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swampysmiles · 2 years

Note

um hi can i ask for your thoughts on eridan ampora? :)

he's my everything and i love every version of him and everyone who enjoys him

I NEEDED TIME TO DO SOME THINKING BC I'M KINDA DRUNK BUT I'M BUZZING IN THE BRAIN BOUT THAT LIL FUCKER SO HERE WE GO FRIEND-

Yknow how you have those characters you can’t stop thinking about? No matter how hard you try? No matter how self-aware you claim to be regarding the comical levels of neurodivergence lent to character fixation? That’s me with Eridan Fucking Ampora. Ironic bc my first beloved was Kanaya but that’s another tangent entirely.

Pros

Massive potential for growth. Fandom resonance resulted in countless creative interpretations through which to view his potential for development despite the meager seeds provided in canon.

Dubious moral compass + ‘everyone thinks they’re the hero of their own story’ my beloveds

Thank god I wasn’t the only one all these years thinking “why tf he wearing Troll Gucci bowling shoes??” Spats? Babe I WISH THEY WERE

Skyhorse is just seahorse with creative mode toggled. I loved seahorses before I found Homestuck and it was kismet. I love them so much I love them I love them I love thh

Alien Drarry Potter but better and JK Rowling doesn’t make a fuckign cent

Ya know what? I LOVED his Pesterquest route! IN FACT I LOVED MOST OF THEM MORE THAN I THOUGHT I WOULD! It was all good fun and I honestly appreciated the narrative pivot in Eridan’s tunnel vision focus from “13 yr old fledgling nice guy incel caricature hitler jr” to a more believable angle and set of motives because someone had the bright idea to shift the lens away from lazy jokes to a modicum of believable, relatable depth, as a treat, anyway let’s talk about the hemospectrum bc that’s what I think will successfully get this train back on track so I can further mask my numerous vulnerabilities behind the guise of what I think I’m supposed to aspire to in order to avoid being systemically unalived which can never happen bc i am special except i’m not and i crave connection while my upbringing renders me virtually incapable of requesting it in a manner belying my emotional fragility

erisol / erikar / erisolkat / erifef / eriroxy / eriarafefsolkatwwhamallamadingdong

i just think he's neat (:

Cons

Limited canonical relevance

Arguably lazy utilization while understanding the Homestuck cast is historically unwieldy and Eridan was never meant to take center stage or anywhere close to it smdh

The wweh thing perpetuated in fandom which honestly doesn’t bother me more than an eye squiggly in my peripheral vision… and let’s be honest sometimes it’s kinda funny

Some peeps do this weird thing where they judge you based on your fave fictional characters but when has that ever stopped me

Summary

Eridan, to me, is one of those characters who has long evolved beyond his base purpose as short-lived canon fodder due to fans utilizing their creative third eye to see all the little threads of possibilities.

#the genocide complex NG+ is implied like anybody with sense knows what they getting into with this mess #oh no i can't remember what tags i use for asks AH WELL #HI FRIEND HOPE THIS SUFFICES AND IF NOT I PROBS GOT MORE #hyperfixation hurts the most when you can't figure out how to stop after a wholeass decade #saul goodman i'm just in my weird lil corner casually enjoying my weird lil interest

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into-the-loidverse · 1 year

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hey, I don't usually reach out to artists like this but I want to thank you for those culturally appropriate masa redesigns. I was a fan of his for a while and admittedly always found those designs he made to be extremely questionable (especially the GANESHA designs... if you have to TELL your audience what real-world God the character is supposed to be then you really messed up when designing them). Like you said, it goes to show that he did enough research to know what they were supposed to look like, but chose to go against it and hypersexualize the designs anyway because horny. Your redesigns proved that he not only could have done better from a cultural standpoint but that these characters would have still been beautiful even if they were wearing more than a yard of fabric lol. Masa has been doing this stuff for a VERY long time and I'm truly surprised that nobody said anything before. I really hope he learns something from this mess but from the way he's been reacting... well, I sort of doubt it. U dont have to respond to this, its just something i wanted to get off my chest, hope u have a good holiday mate

haha anon thank u so much !!!!!!!!!!!! i rly do appreciate this 😆😆💜💜 [long rant below oops soz anon]

oh yeah i definitely agree !!!! ive always had an issue and been pretty vocal [on insta] about his design choices in general bc…. this is a personal ick but i just hate hornybait art [esp from men] bc 90% of the time it looks uncanny that i dont understand how its hot…. this is especially seen in masas newer art - his clothing is vacuum sucked booby pocket that looks plasticky / nonsensical and the faces r just … yknow ? [doesnt help his woman anatomy hasnt improved much w the boobs being super high 2 the collarbone that it makes everything look off - and i always excused it bc i think it was when he drew the soap lagoon tribute image ? he said how he knows his artstyle is not how it was during onibi series and wishes 2 not return 2 it + the art is not the biggest priority over music which makes sense ! idk his art is always the best when not sexualised [or at least u cannot tell at 1st glance] like his avicii tribute / cappuccino pv or literally anything non human like guns / skulls etc]

edit: i just remembered the existence of patriot balalaika [hate that song sm as a russian immigrant] and i lied that song is the *best* researched song bc there is no sexualisation and it bases it true on the life of a war zone - WHICH FUCKING SUCKS that out of all songs it is that gets proper treatment .... what the fuck i get the dude likes military stuff but boooooooo so uninteresting [props 2 him removing the pv tho !]

im very happy that my redesigns served its purpose !! it was honestly quite easy after looking at multiple pictures + articles / blogs about said topic…. his la catrina is the best one only because it matched a cheap outfit i saw while researching so yknow thats something… his defence 4 ganesha also pretty much confirms what u said w hypersexualisation:

funny thing is during this whole situation i wrote an essay about fetishisation of women in comics 4 uni and he fits all the criteria of that so yay…. go cishet men 🥳🥳/s

i am so sorry anon 4 the long rant 😭😭 i too wish u a happy holiday !!!!!!!!!!!!! 🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳

#ask

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donttakeitsopersonal · 27 days

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Seeing internet drama like… match up or I suppose mirror the subplot of a webcomic I’m reading is so so fascinating. I mean it’s like drama that we’ve seen a bazillion times if you’ve spent enough time in the right circles but idk seeing it playing out too with real people got me thinking again.

Waffles under cut

Ima keep it vague even tho im an absolute nobody, knowing my luck, this will breach containment and then my unorthodox new ways of thinking will ruffle feathers haha but yeah.

Essentially the comic is about the aftermath of a murder and how people are living their lives after that. One of the accomplices is free and living their life and they’re also online. People find out and bully them, someone even suggested deleting their accounts and going offline for a while, but they don’t want to. One thing that is brought up with it is everyone keeps telling them they got to take accountability, which is true. But that’s got me asking well what does that look like? Like it can really look a lot of different ways but watching irl drama play out it makes me wonder if anything will ever be good enough for people. Like I’ve even seen this same scenario play out many times and there’s usually always a vocal group who just want the guilty party to be forever guilty. Is it good enough for them to take accountability, apologize, and rectify their behavior? (I’m talking low stakes drama here not like heinous abuse lol) it just really feels like if you ever make a tiny misstep online that’s your cross to bear forever. I feel like it’s very reductive and doesn’t allow the person to grow and change, which, isn’t that what we want? For people to grow and change and better themselves? Like idk man at this point in time if you can’t show me examples of someone doing XYZ shitty thing within the last year, like yknow something recent, I really couldn’t give a flying sideways fuck. If someone said “hey I did XYZ at this time and that was fucked and shitty and I’ve worked to change myself” and they haven’t done XYZ and did work to change themself, then idk man you sound incredibly immature and like you gotta mind your own business. Like it’s perfectly fine to be like “I don’t like this person they’re icky to me” that’s fucking fine you don’t need a good reason to not like people they can just give you general ick, water and oil don’t mix and you won’t like everyone you meet. You don’t have to be a bully tho 🙄🙄

OMG lemme waffle about other silly drama I saw that’s just like oh myfuckingod you do not need to and also hey wait a minute. So this one car influencer who is a very mean girl that’s also mean to other women while trying to present as a ✨Girl’s Girl✨™️ has had this, I shit yall not, YEARS beef with this other gal. So two face (that’s what ima call her lol) years ago, like BC(before covid) times TF was doing modeling and mechanic work, wow femme model on car soooo original /s 🙃so at this point in time she was actually a ✨Girl’s Girl✨™️, or at least pretended like it well enough lol, and was friends with some other blue collar girlies. She said she’d help them start their own OFs if they wanted and one took her up on that offer. Idk what happened exactly but TF started accusing said girl that she was copying her and taking her business. And like this was all so funny to me because like this just gave me DeviantArt sparkledog furry drama circa. 2007, like legit “yOu CaNt PaInT yOuR cAr PuRpLe!!11 YoU cOpIeD!!!!2!11!” Like bro this is straight up “you copied my design because you also have stripes on your tail” like day one internet shit, get with it girl. But also this is funny too because I seen her at that time basically copy someone else’s video like cmon. So anyways that basically made their friendship implode on itself and she has since then had a vengeance on this poor girl lol so here’s the nutty part, TF will constantly say “this girl is always copying everything I do, I saw her doing XYZ” which like is kinda inconspicuous when you hear it but then it’s like wait, you say you do not like this person, you try and avoid them, so on and w/e so it’s like wait,,, HOW do you know that??🤨unless you’re checking out her page and following what she does 👀 sussy. And like the other gal she’s cool and nice, we’ll call her GG, but I NEVER see her saying SHIT about TF unless TF did something like get her page flagged or something, which I feel is normal. And like mind yall this has been going on for over the span of years. So being an outside spectator to this all I seriously think TF is projecting onto GG, at least with the “oooh you stalking my page waaah” like girl idk you the only one posting videos about someone else 👀and also I feel like TF feels like I wanna say attacked but not really, maybe more like GG makes TF feel inadequate? But like I feel like seeing GG’s journey it’s what TF have strived for, like GG was a dealer mechanic, and now has her own shop with her mans and their friend. Like TF has only ever worked at like quick lube places and I think very very briefly at a custom shop or something. Like a month or less. And while I can say TF can perform the work, she is not what I would consider a high level mechanic. Like you just realistically have not seen that many cars, you’re not going to see the normal stuff that comes into places you’re not going to have that experience. Yeah working on your own stuff gives you skills a dealer or shop won’t but there’s far more you’ll learn in a shop, and I feel like deep down she knows that and feels threatened by it. Cause like girl why the hell else would you be paying so close attention to this game that you’d clown on her miscarrying like brruuuuuhhhhh you did not have tooooooooo 🥴🥴🥴that VIDEO could’ve stayed in the drafts😶 the fact she made a video too is big YIKES. But wow yeah it’s nutty asf, reality is stranger than fiction

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minimoefoe · 3 months

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thoughts while/after reading a court of wings and ruin for the first time

I sped through this book so I didn't really write much down as I was reading so these are thoughts after I read the first half and then once I finished the rest

first half, chapters 1-32

italics is stuff I've added after finishing the book

I love lucien so much I feel bad that feyre was using him for her schemes but also I love her liike she's so sneaky. even if it didn't work out as planned

'he's a different breed' made me laugh

so a faerie's mate being a human is a thing? that's weird/interesting/idk

ianthe die challenge (I won)

I was wondering why tf feyre's power was so low bc she's supposed to be strong as fuck. I was like um ?

