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pettyprocrastination · 1 year

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whoever this beloved anon was I am so touched by your kindness! You definitely didn’t have to do this but I am so happy you enjoy this idea and I will happily expand upon it for you!

this is just a collection of word vomit bullet points for the time being but I will happily answer any and all questions about this pair!!

warnings: violence, angst, child death (Sarah Miller), foul language, the same warnings that apply to tlou, reader is Sarah's mom and described as having similar features to her.

So the general Idea is that you and Joel are happily married before the outbreak.

You had been Sarah's mother, his high school sweetheart he got pregnant when neither of you were old enough to have any reaction to the pregnancy test other than a fucking panic attack in one another’s arms. but you made it work

you both worked but made time for one another and your sweet girl, going to museums every other weekend and joel insisting on swooping you off for a date every now and then

nothing special. He knows you’re more of a diner gal than anything too fancy that makes you both feel out of place.

On his birthday in 2003, you had planned to tell him that you were pregnant again. But the memories of your own fears of motherhood from all those years ago begin to swirl through your head again and you get cold feel. deciding to tell him the morning after

it is his birthday afterall, you want to focus on him.

but when you’re woken up in the middle of the night because tommy needs to get bailed out, Joel kisses you sweetly one last time before promising he’ll be back and you can’t shake the feeling that something bad is happening.

its you that shakes sarah awake that night. shouting at her to put on her shoes when she’s still rubbing the sleep from her eyes because you’ve been listening to the radio for the past two hours, calling joel again and again and again praying for him to fucking pick up but to no avail.

Sarah, bless your little girl’s bleeding heart is the one who insists you check on the adler’s against your better suspicions and when you find the eldest looming over her daughter, blood and sinew dripping from her mouth, you grab your daughter hand and burst into a full sprint until something slams into your back and sends you tumbling onto their front lawn

its how joel finds you, struggling to keep the once sweet old woman, whose now nothing more than dead eyes and gnashing teeth straining to snap at your pulse point as you push against her while sarah shrieks before your husband runs forward and cracks her skull with a wrench.

there’s hardly a moment of pause, just enough for him to pull you up and into his arms before he’s ushering you both into the car with an urgency.

when the truck crashes, you get separated from them. Perhaps at Tommy’s side when the flames rise and create a wall, separating you from your husband, or maybe pulled into the mob of chaos when trying to escape from those already infected-

all joel knows is that you promise you’ll find him: just get sarah to safety and you’ll meet him at the river

Poor thing is already so frightened, held in her father’s arms with tears streaming down her face insisting they can’t leave you they just can’t but her father kisses her forehead and reassures her its going to be okay

“we just need to be brave, okay babygirl? Your mama’s real tough, she’s gonna be alright.”

he isn’t sure if he’s saying it to his daughter or himself.

but when he comes to the river you aren’t there. Only a soldier who points a gun at the scared little girl in his arms and then he loses everything

its when the light is gone from his daughter’s eyes that he realizes. His voice cracked and raw from sobbing that he looks around to see his brother with drawn in shoulders and tears in his eyes but his wife is nowhere to be found.

Tommy says you got lost in the chaos. Everything was so loud, so sudden that he turned around and suddenly you weren’t there.

Joel wants to go back but its Tommy that stops him, that dulls the red in his vision to a sad faded pink because his brother points at the orange horizon not too far from them, so much of the city is already in flames.

“We’re gonna find her, but not there.”

So Joel searches. for the first year spent in the world post-outbreak its all he did.

He became a smuggler because of it.

Information came at a price and he needed to be able to fucking pay it, whether it be in blood or ration cards. He was willing to do anything to find you or any thin thread that lead your way.

But it’s Tommy that asks him to give up. Not in those words of course.

The youngest Miller knows better than to say something so cruel that would make his brother, the only person he has in this world turn on him.

But his voice is worried when he asks him one night in Boston when he hasn’t even had the chance to wash the blood from his knuckles

“You think she would have wanted this for you?”

the fight that followed his words was brutal. Vicious insults and scarred fists slamming against each brother until they're both too tired and bloody to continue. Each leaning against a wall for support and Tommy’s wavering voice breaking the silence.

“I don’t know where she is, Joel. But I do know you're gonna get yourself killed if you keep lookin’ for her.”

All he can do is nod.

It’s a few days later when he meets Tess. Who has heard plenty of stories about the elder miller’s brutality and wants him to put that muscle to good use for some extra profit.

It begins his new life. One that empty and cold but one he can live.

