#sorry its bad i dont usually do collages :

[forecast0ctopus]

hi there, I love your art! if you have time to answer, I was wondering if you have any tips or recommendations for drawing in a more expressive or cartoony style? I've been drawing for years but I always get caught up in the weeds and end up adding way too many details that don't necessarily look bad, but are too stiff and over-detailed. I really admire the way you capture so much in such clean lines, if you have any thoughts or advice I would love to hear them - thanks for sharing your art, have a great day!

ah thanks so much, i really appreciate it!! i totally get where youre coming from tho, i really tend to get caught up in the small things too (the amount of sketch layers i have on finished things is stupid lmao). anyways yes theres a few things i do to help myself out of that pattern!! im not all that great at putting things into words but hopefully the pictures help haha putting it under the cut because it'll probably end up long sorry

i cant speak for everybody but this is what i do! heres how i tend to approach my initial sketches:

i like to keep it minimal here so i can focus on the pose over everything else, i try to do it in one pass and not worry about the anatomy. usually i do a few of these kind of sketches before i figure out something i like. also something ive found recently is that, for me, zooming in and doing these sketches really tiny helps because i dont have the space to add in detail. i do this a lot when i thumbnail a sequence to storyboard (usually on paper tho) and it helps me focus on the idea over the drawing

after that i like to focus on shapes!

if theyre a character with loose fitting clothes i usually won't sketch out much anatomy and just get into the shapes of the clothes bc then i dont get too particular with proportions and all. im gonna state here that this is not an excuse to not study anatomy tho and the reason that this works out for me is because i have studied it haha

getting into details of things, i kind of try to walk the line between too little and too much? like with clothes the details i like to get are wrinkles at bent joints and obvious seams. with wrinkles i try to only do one, maybe two, because it can get excessive fast.

seams are really good for establishing the direction things are facing, like to read volume in 3D space. the ones ill pretty much always include (unless theyre not present in the clothing worn) are shoulder seams and pants seams. in my experience shoulder seams are great at telling the fit of a shirt without a ton of detail!

lmao heres a collage of expressions for an example. as far as faces go i like to exaggerate mouths and eyebrows a lot lmao its kind of hard for me to put into words my process here. i really like dot eyes bc i feel like i can do a lot with em in combination with lines. tho i dont usually use em on finished artwork. eyebrows and mouth are primarily what i use to establish a facial expression, though sometimes ill throw in a scrunched nose if the expression calls for it.

the whole "clean lines" bit really does help with making sure things dont look too cluttered, and the way to approach that for me is doing your line in just one stroke (maybe two if u want it darker but thats besides the point lmao) but yeah drawing from your shoulder, not having a hairy line, etc really helps not clutter your drawing anyways i think thats about it for expressiveness and clean lines idk if youve got anything more to ask ill answer to the best of my ability

TL;DR i try to focus on shapes and pose, and putting in just enough details to make action/expression read well

#ask #anon #i hope this is what you were looking for? im not that great at putting things into words haha #sorry i took a min to get to this ask haha i had to figure out what i wanted to say

[scribblescrabbledepartment]

hi there!! just discovered your blog and think your work is absolutely phenomenal!! i've been hoping to get into more physical art mediums recently and your work is super inspiring to me. sorry if you've already answered something like this, but would you mind talking about your creative process? for your collages (and other physical pieces) do you tend to have something designed conceptually and then execute it, or do you just kinda go with the flow? and where do you get your inspiration/ideas from? (like i thought the little fish in the bottle caps was SO clever). i apologize for the long-ish ask. super cool work and thank you for sharing it!! :D

auuauaua thankyouuu !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! with the collages sometimes ill have a general theme in mind & maybe some things i know i wanna use but generally i dont have any plan for them i just start slapping shit together. its usually pretty spontaneous its just whatever comes to me

for actual drawings theyre usually a Little more planned in that i sketch them in pencil before going in with the permanent stuff but i am Notoriously bad at not planning things out before i start the finished drawing. i dont do idea sketches or anything i just do whatever & hope it turns out😭😭😭 this has never helped me & i dont recommend it i am simply too impatient

[hitoshisbabygirl]

Author's Notes ♡: Hey Hey, it’s me, ya girl and I’m back with another collab! Ive always loved the roommates theme and have a few ideas for some other ones in my head making this. It’s kinda all over the place because it was a professing with their friendship! Yes I made a Zelda reference and I land about it no. I know Rapp is seen as violent and dense but but this is in a collage au so he’s just a bit...aloof I just love the idea of him actually being a big softie ʕ⊙ᴥ⊙ʔ. I hope you enjoy! ~ bunny ❥

Warnings : NSFW!!! (◎_◎;)

Sweet caring sorta himbo(meh?) Rappa, female oral, Big Dick Rappa , sorta size kink if you really sqint,cheater ex mentioned like once , language

Word count : About 5k! Yikes ^^’

Paring(s) : Kendo Rappa x F! Reader

Enjoy ♡

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Having Kendo Rappa as a roommate is an interesting feat in itself. He is big, and loud , very very loud. He wasn't a bad roommate he just..was like a cute large and fluffy puppy that didn't know his size...or power. Their interactions started as the two met during a halloween party one of the frat houses down the street thew. [ ] went as Midna, her best friend Rumi was dressed as Impa while the last two of her friend group , Amaya and Asa, a pair of sisters, were dressed as fairies. “[ ]! Rumi! you two are so cute! Zelda costumes?” Asa asked as her sister ran up to admire their outfits. “Yeah! [ ] wanted to do some characters that matched us y'know?” She said as she nudged her quiet friend , the girl jumped and laughed , scratching her neck as she gave the excited sisters a small smile “If i was coming out tonight I was gonna wear what i wanted to really wear” [ ] said as the group of them laughed and mingled with their other friends and classmates. While heading to get juice , she heard loud screaming , as the sport boys were starting to show up. First was the football team, then the basketball. Baseball and wrestling came next, then the smaller clubs finished them out. Sighing [ ] was content away from everyone as she watched mayhem ensure, chugging of barrels , more music, girls swarming around the players they crushed on as they did minor things, like talk to their teammates or eating from one of the big food trays laying around. Feeling a tap on her shoulder broke her from her people watching, Rumi giving her a bright smile as she took a cup and joined her. “How's my favorite antisocial babe doing now that all of the party has arrived?” She asked as [ ] gave her a pained smile, going to get more if something to drink “Well I don't feel the need to smack anyone is that a good sign?” she chuckled as she got a hug from the more energetic girl “That's my girl! Don't worry, i wanna get out asap but we’re gonna need our favourite pair of sisters before that can happen and it seems like they're fawning over some of the baseball boys as we speak” Rumi said as they watched a familiar tutu of blue go by, followed by a pink one going a similar way. “I don't get it… but at least their taste in men isn't too bad” [ ] joked as Rumi agreed , laughing “Yeah miss tsundere, you can't stand saps, or most of the jocks either” giving the white haired girl a look she rolled her eyes and gave her own laugh back “Yeah I guess i'm either picky or just got high standards” “Ain't nothing wrong with that we all do!” She said as she elbowed the girl beside her.

As the two of them sat there and talked Rumi glanced past her and her eyes widened, causing [ ] to stop talking “What is it-” before she could question her, the white haired girl jumped up, waving at someone “Rap! Over here!” Constantly yelling to someone [ ] started to ask again when a booming voice came from above her “HEY RUMI” a very loud voice called as stomping could be heard before it stopped “I see you took our idea huh?” With that comment [ ] turned around only to be face to face with a dark cover chest, only to then look up to some of the most warm and amber colored eyes looking down at her “Hello there little lady, I like your costume! Erm..Midna aint it?” The giant ganon dressed man questioned as all she could do was shake her head in agreement, causing the giant male to laugh “Awe don't be shy of me kitten i ain't gonna bite!” He chuckled some more as her friend jumped in “I told you she was shy! Be nice Rappa!” Rumi yelled at the flaming red head as he gave her a toothy grin “Oh I was just teasin’ , I bet I ain't hurt her feelin’s did I sweetheart?” Rappa questioned as [ ] face felt hot, hiding her face in her hands as the teasing duo laughed causing the girl to huff “I'm tired of you two already” She said as a giant warm hand touched her shoulders “Awe dont be like that hun, in time ya’l love me” Rappa teased as he gave her a smile,making her stomach flutter “Yeah! This is who wanted you to meet anyway [ ]! This is Kendo Rappa, our top wrestling boy, Rappa this is my adorable best friend [ ]!” Rumi said as the two gave each other a shy smile , a sly one creeping up on Rumis as she thought to herself “Yeah, this'll definitely happen”

Since then the two had become more acquainted , having many classes together and sharing some similar friends [ ] was used to the bruting and sometimes dense man making a random ( and loud) appearance. As [ ] sat in her mostly empty room thanks to her last roommate moving out after constantly breaking sound rules and getting into it with the girl downstairs for being in her bed with her boyfriend (Yikes) she felt a sense of calm. Closing her chemistry book and letting out a relieved sigh [ ] thought about the fact she was going to get a new roommate, the thought was nerve wracking but also it was exciting as well. It was almost too quiet , having the last room by the stairs meant she didn't have to deal with many people besides her friend group. They weren't loud , unless one of her friends decided to get laid and made way too many sounds, or if their neighbors under them threw parties or also had...extra partners coming around. She definitely could feel she was sorta excited she was going to have a roommate again. The sisters had a room to the left of her while Rumi had the one to the right, sharing it with a girl they knew from math. The rooms were not gender defined, some girls having rooms with guys and vise versa so it made it easy to get a room.

These dorms were also quite spacious, the walls not paper thin and a large enough area space that could house two or maybe even three people. So when she heard a knock on her door she expected it to be her new roommate she was advised would come today. Happily opening the door she was shocked and almost terrified to see just a box, well actually a few boxed stacked hiding whoever it was behind them. But if the faed rustic orange hair and wide shoulders meant anything she knew her new roommate already “K-kendo?” [ ] said as the boxes walked by her , landing with a soft thud as bangs covered the male “[ ]? Is that you?” moving his hair out of the way their eyes had the same expression, shocked. “Uh h-hey there sweetheart why isn't this cute, we’re roomies hun?” he laughed as she couldn't help but give him a smile back. “I never expected to see you as my roommate” [ ] teased as Rappa gave her a hardy laugh “Well it looks like me and you are gonna be close friends here darlin’!” With a wide smile he picked her up and gave her a tight hug, taking her breath away ‘ Oh boy i wonder how this will turn out’ she thought as she was eye leve with her giant puppy like friend, his eyes filled of joy

Which leads into now, [ ] trying her hardest to read up on what her next project could be. As she sat there thinking she heard the tale tell sound of her roommate entering with some of his teammates, the boys loud and rambunctious as they entered. Feeling a heavy hand on her shoulder she looked up to the towering boy that was her roommate, his eyes just as bright as usual. “Hey darlin, we're just gonna talk up sum strats a for the upcoming match and play some games in the back , is that alright?” He asked with pleading eyes as one of his more cocky and jock like friends spoke up “Well youre the man here, dont let some women say if we cant or can be here” Rolling her eyes and proceeding to stand up and push past the wide eyed boy who knew what was going to happen. [ ] took in a breath before opening her eyes to look up to the boy “Well it is my room, i pay shit here and the man over there didnt get this place, so i do choose who can and cant come through my place” She said as she pointed a finger to the boys chest. Trying to push his luck he pushed back against her finger “ I bet you just haven’t gotten a good enough dicking for you to just stay out of the way” He laughed. Before [ ] could hit him hard enough her rust haired friend moved in , clearly towering the boy “Yer better watch yer mouth, she has her right around here, im invatin her space so watch it before there's no place for any of us to relax without rules” He said as the boy sucked up any laughing and nodded his head in understanding. Surprised by her usually aloof roommate [ ] stood back and went back to her work, the other boys scrambling behind kendo as the boy who tried to challenge her jumped to follow, never making a move to mock or do anything again.

The boys picked back up and were having fun in the back room of kendo’s , sighs and groans when they lost and victorious laughs and screams if someone won. Once they all left and everything settle to a quiet rumble as the last few funneled out [ ] could here herself think, reading up on chemistry as she felt a presence behind her. “ ‘M sorry, i didn't know my question wouldve cause a roar outta ya..” Kendo started as she smiled gently, turning to face the wounded boy “Its okay….guess it just lit something in me i always did y'know?” She said with a small laugh as she went to type again, but was stopped by the hulking boy. “I gotta make it up to ya alright? I know i aint say anythin that he did but…. It feels like my fault y'know?” He admitted as his large hand covered hers. “You wont live this down will you?” She questioned as his eyes flickered up to hers, sparking. “Nope, not at all. Lemme treat ya right okay?” For such innocent words [ ] couldnt help the shiver that ran down her back at his words. Maybe it was because he was so close, or that the smell of his cologne was too much, either way her head was spinning as she let him still hold her hand as he tugged her away from her computer , his smile widening as she reluctantly shut the bright screen “Great! Now let's get something to eat im starvin” He rasped out as [ ] gave him a giggle that made the boy stop in his tracks. He always thought she had a cute giggle but this one,for some reason , made his heart and chest feel warm and tight. Ignoring the feeling he took the girl with him, the two headed out to get something to eat as they headed down , the sound of her giggling still running though kendos mind.

Getting a random frantic text from Kendo wasn't unusual, in fact it was quite common for him to do such, which now didn't faze [ ] at all but this one was...particularly odd giving what he was asking ‘Hair? And messy? What in the world is he up to’ [. ] thought to herself as she headed to her shared room with the boy, nervous of what scene she could be entering.

Sighing after his last text she hurried her way to their dorm room and in fact he did leave the door open, making her more nervous as she entered the living room. “Kendo?” [ ] called out as she heard a gruff sound come from her bathroom. Entering was a sight of its own; towels, a bowl of some..substance , bags and bottles of body wash and a one flustered and shirtless Kendo. “[ ]! ‘M so glad yer home here take this” The large man said as he handed her an old toothbrush that was frayed and covered with the same odd substance in the bowl. The lingering smell from the room eventually gave it away ; shampoos. “Uh why do i need this? And why is there shampoo on a toothbrush” She questioned as he groaned, taking the towel off his head as she blinked owlishly at his very faded red orange hair, the color now more of a neon pumpkin. Shaking off extra water caused even more of his hair to fall, landing between his shoulder blades as he gave [ ] a desperate look. “It wont come out, and the more i scub the more...orange i become. I look like a orange peel” He whined as [ ] figured out what he was trying to do

“ You wanna remove the color right? A bowl of shampoo and body wash isnt strong enough” Going into their kitchen she grabbed some baking soda and lemon juice , coming back to the hopeless boy “Let me mix something up ive used before okay? Then we can proceed with your hair” Two and a half hours later the boys hair was now a light peachy orange, just light enough to take up with bleach “Well, if were gonna go for blonde ill go get some bleach and some masks, deep conditioners too, your hair is definitely gonna need it and I don’t want it breaking off because you're impatient to take care of it” she sighed as he was amazed at his hair, running a large hand through the still damp mess atop his head “Wow yer good” He said as she smiled at him, taking her keys “And you have a lot of hair. I'll be back” She said as she hopped up “Wait! Lemme go with you?” He asked but also seemed to demand, pleading eyes looking down at hers as wet hair dropped onto his still bare chest.

Trying not to be hypnotized by where they landed and proceeded to slide down she looked up at her amber eyed friend, who was staring intently as he waited for her answer, soft “Please?” coming from his lips. Sighing dramatically on purpose [ ] laughed at him, giving him a grin “of course you can you big puppy” she said as he picked her up in a hug, a gesture that shows his excitement she's come to learn. Putting her down he went to go to the door before his friend called him out “uhm Kendo? You don’t have on a shirt” she said plainly as he looked at her, raising a brow as he gave his rebuttal “Its hot” He responded. Giving him a side eyed look she turned from him and towards their bedrooms, [ ] sliding into his. Soon she came out with a sleeveless one, throwing it at the hulk of a guy infront of her “You can't come in the store without one” She said as he gave a growl of his own, sliding the shirt over his head as they left their apartment “Well at least ya got me one without sleeves” He huffed as they started back to the door, heading out to finally go to the store to start another process on Kendos hair, the male just excited to finally get rid of his pumpkin hair.

As Kendo sat in the shared living room with [ ] , deep conditioning his hair at her yelling request (‘If you dont re nourish it before you want me to bleach it , I won't do it!’ ) he watched his roommate and now his best friend wanderer around and do housley things for their apartment, the girl content as she cleaned and sorted out things in the kitchen, her body turned away from him as he started to think over how beautiful he thought she was. He want the type to brag or gloat about having so many girls comment on his size , height wised and well sometimes other ways , trying to tempt him to them. All while his friends wanted him to explain how he got the attention from the other gender , Kendo hated to admit it but ,he only wanted his roommates' affection. He knew how put together she was, smart and kind. He saw what her previous boyfriend did, a cheater that didnt take care of the beautiful soul he lived with. He couldnt stand seeing her come home and cry herself to sleep broke his heart, and when he fought the cheater, in the act he didnt feel bad once. Of course it ended their relationship, and [ ] yelled at him for fighting , explaining how he couldve ended in jail for fighting her ex, but he argued it would be worth it.

