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#deep end series
heyyyharry · 1 year
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Deep End - Chapter 17: Die for Me
...in which Ezi feels betrayed, and Harry just wants to help.
AU: famous!harry, siren!mc, adult modern retelling of the little mermaid? lol, fake dating, enemies to lovers.
WARNING: MATURE THEMES
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A/N: Starting my new job tomorrow, kinda nervous but excited!!! Enjoy this chapter. New update next week :)
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A million thoughts ran through Harry’s mind when Maggie took him to her home. It was an old block of flats near Shadwell station. Hers was the door numbered 27 on the ground floor.
“I hope she’s awake now,” Maggie said as she unlocked the door. There was light coming out of the room at the end of the hallway, and Maggie beckoned Harry to follow. The flat was cold and wet, with muddy boot prints on the wooden floor, but it didn’t make any difference since both Harry and Maggie were soaked from the rain anyway.
“Oh, you’re awake,” Maggie said as she entered the room. “Harry is here to see you, dear.”
When Harry stepped in, Ezi’s blue eyes pinned him to the spot. She was sitting on the bed in Maggie’s funky rainbow t-shirt; her forehead and arms were bruised. Maggie had told Harry that Ezi had fallen from the bridge, and honestly, he had imagined worse, so this was quite a big relief. He did wonder how Maggie had managed to dive in and save her, but that was a question for later.
“Hi, Ezi. How are you feeling?” There was no response or reaction, so he continued, “I was very worried when I heard. I’m glad you’re safe now.”
Still nothing. Just two hollowed eyes staring at him like they didn’t speak the same language.
“I’ll leave you two alone,” Maggie said.
It was then that Ezi spoke. "Get out. No, not you, Maggie. You can stay. I don't want him here."
Harry's gaze jumped to Maggie, who was now half a step out of the door. She slowly looked up, eyes locked with his.
He didn't know what he was expecting, for her to say something, maybe? He wished she would defend him and try to convince Ezi to just hear him out. But Maggie only stared back, helpless, as if saying, 'Maybe you should go.'
But you fucking asked me to come here, Harry wanted to say, but he clenched his fists and took a deep breath.
Ezi still refused to meet his eyes. She had her arms crossed in front of her chest and an agonising look on her face. It was at this moment that Harry thought about her falling into the dark water, her struggling to swim, drowning and helpless against the currents for the first time in her life. She must have been so scared. He wished he'd been there. He would have jumped in and tried to save her.
"Ezi--"
"What did I say?" she snapped. "Get the hell out or I'll start screaming and the neighbours will come. Maybe they'll even call the police." She whipped her head to Maggie with a threatening glare. "You wouldn't want the police to knock on your door, right?"
Maggie tugged gently at Harry's soaked sleeve. "M-Maybe you should go outside for a bit."
But Harry was impatient. He shrugged off Maggie and strode over to the bed, and Ezi recoiled and gripped the duvet tightly to her chest, an alarmed look on her face as he sat down on the edge of it and reached for her. She didn't think he meant any harm, did she?
"Hey, listen." Carefully, he placed his hand on her knee and felt her stiffen against his touch. He hated this. What had he done? "Ezi, please hear me out."
"I've heard enough," she hissed. "My sister tried to kill me, my queendom is in danger, and now I can't go home. Are you happy now?"
"Of course not. How could you say that?"
"Harry, maybe you should go.”
Maggie’s attempt to intervene was ignored.
"When Maggie told me what happened to you, I was so scared I'd lose you. Why do you think I came?"
"You came because you feel guilty." The words came out of Ezi’s mouth so fast that Harry believed she'd spent this whole time thinking of the reason why. "You want me to forgive you for the horrible things you said so you could move on. Well, guess what? I'm not a person, remember? I don't feel, and therefore, I have no sympathy for you.” There was a pause, and then, the worst thing she could possibly say to him, "You will never get my forgiveness, Harry." Her voice was shaking, her lashes wet. "I can't believe for a second...I was willing to die for you."
When coming here, Harry had prepared himself to get yelled at or have stuff thrown at him depending on how well Ezi was, but to hear her say she would never forgive him left him completely numb. His hand fell back onto his lap, and he sat there, watching her turn her back to him and yank the duvet up to her neck. As she pretended to fall back to sleep, he got up and quietly left the room.
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“Hope you like herbal tea. I don’t really drink tea.”
“Thank you.”
Maggie placed the steaming cup down on the table, and Harry instantly warmed his hands on it. The kitchen was just as cold as the rest of the flat, and while waiting for the water to boil, Harry had taken some time to observe. Everything here seemed clean and tiny but didn’t really feel like it. He paid attention specifically to the seashells collection on top of the fridge and the dead flowers, which had sat in that dusty vase for so long that they’d turned black. Since this building was so close to the tube station, you could hear the train from the distance.
“It gets quieter after midnight,” Maggie said as she sat down in front of Harry with her own cup of tea. Harry’s cup was plain white, but hers was shaped like a fox.
Harry blew into his cup and took a sip. “So, how did you manage to find Ezi? Did she tell you she was going to the bridge?”
“Not at all. I followed her there because I assumed that would be the place she would meet the Sea Queen.”
Harry froze while Maggie just calmly took a sip of her steaming tea.
“What…did you just say?” he asked.
The steam fogged up her glasses, so she took them off, folded them, and set them down on the table. Without them, her blue eyes were more vivid than usual, almost resembling Ezi’s. The colour of the sea.
Chills rushed down Harry’s spine and he swallowed thickly. “You know what she is?”
“Harry, darling,” Maggie said. “I am what she is.”
“You’re…a siren?”
“Well, I used to be. Decades ago. My sister killed the man I loved. He was a fisherman. I was supposed to become the next Sea Queen, but my sister had always been jealous of me. She knew I was in love with a fisherman, so she murdered him and ate his heart. But then she suddenly possessed power so strong that she could raise the ocean and drown an entire island. She turned me into a human and forced me to live eternity in this world while she told everyone that I had been killed by my lover. And I must tell you this, immortality is overrated. People mourn and forget about you, and you have to watch every single person you know pass away.”
That was too much for Harry to take. He could feel the pounding of his heart inside his own head. After a moment of silence, he managed to ask, “Have you told Ezi?”
“Yes. She was more shocked than you, actually. But deep down, she knows I’m someone she can trust. I think we established this mutual understanding from the moment we first met. After all, we both share royal blood. One Queen would recognise the other.”
“Does that mean she’s gonna be trapped here for eternity as well?”
“Unlikely. I think her sister took the pig’s heart, thinking it was your heart, and attempted to kill her, but failed.”
“We have to do something.”
“We are no match for the Sea Queen. It’s Ezi who has to stand up for herself.”
“I don’t want her to end up like you.” The words flew out before Harry could stop himself, causing Maggie to stare at him, wide-eyed. “I’m sorry. That’s not what I meant,” he stuttered. “But Ezi is a good person. Not that I’m saying you’re not, but Ezi never really wants to be Queen. She just wants to make her mother proud. She just wants to be loved like any of us in this godforsaken world. She belongs here with me. She deserves to have a normal life here with a family that appreciates her, and if those creatures believe she’s dead, then we cannot allow her to face them.”
“Those creatures are her family.”
“By blood, not by choice.” Harry clenched his fist so he wouldn’t slam it on the table. “I’m not letting her go back to the ocean after what they put her through.”
Maggie broke into laughter as she slowly shook her head. “Do you have any idea what you’re talking about, child? When they realise the heart they have is not yours, they will come back for you. The Sea Queen would do anything for your heart. Now you may say you don’t care, that you will gladly die for your damsel in distress or whatever, but what you’re thinking right now isn’t heroic; it’s foolish. This is not your fight, Harry. If the Sea Queen got your heart, she would wipe out humankind.”
“So you’re saying I have no choice but to lose Ezi?”
Maggie reached across the table to hold his trembling hand as she looked into his eyes. For a moment, they shared a sense of understanding. “If you care about Ezi, you must stay back and let her fight her own battle.”
Harry picked up his cup of tea and sipped away in silence. Then, he asked, “Did you turn back into a siren to save Ezi from the river?”
Maggie smiled. “No. I’m just a really good swimmer.”
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Harry woke up to find Ezi staring at him. He was sitting in the armchair facing her bed, unsure how or how long ago he’d fallen asleep, but it seemed like she had been awake for a while; she’d read a big chunk of the book lying open and face down on her lap.
“You know, you talk in your sleep,” she said suddenly, breaking the nerve-wracking silence between them. Harry didn’t expect her to acknowledge his existence after her tantrum earlier, so he really didn’t know what that observation was supposed to mean.
“Did I say something wrong?” he asked, combing his fingers through his messy hair.
“No, it’s just gibberish, really. But you seemed frightened.”
He had a good reason to be. Although he didn’t quite remember the specifics, he’d had a short nightmare about falling into the ocean, and he’d just kept falling and falling. There had been flashes of a half-fish, half-human creature, and the stench of blood was alarmingly vivid. When the claws ripped his chest open, the last thing he saw was Ezi’s face, his blood dripping from her fangs.
“It’s alright,” he said. “I’m alright.”
Ezi only nodded. This eerie nonchalance wasn’t like her at all, and he kind of wished she would start yelling at him again. Instead, she flipped the duvet to the side, revealing her broken ankle, which had been bandaged by Maggie. Speaking of Maggie, where the hell was that woman? She had told Harry to watch Ezi as she went out to get groceries, so she should be home by now.
“Would you mind helping me out of bed? I want a bath,” Ezi said.
Harry was frozen in shock for a second, then he snapped out of it and quickly got up from the chair to help her. She could barely walk, so she had her arm around his neck and held onto him as she limped to the bathroom. He would offer to carry her, but he wasn’t sure if they were cool enough for that yet; she couldn’t have forgiven him after one short nap.
He drew the bath with extra hot water, just the way she liked it, and waited for her to strip off her clothes so he could settle her into the bath. She lay there, her bandaged ankle resting on the edge of the tub, looking relaxed as if she’d just finished her 9-to-5 and not survived from attempted murder by her own sister. After his conversation with Maggie, Harry knew Ezi couldn’t have that simple life, but he couldn’t help but fantasise about one for them.
“If you need me, I’ll be in the kitchen. Just call.” Harry turned to leave, but Ezi stopped him.
“Wait. Can you stay here with me?”
He stared at her. “You want me to stay?”
“Yeah, to make sure I don’t fall asleep. I don’t want my bandage wet.”
“Okay. I’ll stay then.” He came to sit on the floor beside the tub, elbow resting on the edge, head against his knuckles. Steam curled up from the water as she soaked her entire body in, only leaving her head above the surface. They sat in silence, listening to the dripping of the sink. Harry had so much to say, yet he didn’t want to give her a reason to dismiss him. Maybe she’d thought it through and changed her mind about him. Letting him stay here with her could be her way of showing forgiveness.
“When you said I wasn’t a person,” she spoke suddenly yet quietly, “was there any part of you that meant it?”
He nervously wet his lip. “To say no would be a lie. So yes, only at that moment, though,” he sighed. “It was like…oh, I think I’m in love with this girl, but now I find out she’s been plotting to murder me this whole time, so maybe none of it was real.”
Ezi nodded once. “Fair enough.”
Her response made him chuckle. “You know, you sound very British now.”
“Guess I’m easily influenced,” she said, giggling a little. It felt good to hear her laugh again.
“But I’m very sorry about the things I said out of anger. I didn’t mean them.”
“That’s okay. I know you didn’t. I guess I was being a little bit harsh, too. I just...well, it was a lot. Feeling betrayed by you and then my sister also betrayed me, and I..."
She left the sentence unfinished. Silence seeped back in as Harry watched her stare intensely at her broken ankle.
“Why didn't you believe me when I said I loved you?”
His question caught her by surprise, and her brows furrowed thoughtfully. “Why do you believe you love me? I’m not trying to be mean or anything, but as you said, love is a complicated thing. It’s not one emotion. You can’t possibly know what love feels like.”
“Yeah, well…I don’t know. But I miss you when you’re not around. I get happy when you are. I think about you in the middle of the day. And I’ve been having these scenarios of you, me, and Chilli just having a normal life together, away from the fame and your murderous family. I know I’m just a useless human. I don't have magical powers, nor am I the ruler of a kingdom, but I want to protect you and keep you safe. If that's not love, it's something very close.”