Until of course, Ellie comes along. The sweet and incredibly opinionated girl that makes him become something akin to the man he thought died twenty years ago.

its when he’s traveling with Ellie, that it happens. When a warm familiarity has settled between the two because so much blood and pain has been shared he can’t help but see her as something close, something bright even though all he can force himself to utter in her reference is “cargo”

when theyre traveling through the woods as Ellie chatters away, probing his memory about a movie that may or may not have existed thirty years ago because her descriptions of the plot are incredibly odd he hears a voice shout for them to stop and finds himself staring at a man- no, a boy- pointing a gun at them.

Ellie stills, but Joel can see enough to know that from the lanky figure and dimpled face that he’s young. Maybe twenty, twenty-two at the oldest, but his eyes dart from Joel to Ellie with a pinprick of fear that allows Joel the time to charge forward and slam him to the ground before wrestling the gun from his hands.

He has enough to time to tuck it under the stranger’s chin before he hears the sound of the safety being turned off and finds himself looking up and seeing a gun just inches from his face.

Joel’s head whips around when Ellie’s voice calls out his name in fear, he turns to see another stranger holding her a gun point, shoulders drawn back and a shadow cast over their face by the had obstructing their identity.

“You hurt one of mine, I hurt one of yours. That a fair deal?”

Its takes him a moment to recognize you. It’s been so long since he’s heard your voice, the sweet tease when you would poke at him each time he woke up late despite the fact that you reminded him to set his alarm the night before, the times you’d chide him with a harsh “Joel Miller!” whispered in public anytime he was able to grab you a bit too passionately to be appropriate in public but the laughter in your voice let him know you were never truly mad at him. You didn’t know how to be.

But that sweetness is buried under a cold rasp that cuts through the air as you point a rifle at the scared little girl in front of you.

“You think I won’t?” You’re older now, skin covered in scars from a life he didn’t know you got the chance to live and your eyes are cold as they regard your husband. “Put the gun down and get the fuck off of him, I won’t repeat myself.”

Joel mumbles your name in awe. The woman he loved, the woman he mourned the one he fought so hard to find stands before him like some sort of hallucination and suddenly the world feels like its spinning until you bark orders at him again.

“You’ve got five seconds Joel, make a fucking choice before I make it for you.”

He looks down and realizes the boy under him, the one with the bleeding nose and snarling face has your eyes and his dimples.

“One.”

The one above him has Sarah’s hair. Soft brown curls that shine under the sun.

“Two”

Wait. No, they both do.

“Three.”

Twins. Jesus fucking Christ you had twins.

“Four.”

Joel holds the rifle up above his head and the one boy standing snatches it from his grasp, tossing it to the ground and kicking it far from his reach. He slowly stands, allowing your son- dear god your son- to scramble to his feet.

Your voice softens just for a moment. “You okay, Duke?”

Blood stains the bottom half of his face from where Joel slammed his fist into the boy’s nose just moments before, but he nods nonetheless.

Now, they both stand on one side of you and he can see the resemblance clear as day the same way he would whenever Sarah was by your side.

When you order him to hand over his bag, he does so without question before telling Ellie to do the same.

She watches him with wide eyes, her hands still up in the air but gaping at her companion as if he had grown a second head.

“Joel!” “Just do it, alright?”

He doesn’t miss the way you watch their interaction with narrowed eyes until she tosses her bag to you and you slowly lower your gun.

“Now, you want to tell me what the fuck you think you’re doin’ at my home?”

#joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #i had an idea of something similar for tommy but on outbreak night he uh. abandons you instead of getting separated from you #because. angst :D #people say nice things #this was incredibly generous of you anon thank you so so much!#i may get myself a little starbucks drink this week now because I havent had starbucks since like january 1st lol #joel reeling from taking in all this information and also realizing he suckerpunched HIS OWN KID #id like to apologize for all the grammatical issues with this. this is just a bulletpoint word vomit to get my thoughts on the page before-#-beginning the actual fic. also I have to do a midterm tonight and this is my treat to myself hehe #but yes. joel getting separated from his wife on outbreak night and having to accept that shes probably dead #meanwhile youve lived this entire life without him because you think HES dead ad raising your boys all on your own #which just- further digs into his insecurities about failing in his role as a protector #he couldn't save sarah. he can't save ellie and he couldn't even save you #he thinks about you pregnant and alone. fending for yourself in a world full of infected and raiders and his chest grows tight again #this is all followed by Ellie going >:O 'you KNOW THIS PSYCHO?'and then joel immediately snapping at her to WATCH HER MOUTH #because that kid has no filter and he has to explain that youre his wife #anyways joels wife is a badass mfer who also maybe has a little garden and some chickens that you and your boys take care of <3 yeah .#reunion tag #ill be using that for this specific couple because I dont have a fic title yet but if anybody has suggestions!

