#real life tbh

[aurumacadicus]

I am pro-strike I am pro-union I am pro-workers-getting-their-due I want to be inconvenienced A THOUSAND TIMES if it means people earn enough money

#me #real life tbh

[spyglassrealms]

had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing

#normally I don't chronicle my dreams here but fucking hell that one was funny #I think this would genuinely make tumblr better tbh #@ staff do this cowards #spy has thoughts #my life is a sitcom and i am my own laugh track #functional website #spy's smash hits #Glock function #edit for everyone in the notes saying 'everyone clapped' #I know I can't prove to you that it happened for real you're just gonna have to trust me on this #but I swear on my goddamn life I'm not making this up #I make so many conscious puns that sometimes my subconscious cooks up a real good one

[theminecraftbee]

before EXACTLY TODAY i was like "you know the stellar bodies imagery for the winners isn't super my thing, i get why people are into it but it always seems kind of forced and like a weird cause of fandom arguments". then i saw someone suggest cleo as pluto and i will now die for this symbolism. i get it. pluto, distant not-quite-actually-a-planet, the winner who doesn't really fit in with the rest. pluto, who wears its heart on its sleeve, the most notable thing you see in images of it. pluto, icy and distant and seemingly unapproachable. pluto, the god of death. pluto, the planet of destruction and then rebirth. pluto, which i also associate with time because i'm a sailor moon fan and i'm allowed to bring in "i think cleo would make a fantastic sailor pluto" if i want to. cleo is pluto and i love this for them,

#trafficblr #real life smp #real life spoilers #zombiecleo #incidentally this is the ONLY commonly accepted stellar symbolism that i think matches the sm counterpart #but listen. it still counts. #although the stellar symbolism WOULD make grian helios which IS a hot take i want someone to see through tbh #anyway.

[weallpartyatybcpatricksfuneral]

I think if you were to put one of those sensory videos on for ybc!patrick he would sit there and Watch like how a cat stares at a television

#tbh i feel like this would work on real life patrick too #even possessed he cant escape his neurodivergency #this is how joe could have lived they could have just put one of their phones on the floor with a little fruit dancing sensory video #and let ybc!patrick just Stare at it #he gets incredibe amounts of joy from it btw. both patrick and whatever is possessing him. #fall out boy #fob #patrick stump #youngblood chronicles

[b0tsbby]

Ya know the drill the tumblr girlies get B0ts art first

( i had to do this in two days for Comic Con don’t hold me to it🛌💀)

#trigun #nicholas d. wolfwood #low-key stampede? #I guess it is we got the gamer punisher #I think I flopped but we ball #trigun stampede #Oh and this was actual PISS STICKS to print #fighting for my life to this day to get the colours right on paper #tbh they even suck on my phone screen #this looks so sex on my iPad TRUST #the colours at least #wait this is technically my first Trigun Fanart #like the first real one #slay #and it goes to stinky boy Tristamp Wolfwood #my boy #my stinky boy that flops in the wind

[raayllum]

like The Dragon Prince, rather than painting the abusive parent as nothing but a one-note uncaring monster, going "your abusive parent can and will sacrifice for you, and they are still abusive, and you should still leave" is like. infinitely more valuable to me, tbh

#tdp #the dragon prince #bc that's what it's like in real life tbh #morally ambiguous fam #tdp soren #mine #text post

[softle0]

Simself living room :)

#I built this a long time ago idk if I still love it as much but still so cool #very minimalist tbh but in real life this would probably be a mess lol #softle0 #my builds #the sims 4 #simblr #ts4 #ts4 simblr #ts4 aesthetic #ts4 build #ts4 builds #ts4 interior #ts4 reshade #ts4 screenshots #ts4 screenies #sims 4 #sims 4 aesthetic

[asweetprologue]

i know probably nobody following me is even relatively in this fandom but I just finished s5 of the dragon prince and I gotta tell you. the canonical lovechild of the gay-coded villains was not something I saw coming

