#things are just not goin well for me irl :(( & its not right for me to come on here & bring negative energy | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

miru667 · 2 years

Video

A video of wips for my onceler zine cover piece! This drawing took me 6 months to finish haha. Click the readmore if you’re curious to learn more about my process and all the refs and inspos I used (transcribed from [this twitter thread]). [CLICK HERE] to see the finished piece.

I guess I’ll go from left to right? :>

7212 is my #1 ship in the fandom so of course I had to include some interaction for them..I purposely shaped that piece of confetti into almost-a-heart 9.9 In this interaction OG onceler is sizing him up to be his poster boy. It was inspired by this joke hc from junior: https://miru667.tumblr.com/post/43633972614/truffulajam-you-there-me-sir-ive

The hose is from one of the lorax mini-movies but more specifically its from the nightblogging event in 2012, here’s an archive of a lot of the hose memes we created that night: https://oncelerswaterhose.tumblr.com/

He doesn’t actually have suspenders in the movie but they were a popular headcanon for him in 2012 plus they’re hot so I included them. It was important to me to include this transitional onceler in between vestler and suitler to remind us all that this is the same guy going thru different stages of his life.

Gloves in the back pocket is from concept art: https://miru667.tumblr.com/post/146926446017/early-once-ler-sketches-by-eric-guillon-part-5

I really love the way I drew and coloured the folds of his coattails here too, as well as the moss I added last minute onto the truffula tree trunk.

The frame started out as just a plain brown rectangle and I thought, now that's not very seussy, so I referenced the Too Big To Fail frame in the movie. I believe it took me two whole days to draw just the frame. :,) And the seuss portrait I just referenced from google images but it was a challenge too; I had to completely redraw it near the end to make him look more accurate.

Lorax holding up a portrait of Seuss and using it to guilt the Onceler was inspired by a gag in Osomatsu-san where the characters would apologize to a portrait of their irl creator Akatsuka when they felt like they were being a bad adaptation of his original work 😂😂😂 loved it.

But it was also inspired by a very powerful comic drawn by my friend Rachel: https://miru667.tumblr.com/post/92807755387/tsg I would say Rachel's art has been the biggest inspo for me in the past decade in both style and emotion, so I'm really happy I could include her influence into my piece like this.

I was SO happy I thought of a way to include these 2012 refs: -Complaint Box -☄☄☄ Waterballoon fight nightblogging event -gent's marriage to the fandom -ed helms finding out about oncest -Thneedville/Thornville High AU -WHO IS SWAG/askblog identity crisis nightblogging event -You Only Live Once(ler) -tiny chat parties -Camp Weehawken AU -tumblr anons/magic anons -normaler -Shakespeareler/"I must keep biggering" nightblogging event -Stay stupid, baby!

I wish I could've included more cuz these are still just above-water stuff in the fandom iceberg imo. If anyone wants me to explain more about any of these refs, feel free to ask!

The flip phone is from the deleted scene, "YER ALL GOIN TO JAIL": https://miru667.tumblr.com/post/153925999832/truffulajam-youreallgoingtojailmov-from

The bottom fake button on his suit is canon: https://miru667.tumblr.com/post/615761075955187712/miru667-you-know-your-life-has-hit-a-new-low

This is my fav interaction in the piece...you can see it as either aftermath onceler taking the hat off of biggering onceler to foreshadow his fall, OR you can see it as aftermath-ler taking off his OWN hat to crown biggering-ler as the fool, because he's learned what a fool he's been. And actually a 3rd interpretation is aftermath-ler telling biggering-ler "yes enjoy your happiness while you can, king" 😂

And then with old onceler's hand on aftermath onceler's back, an act of consolation...I think it's very important to be able to forgive ur past self for the stupid things you've done, or else how can you continue? How can you grow? I can guarantee that 10 yrs ago we ALL did stupid things in the fandom. I originally drew aftermath frowning but changed it to a smile because he's thankful for the lessons and he can still look back on things fondly. I feel the same as him and I hope others do too. For this interaction I was inspired by Pearl fanart, she's a comfort character of mine and has helped me thru so much: https://asteroidhyalosis.tumblr.com/post/188267156772 https://asteroidhyalosis.tumblr.com/post/623806330932805632

Biggering onceler’s side profile gave me THE HARDEST TIME. It was already January and I just COULD NOT get it to look right and I was ready to go take a 5 hour depression nap because of it but then my friend Edu saved the day ♥

Edu: @hybridkilljoy

Another friend contribution was the yellow bg. it was originally a boring flat gradient so Clara said "lmao what if I just gave you a yellow bg I painted to toss into ur file" because she had a rly good brush for it on procreate (and I was using paint tool sai and had nothing). i replied "oki" and then she just DOES IT..🥺♥

Clara: @clarabellumsart

idk where i'd be without my friends

I’m REALLY proud of this little area of my zine piece. The hand and blood is a ref to Truffula Flu, our zomb apocalypse AU. I had to redraw it twice to get it right. And I’ve drawn many a onceler chain but this is the BEST onceler chain I’ve EVER drawn. It took me many redraws to get it to look this way. Look at it just reaching out at you so fluidly..!! The lighting and the rust! Proud of me!!

The fallen truffula tree in the back...I really just thought "hey let's experiment with PAINTING" and went for it!! 😂 I wanted to pay tribute to my all time fav onceler fanart: https://miru667.tumblr.com/post/27320592159/ask-drawn-onceler-money-in-the-trees-lol-hey Whoever the mod of ask-drawn-onceler was, if you see this I hope you're doing ok!!

As you guys have probably gathered by now, nothing is ever too late to change for me. If I felt like I could redo something to be better, I'd DO IT. The tree is another example, I was rly bothered that it looked like tentacles (right) so I completely re-rendered it to be more soft and fluffy (left). What made me realize that I could do better was after drawing the trees here: https://miru667.tumblr.com/post/673766406272286720/early-spring-cleaning-part-2-drew-these-btwn I realized that actually, less is more, and that I had over-rendered the tree in my zine piece.

This was actually the first time I've EVER drawn old onceler, so I worked EXTRA hard...I hope I did him justice!! Every hair, every thread, every little thneed tuft was drawn with care. I even manually drew in the shadows for the stripes on his robe so they would look indented! And if you look closely in other screenshots, I also manually added shadows to every piece of thread that makes up the onceler suit stripes.

The LET IT GROW is in seuss font, but I didn’t type it, I drew the letters while mimicking the font’s style, then added edge lighting to make it look carved into the pot. Unfortunately we couldn’t keep the zine title in seuss font as well due to copyright restrictions and I think I might have died if I were to draw the title in seuss font too LMAO

The Audrey is of course intended to be movie Audrey but it's MY zine piece and I wanted to be a little self-indulgent.....so I drew some symbols on the plant pot representing my audrey oc, Audrey Grace. 🤫😇 She means everything to me. She is a direct result of the fandom and she keeps me in the fandom.

The blue kite originates from her mainverse askblog: https://askaudtree.tumblr.com/post/71630954595/do-you-do-all-the-chores-in-the-house-hows-your She later uses it as a marker for lerkim hopping in zomb au: https://audpocalypse.tumblr.com/post/178971798052/whats-that-blue-diamond-symbol-mean-its-on-your She's a knife-wielding zombie slayer and also a kazoo master (the tree straightener in the pot has the same striped pattern as her kazoo): https://miru667.tumblr.com/post/629448230317490176/pls-click-for-hi-res-today-is-my-audreys https://audpocalypse.tumblr.com/post/179181386907/have-you-ever-run-into-any-lerkims-that-were

And because of spending so much of her life in an apocalypse, she’s learned to appreciate the fleetingness of life, because who knows what’ll happen tomorrow? Every moment is precious. This is cherry blossom philosophy: https://notwithoutmypassport.com/cherry-blossom-meaning-in-japan/

I think it’s so cool that since it took 6 months, I would improve like halfway into working on this piece which made me have to go back and redo some things LOL XD. The smoke in the background from the cigar was also painted with inspiration from tofublock, whom I discovered during the latter half of those 6 months too: https://asteroidhyalosis.tumblr.com/tagged/tofublock https://asteroidhyalosis.tumblr.com/post/668656911468625921/will-you-watch-the-stars-with-me Look at the way they paint their clouds TTWTT so beautiful... I came across them while working on the zine and a lot of their art reminded me of my audrey so I was very taken!!

I positioned and coloured every piece of confetti with intent. The confetti idea itself I think was from Taylor Swift’s lyric video for 22 (Taylor’s Version): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9boiT64sm0Q&feature=youtu.be Again, inspiration that came to me while in the middle of working on the zine.

I composed the piece chronologically to mirror the rise and fall of our fandom experience, followed by the calmer, peaceful present days. Aftermath onceler in the piece represents the perceived death of the fandom but outsiders don’t realize we have AUs, we like characters other than onceler, we can extrapolate the story any which way...so that's all represented by the right side of the pic. We won’t stop biggering!

Thank you for reading if you made it this far.. I tried to include as much as I could into my piece so that hopefully everyone who is/was in the fandom feels seen.. Only the best for the Once-ler fandom, you know? And there’s actually so much more I can say about this piece but I’ll end it here.

#onceler #the lorax #miru art #tutorial #reference #oncelerzine

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superfics-forone · 3 years

Text

Just Friends

SUMMARY: Sam asks the group who they think are the “hottest” members of the team. You don’t make the cute for Bucky’s top five.

Bucky x TALL!Reader

W/C: 5,800

WARNINGS: angst, swearing (like two f bombs), cannon level violence, Bucky being an idiot (it’s a warning), physical insecurities, fake science

A/N: I wrote this because the top 5 situation actually happened to me IRL and when you don’t make someone you like’s list, it sucks. Also, this is in no way meant as being against people who are smaller! I am just a tall/plus size woman and sometimes that really makes you feel like you’re unattractive to people because you don’t fit the gender norm. Let me know what you think! I’m pretty new at this so I’d appreciate the feedback!

Also, HUGE shout out to @princessmisery666 for being so patient and supportive! Thank you for being my beta! Your comments were so incredibly helpful!

The best part about working with Bucky was that you got to see him everyday. The worst part was that you were constantly reminded that he wasn’t attracted to you.

You knew you were a good looking woman, people would often tell you that. It usually happened when you weren’t necessarily feeling your prettiest. Somehow that made it worse. Others would compliment you but he never would. Even when you knew you looked good- like you had put in extra effort and actually tried that day- still he would give you nothing.

You sat across from him in the common room looking at all the other Avengers wondering why he didn’t feel the same when you finally got your answer.

“Alright man,” Sam called out to the group. “Top five, let’s go.”

“Top five?” asked Clint, not sure if he wanted to know the answer. “Top five what?”

Everyone looked back to Sam, - “Top five on who you think is lookin’ most fine”.

“You want us to rate each other?” You asked incredulously.

“Naw, man!” Sam replied. “I want to know who you think are the top five most attractive! Male and female!”

You slunk back into the sofa, both curious and terrified of the conversation to come.

You heard huffs from the others but no one objected. Vision went first and of course he could only answer with; “I believe all of you are inherently lovely. I couldn’t possibly pick a top five of those who I find to be most attractive.” As soon as he finished and the room was no longer focused on him though he leaned over to Wanda and said something in her ear that made her blush.

You brought your cup up to your lips to hide your smile. You loved how happy they were after having been through so much heartbreak.

Sam went next, “Imma say, Wanda, Nat, Gamora’s got it goin’ on…for an alien…Hill - don’t tell her I said that- and…Y/N,” he said throwing you a wink.

You smiled but shook your head with a roll of your eyes. You knew the only reason he said your name was because you were in the room. He was trying to be kind. Men didn’t seem to be actively lining up to be with you…it might have something to do with them being intimidated by you being an Avenger but who could possibly know

“Sam you would think anything with legs that gave you the time of day was hot,” Bucky shot.

The others laughed but Sam shot back, “alright, Tin Man, who’s on your list? Okoye?”

“Yeah for one! I would be dead before I could make a move but sure! She’s dangerous and stunning!” He took a swig of bourbon as if he was done.

“Alright then who else?” Wanda leaned forward winking at you.

You shot her a warning look. You had only told her how you felt about Bucky once on a drunken night after finding out he had gone on date with another recruit. Jealousy had reared its ugly head and she could feel your angst that night. You had asked Wanda how; “A tiny little thing that would barely hold her own in the ring,” could possibly catch his eye. It was as if the only thing he saw you as was an ear to listen to his problems and a soldier he could rely on in the field. You had seen them together multiple times since then and every time it pained you more.

She was everything you weren’t. Barely five foot, two inches tall with a skinny frame to match, and a nicely formed backside. In reality you couldn’t be mad at Bucky. He deserved to be happy. He was your friend and you wanted that for him. You just wanted that particular happiness too.

“Okay, okay!” Bucky’s hands came up in surrender as he finished his drink and leaned back to think, He sat so close to you his left bicep of his folded arms brushed yours with every breath he took.“Okoye? Sure…uh… in no particular order…Wanda, Nat, Darcy, and the little woman, Kris, from reception.”

“It seems, Mr. Barnes”, said Vision, “that you prefer mates who are significantly smaller than you. I do believe that of that group, Wanda is the tallest one.”

“Which isn’t really saying much because I’m only five, six”, she complained.

“The perfect height my dear.” Wanda smiled at that and kissed Vision’s cheek .

You took another long sip of your drink as you registered what had been said. Your stomach soured as you finished the glass. Not so much from the alcohol as from the realization that the man who you had secretly been pinning over didn’t even list you as attractive enough to make his top five.

You felt like you knew why. It was just too much. You weren’t small and dainty like those on his list. You had big bones and a can do attitude. You wouldn’t take crap from people. And because you were so tall you could come off as intimidating…or so some men had told you.

“I’m going to get another drink,” You whispered to no one in particular.

But Sam really couldn’t read a room and he called you out. “No, no! Who’s on your list Y/N?”

“Oh no!” You said dryly. “I’d have to be much drunker for that conversation. For now, I'll keep my opinions to myself.”

You spotted Bucky’s surprised face before you made your way over to the bar. The conversation carried on behind you as you refilled your glass. Thoughts of Bucky’s revelation clouding your mind. You were never going to be good enough for him because you were just too big. Too tall. Too much. He liked the smallest, most petite women in the compound. Feeling your emotions swelling,you decided to grab the bottle and made your way quietly out of the room while the ruckus continued.

Once on your floor you closed the door behind you with a forceful slam, “FRIDAY!! Lock the door and don’t open it for anyone!!”

“Yes, Miss Y/L/N.”

The rest of the night was spent on the floor in your sweats drinking from your bottle of whiskey and feeling sorry for yourself and all the things you couldn’t be because of biology.

You weren’t sure if it was a drunken stupor or your imagination but at one point you could have sworn you heard a knock only for it to go away just as quickly.

…

The next day you had an awful hangover and didn’t get out of bed. Bucky came to your door for your normal morning run.

“Tell him I’m not going, Friday.”

“He would like to know why, Miss.”

“Tell him it’s my time of the month.”

“Your time of the month was last week, Miss.”

“Who’s side are you on, Friday? Just tell him I’m sick.”

“Very well, Miss.”

It was silent for a few moments and you had thought that would be enough to get Bucky off your back for now.

“Mr. Barnes would like to know if you’d like to see Dr. Cho, Miss.”

“Uuuugggghhhh,” you rolled out of bed and marched over, irritated that the one person you didn’t want to see was at your door.Pulling it open with a huff you practically screamed. “What?!?”

“Woah!” Bucky jumped back startled at your disheveled appearance and puffy eyes. “I just want to make sure you’re alright, doll. You didn’t come back last night and you never answered the door when I came to check on you.”

So there was a knock last night.

You couldn’t look him in the eye as your eyes filled with tears again, this time with shame. “I’m fine, Bucky.” You started shutting the door quickly and he stuck his hand on it preventing you from closing it again.

“Y/N…what’s…”

“Bucky, I just need some rest okay?” You cut him off, “I’m fine. I promise I’ll be right as rain tomorrow.” You smiled weakly.

Bucky searched your face as if trying to find what you weren’t telling him in your eyes. But you were an Avenger and you knew how to school your features to show nothing.

Bucky sighed and shook his head, “alright, doll. I’m here if you want to talk about anything.”

“Yes, fine,” you said pushing him out the door. Your eyes had flooded with tears again. You didn’t look up to see Bucky’s hurt and concerned face as you closed the door again and put your back to it.

You held your breath listening for his footsteps to retreat before sinking to the floor and crying.

…

The next day was an all out avoid Bucky day. You weren’t sure you could take the questions and worried looks he was sure to give you. Instead, you decided that what you needed was time away from such temptation. And so, you went in to ask Steve for an overseas long assignment.

“You sure about this one, Y/N. It’s a 9 month solo mission. It’s going to be long and it’s going to be lonely.”

“Yes. I’m sure. I need some time to myself.”

