#thehobbitbadger

[ibijau]

for some reason, tumblr has decided I cannot sees notes from one of my oldest mutuals. It's happened before but I wasn't sure which person's likes were invisible. This time I know bc I also follow the person, and I see the reblogs, and I see the absence of notes, and it annoys me immensely bc how dare tumblr hide someone from me

#an elaborate way to say: thehobbitbadger tumblr is being mean to me about you!!! TAT #jau rants #I'll delete this later probably but yeah TAT

[dragonmuse]

Does Uncle Izzy ever have a year where he has to take Pickle trick or treating? I guess I'm in the mood for cozy Halloween...

@internerdionality and @thehobbitbadger both included this one in their groupings of questions, so I will save their asks for later and do this first!

The knock came right on time and Izzy opened his door to find a knee height unicorn, the pearlescent horn jutting out from her forehead and almost directly into his stomach. 

“Thanks so much for this,” Thomas said in a rush, handing over a bag with a jack o’lantern face on it and her little backpack. “Just make sure she doesn’t eat too much candy.” 

“Uh huh,” Izzy took the bag. “I don’t want her puking on me anymore than you do.” 

“Great! Bye, baby, have fun,” Thomas leaned down and kissed the top of Pickle’s head. 

“Bye, Daddy!” She chirped, then darted into the apartment. “When are we going?” 

“Dinner first,” Izzy insisted, turning to make sure she didn’t take a header and when he turned back around Thomas was gone. He and Delly supposedly had theater tickets, but he suspected they were dying for a night alone. 

He very rarely volunteered for overnights, but Delly had started looking a little wild around the eyes when picking Pickle up on Wednesday afternoons and Izzy didn’t want her to actually crack like an egg, so here they were. 

“Can I have cheese?” Pickle asked.  

“I made pizza,” he informed her. 

“Yay! What kind?” 

“Muschroom and sardine.” 

“Uncle Izzy,” she glared at him. “Don’t be mean.” 

“ I like mushrooms and sardines.” 

“I don’t!” 

“No?” He said vaguely, getting the oven mitts. “I guess you can have the plain one, but it sounds boring.” 

“Yay!” 

They ate on the couch. Pickle and the counter height stools had an unreliable history. She ate carefully, not getting any sauce on her monstrosity of a purple furry costume. Last week she had regaled Read in deep detail about the cartoon the thing was from and how it was a unicorn, but also a regular horse sometimes. Read had gone a little glassy-eyed and Izzy had tuned it all out to the best of his ability.  

“Where are we gonna go?” she asked when she’d wolfed down have of her dinner. 

“Figure we’ll do the building, then head out onto the street. Couple of stores will probably have stuff.” 

“Okay! Can we go until my bag is full?” 

“We’ll do an hour and see how we’re doing.” 

“But I want to get more than Carolyn.” 

Carolyn was technically Pickle’s closest friend, but Pickle also seemed to see her as a permanent adversary in a grudge match. The kid lived a few doors down from her, so maybe it was just a proximity thing. 

“We’ll see.” He had said that phrase more since she’d gotten old enough to ask for things than the rest of his life combined.  

“I’m ready!” 

“Finish your pizza, we’re not snacking as we go.” 

“But-” 

“Dinner.” 

“Meh.”

But she did finish eating and even brought her plate to the sink. The purple tail of the costume ended in a puff of iridescent strands. He’d have to vacuum later so Sweeney didn’t get them. The cat was sitting in the window, watching the commotion below with interest. Izzy gave him a chin scratch then took a deep breath and prepared for whatever nonsense was about to befall him. 

“Is Read home?” Pickle asked immediately. 

“Better knock and find out,” he opened the door so she could shoot across the hall to knock frenetically. 

The door opened almost immediately. Read was wearing a headband with two black pom poms on springs and a yellow and black striped sweatshirt. Behind her, Anne had a similar headband, with a single spring with a big flower on it. Otherwise, she was in her regular velvet leggings and sweater look. 

“Trick or Treat!” Pickle announced.  

“Look at you!” Read exclaimed, reached in to her sweat shirt pocket and deposited a few bits of candy into her pillowcase. “Hey, can I ask you a big favor?” 

“Yes!” Pickle said eagerly. 

“Can Anne come with you? She’s never done Halloween like this, can you believe it?” 

“Never?” Pickle asked, eyes wide. 

“Never ever,” Read said solemnly. “And I’ve got to study for a big test, so she’d be bored if she stayed here. 

“Did I say that?” Anne asked dryly. “I don’t think I said that.” 

“But it’s true,” Read insisted. “So can she come with?” 

“Yeah! Come with us, Anne!” 

Apparently no one was going to ask Izzy. Fucking figured. 

“Thanks, munchkin,” Anne smiled and bussed a kiss on Read’s cheek. 

“Are you a flower?” Pickle asked. 

“I am,” Anne confirmed. “Red flowers attract a lot of bees.” 

“Cool,” Pickle determined. “I’m Moonglow! So there’s this show-” 

“You can go down the hall,” Izzy cut her off. “Knock on the doors. If someone doesn’t respond in thirty seconds or so just jog on to the next.” 

“Okay!” And she was off like a shot. 

“Real reason you were booted from paradise?” Izzy asked. 

“She’s setting up a little spooky movie night for everyone. First movie is Pickle safe, so she can hang until bedtime,” Anne said readily. 

“Who’s everyone?” He asked resignedly. 

“Dunno. You know. People?” She shrugged. “Not more than she can fit in the apartment.  Probably.” 

“Didn’t help plan?” 

“I’ve been working overtime all week. I wasn’t even sure what day it was. I walked in and she stuck this thing on my head and here we are.” 

“Here we fucking are,” he agreed. 

“Oh, are you the man that lives in 19H?” An grey-haired woman asked as she let Pickle root through a small bowl of treats. 

“That’s me,” he said warily. 

“I’ve been meaning to ask about what you put on your windows. I noticed they’re tinted from the outside and I’ve been trying to block the light out in my bedroom for ages.” 

“Uh, just kind of this sticker thing. They sell them all over...” 

“I’m Babs, by the way,” she beamed down at Pickle who had made her selection. “Nice to see a child. Most years if I get one or two teenagers, I count myself lucky.” 

“Izzy,” he said, resigned. Years of anonymity were going to be destroyed in minute. 

“Well hold on a moment, let me get a pen and paper so you can write down the brand.” 

Free of Babs and having thoroughly cased the hall, they trooped down the stairs to conquer the 18th floor. 

“How’s things with work?” Izzy asked, when it became clear Pickle needed their help like she needed another hole in the head. 

“Pretty good. It’s more of a change from receptionist than I thought it would be, but I’m digging it so far. Lots of document organizing. Flint frowns at me like fifty percent less than he did at the beginning, so I must be making progress.” 

“Work on anything interesting?” 

“Not that I can talk about,” she sighed. “It’s really annoying. I have to be all vague and shit.” 