#OLD MAN YAOI MPREG REAL????????? #when he said OUR child I stg I have never been more shocked appalled and enthralled in my life #like it makes sense of course it was made from a joining of....... fluids......... #magic sex ritual tbh #and then to immediately divorce?? #I can't believe this shit #the dragon prince #tdp #viren #aaravos #viren x aaravos #viravos #they've always been strangely compelling in a deeply fucked up way but I didn't think the show knew that #they said we've given you 4.9 seasons of some of the best queer rep on tv #now get ready for the most toxic shit you can imagine

[detransed]

When people describe misogyny as the hatred of femininity and not the hated of women… literally a spit in the face to so many

#tbh if someone said this to me in real life i would slap them #they feel bold only but wouldn’t say it to the face of a butch #online*

[aurumacadicus]

Me: I can't stand April Fool's day, some sites become basically unusable

Tumblr: Boopometer. You can opt out if you wa

Me: GET FUCKING BOOPED IDIOT LMAO

#me #real life tbh

[cuubism]

a selection of The Library's customers

--

One day Hob will get used to The Library's many strange happenings. Maybe. Or probably not.

Today, it's the fact that there's a customer.

Sort of.

The small child who's essentially appeared in Dream's study frowns up at him, hands on her hips. She looks to be about nine. She's wearing a school uniform. Where are her parents?

"This," she says to Dream, horribly affronted, "is not the school library."

"I imagine it did not have what you needed," Dream says. Utterly unbothered by a random child wandering into his shop, seemingly out of nowhere. Hob watches with astonishment from where he's sitting at Dream's desk with a cup of coffee, evidently not needed for this interaction. "What were you looking for?"

"Unicorns," she declares.

It seems odd to Hob that a primary school library wouldn't have any fantasy books with unicorns in them, but what does he know. Dream nods with utter seriousness. "Please wait a moment," he says, and disappears into the bowels of the shop.

"How'd you get in here?" Hob asks as the girl sits down primly in a chair.

"I used the door, silly," she says. Not the front door, surely. Hob definitely hadn't seen her come up the stairs into the study.

Then her eyes light up. "Can I have a scone?"

Hob had brought over a container of them from the cafe, and Dream's been picking at them all morning. Hob passes the kid the container. What the hell else is he supposed to do?

Fortunately, Dream returns before Hob has to figure out what his adult responsibility is as regards an unaccompanied child that probably should be in school right now. Dream hands the girl a stack of at least ten books of varying sizes, presumably about unicorns. The girl looks through them, scrunches her nose up, and asks, "D'you have anything more scientific?"

Dream considers. Then hands her a large, flat book that he definitely hadn't been carrying a moment ago. The girl sets it on the ground, kneeling before it, flipping through the pages. It seems to be made up of scientific diagrams and large, full-color images. Hob sees viscera, organs, bones-- then the girl closes the book again. The cover says, Unicorn Anatomy: Piece by Piece.

The little girl smiles up at him, sharp and pixie-like. "Thank you, Mister Dream," she says, incredibly polite for a child currently grinning madly over unicorn dissections.

Dream nods solemnly. "I hope it will serve you well in your endeavors."

She trots off back into the stacks, to whatever door (?) she came from, and Hob turns to Dream. "Do you often get random children here?"

"The Library finds its customers," Dream says placidly. "She will find her way back to her classroom, worry not."

"Figured that, somehow."

Dream sets the other unicorn books aside and takes up a scone in their place, nibbling on it as he perches on the edge of his desk, looking down at Hob. He seems amused by Hob's confusion. "Why do you have a front door if people don't use it?" Hob asks.

"You use it," Dream points out. Which... is unexpectedly touching. Unexpectedly special.

"Fair enough," he agrees, voice tight.

--

Dream's next customer comes bursting in through a side door as Hob is helping Dream stack some new books. He runs in so fast he has to catch himself against the desk, his business suit tattered and smoking, his hair... literally on fire. He rapidly pats it out.

"Please," he begs, as Dream just observes him calmly from where he's sitting cross-legged on the floor. "I need--"

"1983 Alternate History," Dream fills in. "Yes, I'm sure you do. One moment, please."

As he disappears into the stacks, the customer leans against the desk, panting for breath. Hob doesn't think offering a scone is going to help in this case. He's not sure what else would help, either.

Fortunately, Dream returns quickly, handing the shaking man an equally tattered grey book that is indeed titled, in a concerning handwritten scrawl, User's Guide to 1983 - Alternate Version. And, subtitled: FOR EMERGENCY USE ONLY.