Sitting and mulling over everything he realized Rumi was right, hed do anything for [ ] but not the same for the other females that passed through his life. She actually, was the first person he did that for and that thought made his head dizzy. Moving from his place on the couch he went to stand in the kitchen, waiting for [ ] to come back from her room. Hearing the iconic sound of her feet pittering across the wooden floor he gave her a lopsided smile as she jumped, smacking into the chest of Kendo. Before [ ] could fall from impacting with his chest he caught her, holding her arm to his chest. “K-kendo! You shouldve told me you were in here! Why are you in here anyway?”[ ] scolded as he laughed, moving out of the shorter girl's way as he started his staring again, this time [ ] noticed him “......What?” She asked as he looked down at her, an unreadable look on his face. “Kendo” she called as he hummed, moving closer “Yer gorgeous” Kendo blurted out as [ ] started to stutter, eyes going wide. Taking teo steps forward he essentially trapped his friend between the corner of their kitchen canopy. “Remember when I fought that bastard of an ex you had?” Kendo asked as he saw [ ]’s eyes go soft , shaking her head “What about him...i'm still mad you almost lost everything just to fight him yknow” she huffed as he poked her cheek “Id do it again if it meant you'd be happy again yaknow” Kendo said as he leaned down to push his head against hers, amber and [ ] eyes mingling. Lifting his large hands he traced each side of her cheek, analyzing over her face as he nuzzled against her nose “Stop playin hard to get would ya? Bad enough you got my heart all in your little hands” he whispered as [ ] just started at the giant , her arms gently coming over to cover his that were place on her cheeks “K-ken..i need to start you hair..” She hopelessly try to argue as he groaned, burying his face into her neck. Squealing at his damp hair touching her shoulder [ ] jumped ,pushing the large boy back “Your hair's wet!” She whined as he chuckleed, mo\ving back as it turned into a booming laugh “Oh my ‘m sorry babe , you look surprised” He said as she smacked hsi chest “Go to the sink, i need to rinse the conditioner” She yelled as he hwld his hands up in a mocked surrender, pulling his shirt up and off in one fluid movement. Caught up by him stripping his shirt off [ ] gave him a glance over, the heaviness of him admitting feelings for her in his own unique way still lingering in her mind as the toned and strong back of her friend made her head hazy. Turning around from the lack of notice of his smaller friend Kendo caught the eys of [ ] staring, her eyes quickly flickering to his curious ones as he grinned “See somethin you like darlin?” He teased as she grunted, reaching up to push his head in the sink “Shut up and let me do your hair”

And like clockwork, Kendo rappa was an icy blonde after two days, a break given to his long ,thick and wavy hair, the giant boy looking over his new look as he sighed happily, loving to have his hair finally look normal. “Well damn [ ]! Ya made it even better than what i was thinking. Look! My hair’s all wavy at the ends and it's soft! Whatever you made me do made it feel better!” He raved as the girl looked over her work. And in fact it was highly even, his hair consistent and lavishy soft. Giving him a shy look she giggle “That's what a deep conditioner will do to damage hair and the way i'm always untangling your hair for you, i knew it would need it before you wanted to go white” She said as he just kept running his hands in his hair, turning back to her “I could just kiss you right now!” He blurted out as they both froze at his words, eyes wide from both parties “I-I aint mean it [ ]” He croaked out as she giggled, stepping back from him “O-of course you didnt, why would you i mean aha..”She said as she moved away more , his own words started to hit him as he realized the reverse effect it was having “NO! No, I'd want to kiss you, I really really want to. I just...want it to be on your terms okay?” he said as he grabbed her arm, holding her in front of him as if she'd float away if he didnt.

“Kendo...I..” [ ] started as she came back to his hip, laying between his legs onto his thankfully covered chest “I just dont want to lose you if you decide you wouldnt want me around” She whispered as he pulled her even closer, kissing her forehead as he stared at her “Dont you ever say that again ya hear me? Youll be my princess and ill be your humble er..knight” He hesitated as he tried to think of a sweet way to explain his feelings. [ ] looked up to him as she felt here eyes feel heavy with tears. Before one even fell Kendo pushed his lips as soft as the strong boy could, wrapping a large and beefy arm around her waist as he slipped his tongue in her mouth, letting his hand slide down to pull her up to sit on the tops of his thighs while he leaned against his dresser. Softly [ ] pushed her hand on his chest and pulled away, now eye to eye with Kendo “Sorry , d-did i overstep my place” He asked as she let out a snot, before laughing. Confused, Kendo went to talk before she stopped him “No no, youre good, just that if we keep kissing on this dressed there's gonna be a hole in the wall” She said as she pointed to where the mirror kept tapping a spot, scrapes already aroring it “R-right!” He laughed too, picking her up to set her on his bed “Now then...lemme serve you princess” He said before kissing her again, not letting her rebuttal his own comment. As the two kissed he made sure to be as gentle as he could be , at times clumsily nipping her lip or his hand pulling hard at her clothes.

All in the name of wanting to show how much she meant to him. Soon he pulled away, a small string of saliva strung between them from the hearty kissing. “[ ]...i think i love you” He said as she gave him a soft look , trying to catch her breath from the dramatic kiss they came from “Good, because i love your loud ass too Kendo” She teased as he smirked,leaning down to bite her neck, causing her to moan loudly “We’ll see whos loud after im done wit ya” he gave his own tease back as he moved between her plump thighs, kissing the flesh there as he pulled her shorts to the side, exposing her flushed lower lips. Gasping she reached for his hand that held her legs apart causing the fresh blonde to look up at her, eyes wandering over her face for signs of him to stop “I-Im not used to being this bare sorry..” She whimpered out as it dawned on the other side of her words “Have you ever ate out baby?” he asked as she hid her face from him, shaking ehr head as he groaned, pulling her shorts down as he saw her lacy panties , a smirk placed on his lips as he peeled them off too, a string of arousal keeping them plastered to her lips “fuck, that bastared really didnt take care of you” he growled as she sat up to see his darkening eyes kiss up to her lips whispering out a “but i will” as he sucked one of her lips into his mouth, causing a lound moan from the woman he was inbetween. Slowly he licked up her lips, searching for that small pearl as she whined, a hand coming down to tug his hair. Grunting he soon found it, sucking onto her clit as she gasped, her thighs shutting over his head as he looked up to her, watching as her back arched off of the bed once her pressed his tongue hard against her clit. Softly he let a hand run under her thigh, a single thick finger tracing over her twitching hole as he pushed it in gently, making [ ] squeal. “K-Ken!” She called out as he looked up again, catching her eyes and flushed face on his actions. Making a show of what he was doing he let a second one join the first as he sucked hard on her bud at the same time making [ ]’s eyes roll back as her hand fell from his head, nervous od pulling too hard. Kendo however had other plans. Feeling her walls tighten around his fingers he made sure to find that spongy spot and hitting it, finally pulling his lips from her clit as he smiled “Uuh Uh doll, look at me” He growled as she hesitantly glances at him, regretting that she did. He looked way too good, hair a mess as he was panting, catching his breath from being down on her. With evry pump of his fingers his muscle in his arm twitched, making her own walls spasm as she watched it “Ya like it sweetheart?” He asked as she shook her head, watching him move back to her pussy “Good, cause i aint done” He said as he gave her clit kitten licks beofe slurping on it, throwing a wink at her as he picked up his pace, making [ ]’s voice rise as she felt herself getting close before quickly snapping at a particular hard thrust of his finger to her spot on her walls.

Letting out a light scream she came over his fingers and tongue, the male laughing gleefully as he sucked up her juices. LEtting her come down some he watched her face as bliss spread through her body and a sense of confidence whent though his. Slowly he picked up the pace of his fingers again, going from a shallow push to more stroking as he heard [ ] whine, grabbing at his hand “Uh uh sweetheart, you taste too good fro me to only let you cum on my tongue once” he said as he pushed her down by her stomach, letting her take his spare hand as he went back to suckling on her lower lips. He knew he had a lot in stored for her, and watching the newly admitted love of his life cum from his pleasing was enough for him to realized he needed to do more. Popping off her clit as puling his fingers gently out he looked at her ravished body, using his non wet hand to pull at his sweats. “Youre beautiful like this [ ]” kendo said as she took in heavy breaths, feeling her throat close as he stroked his massive size, rubbing the swollen head as he looked at her , giving her a soft smile “Ya dont have to take me just yet , hes just throbbin too much” He groaned as he twisted his hand hard over his leaking tip, feeling himself throb as he laid back on his bed. “Ride my face?” he asked with one of the most sinful looks [ ] had ever seen ; lustful eyes watching her as his large hand stroked his larger dick, the soft and fleshy muscle jumping at watching her crawl to him, throwing a leg over his neck

“I-i dont wanna suffocate you..” She said as he smirked before saying “Ya cant suffocate me i want it” Soon he grabbed her hip, pushing her onto his awaiting mouth as he picked up his pace, sliding his tongue into her twitching hole as she rocked her hips, keeping a steady pace as she held herself on his shoulder and headboard, ,depreate moand and cries tumbling out as he rocked her too, going from her clit to her dripping entrance, stoking his dick harder and harde as her moans spurred him on. Soon he felt the bud in his mouth twitch and throb harder, the sounds [ ] made increasing as his own hand sped up with his throbbing head, the telltales of them both getting close. A moan erruptred from the girl on his lips as she came again , her essence running down his face as he groaned, ropes of cum shooting onto his hand and stomach as he came himself, still stroking out what he could as the pressure he felt subside. Sliding off softly [ ] saw the mess behind her, taking it upon herself to lick up some of it as she was met with his same aber eyes, watching her move to his still hard member “Let me take care of you too?” she asked shyly. Fuck he was done for as he felt himslef hardend worse at her words, a large hand coming up to smack her ass as he psuhed her up and over his head, letting his tip and her swollen lips run over eachother. Slowly he pushed his tip past her budding lips, entranced by the way it swallowed her whole “Fuck...i love you [ ] and by the time im done with ya...youll know it” he whispered in her ear as she felet him push, more and moreof his large size spreading her lips father than shed ever had. Her eyes rolled up as she felt him bottom out, both moaning as he picked up his pace, making a soothing rhythm as little moans and whines came from [ ], deep grunts coming from Kendo as he kissed her shoulders and back, marking where he could as he felt himself get closer with how she was throbbing over his member.

Digging his fingers as deep as he could in her plush hips he let our a mantra of ‘Cummin’ i and ‘ I love yous’ in her ear as she pushed back against him, feeling herself teetering as he pushed as deep as he could go ,letting himself cum as she came too, the overwhelming feeling of him throbbing against her spongy walls and previous orgasms enough to push her over a third time. “[ ]” Kendo rasped as [ ] hummed , feeling her legs still shake with him in her “Im serious, i'm never leaving you...you're mine and i love you…” kendo said as he kissed the back of her neck, nibbling her ear as he stayed in her “Mhm….i love you too Rappa..”

#collab event #bnha smut #bnharem collab #kendo rappa #bnha rappa #rappa x reader

[mrfutureboy]

I would like to know when you started drawing and where your passion for fanart started 😊

Oh FUCK dude i did not see this i’m so fucking sorry this is so late 😭 damn you, tumblr, for not fucking notifying me!! Anyway buckle up this is gonna be much longer than you asked for <3

Honestly ive kinda been drawing all my life! I hope that doesnt sound dumb cuz obviously almost everyone drew pictures when they were kids, but i know that it’s been a consistent hobby for me since i was little. By the time i was in 3rd grade I was hoarding notebooks to draw in. Cuz that’s something fun about me: i had a real huge habit of drawing in things that werent sketchbooks. Through middle school and beyond I did buy/receive sketchbooks, but I started out with various kinds of notebooks. One I had from like 2nd grade was like a hardcover, stationary-type notebook that I drew cats in lol, and I have 2 velvet lisa frank notebooks from 3rd grade. In high school and college I had a really bad habit of drawing in the margins on my notes and on handouts the teacher/professor would give. Those classes where the prof just prints out all the notes beforehand and gives them to you to follow along? Oh man, I spent so many classes barely listening while I drew on them! I also used to draw on my physics homework and tests and sometimes I even got extra credit for them (thank you jeff :D). I actually have a folder of various drawings I’ve kept from that 8yr time period and a lot of them are on classwork 😂

Obviously, I’ve been doing a lot of digital art lately, which I’m sure is what u were more curious about rather than the shit about drawing on my homework. I got a surface pro as a graduation gift in 2016 bc prior to that i had a wacom tablet and a janky ass laptop, so the gift was kinda a 2-in-1: i can do schoolwork AND art easily! i like digital art a lot and honestly im still learning new things abt it every time i draw. I use Leonardo currently (i’ll skip that story) but I started out doing digital art on sketchfu WITHOUT the wacom tablet in maaaaybe 2012??? 2011??? does anyone on this site remember sketchfu? Honestly couldnt even tell u how i found that site hahah the internet was just full of wonders back in the day. RIP sketchfu. Once i got the tablet tho some time later i used sketchfu still (i think) but also gimp and krita i believe.

Oh i suppose I should mention that i took art all four years of highschool and also minored in it in college! So it’s something i did academically as well as for fun. I keep thinking about going to art school for realsies but idk. I’m already $$$ in debt from my first degree i dont feel like adding to that 😅😓

Ok now for the second part of your question: I’ve also pretty much always done fan art! Ive never really been one for OC’s, EXCEPT for the self-insert superhero double life “comics” i wrote about a poodle named Sassy when i was in third grade. And then the knock off “comics” i wrote at a later time which honestly it was weird that i did a knock off of my own thing rather than just adding them to the original or making it a spin off with at least one of the og characters. Cuz it wasnt a spin off!! But anyway there wasnt really much to any of these characters; i just needed vessels to get my weird ideas out.

So anyway yeah most of what ive ever drawn has been fan art or self portraits, because its just easier for me to take characters that already exist and bend them to my will (artistically). Well excluding art assignments in school i guess because i would usually have to draw something specific and therefore not something self indulgent. But yeah ive drawn for lots of fandoms like the earliest i remember is warrior cats. Then theres things like pokemon and warriors and random other books i read thru middle school (i used to read a LOT but now im practically illiterate); spn, sherlock, and marvel through high school; and then marvel and bttf thru the end of hs and beyond. Idk i also have always loved looking at other peoples fan art and so im like “shit i wanna do that too!”. Tho i will say marvel was my biggest fandom and the one i had the longest interest in, so that was probably where the passion REALLY came from cuz I was drawing marvel stuff for such a long time (tho not posting shdjsk u have to trust me), but ive been doing fan art forever :)

(Of course, a lot of the fan art i was making prior to recently was drawn in lined notebooks or on homework sheets or what have you, and I wasn’t posting really any of it, but i was still making it and a good chunk of it still exists. Oh i should also mention most of it was with pencils or ballpoint pens like i wasnt doing anything too fancy. There was some digital art in the highschool-college time frame but it also really wasnt…much. Honestly i barely posted any of it here but I know some of it’s on deviantart)

I cant pinpoint the exact time I started getting more “serious” about my art in general, but i know the first pandemic lockdown gave me more free time and i was less stressed about schoolwork so i just kinda had a good outlet. (Tho i will say that prior, I had been in a life drawing club for a short while, and i had also been working on a personal sketchbook project that had me pretty ~inspired~ to do art. Also i watched twin peaks around this time and it inspired a lot of Feelings and i was making funky collages and other art pieced that were sometimes related to that. Some of those are on deviantart)

Honestly I think the Big thing with my digital art was coincidentally getting back into BTTF the summer of the 35th anniversary bc the fandom here was THRIVING and i was like “oh shit wait i want to contribute!” But as i kept drawing i kept wanting to improve and that leads us to right now where im constantly trying new things (whether subtle or obvious) and challenging myself to do full body drawings with different poses, and doing screencap redraws and what have you for various reasons (backgrounds, proportions, pose, etc)

So yeah :) Basically I’ve been doing fan art forever (I didnt even get into all the mediums ive tried but that’s another conversation bc this is already so long and convoluted) and it’s kinda coincidental that ive suddenly really gotten back into it and have improved dramatically in such a short time. Thank you so much @rovermcfly for the ask and again im really sorry you had to wait so long for a response! Stupid tumblr

#rovermcfly #signed sealed delivered #THANK U SM I HOPE U ENJOY KY RAMBLING :) #id love to ramble more if theres anything else u’d like to hear about my art journey :) bc i know this is all over the place lmfao #i will say some periods of life were a bit more inspired than others and thats bc i like will not draw if im too stressed #bc likely if im too stressed im too tired. see: a few weeks ago when that job was draining my life force

[newtsshelbys]

Left Behind | Calum Hood

Pairing: College!Calum x College!Reader

Summary: As you got lost in the crowd of concert, you bump into a boy, you’re kinda familar with and from there on you are kind of forced to spend the rest of the evening with him and his friends.

Word cound: 3.9k

Warnings: drinking and that’s about it, ig

a/n: I had this in my drafts for a while now and felt like finishing it. It’s my first 5sos related imagine. It’s a little bit cheesy and turned out fluffy. Remember, feedback and criticism is highly appreciated. Enjoy!

The music was blasting through the speakers, flashing a wave of energy through your body you didn’t even know you had left in you anymore. You were standing for about four hours now and usually you’d be totally exhausted by now but the adrenaline that was currently streaming through your body made you forget about your tired legs.

As the next hook was about to drop the people around you opened a big hole in the crowd and everyone was ready to jump in. You weren't usually the type to join mosh pits because they always got so chaotic and sometimes you were seriously worried about getting hurt. But right now, at the moment, you didn’t care. You took a glance to your left to find your two best friends nodding at you, signalizing you that they were about to join the chaos as well. You smiled one more time to yourself, enjoying yourself before the beat dropped and every one jumped into that mosh pit, including you.