lucien and feyre leaving together!! I kinda knew it was gonna happen bc in the recap vid of mist and fury that i watched she was like 'lucien would get on well with rhys' group wink wink' but also like, it was obvious anyways - elain is his mate, lucien has clearly been a bit iffy about the way tamlin has done things

made me sad that feyre wasn't just straight up like yeah lucien you should come with me like I get it but also :(

lucien and feyre travelling together for a bit was cool I love their dynamic a lot

lucien and nesta's first dinner with everyone is my fave like both of them slowly realising that the vibes are fun and being kinda surprised

amren being stuck teaching nesta is funny, I feel like they're a good duo

are we gonna get an eris is actually a good guy story bc I am here for it idk, I'm very intrigued

so everyone knows that cassian and nesta are mates right they just for whatever reason won't just say it? or is this vibe purely bc he broke his promise or whatever? surely not

azriel being all soft with elain is so cute wait. but also her and lucien would be cute too and idk UGH

nesta and elain had the potential to really irritate me but they haven't been too bad actually. I'm intrigued by whatever is going on with nesta. elain being a seer is a bit less fun bc that's not massively my vibe but it's fine. also I feel like the second she starting being cryptic like she was having visions it was kinda obvious she was some kind of psychic

it's almost comical how non-evil rhys is like wdym he has a library for abused women like okay sarah we get it he's actually very nice under that bad boy exterior

current ranking? lucien > amren > rhys > azriel > cassian > feyre > mor > nesta > elain

second half, chapter 33-end

I teared up way too many times and lowkey can't remember them all but this some - feyre being like that's why luciens mum loves him so much, them all holding hands before the final battle, the bone carver looking at freyre before dying, tamlin telling feyre to be happy, amren leaving

I wish lucien wasn't gone for like half the book

very mixed feelings about tamlin like fuck him fr he's clearly got Issues but also him being there to help and help bring rhys back was very sweet

and also I feel bad for tamlin but I struggle to feel THAT bad in terms of like am I supposed to care that feyre ruined the trust he had with his ppl bc I don't. also he was so twatty during the meeting like omg how embarrassing

kinda need to know more about eris idk like am I supposed to like him or not I still don't really know

tbh I thought lucien was just more tan than his brothers bc the spring court gets a bit more sun than the autumn one 😭

I was worried that all the battling going on in the book would bore the shit out of me but for the most part I was really into it

what is the deal with lucien, elain and azriel like is elain gonna say fuck the bond and get with az? I could be swayed to root for either one of them tbh. azriel seems to be better for her so far tho, like he knows how to be there for her

I stg after the last book I was like damn where are the gay ppl and this book was like HERE are the gay ppl. not that this is like rep central but yknow

kinda don't know how I feel about mor not telling at least azriel idk bc part of me is like if you just tell him and be open I'm sure it'll be a bit awkward (especailly since you waited 500 years to do it instead of telling him ages ago) at first but in the long run it'll be way better and maybe he'll even understand why it was hard for her to tell him. and also everyone else would obvs be supportive of her. but also maybe az is the weird one for not just getting the hint and leaving her alone like if it was gonna happen by now it would have happened and the fact he's soooo protective of her still, in a way that shows how he truly feels, is like okay bro maybe leave her alone

new ranking? rhys > lucien > azriel > cassian > feyre > mor > nesta > elain? idfk

there was a lot of names to remember and idk I defo got most of them down but some of them I'm like idk who you are I'm gonna be real. and miryam etc, I'm still not 100% clear on their story but honeslty it's fine, I understood it enough to not get too confused. I'll pay more attention if/when I reread

low-key feel like either rhys or amren (preferably amren) stayed gone like idk, both of them leaving/dying only to be brought back kinda takes something out of it I want STAKES sarah kill someone

#reading thoughts #a court of wings and ruin #acowar #i didnt mean to post this but anyways #edits may be made

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transsexualhamlet · 3 years

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pushing my shameless trans agenda onto liam

Hi i just think he’s transgender have you seen the man

Ok so obviously I’m not intending to say this is canon or ever will be canon i just think it would be Neat and i can fit it within canon since well we really can’t tell and there’s honestly a lot of things that fit with it :) also it’s just my favorite characters get hit with the transgenderification beam bc i say so

The whole argument is basically:

-the Name Situation

-his appearance and mannerisms

-his Past TM

-the Bond Situation

-and because I said so

But yeah so the main reason this came to mind is because of the whole deal with his name. I made a previous post on this but yeah, the thing about liam’s name is a big deal, and you know, as a trans person I see it and relate it to that.

The main thing is that there was no necessity to change his name. Louis never changed his first name, and there was no need to. And it’s never really gone over why william’s past life is so important to cover up, other than the fact that he did a court case where he threatened to cut a guy’s arm off when he was like eight, but that’s like... you know, that’s reasonable. He’s very very protective of his past identity, where louis kind of isn’t.

And the fact is, William isn’t an alias, he didn’t have to take that name, he isn’t just doing it out of necessity- he truly does identify with that name, proven in many ways. He enjoys nicknames derived from it. And the thing most indicative of this is Sherlock. In chapter 53, he goes wayyyy out of his comfort zone to actually reveal his past identity and his name. Sherlock knows it, the entire point is to reveal that to him, as a way of giving up the last and most important of his secrets. And yet, even then, William signs his letter ‘William James Moriarty’, though it’s supposed to be his innermost, most vulnerable self.

This pretty much says for sure it’s the name he wants to be called, the name he identifies with, and not whatever his name used to be. It’s important to him, and that’s not a front- have you read that fucking letter? If he was going to admit himself as anything else, it would be there.

Sherlock respects that as well- if there was ever a time when Sherlock would not call him liam, it would be in chapter 55. And yet the most important thing is that he still did call him Liam. He was accepting this dude even though he used to be something else, he didn’t care and he was still willing to save him and love him. Hmmm Sherlock allegory for Trans Ally lmao.

How the identity and name itself is treated also makes it seem even more a positive represetation of a deadname situation. They never tell us his name. And that’s like... honestly important. They’re going out of their way to say that his old name isn’t important. They’re not keeping it secret for any reason than to show that it doesn’t matter, that no matter what he used to be, William James Moriarty is what he is now.

Anyway, other than the name situation, there are still a lot of other factors that go into my thoughts about it.

A lot of his behaviors are indicative to it, especially when he is a kid there are moments where im just like “haha this is an allegory for transgenderism”.

Like first and foremost have you seen how this man looks as a kid? That is the most androgynous motherfucker you’ve ever laid eyes on. No one would honestly be able to tell, the way he looks as a kid is in no way disproving this- kind of the opposite, in fact.

are you honestly looking at this face and telling me rn you know that’s a cisgender boy?

And honestly, the fact that Albert lends him some of his old clothes just to go around outside in, and then when he comes back the butler is like Take Those Off Right Now Those Aren’t For You is like. Hm. That’s a gender thing. It’s obviously not the case but yknow, another allegory TM.

In his own orphanage as well, he basically took the ‘eldest daughter’ role to a T. He was doing all the chores, taking care of the children, teaching them things, actually managing all the finances as a Child, and kind of thanklessly getting handed this workload he took on bc, you know, eldest daughter. This role just isn’t really given to guys, no matter if they’re Smart TM? I feel like an amab person here would be given the oooh special gifted kid treatment but he’s not, they mostly just use him there as “free extra mom and 100% adult at 12″.

Another big thing is the entire situation around bond, who is literally a canon trans character. For this time period, the way the Moriartys handled the situation seems almost comically out of place. These dudes from the 1800s really just were like “oh yeah ofc you’re a man and we’ll fight anyone who says otherwise and facilitate you in any way possible”- they accepted it without even having to come to terms with the idea that it could be a thing. Bond clarifies constantly that it isn’t about him filling a role, that this is genuinely him, there’s no doubt about it. They clearly have run across it before, and it’s a significant and important issue to them that at least one of them has to have experienced firsthand. It literally just doesn’t make any sense otherwise.

Also in this situation I think it’s kind of funny that the one name they have on hand for the transgenders is James like come on you can do better than that

The parallels between him and Bond also make the whole situation really funny, especially with Sherlock bc it’s like wow sherlock i see you have a type and it’s blond trans men.

Plus, the man is overly secretive, he refuses to let anyone but Louis in his room and just generally doesn’t let people he doesn’t trust get close to him, obviously there are plenty of valid secrets he is keeping, it’s just another thing that points to it.

And I mean, honestly. Just look at the dude. Transgender trait: awful haircut. It’s the awful trans haircut you get from having a Gender Moment and going to a cis barber like “cut my hair short” and they give you karen hair. Somehow he owns it? But it’s an objectively terrible haircut.

My last point: because I said so. All my favorite characters get the transgenderification beam.

So you know, I refuse to believe he is cis until they decide we get to see him shirtless, come on anime team, don’t be cowards lmao

#rowan's hyperfixation essays #moriarty the patriot #yuukoku no moriarty

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tylerwritez · 3 years

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Hey guys its uhhh Saturday July 3rd 2021 9:53 a.m.

I literally got 1-2 hours of sleep •_• because I was up into the earliest hours of the morning talking to Jay and Ariel.

... Its homophobic that Jay was away /j :P and not in my room that night because... how do I say this without saying too much... he turns me on, simple. He's in LEDUC. DUDE. COME BACK I WANT TO FUCK YOU /HJ

I told him this before you guys, but my brain does this thing where it randomly sends me back to some memory and I have to live through the feelings yknow? And I twitch a bit. Well my brain has been sending me back to almost entirely memories of him now. And it's. Not even funny. My crush on him grows...

Oh well, I'm patient.

The forums last night were as usual, unhelpful. My dad looks at me as if I'm a tragedy, as if my skin is a crime scene, and we have a total of *drumroll* TWO COMMENTS! One of them was okay in helpfulness. They mostly just wanted to write about their tattoo cover up of their scars but. They were right about how you are the only person who gets to decide what you think about your scars.

If he thinks of me like that... doesnt mean I HAVE to think of my own self that same way.

So true.

Next person said maybe he doesnt think I'm damaged, maybe hes just gawking at the damage done to me?? And how he couldnt stop it?

And like isnt that the same thing honestly.

Oh hey, yeah I gotta tell you about TODAY. not yesterday or last night.

Well uhm I just woke up on my BEDFRAMELESS BED Cos they packed it and left me with the MATRESS xD (I wonder if this is their way of cockblocking me /j)

I got ready and uh I was told like, GET THE FUCK UP DUDE WE R GOING TO THE LAKE RIGHT FUCKING NOWWW

So I'm rushing 2 get ready... well not really rushing. I don't rush. I was getting ready. I go to brush my hair and theres NO BRUSH. ITS BEEN PACKED???? WHAT???

I did my best with what I had on hand and then we left

I'm in the car with my friend and annoying ass sister right now and I got music on

We got Tim Hortons (muffin + ice capp) for breakfast (already over my cal limit... •_• as if that's getting followed nowadays)

lol I dont usually eat breakfast tho so I'll try to skip lunch or have a light lunch, so it doesn't mess me up.

Right now as we are driving to the lake... it's mostly canola fields. Theres lots of canola grown where I'm from lol, just drive a little bit out and you'll see the fields and fields of bright yellow like millions of little highlighters sticking up from the grass. I cant make them out individually though... still waiting on those contact lenses.

Again, I'm patient.

I don't think we're super far out... I mean theres still lots of cars, signs, farms, roadside ads, trees, uh, shrubs, and if we WERE further out the land would be more bare... #grassland #praries #Alberta

Also the sun just makes everyhting look more alive.

Oh NOO IM DESCRIBING THE SCENERY... boring!

Idk. There isn't much to discuss, I'm just listening to music because I'm content with just that. If I come up with anything funny/Insightful(?) I'm gonna make a twitter draft.

10:17 a.m, signing off temporarily,

Judas/Jude Shepard.

4:25 p.m.

We got to the lake, talked, got ice cream, talked, went in the #water... lake stuff.

My friend was gushing over this guy and like... DILF. IF YOU SAW HIM... xD of course I'm just looking though. He just had big pecs which is attractive to me, and the overall build with these broad shoulders XD.

Tbh? I know me and Jay are TECHNICALLY not dating, but I feel like I'm dedicated to him. That's probably because of my crush on him but oh well.

I just keep thinking horny thoughts it's a plague within my brainnnnn and I know its his fault

I did end up asking him but by then he had already logged off so.... he'll respond soon and I gotta be ready. It appears that my mom is signing up for a Christian dating app... we'll see how that goes.

As for Jay's responding, I'll just tell him nevermind.

Anwyays we are headed back, possibly to the bookstore, possibly home.

I KNOW I talk a lot about the same things but that's because I'm infatuated with them.

I'm infatuated with... him.

I think of him in my mind and bam instant horny

I'll try to think of soemthing else,,, this is. Uh. Inconvenient right now.

