#or put me in the show her choice

[nonasuch]

question for my fellow film & tv costume enthusiasts: what show or movie do you love even though the costuming is hot garbage?

I’ll start, because mine is not a period piece but in fact Buffy the Vampire Slayer, a show I will love forever despite regularly putting actors into the worst fucking outfits imaginable.

#this post brought to you by those fucking backless shirts they kept putting on buffy & anya in season 4 #and also everything willow wore after s3 full stop #like her s3 outfits were also bad but they were believable as bad choices willow would make for herself #past that point? no excuse #also did they have a special box labeled ‘Drab Shapeless Sweaters To Hide Anthony Stewart Head From The Female Gaze’ or what #extremely timely commentary due to me thinking about s4 and getting mad again 20 literal years later #buffy the vampire slayer #btvs #my forever show #despite their outfits

[witchofthemidlands]

Ingrid Dracula's Evil Reflection (Made Me A Lesbian)

YOUNG DRACULA (2006-2014) || (2x10) Sweet Sixteen

#INGRID 😍 #not to be a lesbian but oh my god #my mother was having words with me about her various ✨opinions✨ on my ✨life choices✨ and honestly #mother if you were not expecting me to become a lesbian you should not have put this show on for me as a child #ingrid dracula #young dracula #clare thomas #youngdraculaedit #cinemapix #dailytvwomen #dracula #vampires

[comixandco]

my favourite part of season 5 is still the reveal that Gabriel and Tomoe thought Adrien and Kagami made the perfect pair and wanted them to be together because it completely flips their relationship

Kagami and Adrien sneaking around and finding the slightest gaps in their schedule and giving their bodyguards/parents the slip to spend time together and feeling so clever that they’ve gotten away with it their parents don’t suspect a thing

only to smashcut to Gabriel and Tomoe doing an evil pound it because their ship is canon

#miraculous ladybug #ml s5 #gabriel agreste #tomoe tsurugi #adrien agreste #kagami tsurugi #it’s the illusion of free choice™ #it was a very clever plan tbf like if they told them to date it would be awkward and forced. but put them in the same room together and see #what happens… let them think it was all their idea… boom success! #then the next step is saying ‘yes i only just found out you’ve been dating kagami and i have decided to give you my permission to date her- #what do you mean you broke up a month ago and your dating the baker girl who made a hat for me one time?’ #on the flipside though it probably wouldn’t have worked out in the long run bc kagami likes the thrill of a secret forbidden romance like #that’s partially what drove her to felix imo so if tomoe said one day ‘it’s come to my attention you’re dating the agreste boy. i approve o #of this match and have organised a date for you two on friday.’ you Know kagami would immediately go #‘oh no.. okay um so now i’m kind of feeling that everything about him that was attractive to me before isn’t really there anymore…’ #also on the flipside like looking at it on a more deeper/serious level like it just goes to show how much control tomoe and gabriel have o #er their kids to the point that they would be willing to manipulate them into a relationship and then when #the two of them tried and realised it wasn’t working. instead of admitting they don’t know their children as well as they think they do #or acknowledging that their children are actual people who have their own feelings that don’t always match their parents #or coming to terms that their children aren’t extensions of their legacy and will that they can puppet however they want #instead they say ‘okay we tried the hands off way now we’ll just have to force them’

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

why does everything have to be a hecking issue with my sister

#she keeps getting on my case about the Theatre Boy thing which I would just like to hecking leave in the past #she keeps getting on my case bc I wear short shorts and spaghetti strap tank tops AROUND THE HOUSE AS LOUNGE CLOTHES #she's like DO YOU EVEN CARE ABOUT MODESTY and I'm like YOU WALK AROUND IN SHORTS AND A SPORTS BRA ALL THE TIME #(possibly bc I thought I could get away with wearing lounge clothes with a long shawl thing overtop the other day to worship practice #but I did in fact change my trousers after my mama pointed out that it wasn't super modest) #she keeps making comments about how I do inappropriate stuff on my phone bc I... watch one(1) sitcom????? #shows like that are IRREVERENT AS HECK like come on of course I'm not going to be totally open with my kid sister about them #I am an ADULT I can make my own choices about what content I will put up with in media #I can make my own choices about clothing if I think my mom's idea of ''anything more than an inch above the knee #is immodest'' is silly and restrictive for my body shape and comfort level personally #like... why does she have to act so high and mighty around me? she's in MIDDLE SCHOOL and I know I haven't always been the nicest to her #but I'm making the effort. I'm trying to get along with her and what I get is disdain on the daily in return :/ #our mom said it's probably bc she was hoping I wouldn't move back in so she'd have our room to herself and now she's mad #that I'm back bc she has to share a space again and like I KNOW middle school ages SUCK I've BEEN THERE #but still I just. want to get along. but she picks on me and then I get frustrated and then I snap at her and it just doesn't end well #it's a nasty cycle tbh. I'm praying about it. #Lu rambles #personal #delete later

