#this is what everyone who says -queer is a slur- sounds like

[willandmichael]

heteronormativity + mike being bullied for being queer

season 1, episode 3

this scene stars with mike, lucas and dustin talking about el’s powers, lucas says “she’s not a superhero, she’s a weirdo” and mike defends el saying “why does that matter? the x-men are weirdos” - which btw sounds a lot like jonathan saying there’s nothing wrong with “being a freak”. there was a song playing in the background here, but i couldn’t find which one it was (it stops when troy and james show up).. if anyone is able to identify it, please let me know!

right after that little bit of dialogue about el, we get into heteronormative territory

of course lucas is not to blame here!! he’s just a child and it’s the 80s, he’s just teasing his friend because he thinks mike is crushing on el - even though in his mind he’s just taking care of her and she's the only one who can find will. (also very interestingly.."i love you so much!” / “you can’t even write it, mike” but i’m not gonna talk about the “i love you” bit, we already know how that went).

here, mike is expected to like el - to have a crush on her! he dismisses it, he doesnt indulge in it like many other boys would. he’s literally like “stop it, lucas! it’s not like that” and then..

troy and james show up to bully them once again, targeting mike specifically about will’s disappereance and about being queer

so the entire scene goes: lucas is teasing mike about liking el, mike goes “what are you talking about??” and tells lucas to stop when he’s saying he loves her and wants to marry her. then here comes his bullies basically saying “yeah lucas, stop that. he doesn’t like el because he’s queer and his other queer friend is now dead!” mike tries to ignore him but troy makes him fall on his face and hurt himself - which basically a warning: and that’s going to happen to you too (yeah, it almost does when troy makes mike jump off the quarry. that was mike being hatecrimed because that’s what the whole town thinks happened to will).

so it’s no surprise that later on mike attaches himself to el, not only does everyone expect him to, he also wants to prove that his bullies are wrong. he doesn’t want to deal with them anymore, and if he has a girlfriend then he’s not queer and he’s going to be left alone.

and i feel like it needs to be reiterated everytime how every scene and bit of dialogue is intentional, the way this was set up is very deliberate. there is a reason mike gets homophobic remarks and slurs thrown at him (and regarding will) right after denying he likes el.

a little bit of color coding?

there is a LOT of blue in this scene, very green scenery with hints of yellow on their clothing. the girls in the back are wearing red, yellow and blue jackets

mike is wearing a green shirt with blue lines, a muted/pale yellow jacket with red lining. the wall behind him is blue with white lines

the most.. curious.. part is troy and james wearing blue and yellow, and troy’s shirt having red, blue and yellow lines (and his jacket looks a lot like the wall behind mike). the orange is interesting since orange is a combination of red and yellow. none of it is BRIGHT yellow though, only a muted beige (like something that is already there but you don’t notice it)

bonus: i love that this scene ends with both dustin and lucas comforting mike right away by changing the subject to what they were doing earlier, looking for rocks <3

#byler #byler tumblr #byler analysis #maybe someone already analyzed this scene but i never came across it #sorry if it's all over the place tho #but seriously if anyone knows what song was playing send me a message #mine

[ask-spider-punk-13666]

Identity

Word Count: ~900 [CW: internalized homophobia, homophobic slurs (self identified)]

Summary: Tommy has something to tell Gwyn, but things don't always go to plan.

January, 1984 - Tommy's Bedroom

Tommy wipes his palms on his pant legs for the fourth time in as many minutes, gritting his teeth in frustration. Why is this so hard? Either she'll take it well, or she won't, but not knowing is worse, and he's never going to know anything if he just keeps sitting here without saying it.

"Gwyn, there's something I need to tell you," he says. He can't look at her, though, so he stares at his shoes instead. The sole is starting to come loose, but he can't afford a new pair.

"Of course, babe. You can tell me anything."

Tommy doesn't wince at the endearment, too used to Gwyn's casual affection, but it chafes at him, somewhere deep below the surface.

"I'm not who you think I am. I've been lying to you, to my Uncle, to everyone, and I'm tired. I can't keep hiding from you, Gwyn. You're my best friend," he says, hating how his voice is getting tight, or how he keeps babbling instead of getting to the fucking point.

"Tommy..." she says gently, mattress sinking when she sits down next to him. "It's okay. I already know."

...what?

Tommy’s blood runs cold. Had he been so obvious, even before he figured it out for himself? His thoughts are racing, wondering if she’d noticed how focused he’d been when they watched John Travota prance around a Ford De Luxe on movie night, or maybe she’d seen how his eyes had lingered a little too long when Harry Osborn climbed the rope in gym class. Have other people noticed? How long until he stopped knowing even a minute of peace? Until even the adults who tolerated him left him for the wolves? What about his uncle?

"What? What do you mean, 'you know?'"

"The lying, the missed practices, the bruises. You're Spider-Punk. I've known for a while."

Yeah, Tommy definitely missed something.

He gapes, for a moment, mouth opening and closing a few times without a sound before he manages to find his words—

"What? No."

—and then they just don't stop.

"I mean, yeah. We can do that too, while we're at it, but that's not— that's not what I meant. Well, I would have told you, right after this, even, but that isn’t what I was trying to say. I am Spider-Punk, but that's— it's not—"

Apparently, his confusion is letting him skip right over the panic of Gwyn somehow knowing his secret identity, but not letting him find the right words to say what he actually wants to. He just keeps babbling.

"Tommy, honey, take a breath. What's this about?"

Fuck it. Who cares whether they're the "right" words?

"I'm gay, Gwyn," he blurts, and everything goes silent, like even the shitty pipes are too scared to break the tension with their usual clanging.

"What?"

"I'm gay," he says again, and it comes out easier, even if it hurts more. "I'm queer. A fairy. A fucking faggot, if you prefer." He spits the words like a curse. It definitely feels like one.

Why me? Isn't my life hard enough!?

His eyes are burning and Gwyn is still just staring at him. She doesn't look disgusted, but maybe she’s just in shock, processing this huge bombshell.

"Say something," he rasps, "please?"