Steve looked at you with understanding and pity. He could see how you felt about Bucky even if he couldn’t get his best friend to see it as well.

“Alright,” he said, “suit up. You leave in 2 hours.”

South Africa wasn’t the worst assignment. It wouldn’t take long for you to get the information you needed. And the separation from Bucky would be good for you.

You finished checking your last weapon and loaded it as well as a pair of throwing knives, a gift from Bucky, into your duffle before looking around your room one more time.

You headed to the door and almost made it out until the picture of you and Bucky on your dresser made you stop. Picking it up you smiled at the memory of the minor league baseball game you’d attended together. You had won tickets and no one else was available that night. When you’d offered the tickets to Bucky you couldn’t believe that he said yes! It was the true start of your friendship, talking about life and how much it had changed for him but also how little it had changed for you. He couldn’t believe it when you started singing all the words to “I’ll never smile again”.

“You think I don’t know music? I’m quite cultured, Mr. Barnes!” You had said with a laugh.

“I never said you weren’t, sweetheart!”

Coming back out of your revelry with a start you put the picture back down on the dresser and turned to the door. You were going to get over this infatuation, even if it killed you. Supposedly time heals all wounds. Well you weren’t sure if there was ever going to be enough time but you could get distance.

…

Hours later Bucky came in to tell you about the relationship problems he was having with the girl from reception. She just didn’t seem to understand him and kept picking fights. You had become his confidant and had saved his relationship once before so would most likely be able to do it again.

He was almost to your room when he noticed your door was ajar. Slowing he moved closer and pushed it in silently. The room was neat and quiet. Your bed folded nicely as though it was always that way.

Bucky knew that you never made your bed until you were right about to get in it. Or unless you were going on a trip.

Checking carefully he started to notice things missing. Your favorite slippers were gone. Your tooth brush and favorite stuffed animal turtle were also missing. All of the things that you felt you had to have with you were gone.

Then he saw the picture frame on the dresser. Picking it up he too smiled at the memory, then frowned. It was still here. You almost always took this with you. Why was it still here but everything else you held of value was gone.

“Friday, where is Y/N?”

“Miss Y/L/N has volunteered for a mission, sir.”

“Where?”

“That information is classified.”

“Okay, when will she be back?”

“That information is classified.”

“Alright, who else went on the mission,” he asked hoping whoever it was would have your back.

“All other Avengers are currently in the compound.”

“So she went by herself?” Bucky fumed.

“That information is classified.”

“Damn robots!”

Bucky stormed out and found Steve in the kitchen.

“Where did you send her, punk!

Steve didn’t even look up from his newspaper, knowing exactly what his best friend was talking about.

“She’ll be fine, Buck. She just needs some time to herself.”

“So send her to Fiji! Not a solo mission!!”

“This is her call Bucky. You’ve got to trust her.”

Bucky spun on his heel and headed to the computer lab. He knew he was being irrational but if no one else was going to look after your well-being then he was going to have to do it himself.

It took him all day but he finally unencrypted the files for your mission. You were to carry out a recon mission in Port Elizabeth on a supposed Hydra base. It was a far cry from Fiji but you wouldn’t be in immediate danger.

Still he came in everyday to check in on your reports and find out how the events in the country were progressing. He had even convinced Torres to help him set up notifications to his phone if something were to go wrong. He had, very nicely, threatened him with knives if he didn’t set up Stark’s satellite to keep an eye on you.

After three weeks he was really starting to miss your company. Every time he went out with Kris from reception he realized that she just wasn’t as interesting as you. They didn’t have the same camaraderie and chemistry as the two of you did.

So when his phone dinged at 2:30am he looked at the notification. It was a satellite image of you on your apartment porch drinking coffee. You seemed at ease and calm at your small table. Your hair down and wearing a long red dress. He went to the live feed of the satellite but when he did you weren’t there.

Bucky refreshed the page again thinking it may be just an error. But his rising heartbeat made him think differently. When the screen came back he noticed the upturned coffee mug and the newspapers on the ground.

Bucky flew from his bed and raced down the hall to the command room. Steve and Tony were already there, still in their pajamas.

“…it’s not as if she has a tracker in her, Stark!”

“Well maybe she should! Maybe we should make it a standard issue! Everyone gets a tracker! Friday! Make a note!”

“Yes sir.” replied the AI.

“Tony, we need to focus on the…”

“Where is she?!” Bucky growled.

Both men turned around in surprise. Steve recovered first, his eyes sympathetic for his friend’s worry. “We’re not sure, Buck. These images were only taken 4 hours ago.” He clicked to zoom in closer, “but we did get this.”

He zoomed all the way into the kitchen window behind where you’d sat drinking coffee, where a face reflected in the glass. Bucky looked on in rage, hands in tight fists, as the image became clearer and Zemo came into focus.

…

You awoke with a start, unaware of your surroundings. You sat on a bed in a bare room with a single one way mirror. A metal chair sat by the wall and you noticed no handle on the door. Trying to piece together what had happened you recalled your last memory.

A beautiful morning, the sun shining on the water, a freshly brewed cup of coffee. You sat in your apartment in Port Elizabeth, a pain in your neck…

“Zemo,” you whispered.

“Ah, you’re awake,” said the speaker above you. “I’m sorry about the dramatics but it was necessary. You’re a very important piece of the puzzle.”

“Let me guess,” you said as you rolled your eyes. “You don’t like the way the world is being saved by the Avengers and you think you could do better.”

“Actually I want something else, мой дорогой. I need you.”

“What?” you cried befuddled. “Why on earth would you need me?”

“Do you know what TX-39 is?”

“Yes, I have an entire codex of arbitrary numbers logged away in my brain,” you retorted.

Zemo didn’t pause at your sarcasm. “TX-39 is the compound used to create nucleotides that bond onto nerve endings. By doing so they suspend brain signals stopping all neuro function and rendering the subject immoble. Something you have experienced first hand. By combining a nanotech inhibitor with this nerve ending your subject’s direct motor function is now open to...suggestions.”

You sat astounded as you registered what he had told you. You looked down at your hands but you didn’t feel different. There was no way something like this could work.

“What better way to get rid of a super soldier than to create your own?” Zemo said. You felt a slight buzz in your spine as you stood up quickly trying to resist. Running to the mirror you pulled back your arm, ready to punch your way out, but an inch from the glass your arm stopped. “Ironic that the Soldat will come to save you, only to be the one who needs to be saved.” With that you felt the electricity in your spine disappear and your body was your own again.

Frustration built within you as you sat back on the bed for a moment processing his statement. Your face became more and more incredulous until finally you burst out laughing. You continued laughing harder and harder at the absurdity of Zemo’s reasoning.

“You think I’m the one he is going to come after,” you laughed. “You think you picked the right mouse for your trap? You’re going to wait a long time if you think he’s going to come and get me.”

During your first few weeks away you had missed Bucky fiercely. Leaving him behind so abruptly had felt like severing a part of yourself, but the last few weeks had been good for you. You had forgotten what it was like to rely on yourself. You had grown into yourself again and had realized how little Bucky had actually cared for you when he never came to find you. He hadn’t so much as picked up the phone after you had left. It was as if you had never existed in the first place.

“Bucky doesn’t care about me,” you said sardonically. “He never has. We are barely even friends.You picked the wrong mouse, Zemo. ”

“We’ll see, дорогой,” and with a click he was gone.

Your brain shifted in and out of the conversation with Zemo. Looking down at your hands, you prayed it wasn’t true. You knew that what had happened at the window was real but you didn’t want to believe it. You had been turned into a weapon to hurt your friends. To hurt Bucky.

Crossing your arms over your chest you laid down on the bed, rolled over to face the wall, and cried.

…

Avengers Compound

“There is a five mile radius around Agent Y/L/N last known location,” said Fury. “Two man teams will sweep the area in a grid formation while the drones scan for energy signatures. Any questions?”

All those around the table sat silent, but nodded confirmation of their understanding of the objective. Fury looked around the room, “This mother fucker took one of ours and I wanna know why. Let’s get going.”

Bucky stood up from the table and made his way out of the room to the Quinjet hangar. Steve pulled on his arm before entering the plane. “I know what’s going through your mind right now Buck, but we are going to get her back”.

Bucky looked at the ground before raising his eyes to his friend. “He knew how to get to me, Steve. He always knows where to hurt me. He couldn’t use you. You’re too difficult to overpower. So he had to pick her. I just,” Bucky wasn’t sure how to finish his thought. Words never came easily to him and he wasn’t sure he could really express what he was feeling. “I just want her safe.”

After you had left Bucky felt hollow inside. He hadn’t realized how much joy you brought to his day with your smiles and jokes. Always knowing what to say, or at least, what he needed to hear. Your departure made him realize he needed you. Boarding the jet Bucky knew that no matter what happened he was going to tell you how he felt.

…

The team had been sweeping through the city for what felt like hours and there still hadn’t been any developments. Walking through another alleyway Bucky scanned the cobblestone streets. He was beginning to lose hope at ever finding you at all when he saw an uneven line in between two buildings.

Pressing his comm link he called out, “Steve, I’ve got something. I’m going to check it out.”

“Bucky, wait for backup. We’ll come to you.”

Feeling along the wall Bucky felt a draft between the cracks. Unholstering the gun at his hip he pushed against the wall feeling it give way.

“I’m going in. Follow my location.”

“Bucky, wait!” Steve called.

Bucky ignored his calls and continued down the dimly lit hall. The walls opened up to a staircase leading down to a command room. The musky scent of decay and scotch filled Bucky’s nostrils.

“Privet, Soldat,” Zemo called from the darkness.

Bucky whirled around to find nothing.

“Have you come for your little mouse?”

Still searching, Bucky said nothing as the sound came from a different corner of the room.

“Have you realized how much you miss her?”

Bucky circled again, coming up to a window.

“I wonder what it is? Is it her sweetness that draws you? Or her willingness to see you for more than the killer you are?”

Bucky frowned. Zemo was playing with him.

“Or have you realized that her fire is what draws you to her? She does have a talented tongue. I’ve seen her put it to good use,” Zemo provoked. “I have enjoyed having her in my company, but it seems you really never appreciated her spirit, did you?”

Bucky continued searching the room as Zemo continued his monologue. Coming up to the computer he saw a paused video feed. It played as soon as he stepped forward.

Bucky saw you in a room, still in your red sundress. Your hair was matted and you had the look in your eye of anger and exasperation. When you spoke, Bucky felt the wind rush out of his lungs.

“Bucky doesn’t care about me,” you said sardonically. “He never has. We are barely even friends.”

“A pity she never saw you care, but I suppose it’s only fair that you tell her now.”

The door beside the window clicked open with a beep. You came out of the cell with a look of wary surprise on your face. “Bucky?”

“Now is your moment, Sergeant Barnes. Why not tell her how you feel before it's too late,” called Zemo.

Bucky holstered his gun and walked toward you. “Y/N? Are you okay? Come on, let's get out of here.”

He grabbed your hand and turned to go but you were rooted to the spot. Your breathing became heavy as you felt the tingling sensation in your spine again.

“Bucky, I need you to leave,” you cried, dread dripping from your voice.

“What? No,sweetheart, come on! I’m not leaving you.”

“Bucky, I…” you started.

“Last chance to declare yourself, Soldat.”

Looking up in anger, Bucky yelled. “Shut up, Zemo. I’m not performing for you-” Bucky’s head turned in surprise as you punched him across the face. “What the hell, Y/N?”

“It wasn’t me!” you cried as you dropped and kicked his legs out from under him.

Bucky rolled over quickly to pick himself up as you followed him swinging punches at his head and kicks to his stomach. Your moves were both erratic and efficient as they landed multiple times. It was all Bucky could do to block your assault and move out of the way.

“This isn’t me!” you cried again between punches. “Zemo is controlling me with nanotech!”

Bucky threw up an arm to block your punch before flipping you around by your arm and pressing you to the wall. He didn’t want to hurt you but he was pretty sure that it wasn’t the most comfortable position.

“It’s okay, Y/N. We’re going to get you out of this.”

Your foot kicked his leg and you pushed yourself over and around his head and away from the wall. Grabbing the knife at his hip as you slipped out of his grip, you threw it into his thigh.

Bucky looked at you in surprise and annoyance. “Sorry!” you winced. Pulling the knife from his leg he tossed it to the floor.

“Look, Y/N. I’m not going anywhere, but try not to kill me, okay?”

“It’s not like I’m doing this on purpose Bucky!” you huffed as you charged at him.

“Well I’m just trying to get you out of the problem you put yourself in!” You had grabbed another knife and went to stab him. Bucky caught the knife and twisted your hand but the knife snagged your dress and tore the skirt as you fought to wrestle it away.

Your eyes flared with anger and the next punch you threw had a little extra heft in it.

“That I put myself in? How about you, Mr. Barge-into-a-room-with-no-back-up!”

“Oh, I’m sorry, I thought you liked being saved! Although you’re one to talk! You came on a mission without backup!” Bucky rolled across the computer console out of the way of your next kick, getting agitated at your attitude.

“Because I needed space!” you yelled as you followed him around the computer desk.

“Space? Space from what?” Bucky yelled back, actually throwing a punch that you easily evaded.

“You! You idiot!” it burst out of you as you came up swinging before pushing him to the ground.

Bucky looked up at you with his eyes wide. You had him straddled under your legs. Bucky brought his arms up to block your punches while he tried to talk to you.

“Why would you need space from me? I don’t understand. You left without warning, without saying goodbye! Your mission was classified so I had to hack F.R.I.D.A.Y to even find out where you were!”

Your body was starting to fatigue from the strain of the fight as you continued to land blow after blow. You were fit and well trained but because your body was not your own you were blowing through energy rapidly. Your breaths were coming in short gasps as your chest heaved at each punch. If you kept this up, you weren’t sure how much time you would have before your body gave out entirely.

“Y/N, you left a huge gap! You were my best friend and then you were gone! You wouldn’t even talk to me before you left! You didn’t tell me you were leaving. I couldn’t even call you because the mission was supposed to be classified!”

Maybe it was the fatigue, maybe the hopelessness you felt, but you gave him everything you had left as you pummeled into him. Frustration over your situation, frustration at him, frustration at yourself built up inside you.

“I WILL NOT BE YOUR STAND IN! I will not be second best. I can’t look on anymore as you find someone smaller, cuter, littler to fit perfectly into your life! I deserve to be wanted! I deserve to be desired!” you screamed at the man beneath you as tears streamed down your cheeks.

Bucky finally bucked his hips and flipped you under him, pinning your hands to the ground next to your head.

“Get off of me! Let me go!” you had finally had enough. The damn had broken and your emotions and insecurities raged inside you. Your body pulled and twisted to break free from his grip.

“You do deserve to be desired,” Bucky said calmly as he caged you beneath him. “You are nobody's stand in. You’re perfect just as you are.” He wanted to say more but it was all he could do to keep you pinned under him.

The team burst down into the control room to see you openly weeping and Bucky on top of you.

“Nat, I need you to put an electric burst in my arm.” Bucky said looking up.

“I’m sorry, you what?” asked Nat.

“Just do it!” he said as you fought harder against him.

With a nod from Steve, Nat waved her baton and zapped Bucky’s arm causing both of you to scream in pain. When your body finally stopped seizing, the lack of adrenaline and the pain and fatigue caught up to you and you passed out in Bucky’s arms.

“You want to explain why I just pushed fifty thousand volts through you two?”

“Zemo infected her with some kind of nano tech. She hasn’t been in control this entire time.”

Steve scanned around the room. “Alright team, fan out. See if you can find out where Zemo went. I want teams down here with sat links up in 30 minutes.”

Bucky circled the gears around in his arm to get it up and running again before scooping you carefully off the ground.

“Buck, get her on the next jet out. Dr. Cho and Banner will be waiting for you to get back.”

…

For the second time you woke up in an unfamiliar place, and struggled to get your bearings. You felt like you’d been run over by a pick up truck and tumbled through a dryer.

Feeling slowly returned to your hands as your eyes opened and your vision cleared. You were in one of the medical rooms at the compound you realized.

“Look who decided to wake up,” said a gruff voice.

Turning your head you saw Bucky sitting in the chair beside you. He looked fresh and his eyes twinkled at you.

“Bucky,” you croaked as you tried to sit up.

“Woah there. You just relax. Your body is still trying to catch up from Zemo’s nanites.”

You slumped back down in the bed as Bucky leaned forward to take your hand.

“You had me worried there for a minute, doll. You’ve been sleeping for days. Wasn’t sure when you were going to pull through.”

“You doubt me, Barnes?”

“Not for a second, sweetheart, but I sure as hell missed you.” Bucky smiled, then looked down for a moment as if trying to find the right words. “We need to talk about why you left, Y/N.”

“No, Bucky, I...it doesn’t matter.” You say looking away. “It’s not important.”