“Well...I wouldn’t know.”
“I think you do, Ezi,” Harry said. “When was the moment you realised you couldn’t kill me?”
“This may sound silly, but I think it was bedtime, and you were reading to me and Chilli, and you were so tired that you stumbled over your words.”
“You didn’t want to kill me because I couldn’t read properly?”
She rolled her eyes at the joke. “It was when I realised I didn’t want to be Queen or my mother’s puppet. I just wanted to be in bed with you and the cat after a long day and listen to bedtime stories.”
When she placed her hand on top of his, Harry squeezed it tight and brought it to his lips.
“Harry!” Maggie’s shout made Harry jump. He told Ezi that he would be right back and hurried to the hallway to see what Maggie needed. But Maggie had brought another guest home with her.
“Dawson?”
“This handsome boy saw me at the station, and I told him about Ezi so he wanted to come check on her,” Maggie said as she unzipped her boots. Meanwhile, Dawson stood there holding two grocery bags and gave Harry a tight-lipped smile.
Maggie headed to the kitchen, and the men followed. Watching Dawson put away the groceries, Harry couldn’t even act like he wasn’t upset. He came to stand beside Maggie by the table. “You told him about Ezi?”
“He’s her friend, isn’t he?”
“Yeah, but not every friend of hers needs to know.”
“Harry, I’m literally right here. I can hear you.”
“Yeah, I know, Dawson. You shouldn’t even be here.”
Eyes narrowed, Maggie flicked her finger between them. “I sense some tension here. Is there any rivalry backstory that I need to know?”
“No,” Harry and Dawson said at the same time, but it was obvious in the death stare they’d been giving each other. What was Dawson doing here anyway? Harry thought that it was clear that Ezi wasn’t interested in him. Why was he so persistent? Ezi probably didn’t even want to see hi—
“Dawson!”
“Ezi!”
Harry’s jaw dropped when Ezi – now with clothes on and her hair in a towel – limped into the kitchen to embrace Dawson. Okay, rude. What about their romantic moment in the bathroom?
“I’m so sorry for running away without an explanation,” Ezi said, eyes squeezed shut, still holding Dawson like he was a lifeboat in the middle of the storm. Harry tried to act unbothered, but it did make his skin crawl.
“It’s okay. I’m glad that you’re okay now. Maggie told me about your car crash.”
“Car crash?” Ezi blinked at Dawson, then whipped her head to Maggie and Harry. “You lied to him?”
“Well, I…I didn’t know if he knew…”
“He doesn’t,” Harry told Maggie.
Ezi let out and sigh and took Dawson’s hands. “I can’t keep lying to my friends, and I think you of all people should know the truth.”
“Erm, Ezi?” Harry spoke, but Ezi ignored him and told Dawson to take a seat, then sat down beside him. Harry opened his mouth but Maggie shushed him so Ezi could talk.
There was no way this was a good idea. Dawson would think Ezi was wrong in the head for admitting that she was actually a mythical creature. He wouldn’t believe her, but on second thought, maybe that would be for the best. If Dawson didn’t believe Ezi, he would leave, and Harry wouldn’t have to worry about him anymo—
“I believe you.”
“What?” Harry gasped, causing all heads to turn to him. Quickly, he sat down at the table across from his cousin. “You believe that she’s a siren? Really?”
“Yes.”
“Be fucking for real. You’re only saying that because you’re a simp.”
“Harry!” Ezi gasped, but Harry hadn’t said anything he didn’t mean.
“He probably thinks you’re crazy, Ezi. He doesn’t actually believe this without proof.”
“Well, I’ve spent enough time with her to know that she’s not just odd because she’s American, Harry. And to be honest, her being a siren is better than her being American.”
“Thank you, Dawson.”
“Absolutely ridiculous,” Harry hissed as he slumped back into his chair, arms crossed like an angry child.
Ezi sighed. “Guys, can you let me talk to Harry for a sec?”
“Yeah, sure, Dawson, come. I’d be happy to answer any of your questions about us,” Maggie said as she pulled Dawson up by his arm.
“Us? Wait, so you’re also a siren???” Dawson said before his voice faded into the hallway.
Now alone with Harry, Ezi’s smile was gone. “What the hell? Why were you acting like a dick?”
Harry leaned across the table so he could whisper angrily to her so the other two couldn’t hear. “Because you didn’t need to drag my cousin into this. He doesn’t have to be involved.”
“I’m tired of lying,” Ezi said. “And who cares if he knows? It’s not gonna change anything.”
Harry let out an exaggerated exhale as he threw his hands in the air. “Because he’s going to want to help, and if he dies, my mother will kill me. Maggie and I are enough help around here.”
“Who says any of you is gonna help me?” Ezi scoffed. “Tomorrow, I will come up with a plan and confront my mother on my own. I just don’t want to leave this world without telling the truth. I owe it to everyone here.”
“Wow, you’re so fucking strong and independent, aren’t you? You have to do everything on your own. I swear to God, Ezi, for fucking once, let other people help.”
Her eyes went wide with feigned shock. “Oh, what are you gonna do? You’re gonna punch my mother in the face when she shows up to rip out your heart? I think you humans underestimate how easily we can—"
“Listen," he cut her off, "when you told me you were willing to die for me, I told myself that I would not let that happen again. We’ll come up with something, but I want to help. After all, I will be her new target when she finds out the heart Koa brought to her isn’t real. Also, how did you manage to get a pig’s heart??? You know what? It doesn’t matter. What’s important is that I need to be there with you, and you can't get rid of me."
Worry edged into Ezi’s expression. “How do I know you won't abandon me again?"
"You need to trust me this time."
"Trust should be earned, not given."
"I'll earn it then. Just...don't push me away."
Ezi's expression immediately softened, and Harry knew he had said the right thing. Even though he wasn't sure if he was forgiven or not, it was reassuring to know she still wanted to give him another chance.
"I gotta go check on Dawson and make sure Maggie hasn’t traumatised him.”
Ezi pushed herself up from her chair, and Harry quickly got up to help her. “You know, if push comes to shove, we should sacrifice Dawson.”
With her arm around his neck, she shot him a glare. “Harry.”
“Sorry, sorry, just a thought,” he said, grinning.
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cupcakeslushie · 6 months
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I just wanted to draw a baby. Just an absolute little man. A small guy. A widdle dude.
Thank you @somerandomdudelmao for this adorable infant Leo.
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uselessnbee · 5 months
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something i can't stop thinking about is the fact that Percy Jackson started as a comfort story for Rick's son to show him that his adhd and dyslexia doesn't have to be just a bad thing and the fandom then took Percy and Leo and made them into these stupid idiots that don't even know basic math or "big" words and wouldn't be able to even tie their shoelaces without someone else's (someone smarter's) help
don't yall see how fucked up that is? a big part of this fandom has adhd and/or dyslexia and/or other learning disabilities/neurodivergence and find comfort in those characters. they are called lazy and stupid all the time and then yall decided to take characters with those disabilities and ignore their inteligence and made them into something they are not just because their adhd is more "visible" (read more stereotypical looking) (even tho that's not true either because the fandom made them into chaotic gremlins but in reality Percy is more just sarcastic and snarky and even that is more just his internal monologue for his own amusment and to cope and Leo just uses humor as a coping mechanism to hide his depression and other issues but that's a discussion for another time)
Percy is canonically very smart and strategic. no he isn't very good at school. it's what happens when you're neurodivergent and have learning disabilities. that doesn't mean he's stupid. no he doesn't know everything about greek mythology and that doesn't make him stupid either. but when Annabeth tells him the myth he is very good at coming up with strategies and how to win a fight. he's not smart as Annabeth because Annabeth is literally a daughter of the goddess of wisdom so stop fucking comparing them. are you also going to call Annabeth weak and incapable because she can't control water? no you won't because that's fucking stupid. and Leo. fucking Leo. is literally canonically a mathematic genius and also genius when it comes building stuff. they're both smart. they're not fucking stupid. they know and understand words that are longer than 5 letters. no they do not struggle with basic knowledge. they're not fucking stupid.
and miss me with the "it's just a joke" bullshit
jokes are supposed to be funny
and it's not just a joke for many of you because the number of fanfics where they are written in exactly this way is too fucking high. it's actually surprising to find a fanfic where they are written right
in conclusion: the way this fandom portrays Percy and Leo is reinforcing the harmful misconception that people with adhd and/or other learning disabilities are stupid and i hate it with a burning passion
call me sensitive all you want i'll gladly accept it i will rather be called sensitive for hating that those characters are being treated this way than follow the fandoms harmful idea about them
thank you for coming to my ted talk <3
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house-of-tykayl · 22 days
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pretty old AU idea by now but basically the TTG gremlins are 1) very small and 2) infest the TTA tower like cockroaches
and 3) TTA starfire wont let TTA robin kill them
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sweetestbasil · 2 months
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RUBATOSIS || chapter one: self digestion
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PAIRING : Dr.Gaul's Assistant!Coriolanus Snow x Experiment!Reader-Insert ( afab, they / them, sometimes it )
RATING : 18+ ( no smut in this chapter, but it's very unsettling )
WORD COUNT : 13, 776
WARNINGS : infidelity ( coryo's engaged to livia ), power imbalance, unreliable narrator ( it's 3rd POV but focuses on coryo's view ), unhealthy dynamics, dehumanizing language, medical experimentation, body examination that has... strange vibes, body horror-esque, coryo and gaul are messed up in this fic, he's more like his book version than movie
SUMMARY : 🙶 rubatosis - noun. the unsettling awareness of your own heartbeat 🙷
Fortune, marriage, and success - all within the hands of Coriolanus Snow, and it still isn’t enough to satisfy him. Tigris has grown distant and Livia is far more trouble than it's worth. 
Dr. Gaul has just the solution for him.
A/N : This is my first time posting my fanfic work on tumblr, so I hope everyone has fun reading this. If there are any mistakes, lemme know. This is the first of five chapters!
[ If you want to read it on AO3 instead ]
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self digestion || autolysis - stage one of decomposition 
Oh, he hated this. 
He absolutely despised this.
A click of the soles, stepping against the freshly clean sidewalk, rid of any possible careless litter and debris. Had it not been for others who, too, were using the same path, even if they were going in opposite directions, had he half a mind, Coriolanus would have taken the moment to prop himself against a wall and let out the loudest sound of frustration. It wouldn’t be unwarranted, it wouldn’t be uncalled for. Dare he say, he almost feels he should be entitled to it. It had only been four days, but four days should have been enough time for Tigris to get back to him already. The correspondence was not even something of dire content, at least, Coriolanus imagined so. Questions of Grandma’am, if her time with Mrs. Plinth ( he was not going to refer to her as ‘Ma Plinth’ ) had been going well, how was the solo business venture regarding Tigris’s fashion going, was there any renovations that the home needed, how were they — things that he assumed, wrongly he guessed, that would be so simple to answer. 
God forbid that he still had the decency to still check in with his family even after he long moved out into his own place. 
If Tigris thought she could play him for a fool, she was the one in the wrong; the signs were as clear as can be, that Tigris was trying to ice him out as much as she could. And after all he’s worked hard for? Fixing the home up, making sure the fridge never stays empty, stabilizing the family. He’s even gotten engaged before Grandma’am could even croak, and is letting Tigris design his fiancé’s wedding gown! What else was he supposed to do to try and gain back her warmth? Dance and clap like a District to make himself seem smaller, more dumb, to please her? There was a lock to his jaw, a small grit in Coriolanus’s teeth, as he sipped down the coffee in his hand, the other in his coat pocket. 
He didn’t even wish to broach the idea of his fiancé on his walk to the Citadel. The heavy breath, a sigh, that breached itself out his lips. A hand raised to rub a gloved thumb briefly at the bridge of his nose. 
Ugh, Livia… It was a pain to even internally taste the words of her name on his tongue. 
