#oh mc: rain harris
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The Great Anguish of Our Separation Means Nothing to Me
Harry Choi x MC
Harry and MC meet again five weeks after breaking up. They never imagined the reunion will be like this.
Took the portion of Harry saying "You might have felt less tired if you cared less. Sorry." when MC was worried because he disappeared and ran with that self-blaming guilt here.
Words: 2.8k
Masterlist Read on AO3
They had finally run into each other.
It took them approximately five weeks to arrive at the empty bus stop on the same day at the same time, but here they were, late into the afternoon with the rain falling around them. She thought it would be a quick hello, how are you, are you happy, good, good, good. To Harry it was more of an oh, there she is, time for me to go. Who knows what nonsense I would say if I talked to her.
He wanted to run, but she was already approaching him. She was less of a coward than he was.
"You still come here," she said. "I thought you had forgotten about me."
Harry blurted, "Not everything is about you." Then hated himself for the spite he had unleashed. Then multiplied the hatred when she only nodded like she understood. "My room is colder now," he tried again. "My bed is cold."
"Oh?" She raised her brows. "Try turning up the heat or use the blanket I got you."
"Sure, I'll do that."
"Or just stop sleeping naked. That might help."
"It might, yes." Harry made a mental note to cut off the habit of parroting her. Not that he would ever meet her again. That seemed unlikely.
She shrugged. "Happy to help." Why he was still hurting her after they had ended she couldn't guess. She pushed aside the image of his bare body sleeping beside her. Rather than turning her on, it pinched her with a sour feeling in her gut. She had lost the privilege to watch him vulnerable, unguarded. Voyeuristic, he would jokingly call her. The old him would have. She didn't know who this person before her was.
Harry once heard that when one came across an ex, one had to prolong the conversation while subtly digging up truths about their well-being after the great separation. Preferably that they were doing well, but not too well that there was no evidence of their heart having been shattered. Sometimes joy could be reaped from someone else's despair.
"Have you been sleeping well?" he asked.
"Enough to keep me going."
"I see." He didn't. What he saw was the dark shadows under her eyes, but lack of sleep didn't mean she was depressed. She liked to knock herself out when she was. Harry understood that to some degree.
She gave him a wry smile. "How about you? Are you working these days?"
"Yeah, I'm doing great. I'm happy." He pulled at the fabric of his black turtleneck.
"Then I'm glad. I wanted that for you."
Her expression gave nothing away, none of the guilt Harry fantasised she would feel for ending their relationship. "What do you think I should eat for dinner?" he tested, trying to retain her attention. He had already lost forever; this finite time was all he had.
"Whatever you like." She dimly recalled it was how Harry used to show that he cared about her views and felt silly reenacting it.
"Can't you treat me as usual? Don't be so bland. You don't have to act differently just because we're over."
"Do I?"
Harry grunted. "I hate it when you answer a question with another question."
That was her point.
"You might not know this, but everything has changed. You are different. I am different. This is like, the inertia of life. Nothing can be forced to stay the same. Get on with it." She sighed. It was odd; she thought she had processed her hidden resentments about Harry, but now faced with the person himself, her old fury had resurfaced.
Harry shifted on his feet before closing their distance. The copper-red of his eyes was dull. She couldn't recall the last time they had been this close. "I'm sorry," he said after a moment. "I've been thinking about the things I did that drove you away. They weren't good. You went through so much just to hold on to me and I…" He shook his head. "Sorry you had to be there. You wouldn't be hurting as much had you loved me less."
She thought she would be relieved to receive an apology, but it irked her that he seemed sincere, that he could only understand how his mess had messed them up after she pulled the plug. "Who said I'm hurting?"
"We dated for a while. I can tell. You mask your pain with indifference."
She turned away. "I don't like you seeing me in pain."
"Consider it even. You've also seen me in my worst moments, and I didn't like that."
"Don't I know it." She glanced at Harry. He was studying the busy road stormed by the rain, mimicking her. There was a time when one of those couples in cars linking fingers and pressing the back of their hands to their lips was them. "What makes you think I didn't want that pain?" she asked. "If I had cared less about you, my life wouldn't be as meaningful. You saw me the way I wanted to be seen. That meant something to me."
"And look what good it did."
"You must think you know what's right for me."
"No, that's not what I mean." Harry rubbed the back of his head and sighed. "Do you regret it?"
"Regret what? You?" She tilted her head at him. "Never. I wouldn't be in that much pain if I didn't love you as much. Love spent on you was not love wasted." If she had to be honest—which she just was—this vulnerability made her want to regurgitate her lunch.
Harry's jaw tightened. "Not for me."
Instantly she regretted telling the truth. She had to clear her throat before asking: "You regret me?"
It humiliated her to be caught pining alone. On a subconscious level, she had hoped he would share her sentiment. However distant he was, the pain was bearable if she knew they were bearing it together. The separation would only feel final if she was left grieving alone. Hopeless, helpless, hating having to learn how.
"I didn't know you could still make a joke," Harry remarked. The wind was blowing the rain in, stamping the locks of his overgrown blond fringe onto his forehead. He didn't push them away. "When you were with me, I never gave you the best that you deserved. I regret that. I should've done more when I could."
"You tried." She was perversely relieved to hear his response. "Would you like a star sticker as a token of appreciation?"
"No." He gave her a look. "And trying isn't the same."
She agreed.
Out of nowhere, a car rushed by a puddle in front of them and Harry's arm shot out before her, retreating them deeper into the safety of the bus stop. There was a muddy splash on his shoes. She was fine. Her stomach was warm from the press of his arm.
"I don't know what I deserve actually," she conceded. "I wanted it to be you, but I was a lot sadder than I was happy. Maybe it was a me thing. Maybe if I don't know what I deserve, I can't be happy with anything given to me."
Harry shoved his hand into his pocket. "Or maybe you weren't happy because of me. You used to get angry a lot and I was annoyed by that. I blamed it on your unpredictable moods, but it was actually me. I set you off. I was the problem."
She let out a flat, humourless laugh. "I tried to be patient until you crossed the line. I thought I could put up with your rudeness, but I couldn't take it anymore. I can't be with someone who's only nice to me but mean to everyone else, Harry."
His gaze on her was hard. "Good, you shouldn't have."
"But that doesn't mean I didn't love you." She braved herself to face him and put a hand on his shoulder. He tensed. "All my happiest moments were with you, however scarce they were. You tried so hard to make me feel loved, and it isn't that I loved you because you loved me, but because you were willing to try for my sake." Her hold clawed into a grip, but Harry didn't flinch. "You should know that you are the best person I've ever dated. There isn't, and won't be, anyone like you."
His head tilted forwards almost imperceptibly. "I know," he muttered. "I know you loved me. I was there too."
Silence settled over them. It wasn't a silence that filled in the blanks, the comfortable kind lovers loved to fawn over. This silence was agonising, brimming with words they couldn't confess. They could have, if they wanted to risk showing their hands, but hands and cards and everything that required vulnerability were never on the table. They never stood a chance.
She listened to the harsh patter against the bus stop roof. The conversation was dwindling. Every time she wanted to leave, the illusion of the past pulled her back. Like how one graduating from school would mourn the ending of that life phase despite the hardship they had faced, she was bowed under the loss of something that was already over. Letting go was a whole different thing than breaking up. She had to do it over and over until it slipped free from her clutch. She did not want to let go of her misery. Who would she be without him? But who would she be if she continued to be with him?
"Was it the same for you?" she croaked. She felt her eyes wet with tears, but it was a faraway feeling like she was performing the mechanism of crying, yet she couldn't really feel it.
"Don't cry," Harry gritted out. "I hate it when you cry."
"I'm not. It's the rain."
"Do you think I'm stupid? Stop lying. Just stop it."
Did he think she didn't know him? That he feared he wouldn't be able to hold back if he saw her cry? His rudeness was not all bad when it served as his mask. If she could save him from her pain, she would. It was her last gift for him after the havoc she had wreaked. It was the only thing she could do after leaving him.
She blinked the tears away. "All right, I'm sorry."
"Don't—" Harry's voice cracked. "Don't be so polite to me. You're supposed to fight back, do the opposite of what I asked. That's how you were. You were always straightforward with me and yourself, not like this."
"I'm still honest."
"Now you lie with a straight face."
"Something you do naturally." She smiled and fought to keep her voice from wavering.
Harry put her hand away from his shoulder with a deep, shuddering breath as if it physically pained him to separate her from him. "Not to you. I've always been frank with you."
She looked down at his hand covering hers for a second longer than needed. His hands were always cold. Time would make her forget how they felt in hers, she thought with aching sorrow. "Then tell me. Did I mean anything to you?"
"No point in answering that now." Harry could hear the thrum of the bus engine and feel the heat emanating from it beside him. His bus had arrived, but he couldn't move.
"I don't understand you. One second you look like you still want me, then you swat me away like a fly in the next. I'm not a fly. Why are you doing this?" she demanded. "You've questioned me and I've answered. Now it's your turn."
"Does it matter what I want if we can't—" Harry pressed his lips into a tight line. "Never mind."
"It does."
"And then what?" he challenged. "We get back together? That's impossible."
"No, I don't want that," she said. She felt a responsibility to set him free from his looming guilt. Perhaps he could not be good enough for her, but he could be for someone else. There had to be somebody who could appreciate him as who he was. She wished for his happiness above all else.
Harry huffed out a derisive laugh. "Me neither."
When he presented it as an impossibility, it had been an attempt to lower his expectations in case she didn't want him anymore. And she didn't. And it hurt just the same. Harry didn't know there was no limit to heartbreak.
She took a step towards him. "If you hate me, curse at me. Yell at me. I give you permission. Only don't do it halfway through. Commit to what you actually want for once."
"Why should I? You only want me to hurt you to feel better about yourself," he spat. "If I'm suffering, you have to suffer along with me. Except I'm not, so I guess you'll just have to suffer alone. Good luck with that."
Harry looked away before he could catch her expression and noticed that the bus had left. He didn't understand why he always resorted to scathing words as his defence. He thought he was capable of change, but how did one become kinder and retain the goodness inside? Harry didn't feel worthy of being kind. He owed it to himself to hurt. Times like this made his living inside his skin unendurable.
If she didn't know Harry better, she would have believed him. Beneath his callous words was his calloused heart that she failed to care for. If this was the last time he could use grief as a weapon, then she would let him. Eventually, his feelings for her would fade and she would be just another person he loved. While her love for him would live on, he was not the kind to linger in the past.
She wouldn't be any different to him, she had to believe that.
Harry started when he felt her palms closing around his clenched fists. She slowly pried them open, revealing crescent marks on their surface. He didn't realise he had been doing it. "All these months we have been suffering alone, have we not?" she asked, voice surprisingly gentle. "Just as you cannot love me forever, your hatred won't last either. We're only this sad because we were so in love. Those feelings had to balance out somehow. You'll be free soon enough."
Harry felt ashamed in the face of her blunt forgiveness. She looked at him like she knew of the war inside his mind and understood it. There was a transparent understanding in her eyes that he couldn't stand, reflecting himself to him. The emptiness was too much to handle. "I don't hate you," he finally said. "I never did."
"I left you. It's fine if you do."
"But I don't."
They stared at each other. A ghost of a smile on her face and palpable guilt on Harry's. None of them were happy.
"I should get going," she said.
Harry hesitated, then pulled her into a hug. His body remembered hers, how her curves felt against the hard planes of his, and how comforting her arms that embraced him back were. No more would there be someone he could go and hide with when the world closed in on him. How did he ever let go of someone like her? Where had the strength come from? But he had done it once, he could do it again.
Harry let his arms fall. Looking at her, he was reminded of things too late to speak of. The compliments he hadn't found the chance to tell her before their breakup, the promises he wished he could still keep, the trivial matters of his life that he wanted to share with her. How his conviction had stuttered when he saw her earlier. It didn't matter now.
Harry fetched his black umbrella that was leaning against the bench and handed it to her. "Take it."
"What about you?"
"I'll wait for the bus."
She seemed amused. "You know how to take the bus?"
"I don't forget the things you've taught me," Harry said. It was the one honesty he could offer her.
"Well, then." She took the umbrella and clicked it open. "Have fun waiting."
"Be careful on your way home."
"You too. Don't walk in the rain. Don't get sick."
"I won't," he said.
At her retreating footsteps, Harry tipped his head against the glass wall behind him. He would always regret her. He swore it. How else would he keep the memory of her alive? Some happiness was not to be learned. He would not ever forget her.
If she turned around, she would see him watching her diminishing figure, harbouring a pointless, rabid hope that she would look back. Hadn't they shared the same habits at one point?
But she walked on.
-
Footnotes:
Bus leaving before Harry could get on mirrors his inability to move on.
To me, this story is that feeling of when you meet your ex and feel like you don't know them anymore because they look different now, but after a few exchanges, you can see that they're still the one you fell for, then came the dawning realisation that you were right to break up.
Does regret mean anything in an expired relationship? Can forgiveness from your loved one free you from the guilt of hurting them? I like to toy with the idea of forgiveness and whether an action could objectively be forgiven or understood, and how far you can forgive someone when those wrongs come in the form of the person you love.
If you noticed, they never actually say "I love you" in the present tense and avoid strong emotional words. They can't admit it because that requires being vulnerable. They think the reason they broke up was only because of Harry's rudeness, but it was also their fear of vulnerability and tendency to assume things instead of communicating. These things had piled up as resentment and exploded.
I wanted to explore another type of post-breakup meeting where Harry isn't as bitter and MC isn't the one to blame as in the original bad ending. I also wanted to do something different after seeing a lot of breakup fics where the pair is super angry and hates one another.
Buy me a glass of something that's definitely not coffee because I can't stand it but it is the website's name if my story touches you in some way? No worries if you don't. I'm still grateful you've read all the way through here.
#if you thought i wasn't going to write anything angsty after playing his bad ending then you don't know me at all#harry choi angst#harry choi x mc#harry choi#harry choi fanfic#the ssum harry#the ssum#the ssum imagines#xela writes
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Deep End - Chapter 17: Die for Me
...in which Ezi feels betrayed, and Harry just wants to help.
AU: famous!harry, siren!mc, adult modern retelling of the little mermaid? lol, fake dating, enemies to lovers.
WARNING: MATURE THEMES
All chapters / Synopsis / Moodboard / Playlist
A/N: Starting my new job tomorrow, kinda nervous but excited!!! Enjoy this chapter. New update next week :)
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A million thoughts ran through Harry’s mind when Maggie took him to her home. It was an old block of flats near Shadwell station. Hers was the door numbered 27 on the ground floor.
“I hope she’s awake now,” Maggie said as she unlocked the door. There was light coming out of the room at the end of the hallway, and Maggie beckoned Harry to follow. The flat was cold and wet, with muddy boot prints on the wooden floor, but it didn’t make any difference since both Harry and Maggie were soaked from the rain anyway.
“Oh, you’re awake,” Maggie said as she entered the room. “Harry is here to see you, dear.”
When Harry stepped in, Ezi’s blue eyes pinned him to the spot. She was sitting on the bed in Maggie’s funky rainbow t-shirt; her forehead and arms were bruised. Maggie had told Harry that Ezi had fallen from the bridge, and honestly, he had imagined worse, so this was quite a big relief. He did wonder how Maggie had managed to dive in and save her, but that was a question for later.
“Hi, Ezi. How are you feeling?” There was no response or reaction, so he continued, “I was very worried when I heard. I’m glad you’re safe now.”
Still nothing. Just two hollowed eyes staring at him like they didn’t speak the same language.
“I’ll leave you two alone,” Maggie said.
It was then that Ezi spoke. "Get out. No, not you, Maggie. You can stay. I don't want him here."
Harry's gaze jumped to Maggie, who was now half a step out of the door. She slowly looked up, eyes locked with his.
He didn't know what he was expecting, for her to say something, maybe? He wished she would defend him and try to convince Ezi to just hear him out. But Maggie only stared back, helpless, as if saying, 'Maybe you should go.'
But you fucking asked me to come here, Harry wanted to say, but he clenched his fists and took a deep breath.
Ezi still refused to meet his eyes. She had her arms crossed in front of her chest and an agonising look on her face. It was at this moment that Harry thought about her falling into the dark water, her struggling to swim, drowning and helpless against the currents for the first time in her life. She must have been so scared. He wished he'd been there. He would have jumped in and tried to save her.
"Ezi--"
"What did I say?" she snapped. "Get the hell out or I'll start screaming and the neighbours will come. Maybe they'll even call the police." She whipped her head to Maggie with a threatening glare. "You wouldn't want the police to knock on your door, right?"
Maggie tugged gently at Harry's soaked sleeve. "M-Maybe you should go outside for a bit."
But Harry was impatient. He shrugged off Maggie and strode over to the bed, and Ezi recoiled and gripped the duvet tightly to her chest, an alarmed look on her face as he sat down on the edge of it and reached for her. She didn't think he meant any harm, did she?
"Hey, listen." Carefully, he placed his hand on her knee and felt her stiffen against his touch. He hated this. What had he done? "Ezi, please hear me out."