“I don’t know, I’d say you thinking you don’t matter to me is pretty important.” You turned to look at him sharply, mouth open in a small gasp. “And I’d also say that you thinking I don’t find you desirable is pretty important too.”

You sat in shock as he spoke, not wanting to break the way you had during your fight.

“Y/N, you are perfect. You knew me before I even knew myself. You light up the whole room just by being in it. You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. You are strong, independent, kind, and gentle. You’re like a tall Asgardian goddess. Every inch of you is beautiful. I thought back to the last time we talked...before you left, and I realized why you did. I know why you thought I wasn’t attracted to you. That night, Sam’s list,” he paused as if pained at the memory, “I didn’t add you because...well, because I was so confused at how I was feeling. You were my friend. I didn’t realize till it was too late that I was already falling in love with you. And I most definitely didn’t want to give Sam anymore ammunition.”

You looked up at him sharply when he dropped the L word.

Bucky stood to reposition himself on the edge of your bed. Taking your face in his hands he leans forward until your foreheads barely touch. “I didn’t want to ruin things with you. You were my friend. You were perfect and I thought you deserved better so I ran to find something that was everything you weren’t. You are my perfect fit. You are just right. You are the only person I want. Please tell me you’re mine. Please tell me I haven’t lost you.”

You brought your hand up to rest over his as you let his words wash over you.

He wanted you. He thought you were beautiful. All of you. All of the parts people had told you were too much: your height, your attitude, your independence - he wanted it all.

You did something that you wanted to do for months, you brought your lips up to his softly and gave him a chaste kiss. “I was always yours Bucky,” You pulled his hands down and pushed him away to look into his eyes, “but I won’t be taken for granted anymore. I shouldn’t have to leave for you to want me. I shouldn’t have to be gone for you to realize what you had. I left for a reason. It was to find peace with myself. I realized that I didn’t need your approval. I didn’t need your desire to be whole. I won’t settle for someone who can’t see what’s right in front of them. I know my worth.”

Bucky looked at you sorrowfully as he held onto your fingers, memorizing their shape. “I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I never meant to make you feel like you weren’t enough.”

“I know, but it happened. I don’t need you to be happy, Bucky...” Bucky hung his head in dejection. “...But I do want you.”

Bucky looked up at you sharply to find your eyes full of love and warmth. You wanted him. Even after all that happened - how he forced you away, how he made you feel like you weren’t good enough, you were still willing to forgive him. You wanted him even with all his faults.

You brought him closer for another kiss and savored the way his lips fell across yours. Breaking away to look up at him you said what you had been holding in for months, “And I love you too.”

Tags: @princessmisery666 @dreamwritesimagines

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky fic #avenger reader #angst #tall girl problems

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bmpmp3 · 2 years

Note

Do you have any tips for drawing bodies from multiple angles?

WROTE A LOT SORRY its under a cut!

honestly i dont have the most practice with it since a good 70% of what i draw is characters wait up standing looking 3/4s left or right orz BUT some things that helped with the few interesting poses i draw once every fiscal quarter IS.....life drawing orz

specifically life drawing sessions where you do a bunch of quick gestural figures (like a 60 second timer each pose) at the beginning and then slowly increase the time for later poses, like 2 minutes, then five, where you slowly increase the amount of detail and rendering each pose, and then one or two long 10 minute ones where you go all out. i think that kinda structure helps a lot to 1) warm you up and get loosey goosey with ur lines and 2) get in the zone to think about how bodies work without overwhelming urself - like in the 1 minute sketches you could basically only get a weird stick figure, in the 2 minute ones maybe you might get a little more definition in the sillhouette, at the 5 minute poses you got some folds of the flesh implied with a few lines and a bit of hatching, and by the 10 minute ones ur really thinking about how the different parts of the body all interact because you already did some practice (the previous poses) if that makes sense?

ALAS we are in a world situation where cramming 40 people in a room to silently draw one naked person for three hours is not......happening (at least not where i live) so for the past couple years ive had to make do with online resources, which arent half bad! theyre not quite the same, for me at least (i think in person i can see more interesting angles) but they do the job! here's some I've used:

http://reference.sketchdaily.net/en

https://line-of-action.com/practice-tools/figure-drawing

https://quickposes.com/en

https://youtu.be/mNNSwITdPIM (linking this channels clothed references so no one gets a surprise titty in the face but normally i personally use nude references) (although recently ive been using some clothed references as well just because i realized im so out of practice drawing clothes hsjlkfBJKLFJSFKLD)

figure drawing and life drawing and especially gesture drawing is also something thats kinda tricky to learn if no one ever taught you (and honestly its tricky if someone DID teach you lol) so maybe someday i'll get around to trying to explain what ive learned myself if that could help someone

ive tried using 3d models but ive never foudn them that useful, probably for the same reason i prefer irl models to pictures (easier to see whats goin on) BUT sometimes it can help as a rough guideline if ur doing a weird angle youve never done before!!

SPEAKING of guidelines. guidelines are ur friend. guidelines r ur lifeblood. guidelines will always help even if u dont follow half of them they are SO helpful - I OFTEN find myself kinda skipping them, like you can see here in this drawing i havent erased the sketch from yet that i drew a circle and then a line for shoulders and gave up (probably impatient lol):

BUT guidelines can help so much~ when im drawing a full pose i'll usually have guidelines that really are no more than stick figures like basically like:

stick figures with dots for joints and maybe some rough lines here and there like it doesnt need to be nice or perfect since its just gonna get erased anyway~ it helps me keep track of how bones work hjfsdskjvfdfs

OH and artist mannequins.....like 3d models theyve also never done me any good like those wooden ones? I hate em theyre so stiff and i dunno what to do with them BUT.....okay...action figures? not bad....like maybe not so much with anatomy but if you have a doll or action figure with good articulation you can kinda use that to help out with funky poses sometimes!! like i have this one gundam and honestly....even though its a mecha with a giant mecha dong or whatevers going down there its like....not a horrible mannequin for poses jfksdlfjrfkehjklsd

WITH REGARDS TO foreshortening.......................................we are all on our own with that one orz LIKE i have tried every trick in the book, every funky tip and method and technique and none have worked for me so i just wing it jhkDmFJKDLS WELL actually having like a page of really sloppy loose stick figure sketches where you experiment with proportions helps a lot!! i do that with weird poses or angles, like dont worry about about how it looks HELL unfocus ur eyes. unfocus ur eyes. i do that all the time while drawing and its great it helps you see the big picture and the silhouette without focusing too much on one thing~

anyway yeah i dunno i guess a lot is just experimentation but hopefully some of these resources might be useful!!

#ask #wrote so much to ultimately say 'i dunno lol' sorry #HOPEFULLY some of it can be helpful tho!!

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fific7 · 3 years

Text

Dangerous and Divine - Part 20

Billy Russo x Reader

Summary: Billy Russo is an itch you don’t want to scratch. But he’s all over you like a rash.

A/N: This does not follow canon, it’s mainly fluff & lemon zest 🍋 Hopefully you’ve guessed by now that is my “Billy Russo Deserves Real Love AU” as I totally refuse to accept what happened in S2! The GIF is from Exposed, unreleased pilot show in case you’re wondering 😌... Billy vibes.

Warnings: 18+ NSFW due to sexual content including unprotected* sex between consenting adults. Some drinking & swearing.

*Irl, please don’t go wild in the country without protection.

(My GIF)

You’d just realised that - despite his little caveman episode earlier on - you didn’t ever want any man except Billy in your life.

Still gazing into his dark chocolate eyes, you heard yourself saying, “I think I’ll have that ring, please.”

You really wished you’d had your phone in your hand to take a photo of Billy’s face, because it was what they call ‘a picture’.

Never had you seen his mouth drop open so wide. He gaped at you for what felt like minutes, until he stuttered, “Th... the ring???” You nodded, “Yeah.”

He grabbed your hand and stood up, moving quickly out of the booth and dragging you along with him. Glancing at the waitress, who was looking very surprised, he said happily, “Sorry, miss. We’re gonna have to leave. Sorry ‘bout that.” She shrugged and turned away as Billy rushed to the door, you in tow.

Once outside you huffed, “Billy! Slow down! And what about lunch?!” “Nah, nah, nah. Lunch’s gonna have to wait!” “But I’m starving!” “Angel, I’ll get you lunch soon, I promise ya. Right now? I need to get you back to the apartment. Get that ring on your finger ‘fore you change your mind!”

He continued moving along the sidewalk at speed, gripping your hand tightly almost like he thought you’d try to get away. You were beginning to pant slightly as he was going at such a rate, his long legs eating up the sidewalk, and you laughed breathlessly, “Seriously, Billy, slow down!” He dropped back ever so slightly, “Nearly there, angel,” he grinned at you.

Eventually you arrived back at his apartment, Billy throwing open the door and then slamming it behind the two of you. Just as well he doesn’t have neighbours up here, you thought, otherwise they wouldn’t be very happy.

The next second, Billy’s mouth was on yours in a fiery kiss. He broke away, “Wait there, wait there!” He almost bounced over to the kitchen table and grabbed the ring box. Meanwhile, you were smiling at his goofy schoolboyish enthusiasm. Then he was back in front of you and dropping to one knee again, but this time looking happy as a clam. The ring box was held up towards you, open on this occasion, and its occupant sparkled at you as it caught the light.

A bit out of breath, he said your name in a serious tone before continuing, “....I’ve said all this to you before, but I’ll say it over and over again. As many times as you need me to say it. I want you in my life.... I’ll always want you in my life, angel. I love you so much it hurts, and I can’t be without you.” The dark eyes stared intently into yours, “Will you marry me? Please?”

This time you reached out and stroked the hand which was holding the ring box, “Yes, Billy.... I will.”

The smile which appeared on his face would’ve put the sun to shame. He leapt up, fumbling a bit as he took the ring out of the box, taking hold of your hand and sliding it onto your waiting finger. It fitted perfectly. How’d he manage that? you thought.

But when you met Billy’s eyes they were full of tears. You immediately reached up and stroked his face, “Billy.... you’re crying.” He sucked in a big breath and wiped a hand across his eyes, pulling you into his arms and just holding you close.

“Thank you,” he whispered next to your ear. “I really hope you don’t feel like I pressurised you into this, angel. It means so much to me that you said yes. But just ‘cause I wanted it so bad doesn’t mean I ignored what you said before. Hey, we can still get to know each other while you’re wearin’ that ring on your finger. I just wanted something that said to the world you’re mine.”

“Big sap,” you smiled against his chest. He chuckled, “Yeah, I’ve already admitted I am,” before tipping your chin up with one long finger. His lips hovered over yours, “You’re my fiancée now.” You nodded, “Yes I am.” His mouth gently met yours and he kissed you... softly, slowly, with love.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

After a prolonged and passionate kissing session on Billy’s sofa, you two finally made it back out for lunch. Which mightily pleased you, as you were absolutely starving by now. Billy had your hand in his and he was happily swinging both your arm and his backwards and forwards as you two walked back to the same diner you’d been in earlier.

He’d asked if you wanted to go elsewhere, but you just couldn’t face going even a little bit further away - you were sure you’d faint from hunger if you did.

The same waitress looked round from where she was leaning on the counter as you and Billy went back in, and tracked you over to the same booth you’d occupied before. Whipping out her notepad and pen, she was once again drinking in Billy with her eyes and ignoring you so a bit pettily, you picked up the menu with a flourish so that the diamonds in your ring flashed as they caught the light.

Her eyes were drawn to it - as you’d expected them to be - and widened quite noticeably. Billy was smirking at you, as he knew exactly what you were doing. He repeated almost the same thing he’d said earlier, “And my fiancée will have.....”

You hid a grin and ordered steak and chips, and Billy smiled “I’ll have the same,” at the waitress, before switching his gaze back to you a millisecond later. She looked at you, her mouth set in an irritated line and turned on her heel without another word. “And two beers, please,” you called after her. “Okay,” she said over her shoulder. You grinned over at your fiancé - your stomach leapt as you thought of him as that for the first time - “Y’know, if she worked for me, I’d fire her.” Billy nodded, smirking, “I know you would, angel. And not just ‘cause she’s got the hots for your fiancé.”

You swiped the menu at his his head, and he ducked out of the way with a joyous chuckle. You could tell that Billy was almost incandescent with happiness, and you felt glad that you’d made him really smile again.

While waiting on your food, you had a ‘brilliant’ idea. With Billy watching on with an amused smirk on his face, you took a photo of your ring and sent it to Karen.

About 10 seconds later, your phone rang and you answered it to a long loud shriek of “Ohmygod-Ohmygod-Ohmygod!” “Hi Karen,” you replied, holding the phone away from your ear and smiling at Billy.

She took a breath before saying, “So you did it! What happened to slowing down and waiting a little bit, then?!” You laughed, putting the phone on speaker, “I came round to Billy’s way of thinking.” You heard a chuckle from her, then Frank’s voice in the background, “Whass goin’ on?” Karen filled him in on the new development, he yelled something unintelligible and then suggested you all meet up for a celebratory drink. “Did you hear that?” asked Karen, “Wanna meet up for a drink?”

You looked over at Billy with a raised eyebrow, he nodded, so you said to Karen you’d meet the two of them at a bar halfway between the two neighbourhoods.

After consuming your late lunch faster than the speed of light, you and Billy headed out from the diner (you couldn’t resist giving the waitress the brightest smile as she frowned over at you while Billy paid) and walked to the bar to meet your two friends. Just as you approached it, a body slammed into you and two arms got you in a bear hug. Initially freezing in shock, you relaxed as you heard Karen squealing into your ear.

You managed to extricate yourself and as you did so, she grabbed your left hand, pulling it up to her face and squealing again, “Oh...! oh my god, it looks so good on you!” Grinning, you replied, “Why thank you,” as you made your way into the bar. Heading to an empty table, Frank went to the bar and ordered a bottle of champagne, returning to the table with it in an ice bucket. “Didn’t really see Frank as a champagne kinda guy,” you whispered to Karen. She and Billy grinned as Frank said. “I heard that!” and you looked at him apologetically, “C’mon, Frank, when was the last time you drank champagne?” He smiled, but a bit sadly, “At my wedding.”

Oh no, you thought, feeling instantly guilty. However Frank laughed now, “But if this isn’t a good time to take my second hit of champagne, I don’t know what is!” He glanced fondly over at Billy, who seemed to have a permanent smile on his face, then back at you, shaking his head and smiling, “You two.... I can’t keep up with you!”

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

After several pleasant hours of drinking, chatting and laughing, you’d all eventually left the bar and gone your separate ways. Billy was now mildly tipsy, and insisted on walking down the street with both arms wrapped right around you. Which was fine until you met people coming in the other direction, meaning you had to dodge round them in an awkward dance, pulling Billy this way and that while he just clung onto you like an extra-large koala bear.

Back at his place, you were amused to see Billy’s eyes beginning to close drowsily, so despite all the filthy promises he’d been whispering into your ear the entire walk back, you two ended up just falling into bed and going to sleep.

You weren’t sure how many hours later, but you started to surface from your deep sleep as you suddenly became aware of hands on your breasts and something hard between your legs. Your eyes slowly opened to see Billy’s big dark eyes looking down into yours and then his hand found its way to your ring finger, bringing it to his lips and kissing it. Billy had somehow managed to part your legs and manoeuvre himself between them while you were sleeping on your side. Realising that Billy was already inside you and beginning to thrust, you whispered, “Billy, you cheeky big devil!!! I’m not awake yet,” but you only heard a low laugh from him as he carried on making love to you.

He was nuzzling into your neck, kissing and licking so you decided to take what was yours and grabbed two handfuls of his hair, pulling on it. He laughed out loud, “I guess you get to do that whenever you like now,” and thrust extra deep, making you gasp. “Definitely,” you managed to say as he rolled you over onto your back and pulled your knees up. His lips moved to your breasts, and your head went back onto the pillows as his tongue did its best work.

Suddenly he hit your sweet spot, and you hauled on his hair like you were trying to rein in a runaway horse, hearing an answering “Ow!” from him. You were just smirking to yourself when your climax hit you, and your mind went blank as you became completely immersed in it. Billy kept up his fast pace until you felt him shudder and release into you, his mouth biting down on your shoulder.

He moved onto his back, but somehow managing to stay inside you for the moment even as he softened. “Sweetheart.... you know I’m happy that you like my hair, but I truly don’t wanna be bald!” he laughed as he tried to get his breath back.

“I’ll buy you a wig!” you replied, “...sorry, Billy... not gonna stop pulling your hair, you know I’m not.”

Billy smiled lazily over at you, eyes staring into yours as he pulled slowly out of you, saying happily, “Yeah, angel, don’t worry... I know you’re not!”

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

After breakfast, which involved a certain amount of kissing as well as the food items, you said to Billy that you needed to go shopping. You were just finishing a catch-up text with Jake, and noticed Billy reaching for his jacket. “No!” you blurted out, and he looked over at you in confusion and with a slightly hurt look on his face.