I'll keep updating you though lol.

Hope I'm not annoying talking about Jay all the time.

I AM doing other stuff, I have a life. I just... I guess I unintentionally highlight certain parts a lot.

11:55 p.m.

IM EXHAUSTED GODDAMNIT MY DAD WAS MAD AT me...

... I wanted to ask to go to my friends house tommorowbut my dad is pissed at me for... closing my door??? dude omg hes like “what were you doing for two hours with the door closed” uhm reading? on my phone? jacking off? im a normal person lol. i said reading and on my phone which IS true and he said”sure...” all sarcastic WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO SAY?? YEAH I JACKED OFF???? stfu

hes not even mad at me hes mad cos my mom is goign on a date lolDONT TAKE IT OUT ON ME STFU

I'm dead.

So I didnt ask cos I was scared shitless lmaooo but I have an appointment anwyays so it works out.

I just read a bunch of this comic called outcast. That's it really. Now I'm gonna sleep after I post to twitter a bit...

ALSO I asked Jay finally about uh. Yeah. Scarring. and he said beauty is in the eye of the beholder. He said I was hot but then he said that on the other hand it feels weird when he runs his hands over them, but in general, he loves me.

So he said "I don't care if you have scars or not, you're still you"

I love him honestly hes so supportive.

I admit I'm a bit sad thinking they feel weird but honestly? Yeah. They do. I felt up my leg where the scars are to check and it feels like hard ribs/ridges to the touch of a hand but he still thinks I'm pretty so I'm not gonna let the scars get me down. Cos I'm still me. It's just scars. Doesn't affect anything.

:,)

Also erin found a hagstone!!!

Gn,

Jude Shepard

#JudeJournals #judejournals

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feferipeixes · 5 years

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Innocence Is Not Knowing That You’re Innocent (3/5)

Belle knows her brother pretty well. He likes comic books, he cheats at board games, and he wants more than anything to be human again. So, when he wakes up one morning with no memory of the fact that he’s a demon, she figures there’s no reason to remind him just yet. He deserves some time to just enjoy being Dipper, and not have to be Alcor.

Unfortunately, she can’t hide Dipper from the demon forever.

Chapter 3: Your Eyes Shine So Bright (link to chapter 1) (2)

Thanks as always to my awesome beta reader @toothpastecanyon!

Content warning: suicidal thoughts (or rather lack thereof) are briefly discussed.

(See the most updated version on AO3!)

===

“Hey, Dipper! Hey!”

Dipper kept walking, not seeming to hear his sister’s calls. He slunk through the crowd of students bustling about the entrance to the school, and slipped out the double doors in front. Belle frowned, and pushed through after him.

“Yo, DIP!” she hollered. “It’s me, your sister Belle, cmon I know you can hear me!”

Though he was at least 20 feet away, he seemed to shrink a bit. He lowered his head and sped up.

Alright, something was up. Belle hadn’t been born yesterday -- maybe she wasn’t quite as old as Dipper, but she’d still grown up with him and knew how to identify the signs of Sad Brother-itis. She just hoped that the issue wasn’t demonic in nature.

She took a deep breath, put a big smile on, and sprinted to catch up with him. She leapt into his path and yelled “SURPRISE!”

He flinched, and seemed to narrowly avoid falling over. She reached for his arm to help him balance, but he corrected his momentum quickly and swatted her away. This wasn’t entirely strange behavior for Dipper when he was grumpy, so she put it aside and readied herself for some cheering up. “What’s going -”

Her smile died when she got a good look at him. His face was a red and blotchy mess, still wet from the crying that he was clearly too embarrassed to admit he’d done, and she didn’t have to ask to see why. The skin around his left eye was swollen and bruised, and he seemed to wince every time he blinked.

Belle’s jaw dropped. “Oh my stars, Dipper, your eye!”

“Shhh!” he hissed. He grabbed her arm, looked both ways, and pulled her across the street, away from the other students milling about. “It’s not a big deal.”

“Yes it is!” she yelped. He shushed her again, but she kept going. “What happened? Who did this? Do you need your big sister to beat someone up for you?” She slid the bangles off her right arm and flexed her bicep dramatically. “Let me at ‘em -- no one messes with a Sterling and gets away from these guns!”

Dipper did not seem impressed. “Stop, you’re just going to make things worse!”

Belle frowned, and put her bangles back on. “Sorry, bro-bro, I just -- what happened? You can tell me, right?”

“Okay, but… Don’t tell anyone, alright? That includes Onika, Alistair, Mindy, and Dad.”

“Yeah, alright. Now tell me.”

“Well…” He looked at his feet again. “I took your advice. About… trying to make some new friends. So I talked to Jacen and Farah from Math club. You know them, right? They seemed nice, but they wouldn’t look me in the eye the whole time we were talking, and then they both said they had to leave and their excuses kinda sounded made up… Maybe I’m just paranoid.”

“You’re definitely paranoid, goober.” Belle poked him on the nose, and he scrunched his face up adorably. “That sucks though. And then you tripped, right?”

“No. A few of the football players came by, and…” Belle winced. “Yeah,” he finished, hand behind his head like he was trying to convince her that it was no big deal. As if he didn’t know that ship had already long sailed.

To his surprise, though, Belle smiled. “You know what this means? Time to come up with a payback plan! This’ll be fun, we can stop by the supermarket on the way home and get all the supplies we need, and if we do it at school then dad doesn’t have to know, and -”

“Belle, no, stop, this is serious. I’m having a really bad time right now and it feels like you’re not taking me seriously!”

Her grin slid back into a sickly grimace. “Okay, sure, this is bad. Y- you’re happy, though, right? In general?”

He threw his hands up. “What are you talking about? Of course I’m not happy! I failed a test, someone threw milk at me, and now I got beat up!”

She opened her mouth to try to respond, but it felt like her throat was shaking. Dipper didn’t notice this. He threw his notebook on the ground, and then grumbled:

“My life really sucks!”

Belle felt his words like a physical slap in the face. “But it’s better than the alternative, right?” she blurted.

He looked directly at her, and she gasped, because she could’ve sworn there was blue fire behind his eyes. “What alternative?” he asked, his voice slow and cold, sounding less like her dopey brother and more like something older and harsher.

She felt her heartbeat speed up, felt the thumping in her chest harder than the thoughts screaming in her head, and she couldn’t look away from the fire because this might be it, this might be the moment when it finally came back out. She wasn’t prepared to do this right now, she wasn’t prepared to comfort a sad demon who had been enjoying his humanity until his stupid sister opened her stupid mouth and accidentally poked him in the right direction torwards remembering.

Now she was sweating, and her throat felt tight. She was dimly aware of a voice hammering at her, but it sounded like it she was underwater, and all the thoughts and worries from the past couple of weeks were keeping her anchored at the bottom. Gradually, the pressure in her chest lightened, and the voice got clearer, until she could make out:

“Belle? Belle! Are you okay?”

She looked up -- when had she sat down? -- and saw her brother still looking at her. Whatever traces of Alcor she had seen a moment ago were gone -- now there was nothing but worry in his face. His face, which kept fading in and out, in and out…

“Belle, you’re hyperventilating, please…”

Oh, huh, she was. That was… a problem, right? The look on Dipper’s face certainly indicated so. She reached into her pocket and fished around -- aha! A fresh pack of gum. She stuffed a couple of sticks of it into her mouth and started chewing. As she did, her breathing started to slow down and her brain started to uncloud. She felt silly -- this kind of thing hadn’t happened to her in a while.

Which, she supposed, made sense. Alcor had promised to keep her safe.

As her breathing continued to stabilize, she felt Dipper sit down next to her. He pulled his knees up to his chest and sighed, long and dramatic.

“I’m sorry.”

She sniffed. “What are you sorry for?”

“I dunno. Acting so mopey lately?”

“Y-you’re allowed to not be happy.”

“I know, but…” He sighed. “I just don’t want you to think I’m going to do something extreme.”

She frowned. “Uh… what are you talking about?”

“Well, you know… You were talking about life being better than ‘the alternative’, and…” His voice kept getting quieter, and Belle had to lean in to hear him finish his statement. “I don’t want you to think that I want to die.”

She stared at him with a look of utter confusion. After a moment, he returned it. He opened his mouth to say something else, and then her brain finally parsed what he’d said.

“No, what?” she spluttered. “I wasn’t thinking -- I don’t think you -- wow, uh, no. Sorry to worry you, bro-ntasaurs. I know you want to live.” A thought drifted into her head, about a demon who long outlived his twin sister, and her voice wavered. “I don’t doubt it at all!”

He looked surprised, and then cleared his throat. “W-well, good. Because I do. Want to live, that is. Not doubt it. Ugh.” He leaned forward, resting his forehead on his palms. “This is so awkward.”

He looked at that moment more anxious and uncomfortable -- more human -- than he had since before Gravity Falls, and Belle couldn’t help but smile. In a weird way, it felt reassuring, that maybe he actually was getting the awkward human experience he so desired.

“I know, isn’t it great?” He looked up, confused, and she stuck her tongue out. “Want me to make it worse and tell you all about my current crushes?”

His lip quivered, and then he laughed. “Yeah, sure thing! Then I can talk about my favorite conspiracy theories!”

She joined in the laughter, and for a minute, all was good.

Then his face twisted, and again she saw something shimmer in his eyes.

“Wait a minute. If you didn’t think I wanted to… yknow… then what did you mean by ‘the alternative’?”

She froze. “I, uh, what?”

“When I was complaining about how much my life sucks. You said it was still better than the alternative. If the alternative wasn’t death, what was it?”

“Uhh, haha, I don’t, I don’t know, -”

“Because I’ve been thinking,” he cut in, “about why my life sucks, and I’ve… been coming up with some weird theories.”

Her eyes grew wide. “Oh, no, weird theories? That doesn’t sound like you at all!”

“Maybe I’m looking into things too far. But things have been really weird lately and I’m wondering if you’ve noticed it, and if maybe that’s why you thought…”

“Thought? I didn’t think anything at all!” She hopped up and balanced on the tips of her toes. “All I thought was that Dipper, my brother, my twinteresting siblocity, was a funny fellow who needed a smile on his face and a bunch of rhinestones embedded on his clothes.”

He looked shocked for a moment, and then scowled. “Nevermind.”

Her smile faltered, and she dropped her heels. “Wait, no, ahh, I- I didn’t mean to be dismissive. You can tell me.”

“Can I?” he asked, with a sarcastic bite that Belle had rarely heard him use before. “Can I really?”

“Of course you can!”

“It doesn’t feel like it. You’re always deflecting whenever anything strange happens, and you keep pulling people aside to talk to them so that I can’t hear! Do you think I haven’t noticed that?”

“I’m sorry... I didn’t mean…”

“Then why? What’s going on? I thought, yknow, twins, we’re going to stick together and trust each other and stuff. But now it feels like you don’t trust me for some reason and it kind of scares me. It makes me feel like there’s something wrong with me, and with all the other weird stuff going on lately, well…”

He trailed off, but Belle knew well enough to see where that line of thinking was leading. In one quick motion, she jumped up and wrapped him in a tight hug. He squeaked as the air was knocked out of him, but was prevented from crumpling to the ground by her vice-like grip.

“Dipper, I’m sorry.” She rubbed her face into his shoulder, trying to hide the tears that were coming out to play. “I trust you, I really honestly do, and I’m such a doofus for making you think I didn’t.”

“You’re not a doofus…”

“Yeah, I am!” she huffed. She detached herself from him, and slumped a bit. “Listen, bro-bro, I know I’ve been acting super weird, and yeah it’s about you. But I can’t tell you why, because that’ll ruin it.”

“But…”

“I know that’s a huge cop-out! But you gotta believe me, everything I’m doing is for you! I just want you to be happy and if I tell you what I’m doing it would ruin it. Please…” She grabbed his shoulders and looked directly into his eyes. He squirmed a bit under her gaze, but didn’t wrench himself away. “Please. Can you trust me on this?”

“Belle…”

“Look at me, Dipper! You really think I don’t trust you, or that I think there’s something wrong with you?”