[lisbonsteresa]

i'm going to SCREAM

#tm #you don't get how UNHINGED this makes me it's SO #like he's been out all day trying to track down this missing kid (as part of her case too; to give her another avenue against volker) #and they have their little catch up and at first he's concerned (she's been at this all day and now into the night too #and he GETS it - in a way maybe other people wouldn't - but he doesn't want her to burn herself out; he wants her to be careful #maybe he's about to tell her a version of 'get some sleep') #but then she talks about amanda and it makes me NUTS because she does NOT ask for his help #she doesn't ask him to stay; to read the files with her; to 'burn the midnight oil' with her #she's just...stating her case; explaining why this means so much to her; and he listens; he takes it in; and he makes the choice to help #to sit in this with her and to help her work through it #and i just -- neither of them will ask the other for help (yes i know she did at the end of the last episode the context is different ok) #but they're both so quietly (and sometimes not so quietly) desperate to help each other it makes me sick #it's so interesting to see how they deal with this as the show goes on....idk how to explain it but like #when jane needs help he closes himself off; he keeps secrets and he schemes and he lies ('let me help you' 'you're sweet') #because he's trying to keep the people he cares about - the people he never planned on caring about as much as he does - safe #even as he shares more with lisbon (and sometimes the rest of the team) he still doesn't share everything #because that puts them at risk #and that's what lisbon used to do to - in the earlier seasons she put up walls when she felt vulnerable; and she still does in some cases #but with this case especially she's much more accepting of help - she relies on her team (not that she doesn't usually) #and she's practically an open book to jane - in this scene most of all - she lets herself be more vulnerable #(and open to suggestions/ideas she might otherwise scoff at or reject) #idk idk it's very interesting but this scene makes me so wacky there's something so soft and tender and understanding about it #the way there's no spoken acknowledgement - no 'i'll help' or 'thank you' - just the silent understanding that they're in this together #because they're partners #(also the way he picks at the rest of her food - the 'done with this?' the only thing they say - and the framing through the window #is still somehow very domestic it's like my perfect scene) #spinning my wheels hard i'm not thinking clearly i just love everything about it

[throttlegainwell]

I've got a little bit of that Joyce future pdwm fic written (to follow up on Iconoclast), and ngl, it is very much sadder and more upsetting than pretty much all of Jonathan's stuff in pdwm. Not in, like, a grossly exploitative or overwrought way, I hope. Just that I gave her some pretty heavy shit to sort out, and I want to give her room to explore that properly, so she's in a very sad situation because I've got this dual narrative (past & present) + an epistolary component going on. (I know, I'm overly complicating this, but trust me, it makes sense in context.)

There's a lot of good stuff, too! She's actually in a pretty good place in the future narrative, and even the heavy parts of it aren't, like... overwhelmingly so, I hope? She's working toward good stuff.

But yeah.

#writing tag #please don't wake me series #holding incandescent light pdwm #i needed to show what she had going on #and i wanted to show the maneuvering she did and coping strategies she used just like i did for jonathan #since i've given them pretty clear parallels in this series #but while jonathan's maneuvering and coping are a little sad but mostly understandable and not terrible #joyce's are extremely sad because she's actively navigating an ongoing abuse situation & trying to avoid further misery #her choices are not great but she chooses the ones she hates less every time #and mostly she's just trying not to be home as much as possible #all of which puts her in a really shitty and vulnerable position #i'm still trying to decide how much lonnie needs to be in the past narrative

[tiny012]

I still don't understand the obsession with Seiya. Let's just think about this situation from Usagi's perspective. Your fiance has gone to another country for school while you remain in your own country where you're just trying to get through school while something inside is telling you something is very wrong with your fiance because he's not calling. However, as if this isn't bad enough, some popular guy starts stalking you and insisting on being in a relationship with you although you already mentioned more than once you have a boyfriend, you have tried to let them off gently, but they can't seem to take the hint. To add more salt to the wound, your friends are encouraging this behavior and gaslighting you into playing along just so they can get with the guy themselves, which leads to you being humiliated and bullied. All the while, you still worry about your fiance and having the other guy continually insult him and trying convince you that he doesn't even love you anymore.

Because you know emotional abuse and gaslighting are just signs of love, right?

I have always looked at the situation from her POV ever since I watch Stars back in 2017. Especially the first episode after Mamo left and S.A.D and their two back up singers I mean the other two Starlights come to their school.