“Uh huh.” Izzy had spent most of his working life being blissfully vague to strangers, but such was life. 

He did, in fact, meet many more residents that he had taken note of over the years. Luckily, Pickle was distraction enough that he mostly escaped without learning anyone’s name.  Two of them though, the double parker with the year round winter coat and the mailbox busybody, both tried to make him stop and talk. By the time they got to the front door, he was ready to call it quits and it had only been forty minutes. 

“The pharmacy has a whole table out!” Pickle reported, ducking around the front door. “Come on, come on!” 

“Yeah,” Anne said dryly. “Come on.” 

“Fuck,” he groaned and they were out into the unseasonably balmy night. 

Children’s voices rang through the streets, clumps of them in bright costumes flanked by adults rushed in every direction. Traffic, naturally, didn’t slow and Izzy grabbed up Pickle’s hand. 

“Look at the windows!” Pickle said instead of complaining, happily gripping him back and bobbing around like a balloon on a string. “All the orange lights.” 

“Yeah, look at that,” Izzy said vaguely. 

Then he stopped and actually looked while Pickle talked to the kid working the pharmacy’s sad table. Someone had taken time and set up a Halloween village in the window. Lights blinking and a little graveyard with cotton cobwebs. 

“Did you do this as a kid?” Anne asked, follow his gaze. “Run around a neighborhood getting candy?” 

“Yeah, every year. Until I was ten or so.” 

“What would you dress up as? Unicorn?” she asked.  

Anne had a permanent dryness to her that Izzy generally appreciated. Even when it was aimed at him. 

“We didn’t have shit for anything big. Ghosts or robbers or whatever else we could piece together. Jonah was pretty good at drawing, so sometimes he’d do things on posterboard,” he tried to shake the memory loose. “Think I was a robot like that one year. Might’ve been Aaron.” 

“Mommy said she was a princess every year,” Pickle chimed in. 

“Huh, yeah, she was,” Izzy recalled. “Ma let her use her old prom dress. Some plastic crown too.” 

“She looked really nice, I saw a picture,” Pickle told Anne. “But every one is a princess and it’s boring.” 

“Oh yeah?” 

“Uh huh. Can we keep going?” 

They ranged up and down the street until it was Izzy holding the bag because Pickle couldn’t manage it anymore. 

“Good enough,” he declared. 

“Nooo I wanna keep going!” 

Anne checked her phone, “Dunno, you might miss a cool party if we don’t head back.” 

“A party?” Pickle’s eyes went wide. “Really?” 

“Really really.” 

“Hell yeah!” 

Izzy actually had to run a little to catch up with her. 

Read’s door was open, held by a shoe when they got upstairs. Sunshine was waiting by the door and gave an excited whine when she saw them coming. 

“Hey honey girl,” Anne crooned and Sunshine started wagging her whole body. 

“Come on in!” Read shouted from inside.  

Inside, the lights were dimmed and there was a jaunty light up jack o’lantern on the kitchen counter. Something that smelled pretty damn good was simmering on the stove. On the couch was Jim and Oluwande. Lucius had dragged over one of the barstools and Charlie was on the floor, shoulder resting against Lucius’ knee.  Izzy had known he was coming into town, but it had been for next week. 

“What are you doing here, leech?” He asked. 

“Leeching,” Charlie said cheerfully. “And suggesting movies no one else wants to watch, apparently.” 

“Yeah, this is like fun scared, not ‘holy shit I never want to sleep again’ scared,” Read snorted. “Hot cider?” 

Pickle commandeered Charlie into helping her sort candy which was great because Izzy had been planning some judicious application of latex gloves to that situation.  Instead, he got a mug of apple cider and after attempting to find a spot on the floor and being thwarted, a seat on Luicus’ lap, who was obviously very smug over the situation. 

“Hi,” Lucius kissed his cheek. “How was candy gathering?” 

“Fine,” Izzy grumbled. “You know she’ll be over tonight? You going to head back home after?” 

“Nah,” Lucius wrapped an arm around his waist. “How would I have halloween candy for breakfast if I did that?” 

“You wouldn’t,” Izzy glared at him, unaware that he looked much like Pickle just then. 

“I absolutely would and will,” Lucius cackled. “Oh hey, I love this song.” 

Apparently everyone did because the entire apartment broke out in a happy rendition of ‘What’s this?” as a skeleton pelted pell-mell through Christmastown. Pickle had even paused in her candy sorting to watch.  

“Don’t know the words, boss?” Jim teased. 

“Never seen the movie,” He shrugged. 

Many horrified eyes on him all at once. 

“What? I was a teenager when this came out.” 

“Old,” Jim heckled. 

“You were like thirteen and this movie was awesome even then, I bet,” Read decreed.  

“I was watching actual horror movies by then.” 

“Guess you’ll just have to pay attention now,” Oluwande shrugged. “People miss things, it happens.” 

“Yeah,” Jim conceded. “Fine. But pay attention.” 

Izzy sighed, but he did pay attention. Only a little distracted by Lucius’ hand on his hip, Pickle’s thousand and one questions and Charlie’s bizarre commentary when he got warmed up about the nature of claymation. 

So not that much attention at all actually, but he figured he would get points for trying.

#leda house and the kraken verse #ficlet #in a pickle #izzy hands #read the bones

[improbabledreams900]

Get to Know Me

Thanks to @sonnetnumber23 for tagging me! Haven’t done one of these in a blue moon.

Rules: Tag 9 people you want to know better.

Three ships: Aziraphale and Crowley, of course. Just finished watching Lucifer, so gotta put Lucifer/Chloe on here. Hmm...dunno if I have a third-favorite ship, but whatever Frodo and Sam have going on seems pretty great.

Last song: I’ve been listening to a lot of remixes lately, like this one of Let It Be Me. I had this remix of Tainted Love on repeat for days while working on a fic recently. The Riddle wins weirdest lyrics, though. I want them to mean something so much, but they just don’t!

Last movie: Saw Shang-Chi last weekend. It was good! For a non-spoilery thing to say, I thought it had the best music of a Marvel movie in a while.

Currently reading: In between books while I wait for @sonnetnumber23 to finish Fellowship of the Ring. Then it’ll be on to The Two Towers!

Currently watching: I just finished season 6 of Lucifer, does that count? I loved almost all of it, though I did have to go read parts of Redemption of Eden at the end to make myself feel better. XD

Currently consuming: Broccoli pasta with the saddest sauce you have ever seen, and cream cheese cookies. I would’ve had tomatoes from the garden, but this awful caterpillar destroyed two whole tomato plants. 😭

Currently craving: Autumn would be nice. It’s still 90º here. Could do with a new writing project, too—come on, GOHE, pick up the pace!

I’ll tag @thehobbitbadger, @trickster-archangel, and @whispsofwind, if any of you are interested.