It was over faster than you would have thought. At that moment, you were completely carefree and the music owned your body. You were jumping, screaming and dancing, like every body around you. At some point someone stepped on your foot and it stung for a second, but you got over it fast as the act that was currently putting on a live show, started to rap their second verse of the song. The crowd calmed down a little and most people were facing the stage again.

You turned around to check if your friends were alright. But as you turned, you couldn’t make out one of the two familiar faces that belonged to your best friends. You started to look around, starting to ignore the loud bass, the cheering crowd and the flickering lights around you, as worry started to build inside of you. You couldn’t see them anywhere. You got your phone out to check if they already texted you but you had no new messages. You tried to call them with little hope and also no success. You lost your friends.

You thought about leaving the hall and just wait until the concert is over to meet with them outside afterwards, since you knew you couldn’t enjoy the concert anymore anyways. Not like this. You turned around to leave, as you bumped into someone.

You quickly apologized and moved past them, until, you heard them calling your name.

“Y/N?” they shouted after you. You knew that voice so, you turned around again.

“Calum?” you guessed making your way over to the familiar stature of the young man.

As you got closer you could make out his features and it really was Calum, standing there in front of you.

“It really is you! What are you doing here?” he smiled, taking you in for a short hug.

This took you by surprise. You didn’t know Calum too well. You weren’t even sure if you’d consider him your friend. But it also seemed like he was pretty hammered. But you had to chuckle at his question. What were you probably doing at a concert?

Calum was one of your classmates. And that was about it. At least that’s what you think, how he’d explain the relationship between you two. On your side, the thing was a little bit more complicated. It all started out about one and half years ago, since you started collage. You figured out fast that you had almost all your classes with the curly haired boy. At the beginning, he was just one of the guys you went to school with. Nothing more, nothing less. But over these one and a half years, you developed a crush on him. And you hated yourself for it.

You mostly knew him from little group projects you had to do in class. Either only the two of you or in a bigger group, but you started to notice, that you liked spending time with him. Even if it was only for school related stuff. The two of you even started to talk more once during these one and a half years but that died down quickly with him telling you how he was about to hit up another girl. He didn’t hurt you with stuff like that, it was just a bit frustrating sometimes.

You were likely to not tell your crushes about the feelings or liking you held towards them. For some reason you were always just too scared of rejections and you always thought it would probably be really awkward between the two of you if you’d have ever told him. You also didn’t want for him to have this kind of power over you. You imagined plenty of times the pity full look he’d have on his face, while telling you that you were sweet, but he didn’t return your feelings. And the thought about that always managed to send a cold shiver down your spine and it maybe still kind of hurt you in some way. Even tough you would never admit that to yourself.

So, you managed to live with the fact that he was just a silly crush you had and that you’d get over it at some point, which leaded you to the situation you were currently in. Still, not over him and him treating you like one of his mates. And the thing that all of his three mates from school were kind of your friends as well didn’t help at all. Sometimes you even did hang out together. You liked his friends and you always wondered why your relationship with him can’t be as uncomplicated as the friendships with the rest of his gang was. If you’re with them, you always get a laugh out of each other. It also wasn’t that bad if you were with him and his friends because they kind of distracted you from his cute curls, muscular arms and contagious laugh, which you loved to hear. You also loved when his lips where formed into a smile that took over his whole face.

And now you were standing there, worried about your friends, a little bit drunk, bumping into that one person you didn’t really expect to bump into. Plus, you didn’t really have the nerves right now to deal with the mess you called your feelings.

“What do you think I’m doing here? Same as you, dummy.” you replied, trying to put a smile on your face and ignoring the anxious feeling that were currently creeping up.

“Oh, yeah, that makes sense.” he smiled, biting his lip and looking down at you.

“Yeah. But, ehm” your voice sounded more concerned this time as you tried to form your sentence, “You didn’t per chance saw my friends around?”

You turned on your phone as you wanted to show him a picture of them as you realized his head was already turned to the front again, not listening to anything you just said. As it wasn’t hard enough to communicate in all that screaming that was going on, anyways.

“Calum!” you called for his attention.

He turned to you, a drunken smile on his face. You showed him the picture of you and your friends.

“Have you seen them?” you shouted over the crowd that was currently going wild.

“Them? No, sorry. But she’s hot!” he grinned, pointing at your phone.

Well, that didn’t really help, but thanks for your input, Calum. You rolled your eyes at him. It wasn’t like you were already in a shitty situation.

“I’m gonna leave. Have fun.” you screamed over the music.

As you were about to turn your back at the tall boy, he called out for you again.

“Y/N, wait!”

He called you again so, you turned around again.

“You really wanna miss the rest of the concert?” he asked like he’d genuinely care, “We can still go and search for your friends after and you can stay with us if you want”.

His offer took you by surprise, the second time this evening. But the suggestion was really tempting, since you really liked the act that was currently playing and you were excited for this concert for about half a year now. So, you decided to quickly text your friends, that they don’t need to worry about you and that you found someone you knew and could stay with for the rest of the concert. You said you were sorry and that you could meet outside after. Putting your phone back in your pocket you turned back to Calum, who was loudly singing along, knowing all the lyrics.

“You know what, yeah, why not.” you smiled up at him, receiving a smile from him as well which made you a little bit week in your knees, but as usual, you ignored it.

As the evening was going on, you caught yourself enjoying yourself more and more. Calum had also friends with him. The only one you knew was a boy called Ashton. You had also some classes with him, and he was one of Calum's closest friends, as far as you knew. But there was another guy you have never seen before. He introduced himself as Dylan. At some point you even found yourself grounding your body against his, not spending one single though on Calum.

The main thing why you keep hiding your feelings for Calum, was because if he rejected you, you still had to face him every day and with that you’d be reminded of the embarrassment. But like this, with a guy you’d probably never see again or only if you wanted, it was easy.

Even though you had fun with him, you knew what he was after. You didn’t really have much experience on the dating front, but you weren’t blind. And it actually felt really good to be admired by someone. It gave you the feeling on having power, which was quite the opposite of how you felt almost everyday around your long-time-crush, namely insecure. So, you enjoyed every second of it.

As the concert was over, you almost forgot about your friends. But as soon as you were outside, you heard your phone ring. Just then you saw that you had twelve missed calls.

“Shit.” you mumbled to yourself, picking up your phone.

“Y/N? Where the hell were you?” your one friend was asking you, worry clear audible in her voice.

“I met some friends form school, I texted you guys.” you tried to explain.

Within the conversation with your friends, Dylan asked you for your tag to go and get your jacket for you. While your friend was telling you something, you searched for your tag, found it and handed it to Dylan, mumbling a quiet, “thank you”.

“Did you hear anything of what I just said?” your friend hissed at you.

“I’m sorry what did you say?” with your free hand you held your other ear closed, since it was still kinda crowded and with that comes the noise around you.

“We are already on our way home, Y/N.” sighed your friend.

“What? You did leave without me?” you started to ramble. Worry was building inside of you for the second time this evening on the thought of how to get home all by yourself. It was a good one and a half hour car ride until you were back home.

“Melissa got sick, she threw up on the toilets and I don’t think it’s because of the alcohol. I decided to bring her home, I tried to call you but you weren’t picking up.” she started to explain, you could hear out of the way her voice sounded, that she was sorry, “I even searched for you in the crowd for fifteen minutes but couldn’t find you anywhere and Melissa could barely stand, I had to do something.”

“So, you decided to leave without me?!” you hissed at her, genuinely pissed that your friends left you behind like this.

“What should I have done, huh. Tell me. Should I have let her practically die outside and come back to party with you?” she said sarcastically.

“No, of course not.” you rubbed your forehead, trying to figure out on how to get home yourself.

“Also, where is the problem, why can’t you go home with your friends form school?”

“It’s not that easy, V.” you tried to explain but couldn’t find any words on how to.

No one knew about your crush on Calum, since telling someone would make it become real. Without anyone knowing you could still tell yourself that your feelings not there or that they will go away in a magical way at some point.

“Well, it has to be that easy, Y/N. Except you wanna go home all by yourself.”

“Yeah, I know.”

As you took a look in the direction the boys left to get their and also your jacket you saw them walking towards you.

“I gotta go, V.” you cut her off, “Call me if your home safe, alright. Oh and you owe me.”

“Sure, same goes for you” she hung up, leaving you alone with Calum, Ashton and Dylan.

Last named just handed you your jacket, “There you go.”

“Thank you.” you smiled at him.

“Yo, Y/N” Calum begun, pulling your attention at him, “Where are your friends?”

All the boys were looking at you, waiting for an answer.

“Well, they already left.” you admitted to them, “is there a chance that the three of you have an empty seat in your car for someone like me.”

“I’m sure we can squeeze you in there, Y/N.”, Ashton chuckles as he put an arm around your shoulder.

“Thank you guys so much, really”, you thanked them, relieve washing over you, but you were still a little on edge because of the two men that were walking behind you and Ashton, “You really are my saviors.”

Next thing you knew, you were 60 dollars poorer and walking through a shabby train compartment looking for an opportunity to sit. Your legs were tired as hell. You finally got to feel that, since there is no adrenaline left in your body.

As you found a part in the train where the four of you could sit together, Ashton claimed it really fast as theirs.

“Didn’t I say we could squeeze you in?”, he grinned. A grin you’d like to punch out of his stupid face.

You didn’t even mind traveling by train. It was just that you were really exhausted. Plus, the short walk through the cold and fresh, night spring air, managed to get you sober again. So, now you were trapped in that train, with your dumb crush, a guy that still hope to get you laid tonight and an Ashton that didn’t seem to shut up and the saddest thing, you weren’t even drunk anymore.

The train wasn’t even running for ten minutes until you fell asleep leaning against the train window.

“Yo, this girl is fire and I’m so gonna get it tonight, guys”, Dylan cheered.

But he seemed to be the only one to find it funny how he was messing with a girl that couldn’t defend herself at the moment, because she was fast asleep.

Ashton only commented with, “If you say so.” And he was quick on looking back at his phone. And Calum, he was sending a death glare Dylan’s way. He hated how he talked about you and the fact that you couldn’t defend yourself, made him feel like he had to.

Calum didn’t really like the game that Dylan and you were playing the whole evening, anyways. As he spotted you on the dance floor in the middle of the crowd earlier this evening, he had to smile to himself. For some odd reason, it filled him with joy, watching you having a good time. But as soon as he spotted Dylan behind you, his smile was fast to be replaced with a frown. That should be him, dancing and laughing with you, he thought. But he probably must have messed up at some point of the evening. Why would you prefer to dance with stranger than with your friend Ashton or more specific him?

“Man, I need to take a piss.” Dylan suddenly said out of the blue, making Ashton getting up and joining him.

As Ashton already left to get in another compartment where the toilet was, Calum held Dylan back by his arm.

“Stop it, man.” he warned, glancing at him to make clear what he’s talking about.

“Why? You like her?” Dylan raised his eyebrows in amusement.

“N- No. It’s just… she has a boyfriend, man” he lied.

“Alright, man”, Dylan put his hands up in defense and left for the toilets.

Shortly after Dylan disappeared, following after Ashton.

“Why did you tell him I have a boyfriend?”, you suddenly spoke up.

Calum jumped at your words, since he expected you to be asleep. Suddenly he found himself in a position where he had to explain himself.

“Dylan just isn’t one of the nice guys” he explained quietly with his head down, not looking at you.

You didn’t know where you got the sudden push of confidence as you placed your head on his shoulder and tried to get some more sleep since you had another 30 minutes in the train ahead of you. Also, you weren’t really to keen on having a conversation with Dylan at this point.

Calum’s heart skipped a beat at your sudden move. But at the same time, it feels so natural for you to be close to him and sleeping peacefully. Its kind of calmed Calum down at the same time as it brought, for him, confusing feelings about you up, which he tried to push down for the whole evening now.

“Boyfriend, huh”, Calum heard Dylan say as he spotted you asleep on his shoulders.

As you were at the end station and you had to get out, Calum tried to wake you up softly. He gently shook you at your shoulders.

“We’re here, Y/N. Time to get out” he whispered softly.

As you opened your eyes and looked up at him you had to quickly orientate yourself. As it all came crushing down to you, you took your head off Calum’s shoulder, leaving him instantly missing it. You didn’t know why you got so close to him, but it confused you beyond believe. Why didn’t he reject you as you put your head on his shoulder?

As Dylan, Ashton and actually also Calum were meant to say their goodbyes, because you had another twenty-minute train ride ahead of you until you were home, but the rest of the boys were living in the city, you hugged Dylan and Ashton wishing them a good night. As you were supposed to say bye to Calum, you didn’t know what to do. Hug him? Shake his hand? Wave at him? You heard Calum speak up.

“I’m gonna come with you.”

“What?” your mind took a few seconds to process what he had just told you, “No, Calum, you really don’t have to. I’ll be fine, I swear.” You assured him, since bringing you home would take him another hour to get home himself.

“But I want to.” he admitted, glancing at you with a soft smile covering his lips. His looks made you go week in your knees.

“We’ll leave you to it, lovebirds. Goodnight.” Dylan and Ashton said their goodbyes one last time, turning on their heels and walking into the opposite direction of where you were standing.

“Why?” you asked, your voice almost inaudible.

“Because.” was the only explanation you were getting out of him.

You decided to not further protest and just let him bring you home. For whatever reason he was doing it.

Your second train ride was manly quiet and filled with silence. It wasn’t an uncomfortable silence, thought, like you had expected it to be. You didn’t know what it was but something changed between the two of you. As you were looking out of the window, making out the few little lights of people’s houses, where they were still awake, probably watching TV and watching the sky, where you could make out a few little stars, since it was cloudy that evening, you could feel Calum's glare at you. It practically burned itself into your skin. It felt like if he would dare to look away from your slightly blushed cheeks, curvy eyelashes and at the way your nose was shaped, he’d die in an instant.

From time to time you send him a glance yourself, allowing your eyes to meet. You couldn’t hold the glare long, though, the butterflies in your stomach getting the best of you. You didn’t know why, but you didn’t feel insecure around you anymore. You felt safe.

As you got out of the train, Calum insisted on walking you home as well. Even though you though it was too much, since he must be tired himself, he didn’t accept a no.

“You enjoyed the concert?” he suddenly asked out of the blue, his eyes meeting the concrete walkway underneath him. It almost felt as he was getting all shy on you all of a sudden.

“Yeah, except that I lost my friends, and they also went home without me, it was great!” you stated, making your voice sound sarcastic.

“Wasn’t that bad after all in my opinion.” Calum commented, sounding sincere.

“No. No, it wasn’t.” you admitted. A small smile was forming on your face at the thought of how your evening went down since you lost your friends. It was definitely something you were expecting form yourself but it was fun. You told yourself to do stuff like that more often, without the part of losing your friends.

As you were standing in front of your door, the mood was tense. You didn’t know how to thank Calum properly for accompany you this far.

“I had fun tonight, Y/N.”, Calum admitted, breaking the silence.

“Yeah, me too.”

Last thing you knew after a few long seconds of silence, was Calum starring at your lips before his were directly connected with yours. It wasn’t like you weren’t already surprised enough about how this evening turned out, this action tops it all.

As you were over the first shock, you kissed him back. It was an innocent but still a pure kiss. And you didn’t want it to end. All the weeks, even moths of admiring this boy from the far and now he was kissing you. At that moment nothing seemed important, except for the two of you standing there. The thought of Dylan vanished your mind a long time ago and was replaced with Calum and Calum only.

As the two of you broke apart, Calum was the first one to say something.

“Tell me, Y/N. Why are we doing this only now?”

You pressed your forehead against his, smiling. At this moment you felt nothing but happiness. It was a feeling you haven’t witnessed this strong in quite a while.

“I don’t think you have a train back to the city until five in the morning.” you informed him, slightly giggling, “Wanna stay over?”

“I’d appreciate that.”

You opened your front door, stepping inside.

“You’re sleeping on the floor, though.”

#5sos imagine #5sos one shot #5 seconds of summer #5 seconds of summer fan fiction #5 seconds of summer one shot #calum hood #calum hood imagine #Calum Hood one shot #Calum Hood x reader #Ashton Irwin #Ashton Irwin imagine #calum x reader #5sos Calum #Cashton #Calum 5sos #cool guy cal #5sos #this turned out hella cheesy im sorry #college!calum

[colitisandme]

‘I am sorry, I can’t hear you, my ears are too clogged with rage’ is now one of my favourite sayings.

I am not an angry person. I honestly don’t like anger as an emotion. Before my body decided to spend its days thinking of new ways to test my patience and fast depleting reserves, I thought anger was a wasted emotion. In fact anger, shouting, aggression and general finger pointing makes me feel very uneasy. I despise shouting and intimidation so much I have been known to stupidly hurtle down the road in my bare feet, brandishing my stiletto heals to try and ward off verbal attacks between a purple faced, swearing, irate aggressor and a terrified partner. I have screamed at a sobbing, cowering girl to stay in her car and thrown said shoes at a guy, yelling ‘get the hell away from her!’ followed by hollering ‘you’d better run!’ at the top of my lungs whilst simultaneously trying to call the police at the same time. Stupid yes. What the hell would I have done if he had turned to me and said ‘ no don’t think I will’ ... cry and probably wet myself .. Hoping my catawauling and urine stained trousers would be a strong enough deterrent to stop him coming anywhere near me. But despite the probability of waking up my neighbours with my bat shit crazy screaming and as a result not being invited to the communal bbq due to them thinking I was mad, I could not have stood there put my fingers in my ears, shut my eyes and done nothing. I just couldn’t do that. so it was a stupid risk I was willing to take.