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promithiae · 2 years

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How to handle seeing things you don't like on ao3:

Have you come across something too disturbing for you to handle on ao3? Like maybe somebody having sex in a position that isnt missionary? 😱 shocking, I know. Did someone maybe engage in mild bdsm? The absolute horror! Did two aged up characters do more than a kiss on the cheek??? The utter depravity. Well do I have a solution for you! It's an easy two step process. Step one is to find the back button. If you find yourself in a mildly uncomfortable position while reading a fanfic, you have the power to stop ❌ press the back button 🔙 and find a new fic that doesnt have such scary concepts 🔞. If you arent sure how to find it, here's what the back button looks like on my mobile browser:

It may be difficult for you to find, but I believe in you!

Step 2 is a little harder because I know you're nosy and think you know what's best for every person on the planet. But I still believe in you! You can do it! You can learn to mind your own damn business and walk away! If you see something you don't like, it's literally not your problem. Let me give you a personal example: there are people out there who still like the show breaking bad, which I found completely unwatchable. But you know what? It's none of my damn business, it's literally not my problem! I have learned that not every piece if media is made for every person, and that's not only ok, but a good thing! You too can learn to mind your own damn business and move on with your life. I promise it's not as hard as it sounds

#ao3 #yeah ok im in the mood to stir up shit #these kids have got me biting through wood beams already this morning #i dont even have my glasses on yet and im steamed up #also sorty to use bb as an example i know its a great show #but it was way too stressful for me #nothing actually against it. bb fans youre great keep doing what youre doing love the memes

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carnivalcarriondiscarded · 9 months

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i don't know what order to start Dissecting, so i'll just start with:

it's absolutely fascinating how the dynamic Wally & Barnaby had - to my knowledge - before the update, and a dynamic i'd seen speculated elsewhere and generally accepted, has been completed turned on its head

see, given that Wally is the "main character" and Barnaby is classified as "his best friend", i got the feeling that Barnaby kind of... tags along on Wally's 'shenanigans'. that he's the sidekick, the best friend. especially since their dynamic has been previously & briefly described as "Barnaby is very polite to Wally." he's the Companion.

but the audios sorta paint a reverse picture. in the Interview, when Barnaby enters stage right, he completely bowls over Wally's introduction and dominates the interview. when the interviewer asks how the two of them are handling the fame, even outright asking Wally, Barnaby doesn't hesitate to answer the question himself, and only about himself. Wally doesn't get another word in edge-wise until the interviewer explicitly singles Wally out.

(now, an argument could be made that Barnaby knew that Wally was somewhat overwhelmed with all of the questions, and tried to take the reins to give him a reprieve. but, considering that the interview seems to be very early on the possible timeline - like, very soon after Welcome Home debuted - i don't think this is likely. i doubt Barnaby and Wally would've had the time to solidify their dynamic or really get to know each other that well yet)

and Barnaby continues to take point in pretty much all of their other conversations, too. like in the mystery Howdy/Barnaby/Wally audio, their interaction gives off the vibes that Wally is Barnaby's sidekick, his tag-along.

(on a related tangent, it's fascinating how the website described the episodes as "[beginning] with Wally introducing the focus or theme for the day before coming across other characters who would join him on his escapades until the end of the day." but from pretty much everything we've seen so far, it seems like He's the one who's just along for the ride, bouncing from neighbor shenanigan to neighbor shenanigan instead of having his own adventures.

of course, if the 14 audios are present time, which is honestly somewhat likely, this could be because the show isn't running. they aren't doing episodes - they're just existing, doing their things. no need for Wally to take point in any way shape or form. tangent over)

in the 14 audios with Barnaby, he doesn't even acknowledge Wally until the very end - which, of course, could be because that's how the scenes are set up. except that in some of them, the characters do directly acknowledge Wally's presence outside of the endings. Eddie in 5-14, Howdy and Poppy in 1-14, and Frank in 4-14 (technically, since he was infodumping to Wally at the very start before Barnaby interrupted). you'd think that a guy would try to include his best friend a little more!

maybe i'm reading into it too much. & given what we know about Wally as a character, it would make sense for Barnaby to be the go-getter Main Guy of the two. but it really seems like its Barnaby & Wally instead of Wally & Barnaby. he's just kinda... there. going along with whatever Barnaby is up to.

but also, on the other side of things - & it's occurring to me as i type this, it's interesting how in a lot of audios, Barnaby seems to seek Wally out. in "Just So", he shows up to fetch Wally. in 4-14, Barnaby interrupts Frank and Wally's gardening session, almost as if he's stopping by to check on his little buddy. in 7-14, Barnaby calls Julie's house (presumably) searching for Wally, or at least checking in once again. something to consider in all of this!