She doesn't respond, not with words, anyway. Instead, she surges forward, wrapping her arms around him and tucking her face into the crook of his neck. It takes him painfully long to reciprocate, movements halting and awkward with surprise. This has to be a good sign. Right?

They stay like that for a long moment, with only the sound of shaky breathing and the background hum of the heater to fill the silence. Eventually, though, Gwyn is the first to pull away. She doesn’t go far, just enough so they're face to face. Her eyes are just as damp as his own.

"Me too," she confesses.

"What?"

"I'm gay. More of a dyke than a fairy, actually. Men? Not really my thing."

Oh.

Tommy doesn't know how to respond to that, other than to pull her back into a hug, burying his own face in her shoulder. It's probably for the best, because he starts to bawl like a baby, choking on the overwhelming mix of emotions that crashes over him. It's almost too much to parse and he feels like he's drowning, pulled under a riptide of relief-joy-trust. 

He's mourning a bit, too. Grieving for the normal life he could have had— that they could have had. It’s one thing to admit such things to himself, but admitting it to another person— to Gwyn— makes it all the more real. 

And it hurts. Each strangled sob is soothing agony— like the gangrenous decay of fear-shame-isolation being cut from healthy flesh.  He hadn’t realized he was suffocating until he could finally breathe again.

He can’t stop crying and Gwyn's not doing much better, if the wetness of Tommy's collar or her shaking shoulders are anything to go by. She’s clutching onto him like a lifeline and Tommy? Tommy is independent. He stands on his own because he’s never had a choice, so it’s… terrifying to rely on others for support, but he’s holding onto her just as fiercely. Sharing the burden instead of stumbling under the weight of everything. It’s indescribable.

Tommy doesn't think he's ever connected with anyone the way he does with Gwyn.

#story post #gwyn stacy #coming out #f slur #d slur #internalized homophobia

[lesbian-toddhoward]

“Ahhhh the good ol days of the 80s when nobody was offended by WORDS…” sound familiar? this is what you sound like

Im not arguing for or against usage of slurs or whatever bc its ultimately an individual decision and people have a right to use the language that suits them but making this broad appeal to this nebulous “queer elder” archetype or “queer history” and acting like everybody back then all had the same opinions and universally thicker skin is just blatant conservatism. L

1. i didnt say that, if someone doesnt want to be called fag/dyke/ect. thats their own business, and people need to respect that and their wishes. hell, i dont like being called queer or a faggot unless it's by fellow lgbt members or people im close to because i was bullied with those words. it has a sting that i know a lot of people are familiar with concerning the names like fag and dyke, so i understand it and i wouldn't expect everyone to be okay with being called those words.

2. i know not everyone had the same opinions (hell lgbt people today cant all agree on one thing lol). i know that there were people back then who didn't like to be called those words, i understand that. but i would say that the majority (or at least a large part) of people took those words back and used them to describe their communities, families, and friends.

so no, not an L

#anonymous

[underwhelmingalchemist]

I love the idea of Stede not realizing he's in love with Ed until the conversation with Mary for a few reasons.

First of all, there's the obvious angle of Steve being completely oblivious despite everyone else being able to see completely clearly that the two of them are head over heels for each other. Which is objectively just a very fun approach.

There's also the idea that Stede has been penalized for his emotions in the past, and that because of that, he's so out of touch with them that he can't recognize that he's in love until all the evidence is staring him in the face. All his life he's been bullied and belittled for not being the portrait of masculinity, for being "sensitive" or for having an appreciation for the world around him, and eventually his own internal experience became foreign to him.

But the one I want to focus on today is the idea that, in talking with Mary and realizing that he was in love with Ed, Stede finally realized who he was.

When Stede was a child, he was othered and bullied for his less traditionally masculine traits. We see him picking flowers, or not wanting to watch his father butcher poultry. He's tied to a rowboat and forced to kiss a horse and called every insult under the sun. He is different than the others, and is treated accordingly.

Gender nonconformity is not essential to the queer experience. Every queer person has a different relationship to their gender and various forms of attraction that are inextricably linked to things like race, AGAB, culture, upbringing, environment, social and economic status, etc. But nonconformity with traditional gender roles has been socially linked with queerness. We see this when a boy who cries in class is called gay by his classmates, or when a girl is called a slur for playing sports, or a kid being called a queer for wanting to wear any clothes that don't match their AGAB.

We see Stede being bullied for his gender nonconformity, and later as an adult, we see him navigating an arranged marriage with Mary. Stay with me, I promise these two things are related.

We see Stede in the carriage with his father, stating that when he'd wanted to marry for love. Stede does not look particularly young in this scene, and later when we see the children he will eventually have, they seem to not be that old. From this we can conclude that he had time to find a wife, had time to find that love, and never truly found it in anyone else. He sounds hopeful when he says he wanted to marry for love, like he'd been holding out for it for a long, long time without much luck.

So far in his life, Stede has been unable to find peers because of his gender nonconformity and unable to find love for what he likely believes is the same reason.

And then he gets married and has children and builds a life, but he's never truly invested. He finds "discomfort in a married state" and is shown to be distant from his family, unable to form a connection with Mary and his children. But unlike with Mary, we do see him having positive interactions with his children, be it playing pirates or his daughter splitting the orange.

But with Mary, he was never able to love her in the way he needed to. Mary says that she hears him crying sometimes, when he's alone. He's discontent and disconnected, living in a loveless marriage with a life he finds unfulfilling. The role he's expected to fill by society is one that he finds ill-fitting. He wasn't able to fill the hard-working, rough around the edges shoes his father wanted him to, he wasn't able to be traditionally masculine schoolboy that would have earned him the respect of his peers, and now he isn't able to play the role of a traditional husband to his wife and father to his children.

When he goes to sea, he brings the lighthouse painting Mary painted him with him. He clearly has some regret for his past with his family, and later reflects forlornly that he was supposed to be a lighthouse, and ultimately failed at that task. He's still clinging to what he sees as a personal shortcoming: his inability to be a loving husband and patriarch.

And then he meets Ed.