Billy seemed to need to be physically attached to you right now; he couldn’t stop stroking, touching, hugging, kissing you (with some licking thrown in there for good measure), so he looked really disappointed that you were insisting on going on your own. “I’ve just got a couple of extremely boring things to pick up, poppet and I don’t want to inflict that on you,” you soothed, going over to him for yet another long kiss.

“Okay, sweetheart,” he grumbled, “...how long you gonna be?” You stroked his face, “Not long, I promise.” A slightly happier look on his face, he sprawled out on the sofa and switched on the TV, so you sang out, “Bye!” and made your escape, a satisfied little smirk on your face.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

Twenty minutes later, you were in Harry Winston’s Fifth Avenue store. The sales assistant was looking at you as if you’d been let out of a psychiatric unit for the day. You’d just handed her a ring made of out of a sliver of Post-It note, rolled up and sellotaped together. She took it from you, holding it between two fingers as if it might bite her.

You sighed, and decided to explain the situation to her as otherwise you didn’t think she’d take you seriously. “Look, my fiancé got me this ring....” extending your rock-laden finger towards her, “... but it was a complete surprise.” She now gave you a warm smile, recognising one of their very expensive engagement rings.

“And I want to get him a ring,” you carried on, “...and I want it to be a surprise for him too. Had to pretend I was just idly wrapping scrap paper round his fingers while I was watching something on Netflix.” It did look like something a kindergarten kid might’ve made, but you were quite proud of your improvised way of finding out Billy’s ring size.

Now she was really getting into it, leading you to a display case of big chunky men’s rings. “I’ve got something in mind, but I’m not sure you’ll have it in stock yet.” She gave you a quizzical look, and you described a ring you’d noticed recently in a fashion magazine; a fairly thin matt black titanium band, with two ultra-thin strips of platinum running round each edge. You knew that one of those chunky ones just wouldn’t look right at all on Billy’s long, slim finger.

She gave you a huge smile, “We’ve just launched some new collections, and that’s one of them! - our Midnight range. Please wait here, madam, and I’ll be right back.”

Soon you were on your way back uptown to Lenox Hill, and this time you were the one with a ring box hidden away out of sight.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

As you let yourself into the apartment and hung up your jacket by the door, you noticed that Billy had dozed off on the sofa. You loved watching Billy sleep, so perched on the edge next to him and stroked back a couple of strands of hair which had strayed onto his forehead.

He awoke at your touch, smiling sleepily up at you, “Angel, you’re back...”

You took hold of his left hand, and scrabbled around in your bag for the ring box. “Billy.... you remember you said you wanted something to show the world I belonged to you?” He gazed back at you warily, as if he thought you might’ve changed your mind while you were out. “Uh... yeah?”

“Well, snap!” you said, finally finding the box, opening it and then sliding the black band onto his ring finger.

Billy’s eyes widened, and mouth opened in surprise. “Wow!” he said, sitting up and looking at it closely, “I love it!” You breathed a sigh of relief: some guys didn’t even like wearing their wedding bands, never mind an engagement ring. “So you’ll wear it?” you asked. He nodded, “Uhuh, course I will, angel!”

He turned his hand this way and that, and you admired how good the slim band looked on his finger.

His dark eyes met yours, and he gave a low chuckle, “Ha, see...? Now you’ve got me on that leash, sweetheart!”

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

@blackbirddaredevil23 @galaxyjane @omgrachwrites @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead @ourloveisforthelovely @swthxrry

#ben barnes #billy russo #billy russo x reader #billy russo fanfiction #billy russo imagine

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binniesthighs · 3 years

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THAT TEACHER REALLY HAS TO WATCH THEIR BACK GAVE US A TEST I DIDNT EVEN KNOW WE HAD ONE BUT HOW DARE HE DISRESPECT CATS

I got seungmins skzoo right but I saw jeongins live where he showed them and this might just be me but they are a bit small I don’t know why but I thought they’d be a bit bigger than that.

should all (legal) stays get a pregnancy test cause we MIGHT WE NEVER KNOW WITH THESE MEN

Y/n is trying her hardest but it......it is definitely something she needs to work on 👀

Speaking of two tails I WOULD BUT IT ITS SO GOOD AND WELL WRITTEN plus all these links between life and the story MY HEAD ARE YOU SECRETLY Y/N CAUSE I THINK YOU ARE - 🌹

(We are not fighting I’m just stating facts and I told seungmin and he said you’re lying and that you’re the cutest 😤😝🥺)

((ALSO CONGRATULATIONS ON 800 FOLLOWERS IM SO PROUD OF YOU, YOU DESERVE EVERYSINGLE ONE OF THOSE. I’m also happy that this has been able to become a sort of safe place and I hope it stays that way for as long as you continue with it MWAHHHHHHHHHH 😘❤️🥺))

🌹my darling!! Eeeee stop stop imma get emotional and help you always give me such a laugh 😂

And SKZOO ahhh they are too cute I’ve been seeing the same thing about them being smaller than expected but I’m still 🥺 I’m like 🤏 close to getting Leebit F R I C K

as I’m sure you’ve seen, imma need me one of them tests after all these Clio pics 😳

Hehe I’ll give ya another ~insider fact~ hehe so for both 2T and HS I wanted to make the MCs relatable to what irl fans might be like so I went with tropes that fanfic writers and fanartists could relate to👉👈 I also thought it would be kinda funny and to make someone so close to home the MC 😂

Lastly thank you so very much 🥺 I am so grateful for all of the love and support I have received on here from all of you and of course you 🌹, and my lovely anons it keeps me goin’ day to day!!!! I’m so honored that y’all can’t find a safe place in my works as well 💕

#much much love ❤️#asks #binniesthighs 💌#🌹anon

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tslasvegas · 3 years

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Episode 4: “I'm sorry Daddy, I've been very naughty.” - Keegan

Dan and JAKE! A WORD IN MY OFFICE PLEASE! WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS.

Wow! Today was A Day to say the least. I feel like boo boo the fool with how things went down today, but hopefully, I can recover from that now that there’s a new tribe. I’m excited to get to know new people, but sad to see my old alliances have to come to an end. I guess we’ll see what happens

Finally a swap and golly 5 OG Palazzo! I really hope this works in our favor. Kinda nervous for Joey and Stephanie tho because now they are in the minority of their tribe. I do hope they’ll find a way to survive till merge

LMFAO IM... watching the tribal council for the other tribe and I'm SORRY??? Who the fuck is Jake S he is the most condescending man I've ever seen in my entire life YIKES. Anyways this swap is nice.. I think I've got a good group, I really hope we win the next few immunities because I 1) really dont want to see Rachael on this tribe and 2) i want to try and rebuild my um. tattered relationships. I did the best I could in the challenge for tonight, I'll try to come back tomorrow a little more renewed cus I'm kinda wiped out from today's events. Now that my tribal council cherry has been popped for this Org its time to go crazy woop

So good not to check Luxor anymore!

youtube

Well last tribal went fine, I got to see what was in the Prize Vault which is awesome; now I have a better idea of the twist. Big problem though- Our swap put me in the minority. I was running Luxor and had a core 4, now they have 5 OG Pink so they can pluck us off, one at a time. I went from drivers seat to getting driven over. We need to win the challenge, so I'm gonna go ham in winterbells and hope to pull it out.

We swapped! I think I made a confessional already, but honestly I don't remember. I gave Livingston some of my chips so he can go visit the vault after the immunity challenge. We'll see what is in there and for how much, and maybe snatch up some real nice items to help us out. I've also got Andrew on my side, which is great and he's apparently quite tight with Pat, which is fantastic. Mo is a pretty decent dude and I've been talking with Jake a lot today. Things are going alright. I just hope we can win this challenge.

Phew, while the swap was not ideal. I was really liking my tribe, we were kind of quiet but individually everyone was great and we also kicked butt at challenges! Anyway, the swap with numbers wise not great, but I know Xavi from a previous game and we have a solid relationship, I hope he and John and Joey and myself can build a solid squad to make it to the merge. The challenge was rough tbh, I am not great at video games, but I think I did ok... Jaiden got like 20 trillion points on a game so really I have no idea how I did. Hoping for the best!

I am losing my mind in my personal life so I am sorry that I have been mia. I appreciate the patience from the hosts and my tribe. It makes me still want to play even though I've been kinda invisible. I'm aware of that. I'll fix it. I promise. Otherwise, its been pretty good as a tribe so far. Andrew, Pat, and NIk and i are all really close from other games, so we're good and Andrew and Pat and I are together, which is just really unfair if you ask me. I can't wait to start scheming!

Uhhhhhh.................................... anyways........ yall hear somethin? Oh I hear something. It's the sound of Joey literally blowing himself up to me hardcore!!!! The narcissism and arrogance really jumped out on this one. So Joey had the idea of calling tonight to go over some stuff and honestly out of the 2 hours we spent, I think about 45-60 mins of it was rather nice and I do feel that I enjoy his presence, but omg... his desire for control is so noticeable and its kinda gross. Joey and I debriefed on what went down on Bellagio and I totally understand why there was the difference in us discussing tribe dynamics - I had to give up all my info while he kinda kept things more reserved. I want to assume this is because of the fact that I went to tribal and he hasn't until now. I won't judge him for that. However, after this he's kinda like dictating the fact that an OG Bellagio needs to go home. Ben is the easier person to throw under the bus since he didn't even bother to do the challenge/let us know what's up. Not a big fan of that, but aight. Then Joey starts suggesting we vote out Kailyn...?? Uh... not on my watch. I have to make it up to Kailyn at least a little bit so even though she's probably got a loaded gun pointed at my head rn, I want to defuse the situation rather than start throwing her out there as a potential target. Even if it isn't coming from me, I'm not here for that. The information that Joey did give up to me relates to the chips in the game. I've never paid much attention to the chips, but I guess it takes 10 to get into the vault and Joey's got between 11 and 15 (he changed his answer on the subject SEVERAL times). He says there are three idols worth 40 chips each, then a super idol worth I think 50 or 60 (can't remember). On top of that, there are nullifiers, vote advantages, and a legacy advantage, too. He seems fixated on the legacy advantage and really wants the chips to get it. Like.. ok do you but we NEED the super idol?? Does he not realize that thing has more power than anything else in the vault combined..? ANYWAYS. What really started to turn me off about Joey is that there was this sudden expectation that I'd be giving him all of my chips thus far. I don't care about them to begin with but knowing what I know now, it doesn't make sense for me to give him my stash just to fuel his hunt for... a measly legacy advantage... I put myself in a compromising position. I told him that once a host gets back to me on my exact total, I'd be willing to trade him my chips for I guess an allyship going forward. I mean that. I want to work with Joey at least through this vote, but I can't guarantee that it'll go much further than that. He is a very risky person for my game right now because if he's coming off this strong to everybody, it's only going to hurt me by association to stick with him longer than a vote or two. However, I'm going to try and divert the attention and just be like, maybe we need to use my five as a bartering piece for new allies at this point. I want to try and build meaningful partnerships right now, especially since that was the only reason I wanted to make it to the merge.. Rebuilding is crucial as well. Kailyn and possibly Nik/Rachael are not going to be fond of me once we all have "the talk" about last tribal. I put myself in an even more compromising position with them, but I'll find my way out of that mess. I think........ As far as this tribe goes, I think between Joey's WILD imagination/constant over-analyzing and the lack of direction this tribe has taken so far.. I'm doing okay. Nobody is really standing out besides Joey and I guess myself in a way, so if I keep him around it MIGHT even shrink my own target little by little - unless people find out we're together then FUK.

......five seconds later

In terms of my other relationships right now, I love John Coffey but this is old news, I've been in love with this man since like 2016 and it's fine - totally fine - just fangirling a bit rn since I get to spend more time with him!! woohoo. Xavier and Stephanie are straight up non-entities which makes me SO scared of them especially since Stephanie's won an ORG before... how can someone be so irrelevant yet still win something? Hmm... Makes me think that she's secretly a ninja, you never even see her around. Nik has grown more and more quiet as the days go along and I wonder what's goin' on with that. Maybe they've decided since Biden won the election that moving to New Zealand is a bad idea? Lmfao. I dunno. Nik stresses me the hell out because I have no idea what they're thinking at any point in time even in the off-chance that we are talking. I think I might just have a personality they don't mesh with because I noticed on call forever ago that none of my jokes were particularly landing but Nik had a lot to say and a LOT to joke about there... rip. If it's a personality conflict - go off, I guess. I'll try on a couple different hats w this person to try and see if I can get things to go better than they have been. Kailyn.. like I said before, pretty sure she's after me but I am really trying to sell it to her that I like her a lot, because I do. I literally compare her to my best friend irl because they have very similar attributes and I consider Kailyn kinda messy but fun and quirky like my BFF so I hope that Kailyn did truly appreciate me making that comparison. Ben's inability to do this challenge is going to be his undoing. I think the only acceptable move is to vote him off this time because I HAVE to prove to Kailyn that I can stay the course, and I also need to whittle down Bellagio numbers to prevent people from targeting us and having everything go to shit that way. Let Joey control this, please dear god. Don't let me get blood on my hands. Let Rachael integrate herself well on this tribe. Let someone else blow themselves up in the process. Just not me plz and thanks. There is no fear in my soul tonight. Joey might be a fucking crackhead but so am I. I'm breaking down walls that I didn't think existed but Joey basically told me tonight that he thought I was confrontational, rude, chaotic, and all these other things but was impressed at how calm, optimistic, and outgoing I was. Love to hear it. He might think he overestimated me but he was right about the initial impressions... too bad he won't be around long enough to see that side of me :~)

FIRSTLY, DeNara was robbed. Okay so I already wrote this a while ago in my host chat about how the fact jake and dan are praying for my downfall because after the swap i am the only og bellagio on a tribe with 5 palazzo and 2 luxor. so after I slowly blinked at my screen for a bit I was like okay how do we survive this if I go to tribal. Because I’m under the impression tribes are gonna stick together especially going into merge but since Luxor is already down so many members it’s kinda Bellagio Vs. Palazzo. but then I was like okay wait I’m the only member of bellagio on this tribe after coming from a tribal so I’m the only one who can say what happened and I can create what narrative I want to help me get through the next couple rounds. Because if I was like oh blah blah I was in majority im so fucked then of course they’re gonna target me to get me out. But if I play the victim card and milk the fact that I voted in the minority acting like I hate my og tribe maybe they’ll think to use me as a pawn. To take down others moving forward. Listen if I have to be labeled a goat to move forward then BAA bitch.

.....five seconds later

Things are going good, because not only am no longer in danger this round but that means Rachael is going to the enemy tribe which if she came to our tribe that might’ve disrupted the narrative I had going of me being against og bellagio. Also DeNara should still be here, don’t think I didn’t clock the fact that Ben scored a 0. I also found out from Andrew that Rachael and Ben are apart of the same Tengaged group which explains why Rachael was so set on Ben staying but like, listen, if I end up in a game with someone I’m friends with, and they’re not active and helping the tribe. Good riddance.

What the. We lost yet again. I have lost everything since the start of the game. It's crazy. There are 4 from Bellagio, 2 Palazzo and 2 Luxor. 2+2 seems like an obvious plan, but it looks like it is falling apart already (read: Joey). Sucks to be across the world, so instead of scheming, I'll be sleeping.

Forgive me father, for I have sinned. is the same as I'm sorry Daddy, I've been very naughty.

The swap did happen. Expected it. Glad we won this first challenge in this new tribe tho in worried for Stephanie and Joey

Vault Shenanigans - Holy shit I did not expect this to be as powerful as it is. I was preparing myself for some sort of payment based search system, but being able to straight up buy the items I want, but its also the same for other people. I had a misconception at how generous the wheel was so I'm probably behind some people with the amount of chips, but I could very well start scooping up some of the steal votes and just say "see ya" to the idols, although getting a super idol would be very wild, it still seems risky to hold out that long to get it, even though there's a great amount of power associated with it. The other issue with a super idol is that I think that its very likely that if I get into a position where I need to use it, that I lose a lot of respect with the jury if it does happen. The only benefit from actually having it would be that I no longer have to worry about someone else whipping it out, so it'd be less for me wanting it, but more for others not having it. As of now, I think my optimal play is to hold on to my chips until around ~40, and then buy both vote steals at once, OR go all out for the super if someone has already bought an idol by that point, because I would be operating under the assumption that the frontrunner is already out of the running. Tribe Swap Shenanigans - This is a hell of a tribe swap. 5-2-1 is always a great spot to be in, I am already good within the 5 that I have so I don't have to worry about anything there, it should be relatively smooth sailing as far as getting to the merge. Mo/Jake are alright so far, neither particularly speak too much. Kevin has not reached out at all, probably will try to talk to him tonight for general purposes, even if he seems like he'd be an easy one to get out first should we go to tribal the next time. But generally I really don't plan on losing so it's kind of a wash. I'll take the smooth sailing, easy path to merge. Premerge is never as relevant as merge is when it comes to FTC as long as you have something to show for yourself at the merge. I've got all game to make my presence known, and I plan on using the entirety of the game to do so.