#about me #sonnetnumber23 #thehobbitbadger #trickster-archangel #whispsofwind

[cakesandfail]

thehobbitbadger replied to your post: that fucking exit poll better not be right

i saw it and just immediately closed guardian’s page in the hope that it’s wrong. but i fear it’s maybe a little bit wrong, but the tories probably still won…

of course they fucking did, because this country is a nightmare

#thehobbitbadger #replies #ge19

[eliosu]

Just can’t get enough of these flower boys.

#lotr #gimli #legolas #fluffy #nice #request2017 #thehobbitbadger #my art #dumb comic #dwaf #elf

[useless-sloveniafacts]

So apparently Valvasor was the first person to describe vampires in print? observer. com/2017/10/history-of-vampires-johann-weichard-valvasor/

Yes! And Jure Grando is indeed considered to have been the earliest reported case of vampirism that we know of(you could say that he’s the prototype of “vampires” as we know them through popular culture today). He lived in the part of Istria that is now part of Croatia but yeah, I totally forgot it was Valvasor who described it!

#slovenia #~ #janez vajkard valvasor #slovene people #ask #thehobbitbadger

[notable-bumblr]

*hugs you real tight* would you please send this to the first 10 people in your dash? Make sure someone gets a hug today and stay safe!

@accio-hogwarts-bullshit @dovey-luv-bug @shanzsway @biggest-gaudiest-patronuses @thehobbitbadger @caroldanversenthusiast @art--school--wannabe @allthestarsareclose @slytherco @catastrophic-writer

thank you everyone for being amazing!!!

[colouritlater]

I was tagged by @handern 

1ST RULE: Tag 9 people you would like to know better :

Devy tagged half the people, I would have felt comfortable to tag.

@stalinistqueens @rockboci @thehobbitbadger

2ND RULE: bold the statements that are true

APPEARANCE: I am 5'7" or taller I wear glasses I have at least one tattoo I have at least one piercing I have blonde hair I have brown eyes I have short hair (I usually have but I am too depressed to deal with a hairdresser) My abs are at least somewhat defined I have or have had braces

PERSONALITY: I love meeting new people People tell me that I’m funny Helping others with their problems is a big priority for me (I try) I enjoy physical challenges I enjoy mental challenges I’m playfully rude with people I know well I started saying something ironically and now I can’t stop saying it

ABILITY: I can sing well I can play an instrument I can do over 30 pushups without stopping (used to) I’m a fast runner (AHAHAHAHHahHAhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh) I can draw well I have a good memory (fuck you depression) I’m good at doing math in my head  I can hold my breath underwater for over a minute I have beaten at least 2 people in arm wrestling I know how to cook at least 3 meals from scratch I know how to throw a proper punch

HOBBIES: I enjoy playing sports I’m on a sports team at my school or somewhere else I’m in an orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else I have learned a new song in the past week I work out at least once a week  I’ve gone for runs at least once a week in the warmer months I have drawn something in the past month I enjoy writing I do or have done martial arts

EXPERIENCES: I have had alcohol I have scored the winning goal in a sports game I have watched an entire season of a TV show in one sitting I have been at an overnight event I have been in a taxi I have been in the hospital or ER in the past year I have beaten a video game in one day I have visited another country I have been to one of my favourite band’s concerts

MY LIFE: I have at least one person I consider a close friend I live close to my school My parents are still together I have at least one sibling I live in the United States There is snow right now where I live (in the mountains) I have hung out with a friend in the past month I have a smartphone I have at least 15 CDs I share my room with someone 

RANDOM: I have breakdanced I know a person named Jamie I have had a teacher with a last name that’s hard to pronounce (dear professor Appelsoffer I miss you, but not your name)

I have dyed my hair I’m listening to one song on repeat right now I have punched someone in the past week I know someone who has gone to jail I have broken a bone (I was hit by a bike when I was 5) I have eaten a waffle today (I should have , now that I think about it) I know what I want to do with my life   I speak at least 2 languages I have made a new friend in the past year

#personal #Off Topic

[dragonmuse]

A/N: for @thehobbitbadger @believesinponds, @objective-j and @internerdionality, who all requested to see Charlie’s introduction to Izzy in 'I may be bad, but I'm perfectly good at it'.

Charlie has an office now. There were only two, one that Jim and Lucius shared and one that had sort of been a catch all private space when someone needed it. The bookkeeper worked from home, apparently and no one else had need of it. 

Until Charlie had started pulling in jobs on his own. From Jim, he’d learned how to handle himself if things went wrong. From Lucius, how to lean in when they were going right. He was fast on his feet both literally and proverbially.  

“A born con man,” Lucius decreed. 

And now he had his own office, free to research and decide on his own targets as long as they both rubber-stamped his efforts. Most of the time, he was even doing legitimate work, selling the security end of the business so Jim could focus on the actual jobs or finding buyers for the real pieces Lucius sometimes acquired.  

The rest of the time Charlie charmed, flirted and seduced his way to tidy payouts that got him affectionate back pats from Jim and Lucius’ approval. He flourished under their attention and could fully admit that they had primed him well to do whatever it was that needed doing. 

But better than the office, was Lucius stepping inside it one afternoon with a smile, 

“How’s it going?” 

“Good, got a lead on the Sargent you were interested in.” 

“Excellent,” Lucius closed the door and leaned back on it. “You have any plans for tonight?” 

“No,” Charlie said, already mentally canceling his hookup. The guy wasn’t that interesting. “Why?” 

“Izzy decided to do a whole roast chicken and potato dinner tonight. Forgot Read was out of town. I figured, who else do I know that can be counted on destroying potential leftovers?” 

“Really?” Charlie knew he sounded too eager, but the thought was beyond tempting. He’d always longed to see Lucius’ apartment and to meet his elusive husband. Jim talked about him like a beloved uncle, and Lucius always softened around the edges over it. He had to meet the guy. 

“Yeah, really,” Lucius shrugged. “I figure I can trust you with the address.” 

Charlie did not say that he already had it. Lucius was good at hiding, but Charlie lived to fly under the radar. 

“What time do you want me to come by?” 

“Oh, just come home with me, I’ll already have the car coming around.”  

“Sounds good.” 

Suffused with giddiness, Charlie went out for lunch and stopped at the liquor store. He made a purchase. His mother hadn’t failed him, he would come with a gift like a well-behaved young man. Even if he had given up good behavior for wealth and adrenaline spikes. 

Lucius tapped on his door hours later and Charlie got to his feet with a ready grin. He hadn’t changed, didn’t want to look too excited for this invitation, but he had a feeling Lucius knew he was anyway. He always seemed to know. 

“Ready?” 

“Yep,” he scooped up his jacket, sliding it on.  

“Where are you two headed?” Jim asked. They were also leaving apparently, headed for the elevator, brushing by Lucius. 

“Told you,” Lucius shoulder-checked them gently. “Taking Charlie home.” 

“Make sure there’s leftovers,” Jim leveled a look at Lucius.

“Aw, you know I always bring you lunch.” 