It was an arranged marriage of convenience that he sought after, an extra piggy bank that he could expend on; and how quickly the elder Cardews lapped up at his palm when he planted the idea of marrying their daughter. A man who was of the old guard elite families, an assistant of Dr. Gaul’s, inheritor of the Plinth’s fortune, a gamemaker in training? They were downright salivating, that he almost felt embarrassed for Livia having to witness her parents’ stripped to their barest of greeds. The keyword being almost. Coriolanus needed to play his cards right to ensure his future, it was only fair game. If that meant taking his chance with the Cardews’ and their banks, he’d be just the fool that Tigris would want him to be if he turned them away. But, he could reluctantly suppose that the arrangement could be considered an equal drain on both parties. He seized their assets and their daughter seized up his free time. How could he forget the fundraiser dinner that Livia had invited them both to later on in the evening? She was delightful enough to remind him of it while they shared breakfast together, between his bites of quiche so that he couldn’t show a hint of a frown. 
Coriolanus sucked in a careful breath between his teeth. 
If she could only put herself to better use than just the one redeeming quality of a socialite. There was a slim chance he may have miscalculated. Perhaps it would have been an easier time, having something set up with Clemensia, or Lysistrata. 
“Mr. Snow! Good morning and welcome back, Dr. Gaul is already waiting for you in—“ 
“In Lab H05, got it! And a good morning to you, too.” He smiled back effortlessly to the front desk worker, giving them a wave and just the right, charming amount of teeth with the upwards pull of his mouth. 
Entering into the Citadel and seeing the hive of workers shift from one place to another in constant movement; they all tried to keep their voices at a low volume, but there was a constant buzz in the air, as they went from one hall to the other. Coriolanus maneuvered himself around them, slipping his deep mahogany overcoat seamlessly folded across his forearm. Full-Grain leather gloves that kept him warm from the cold, taken off his hands and instead placed neatly into the pocket of his overcoat. What a marvel it would have been for his young, naïve self to bear witness the luxury of a full wardrobe he now had. Never again did he have to spend long nights studying for the Academy besides an equally tired Tigris, who busied herself with trimming down the sizes of his father’s discarded shirts to fit him for school the next day. 
It was a muscle memory at this point, the path to one of the many labs that Dr. Gaul had established her practice in. She had told Coriolanus that she had a lab for each different study and project she was passionate towards, ones that were more… presentable, to the average Capital citizen, and ones that were more uncensored. Having worked for over a year under Dr. Gaul’s tutelage, Coriolanus had seen a decent amount, the clean and the vile, but even then, he knew very well he had not seen all. He wasn’t even sure if he did want to see all. Especially regarding what happened last time he wandered around the Citadel during Academy days. The doors to Lab H05 were wide open, Coriolanus noted, seeing it in his line of sight, getting closer and closer. It was inviting, telling any worker to come in and step in at any time ( should Dr. Gaul be around ). 
The air here was entirely different from what it was in the hallway. Where the air from when he first entered had been warm, inviting from the nipping cold outside. The vague smell of coffee, and an even fainter scent of something chemical, had mingled and intertwined to give the vaguest illusion that the Citadel could pass for a workplace like any other. However, the lab was as if entering an entirely different building. The lights that shone uncomfortably glaring, fluorescent lights that were hung overhead, on the ceiling. There were small lights, embedded into the floors and columns as well, guiding the path to any who walked in. It drowned the large room in an almost blue light. Lab H05 was one of the “clean” labs. A sterile scent in the air, the chemicals that were so faint in the halls were far more prominent, evident here. But, to the trained nose, there was something faint here too. The rusted scent of iron tickled under Coriolanus’s nose, but it barely registered to him anymore as anything concerning. Seeing the endless shelves of… odd specimens, the scent of blood was the last thing that should ever scare him away. 
“Dr. Gaul, good morning,” He kept a steady tone, not one that sounded tired, nor too joyous. Being seen as her “favorite” didn’t mean he could speak to her as casually as he pleased. It just meant that he took her current attention. A fickle thing that could be stripped away at any moment if he showed any less than acceptable. 
“Coryo,” He tensed his shoulders the same time she breathed it out in loving fashion. Her back once facing him, now turned as she walks towards him to cut the distance between the two. Since the gap started to form between Tigris and him, Dr. Gaul had taken to using that nickname on him. If it was to be used in terms of endearing him to her, or to mock him with the name that ghosts had called him, none could say for sure.
Coriolanus liked to believe it to be both, if he believed his assumptions of her character were right.
He never once let his eyes leave contact with her own, but he could hear the movement of her prominent, red latex gloves being peeled off her hands. She always thought it to be ironic, to wear such a color despite her profession. It matched the dye job that she had done on her surgical gown. He felt the weight of hands touching either side of his forearms, the smile on Dr. Gaul’s face caused a crinkle in her eyes as she bared all teeth in her smile. He wondered if she knew how threatening her grin looked.
“A morning to you as well. Has it been treating you good?”  
It felt as if some sort of warm feeling was spreading out from Dr. Gaul’s hands, through his arms and into his body. What a disgusting sensation, it made goosebumps rise on his skin. 
“As well as it could be.” Coriolanus’s voice spoke softly. 
Livia drained his energy far more than he expected with her morning rambles and gossip. 
Dr. Gaul’s hands smacked against his arms in a laugh, loud and knowing, she always knew, turning around to walk deeper in the lab. “Hah! By the sounds of it, it seems you’re not getting some peace of mind when you head home,” She turned back to look at him, giving him a glance, she was prying something out of him. “That’s no good, Coryo. You need to be in top shape to work, I can’t have my assistant become so… drained.” 
The crease in her eyes showed again. 
“If this is your preferred state, there is a new species of leeches I am working on. I assure you it is far more efficient than a Cardew of species.”
Well, now it was his turn to laugh. 
A dry chuckle that slipped from Coriolanus’s lips, moving to follow Dr. Gaul. Placing his coat on a table made of rich wood, something less… aseptic looking. There were moments where he often froze under the woman’s gaze; a humiliating, bodily reaction that made him feel so small, so vulnerable as he used to be. Yet, it was in times like these, where he could understand how Dr. Gaul still managed to hold sway over people besides just exemplary displays of fear and power. There was a sense of humor to her, if he could call it that, where if a powerful woman like her involved yourself in - you felt so included, special. 
“It was nothing like that. Livia just reminded me that after work today, she and I have to attend dinner later in the evening. It’s a fundraiser for the improvement and reconstruction of the Corso.” He turned his sight away from Dr. Gaul’s eyes, not being able to keep the contact any more. Flicking to the sight of the endless, bright shelves that lit up the tubes containing various specimens and experiments. Some failures, some on pauses, some successes, and some were just creative ‘what-ifs’; that would explain some of the seemingly useless fusions, like the jellyfish that had spider legs mixed in with some of its natural lappets, now encased in a resin tube. Coriolanus can’t recall if he was employed at the Citadel yet when this specimen was made. His fingers briefly touched upon the cool glass of it. What a disgusting idea. “I almost nearly forgot about it.” Dr. Gaul hummed at his response. 
“Why, doesn’t that sound riveting! What a joy young life is, flitting from one function to the other, all the night-time glamor. You know, before I was transferred to work in the Citadel, I was the same. I thought of giving my children some of my old wardrobe from my youth, but it’s so out of the current trends, it just collects dust now.” What a blessing, for her kids. They could avoid the embarrassment of coming into the room looking as if they robbed the Pre-Dark Days exhibit at the Capital’s museum. The heels of Dr. Gaul’s heels clicked against the smooth, waxed floor. Coriolanus could feel the brief sliver of her heavy presence pass him by from behind, as she went to head over to another area in the room. It sounded vaguely close to the center of it. 
“You must be excited, Coryo. Are you going to wear,” Her words paused. She was tasting the air for something. “Ah, what’s her name… That cousin of yours, the one who started her new business a while ago.”
What was the point of this conversation?
“Tigris.” 
A brief flare tickled behind his ribs, reminding him of his thoughts earlier before. Standing up from his spot, fingers now leaving the glass of the odd ( sickening ) creature, his prints left slightly behind on the glass. Stretching his shoulders back with his arms, muscles pulled, away from their previously hunched position. Coriolanus walked over to where Dr. Gaul was, who stood nearby another table at the center of the lab. This time, this one was far cleaner, made of what seemed to be a material of stainless steel. In her hands she carried a manila folder, or two, in her hands; her painted nails sifted through the papers carefully. She was writing something quickly down inside of it. He wanted to know, but he held his tongue. Gaul would tell him if it was something he needed to be aware of. 
“And I’m not sure. Livia is still picking out her dress and I want to match with her.” He smiled at her. 
“Aren’t you a romantic,” She gives him a look out of the corner of her eye, the blue one that matched his. It made his skin crawl, he hated the feeling of it. “Is your heart melting, Snow?”
Coriolanus hopes she sticks to her career as a Gamemaker, being a comedian looks like a bleak future for her. 
The smile on his lips grew wider, a small laugh at her words, his hand reaching to cover his mouth slightly to muffle the sound in the large room. 
“I wouldn’t say that just yet.” 
He wouldn’t say it at all. Livia? Melt his heart? Sure, she could melt his eardrums when she had that obnoxious snort to her loud laughs. It made her sound like a pig, shipped straight to the Capital from the farms of District 10. That would defeat the purpose of why he married her in the first place. It would be the utmost betrayal to himself, after he had promised to close himself after– 
“Since you have a date tonight,” His ears perked up immediately. “I’ll reduce the amount of work you have for today, I’ll be merciful.” He wouldn’t argue if she decided to give him more. She pressed a manila folder into his open hands, her grip was tight on it. This was a folder that not many eyes needed to be on. Taking it carefully from her hands, he raised it to his eyesight curiously, catching the sight of the project name written on top of it. 
PROJECT: CAPTIVE – A.01 PROMETHEUS 
Coriolanus brought his gaze back towards Dr. Gaul. He assumed he slipped a confused gaze at her, because before he could even ask her, she’s already speaking up:
“This is a project I had started around the time you were exiled in District 12.” 
His jaw slightly tightened. She didn’t have to use that exact word to describe it. 
“It’s far more… unique,” Her eyes rolled around the room as she sought out the word, the moment it landed on her tongue, she locked her sight immediately onto him. Gaul’s smile pulled a bit more at her cheeks, a festering excitement that was slipping out from her internal confines. The threat of teeth in her smile was no longer an attempt of niceties, but far more sinister in its intentions. Coriolanus would argue on a good day that both were the same, that Dr. Gaul’s cruelty was her being kind. “Than my other projects. Far more different than any of my other muttations, this is a beast of a different breed, but one that you and I know intimately well.”
 So this was a human experimentation, Coriolanus deduced. 
Dr. Gaul would never dare to refer to those below Capital ranks as something human, there was always something else she had to refer to them by. Animal, beast, plague, insect, if it stripped them of their humanity, she was eager to take it. They shared similar sentiments, but sometimes, he had to give them some form of distinct name to separate them. “I’ve actually grown quite fond of it. Usually, I’d handle its tests and exams, but you seem like you need a pick-me-up.” 
It should make him disgusted at how easily she could see through him. 
The older woman stepped further away from him, into one of the dark recesses of the room. Lab H05 was one of the main center labs within the Citadel, meaning it earned itself the privilege to have its layout be connected to other rooms, outside areas, halls, and the like. It just happened to be, the darker areas that Gaul was heading in were towards the direction of one of the elevators connected to the room. Coriolanus watched her body retreat into the dimly lit area, not quite following after her. He didn’t know why. His hands felt stiff with the folder in his hands. The pounding beat of his heart in his ears matched in tempo with the steps of her heels against the floor. If he was going to move, she was going to need to ask him. She knew too, the doctor knew her own footsteps, and she was very aware when others’ joined in. Turning around to look at where he still was, standing, watching, she looked back at him. Coriolanus could make out her faint silhouette in the dark, but Dr. Gaul’s blue eyes shone brighter in the dark. As if she had tapetum lucidum, how it reflected so wildly. She was not helping the rumors made against her, that questioned if she ever used herself for a subject of fascination. 
“Come now, Coryo. You don’t want to waste time.”
A silence fell upon them both. 
“Understood, I’m right behind you.”