All Usagi wanted to do was try to get trough the school year without Mamo being there and be unbothered.

That's it.

Because the looks she gave them through that whole episode..

"I don't want to fuck with you. Leave me the fuck alone."

Which was so fucking relatable!!!

She showed zero interest in the fact S.A.D was an idol and The Starlight’s while the other girls was gushing over them. 

All she wanted to do was make it through the rest of the school year without Mamo in peace damn it!

She told Luna when she ask if it was a club she was want to join like the girls are and this was her answer.

If the school said they was doing a student exchange program with high school students in America aka Boston Mass where Harvard is at, Usagi would be the first to put her name on the list and get the fuck out of there to see her man. English be damned. ( Which how the other four and Luna treat her I don't blame her. ) ( She looks like an Alien in the last pic but the 90's anime have the best animation... )

When S.A.D and the Starlights come to school, so was so unfazed with the fact they were Jpop Stars/Idols while all the other girls around the school was fangirling since they were apart of the fanclub. Also while Mina was start scheming, Mako was fangirling, Ami was secretly fangirling and Rei went from her damn school to their school just to see them after school.

Just think about the fact that she technically met them first before the four groupies I mean her friends met them.

But the way they acted toward Usagi because it because she could careless about them and the other two..

Doesn't make any sense.

And I get it.

It was nothing wrong with them fangirling over JPop Stars/Idols/ Boy Brands.

I am a 90's baby who was kid during TRL days on MTV and it was Backstreet Boys Vs.Nsync Vs. 98 Degrees. ( This was before social media was a thing)

My classmates had pics of B2K, Pretty Ricky, and other black bands on the wall and fight over who was their fave.

Hell Might as well include Boys to Men, All for One, New Edition.

Hell my sister was a HUGE fan of New Kids on the Block when she a teenager. Which now a few years ago, she got into KPop and is a huge fan of Shinee and other Kpop groups like NCT 127 ( and the off shoot groups with it's fifty elven members lol) , EXO, Stray Kids and others. Hell it got me into listening girl groups like Mamamoo, Red Velvet, Girls' Generation, CLC, Black Pink, After School and others

So I understand that and the fact they are 16 year old's girls because I was their age once.

Hell Naoko in the manga got them fangirling over them as well but it's a balance which the 90's anime didn't give them. They kept pushing S.A.D on her for their own personal grain and not thinking about Usagi doesn't want NOTHING to do with them.

Because this shit in that Softball episode and the Episode where S,A.D is at her house alone..

She gives two fucks that S.A.D is an Idol. All she wants is to see her damn boyfriend.

And she keep telling S.A.D over and over again." Hey I have a boyfriend." Hey I really don't vibe with you. Leave me alone." Hey We are not dating. I got someone I'm waiting on to come back." and S.A. D keep thinking " Oh She's just playing hard to get. She really digs me. Let me keep throwing my weight I mean Swag around her. "

Which ends up to their own heartbreak on the damn roof when it supposed to been about her and not about them.

Cause that moment was about her. I’m really tried of seeing so many scenes in the 90’s anime that her feelings get sideline for someone else. I’m tired of the part of fandom saying it’s about both of them.

She is on the damn ground in the gotdamn rain venting about missing her (dead) boyfriend cause she doesn’t have a clue why he’s not replying in which she told NOONE the whole damn season that she haven’t and you have the nerve to be like “ Am I not Good Enough”

You would done so much better if you would have hug her or just told her “ Come on lets get you out of this rain.”

Since they keep putting themselves in a situation that they know jackshit about and thinking Mamo didn't give a damn about her which is father from the damn truth.

" Oh He's making her sad..He doesn't love her.." DON'T TOUCH SHIT THAT DON'T BELONG TO YOU!

The more insult to injury after the rooftop scence her "best friend" have the nerve to say this.

Child If your ass was paying attention the whole season instead of hightailing your ass from your school to the girls school just to see the damn Starlights you would have fucking knew all the damn time she told space alien dive ass that she had a damn boyfriend. She may have told yall that she haven't heard from him since he left but since yall been shitty ass friends for almost 200 episodes...

Especially one arc in particular which you sit up here , joked about her being dumped and precede to give her the most shitty ass advice you can give someone. " Oh You got to trust him" even tho he really give her ZERO reasons to trust him since he was hot and cold towards her. Which the rest of yall was like " Oh he had his reasons" which he did but yall didn't fucking rally behind her which yall most def didn't rally behind her dealing with Seiya and could told them to back off.

No yall asses was too busy using her proximity to Space Alien Diva ass and their two back up singers for yall own personal grain.