#and if the 14 audios are in the same day along a timeline - which they Are. im trying to puzzle it out rn but anyway -#its interesting how barnaby just kept. checkin. in.#they had three audios where they were already hanging out and then got two (technically three) more where barnaby checked in!#it feels like there's something there...#separation anxiety? a compulsion? love for his buddy? a secret fourth thing?#maybe he could tell something was Off with wally that day...#(which is a topic i will ramble about in a different post)#its a push & pull to be certain....#but yeah that plus all the evidence of Barnaby kinda being the Lead and wally being brushed off to the side....#what a complicated fuckin picture it paints!!! dont know what it means yet!#i have another post im working on centering on how the neighbors seem to treat each other - wally & eddie especially #but this post aint about that. itll be related though #homebogging #wh speculation #please let this have made sense!#when i make posts i just kinda throw myself at it bc i have No organizational skills!#my brain is a complete incoherent mess and i am so sorry if this post is messy <3

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imorphemi · 4 months

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Merry Christmas @merriweather-underground! I was your secret santa and I was absolutely delighted to receive a Team Mustang prompt. I had also been in a big young royai kick when I got it so I was extra excited to work on this lol gah theyre so cute

Def not like, a canon event, I highly doubt any of his team knew him when they were young but heyyy semantics semantics look at them being cute

Thank you to @fmasecretsanta for hosting this!

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ent-is-indecisive · 1 month

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id : a digital painting in dark tones with a golden and purple decorated border. steve is kneeling, bare chested, with his back to the viewer. He is wearing pearl shoulder jewellry and a big circle sigil is shining on the middle of his back and connected to magical binds around his torso, neck and wrists. the end of these ties are wrapped in eddie's hand. Eddie is seated on a wooden vanity dressed in black dress pants and a sheer shiny shirt, open halfway. He is also wearing a ruby necklace shining the same colour as the magic and reflecting in his eyes. /end id

Here is the drawing i sent off for the reverse big bang and that @viviseawrites made so much better ! We've mostly worked separately so I am just as excited as you all to go read "they gave you life, and in return, you gave them hell"

#im normal :) ..... my favourite part is the border #this changed direction like 3 times #i have 3 different 'original' sketches #anyways! actual tags #steddie #stranger things reverse big bang #steve harrington #eddie munson #yeah no im tagging it in the drawing idk what V is going for yet #sub steve harrington #dom eddie munson #cw bare chest #magic binding #i dont actually know what to tag so idk feel free to pitch in #birdsongisland #nsft #suggestive

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lavenoon · 11 months

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@naffeclipse I have nothing to say for myself, looming Eclipse got away from me

*self insert is not a girl (he/she)

og detective au by sunnys-aesthetic!

#post let luce #dcamv #sleuth jesters #me yesterday: yeah im not really simp yet but getting there; who knows when #me today in my simp hat: hi #police chief had his “this mf is nearly 10ft tall” shenanigans #now it's the bounty hunter's turn #this is SO SO SO self indulgent #if I had a shred of shame left I wouldn't post this #hhh abt having to add the disclaimer in the caption but I've been cis-ified in tags one time too often /lh #so gotta have smth ppl who dont follow me see also #anyways yes. have him. please take him off my hands this man is NOT paying rent in my head---#my art #bloodstain fool #menace4menace

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ruinationz · 6 months

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tired: caine x pomni, in the sense that caine is trying to keep her there forever with his own malicious intentions (and pomni has given up entirely, probably on the verge of abstracting if caine will even LET her), or pomni is using the relation in order to escape . very bad. very ooc. what is wrong with you

wired: caine x pomni: in the sense that they both understand that they cannot be together forever and that's ok. they still love eachother so so SO much nothing can change that and are ACTIVELY working to help pomni escape in a way that she can bring caine with her.