There have been many times in my life When I was perfectly entitled to be angry. There have been many occasions when I would have completely been within my Jess rights to have turned rage coloured purple, swore, stomped my paws, gnashed my teeth, yelled and howled at the moon like some kind of snarling werewolf, gnawing at myself like I was a tenderised pork chop. But I didn’t. I just accepted the situations and swallowed my anger, until unbeknown to me I had swallowed a whole nasty twisted, yarn sized ball of red, malton, lava rage which was just bubbling away inside my body and soul getting bigger by the day. And slowly without my knowledge, I was being turned into a pressure cooker. Ready to explode. That’s what happens when you don’t process trauma. You turn into a walking volcano; dormant but you still wouldn’t want to spend your holidays there in case it went off and the end result would turn you into a human s’more.

Chronic illness and extreme all over body pain certainly has a direct way of really making me adjust my usual Kum by ya, harmonious, zen filled, placid happy care free attitude. Waiting for 16 weeks to see a bloody rheumatologist really does test my sunny nature. Listening to rediculous conversations about how unfair it is that snuffles have floored someone for 3 COCKING DAYS makes me want to gnaw my own hand off in a rage, filled pneumatic chomping episode. In fact here is a short list of things, I have lovingly compiled, which make me cocking furious ... NHS waiting times, the Conservative party, selfishness, unkindness, thoughtlessness, people who don’t know how good they have it. Violence, homophobia, rudeness, the price of gluten free deserts, the fact that as soon as you add dairy free and gluten free together, food tastes like bloody cardboard. You would think with all the 1000’s of people with allergies, they would make more things like don’t taste and have the texture of gravel. Alarm clocks, people who hog toilets- I NEED THEM NOW. People who hate bobble hats - quite frankly if you do I hope you get eaten by dinosaurs. PIP - May you all be turned into bum boils. Flights of stairs, wading through the leaf filled, mud filled path along the main road which I have to drag my case and myself along to get to work. JUST BECAUSE THE COUNCIL DONT WANT TO BUILD A COCKING PATH TO WALK DOWN. ...I AM NOT A BLOODY HEDGE DWELLING ANIMAL, WHO ENJOYS SPENDING MY DAYS ROLLING ABOUT IN LEAVES. Clearly the arsehats in the council must express great delight and cackle with glee, watching me cry and gnash my teeth as I wade through a million sodding leaves to try and get to my bus... swearing and looking like a cross between a walking leaf collage and Stig of the dump as I get into work... Very professional and not at all like a child’s art project... Animal cruelty, child cruelty, people cruelty, bigotry, hateful wankers, clowns, (there’s no need for them) self - entitled aresholes, (no need for them either) losing things, and generally the poor, sorry state of the world at the moment. In fact all of these things make me absolutely and honestly incandescent with rage.

And whereas before every item on that list would have made me cross. I now am very open with the fact I get angry about them. Before I would be frightened to express how I felt about certain moments, certain situations and trauma due to fall out. But now after getting ill, I have allowed myself to be much more open in the way I feel. Not in a rude way but in a way where I finally know I deserve better than being thrown emotional scraps in an attempt to keep me docile and placid. After the trauma, I would then work my butt off to be a better human in order to diffuse the situation, as I believed it was my fault which led to more internal anger towards myself. This in built, all consuming, conscious un-human effort and desire to keep my anger hidden about injustices and trauma faced throughout my life has partly contributed to how lousy I am feeling now. I am now absolutely sure that the anger I have submerged, suppressed and cajoled to stay hidden, has wrapped itself around my muscles, joints, bowels, limbs, throat and hands like thick, spiny, vines trying to drown and suffocate me. When I first went to see my homeopath I told her I felt like I couldn’t breathe or speak and like I was a corked bottle who couldn’t express what I felt due to fear and the incorrect view that I deserved it. But it’s interesting because I am and have always been so verbally expressive. I have a theatre background for gods sake and could readily take on any character and perform it. I wrote, I sang and yet when it came to the simple task of telling someone they hurt me or when I tried to express my feelings as myself and not as a character, the time came and I couldn’t do it. I was standing in the spotlight and I was mute.

I am not now. I have finally found my voice. I know that the vast majority of traumas in my life were not my fault. I am now no longer scared to ask for help, for support, for understanding, for time because I know I deserve and need it. Especially now, especially because my body behaves like an unco- operative toddler refusing to do anything I ask it to do. I am not angry that I am ill. There would be no point in taking my rage out on a situation I cannot control. I am however angry about the things which make mine and others situations worse, because there’s no sodding need to make our lives more difficult. Lack of services, extortionate waiting times, an NHS bursting at the seems with no funding, no staff and no resources to change the situation. I am angry there isn’t more knowledge and research about our diseases. I am hopping mad there isn’t more understanding or support from our communities... I am furious about the injustices we go through, but mostly I am filled with hulk like rage that we are made to feel as invisible as our illnesses and disease are. I am not the kind of person to shout, yell or intimidate. I will not dominate using hateful language or aggression, but I can and will use my words and my Jess ness to try and make a difference, even if it’s in a small way. Becauase I have learnt it’s okay to be angry. It’s okay to stamp feet, to cry and chew the carpet with the utter unfairness of it all. It’s okay to gnash your teeth and howl at the moon when you are in pain, or tell someone when they have let you down. It’s human and it’s healthy. If you feel angry please release it in a healthy way. I am not advising to go on a monster, smashing table, hurling puppies out of the way, yelling at babies, rampage, but at the same time please don’t swallow it and remain mute. Even if that moment makes you come up with a 109 creative new swear words, say them in private, under your breath if necessary, but say them. And if you need to feel angry about past situations do it now before the feeling eats away at you until it manefests somewhere else or as something else. We are what we feel. Good, bad, angry, calm, hurt, victim, survivor ... so once we start to fix our soul we start to fix our whole. 😊 So be angry if you need to be, but most importantly be honest with how you feel, and if someone makes you angry or has hurt you or let you down never be afraid to tell them so, because if we bottle it all up, it’s us who really suffers in the end.

[llampacaeatingguppy]

*me, shaking* if it's not too late, is it okay for me to ask for all 15 of those oc questions for jasper/friday? if that's too much, feel free to pick and choose, buT ALL ARE GREAT QUESTIONS??

THEY ARE ALL GREAT QUESTIONS AND MY MOMMA DIDN’T RAISE A QUITTER I’VE GOT YOU

Jasper:

1. Have they ever pranked someone? If so, who was it, what did they do and did the prank work?

He LOVES to pull pranks!! Just harmless, fun ones, and he feels like they have to be on “equal footing,” so to speak, so no pranking teachers/bosses/older adults or little kids in general (with the exception of his dads), but it’s definitely there. Shawn and Emily are two favorites

2. What makes them smile the brightest?

The BRIGHTEST? oof, that’d probably be pleasant surprises.

3. If they made a five song playlist, what songs would they want on it and why?

Mr. Blue Sky – Electric Light Orchestra – honestly? because this is the most Jasper song I know

Devil in Disguise – Elvis Presley – his favorite Elvis song

Somebody to Love – Queen – Because I said so and this boy is a sap who loves being in love

Don’t Go Breaking My Heart – Elton John – his dads would sing it a lot and it’s just attached to good memories

Overtime – Cash Cash – Bouncy

4. It is 3am, your OC is in the loopy giggling stages of being sleepy, what are they laughing about and who are they with?

This happens a LOT with Shawn, because 1) Shawn’s naturally a night owl and WILL keep Jasper up late, and 2) he’s usually been roped into helping him with his homemade monster movie projects, which all HAVE to have that “it happened in the dead of night” vibe because that’s just how Shawn is (and shot in the dead of night for authenticity). And they’re usually laughing about something cheesy and ridiculous

5. Your OC befriends a little bird who, every morning sits on their window sill, what name do they give the bird? What type of bird is it?

He’s probably call it something like Bird, and it’d probably be something mundane, like a pigeon

6. Your OC is at a karaoke bar and they see a cute person across the bar who they want to impress, what song do they sing?

Here’s the thing: my brain tells me that this would not at all happen because Jasper can’t sing without sounding like a wounded moose. My heart tells me he’s going to go completely ham on the first Elvis song he finds and humiliates himself and everyone he’s with

7. Out of an impulsive decision your OC dyes their hair and gets a whole new outfit, what do they now look like?

I can see him going with a dark maroon for the hair. It’d be fun/not a natural hair color that he might justify dying his hair, while still being understated enough to not be competing with his casino-sign-reincarnated-as fashion outfits (he actually does put effort into things like that, which is why he’s never gone through dying his hair even though he likes the idea. Who wants to match their clothes with their hair all the time? Too restricting). As for a whole new outfit? Anything is possible.

8. What is your OC’s favourite joke?

*insert bad pun here*

9. Your OC makes a poster and ships it to their best friend, what does the poster have on it and how does their best friend respond?

A badly-drawn picture of mothman. Shawn doodles little hearts and raunchy phrases all over it and sends it back

10. Your OC just got up, they are groggy and in a dark room, all of a sudden they are attacked by lots of kisses from a dog they do not own, what is their next decision?

Next (unconscious) decision: scream like a little girl

Next conscious decision: turn on lights and locate nearest father to see if they can keep it

11. Your OC is at a party and decides to start some chaotic fun, what do they do?

Unleash a jar of charmed anarchist origami frogs

12. If your OC has to describe their best friend, how would they describe them?

“Pretty chill, for a kinky weirdo.” 

13. Your OC is taking care of a child that is not theirs, what happens next?

Depends on the kid, really, but if they’re even remotely high-energy he’s probably going to have as much fun as they do running around playing games until the kid’s tired out. But Jasper’s good with kids, and has been the favorite babysitter of multiple childhoods

14. Your OC decides to live life on the edge for a day, what do they do?

Jasper: I’m gonna try deep dish pizza

Shawn: Dude sweet!! Is it a recipe or did you find a place that sells it?

Jasper, holding a box of very not gluten free deep dish pizza: uhhhh yeah… that’s totally what I mean… of course I’m not going to potentially hospitalize myself just because I want to try the mysterious mushy crusted pizza

15. The moonlight is shines upon your OC as the stars dance upon them, there is a near by river filled with gentle waters as fireflies hover above the tall grass. What does your OC do next?

Stares at the fireflies. Maybe tries to get close to one after a while, but I don’t actually know if Jasper’s seen fireflies before and they’d completely mesmerize him

Friday:

1. Have they ever pranked someone? If so, who was it, what did they do and did the prank work?

She has, actually! She would attempt to prank her parents when she was little. They didn’t really work, because she wasn’t good at it, but her dad would have the decency to pretend they did

2. What makes them smile the brightest?

Any sort of recognition/positive feedback from her mom

3. If they made a five song playlist, what songs would they want on it and why?

Istanbul (not Constantinople) – Milan & Phoenix (electroswing remix) – This has always been a Friday song. No idea why. She’s an electroswing girl

Big Bad Handsome Man – Imelda May – she just likes it

Jasper and Winter are the two characters I have with much of a playlist so I’m going to cheat out of this one I guess Mom did raise a quitter. Sorry, Mom.

4. It is 3am, your OC is in the loopy giggling stages of being sleepy, what are they laughing about and who are they with?

Her Dad’s bad radio karaoke on the drive home from a convention

5. Your OC befriends a little bird who, every morning sits on their window sill, what name do they give the bird? What type of bird is it?

What name: Ferdinand

What type of bird: some kind of chubby-looking finch thing

6. Your OC is at a karaoke bar and they see a cute person across the bar who they want to impress, what song do they sing?

I’m too busy trying to imagine Friday trying to impress a cute person instead of just trying to exist in their presence, awkwardly give them gifts, and hope that they notice to even think of anything

7. Out of an impulsive decision your OC dyes their hair and gets a whole new outfit, what do they now look like?

Friday’s always wanted to try the biker look, but doesn’t think she can pull it off, so we’ll go with that. And red hair, because she’d look pretty with red hair and that’s a great hair color anyways (so sayeth the ginger)

8. What is your OC’s favourite joke?

Sarcastically saying “no” when someone asks you to do something, while doing the thing

9. Your OC makes a poster and ships it to their best friend, what does the poster have on it and how does their best friend respond?

A collage of some sort, probably based off of something she found on Pinterest. It’s hanging on the wall next time she comes to visit

10. Your OC just got up, they are groggy and in a dark room, all of a sudden they are attacked by lots of kisses from a dog they do not own, what is their next decision?

“Get off me, get off, yeah, you’re a nice dog, but you need to get off-”

11. Your OC is at a party and decides to start some chaotic fun, what do they do?

Friday doesn’t really start chaotic fun. Well, there was one snowball fight she started with Jasper, but that doesn’t count it totally does she just doesn’t want to admit to it because she lost

12. If your OC has to describe their best friend, how would they describe them?

Lovable idiot that must be protected at all costs

13. Your OC is taking care of a child that is not theirs, what happens next?

Nothing bad while the kid’s there, but she’ll be so done if they stay for too long. She loves kids, but they drain her energy like tiny gasoline thieves if she has to interact with them for too long

14. Your OC decides to live life on the edge for a day, what do they do?

Throws a party. Does a sexy cosplay. Talks about her feelings instead of living in a state of constant emotional constipation. Any of those would work, really.

15. The moonlight is shines upon your OC as the stars dance upon them, there is a near by river filled with gentle waters as fireflies hover above the tall grass. What does your OC do next?

Stargaze

#my ocs #thank you for the ask!! #w h e w #Friday Milewski #Jasper Rift

[swyllh]

i spent a ridiculously long time agonizing over this, but 2 + minghao for the 100 ways to say i love you thing!

(2. “this reminded me of you.”)

premise: minghao can’t let go.

pairing: minghao x reader

genre: angst, textfic

tw: major character death, lots of swearing.

10 february 2018

minghao [1102]: hey

minghao [1102]: ITS YA BOIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

minghao [1102]: img1834.jpg

minghao [1104]: i set your phone to silent

minghao [1104]: this doesnt work when ur phone is ringign

minghao [1105]: haha

minghao [1105]: thats actually q funny wtf

minghao [1106]: like

minghao [1106]: lets pretend to talk to u like ur alive

minghao [1106]: while ur phone is ringing next to me

minghao [1107]: ………….

minghao [1110]: yeah i don’t kno wwhy im doing this

minghao [1111]: dr lee said i t would be good

minghao [1111]: oh 11111

minghao [1111]: 1111*

minghao [1111]: u used to wish on them

minghao [1112]: i thought it was so stupid

minghao [1112]: still think its sutpid 

minghao [1113]: man its so hard

minghao [1113]: m so used to u biting my head of f

minghao [1113]: i miss you

minghao [1115]: i miss you so much

minghao [2032]: k SO

minghao [2032]: i finally got to finidhign

minghao [2032]: all the fuckdifnf funrrrl 

minghao [2033]: moeny

minghao [2033]: haaaaaaaaaaaaahha

minghao [2033]: djd y inow funerla s cost soc much

minghao [2033]: 3000 %94_43?@589;@(p;%

minghao [2033]: ‘’’’’’’’

minghao [2034]: $7_*

minghao [2034]: $7__________________________*

11 february 2018

minghao [1422]: fuck

minghao [1422]: seems like drunk me couldnt turn back

minghao [1422]: the keyborad

minghao [1422]: keyboard*

minghao [1422]: lmao

minghao [1426]: this is actually fucking funny

minghao [1426]: but what i wanted to say was

minghao [1426]: cremations cost like 100000

minghao [1426]: ……………..

minghao [1426]: did i extra type

minghao [1427]: u dont even give shits about numbers

minghao [1427]: rmb that time

minghao [1427]: you like,, frget the decimal

minghao [1427]: we ended up donating like half our rent

minghao [1430]: about rent

minghao [1431]: do i sell this house now

minghao [1431]: i mean i like it

minghao [1431]: its close to the metro, theres two supermarkets, a library

minghao [1432]: but its also hell to get to work

minghao [1432]: mine not urs

minghao [1432]: ……..technially its not a house

minghao [1432]: god how do u still osund so bitchy after death

minghao [1443]: also moving out will mean moving your stuff too

minghao [1447]: idk i dont want to think about that

minghao [1820]: img1886.jpg 

minghao [1821]: the sunset today is so beautiful!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

minghao [1821]: fuck

minghao [1822]: img1887.jpg

minghao [1822]: img1888.jpg

minghao [1823]: img1889.jpg

minghao [1823]: which one

minghao [1823]: for insta

minghao [1824]: should i do a collage

minghao [2311]: 1111

12 february 2018

minghao [0608]: going out fr a run

minghao [1050]: ur mum wants to meet

minghao [1050]: think she wants to get ur stuff back

minghao [1111]: 1111

minghao [1111]: your mum says youre in heaven

minghao [1112]: she misses you a lot

minghao [1115]: ha fuck

minghao [1115]: next thing i know im gonna be waiting for you to text back

minghao [1251]: what do i say

minghao [1251]: screenshot_89.jpg

minghao [1251]: “sure!” ?

minghao [1252]: is it too morbid to add an exclamation mark

minghao [1252]: ???

minghao [1252]: sure.

minghao [1253]: the fullstop looks mean

minghao [1253]: ………………

minghao [1255]: god why cant she just

minghao [1255]: i said ‘sure’ w the fullstop

minghao [1255]: screenshot_90.jpg

minghao [1256]: what do i say now?????