Ed Teach, the eccentric pirate that rules the seven seas, that loves fine fabrics and marmalade, has a flair for the dramatic, and thinks that everything Stede has been shunned for in the past makes him into a fascinating man that is worthy of his respect and affection.

Ed, who teaches him to embrace who he is and makes him feel like he's never felt before. Ed, who sacrifices his livelihood in order to save Stede from a firing squad.

Ed, who kisses him on a beach.

And it still doesn't click, because he doesn't know how to interpret it.

And then he goes home, and once again, he's the failed patriarch. His family almost seems better off without him, especially Mary. Even nothing seems better than his attempts at connection with his family.

In a pub he's surrounded by people clamoring for stories about Blackbeard, and when he tells him the truth, that he was absolutely lovely to him, he's immediately forced to backtrack and give them what they want: gritty details about a life of piracy. They don't want to hear about his relationship, and any hint at its existence earns him immediate social backlash.

Mary is doing better than ever, and Stede is struggling to readjust, trying his best to be the man he thinks he should be.

And then the murder attempt and subsequent talk with Mary happen.

And then everything clicks into place.

He's in love with Edward Teach.

And suddenly, everything makes sense. He wasn't ever broken, or inadequate, or unworthy of love. He wasn't unable to be what everyone wanted him to be because he was damaged or incomplete.

He was just gay.

And in that moment, he confesses it to Mary. And he's met with a smile and a hug, because it suddenly all makes sense to her too. Her attempts were never enough not through any fault of her own, but because Stede was never meant for that life.

And then the rest of their lives begin as they're given the key to moving on.

#long post #EXTRA long post in fact #i'm rewatching OFMD can you tell? #i have a lot of thoughts about it #thank you for reading my dissertation /j #ofmd #our flag means death #ofmd meta #our flag means death meta #blackbonnet #stede bonnet

[xxxjarchiexxx]

my understanding of tumblr drama transmisogyny event of the moment is:

people, both homestuckies and not homestuckies alike, votes homestuck in the queer poll for a variety of reasons ranging from "itll be funny" to "the media itself helped the nb creator come out" to "most of the characters are queer" to "it inspired undertale"

people who voted dtwof, predominately tme people, started posting about how the people who voted homestuck should kill themselves and that hussie should kill themself

a few transfem homestuck bloggers said that behavior was transmisogynistic, some of whom were white and some of whom were not white

at some point, an infamous transmisogyny-doer posted about how homestuck is racist

someone sent an anon to a white transfem person that said infamous transmisogyny-doer started the backlash on the poll

the transfem said she was not surprised given he is transmisogynistic

he posted like 20 times about how she was erasing the racism in homestuck and when asked for proof provided a screenshot of her saying flippantly and homestuck aged like fine wine

she gets harassed by people claiming she said things she did not

to prove that she does not think homestuck isn't racism, she mentioned her bookclub of homestuck that is discussing the racism today

she gets harassed for speaking over black people (???? a black person is leading the talk)

her friends of color back her up on their existence and the fact they are leading the discussion as well and that she didn't say what she is purported to have said

he calls them gender and racial slurs for defending her saying something she did not say (would be fucked up if she did tho)

he reads quotes from her in a shitty voice

she refers to said voice as a deep masculine voice

it was apparently his normal voice, so that does suck

she calls him a man because he is one

he says hes not a man because hes bigender

beef over because they both move on

tldr an anon misrepresented what was said by someone who's lied about transfems before to a transfem during a wave of transmisogynistic backlash and she believed the claim, he responded by vagueposting with things that aren't true, she was harassed as a result and everyone she knows was like a little bit hatecrimed about it, and also she did a microaggression maybe depending on what the voice note sounds like compared to his other voice notes which im not factchecking bcuz regardless it is insane that it got to that point.

[lostryu]

Personally, I love calling myself queer. It is liberating and makes me feel excited about who I am. It is upsetting when people tag my identity as a slur.

For starters, anon, I am so happy that queer makes you feel empowered and content with yourself! I am not saying that people cannot identify as such, I am saying not everyone has the exact same feelings when it comes to slur reclamation. We are not a hive mind and while you take comfort in it, others do not. The tagging system is a way for others to protect themselves or friends, and a way to filter things out when said people are not in a good space to interact with potentially triggering content.

Here’s an analogy for lack of a good way to explain. Say you love the rain. You love splashing in the puddles, getting wet, and sailing little leaf boats in the gutter. Any time there is a rainstorm you are the first outside.

Alex, however, does not like the rain. It could be a personal thing, like they don’t like how the water sticks to their skin, the sound or smell, or maybe they had a terrible accident during a rainstorm. Regardless you both are friends.

Because you respect Alex’s boundaries, when you both need to go outside during a rainstorm, you don’t say anything when they put on their rain jacket and boots. You don’t rip their jacket off and insist that they take joy in the rain no matter what. You respect their boundaries, and when you need to cross a puddle, you’re always the first to lay your jacket across so Alex can walk safely through it without getting wet.

Above is an example of why some people tag for slur usage. They might love using the word queer, but out of respect for friends that do not, they still tag accordingly. There is nothing bad about this basic respect and chivalry online. If you are that upset about someone caring about other people, you need to sit down and reflect.

#ask #anon #q slur #i guess this is discourse? #q slur discourse #idk i just think mutual respect isn’t something we should forget

[wine-mom-wheeler]

After scrolling through the tag for a while and seeing everyone go into a state of panic because of the Noah and Millie interview, I wanted to give some thoughts. This is more or less an incoherent rant, you’ve been warned. Just as a side note I’m not trying to start an argument with anyone online so if you decide to be hostile I’ll block you bbg. I will not be addressing the article but the unlabeled Will discourse that has sparked because of it. Anyways.

Also minor tw some slurs are mentioned and mentioned negative use of the word queer.

I don’t understand what’s wrong with Will being unlabeled. Like they way some of you are framing it seems homophobic. It sounds like you’re saying that unlabeled people aren’t queer. Which they most definitely are and if you think otherwise why is that? The whole modern queer movement is about rejecting heteronormativity, and labels are a part of that.