"I've heard enough," she hissed. "My sister tried to kill me, my queendom is in danger, and now I can't go home. Are you happy now?"
"Of course not. How could you say that?"
"Harry, maybe you should go.”
Maggie’s attempt to intervene was ignored.
"When Maggie told me what happened to you, I was so scared I'd lose you. Why do you think I came?"
"You came because you feel guilty." The words came out of Ezi’s mouth so fast that Harry believed she'd spent this whole time thinking of the reason why. "You want me to forgive you for the horrible things you said so you could move on. Well, guess what? I'm not a person, remember? I don't feel, and therefore, I have no sympathy for you.” There was a pause, and then, the worst thing she could possibly say to him, "You will never get my forgiveness, Harry." Her voice was shaking, her lashes wet. "I can't believe for a second...I was willing to die for you."
When coming here, Harry had prepared himself to get yelled at or have stuff thrown at him depending on how well Ezi was, but to hear her say she would never forgive him left him completely numb. His hand fell back onto his lap, and he sat there, watching her turn her back to him and yank the duvet up to her neck. As she pretended to fall back to sleep, he got up and quietly left the room.
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“Hope you like herbal tea. I don’t really drink tea.”
“Thank you.”
Maggie placed the steaming cup down on the table, and Harry instantly warmed his hands on it. The kitchen was just as cold as the rest of the flat, and while waiting for the water to boil, Harry had taken some time to observe. Everything here seemed clean and tiny but didn’t really feel like it. He paid attention specifically to the seashells collection on top of the fridge and the dead flowers, which had sat in that dusty vase for so long that they’d turned black. Since this building was so close to the tube station, you could hear the train from the distance.
“It gets quieter after midnight,” Maggie said as she sat down in front of Harry with her own cup of tea. Harry’s cup was plain white, but hers was shaped like a fox.
Harry blew into his cup and took a sip. “So, how did you manage to find Ezi? Did she tell you she was going to the bridge?”
“Not at all. I followed her there because I assumed that would be the place she would meet the Sea Queen.”
Harry froze while Maggie just calmly took a sip of her steaming tea.
“What…did you just say?” he asked.
The steam fogged up her glasses, so she took them off, folded them, and set them down on the table. Without them, her blue eyes were more vivid than usual, almost resembling Ezi’s. The colour of the sea.
Chills rushed down Harry’s spine and he swallowed thickly. “You know what she is?”
“Harry, darling,” Maggie said. “I am what she is.”
“You’re…a siren?”
“Well, I used to be. Decades ago. My sister killed the man I loved. He was a fisherman. I was supposed to become the next Sea Queen, but my sister had always been jealous of me. She knew I was in love with a fisherman, so she murdered him and ate his heart. But then she suddenly possessed power so strong that she could raise the ocean and drown an entire island. She turned me into a human and forced me to live eternity in this world while she told everyone that I had been killed by my lover. And I must tell you this, immortality is overrated. People mourn and forget about you, and you have to watch every single person you know pass away.”
That was too much for Harry to take. He could feel the pounding of his heart inside his own head. After a moment of silence, he managed to ask, “Have you told Ezi?”
“Yes. She was more shocked than you, actually. But deep down, she knows I’m someone she can trust. I think we established this mutual understanding from the moment we first met. After all, we both share royal blood. One Queen would recognise the other.”
“Does that mean she’s gonna be trapped here for eternity as well?”
“Unlikely. I think her sister took the pig’s heart, thinking it was your heart, and attempted to kill her, but failed.”
“We have to do something.”
“We are no match for the Sea Queen. It’s Ezi who has to stand up for herself.”
“I don’t want her to end up like you.” The words flew out before Harry could stop himself, causing Maggie to stare at him, wide-eyed. “I’m sorry. That’s not what I meant,” he stuttered. “But Ezi is a good person. Not that I’m saying you’re not, but Ezi never really wants to be Queen. She just wants to make her mother proud. She just wants to be loved like any of us in this godforsaken world. She belongs here with me. She deserves to have a normal life here with a family that appreciates her, and if those creatures believe she’s dead, then we cannot allow her to face them.”
“Those creatures are her family.”
“By blood, not by choice.” Harry clenched his fist so he wouldn’t slam it on the table. “I’m not letting her go back to the ocean after what they put her through.”
Maggie broke into laughter as she slowly shook her head. “Do you have any idea what you’re talking about, child? When they realise the heart they have is not yours, they will come back for you. The Sea Queen would do anything for your heart. Now you may say you don’t care, that you will gladly die for your damsel in distress or whatever, but what you’re thinking right now isn’t heroic; it’s foolish. This is not your fight, Harry. If the Sea Queen got your heart, she would wipe out humankind.”
“So you’re saying I have no choice but to lose Ezi?”
Maggie reached across the table to hold his trembling hand as she looked into his eyes. For a moment, they shared a sense of understanding. “If you care about Ezi, you must stay back and let her fight her own battle.”
Harry picked up his cup of tea and sipped away in silence. Then, he asked, “Did you turn back into a siren to save Ezi from the river?”
Maggie smiled. “No. I’m just a really good swimmer.”
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Harry woke up to find Ezi staring at him. He was sitting in the armchair facing her bed, unsure how or how long ago he’d fallen asleep, but it seemed like she had been awake for a while; she’d read a big chunk of the book lying open and face down on her lap.
“You know, you talk in your sleep,” she said suddenly, breaking the nerve-wracking silence between them. Harry didn’t expect her to acknowledge his existence after her tantrum earlier, so he really didn’t know what that observation was supposed to mean.
“Did I say something wrong?” he asked, combing his fingers through his messy hair.
“No, it’s just gibberish, really. But you seemed frightened.”
He had a good reason to be. Although he didn’t quite remember the specifics, he’d had a short nightmare about falling into the ocean, and he’d just kept falling and falling. There had been flashes of a half-fish, half-human creature, and the stench of blood was alarmingly vivid. When the claws ripped his chest open, the last thing he saw was Ezi’s face, his blood dripping from her fangs.
“It’s alright,” he said. “I’m alright.”
Ezi only nodded. This eerie nonchalance wasn’t like her at all, and he kind of wished she would start yelling at him again. Instead, she flipped the duvet to the side, revealing her broken ankle, which had been bandaged by Maggie. Speaking of Maggie, where the hell was that woman? She had told Harry to watch Ezi as she went out to get groceries, so she should be home by now.
“Would you mind helping me out of bed? I want a bath,” Ezi said.
Harry was frozen in shock for a second, then he snapped out of it and quickly got up from the chair to help her. She could barely walk, so she had her arm around his neck and held onto him as she limped to the bathroom. He would offer to carry her, but he wasn’t sure if they were cool enough for that yet; she couldn’t have forgiven him after one short nap.
He drew the bath with extra hot water, just the way she liked it, and waited for her to strip off her clothes so he could settle her into the bath. She lay there, her bandaged ankle resting on the edge of the tub, looking relaxed as if she’d just finished her 9-to-5 and not survived from attempted murder by her own sister. After his conversation with Maggie, Harry knew Ezi couldn’t have that simple life, but he couldn’t help but fantasise about one for them.
“If you need me, I’ll be in the kitchen. Just call.” Harry turned to leave, but Ezi stopped him.
“Wait. Can you stay here with me?”
He stared at her. “You want me to stay?”
“Yeah, to make sure I don’t fall asleep. I don’t want my bandage wet.”
“Okay. I’ll stay then.” He came to sit on the floor beside the tub, elbow resting on the edge, head against his knuckles. Steam curled up from the water as she soaked her entire body in, only leaving her head above the surface. They sat in silence, listening to the dripping of the sink. Harry had so much to say, yet he didn’t want to give her a reason to dismiss him. Maybe she’d thought it through and changed her mind about him. Letting him stay here with her could be her way of showing forgiveness.
“When you said I wasn’t a person,” she spoke suddenly yet quietly, “was there any part of you that meant it?”
He nervously wet his lip. “To say no would be a lie. So yes, only at that moment, though,” he sighed. “It was like…oh, I think I’m in love with this girl, but now I find out she’s been plotting to murder me this whole time, so maybe none of it was real.”
Ezi nodded once. “Fair enough.”
Her response made him chuckle. “You know, you sound very British now.”
“Guess I’m easily influenced,” she said, giggling a little. It felt good to hear her laugh again.
“But I’m very sorry about the things I said out of anger. I didn’t mean them.”
“That’s okay. I know you didn’t. I guess I was being a little bit harsh, too. I just...well, it was a lot. Feeling betrayed by you and then my sister also betrayed me, and I..."
She left the sentence unfinished. Silence seeped back in as Harry watched her stare intensely at her broken ankle.
“Why didn't you believe me when I said I loved you?”
His question caught her by surprise, and her brows furrowed thoughtfully. “Why do you believe you love me? I’m not trying to be mean or anything, but as you said, love is a complicated thing. It’s not one emotion. You can’t possibly know what love feels like.”
“Yeah, well…I don’t know. But I miss you when you’re not around. I get happy when you are. I think about you in the middle of the day. And I’ve been having these scenarios of you, me, and Chilli just having a normal life together, away from the fame and your murderous family. I know I’m just a useless human. I don't have magical powers, nor am I the ruler of a kingdom, but I want to protect you and keep you safe. If that's not love, it's something very close.”
“Well...I wouldn’t know.”
“I think you do, Ezi,” Harry said. “When was the moment you realised you couldn’t kill me?”
“This may sound silly, but I think it was bedtime, and you were reading to me and Chilli, and you were so tired that you stumbled over your words.”
“You didn’t want to kill me because I couldn’t read properly?”
She rolled her eyes at the joke. “It was when I realised I didn’t want to be Queen or my mother’s puppet. I just wanted to be in bed with you and the cat after a long day and listen to bedtime stories.”
When she placed her hand on top of his, Harry squeezed it tight and brought it to his lips.
“Harry!” Maggie’s shout made Harry jump. He told Ezi that he would be right back and hurried to the hallway to see what Maggie needed. But Maggie had brought another guest home with her.
“Dawson?”
“This handsome boy saw me at the station, and I told him about Ezi so he wanted to come check on her,” Maggie said as she unzipped her boots. Meanwhile, Dawson stood there holding two grocery bags and gave Harry a tight-lipped smile.
Maggie headed to the kitchen, and the men followed. Watching Dawson put away the groceries, Harry couldn’t even act like he wasn’t upset. He came to stand beside Maggie by the table. “You told him about Ezi?”
“He’s her friend, isn’t he?”
“Yeah, but not every friend of hers needs to know.”
“Harry, I’m literally right here. I can hear you.”
“Yeah, I know, Dawson. You shouldn’t even be here.”
Eyes narrowed, Maggie flicked her finger between them. “I sense some tension here. Is there any rivalry backstory that I need to know?”
“No,” Harry and Dawson said at the same time, but it was obvious in the death stare they’d been giving each other. What was Dawson doing here anyway? Harry thought that it was clear that Ezi wasn’t interested in him. Why was he so persistent? Ezi probably didn’t even want to see hi—
“Dawson!”
“Ezi!”
Harry’s jaw dropped when Ezi – now with clothes on and her hair in a towel – limped into the kitchen to embrace Dawson. Okay, rude. What about their romantic moment in the bathroom?
“I’m so sorry for running away without an explanation,” Ezi said, eyes squeezed shut, still holding Dawson like he was a lifeboat in the middle of the storm. Harry tried to act unbothered, but it did make his skin crawl.
“It’s okay. I’m glad that you’re okay now. Maggie told me about your car crash.”
“Car crash?” Ezi blinked at Dawson, then whipped her head to Maggie and Harry. “You lied to him?”
“Well, I…I didn’t know if he knew…”
“He doesn’t,” Harry told Maggie.
Ezi let out and sigh and took Dawson’s hands. “I can’t keep lying to my friends, and I think you of all people should know the truth.”
“Erm, Ezi?” Harry spoke, but Ezi ignored him and told Dawson to take a seat, then sat down beside him. Harry opened his mouth but Maggie shushed him so Ezi could talk.
There was no way this was a good idea. Dawson would think Ezi was wrong in the head for admitting that she was actually a mythical creature. He wouldn’t believe her, but on second thought, maybe that would be for the best. If Dawson didn’t believe Ezi, he would leave, and Harry wouldn’t have to worry about him anymo—
“I believe you.”
“What?” Harry gasped, causing all heads to turn to him. Quickly, he sat down at the table across from his cousin. “You believe that she’s a siren? Really?”
“Yes.”
“Be fucking for real. You’re only saying that because you’re a simp.”
“Harry!” Ezi gasped, but Harry hadn’t said anything he didn’t mean.
“He probably thinks you’re crazy, Ezi. He doesn’t actually believe this without proof.”
“Well, I’ve spent enough time with her to know that she’s not just odd because she’s American, Harry. And to be honest, her being a siren is better than her being American.”
“Thank you, Dawson.”
“Absolutely ridiculous,” Harry hissed as he slumped back into his chair, arms crossed like an angry child.
Ezi sighed. “Guys, can you let me talk to Harry for a sec?”
“Yeah, sure, Dawson, come. I’d be happy to answer any of your questions about us,” Maggie said as she pulled Dawson up by his arm.
“Us? Wait, so you’re also a siren???” Dawson said before his voice faded into the hallway.
Now alone with Harry, Ezi’s smile was gone. “What the hell? Why were you acting like a dick?”
Harry leaned across the table so he could whisper angrily to her so the other two couldn’t hear. “Because you didn’t need to drag my cousin into this. He doesn’t have to be involved.”
“I’m tired of lying,” Ezi said. “And who cares if he knows? It’s not gonna change anything.”
Harry let out an exaggerated exhale as he threw his hands in the air. “Because he’s going to want to help, and if he dies, my mother will kill me. Maggie and I are enough help around here.”
“Who says any of you is gonna help me?” Ezi scoffed. “Tomorrow, I will come up with a plan and confront my mother on my own. I just don’t want to leave this world without telling the truth. I owe it to everyone here.”
“Wow, you’re so fucking strong and independent, aren’t you? You have to do everything on your own. I swear to God, Ezi, for fucking once, let other people help.”
Her eyes went wide with feigned shock. “Oh, what are you gonna do? You’re gonna punch my mother in the face when she shows up to rip out your heart? I think you humans underestimate how easily we can—"
“Listen," he cut her off, "when you told me you were willing to die for me, I told myself that I would not let that happen again. We’ll come up with something, but I want to help. After all, I will be her new target when she finds out the heart Koa brought to her isn’t real. Also, how did you manage to get a pig’s heart??? You know what? It doesn’t matter. What’s important is that I need to be there with you, and you can't get rid of me."
Worry edged into Ezi’s expression. “How do I know you won't abandon me again?"
"You need to trust me this time."
"Trust should be earned, not given."
"I'll earn it then. Just...don't push me away."
Ezi's expression immediately softened, and Harry knew he had said the right thing. Even though he wasn't sure if he was forgiven or not, it was reassuring to know she still wanted to give him another chance.
"I gotta go check on Dawson and make sure Maggie hasn’t traumatised him.”
Ezi pushed herself up from her chair, and Harry quickly got up to help her. “You know, if push comes to shove, we should sacrifice Dawson.”
With her arm around his neck, she shot him a glare. “Harry.”
“Sorry, sorry, just a thought,” he said, grinning.
#harry styles#deep end series#harry x ezi#harry styles fanfic#harry styles writing#harry styles fluff#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles imagine#harry styles imagines#harry styles fanfics#harry styles fanfictions#harry styles smut#harry styles fic#harry styles angst
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Welcome 2 My Blog
oh hi. if u don't know who i am, my name's gracie. but you can also call me pikabelle. i'm a teenage female who has never heard of the term cringe. why? bc cringe culture is (mostly) dead to me.
im also reeeaaaaalllly into pokemon. like reaaallllyyy into it. my top three are aggron, tyrantrum, and zweilous. i also really like 2003 strawberry shortcake and mlp fim.
like my music taste? here it is:
Breaking Benjamin
KoRn
System of a Down
Slipknot
Rob Zombie
Eminem (older)
Hollywood Undead
Evanescence
Disturbed
The Pharcyde
Attila
Schoolly D
MC Chris
Rain Paris
Ozzy Osbourne
Metallica
Old Run-D.M.C
A lot of vgm
Motionless in White
Tag Team
Johnathan Young
Katy Perry (before Witness)
Weird Al Yankovic
likes: pizza, metal, old school hip-hop, playing the piano, pokemon, horror movies, the transformers movies (the soundtrack specifically), dark fiction, bacon, sausages, burgers, french fries, cringy 2000s and 90s stuff, dark/offensive humor, freaktale (thanks to @sharks-freakshow-aus), pokemon the series s&m, chinese food, authentic mexican food, sushi, seafood (especially crab), american mcgee's alice (and madness returns), partying, the 90s addams family
dislikes: boy bands, overtly colorful video games, bad puns, romcoms, nicki minaj, cardi b, glitchtale, eggs (on their own), people who take themselves way too seriously, taco bell, harry styles, lizzo, katy perry (witness - onwards), jehovah's witnesses, bible thumpers, taylor swift (i prefer her country over her pop), radfems, libfems, bts stans, ea
any mental disorders? i have autism but i'm more on the asperger's side
anyways here are some rules:
my profile my shit. if you don't like what i post kindly reply ur heart out
if i catch you glorifying my autism or tracing my ocs i WILL track you down.
don't message me annoyingly saying how you wanna be my friend. that's not how making friends work.
death threats and hate art are strictly off-limits and forbidden.
i dont accept random requests. pls use the ask button if you wanna request.
i don't mind fanart as long as you credit me.
anyway's that's it 4 now
do yall not know im a metalhead?