minghao [1256]: why cant she get her own imaginary u

minghao [1256]: smh

13 february 2018

minghao [1637]: just got out of therapy

minghao [1637]: dr lee was talking abt the 5 stages of grief

minghao [1637]: kind of zoned out

minghao [1638]: was cool tho

minghao [1638]: youd like that psychology talk

minghao [1639]: can u imagine someone

minghao [1639]: a scientist

minghao [1639]: just going up to grieving people

minghao [1639]: like “hey can i know how ur feeling”

minghao [1639]: checking in every five days

minghao [1640]: or getting them to jorunal

minghao [1643]: kind of what i’m doing

minghao [1644]: but fuck if i let u become a memopad

minghao [1648]: anyway the bus is here

minghao [1648]: think ill sleep 

minghao [1946]: how the fuck

minghao [1946]: do u eat so much rice

minghao [1946]: i cooked exact as usual

minghao [1947]: img1890.jpg

minghao [1947]: r u fcuking kidding me

minghao [2313]: soz i missed

minghao [2313]: 1113?

minghao [2313]: at least its not 1112

minghao [2313]: 1113 is like a deliberate delay

minghao [2314]: a statement against the futility of numbers. freewill vs fate, control and determination. 

minghao [2314]: ok im sorry thts bullshit

minghao [2316]: i wont miss it again

14 february 2018

minghao [0028]: fuck

minghao [0028]: its valentines day

minghao [0028]: fucccccccccccck

minghao [0028]: everynes gonna be gross

minghao [0029]: ugh

minghao [0029]: like us

minghao [0029]: sto p soudnign so smug.

minghao [0812]: i still cant believe they skated to yoi 

minghao [0812]: what a time to be alive

minghao [0816]: ur probably so pissed that ur missing the olympics

minghao [0819]: i just checked, mens singles is on the 16th 

minghao [0819]: bet u chen rekts hanyu 

minghao [0820]: actually, no

minghao [0820]: youll cry if he does

minghao [0824]: god how many posters of hanyu do you have

minghao [0828]: youll cry if i take them down

minghao [0828]: p sure if u had any say

minghao [0828]: ud want them to paste it all over ur tomb

minghao [0829]: ………………

minghao [0830]: right now im really really hoping you dont hav some weird will that wants me to do that

minghao [0831]: ur so gross

minghao [0831]: ur room is so gross

minghao [1215]: i cant do this

minghao [1215]: ur room smells like you

minghao [1216]: fucking nivea extra fresh

minghao [1216]: cant believe im cryign over deoderent 

minghao [1217]: deodorant

minghao [1217]: even the word is gross

minghao [2311]: 1111 

minghao [2311]: i miss you. 

minghao [2312]: spent the day in your study

minghao [2312]: your mum is coming over on saturday so i packed a bit

minghao [2320]: ok i lied

minghao [2320]: i cried all over your things

minghao [2321]: how

minghao [2321]: how do you just keep crying

minghao [2321]: i should be dehydrated by nw

minghao [2322]: fuck

minghao [2322]: think im crying again

minghao [2322]: is it possible to die from crying so mcuh

minghao [2323]: i miss you

minghao [2323]: the bed is so cold

minghao [2326]: i miss you. so much. all the time.

15 february 2018

minghao [1128]: they’re going to terminate the contract on your phone

minghao [1128]: and then i wont be able to message you like this

minghao [1129]: i panicked and called dr lee

minghao [1129]: she said it was a good thing

minghao [1130]: fuck this

minghao [1130]: i know it isnt like ur gonna text back

minghao [1130]: but 

minghao [1131]: i hear your voice and it makes me safe

minghao [1131]: like youre here

minghao [1132]: fuck.

minghao [1516]: so i forgot to water your cactus

minghao [1516]: its dead

minghao [1516]: sorry

minghao [1517]: maybe oyull take better care of it now

minghao [1517]: actually

minghao [1517]: do plants go to heaven 

minghao [1518]: they can right

minghao [1518]: since they were once alive

minghao [1518]: lol

minghao [1520]: that means books cant

minghao [1520]: god it must be so boring up there

minghao [1522]: unless heaven has their own publishing company

minghao [1538]: or phone service

minghao [1540]: is that why you cant text me back

minghao [1540]: cos im texting the wrong number

minghao [1541]: i swear if u pull a new phone hoo dis

minghao [1542]: …. i cant even kill u

minghao [1542]: or its like overkill

minghao [1543]: jesus

minghao [1546]: youre always one step ahead of me huh

16 february 2018 

minghao [1741]: happy lunar new year

minghao [1741]: i went to your mum’s. we watched yuzuru hanyu.

minghao [1742]: ok FINE he won okay

minghao [1742]: nathan chen fucked up 

minghao [1742]: did u mess with him from above

minghao [1743]: thats not a fair win ok

minghao [1750]: your mum started crying in the middle of lunch.

minghao [1750]: she cooked all your favourite foods.

minghao [1751]: fuck you.

minghao [1803]: im sorry i dont mean that 

minghao [1803]: i love you

minghao [1804]: i love you

minghao [1804]: i lov eyou 

minghao [1804]: i love you 

minghao [2203]: ive been thinking

minghao [2204]: its getting hard to

minghao [2204]: talk to you 

minghao [2204]: at you, like this

minghao [2206]: im not

minghao [2206]: this sounds bad

minghao [2207]: it probably is 

minghao [2207]: every time. i do. its like.

minghao [2207]: i know youre not going to reply.

minghao [2208]: i knw youre dead

minghao [2213]: youre dead

minghao [2218]: but i miss you so much and it doesnt stop there and i still love you but your phone is still lighting up i still keep it charged and every time i try to talk about you its hard to not feel like im being ripped out from inside and i lov eyou still 

minghao [2224]: i dont want to forget you.

minghao [2248]: i dont want to wake up one day and not think of you and meet someone else and fall in love with them and throw all your things away and forget how you look like

minghao [2255]: i forgot wwhat you looked like this morning

minghao [2256]: i was looking at a photo of us

minghao [2256]: and for a moment i thought you looked strange

minghao [2257]: like, was your nose /that big

minghao [2257]: HAHAHAHAHA jk

minghao [2259]: i almost lost it. i wanted to break things and 

minghao [2302]: i dont want to say it

minghao [2311]: 1111

minghao [2312]: good night.

17 february 2018

minghao [1050]: your mum’s here

minghao [1050]: im so nervous haha wtf

minghao [2047]: the whole house is so empty wow

minghao [2047]: it’s so crazy 

minghao [2048]: but ur yuzuru posters left marks on the wall 

minghao [2048]: :p

minghao [2051]: its so weird 

minghao [2052]: its like youre not here

minghao [2055]: dr lee says its a step forward but i feel like somethings missing. and that things are going to fuck themselves up now.

minghao [2104]: its like i can hear everything now that all ur files and stuff are gone

minghao [2110]: this house is too big for me

minghao [2111]: shold i get a dog?

minghao [2111]: what if it dies

minghao [2111]: your plant died

minghao [2112]: bc i didnt water it

minghao [2114]: did you die because i didnt love you enough

minghao [2115]: the last thing we fought over was so stupid

minghao [2115]: it was about bills right

minghao [2117]: are you still pissed about that

minghao [2118]: im sorry.

18 february 2018

minghao [0233]: im unplugging your phone.

minghao [0234]: the contract’s expiring soon anyway.

minghao [0234]: so.

minghao [0240]: you’re at 76%. 

minghao [0240]: so this is kind of anticlimactic

minghao [0252]: i think ive spent too long holding you back

minghao [0252]: your mum gave me that look when she found out i was texting you.

minghao [0254]: im just scared. 

minghao [0255]: i dont want to forget what its like to love you

minghao [0301]: 49%

minghao [0510]: i had a nightmare

minghao [0511]: almost recharged your phone on auto

minghao [0512]: tired.

minghao [0512]: love you.

minghao [1110]: youre on 1%

minghao [1110]: i love you.

minghao [1110]: i love you.

drafts

[!] message undelivered - [1111]: i love you.

#seventeen #seventeen imagines #minghao imagines #minghao x reader #seventeen fanfic #textfic #angst #hi sorry #this looks really long but its just the formatting #rip #aLSO I REALISED THIS DOESNT EVEN FIT THE PROMPT RIP

[cleansoil]

painting rosé n waterfalls also black nail polish please

thank u for asking ily. also small disclaimer i am a little drunk so sorry for how long and messy these answers are lol

painting: in what ways are you creative?

im gonna preface with i hated writing this answer because idk how to say im good at things and i feel like it all sounds pretentious 

i dont think of myself as a creative person at all because im not very good at coming up with original ideas in art so this made me hmmm.

however im really good at cooking which is nice bcs i often cook for my friends and they are like this is the best version of this dish ive ever had. and also being vegan means you kinda have to be creative bcs i really like meaty/cheesy/creamy things which is like the opposite of vegan lol so working out what ingridents can replicate that has taken a lot of research and testing. and then having no money bcs student loans, mental illness & drug addiction meant i had to do that without spending money or energy. so i had to work out how to create a food that was vegan, cheap, very easy to make, and would taste as good as any not vegan thing.

im also good at giving people different perspectives on their problems especially if it involves empathising with someone else. and coming up with reasona that could be causing someone to act a certain way. ive experienced a range of things and im intensly self aware so im good at explaining to people why they are acting a certain way or why someone around them is acting a certain way. having a lot of undiagnosed mental health problems as a teenager lead to me doing a lot of research into psychology so i now know A Lot about mental health and understanding why people do hurtful things to others.

i also study philosophy so i know how to structure arguments well and how to pick them apart very thourghly. i can come up with a way to argue anything and to refute any argument. this is similar to the last one but yeah im generally good at seeing things from different perspectives and understanding why people would have those perspectives from studying psychology & philosophy.

i amost forgot this one but i have an 'interesting' fashion sense. its something i actually dont think about anymore because its such an ingrained thing to me at this point but im good at coming up with styles and outfits for myself. i like finding what colours go together and look good and how to make something look simultaneously ridiculous yet coordinated.

i make pretty journals too, working out the combination of scetches, colours, personal writings, collage, etc is fun and some of my journals are BEAUTIFUL its annoying i cant generally show them around to people because a lot of the text is very sad and awkward to read but i appriciate them.

in general im good a curating beautiful moments, i often find myself thinking about how something would look from an ouside perspective. something ive been told a lot is that my life is very aesthetic. i will find a way to place myself in a situation eg. like watching the sunset from a roof top with a loved one smoking a cigarette. im just generally good at making life look like an indie movie. or thinking that something will be a fun story to tell so creating it.

and lastly i like tattooing people, im v much a perfectionist which is useful in tattooing by hand because its gotta be very perfect lol.

rosè: what’s your opinion on shyness? 

firstly this seems like a weird thing to have an opinion on lol but

i guess its interesting how pathologicalised its become vs how it used to be considered a personality trait. things like avpd, social anxiety, autism/scd would make someone appear shy but then like are there people that are just shy without having a mental health issue? then then also introverts vs extroverts. like i seem shy to people because of my mental health problems but i dont think of myself as shy because at baseline im a massive extrovert, i love people, and i like sharing things about myself. but im not "shy" i just have a disorder like its not a personality trait its an illness. i kinda feel like the concept of being shy just dismisses social anxiety as something thats normal and okay when if your afraid to talk to people you should find ways to get past it and maybe get therapy if you can.

waterfalls: describe your perfect date.

i dont think its about the activity of the date itself but more about the person. i also dont think there would be any one perfect person. overall it would have to be beautiful, romantic, interesting, memorable, and long. probably having food and wine somewhere then going to a beautiful location and having interesting and deep converstations. i usually date people that are pretty into physics & philosophy & stuff like that because i like learning from people. maybe my ideal date would be sitting on a cliff at sunset while someone explains their theory of the universe to me. yet at the same time i appriciated the last date i went on where i went to the pub w a dude (who was not as attractive irl as he was in his pics) and he talked about how he had an incredibly smart lizard then i downed his beer bcs we were getting kicked out and i showed him my titty tat. i guess i think all dates, good or bad, are perfect because they are a good part of human experience also im a lonely lil bitch id take any romance rn. one of my favourite genre of dates is where the other person doesnt realise its a date because those are often very cute and less nerve wracking and i like the bit after where one of you if like haha that was a date and the other is like omg... i didnt know but u hoped

black nail polish: what do you do to pamper yourself? 

ngl nothing rn and i should probably change that lol

#send me more of these pls im living

[mysmessmistake]

How about College AU with the RFA and Minor Trio? Like what their major would be, roommate, stuff like that

I don’t know muchabout collage majors, so I’m sorry if you were looking for specifics. Also Iwasn’t sure if you wanted a MC to be included or not, but I included themanyway. The RFA isn’t running by the way. 

Yoosung

Yoosung was taking a course in     order to become a vet     

The work was brutal

Though he loved it, and he was     sure he wanted to help pets    

It was still brutal

Shares a dorm with Saeyoung &     Saeran

He goes to almost every class

Mainly because he’s scared of failing 

Has all nighters too frequently

Can often be found crying in     the library at 3am as he writes an essay 

He tries to join astronomy club

But he can’t keep up with them     because of his gaming addiction    

Saeyoung fuels this addiction

Saeyoung also messes with him     by hacking into the game and getting a bunch of rare stuff for his own     character     

“I have to defeat him! I     can’t let Saeyoung defeat me!”    

There goes Yoosungs life. 

He meets MC in his class

And

Oh god is he in trouble

Finds he can’t focus in class     because of you

Saeyoung convinces him to talk     to you about a problem he’s having    

So he catches you in the     library one night

“Hey, you’re MC right?     You’re in my vet corse! I was wondering if you could help me with     this…”

He tries to be sly but he’s red     in the face the entire time    

Your friendship and more     blossoms from there on out.    

Also 100% shows you off to     everyone once you get together    

Jaehee

Business & hospitality     major     

She’s a fucking boss

She’s bomb at studying, and you     best bet she gets top of the class    

She works for that shit

She shares a dorm with a girl     she doesn’t know very well, and doesn’t really talk to due to conflicting     interests.     

She’s super invested in the     coffee club at school    

To the point where she becomes     the leader of the group!     

You are also in the coffee club     and you instantly connect with Jaehee, so naturally you two become     friends.     

She’s had friends, but not     friends like you.     

You also met everyone else     through Jaeheee

Jaehee knew Zen, V and Jumin,     and through them she knew Yoosung, Saeyoung and Saeran. 

And some guy named Vanderwood

She has all nighters frequently     as well

Goes to all classes on time     unless she’s sick

Even then she gets someone to     send her notes

A year or so through her     college experience, after she’s calmed down a little about the idea of     college

She realises there’s something     she feels about you that isn’t… just friendship 

She doesn’t say anything, she’s     afraid of your reaction    

You aren’t stupid, you know the     looks she gives you

So you make the first move

It’s slow

But it’s nice

Zen

Drama and Literature major

Teachers pet + ladies man

You’ve seen Monsters University     right? Well, he’s like the Sullivan of the college. 

He has his own fan club

Jaehee takes part in said fan     club     

His roommates are … Jumin and     V!

It’s a little bit of a     nightmare     

His relationship with Jumin is     pretty much the same relationship as cats and dogs…

However

Jumin is very good at calming     Zen down when he gets angry, and bring him back to earth when he’s too     full of himself     

And Zen is very good at     grounding Jumin when he gets a little out of hand, or his ego is too     large.     

And V just tries to make     everyone happy

So it works

He doesn’t study excessively 

“God gave me a gift! Why     would I need to study?”    

He changed this thought after     he failed his first test    

You thought he was a little     arrogant     

He thought you were cute

He needed help with a few     things so you offered to tutor him 

After a few tutoring sessions     he began to flirt, a lot    

He did his best to impress you 

And eventually he just made his     move

Power couple!!!!

You still help him study

Jumin

Business major 

Not that he really needs it

He already knows all there is     to know about business so he’s top of his class

He also doesn’t really need to     study     

Wants a cat but can’t have one     in his dorm     

Also his roommate is allergic

Not that he cares all that much

Because he doesn’t have to     study, and he doesn’t belong to any clubs, his time is consumed by     meetings with his father and arguments with Zen or long chats with V 

You catch his eye when he sees     you struggling slightly in the business class

So like a gentleman he offers     his help

Spoiler: Jumin is a very bad     tutor     

Okay he’s not terrible he just     isn’t good at explaining things on a level you can understand

You appreciate the help though

He flat out asks you if you’d     like to have dinner with him    

No tip toeing around that

You accept, and after a few     more dates and a bit more horrible tutoring you two become a thing

Zen is shocked and wonders if     he’s paying you

Saeyoung

hacking major

Is there a hacking major?

Computer science & programming     major

Top of the class but rarely     shows up

When he does he’s unusually     reserved and quiet in the back of the class, not talking to anyone

Shares his dorm with his     brother and Yoosung

Eats like a true college     student

He studies but it doesn’t look     like studying

Like he’ll be on his computer,     and it will look like he’s playing a game

But he’s actually looking     through the games code    

This is also how he messes with     Yoosung

Should he hear even a peep out     of someone about Saeran in a bad way    

They can kiss their grades     goodbye

Admittedly hacked into the     schools system before in order to change Saerans grade

You meet him when you sit at     the back of class one day because all of the front spots were taken

And you realise that Saeyoung     is not quiet, or reserved, he just doesn’t have anyone to talk to

Because he doesn’t shut the     fuck up when you sit next to him    

Everything out of his mouth is     a meme or a sly comment about the professors work ethic 

Unfortunately you were     struggling a little with the class    

“Alright then smart guy,     if you know so much then teach me”

“Deal”

Well that was easy

His personality just gets     goofier every time you see him    

Eventually you just become a     thing

You both act like it wasn’t a     big deal

But it was

Now he helps you complete the     course and you listen to his stupid jokes! 