"Thanks," breathes the man, clutching the book to him. And with no more explanation than that, he runs back through the door he came from. Hob thinks he catches a glimpse of something very large and very on fire through the doorway, but the door swings closed too fast to tell for sure.

"They would do well to pass that around rather than returning it," Dream says, before sitting back down and returning to his book sorting.

Hob is naturally curious, but he thinks about all the fire and this time decides he doesn't want to know.

--

"...Hi?"

For once, Hob has successfully convinced Dream to stop working for a moment. Dream is, in fact, currently sitting on his lap, resting his head on Hob's shoulder in a half-doze as Hob regales him with a university story that's certainly crazy enough to fit in with any of the books in The Library. But Library customers don't follow a nine - to - five schedule, Hob's learned this well enough by now.

Dream does not seem embarrassed to have been caught in this position. He just stands fluidly, stretching his arms over his head. "Yes?"

The young person standing hesitantly in the middle of the room -- might be eighteen? twenty? once he crossed thirty Hob lost the ability to tell young adults' ages with any accuracy, they all seem like kids -- twists their hands together and says, "Could you help me find a book?"

Dream nods and waits for them to tell him which one.

The kid glances back and forth between the two of them nervously, like they think one or both of them might judge their selection. Hob tries to look non-threatening, even though it's hard to look more non-threatening when he's already half-sunk into the couch, wearing sweatpants, and was just caught cuddling his boyfriend in a semi-public space. He's also certain that whatever book this kid might be after, The Library definitely has something more concerning and more questionable.

Like Alternate 1983 History, for example.

Dream probably already knows what they're looking for, too, he always does.

Dream just tilts his head in beckoning and walks off into the stacks, his customer following behind, still wringing their hands.

Hob's fully expecting only Dream to come back, for his customer to disappear through another exit -- none of which Hob can ever find later. But they both come back through around ten minutes later, Dream carrying a book with a yellow cover. The study is close and cozy enough that Hob can make out the title -- Gender Queer -- as Dream passes it over, and oh, yeah, he gets it now. Granted, Hob himself has always been more of the type to punch people out whenever they give him any shit, but he understands the impulse, the need, sometimes, to hide.

The teen clutches yellow-covered book close to their chest. "You can take it home," Dream says when they make no move to leave.

They look down at the cover and then back up at Dream. "...I'm not sure I can," they say at length. "It's too, um. Obvious."

Dream just raises an eyebrow. "Is it?"

Hob swears he didn't look away, but as he follows the teen customer's gaze back down, the book has definitely changed. The cover is blue now, and it seems to be about maths, though it's hard to make out from far away. The kid flips through the pages, and they must be different from before for they look up at Dream in disbelief.

Dream, the fucker, just winks. Presses the book closed again, upon which the cover returns to yellow.

"Algebra is scintillating," he drawls, turning away and snatching up the container of scones from a side table -- a not-insignificant part of Hob's job, at this point, is just keeping Dream in scones -- "and suitable for any young person. Take a scone with you, too." He holds out the container. "Hob's are the best."

And with a tiny smile, the kid takes one.

#btw of ALL the books so far mentioned in this au Gender Queer is the ONLY one that's actually a real book XD #all the others are made up #conservatives in the US keep scapegoating Gender Queer and trying to get it banned #love hob doing literally fuck all in this. like does he ever work? who knows #all he does is snog dream a lot. good life tbh #bookstore cryptid dream #dreamling #my writing #dreamling fic #a warm up to hopefully get my brain churning enough today to finish in waking dreams

[theminecraftbee]

hm. the final two being scott and cleo. at some point i need to like, properly write an analysis post about scott and cleo and the ways that they like... so the thing is that even since third life the two of them have always kind of fallen back and leaned on each other. widow's alliance to gaslight gatekeep girlboss to chosen soulmates to technically being on different teams from then on but were they really. to "we can't team up again we're too good" in secret life to "he's kind of like your bdubs" in that same series when cleo just sort of assumed they were on the same side anyway (by the way STILL an insane way to put that etho). to teaming up again this time to being the final two to laughing and having fun until the end until a zombie kills scott (like a zombie helped scott kill ren) until cleo doesn't have to be the one to make the final blow. to the "we always do this we always gravitate to each other".