“Luc.” 

“Jim. I know.” 

“Okay then.” 

Charlie had no idea how to parse that. He rarely did when the two of them got on a roll. He hoped he’d be around long enough to start to decrypt it. For now, he followed Lucius down to a waiting car and slid into the backseat. 

“Just one thing,” Lucius stretched out, crossing his legs in front of him. “We don’t talk about work much with Iz. Especially not the bar.” 

“Okay.” Charlie frowned. “Why not? I mean, he knows all about it. I get it with Oluwande, but him?” 

“He’s mostly retired and he likes to keep his nose out of it. Let me do things my way. You can tell him about your other stuff. He’s a big reader too.” 

“All right,” that was a small price to pay for admission. Charlie rarely talked about work outside of it anyway. He had plenty of practice hiding it away from Alma especially. They had dinner once a week and he was glad for all the legitimate projects he did to feed to her. 

“Did you figure out the Sargent?” 

“You’re going to love this,” Charlie grinned and launched into the pitch he’d been saving for the next day. 

“Jim is going to ask you for the specs.” 

“Already done. And I’ve got the personnel list for you to check out too.” 

“Good,” Lucius nodded slowly. “I like how much you’re anticipating us, Charlie.” 

“That’s the job, right?” 

“Part of it. But it's a part we appreciate."

They arrived at a building Charlie had walked by a few times. Glassy tower that thrust up into the sky. Lucius nodded at the doorman, even as he swiped his ID. The security here was probably excellent, but Charlie, for once, wasn’t trying to clock cameras. He was intent on watching Lucius move through his own territory. Gauging his body language without being caught out at it. 

He was ever so slightly more relaxed once they were in the elevator, doors closed behind them. The sunglasses, ever present were plucked from his head and unceremoniously shoved into a coat pocket. 

A delicate chime signaled their arrival as the doors slid open into an outstanding view. Charlie made an appreciative noise because that was clearly what this was meant to elicit. 

“It’s amazing on foggy days.” Lucius removed his shoes, setting them on a rack. Charlie mirrored him, flexing his socked feet against the cool tile. “Like living in the clouds.” 

“I bet it’s spectacular.” 

“Luc?” Someone called, in a deep whiskey-rough voice. 

“Coming, darling!” Lucius’ shoulders rounded a little, his hands came out of his pockets. “He’s in the kitchen, come on.” 

Charlie followed him through the massive show-off living room into one of those kitchens that seemed to exist only in magazines. It was probably amazing, but Charlie’s full attention had snapped to the man at the stove. 

He was shorter than Charlie would’ve imagined, but he could see the outline of strength in his limbs. As he turned to face Lucius, his face lit up, a smile that wasn’t large, but emanated joy. It wrinkled up the corners of his eyes. A fall of silver hair with traces of dark strands reached his shoulders, softening the planes of a hard face. He was aged, but stronger for it. There was nothing of Lucius’ style attached to him. He was dressed simply, jeans worn thin in all the right places and a black v-neck sweater with just a little chest hair visible. 

Goddamn. 

“Hello,” Lucius murmured and leaned down for a long kiss. Charlie had seen Lucius kiss a lot of men, even some women, and he knew the motions. This was something else. Tender. Kind. The release was slow, and Lucius left a hand on Izzy’s neck as he turned to face Charlie. “Izzy, this is Charlie. Charlie, this is my husband Izzy.” 

“Nice to meet you,” Charlie pulled the shiny gift bag the liquor store had provided from out of his jacket. “I’ve wanted to for ages. This is for you.” 

Izzy lifted his eyebrows. “Why?” 

“Lucius always talks about you. Wanted to put a name to the face.” 

Izzy accepted the bag and pulled out the very nice bottle of vodka out of it. 

“Charlie,” Lucius laughed. “You pay too much attention sometimes.” 

“That’s what you pay more for,” he shrugged. “Is it the right kind?” 

“Yes,” Izzy read the label and then set it on the counter. “How’d you know?” 

“Let me guess,” Lucius was clearly amused, so Charlie knocked it up as a win already. “Last year...at the airport. I said I ordered the shot because I was thinking of home. I noticed you typing away after that.” 

“I don’t have your memory,” Charlie admitted. “But I’ve gotten better at texting without looking.” 

“That’s still sharp,” Izzy glanced at Lucius, “Dinner is almost ready.” 

“All right,” Lucius dropped his hand. “We’ll get out of your way. Where are we eating?” 

“Thought you might want the balcony tonight.” 

“You’re a genius,” Lucius praised and Izzy’s smile widened.  Yeah, Charlie could fucking relate. He wondered what else they had in common.

The balcony turned out to be a sweeping space on the rooftop. The sun was setting and the potted plants along with the faux antique light posts gave the space the feeling of a grotto.  There was a generous wrought iron table beneath what Charlie thought might be, 

“A fruit tree?” 

“Lemons, supposedly.” Lucius touched a leaf fondly. “Almost time to bring it inside for the year. Always a pain, but it was Jim’s housewarming present. We’ve managed to keep it alive for almost a decade now. No lemons though. Not sure it knows how.” 

“Might not be the right climate for it.” 

“Don’t tell Jim that. They’re convinced we’re just doing something wrong.” 

There must’ve been some unseen dumbwaiter setup because Izzy reached the balcony and then produced two trays of food.  The chicken smelled pungently of garlic and rosemary, the mound of potatoes was graced with a fat pat of yellow butter, and the green beans were speckled with slivered almonds. There was sparkling water with it, no trace of the vodka, but Charlie hardly cared as he started eating. 

“This is fantastic,” he said delightedly. He was careful to chew, swallow, then talk. Lucius was very firm about table manners around clients and the painful lessons had stuck. At least in front of the man himself. Jim didn’t care and sometimes they just tossed popcorn at each other to see who could catch more in their mouth. Jim usually won.  

“All in the dry rub,” Izzy speared a piece himself, examining it. “Probably a few minutes too long in the oven.” 

“Stop,” Lucius snorted. “It’s perfect, Iz. Come on.” 

“Really juicy,” Charlie agreed. “Anyway, I’m a terrible cook.” 

“Don’t you live on your own?” Izzy asked. 

So maybe Lucius talked about him. That was good, he decided. Very good. 

“Yeah, my roommate went off to medical school. Rude, right?” 

“What do you eat then?” 

“Take out,” Charlie shrugged. “And no cook stuff. Cereal. Peanut butter and jelly. I’m rarely there, it hardly matters.” 

Izzy ate a green bean very slowly. 

“Charlie is going to get my Sargent,” Lucius announced. Weren’t they not supposed to talk about work?  “What do you think of hanging it where the Manet was, darling?” 

“How big is it?”  

“Little smaller, portrait though.” 

“Yeah, could be good.” 