Of course the 80s gay liberation movement was different form the one today. But at its core it strove to abolish gender norms and the nuclear family. Gay and Lesbian were terms that people used then as a form of their own liberation and a way to distance themselves from heteronormativity. So would Will being unlabeled really make sense? (the answer is yes).

*disclaimer, you can headcanon Will’s sexuality however you want. It still has not been confirmed only heavily coded. All we know is that he is some sort of queer.

I think it makes a lot of sense for Will to be unlabeled looking into how his character is written. He’s been the subject of homophobic bullying for his entire life. Even his dad called him gay. So it’s makes sense that the terms gay, queer, fairy etc would trigger unwanted memories and trauma. I think it makes more sense for someone like Mike to use the label gay (I don’t think he'd use the term bi since there was a lot of biphobia back then but feel free to debate that, respectfully of course).

Robin is an unlabeled character yet I haven’t seen any discourse about that. Would you like for her to be confirmed lesbian. All we know is that she likes women and not men. So why can’t that be the same for Will. We know he likes Mike and we can be pretty sure he doesn’t like women at all. That’s all we really need to know… sorta. That argument is constantly used by straight people, “why does it matter?” It matters because we need confirmation a character is queer and in passed media we’ve only gotten heavily queer characters. Ones that never got into relationships and were only queercoded or had offhand mentions like “oh yeah I’m living with my roommate” or “I’m not interested in dating a girl/boy right now.”

For the older queer people in the fandom, in your head what would it be like for them to keep Will unlabeled. Would it be similar to Robin or something like what I just stated in the previous paragraph?

But that’s not really what the duffer brothers would be doing (if byler is canon which it will be, just has not been confirmed yet). If Mike and Will end up together and explicitly say they’re a couple/dating then they aren’t really running from confirming the characters as queer. They are telling their audience outright that they love each other. They don’t need Will to say he's gay in order for their relationship to be valid.

In my humble opinion I think if they had Will have a coming out scene it'd feel forced. 1. Because coming out is pretty heteronormative and a way for cishet people to separate queer people from them. Queer people shouldn’t need to declare their truth just like straight people. All the power to you if you want to come out, it’s your decision of course that’s just how I see it. 2. The duffers shouldn’t have to handhold their audience in order to get across that Will is gay. If he’s in a relationship with Mike then it’s pretty obvious. Yes there are slimy incel Elon Musk stans who will debate it on Reddit but like so what. They are a small portion of the audience and for the most part everyone will understand how Will feels.

I think the only person it makes sense for Will to explicitly come out to would be Mike. I think Will knows Mike would need concrete confirmation and reassurance that Will is gay and has feelings for him. As for everyone else I don’t think Will would want to come out to everyone else in the party. I don’t even think he'd come out to his mom and Jonathan, I think he'd just be open if he was dating Mike.

I know one argument is that not confirming Will as gay is them being afraid to say it. But are they afraid to said it if they’ve shown homophobia and that whole Justin/Erica interaction? /gen.

I mentioned earlier how I think it makes more sense for Mike to call himself explicitly gay. He hasn’t been bullied the way Will has. He’s spent most of his life not knowing the feelings he has deep down for his friend, all he knows is that they aren’t normal. Mike identifying as gay could be comforting to him given his circumstances as supposed to Will who has bad memories surrounding those labels. I can imagine Mike saying to Nancy or his mom “I’m gay” way more than I can Will.

Tldr; I think Will is gay as fuck but they don’t have to say it, and for all u bylers worrying about the article, don’t pay too much attention to it. All the evidence trumps it and I think we should just live laugh Byler

#byler #will byers #mike wheeler #stranger things 4 #byler is endgame #st4 #mike wheeler is gay #byler is canon #will byers is gay #stranger things

[skrimply]

this shit makes me so mad lol!!!!!!!!!!!! not only has there gotta be some bias in there of like, if you often use the word queer as an umbrella term then your followers, who will be seeing the poll, probably are already people who do the same.

BUT THEN to word this shit in such a way to say "the only people who don't like the word being used are straight." this is the shit that makes more and more people claim you're an "assimilationist" or whatever the fuck for not wanting to be forcibly called a slur you dont identify with. this is what makes people say "you may be gay but are you queer?" whatever THAT means!!!!!

its so gross to say that the ONLY groups of people who dont like it are straight people and hateful groups. what about people who have trauma around the word, hm? or the gay people who just think being called a slur randomly by other gay people sounds exactly the same as when its from a bigot?

of course the majority of people say thats what we should use when its forced when its just what everyone else is doing including fucking bank of america, when its no longer being reclaimed but forced and if you dont like it you're not really gay. when its being sold on tshirts at fucking target!!!! when cishet people get to say it now but its okay this time because its just not a slur anymore!!! as if thats how slurs work!!

#AAAAAHHHHH #sorry this made me so mad lol #diary

[opinated-user]

I'm Jewish. My dad is Muslim. I'm multiracial (Beta Israeli/Ethiopian on my mom's side, Berber/Indigenous North African + Albanian on my dad's). Lily comparing self-identifying as queer to a Nazi using a slur made me so angry I remember physically shaking with rage, and her refusal to listen to anyone who actually knows queer history just made it worse. I know what it sounds like when someone is shouting slurs. I know the intent. I see the hatred in their eyes that is deeply rooted and would motivate more extreme and physical actions if only they knew they could get away with it. I know what it's like to be viewed as less than human, less than a person, lower in someone's eyes than fictional characters who they scream at me need to remain white as if I personally have declared war on them personally because there's a show or a movie with a non-white lead. I've been spat on, kicked, shoved into 'accidentally' until I smack into walls and lockers and I have been pushed down a flight of stairs and broken my shoulder due to racists bullying me. I have heard my father called a terrorist and a sand-n*gger, I heard my second teacher call my mother a n*gger and compliment her on having 'good hair for a black woman' and saying 'she's so well-spoken' as a compliment. I'd heard my brother called a thug, a gangster, intimidating, creepy, all for being soft-spoken and bad at eye contact. I've been taken aside by security at local events from flea markets to art exhibits with small souvenir stands and been searched and treated like I'm a chronic criminal who needs to be kept in check, a risk the white people have to manage, a cancer infecting their perfect progressive white city where no one can be racist because hey we have a Hispanic mayor and we voted for a black president once.