Walking after her, Coriolanus descended the small set of stairs that she had gone down from, he stepped into the dimly lit area. The manila folder was still grasped tightly in his one hand, at his side. He didn’t understand it, he didn’t understand her. Yes, she said that she wanted to cheer him up, but he’d be a fool if he was to believe that’d was to be the only reason why she was doing this. Volumnia Gaul, telling confidential secrets because she cared for his well being? No, there was always something else. An ulterior motive she wished to serve, or a lesson she wanted to teach. When he was brought back from his sentence of being a peacekeeper, it was not because her heart broke over him. She was not weeping at him having to tread his feet into the muck and grime of District 12. It was because she was holding him up to an ambition that both him and her both wished to see. 
“This one,” Dr. Gaul started her words, occasionally turning her head to the side to make sure he was still following her ( he was ). “Started out as a simple curiosity. I had to sit with myself quite a bit to figure out a punishment that would actually serve some productivity.” Her hands reached behind her, flicking at the folder that Coriolanus was holding. He opened up the folder, finally, to look through the report. Whatever the Doctor was gesturing vaguely in conversation, it would be more explicit in her writings. “Displays of cadavers, desecration of the human silhouette, trauma to the cerebrum, these punishments can only go for so long before new ideas must be made. If the rebels expect the same disciplinary action, you can expect them to gain a tolerance to it.”
Squinting at the paper, he leaned his head slightly down to get a closer look of the subject. A small photo was attached to the report by a paperclip, it was a person who seemed to be in a similar age group to his. They looked clean, proper - they wore an ironed, white button up shirt under a dark vest, with unique, yet simple earrings they donned on. Pearls and tiny opals that dangled from a gold chain earring. A family heirloom, if Coriolanus had to guess. They smiled widely in the photo. Their teeth weren’t perfect, their upper cuspid was a bit more pointed in comparison to all others. 
They had once been a capital citizen, turned rebel, to… this. 
“I wanted to truly push my mind forward, and see if the impossible would truly be… well, possible.” Dr. Gaul grinned at the end of the sentence. Coriolanus lifted the photo up, after hooking his gaze unto the former for a moment. It’s a shame, he thought to himself. How pretty they are, had they not tainted their mind with childish ideas they would have continued to live in the comforts that they were so comfortably lavishing in before. He was curious as to whose family they once belonged to. A filthy curiosity enticed him, a want to digest more at the report at the risk of tuning out Gaul’s feverish ramblings. 
“Personally, I outdid myself.”
There was a small desire to curse her under his breath, the writing for the subject’s name was far too rushed and messy to read properly. Did she want him to read the report, or play word scramble? 
Dr. Gaul’s steps had stopped, the white noise of her chatter turned to silence was enough to bring his head back from the report. She stood between him and the elevator, holding her hands in front of her, folded. Peeking to the side, the button for the down level was lit up in a glow of red. Her smile widened. 
“Curiosity eating away at you, Coryo?” 
It still made his skin crawl, everytime she used that name. How frightening it was, that it also brought him a strange sense of the coldest warmth. 
“You’ve talked so vividly about them,” Not clear enough. “I want to see what makes you so excited about them.” He wants to see if they could come close to bringing him out of his frustrations. Fingers that touched the edge of the subject’s photo twitched in tempo with the small ding of the elevator. Doors opening, Dr. Gaul stepped to the side. Hands gestured, letting him know to step in first which he obliged. Yet, no other steps than his own followed him in. Coriolanus turned around, a puzzled look on his face when he noticed how Dr. Gaul was standing in the middle of the elevator’s doors. 
“Expected me to come join you? You can’t be so attached to my hip, Coryo.” She laughed, her hands reached in between her surgical gown and work attire. Pulling out a set of keys attached to her worker’s ID, she tugged a key off. Dr. Gaul dipped her body slightly in to twist at a lock that had revealed another panel of floor buttons aside from the usual floor ones. This must have been the key designated for the Citadel’s researchers and engineers. He had a private key of his own, but that was reserved for Game Makers. Still in training, but Dr. Gaul had persuaded the others to give him his own copy. “I have other things that need tending to, so you’ll have to have your fun without me.” Pushing a floor button that was labeled C09, glowing red under her touch, she gave him her key. She pressed into Coriolanus’s free palm, closing his fingers to clasp around it. 
“You can keep this one. I’ll ask for another copy.”
Was it because this one almost seemed rusted over to hell and back? Coriolanus wasn’t an idiot. He could feel the textured sensation of something that, usually, was supposed to be smooth metal. 
“Thank you, Dr. Gaul.” He spoke softly back to her. 
Dr. Gaul sent him another smile towards his way, the abominable sight of her gradually leaving his sight as the doors closed. A divide now between the both of them. 
Instantly, a breath of air was released from Coriolanus. His head reeled back, eyes closed,  leaning against the wall of the elevator. He was now by himself. Free from that imposing woman, he finally could be released from her watchful gaze. Always gauging him, examining him as if he, too, was another subject on her surgical table. Perhaps, in a strange, distant sense, he was. Which is why he likes it far more when their interactions are limited. Even if it makes him feel guilty if he hasn’t spoken to her for any prolonged amount of time. 
Another breath, he brought his head back down, eyes open. Opening his hand to where the key was held in his hand. It was frighteningly warm in his hand, most likely from when both Dr. Gaul and him held onto it. The material of the key was dark in color, rust having formed around some of the edges. Spots of dark stains marred its dull shine, it almost looks black in contrast to the key’s natural dark hue. This most definitely was blood, now dried. In his head, Coriolanus could see the vivid picture in his head: Dr. Gaul barely bothering to remove her gloves after leaving the examination room, holding the key between sticky gloves. A sneer pulled on Coriolanus’s face. He pocketed the key away. 
He wanted to focus on something else. 
The weight of the manila report at his side stuck out glaringly obvious, he still had yet to fully read through everything. His fingers were still thumbing between one of the pages, bookmarking a random place in the report. Should he wait to see the project on his own? Give himself something ‘fun’ to surprise himself with? A discomfort prickled at the hairs on his neck. No, he didn’t like surprises too much. Surprises meant no control, and no control meant chaos that wasn’t under his hand. And what more could be asked, when what he needed to know was right here. Hands flipped back open the manila folder while he waited for the elevator to finish its descent. 
On the first page, there was only one photo of the subject, before the project had started. Dr. Gaul was always so thorough, so there must have been more to see. And how he loved to be right, when the sight of more clipped on photos peeked through in between pages. He stopped at the sight of them. These had been nude, taken in what was most definitely an examination room. They must’ve been in captivity for a few days for how haggard they looked. Gleam completely gone, with only a dark emptiness seen on their face. Signs of minimal swelling on their left cheek from when they were hit by a peacekeeper when resisting arrest. Bags under the optics, suggesting either sleep deprivation or developed insomnia. His eyes lingered on the photos that took in zoomed in shots of identifiable beauty marks that were scattered around their body. One around the back of their left acromial, around the sternocleidomastoid, one on the left mammary gland, and another on the right femoral muscle. Unconsciously, his fingers traced along the edges of each photo as he examined them until they traced after the words of ink. 
The objective of the project: engaging and testing pain receptors on the subject. By use of non-licensed medication and surgical operations, the subject’s NTRK1 gene was mutated to a certain extent to gain the closest imitation to Congenital Analgesia ( while still keeping the subject alive ). If Coriolanus recalled, in his textbooks, Congenital Analgesia was a condition that always was given to a patient by a pass down from the parent. It was never really something ‘made’, or ‘given’. He could understand now why Dr. Gaul was so pleased with herself for accomplishing this feat. Curiosity was beckoning him, wanting to see more of what the report entailed. 
Pages dedicated to each operation, each test done. There were pain charts made, scales from 1 to 10, to test out the nerve receptors. Each test, the numbers on the chart went lower and lower; 10s that went to 9s, to the current lowest being a 6 for the majority of the subject’s body. The more sensitive areas, such as the frontal or the palmar of the body, were around 7 to 8 on the chart. Flipping to the back of the contents, there was a small note in Dr. Gaul’s handwriting.
Today, please take care of Project Prometheus’s nerve exams. The last surgical operation was done last month and they have just now fully recovered. Update the report by the end of today, to measure if there are any fluctuations on their pain receptors.
Sounded simple enough. If this was all he had to do today, then there was a chance he could clock out from work even earlier to give himself space before tonight’s event. A ding finally was heard from the elevator, he was here at Lab C09. Folder closed in his hands, his foot stepped out of the elevator and onto the floor. What a drastic difference Lab C09 had been in comparison to Lab H05. If it hadn’t belonged to Dr. Gaul, Coriolanus may not have been able to believe that this was an actual functioning lab. It almost seemed forgotten by the Citadel, half of the fluorescent lights not working, or blinking at different intervals. It bathed the floor in a very gray, almost vile green hue. The scent of copper and rust was far more noticeable, and the smell of medicine felt almost nauseous here. There were no grand columns in sight, and no endless amount of shelves dedicated to new specimens and ideas of creation. The floors were unkempt, specks of dirt packed into the corners of where the wall and once sleek tiles met. Occasional cracks on the floor, parts of the design broken and shattered into bits of ceramic. The halls were long, with endless doors that ( thankfully ) all were open, empty, or both. With the exception of the large corridor doors at the other end. He could make out the sight of Peacekeepers that stood on guard, near the corridor door and by the elevator entrance. 
This definitely was Dr. Gaul’s more… uncensored labs. 
Coriolanus took a few more steps into the lab and noticed the large stain of dried blood that dragged from where his feet stood, past the corridor doors. Eyebrows raised at the sight, but his eyes did not widen. Marvelous, the subject might still be rebellious. If this was to be the case, he’d be severely unimpressed. All these exams to change the NTRK1 and nothing done to affect the amygdala. 
Sloppy work here, Dr. Gaul. 
Pushing through the corridor doors, after giving the briefest of nods and acknowledgement towards the Peacekeepers, he found himself exactly where he needed to be. Entering an area that was entirely void of light, except for one thing. 
A large window glass on the other side, showing the examination room on the other side. It lit up this half of the hall, shelves of varying medicines and chemicals lined against the walls of the examination room. Surgical tools were lined up high on the wall, out of reach, not yet pulled out and placed on the side. Today there was no operation to be done. Examination lights shone overhead, and under it was the examination table where Project Prometheus sat. 
They sat down so compactly, so politely, knees folded to their chest and arms wrapped around them, their face leaned against the crevice their legs gave. The subject definitely had changed, physically, since the projects had begun. Their skin barely had the warm glow it had in their photo, had it not been for the peeks of color on their joints, he’d assume that there was no more blood rushing through their body. Their hair that once looked so well maintained, luxurious, was cut at awkward angles. Yet, it still managed to frame their face well enough. Figures, that was former Capital genes at work. Their body has taken significant damage since then. Scars of various shapes were scattered all across, bandages wrapped in some areas, and stitches that dragged around entire limbs, like their arms, thighs, feet, even one on their face. As if they were some over-played ragdoll that was patched up far too many times. There was no fight he could see from their eyes, and no anger. Was the blood on the floor halls really theirs, or did that belong to someone else?
This could not even be called anything, but a shell of a husk. 
Coriolanus stood there, watching, taking in the sight of them. It barely felt like he was breathing. And that alone irritated him. It’s like his body was trying to make itself seem smaller; as if he was somehow bothering them. He sighed out his frustration, pinching the bridge of his nose. They couldn’t even hear him from the thick glass, what would he be so concerned with? Bringing his hand back down, about to open the manila folder once again to compare their ID photo to their current state - he peeked at their form again. 
He had been noticed by it. 
His breath felt lodged in his throat, his original action now tossed to the side, as they and him both just… watched each other. Their eyes that had looked so sullen and distant before, were so focused and vigilant of him. But, they didn’t seem scared of him. Their body didn’t look tense, their expression didn’t twist into any wrinkles. What feeling was running through their body? Could they possibly feel anything? Coriolanus stepped away from the glass, slowly, and down further into the hall, to where the door of their examination room was. A peacekeeper stood guard near the heavy door, beside them a surgical gown, cap, goggles and gloves were on a hook. Excusing the other to the side, so he could reach and grab the attire to put on himself. Coriolanus questioned, as he tugged the latex rubber gloves on, if he still wanted to entertain the idea of holding their test today. Teeth grinded inside his jaw, he hated to admit weakness, but it was no lie that they unsettled him when they had stared back. 
That probably contributed to why Dr. Gaul favored the project so much, both must take joy from bringing him such unease. A sigh hissed from his teeth, as he put the surgical mask on. 