Okay, not work. Interior design. Charlie could roll with that. They talked about paintings for awhile and then Izzy asked, tentative like he was going out on a limb, what Charlie liked to read. Their tastes overlapped some, certainly they shared common themes and enough authors to get going. Izzy was dryly funny, and not shy about tearing up some of Charlie’s favorites as ‘ridiculous shit’ or allowing some of them as ‘decent enough’. Animated like this, Charlie could see exactly how Lucius had been drawn to him.  

He was beautiful, but Charlie didn’t turn on the charm. Didn’t flirt. Didn't even do the more subtle bits of seduction that he'd polished in the last year. Lucius knew all his moves, would clock them immediately and he didn’t need that particular drama. Instead he just dug into the conversation along with the potatoes and laughed when Izzy was funny which seemed to startle the man a little each time.

Lucius only offered a comment or two, leaning back in his chair once dinner was finished and watching them both with a small smile. 

“Coffee?” Izzy offered as Charlie finally set down his fork. 

“Yeah, that’d be great, thanks.” 

When Izzy got up, so did Lucius, “Let me help with the dishes, darling.” 

“Thanks,” Izzy started stacking up the tray. When Charlie made a move to help, Lucius waved him away. 

“You’re our guest tonight,” he practically purred. 

Charlie knew all of Lucius’ moves too. Hair prickled up on the back of his neck. The pretty, but fairly dim lights made it hard to tell Lucius’ expression. A tiny flare of hope kindled in Charlie’s belly anyway. 

They took away the dishes and left Charlie on the rooftop. He got to his feet, too keyed up now to sit patiently for them to come back. The rooftop had a few discrete sitting areas. The little dining grotto,  a few chairs set up facing the west and an easel hidden among more potted plants with a mostly blank canvas on it. He stepped up to it, only able to make out thin pencil lines.

Sometimes Lucius will idly sketch at work and Charlie loved to watch the picture turn from loose curves into something real and immediate. Jim’s hand around an apple was a favorite, discarded after the meeting and left behind so that Charlie could scavenge it. He kept it at home, framed on a shelf, a private memento. 

Drifting to the furthest corner of the roof, he found another secluded spot. There was a covered hot tub and beside it, what could only be a bed though it was made of more weather proof material. With the amount of foliage tucked around it, it would provide no view, but of the sky. One could be very naked here and only fear exposure to low flying planes. 

“Do you like it?” Lucius stepped into the nook behind Charlie. 

“Yeah,” Charlie turned slowly to face him. “Should I not have wandered off?” 

“It’s fine, no secrets here,” Lucius held out a hand to him, “but I don’t think this is where it happens.” 

Charlie didn’t hesitate, putting his hand into Lucius’. He didn’t ask what he meant either.

“Come inside, Charlie,” Lucius drew him back into the fairy lit center of the roof. “Let me give you the tour.” 

Charlie went with him. Charlie would always go with him. 

The second floor was homier than the first. The sitting room with its comfortable couches looked far more lived in, even if it was painfully tidy. There was an office, black and chrome which put it at odds with every other room, but somehow welcoming too. Charlie didn’t go in, Lucius shutting the door as they went by it. Instead, he made a quiet promise to himself that he’d go in another time and ferret out what was appealing about the simple space. 

“And the main bedroom.” Lucius stopped outside the door. He was still holding Charlie’s hand. “You know if you go in...well. Consider it a bonus. For all your hard work.” 

“And if I don’t?” He asked though the conclusion was forgone. 

“Then you go home,” Lucius shrugged. “And we go on as we have been.” 

“Are you coming too?” 

“Oh yes,” he drew Charlie’s hand up to his lips, pressed a single kiss into his palm. “But I’ll just be watching tonight. I like to see the lay of the land before I go exploring on occasion.” 

“Why now? Why at all?” He had to ask. He braced himself for Lucius’ dismissal. 

Instead there was a single gentle nip to the meat of his thumb that shot electric want through him. 

“I’ll be away for a month for our next job. I’m taking Jim with me. Izzy...he gets in his head,” Lucius said and it wasn’t a put on or a mood or slick line. It was just the way Lucius talked to Jim. Frank and sometimes, genuinely warm. Charlie had never had it directed at him before and it was somehow even hotter than being seduced. “If we do this, he’ll know you’re safe to play with. To occupy himself. He'll probably feed you as much as fuck you. So. Will you be safe for him?” 

“Always,” he promised. 

“If you fuck up...” 

“Then I deserve what I get,” Charlie finished for him. “I won’t.” 

Lucius’ charming fake smile returned. “Then shall we?” 

The door opened and Charlie stepped into another chapter of his life. 

#leda house and the kraken verse #ficlet #i may be bad but I'm perfectly good at it

[ibijau]

I posted 9,946 times in 2022

913 posts created (9%)

9,033 posts reblogged (91%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@trickstercheshi

@thehobbitbadger

@veraverorum

@the-rat-king-shriggy

@anxious-witch

I tagged 4,500 of my posts in 2022

#mdzs - 1,609 posts

#jau rants - 851 posts

#xisang - 244 posts

#mo dao zu shi - 224 posts

#svsss - 220 posts

#nie huaisang - 209 posts

#lan xichen - 194 posts

#baby weasel - 150 posts

#self reblog - 146 posts

#jau writes - 142 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#haven't seen it in nearly three weeks at this point and i was in the middle of reading emma and it was starting to get to the really fun bit

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

I think I need to find post-apocalypse stories where things are ok. Yeah, the old world collapsed, things are different, people live among the ruins of what came before them... but also, things are ok. People found a new way of existing that better respects the world around them and let the planet heal. it’s not all mad max horrors. Life sucks sometimes because it’s hard to have a story otherwise, but mostly people get by and are not doing badly.

399 notes - Posted August 28, 2022

#4

gamer!nhs/dragon!lxc drawing prompt: dragon!lwj shows up. He is judgemental

See the full post

438 notes - Posted April 3, 2022

#3

more de-aged jgy au

listen I think lxc loves kids and nhs just needs to accept that they’re raising a child together now

585 notes - Posted January 20, 2022

#2

Drawing prompt: sect leaders do a PSA (I'm thinking NHS, LXC, JC, JGY, but any sect leaders really)

they're trying their best to give good advice, bless them

668 notes - Posted October 3, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

See the full post

936 notes - Posted March 14, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #I am still baffled that people liked the snake au that much tbh

[dragonmuse]

@thehobbitbadger I love all of these, except for Read. I don't think she could be any of the Greek heroes, they're all arrogant and full of hubris, and she is such a pure cinnamon roll :P

lolol, she is very sweet, but I guess she is more superhero than demigod really. She could be Nike, actually. Winged victory, child of Ares!

@doublewindsor I know it’s Roman, but the Swede is Pomona (goddess of fruit) 🍊🍊

Looked around a little and the greek goddess of fruit is Carpo, apparently!