Be damned about a friend yall claim yall love and want to protect feelings.

HER FEELINGS NEVER FUCKING MATTERED TO NO ONE BUT FUCKING MAMORU!

But hey

People always going to use the break up arc against him when the one time he wasn't thinking rationally at all because all he wanted to do was protect her ( which he honestly though not from the dreams he was having but from himself because he still through he couldn't have no one close to him. Since he didn't have a set of friends and support system like Usagi did) which he didn't think it through and how it would affect her and himself greatly.

He was a freaking 17 years old boy having a dream about marrying the girl he is in love with ,having her die on which supposed to be the happiest day of their lives and having a booming voice to telling him " Oh you need to stay away from Usagi" which in his mind translates to him thinking that he is bad news/curse to her since she already died one lifetime because of their love.

Which he would rather just put the burden of staying away from her and dealing with it on his own instead of just telling her. Which for a 17 year old boy what the fuck do you expect? He have not matured yet which the most rational thing to do was to tell her. ( But hell some adults still don't tell shit.) Rei had dreams in S about the whole world including the girls getting destroyed and haven't told a soul until Pluto told her to tell them. No one got on her withholding important information about the world to her team.

But oh no

That's not forgivable but "Am I not good enough" is

When a person who made Usagi finally breaking down about missing Mamo and feeling like she can't do all this shit she is dealing with by herself into being " Hey what about me?"

I mean what about you?

Half of the season you got on her damn nerves thinking she was playing hard to get when she was constantly telling you she had a boyfriend and wasn't interested.

The rest of the season yall become friends but you thought you can " Treat her better than he can."

Then being upset that you found your princess and she's not interested in you so transfer your feelings to a person who most def not interested in you and your ass got hurt because you wouldn't simply listen to her and leave her the fuck alone.

Unrequited love is a bitch but come the fuck on.

Then it trips me out when people translates that scene to "Oh Am I not doing a good enough job to distract you from your sadness.” instead of S.A.D trying to “replace” Mamo is still making the scene about them.

Because S.A.D is still not understanding the fact that when she saw that rose, everything she held on inside the whole season come out and it was not only just about Mamo.

She have a group of friends and still feels utterly alone to the point that she didn’t even tell them she heard nothing from Mamo.

She has a guardian cat that she don’t even tell her what’s going on because she is so judgmental and still act like Usagi can’t do the work.

She misses not only Mamo that she doesn’t know what’s going on with him not retuning her calls or her letters but missing Chibiusa.

She have to deal with Outers and the Starlights bullshit and how the Outers don’t want to hang with S.A.D or be allies with the Starlights. While the Starlights don’t want S.A.D to do the same thing.

She constantly dealing with the inners shit and how they acted like groupies while using her to try to get close to S.A.D the until they found out S.A.D and Starlights identities. Which the inners are completely useless in fights she is having now.

She had to deal with S.A.D shit and not understanding that she have a boyfriend and just ask her to do things before just thinking she will automatedly do it with them.

To top that all off she got to deal with Galaxia and her people stealing people Star Seed.

All the while not having the one person that have been by her side since she become Sailor Moon. Mamoru.

No 16 year old girl should have to deal with that much shit.

And it all come ahead with her seeing that rose and think maybe just maybe he come back to her finally. That she’s not alone.

The saddness she feels runs deep and just because you think you finally decided to stop “ shoot your shot” and be supported of her you think it’s going to “Proof” magically disappear. Because you make her smile or laugh for a few minutes.

Naw dear It doesn’t work that way. No way in hell does it way that way because it’s more than her missing her boyfriend.

Usagi was depressed this season and you can’t tell me otherwise. So no amount of S.A.D trying to make her “ happy” would actually make her “ happy” if she’s not mentally.

But we should feel bad for S.A.D because they love her oh so much by pushing boundaries and throwing emotional baggage that weight a fucking ton on a girl who have to deal with her OWN emotional baggage!!

"Poor S.A.D! They just love Usagi so much. Bad Usagi for not bring their feelings into consideration while you are breaking down about being alone and missing your boyfriend.”