the thing is that it's not so much that they're soulmates, exactly (it's kind of a defining thing about them that they aren't), or that they're one of those star-crossed pairs the life series keeps producing (they don't shape each other, not really). it's that they're both, in the end, always there. a stable pair, a lighthouse and a ship in a storm. the thing that makes them different from so many duos is that there isn't really conflict, not really; they know the shape of one another. their first alliance will often be someone else; their first alliance is also to each other, no matter what they say.

so of course they laughed as they fought in the end.

it was them. it was never really a fight in the first place.

#real life smp #real life spoilers #trafficblr #zombiecleo #scott smajor #am i making any sense. #they're like fascinating to me because they are NOT one of the star-crossed dramatic pairs of the life series #and tbh i do not see it as a ship in any way either #but they are. a pair. they're just... a stable bonded pair. it's not something that's going to change either of them. #but it's something that is always going to be there.

[rosepompadour]

I love it when things like this happen. You can say that I have fallen in love — with life. With my own life, with my new life. All of it. - OLIVIA DE HAVILLAND, 1940

I was in love with Jimmy Stewart — crazy about him. It was a sort of high school pre-war romance. -  OLIVIA DE HAVILLAND, 1947

#i love them #they're the classiest most decent people from old hollywood like OBVIOUSLY they fell in love #i know she was nuts for errol but i'd rather go out and have an ice cream soda with jimmy stewart tbh #olivia de havilland #jimmy stewart #the silver screen #real life romances #*

[braisedhoney]

looks are deceiving.

back in the day i would have given anything for these two to fight. they’re already kind of dead, so it’s fiiine they're fiiiine.

#danny phantom #danny phantom fanart #dp #dp fanart #vlad plasmius #vlad masters #dan phantom #dark danny #please don’t tag as ship #pls guys. pls. #for the sake of my sanity. #ney’s art #i have two interpretations of this #one is that dan wipes the floor with vlad. like just *decimates* the guy. version 2.0 and all that #second one is that vlad has actually been holding back against danny and its way more even bc life experience and probably ghost power?? #either way they fight. very flashy. #side note but does anyone else find it funny vlad gets SO much buffer as a ghost #like bro. it's not subtle and i'm kind of endeared #real of him tbh #a lot of what i'm doing with this cartoony style is trying to get into simpler shapes. key word trying lmao #i have to resist the render impulse

[artificial-horizon]

spotted in my hometown 💚🤍🖤 whoever put this up, you're amazing! we aros are out here and we are never alone 💚

#feeling very cheesy okay #I've just never seen anything aro in real life so this is so heartwarming tbh #aromantic #aro #arospec #aro positivity #arospec positivity #queer #aspec

[child-of-hurin]

Part of what charms and compels me in Jeyne Poole's arc is her reaction to her predicament. All the female POVs in this book are dealing with a lot of gendered violence, and they all deal in different but dignified forms... Jeyne is not a POV character and she is absolutely not dignified lol. She cries and begs, she is utterly helpless. But unlike most women in this book who are utterly helpless, she survives. It's frustrating how fans refuse to celebrate that, simply because there is no glory in it.

#Sometimes I wonder if that's part of why fandom is so uncharitable towards her #like if she had some self-sacrificing sense of dignity maybe people would like her more... if she were resourceful or proud #boo! #she's perfect #i also think the absurd notion of arya 'mercy killing' her stems from this too? tbh #like - you think this woman is too pathetic to live? that even if she escaped bluebeard's castle her life is better over? #people will call grrm a grimdark author but this shit you see in fandom is 100000% more cruel than anything this man wrote #her pain is too real to her for games of honor to hold any meaning! she tears the veil she ruins the veneer #she has no noble bearing no honor no ambition no wolf no lover no knight she will not rise from this taller and wiser #none of the ways in which she'll change will be for the better and her pain will only reward her with more pain - the pain is worthless! #here is a child-bride suffering and nothing about that suffering can be made beautiful or meaningful- besides her escape #which theon instantly romanticizes.... what a moment #we flew! #i can't wait to read about her again #jeyne poole