“I’ll be back out in just a moment. I’ll let you know if an emergency comes up.” 
It’ll be easy work, and then he can leave.
Opening the door, the sterile smell of the room rushed past him as the metal door was moved from its tight seal and then closed heavily behind him. Their head had moved away from where the glass window was, turned to stare at where he stood near the door, their folder still in his hands. Thinly-veiled sweat was forming inside the gloves, with the silence that fell heavy in the room. He opened the folder. 
“Good morning, Subject A01, I am–”
…? 
Did they say something? 
“...I’m sorry, did you say something?”
Another tense silence fell in the air. 
“... That isn’t my name.” Its voice was quiet, slightly hoarse but not entirely. Unexpected, considering their length of stay here. His fingers pinched tightly at one of the pages. 
“...What do you mean?” He was not going to call them by their Capital name. They had long since lost the right to use it, after rebelling against Panem. 
“Dr. Gaul calls me something else.” Coriolanus was going to kill it if they did not clarify. 
“And what does she call you?” This was the nicest tone he could muster. 
They spoke it once into the air, still looking at him with those dead eyes of theirs. Had Dr. Gaul been so fond of it to have given it an entirely new name? And they accepted and went along with it? That didn’t feel right, from what he’s examined about them so far. They were a rebel, they had fought against a Peacekeeper, they were dragged around the halls bleeding. 
And they gave up their old name?
It had shifted out of its cradled position, their legs dangled off the examination table and their arms were placed on their side. Coriolanus could see the patient gown they wore more clearly. It kicked its feet in the air idly, as it waited for his response. 
… Do they even know the situation that they’re in? 
“...Right. Well, do you know why I’m here?” 
“Not really. I’ve never met you before.” Was context clues also something it gave up while in captivity? “I know the guards, and I know Dr. Gaul. I don’t think I know about you,” They’re a prisoner, it’d be counter-intuitive if people were giving them info about every single staff member here. His mask covered the lower half of his face, but he hoped the slight shift of facial muscle was enough to convey that was trying to smile towards them. He walked further into the examination room, closer to where it sat and where the shelves of drugs and medical equipment were lined up. Their stare was burrowing holes into his back, while he shifted around, opening and closing shelves and drawers to check inside for what he needed. 
“Well, I am Dr. Gaul’s assistant. You can call me Snow,” He was not giving his first name to a former rebel. “I’m here today because Dr. Gaul is a bit busy today to handle your check-up, so I’ll be filling in her role.” Gloves shifted bottles around, turning them around to read the labels. The disinfectant, cotton swabs, tweezers, needles, rubbing alcohol, syringes, the bite-rag, marker, he had it all except the custom medicine that Dr. Gaul had made for it. In the instructions of how to construct their exam, Dr. Gaul had explicitly mentioned that they were to take specific medication, as they had helped keep it conscious at all times for operations and exams. It was needed so that they’d be able to relay the ratings, which is why Coriolanus was reading yet another prescription bottle in his hands, squinting in frustration. 
“It’s this bottle over here.” 
A delicate, scarred hand had pointed at another bottle that sat idly on the shelf. Coriolanus turned his head slightly, seeing the subject no longer on the examination table, standing behind him quietly. Not staring at him, they were entirely looking at where their hand pointed. They were only standing just a couple inches away from his body, careful not to touch him as they stood on the tips of their toes to point at the medicine. With this proximity, it was easier for him to get a closer look at them. The stitches on its body were done with thick, prominent threads; there were far more beauty marks he could pick out on their face that the photos didn’t display. The patient gown was made from a material far thinner than he expected, a visible silhouette could be seen from underneath the flimsy cloth. His mouth felt unusually dry. 
A cold chill trickled down his spine. He barely noticed them. He doesn’t even think it made a sound when it moved. 
“Careful, keep your space from me.” He spoke, a careful warning to their ears and a threatening promise on his. He didn’t want to risk being so close to them like this, he barely knew the extent of how violent the project could possibly be yet. Still, they listened, backing away from him and putting their hand back down to their side. Both it and him stared at each other again, the tense air dancing back inside the room. They looked as if they had wanted to say something, and Coriolanus, internally, felt almost violent for how demure they were being with him. It repulsed him, how it felt almost endearing if he looked at them for a second more. 
“Is something wrong?” Eventually he bit the bullet, speaking first between the two of them. He can’t bear another moment of silence with it. 
“... I don’t need a bite-rag. I don’t think I really scream much anymore.” They still had an issue with explaining context to him more, he’ll tell Dr. Gaul that needed some work lat– His jaw ticked… Why did he care about your abysmal social skills? It was a captive, it had no one to speak to other than their own captors. Pulling down their prescription from the shelf, a dark, thick liquid, he said in return: “It’s best to have it on hand, just in case you need it. Now, return back to the examination table.” For a split second, he thought he could see their gaze soften at him. Were they seriously entertaining the idea that he was being nice to them? Coriolanus just didn’t want to deal with their sounds while he worked. It’d be like trading one screaming fit for another, for when he had to go on his date with Livia later in the evening. 
They nodded, and followed his command, walking back to sit on top of it. Their body was sitting in his direction though, observing, waiting for him. Coriolanus still felt unsure about them, but… it was strange, their obedience. It made him suspicious of its intent with all this. Trailing back to the center of the examination room, he placed all the tools on a metal tray. Pulling out an exam stool from under one of the tables, he set the syringe to the cap of its prescription. He pulled the plunger of the syringe up, watching as the barrel filled up with medicine, until it sat nicely. The needle left smoothly from the cap, and a drop of the liquid dangled at the edge of it. This form of silence he liked far more better. 
“...Do you have family, Dr. Snow?” 
So close. Coriolanus flicked the needle harshly, the drop hitting somewhere else. He placed the ready syringe down, and picked up the black marker. Turning back towards them, their head rested in their palms, watching him intensely. 
“That’s none of your concern. Now please, remove your gown so we can get started on the examination.” Grabbing the stool to pull it underneath him, he got comfortable in the seat while it moved to get up. As their hands reached behind them to undo the tie around their waist first, it still spoke ( much to his chagrin ). 
“I was just wondering since Dr. Gaul usually talks whenever she comes to visit.” That explained why their throat was not as hoarse as he was expecting. Dr. Gaul was treating her trials with them as a morning brunch. “She sometimes talks about her day, or talks about her family.” They loosened the tie around their waist, the fabric more flowy around their lower body. Coriolanus stared intently, taking in the first peek of skin. Looking past the scars, despite the stitches pulling at parts of their skin, and the dented scars, their skin looked soft, malleable. They must’ve been popular on weekend nights, back then. Their hands reached up to undo the tie around their collar. Rather than watching him while he worked, it was his turn to watch them. There was that beauty mark on their left acromial. Eyes leisurely trailed back up to their fingers, the smallest note with how it fumbled around behind them to untie the flimsy string. Their movements were clumsy, in his eyes, which almost surprised him. “She likes to talk about her three kids often.”
Coriolanus looked away from their stitched fingers, confusion on his face. 
“Dr. Gaul only has two kids.” He’s seen the photos she has in her office. She has two sons, both who have gone on to have families of their own. Not once has she mentioned a third kid, Coriolanus isn’t even sure it was possible at her age. Didn’t menopause usually affect a person’s chances of getting pregnant? Maybe it was a secret child she had abandoned at the maternal ward while dropping off her resignation as an obstetrician. 
“No, she has three. She told me their names: Caius, Martius, and Coriolanus.” 
Oh. 
Oh, now that’s… 
“I see. You must be closer to Dr. Gaul than I am.” 
He didn’t know what to really say to that. There was really nothing for him to go and argue about, especially with the patient. Coriolanus couldn’t quite outright say that the third child was him, especially when he specifically told them to refer to him by his last name. And if he revealed that this was an entire lie on Dr. Gaul’s end, he wasn’t quite sure how the woman would react for doing so. It wasn’t his place, when he had no idea what Gaul had wanted to achieve. He understood the physical punishment and hypothesis being put upon Project Prometheus, but he had yet to understand where the emotional, and the mental, aspect of this punishment was. Dr. Gaul will tell him if it was needed, or he’ll figure it out based on his own conclusions. That must be one of the purposes Dr. Gaul had assigned this task to him. 
“Alright. I’m done.”
Coriolanus blinked. He didn’t even realize he lost focus on them, he let out a small exhale as he lifted himself from the exam stool, marker ready in hand. 
“Right, for the next step of this exam, I need to…” 
Words trailed off for him. 
What an entirely different view it was, from before, looking at them only from the back. From behind, it was just read to him as a large canvas of skin that had already been stained and painted on. Nothing that gave way to what person under the flesh could be. Yet, the front… There was more to regard and take note of, a far more different feeling than just having viewed from the photos alone in the reports. If he were to ignore the marks left on their body, had they stayed perfect from before, he could’ve made the argument about their body being more alluring than the average Capital citizen. That familiar, dry feeling touched his throat again. What a waste, for genes like that to be wasted on a rebel. There were more beauty marks and moles in the front, along with more stitches and scars. Coriolanus could see the surgical scars that were healing between their pectoralis major area. A curiosity rose, questioning how scarred tissue would feel under his gloves. He raised an eyebrow, as his gaze dared to move to a lower section on their body. Must be for easier mapping, that Dr. Gaul decided it was best to have their pubic area shaved clean.
“...Dr. Snow, are you okay?”
His tongue darted out to lick his dry lips under the surgical mask. 
“Fine, just thinking about Dr. Gaul’s instructions.” He was going to go insane before he could even head to the fundraiser tonight. Coriolanus reached his free hand out, hovering it over their shoulder area, guiding them to stand closer to the area between the exam table, and his stool. He took note, that despite the way their body has changed since their captivity, their body still held a warmth that radiated off from their skin. “Stand here, please. For this next step, I’ll be using this marker here to map out the different muscles and areas on your body. Are you familiar with this?”
The subject nodded, a yes from their lips. 
Good. 
The sound of the marker cap popping off filled in the lack of words on Coriolanus’s part, the black cap falling on the tiled floor and rolling off to a dark, distant corner of the room. “For today, we’ll only be focusing on the external pain chart. Meaning skin surface only,” He lifted the subject’s hair, pushing up against the subject’s head, strands that were long enough to block full access to the neck. Bringing the marker up, he pressed down the chiseled tip of alcoholic ink on the subject’s skin, making the first section of dotted lines. Writing on their skin in careful, small letters, the areas that compromised their neck; the semispinalis capitis, the levator scapulae, the rhomboid minor–
“How long have you worked for Dr. Gaul?”
Fingers nearly stumbled in drawing when the muscle stretched in movement, he lifted the marker carefully away from its skin. The idea of putting in Gaul’s suggestion box the order of a mouth gag was becoming all the more tempting to him. 
“It doesn’t concern you.” Coriolanus responded, coolly. 
He pressed the marker back down on its skin, moving himself to the anterior of its body. Between his gloved fingers, he held their chin. The muscle limp in his hands, letting him lift their chin up to show more, exposing the unfolded expanse of their skin. The project was an annoying one, but at the least,they were a pliant one. The black dotted lines drew itself across the subject’s body: the sternocleidomastoid, the sternohyoid–
“How has your day been so far, Dr. Snow?”
Would Dr. Gaul throw him to the curb if he strangled one of her projects?
Coriolanus lifted himself slightly from his leaned down angle, his fingers that once lifted its chin up, had pulled their chin back down to look at him eye to eye. Its gaze stared back at him with such emptiness, a lack of anything to be seen, no anger, no defiance, no discomfort, not even joy. His eyebrows narrowed down slightly as he took in the face that held no question to how, and what, manner he held their body in. Were they trying to please him? Make his guard drop down by asking questions, hoping that he’d become more sympathetic towards them? 
“Dr. Gaul isn’t here. You are under no requirement to attempt conversations like you’ve done with her.” He spoke, trying his best attempt at sounding sympathetic to their ears. That would be the easiest explanation. The soul of them was sucked out by Dr. Gaul forcing them into an illusion of a grotesque socialite. That’d explain away the project’s incessant speaking. 
Yet, the subject had tilted their head under his fingers. The slightest push against his grasp. 
“... Do you not like talking, Dr. Snow? Dr. Gaul always looks so happy when she’s talking.”