[ibijau]

Here's another angst prompt for you, should you choose to accept it. JC/NHS or JC/NMJ or similar. Someone convinces NHS/whoever that the way to test JCs love for them is to make him jealous and make him fight for a relationship harder, except that's not how JC works, he's all like 'I knew NHS couldn't really love me, he'll be happier with XX, I have no right to force him into an unhappy relationship' etc etc etc and just aaaaannnggsstt!

as usual, I’m not sure how well this fits the prompt, oops. But there’s Jiang Cheng, there’s a Nie, and there’s some jealousy as well!

Jiang Cheng left the room without a word, and headed out for a walk in the gardens of Carp Tower. He had seen enough.

It wasn’t a surprise as such that Nie Huaisang, a few cups of wine into the banquet, should start misbehaving. For someone who drank so much, he couldn’t handle alcohol very well, always making a spectacle of himself. Usually that meant crying over a minor problem with his sect, or about how much he missed his brother, but sometimes, like that night, he would get flirtatious instead.

Jiang Cheng, often a victim of that flirtatiousness, had more than once advised him to stop drinking in public. It was often a half-hearted scolding though, because he didn’t exactly dislike having Nie Huaisang’s attention like that, especially not now that Nie Huaisang, on occasion, had made overtures while sober as well. Jiang had started wondering how he was supposed to show that he didn’t dislike the idea, but hadn’t found out how yet.

Which was just as well. If that night had proven anything, it was that Nie Huaisang had never seen this as more than a game. And after seeing him shamelessly flirt with Lan Xichen all evening, pouting and batting his eyes like one of those dancers the late Jin Guangshan sometimes brought to conferences, Jiang Cheng felt stupid for ever thinking Nie Huaisang could have seen him as more than a temporary amusement.

Jiang Cheng hadn’t been walking for very long when he heard footsteps rushing behind him. He hated that even before turning around, he could recognise the person. His mother hadn’t been wrong, every time she’d told him he needed to harden himself against others. It really was weak of him to be so desperate for attention.

“What do you want, Nie zongzhu?” Jiang Cheng hissed, refusing to turn around.

He heard the footsteps stop a moment and a soft gasp, as if Nie Huaisang were surprised to have been noticed and recognised. An instant later, Nie Huaisang sauntered at his side, hidden behind a fan.

“Jiang-xiong, you left so suddenly, I became worried. Is there a problem?”

The tone of Nie Huaisang’s voice might have been innocent, but the way he peered at Jiang Cheng over the edge of his fan wasn’t. It was easy to forget, with the way he acted and how he never made anything of it, but Nie Huaisang was pretty good at reading people when he bothered. That he had been seen through made Jiang Cheng’s heart twist with shame.

“It was just too noisy in there, I needed some quiet,” he lied. Partly lied. Banquets held in Carp Tower really were annoying, and brought back unpleasant memories. He’d never have come again, if not for the chance to see Jin Ling. “I’m fine, you can go back and have your fun.”

Nie Huaisang stared at him a moment, then closed his fan and turned as if to leave.

“You’re right, I should enjoy myself while I can. Er-ge is so fun when he unwinds a little, isn’t he?”

Jiang Cheng huffed, refusing to comment on that. All Lans were the same to him, not one of them worth anyone’s time, yet always catching the attention of people around him. If Nie Huaisang wanted to have shitty tastes though, he was more than welcome to go after whoever he pleased.

Unbothered by his lack of reply, Nie Huaisang started walking back towards the buildings. He didn’t make it very far before he stopped again.

“Seriously? That’s how much you care?” he asked in a voice steadier than it ought to have been after how much he’d drunk.

Surprised by the chance, Jiang Cheng turned to look at him. Nie Huaisang was glaring at him, hands on his hips, a stern frown on his face. With such an expression, he looked a lot like his brother.

“I wasn’t aware I was supposed to care about anything,” Jiang Cheng dryly retorted. “Please, go back and have fun with Lan zongzhu.”

Nie Huaisang tilted his head, his eyes narrowing.

“Jiang-xiong, I just never know how to go about things with you,” he sighed, coming closer again. “You’re always making things more complicated than they need to be.”

“That’s rich, coming from you,” Jiang Cheng retorted, only for Nie Huaisang to tense and quickly hide again behind his fan. “I remember the kind of schemes you’d come up with when we were students. Now that was needlessly complicated.”

Nie Huaisang laughed awkwardly, and lowered his fan a little.

“Ah, yes, that. I was young, I needed to have fun. I still want to have fun. It’s just harder now. And you,” he stated, closing his fan to poke it at Jiang Cheng’s chest, “are a lot less cooperating than you used to be. Hence my previous statement: I never know how to go about things with you.”

“By the look of it, you don’t need me to have fun,” Jiang Cheng replied, batting away the fan. “Lan Xichen seems more than happy to provide you with all the amusement that you need, so go back to him and leave me alone.”

“Er-ge has been indulging me a lot tonight,” Nie Huaisang agreed, stepping closer still.

Jiang Cheng gritted his teeth.

Rationally, he knew that Lan Xichen hadn’t exactly flirted back. All he had done was reply to Nie Huaisang’s very silly remarks, laughed at his jokes, and tried to make sure the younger man ate a little between two cups of wine. As far as Jiang Cheng knew, Lan Xichen had never once given any indications that he thought of Nie Huaisang as anything but a second little brother, slightly more whiny and demanding that the first one, but a brother still.

Jiang Cheng wasn’t in a mindset to be rational, not about this.

Because he knew, also, that Lans weren’t exactly demonstrative about their feelings. He knew that Lan Xichen had been there for Nie Huaisang since the moment his brother died. He knew that it was to Lan Xichen (and Jin Guangyao, not that it mattered right then) that Nie Huaisang turned to whenever he encountered problems, even though Jiang Cheng had made it clear he was willing to give a hand as well.

He couldn’t even blame Nie Huaisang for this. Between the number one bachelor of their generation who lead a rich and powerful sect and was skilled in every domain, and the leader of a half ruined sect that was still desperately trying to get back on its feet, a man with so little to make himself appealing that he’d been judged less attractive than the son of a nobody… well, it wasn’t hard to see who Nie Huaisang would pick.

Nobody, given the choice between Jiang Cheng and literally anything else, had ever chosen Jiang Cheng. Even Wei Wuxian had chosen a life in exile and poverty rather than stay at his side, so why would Nie Huaisang be any different?

“Good for you,” Jiang Cheng hissed. “Invite me to the wedding I guess.”

He tried to leave, but Nie Huaisang quickly grabbed his arm with unexpected strength to stop him.

“Jiang-xion, wait! I swear you’re so… can’t you react normally sometimes?”

“Apparently not!” Jiang Cheng spat. “What’s a normal reaction supposed to be?”

“I don’t know,” Nie Huaisang whined, twisting and turning his closed fan in his free hand. “Something? Anything? Maybe saying ‘I’m better than him’ or ‘I won’t lose you to him’ or something like this? Make an effort, Jiang Cheng, I can’t keep carrying this courtship all on my own!”