I feel super anxious today because even though I had a great conversation and built a good connection to Joey, there hasn't been any talk about the vote quite yet. I mean obviously names have rolled out but nothing solid is out there still, I think I just need to let go of the urgency for a name to start being spread early on and just let things be. Stephanie and I have been chatting a bit here and there today so I feel more comfortable with her and hopefully she sees things from a similar perspective as everyone else - the Bellagio foursome needs to get broken up right now. As long as it's not my name of course!!!!! Plz vote Ben @everyone. Or Kailyn tbh save me a little bit of trouble now. Talking to Xavier is SO HARD LMAO. He doesn't immediately contribute information into a conversation and as bad as I wanna get rid of Ben, I almost..almost think going for Xavier is the smarter move, since Xavier doesn't seem too motivated to actually get to know ME and work with me. I'm selfish that way. Kailyn doesn't seem like she wants to do Ben which is a little frustrating but I totally get it, if Ben stays he's going to go after her hardcore but like she needs to actually pitch me an alternative lmfao. I don't wanna go bending over backwards just to appease her right now so if she doesn't gimme a name.. sorry sis but then I think it's gonna be Joey's call on this one :/

I am being very cautious now. The 4 of us (me, John, Joey and Steph) are going to vote together. Now Jaiden wants to vote Nik. And Kailyn wants to vote Ben. Why can't we just agree on one?! And it always has to go down to the wire. Stick together, people!

I think I am possibly leading the charge against Nik rn?? Joey told me he wanted Ben and then I told him I wanted Nik and now he wants Nik LOL take that Stephen

Okay well I have no idea what's going to happen tonight, but I'm going into tribal not afraid of the vote I am probably going to have to make ... I think the best move is to just vote for Nik and be done with it, but it's going to cause a serious rift in a lot of my relationships if I do so. I've been super wishy-washy to a lot of people I think and right now it doesn't make sense to continuously do one thing when I mean another.. especially since there seems to be zero ground to move upon when it comes to getting the vote to turn from Nik to Ben. Nik doesn't even SEEM ACTIVE?? Why are we making this a bigger deal than it needs to be. Ben can't just walk around deciding what's going on and I think Kailyn would prefer to keep Nik around rather than Ben but it's like... so push for Ben to be the target hun! She's feeding into someone else's move no matter what she does, it's either Ben's agenda or John's agenda. Pick a side, but pick the side I'm on, too. Why don't we just vote for Kailyn tbh. lmao

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staycatcher · 5 years

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Hi!!! You're absolutely right about day6 and fall. Idk what it is but they're perfect for fall walks and bike rides. Colors is like ten times better when I'm standing in the crisp air surrounded by fallen leaves. You just reminded me that I should start going on bike rides again. I had a (more than) slight incident in spring so my parents made me stop "what if you DIED?!" :( Have you ever done anything that kind of stupid before? 1/2

Oh my god!! And colors is so applicable since it’s fall and all the pretty colors you get to see :D🥰 when I was in the car the one that stood out the most was letting go~~ idk just the chill mood~~ and I usually need to hear that kind of message anyways but hearing it that time was really good and healing for me😌🍂🍁✨

Oh no what happened?!?! Are you alright?!! :O I hope so that sounds really scary!!

Oh and definitely!! Too many to count lmao I’m very clumsy and prone to accidents but somehow I’ve never broken a bone but last September (2018) I did something super stupid!! It’ll make you feel better lmao so I’ll tell it

STORYTIME!! Blood warning!! (I have hEmophobia so shout to all my fellow hEmophobes out there I get you I hate it so this story was even worse for me) Waste of time to read warning!!😂😂

So basically!! Last September I was just WALKING home okay. Nothing crazy at all, just walking on the sidewalk in between this car dealership parking lot behind my school and this place where you turn in to get to the Walgreens and other shit, with my best friend from school to home (that was the plan at least)

But!! I fucking tripped OVER MY OWN TWO FEET. Though the sidewalk did actually have cracks or unevenness or something could be the fault. But no. I was the one at fault.

My ankle just decided to idek what but I tripped over my own two left feet and immediately!! BAMMM!!! My face onto the concrete. I bit my lip when I was trying to regain balance, thus when my face hit the ground I bIT MY LIP !!OPEN!! Blood!! Pain!! Embarrassment!! bc this is just ~right~ by the school okay like half a block so all the kids in their cars saw, the people walking far from us saw, hell maybe even god saw too if Woojin wasn’t too busy.

Anyways!! I get up immediately!! I’m like fuck, no one can see me fucking do that!! I get up fast as I could!! My bestie helps me is like “omf are yoU OKAY BREWGIE (but she said my irl name ofc) WHAT WAS THAT!???!” Bc she fuckin knows me very very well. She’s seen me fall before and vice versa too but it’s never been like this and I’m just !!!!!!!!

I’m just like ‘it’s fine, it’s fine, this is okay, this is fine. I’m not gonna think about it let’s just carry on it’s not a big deal, it’s not a big deal at all’. BUT CLEARLY, IT IS A BIG DEAL!! I MEAN I BIT MY LIP OPEN!! But I just told her it’s okay let’s not call my parents or yours let’s just walk this off and I’ll stop by my mom’s salon that’s on another block!! BUT!! I’m hypoglycemic and ate a very small lunch and nothing since then which was hours ago so like I’m already in a bad place and then I just threw on an injury on top of that and said ‘it’s fine, let’s go.’

So the entire way there I’m a fuckin soldier okay. I skinned my knees also but who cares I’m limping myself with my comforting best friend that I barely pay attention to bc I’m just! Goin’! Can’t stop! Limping our way to the Walgreens and making jokes the whole way there bc that’s how I cope with things. Then we make it to the intersection at where the Walgreens ends then we wait for the light for us to cross. And it was so humiliating walking past 5 lanes of traffic that I just know is full of people I go to school with and are probably underclassmen who have a car and I don’t. So I don’t even look at them!! Eyes on the prize, cracking jokes trying to get me and my friend to laugh everything away.

So it felt like it took four years to cross those lanes of traffic and now we’re on the other side where this gas station is, then a fast food place then after that is the building of my mom’s hair salon but on the other side is where our neighborhoods are.

On this day, I usually would go with her cuz I didn’t work for my mom that day but. There’s no way in hell I’m gonna walk up to the apartment where my friend lives and have to nurse me back to health or some shit and then raid her food when she barely has any food for herself so no!! And I can’t walk four times that to my house so the only option is the salon.

I said, “I’ll wait for your light then I’ll go to the salon!!” And she argued with me but I’m a stubborn Taurus so I won and she went but she wasn’t happy about it then I limped all the wayyyy to the salon; which is like a long way for an injured hypoglycemic gal such as myself at the time but I did it like a champion and went on in!! And played it cool~~~

I see my mom is in the middle of dying someone’s hair so I just say hi and brush past her and luckily I was fast or something cuz she didn’t see me and I waited for an. Entire. Half an hour. At the reception desk and each second my body is like ‘!!! HELLO !! YOU NEED HELP RIGHT NOW!!’ But I’m like nope, nope I will wait this out when i can be helped bc I’m too embarrassed and ashamed and hangry and in pain and grumpy to do anything else.

So once the half an hour or more waiting ends, somehow I’m in the aesthetician’s room who’s not there that day and I finally!! Breathe!! Let it out!! And tell my mom!! And she flips and gets her friend to check out my lip and she’s like ‘ohhh man!! its super deep but not deep enough to get stitches’ and i was like hallelujah!! I could not deal with that whole ordeal.

The ending is basically me canceling on my dad’s dinner with them all making fun of me and I got really pissed at them and then for like two weeks coming to school with an ice pack to my face and joking around with my friends which led to me making one of my graphics design projects about my big swollen lip.

The end!! 😂😂😂 dont feel bad for me at all I find it hilarious and ridiculous now so don’t like feel bad for me or anything, laugh with me!!

#i hope you enjoyed my dumb story about how i botched my lip naturally by tripping over my own feet #and if not im sorry i wasted your time lmao #aahhahajhahhaahflsa #brewgie answers #baby mutuals👼💞#🌵 anon #day6 anon event #anon #storytime with brewgie ig

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morticianikolaevna · 5 years

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Did I say that?

Ty Dellamonica x reader!!! Changing things up a little for Undrafted. I have a lovely friend who has the hots for Ty Dellamonica. So I'm going to fufill some fantasies. Friends to lovers!

After the fight, you sat with Ty and made sure he was okay. People took care of Garvey and all was well, until the cops showed up. "Ty, are you hurting any?" You asked sweetly and he smiled up at you through his pretty dark eyelashes. "No darlin', I'm just fine. Are YOU hurt though?" He asked grabbing your arms. A shout was heard from one of the policeman, and that's when everyone got shakey, and thats when you clamped down onto Ty. He simply looked at you at this point, his pretty skin dirty with dirt and blood. The police officer asked for Vin and Ty and they stood up walking towards like they were asked.

You simply stood back sobbed when they placed Ty in handcuffs and took him away. He didn't notice it yet. "Finish the game, FINISH THE GAME!" He shouted and looked back at you. His whole face softened when he saw you shake from sobs and his heart exploded. When they were put into the car, Vin looked at him.

"Y/N looked really upset. I hope she's okay." Ty's heart was hurting so bad right now over the thought of not being able to hug you. He really wished you'd like him back though.

You and Ty became friends in middle school and never looked back. You fell for him, and over the years he brought home a girl who only used him. They broke it off and he came back to you thank god. As you returned to the benches you hoped he'd like you back though.......Barone gave you a look. "Your boyfriend is goin to fuckin jail, little lady. Must suck!" He laughed loudly.

Palacco slapped Barone and for once, didn't have anything to say. "Can you just leave her alone? Can't you see she is in distress you stupid prick?" John spat at him. You simply just shrunk down hoping to be hidden but it wasn't that easy. Fotch tried to comfort you but it didn't work. He was really hurt too and the game is really intense now.

John cracked the ball out of the park. It launched straight over the fence and you all screamed. He won the fucking game! You all stormed the field and began to celebrate. Ty and Vin thanked the cop as he let them go and they ran towards the celebration pile. "WHAT?? ARE YOU KIDDING ME??" Vinnie yelled as he ran, Ty not far behind. You stood in the open and made eye contact with him, running towards him. You tackled Ty into a hug and held him close, him doing the same with his tall body. It felt as time stood still and you heard words you thought'd you never hear.

"I love you Y/N, so much." Ty was whispering as he stroked your hair and you pulled back from him. He looked hurt over it, but you wrapped your arms around his neck. "I love you more, Ty. I bet my life on that one." He pulled you in for a kiss you'd been waiting on since that one game of seven minutes in heaven from 7th grade. You two pulled back and all the boys were screaming over the fact you two finally got together after years. "ITS ABOUT FUCKING TIME BRO, YOU GET IT!" Dells screamed and smiled, Palacco making some sexual gestures with his hands. All was good and you curled into his chest.

And that was one for Ty! I like writing for the Undrafted boys, it makes my heart swell. Please send more!!! Love you all!

@queen-irl-af @plethora-of-things @tardisgrump @borhapqueen92 @punkgeekchic @extremelypansexual @scarecrowmax