Saeran

I saw someone headcannon Saeran     as an art major

I agree

Art Major

He shows up to class a lot but     sometimes leaves during lectures 

Sometimes it’s boredom,     sometimes it’s panic attacks.    

Studies but not intensely

He doesn’t really want to     become an artist, he’s just always liked art

And he’s pretty good at it

He just had to pick a major and     art happened to be one of the first things he thought of

He shares his room with his     brother and Yoosung

He likes Yoosung, but he’s     waaaayyyy too gullible    

He also doesn’t talk to any of     Saeyoungs other friends that much, he tries though

He meets you when he sits next     to you in class one day    

Normally you’re at the back by     yourself, so your comments can go unnoticed

Not today

“Are you fucking- this is     not a hand”

“What the fuck is     Picasso”

“If I don’t eat dinners     for the next week I can afford new paints”

He looks at you strangely, you     catch his look, you smile and put your head down

He looks over to see you     writing ‘fuck colour theory’ over and over again

“I can help you with that     if you’d like”

You were surprised 

You accepted his help     nonetheless     

because

Fuck colour theory

It took some time, and patience     and a forceful push from Saeyoung    

But eventually he confessed 

Artsy couple!!

You often doodle on each     other’s arms

V

photography Major

Obviously

Studies hard, but not too hard

Wonderful student and friend to     all

Golden boy

Shares his room with Zen and     Jumin

Which can be overwhelming at     times

But they’re both very nice, to     him at least, and they do try to get along sometimes

He wouldn’t be in any clubs

He prefers going out and taking     pictures, or hanging out with Jumin    

You met through class

You were paired up for a     project together

“One will be the muse, and     the other the photographer”    

Theoretically, you should be     the muse, right?

Ohhhh no

You force kindly ask him to be     the muse for this project    

He’s too nice so he says yes

The two of you joke and laugh     the entire time     

You manage to get some lovely     shots of him smiling and laughing, when he things you aren’t taking the     picture

Sly V probably managed to     skilfully ask you on a date    

“We should do this again,     however you are to be the muse next time”

“It’s a deal”

“How about its a     date?”

Sly

He helps you with studies and     is always willing to be your muse    

Also he has a lot of pictures     of you

Cutest couple!!

Vanderwood

listen

I don’t know

I don’t fucking know what he’d     do

My headcannon, if he wasn’t     dragged into the mess of the Agency, would be he went to college to major     in psychology and chemistry    

I DONT KNOW!!!!!!! Let’s just     go with it

Psychology & Chemistry     Major!

He’s very reserved, he just     gets what he needs to done    

Doesn’t fuck around

He only really talks to     Saeyoung and sometimes Saeran, other than that he’s usually alone

A lot of people are weary of     him 

He lives in a dorm alone     because no one wanted him as a roommate because he works better alone

You met bc neither of you were     looking where you were going and you ran into each other

“Watch it” He growled     at you

Excuse me?

Excuse me??

“You watch it, you’re the     one walking around like a fucking mountain, don’t expect me to step out of     your way, asshole”    

The sass was amazing

He literally had to watch you     watch away because what the fuck just happened?? 

Of course, Murpheys Law,     Saeyoung saw all of it and teased Vanderwood for his ‘crush' 

He punched him

Gradually the two of you ran     into each other more, around campus, at the library, going in and out of     lecture rooms and hallways    

Until you just sat down next to     him in the library and asked for his help on your chemistry assignment

“You’re in my chemistry     lectures??”

“Ya have been for a year     thanks for noticing”    

It’s a slow, painful process     but the two of you become friends    

And then more…

Saeyoung prides himself on     being right about the two of you     

#mystic Messenger #mystic Messenger headcannon #mystic Messenger imagine #mystic messenger saeyoung #mystic messenger jumin #mystic messenger yoosung #mystic messenger jaehee #mystic Messenger saeran #mystic messenger Vanderwood #mystic Messenger V #mystic Messenger zen

[bbgleeproject]

[2/6/17, 10:41:50 PM] Roxy: andie and i have a showmance already [2/6/17, 10:42:01 PM] Roxy: we had    lots of  banter lol

[2/6/17, 10:51:17 PM] Roxy: lollolo [2/6/17, 10:58:27 PM] Roxy: I’ve been added to a felinenist alliance and now a menemist group lol

[2/7/17, 1:40:42 AM] Roxy: oh god I’m so fucked for this game everyone knows each other like buddys for life [2/7/17, 1:40:49 AM] Roxy: they just had like a 4 hour call and its still going lol

[2/7/17, 10:31:33 AM] Ruthie: (*) WILL YOU BE TRYING TO SHOWMANCE ANYONE THIS SEASON? (*) [2/7/17, 3:35:43 PM] Roxy: Yes. U.

[2/7/17, 11:03:34 PM] Ruthie: (*) NICHOLAS WON HOH.  HOW ARE YOU FEELING ABOUT THAT? (*) [2/7/17, 11:04:48 PM] Roxy: they do that exact  star thingy in  dreamworld smh [2/7/17, 11:05:33 PM] Roxy: use like [2/7/17, 11:05:35 PM] Roxy: (dance) [2/7/17, 11:05:48 PM] Roxy: (dance)  NICHOLAS WON HOH.  HOW ARE YOU FEELING ABOUT THAT?  (dance) [2/7/17, 11:06:02 PM] Roxy: good lol we good

[2/9/17, 10:49:08 PM] Ruthie: (*) HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT NICHOLAS WINNING POV? (*)

(*) HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE PEOPLE IN YOUR CLIQUE? (*) [2/10/17, 12:32:42 AM] Roxy: Nicholas is bae and p I my cliwueare there

[2/11/17, 6:25:30 AM] Roxy: everyone isa  prisoner [2/11/17, 6:25:37 AM] Roxy: americans  and canadians and  aussies [2/11/17, 6:25:41 AM] wolfchief1998: you are the only prisoner. [2/11/17, 6:25:49 AM] wolfchief1998: with terrible grammar. [2/11/17, 6:25:52 AM] Roxy: I’m a prisoner caasue I’m into bdsm smh [2/11/17, 6:26:00 AM] Roxy: my grammar is fine I’m just too lazy to type welll

[2/11/17, 8:15:28 AM] Roxy: And I usually theow hohs lol [2/11/17, 8:15:46 AM] Roxy: In embb3 I thre almost all of the hohs [2/11/17, 8:19:55 AM] Roxy: Lelmoo where t f ddo u even live tbh

[2/12/17, 2:08:54 AM] Roxy: LOL [2/12/17, 2:09:02 AM] Roxy: im in a weird mood [2/12/17, 2:09:03 AM] Roxy: like [2/12/17, 2:09:05 AM] Roxy: im hyperactive [2/12/17, 2:09:10 AM] Roxy: and my sexual banter [2/12/17, 2:09:11 AM] Roxy: is like [2/12/17, 2:09:13 AM] Roxy: unstoppablee!!

[2/12/17, 2:10:15 AM] Ruthie: I can tell! :P [2/12/17, 2:12:58 AM] Roxy: ;)  you wanna do more than tell? ou wanna feel? [2/12/17, 2:12:58 AM] Roxy: jks [2/12/17, 2:12:59 AM] Roxy: bye

[2/12/17, 3:06:53 PM] AshleySarah ~Glee Host~: (lips) YOU NOW HAVE MONO.  NAME WHICH HOUSEGUEST YOU WOULD LIKE TO INFECT WITH MONO. (lips)

Chrissa Elijah [2/12/17, 3:07:13 PM] moioonelmo: roxy choose wisely!! [2/12/17, 3:07:34 PM] Ruthie: GOOD LUCK <3 [2/12/17, 3:07:36 PM] moioonelmo: and ill stand by your decision! [2/12/17, 4:48:25 PM] Roxy: Lol [2/12/17, 4:48:43 PM] Roxy: Julia wants me to kiss ellijah so that  nic cpuld be nommed [2/12/17, 4:50:40 PM] AshleySarah ~Glee Host~: Is that your answer???? [2/12/17, 4:50:54 PM] Roxy: No lol [2/12/17, 4:51:02 PM] Roxy: Its my musings [2/12/17, 4:51:21 PM] AshleySarah ~Glee Host~: Let us know your final decision!!!! [2/12/17, 4:54:53 PM] Ruthie: :* [2/12/17, 4:55:57 PM] Roxy: I probably wont say till abput 11 am my time during my break [2/12/17, 4:57:37 PM] Ruthie: Let us know soon! :) [2/12/17, 5:03:34 PM] Roxy: 11 is in 2hrs lol [2/12/17, 5:05:03 PM] Ruthie: :o :o :o [2/12/17, 5:05:10 PM] moioonelmo: #pressure [2/12/17, 5:05:26 PM] Ruthie: Decisions decisions [2/12/17, 5:05:40 PM] Roxy: Lol [2/12/17, 5:06:17 PM] Roxy: If I bite elijah I hurt an ally slightly and I become a sheep of the Julia rae cult [2/12/17, 5:06:36 PM] Roxy: But if I dont bite elijah I hurt the cult and they might go aftdr me for it

[2/12/17, 5:58:27 PM] Roxy: C.p this: [2/12/17, 5:59:54 PM] Roxy: As a fujoshi (google it) I cannot kiss elijah! Id prefferto watch him kiss another guy! So I kiss chrissa cause tgeir lip looks so sensual and invoting my pussy was like bitch if u dont kids this hoe im slappi, u

[2/13/17, 12:09:41 AM] Ruthie: (lips) HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT ELIJAH WINNING HEAD OF HOUSEHOLD? (lips) [2/13/17, 12:26:37 AM] Roxy: Hungry

[2/14/17, 6:59:10 AM] Roxy: ugh coudlnt find anything [2/14/17, 6:59:55 AM] Roxy: elmo T_T [2/14/17, 7:01:20 AM] Roxy: elmo lol i joined an org about a tv show i never seen an episode of lol

[2/16/17, 8:54:05 PM] AshleySarah ~Glee Host~: (*) How do you feel about Chrissa leaving? Do you think there will be a buyback? How important is HOH? (*) [2/17/17, 12:52:26 AM] Roxy: buyback  maybe   idc much she didn’t care for me   so meh

[2/17/17, 2:12:53 AM] Roxy: i want a new one each week! [2/17/17, 2:13:02 AM] Roxy: but idk that many ppl lol [2/17/17, 8:12:51 AM] Roxy: i wanna add chris  as a guest lol [2/17/17, 8:12:57 AM] Roxy: and maybe to the guest list for main [2/17/17, 8:13:12 AM] Roxy: he isn’t very iconic but he is the leader of the survivor community we play in

[2/17/17, 9:48:22 AM] Roxy: lol [2/17/17, 9:48:39 AM] Roxy: chris i joined an org about a show i never watched and the  things are about the show and i got no clue lol [2/17/17, 9:48:47 AM] Roxy: which reminds me that imma have to abstain from hoh [2/17/17, 9:49:05 AM] Roxy: it like a challenge where you gotta  put a  video in sequence like snces from an episode of glee lol

[2/17/17, 9:49:40 AM] Roxy: lul [2/17/17, 9:49:53 AM] Roxy: i don’t even like glee lol  I’m just here for ruthie

[2/17/17, 9:00:18 PM] Ruthie: Hey, Julia, are you going to try for HOH or are you really abstaining? (lips) [2/17/17, 9:00:47 PM] Roxy: um  if this  thingy requiring me of editing the actual video? [2/17/17, 9:01:01 PM] Roxy: or can i random.org scenes? lol

[2/17/17, 11:22:13 PM] Ruthie: (lips) THERE WASN’T AN ADVANTAGE IN THE HOH RESULTS POST THIS WEEK!  DO YOU THINK ONE WILL SHOW UP OR….? (lips) [2/17/17, 11:26:55 PM] Roxy: if it does ill be unable to find it due to my lack of knowledge of   glee [2/17/17, 11:27:03 PM] Roxy: also low key if there isnt a singing comp ill cry [2/17/17, 11:27:11 PM] Roxy: and if you do it after i get evicted ill cry harder

[2/18/17, 12:41:09 PM] AshleySarah ~Glee Host~: (*) WITH SO MUCH GOING ON IN THE HOUSE WHO DO YOU KNOW YOU CAN TRUST?? WHO IS DEFINITELY NOT TRUST WORTHY??? (*) [2/18/17, 4:00:06 PM] Roxy: Ur FACE

[2/21/17, 4:13:37 PM] Roxy: Lol [2/21/17, 4:13:48 PM] Roxy: I dont like glee cause its too fake for me

[2/21/17, 9:55:31 PM] AshleySarah ~Glee Host~: (party) I’m here if  you’re ready to get punished! (party) [2/21/17, 9:55:41 PM] Ruthie: PUNISH HER ASHLEY SARAH ;) [2/21/17, 9:55:45 PM] Roxy: omg  i accepted al lthe punishments in   dreamworld lmfao [2/21/17, 9:55:47 PM] Ruthie: (party) [2/21/17, 9:55:49 PM] Roxy: lmfaooo im ready

[2/22/17, 10:54:46 AM] AshleySarah ~Glee Host~: (party) WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON SUES TAKEOVER??? (party) [2/22/17, 4:08:58 PM] Roxy: Who? [2/22/17, 4:14:00 PM] Roxy: Oh lmfao

[2/25/17, 8:00:48 PM] Roxy: kurt is my fav so far cause like he is so fationable [2/25/17, 8:00:59 PM] Roxy: fuck you guys i think I’m going to watch glee episode 1 now   after this collage [2/25/17, 8:01:00 PM] Roxy: ugh [2/25/17, 8:01:05 PM] Roxy: tbh i rememebr watchign episode 1 before [2/25/17, 8:01:08 PM] Roxy: casue i was curious [2/25/17, 8:01:10 PM] Roxy: never finished it

[2/26/17, 7:17:09 PM] Roxy: ;P [2/26/17, 7:17:14 PM] Roxy: side note i had a glee daydream today

[3/1/17, 11:12:19 PM] Roxy: loool [3/1/17, 11:12:22 PM] Roxy: try to save yourself:: [3/1/17, 11:12:27 PM] Roxy: this is how i tried to save myself [3/1/17, 11:12:36 PM] Roxy: [2/03/2017 2:15:02 pm] Roxyearl (EMVivor Host): 2017-02-25, 1:00:39 AM] zach: if you use the veto [2017-02-25, 1:00:40 AM] zach: sydneys going up [2017-02-25, 1:00:41 AM] zach: ive decided . [2017-02-25, 1:01:00 AM] julia rae: why wont u put up roxy [2/03/2017 2:15:04 pm] Roxyearl (EMVivor Host): tea? [2/03/2017 2:55:59 pm] julia rae: i don't know why it's just me when literally it was other people's idea [3/1/17, 11:13:13 PM] Roxy: [2/03/2017 1:50:02 pm] nicholas: yeah but you shouldn’t assume you were safe [2/03/2017 1:50:06 pm] nicholas: week 1 i had to come to you [2/03/2017 1:50:13 pm] nicholas: when i was hoh [2/03/2017 1:50:38 pm] Roxyearl (EMVivor Host): sorry i just assumed you wouldn’t be foolish enough to nom me cause its such a useless move [2/03/2017 1:50:49 pm] Roxyearl (EMVivor Host): and i never  had it going for you  so  you’ve had no reason to either [2/03/2017 1:51:10 pm] Roxyearl (EMVivor Host): and  the one person you thought i was working with bussed me so idk why you’d wnana believe what he said PLUS he nonmed me [2/03/2017 1:51:42 pm] Roxyearl (EMVivor Host): pluses its pretty  obvious how bad my social game is in glee bb [2/03/2017 1:52:00 pm] Roxyearl (EMVivor Host): so  i assumed u wouldn’t be  foolish enough to waste your hoh like that [3/1/17, 11:13:24 PM] Roxy: XD this is my tryna save myself [3/1/17, 11:13:25 PM] Roxy: kekek

[3/1/17, 11:26:50 PM] Roxy: rather [3/1/17, 11:26:53 PM] Roxy: there were 4 noms [3/1/17, 11:26:54 PM] Roxy: *Are [3/1/17, 11:27:08 PM] Roxy: and 1 is a target of a majority  pre made in this game [3/1/17, 11:27:22 PM] Roxy: so ill be safe if  he doesn’t win pov

[3/3/17, 6:13:22 PM] Roxy: Yes lolits a buyback now [3/3/17, 6:13:29 PM] Roxy: It was 3-3 [3/3/17, 6:13:34 PM] nightoned: ouch [3/3/17, 6:13:41 PM] Roxy: And that hoe nicholas voted me out the hoh

[kimthwariru]

Muse

Genre: Smut, fluff, angst (it will contain smut in the next parts)

a/n: The story will have another part. So dont worry, im not cutting you off

Description:Jungkook is a  photography major in collaage. Every girl likes him yet he only has eyes for his camera, until he -even tho he hasnt realized it yet-  finds his muse.

Part1 Part 2  Part3

His lenses searching and capturing the park. Click click click. Taking pictures of random people passing by along with trees. What a beautiful day it was. Sunny but not too sunny so the sun would blind you. Just sunny enough to provide you with great lighting.