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Choices Crossover Fics 2023 Masterlist
✒️= Fanfic | 📱= Text Fics/Edits | 🎨= Fanart
Ⓜ️ = Mature Content 18+ | 🔥 = Explicit/NSFW 18+
January 2023
History Hates Lovers ✒️| Red Carpet Diaries / Desire & Decorum |Thomas Hunt x F!MC, Anabelle Parsons x F!MC - @peonyblossom
March 2023
Blood Moon ✒️| Bloodbound / Wolf Bride | Adrian Raines x F!Reader x M!OC - @khoicesbyk 🔥
Immortal Desires Harris (Series) | Immortal Desires / My Two First Loves Noah Harris x MC - @korgbelmont
Part 5 ✒️
Part 6: Finale ✒️
May 2023
Harris A New Life ✒️| Immortal Desires / My Two First Loves |Noah Harris (MTFL) x Gabriela Adalhard (ID) - @korgbelmont
Serendipity ✒️Ⓜ️| The Royal Romance/ Open Heart | Drake Walker x MC, Bryce Lahela x MC - @deb-1106 and @walkerismychoice
Serendipity Part 2 ✒️| The Royal Romance / Open Heart | Drake Walker x MC, Bryce Lahela x MC - @deb-1106 and @walkerismychoice
In Times of Comfort ✒️| The Royal Romance / Red Carpet Diaries |Thomas Hunt x F!OC - @alj4890
Once (Series) | The Royal Romance / Red Carpet Diaries | Sam Dalton, Ethan Ramsey, Robin Flores - @peonierose
Part 4 ✒️Ⓜ️
June 2023:
Angels in Hell ✒️| A Courtesan of Rome / Open Heart | Marc Anthony x MC, Tobias Carrick x MC - @boneandfur
Répondez,S'il Vous Plaît! ✒️ | Immortal Desires / It Lives | Multiple Pairings - @aallotarenunelma 🏳️🌈
Répondez,S'il Vous Plaît ! 2 (AU Series) ✒️| Immortal Desires / It Lives | Multiple Pairings - @aallotarenunelma 🏳️🌈
Dancing with Our Hands Tied ✒️| The Royal Romance / Rules of Engagement |Leo Rys x F!MC - @leelee10898
Friends with Rollerskates ✒️| Bloodbound / Open Heart | BB!F!OC and OH!M!OC - @ezekielbhandarivalleros
One Night in Cordonia (Round Robin) | The Royal Romance / Open Heart - @jerzwriter
Chapter 8: All's Well That Ends Well ✒️Ⓜ️
July 2023
you’ll find me on my tallest tiptoes, spinning in my highest heels, love, shining just for you ✒️| Hot Coture & Crimes of Passion | Marco Di Vincezo x F!MC, Marguerite Thorne x F!OC - @peonyblossom
The Royal Romance, Crimes of Passion, Desire & Decorum, Blades of Light and Shadow
Shadows & Deceptions: A Royal Murder Mystery Parts 1 & 2 ✒️| Various Pairings - @storyofmychoices
Shadows & Deceptions: A Royal MurderMystery Parts 3 & 4 ✒️| Various Pairings - @storyofmychoices
The Royal Romance / Crimes of Passion / Desire & Decorum/ Blades of Light & Shadow
Shadows & Deceptions: A Royal Murder Mystery Parts 5 & 6 ✒️| Various Pairings - @storyofmychoices
Shadows & Deceptions: A Royal Murder Mystery Parts 7 & 8 ✒️| Various Pairings - @storyofmychoices
August 2023
Crimes of Passion / Nightbound
Crimes/Nightbound Drabble ✒️| Nik Ryder x MC, Trystan Thorne x MC - @lilyoffandoms
October 2023
Bloodbound/Nightbound
Disembodied (Series) ✒️| Adrian Raines x MC, Nik Ryder x MC - @mynotsohealthyobsession
Part 3 (of 8)
Endless Summer/Hero
Let the Shadows Fall Behind You ✒️| Jake McKenzie x MC, ES!MC & Hero!MC - @saibug1022
November 2023
Bloodbound/Nightbound
Disembodied (Series) Part 5 ✒️ | Adrian Raines x MC, Nik Ryder x MC - @mynotsohealthyobsession
December 2023
Bloodbound/Nightbound
Disembodied - Part 6/8 ✒️| Adrian Raines x MC, Nik Ryder x MC - @mynotsohealthyobsession
The Nanny Affair/Open Heart
Once (Series) ✒️| Sam Dalton, TNA F!MC, Ethan Ramsey by @peonierose Part 5
Immortal Desires / It Lives Anthology
Jouluyö - Christmas Night ✒️🏳️🌈🌟| Various Pairings - @aallotarenunelma
#choices fanfic#playchoices fanfic#choices fic writers creations#cfwc fics of the week#choices crossover fanfic
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If your favorite ship had a "getting together" scene like in a sitcom, what song would play over it?
Oh no Rose you got me thinking. Also I'm a cop out so I'm doing my two favorite ships. But also is it a funny song for a funny getting together scene? Or is like that rare dramatic scene in a sitcom where it rains on the mcs? Why can't I ever just answer a simple question?
I'm such a fuckin copout I'm doing both
Okay so for Elmax, their serious song would be; Satellite by Harry Styles. That part in the song where it goes; "Be there for ya," and the drums start, boom: Elmax kiss. Their funny song would be Super Freak by Rick James, do I have to explain this one?
Now for Stenbrough I have a whole playlist on sad songs for them bc they are just that kind of ship, but I got to pick happy ones for them. Their serious song would so be Make Up Your Mind by Florence and The Machine. Stan being so frustrated with Bill about how he can't just commit to him but when he threatens to just leave Bill kisses him because he can't lose him. Their fun song would be Falling by Chase Atlantic if it wasn't an angsty get together.
#thank you for the ask Rose!#I had to update your tag#i love fun lil questions like these#sam answers asks#elmax#stenbrough#bill denbrough#stanley uris#el hopper#max mayfield
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Teo doubtful again 🥺 I hope the meeting with Harry goes well
If it's the only thing you're going to show Harry, let's hope he doesn't refuse to help you 😅
Present your initial idea, ask for how to improve your story and leave, clear and fast
You'd be surprised how many times I've also doubted what I've written and deleted because I didn't like it, don't worry Teo
It's always nice to see other people's opinions but... Knowing how Harry treats you sometimes... 😮💨
Haha, me while giving plot to my MC and him without knowing it 🤣 I love it in part, the truth
With so much material you have, it's normal that it would be difficult to carry everything 🤭
OH!
Ok, that is really annoying, doing something and just getting caught in the rain 😩
Aaw... Poor Teo... 🥺
You took everything so you don't have to make several trips 😂
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Omg hope she likes it!!! That fic raised me
Lol I’m fine tbh but the two classes I have today are professors who are very anti sneezing in class lmao so I was like whatever send me the notes. It’s just a sore throat and a little lethargy I guess. I thought it was bc of the weather but I did get swabbed yday and the doc was like yeah ur Covid positive (but std negative slay). I have nothing coming up this week so I thought I’d take a break from studying lol I was reading this book about a rockstar (and I swear to god if you squint it’s totally one direction fanfic like there ain’t nooooo waaaayyyy it’s not) and I was like oop lemme see what’s going on in the fandom ❤️
We love being holy and doing holy things 🤪 I might listen to 1989 tv cus I remember liking that album lol but I’m not crazy into her. Right now my ass is listening to 10 hours of rain sounds lmaooo but I do have troye and mansionz2 queued up lol todays my catch-up day fr 💀💀💀
Girl I was just about to read the stepbro fic!! I feel way too giddy about it for no reason 💀😭 lol i reread dark (version 2) last night and I got this empty pit in my stomach cus I miss those weirdos 💔 also I feel slow but Jude’s dad is totally a cult leader in that fic bye the brainwashing makes sense I’m an idiot Peach literally spelt it out lmao I even read version 1 and didnt even connect the dots properly, my ass was like oh he’s like a mercenary or smthn arms dealer perhaps (I was totally mixing it up with junior mafia au) (to be fair on myself I was reading a lot of things at once!!)
I also lowkey started reading webtoons lmao it’s been a busy day since I woke up
Anyways might bother you all day w my essay messages ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ before I go ghost again 💀💀
that's good (that ur fine and don't have std slay)😌 and omg which boookkkk also also for some time i went back to my wattpad phase for some reason and i started this fic which btw which WASN'T a 1d/harry fic (shore) but guess what....the mc was literally named harry and he was literally fancasted as him like ohk sureeeee whatever u say.....anyway it's safe to say that i didn't start it
omg dooo that!! if u wanna listen to just one song listen to this one and also troye's one of ur girls like>>>
and hasdfghgfd ik!! seeing u liveblog it on peach's blog rn sjsj and omg i wanna reread now aah
bitch i didn't even finish dark once i found out the smut isn't there yet cuz i knew if i finished it i would be begging for more and go insaneeee and helpppp why didn't i realize that??? like ofc he is a cult leader omg
omg webtoons?? that's niceeeee
and pls bother me i'm currently suffering while studying for my two tests tmrw ughhh kill me and noooo don't ghost ur so sexy aha
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[Harry x MC] Rain of stars. Part 1
Hello guys! I'm back again after a looong hiatus. This is the first part of my new fanfic about Harry.I've already told you that it's about the cold and rude Harry from the planet Cloudi, but it will get better and better as the story progresses. I'm also going to publish this same story on planet Sensitive (you can find me there with the same username libertyxm), in case you want to follow it from there. Anyway, I'll stop talking so much and let you enjoy the story. See you soon!
Liberty
"And this is all for today's class" that's the only sentence I paid attention to since the lesson started. I let out a sigh. I was tired after yesterday work shift and the last thing I wanted to do is have to assist a class at 8:00 a.m.
"I need coffee, like right now. A big cup with extra sugar, coffee, and caramel" I smiled at my best friend sitting next to me. "Okey but today's coffee is on you" I replied to her as we started our way to the cafeteria. " I know, I know... by the way, did you hear about that super famous film director visiting our faculty?" "Not really, and since when do you care about these things? " I asked my friend. " Because rumors said he is really handsome but sadly, he almost always covers his face with a horse mask" I laughed " A horse mask? come on, stop kidding me, who would go out with that" She rolled her eyes " I don't know, maybe he's afraid to blind us with his pretty face" We both laughed as the cashier was taking our order " Why is he coming?" I asked, suddenly curious. " It looks like he wants to take some scenes for a university students documentary... oh, our order is here"
After we took separate paths after we had been talking for a while since both of us had different subjects. As I headed to class, I opened my cell phone to check the status of my bank account. Seeing as how the situation was, I would probably have to work more hours or find something that paid me better. As I keep wondering about these thoughts I felt the impact of something (or rather someone) against me and I was near to taste the floor, but thanks to God, I could maintain my balance. The culprit? was a tall guy with short grey hair and deep blue eyes. Wow... so... handsome but guess what, he was looking at me with a frown on his face as if I had been the one who had attacked him.
I pulled myself together and stood in front of him waiting for my apology, but all I got was a snap and him dodging me to keep walking. "Excuse me, sir, have you not been taught manners?" I told him a little bit angry. "Why should I do it?" is all he said.
"Sir, you almost knocked me down" I pointed out the obvious "It was you who bumped into me" and he just walked away. I took a deep breath and tried to count to ten as I imagined what would happen if I threw my bag at him.
After a long day of classes and assignments, I went to the coffee shop I work in. In general, my coworkers are nice but there was this guy called David who always piss me off. For him, I make everything wrong. Somedays I just take it and shut up, but others… well it's better not to talk about it right now.
Today, although I had to work alone for a few hours, it was not crowded and I could relax a little.
"I would like to take an americano and black tea, please" I took the order before I look at the two men in front of me but when I looked up, I was stunned to recognise the same blue-eyed boy from this morning.
We both gave each other withering glances before I start to work on their order. If it wasn't for the workers' code and my contract… I let out a sigh, trying to get out of my state of frustration but, exactly two minutes later, the boy was standing in front of me with that "I hate you" expression of his.
"What's wrong?" I asked and I wish I hadn't. "The tea, it doesn't taste good." "Okay, what have I got to do with it?" "You're the one who made it, so I demand good tea."
I gave her a withering look before taking a deep breath for the fifth time this day.
"Sir, either be more specific with what you want or I won't be able to help you."
"Throw it away, it's useless to come here for a drink" Maybe the best solution would have been to shut up, smile and offer him another one that suits his taste, but by the time I realised, I had already thrown the tea (which was already cold) on top of his shoes. Well... at least I did the shut up part, right?...
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why am i seeing this picture where you're dragging me into 'family night horror marathon' and i'm just sitting there surrounded by people who absolutely adores the movies (you, ayato) or is indifferent & unspooked (zhongli) by it- welp time to hide in my hubby's chest good night-
comfort can be found in zhongli's arms oh yes what a wonderful liyue proverb huh wdym it's not a real proverb?
'brats with brains' hhshdksjdksjdlsjslsjdlajsa lmaoooo i-yeah, suuuure, you definitely look like a hostage and you're totally not enjoying this situation at all- /s /j
honestly charms sounds like such a fun subject but so does transfiguration!! perhaps i'd teach either one of those 🤔 DEFINITELY NOT quidditch or anything physical lmao- zhongli definitely teaches something like history of magic.... OH in the event that he's part dragon in this au, perhaps care of magical creatures? i also see ayato excelling in dada for some reason 👀... i would be that teacher who feels guilty about taking off points from the houses so yall are safe hahahah zhongli though... unfortunately if you break a rule no one can save you from the "i am disappointed" three hours lecture + a reflection essay + points deduction combo....
it's definitely the earthy color palette and his voice hsldjfksd ayato looks cozy to cuddle too yeye and since he wears lots of layers he can take a layer off and use it as a blanket as you two snooze hehehe
there it is, the public announcement!!!! certified scara kisser!!! don't make ayato too jealous or else he might play hard to get when you pull for him- i have yet to play the archon quest (as usual lskjfksdj) he's still a baby bc i don't have him built yet but he's still so fun to play look at him nyooming about:
LMAO IS IT REALLY HAHAHAH i am avoiding his leaks bc i am a masochist and want to be surprised :p thank you for your well wishes i wish you luck on ayato and ei's banner and i hope your beloved comes home to you twice <3 <3 <3 omg lia whale era???? lol go lia go!!!
gacha itinerary: packed. wallet condition: flat. *cries*
we demand durians in al haitham's burst hyv-
yes, a family horror movie night marathon and we're leaving alhaitham and scara outside to be soaked in the rain. except for the scara, the man has a multi-purpose hat on him. meanwhile heizou just invited himself in thru the window.
"comfort can be found in the arms of a man named zhongli." we should send a document to the liyue qixing to make this an official proverb >:) but ik the both of us are too self-conscious for that, so let's bribe hu tao to do it for us LMAOOO (or not, this proverb seems like it's a lost verse from the holy book of simping 101 /j)
i'm sorry, rin jie, bur i'd be the student who makes silly faces at you whenever we make eye contact... it's a necessity. hu tao was the one who encouraged me (/j) AND OOO, WHY NOT BOTH?? zhongli, the professor who teaches the history of magic but can be found as a guest lecturer of some sort during care of magical creatures 👀 i just know ge's gonna be super invested when the harry potter equivalent (mc??) of the genshin potter au fights against that dragon in the goblet of fire competition like hey, he gotta concentrate on this harry potter equivalent vs a kin of his match LMAOOOO
(and true, your puppy eyes may sway him, but his bond with justice and forthrightness is smth else entirely <//3 a long lecture and reflection essay and points off... the students are known to shuffle their pace when prof zhongli passes by. and he is just like "good morning, children— meimei, are they running away from me. why are they running away.")
ayato being a defence against the dark arts prodigy... oh lord, i can feel that smile on his face ALREADY. and he is the type to cast charms while maintaining this refined pose like he is doing steps to a dance. it deffo reminds me of how elegant he is in his in-game normal attacks, hehe. speaking of, did you get him?? oml, i'm praying so hard you did but if not: guaranteed alhaitham, where you at <3 hfkwrkks but he played a lil hard to get and came home at 79 pity! i also won 50/50 for ei on 78 pity and the high from getting two five-stars in a row is smth else, i swear 😭 i'm having loads of fun playing an electro-charged team with the both of them + kazuha as buff + zhongli as a shield (ofc, i gotta appreciate the grandpa for coming home at literally 1 pity) !!