So they were trying to suck up to him. He locked his teeth. And to think, he was giving them a chance of redemption, by assuming that they had been conditioned to engage in meaningless conversation. Maybe he was wrong about their obedience. There was still a spark of a rebel within them regardless of their time, their experiences, in captivity. 
“I only ever see Dr. Gaul, so I got excited to see someone new. I’m sorry for upsetting you,”
They could’ve fooled him with that tone of voice. They sounded as dead as their eyes had looked. Yet, Coriolanus bit his bottom lip as the doubt touched his head; the subject’s stare, if he gazed deeply enough he felt as if he could almost make out a sullenness to them. Were they legitimately apologetic? He didn’t want to even know the answer, he just wanted to finish this job as quickly as possible. He let go of their chin, releasing it. Gloved fingers now traced the space between their shoulder and collarbone, the subject angling their neck to the other side to give him room. He brought the marker back down to their skin, more dotted lines appearing under his wake. 
“... What exactly is your relationship to Dr. Gaul, if I may ask?” He hated them, he decided. He hated how quickly they managed to rope him into this dumb small talk. It was almost audible, the sound of the subject blinking, feeling their gaze boring under the layers of his clothes. Did he say the wrong thing? Did they not want conversation? He adjusted the weight of his stance, uncomfortable under the silence the subject had unwillingly placed him in. Was he not doing what they wanted, was that not enough for them?
“Dr. Gaul is…” Their words trailed off. They were trying to find the words, unsure of what to say to him. They most likely didn’t want to try and insult her, considering her assistant was in the room with them. They don’t want to risk possibly earning more punishment. Project Prometheus may have been smarter than what he initially assumed. Coriolanus moved back to the posterior, hands trailed themselves across the subject’s shoulders, feeling, to remind him of the muscle underneath before he marked it down. Trapezius. 
“Dr. Gaul is my caretaker, I think.” 
Well isn’t that something unique. 
If the subject had decided to say captor, overseer, punisher, he wouldn’t have cared. It would’ve been honest. Caretaker? That was something different, that was something sympathetic. The thought of them turning this twisted dynamic into something heartfelt, fell sour on his tongue. It made him feel repulsion towards them. Why bother to lie? “Tell me about that.” His voice was soft, inviting the project to open themselves to him. As the marker continued to mark their skin, Coriolanus took one of its arms under his hand. The subject’s fingers twitched slightly, when he brought his hand under theirs. Their hand was not that big in comparison to his own, unable to fully fill out of his palm. The fingertips were usually the more sensitive parts, when it came to sensations. He hummed. Adductor pollicis. 
“...I’m not sure how to describe it well.” They sounded unsure. Spending this extended amount of time with them, Coriolanus could make out the slight tonal differences they had in their voice. It was very small, though. The muscles in his hands seem to slightly tense.
“Do your best for me.” 
Their fingertips, the slightly yellowed nails, tapped slightly at the latex material of his gloves. Almost as if fidgeting to gather the words, the right ones, to say to him. 
“Dr. Gaul has always been… someone there, I suppose.” Because she has to. “The guards are there too, but they don’t really notice me in the way Dr. Gaul does.” He wrote down on another part of the subject’s arm, drawing another dotted line. Brachioradialis. “Even though the tests kind of hurt, but I’m getting used to it now, she’s been the only one so far to give me a name, a birthday, check up on me, tell me about her day,” He was almost impressed at how their were trying to upsell the ‘normalcy’ of their captivity. A new name and birthday? Maybe the secret third child of Dr. Gaul wasn’t him, but actually them instead. He almost laughed aloud at the prospect of it. Coriolanus turns to the other side of their body, taking the other arm of the subject to write on after finishing the other. Biceps brachii. “That’s like a caretaker, right?” And now it was asking for his confirmation? It truly does want to appease him. He let out another hum, as if he was thinking to himself when he was going to go along with their delusions. “It sounds like Dr. Gaul cares a great deal for you.” He lied to them. 
Making his back to the anterior of the subject’s body, he stood in front of them, the subject tilting their head up to him. Project Prometheus was shorter, in comparison to him, standing at eye level against his chest. Latex touched the area of the linea alba, Coriolanus kept his gaze steady on them and they did the same. There was a silence that fell between them, but it felt so uninviting to him now that he finally had it. The subject still held their indifference, their apathy, and he wanted to know why it bothered him so much when he should like how easy of a prisoner they were being. No, there had to be something more. There was always something more. His fingers dragged down their skin, and his marker followed behind, writing down the names of the muscles he touched. The subject had moved their arms, and Coriolanus tensed for a second, thinking they were finally going to react, going to grab him, hit him, something – yet, their arms shifted away from the angle of his body, moving in to hold the muscles of the pectoralis major up in their hands, cupping them. They were making more room for him to write on their upper abdomen. 
Coriolanus loathed them. 
Had he had half the control, he would’ve smacked the stitched hands away. He liked it far more when they acted like a ragdoll, instead of this game of pacification it was trying to play. Writing down on the external oblique aponeurosis, he brought his hands back up their skin until it rested under their wrists. He held both their wrists on either hand. “Please, bring your hands down so I can continue mapping.” The words came out more as a whisper than he had intended. They instantly had listened to his command, letting their arms fall back on either side and their chest exposed to him. His eyes lingered briefly on the sight, taking in the small details that made the subject unique. The beauty mark on their left mammary gland, now in his line of sight. No longer blocked by the limit of only just a photo. There was that dry feeling in his mouth again. 
Carefully, bringing a hand up, gauging their reaction, he held one of the mammary glands in his free hand and a marker up in the other. Judging their face, they seemed neutral, no frown or smile, no wrinkle, no squint. He could assume there must have been discomfort under those dark pits for eyes. He knew that’s what he felt, doing this right now. Coriolanus wondered if it would have been better or worse, if Project Prometheus were to be more… reactionary. 
“Let me know if anything bothers you.” Dotted lines followed after his hand. He’d take it, the laborious small talk. It was much more preferred right now than this tortuous silence that had fallen between them. Thick and constricting, had it gone on any longer, Coriolanus knew he would drive himself internally insane if he was to be left alone to his own thoughts. If Project Prometheus had done nothing while he was holding onto their very own breasts in his hands. Had it been any other person, they would’ve squirmed under his touch. Possibly even a twitch to unconsciously move away, as the marker moved against the skin of the areola. The mapping of the right gland was dotted and marked completely. 
“You don’t bother me.” 
Now, that felt deliberate. 
Ink halted, stopping after writing out the final letter of the pectoralis minor. The words were written next to the beauty mark he had noted before. Coriolanus was tempted to make dotted lines around the area, as a place of special interest, though marks like these were no major muscle or nerve. Blue eyes had looked up through thick lashes, he slightly lifted his craned head up to get a better look at the subject. Peering towards their face, he didn’t know why he expected anything different. It was the same look of disinterest, the broken lights hung above them casted a haunting shadow over their face. Did he also look similar, when they stared back at him? In certain angles, despite the unnerving look the room had given them, Coriolanus might’ve thought their eyes seemed naturally soft towards him. Innocent, maybe. 
Did they see nothing wrong with what he was doing? … Or had all the tests and operations ruined not just their nerves, but fried them, that their sense of danger seemed near non-existent? 
Was this another form of appeasement that it was trying to pull on him? 
Unconsciously, his hands had released themselves, finally, from holding onto Project’s Prometheus’s breasts. Both now marked, his free hand slid down the expanse of their abdomen. The ridges and bumps of their scars and stitches were felt briefly, the full grasp of the sensation blocked by the barrier of latex rubber wrapped around his fingers. Not once did he look away from the subject as his hands made its way down, and neither did Project Prometheus. His hand stopped at the tensor fasciae latae. Something was wrapping itself around the cavity of his chest, making the activity of breathing a difficult feat for him to do. Coriolanus didn’t know what he was doing. Was he trying to garner a bigger reaction from it? An attempt of possibly stirring violence, even? 
Maybe it was delaying his own discomfort, he realized. Looking down, he stared to see the spread of skin below that had no splotches of black ink. They were shorter than him, he’d have to get down on his knees if he wanted to have clear and easy access to mark its legs. How humiliating… Having risen up through the ranks and bringing the Snow family back to its rightful place of acclaim and fortune; only to fall back down on his knees to a prisoner, a former rebel. If the other families caught wind of this, he’d never hear the end of it. 
Reluctantly, still holding onto their hip, his body moved itself to the floor. Knees touched against the uneven grout of the tiles, the position a bit awkward. He was thankful, for the surgical gown he wore, that the vile floor of the examination room wouldn’t stain against his clothes. Tracing his hand down to the stitch mark path of their leg, he rested it at the back of their thigh. Coriolanus tilted his head up, ready to command that Project Prometheus moved their leg more towards him. But, his words fell into a silent, held breath as he gazed up at them from his position. The shadow that had cascaded over their face briefly from before was now entirely enveloped around their body. Sickly green fluorescent lights shone above their head, akin to a haloing effect. Illuminated around the edges of their body, their hair, the subject still looking at him. Only him, and nothing else. A thrumming noise was loud in his ears; it felt dangerous. It felt like a warning that something was wrong here. He had felt it before.
Project Prometheus moved its leg forward, more into him, without a word ever spoken between the two of them. How pliant it was with him. 
He pressed the marker against their skin as thank you, dipping his head back down to their thigh. It would be risky, if he lost focus. There was still so much he had yet to know of the subject, the layers that were contained behind the flimsy shield of flesh and tissue. He dotted the area of the vastus medialis, careful not to press the ink against the subject’s stitches so as not to irritate the healing skin there. Maybe its attempts of appeasement were working on him. Not once did he think he’d have a shred of enough care to think about the possibility of ink seeping into their wounds. 
He marked down the region of the knee. Patella. 
“...You’re a very gentle person, Dr. Snow.” The subject spoke quietly, in a whisper just loud for him to hear. “You treat me so carefully, I barely feel a thing when you hold me.” 
It mistook his lightweight hands for kindness. Reality was that he was just wary about setting them off. 
“Does Dr. Gaul not treat you in the same manner?” The words came out softly from him. Reaching now the ankle of the subject, gloved hands reached down underneath the sole of its foot, lifting it up for better writing access. Instinctively, Project Prometheus placed their hands on either side of his shoulders so as to not fall. Their body leaned itself more into him, using him as a steady weight of support. The proximity of their small body bent over his, the glare of the fluorescent lights was entirely swallowed up, casting a dark shadow over him, blocking the light from reaching him. Could they feel, under their ragged fingers, the tenseness in his body at their action? If the subject wanted to, they could easily go in to attack him in this vulnerable position. He’d do the same if he was in their position. He continued to write, marker steady in hand. There would be no satisfaction to be gained for the subject, in seeing him stumble and cower. 
He wrote the words ‘abductor hallucis’ on their foot.
“She… does not treat me rough, no. If I had to describe it, I think the word for it is more… ‘inanimate’.” He doesn’t quite recall if a new law was passed that required captors to treat prisoners humanely. It sounded as if it was trying to recall certain words again. Should the exam go entirely smoothly with no problems, he might feel generous enough to convince Dr. Gaul to bring Project Prometheus a dictionary for them to study up on. Not like it would do much. It wasn’t like they had anyone to really practice their knowledge on. 
Coriolanus wondered what the prisoner was exactly before all this, back when they were formerly Capital. They lacked the air of dignity and ignorance that most Capital elites donned well, but maybe that could be attributed to their decay while staying here. Or perhaps the prisoner had come from a small, simple family. The kind that handled all the manual labor that the Capital never liked to speak loud about. The workers who were hardly ever seen, or acknowledged. That could explain why he never heard any recent fuss over a family’s child being ‘sent away’. No one would ever care for a background prop. 
It held onto his shoulders more tightly, as he adjusted the subject’s position. It didn’t want to topple over him. 
Project Prometheus's right foot now marked accordingly, he placed its foot back down on the rotten floor. Ready to reach his hand to hold onto their left, the subject moved without the need for his touch. The left leg was gestured forward for him. How sweet of them to realize a pattern. “I don’t mind it, though. As long as she still talked to me.” How fascinating. The subject was pacified by the easy act of conversation. Such a simple thing to be pleased by, Coriolanus could think they were joking. Regardless of how things were going so far, he still didn’t forget it. The bloodstains on the halls was something he could not erase so easily. That suggested, no, it told him, that Project Prometheus had something up their sleeve still. Though, nothing had occurred. Nothing had happened because they were still speaking to each other. Coriolanus continued to write on its foot. Lumbrical.