#undrafted #joe mazzello

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dragon5kulls-blog · 5 years

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Losing Her

Losing the one person I've ever told "I love you"....her. (lets call her Guava, cause that was a nickname given to her cause she likes guava juice/soda) I've always been very closed, reserved, and if you would know me IRL, you would of never noticed me sad, depressed. You would just seen me as somewhere in between quiet and calm, but that is because I have always been great at hiding emotions. We broke up about 12 hours ago. She was my first. 16 years single until about a month ago for the very reason that I knew that I would get so attached and it would hurt the day they left. Scared of losing someone I love. It was an LDR which most people say really ever works out, and even knowing this, I still gave her a chance. We first met on discord, march/29/2019 a friday, and I would normally just pop in different channels and my typical lines were "oh yeah yeah" "oh no no" and "oh boi". She told me that she was in one of the channels were I joined and she repeated back what i was saying, and it went for a bit, until i went to another channel. Now its march 30, and I went around playing piano to others. There was this one guy who could sing and I started to voice record, me playing bich lasagna and him singing it. Then I went to another channel, were there she was again. It was a channel with 4 other people in it. I joined into her telling a FanFic about...Hitler and Jesus . Yep... and i'm not religious myself but I was (still am for about 2 more weeks) in a catholic class on Sundays, so yeah....oh boi. It was weird, but I was bored, so I stayed in the voice channel. We decided to just make a group chat just for us 5 people so she could finish the FanFic. She read it, we had our reactions and we just kept talking on that call. After some time, one by one they left the call until it was just me and her, we talked for a couple of min until I said that i'm just going to head back to the there server because it was a bit awkward now since I never had female friends, except for one who i met online( lets call her Mia), and neither have I been interested in being in a relationship so it just felt a bit weird. When I told her i was just about just head out and go back to the server, she told something along the lines of "oh, you just gona leave the call, i see how it is" and that very day, I had the choice to stay or to go. As I said, I would of always just left and not think about it, but I something something different this time. I chose to stay. We talked about my Dog named Max, cutest dog ever, yeah he isn't really well with other dogs, but he was my little max. At some point in life I did feel suicidal for other reasons that involved my parents, me, and my brothers. But thanks to max, whenever I used to start thinking about just ending the pain that went on for months, I would always look at max and start cuddling with him. Thanks to him and Mia, a friend that i trusted enough to talk about the situation i was in at the moment, i would always stop myself and feel a bit better. We talked about a few other things too, by this time its been around an hour or so that we have been talking and i receive a dm from one of the people that was in that group (lets call her Caitlin). Caitlin saw that we were still in the call and just typed "i ship it" and i was like uh, oh no no. and she told me, why not. I said that i wasn't here for that, and she told me, there is no harm in sliding in Guava dm's and getting to know her. So Caitlin now joins the call as well and asked her how old Guava was, and she said 16, she asked me and i said 16, then Caitlin sent me a dm saying to go for it, i just kinda ignored it. So I talked for a few more min to both of them, until i told them I was goin to the store real quick, so I just muted and left. When i came back I un-muted and said my usual phrase "oh yeah yeah, im back boi" and they was like oh, hi again. The three of us were talking about music and a few other things. Because this Sunday church class was close to where my mom and brothers lived, every Saturday my dad would drive me to my moms house in the afternoon and pick me up the next day. So I told them that I had to go, said bye and just left the call. About 3 min later as i'm getting my stuff ready to go, I receive a dm this time from Guava saying "where did you go ?:(" and i told her that my brothers came over and that i had to go to their place. Then she told me if i will send pictures of max, i told her, if I remember then yeah. Then her next text was " he’s sO cute(like me), you better remember" so I kinda avoided responding to her dm by talking about something else, a few the rest of the text were from her saying " it’s like almost 3pm over there right?" I said "Yep" then she said "it’s so sad, well can you do me a favor before you go >:0" i asked "Wut" she said "call real quick and say oh yea yea :’o" So obviously i already can tell she kinda into me. So I finish packing up my stuff and go back to my laptop to shut it down, but as im closing apps, i see that I left the voice recorder on, and im sitting there like, oops. and so I was hearing the audio so i can know when to edit out the rest that wasn't the guy that singed bich lasagna. I got a bit curious and remembered that they were talking when I left to the store earlier, and so I skipped to that part where I muted my self and left. Caitlin asked her what were we talking about and she said about max and a few other things and that I seemed cute. Caitlin told her to slide in my dm''s then, and Guava sounded unsure, so Caitlin told her that she should just said "fuk it" "just go for it". At this point I was surprised, I ended up saving that part of the recording but had to go now cause my dad was waiting for me in the car. So i'm at my mom's house and its around like 6pm for me, and she is in a different time zone, 6 hours ahead. So i decided to call her, forgetting that its 12pm for her, but she picked up. I showed her max for a while and then went back to just voice chat. We talked for a bit more and then they left the call again. i talked to guava for while again until like a half an hour later when I realized that she has fallen asleep on the call. so i'm like, 0of, her phones battery is gona be dead when she wake up. So I ended up get a call from the group chat shortly after. The rest of the group chat we talking and I told Caitlin that Guava fell asleep on the call, Caitlin just said, cute, I responded with "oh no no". So we stayed on the group call for about 2 more hours, Once in a while I checked on Guava to check if she still had the call open, and she did, I joined once in a while and said "Oh yeah yeah" I even texted her that im tying to wake her up cause her phone was gona die. At around 9, I started watching youtube and getting ready to sleep at around 11. Its Sunday morning and I wake up to a text from her saying " i-, my phone is always on battery save, so it can literally survive on 1% for an hour, I woke up alone still in the call at 8am with 3%, thanks tho, for trynna wake me up" I told her that I joined once in a while and said Oh yeah yeah, she said that was cute and she wish she would of woken up, but the way I say Oh yeah yeah is soothing, so of course she wouldn't wake up, I and so I say, wut... that's a first. To switch up the convo, I told her that Max has just woken up and she wanted to see him. The room was dark and i didn't want to turn on the light cause I didn't want to wake u my brother, so instead I sent her pictures of Max, and then we sent each other a bit of memes. That was that for the day, Monday comes, and i remember that she is 6 hours ahead, so at 12:42pm my time I sent her a text saying to wake up cause its time for school, and she said she still had time for a few more min of sleep and then asked me if I shouldn't be asleep. I told her thats its 12:42pm and she told me to not stay up to late. I told her why not, she stays up late too, and then she asked me if she can send the pic of me to Caitlin. Yesterday she asked for a pic of me, and was saying nah, im good. She kinda ended up pressuring me to send it, so I was like fine. I sent her a pic that I took about 3 months ago of me and max laying down. So she's asking if she could send it to Caitlin cause she wanted to know how I looked like too. It was time for her to go school by now so she just tells me goodnight. I went to sleep and then I left to school. Came back and then we were just texting for a while, then we just called for a while till she left to eat. About and hour and a half passed by now and decided to give her a call, she didn't pick up so I just went back to the other Server and talked to other random people. She texts me back like 30 min later saying sorry that she was busy playing minecraft, and so i tell her, nice, me and another friend from school were planning to play minecraft, but he never picked up. Then I tell her to go to sleep cause for her it was 2am, she just replied with "no u". We texted for a few more min, and then I remember that the day before, she wanted me to learn a song on the piano, so I told her before she goes to sleep, if I can call real quick if she wants to hear the bit that I learned, she said yeah. I called her and showed her the bit that I was practicing and then we just talked for a few more min. Then again, she fell asleep on the call, and of course I stayed on the call this time and said oh yeah yeah once in a while. After a few hours she just left the call with out saying anything, so im like...ok. Discord bot kicked me from the call after 5 min. I stay up till like 2am again and she text me saying, damn, that she didn't know she fell asleep on the call again. I told her that I did the same thing, saying oh yeah yeah once in a while. I went to sleep, and woke up to her text that said she felt tired cause she stays up late too, and I tell her "oh boi". I had to go to school but I wanted to keep talking to her, so I skipped my first period class and kept texting her. She told me she doesn't want to go to work, and she told the time she has work and then we were talking about other stuff too. I went to school late, we made cookies in class that day, and so when I came back, I told her what we did and so on. She ended up reading stories she found online and then would you rather. We ended up talking about, lets just say, "stuff" as well, and then I decided to show her the voice recording, and we talked. I told her that I have never been in a relationship and idk. After that, everyday we talked every time we could, and on April 3rd, I showed her the screenshots of Caitlin that she was telling me to go for it and stuff, she also showed me screenshots that Caitlin told her too. We talked every single day playing minecraft, watching movies by screen sharing my screen, anything that just had us on a call. On April 14 we even stayed on the call for 14 hours, and we had an idea, to see if we could even do a 24 hour call. This was also the day in which i opened up to her about the stuff I've been through in the past, which was hard, but I trusted her. She is a big fan of Marvel, mainly Spider-man, in particular Tom Holland. and we planned to see Endgame the same day it came out. Whenever we couldn't get on a call for reasons, I would still text her, and she told me, "why is time going so slow when I’m not talking with you" and I would say the same, but at the same time it when ever we were on a call, it also felt like forever, but it a good way, in which I enjoyed every single second of it. One of the other things we did was having my webcam facing the table and we both just draw. Fast forward to 26 of April, Another thing we did was that during her lunch periods at school, she would always call me, so we are talking, and then she says she has to go they got an announcement that told everyone to meet up. She texts me a bit later and tells me that there was something that happened at her school, they were all crying cause they had a teacher that just passed away in the building. This was also the same day we both we gona see Endgame. We keep talking like normal again. On the 28 of April is when I finally said yes to her. I started to get to school late and leave early often because I wanted to talk to her. I always use to soft talk her to sleep to now, it was our thing where we just keep the call on while we sleep too. A few of the times where she was sleeping, she mumbled "I love you". This was one of the many things I found adorable about her, like the way she giggled when I used to make her laugh, when on Saturdays it was me who woke up to her voice on the call, whenever I was feeling sick she used to just say in a soft voice "don't worry about it", we used to tell each other to imagine what a warm hug from us would feel, and we had our little nicknames for each other too, and another thing that we used to said was "I love you 3000". So now its May 5, and this day we were sent to a catholic retreat that was required to pass this church class. Like a week before this day, my mom called to let me know I had to go there, the first thing I did was that I told her that I had to go to this place for 3 days, cause that is what I was told. I told her that If I wasn't able to call, ill at least text her whenever I can. So the day comes and i'm letting her know that i'm in the car with the teacher and the other 2 people that was going too. So I made sure to let her know when I get on the car, and when we got there. So we get of the car and I have my backpack with cloths and stuff, thinking that we just gona walk in and see what this is all about, but before we left the car, the teacher told us that we had to leave our phones in the car for now. So i'm like, ok, maybe they just want to make sure we pay attention to where we were, what we gona do, ect. So before I left my phone, I texted her that our teacher told us to leave the phones in the car. We left them and went in. We went to a place that was like a hotel, they had our names already, took our bags, and told us to go to a bigger room. Here is where there was like 50 other people too. So i'm like wow. We just standing there wondering what is we going to do now. They explain the schedule and said we were goin to have a room with a roomate, so im like, dope. So after like an hour of talking and getting to know one another a bit, they tell us we can now go to our rooms and rest. So im like, yess, im feeling tired and I already miss my baby nugget, that was one of our little nicknames. So as people were heading to their rooms, I start to look for our teacher to ask him for my phone now, he ends up saying that we aren't getting them back till this is over, because he wants us to fully live this experience we were going to get. So at this point, in the inside I start to feel sad and mad because I promised Guava that I would have communication with her. I felt like I was going to let her down. I head to my room and see my roomate, I say whats up to him and then we just start to talk for a bit, he 19 and was very chill and nice to talk too. By this time its late and I was bored, and then I remembered that I had a notebook in my bag, so I take that out and a pencil, then I start writing exactly the way I would text her, It started with like 2 sentences and I thought by the time we leave this place, I would have like possibly 2 whole pages written down, but nope, I ended up writing 15 pages, top to bottom, and I even drew a rose for her one of those days. They had the windows covered with stuff and there wasn't any clocks, so we didn't really have a concept of time, those 3-4 days actually felt like 1-2 weeks, but I kept writing about what we did, the people I met, the food, but mainly how much I missed her. As I said before, i'm not religious my self but the stuff that was said there, really did make us change the way we saw stuff. We promised to not say what was spoken over there, cause what was said there, stays there. But Ill briefly talk about what changed with me. Growing up I never treated my brother, like an actual brother, and thinking back at it, he has always been there for me, but I can't say the same for him. There was times where he has taken the blame and punishments that I was responsible for, treated him a bit like shit, always distanced my self from my family members, I never gave him that trust with him. He is about a year and a half younger than me, and I regretted so much how I never acted like his older brother, someone he can can talk to if stuff was bothering him, someone he could trust. So what I ended up picking up there myself was to be grateful for having him there for me, even though I haven't before to him. I ended up promising to myself that I would trust him and I want to be there for him as well. Since I always been reserved, nobody in my family knew I was dating Guava. So I promised myself that once I go back, I will tell my brother everything, how the situation with our parent affected me, how I knew that he used go to sleep crying cause he hated seeing my parents like that and I never said or did anything. I also wanted to tell him about me and Guava. So the day finally comes, May 5th, the day we get to go back, when I saw the teacher I rushed to him as he was getting out his car and I didn't say hi or anything, I wanted my phone so badly so I can text to my baby nugget, cause it felt like almost 2 weeks with out her. So i'm turning on my phone expecting texts from her saying she missed me too. I open discord and I see " i already miss your voice in the morning", "i missed your voice at work", "and rn laying in my bed", " i cant sleep:( ", " i miss my baby nugget", " i need your voice to help me sleep" on May 3rd. Then on May 4th "weekend..", "and again, I miss you", " this is weird", "I really miss you and it hurts", "it randomly just happens and I go “aw I miss my baby nugget” and almost cry ". And this is when it really hurt, in the afternoon that day, she started saying " honestly fuk you for making me fall for you ", " I bet you haven’t even thought about me these 2-3 days ", " and im over here missing you like crazy ", " its stupid ", " i guess you’re gonna be back tomorrow right? ", " I told you it was probably gonna end it:( ", " ew I just realised I’ve been spamming you with “updates” ", " goodbye baby nugget ", " i mean eduardo " (thats my real name btw), " welp i can’t sleep ", " i mean you said 3 days, today is basically the 3rd, i guess you’ll be home tomorrow then ", " i wonder if something happened ", " i hope you’re having fun ". May 5th, earlier in the day when I still didn't have my phone, " i have 4 theories ", " 1. you aren’t back yet, so you’re still at the camp ", " 2. I was right and it ends here ", " 3. you lost your phone and your dad didn’t give your laptop back ", " 4. something (bad) happened to you ", " number 4 is bad and im hoping that’s not it, please rather number 2 than 4 ", " i have my first exam tomorrow, I’d hoped you’d be back in time to wish me good luck ". I got my phone back later in the day and responded with "I LOVE YOU" and then told her that they took my phone for those days, and that of course I was thinking of her all the time. I told her that I missed her so much and also wished her luck on her test. My battery was at 2% by this time since its just been in a car or wherever he kept them for those days. She ends up responding with " fuck you " and I responded with " No, baby why ??? 1% btw ", " I LOVE YOU ". She texted back " I hate you ". Since I've never been in a relationship before or been close to anyone like that, I haven't ever felt this kind of pain before. But I was in a larger van with more people heading back home, all I wanted was to cry and hug her as I tell her that i'm sorry for not being able to to talk to her those days, it felt like I loss her. I wanted to cry so badly but there was others around so I held it in, and for those who hold in pain like that, you know how that tight feeling around your throat and that intense pressure around your head. I tried to go to sleep until we got back home, but I couldn't when we finally got back to our church, we went to the basement and there was most of our family members waiting for us. We sat at some tables in the front while they were were all in chairs facing us. Our Aux's (that is what the people that took us through everything, like teachers, but they also went through stuff like we did) they were standing on the side giving mini speeches on how going over there helped us each with different things. We also talked about how our experience was and the new friends that we got close to. But I was kinda shaking while I was talking, not because I was nervous, but because I remembered what Guava told me. Its now like 9pm and I charged my phone while I took a shower. I went back to my phone and texted her again that I love her and that i'm sorry for not having my phone those days. I went to the kitchen and started to take pictures of each page of that notebook and sent them to her. I told her that it wasn't even my fault that they took our phones and how I was feeling when I saw those texts. Next morning, May 6 Monday, she responds saying that she didn't mean it, and she read most of the pages, and she had to go take the exam. She also has religious parents and in their religion, she was starting Fasting that day too, which she told me that they were going to eat at 9:30pm and 3:15am their time. She also says " we need to talk.. ", " I thought a lot while you were away ". I come back from school and text her that i'm home, she doesn't respond, a couple min later I decide to call her, she doesn't pick up. I text her that ill be watching youtube till she calls back. Around an hour goes by and I decide to call again, no answer. Like 5 min later I text her by her real name, and then she responds with "what". Instantly I knew what was going on, but I acted like I didn't know, so I just told her that ill be on my laptop in a bit. She tells me again that she still wants to talk about something, I called her and she picked up this time. She ended up telling me that those days gave her time to think, and she said we were moving to fast, and she wanted to take it slow and take it back to before we were a thing. I didn't know what to say. I try to not sound upset, I just said, it was her decision if if she wanted to take things to before we were a thing, then fine. I left the call and went to take a shower. She texted me again at around 1am the next day telling me that she has her math exam and she is stressed. I tell her good luck on her test, and she replies with " thanks baby nugget " and then tells me to go to sleep. At this point i'm confused now, cause she made me feel "that way" the day before, saying she wanted to take it back before we were a thing. After she told me to go to sleep, I just say, Fine. About 10 min pass and she texts me back saying she forgot something at home, and I just say Oof. She says its a good thing that she lives 5 min away from her school, and I just start answering the same way I would text other "friends". She tells me that she ran and got it, I just say, great. Now she starts to ask "baby nugget, are you okay?" And i'm just so confused/stressed, but I tell her yeah, i'm good. Later on in the day, she asks me if I want to call. I was about to say no, but I ended up saying yeah. We talked again for a few hours and ended up agreeing on taking it slow, so I went back to being more reserved from her, act like there wasn't anything but an online friendship. Wednesday May 8th, instead of texting her, I decide to go to the server and talk to some random people again. Half an hour later I see that she is also joining channels, so I try to avoid her so its not awkward. Sometime later, she texted me that she sees me going around the server and that I haven't text her. I just tell her that someone was playing guitar and I was bored. We text just a little bit, and she ends up saying " we barely talk, it’s sad ", so i'm still confused and simply just asked her if she wants to call or not, she says maybe, so I say " im not gona rush anything u dont want, i talked to someone for help, and they told me to not rush u, but just wait". The person that I asked for help was that online friend named Mia. Guava ends up saying " just call me already " and so I did. She told me that even though she wants to take it slow, she doesn't want me going back to being reserved. We talked for a while until she fell asleep again. She woke up a few hours later, as I was about to go to sleep. I asked her if she knew that the new season for Lucifer finally came out, she said yeah, she knows, we both like watching that show. After like 10 min of talking, I told her that she should just go back to sleep because its 3am for her and she tells me, " baby nugget nO ". To be honest, at this point I kinda started to just feel frustrated because I felt like she was just playing around, saying she wants to take it slow, but then calling me, baby nugget constantly. After she told be that in a hour it will be 4am for her, and if she stays up for an hour, she would of still gotten enough sleep, again, I told her to just go back to sleep, and she says " can’t I just stay up and talk with you:(". I was like, I don't even know, does she want to get back or not. We talked for like 20 min, then I told her I was getting sleepy, so I was gona go sleep now. Next day, May 9, its a thursday, she texts me like at her time 7am to wake up, but im still sleeping so she just says " goodnight/good morning ", " bby nugget", " ttyl". We talked a bit more again when she came back from school, she told me that fuck taking it slow, that she loves me and was just sad that she felt that I left her for those days. And after some talking , I told her that I love her too, I made made myself distant because I wanted to respect her decision and if she wanted to leave, it wouldn't hurt as much because I would of already accepted the fact that we are no longer together. We watched Lucifer for a while, and then I had to go to a parent teacher conference with my dad. I left the call on my phone, I was happier, because we were together again, after I came back, I heard that she was sleeping, so I just texted her, good morning to whenever she sees this text. She woke up like half an hour later saying she fell asleep, I told yeah, "i know, keep sleeping bby nugget" and she said, " im tired, but I want you ". So we started to talking again just like before. Every time we called, if I felt sick or something, just hearing her voice made my day. May 11, she ended up confessing why she got distant the days after I came back, it was because she was mad at herself because of something she did while i was gone, she started to take to other people and one of those people she talked to, she got a bit close too. I told her that i'm not even mad, disappointed....a bit, but I was glad that she told me the truth, I wanted her to be honest with me. She started to cry a bit on the call, but I told her that I understand why she would of felt like that when I left her for those days cause I didn't have my phone. Like I said, when she stopped replying to my texts, I felt like I loss her too and it was only like 2 days that she wasn't responding like she used to, and for her, I left for 4 days with no texts at all during those days. While she was crying, she asked me why was I being so understanding, I said...Cause I love you 3000. I ended up telling up telling Guava who was the one helping me to try and get guava back when she was being distant. I didn't want to tell her earlier because she felt a bit jealous, but I made it clear to her that she is only a friend that helped me when I was younger. We promised to not keep secrets from one another, and at that point I think I felt the closest to her. On May 12, that is when we completed the 24 hour call we said we were gona do. These days she wasn't feeling well because of the fasting thing that she is doing, so going so long without eating made her feel sick. I kept telling to eat something because I didn't like when she felt sick, but she said she can't cause of fasting. I tried to make her feel better by telling her " I'm so lucky because... I have you, someone who acually cares about me and makes me happy. I'm smiling while I'm typing this. Even if it's only been about 2 months, Thank You for being there for me". I waited for her to wake up the next day and talk, she taught me how to say, "I love you" in danish, " jeg elsker dig". Meeting her made me feel the happiest I ever been in years. Whenever she woke up at 3:15am her time to eat, I used to help her wake up by quietly saying her name or just talking about the way she always made me feel, after she ate and came back, I always asked her what is it that she had to eat and then soft talk her to sleep again. I used to love it whenever she used to sometimes soft talk me to sleep, the ways she used to tell she wanted to cuddle with me and max. The type of food she wanted to teach me how to cook. On Wednesday 15, when we were on a call during her lunch period, she told me that they got a printer in their class now, so I gave her the idea that she should print out memes, and put them around the classroom, and she did, it was a spider-man meme, she ended up printing 5 of these and started to putt them up around her class. One of the things that she helped me with a bit was in school, cause I started to do some work while I was on a call with her in the mornings. She gave me a reason to wake up early everyday and since I was always in a good mood while being on a call with her, I decided to multi task a bit. So I thanked for that. Thursday comes and I just picked up some bluetooth earbuds that I ordered mainly because of I wanted to to talk to her when I wasn't at home with a good mic, my phone's aux input is a bit messed up and makes a static noise whenever wired earbuds moved, so I bought those bluetooth ones. That day I called her twice and she didn't pick up, but she was on the server talking to others so was like fine, she talking to some friends or something. She ended up calling me at 3am her time, so I asked her what happened because she didn't call or barley texted me that day. She said that she just didn't feel like it. I felt a bit sad but told my self, its fine, she was just busy and forgot. The next day we got on a call again, she didn't have school this friday, so we stayed on the call till I went to school, but she mainly just watched youtube instead of talking. I went to school and when I came back at 12am, told her I was back, gave her a little text once in a while cause she didn't respond till about 2 hours later, saying she was busy. Again...kinda felt sad cause I started to feel her being distant again, and I really didn't want to lose her. I started to feel sick, like really light headed and stomach ache, I told her how I felt sick, she asked if I was okay, I said not really. She called me for like 2 min and told me to drink some water, and call my dad if I kept feeling sick. Then she left the call again. She called back at around 5pm my time. Again i'm feeling her being distant because her time it was already 11pm, and we really didn't talk that day, just enough for her to tell me to soft talk her to sleep. I did soft talk her to sleep, but when I knew she was asleep for sure, I talked about how I was really feeling, that I was scared of losing her, the one person I have ever told them "I Love You. I texted her at my time She wakes up at like 8:20pm my time, she talks for a few min until she goes eat. She didn't call back or even let me know what she ate, like we always used too. So at like 3:40am my time, I sent her a text. She calls me back at around 4am my time, and says she had to go like around 6am my time, and again all she really just do was just watch youtube. Now im really worried if I did something that she doesn't want to text or talk to me for these last few days. She ends up coming back and we get on a call at 11am my time. Again she didn't want to watch Lucifer or talk like before, she just used to watch youtube videos and tell me to mute my self once in a while, cause she wanted to watch her ASMR videos. At around 2pm, I decided to take a nap because I didn't feel well again. She didn't even want to soft talk me to sleep. So I just slept. Woke up an hour later and my dad was going to take me to the clinic because I wasn't feeling well. I told her before that we were going to travel to mexico to see family members in particular my grandpa, since he may not be around next year due to age. So at 5pm, I let her know as soon I knew, the dates we were going to travel, but this time I was going to have my phone for sure. She said ok, and then went to sleep at like at 5:30pm my time. Since it was a Saturday, we were heading to my moms place. Later that day we talked again like around 7pm for a while, since max and my little cousin we playing together I had the camera on. This is when she actually talked to me in a while, instead of just watching youtube. She ended up sleeping on the call and woke up at 10:30pm, she fell asleep again and she woke up at 2am my time, over there it was already 8am. This time I fell asleep to her voice, I wake up at 6am and see her text that says " my baby it’s so cute I can hear you breathing in your sleep ", " I just wanna hug you and cuddle you " I replied with "Aw", " I love you 3000", " That wut u said earlier was so adorable, I was awake when u was laughing, and was smiling. You just warm me up with the smallest things you do, I love you 3000!" by text cause my mom was sleeping still. It kinda made me forget how she was being distant that last few days. We texted for a bit when I got out of church class at 1:30pm . I called her when it was like 3pm, I saw that she was talking to others again, so I just let her know that i'm with Max. She responded at 3:50pm saying she had dessert, I asked if she wanted to call, she said in a bit, she didn't call, she responded with a text at 8:30pm. Again i'm noticing that she just doesn't want to talk, and I guess I already knew that she has/is losing interest. At 9pm my time she tells me if I wana call? And I already had a feeling that I knew it was time she was going to say what I've feared from the start. For the past week that I felt her changing, I always asked her, what wrong? Did I do something? If there is something she wanted to talk about, just say it, she would just keep saying that nothing is wrong, and I alked her, why is she talking to me less, she said, its normal don't worry about it. By this time, for the past two days, I asked for help about this to 3 other people, one of them was Mia. She told me that obviously it was't normal, maybe she was having other issues which she couldn't rely on my help for, she told me to just give her some time. Guava kept saying nothing is wrong, but before she went to sleep, one of the last things she said was, there is something she wants to talk about. I knew it was time...but she said that she was going to tell me the next day instead. I woke up at 12 like usual to tell her good morning, instead of her texting at least for a bit, she just said go back to sleep. At this point i'm just sad because I know there a 90% I already loss her. But still had that little bit of hope that it wasn't what I was thinking. Hoping it was something else...I could even sleep that day and stayed up waiting till 5am, for our usual call during her lunch break...she didn't text or call at all. There was no text no nothing till when she called me at 4:28pm. She told me exactly what I was scared of, she said that she wanted someone who she can actually cuddle with rn, someone who wasn't in a different time zone, someone who isn't on the other side of the earth. All this time that we have been talking and said that distance/time zones matters close to nothing when that someone means everything. I just had one question, "Did you ever mean it when you said "I love you"....She said "probably" I left the call. She later asked me an hour later if I was okay only cause Mia was talking to her because she was trying to help and she asked Guava if I was okay. I texted her 2 hours later " dont worry about it". Deep down I wanted to tell her nO! im not okay, my eyes feel like they burn every time I blinked cause of all the tears, that I felt like my chest was being crushed and I couldn't breath, it feels like I have been dumped in boiling water of how hot I started feeling, how my whole body feels numb, that I was sorry for anything I did that lead her to this choice, and most importantly that I love her, I don't want to leave me. She taught me how it feels to be loved and also how love can hurt as well. Its currently Tuesday 21st, 10:24pm and I haven't talked to her since yesterday at 8:32, my last message being, "Don't worry about it". She has told me before that if this just didn't work out for some reason, that we could still be friends. I said sure, but now looking back at this all, I gave all of my trust to her, and she started to talk to someone else, I forgave her for what she did when I was gone for a few days, saying I didn't want to just argue and just leave, that I wanted to fix whatever issue that would come. I....I trusted her again and she gave me false hopes. Fuked up how she wanted to be back together after I forgave her for what she did, just so she can tell me that she wasn't even sure she meant it when she used to tell me "I love you", and this wasn't even a month later, this was just 9 days after she said she didn't want to take it slow anymore, that she "loved me". Currently its now 10:41pm. I started to type this hoping it would help, seeing it from a third person view. Now I can see that our relationship wasn't really working out, I was putting her over everything else, school, my heath, my time, and even potentially moving back with my mom because of the fact that I chose to live with my dad, but since I've been skipping school, and failing classes because I wouldn't even show up since I was at home, talking to Guava. I changed my whole sleeping schedule so I could give her the most time I could. If I was accused of lying about something during our relationship, I would say, yeah I lied to Guava about something, the fact that I used to tell her not to worry about my sleeping schedule, I use to tell her that I was sleeping great to not worry, but nope, I would get about only 4 hours of sleep for the past month and a half, and that some of the days I was home from school earlier was because of tests, and we got to leave early. I changed so much, not "because of her", but "for her," but looking back at it, there wasn't much she did to try and make it work for my time zone. If you do ever read this, i'm NOT trying to say that I changed my life for the worse because of you, I just want to show you how much I cared about you, what you made me feel for you those first days we met was something real and after time, I really wanted you to be "the one"