NYOOM. NYOOM. istg, scara is deffo #1 on my pull list now that i already have ayato and ei. HE WILL BE MINE. and i shall wait for his rerun (even tho it's not soon)! scara is deffo one of the best dps' in the game rn, but i mostly want him for emotional attachment purposes jfjwkkfke. i'll try to pull for several more charas until i lose 50/50 — then, it'll be chill saving time until scara rerun! >:) i hope you get to do the archon quest soon btw! or force your brother to do it for you if he's bored, let's use the opportunity (/j)
#i need to go on my pc so i can show you a pic of my ayato smiling#and i hope you feel better soon :( take your time! <3#ask box! 📬#visitor: dearest rin! 💠#cw: selfships
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mars reads too much dreamnotfound fanfiction for their own good
a dreamnotfound fanfic recommendation list by your resident dumbass (me)
this took way to fucking long... i’m tired
below is a (very extensive) list dedicated to all my favorite dnf fics, ranging from quick one shots to 100k+ word monstrosities that devour the storage on my computer, forever incomplete masterpieces to ongoing works of art, you get the idea. i provided links for each fic/series for your reading pleasure. there will be no smutty/nsfw fics on this list, that’s just not my vibe lmao. this list goes in no particular order, and i’ll update it from time to time when i feel like it. now, without further ado, let us begin.
Heat Waves (complete) by tbhyourelame
(wtf else did you expect, looking at a dnf rec list?) amazingly well written, and while it’s not my favorite dnf fic it’s damn near close. in the midst of a brutal heatwave, a suffering dream comes to terms with the fact that he is desperately in love with his best friend. everything i could say about this fic has already been said by nearly everyone who’s read it, so if you haven’t yet caved into the hype, just go for it. you won’t be disappointed.
Gonna be around (completed) by georgescatcafe
(mc irl) my favorite dnf oneshot to date. just read it, i don’t wanna spoil for you :)
Inferno in the Sky (ongoing)by zairielon
(star wars au) an ongoing star wars au currently clocking in at almost 200k words. need I say more? everything about it absolutely slaps, each chapter is amazingly written, and it’s just good. also, can we just appreciate dream and tubbos dynamic in here? 10/10, amazing, must protecc. oh right, a summary: george, an exiled padawan turned engineer, must return to the jedi temple after attacks on it from an unknown assailant threaten the safety of himself and the other jedi.
Like Magic (ongoing) by KangarooKen, NotGra55 (Gra55)
(harry potter au) the unofficial official dnf harry potter au. we watch the young unlikely wizard pair grow up together throughout their years at hogwarts as they battle good old fashioned wizard racism. beautifully written, incredibly fun and suspenseful, and just an overall blast and a half.
GeorgeNotFound, Son of Poseidon, and the League of Minor Gods (ongoing) by Clichewho_69, Cygnvs, Trash_Kinggg
(percy jackson au) percy jackson au? check. “road trip” (technically quest but u get what i mean)? check. enemies to friends to lovers? check. this fic follows the plot of the lightning theif (albeit loosely), but everything is explained enough where you don’t have to read percy jackson to understand what’s going on. basically after moving to the usa, george gets taken to camp halfblood where he learns that a) gods exist. b) he’s the son of poseidon and c) he needs to prove that he didn’t steal zeus’s master bolt.
Protected (completed) by aenqua
(royalty/camelot au) my favorite piece of dnf media of all time. dubbed the official dnf camelot au, where dream is the heir to the throne and george is a servants son with a secret that couldp get him killed. these childhood friends grow up together and learn trust, love, and acceptance. (that summary did not justice to the masterpiece that is this fic) here’s the directors cut
The Hunter (completed) by HederEgo
(mc irl) a choose your own adventure fic with 13 different endings, where dream the hunter must kill george and stop him from beater the ender dragon. enough said.
The official dream team cowboy AU (series)(ongoing) by antsu_in_my_pantsu
(cowboy au) cowboys and outlaws horses and shit. and the big gay. it’s a cowboy au, what else did you expect? fucking yee haw (all seriousness this is a great read, i loved it so so so so much and i can’t wait for the final chapter to release).
This is a Drista moment, let's just accept it (completed) by Qekyo
dnf fic from drista pov. considering its unique perspective, it’s perfectly done. beautifully showcases a sibling relationship through drista and her memories/moments with dream, and it just works, y’a know? also drista supremacy.
Dear Dream (completed) by Qekyo
(wwii au) i don’t cry when watching/reading anything sad. translation: i’m a heartless bitch. however, this fic is the only exception. it caused me to cry so hard my mom walked in my room and asked if i was ok. ‘nuff said.
TECHNOlogical Wingman (completed) by Closeted_Bookworm
techno is the autocorrect ai on dreams phone, and he gains sentience. interesting concept, and the author fucking nailed it. great fic.
It Was Only a Fic (ongoing) by imagineitdear
dream starts reading a dnf fanfic (we’ve all been there buddy).
Teacher’s Pet (ongoing) by niyuha
(teacher au) in which dream is a high school english teacher and george is the new comp sci teacher in room 297.
Saltwater Secrets (ongoing) by earlgay_milktea
(mermaid/high school au) a great example of the shear amount of variety in fics this fandom has to offer. when i started reading dnf fics i would have never thought i’d find one about a mermaid george hopelessly crushing on his human friend, who happens to be his schools star swimmer. yet here i am, and i am far from disappointed.
Smash My Heart (incomplete) by dontrollthedice
george and sapnap are commentators for duper smash brothers tournaments, and george develops a crush on an up and coming smash streamer named dream.
roleplaying in the dark is harder than it seems (completed) by Alienu
laser tag. 10/10
solar system (completed) by quartzfia
(mc irl) george vists dream in pandora’s vault.
Ramblings of a Lunatic (completed) by jungkooksfic
ahh communicating through a notebook left on a shelf in a bookstore- what a perfect way to start a relationship.
Paint me like your French Girls (It's Charcoal, Actually) (completed) by Turtle_ier
(artist au) george is an art student, and dream is a model.
00:00:00 (completed) by isleofdreams
(soulmate au) 00:00:00 is the moment you meet your soulmate, as indicated but the clock ticking down on your wrist until the moment you meet. i’m not a fan of soulmate aus; this fic is the exception.
Blue Skies Smilin' At Me (completed) by kivy
(artist au) i don’t usually cry while reading stuff, but this brought me damn near close. george is a painting conservator and chats it is with the ghost of the artist if the painting he is working on. they fall in a love.
Current Location (incomplete) by hendollana
(influencer au) george simps for a hot american instagram model. who knew he’d actually follow back?
The Withering (series) (series ongoing, 1 work completed) by App1e_Juice
(mc irl) lore and world building and fight scenes and everything i crave. what’s not to love? something starts making the plants and crops around dreams village wither, and must team up with new friends to find the cause of the mysterious disease plaguing the land.
Minecraft, But You Can't Leave (complete) by facadecake
(mc irl) dream and george are sucked into their own private minecraft world together and must beat the game to escape.
Free The Game, Beat the End (incomplete) by goatgoatwasfound
(mc irl) a glitch in minecraft causes thousands of players from around the world to be trapped inside minecraft, with only one way of escape- beating the ender dragon. first dnf fic i ever read, and it’s still 10/10 for me.
Why don't you come a little closer? (completed) by lifeofandoms
george gets stood up by a date, and Dream pretends he’s the date to save george from the embarrassment. simply adorable.
lightning bug (completed) by saintachesP
(band au) while on tour, dream realizes his feeling for george.
Hold me closer (completed) by Treesofmyheart
(mc irl/dsmp) i just,, really like this trope.
Dizzy on caffeine (completed) by GleamingGreenGoggles
(coffee shop au) best dnf coffeeshop au i’ve read. periodt.
living a life of crime isn’t always easy (series) (completed) by itisjosh
(mafia/assassin au) stockholm syndrome except it’s not weird.
Inhibitions Make Interesting Situations (completed) by Ship_On_The_Sea
i pissed myself laughing. it’s just a dream and george being hilariously dense, flustered idiots. serotonin central.
thy eternal summer shall not fade (completed) by gracequills
(high school au) that moment when you recite shakespeare to your crush in your ap lit class instead of confessing (hate it when that happens).
All is Fair in love and Football (ongoing) by graciegirl2001
(college au) #1 favorite college au. in which george is a cheerleader, and dream is the football teams rising star player. this one gets extra points because of the amazing karlnap moments sprinkled throughout. *chefs kisses air*
online love (completed) by andbutso
(high school au) online classes go zoooooooom
Can’t help falling (completed) by isleofdreams
dream re-learns the guitar to sing to george on his birthday. beautiful. fluffy. amazing
dance in the rain and my arms (completed) by lazy_kitkat
george is a rain god, and dream is a wind god
Weather Boy (completed) by DaintyDiizzle
wouldn't you like to know, weather boy? (where dream can control the rain)
The color orange (completed) by anon
(mc irl) dream describes the colors of a sunset
Family Mode (completed)by Strawberry_flavoured_tears
they’re dads :,)
Breathing Room (incomplete) by papercranes
(band an) an amazing band au. the mad lad author wrote original songs for each chapter. above and beyond, mad props :). unfortunately, it’s incomplete
Piece of Clay (completed) by carbonbrine
(artist au) george is a sculptor and his sculpture comes to life- but oh no he’s hot.
Try (completed) by Not4typicalwriter
(royalty au) george must choose a suitor, but none of them are up to dream, his head knights, standards. or dream is hella jelly. also protective dream is perfect
When the Roses Bloom (completed) by HederEgo
(royalty au) close second for my favorite fic. go to royalty au for a quick serotonin bost. it’s all fluff and flowers and crushes, and i love it. criminally underrated.
Heavenstruck (ongoing) by dontrollthedice
george is dreams guardian angel, and dream want to find out more about him and his past life. bittersweet :,)
Bang and Burn (completed) by App1e_Juice
(spy au) george accidentally falls for target number 1 on sapnap’s secret agency’s hit list. this ones great, i love me a spy au :)
Can I get a uhh… (completed) by lemonskies
dream keeps pulling up to the drive through mcdonald’s that george works at drunk.
Pretty Stranger (completed) by anon
when looking for dream in the terminal, george sees a cute guy and decides to flirt.
Take my Hand (completed) by latinbias
(royalty au) another royalty au? poggers. surprise twists? double poggers. love this a lot.
seconds, minutes, hours, lifetimes (complete) by meridies
ROAD TRIP ROAD TRIP ROAD TRIP ROAD TRIP *inhales to compose herself* roadtrip au. unrequited love, ignored feelings, longing, pining, you know the drill. absolutely love this one, its the best roadtrip au i have ever read, in any fandom. (maybe cause i identify with it a little too much, but thats not important. whats important is that you read this fic. right now. im waiting).
Message redacted (complete) by justyouraverageloser
(text fic) dream asks for a girls number and realises hes been given the wrong number. however, an unexpected relationship starts to form between him and the stranger on the other end of the line.
the waves (completed) by anon
(mc irl) this fic was written by the same anon who wrote the color orange, which is up there on my fav dnf oneshot list. dream and george know they have a higher purpose. they don’t know where they came from, or why they are seemingly the only humans in the world, or how they feel about eachother, or even where the skeletons come from, but they are sure of one thing: they have to beat a dragon.
The Dream Doll (completed) by PeppDream (Pep_Pizza)
(voodoo i guess) i’m a real big fan of fics with really out there or unique concepts, so naturally this one makes the cut! i really liked it, it’s really sweet and made me think a lot about what matters to me in the world. george finds a strange doll in an antique shop, and would really like to just stuff it in a drawer and forget about it. sadly (?), the doll has other plans.
last updated February 6th, 2021
#dnf#dreamnotfound#dream not found#dreamnotfound fic#dreamnotfound fanfic#dreamnotfound fanfiction#dnf fic#dnf fanfic#dnf fanfiction#dnf fic rec#dreamnotfound fanfiction recommendations#dreamwastaken#georgenotfound#i’m ok i swear#i read too much fanfiction#i should probably go to bed
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Memory lane
Book: Bloodbound
Pairing: Adrian Raines x MC
Warning: a few slightly mention of death and a bit angst but mostly fluff, fluff and more fluff!
Words: 2141
**Tags in the reblog**
"You were a chubby baby, love." He chuckled at her indignant face.
"I was not!" She looked at the picture he was holding. "Look at me. Super cute."
"That too." Adrian smiled, kissing the side of her head. For some reason, her parents had decided to send her a box with old pictures of her growing up. They were sitting on the floor of their living room, going through them as she placed them on the rug. "How old were you here?" He picked up one in which a young Amy was sitting on the middle of her bed, legs crossed, crying with a book open on her lap.
"Around 14, I think? Maybe 15." She gently held his hand, turning the picture in her direction. "I was reading the last book of Harry Potter, the part where Fred Weasley died." She watched it in detail, a nostalgic smile on her face. "He was my favorite. I was so pissed off at J.K. Rowling afterwards."
"Who took it?"
"My dad." A little sigh came out from her. "He stood in my door and took it before I noticed, then he gave me a chocolate that he had bought for himself that day. After that, I called him 'Lupin' for almost two weeks."
His eyes studied the photo. "Your nose still puckers the same way when you cry."
"Really?"
"Yes. It's adorable." He leaned down, kissed the tip of her nose and put the image on the rug with the rest. "Since then chocolate is your comfort food?" He always loved to learn little things about her.
"Yeah but I prefer it with wine now." She winked, taking another one from the box. "I didn't remember this one…" He stared at the image from over her shoulder. There was teenage Amy and a woman a lot older than her. "That's my grandma, Suzanne. She always used to put 15 or 20 dollars in my pocket when she hugged me." She grinned at the memory.
"You seem happy." He wrapped her waist with his arm. Amy almost never talked about her family and, for what she had told him, her relationship with them wasn't good, especially with her mother.
"I was. We were celebrating my dad's birthday so grandma was visiting us." She fondly observed the old lady's face that was tightly holding her as they both laughed for the camera. "My dad joked that she had brought a bigger gift for me than for him, even if it was his birthday." She stood in silence, lost in her memories. "She was the best."
"She seems lovely." Amy leaned her back closer to his chest as the hand of the arm around her rested on her hip. "You definitely have her smile."
"You think so?"
"Of course. Yours is more beautiful but the resemblance is there."
"I like that." She looked at it again and placed it in the pile she wanted to have more handy. "Good answer by the way." She craned her head to the side, lifting her face as her lips found his half way. "I wish I could see pictures of you. I bet you were an adorable baby and boy."
"I remember that my mother used to say I looked like my father but that my personality was similar to hers."
"A killer combination if you ask me." He grinned at her words.
"Glad you approved it, love." A picture called his attention so he picked up. "What's the story behind this one?" Her eyes widened in horror.
"Oh no! I thought I had destroyed all of them!" She looked around 16 or 17 years old, using a pair of black ripped jeans, a crop top and a leather jacket. She had some strands of hair colored in bright pink and purple and her eyes were makeup with thick black eyeliner and fake piercings on her nose, lip and belly button. She was sticking her tongue out and lifting her middle finger. She tried to take it but he lifted his arm out of her reach. "Adrian!"
"I'm sorry my love, but I'm going to keep this one for myself." He smirked as she narrowed her eyes.
"Don't you dare!" She sat on his lap.
"I might make some HD backup copies as well."
"Oh my god, no, you won't!" He laughed and lost his balance, falling on his back, holding her waist, keeping her away from the picture.
"And digitally it too."
"Give it to me!" He rolled them, pinning her, smiling down to her.
"No matter what, you always are gorgeous, Amy." Adrian lowered himself, taking her lips with his as her fingers ran between the locks of his hair. "But I still will keep it." He slipped the pic in his back pocket.
"Ugh, you can be terrible sometimes." A mischievous grin blossomed on her face. "You know this means war, right?" She took her phone, rapidly writing a text, showing it to him once she was done. It was the chat with Kamilah asking her for the copies of his old silent movies. "Last chance, handsome." He shook his head amused and pressed send. He knew she wanted to watch them anyway.
"Completely worth it." She left the phone beside them, smiling as her hands guided his face towards hers. "Was it during your rebel phase?" He asked as they were sitting again.
"Yeah…" She took another photo. "It was the result of a terrible mix between Avril Lavigne, Green Day, a bored teenager in a small town and Twilight." He chuckled. "I guess I always had a thing for the vampires." She grinned up to him and gave him a sly wink.
"Lucky me." She laughed as he pulled her closer. The box was almost empty as she reached the last couple of pictures there. In one of them she was walking, carrying a huge bouquet of flowers.
"I didn't know this photo existed…" She quietly said, her eyebrows knitting together with confusion. "I don't even know who took it."
"Do you know when it was taken?" She passed the pic to him. She was beautiful, no trace of her rebel phase, but her gaze was extremely sad.