Jiang Cheng blinked a few times, startled by that unexpected reasoning.

“I’d be an idiot to think I’m better than Lan-fucking-Xichen,” he numbly pointed out. “And what do you mean by courtship? Who’s courting who here?”

He hadn’t realised that it was something so serious between Lan Xichen and Nie Huaisang, but maybe his own stupid infatuation had forced them to make it more obvious so he’d stop mooning over Nie Huaisang like a lovesick puppy.

Nie Huaisang who tensed again, and threw him a worried look.

“I thought… Jiang-xiong… Jiang zongzhu, did I misread the situation?” he asked, sounding oddly fragile. “I thought we were courting? Isn’t it… I thought you were just a little shy about it,” he whispered, dropping his gaze. “That’s why I… I just wanted to spur you on, I didn’t think… This is so embarrassing. I’m sorry, Jiang zongzhu. I’ll stop pestering you then.”

True to his word, he released Jiang Cheng’s arm, looking more pitiful with every passing moment.

“You never said you wanted a courtship,” Jiang Cheng snapped, making Nie Huaisang flinch.

“I thought it was obvious?” he replied with a nervous laugh. “Like I said, it’s fine, I’ll stop…”

“How was I supposed to guess?” Jiang Cheng cut him. “You’re supposed to ask these things, you idiot.”

Flinching again, Nie Huaisang met his eyes, looking as if he might cry, and opened his fan once more. He didn’t say anything for a while, just observing Jiang Cheng carefully until he seemed to reach a conclusion and lowered his fan again.

“Jiang-xiong, you… is that you saying that you wouldn’t be opposed if I just asked?”

“Don’t say it like it’s an outrageous thing to want! It’s normal to ask!”

Nie Huaisang’s eyes went wide, before he burst out laughing.

“Jiang-xiong, only you would need it spelled out when I’ve been so obvious about it! Even Lan Xichen noticed, and he wouldn’t notice a murder happening right under his nose, so that’s saying something.”

That seemed like an oddly specific remark, Jiang Cheng thought, before deciding he didn’t want to ask about that when there were more important matters at hand.

“So you do want a courtship,” Jiang Cheng insisted.

“Yes.”

“With me?”

“Yes, with you!” Nie Huaisang laughed. “Who else? Lan Xichen? No thanks. I’m a Nie, I can’t imagine being with someone who never took the time to develop a personality. So, Jiang Cheng, let me ask you properly: would you entertain the idea of a courtship between the two of us?”

Jiang Cheng nodded, the words stuck in his throat. It seemed almost too good to be true, that anyone would choose him, that Nie Huaisang of all people would choose him, but he wasn’t about to question his luck.

“Good, excellent, we’re finally getting somewhere,” Nie Huaisang said, still half laughing, his cheeks flushed beautifully. “I guess just saying things isn’t a bad method either, after all. Now, Jiang Cheng, how about you kiss me?”

Jiang Cheng spluttered and grumbled at the shameless request, but quickly obeyed anyway.

#jiang cheng #nie huaisang #sangcheng #mo dao zu shi #the untamed #jau writes #my main reason for writing this was to poke fun at xisang yes thanks #and I picked nhs rather than nmj because nmj seems too sensible to try something like this lol #thehobbitbadger

[ibijau]

Ok, here's a prompt for you, should you choose to accept it, as a fellow angst connoisseur. I've been reading Impenetrable Walls by Gina3 which is a concubine AU, except so far Wei Ying has been too dumb to understand that his job as a concubine is to f*ck, but all the servants around him keep telling him to make sure Lan Wangji is happy or it's all their lives at stake. 1/2

2/2 Anyway, the prompt is this: imagine this scenario but with Xisang or Xiyao. Xichen is the emperor, he has spent his whole life being venerated and served and then he is gifted Huaisang/Meng Yao as a concubine and they both know they have no choice but to make the emperor happy no matter what. Xichen is convinced he's in a happy relationship and unaware that he has in fact been raping his partner this whole time, because there is no possible consent in this situation. The angst! Just imagine

Yes hi hello I, uh. Took this and ran with it, even though I have prompts left from the last ask meme and a bunch of fics that I should be updating and also actual work to do. But like. Fuck yeah. This is exactly the sort of awful, shitty, cruel settings that I love writing so bless you for sending me this.

It was a rare and pleasant day for His Highness when Nie Mingjue could take a break from the war on the frontier and visit the palace. On those too rare occasions, His Highness always allowed himself a break from protocole and tradition and, for a few hours, simply became Lan Xichen again. He had so few friends left since rising to power, but Nie Mingjue had never faltered once, never once treated him as a living divinity as others did, knowing it was not what Lan Xichen wanted from their friendship. It must have been a family trait.

As he walked toward his private quarters, Lan Xichen smiled to himself, certain that his dear little bird must be so happy to see his brother again after many months. Nie Huaisang always smiled so brightly after those rare visits, while teasing Lan Xichen with a renewed insolence that always deligthed him. It would be so nice to have his two closest, most beloved people with him at once, however briefly, and Lan Xichen couldn't wait to surprise them. He shouldn't not have been free for them until a little while longer, but on a whim he had cancelled a council. There was little point in being emperor if he could not get away with something selfish here and there.

As he entered the little house he'd ordered to be built for Nie Huaisang, Lan Xichen heard his little bird chatting with his brother and stopped for a moment, suddenly feeling guilty for taking away the siblings' precious chance for a private discussion. Although Nie Huaisang rarely complained about anything, Lan Xichen knew that his little bird missed home dearly sometimes. No amount of presents and coddling could change that, and while the two of them were so happy together, a lover simply wasn't a brother.

As he hesitated though, Lan Xichen quickly noticed that something appeared to be off with his little bird. His voice, usually so soft and full of laughter, was uncharacteristically dry as he chatted with his brother.

“With Wen Xu dead, that bastard Wen Ruohan won't manage much longer,” he heard his little bird say, the violence of the words half shocking Lan Xichen. “His first born was a good general, whereas the second one... Is Wen Zhuliu still serving them?”

“For now,” Nie Mingjue replied flatly, apparently undisturbed to hear his delicate little brother comment on war affairs. “We're working on turning him. Lord Jiang's wife knew him when he was young, so we're having her make offers to take him in if he switches sides. You were right though, he is stupidly loyal.”

“You probably won't get him,” Nie Huiasang agreed, “but Wen Ruohan will hear about those offers and he won't trust him as much... and that means he'll have to rely on his idiotic second son instead. If Wen Chao is put in charge of their southern army, the war is as good as won for us. Can you imagine? Peace again!”

“But at what cost?”

A silence fell between the brothers. Out of curiosity, Lan Xichen came closer to get a look at them without being seen himself. An emperor ought not to have hidden, least of all inside his own palace, his own home, but something about that conversation was making him increasingly uncomfortable.

When they were alone, Nie Huaisang never wanted to talk about politics, pouting and complaining that he never understood anything of it. To hear him give his opinion about the border wars with such certainty was... unsettling.