“...Do you get upset if she doesn’t speak to you?” 
He couldn’t help but ask. 
He wanted to know. He needed to know. 
“...I get lonely, and sad.” Was it trying to downplay its emotional reactions to him? “I wonder if it's because I did something wrong to upset her.” If a prisoner of his tried to fight back numerous times during their captivity, he’d get annoyed too. It was strange, though. Coriolanus knew that morals and values were of no concern for Dr. Gaul, especially against rebels. Any torture, punishment, placed on them was not seen as being done onto another person, but just another animal, a specimen in her collection. It would not be above Dr. Gaul to cut off a limb, or two, to get a prisoner to stop fighting. So… why not do the same here? Perhaps, this form of mental and emotional punishment was more lethal than he assumed. Another curious test from the mad woman, it was impossible to ever understand her whims. 
“Sometimes, I think it might be one of her tests.”
Coriolanus didn’t say those words. 
He didn’t like this. Such a statement, spoken so simply, brought him a sick swirl of unease. 
The movement of ink had halted, yet his mind continued to race. The thin hairs at the back of his neck stood at its ends, and he held tightly onto the marker in his hand. Quietly, carefully, he placed the plantar surface of Project Prometheus’s foot back down on the uneven tiles below the both of them. Reaching his hands up to his shoulders, where the subject’s extensor retinaculum were, he held onto it firmly. The subject put up no sign of objection. Sweat was slowly building up under the tight material of the gloves he donned on, but it was not a sweltering warmth. It was a cold, clammy sensation. 
“What do you mean by ‘one of her tests’?” Punctuating the words at the end, he kept his tone inquisitive, curious. Perhaps, a dabble of suspicion. Not towards the subject, but more towards the matter. What was needed in this situation was caution, and he’d be a gutted fool if he was to let the rebel become aware of how much the question startled him to his core. For right now, he’d play the gentle, confused assistant that it assumed of him before. He already told the lie of it knowing Dr. Gaul better than he did. 
“Her tests,” 
It spoke as if he knew! He knew very well what it was. What once was a flash of fear, had become a steady stream of anger. He knew because he is Dr. Gaul’s assistant. It was his job to follow in the steps she’s placed out for him, and more. Why would a prisoner, a subject, know about the ways Dr. Gaul operated? How much does Dr. Gaul tell it in these ‘conversations’? 
It made him sick, that the lie he told before could actually become true. 
“I never notice it until it’s done, until she tells me at the end. She never shares the results with me.” For once, he is tempted to strip his pride and beg for more details. “Most days, it’ll be physical tests, like today. Others, it’s more… talking, or writing.” 
“Writing?” 
It came out quickly before he could properly think his words over. He doesn’t recall seeing possible writing exams in Subject A01’s report. To be fair to himself, he did skim it briefly since he was only just now introduced to the project. There wasn’t much time for him to familiarize himself with all the tiny details written inside. At least, the things that were legible. 
“Dr. Gaul hands me scraps of paper and just asks me to write what I think. Like uh, a journal…I guess.” Keeping a diary couldn’t be the only test Dr. Gaul was having it do. If writing random streams of thought was enough to be intellectually challenging, he wouldn’t be seeing students at the University fighting to win passing grades. “I don’t understand the reason why, and I never remember what I write. My memory is not the best.” It was giving him an excuse to try and shift the conversation. How funny it was, trying to take control of the situation. He’d never let such a thing happen. In this examination room, there was only one person and a subject, the dynamic that was at play was clear. The grip Coriolanus had on their extensor retinaculum tightened, an unconscious movement on his part. Project Prometheus had taken in a soft breath of air at the action, the sound loud enough between the both of them. Had it not come from a prisoner, what a sweet sound it could’ve been. 
“Could you explain it to me,” His voice came out softly, despite the gnawing irritation that he held back. The tight grasp he had loosened, one hand stroking down a careful thumb down the stitched wrist of the subject in gentle circles. He shifted in his kneeled position, adjusting to a more comfortable weight as the layers he wore started to wear at him, an uncomfortable shift. Wearing the surgical uniform could be sweltering. Tilting his head up slightly to gaze up at the subject, praying that his eyes did not betray and reveal his inner thoughts. “Try to remember.” 
Coriolanus could’ve sworn he saw a slight falter, a tremble, in the dark optics of Project Prometheus. Its supercilium furrowed just the slightest inch upwards; did it look apologetic? The first visible change of expression he’s witnessed in the time he’s spent here in this examination room, and it’s one of regret. The subject’s fingers twisted itself into the fabric of his surgical gown, opening its mouth partially as they sought the right sound, the right word. He could make out the faint peeks of its canines. 
“... I’m sorry, Dr. Snow. I can’t remember at all,” They breathed out, in admission, surrendering. It treated it as a guilty confession. 
“Not a thing?” He whispered softly to them, prompting them to speak more. Coriolanus applauded himself internally, for how sympathetic he sounded. 
The subject shook its head. 
“My memory is not good.” Again, it reaffirmed its previous statement. 
Was his question that hard? Surely, specks of small details, flashes of imagery, that would be sufficient enough of an answer for him. He wasn’t asking for a full essay of their inner workings ( though, he wouldn’t mind it ). However, as both their eyes continued locked in a stare, his thumb slowed its movements. The leathered finger stopping at the center junction of its stitches, the feel of the raised, textured skin apparent under the feel of the material. Project Prometheus was being sincere. Its face hadn’t changed, its body had not moved away from him. Dare he say, the minimal space between them; something he did not mind earlier before, had become much more apparent in his feverish mind. The subject answered him so honestly, it made his suspicions of before seem so ridiculous now. One thing did nag at him though, the writing, the insistence of journaling, the memory. 
“... Do you remember how long you’ve been here?” Two years ago, Coriolanus recalled. Two years ago, that was when he was abandoned in District 12. When Dr. Gaul had started the experiment on Subject A01, busying herself with curiosities while he was drowning himself in depravities and vices, waiting out like a dog for some form of mercy to reach him. 
A new, tense silence consumed them both. He watched the subject carefully, taking note of the slightest movement that could give any indication of anything more. Tracing with his eyes, following how Project Prometheus’s cuspid snagged at their chapped bottom lip. A faint flush of red spread across the muscle, from the pressure exerted on it. Unconsciously, it reminded him of how dry his own mouth felt, the hoarse sensation in his throat. He darted out his own tongue for a brief moment to wet his own mouth, hidden underneath the surgical mask he wore. Nothing was being said between them, but yet there was so much being told. A fierce feeling was soaring, running through the veins of Coriolanus; he knew what it meant and he feared for it. Not for what the answer could be, but what it possibly could bring up. 
“You don’t remember how you got it here at all, do you?” His voice was so hushed, spoken as if taboo. It gave him the same feeling of it, the rush as the blood was entering his head and his heartbeat loud in his ears. 
A form of dissociative amnesia. 
Project Prometheus had developed gaps in memory due to an extended amount of isolation and exposure to severe trauma. It all clicked in Coriolanus’s head. He understood now what Dr. Gaul was attempting to achieve in her games with the subject. The tests, the daily conversations, the journal writing – Dr. Gaul was examining the subject’s mental decay as part of the Project’s ongoing research. Not only has the woman deteriorated and changed the way the prisoner’s nerves had worked, but their mind as well. Is continuing the Project even viable to do anymore? It was a form of punishment. Would it be ethical to operate on a being of flesh, when the subject no longer knew what it was being punished for? The question would most likely give Dr. Gaul a kick of joy. She loved to ponder questions worthy of debate. Coriolanus wouldn’t put it past the woman if she already gave the inquiry out to one of her classes in a lecture hall. 
“I vaguely do,” 
His eyebrows rose in interest. 
“But only in subtle feelings.” 
Nevermind. 
“I think I experienced some form of confusion. And bits of anger, too. Dr. Gaul… For a moment, I used to be so scared of her. Now, I can’t even remember the reason why.” 
Project Prometheus’s indifference, Coriolanus realized, it was not just solely based on apathy. What had become of it was a blank state, unsure of how to process things so the mind refused to process it all. But, it was still something highly susceptible to influences, shown in how Project Prometheus had become conditioned like Pavolv Dog, to associate Dr. Gaul’s silence with anger and disappointment, and her socialness with satisfaction and joy. It all was dawning on him. He could see it now, why Dr. Gaul was so disturbingly fascinated by this project. Gloved hands moved away from the subject’s wrist, and reached out to lay in gentle manner against the side of their bare thighs. The subject allowed him to, never raising a sign of objection. Could he teach it to experience anger once more, when he treated their body like this? Maybe discomfort, disgust, despair - he wanted to show their blank canvas of a mind what it felt like to fully immerse themselves in these ugly emotions. He knew why they were like this, but there still was a lingering crumb of vexation directed at the subject. Somehow, in their newfound state, they still felt far more free than he ever did; how they almost felt nothing, and he had to feel everything. 
And yet, there was another thought that touched him. He wondered, if he spent enough time with the subject, could he too, be able to condition them to other things. They thought of him as merciful, kind, in comparison to Dr. Gaul. Could he make Project Prometheus worship him, and in the same quiet breaths they were fond of, resent him? The thought of making them accustomed to anticipating his attendance, and lamenting his absence sounded tempting. 
How nice it would be, to have someone other than a deranged crone enjoy his presence. 
Tigris certainly didn’t anymore. 
Coriolanus rose himself from the ground, gripping on the meat of Project’s Prometheus’s flesh to lift him. Under his touch, the pliant stretch of skin and tissue made the subject remove their hands from his shoulders. Another faint breath escaped their exhale. It was a sound he was slowly getting used to. Back to their original height difference, he no longer had to crane his head up to look at the subject. The subject had to lift their head up to look up at him, now. What did Project Prometheus see, in their gaze as they stared at him, Coriolanus thought. Was he too, consumed in shadow and bathed under the gritty lights of the examination room like they once had? 
“We’re done with the mark-up.” It took him a moment to move away from the subject. “We’ll move to holding the nerve exam now, after I administer a low dosage of your medication.” 
The uncapped, black marker was placed back down on the metal tray, aside from the examination table. Replacing its empty space was now the syringe he had filled out before, the dark color swishing as he picked it up. The needle gleamed under the fluorescent light. Turning his back around, Project Prometheus had already sat themselves up nicely on the edge of the examination table for him. Their legs dangled off, their hands held at the edges of the worn-out leather cushion, eyes fixated on his person. They were waiting for him. He’s almost bothered, how easily the subject could anticipate his next set of commands. He hoped that this was just due to routine, not because he had become easy to read. Coming up to meet them there, the only sound that filled the air was the sole of his shoes stepping against the tiles. Gloved fingers reached to grab at the jaw of Project Prometheus, the syringe held close to their face. It shone particularly brilliant, mere inches away from their face. The subject showed him no fear, no resistance, despite the way the skin of the cheeks had moved under his grasp. 
Already, he wanted to break them.
“Show me where to inject you.” 
He’d be sweet, Coriolanus would let them pick where it was most comfortable for him to inject the medication in. Project Prometheus complied immediately to him, holding on the hand that held their needle to adjust the position. They guided him to the back of their neck, moving their hair to make space. To reward their compliance, he pricked the syringe quickly under the skin, careful not to touch an artery or nerve. The dark liquid inside the barrel slowly filled out, emptying itself as he pushed the plunger down. The subject did not let out a sound, a favorable contrast to Livia, who waited for him outside these Citadel walls. 
He was going to mold them into something useful.
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solarspiriit · 29 days
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Guys somethings wrong with my game…
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Non glasses version because I’m still between on if I want detective prince Hugo to wear contacts or stick with his glasses…
All I know is he definitely wears glasses during the 3rd sem ❤️
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pharawee · 10 days
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—DEEP NIGHT THE SERIES · Episode 6
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HOW IS THE SHOW WITH MOST PORN WITH PLOT POTENTIAL ONE OF THE BEST SHOWS EVER??