Someone identifying with a word that brings them joy is not the same thing. I'm not queer, I can't speak to the lived experiences of the queer community, but I've seen girls reclaim 'bitch', I've seen black men reclaim the N-word, and early on when I was a kid I took the word white girls used to mock me, coal (my last name begins with Kol, pronounced the same) and told them, "Diamond comes from coal. Nothing good comes out of you." and hung onto that so hard that to this day comments about my dark skin that use the word remind me of my father telling me, the first time I was called that and cried, that diamonds come from coal and that I'm the most precious thing in the world to him.

I'm not queer. I don't know what the word means to y'all. But I have a pretty good guess and it's not the same thing as a slur. It's an affirmation. It's like me saying yeah, I'm dark as coal - yeah, you're not cishetallo, and there's nothing wrong with that just like there's nothing wrong with being dark skinned. There's nothing wrong with who you are and having a word that embodies that feeling is so uplifting and so sustaining emotionally. Lily Orchard wanting to take that away from people is appalling. Not wanting to use it herself? Totally valid. Not everyone is cool with the same word. The lead singer of the band Korn is attracted to multiple genders but hates the word bi because his childhood sexual abuse happened at the hands of a bi man, for instance. If Lily had similar discomfort with it - "don't use it for me, it reminds me of X, and thus it has negative connotations to me" - then I wouldn't have an issue with it at all.

But telling people what they can and cannot draw strength from, what they're allowed and not allowed to say, is unacceptable. And trying to gaslight people into thinking that finding a home in the queer community and under the queer label is not only bad somehow, but on par with a Nazi yelling a slur? That's abusive. That's manipulating strangers into feeling like shit based on her opinions rather than on facts. That's trying to take away their joy, their community, and their right to identify as they so choose. And for what? So total strangers won't use a word she doesn't like. Absolutely, utterly fucking disgusting, just like white people policing black people's language or Christians people saying you can't use words like Torah or Quran because it's confusing so you don't get to use your own words in their presence anymore.

IDK, I've waffled a lot on sending this in (I've had this tab open for a few hours as I mull it over, tbh) because I'm not queer and I don't want to speak for anyone but myself and I certainly don't want to speak over any of you - your voices should be centered in conversations about queerphobia, 100%. But that was definitely the moment I gave up on Lily.

I'm know I'm not queer but queer people, I just want you to know: you are not wrong to want your label that gives you community and power. You have nothing in common with the people I've seen spit slurs and live to hate and hurt others. You are in the right here. Lily is in the wrong. You have done nothing wrong and to whatever limited degree I'm able to as a straight person, I do try to educate people on why the 'queer is a slur' rhetoric is TERF-y and how flawed it is. I will fight for your words because you have the right to be called what you want when you want by who you want and I hate this monster for trying to take your rights away from you just for her own sick satisfaction.

Lily Orchard, when she screams and rants, sounds more like the actual slur-using Neo Nazis I've met than anyone in the queer community ever has.

(Sorry for the long post. I just have a lot of disdain for how LO treats minorities and marginalized people.)

i don't think i have anything else to add, anon, this was very kind of you.

#lily orchard

[marie-0llie]

Will warn you: I will use a few slurs.

ugh im starting to get tired of seeing shit all over the internet that never actually focuses on what matters most.

Love one another. Appreciate one another. Love yourself.

i keep seeing posts about boycotting companies who are actively harming civilians in Palestine, posts about how some people shouldnt say tranny when they fall somewhere under or close to the trans umbrella, or getting pissed at other people for identifying as a faggot, dyke, tranny, trap, whatever. or just basic age old things like bi lesbians, mspec lesbians, afab enbies and amab enbies (disgusted that i have to split the two, but i digress)

it just seems like we're all full of rage, trying to gatekeep queerness or trying to stop something that is genuinely outraging. like. im tired. its hard for me to look at or scroll by another post about murdered children in Palestine, or about how another trans woman is dead on the streets.

I'm tired. It's all draining of my morale and daily energy. Or spoons, popsicle sticks, mental energy, what have you.

I know, it may sound like I want everyone, including myself to ignore all of this bad shit that we need to focus on,

but its not. at all. I want everyone to start sharing love. Give your loved ones individual, specific complements. Do something nice. Make someone happy. Bake a cake for your polycule, if baking is your destressor. Post cute cats! Awesome facts! Give us the happy energy. The happier we are, no natter the situation, can drastically change our outlook on the world. We don't share positivity enough.

**Hope is our greatest tool.**

Making people see only issues and putting them in a bad mood doesn't particularly help solve problems. Make people happy. Motivated. Energetic. Make them feel hope. Make them feel like they can change something. Give someone a dosage of hope and they can sure as hell do good. Good enough to save a homeless queer person. Good enough to save at least one child stuck in the Gaza Strip. Good enough to influence others around them to share hope.

That hope, that spark could influence the lives of people around you and could even help the generations to come live a better life. That is the goal, no?

And it allows you to truly show that no one person is alone.

Respect an identity. Make someone feel seen. Make them feel happy. Make them motivated to help us all out of the pit that our ancestors (and soon to be ancestors) put us in.

And most importantly,

I love you. The universe loves you.

Ad astra per aspera.