He sighed, and then locked eyes with her. There was something shimmering, burning behind his, something grand and horrible, something loving and immeasurably ancient. It was so intense that her brain screamed at her to turn away, to not let herself fall victim to the monster in front of her, but that was a ridiculous, primal instinct. She didn’t stop trusting him when they found out he was really Alcor, and she wasn’t about to stop now. No, if there was anything she should be afraid of, it was the fact that she allowed herself to break his trust in her. So she kept her gaze, and after a moment, Dipper deflated.

“Okay. I trust you.”

She grinned, let go of his shoulders, and gave him another big hug. “Thanks, m’brony. It means a lot to me.”

He smiled weakly, and then picked up his backpack. “Should we… be getting home?”

“Oh yeah.” She put her own back on, and then grabbed her brother’s hand. “Let’s-a-go!”

“No skipping, please, I’m too tired,” he groaned, but light-heartedly.

“Oh, alright, party pooper.”

They headed toward home, unlocking hands after a few minutes (because “Belle I love you but holding your sister’s hand in public is mortifying”). Dipper didn’t seem to want to talk, so Belle loaded in a fresh couple of sticks of gum and set away chewing.

She tried to drown out her thoughts with the art of bubble blowing, but couldn’t help but play their conversation over and over again in her head. Truth be told, she still felt rather anxious after that close call -- she hadn’t expected him to trust her enough to stop asking questions, and the fact that she had doubted him made her feel… weird. Almost like she knew him less now that he didn’t know he was Alcor.

Because when she thought about it, he must’ve been missing memories of their friendship too, since him being a demon was inextricably tied to a bunch of their interactions. So it was kinda like she was talking to someone who she hadn’t known for two years. The whole act of keeping him in the dark about his true nature was suddenly leaving a bad taste in her mouth.

“Hey Belle?”

She snapped her head up, her brother’s voice breaking her out of her thoughts.

“I know you said you can’t tell me about this big secret now since it’ll ‘ruin everything’, but is it the kind of thing you’ll be able to tell me eventually?”

She opened her mouth to respond, quite forgetting that she was in the middle of blowing a bubble. The wad of gum, outweighed by the large air-filled bubble it was attached to, fell out of her mouth and landed on the ground.

“Oh, gross, why’d you do that?” Dipper moaned.

Belle stared at the gum, and then up at him. “Oh, uh, sorry.” She wrapped her hands around the bubble, which somehow hadn’t popped, and picked it up like a ceramic bowl. “And yeah. I’ll be able to tell you soon. Just not now.” She carefully stepped the bubble over to a nearby trash can, and dropped it in, where it again landed without popping.

“Okay. Thanks.”

Belle stared at the bulb of gum in the trash, and then shook her head. “Yeah, sure thing.” She skipped back over to him, and hooked her arm around his. “Is this better than holding hands?”

“Now I can’t tell if you’re deflecting or just being silly.”

“Why can’t it be both?”

He laughed, genuinely laughed, the smile unmistakable in his flame-less eyes. “Fair enough. But actually?” He unhooked his arm from hers, and grabbed her hand instead. “Maybe... this isn’t so bad either.”

(AO3 link)

#gravity falls #transcendence au #dipper pines #alcor the dreambender #belle sterling #dipper sterling #rrr #fic #long post

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tumblunni · 6 years

Text

MORE UPDATES ON THINGS WHAT HAPPEN

The half week milestone of the hospital house thingie time! I think the term they use for it is "a residential stay"? Cos like its not a hospital its a shared housing block thats just full of doctors. I get to sleep in a real bed and there's a nice community room and board game nights and stuff. But its still really scary how intense the supervision can be! Like they have a window to look into your room once per hour every hour constantly. And they have to go through your undies and catalog them as part of the possessions check. I was not warned about that and it was mega embarassing trying to explain a binder to a bunch of old lady doctors! Oh and i had yo do a urine test today which was possibly the most fuckin embarassing thing in the actual universe. And you're not even allowed to take your own pills! They keep them locked in a big ominous wall of lockers and you have to come into the office and swallow the pill while theyre watching. I guess maybe because some people might be faking their illness and selling their pills on the black market or whatever? But that literally doesnt happen with antidepressants, they have no 'high' or even any effect at all on non-sick people. So it just makes no sense to me and its real embarassing cos like i said i suck at taking pills with plain water and without a straw. The ones i take are real damn chunky things the size of my thumbnail! I think i'l get better at not (literally) choking under pressure over time, tho. Hopefully.

Anyway that's all the bad out of the way! Now the good and the neutral and the just miscellaneous!

Its still nervewracking having to shower in a shared house but they have a cool walk-in shower and ive never tried one of those so it was vaguely interesting. And im allowed to take my showers early at 6am to minimize the chance of anyone else trying to use the door, lol. My biggest fear is having some staff member walk in on me when im naked like back in that homeless hostel. Oh or that time in the homeless hostel where the teenage boys filled the entire bathroom with inflated condoms wall to wall. Like wow so much damn effort to prank the stupid nervous bunni who probably would have been embarassed by literally anything else. Man this place is bringing so many memories of that homeless hostel but at least this time its a place specifically for sick people and they know i'm anxious doing shared cooking and board games and whatever so they dont make fun of me for it. But in a lot of ways that hostel had more freedoms too.. *shrug*

Anyway! A good! I get to have cooking lesson!! I know literally nothing about cooking and now i get to know several thing!! This nice doctor called Josie taught me how to make an omelette and i tasted ham for the first time! That is just how limited my life experiences are, lol. Oh and they want me to say that she's a 'mental health worker' not a doctor, but its all real confusing?? Like they have the staff that look after you and then the only ones we're supposed to call doctors are the ones who actually have the authority to prescribe pills and diagnosies. But like if youre in a hospital you'd call them all doctors, not just the actual surgeon? Or i guess theyre kinda like nursing home staff?? But they cant be support workers cos support workers are specific government assigned inspector type guys like Richard who only meet with you once a week.and i have to remember to not call him a social worker either cos social workers only work with family and custody related stuff. I dunno?? Basically the medical industry has a lot of names that dont really describe what the actual thing is, lol. Anyway the ham omelette was great and now im gonna try and remember so i can try and make it myself next time! HAM ACCOMPLISHED

Also i played bingo with a few other patients and it was fun but funny that i lost 6 times in a row when there were only 3 of us. I got a consolation prize of a pack of neon highlighter pens so hell yeah!!

I'm getting booked in to try some additional classes starting next week on monday and tuesday morning. The computer programming one was sadly unavailable, but i managed tp snag a place in "confidence building group therapy" and "basic how to use power tools". I wasnt really all that interested in that one but i thought it would be a useful skill even if its less fun. And maybe you get to actyally make something to take home at the end? A lil shelf to help organize this awkward lil room better, maybe?

And an unexpected bonus of being semi-hospitalized is that i get a free bus pass! And cos im here cos of my social anxiety theyre gonna help me get outside more and actually use this thing to the fullest! The first thing we did was the trip to actually get the bus pass itself. It was like "bus, take my money to take me to the place where i can never give you money again!" XD Ive been really stupidly nervous about going on tne bus in my old neighbourhood cos MAN it was really isolated there and everything just amplified my mental illness. An almost two hour bus ride to get to ANY SHOPS AT ALL, with only one bus for the whole town so it was always crowded and full of screaming kids and gossipy everyones. Social anxiety: maximum level proud mode!

So yeah i feel BIG ACCONPLISHED! I was able to take this bus for the first time with a doctor coming with me. Power Grandpa The Strong. His actual name is Paul and he has awesome sleeve tattoos of like anchors and dragons and sports teams and stuff! And he likes thrift stores and wearing silly hats too! Its like he's powerful enough to wrestle away everyone's anxieties! I was able to be a bit reckless too and i went out wearing my fave shirt thats like trans pride coloured plaid. A POWERFUL SHIRT IS REQUIRED FOR THIS QUEST! so we went to the office to register this bus pass and i panicked a bit cos apparantky we brought the wrong form and i wrote my name in the wrong box and then my passport photo looked terrible and aaa! But it all worked out and i was kinda freaking out for nothing. And he took me for a lil tour of the place and showed me this cool shop that does spray paint tye dye t shirts with spiderman on them?? Why does this incredibly specific shop exist and how have i never heard of it before?? There was also a new harry potter shop next to the disney shop, and the old used book store i used to visit as a kid was still there, complete with rickety spiral staircase and ominous basement trap door. I'm still not brave enough to go down there, but apparantly its just the history books section so meh. Then we actually went to a fancy coffee shop and i had this brain freeze mango ice frappucchino thing! Im trying all the new foods!!

And i was TOO HIGH ON DECADENCE and made a RECKLESS CHOICE! i blame power gramp's amazing tattoos, they were totally whispering to me that i shoukd screw the rules and ride off into the sunset on a metaphorical harley davidsen of mental health

So i was like Hey Paul I Am Totally Fine Getting Home On My Own, and it was like i was floating off in the distance somewhere begging my body to not speaketh these words. But it ended up working out okay! The excitement of it all and the sense of accomplishmebt from getting there all okay allowed me to mostly not freak out as i spent the day in town and looked at some shops and stuff. Basic Living Skills: Completed! I chilled out in the library (tho i dont have a card yet, alas!) and visited like five comic and anime stores, and got lost but found a Pizza Hut and that was SO NOSTALGIC FOR MY CHILDHOOD and it didnt taste quite as good as i remembered but the waiter guy was super nice and had a similar shirt and it was All Good! Oh and i gave all my money to a homeless person and that's why i'm broke now. And i bought a plastic slug! I just saw it from across the room and was like OH NO I AM BEING MAGNETISED TOWARDS IT OH NO IT HAS ALREADY BEEN BOUGHT. I need to think of a name for this new friend!!

So yeh i got home okay and i felt really acconplished and that was the furthest trip away that i've taken in ages! Man my mental illness makes me feel pathetic, but it also brings ridiculously big joys from the smallest of silly acconplishys!

Oh and thank you so much to the people who sent me emails! It really helped so much to keep me from giving up during the first few days before i made a bit of progress and felt like i could really do this, yknow? Especially big thanks tp the friend who sent me that mysterious super happy song that they found on a mystery disc in a german market?? Im still not sure whether its in greek or hasidic jewish but it sounds AMAZING and i hope someday i can figure out the band so i can hear their other singles!

Ok this is bunni out! BIG HUGS FOR THE EVERYONE AAAA

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marshmallowgoop · 6 years

Note

Can I have a link to your posts gushing over the kill la kill dvd cover with Ryuko and Senketsu on it as well as your favorite ryuketsu posts please and thank you so much ryuketsu+gamako 4ever otps

I’ve actually written a few final-cover-gushing posts ^^;

Gushing

Sketches to Final, More

Final Cover Design: Life Fiber Synchronization Hug?

Sushio’s Drafted Final Cover Design

As for favorite Ryuketsu posts… that’s super difficult! There is so much good content out there; the archive on my other blog is really a treasure trove for fabulous work!

But I can try to pick out some faves! (These might not necessarily be Ryuketsu exactly, but they are all wonderful Ryuko and Senketsu pieces.)

If I’ve linked to your work here and you would not like to be on this list, please let me know and I’ll remove you immediately!