Dude Deep Night has always been a journey about family, acceptance and love. Love towards others, live towards yourself, but THIS EPISODE.. it was just so beautiful. I think it might be a 10/10 seriously...
Just look
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See how far Khemtid has come as a character and as a person.. he went from being selfish and angry and jealous to crying our of EMPATHY for his boyfriends pain.
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To crying because he's worked to hard to get the club his mom loves so much back on track. This man cries because he's now feeling feelings in a much healthier way.
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And the throuple??? Not a kink thing??? But actual poly??? They're introducing this topic so carefully, it's developed so naturally... The looks, the enemies to helping each other, to these looks.. to feeling he's part of it as well and being concerned about it. He's part of their dynamic but they don't know how to put that into something real. Fuck when I tell you I felt so sad in these moments, because all three of them hurt.
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Also... Talking about age???? And how you're still allowed to love like a teen???? And that's valid???? The phrase she says cut me deep broool
"In all of that, there's no me"
Freya will have to learn to accept herself, because love is a vulnerable thing and she's supposed to be strong and a mother and a boss and a leader.. but what about the one she leans on when she's tired???
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And the way Khemtid just kNOWS
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We're also getting the quiet love, the hand holding, the hair brushing, the every day love. We have been losing that, and I'm so glad they're showing it.
He'll do ANYTHING for Wela.
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FUCK THERES SO MUCH I ALSO WANT TO TALK ABOUT
The way it's directed is masterful at creating tension and excitement and confusion and the rush of adrenaline when you like someone but you're too damn scared...
The third couple... "If you don't tell me, I won't know"
It's slow
It's good
I feel in love just watching it
I feel sad
I feel joy
I feel..
I feel.
This is what shows are supposed to be.
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lunar-years · 1 month
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S1 Keeley with a boyfriend she genuinely likes and has fun with (the first one in ages) and is maybe even starting to love, even though she hadn’t ever planned on falling in love with him, and this was only supposed to be PR, right (probably), and he isn’t even the right material for a longterm thing anyway (unless he could be?) only for him to go and break their carefully woven trust and demonstrate that he really is more the arsehole everyone else keeps telling her he is, rather than the person he's been to her (the one who, sure, has an ego through the roof, but who's also funny and kind and ambitious and brave) in one fell swoop. To have to wonder if she’s been blind this whole time to who he really is, and to be made to feel like a total idiot because of how he treated her, and then to decide firmly that no, he is good and he is trying, and then to make the choice to continue to be there for him and help him when he asks...
Late S1/S2 Keeley with a different boyfriend, and this one she's certain she loves, and he could most definitely be longterm material with only a little polishing, in fact she's pretty sure this is it, and she's going to see this man through to his shine, because he's worth it. Even as he spirals in retirement and even as they hurt each other in small ways that eventually start to add up into something bigger, she keeps believing things will get better and they both will do better, because the little life they've been building is worth it. Or it has been, up until he goes and breaks up with her and doesn't even give her the courtesy of presenting something passable as a reason, even as he's turned into a stranger before he's fully out the door. And then they're barely talking and she's heartbroken and she knows she probably went wrong somewhere in there, too, but he never told her how and she's too tired to pick apart all the whys, and she's mad at him but it's difficult to even hold space for that anger because she misses him....
S3 Keeley Jones who stumbles into another new thing, and it's not going to be anything serious (unless it could be), and she's still grieving the last one (maybe the last two?) (but this will be different, really) and Rebecca's telling her she isn't certain this is a good thing (but Rebecca never liked Jamie, either, and Jamie's turned out all right, hasn't he). Her new girlfriend flying her on extravagant dates and flooding her with extravagant gifts and making Keeley feel appreciated, like all the time she's put in is finally being recognized, makes her feel worthy of love (she only wants to be loved. she wants people to stop leaving.) Even as her new girlfriend announces their relationship to the entire office (and sure, it's a little sticky, being that her girlfriend is also her boss, and it makes Keeley feel a little uncomfortable, actually, having all those eyes on her, her employees, but she pushes it aside because Jack isn't afraid to acknowledge her, to make it known that she likes her, to stick with her, and that's something). It's something until it isn't, anyway. Until she only acknowledges Keeley where she wants to, to the people she wants to. Until she leaves, too, and takes Keeley's funding with her. And then Keeley is left to feel like the clueless one again, the idiot for not spotting it coming all along.
And she's making stupid decisions again (sleeping with exes just to get the chance to feel someone), and Jamie and Roy are weirdly close now, and isn't that just flipping great. somehow she missed that, too. And she's the one who made them both better!! they never would have turned out like this if she hadn't been pushing them towards it all along, and now they're there without her, which really doesn't seem fucking fair and definitely sucks. And she's maybe still a little (a lot) in love with both of them, but then they're demanding she choose between them like quarreling stupid schoolboys, and she doesn't even want to choose and she wants both of them at the same time she wants neither of them and then there's still the sticky business of rebuilding her firm with what Jack did still sitting so raw in her chest (and it was never that serious anyway, so why does it bother her so much? why does everything bother her so much?)
(im gnawing at my enclosure)
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shirozora-draws · 2 months
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Leap Year Day update, because I thought that would be a neat date to have on this fic.
Very extremely recommend reading the chapter before looking at the art.
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Tmw you finally fulfill your years' old desire to paint some fucking fantasy deer.
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I sketched the original idea for this scene and posted it a whiiiiiiiile back, and now that idea is part of the story.
Now that the chapter is out, I can get back to finalizing the final pop-up shop stuff and, uh, stopping neglecting the hella expensive figure invention for character animation I'm taking for the spring semester.
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aleksanderscult · 6 months
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I just realized that Alina and the Darkling comforted each other in his last moments. Alina held his hand and assured him that she would honor his request to burn his body.
I swear if I see one more anti say that she didn't love him I'm gonna lose it here 🙃
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prince-liest · 1 month
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oh my god…. prince……. you can’t do this to me. you’re saying next fic has vox getting fucked, focuses on vox’s transness (AH), AND ALSO HES ON THE OFF SEE SAW OF HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH VAL?????? ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL MEE?!!?!!????? I THINK I MIGHT ACTUALLY COMBUST. and bc another anon asked abt how alastor views the violence in voxval’s relationship, i have Another thought on the matter. as much as alastor looks down on vox, they can be Very similar sometimes. they are both egomaniacs and very prideful. i don’t think vox, without outside interference, would ever ADMIT that the violence he faces is 1) something he truly hates AND 2) out of his control. he can’t admit he hates it, because then why isn’t he stopping it? that would be admitting to not being powerful enough or strong enough. and hello, 50’s toxic masculinity coming through, he CANT be a victim of domestic violence. he’s a powerful, rich, and important man. it all comes down to perceived weakness. so, the solution is to pretend he’s mostly fine with it. sure, he can act disgruntled and upset in the moment, but i don’t think he’d ever let himself take it seriously. because then he has to start drawing lines in the sand, and what happens then? will val look down on him? will he lose val? yeah, he is not risking that over a problem he mostly refuses to acknowledge exists. and as you said, this is all happening in the setting of hell, where ultra violence IS the norm, and vox himself is excessively violent. it’s the most delicious 50 layer cake of fucked up-ness.
RANT ASIDE THO. i have a question. 2. do you ever plan on having vox interact with the hotel crew outside of angel? ANDDDD what would charlie’s reaction be to their friendship/situationship/ kinda love affair. i think she could add SOOOOO much hilarity and Intense Emotions to this series. not that the boys haven’t been doing their part in that so far. charlie just intensifies everything she does, god bless her. -🌓
The "getting fucked" bit and the trans conversation bit are directly related to and relevant to each other, and frankly I'm just very happy to be out here writing the specific flavors of deeply queer shenanigans that I'm writing, and to have people actively enjoy that. It genuinely means a lot to me that I've strayed so goddamn far out of the bounds of good old top/bottom yaoi archetypes that introduced me to fandom and yet have a wildly enthusiastic audience nonetheless. So, that was my long way of saying that you bring me a lot of fucking joy, anon, hahaha.
As for everything you're saying about Vox, power, and masculinity: YOU! points dramatically at you YOU GET IT! YOU GET IT!!!!!! Everyone just read this, this is it, this is the thing. I have no notes to add. There is a reason that the main point he raises the moment he actually says something vulnerable about it (before he immediately cuts himself off) is a complaint that he's an overlord, so why—?
And with regards to your questions: I'm not gonna lie, my actual planning for 666 is usually, like, extremely by the seat of my pants. I plan nothing except, "Oh, shit, had an idea for the next one. Lesgoooo—" and that's been the case for literally every single installment. It's all just been evolving naturally and building on top of itself. So! I can't say that I plan to have Vox interact with the hotel crew or Charlie, but I also will never say that I'm actively opposed to it.
That said, I do think a lot of this fic is kinda structured around hitting specific topics that come up in intimate settings between Vox and Alastor specifically, with occasional tag-ins from Angel Dust, so I don't really know if there's anything in particular I'd like to write that I think would work better in this series if more characters got involved. But, hey! Never say never!
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luckyraeve · 1 year
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Headcannon time, but maybe a real thing???
Leon has an animation in RE4R where he massages his right shoulder for a moment, and it happens often enough that it caught my attention. So, could this be chronic pain due to an injury from the Raccoon City incident?
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At first I thought it might be from when Annette Birkin shot him, but that's his left shoulder, not his right.
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I also thought it could be soreness radiating down to his shoulder from being injected in the neck early on in RE4R, but i rewatched Chapter 1 of a playthru and the first time he rubs his shoulder happens before the injection cutscene.
So then... is Leon's aching right shoulder possibly from holding on to Ada before she fell to her "death" in RE2R???
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Because if yes, then that is a cool continuity detail to include in RE4R.
Leon's aching right shoulder foreshadowing the return of Ada Wong.
Ada Wong being a literal permanent sore spot in Leon's life.
(it could also be something as completely mundane as Leon is right handed so he holds tension in that shoulder from firing guns, and stabbing everything all the time, but shhhhhhh! let's pretend it's not that)
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laesas · 1 year
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The hands holding yours are not clean either.
VegasPete + Hands || KinnPorsche (2022)
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hawkp · 4 months
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Kind of peeved that Julian hasn’t gotten a ‘rage quit’ episode. Sure he got to yell at his parents about the genetic modifications, but between Sloan, Sisko ordering him to prepare that gel stuff for transport, and a LOT of stuff in between, I think he deserves to have a little freak out.
Bro deserves to obliterate the infirmary with his bare hands, homie deserves to scream at all of the senior officers in the Ward room and then dissolve into Miles arms. This might be projecting
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fracturediron · 2 months
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Honestly, if the Prathipsit family trend of misfortune is anything to go by, I really don't think New's getting out of this alive or happy. He'll probably either die in the pursuit of revenge because he doesn't feel like he's got anything else to live for, or to save Non/help Phee save Non if Non turns out to be alive.
Or if he does get out of this alive, he'll be a broken shell of a person, because nothing good ever happens for the Prathipsits.
Although New and Phee started this whole thing to just try and scare the other boys in the hopes they might find out what happened to Non, I think the difference between Phee and New is that Phee doesn't want to do any actual harm to them, while New, well. I still don't think New set out to seriously harm anyone either to begin with, but this is a man whose family has been utterly destroyed and whose life is in ruins. He's lost everything, and as far as he's concerned, these boys had something to do with it.
If that smile at the end of ep 9 was anything to go by, although he may not have gone into this with the intent to cause this level of harm, now that it's happened and everything's going to shit, I don't think he minds that it's happened either (whereas I think Phee will when he gets back). To New, these assholes are the cause of his whole family's suffering. So honestly, don't they deserve some suffering, too?
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On a different note, as it really does seem that Phee and New went in just trying to investigate - and not actually do a whole murder revenge plot - surely that means they can't have been the ones to set up the spike trap to impale Por? If the point was just investigation, I can't believe they would, because the only purpose of a trap like that is to seriously injure somebody.
Which again, seems to confirm that there is an actual additional person stalking them and actually hoping to kill the OG group. As such, I really hope we get a flashback to the boys first arriving at the house, only this time from Phee and New's POV as they set their plan in motion and then talk between themselves about WTF is happening as they realise somebody else is actually out there and out to kill them.
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