 A girl hits him accidentally resulting in a blurry shaky image. He sights and looks at the girl who has an apologetic look. Whatever. He continues taking pictures. That’s all the interaction he has with girls now. Since he got in to photography major he doesn’t give a shit anymore. His friends set him up with girls at parties but all he’d do was maybe fuck them and then never call them again. He didn’t enjoy one night stands but he didn’t have the time to be in a relationship. But it’s okay because his camera is all he needs. After college maybe but right now a serious relationship means absolutely nothing to him. He liked booking girls for photo shoots. You know your usual 21 model wannabe would sometimes do it for free if he was willing to fuck her. He was good looking -very good looking- and the talk in the girls’ bathroom. His work was amazing and some of his best pieces where hanged in the local gallery. So a girl whose dream was to be a model was more than willing to pose for him. But that’s all they did. They were never muses. They were just girls that  with good enough lighting and accessories could  make  a very nice picture for his projects.

 He scans the scene with his camera passing through some pretty interesting faces along the way. But not interesting enough for what he wanted to do this time. Because this time he wants someone that will inspire him as well. This is a big deal. It is a big project that will be judged by the best photographers around the world. It’s a competition.In the beginning he never actually though he could find someone like that. But he will not give up already. He will search a little more and if he doesn’t find someone that clicks to him he will just go back to another pretty face. Just pretty, not beautiful.

 But then, as the camera is moving through the area it suddenly stops, on that one face. Wow, he thought. She looked like an Ancient Greek goddess. She was pure. Everything about her screamed ‘hey I’m the most delicate thing on this planet but I can make you believe I have a dark side’. She wasn’t from here. He could tell. The way girls act here is nothing like how she acted. Not full of herself. Smiling truthfully at a joke her friend just told her. She’s perfect. -for the project- 

He slowly goes up to her group of friends

 "Hey"  he says  looking at her and only her 

 "Hey, can I help you?“ She says. Her voice is angelic.

 "Actually, yes” he pauses only to look at her confused face

 " could I have a minute with you?“ She nods while looking at her friends.

 "Hey, Im jeon Jungkook" 

 "I’m Y/N, Jeon jungkook? Why does that sound familiar?”

 "Are you into photography? You might have seen some of my work" 

“Oh you made that thing with the girl and the ropes. Now I remember. I fell in love with that photo.”

 Weird. That piece was the one that took the most criticism out of his works. People didn’t like it and it was considered one of his ‘bad works’  but not because it was bad, but because people didn’t get it. It was a naked ginger haired girl with perfect makeup on and only ropes covering her private areas. She was a drama major so her expression was just perfect and exactly what Jungkook wanted. A happy yet sad face. The picture meant to deliver  the contrast between the outside and the inside world of a person. But people thought it was just pointless.  

So yes jungkook in a way was surprised that she liked it, actually, fell in love with it. 

 "Really?“

 She tilted her head a little and frowned her eyebrows “Yeah, I mean, don’t you get that a lot?”

 He smiled “not with this picture”

 "Wait really? Why?“ 

 "People didn’t like it as much. They didn’t get it”

 "Well that’s too bad, even thought I think it’s pretty obvious what you tried to do there. And it is really a problem that bothers so many people. They way we look and the way we feel. The way we act and they way we sensirly want to act.“

 He smiles. She gets it. He is glad she gets it. - maybe too glad- 

 "Anyway, what did you want to tell me?“ 

 "I want you to model for me.“ 

 Wow she didn’t see that coming. Model for someone? Why would anyone want her to model for them? She wasn’t a model, but then again she remembered jungkook’s work and  how he doesn’t want to capture just a supermodel posing for him but send a message through his work.  She’s not a model but he gets that she has the potential to deliver his message through her expressions. She’s glad he gets that.-maybe too glad- 

 "This is for real right?” She asks

 "Of course it is" 

 "Yes. I would love to model for you Jungkook" 

 "That’s great. But we can’t discuss all the details right now. Should I call you? Maybe meet up somewhere?“

 "Oh I can type you in my number”

 He gives her his phone to do just that. He may or may not admire how good she looks and stares at her a little bit while she’s not looking. God damn these lips of her-

 "Here” she suddenly looks up and gives him his phone making Jungkook snap out of his thoughts. “Call me and we could discuss this, but I’m sorry now. I need to go.” She pauses and looks back at her group of friends that look kind of angry “they will hate me if I stand here with you any longer, Jennie broke up with her boyfriend so every guy today is an enemy” she laughs.

 He laughs too “You know, you could slap me, if that makes the situation any better" 

 She looks at him not saying a word. Then she slaps him. “Jerk” she yells and mouths a ‘thank you’ as she runs back to her friends that are now smirking. 

 Wow what a girl. 

 It’s 10 and jungkook is debating on weather he should call her or not. He finally does. Oh god what will he even say? Oh right. Project. Focus Jungkook.

 "Hello?“ She says and he might - just might- like her voice. Even tho he has already heard it. 

 "Uh Hey Y/N, its jungkook" 

 "Oh right. Hey how are you?”

 "I’m good, I hope I didn’t wake you up? Were you about to go to sleep? I will hang up if-“

 "I’m 21 now mum. It’s fine” she chuckles and Jungkook’s chicks are now red.

 ” So,about the project. Name your price” Jungkook didn’t want to fuck her. No, he didn’t. He wanted to pay her fair and square. Not make her a whore.

 "Well it depends. What will you need me to do?“ And that’s exactly why Jungkook is so anxious. Because the thing he wants her to do. He would be fine asking any other girl. But he didn’t even fucking know what was stopping him to ask her. Was she too pure for him?

 "Well I don’t know if you’ll like it.” He pauses “I will need you to be nude”

 There is a silence. Jungkook hopes she will not hang up. Because deep inside he wanted her to do this so much. Not the photo shoot in general. But what she had to do at the photo shoot.

 "500” she says all of a sudden.

 "So-so you’re going to do it?

 "Did I just named a price for nothing?“

 "Thanks for doing this.“ 

 "What is this project for?”

 "A competition. A very big one”

 "You’re making me nervous.“

 He chuckles. “You shouldn’t be. Anyway. Thanks again, can you come Friday night? I know that Friday night is hard because of parties and stuff but that’s the only day where-”

 "Okay, I’ll be at your house around 7. Where do you live again?“

 "X street X number”

 "Alright. See you later, jungkook”

 "Goodbye"

 God that went better than he expected. She made it go better. She seems cool. But only as a model. Jungkook doesn’t see her in any other way. He doesn’t, really. He doesn’t have time for that crap. She’s just nice to work with. Really nice.  

Jungkook wakes up around 12. Coffee is the first thing he needs right when he gets out of bed. He sips the black bitter liquid that warms his throat. He thinks that today he’s going to start with the photo shoot. She’s gonna come over at 7. Suddenly Jungkook is happy. It’s not because of her. No, that’s defenetly not it. He lets himself think that the coffee just made him happy. It was a good coffee so it would be a good day. Defently not because of her.

 He watches as 7:05 hits the clock. Not that he was watching the time or anything, he just didn’t want her to be late, that would be unprofessional. Suddenly a bell sound fills his ears. He’s not exited, at all. He opens the door 

“Hey” he says

 "Hey" 

“Do you want something to drink?“ 

“No I’m fine thanks" 

 "Are you sure?“ 

"Very sure yeah”

 "Well then,the studio is this way” he leads the way towards the room. 

 It’s a huge room. Well it is a huge house after all. She wandered how he, a collage student, could afford all that. But then she remembered she was being a creep  the other night and googled him. His parents are super rich. They could buy you, sell you and then rebuy you like you were nothing. They were not people you wanted to mess with. And why would you in the first place? The studio looks nice. Well organized. Photos covering the walls and the carpet bringing the whole room together. The lighting was also amazing and she could see how his eyes were making use of that light.

 Was she anxious about getting naked in front  of him? Should she? I mean she is here as a model and the whole nudity thing only happens for art solely. Why would she be? It would only make sense if she thought of him as more than a photographer wich she didn’t. She really didn’t. She didn’t like him or anything. 

“So the background is going to be plane for this photo because I want everyone to look at you and focus to you only” his words flustered her. Why did they? He is a photographer and she is his model. That’s all there is into this.

 He on the other hand tried very hard not to crack his voice while saying that sentence  to her because reasons.

 "You can go change now” he points to a door. 

 As she is getting out of her clothes she looks at her bare self on the mirror. She’s glad she didn’t ate that cheesecake yesterday. Why didn’t she? Well she doesn’t really know, but it’s defenetly not because she wanted to look good in front of him.

 As she comes out he tries to control his eyes.-very fucking hard-. Why can’t he feel his legs? Why is he ever reacting like this? She’s not special, for god shakes he just met her. Her beauty was overwhelming that made him tingle. Oh wait no it didn’t. Why would it? 

 "So what should I do?“

 "There will be no accessories in this one. Your expressions are your accessories. I want you to be pure while being naked. Be angelic.” Not that you aren’t already.

 And she did just that. He couldn’t believe it through his lenses that he sometimes took his camera out of his eyes so he could see the real thing. And that didn’t happen often. It almost never did. But he couldn’t help it. She was bare naked yet it looked like she was wearing a turtleneck. The way this girl looks. The way she acts… she’s  so uniq,  she’s  so dreamy that it almost makes you- 

 He snaps back to reality as he sees her looking at him with a confused look.

“Is everything okay?” She says 

 "Yes, yes everything is fine” You are fine, you are the finest figure he has ever seen. 

The photo shoot ends. She’s about to leave but he doesn’t feel like it. 

 "Hey can I ask something?“ He says

 "Sure what is it?”

 "Well I was kind of wondering, and I hope I’m not crossing any lines here, but do you want to have coffee with me sometime?“

 "You? Coffee? I heard you don’t do dates” she looks at him with this  'I know you only fuck’ look and it triggeres something inside of him. Like she totaly turned him into another person whose only purpose right now was to take that look away and replace it with ‘I only fuck but i do it very good and rought’ look.

 "How do you even know that?“ He smirks

 "Word spreads around quickly" 

 "Oh it does?” He pulls her closer still smirking.  He notices her eyes and her lips again. Lips that would look great around his length. Does he really want her? Or is she another one of those girls that when he gets  enough of he would eventually get tired of? She doesn’t feel like that, but he wants her. Finally owing up to it. He wants her. But it’s a childish want. It’s nothing serious. He just wants her right now,not tomorrow -maybe-

 Will she really do it? Is she like that? Every girl talks about him. But that just make her want him less. The fact that every slut had a piece of him makes her sick. But still, he has this thing, it’s kind of the way he looks at you that makes you weak -well at least her-. 

“Yes it does, you should pay attention on who you fuck.”

 "Starting today" he suddenly kisses her not letting her respond.

#jeon jungkook #jungkook fanfic #jungkook fluff #jungkook smut #jungkook angst #jungkook au #bts smut #bts fluff #bts scenarios #jungkook scenarios #bts fanfic

[cami1822]