"It was one month before my 18th birthday."
"You remember that day?" She nodded.
"It was the first time I went to the cemetery where my grandma rested. I brought those flowers for her. She passed away early that year." She looked at it a few more moments and left it in the pile to store. "She used to mediate between my mother and I so, after that, we barely talked to each other anymore."
"I'm sorry." He placed a strand behind her ear pressing a kiss on her forehead as she smiled again.
"Don't be. A couple weeks later, I moved to the college's campus and, even if things didn't change with her, everything got better. I made a lot of friends, I keep talking with my dad..." Her eyes locked with his. "And four years later, I met you." She enfolded his cheek with her right hand, warming his skin and leaving a sweet caress. "And you make incredibly happy every single day, Adrian. More than I ever thought was possible."
"I could say the same about you, Amy. I haven't been this blissful in almost 300 years." He kissed her palm, lacing his fingers with hers. "I haven't loved, laughed or felt this much since I was human. You, my love, are the most bright and wonderful light that I never expected to have in my life and that every day I'm grateful for."
"I love you, handsome."
"I love you too, Amy." She sat with her back against his chest as he hugged her.
She took the last photo. It seemed more recent, her hair was like now and her face was almost the same as the present. She was holding a baby, smiling down at them, tickling their neck. "This one is a couple months before you hired me."
"Doesn't look like New York, it's back home?"
"Mhm. I was worried that maybe I had to leave New York and a few days before Emma, a high school friend, had invited me to her birthday so I went back for the weekend to distract me a bit. She even invited me to stay at her place." She pointed to a redhead woman standing near to her. "That's her."
"You were closer in high school?" She laughed, shaking her head a little, amusement.
"Not at all. We hated each other at first." She showed him a tall guy in the back. "Because of him, Michael. We both had a huge crush on him during our first year." She smiled at the memory. "We both tried to win him over but we didn't realize a little detail." She moved her finger to the man standing beside Michael. "He was in love with Sean." Adrian chuckled alongside her. "They started to date and had been together since then and, with a little time, Emma and I became friends. I talked with her a few days ago."
"At least something good resulted from it."
"My friendship with her?"
"No." He squeezed her waist. "I met you single." He grinned as she giggled. "And the baby?"
"It's Kylie, Michael and Sean adopted her. She was around a year there, I think." She took her phone again, opening Instagram, searching for a specific post. "They shared this adorable photo a couple of days ago." She showed him the screen where a little brunette girl was sitting on the floor with a puppy. "She's so cute."
"She is." There was a silent pause while she closed the app and left the phone on the rug again. "Amy."
"Yeah?" She was putting the pile to store back in the box.
"Before all this, did you want to have kids of your own?" She noticed the pinch of guilt in his voice.
"For a time, yes." She sighed. "I always thought I wanted to be the mother I wished I had growing up." She put the lid on the box, leaving out the ones she wanted to keep closer to her. "But I would have changed my opinion anyway."
"Why is that?"
"When Dimitrius told me, well… Everything, I realized that, if I had a kid, it would be a bloodkeeper like me and… It can be a lot." She moved the things to the side, stretching her back a bit. "In one of the memories that Kano showed me, I was playing around in a park, I think I was 8,9? Around there. Suddenly I had a vision… I don't remember what it was about but it scared my young self a lot. She ran away crying." She leaned down, resting her head on his lap, watching him. "I'm glad that ended with me."
"You would have been an amazing mother." His voice was soft and sweet.
"Thank you, handsome." She took his hand, caressing the back of it with her thumb. "Are you okay? I know it is a hard topic for you."
"I'm perfect, my love. Don't worry." He ran his fingers through her hair, making a bit of pressure on her scalp, leaving a gentle massage there.
"Can I ask you a question?"
"Always." He leaned his back against the couch.
"Have you thought about being a parent again? Adopting or something like that?"
"...No. But not only because of Charles."
"No?"
"Of course his death influenced the decision a time ago, but it was more than that. After my Turning, I barely had time to process everything, to grieve, I became Gaius' soldier almost instantly." He sighed, sorrowful. "I was surrounded and consumed by darkness for decades." He noticed sadness in her factions at his words, squeezing his hand supportly. "I couldn't think of something like that and there wasn't anybody that I wanted to do that journey with, to have that kind of compromise."
"And now?" He smiled at her, lacing her fingers with his, squeezing it.
"Now I'm open to the idea, if that is something you want."
"I might have thought about it a couple of times." She started to distractly play with his fingers. "Maybe not right now but… I love the idea of starting a family with you someday."
"Me too, Amy." His hand lowered from her hair to her cheek. "It's a wonderful sentiment."
"I'm glad." Her face twirled into his hold, kissing his palm. They stood like that in a content and comfortable silence. "It's nice, right? That we can tell each other what we want…"
"I'm not going to return the photo, love." He smirked, seeing where she was going with it.
"Oh come on!" She buffed, crossing her arms. "Damn it."
"Nice try."
✨
#adrian raines x mc#adrian raines#adrian x mc#adrian x amy#choices stories you play#playchoices#pixelberry#choices fanfiction#choices#choices bloodbound
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cloudbusting; part five.
a classic coffee shop story. harry is a painter that quickly becomes a regular at his neighbourhood cafe, and it just might have something to do with a certain barista. cloudy mornings, gallery openings, and rooms full of paintings.
pairing: harry x reader
warnings: language, mentions of anxiety
words: 8.9k
series masterlist
art by holly warburton. (i have no vision for the mc of the fic, people in the images of paintings i use are purely because this is how i envision harry’s art to be)
a/n: i am so excited (and nervous) to share this chapter but she is here ! amazingly big thank you to tina @sunflowers-styles for beta-ing, you are the best ily💕 ! as always please share if you can, and let me know your thoughts, i love to here everything you have to say !!🍊💕 happy reading xoxo
The clouds that came in seemed to have doubled, growing bigger and darker as a cool wind came with them.
The change in weather was quick, summer seeming to slip right out from under you as fall settled into the air. Although, the change was welcomed. There was always something about the sun glowing in the sky while the air was cool. But this was not one of those fall days, no today was damp and misty and not at all pleasant.
That Saturday morning, there was a light rain when you woke up for the mid-shift that you had to cover since apparently your coworkers didn’t know how to give notice before deciding they couldn’t work.
“What time are you off?” Your brother asked, as you were taking a bite out of the jam covered toast you had made yourself before needing to run off to work.
“Three,” you called between bites.
“I can come meet you when you're off if you’d like,” he said, joining you in your kitchen. “Might bring in my laptop, get some work done.”
You nodded. “That sounds good,” taking a quick glance out the window, you faced him once more. “Hopefully it’ll be slow today considering the weather.”
“Fuck,” you muttered quickly, half a slice of toast in your hand as you caught a glance of the time from the clock on the oven. “I gotta go. I left you the key on the table if you want to head out and I’ll see you this afternoon!”
You called to your sibling who was behind you as you grabbed your jacket and bag from where you had left them on the couch. “Sorry again about this.”
“Don’t worry about it,” he replied, looking through your recently filled fridge. “I have some things to get done so it works out well.”
With a hurried goodbye, you were out the door and rushing down the street. You always left maybe a minute too late and ended up having to power-walk to work. The morning air was chilly and just wet, overall unpleasant and not doing much to up your mood.
You hadn’t slept well at all the night before.
You were unable to sleep after the hole you had dug for yourself from your Instagram deep dive, your mind not shutting up about everything that happened within the past two months – the past two months with Harry.
You were feeling this small twinge from the back of your mind, something that was getting louder and louder in your head. A small hint of a voice that you knew was your own, that was telling you that you should be afraid.
And after all the emotional exhaust from the previous day, you had to go make small talk with person after person which was something you just really weren’t looking forward to.
“What are you doing here?” Saya asked when she saw you turn in past the counter and into the back room to hang your coat and bag. You were happy to see that there weren’t a lot of patrons, and that Saya seemed relaxed with the morning so far.
“I’m covering for Noah,” you told her as you clocked in, not even aware of the way your eyes scanned over the work space to look for anything that needed to be done.
“Of course he’s off,” she muttered under her breath, herself having her own issues with being unable to say no when people asked her to cover for them. “Weren’t you supposed to have the week off?”
You nodded. “The whole week, yeah. Grace is going to cover one of my shifts so I’ll have an extra day off, which is nice. But my brother is visiting and I just –” you sighed, “don’t feel like being here.”
“I get that,” Saya shot you a smile as you made yourself a big hot latte. “It’ll be okay, I don’t think today will be that busy.”
And boy was she wrong.
Seemingly minutes after your conversation, a steady flow of clients came in. The steady flow turned into a rush, which again never seemed to end. You didn’t know why everyone was out and about, wanting coffee on this cloudy September morning, and why they couldn’t just be at home.
Saya, the angel she was, took the orders while you rushed through making drinks. It was arguably more stressful to be the one making drinks, but it also meant you didn’t have to talk to people as much. At ten-thirty, Aleena came in as well, and joined your side in making drinks so it became a bit more bearable.
Your brother had come in at the height of the rush, lucky to find a spot in the back to sit at and do whatever work he needed, as he drank the americano you’d made for him.
Luckily the noon lull came, as it often did, and you had a small moment to catch your breath and do some tidying up before it inevitably got busy again.
You walked around with the dish bin against your hip, and it quickly got heavier as you filled it with utensils people had neglected to bring back. A man then very rudely grabbed your arm, stopping you in your tracks to ask you where the washroom was and you were muttering under your breath in annoyance as you balanced the bin to pick up a stack of plates.
“Hey,” a voice that you hadn’t expected to hear, and one that you were trying to keep out of your head, was suddenly sounding next to you.
Head whipping up to where it came from, you pushed some of your hair out of the way after placing the plates along with the other dishes in the bin.
“Oh, um –” you said, a bit dumbly. “Hey.”
“Surprised to see you here again – I remember how you said you had a week off.” Harry said, standing tall and beautiful and everything you didn’t need to be reminded of right now.
“Covering again,” was all you said, avoiding his gaze. The dish bin in your hands felt like it was growing heavier and heavier, and provided you the perfect excuse to step away from the conversation.
“I got to um,” you lifted the bin in your hands, wordlessly telling him you needed to empty out the bin.
“Oh, of course,” he nodded with a tiny furrow in his brow that you didn’t have time to analyse as you kept your eyes on the small line up that had re-formed in front of the till.
You stepped past him, quickly disappearing behind the door of the back room, where the dishwasher sat ready to be loaded.
Just as you were stepping out after rinsing the dishes and loading the washer, you were heading out from the back room when someone stopped you again.
A call of your name made you jump slightly, a small ‘jesus’ leaving your mouth before you turned to see Harry slightly invading the employee space of the café as he tried to reach out to you.
“Sorry,” he spoke, after seeing your small bit of shock. “I wanted – are you alright?”
You hated yourself for the passive answer. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
“Oh I just,” he paused, a slight furrow between his brow. “You seemed stressed yesterday…”
You shook your head, teeth pinching the corner of your bottom lip. “I’m fine.”
Seeing his mouth part open to speak once more, you were quick to cut him off with a motion towards the register. “I should get back – busy day.”
And then you were off without sparing him a second glance. Your heart rose to a lump in your throat, a nauseated feeling taking over your stomach that you didn’t think was due to the coffee intake.
You rejoined Aleena by the espresso machine, and saw that she in fact was not busy and was just wiping off sparse grounds from the counter top, and cleaning out milk pots.
You helped her, cleaning out the already clean baskets again to occupy yourself as you knew from the corner of your eye that Harry had walked to the till to order something and that would mean his next stop would be counter by the espresso machine to pick up his drink.
Letting Aleena make the drinks, you bent down to rearrange the mugs that sat under the counter to occupy yourself. When you stood back up to your feet after completing the menial task, you stumbled back away from the counter lightly due to the small head rush, and to the fact that Harry was leaning forward across the counter, forearms lightly resting against it.
“Doesn’t look too busy.” Although his words seemed to have a small bite to them, his tone was light and maybe the punch wasn’t intentional.
“It was…” you stated weakly, eyes briefly flitting over his before looking back down again.
There was a small pause, one far too uncomfortable for you to deal with, especially with Aleena right next to you and other customers on the other side of the counter.
“Are you upset with me? He asked you directly, his words causing you to glance back up at him.
“No, I –” you paused, unsure of what to say and not wanting to say it here. Waving your hand in a motion for him to follow, you turned on your feet and headed to the space before the back room, where the floor of the café met the floor from behind the counter.
Harry followed you from the other side, meeting you where he had stopped you a mere couple minutes ago to talk – something that seemed like you couldn’t avoid at the moment.
“Are you okay?” He repeated the question from before, as you leaned your side against the wall, arms crossed over your chest.
“Yeah, I’m just a bit stressed I guess,” you said lamely, fingers fidgeting with the hem of your sleeves. “A lot going on.”
He slowly nodded, as if not convinced by your words. “Did you want to do something after your shift, blow off some steam and relax?”
Shaking your head no, eyes dropping away from his as you couldn’t bear to look at him in the eye anymore. “I can’t, my brother is with me for the weekend.”
You darted your eyes over to where your brother actually sat not far off, oblivious to the interaction unfolding near him with his eyes glued to his laptop.
“Right, sorry I forgot.” His voice was quiet, words being followed with another moment of silence that you wished to skip through, the only noise coming from other voices in the cafe and Comment te dire Adieu playing a bit too loudly.
“Are you sure you’re alright?” He probed for the third time, the frustration in his tone starting to seep through.
“I am,” you didn’t know if he caught the slight shake in your tone, the slight shake that completely contradicted the words to leave your mouth.
“It’s just,” you paused again, all words seeming to fall out of your head as you were unable to form a sentence. Either that, or you were holding back what was about to blurt from your mouth. “I think that –
He sighed your name. “You think what? Did you want me to leave, or something?”
“I – what do you mean?”
“I don’t know, you…” he ran his free hand over his forehead, pushing some hair out the way. With a little sigh, he glanced at you again. “You’re acting like you want nothing to do with me.”
The nausea was rising from your stomach to your throat.
“I think that um, maybe you should go.”
He didn’t move. “Where is this coming from?” There was a small crack in his tone, one that made your eyes shut for a moment too long as you willed yourself not to get visibly upset.
“I’m tired… I’m tired of being someone that people just pass through.”
You dared to cast a glance at his expression, seeing a deep pull in his brows and a frown on his lips. It hurt you more than you’d like to admit.
You liked him – probably more than you’d had liked anyone, but that was something that you couldn’t think too much about. You liked him a lot and you were so afraid that your first instinct was to run and hide. You knew very well that you were succumbing to your own insecurities, that you were picking and pulling at any loose thread that could be used as a valid reason for your fears.
“What are you saying?” He asked, frustration growing in his voice as he silently begged you to look up at him. “I don’t – I don’t understand what you’re saying.”
“I just – I’m tired Harry.” You sighed, worrying the inside of your mouth. “I’m tired of being hurt…”
Voice not sounding like your own, you spoke words that were about to bring tears to your eyes. “I think you should go.”
You saw his expression twist in every which way, but he only shot you a curt nod before turning on his feet and walking away from you just as you’d suggested. It was the last thing you had wanted to see, but at the moment, at work, you couldn’t deal with anything more than that.
Taking a brief moment, you begged yourself not to start crying for the thousandth time. You made sure not to watch him leave, knowing that it would only hurt you more. Instead you watched his figure walk through the door from the corner of your eye, seeing him turn a quick corner and disappearing you’re your sight. You had no idea when you would see him again.
Wordlessly joining Aleena, you picked up one of the order slips and read over the list of three personalized drinks. Hands moving on muscle memory alone, you cleaned out espresso filled baskets and pulled two shots to start preparing the drinks.
You let your mind wander just the slightest as you steamed milk, thinking about the way you had just completely sabotaged yourself. You knew you had your own reasons for it, as crazy as they may seem.
The slight screeching sound of the milk growing too hot brought your attention back to your task. You watched as the milk was just about to bubble out of the jug, quickly twisting the dial on the steam wand to turn it off. You poured the milk as you always did into the to-go cup, with a nice little rosetta for the customer with the medium latte, before you repeated the same action over and over, making drink after drink.
You also knew that any fear you had over Harry’s ex was probably overly thought of, something that you shouldn’t be thinking about, but you just couldn’t help it. The self-deprecating part of you just didn’t see Harry wanting you to be that person to him, as much as you maybe wanted to.
So you continued to steam milk, working in perfect unison with Aleena as the workflow picked up again
Your shift continued as it always did, with nothing out of the ordinary, and soon three o’clock was rolling in and you were free to leave and do all the wallowing you could ever want to do from the peace and calm of your own room. You left along with your brother, who said he had gotten all the work that needed to be accomplished just in time.
You walked in silence side-by-side down the street, with a tea in hand from work to warm you up and your brother with another coffee. The sky was swirling with dark greys and blues, the smell of rain high in the air as if a downpour was ready to come at any moment.
“Who was that, earlier on?” Your brother asked, after a moment.