For favorite fanart pieces:

http://art-of-zirio.tumblr.com/post/77437562345/ryuko-hey-now-whats-with-that-face-i by @art-of-zirio

A really good human!Senketsu with amazing expression work.

http://bechnokid.tumblr.com/post/75424699297 by @bechnokid

I love the style of this, and it’s also 110% in character.

http://laminated-potato.tumblr.com/post/78911508364/spoilers-from-episode-21-here-i-am-again-with by @laminated-potato

Absolutely stellar comic-book style rendition of that bit right after Ryuko tears off Junketsu in episode 21 (which, imo, is one of the sweetest and most loving moments in the entire show).

https://www.tumblr.com/dashboard/blog/mossmallow-art/80650423246 by @mossmallow

A real cute piece of Senketsu as a party dress.

https://superdiduper.tumblr.com/post/89334412507/rrrrr by superdiduper

Really sweet pic of Ryuko and a wonderful humanoid Senketsu.

http://mochafish.tumblr.com/post/94258350363/unfinished-klk-comic-that-i-did-right-after-the by mochafish

A short post-series comic that is super heartbreaking and well done.

http://ayuseiart.tumblr.com/post/102786062721/always-in-my-dreams-senketsu-x-ryuko-matoi by @ayuseiart

One of the absolute cutest Ryuko and Senketsu pieces I’ve ever seen.

http://maliadoodles.tumblr.com/post/104315794432/this-anime-is-my-life-3-please-do-not-use-my by @maliadoodles

A real fun human!Senketsu, with some neat fashion for both him and Ryuko.

http://the-chokey.tumblr.com/post/92722492452/a-month-of-procrastinating-makes-me-appreciate by @the-chokey

Okay, so @the-chokey and @murasakidoku made this fantastic Kill la Kill AU back in the earlier days of the fandom, and the work put into it is phenomenal. This is just one piece of animation from the AU, where Ryuko and Senketsu kiss to synchronize (and I totally lost it when I first saw it). Incredible stuff!

http://fuckyeahryuketsu.tumblr.com/post/104611687073/godrobe-freshblood-actually-i-like-this by godrobe-freshblood

Godrobe-freshblood has since deleted and left Tumblr, but she’s done so much good work for this pair that definitely still deserves acknowledgment. This piece is a particularly heartbreaking one of Senketsu’s last moments.

http://theneonflower.tumblr.com/post/117521303222/a-promise-or-a-proposal-ill-wait-till-the-end by @theneonflower

@theneonflower has so much good Ryuketsu stuff! This piece is one of my faves; I just dig that Red String of Fate symbolism.

http://starcre8tor.tumblr.com/post/79730415930/kill-la-kill-sketch-request-dump-click-on-theby @starcre8tor

@starcre8tor‘s Kill la Kill stuff is so good! I love this top piece here of Ryuko signing “I love you” to Senketsu, and Senketsu’s adorable reaction.

http://fuckyeahryuketsu.tumblr.com/post/137453814400/secretmusician23-doodle-of-wedding-ryuko-3 by secretmusician23

Secretmusician23 has also since deleted and left Tumblr, but their work still definitely deserves acknowledgment. This piece is so evocative and beautiful (and I love it because it’s a wedding-dress Ryuko pic that doesn’t forget about and erase Senketsu!)

http://badlydrawnaikuro.tumblr.com/post/141973226943 by @badlydrawnaikuro

Senketsu and Ryuko and Loss. Need I say more? (It’s not supposed to mess me up like this!!!)

https://choco-maize.tumblr.com/post/141665868143/i-forgot-how-to-draw-side-view-bodies-frick-yknow by @choco-maize

Pictures of Ryuko and Senketsu hugging always get to me, and this one is no exception. Wonderful expression work and and colors.

http://fedorarapture.tumblr.com/post/168223415460/ryuketsu-fanart-in-2017-yeah-why-not by @fedorarapture

The style and coloring on this Ryuko and Senketsu hug pic is fantastic.

http://liqdra.tumblr.com/post/119813763533/3 by liqdra

Intimate, sweet, and beautifully detailed, this piece is breathtakingly gorgeous (note though that it might veer a bit into the nsfw side).

http://scribbly-z-raid.tumblr.com/post/71391583161/i-need-more-protective-senketsu-in-canon-trigger by @scribbly-z-raid

A Good comic that I wish would have happened in canon!

http://wife-fiber-matoi.tumblr.com/post/126200276503/phew-okay-thisll-be-the-beggining-of-a-ryuketsu by @wife-fiber-matoi

A lovely start to a post-series story that tugs on the heartstrings with just a few panels.

http://ggup23.tumblr.com/post/116046347022/mmhmm by ggup23

A super cute piece with such a good, in-character human!Senketsu.

http://bakemeats.tumblr.com/post/137063667214/also-here-are-some-sketches-sorry-world by @bakemeats

These sketches are adorable and in a really good style, and the humanoid Senketsu design is also fantastic.

https://sleepwalker-j.tumblr.com/post/164228736683 by @sleepwalker-j

I just love the colors and atmosphere of this Ryuko and human!Senketsu pic.

http://lovelettertofiction.tumblr.com/post/160102065197/in-german-carrying-and-wearing-are-the-same-words by @lovelettertofiction

A sweet pic with a Good humanoid Senketsu design.

http://lenandbonten.tumblr.com/post/128926389304/my-sis-and-i-finished-watching-kill-la-kill-a-few by @lenandbonten

Super sweet, traditional art piece with a great use of color. Back when Erica Mendez, Ryuko’s English VA, had a Tumblr (tsunderica), she reblogged this one, so you know it’s good!

For favorite official art/animator fanart pieces:

Akira Amemiya’s “Senketsu’s Date with Ryuko” (of course), and Mago’s art of the date, too

The final DVD/Blu-ray cover art, and the draft, by Sushio (also of course)

This piece of Ryuko smiling sweetly at Senketsu by Sachiko Yajima, from the Kill la Kill Starter Book

Sushio’s absolutely intense image of Ryuko after she tears off Junketsu (this is still one of the most loving and sweet moments on the show!)

Sushio’s illustration of Senketsu crying, which unfortunately didn’t make it into LOVE LOVE KLKL, but is still really cute

Sushio’s Scarfketsu turns, here and here

This old design of synchronized Senketsu (the far right on the fifth picture down), where Senketsu literally holds Ryuko

Mago’s super cute Blu-ray/DVD side art for the final volume, featuring Senketsu waving goodbye and Ryuko/Senketsu waving goodbye in Senketsu-Kisaragi

Ryo Akizuki’s (the artist for the official Kill la Kill manga) early drawings of Ryuko and Senketsu’s interactions

Senketsu as a fancy red dress (while Ryuko has extra red in her hair, implying that they synced to form the dress, aw!) and as a bikini, done by manga artist Ryo Akizuki

This key frame from episode 9 (“That positive outlook of yours is what I love about you, Senketsu!”)

For favorite GIFs/Graphics/Edits:

http://fuckyeahryuketsu.tumblr.com/post/82639712231/konohananosakuya-hime-senketsu-and-ryukos by konohananosakuya-hime

Konohananosakuya-hime has since deleted and left Tumblr, but this edit definitely deserves a look. It’s a beautiful collage of Ryuko and Senketsu’s growing bond.

http://lycanrockruff.tumblr.com/post/81015761133/life-fiber-synchronise-senketsu-kisaragi by @lycanrockruff

A super impressive GIF of Ryuko in Senketsu-Kisaragi.

https://fairytailwitch.tumblr.com/post/78811710462/kill-la-kill-episode-21-incomplete-i-have-to by @fairytailwitch

A really good, effective edit of that moment after Ryuko rips off Junketsu. (Have I mentioned yet that this is one of the sweetest and most loving moments of the show?)

http://softchoi.tumblr.com/post/107253257299/ryuko-loves-this-uniform-more-than-anything by @softchoi

This GIFset wonderfully emphasizes how protective Ryuko is over Senketsu. My heart.

http://asofterhonnouji.tumblr.com/post/119558607766/1064-my-body-is-a-temple-and-theres-another by @asofterhonnouji

This edit is so ouch.

For favorite fanfiction, here’s a list I’ve made before:

For general, in-series fics focused on Senketsu and Ryuko:

pulse by Noa (nothingbutcinders)

This is a short one, but oh so very sweet. It focuses on Senketsu’s love for Ryuko’s heartbeat.

Things to Remember by @felflowne

Ryuko and Senketsu being awkward about friendship. A cute story about dorky teens being dorky teens.

For A Crack, Some Plaster by plumeri4

A fic that explores Senketsu’s introduction some more. It’s a touchy subject, but something that definitely feels missing in the actual show.

For post-series:

Forever Sailor Fuku by @miracle-interrupter-heno

A funny and cute story that takes place after the series and doesn’t make Senketsu a humanoid. While that’s all good and fine, it’s nice to see fics like these, too.

AUs:

Vibrations by @murasakidoku

A really sweet story. Ryuko is deaf, but she can hear Senketsu’s voice, and can hear what he hears when they synchronize.

Senketsu Goes to School by @carrinth

While not a fic exactly, this comic is a hilarious and adorable high school AU with Senketsu as the main character.

And I don’t know where exactly to put this, but:

Dragon Blood by @inkblood-mistrieu

Really beautiful and poetic short piece with allusions to the Tanabata story.

Also, all of these authors have more stories and content about Senketsu and Ryuko. So if you like any of these, there’s more where that came from!

And I don’t know if you were looking for my favorite Ryuketsu posts that I’ve done, too, but I’ll self-plug, lol:

This long edit of my favorite Ryuko and Senketsu moments

This edit using a quote from Ami Koshimizu, Ryuko’s Japanese VA

This edit that makes the show material look like a video game, using one of the sweetest moments from the series (Senketsu loving Ryuko’s heartbeat)

This fanart which is like, the only thing I’ve drawn in the last fifty years

This fic which is honestly one of my favorites I’ve ever written for Kill la Kill (even if I’ve gotten the impression from others that it’s one of my weakest ^^;)

This meta about Ryuko and Senketsu’s communication

This post about how Ryuko and Senketsu are a Good Ship, Y’all (and the Spongebob one, too)

This meta post about why they’re good

Also, searching “Ryuketsu” on Twitter gives you a bunch of unrelated content and ship hate, so I’d recommend trying 鮮流 (Senryu) to find some good material there! The same goes for Pixiv!

I’m just scratching the surface here, but I hope this is a good starting list!

#Anonymous #kill la kill #ryuko matoi #senketsu #ryuketsu #replies #spoilers #klk spoilers

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bi-rezi · 6 years

Text

I Been Thinkin.... what would happen if feferiquest acutally, yknow, happened?

some thoughts + a complete walkthrough of everything that happened as soon as aranea got the ring of life + everything that WOULD happen if feferi replaced aranea

it’s Extremely Long. read at your own risk

cause okay here’s what happened:

- aranea got the ring of life, keeping gamzee as something of a servant

- she moved the golden battleship, alerting crockertier jane and grimbark jade to the strange circumstances

- she “healed” jake, forcing him into his full potential as a page of hope (allowing roxy to escape her dersian prison)

- jade tries (and fails) to zap jake’s hopesplosion away, so she switches the locations of derse and lofaf

- karkat alerts dave to the problem

- jade calls upon the power of the green sun to fight jake’s hopesplosion, but starts getting pushed through the surface of her own planet. eventually she loses the battle and skips across the surface of the lava lake that has now appeared, having been ko’ed

- aranea topples jade’s house onto her, killing her justly, but only thanks to a lucky 8r8k

- dave and rose start heading to lofaf

- jane goes to jade, intending to resurrect her, but is jumped by gamzee

- aranea reveals her knowledge of roxy’s presence. they speak briefly, and roxy tries to convince aranea to give her the ring so they can give it to callie before aranea knocks her out so she won’t meddle

- (callie and jade meet up and hang out and its very fun and sweet)

- dave arrives and sees all the Bull Shit thats going on

- brain ghost dirk (bgd) suddenly becomes Not Fake thanks to jake’s hopesplosion

- he begins to fight aranea just as terezi arrives to fight gamzee, leaving jane free resurrect jade BUT

- pm and bec noir arrive and take jade’s body. dave is there, freaking out. jane summons gcat to distract pm and bec noir, intending for them to drop her, but they... don’t. rip. dave chases after them to get jade’s body back

- bgd says “If I can’t get the ring off your finger, I’ll rip the soul out of your body” and it’s extremely metal and he starts ripping aranea’s soul out of her body

- this causes jake’s hopesplosion to dissipate, which causes bgd to start becoming Fake again

- rose takes the sleeping roxy out of the way. terezi continues to fight gamzee

- jane spears jake with her trident, killing him and ReFakening bgd completely. aranea’s soul gets back in her body all the way, also breaking her mind control of gamzee

- aranea knocks out jane, whose sleeping body (controlled by the tiaratop) begins to fight back anyway. meanwhile, gamzee starts to fight terezi now that he isn’t being mind-controlled

- jake resurrects from his death, which was neither just nor heroic. aranea starts to try to lift dirk’s sword so she can kill jane with it

- rose sees gamzee p much killing terezi and is like “fuck i hope this isn’t a blackrom thing... wait is it?” and like, he’s fucking killing her girl, get down there

- terezi and skaia fall into the lava just as karkat and kanaya finally arrive

- gamzee just manages to catch terezi, and it’s at this point that rose and jake (who are both jsut standing there useless) finally try to get involved

- battleship condescension arrives

- a6a6a3 happens

- [S] Game Over happens, which i’m also gonna break down:

- karkat rushes gamzee, who drops terezi, stabs karkat, and throws him into the lava

- aranea shoots bgd’s sword at jane, but jake jumps in front of her and is stabbed through the middle. meanwhile dave is fighting both pm and bec noir. aranea then stabs jane with the sword that still has jake impaled on it

- kanaya cuts gamzee in half

- the condesce fires her laser psionics all around, knocking terezi back onto solid ground and vaporizing kanaya. dave is double impaled by pm and bec noir (heroic). jake’s death is ruled heroic, and jane’s is ruled just.