#196 #trans #nonbinary #lgbtq

[kudzucataclysm]

answering this portion of the q from earlier-

There’s honestly plenty of potential ‘bad’ takes about SE and the story’s characters that anyone out there can make- maybe they make assumptions based off the trigger warnings or themes, maybe they see my little doodles and mini comics about just how fucked up these characters are and it’s not their cup of tea, etc etc. Weirdly enough tho, that’s something that i’m looking…forward to seeing? Like just the potential drama and arguments over certain things/plotlines/characters in this story sounds like it’d be juicy. I can see a future me holding a glass of wine laughing maniacally at the computer screen all giddy with excitement over it. or something idk-

BUT specific takes….here’s a rough list (ALL COMPLETELY HYPOTHETICAL):

“Lack of wholesome queer characters and plotlines” or something along those lines. Something to the tune of “i’m using fiction to escape reality so i don’t want any queer stories to be edgy and dark and violent, i want all the characters to be pure cinnamon rolls who’ve never done anything wrong EVER”, and just make assumptions about SE over the majority of the cast being queer AND horrible people. Like if SE isn’t your thing, that’s fine. But if someone were to say that its shit for including darker themes then I’d feel like they’d need to retake some highschool english classes or something

“This story puts queer people in a negative light” Shocking development at 1am EST…QUEER PEOPLE CAN BE EVIL AND DO HORRIBLE BAD THINGS!!! THE HORROR

“Why isn’t everyone’s identity and pronouns spelled out for me from the moment they’re introduced” cause immmm lazyyyyy and don’t really consider their identities as super ultra mega important in a way-

“WHY ARE THERE SLURS!!! WHY ARE SOME OF THE CHARACTERS RACIST!!!!!! THIS IS CONDONING-“ the world ended in the 1960s and everything got worse from there. the door is that way 👉🏼

“Everyone in this story is fucked up. Nobodies normal, all of these characters are just terrible, horrible people, how do i root for them” then i’ve accomplished SOMETHING that i’ve wanted to do FOREVER-

“Why is the protagonist such a crybaby”. He’s 14 and a little bit fucked up okay. and he IS a baby so THERE

“Why is the protagonist boring” Cuz i’m tired of the ‘uwu powerless softie turns out to be the son of fucking GOD all along’ trope in a way. Dez is important in his own way and this just makes the story more interesting when cosmic forces are pushing down on him and his bestie and he kinda has to go a little loco to deal with it

“Why is the protagonist chubby/fat, it just isn’t realistic for the setting and type of story” what if i killed you violently with a rock

“The Martians aren’t realistic and their biology/culture/behavior is confusing” yes it’s meant to be. They’re artificially created, their eyeballs function as ovaries, their blood is literal oil and they go off like nukes when they die. It’s meant to be kind of stupid and self indulgent and their origins are a mystery to themselves

“The Martians do incest? That means you SUPPORT incest!!!” No, absolutely not. The story doesn’t even make it in a positive light, it’s very much a product of their oddly misogynistic, mysterious culture, and isn’t touched upon too much in the story. Also they’re aliens and don’t follow the same biological rules as humans at ALL.

“Francis is terrible trans rep” SHE’S MEANT TO BE TERRIBLE

“Francis’s alcoholism is condoning underage drinking” Okay man

“Everything is way too convoluted and there’s just too much going on, who would want to read this” MEEEEEEEEE!!!! I WANNA READ THIS

“This story glorifies child abusers cuz of the existence of a character like Thursday and how he’s often portrayed-” Are you hearing yourself rn. stop and think. for a Moment ✋🏼🛑

“I can’t believe you’re trying to paint Friday/Hammond as a good person for-“ when. When did I say that. I’ve been explicitly saying that they’re both wrong this entire time-

“Having the man-eating Martians and Chimera be brown skinned is racist” shore thangggg buddy

that’s all i can think of off the top of my head rn…tbh i think the fake ones from before are a lot better than these ones LOL

#talking and blathering #shattered earth #in a weird way. oh well! #hope no one sees this-

[urmomsstuntdouble]

you know i feel like people on this site will often tell younger queer people who are a bit too into identity politics and slur discourse and whatnot that they should just go out and meet real queer people or go to pride or whatever and the benefits of that are sort of implied- you’ll see that most of the stuff people say on the internet about queerness and queer discourse doesnt matter and thats all good and dandy and stuff. but i think its kind of unsure of how exactly? 

idk im moving to a new apartment and i was packing up my stuff, and i found one of my pride flags that i got last year at pride, and i’d bought it from an indigenous person who was selling like indigenous themed pride stuff in addition to the standard pride flags and bracelets and whatnot, and we wound up having a conversation about how difficult it is to change your name when you’re a more masc presenting person. they had a white sounding legal name and wanted to change it to something that better reflected their culture but struggled because they were masc presenting, even though the name they wanted to be their legal name was also pretty masculine sounding (to me at least, idk if it was in their culture). i’d shared that experience despite being a white person who was much younger than them, due to my more masculine appearance. 

the first drag show i went to, there was a section at the end after all the like professional performers went where people in the audience could come up and do a little on the fly costume, just for sillies. and there were two people (very femme presenting), one in a bi pride necklace, and they got engaged on stage. i dont remember a single person who wasn’t just overjoyed to see queer love in public.

it really doesnt matter about what your identity is, it’s that we’re all queer and we’re, for the most part, all that each other have. and honestly that’s the attitude that i’ve come to both about queerness en masse and as a political thing, but also for myself personally. i’m queer and that’s really all i have to say about that. not that it’s bad for other people to have more to say about their identities, i just think that its more important to focus on our similarities rather than our differences, and that this is one of the only paths to liberation for all of us. idk just some thoughts tm, stay safe everyone and make sure you’re hydrated/eating/taking your meds and all that <3

#thoughts tm #should i tag this as queer discourse #fuck it #queer discourse #queerness #queer #pride #identity politics #idrk if there's a point to this im just sorta getting my thouhgts out into the world #ceros posting

[variablejabberwocky]

Hi! The thought process behind why people think enby is childish is because it was intended to be the equivalent to girl and boy. Theres nonbinary, or just person, which can be used as equivalent to man and woman, but if you have a group of kids it sounds weird to say boys & girls & nonbinary people. Therefore: enby! It's not infantilizing in the same way as calling someone baby/toddler is, its uncomfortable to some people in the same way that some transmasc people want to be called man and not boy bc they want to be seen as an adult. Doesn't mean the word is bad, it just means it's not for everyone!