You held in a breath. “Who?”
“The guy you were talking to, in the cafe. You looked upset.”
“He’s just,” you paused. “A friend. Or we were friends, I don’t know.” You muttered, your eyes stuck on the ground as the both of you walked together.
Your brother was quiet for a second from next to you, and you thought that you had been vague enough for him to drop the subject, but no such luck. “Did you guys date?”
Pausing, again you weren’t sure how to answer. “Not really.”
Looking at your sibling next to you, you saw him watching you with a little furrow between his brows. “What do you mean, not really?”
“Like,” you sighed. “Kind of, I don’t know. We had… a thing but never really went out I guess. Either way, I think it’s over.”
“You looked upset,” he repeated, as you turned onto the steps to your apartment and searched for your keys. “Did he say something, or…?”
You shot your brother a glance, nearly smiling as you shook your head. “No, it just…” you trailed off. You kind of wished you could tell him more, but also didn’t know what to say.
You opened the door to the building, letting the two of you in before walking up the flight of stairs together to your floor.
“You can talk to me, you know.” His words caught you slightly by surprise. You wanted to be able to talk about it with him, you wanted to be someone who could talk about anything they wanted with the people that were close in their lives.
Remaining silent the rest of the way up the stairs, neither of you spoke until your apartment door shut behind you.
“I kind of fucked everything up,” you sighed, words falling free from your mouth. Your brother put down his bag on the shelf by the door, watching you as he kicked off his shoes.
“I felt – I don’t know,” you repeated the three words for the thousandth time. “Today I think I completely pushed him away.”
Your brother was quiet, leaning against the kitchen counter. “Is that what you wanted?”
“I mean,” you sighed. “No. I don’t know, maybe. The thing is, he didn’t do anything wrong, not really. And I know that, and I feel dumb for it but I just –”
You cut yourself off, hearing the small shake in your voice. You knew if you kept speaking that tears would start to fall from your eyes, always being an angry and frustrated crier.
“But now I probably fucked that up for good. It was nothing serious to begin with so I’m sure I only scared him off.”
Your brother cleared his throat, unmoving as he spoke softly. “You don’t know that.”
“I guess,” you sighed, grabbing a glass from the cupboard for some water.
“I always do this,” this time, a few tears fell past your eyes as you couldn’t do anything to hold them in anymore. “I always said I needed to be more selfish in life and let things come my way but I – I guess I was selfish because I did what I did for no reason other than protecting myself.”
“Protecting yourself?”
You wiped your cheeks with the back of your hand, slightly tilting your head back as if to blink back in the tears that were freely falling.
“I do the hurting before I can get hurt, you know?”
You squeezed your eyes shut, hoping that the rest of the tears inside your eyes would fall and you’d be done, but it didn’t seem to work quite like that. You opened them when you felt his hand on your shoulder, wrapping you in for a small side hug.
“You,” he sighed. The two of you had never been that affectionate with each other, it was something you were not used to. “You deserve more than that.”
You think that it is one of the nicest things he has ever said to you.
“I always fucking do this, you know? I don’t know why; I don’t even notice I do it until after.”
You were on a roll, now freely crying and letting everything you wanted to say fall from your mouth. “I can’t – I feel so stuck. I don’t know why I’m so afraid of everything.”
“I just can’t let myself be happy for some reason.”
His hand squeezed your shoulder. “You deserve to be happy, too.”
The two of you were quiet as you cried. Letting the tears fall down your face, chest shaking with small heaves as you let everything out.
After a moment, he asked you. “You really like him, huh?”
“What?” Your voice cracked lightly, breathing evening out as you wiped away the wet streaks on your skin.
“The guy, at your work. I don’t think you’ve ever told me about anyone you’ve dated.”
“I have too,” you muttered lightly, although you knew he was right. You had mentioned names in passing, only of the few more serious relationships you were in. Even then, the details were very sparse.
“But seriously,” he continued. “It’s okay to let yourself be vulnerable. Sometimes that’s all you can really do.”
You let him wrap you in a true hug, something you don’t think you’d done with your brother since you were young.
“Do you want to order in? It looks like the rain finally started,” he spoke after pulling away. “We can eat, watch a movie.”
You nodded, the idea of food sounding like the best thing in the world right now. “That sounds good, yeah.”
“You choose what we watch,” he nodded to you, grabbing his phone from the counter, presumably to order whatever kind of food he had in mind.
Wordlessly walking over to your couch, opening up your Netflix as you mindlessly scrolled. You weren’t really paying close attention to the titles, mind still stuck on the little breakdown you had just had.
“What was the French movie you always used to watch when you were sad? I don’t mind watching that if you want.” You head your brother call from the kitchen.
“Oh,” you hummed, nodding at the perfect suggestion. Already knowing that Netflix had Amelie, you quickly found it and had it ready to play.
“It’s a happy one, right?” Your brother spoke, as he sat next to you on the couch while you watched the rain hit the window and pulled a thick blanket over your legs.
“Kind of,” you nodded. “It is a nice ending, but it’s a kind of happy-sad movie, you know?”
“Did you not want to watch it, then?”
“No, no I do,” you offered him a small smile. “I like to watch it when I feel lonely, or upset. Plus, I almost like that happy-sad feeling, it feels just more realistic.”
There was something about it, about your self-induced melancholy. There was still something that felt right, about sitting under a heavy blanket after your wallowing, the only noise around you coming from the rain against the window and the opening notes of Yann Tiersen’s soundtrack playing.
There was something so calming and comforting about the music coming from the TV, a soundtrack you knew maybe too well considering the amount of times you had seen the movie, on top of how often you simply listened to the soundtrack itself on its own.
But a little comfort was just something you needed right now.
You had your little days of comfort, wallowing, lounging, and relaxing. Your time with your brother ended up being surprisingly pleasant, and you two left off on a good note.
You still had three more days off until you had to go back to work, Grace was coming in and covering one of your shifts since you had picked up those extra ones when no one else could.
You spent those days relaxing, getting dinner with Mae and some other friends, running errands, and cleaning out your entire apartment. The weather never changed, the rain pouring the entire time, something that you for now were enjoying because it made you feel okay for lounging at home.
But now you powered down the street as you were about to be late, with your umbrella swaying in the wind and your off-white sneakers splashing in the puddles. You felt the relaxation of your week off slipping away and a small pit of anxiety settle in.
It wasn’t about going to work that stressed you out so much, it was about the possibility of seeing someone who you usually seemed to see at the café.
Once you pushed past the heavy front door, you immediately were looking around at every table to see if you could spot the familiar figure of curly hair as he hunched over the table, twirling pencils between his fingers.
But he wasn’t there, and that table where he usually sat in the back was occupied by a middle-aged woman sipping a latte and speaking loudly on the phone.
He wasn’t there when you were steaming milk and someone was asking you about who had painted the paintings that were hanging on the walls, and he wasn’t there when you had to close alone.
The following day was the same, as well as the weekend, and the next week.
That particular Monday morning you thought you might see him, a shift where he never failed to come in even if he couldn’t sit and stay.
But the only familiar faces were those of older regulars who talked to you about the changing weather and the week of rain that was happening.
That week slipped by, just as the other had. It had been two weeks since you’d had your little breakdown, and since you’d indulged in your self-sabotaging streak. You really knew that it was the wrong thing to do, but just like everything else, you knew that this would pass.
When you really thought about it, he was just listening to you. You had basically told him to leave you alone and that was what he was doing.
But when it had been over two weeks since you’d seen him, you realized you might have had the slightest tinge of heartache.
Just as you would always do, you pushed that feeling away. Telling yourself to forget about it and move on, and that would be that. A thing of the past, a future memory.
Though things had a funny way of working out, apparently it was in store for you to see Harry again.
Nearly halfway through September, the air fresher and more crisp, another thing about the changing weather had you pleased that you could layer on a big sweater but didn’t need a thick coat.
That Monday, you were coming in for the afternoon shift, distracted by attempting to close your soaking wet umbrella when the door of the coffee shop swung open and nearly smacked you in the face.
Taking a stumbling step back in shock, the umbrella in your hand still opened with the rain hitting the top of your head because, of course, the light-knit jacket you were wearing didn’t have a hood.
“Sorry,” deep voice muttering over the sound of cars driving on the wet road, a taller figure appearing from where the door had opened. “You alright – oh –”
Head turning at the far too familiar voice, looking up to be stared down by those clear green eyes.
Fuck.
He had a big coat on just as you did, a hair seeming a bit wet as well and sticking to the skin on the side of his face. There was a little 4 oz cup in his hand, looking so much smaller than it usually did, eclipsed by the size of his hand.
Fuck.
The two of you must’ve looked a bit ridiculous, both with wide eyes and mouths agape, stuck in the doorway of a café with rain hitting the tops of your heads. But you couldn’t move, and you couldn’t walk away, and you wished that the rain would form a current and swiftly wash you away.
“Sorry,” you eventually blurted, gaining a confused look from Harry.
He had the corner of his bottom lip between his teeth, fingertips tapping against the little cup in his hands. Part of you hoped he felt as nervous as you did, but part of you also knew he was probably upset with you and wanted nothing to do with you.
“Have nothing to be sorry for…” he eventually said, words trailing off as if he wanted to say more.
Your eyes shot through the glass window of the coffee shop, knowing you were now officially late for your shift and that maybe someone would run out and tell you that you absolutely had to get to work, but again, no such luck. You could see Aleena yawning through the coffee shop opening.
Again, there was that pit of anxiety, the one that twisted your stomach and made your legs feel numb, as if you couldn’t stand straight but couldn’t move either.
“I didn’t think you were working today,” his words pulled you from your thoughts. “I uh, didn’t see you this morning and thought –”
He cut himself off, stumbling over his words, his gaze flicking away from yours. You didn’t even know what to respond, hoping that anything could get you out of this awkward encounter.
“Sorry,” he said quietly, just as you had.
You shook your head, biting your lips together. He had absolutely nothing to be sorry for.
“You –” again stopping yourself, not knowing how to say what you wanted to say. “I need to get to work…” you said instead, a small point to the door of the café that was still slightly propped open.
“Right – of course,” he took a wide step out of the way, allowing you space to walk out from the rain and to hold the door open for yourself. “Have a good shift.”
You only sent him a tight smile and a little nod, unsure of what else to say.
Not looking back, you quickly walked across the floor of the café with small squeaks coming from your wet shoes. “Oh my god,” muttered under your breath, feeling yourself heat up and grow uncomfortable under the layers you were wearing.
That entire interaction was so completely embarrassing and awkward, and nothing you wanted to ever happen.
You gave yourself a moment in the back room, hanging up your bag and coat, setting your dripping umbrella on the ground. The door pushed open slightly, Aleena’s voice speaking through the wood. “You okay?”
“Hey,” you opened the door all the way for her, hands running over your dampened hair, you sure looked a bit messy. Aleena watched you quietly for a second, as you smoothed your hands over your pants. “I’m assuming you saw that,” you said to your colleague after a moment.
“I did…” she trailed off. She knew more or less everything that had happened between the both of you, and you had no idea that he still came in and seemingly on purpose when you were not working.
You didn’t want to ask, and you didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of asking -- even though that was ridiculous and he wouldn’t possibly know that you were asking about him, but you couldn’t help it. “Does he come in a lot?”
“No,” she shook her head. “First and only time I saw him was today.”
Only nodding, you grabbed your phone from the table and slid it into the back pocket of your pants. The two of you headed out of the back room, you went to clock in and Aleena stood by your side to take the order of a customer.
You followed her to the espresso machine after the order was taken, pulling a shot to make yourself a drink as well.
“He asked about you, you know,” your coworker spoke as you were watching the steady pour of espresso as she was steaming some milk. “He said he thought he’d see you when he came in – which I guess he did.”
Your ears buzzed with her words, but you let the heat in your spine settle as you remembered the reality of the situation. “Didn’t really seem like he wanted to see me.”
Aleena only shook her head, tapping the milk pot on the counter before taking a second to slowly pour it into the mug that already had espresso in it. Once she made a nice big heart with the white foam of the milk, she placed the mug down on the counter and called out the drink before facing you once more.
She looped a finger through the belt loop on your jeans, tugging you towards her tightly. “Babe you’re too hard on yourself,” she spoke as she shook you by the jeans. “He asked about you, asked why you weren’t working this morning.”
You ignored the nervous twist in your stomach at her words, and the heat that rushed to your neck. Although really, you needed to remind yourself that you should remain grounded to reality.
And that seemed to be it, for the moment at least. You had told yourself that you’d made your peace with it, although you knew that really wasn’t true, and so things continued as they always did.
But things had a way of finding the person they were intended for, and on a chilly Saturday afternoon a few days later, it was like a sign had landed right in your lap.
The day was slow, the colder weather usually slowing down clientele for a little while at least a little while. With a lull, you did as you always would and started some cleaning around the café. Wiping down tables, looking for dishes, sweeping up big messes that usually wouldn’t have to be dealt with later on in the day.
Your eyes sweeping over the side of the café, glancing at every table for any forgotten dishes or spilt drinks. Only seeing a few empty mugs left on a table in back, you walked the short distance needed to grab them and wipe over the wooden table with a dampened rag, just as something on the community bulletin board caught your eye when you casually glanced over it.
Two sheets of paper side by side, both the same, were screaming your name.
Metaphorically, of course.
They were posters made to promote an event; the name of the gallery written on top being one you were funnily enough familiar with. But that wasn’t what drew your attention in.
The design of the poster itself was minimal, the only image was front and centre. Image of a painting, one that was bright and cheery and screamed various shades of orange and yellow with a few streaks and splash of blue and green
It was the café.
“Oh my god …” muttering under your breath, you snatched one of the posters off the board as your eyes scanned over the page.
The name of the show was written over top in big bold letters, One Last Time Before You Go, with only one name written beneath it, one name you didn’t even need to read in order to know it was him. With Harry Styles, opening Tuesday September 22nd.
Forgetting the dishes you had been about to pick up, you brought your rag and the paper back to your colleagues.
“Do you know when this was brought in?”
It had to have been yesterday, it was the only day you were off. Noah had no answer for you, saying he hadn’t seen it until now. Aleena, however, had a much different answer for you.
“Oh, shoot sorry babe. I almost forgot,” she grabbed the paper from your hands as Noah went to take an order.
“Forgot what?”
You felt faint, your head was spinning. Why did he put these up here? When did he put these up? Does he come in more often when you're not working, has he asked about you more than that one time Aleena had mentioned?
“I think you know who put these up,” she clicked her tongue, flipping the page over to glance at the backside. “Wrong one…” she muttered.
“What? What do you mean wrong one?” You were babbling, questions flying out of your mouth.
She only smiled, weaving her way around you and until she was leaving from behind the counter and walking back to the bulletin board in the back where you had found it in the first place. You followed, watching her grab the identical one from the board and pin back up the one you had grabbed.
Handing it to you, she nodded her head at it. “He came in yesterday, told me to make sure you saw it. He also left a little something for you on the back.”
You glanced down at the paper in your hands, flipping it around and seeing she was right. On the back was written a note addressed to you in blocky red writing.
“I think you’d enjoy this show, and I’d love for you to be there. Hope to see you, Harry.”
Signed with a little scribbled in red heart and everything.
“Oh my god” you mumbled again, reading and rereading the note again and again.
You forgot you were still standing with Aleena. “You’re going to go, right?”
“What?” Raising your head at the sound of her voice, you saw her watching you with a smile playing on her lips. “I don’t know…”
“I’ll go with you, come on.” She raised an eyebrow at you.
“I think I close,” you stated, very weakly. The opening started at eight, and went until eleven, just like the other one. Even if you were closing, which you realized you weren’t, you would have plenty of time to go.
“No, you don’t,” she stated. “You open and I’m mid-shift. I’ll go with you, c’mon!”
You smiled at her. “You’re the best, you know that?”
“I’ll come to your place that night, and then we’ll go together, okay?”
“Okay,” you nodded slowly.
“Good.”
Three days. For three whole days it was all you could think about.
You knew you had made a bit of a mistake; you really knew that right away – as soon as you had pushed him away.
You wondered how he’d talk to you, if he’d even want to. You wondered if it would be like when you’d run into him briefly outside of the café, if it was going to be awkward and tense with nothing good to come out of it. You knew that technically he had invited you, technically. But still, you really didn’t know if any good could come of it.
Maybe Rory would be there too – tall and gorgeous and literally looking down on you – but also maybe you were just slightly spiralling.
When Tuesday finally arrived, you were practically buzzing, and it wasn’t from the amount of caffeine you had had in the morning.
You took a nap after your opening shift, showering just before Aleena came over. She brought a bottle of wine, immediately opening it and telling you to pour yourself a glass while you got ready.
The weather was still warm enough outside, but there was a brisk fall breeze in the air. Deciding to layer up just a bit since it was also dark out earlier, you pulled a chunky knit cardigan over your patterned orange dress.
After both sharing and finishing off the bottle of wine, you grabbed your beaded purse and headed out the door. You felt as though the wine had helped, but you were still bouncing with nerves. Aleena was chatting your ear off about the car her husband wanted to buy that she thought was too expensive, her story distracting you from your anxious state.