Poor S.A.D my ass

Sorrows, Sorrows Prayers Seyia

#Tanya rants about SM #I just went off at the end lmao #long post #I am sorry but something about S.A.D in the 90's anime and how people think they are the better choice for Usagi #when most of the season they annoyed the living fuck out of her #just gets a rant out of me every single time #because if this was real life and a person kept pushing a person to go out with them when the person clearly is not interested #people would be on that person side who is not interested #they wouldn't saying crazy shit to justify that person who is pushing #they would say the person who is pushing is wrong and need to back off #but nope not with this #then also in real life the person who is not interested friends who stand by their friend and tell that person to back off #not use the fact the person is pushing to get close with the person other friends because they are hot #it still frustrating to me because people would use oh it just fiction on every single thing in this show besides when it comes to Mamoru #then they put real life applications towards him #kiss Usagi when she is sleep they supposed to be allegory to Fairy Tale which is Naoko thing #oh He kiss her without her consent! He's trying to SA her meanwhile the person who really tries to SA her gets the #“Oh he's a villain doing villian things bullshit.” #2-3 freaking age gap that is not going to matter when they become adults #“Oh he's a pedophile! He should go to jail.” #Nephrite fucking grooming Naru which was an adult and using the living shit Naru to find the Silver Crystal and SM Identity #Oh they don't get together and he dies so it's fine It's so sad!!! #Like Fucking hell #The double standards use against that boy is fucking crazy. #Shit my damn tags become another rant lmao #Let me stop now lol #But one more thing #Be fucking fair instead of a damn hypocrite fandom

[welcometogrouchland]

We all assign Lilith as the Philip parallel when analyzing the similarities between the clawthorne sisters and the wittebane brothers. But have we stopped to consider for a moment that Belos saw Lilith as the Caleb in her situation? An older sibling who makes a selfish decision (in Philip's eyes) and betrays their younger sibling, leaving them a monster outcast from society??

We as the audience know just how different those situations were, but from Belos' pov...

I'm not saying Lilith was seen as so disposable and worthless by Belos, not just bc she was a witch, but because she was a Clawthorne whom Belos saw as a mirror of Caleb...but that's exactly what I'm saying and I'm realizing that Belos must've hated Lilith's guts more than we thought

#the owl house #toh #lilith clawthorne #toh belos #philip wittebane #obviously we as the audience know Eda is more analogous to Caleb #(someone longing for freedom and seemingly running from responsibility to get it) #(all speculation of course since we know so little about caleb but that seems to be the gist of things) #and that Lilith is the Philip in their relationship #(the more emotionally dependent and socially maladjusted one obsessed with conforming as a way to achieve status and love- #-has a (seeming in Philip's case) inferiority complex and can't comprehend their sibling making choices that don't include them) #but i remembered that Lilith is the older sibling and then this dawned on me lol #and yes i think Belos definitely had some kind of knowledge of the curse thing considering him and Lilith's deal in s1 #my personal hc is once Lilith rose the ranks she had a moment of semi breaking down and confessing to her ''sins'' #both in a creepy christian confessional way but. also i was thinking of andrias and marcy from the frog show hsbsjsnfk #anyway. Belos fucking hated Lilith didn't he. he was just waiting to screw her over #it's honestly kind of sad considering how much Lilith worshipped him and craved his (platonic) love and approval #obviously she was aiding a corrupt system but still. if anything that's just another parallel between her and belos lol #we all wonder why Lilith seemingly never interacted with other coven heads or why she resented hunter and I'm like #i think belos definitely isolated her on purpose yknow? he gave her the mission to find eda and then she put all her time into that #she probably barely talked to anyone other than kiki and the scouts. and the loneliness just fueled her desperation to get eda back y'know? #then for the hunter thing like. obviously it's Lilith's own insecurity at this teen prodigy seemingly favoured by Belos #and like. i doubt anyone in the castle besides kiki and some select coven heads really knew what went on behind closed doors #so Lilith just sees this kid who gets to be by Belos' side all the time and she doesn't get what he has that she doesn't #and because she's an emotionally stunted nightmare woman she turns it into this silly rivalry #and because Belos hates her he's like. lol okay i am not reassuring you abt your place in this hierarchy. i want to watch you suffer #and let's her feel these things and poor hunter is just like WHAT DID I EVER DO TO YOU??? #and he's mad abt it #anyway. Lilith thoughts out of my system for tonight but can you tell i love this cringefail slug woman?

[vvanessaives]

a girlboss (sad) and the cause of half of her problems (a daughter)

#hii this is like a timeline kind of template so there's spoilers be warned :] #and hiii again this is the first time i come up with my own template if u see smth weird don't mind it please <3 jkdfnk #DO NOT LOOK at vhanya's fc i just idk i struggled so hard bc i need someone with blonde hair so it's easier to edit to white and just jsdnfk #i was losing my mind truly #anyways rhaenne and vhaemond <33 my current brain worms #*ocstuff #oc: arianne #oc: visenyra #mine #this was supposed to be an arianne only show but then i was like...i will never get the energy to make a template from scratch so i'll #squeeze this as much as i can. i just needed smth like..relationship template but also timeline?? then i wanted to talk with no sense about #them and the second template was born. idk i just like intricate stories. much to say just vhanya is both sooo dumb and sooo..i want to hug #i could've easily go with haha she sides with the blacks :) but noo i want her to feel the pain coming with her choice till her very last #moment <33 i love torturing my ocs huh. and arianne..girlboss gaslight and so on..her putting her daughter above love... #the resentment and hate but love and affection that goes on between mother and daughter...shocking #there's so much i could say but my brain feels blank rn so rip #also watch me trying to find alternative ways to not just plainly write 'these guys fucked lmao' in vhaemond timeline dkfjfksd