...can i get a source on that "it was intended to be the equivalent to girl and boy" bit?

cause this just sounds...incredibly goddamn stupid (not you, just that line of thought). shortening a term is a way to make it easier to use if its too long. and 'nonbinary' hits 4-5 syllables as-is. so making the short form some kind of different term with different connotations is just..."what the fuck were you thinking" levels of stupid

especially since outside of formal situations "girl" and "boy" are usually just ways to refer to "lady-people" and "dude-people" but like chill about it with little to no indication of age status

it also does NOT feel at all equivalent to how trans dudes sometimes dislike being referred to as boy because everything i've seen on that is wrapped up in how its VERY MUCH used by assholes with the age connotations of more formal language as a way of undermining the body autonomy and hm...social status (? not sure how to word what i'm going for here) of trans guys. its basically misogyny playing lip service to their actual gender and yeah, thats offensive as shit.

i do NOT see that with 'enby' and nonbinary people. just being nonbinary AT ALL gets you treated like a kid that doesn't know what they're talking about and is playing make-believe with gender. and i am suspicious as shit about the rise of 'enby' being treated as some kind of offensive equivalent to boy and girl because that shit was starting to spread around in circles right when transmeds/truscum were getting a hate campaign going against nonbinary people (and seemingly everyone was joining the bandwagon). specifically it REEKS of the same kind of "you can't use that term" bullshit that "queer is a slur" rose out of. which is just an attempt to get people to STOP USING THAT TERM AT ALL but hiding it in something 'passably' social-justicy so it doesn't sound like the bigoted bullshit it is.

basically i don't get why everyone else has to blacklist a term from their entire vocabulary forever (regardless of personal relevance) because a small minority of people either 1) are bigoted assholes trying to kill off a group (ideologically if no other way) but trying to be sneaky about it or 2) are unfortunate suckers who bought into the first group's bullshit out of ignorance/inexperience and never learned any different for whatever reason. (yes i am aware some people have trauma. its just not relevant here because the solution is the same:)

(general you here) you don't want to be called something? sure, fine. perfectly understandable. you don't want me to call myself (or my community of same identity people) something? FUCK RIGHT THE HELL OFF

#ask #queer shit #i was hoping it wasn't the same shit as always but looks like it might fucking be #do i want to tag this enbyphobia? #eh i'll wait on any potential source if there is one #edit: oooor it could be linguistic difference #which is something i'll have to keep in mind

[van-goghs-smoking-skull]

Some people on here REALLY need to think about what they say before they say it.

I saw a post today where someone said we should get rid of oppression and Antisemite! got fired back by someone who claims to be woke, to be progressive and fighting for the rights of the disabled, esp. those who are ND. Now as I recall from the history lessons given by my German teacher way back in high school (no, not a Nazi, but someone who hid in a toilet to keep from getting taken to a camp more than once), the Nazis preached that all the banks and politics were owned by Jews and the Jews oppressed the poor pure-blooded Germans. So if ending oppression is anti-Semitic, then that’s an awful lot like saying the Jews are oppressing everyone else, which is very much a part of Nazi ideology. That doesn’t sound terribly progressive to me.

I’ve also seen quite a bit of slur discourse in which the claim is only one (unspecified) term can be used in the queer community, as all those words are slurs and only the one reclaimed term can be used. What part of the process of reclaiming a word is confusing? The word is just a word, the slur is in how it’s used. Use it as a point of pride and drown out those who use it as a slur. So what does this mean? Only one word ever can be used because only one ever is allowed to be reclaimed? Again, very not progressive.

I’ve had people tell me that because I am half-Dutch by blood, eating burritos is actually me misappropriating Mexican culture. I’ve been told it doesn’t matter that I grew up in New Mexican culture, a blend of many cultures and heavy on Mexican culture, though Navajo culture is also a good part of it, that it doesn’t matter that I’ve never been to the Netherlands and that I don’t know much at all about Dutch culture. This especially reeks of the ‘Blood and Soil’ rhetoric the Nazis loved so much.

Maybe tone that Blood and Soil ‘Progressivism’ down and start reflecting on exactly what you’re saying. Emotions are fine to have, but they aren’t logic and they are not based on reason and should not be what you base your political ideologies on. Be angry about the bad things, but don’t slip into some weird space spouting off fascist talking points and thinking you’re the good person and everyone else is just a bigot, because that’s how you yourself become a bigot.

I keep saying it because I mean it. Learning to think critically is one of the most important things you can do. Spend less time pointing fingers and spend more working to make a better, less hateful world.

#politics #generally speaking #if your first thought in a reasonable discussion #with two different points of view being discussed #is to yell out a slur and not to come up with any reasonable points of your own #you are probably the asshole #simply yelling slurs and not having dicussion points of your own #is no different than what the annoying human tools of fascism do #being right makes a person right #claiming to be the only person with the right ideology does not make you right at all #prove your points and don't just scream insults

[unmeisenshi]

This is a bit of a warning here. There is a use of some homophobic slurs. I don't condone them at all, but I wanted to use them for impact. Reader discretion is advised.

After reassuring Solaris and making sure he was safe, Noel left Avett's clinic and met up with Audie. He was attempting to calm down a large group of Pokemon - consisting of both zealots that fought their way out of the local jail and regular citizens of Alstroemeria. The only thing separating them was some concrete barriers and Audie's own magics.

"Get back! All of you! Or there will be consequences!" Audie's throat had already sounded shot and hoarse. He had been yelling for quite some time at this point. "We are handling this cult! Please, return to your homes!"

Noel jogged over to the Espeon. "Listen to him! The rescue teams are handling the situation! You have nothing to fear!"

"We have everything to fear!" Someone from the crowd shouted. "You rescue teams can't help us! Who's to say your team isn't corrupt like the team in the news!!?? How can we trust you?"

The crowd began to push back. Audie and Noel had to call on some other rescue teams to help contain the crowd, a Charmeleon duo team and a pair of Machop joined in helping.

It was during this struggle that Audie began to hear things. Not just the shouting from the crowd, but the thoughts from everyone around him.

"These teams are hacks!"

"Curse that Espeon and his entire family!"

"We need to kill this faggot!"