And so he looked at his little bird and his dearest friend, sitting together at a table. Nie Mingjue was in a more comfortable position than he usually allowed himself in presence of the emperor, though there was a clear tension to his shoulders. As for Nie Huaisang, although he was wearing the same delicate and colourful robes as always while his hair was done up in an elegant bun decorated with elaborate pins, he seemed like a stranger, sitting not like the poised boy Lan Xichen knew and adored, but instead with no more grace than a soldier resting after a battle.

“Peace always comes at a price,” Nie Huaisang pointed out, rolling his eyes. “This one isn't so bad.”

“Are you going to tell me you're happy with your life?” Nie Mingjue scoffed. “That you're satisfied with being the emperor's whore?”

“Of course not,” Nie Huaisang sighed with a grimace. “Still, to defeat the Wens... it's not such a big price to pay. I don't blame father. He saw his chance to finally make me be useful to the clan, how could he not have taken it?”

A twisted, piercing cold seized Lan Xichen, making it near impossible to breathe. He had wanted to come out of his hiding place and order Nie Mingjue out of their home at hearing him call his own brother a whore, only to feel slapped in the face at his little bird's response.

It made no sense. Nie Huaisang was happy. Of course he was happy. Lan Xichen made sure to give him everything he could ever want, robes of expensive silk, beautiful fans painted by the greatest masters, all his favourite dishes served daily... he had even started construction on an aviary for him, so he could gift him rare and exotic birds. Nie Huaisang was happy. He said so often, made it clear through his actions, always enjoying seducing Lan Xichen as soon as they could be alone.

They were happy and in love.

They had been happy and in love since the first time they had laid eyes on each other at a banquet and Nie Huaisang, not realising who was in front of him, had chatting with him and teased him over wearing badly coordinated robes. By some great luck, Nie Huaisang had been sent to work in the imperial palace soon after and Lan Xichen had not lost a moment in pursuing that chance of friendship. It had soon turned into something more intimate, with Nie Huaisang being officially named his concubine so there could be no accusations of impropriety.

“I'm going to take you back home someday,” Nie Mingjue grunted. “The day father dies, I'll ask to have you back, I swear.”

“Don't be stupid,” Nie Huaisang retorted. “You think His Highness will let me go? I'm stuck here for life, or until someone else finds him a prettier boy to play with. And that's impossible, we both know I am, and by far, the prettiest boy in the entire country. Possibly the world even. Ah, it's a curse to be so beautiful.”

“Huaisang!”

Something shifted in Nie Huaisang's eyes. He slumped on the table, reaching out to take his brother's hand and holding it tight.

“I swear it's not so bad,” he sighed. “He's nice. He's doing his best to be nice. Please don't worry about me, and don't... don't do anything reckless on my behalf. I chose this. I agreed to this. He asked me if I wanted to be his concubine, and I said yes.”

“Could you have said no?”

Instead of answer Nie Huaisang laughed in such a broken way that Lan Xichen felt nauseous. Of course his little bird could have denied that request. Lan Xichen had even told him so when he had asked for this, reminded him that even his friendship was enough to make him happy.

Nie Huaisang could have said no.

Nie Huaisang should have said no.

“Can you imagine what father would have said?” Lan Xichen heard his little bird say in a bitter voice that no longer sounded like his. “MingMing, we needed His Highness's support. We have it. There's nothing more to be said about this, so let's drop that subject. I'm... I'm really not so bad off in here, just a little lonely. I hope when the war is won, you can come more often. You're my only link to the outside world, so do your job. Give me news. How are the Jiang kids? And Wei Wuxian?”

“Lord Jiang gave him a command at last,” Nie Mingjue announced. “And the young Lady Jiang is to be married to young Lord Jin after all. The ceremony will be held in three months.”

Immediately, Nie Huaisang sat up straighter and smiled so brightly that it rivalled the sun.

“Really? Oh, that's so great!” He exclaimed, half laughing. “They'll be perfect for each other, I'm so glad it worked out after all! Tell me what happened?”

Seeing him so happy for the friends he often swore he did not miss was the last drop for Lan Xichen. It was obvious, now, how insincere his little bird's smiles had been when directed at him, how fake his joy, how forced his laughs. And so, while Nie Mingjue told his brother about a happy couple figuring out their path to happiness, Lan Xichen mourned the loss of his own and quietly retreated from this little house where, for the last three years, he had been fed lie after lie.

He had freed his afternoon for the purpose of his two dear friends' company, but it would be easy to find some task or other that needed his attention. An emperor's work was never done. 

And work, once more, was all he had.

#xisang #nie huaisang #lan xichen #mo dao zu shi #concubine au #jau writes #given half a chance I will absolutely write more on this #for the record I'd say the spark at their first meeting was sincere #but then politics happened and nhs had to play along to help his clan's needs #thehobbitbadger

[ibijau]

thehobbitbadger replied to your link: A lamb in wolf's clothing - Chapter 2 - Ibijau -...

how much angst are we talking here? and will there be a happy ending? :P

decently angsty for now, but I am aiming for a happy ending someday

I’m such a sucker that event the awful bad timeline has a happy end planned ok

#thehobbitbadger #jau answers

[ibijau]

thehobbitbadger replied to your post: Second to last instalment of the Bad Timeline, and...

I’m not usually one for angst but I am loving the bad timeline way too much :P

I’m glad <3

for me it’s a huge case of ‘I’m writing this and enjoying the hell out of it, but I wouldn’t read it in a thousand years if someone else wrote that’ XD

#thehobbitbadger

[cakesandfail]

fahqu replied to your post: [[MOR] the older I get the more apparent it...

there’s nothing childish about knowing what you don’t want. that “you’ll change your mind later” is a load of crap

It is a huge steaming pile of crap, yes, and I wish more people understood that. I’ve known what I want- and what I don’t want- for a very long time and being secure in that ought to be respected.

thehobbitbadger replied to your post: [[MOR] the older I get the more apparent it...

I’m aro-ace and am definitely never getting married or having kids. But even among my allosexual friends most of them don’t want kids and I’m not sure any of them will ever get married. It might feel isolating if everyone around you seems to be doing all the traditional grown up stuff, but I think it helps to remember that actually fewer and fewer people are choosing to have kids or to get married so you’re not weird for those decisions.

See, I know that on a rational level, but I think it feels different at 31 with a long-term partner and a mortgage, even though it isn’t- the expectations on me, right now, in that context, are that the obvious next steps are marriage and babies, because TICK TOCK TICK TOCK THE BIOLOGICAL CLOCK IS RUNNING DOWN!!! Which, uh, I think mine broke, because I feel no sense of urgency or even mild interest. It just gets on my nerves that I’m constantly made to feel as though I should care.

#fahqu #thehobbitbadger #replies #at this point i'm just doing read mores to avoid spamming up everyone's dash lol