[hella1975]

choked up in my room rn bc i was sat in the car with my mum completely lost in thought and she out of nowhere went 'are you okay?' and i was like 'yeah? why?' bc i was totally fine i was literally just thinking and she let it go and then five entire minutes later she goes 'are you sure? have i done something?' and she sounded so genuinely anxious and i could tell she'd been thinking about it the entire 5 minutes while id been completely oblivious and i spent so many years as a child letting everything bottle up until it all burst out in a messy and ugly breakdown that took her down with me and despite that she never hated me she only ever blamed herself for not seeing the signs and she's never been able to see my signs because i keep everything to myself and it terrifies her that she might miss something and she handles things poorly when she's scared and she gets too angry but fundamentally she's trying her absolute hardest to be a good mother and it wasn't always enough and i know i have to hold her at least partially accountable but also she's my mum and im her daughter and she always just wants to know if im okay and most of the time im not and somehow that feels like ive betrayed her

#like my mum is such a loud powerful force of a woman that these little moments of vulnerability where she's just HONEST with me #and she shows me that she's worried or scared or unsure instead of just constantly putting up a strong front #always always bowl me over #like ive literally said to her time and time again that i'd find it easier to communicate with her if she wasn't so strong all the time #like of course i hate crying and being emotional in front of you when youve made it v clear my whole life that you hate doing that #when it's you that's the one being emotional like that's not fair #but also being strong all the time is literally a survival thing she had no choice but to implement bc her own life was so hard #so how can i just ask her to lower those walls for me? even if keeping them up is to both our detriment? #and like ive talked on here before how she's openly admitted to me that she finds my temper harder to handle than my sister's #even tho mine is quieter and significantly less messy. but she's also said to me that in general she finds my sister easier to deal with #bc my sister's so open and if she's angry she yells if she's sad she cries if she's happy she talks ur ear off etc etc #i just insist on handling everything myself and the worse i feel the more i deal on my own and it TERRIFIES my mum #BECAUSE it's led to mistakes in the past but also just bc i have never ever doubted that she has so much love for me in her heart #like even when our relationship was at its worst it was never ever a lack of love and she just does genuinely care and worry about me #it's just if she's scared she just gets ANGRY and her angry means her hurting my feelings and my feelings being hurt means i shut down MORE #and it's literally the worst combo but we love each other so much that we're both clawing through it anyway it makes me want to cry #and because she's always so strong i FORGET that there's just a scared vulnerable person behind those walls #that has no idea what she's doing bc her own mum never taught her anything good #and my mum blames herself so completely for every bad thing like she says things like 'i feel like ive failed' and idk how to tell her #that she IS messy and incredibly flawed and she HAS done things that have hurt me beyond comprehension #and there are bad parts of my personality that exist because of her and her alone #but ive also done terrible things to her too like not even considering the fact our responses arent compatible and that hurts her #i also did some DUMB shit when i first started tackling ye olde mental illness that had a HUGELY negative impact on everyone around me #but she is still my favourite person in the world and my best friend and i love her and i know she loves me and i just want to hold her #girls when their mum isnt an all powerful being but instead a flawed human trying their best: SKJDGHKDJSHGJKSDHGJKSH #hella goes home

[235uranium]

there's a lot to say about how house md treats women but I will say the show lets the women be way more complicated than some shows today

like yall still aren't ready for cameron

#☢️.txt #cameron fascinates me. both how fandom responds to her and within the show itself #her moral conflict IS interesting and the bizaare pedestal she put house on is microscope worthy #actually how she views house in general interests me. shes the first to realize a lot of what he does is to intentionally distance himself #but she also misreads him in ways no one else does. specifically because she accepted that he does care! #i also still think about how she assumes house is at fault when chase kills the dictator which tbh is a REALLY interesting opinion to me #dont get me wrong house definitely changed chase and it turned into him becoming a lot like house #however. house freaks out every time a patient asks to die. even when its reasonable house spirals out of control #trying to find a reason for it to be unreasonable. it doesnt matter if a patient is about to die unless hes completely out of ideas he #physically cannot stop. its compulsive. he does offer euthanasia in certain circumstances and theres patients where he clearly #does not care if they live or die. but his entire medical identity is based on saving lives regardless of who they are #he doesnt /care/ that a dictator got killed and probably does think chase made a decent choice. but its not what house wouldve done #house mightve set something up. tipped off an insurgent. let someone into the room. but he'd force the decision into someone elses hands #but cameron does think house would kill someone if he hated them enough. because he plays god constantly #which is such a fascinating misunderstanding of house's motives from someone who generally likes him

[womantichrist]

.