- this is where people start throwing planets around. aranea grabs lolar and smashes the battleship condescension between lolar and lofaf. she then grabs locah, but the condesce retaliates by grabbing lohac and smashing it into locah

- rose rushes at the condesce, who stabs her with her 2x3dent. terezi rushes at aranea, who mind controls the former into stabbing herself with her own sword. the condesce aims her laser psionics at rose, but roxy void-ifies them both and saves rose at the last second. END OF [S] Game Over

- the condesce pops the ring of life off of aranea’s hand and breaks her neck, throwing her into the fire (a just death).

- john FINALLY zaps in w/ his retcon powers. he explores the destruction for a bit, meets dirk (who immediately Emo(tm)s at him and then dies via glitch consumption)

- john, rose, roxy and terezi all meet up on roxy’s planet and plan out the retcon and terezi has the most hardcore moment in the entire comic where she draws the outline of her own body on the ground moments before her death and then falls into it, finally dying

- rose dies and it’s heroic. forgot to mention that

- and of course roxy and john meet their denizens and all that shit and we discover that the jade who has been with callie has been the post-retcon jade this whole time

and okay. god this is a long post but like. assuming feferi gets her hands on the ring of life in a similar fashion. probably she couldn’t pull whatever strings the condesce did to get her mind control powers, but she might be able to make vriska do a couple things for her. but lets say she gets the ring of life and appears in the real world in the same place and at the same time as aranea did.

- honestly, feferi could potentially heal terezi’s eyes similar to how aranea did cause of her aspect. so even that would be the same.

- anyway. she could really get the ring from any alive person, and i don’t feel like tracking its progress through the people right now. whatever happens, she wakes up with whatever alive person she got the ring from and since she’s feferi, probably thanks them. maybe she says something like. fuckin.

FEFERI: I admit I don’t )(ave much to t)(ank you fis)( rig)(t now, but s)(orely t)(e reward of saving t)(e universe will suffice!

or something like that. you know how aranea had her dumb lines.

- she wouldn’t be able to move the golden battleship unless she had sollux or aradia with her, which is actually pretty plausible, since they were hanging out together last time we saw them iirc. maybe aradia was even how she got the ring. so, okay, say she has one of them move the golden battleship over to derse so she can awaken jake’s hopesplosion, and that alerts jane and jade that somefin’s not right.

- she probably doesn’t try to kiss jake? in terms of jake’s arc that made sense but in terms of hers it really doesn’t i don’t think. but she heals him and he hopesplodes and roxy escapes. jade does her thing, which tips karkat off that something’s wrong. she ends up getting ko’ed and causing some destruction.

- this is where feferi’s motivation actually starts to matter. lemme see what i remember lol. her thing is that she knows best, right? and like aranea realized, it would technically be for the greater good across the universes if lord english was never able to be created. so i think it makes sense for her to have almost the same motivation as aranea.

- in this case, i think feferi could be a lot more efficient than aranea was, and just use her witch of life powers to kill jade rather than inelegantly tipping a house onto her (again, thematically funny, but logically... lame).

- so jane would then go try to resurrect jade, but in this case it might be sollux or aradia who interrupts her. they probably wouldn’t go straight for fighting her, but jane might initiate that fight since she’s crockertier. let’s say it’s aradia, since she has a weapon, unlike sollux. she’s, like, slightly less op.

- as for roxy? i dont think any of them would be able to know where she is, since none of them are mind readers, seers, or light players. feferi technically inverts to a seer, but i don’t think she’s inverted, so we won’t count that. so she can actually stay invisible. maybe she meets up with rose and dave when they arrive.

- anyway, bgd becomes Not Fake and starts fighting feferi, who (unlike aranea) isn’t unarmed. i feel like feferi could totally take dirk, not gonna lie. so he probably gets his ass whooped for a bit.

- terezi arrives and i guess gamzee should too since the whole gang is here? i suppose he was on the golden ship? i dont like him. i dont want to have to track his whereabouts. terezi probably starts fighting him cause he’s a dick. unlike in canon, however, he’s not being mind-controlled, so he probably doesn’t sit there and take it.

- so dave is freaking out about jade and jane is trying to get to jade but aradia won’t let her and then pm and bec noir show up and take her body. jane summons gcat to distract them, but again, they don’t drop jade’s body. jane expresses her frustration, leading dave to chase them to get jade’s body.

- bgd gives up fighting feferi cause he’s getting his ass kicked and starts trying to rip her soul out of her body again, which makes the hopesplosion start dissipating, which makes him become Faker again

- jane spears jake, temporarily killing him and reFakening bgd. i guess instead of knocking jane out, she’d just straight up Regular Fight her. that’s another fight i think feferi could win, not gonna lie. jane’s badass but feferi toted whales around on the daily when she was alive. jake resurrects while they’re fighting.

- rose sees gamzee p much killing terezi and is like “fuck i hope this isn’t a blackrom thing... wait is it?” and like, he’s fucking killing her girl, get down there

- terezi and skaia fall into the lava just as karkat and kanaya finally arrive

- gamzee just manages to catch terezi, and it’s at this point that rose and jake finally try to get involved

- battleship condescension arrives

([S] Game Over)

- karkat rushes gamzee, who drops terezi, stabs karkat, and throws him into the lava

- let’s say feferi is winning against jane. jake intercepts the killing blow, inconveniently, and dies. she kills jane with the other end of her 2x3dent.

- kanaya cuts gamzee in half

- in canon, this is where planets get thrown around. that could technically happen now too, actually, since feferi has sollux on her side, but it could also, like... not. instead sollux could just like directly attack battleship condescension and i feel like that’d be more efficient. maybe the condesce chucks a planet at them out of spite? but idk, i felt like that was kind of far-fetched in canon anyway, like there were people on lofaf who apparently survived the planet they were on getting hit by another planet? i call bs. nah condy probably just fires at them with her laser psionics like sollux did. its not as Dramatique(tm) but it’s also, like... less dumb

- rose rushes at the condesce, who stabs her with her 2x3dent. terezi attacks feferi, deciding that this has gone on far enough, but is quickly knocked aside and stabbed with feferi’s 2x3dent. the condesce aims her laser psionics at rose, but roxy void-ifies them both and saves rose at the last second. END OF [S] Game Over

- now it’s just condy and feferi, and i think this can be a bit of a longer fight, especially since feferi still has aradia and sollux on her side (or maybe even jsut one of them? maybe she got aradia to come with but sollux couldn’t since he’s kind of dead kind of alive). but i think the condesce can still win this fight, which leaves us with a dying rose, a dying terezi, a live roxy, and john who’s about to pop in (and dirk who’s still across the incipisphere)

and then the retcon can happen and we didnt have to have 12 extra unnecessary characters, only two of which actually got any decent development in canon, despite the fact that BOTH of them couldve been replaced with feferi

(meenah couldve been replaced with an alt feferi who god-tiered and maybe even successfully created a new world before her timeline died. like. really easily.)

as long an endeavor as feferiquest would be, replacing this section of canon with feferiquest would actually make homestuck shorter, since we could almost completely remove the whole dancestor section

#txt #feferiquest #hs #feferi peixes

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crystu-cii · 3 years

Note

Thank you!! I had a lot of schoolwork so that's why I was so busy(cough and I definitely did all of it and didn't leave any of it for today since I stayed up til five am being productive, most definitely. Yep.) 💕💕

Moodd-- XDD

Oh wow-- okay but that reminds me of something- I've heard of adults taking on a "worksona" to get things done so you?? Basically did that?? You took on a persona that caused people to take you more seriously! I don't think it's cringey at all, it's actually super cool!! Especially taking on the attitude/mindset of a character? That's so interesting and neat!!

See that's ALSO cool, and evidence of it having a desired effect :3c

OOOOH-- me too tbh- or like a video game protag? But if I were a video game or anime protag, I'd better have or recieve animal ears XDD MAKE IT FUN AT LEAST XD

OMS XDD That's p h e n o m e n a l -

!!! ;w; aww I see what you mean- damn you're getting rhcb on your dash? Why am I not getting rhcb?? XD NOOO YOUR BLOG ISNT BORING-- I love it with all my heart and I think it's great, and even though breakfast seemed a little long that's cause transitioning is difficult and stuff, so that's okay :3

WAIT THAT'S SO SMART CRYS.... YOURE SO SMART WH??? YOUR INTELLIGENCE CLEARLY SURPASSES MINE-- XDD

Ahhh I wish I had an au ;w; but I d o n t, and I definitely don't have an ellie-centered one ;w; I really want to make an ask blog I'm just like- ah- no thoughts, head empty-

Also dw advice is g r e a t l y appreciated!! ✨💖💕💞❤️

omg same- i have a crap ton of work that i can literally do NOW and get it over with but im like "NAHHHHHHH" xD but i at least did some work of it- even tho im sure its not even good but its my teacher's fault for saying "something is better than nothing" a whole dam lot XDD

and ohHHH that might be what it is- yeah ! thinking back on it i also do find it hella cool- i was able to be the teacher's pet for some of my classes xD- but then if any of my classmates see me during lunch time i would be here loud ASFFF and also saying the weirdest nonsense ever- omg i can ramble about how cool school was WITHOUT the work yknow? like all the events- friends- and ALL that is awesome xDD and also thanks for thinking its neat! i kinda had fun messing around with people- god i feel kinda mean- XDDD

and HELL YEAH GIVE ME ANIMAL EARS GOD-- XDD omg whats funny is that i am in LOVEE with animal headbands- headbands are literally my comfort item at this point- when i go outside without one- i just dont feel the same xD one time at christmas my bro gave me a cat headband that has switch so it lights up- and i was OBSESSSED with it that i wore it literally everyday at school- and OMG YKNOW WHATS FUNNY: thats how people know who i am- because of my headbands- which is actually convenient cause NO ONE KNOWS MY NAME- like they would know me as a smart girl but they would have no clue who tf i am (because i am soooo not social in school xD)

and cause i wear the same headband everyday- people have kinda known me for it- and kinda just started calling me "cat girl" or "cat ears" or SMTH along with cat in it- it was funny XDD but also my brain tells me "people call you this because thats what happens when you dont have many friends-" and im like "yeAh i KNOW-" xD but after like a semester i stopped wearing the cat headband cause got new headbands! they are like pom poms! i had white ones and the other headband is black ones- i switch between them usually to match my outfit or how im feeling today xD

and AS YOU KNOW IT- i got crazy nicknames- and little did i know it WAS WAYY FUNNIER than with the cat headband- omg- i can list you all the things i remember:

"snowballs" "fuzzy ears" "white/black fuzz" "RABBIT TAIL EARS-" (THAT one was what my teacher called me before knowing my name and my friend witnessed it- in fact i got the audio recorded xD) and also names something along the line of "bear ears" or smth- gosh it went wild- i felt popular xD i would also have friends that would softly bap on of my pom poms just for the sake of messing with me- xDDD

but anyways- with rhcb OH BOY OH BOY- YOU SHOULD SEE THE HENRY STICKMIN CHARACTER TAGS ON INSTAGRAM- the cat ears on characters was WIILLLDDD- there were also so many neko reginalds and shit it was crazy but awesome xDDD

and yeah the breakfast arc i felt like it was the oppurtunity for the triple threat themselves to answer lotta questions- kinda a filler arc- but thank GOD the questions i got now were just boring- or it would be better for the toppats to answer- youd never know! and yknow what- ill just say it now- yknow how henry doesnt know all that much of stickcats? yeah- but guess what- reginald knows a whole lot more ( or well- supposed to) so i wished the people viewed it as reginald the master of knowing stickcats- i even thought of a spinoff comic series where when someone asks a good question about stickcats- it would trigger a class lesson as a jokey concept XDD with sensei reggie! BAHHAA sadly i think i, as the mod, already answered a lot of those questions- so sadly it might not become a thing xD

and YESSS I FELT BIG BRAIN FOR IT- and i think sending myself questions was what made the blog spread easily- cause when you make a blog- its going to be hard for someone to ask you questions first- especially since your post will takes days til it finally shows up on the tags- so may as well make your own questions! at first- i created the blog on my phone- and sadly on my phone it wouldnt let me ask my own blog( but i didnt know you CAN send yourself asks just by going on a computer or laptop- xD) so i yelled at two of my friends like "HRYHEYEHYEHEY THIS IS SOO OUT OF CONTEXT BUT CAN YOU GO ON TUMBLR FOR ME-" XDD and those two friends were the first asks of the whole blog! when henry woke up! (this is all- what i call- a pro gamer move-- /hj XDD)

and awhhh- i feel that- i literally also have the power to make an very suspenseful story with an interesting au- but what i decide to do? "HEY- WHAT IF WE ADD CAT EARS AND TAILS ON STICKFIGURES- " and what i tell myself? "OH- GENIUS- gonna start a whole ass blog-" XDDD but ALL of my AUs are just comfort AUs- i wrote stories of three of them(if you count the stickcat au) while the rest i just daydream- xD i could list them in the next post if you are somehow interested XDD

and thank gosh! i hope what i say would be considered advice- even though im just stating what i do and all xD but thank you!!! 💞💞❤️😭❤️❤️😭💞

#the rambles of crystu #WOOO long post long post :OO

0 notes

swyllh · 6 years

Text

svt vocal team: radio host scenarios

radio host au – vocal team edition!

where you’re either a) called in as a temporary replacement, or b) are a permanent host for a late night show.

seungkwan:

buCKLE UP BUDDIES

ok so, the radio show is split into different shifts – day and night shifts, mainly

you take the night shift, because you’re an incorrigible night owl

and because you love chillhop, acoustics. it’s like a match made in heaven, you and night shifts.

you know there’s a radio host, a very popular radio host, for the morning shift – he’s your exact counterpart in that he’s perfect for the morning call: bubbly, loves singing, has a lovely cheerful voice… the list goes on

but because you’re always on the night shift, and you’re always sleeping in, you don’t get to meet this guy, much less listen to his shows.

so you’re like /shrug/

but inside you’re really curious, because… well, you’re always by yourself recording (since you know how to operate almost everything on your own, and all your friends are losers who need their 9 hours of rest)

this one time, however…

you find yourself stuck in the studio patching up some things way after your shift

there was an emotionally attached caller who took up one hour, the sound system went down a bit and you had to fix it while keeping the listeners entertained…

things dragged on until it was, like, five in the morning.

you’re ready to drag your ass off to bed, when the morning radio host enters with a steaming cup of coffee and a bright smile

he doesn’t expect to see you there – usually the studio just runs on autoplay between the hours of 3am – 5.30am

“hey…” “hey, sorry, but i’ve been here since 8pm last night and i need to sleep bye” is what you say before you just collapse on the sofa in the next room.

seungkwan is obviously at a loss but!! he’s also been curious about the night host

when you wake up, seungkwan’s in the recording room working his charm

in fact, you wake up to the sound of his singing. nice, non-belty singing.

there’s a cup of coffee on the table next to you, and it just says “for the overworked night host !! :D”

you thank your past life and good karma and everything and drink the coffee.

“hey, i’m seungkwan, the morning host. it’s nice to meet you for the first time!” he says when he leaves the studio on autoplay.

you laugh and introduce yourself too. but you have classes and you need to change, so the exchange is pretty short.

but! you do leave notes at the recording station for each other after that haha

one time you laugh out loud at the sight of what he’s left for you, and explain to the listeners the whole deal between you and seungkwan

someone demands a collab

a few, ten, maybe fifty people support the idea

so you and seungkwan end up doing an evening special and by the end of it it’s like the best idea ever because he’s so funny??? what???

the notes never stop coming, man

jeonghan:

i don’t think he listens much to radio shows, much less late night ones, but he does tune in this one time

and you’re in the middle of giving out some advice

it could be anything, literally, like how many seconds to politely laugh at a bad joke

but you’re saying it so gently and soothingly that he actually listens

“so yes, i would think that the bare minimum would be two or three ‘ha’s, just so you can make a quick transition. remember to keep smiling for a second or two after the other person stops speaking, and then you can move on from there! :)”

how do you even enunciate a smiley face

he doesn’t know

but you do :)

and he finds it kind of funny and calming so!! he continues tuning in!

m a y b e once he actually calls

“so, um what do you think about brainwashing people for their love?”

and you’re just O.o but you’re cool

not the weirdest question you’ve heard

(just before his call you got one asking you about how to deal with being robbed of your remote control)

so you talk about it with him on the radio, and he’s enamoured!

what a nice voice! what an understanding character!

“don’t you think we should make sure our loved ones know that they’re loved?” “yes, mr yoon, but brainwashing…”

calls regularly after that, if only to brainwash you into being his dearest radio host

“and whose radio host are you, [y/n]?” “… i’m not saying that on broadcast, buddy” “oHOhOHoho so you’ll say it off broadcast?”

literally you slam your head into the desk

“WHACK” “… [y/n], are you okay?”

your listeners are tired of your banter man (they love it though)

joshua:

ok so the thing is, you’ve just been called in to do this as a favour

you are in n o w a y a professional

p sure you flunked public speaking class one time because you were laughing too hard at your own joke

so when you’re doing this show, you’re just uttering disclaimers

“so let’s talk about the newly minted water cooler at the admin block… that is, if it’s a relevant topic. is it relevant? shit, i don’t know. shit, i’m not supposed to curse on the show. shit i did it. shit i did it again.”

it’s kind of a trainwreck

you’re kind of like, if comic sans could talk… yeah.

so when the show ends – you’re in the midst of talking about the conspiracy theory between the moon landing and that ‘that boi’ meme

the end-card (?) song plays and your mic is switched off mid-sentence

josh can’t believe he just sat there and listened through this trainwreck

but he did

(and maybe he’s partially convinced of your theory)

he tunes in the next time, same time, same day, but you’re not there

he’s not sure why he’s disappointed, but at least he’ll get his regularly scheduled content of actual campus news

surprisingly you get called in again – and he’s tuned in

“back by popular demand!” you end up yelling, and his eardrums haven’t been quite the same since.

“ok, no, but seriously, some of you guys wanted me back? haha”

so maaaaybe he might have actually called in to ask about you

and you know about that, so after that broadcast, you get his number from the regular host, and start exchanging conspiracy theories lol

jihoon: (happy birthday!)

ok so this one is a bit different.

because he’s a music producer, and he’s trying to get his work out there

testing the waters, yknow

and you’re part of the campus radio team, so he arranges to meet up with you

not before marathoning your podcasts so he can um strategically win you over to play his music? i mean, pssh, have you heard the stuff he mixes? he doesn’t need that, but it’s better to know who you’re working with anyway

so he listens, and you’ve got this inviting, friendly voice that really makes people feel like they’re having a conversation with you

SO he marathons, and finds that you’re a pretty chill person and open minded

nice

when you two meet, he’s just finishing up his remix in the café

you walk in, and see him hard at work! wow, what a man

“hey, it’s [y/n] from the campus connection. you must be jihoon?”

turns out, wow, who’d have expected it, you can tell he’s got talent. it’s good. like, really, really good

so you sell his deal to the overall producer of your radio team. works well, the show ratings are hitting an all-time high

and you guys decide to do a mini-interview

“think of the ratings,” your overall producer whispers, hunched over a plan to monetise this tiny radio show

“hello everyone! it’s [y/n] here, and guess who i have with me today? it’s lee jihoon, the producer behind the music you’ve been listening to!”

“so, jihoon, tell us more about yourself!”

his first impression of you was right – is right – you’re really easy to talk to, and the session goes by quite comfortably

he doesn’t even realise time’s up until your overall producer is literally banging on the door and mouthing “out”

“that was really fun, jihoon, thank you!” “nah, it was really easy to talk to you”

do you guys hang out and he brings you more compositions to evaluate?

seokmin:

okay, this time seokmin is the one calling you in for help

one of his friends (this guy has a ton of friends, don’t even.) mans the radio show, and is in need of a replacement for the night shift

“why don’t you help him out, seokmin?” “have you heard me speak?” “uhuh” “it’s the night show, [y/n]. i’m going to wake people up” “…so you’re saying that i make people want to sleep?” “uhhhhhhhhhhhh no?”

but you help him out anyway – that guy is impossible to refuse

so! seokmin accompanies you to the studio, and he’s just there for moral support because it can be scary doing a radio show for two hours or so

“um, hi, everyone, this is [y/n] and i’m filling in for the regular host!” /muffled whispering in the background

everyone. can hear. seokmin. being encouraging. in the background.

at first, it’s kind of sweet?

but like, after the fiftieth thumbs up you’re just like

“ok seokmin, how about you join us in the recording”

“whaaaa- nooooooooooooo hi everyone, i’m seokmin hahaha”

he is a good night show host, despite what he says

he’s funny, and his sense of humour can be pretty chill when he wills it to. it takes a bit of effort, though, because at first he’s really loud

“so, seokmin, tell us more about that time with the-” “we dON’T SPEAK OF-” “shhhhh”

but yeah, night shift is so fun with him, you forget about the thermos of coffee you brought to keep you awake.

eventually the two of you do get into a somewhat philosophical discussion

“how did we get from cabbages to being happy?” “uh”

and even though he’s pretty happy-go-lucky and always sparkling with happiness, you guys exchange views and you find that it’s not always the case

i mean, duh, but still

“but i think it’s best to try and be happy, yknow” “…yeah, it is”

it’s a pretty meaningful conversation, and part of you is in shock that this didn’t happen in more private circumstances, but that there are at least fifty people listening in haha

you do get to know him a bit better after this, though

and he treats you to coffee the next day for your efforts, so it’s all worth it!

#svt scenarios #svt imagines #vocal team #vocal team imagines #vocal team scenarios #seventeen #seungkwan imagines #jeonghan imagines #jisoo imagines #joshua imagines #jihoon imagines #woozi imagines #seokmin imagines #dokyeom imagines #how ham do i go on these tags #radio host

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adelaide-ill-omens · 7 years

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Some Anon Submission Re: Problematic Fiction

“Even ignoring how much info there is out there that notes the effects of media normalizing attitudes towards things…” That’s just it. There ISN’T any info out there drawing clear cause and effect. There’s no evidence of so-called “romanticizing” having a clear negative effect on reality. But what does exist is evidence that fictional depictions of bad situations help victims identify those situations IRL, and that fictional depictions of those situations can help victims process trauma. Evidence solid enough that mental health professionals direct their patients to read these kinds of fiction as part of recovery. And who exactly is doing all this supposed normalizing? Some random person online writing fanfic is somehow going to change the entire world? If some media WAS going to have a big impact, it would be media from major franchises or published authors. But antis and the other people doing callouts don’t go after major targets, just random fans online. Why? Because the people doing callouts care more about finding vulnerable people to hurt than actually helping anyone. Likewise your comment about “frequent posts of csa survivors calling y'all out”. Most of the people doing callouts are trying to feel better by taking out their hurt on vulnerable people. If they were really trying to help anyone, they wouldn’t be attacking other CSA survivors who dare to disagree with them or are survivors “wrong”.

This reads like an old strawman of this argument.