sometimes they find themselves thinking "i want to be with you forever", then pausing and going "...when exactly is 'forever', really?". sometimes one panics over the idea of being abandoned and going back to square one all over again, or one of them abstracting, or some horrible event that will separate the two. but they understand that the shitty situation exists and is stopping them from anything further, and they're trying to fix it as best as they can. and even if they do part one day (in the case that caine is unable to, somehow, come to the physical world), who cares? they'll have one another in their hearts, holding their memory close for as long as they live

then again it's 8 in the morning, im half-asleep, and have no idea what im doing

#ask 2 tag #i dont know im seeing a bit of art where pomni is sad and has genuinely given up and allowed caine's whims and “malice” on her #(very ooc #really #its so gross #oh my god stop it)#like really ive seen it im gonna keep it as vague as possible #but like... gross? he would never do that #i might just be crazy (fixated since the january teaser)#but he is NOT the guy to willingly harm someone #yeah sure i need to admit the relation is messy considering blah blah 'le wacky web god and the human soul that got dragged in by something #that we arent sure of yet' but making it straight ABUSE? you're weird!#please block me if you do that...so srs #the amazing digital circus #tadc #showtime #flippy.txt

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ganondoodle · 7 months

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another unfinished rough mock up for a game i dream about making

you can have Eadrya as a companion to help you out; they can support you in fights via either protecting you or dealing damage or just being someone to talk to while you explore, maybe you can tell them how much damage they should do if you let them be aggressive since they are incredibly powerful and enjoy fighting and might make thigns a little to easy

i also liked the idea of some of their markings glowing in the dark, maybe they change slightly so there a chance everytime you see them in the dark their pattern changes?

(also in the background is the planet ring visible ... tho im not good at drawing it yet, some floating islands and a base on the left side)

(original art)

#ganondoodles #art #original art #artists on tumblr #unfinished #i know its all pretty rough but i dont think im good enough yet to make it look like a real game #also i keep fueling my dreams about it #and given that im alone and would have to larn basically everything to do with a 3d game ....#yeah this isnt something i can ever achieve #so i really shouldnt be thinking too much about this bc im just ... making my want to do this stronger

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codecicle · 8 months

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LIBERAL RIPTIDE:

CHIP "BISEXUAL" JAMES JRWI 🏳️‍🌈

GILLION TIDESLAYER💧💧💅

GAY FERIN⁉️

OLLIE TRANSGENDER‼️

OLD MAN POLYGAMOUS 🗣🔥🔥

DREY PANSEXUAL ⁉️⁉️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

GAYFFON 🦅🦅🦅

QUEEN ‼️ I GUESS⁉️⁉️

niklaus hendrix

FAGGOT FROG FELIPE 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

#i make yet anothet post just for me 👍#jrwi #yeah i dont know what this means either #holding back laughter in class while typing this #tag yourself im old man polygamous

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givemewallywestorgivemedeath · 6 months

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I always thought that handcuffs were kinda stupid. As a little kid I would watch movies where the bad guys were hauled away in cuffs and I'd always think "alright, I guess that's inconvenient for them?" but I never really understood why they didn't just... take them off and escape

This curiosity heightened when I saw that my aunt had real metal handcuffs that locked with a real key and I quickly, before any adult could see what I was doing, shackled both my wrists with the cuffs as tight as they could go.

And when I say tight, I mean tight. I had reaaaaal skinny wrists and I was a child wearing adult handcuffs, so you'd think the cuffs would be loose but nope. Those things weren't circular anymore, they'd folded in so much that they looked more like the shape a cat's pupils turn when they're mad.

And what they don't tell you about real handcuffs? Those suckers are sharp. The inside edges are almost bladed, I guess to discourage exactly what I was trying to do but that certainly didn't stop my curious lil neurodivergent brain, oh no no.

Anyway, after about five minutes of pulling, straining, huffing and puffing, I finally went to find the adult with the key.

I was so disappointed.

And so, so hopelessly confused.

Course, no one questioned why I had locked my aunt's handcuffs and why I needed them unlocked. And, of course, I didn't communicate my confusion in any way.

So it wasn't until way later in life, when I had quickly shimmied out of one of those indestructible water park wristbands and saw the horrified eyes of my friends watching me with morbid glee, that I discovered that, apparently, most people can't dislocate their thumbs at will.

The moral of the story here is that neurodivergent children have no concept of typical versus atypical and that I cannot be contained by your petty mortal means.

#personal #tangent #irl story #i was just thinking about this cause I saw yet another movie with handcuffs and my reaction immediately was confusion #and i had to stop. and be like 'no. that person is STUCK. they aren't just playing along because handcuffs are a universal time out rule'#because yeah. i did think that everyone was just really polite and chill about the universal handcuff timeout rule...#and not that they actually just... couldn't get out #imagine not being able to fold your hands into a perfect cylinder the same size as your wrist tho. wild. how u live like that?#it took me five minutes to get out of the handcuffs CAUSE THOSE FUCKERS ARE SHARP #anyway i don't wanna know why my aunt had those #im neurodivergent i dont ask questions

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