I remember that when I first started typing this yesterday, I was feeling depressed, sad, confused. But surprisingly It has made me feel better. If she does ever want to be to be together again but this time, seriously , I wouldn't say no right away, because I would be lying if I said that I don't start felling sad at random times and that I don't miss her even though its only been a bit over 27 hours, but I would tell her to first to earn my trust again and just be friends while we are online for now, Once we are sure that we meet IRL then I will gladly move to the next step.

I love you 3000 baby nugget

#off my chest

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higgins5 · 5 years

Text

Tag game

Oof, this is so so late, but I am doing it! And thank you to the lovely @foxsoulcourt for tagging me!

LAST

drink: Water, we are being healthy children here

phone call: My District Manager at work to discuss my transfer

text message: One of my best friends about his terrible life choices (jk but really binge watching a show for 14 hours straight? Boy get to sleep!)

song you listened to: I’m Over You by Bryan James (it may or may not have been on loop for a while)

time you cried: Last Thursday

EVER

dated someone twice: Haha, yep. Didn’t work out, but we’re still friends

kissed someone and regretted it: Not yet!

been cheated on: Unfortunately

lost someone special: I think we all have, but such is life

gotten drunk and thrown up: Oh god no

fave colors? Sea green, storm gray, oh I can’t believe i almost forgot! Really any deep blue or purple, like how the night sky gets just before it’s almost black

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE I?

made new friends: Multiple, and i am so greatly for all of the lovely people who have graced my life

fallen out of love: Not so much people. But things I believed I loved turned a little false, yes

laughed until you cried: Gosh, all the time. It’s awful, I call it my seal laugh because I’m laughing so hard I can’t breathe and i’m just doubled over hitting a table or my leg to express my joy because that’s all I can do

found out someone was talking about you: Just two weeks ago! And honestly I hate that. Like if you’re gonna talk bad about me just do it to my face. I’ll find out one way or another, might as well be from you

met someone who changed you: Some good people, some not so good people. But I believe it was all for a reason

found out who your friends are: Yes

kissed someone on your Facebook friends list: Hmm... Well, I do not actually have a Facebook so I guess that would be a no

GENERAL

how many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: I guess I can clarify about FB here. My parents were always freaked out about the internet so never let me get one, and being a good child I never did- plus I was just not interested, so I just... never got around to it in adulthood. AND like whenever I needed to talk to a friend through FB I just used my parents page cause that was their solution, so there was no real need. But like, from the friends I had on my mom’s page yes, I know all of them irl

do you have any pets: SEVERAL AND I LOVE ALL OF MY FURRY CHILDREN! I have an 11yo poodle/terrier mix (mom was a poodle, dad was the terrier next door. Truly a scandal) named Bear and i love my grumpy old man to death; a 2yo boxer/husky mix we rescued that was originally supposed to be a lab which was a total lie named Nutmeg, but it’s okay I love my babe even if i can take her on a 3mi run and she’s still ready to run 3 more; an 8yo wonderfully affectionate and beautiful tabby cat named Willow; a 6 year old (oh my god, she’s 6, it feels like yesterday she was a satellite dish in a collar that meowed) purring machine tabby cat named Sage; and two beautiful girls. Lagertha and Gwenievere are two very playful and loving one year old dumbo eared rats

do you want to change your name: Eh, not really. I’ve had it for this long, might as well keep it

what did you do for your last birthday: Oh that was so fun. I went to the Melting pot (this fancy fondue place, so good) With a couple of friends and had a really great time, even though someone got me crayons as a gag gift (I.... hate, crayons with a PASSION, but she’s known me for like 10 years so of course I accepted.... hesitantly)

what time did you wake up today: Like 7:30? but i didn’t actually leave my bed until 9ish because don’t be fooled, I am not a morning person. I just run because I’m an idiot

what were you doing last night at midnight: Sleeping

what is something you can’t wait for: Figure out where life is taking me and then be a bomb ass bitch at it

what are you listening to right now: X&Y by Coldplay

have you ever talked to a person named Tom: I have, and he is a lovely person. Go talk to a Tom everybody, nice people

something that gets on your nerves: Horrible people. Like just those people that are horrible for no absolute reason. Like grow up, get a life, why do you have to make other people just because you’re unhappy. there are many people you could see for help and I have a number you can call if you need a recommendation

most visited website: Probably a tie between Tumblr, Youtube, and Spotify

hair color: Well, naturally I am blonde but rn it’s a reddish auburn color (but hey, people ask me all the time if it’s my natural color so who knows maybe i was destined for this shade)

long or short hair: ish? It’s growing from a pixie (that I might go back to soon) so its like... not quite shoulder length yet but give it another month and we might be there

what do you like about yourself: You know what, i’m gonna give myself some love and say everything. Lol, but as a serious answer probably my personality/nature. I have a very big heart but am also incredibly sarcastic so it is a delicate balance

want any piercings: SO many. I’m saving up to get my nose done soon (nostril) and later I’ll get my daith, helix, third piercing in my lobe, tragus, and maybe rook

blood type: Some kinda O? Honestly for someone who donates blood as much as I do, I should really know (but important blood donation note, if you wish to make sure not to do it too frequently! Healthy people = healthy blood = healthy donation receivers!)

nicknames: Gosh, too many to type. Apparently I’m just nick namey. But uhhh, the most common: Ash, Ashbash, Higgins, Higgy, Higgs, Figgins, Chief

relationship status: Single

zodiac sign: I’m one of the twin fish babes, Pisces all the way

pronouns: She/Her

fave tv show: Don’t watch as much tv as I used to but Supernatural is always a good go to (recently I’ve been watching a lot of HGTv and doctor Phil and Hallmark with my mom though, if that’s anything)

tattoos: None (yet)

right or left handed: right handed, I’m basically useless with my left (unless an instrument is involved)

ever had surgery: Nope, and hopefully we keep that trend goin!

piercings: two ear piercings

sports: Uh... in High School I was pretty active and track and I was a competitive shooter (air rifles- but I’m from Texas so). Nothing in college at the moment, I might try out for the track team just cause i miss bein a part of stuff

vacation: I am broke, I can only dream (but I do really wanna travel, so gotta save up!)

trainers: my totally stylish suede brown vans are my go to, but Adidas for running

eating: Currently? Nothing, but I did have some steamed broccoli and carrots&rice, and grilled chicken for dinner

drinking: Orange Juice

I’m about to watch: Absolutely nothing

waiting for: Didn’t I already answer this? it’s so much pressure. Uh... change?

want: To be successful in whatever I

get married: Eventually

career: Haven’t gotten there yet, but everyday is one step closer

hugs or kisses: Depends on who and when

lips or eyes: Eyes. First thing I notice

shorter or taller: At 5′3 I don’t think I can even pretend to say i’m tall

older or younger: I probably fall more on the younger spectrum

nice arms or stomach: Yes

hookup or relationships: I am a committed relationship kinda person all the way. Never really understood the whole hookup thing but to each their own

troublemaker or hesitant: A hesitant troublemaker is probably more me. I say I try to stay out of trouble, but it just kinda finds me

HAVE I EVER?

kissed a stranger: No

drunk hard liquor: Yes

lost glasses: Ugh, all the time, worst is when I lose my contacts AND glasses

turned someone down: Yes

sex on the first date: Not my style

broken someone’s heart: Yes

had your heart broken: In love and life

been arrested: Nope, and i’d like to keep it that way!

cried when someone died: Yes

fallen for a friend: Yes

DO I BELIEVE IN?

yourself: Well someone has to, so might as well be me!

miracles: I do. And if they aren’t true, at least the belief of their existence helps make their outcome possible

love at first sight: In some fairytale world maybe, but for me, nah

kiss on the first date: Possibly

angels: Yes. Of what way and form I think that’s for you to decide

OTHER

best friend’s name: I have a couple because there is too much life to only need one person in it! Lexi+Brittany+Mauricio+Imaya from all the way back to middle school and Ronan (a recent addition)

And even if we don’t talk every day of our lives I know they’ll always be there for me when I need them. Good or bad. And they know I would do the same. That’s all that really matters in the end. They’re my little chosen family

(oh that got a bit sappy, okay moving on)

eye color: Light blue? Blue? I dunno, people say it’s pretty so I go with it

fave movie: Don’t really have one...

favorite actor: Yeah... same with movies, don’t have one of those either

extrovert or introvert: I like to call myself an introverted extrovert

favorite flower: white peonies

favorite hello kitty character? I wasn’t aware there were characters aside from hello kitty....

oof this is a long post, but very fun to do! Hopefully y’all haven’t done this yet but if so well I’m gonna tag you anyways @i-h8-u-no-u-dont @pansexualpandion @rvmengf @egglorru @it-has-the-gay-fanfiction and really @ anyone who wants to do this! I’d love to see your versions!!

#tag game #personal #honestly these are always so fun #and i am legit just like knocking out everything i never did #its been so long #terribly sorry my loves #im still alive i swear #i said oof at the top and bottom! maybe thats just my thing #oof

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beer-and-breakdowns · 6 years

Note

do all 150 !! :)

Thanks for this Anon, I needed something to do, lmaoo

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

My ex, which was a LOOONG time ago, lol

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

I’d say I’m a bit of both really, if I get to know you, I’d say I’m super outgoing but with new people I tend to be a little shy, unless the person I’m meeting has a lot in common with me personality wise and interest wise.