"I'll cut that Lucario's head off with her own sword!"

Audie took several steps back, eventually resulting in him squatting and trying to plug his ears. The voices were incredibly loud, and becoming even more demeaning as time went on.

The Lucario looked behind her, and saw Audie squatting. "Audie! What's wrong?" She looked concerned, wondering what was going on with her teammate.

He didn't really respond, instead responding with an anguished cry. Tears began spattering on the ground, the thoughts that flooded his mind becoming increasingly loud.

"Let's hang all of them!"

"No team is trustworthy! Not even Team Destiny!"

"I'm going to rip the wings off of that Espeon!"

It was at this time that a small Eevee walked in between where Audie was squatting and where the teams were holding the rioters back. "Mom? Where are you? Mom!" The young pup was lost, and she looked to be on the verge of tears.

"Little one! Run! We can't-" Noel started, but she couldn't finish. The rioters busted through the barrier, and charged. The rescue team members were forced to move out of the way. The small Eevee, like a deer in headlights, froze solid in place and was eventually engulfed in the crowd. "Audie!" Noel shouted. "Move!"

But Audie couldn't even hear her. The voices in his head grew too loud. He didn't even realize he was screaming himself.

"Get that heretic! Crush him!"

"Bet that queer has a boyfriend! I'll kill them too!"

"We're going to execute every rescue team!"

The voices grew too much, and Audie's screaming had increased in volume. His eyes lit up blue, and in retaliation he thrust his hands forward. The entire group of rioters were flung backwards due to Audie's Psychic energy. The incredible energy was too much for the rioters, and most of them dropped unconscious because of it. Windows on nearby buildings shattered and glass stuck into Audie's skin, and the air around his hands distorted.

After some time, he stopped screaming and fell to his knees crying, and a deathly silence fell over the normally bustling capital. Noel walked over to Audie, and knelt down. "Audie... What happened?"

It took the Espeon a minute to respond. "I heard the voices... Of all of those rioters... They were saying awful things... That they were going to kill us... I-I don't..."

Noel brought Audie into a tight hug. "Shh... It's okay... Calm down..." She whispered. The Espeon was clinging tightly to Noel's kimono. When he eventually looked up, she noticed blood running down his nose and from his mouth. "Audie... You have blood on your nose and mouth..."

"Wh-What?" Audie wiped his mouth and nose, nearly gagging at the now noticeable taste and smell of blood. "I-Is everyone safe?"

Noel nodded. "We're okay. You take some time to compose yourself. We'll get these rioters squared away." The Lucario gave a light pat to Audie's shoulder and stood up, walking to the two teams and explaining the work they were about to do.

Audie sat in silence for a few moments, seeming to replay the words that he heard over and over again. He couldn't shake the words off. It chilled him to his core. Audie was aware enough to know that there was an Eevee in front of him at one point, and he looked around to find them.

And find them he did... In a bloody heap, unmoving on the ground. Audie tightly gripped his shorts. "Dammit... Dad... Why now...?" After a few more moments of silence, Audie stood up and walked back towards the team's home. Noel watched as he walked away, and was going to tell him to wait, but she saw a vicious aura around him, and decided against it.

She knew that when Audie was mad... He was furious. She had the help she needed, and with Alstroemeria secure for now she worked to get the rioters in jail.

#mirror of the world: noel #smells like teen spirit: audie #act iii: cult of personality

[watchingblsnowandforever]

My First Love

So 3 am realizations was not a myth. Good to know.

I don't know what my subconscious brain did that built up to this, but well, it's something I wish it doesn't do again. Knowing my brain, it probably will. Anyways.

Since my life revolves around bls right now, apparently, this is also related to a BL. Theory of Love.

I've watched many bls (some would say too many) in a relatively short span of time. I've enjoyed some, and I've still managed to not complete a few. I've laughed, I've gotten excited, happy, and gone through a bunch of other emotions, but I've never cried. Ever. I usually don't, when watching a movie or something.

But Theory of Love, the deceptive little thing, snuck under my skin. I cried twice while watching that series.

Later, I realized something. It was because I could relate to Third. I was crying for myself.

I've never really told anyone this, partly because I'm ashamed of it myself, but I did love someone, once. Not a crush, not puppy love, real love. Sounds crazy, doesn't it? Yeah, I know. But it's true. I not only changed myself for her but I suffered because of her and still didn't want to lose her.

Back then, I was a naive little thing, younger than almost everyone in my class, and the only one who didn't have a friend group. Naturally, i felt lonely. Then I met her, someone who willingly engaged in conversation with me, someone who made me happy, even if it was fleeting.

I was 11 then, I didn't know the true meaning of the words 'love' or 'crush'. I just knew my classmates talked about having crushes on boys and being in love with their boyfriends. I was a shielded child, and the only boys other than my father that I knew were my cousins. I didn't know what lesbian or gay or queer meant. I just knew my peers used lesbian like it was a slur, like the person being called that was very bad.

This girl, she ruined me for life. She came into my life not to be my friend, but to use me. She gave me depression and trust issues and crushed my already low self confidence like a tiny little bug. She ruined my entire middle school life for me.

She hurt me, both intentionally and not, just like Khai did to Third.

We had fights, who doesn't. But you don't usually hide your face in your pillow with a tear-streaked face and wish you never fought with her again. You sulk, you pout, you do katti.

Any time spent with her made me feel happy.

She bullied me into bunking a class and the Principal caught us. She got away without a scratch while my parents were called.

I hated her so much then. I hated that I couldn't hate her. I cried for a week straight, at night, my parents asleep beside me, unaware of what I was going through.

I still talked to her after that, can you believe it?

I used to love to look at her, loved holding her hand, loved talking to her. Makes me sound pathetic, no?

She made me realize that I wasn't straight; much, much later, when I was in depression because of the pandemic. She'd left school after class 8, and was but a distant memory in the dark corner of mind.

It was then that I realized she was my first love, and that she had ruined love for me.

#just venting about my dark past #love #first love #theory of love #theory of love the series #khaithird #thirdkhai #3 am realizations #because my brain likes to torture me