To start, there is. As back and forth as the arguments go there’s no doubt there’s a link between consuming pedophilic media and pedophilic behavior. As for unclear, kinda. I can see an argument that reason they’re linked is that behavior leads to consuming related media, but that’s not exactly an argument that helps pedophilic media any. A quick Google search just to make sure I wasn’t talking out my ass helped. And no evidence of romanticizing having a clear effect on reality? Like, my dude, have you browsed the site you’re posting on? The amount of posts, big ones that gets big callouts, with a person romanticizing that and start romanticizing it out of fiction? Shit the amount of times people here romanticize anything in fiction and then go on to do so out of fiction. And that’s before opening up fucking proquest or something to look studies regarding this.

Yeah depictions of bad situations help identify those in real life. Someone sees a situation in fiction presented as bad and recognizes it’s bad in real life. Funny, sounds like what I’m arguing. It’s almost like I’m not saying “people shouldn’t ever show harmful relationships,” but that I’m saying “people shouldn’t defend these relationships and present them as positive.” There’s a difference between writing a relationship between a 12 and 27 year old that shows it as harmful, manipulative, and inherently abusive, and presenting the same relationship as ending happily for…some reason. Bad situations help identify those in real life as bad when they’re depicted as bad. To continually connect to the original topic of shipping, when people ship a couple like that, write fiction of it and look for more of it to read, one has to wonder if it’s to see it positively or negatively.

Mental health professionals actually recommend reading child porn to cope with childhood abuse? That sounds…a bit ludicrous. But yknow what? I’m not a csa survivor, so maybe that’s a thing. Those that I know I haven’t pried and asked about that. I’m not one, and by your language usage it seems neither are you. But then being anonymous you’re whatever you need to be.

As for major media…duh. That’s why major media that portrays these things positively tends to get criticized. Not always, unfortunately. Even negative portrayals can come under fire, also unfortunate. But to insist that only mass media can influence people is comically shortsighted. Ignoring how large fanfics can get (Twilight for instance, it’s inception, and how it romanticized abusive relationships being a good example), their impact is apparent by just this conversation here. People willing to attack, and defend, fanfic aggressively because of these things. Enough to make terms like “anti.”

Now this may get a bit personal, and I’m sorry, but you’re choice of language is telling. Antis, portraying people who criticize pedophilic material as the real villains, etc. Insisting callouts on this are done to hurt others, that people defending are victims, etc. These arguments are used for literally every fucking defense of fanfic. Oh something horribly racist, or objectifying gay or trans bodies? “Oh the author is exploring their gender or sexuality” and the like. Actually lemme expand that, not just fanfic, but Fandom as a whole, fic, art, all that. It’s to the point I see some good people put on their blinders and defend the craziest stuff they’re normally against because it’s Fandom.

I’ll give you that often callout culture here is pretty fucking warped at times, and there are big debates of various victims of being “wrong,” but these points keep being used to silence anyone who points out something is fucked up. How many posts go around that despite criticisms of callout culture, doesn’t defend many of the people who end called out. The infamous Josh Macedo (was that his name? The canadian guy who used his popularity to manipulate underaged followers) incidents come to mind. Were the posters in his case just trying to hurt someone vulnerable?

If this was about attacking people I’d have reblogged the posts I saw, argue with the ops, rather than posting my thing. I don’t wanna publicly shame people that I trust (and assume still can be trusted) on here.

Unfortunate you had to be on anon, it’s easier reaching people in person. Then again you might not even be someone I know, neither friend nor follower.

But I’m still gonna bring it right back to the last question on my actual post: why do you feel the need to defend these depictions? It doesn’t seem to be about helping csa survivors coping by their reading of this stuff, or you wouldn’t be attacking other csa survivors who criticize you.

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argaliaofficial · 6 years

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i started typing this earlier but then had to go to work so now im just gonna finish it so i get it off my chest

back when i was with my first ex, meg, we went to this private christian school i prolly made a post about this on here before but its topical right now i didnt sleep at all and im tired enough to spill my fucking guts out some more

so anyway we went to this private christian school and thats when it happened. ive honestly repressed a lot of my time there i was not doing great but what i do remember just makes me feel sick. like, meg aside, the school just sucked.

for context the way it was set up was that we had “placement tests” to see where we were in subjects like math and english, and however we did made us get placed in PACEs according to our skill level. in theory this is fine i suppose, but the thing was that there were no alternatives to the PACEs.

PACEs were part of the learning curriculum of our school which was ACE- Accelerated Christian Learning. they were basically little study pamphlets that went over instructions on how to learn certain subjects and whatnot, while also having a christian perspective on things. scripture verses were abundent in them, and they had like a continuous series of comics going in there about their character Ace Virtuson and friends.

Along with the PACEs, the classrooms were set up like an “office” of sorts with cubicles that you sat in. For me honestly that was one of the many hells because it was so cramping and clinical and I just do not learn well in that sort of environment. so you’d sit quietly for like 8 hours a day with occassional breaks with nothing but your PACE pamphlets to work on. you couldnt speak to any body, and if you needed help, there was a flag system in place where you’d put a flag up and have to sit around and wait for a teacher to come assist you, and usually their assistance only lasted briefly because theres countless OTHER students to get to, and nepotism is a thing and if they dont like you or think of you as a problem kid, you’re less likely to get the aid you need.

i was one of those problem kids.

early on, i could manage that set up when my work was easier, but when i hit “high school age” and got into more advance work i began to suffer horribly. it didnt help that at this time, i got with meg, but less about her right now and more about how this school system fucking failed me and others tbh

i do not learn by reading information. at least, i dont retain it. i need to discuss with people, with my peers and professors. i need one on one sometimes, especially with math- my biggest struggle. but how the school was set up made that sort of learning almost impossible. your peers were all at different levels, so group discussion was rare. their were attempts, but they never lasted long, and the extent of the help basically surmounted to the teachers just reading what the PACEs already said and vaguely explaining more, and that blew.

so, me, being a hands on group learner who has to talk and listen to even retain information and needs to be allowed to move around often instead of being cramped up, started to fall behind in my studies. badly. and of course, instead of the teachers trying to asses WHY it was you were falling behind, you got written up and had to have your parents sign a slip. you could get written up for a few things and these were always detentions of sorts. usually they were lunch but if you were bad enough you’d get an after school one. i accumulated these almost once a day and after a while i got tired of having my parents sign them EVERY SINGLE day and just forged their signatures. i got away with that like 75% of the time lol

like they were just for the same shit ‘oh ur kid didnt do their homework blah blah ur kids out of dress code blah blah” and so i was just “whatever” because like... nothing seemed to change i was just being perpetually punished for being unable to keep up in my studies. my parents tried to get a math tutor for me but halfway thru i think freshman year she moved and that was that

i got so fucking sick of just being behind while my other peers seemed to be moving forward that i started bullshitting my work just to get thru. ofc that didnt do anything because i wasnt learning the work, and because i lied about my answers and cheated i got punished again. and i was just like “whatever”

i cried all the time. parent teacher conferences were hell. i always cried. it felt like i couldnt convey to them why i was such a fuckup. like i wasnt making sense, or i was being overemotional. instead of trying to make changes they just talked about how i had to work harder. least i think. i’ll be honest i always just disassociated during those meetings before going into meltdown mode.

on top of that, i was in a “gay” relationship with a classmate, and lots of bad stuff happened. ive always had an overactive imagination. great for being a wannabe artist. not so great when youre already an easily manipulated undiagnosed autistic child. me, her, and my current gf actually had our own little world! thinking back on this now, for me at least it was escapism to try and just cope with how miserable i was at school

i dont know how soon in the “relationship” it was before things got sexual. my concept of time during those years at foursquare is so scattered. according to posts ive seen on dA me and her were together or at least “friends” for 2 years? so actually i think my saying “freshman year in high school” is inaccurate and things got bad the tail end of middle school and continued until i was a sophomore before switching schools.

ANYWAY, so yeah, along with all this school nonsense, i was in a gay relationship, one that was abusive in many aspects. ofc at the time i didnt know that i was being abused! i just thought yknow her forcing herself into me sexually was kinda par the course and i was already kinda a sexually curious kid growing up so like.. i was looking for that i guess? it hurting cuz she went in dry is just to be expected, yadda yadda. pretty sure i cried? and i know for a fact that i still sleep in the room where she raped me like that and its sometimes just “yea i was literally right in that spot when i was raped lol”

and she would constantly want me to touch her sexually too, and when i said “no” and pulled my hand away that she had been trying to force down her pants because i wasnt personally ready to do that she’d always complain and make me feel bad cuz i wasnt comfortable touching her. “i always get you off but you never get me off!”

and at the time i didnt just tell her to fuck off cuz i didnt know any better. i didnt know that it was ok for me to not be ready to do that. i thought i was a bad person for not being ready to pleasure my partner, even tho its not my fault if shes ok w/ pleasuring me, and im ok with being pleasured (even tho tbh it was hit or miss sometimes she just did it lol), but im not ready to touch her, i guess? and like i tried to communicate with her and im pretty sure i told her that if she didnt wanna jerk me off cuz i couldnt do it to her yet that was fine but whatever

on the fourth of july she started groping me out in public while we watched the fireworks and i remember trying to get her to stop cuz i wasnt comfy with doing this in public cuz a) this was years ago and homophobia was a lot more common especially in this boonies town and b) i dont like seeing other couples being handsy in public so i dont want to be handsy in public either

and i remember while shes groping my chest and im trying to get her to stop theres this group of older kids in front of us and they see. and they start snickering. they started snickering at the sight. and i was so mortified and wanted to die.

looking back those kids should get hit by a fucking bus for laughing at someone getting molested and being obviously uncomfortable with it but i guess its funny cuz “lesbians! haha look at that pervy lesbo touching that other lesbian!”

and thats the story of why every fourth of july i want to kill myself

things kept progressing, ofc. i remember one night, while we were camping, i finally caved and fingered her. i forced myself to think “yeah ok i can do this” and i just thought the crippling anxiety i felt was cuz i was nervous to be intimate with my girlfriend for the first time like this, but really i was probably scared she was gonna hurt me since by that point she had. she had made herself perfectly clear in her mannerisms and tone of voice that she was stronger and bigger than me and could hurt me.

and a few occasions she did. one time she started choking me so badly that i honestly thought “oh my god, shes going to kill me here at school”. i still sometimes feel her nails digging into my throat, and i dont think ive ever been as terrified in my life as i was in that moment. i dont think she would have stopped had a teacher not intervened.

there was only one time i ever hit her, and that was before school started, and i had finally lost my shit over how much she kept fucking with me. all i remember was i came to school angry at her. over what i dont remember. she was always toying with my emotions, and i think that it had built up over the time that i finally snapped walked into class before school started, walked over to where she and alyss were talking, and a slapped her across the face before i walked over to my desk

i dont think i got in trouble for that cuz no one snitched? idk i mightve, but i didnt care. i was angry at her, angry at the school, and suicidal.

i remember one time during a break i was crying. a teacher from another class came up to me and asked what was wrong. i told her i wanted to die. she just looked at me all uncomfortable. i think she mightve said something before walking off?

nothing came of that.

i was more worried that i would get in trouble for being in a gay relationship than as apposed to thinking that these teachers- people who are supposed to protect their students- would help me. i gave up on them even recognizing the signs of me being abused. i feel like they wouldnt have even taken it as seriously as we were both “girls”, and this was back before talk of how women can be abusive was more common place. abuse was still strictly seen as male on female violence. and to some people, gay violence was comedic.

eventually, one night, it all came to light. at least, that she and i were sexually involved. that week was a blur. she was taken out of school. it was brushed under the rug. everyone trying to save face i guess and keep other kids from finding out, but somehow i always felt like they knew. they knew that she was taken out of school because of me. because we were gay

i tried to move on, but my studies never got better. i just grew more jaded. i never did any work. i mouthed off to the teachers, continued getting detentions and just plainly stopped caring. no one could get me to do anything. i would play hooky.

and that was just.... my life. perpetual anger at a system that failed me spectacularly. to this day i still hate that place. i cant be there. i was groped and molested and it was treated like nothing

so yeah

thanks for listening to my ted talks

#av talks #text #THIS IS HEAVY #rape mention #abuse mention

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