#i think my sister's boyfriend is very nice but i also think he's a little dumb for her and i'm surprised she puts up with it sometimes #i mean i really do like him i just don't know if i'm convinced that she'd really be happy to be married to him #but of course the slightest show of concern that she might be settling stresses her out #and then she tells me that love is a choice and she chooses to love him and it's not a fairytale like i apparently think it is #and like i get that it's just...i don't know if you really have to convince yourself to love someone in the first place #i just want her to be happy you know?

[amatres]

anyway my personal ranks of origins backstories just in the game by themselves is brosca and tabris at the top, aeducan at the bottom. cousland i will admit is pretty impactful but i still feel like, as wild as an option it would have been, that a cousland warden should had the option to solo rule. they are from the only other teryn in ferelden and it's even said that it was considered for bryce to rule so like! come on!

aeducan is at the bottom because it so tightly locks you into siding against bhelen, which i suppose is fair for brosca being so skewed in behlens favor bc of rica, but brosca is just Good so i forgive that, while aeducan is just suffering.

i still stand by my idea that the 'noble' dwarven origin shouldn't have been the second aeducan child, they should have been the second aeducan's second in place of gorim. that way there would have been more room for roleplay. also the second aeducan child would have been a secret third option for ruler of orzammar that you would encounter with the legion of the dead that they joined after being kicked out.

you would have to both do the legion of dead quest to give them a noble caste, and also have high as hell coercion for it to work but it would really cool and also so funny to do. that said the origin just by itself is pretty fun, love being backstabbed by my second favorite baby brother from the dragon age franchise

mahariel and the magi warden are in the 'i like them but they don't feel as impactful' as much as it hurts me. they're both just kinda there, however that said if the game let you recruit jowan into your party that would bring the magi warden up much higher. alas.

#ama mumbles #dragon age origins #dragon age #sorry for putting this in the main tags yall can ignore me this is for the followers who want to block the tags lol #magi warden is brought up higher on an 'entire franchise' scale bc they feel relevant while the others... don't #but in just origins i will heartbreakingly admit they can feel a bit disconnected and underwhelming despite all the ties they have. #to the broken circle and to jowan bc of how smaller scope the choices you get in those two areas are #you get two choices with broken circle more or less and you either run jowan off or get him killed. sad. #which is fitting considering the fact they were forcibly disconnected from the world as a child by the chantry. anyway. #what if broken circle just let me kill the templars. what then. #if you could recruit jowan then they'd be tied to a companion and would probably get special dialogue with him #also then id get to drag my miserable adopted brother with me to the ass end of thedas. i was robbed when they scrapped that idea. robbed!! #to be fair magi feels less 'disconnected' in world and more just in a player sense #bc so much of the drama in it is entrenched in the lore of the world and when you don't know That then it feels. odd. #its a origin i feel many new players would have the hardest time emotionally getting into #mahariel however feels Very disconnected from everything. tamlen showing up as a ghoul i feel was added to remedy that a bit #bc otherwise theres really only nature of the beast and later on velanna but it's not even their tribe or someone they knew. so. 🤷‍♀️ #these are just personal thoughts tho #also why is tabris and brosca at the top? bc they go hard and i love underdog stories. #brosca also helps make paragon of her kind like. actually land. i never know what to roleplay otherwise bc Why Would I Care #tabris is just good baby #when will the city elf player background return to me #aeducan would probably be more bearable if they hadn't made harrowmount like That as king. or at least. foreshadowed it better #beyond just ambient npc dialogue bc at that point in game most pl are just running past #made paragon of her kind feel more well rounded. its very hard to get invested roleplay wise when youre not a dwarf pc #but that might just be my own failings i suppose #lots of tags #sorry i rambled again

[areyousanta]

I just love that my mother thinks my hobby should only be for profit, not just to make me happy.