The 4am shift was always Jays favourite shift at tastebuds, the cute cafe that none of the so called ‘cool’ people went to when there was a Starbucks. It was a open and airy cafe, with floor to ceiling windows at the front of the building, and worn, wood panels on the rest of the walls. Fairy lights were strung along one wall and pictures were tangled in the string lights, just pictures of frequent costomers and the cafe throughout its years. Retro lightbulbs hung from the ceiling, scattered throughout the rest of the cafe. The chalk boards behind the counter were brand new because the others had gotten used so frequently that the dust had become one with the boards. Jay always had loved the cafe ever since she came here as a kid with her grandma for afternoon tea.  She loved the squashy arm chairs and the dark wooden tables.  She loved the small, vertical garden near the entrance, and eating the mint leaves off of it. She loved that it could be airy in the summer and cozy in the winter without anything changing.  Jay loved the oversized chipped mugs and the extra nutmeg that she always found in her coffee. Now, at 17 she could finally work here. Her favourite spot was in the corner by the window, with the vertical garden behind her and the window beside her, so she could see everything and the plants tickled the back of her neck. Beside the garden was a bookshelf. it wasn’t that big, but big enough that it took her a year and a half to finally get though. Jay was behind the counter, adding ‘hot chocolate’ in stick like writing to the chalkboard since the weather had reached its mid point in autumn when she stepped back and knocked a mug off of the edge of the sink. She swatted at it in mid air twice until it finally slipped from her clumsy grasp and hit the birch floor with a ‘plonk’, thankfully not smashing. She groaned in relief, and clasped its handle with her pinkie, scooping it up and into the sink.  No one was in the cafe ever at 4am and thats why she liked it the most. She could sit in her corner with a good book, and a free coffee, and she got paid for it.  Usually it was quiet like that until 6 to 6:30, when the first early risers trudged in, folding their collars back down and whisking off toques.  Jay also loved to watch the sunrise, she loved to watch it set the cafe of fire like everything was glowing a soft golden. The sunrise was always perfect because the the cafe windows faced directly towards it, and the small brick cones across the street were short so it didnt block the sun. At this time in the year the sun rose at around 5:45 which gave Jay lots of time for her to read in her favourite light setting.  She never flicked on the main lights until 6, instead turning on the fairy lights and basking in the soft glow of them with a book and blanket. ‘This stuff sounds stupid’. Jay always thought to her self whenever she did this, or dwelled upon the fact that she count be more content in the moments she spent in the cafe at that time. But Jay always felt like the cafe was her own little palace.  She felt like the cafe was a book, and every time she was in it, she was rereading it and finding tiny bits of information she had missed before, and rereading her favourite parts. No one could read the book like she could, maybe because sometimes she felt like she wrote it. Jay had hopped onto the counter and was obsorbed in a new book she had just gotten when she heard the heavy door being pushed open, a the dented christmas bell tinkle.  Jay spun around, a little too fast, loosing her balance and almost falling off of the counter.  Once she had composed herself again she looked up to see a tall lanky guy with chattering teeth and big black frammed classes sliding down a thin nose. His hands were deep in his pockets and he was trying to smile sheepishly thought his noisy teeth.  I raised my eyebrows, and nodded to the chalk board. “I just added hot chocolate to the menu, want some?” She asked. He nodded and bit his lip to stop the chattering. “More like need some, thanks.” Jay slipped off the counter and started to make the hot coco. “So, why are you here at 4 in the morning?” She asked, heating up milk. “same reason you are.” He seated himself in Jays corner after a carful selection, and jay didnt know weather to be proud of irritated. “To make money?” Jay smiled. He studdied her for a minute before replying. “Well no, im here to, to be _here.” _Jay raised her eyebrows again and started to shake to can of whipped cream. “Obviously, someone our age would not work to 4am shift here unless they really wanted to.” Thats when Jay realized that he was around the same age as her, and also not wearing any jackted but a too big worn out hoodie. “And how do you know I wasn’t a fill in for someone else?” I asked him another question. “Because if you were you wouldn’t have asked me why I was here genuinely unless you were checking me out, which you weren't.” Jay could tell she had an amused look on her face and the guy smiled at her when she sat the steamy mug down in front of him. “Whats you're-” “Sawyer” He cut me off with a grin (the chattering had stopped) “I swear im not this cocky all the time.” I laughed slightly and sat down in the chair across from him. “Nah I can tell, your a real teddy bear inside aren't you sawyer.” Sawyer grimaced slightly, scrunching up his nose. “I wouldnt go that far.” “awe you just proved it.” Jay bit her lip and watched as he shook tiny water droplets out of his dark hair. “You're not the only one who can read people.” She smiled as he tilted his head to the side and raised an eyebrow. “So give me a reason why you're here, of why you want to be here.”  Sawyer licked his lips and curled his fingers around the mug taking a sip. “Wow this is good! what did you put in it? Was it-” “Nutmeg.” she finished. “It tastes like Christmas.” He beamed down at the drink. Jay laughed and shook her head slightly. “Thats the point. You still haven't given me a reason.” “Why can't a guy just go to a nice cafe without getting questioned about it?”  He asked taking another sip and peering at Jay over the brim of his mug. “because you're right, no one our age wants to be up at this time at night, unless theyre at a party.” He sighed into his hot coco, sending rippled across the surface. “You are not going to give up on this are you.” Jay shook her head slightly and looked down at her lap surprised to see that she had brought her book over without even realising it. She traced the new spine with her index finger waiting for Sawyer to say something. She had started to space out when sawyer gasped. “What?” Jays voice was slightly scratchy because of the lack of use and alarmed tone. “That. Is my favourite book.” He was looking at it hungrily, with his lip between his teeth and hands tight around his mug. “Jules Vern hey?” Jay asked thankful that he appreciated it. “Journey to the centre of the earth. Its genius. I love it.” He grinned up at jay half of his face in the shadows becuase of the fairy lights. He looked like a mad man. “Just got it yesterday for the shelf.” Jay pointed over to the bookshelf and sawyer got up, still sipping on his drink to look at it. “You like reading?” Sawyer asked, running his hands along the spines of the books. “I love it.  Mostly just fantasy and sci-fi, but I like a good horror book to.” “Huh. It sucks, books are going out of fashion, and people just don't like them anymore when you can watch tv.” “I know, barely any of my friends read and whenever I pull out a book they dont seem to get it.  They always ask me why I read for fun...” Jay trailed off and gazed out the window, tucking her feet underneath her. When she looked back sawyer was sitting back in his chair squinting at her. “The reason im here is because I was at a party. My friend dragged me out and I was there til about one just reading with the cat curled up on my lap. I got kicked out by some drunk collage student. He actually kicked me.” Sawyer rolled up his jeans to reveal a deep gnash on his shin, and Jay scrunched up her nose and went to get the first aid kit (it was usually there for herself when she smashed a glass and cut herself, but there was always that one customer). “I dont think he meant to but he said I was ‘to much of a boring character’ to be at a party, so I left. My friend was still at the party, already drunk so I started to walk home, but...I kind of got lost.  Anyway I found my way back into town and I realized id never been to this part of it, with the cobble streets and alleyways, you know what im talking about right?” Jay nodded. “Well I walked around here for like 2 hours and its so beautiful. I can't believe I've never been here.  It looks like Rome almost. Everything was just quiet and I was the only one out. I dont know, its weird to see a town that is usually really busy all quiet and dark. SO now im here. Does that answer your question?” “So you’ve never been to the older part of town?” Jay questioned, awestruck. “Nope.” “Well I can tell you one thing, its way cooler then the new parts with the big buildings and tall condos.  Also the people are more fun here, no offence, but you must be filthy rich to have never been here.”  Jay spoke a tiny bit louder then she had before, unzipped the first aid kit at the table. Sawyer had an amused smile on his face and tried not to laugh. “Actually, I just moved here 3 months ago, and we are probably living in one of the worst apartments in town.” “Oh. Shit.” Jay whispered. “sorry about that whole thing, ive kinda had bad experiences with the richer people...” “but....” Sawyer edged her on. “My grandma just recently died, and she had a lot more money then she should have living down here. I inherited it all, so I guess I can't really be talked.” Jay spilled some peroxide on sawyers cut and he hissed. “Oh hush you’re fine.” Jay rolled her eyes. “Im sorry about your grandma, you were close?” Jay nodded, and started to gingerly wrap gauze around his leg. The two were quiet as she finished up. “You didnt have to do that.” Sawyer said in a low voice. “Actually, if a customer has an open wound in the shop, I have to clean he or she up because it is not sanitary for the food and it could disturb other customers.” Jay smiled slyly as she went to put away the kit. “Oh so im not special then.” Sawyer mumbled with false disapointment laced in his voice. “Nah its just the rules I'm following.  You want some more?” Jay pointed to the empty mug and had already started to make it before he could answer. Sawyer got up and leaned against the counter with a sleepy smile plastered on his face. “Do you always work this shift?” “Nah just when I dont have school the next day.” Jay Handed him another cup and started to make one for herself. “So what books do you like?” She asked, tucking a strand of hair that came loose from her pony tail behind her ear. “Science fiction all the way. I guess I read some fantasy, but for the science aspect of it.” “Do ya like Harry Potter or lord of the rings at all?” “I mean ive read all of them but none of them could be real, so theyre not my favourite.” “Then why do you read books?” “What?” He tilted his head to the left. “People usually read books to escape, or to travel into a different reality. If you dont like books that can't be real, why do you read?” “For knowledge.  I read to know things. To learn new things, but I guess your right in a way. I mean yeah, thats part of it.  I guess I never thought of it that way but now...” He trailed off and looked slightly confused. “I think thats exactly why I read. I always do it when im stressed or upset.” His eyes were wide and he had a half smile on his face. “well now I feel stupid.” Sawyer muttered looking down at his hot coco a smal lsmile still in place. Jay laughed. “Dont, you’re not the one who works the night shifts just because you like it here more then your own home.” “Tough home life?” Sawyer looked up “Yes. No. Not really sometimes its great sometimes its not. I just like it here.  Especially when its quiet.”  Sawyer nodded, licking whipped cream off of his finger. “Is this your music?” He jerked his head up, indicating to the soft jazz music sounded from them.  Jay blushed and bit her lip. “Yeah, I don’t usually listen to jazz, but I made a playlist for the cafe. I dont know I thought it was nice.” “Its great actually, you have nice taste in jazz.” “Ha. Thanks most people don’t appreciate how much better it can make a room feel, music I mean.”  Jay let them back over to her corner, this time taking her seat back, forcing him to raise his eye brows and sit in the seat across from her. “Sawyer there is something you should know.” All of a sudden Jays face went very serious and sawyers smile slid off his face. “This seat right here, with the mint behind me and the window beside me, this is my seat.” Jay grinned and plucked a mint leaf off of the garden wall, and slipped it into her mouth. Sawyer started to laugh but was cut off suddenly by a blinding light. “Whoa...” Sawyer shielded his eyes and looked out the window to see the marvellous sunrise taking action.  Jay closed her eyes and let the warm glow wash over her like she had swum up to the top of the ocean and had broken its subtle surface for the first time.  Sawyer lowered his arm and blinked a few times. Everything had turned golden in the cafe, and he watched the dust particles dance in the sunbeams. He wondered briefly why the sun didnt always cast this glow on everything. He looked at Jay, who still had her eyes closed, and started to grin stupidly. Jay opened her eyes a moment later, to see sawyer staring at her. “What?  Whats wrong?” “Are you bliss?” He asked drunkly, with a ridiculous smile. Jay scrunched up her face and chucked the balled up napkin she had at him. He tried to duck but it ended up hitting him in the forehead and falling into the last of his hot coco. “Shut up.” She muttered. “You really love it here.” “Yeah, its like my panic room.  I have everything I will ever need right here.” “Hey I still don’t know your name.” He pipped. “Oh yeah, its Jay.” “Nice to meet you Jay.” “You too sawyer.” “Whats with the mint leaves?” Sawyer asked stoping her halfway from slipping another into her mouth. “try one.” She passed him the leaf and he raised his eyebrows in uncertainty. Jay rolled her eyes.”Just do it you wimp its a leaf, its not gonna bite you back.” Sawyer glared at her but couldnt keep a smiled from coming across his face. “It tastes sweeter then I thought.” He said after eating it. “Thats because I grow them, and I grow them with amazing talent and spectacular care.” This time sawyer rolled his eyes. “Does that mean you like to cook too?” He asked. Jay started to giggle. “If i ever try to cook anything but grilled cheese again, I will definitely burn the town down.  Plus its grimy, you have to clean after, even  if you dont even make it to the final product because you keep eating the ingredients separately.Its a waste of my time.” Sawyer laughed but then put n a fake face of seriousness. “Cooking is a science.Baking is an even better science.  I can't believe you, you make drinks right? You should love it.” “Drinks are different. I know exactly what everyone likes by just the way they say hello, even if I dont know them. Drinks are someones personality.  Food is just food.” “I bet I could change your mind on that.” Sawyer muttered slightly distracted. “And hows that?” “I could cook you a meal at my house say 7ish?” Sawyer didnt really know what he was saying, but when he realized it, his eyes widened and he whipped around to see Jay looking at him with a half smile on her face and her head tilted to the side.  She had pulled her legs up criss cross and her strawberry red hair was coming out of her pony tail at the front and framing her face perfectly (It was just grown out of bangs). Sawyer licked his lips nervously. Jay let out a short breathy laugh and then leaned forward, tugging sawyer towards her by the neck of his hoodie. She pressed her lips against his softly,  they were chapped and tasted of mint and chocolate and sawyer melted into her, reaching up to touch her chin just slightly. He had closed his eyes leaning in, and he opened them just halfway, to look at her freckles and her closed eyes through his glasses. He smiled on her lips and so did she. Thats when he heard a word Christmas bell go and the gruff huffs of a man. “What does a guy have to do to get a drink around here?” The man asked. Jay fell out of her seat. She clumsy stood up, flushed, and then bent down  to whisper ‘triple shot americano with whipped cream’ into his ear. For a minute he was confused. “morning sir what can I get you today?” Sawyer turned around to watch Jay serve the man. “So you're the barista here? Maybe you should be waiting tables instead of making out with your boyfriend.” Sawyer looked around at the spotless tables and empty chairs, enternally screaming. “Im very sorry I will keep that in mind.” Jay still had a smile fixed on her face. “Ill get a triple shot americano with whip.” Sawyers jaw dropped and Jay grinned to herself as she started to make the drink. A few moments later Jay passed the man his drink as he payed but the man didn't move. “Are-are those rainbow sprinkles?” He stuttered, his eyes flipped from the drink to Jay. “Yup, just a touch I thought id add.” All of a sudden the mans face split into a toothy grin. “Thank you miss.” He croaked. “Have a nice day sir.” She smiled again. And the man put a 5 dollar bill in the tip jar. Once he left, Jay sat back down with sawyer. “Thats how its done Sawyer. I earn money by making peoples day and its a talent few have.”  Jay had a smitten air around her and sawyer grinned. This time sawyer pulled her in for a kiss, and she let out a gasp of surprise. Then he scribbled down his address on a napkin, paid for his drinks, and put 6 dollars in the tip jar, just to one up the man. “You didnt really just do that. Tell me, I'm not going to date a guy who is that petty.” Jay crossed her arms. “Shut up Jay I'm a big teddy bear inside.” And with that sawyer left the cafe and Jay, who had never felt like her own little panic room could do anything more for her. *** a lot of spelling errors and run on sentences but hey, to my 2 followers out there what did you think

[1a-little-obsessed1-blog]

School with the MAGCON boys pt 1

hey im Zahra. im 15 born and brought up in London, England. my father travels alot for work which means i have to go with him, my mother isnt here with me anymore she died while giving birth to me but ive learnt to stop thinking bout her as much...im proud of my father, although i may have been an accident he doesn't treat me like one, he treats me amazingly he’s been there for me through thick and thin, hes taught me so much and when we’re traveling from country to country ive been enrolled in so many classes, including self defense classes to help myself become a stronger female as a whole. I have the grades of a high level collage students so im basically never behind on my studies. my father had me at age 17 with my mum who was 16 at the time, they had the most beautiful love story yet so real, my father a man of his word, a gentleman he charmed my mother and they had me. after i was born my father didnt know what to do so i lived with my grandparents most of my life seeing my father come home from school tired but he always smiled when he saw me.

more on school. I was moving to a highschool in Chicago,i was looking forward to it but i felt that i would be very left out, i was the dork. my hair was black, long, thick and wavy with a few red highlights, my eyes were dark and my lashes were long. i had a very petite body, tiny waist and small hips. i was a decent height only 5′7ft  one could cal me innocent and i agree its ture heck i haven't even had my first kiss yet!

the school i went to was more of a local school with the usual crownds from what i could tell. There were the Jocks, popular bitchy girls, the nerds, emo’s and the “freaks”. i walk in with my Dad i wore blue jeans, a white top, bomber jacket, white vans, a small hand bag and my huge geeky glasses. i didnt wear much make up just a bit of eyeliner and highlighter. We were given a tour of the school, it wasnt that big but i knew i was still gonna get lost.

i get to my first lesson late. as always. I knock on the door and enter. “oh, and who must you be sweetie?” said the teacher at the front. 

“hello, im Zahra im new here.” i say, my British accent standing out.

“ok hunny! go have a seat and ill be right with you im Miss Dina,”

I Nod and take a seat at the back. that was the only available seat. i adjust my glasses and get a pen, pencil and ruler out of my bag. i look around realizing there were a few familiar faces. That’s when it hit me, i realized there were a few viners here, Matthew Espinosa, Jack J and Shawn Mendes. i look to my left and  felt a tingly sensation in my stomach as i took a closer look at who sat right beside me. Nash Grier. OMFG i felt really shy but then i snapped out of my shock and returned to what the teacher was saying.”Now Class who can Name the three enzymes needed for digestion along with their uses?”

my hand shot right up in the air without me thinking. “Yes Zahra?”

“the first enzyme is Carbohydrase this breaks down starch and sugar, the second is  Protease this breaks down proteins and lastly is lipase this breaks downs Fats and Lipids.”

“Excellent!”

i felt everyone’s eyes piercing at me i could feel my face slowly becoming a tomato. i felt really panicky and queasy, my panic attacks were bad but i didnt need one now of all times, ive barley been in the classroom 20 mins. i started to lower my adrenaline levels and i slowly returned to my normal state. I was given an exercise book to write in but i didnt need it. my grades were amazing and i already knew all of this. but i still wrote as much as i could. it was about 5 mins until the lesson was over so i started packing my things up.i  reaching my bag and looked at my planner, it was a small planner but it was sentimental to me it had pictures of me and my classmates in France, Germany, Beijing and Poland. I missed them but i cant get attached to people too quickly. its not good for me at all. I flip through the pages to see if i had any empty time slots that’s when  i saw a particular name pop up (my dad writes stuff in here to keep me on track) says the Jhonson family are coming for a meeting. i mean it was cool but i was praying that it wasn’t the family of the person who i think it is. I her my pencil drop on the floor and i lean under the table to look for it. “uh.. here.” i look up and Nash was holding the pencil. i take it from him and put it in my bag. “Thanks...”

“So your british?”

“yeah. well i havn’t seen London in 6 years...” I reply.

“ what do you mean?” he asked me.

“I Travel alot, so i go to a few different schools in different countries, but im usually home schooled if my dad is free.”

the bell rings and our class was dismissed. I head out of the classroom and start walking through the hallway, i see a crowd of guys. i push through them minding my own business before i hear a few murmers. “Thats the new chick!” another voice said “Damn she looks finee” i hear another say “She’s probably a hoe” i feel anger build up inside me waiting to be released. but i just keep walking faster and faster. 

----Later----

It’s lunch time and im alone. So much for being socially awkward. I had a lunch packed in my bag, Salad and water along with a small can of pringles. i look for somewhere to sit but everywhere was taken... i felt like shit but then again Having no one to leave is better than having a ton of friends who ill have to say goodbye to. I feel a light tap on my shoulder i turn around and see a girl she looked a little older than me but definitely around 16 or 17. she had curly hair and freckles.”Hey! I haven’t seen you around are you new..?” she says with a bit of cheer in her voice. “Why yes im Zahra, and you are?” i ask her. “My name is Mahogany LOX im 16 you ca Call me LOX, your accent is adorable!!”she squeals. “Thanks...” i say. “come sit with me and Shawn.” 

I followed her to a table where she sat down next to Shawn. she introduced me to him and we all were like bestfriends.. the vibes they were giving out were so warm and positive. I talked to them about life and school and about who i am and what i like to do. i felt like i could talk to them for hours. We ended up swapping numbers at the end of lunch. my last lesson of the day was calculus which meant more stuff i already knew. 

----end of the day----

it seemed like Mahogany and Shawn got along with everyone but i seemed to be the awkward one. i was walking out to the parking lot of the school when im approached by Jack G. “Hello there...” 

“Uh.. hi?” i say

“So you wanna met up some time late and go to my place?” he says with an arrogant tone.

“Sorry im not Netflix and chill sessions and by the way i dont think im gonna let you into my pants that quickly.” I say.

he attempts to put his arms aroung my waist before my fighting instincts kick in and i grab his hand and twist it. he   shrieked in pain and moved aside.

“So i see your playing hard to get...” he says with a little bit of annoyance in his voice.

“No i just dont fall for fuckboys like you.” i walk to my bike and cycle home.

i get home and put my helmet on a little table by the front door. “PaPa are you home?!” i shout across the house.

“im in the kitchen hunny! go put something nice on we have guests coming over!” My dad says.

“Ok dad but promise me you wont bring up anything to do with my grades” i say.

“how can  i not when i have such an amazing daugher?” he asks.

“whatever dad im going upstairs see ya in 5 mins”

i run up to my room and look through my cupboard. i choose a pastel blue dress with a pair of black tights and i put my hair up in a pony tail leaving my fringe out.. i run downstairs and join my dadin the kitchen. i sit on a chair and watch him cook. “so how was your first day?” he asks.

“a bit awkward at first but actually pretty good. and i made two friends.” i say with a little grin on my face.

“Any boys?” he asks with a bit of sarcasm in his tone.

“Dad if there were i would’ve told you, but as i said for the millionth time, guys aren’t into me im ugly.” my cheer went down and he turned around and hugged me.

“my beautiful girl is growing up thinking she’s ugly? im a terrible father!!!”

“No papa your an amazing dad!”

“My baby girl is growing up... i will always love you. you look just like your mother. you know that right?” i see his eyes glisten with tears.

“I know dad... i know. now dont cry otherwise im gonna get emotional!” i say trying to put a little bit of humor into the situation.

“Well i thnk ive passed on the wrong genes. have fun dealing with being an emotional wreck.” i see him smiling and i giggle.

the door bell rings and i run to answer the door and i see a woman with a smile on her face standing there holding the hand of who i presume was her husband, and right there i saw...Jack.

“Mr and Mrs Jhonson?” i plastered a fake smile and shook their hands. my dad came from no where and escorted them to the dining room. I walk tot the dining room and get my phone out before my dad starts speaking. “This is my daughter Zahra shes just been enrolled iin our local Highschool.”

“She’s in my biology class” Says Jack. 

i look up and look back down at my phone and start texting Mahogany.but no reply. i go up to my room and sit downon the windowsill as i watch the clouds slowly shift out of sight. i sit there for about 20 min until i hear knocking on the door.i walk over to the door and open it. “Hey..” jack said leaning on the door frame. 

“What do you want?” i say slightly annoyed.

“just wanna chill...” he says trying to act cool.

“Well i have better things to do and besides do you really wanna end up like your friend or worse?” i say slamming the door.

---- 2 hours later ----

Finally they’re gone and now i can return to my normal life. i get ready for bed and put on my “more revealing” night wear on. i fall asleep at 9:30 setting alarm for 6:30.

#nash grier #cameron dallas #jack gilinsky #jack johnson #mahogany lox #matthew espinosa #carter reynolds #taylor caniff #hayes grier #shawn mendes #arron carpenter #magcon #nash grier imagine #magcon imagines