The two of you got to the gallery just before nine o’clock, purposely a bit late.
It was the same energy as the last time you were there, again a man in a red blazer stamping your hand at the entrance right after walking through the double glass doors. Aleena stuck by your side, now done with her story and telling you that you would be okay.
The first painting you saw was directly in the middle. The gallery seemed to be arranged differently than it was before, and although you knew they couldn’t have moved an entire wall, for some reason everything felt more enclosed, more tightly hugged together.
The first painting was the same as the one from the poster, except this time it was in its full size and glory and completely took your breath away. Now as you saw it larger, it was one hundred percent clear to you that it was the café Harry had painted.
“Wow,” Aleena mumbled from next to you, eyes also trained forward. The two of you slowly walked further into the space of the gallery, away from the door and towards that first painting.
It had to be at least seven feet tall, and nearly just as wide. It was all oranges and yellows, with a few streaks of blue. There were also some loosely painted figures of people in front of the shop, all vague and loose but you still wanted to know who he was basing them off of.
After spending another minute or so in front of the painting, you read the small white card that was placed next to it.
Harry Styles
And I could sit here for hours. And I did.
Oil on canvas, 2020
You read over the words again and again.
If you thought that was breathtaking, you were absolutely not prepared for what was to come.
As you let your eyes wander around the rest of the space, you felt like your heart was a brick in your chest, sinking through your body until it shattered on the floor to your feet.
The gallery was filled with warm hues of orange and blue.
Paintings of hands touching, heads resting on shoulders, arms wrapped around each other. Paintings of what you recognized to be the café, paintings of shared fruits, paintings of your favourite colours and your favourite places in the city.
You felt so overwhelmed and you didn’t know where to start.
Finding it in yourself to move your feet, you walked towards the nearest wall away from the entrance. From the corner of your eye you had seen a smaller piece, one that was drawing in your attention. It was slightly tucked away near two bigger paintings, but your eyes remained stuck on this particular one.
The blue was so strongly familiar, like the wave of the ocean encompassing your entire body and pulling you away with it. You realized, as you squinted slightly at the smaller canvas, just why it was calling out to you.
“You keep it,” you shook your head as Harry tried to convince you to take the barely started painting with you home.
“Are you sure?” He watched as you swung your bag over your shoulder, having slipped the light cardigan you had brought in case it got cold.
You nodded. “I couldn’t do much with it, I don’t even have paint at home.”
“Okay,” he slowly nodded, eyes falling to the ground as he placed the small canvas on the table next to him. “Guess I will need something to remember this day by.”
You only laughed, watching the way his eyes glowed with his joke, before dipping your head down and hid your smile as you slipped on your shoes. You wanted to brush off his little comment, but really it made your stomach twist with the possibility that he did really want to remember every moment of his time with you.
The feeling of his hands gripping your thighs barely an hour ago was still burned into your skin, and you were sure to find a few more streaks of paint along yours legs that a part of you was excited to see.
“Let me walk you home,” his words took you slightly off guard, not expecting the offer.
“Oh,” you stood up after tying the laces on your sneakers, “you don’t have to, I’ll be f –”
“I want to,” he cut you off, as you faced him. “And it’s late out and …” he paused, biting his lips together, “and I want to.”
“Okay,” you smile, wanting him to walk with you too. “That would be nice.”
He grabbed a lightweight black jacket that was sitting on the shelf by the door, slipping his arms through it as he held his front door open for you.
The two of you walked side by side, down the emptying street as the moon rose in the sky and the air cooled down. You discussed your day off, and what you had going on with some friends that you hadn’t seen in a while. He told you about how he had promised his friend to help him move, a feat that no one enjoyed.
“What do you think you’re going to do with that painting I started?” You asked, as your feet came to a stop in front of the stairs that led to your building.
“Hmm,” he raised his head slightly, as if thinking deeply about his answer. One of his hands rested at his side, while the other slipped around your back until he was hugging you from the side. “Think I’ll hang it above my bed.”
You let out a small laugh, feeling his hand pinch your hip. Shoving him with your elbow lightly, as if to try and push him away, but he quickly tightened his grip around you and pulled you into his chest instead.
Only laughing again, chest shaking against his and you felt his other hand wrap around you and keep you locked in close. You instinctively raised a hand to his neck, fingertips toying with the strands of hair that poked out above the collar of his jacket, while your other hand rested on his shoulder.
He kept his gaze locked with yours, smile in his features and on his lips as he mirrored your laugh. You only stared up at him, feeling like the two of you were the only ones standing on the street, like the only ones in the city.
You saw his smile die down a bit, before his lips parted slightly. You knew you were staring at his mouth, and when you finally looked back into his eyes you saw him staring at yours as well.
“Do you think things happen for a reason?”
He spoke lowly, his eyes meeting yours again. You felt as though his words carried the weight of the world, but his tone was light as he peered down at you.
“I don’t know…” you shook your head, unable to think. “Why?”
Harry only hummed, remaining quiet as he kept you pressed tight against his chest. “Do you?” You asked after a second, throat feeling dry.
His head dipped down the slightest bit, his nose nearly brushing yours. You let your eyelids close lightly, feeling his lips nudge yours as he spoke again. “Could be,” he hummed, the words pressed as kisses on your mouth.
You couldn’t remember what he was even responding to.
His lips pressed lightly with yours, a sweet kiss of opening mouths and whispers of names. His hands around your back held you tight, as he let out a shaky little sigh against your mouth.
Pulling away for a second, he murmured softly from across you.
“I think I’m starting to have a pretty good idea of what to do with that painting.”
It was the painting. He had added some details over what you had started, more than some. There was nearly an entire figure added, but it was the painting.
The one you had started with him the first time the two of you truly purposely hung out outside of the café, the second time he had kissed you. The painting you didn’t get the chance to finish because he had laid you down on the floor with his head between your thighs and his name on your lips.
Slowly walking towards it, you let your eyes scan over every stroke of the brush.
The figure on the canvas – you knew it was you. Lying there on the floor, only painted from the chest up. Your dress was blending in with the background, one arm bent with your hand resting just above your head. Face turned to the side, you had your eyes shut and your bottom lip between your teeth, though still a hint of a smile on your face.
Orange and pink highlights over your cheeks and under your jaw, lighting up your entire face as the rest of the painting was more gestural and less defined.
To anyone who looked at it, you were sure it must look like someone lying in the sun, perfectly content. You had absolutely no idea how he had captured your likeness. It was done in an extremely realistic manner, but it was you.
You glanced at the white card next to it, breath stopping in your throat when you read over it.
What did my fingers do, before they held you?
Acrylic on canvas, 2020
Over the title, just as every other card in the gallery was his name. But with this particular painting, there was a little “, and” following his name, where yours was written.
You were in awe. Technically, the two of you had both put paint onto this canvas but for him to credit you?
Stuck in front of the painting for who knows how long, you had multiple people come and pass you as you stood there. It was when a familiar voice broke you out of your daze, that you finally turned around.
“It’s my favourite piece too.”
Your stomach twisted into a big huge knot. When your eyes fell to him, you felt like you had forgotten your own name.
He looked so handsome, and maybe even nervous with the way his hands were fidgeting with each other. He had a bright yellow sweater on, collar of a shirt underneath peaking through, with some light grey trousers and a longer black jacket over everything.
His hair was falling perfectly in soft curls around his face, that sweet little smile on his lips as he met your gaze.
“I was worried you wouldn’t come…” he spoke softly, fingertips rubbing over the skin of his bottom lip.
You were sure you looked like a deer in the headlights, eyes widened as you looked at him and failing to come up with anything to say.
“I was worried you wouldn’t even see that poster I put up,” he continued, after you didn’t say anything. “And that you wouldn’t have seen the note I left.”
“Aleena,” you finally spoke, voice quiet as you turned around for a second and waved your arm around to the general space behind you to motion to wherever Aleena stood. “She showed me.”
“Good, good,” he nodded, hands clasped together as your eyes met again. “That’s good.”
A small silence hung in the air, and you wanted to sink into the ground. “I actually saw the poster first,” you blurted in a quick breath, a small sigh leaving your parted lips as you paused. “I recognized your art.”
You saw a smile dance over his features, calming you down the slightest bit. “Really?”
Nodding, you couldn’t help the way your eyes darted over his features again. “Really.”
A pause in conversation again, the two of you stood facing each other, both unsure of what to say or do. “Harry I –”
You cut yourself off, just as he started to speak. “What do you –”
Another little silence hung in the air, before you cleared your throat and spoke again. “The show – it’s really…”
Again, you found yourself unable to properly finish a sentence.
Harry rocked forward on his feet slightly, a little furrow in his brow as he watched you attentively. “Do you like it?”
“It’s so,” you glanced around, completely at a loss for words. “Harry it’s so – it’s beautiful.”
His features relaxed. “Yeah?”
You nodded, feeling your nerves calm down. “Yeah. I don’t even know how you did all this,” your words trailing off as you glanced around once more. “I mean, its all…”
“You. It’s all you.”
You didn’t think you had ever heard him speak so surely about anything. Your heart twisted and jumped in your chest, pounding so heavily that you could barely focus on your breathing.
“Harry –” your voice shook, unable to finish your sentence once more as you didn’t even know what to say and you didn’t think you could properly control your voice at the moment.
He shook his head, lips pulling a bit higher in a smile, although you could still see the way his teeth anxiously pulled at his bottom lip. “Have a look around,” he spoke softly. “We can talk after?”
You nodded lightly. You didn’t deserve him.
“After.”
#i am nervous and excited !! please do come tell me what you thought !!!🥰#🥺 i hope everyone enjoyed#cb#harry styles#harry styles writing#harry syles x reader#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles fanfic#harry styles smut#harry styles imagine
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Becoming a Family With Him, Part 3 // Shuichi, Hikaru, Rhion, Luke, Eisuke
so this came out, as further celebration for the anni. VERY GOOD, much more appreciated than the prior story set lol that one was kind of boring but i get it
they made the kids for all the... kid-less ones, and the eisuke one that used to be VIP-exclusive is now here for everyone to buy (rip those ppl who gacha for it)
my rambling behind the cut (spoilers!!)
shuichi // as ud expect, shuichi has a literal hime ass looking girl (kikyo) for a daughter. she’s only 6, but is pretty calm and ladylike. She even calls her parents with –sama so... ok
luckily shuichi does not strip down all the way in the presence of her daughter and only takes off his suit coat. thanks dad
anyway since shuichi has a break coming up, he wants to have a family trip how nice. but then the dang girl wants to go over to see eisuke WHAT
when soryu exists and lives a block away? unrelatable, im closing the app
anyway eisuke is her first love, which wtf he’s like 20 yrs older than u. even worse, mc says she’s been in love since she was like 3.
shuichi is reconsidering the benefits of democracy in his mind but eventually relents. but then they’re still following the fucc-days rule they set years ago. well, as he says in the story, RULES ARE RULES
blah blah i don’t want to go over everything bc then it’ll be boring reading the story when it comes out in engl right? also im tired bc it’s 1 am and i just want to play toontown in bed but nothing really bad happens. they are a v cute family bc shuichi is a pleasant and mature dad. kikyo and mc even do a little surprise for him at the end and it is very sweet. i feel like out of all the families, this is the most ideal
mad hatter // so they have twin sons named Rui and Kai. Rui is the childlike one that resembles Rhion in personality, Kai is the more mature one that resembles Al. man i forget that boy’s name but u get me
i know they only can use stock bgs but it’s killing me that these dang kids get to sleep in what looks like separate king sized beds.
even though rhion is now a father of two, he still acts like... 10. i mean he still horni but it makes me feel weird
later it’s revealed that Ota teaches them both as an art tutor bc they both showed an interest in art. this is cute bc ota is bad with kids in this universe LOL
the ending on this one was weird cuz the kids didn’t show up in the entirety of the last ep bc it was about WORK. so uh... interesting
hikaru // so their son is named akari. haha get it because it means light. like how hikaru also means light. can mc name her kids unrelated to their father or is that against the Geneva convention
this kid actually acts like an actual little boy. like what hikaru would’ve probably turned into if not for the whole sad backstory. the story starts with akari just bringing a dog randomly home one day. he actually saved the dog (it is very cute bc he did not want the dog to cry), and then after a talk they decide to keep the dog as long as akari knows the responsibility of taking care of an animal.
so next day, the bidders come over to their house and everyone’s like woaw a dog. lol they come into their house as guests and eisuke and mamo still demand for beverages, they all suck
akari names the dog... “Light” (Raito) and i want out of this nightmare. Naturally bc Light is an abandoned dog it’s still kind of bad with interacting with things. But then Light suddenly be giving the ( ╹ਊ╹) to soryu bc remember, animals love him. everyone clowns on soryu for being an unintentional dog whisperer and then akari is like “soryu san pls make me ur apprentice” and he gives some advice like approaching it slowly, and talking to it from the front instead of back.
blah blah there’s a situation where Light goes YEET after a Doberman gets all angry and then hides bc then another dog is scaring it. hikaru swoops in to the save the day as the Real Dog Whisperer. ok it’s cute when hikaru actually gets to look cool for once LOL
luke // luke is cute on the bc “pre-story” scene he’s actually pretty open to the idea of having kids; he actually goes “well imo we should think abt it pretty soon, but i wanted to hear ur opinion on it”
but then he gets horni. and then he’s like “our kids are going to have your collarbones. awesomeee im looking forward to that” ....ok
ok cut to the actual story and they’re in Japan. Luke’s kid looks... strange versus the others. why are his eyes so big? omg voltage his eyes arent going to be saucers just cuz he half white
also the kid’s name is Yuri (Or Urey). They couldn’t think of any other Brit-styled names? Like Harry? Henry? William? Wilfred? hey stan be my princess btw
he’s pretty cute, though he gives serious “timid kid that gets bullied in the children’s movie” vibes. He calls Luke “daddy” and mc “mammy/mommy”.
so luke talks about his relationship w/ soryu and eisuke and then yuri is like “i want friends like that” wow cute but also find less ethically-complicated friends
so luke lets yuri meet a young patient of his (haru) so they can be friends. they get along so it’s good. haru gets in critical condition later so luke zooms outta there to do the operation.
LOL but at the end yuri is like, “i want to make more friends. (...)
can i go to the bidder’s room from now on?” this boy works fast
And then he’s like “Eisuke-san... please be my friend.” HIS POWER. even eisuke was like :O
so then eisuke orders a whole bunch of food and books up to the penthouse. But then yuri’s like “...i like eisuke’s eyes” and everyone’s like oh man that’s gonna be his fetish
Baba: why have u started to have an interest in eyes
Yuri: I read it from one of daddy’s medical books
Hikaru: wtf u can read that at 4???
(...)
Soryu: wat
Yuri: um... i want soryu to be my friend too
Yuri: bc soryu’s eyes are also powerfully cool...
eisuke // ok this gets an extended ramble bc the more annoying the story the longer i must complain
so you might be thinking, “oh so this is gonna be a flashback in some in media res styled story with your 2 kids, u know in the style of the others” and well, no
you just go straight to white screen into the flashback, back when eito was smaller and thus a little more cute. well it’s not really false advertising bc they did say “reminisce” in the description. but i wanted to see eito be a good big brother for a moment! or... less good? man i wanted to see kaito go waaaah like a baby idk i wanted to see him exist
so back to the story they cut to small eito. even as a smaller punk he does fight with his dad a little, just w/ a more narrow vocabulary to work with. tho at this point he’s still pretty sweet so clearly eisuke clowning him day and night was a negative effect on his development. (doesn’t treat his child like a child) (child grows up to a punk that doesn’t respect him) (surprised pikachu)
being the son of a billionaire means that this child has to go study at a very young age and listen to MOZART. no child of eisuke ichinomiya will be listening to degenerate bops like lee taemin’s criminal
next day they all go to the very fancy school that eito will be attending. eisuke does a speech, but then eito is all like “why is papa over there all the time” in reference to how all the other parents in attendance are having fun with their children, but eisuke is busy talking to other people for business and connections etc. etc. mc kind of has a hard time trying to explain it to eito bc... it’s honestly poor parenting...
eiji shows up after arriving late, and he’s like “gramps is gonna be with ya today! instead of papa” which is cute but then she’s like psst thanks for coming and im like oh... so grandpa just didn’t randomly come to the open house for fun he’s just gonna be surrogate dad while real dad is busy... aw...
and then at the end eito’s like FUC THIS KINDERGARTEN. eisuke is like “(smh) don’t yell in public. (despite everything) you are still the eldest son of the Ichinomiya family”
and so afterwards it’s clear that eito does not want anything to do with this school. he just sits in the classroom until mc is there to pick him up instead of playing in the courtyard or w/e, wanting nothing to do with the other kids.
so later there’s a hiking trip for the students and both of their parents, and mc asks eisuke if he’ll be available for it. eisuke is like, “i have a business trip that day, so I’ll have to adjust my schedule” and he’s been very busy in the opening of a new business or w/e. mc tells him to not do so much for something like that and that it’s ok if she goes alone with eito on the trip.
it’s the day of the trip, and mc goes alone with eito. she notes that a lot of dads did indeed come along for the trip. she apologizes to eito and says that she did talk to eisuke about the trip before, but he’s simply busy for this day. and im like... but girl, you were the one who told him not to change his schedule for the trip. yes a trip may seem less important than business ventures, but don’t make it sound like you weren’t the one who stopped him. lol. idk why im pressed abt this single line of dialogue bc later she does realize she fucced up there
well eito is just like w/e about it and has pretty much accepted that sort of thing
anyway eito goes missing later and one of the kids said that he told eito that his dad (eisuke) didn’t come bc his dad thinks that his work is more important than his son. so eito got mad and ran off somewhere
and then mc finally gets the lightbulb moment that eito... wants to see his dad!! he ran off to go try to see him somehow??? !! wow so sweet
it’s raining like a mf but then in her search for eito eisuke randomly pops out of nowhere. He’s like “ho i did not remember saying that i wasn’t coming” and she’s like “im sorrryyy” and both me and him are like “just find the dang kid”
ok yea they find eito, he starts being a good student, and u start to see where he starts being antagonistic towards his dad LOL etc. etc. lol this story annoyed me so i don’t feel like doing the rest of the play by play orz
anyway thanks for reading my garbage LOL
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A Masterlist of all @suoirallesalta edits!