#stfusanta #i showed her that zelda #and the first word out of her mouth were #how much did they pay you?? #no i made this for me cause i wanted to #oh well you should put this out there and say who wants it! #like really #why cant i have a hobby for me #she thinks anything i make needs to be sold off #unless its something she wants or someone in the family wants #then i have no choice but to give it away #half of the art in my parents house is things ive made #and my mother feels like its owed to her #for some reason #idk its just annoying #i really just wanted to show her how much better ive gotten from 2 years ago until now #at least my brother thought it was cool #so theres a light

[pepprs]

my mom isn’t letting my dad go back to his office bc him being out of the house stresses her out and makes her have a flare up and it’s like kind of insane. like i understand why the idea of him doing that would make her panicky and angry as someone who also struggles w separation anxiety and abandonment shit / has physical symptoms from that kind of stress (though not to the same degree ofc) but also he is a grown man. he should be allowed to go to his office and not have to shape his entire life around her needs. and she keeps guilt tripping him out of it and it’s impacting his quality of life a lot and the whole thing is kind of… hm

#purrs #delete later #also she’s guilt tripping me into coming to the stupid fucking potluck on sunday bc she needs the extra help and it’s like… what are you #gonna do when i move out. like i am a grown woman and i should be able to choose how i spend my two precious weekend days. and my dad is a #grown man and he should be able to choose where he works. like is that not a little bit insane. i get it but also….. i do think it s kind of #fucked ip that it’s her way or the highway and her needs take priority over all of ours and she’s asking us to bend to what she wants when #she wants it. like i get it bc she’s sick but it’s not fair for her to expect that from my dad especially. particularly when me and my #brother are back at work / school in more high risk environments than my dad who would be in a private office alll day. and the thing is no #one is brave enough to all her on it bc if we did it would be the END of the world. she even threw a fit on my dads bday and complained bc #the things he wanted to do were things she didn’t want to do like all the man wanted to do was go mini golfing and when that wasn’t good #enough he just wanted to go on a walk and my mom complained the whole time and also scoffed the movie he wanted to watch and said it was #boring and it’s like… wtf it’s HIS birthday??? but what do you expect from the woman who (and in fairness her friends got her these as gifts #but still) has TWO kitchen items that say some variation of ‘a marriage is when one is always right and the other is always the husband’ 💀 #i look at that little plaque every night bc it’s in front of the sink when im doing dishes and it makes me so fucking angry. like my dad is #a whole fucking person and he can be right too and he deserves to make choices and be happy and not have his wife put him down all the time. #idk. and she puts down his family all the time too and complains when he wants to do the most reasonable things for his own enjoyment that #don’t align with hers and criticizes his interests all the time and it just sucks to see. he never shows hurt or anything so idk how he #feels about it but it makes me so angry and sad and when i tell her to stop she just lashes out at me so. 🤪. like how do we get her to stop #making her needs more important than everyone else’s bc… she may be our mom / his wife / whateger but that doesn’t make her queen. no one is #(andalso this has only gotten worse bc of covid / her being sick. like this has been a lifelong thing it’s just it’s a lot worse now bc the #circumstances gave her room / forced her to have to take up more space. and it’s just so frustrating. i get it. but none of us are pawns or #dolls or subordinates or anything. there’s 5 adults here and we should all be able to make choices and not be guilt tripped by her. lol #)

[sepulchritude]

A fic detail I don’t talk about very much despite writing TST for almost 2 years now is that the entire fic exists in large part because I read a different fic that bugged me so much that I had to write a novel-length rebuttal about it

And I don’t blame them for wanting to write post-canon low-stakes fluff, godspeed and safe travels to them, but I just think that when a character has had a total memory/personality rewrite and then watched 10+ people die graphically and then gets released back into their old normal life (which they don’t remember) with basically no in-between or aftercare, and then two middle aged strangers invite themselves over and say “we’re so proud of how well you competed on the televised murder game and we’re glad you’re alive and oh right silly us let us introduce ourselves: we’re your mom and dad”—

I just think that deserves some narrative attention! I need to sink my teeth into that and shake it like a chew toy! There is so much going on here!

#proud that you did well on the tv show FIRST #THEN we’re glad you’re alive second #that’s already a hell of a thing #and then ALSO we’re your parents and you don’t remember us so we’re introducing ourselves to you #like #hello?? hello??? is this thing on?? #my name is [blank] i’m your MOTHER. it’s totally fine and normal that you don’t remember me at all #you expect me to believe this woman is not grieving her lost son?? she had to INTRODUCE HERSELF #you expect me to believe the main character feels totally fine and normal about this? he doesn’t even know these people!! #i am foaming at the mouth!! #i am putting these suckers under a microscope!! #god!!! #again this is less about that author’s choices and more about my rabid desire to watch this play out with the stakes i need it to have #i’m putting them in a jar and shaking them #the simple truth #danganronpa #drv3 #sepulchritudinous