguanyin from 1986!

tried This around 2 weeks ago :), would have wrote abt it sooner but i got into a car crash like 3 hours later¹. SAD!

this is the first time i ever tried an oolong tea². While i dont have the packaging it came in anymore to give you more details. It was aged in a more traditional method that didnt involve re-roasting it every few years to keep a fresher flavor and to allow the aging process to come through in the taste. This tea was picked in Anxi county in Fujian, a province of southeast China that's directly across from Taiwan³.

The scent⁴ of the dry tea leaves prior to being steeped is really mellow and nice, its sort of a sweet fruity smell with deeper woodier, nuttier I'd even say notes that tie it together really well. Post steep the leaves open and the scent becomes much louder, relatively, and a lot of the bass notes of the tea came out more prominently, otherwise just about the same⁵.

The color of the liquor⁶ was a lovely golden yellow, and the light but glowing appearance is reflected in its taste. The tea again is reminiscent of its scent, light, fruity, with hints of walnuts and wood⁷. Tea had effectively no astringency and made for a very relaxed and cozy drinking experience.

I wouldn't put the taste as better than red teas ive tried, but the smell ive totally fallen for and is my favorite so far.

now if only i could get better teaware to increase the comfy vibes⁸. now that would be a treat :3c⁹

____________________________________________________

Footnotes

1. Im perfectly ok, and the crash wasnt my fault :) but it wasnt really the reason i havent posted im just a wee bit lazy, it definitely was why i didnt post same day tho

2. Ive likely tried oolong before at a restaurant or from a teabag, but both of those are probably pretty cheap doodoo teas that arent gonna be very comparable to a nice loose leaf. so im not counting them, + i dont remember them.

3. that was a bit awkward in its wording but i think location matters so i always wanna try to mention it, i also just love geography!

4. I kind of imply this in other parts of the post but since i had this tea ive tried another oolong that i bought a larger bag of and have been enjoying, will post abt it in the upcoming days because it's not aged plus this account is basically my tea journal. the smell here i dont prefer to the not aged oolong ive tried but is still super nice.

5. they are more different than i have the ability to articulate yet, but not by a ton

6. For some reason when i bought this i thought it was a puerh, maybe because i saw aged and forgot the rest lol. so when i poured the tea into my little cup and it was so light in color i was surprised and had go reread the package to discover my goof

7. im bad at tasting notes too still lol.

8. my current set up is a thin mug to brew in and a little ceramic dish¹⁰ to use as a lid, like a sort of thrifted gaiwan lol

9. :3c

10. I got most of my stuff from goodwill i dont have nice porcelain money for rn. saving to get something simple and nice tho! id at least want a nice gaiwan, its probably the most important thing to worry about the quality of, besides the leaves of course.

#tea #oolong #gong fu cha #shitty teaware

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