Every edit is tagged under #suoiredits. edits are sorted acc to their books! enjoy
click here for my art masterlist!
Making Sabina in the Character without using Character’s assets style (edit challenge
Kepler, in only the harness.
f!Adam
Jen in her dress including the lingerie
Simon Montjoy in Ava’s dress
younger Mitzi Montjoy
AVSP MC as on the cover
💫 Nia Ellarious
the perfect pair? (Nia x MC in an AME crossover)
Goddess of the Sea (Nia x Sunkissed edit)
Nia and Imtura with... moustaches
Nia with TE Alma’s hair and MTFL Ava’s outfit (#suoirandom edit)
Nia as Neisha (new avatar)
Starry Nia (#BladesAW)
Empress of The Shadow (#BladesAW)
Nia as BloodBound women: Kamilah (#BladesAW)
Nia as BloodBound women: Rheya (#BladesAW)
the pretty young girl next door (#BladesAW)
Quartermaster Nia Ellarious (#BladesAW)
Nia Ellarious as TE MC (#BladesAW)
Nia Ellarious as Shreya (#BladesAW)
Nia Ellarious in her dress including her lingerie
nia ellarious hot goth girlfriend
The Priestess (GIF edit) (Nia in RC outfit)
Tyril Starfury
cold and broody™ vampire elf (#BladesAW)
cold and broody™ bodyguard (#BladesAW)
cold and broody™ elementalist (#BladesAW)
cold and broody™ orc (#BladesAW)
cold and broody™ designer; feat. f!Tyril (#BladesAW)
f!Tyril (#BladesAW)
Tyril with f!Blaine’s hair (#BladesAW)
rogue-ish Tyril Starfury (with a beard)
The Mage (GIF edit) (in RC outfit)
Scream(o)s from the inside (Kade album cover edit)
Bald-ur (#BladesAW)
Damn those elves and their magicks (Mal - Aerin hairswap)
Modern Rogue-ish Mal Volari (with a beard)
StarCorp
Blades of Lust and Sensuality
Jax Tora and Robin Matsuo (face swap)
Duke Richards in the banana mascot outfit from Platinum.
Charlie Smith
A relaxing day at the waterfall! (edit inspired by Charlie Premium Scene!)
Quartermaster of the Dreadlord (DSAW)
Quartermaster of the Flotillan Pirates (DSAW)
Siren of The Light (DSAW)
Charlie as Atlas, Eli and Shreya from TE (DSAW)
Maggie
Maggie! M-Maggie? (MM and DS Maggie Crossover)
Maggie with HC Hazel’s hair and QB Poppy’s outfit. (#suoirandom request)
Oliver Cochrane
Oliver Cochrane as Luke Hemmings
oliver cock rain (DSAW)
f!Oliver (DSAW)
Distant Sores (Charlie x Edward face swap)
DS MC using BaBu2 sprite (DSAW)
Distant Couture // Hot Shores (DS x HC crossover, DSAW)
Ayna Seth
student!Ayna and professor!Ayna
Ayna as Imogen from ILB
buff ayna
Ayna as Jackie in the Open Heart 3 CG
vampire!Ayna
Ayna Seth
Ayna Seth as a Lovelink Match
Ayna Seth as Robin Tora
aynia ellarious
TA meets TA (Ayna - Aiyana Midthunder crossover)
Blaine Hayes
m!Blaine in f!Blaine’s dress
f!Blaine as m!Blaine
Blaine with PT Raleigh’s Hair and MOTY MC’s outfit (#suoirandom edit)
Blaine Hayes edit inspired by @aestheteasteria’s icon
Tatum Mendoza
John Somerset x Tatum Mendoza crossover
Tatum in Ayna’s dress / Tatum as Ayna
MC
politics reporter and student (FA mc x WT mc)
MC with ATV Pax’s hair and TNA Robin’s outfit (#suoirandom edit)
Ayna x MC
girlfriends
partners
Bodyguard Murphy (lmao)
Murphy Icons <3
I think I got the address to the wrong Murphy
Skye Crandall x Gerard Way
Dark Mage Ajay (choicedits challenge)
Power Duo (Luz x MC)
Bridgette Gardner with TRH Cedric Vescovi’s hair and PM Hayden’s Outfit (#suoirandom edit)
Luz Estrada in her dress including the lingerie
Noah Marshall in the banana outfit (edit request)
Sadie McGraw
Sadie McGraw (in the TNA MC’s Golden Dress)
A bit younger Sadie McGraw
Sadie McGraw (in casual(?) outfit)
Aislinn Tanaka
Aislinn Tanaka in QB Poppy’s outfit and diff black hair
aislinn tanaka hot goth girlfriend
aislinn tanaka hot goth girlfriend 2
aislinn tanaka girlfriend
aislinn tanaka’s v short hair
Gabe and MC as Mal and Nia
Babe Ricci with long hair
The Boys
Ava as Britney from ILITW
IGHT (NB face swap)
MC with TE MC’s hair and BB MC’s outfit (#suoirandom edit)
bryce.. lahela .. and,, uh.. bryce sterling..
Rookie Ramsey
Rookie Varma
Raleigh Carrera
Raleigh Carrera with AME Mackenzie’s hair and VOS Naomi’s outfit (#suoirandom edit)
An exclusive sneak-peek at Raleigh Carrera’s fuck-the-stereotype Vinyls look that has got the fandom in meltdown!
Raleigh Carrera with BOLAS MC’s hair and THM Eris’s outfit. (#suoirandom edit)
A Very Wilshere Christmas! (Album Cover)
The Hottest Couple of the Industry (Avery x MC)
Poppy is just angry Avery
Zoey Wade
“Besties!” (mc and Zoey as Mc and Ava from MTFL)
priestess zoey wade
zoey in floral
zoey in floral (beach-wear edition)
TA Zoey Wade
Zoey Wade as Atlas Ernhardt
Zoey Wade in TE MC’s gala outfit
zoey in the dress she gave to mc in the first chapter
Ina/Ian Kingsley
Ina Kingsley with TF Becca's hair and BB Kamilah's outfit. (edit request)
Ina Kingsley with TNA Sam’s hair and WT MC’s outfit. (#suoirandom edit)
Veronica with TNA Sofia’s hair and ACOR Sabina’s outfit. (#suoirandom edit)
MC with BP Courtney’s hair and QB Poppy’s outfit.
how (ridiculous) mc would look if she actually wore that ligerie under that dress
📰 Robin Tora
Asian Robin as Ava Lawrence from MTFL
Asian Robin as Ava Lawrence from MTFL (#2)
Asian Robin as Ava Lawrence from MTFL (#3)
Robin as Mikasa Ackerman from Attack on Titan
Jax Tora and Robin Matsuo (face swap)
Robin in an oversized baggy shirt
wait, wrong Robin- shit (Sofia TNA edit)
Robin Tora as Robin Tora and Robin Tora as Robin Tora
Robin as Cassian in Witness
Robins at the beach
robin hood
asian f!robin tora as blaine hayes
Flame the Crow & Me : One Boob (TC&TF face swap)
Annia Adairious (TCTF AW)
orc!Val (TCTF AW)
Kenna Rys with NB Katherine’s hair and HSS Principal Rivera’s outfit (#suoirandom edit)
🌙 Atlas Ernhardt
Atlas Ellarious
Atlas, the adventurous elf
Queen of Vampires, Atlas, of Clan Ernhardt
Vampire Queen Atlas (edit #2)
Atlas, the Snow Princess
Atlas, the Moon Princess
Atlas in genderfluid flag colors!
m!Atlas in f!Atlas’s Gala dress
f and m!Atlas swapped
☀️ Eli Solaris Russell (my mc)
Eli’s first (accidental) spell cast!
Eli’s momentous first day at Penderghast
⚙️ Beckett Harrington
“Small dapper Beckett… confirmed.”
Beckett as Connor from Detroit: Become Human
Shreya Mistry
Shreya “Wonder Woman” Mistry
❣️ Pend Pals
“All dressed in black.”
Pend Gals on a night out in matching black outfits (#1)
Pend Gals on a night out in matching black outfits (#2)
Magick Docs (OH crossover)
Pend Pals in Belvoire attire
Pend Gals on a night out after the Amorelia Day Gala (faceapp faceswap edit)
The Elementalists - Across the Dimension (2D art crossover)
💞 Shreya x Atlas
“your eyes, they shine so bright”
“Hey Shreya.. Marry Me”
“Wedding Day!”
💞 Beckett x Eli/MC
Beckett and Eli in a western setting
Eli x Beckett face swap
Eli x Beckett in Robin x Sofia art (lmao)
🌟 Double Trouble (Eli/MC + Atlas)
Hydrobreath (Eli + Atlas)
“my younger twin sister” (double trouble x mtfl edit)
Misc
Blood of the Sun (a spinoff movie poster)
Coolness of metal and water-atts (meme)
Alma with FA Dionne’s hair and D&D MC’s outfit (#suoirandom edit)
Sam Dalton
Sam Dalton as Sam Dalton and Sam Dalton as Sam Dalton
Sam Dalton with BB Serafine’s hair and TCTF Val’s outfit. (#suoirandom edit)
Sofia as Lady Dimitrescu from Resident Evil
the cake on sofia’s skirt works as floral print
John Somerset x Tatum Mendoza crossover
Vampire Harlenay
Flynn o’Malley in fem VOS characters’ hair
Flynn o’Malley in fem outfits
Anna Koishi
Anna Koishi, at the club, with short pink hair
Anna Koishi with TE Atlas’s hair and PT Avery’s outfit. (#suoirandom edit)
Anna Koishi as Atlas Ernhardt
politics reporter and student (FA mc x WT mc)
Asian f!Dakota with Hispanic f!Dakota’s hair
Daenerys, the mother of dragons (using TRR mc)
TRR mc as Daenerys (edit #2)
the greatest witch of our time (BB mc as Hermione Granger)
me before you (poster edit with TRR Mc and AME Adam)
Aquaman (ft Cassian and Ava)
Wolf Bride wolf in Poppy’s outfit
Imogen Dragons
rip fallen books
The Crew (DSAW)
Wizards of Waverley Place (THOBM edit)
omg a hit tweet (pb meme)
Choicedits Challenges
ACOR Sabina without using her assets
OpH Jackie without using her assets
Harry Potter and Hermione Granger using Choices assets
Priestesses of the Light
Coldplay’s Higher Power album cover using only Choices assets
Asian Wolf Bride MC as TE MC
Lovelink Edits
Nicholas Adley in Pirate Outfit
Jamie Grant in multiple outfits from HERO
#choices#pixelberry#playchoices#play choices#suoiredits#the elementalists#choices foreign affairs#choices queen b#robin tora#Blades of light and shadow
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Any Graham/MC friendship headcanons?
OR
Carl/MC relationship headcanons if the other one is too difficult?x
Graham/MC friendship
Probably has him under “fishman ham 🎣” in their contacts — or at least I would lol
idk there wasn’t much interaction in the house since they weren’t each other’s type therefore there was little social to no scenes (which I think is kinda dumb because you can still be friends with someone if you don’t choose to go the romantic route yet he’s not that much of a fan fav so maybe that’s why? They also had a lot of characters so maybe that’s it too? Anyways) unless mc was going after marisol or considered a friend of hers? I’m not too sure on the still carrying feelings towards marisol if she’s with graham route so that’s based off pure assumption
If mc did start a friendship while he was with marisol and they still had feelings towards marisol then it wouldn’t happen until some months after the show or when/if marisol broke up with him (I made it canon that ultimately they do split but yeah)
so let’s say mc began a friendship while he’s dating marisol and mc has no romantic feelings towards marisol then?
They’d probably bond over some shit-talking cause I view graham as someone who can and WILL talk his shit
Mc and graham are on different time lengths majority of the time since graham is always up at the crack of ass out on his boat to snatch the catch of the day
He sends selfies on his boat—again at the crack of ass
“lemme know if you find aquaman! B safe uglie”
“i AM YOUR own personal gorgeous aquaman 😏 x”
“Don’t ever disrespect Jason momoa again in ur life !!!”
“U disrespect my wife Wunmi Mosaku”
“No I disrespect YOU. She doesn’t want u.”
“She wnted Jordan Patrick smith on tht show.”
“🥱🤫🖐🏽...I don’t blame her but only if he has the beard.”
“yew n ur got damn beards 😒”
Loves his seafood...I think that’s a given
“Can we eat something else, please!”
“...My Omama (grandmother) made her famous dressed crab.”
I decided against making hcs of graham before along with some others but ultimately thought he be of German background?
Not the greatest at speaking but understands the spoken language and ofc the curse words and insults are his favs + teaches mc some
I feel like he’s rough handed and has no issue bumping hips, elbowing, and putting mc into headlocks—basically treating his bestie like anyone of his bros really but he does that with anyone (including his omama, who laughs sending a punch with her knuckles against his forearm. It’s more of a gentle firm grip but they do this in greeting?)
Has no issue lugging mc around like some fish in a net?
like if there’s a severe rainstorm in his hometown of Devon and mc is the type to hate rain and they have a long way to get back to the car after hanging on the sandy beach all day, he’ll throw them over his shoulder like it’s nothing and stalk his way back up the cliffs to get back muttering “I’m getting real sick of Der mist!”
“Blah blah blah, you love me. Kiss my arse.”
“I could drop you on ya head, I’m sure that’s happened before.”
Then comes the hits, pinches, and jabs
Convinces mc to get random tattoos that he may or may not have doodled when they’re drunk off their asses
The next morning, “graham...what the f—
“Ah, now you look like me!” He ruffles mc’s hair from behind as they’re staring at their reflection in horror, “except I’d never get face tatts.” He whistles in slight disapproval
Mc might have to choke him and ask Gary to help dispose of the body in the ocean
Mc helps trim his beard instead since they almost cut off the entire patch left on top of his head “you look a bit like a beet or a mandrake from Harry Potter. Just cut the shit off or grow it all out, you’re embarrassing me.”
“Whatever happened to my body, my choice?”
“...that doesn’t apply to you. I’m your friend, I love you, and I’m trying to help you.”
“Oh, Piss off!”
Lots of middle fingers are used and hugs
Messy car, messy office, the only thing that’s neat is his hair/beard and his work ethic when it comes to the fish
He’s comes to mc when marisol dumps him and he’s hammered so that either = mad af or sad as hell sometimes it’s a little bit of both depending on how much he’s had
“Who do I have to fight? Or do you want to hug it out?”
“I kinda wanna slow dance to snow patrol.”
And you know it’s bad when graham openly wants to listen to snow patrol in the early afternoon instead of jelly roll or some shit
Hey, whatever the heartbroken fisherman wants he gets. That’s mc’s bud so they do what they can to make graham feel best...even if that means stepped on toes—He’s not the best dancer
I do get single dad vibes from him or at least uncle graham, he’s got a 3 year old son/nephew named Roy and he speaks so highly of the mother of his child/nephew who struggles with addiction but he’s on extremely good terms with her family
You adore Roy, who much like his daddy/uncle loves the water and sailboats
Mc will post captions about how thankful they are to have met graham due to some mess of a reality tv show whereas graham will post embarrassing pics that he secretly took of them and say things like “mc suxx a lot of the time 💘
“Text me when you get home bitch!” Type of friend too, cause if he can send you selfies so early in the day that he’s on the water at work then mc can txt him to let him know that they’re home after a night out, coming from work, etc...if they both are aware that the other was out
#litg#litg2#litg s2#litg headcanons#I barely wrote notes on him so my apologies to the fishman lol#he has potential to be great#litg graham#litg mc#litg marisol#litg Gary
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