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

Well, I think I’m going out with one of my best friends tonight so her I guess!:) (But the way I interpret this question, I’m also very excited to see a bunch of bands in the coming year, BFMV, Parkway, Currents, Slayer, Wage War, it’s looking good B))

4. Are you easy to get along with?

I’d say so! :)

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

Yeah, I think so, she’s super kind-hearted.

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

People with common ground with me. Metalheads, laid-back people, fans of the same shit as me, etc.

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

Hahahahahahahanope.

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

My mum bc my parents get back from a holiday today! But also, that one person thats pretty much always on my mind, lol, rip meeee

No, lol

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

One of mutuals!:)

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

Directions of where to find me for someone picking me up from work, lmaoo, HOW EXCITING

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

NOT THIS QUESTION D: This is gonna be hard, and I can almost guarantee it wont be the same when you read this, lol.

Architects - Downfall, Polaris - Lucid, Currents - Forget Me, Architects - Doomsday, Currents - Life//Lost

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

Yeah, kinda lol

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

I believe in luck, I think! Not miracles tho, rip

15. What good thing happened this summer?

Well, it’s not over yet, but DOWNLOAD 2018 YEEEET!!

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

Yeah, why not

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

For sure! I love believing all that crazy shit, its fun, and also very plausible!

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

Nah, lol

19. Do you like bubble baths?

I like baths, but haven’t had a proper bubble bath in years (NO, I’m not a smelly bitch that doesn’t wash, I shower everyday)

20. Do you like your neighbors?

I dont know them super well bc I moved house a couple of years ago but from what I can tell yeah, they’re really nice!

21. What are you bad habits?

Nail biting, mostly. I’m shit with money too if that counts, lol

22. Where would you like to travel?

LITERALLY EVERYWHERE OMG. But a US road trip is on my bucket list!

23. Do you have trust issues?

Nope

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

Probably my nightly music/tumblr session. It’s so relaxing and my music taste is the fuckin’ bomb.

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

Probably my legs tbh, rip

26. What do you do when you wake up?

Scroll social media whilst my PC loads, lol

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

Neither, but if I HAD to choose, darker

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

My closest friends

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

Nah, I don’t recall that anyway, rip

30. Do you ever want to get married?

Definitely! Just, not for a little while

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?

Nope, wish it was tho (not for the pony tail, just want long hair, lol)

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

Alexis Kaufman aaaaaaaaand Emily Kinney, maybe?

33. Spell your name with your chin.

oi9wen, went better than I thought, lol

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

HA no

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

TV 10000000000000%

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

Yup

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

Nothing really, lmaoo! I do try to start a new conversation if I’m not feeling too awkward tho!

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

Ummm, I know them irl, lol. Cute as hell, blonde, blue eyes, funny, kind as fuck, an all-round sweetheart with the looks to match.

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

HMV, lol

40. What do you want to do after high school?

I WANNA PLAY MUSIC FOR A LIVING but that shits hard so idk bc nothing else interest me the way music does:( Maybe something with psychology and killers.

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

Yes, 100%. I fully believe rehabilitation and reformation can work for everyone with the right tools.

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

I’m either super tired or feeling sorry for myself, lmaoo

43. Do you smile at strangers?

Yup, most of the time!

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

Space, even tho I’m scared of heights so getting in the rocket would be an ISSUE. But the ocean is fuckin’ spooky man, I ain’t goin’ down there :o

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

Being awake, lmaoo. I sleep for more hours than I should but I’m not one for staying in bed and once I’m up, I’m up.

46. What are you paranoid about?

Not having a stable life after Uni tbh, the real world terrifies me, lol help. But also, and probably moreso never making any progress with my music and hopeful music career.

47. Have you ever been high?

Nope

48. Have you ever been drunk?

Yeeeeeee

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

Nah

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

Black, probably, I dont normally wear hoodies tbh :o

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

Originally, I was gonna say no, but then I remembered someone that I’ll forever be jealous of, so yes

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

My legs probably hahaha

53. Favourite makeup brand?

What’s makeup?

54. Favourite store?

HMV, again, lol

55. Favourite blog?

Probably either @lovelyfoxes, @meowsonmeows, @emilyharrisxvii and @strawberry-sarcasm

56. Favourite colour?

Black (Dont go telling me that shits a shade and not a colour bc I’ll still say black.)

57. Favourite food?

INDIAN FOOD PLS

58. Last thing you ate?

Katsu chicken

59. First thing you ate this morning?

^^^ Katsu chicken (I woke up late, okay)

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

Nah, not that I can remember lol

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

Nope

62. Been arrested? For what?

7328916312 times. Being annoying :): :))::)::) (No)

63. Ever been in love?

Yup, rip

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

Idk, I kissed a girl. Sorry it was super long ago and I didn’t think much of it at the time, it sorta just happened, lol

65. Are you hungry right now?

Nah, I’m FULL boii

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

No, but some of my tumblr frands are my irl friends

67. Facebook or Twitter?

Twitter 1000000%

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

Tumblr 1000000000000%

69. Are you watching tv right now?

Nope, havent in a while tbh

70. Names of your bestfriends?

Emily, Zac, Laura, Leo, Ethan

71. Craving something? What?

Attention. Of a specific person. YES PLS.

72. What colour are your towels?

White, black and grey.

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

Twooo

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

Nope

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

7328131691

75. Favourite animal?

FOXES. Or wolves. Unless Dinosaurs count.

76. What colour is your underwear?

Grey

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

Vanilla, man

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

Salted Caramel

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

Black, lol

80. What colour pants?

V dark blue

81. Favourite tv show?

Atm, probablyyyyy The Walking Dead, Ray Donovan and WWE, lmaoo

82. Favourite movie?

The Domestics just recently took the spot over Pulp Fiction. WATCH IT.

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

Only seen the first one, lel

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

21 Jump Street

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

Me (Prolly the turtle)

87. First person you talked to today?

My friend Leo

88. Last person you talked to today?

Who knows, probably my friend Emily

89. Name a person you hate?

Most modern “musicians”

90. Name a person you love?

Alexis Kaufman

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

Nope :)

92. In a fight with someone?

Nah, ya boii is mostly pacifist, I wont start shit

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

Like, 1 pair, lol

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

Prolly like 5 or 6?

95. Last movie you watched?

Looper

96. Favourite actress?

Hard to think atm, so probably off the top of my head Emily Blunt.

97. Favourite actor?

Mark Wahlberg or Johnny Depp

98. Do you tan a lot?

Hahahah, thats a massive nope

99. Have any pets?

I used to have a lil cat dude, but nah, not anymore

100. How are you feeling?

I’m goooood :)

101. Do you type fast?

Yeah, lmao

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

Yeah, lol

103. Can you spell well?

Yeah, mostly, I stumble when typing sometimes, but I can correct myself quickly and its usually just a mis-click

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

Yeah, kinda

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

Nope

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

Probably, tbh

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

Nah

108. What should you be doing?

Showering, oops

109. Is something irritating you right now?

Nah, not really! :)

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

Yes yes and YES

111. Do you have trust issues?

Nope

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

Honestly I think it was my friend Emily, lol (U remember if ur reading this, Sax is never a good idea)

113. What was your childhood nickname?

I didn’t really have one :o

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

Yup, been to a few different countries

115. Do you play the Wii?

Used to, lol

116. Are you listening to music right now?

Yeah boiiiiii B)

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

It’s pretty good!

118. Do you like Chinese food?

Ummmm yes

119. Favourite book?

Sorry internet, I’m not a massive reader 3 I don’t really have one :(

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

Nah, used to be as a kid tho

121. Are you mean?

Nah, man

122. Is cheating ever okay?

No. There’s probably a very VERY specific scenario brought on by many other specific actions within a relationship where it might, MAYBE, slightly be the smallest bit justified, but I don’t know what that would be off the top of my head and no one should break someone’s trust like that.

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

Nah, my shoes get dirty no matter where I go, lol

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

Yup

125. Do you believe in true love?

Yeah

126. Are you currently bored?

Nah, I love tumblr asks, dude

127. What makes you happy?

Music, friends and escapsim

128. Would you change your name?

Nah, I’ve come to terms with it now

129. What your zodiac sign?

Libra

130. Do you like subway?

Of course B)

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

I’d prolly see how it goes! :) I certainly wouldn’t complain!

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

One of my mutuals!

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

“No matter what it is we've facedIt's now part of usWe can overcome” - As I Lay Dying - Overcome

134. Can you count to one million?

I think? hahahah

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

I had every single PS2 game ever created... kids, eh?

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

Closed 1000000%

137. How tall are you?

about 5′11″

138. Curly or Straight hair?

Straight hair on me, doesn’t make a difference on others B)

139. Brunette or Blonde?

Blonde (but Brunette is gorgeous too)

140. Summer or Winter?

Summer (But Christmas time is GREAT)

141. Night or Day?

Night, mostly!

142. Favourite month?

October, maybe? Either than or July, idk

143. Are you a vegetarian?

Nope

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

Dark B)

145. Tea or Coffee?

Coffee

146. Was today a good day?

So far, yeah! :)

147. Mars or Snickers?

Mars 100000000%

148. What’s your favourite quote?

“The best thing you can do is follow your dreams“ - James Owen Sullivan (The Rev)

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

Yup, 100%!

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

There isn’t one! :(

THANKS ANON!

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vernons-laugh-is-my-aesthet-blog · 6 years

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Who else on svt (other than jeonghan and dk) do you think is genuinely close?

oooo00000OOOOh b you better grab a chair

I actually think a majority, if not all, of Seventeen is close. They’ve all trained and worked with each other as “seventeen” for so long it’s kinda impossible to not know each other well yaknow? This list is what I’ve seen lately, but I cant be the one to fully judge because I didn’t stan Seventeen from the beginning T-T

Hyung line (s.coups+ Jeonghan+ Joshua)- They have a system going on where S.coups has to make a decision and Joshua and Jeonghan aid in the right path. Kind like in OFD japan where Hoshi and Hyung team fought and Coups was a bit too heated to really make a decision and Jeonghan provided a push and Joshua provided reassurance that it’s the right thing to do to make a meeting and resolve the problem.

S.coups+all members- He needs to be able to know all the members well enough to lead the group. He doesn’t necessarily need to be with them all the time though, and that’s okay

Gamer buds (I think it’s S.coups+Wonwoo+Woozi or Mingyu???)- They play games together lol

Jeonghan+Dk-They’re each other’s favorite roommates. Their personalities clash well like a puzzle. Jeonghan yearns of love and appreciation and someone who can take his jokes well. Dk is just that dude. Someone who smiles through every situation and uses humor as his form of energy.

Americain line (Joshua+vernon)-Joshua talks to Vernon in English and aids him in learning the language and I bet Vernon helps him with writing Korean etc. They both know bits about America and customs there. They first bonded through that and now through their personalities.

Jun+wonwoo?- They are both the type of guys who say a joke that makes everyone uncomfortably laugh, but its okay because they have this thing goin where they tell fans that the other is bad at telling jokes and is unfunny, when irl they are just teasing.

Leader Line (Hoshi+Woozi+S.coups)- To be 3 leaders in a team you need a state of neutrality and know how to work well together. They lead differently. S.coups leads the team, he makes the decisions regarding the well-being of the team. Hoshi leads steps and position he makes sure they look well put together. He is also the hype man. Woozi is the “behind the scenes” man. He creates the music in his studio with no disruptions till its perfect. He doesn’t like the attention, but Seventeen/leaderline tries their best to tell everyone that he has a large role in the creation of Svt to rightfully credit him.

Hoshi+Wonwoo-Mocking each other 24/7. Same age friends. They like to play rough sometimes, but it’s a normal thing

Gag trio (Hoshi+Dk+Seungkwan)- Get together to make people laugh. They are the loud ones who just came to see a smile.I’m pretty sure they have a cheer too so…

Wonwoo+Mingyu-The solid ship. We got puppygyu and tsundere Wonwoo. They are sweet together. Though I heard a fan tried to force the ship irl and it made then drift apart for a while? I think they are coming back together

Woozi+Vernon- Teacher->apprentice. Woozi said he wants a mind like Vernon, the way Vernon thinks is so unique and different from what Woozi would expect. and Vernon said he wants natural talent like Woozi. Not many people shed light on it, but Vernon has a lot of credits alongside Woozi (but not as much ofc) in music production and lyric writing. Woozi appreciates that and they both share the same chill energy when they are not being memes.

Woozi+Jeonghan- Woozi only lets Jeonghan do things to him? But he doesn’t really threaten to hurt him afterwards. He just kinda lets it happen lol.

Mingyu+The8- Now that The8 is coming more out of his shell and isn’t as ‘cute’ as his near debut image, he can finally let out the fashionista inside of him. He roasts tf out of Mingyu and enjoys the same interest as Mingyu in style and designing to the point that they both said that one day they will come out with a brand together. I feel like Mingyu is legit about that, so I look forward to it.

Mingyu+Seungkwan- The relationship they have is funny to me. They do this thing where they tease each other and then the other one acts like he “had enough” and fights the other. They had a vlive together and all they did was “bicker” and it was great lol. That’s how I am with my friends. we just tell each other to stfu and fight all the time and it’s great. Goals amirite?

Chinaline (The8+Jun)- Legendary way of meeting (Jun rippin off The8′s cap and then proceeded to spit onto his face bc he had braces) Had to learn Korean together and know the struggles of leaving their hometown far away to pursue a kpop career. Rn its like a older brother to little brother situation where The8 is the older brother and Jun always tries to mess around with him.

Seungkwan+Vernon- So soft. so so so so so soft. Seungkwan watched his lil boy grow into a man, but still treats him the same. with the constant patpats on Vernon’s face and adoring him and appreciating him. And then vernon always looking at Seungkwan when he talks and laughs at his antics. This as a pure pair.

Seungkwan+Dino- bickering lol. Dino learning how to be sassy from Seungkwan. And Seungkwan being Sh00k from his clapbacks.

Vernon+Dk- Same birthday bros. They are memes together and apperently Dk really wants to meet Vernon’s lil sister. Vernon refuses. lol same.

Dino+Jeonghan?-Dino nugu aegi is a joke among Carats etc, but Dino wasnt much of a fan of it. He is grown now as stated by him which is a loss for poor affectionate Jeonghan. I’m not saying their connection is splitting, but it is sure being grinded down bc Dino doesnt like being babied anymore T-T

Dino+Hoshi-Same thing with Jeonghan kinda. I think Hoshi is trying to get the kid in Dino to come back out again. But Hoshi also respects his work ethic and ability to help choreograph.

If I were to condense the most within-group social members it would go:

S.coups-Everyone needs to be comfortable with the leader and he needs to now his members well in order to lead right

Jeonghan- Though he likes to joke a lot, members depend on him for advice and help in difficult times. And he is always there to listen

Hoshi- Seventeen’s hype man. When the members feel slow in energy they can look to him to find a push and strive for perfection with matching passion as him

Dk-Ability to make the room light and happy. He knows how to joke well and the members appreciate it

Seungkwan-pushing Seventeen to be more out there. With his amazing variety and Mcing skill, he always tries to get the more quiet members to show up on camera and talk a bit

Mingyu- Does a lot for the group behind the scenes like cooking and cleaning. The backbone of the dorm lol. All members know him well. He is also social outside of the group.

Vernon-Due to this kid’s slow and l o s t (lol) nature, all Seventeen members feel a need to protect him. They all agree that he is very unique and 4d. Always living in his own word that they need to pull him back to the real world to ge him focused sometimes.

The8- Before was pretty quiet, but as his Korean improves so does his social skills. He is now able to talk more freely to members and ask what a certain word means without being scared of messing up

Joshua-Joshua is the type to be quiet most of the time, but has bursts of randomness. I feel like, like myself, though he doesn’t talk too much, he is always listening and observing (thats why he is good help for s.coups when making decisions)

Wonwoo- Wonwoo is an introvert and has trouble showing a lot of emotion. He does have a bubbly side though and its seen in his nose crinkles.

Woozi-Woozi kinda chooses to be left alone. He prefers to work alone undisturbed and I think sometimes overworks himself. The members always point out his achievements bc woozi is not the type to shout it out himself.

Jun- Jun is really 4d and sometimes childish. The members love him of course, but sometimes his jokes can be too odd for everyone to grasp when he comes in and out of a conversation.

Dino- Dino is growing up and is finding individuality. So he will prob. not be playing along with the hyungs things like he used to before. But I hope he goes back to just joking around like that bc just bc you’re grown doesn’t mean you can’t be childish ^-^

There are many more combos I probably missed. I is overwhelmed my dude. Some of my stuff might even look full of shit to others. idk lol

#dammit anon you made me write a book #jk #Why do I do this to myself?#Seventeen #observations #I could of answered without explaining?#text #ships #kpop #there are typos #b e t

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