thedevilmademedo1t

[thedevilmademedo1t]

you know it really isnt immoral, if you do it right, to raise cows and sheep for meat. so. well. i think there should be a story about, vampires who have a town of humans that they keep well-maintained, so long as the humans donate their blood once a month, like vampire blood farm stuff

but instead of antagonistic everyone's like. no he's a nice man you leave the count alone. he keeps us safe and cared for and he just needs a lil snack now and then, it dont hurt anyone. like a cow that loves the farmer and the farmer that loves the cow, even with both knowing one will end up on the other's table. because its like. its like. cows just have such pretty eyes, you know? they love you so much. i think it should be like that

#i wanna write it #maybe #dont hold me to this at all

[thedevilmademedo1t]

I texted this to my mum about ten minutes after i saw this post. Thank you @neil-gaiman for helping my wallet cry

Sandman Volume 1 is for sale on Amazon for over half off, at $14.68. That's the first three Sandman books in one volume for less than the cost of one of them. Obviously I would prefer that you bought your copy from a local bookstore or comic shop. And just as obviously, some of you are on tight budgets and will be glad to know this is happening right now.

[thedevilmademedo1t]

Its shocking to me how much one letter can change something. For example:

Auguste: beloved big brother to Laurent, gone from this earth too early. A good man who would have saved Laurent from all of the trauma if he could have. RIP

August: eat shit and die 🙃

Thats all thanks for coming to my TED talk

#devil talks #devil should probably not #captive prince #auguste of vere #young royals #august horn #language #not to be trusted

[thedevilmademedo1t]

Awhile ago @ouidamforeman made this post:

This shot through my brain like a chain of firecrackers, so, without derailing the original post, I have some THOUGHTS to add about why this concept is not only hilarious (because it is), but also...

It. It kind of fucks. Severely.

And in a delightfully Pratchett-y way, I'd dare to suggest.

I'll explain:

As inferred above, both Crowley AND Aziraphale have canonical Biblical counterparts. Not by name, no, but by function.

Crowley, of course, is the serpent of Eden.

(note on the serpent of Eden: In Genesis 3:1-15, at least, the serpent is not identified as anything other than a serpent, albeit one that can talk. Later, it will be variously interpreted as a traitorous agent of Hell, as a demon, as a guise of Satan himself, etc. In Good Omens --as a slinky ginger who walks funny)

Lesser known, at least so far as I can tell, is the flaming sword. It, too, appears in Genesis 3, in the very last line:

"So he drove out the man; and placed at the east of the garden of Eden Cherubims, and a flaming sword which turned every way, to keep the way of the tree of life." --Genesis 3:24, KJV

Thanks to translation ambiguity, there is some debate concerning the nature of the flaming sword --is it a divine weapon given unto one of the Cherubim (if so, why only one)? Or is it an independent entity, which takes the form of a sword (as other angelic beings take the form of wheels and such)? For our purposes, I don't think the distinction matters. The guard at the gate of Eden, whether an angel wielding the sword or an angel who IS the sword, is Aziraphale.

(note on the flaming sword: in some traditions --Eastern Orthodox, for example-- it is held that upon Christ's death and resurrection, the flaming sword gave up it's post and vanished from Eden for good. By these sensibilities, the removal of the sword signifies the redemption and salvation of man.

...Put a pin in that. We're coming back to it.)

So, we have our pair. The Serpent and the Sword, introduced at the beginning and the end (ha) of the very same chapter of Genesis.

But here's the important bit, the bit that's not immediately obvious, the bit that nonetheless encapsulates one of the central themes, if not THE central theme, of Good Omens:

The Sword was never intended to guard Eden while Adam and Eve were still in it.

Do you understand?

The Sword's function was never to protect them. It doesn't even appear until after they've already fallen. No... it was to usher Adam and Eve from the garden, and then keep them out. It was a threat. It was a punishment.

The flaming sword was given to be used against them.

So. Again. We have our pair. The Serpent and the Sword: the inception and the consequence of original sin, personified. They are the one-two punch that launches mankind from paradise, after Hell lures it to destruction and Heaven condemns it for being destroyed. Which is to say that despite being, supposedly, hereditary enemies on two different sides of a celestial cold war, they are actually unified by one purpose, one pivotal role to play in the Divine Plan: completely fucking humanity over.

That's how it's supposed to go. It is written.

...But, in Good Omens, they're not just the Serpent and the Sword.

They're Crowley and Aziraphale.

(author begins to go insane from emotion under the cut)

In Good Omens, humanity is handed it's salvation (pin!) scarcely half an hour after losing it. Instead of looming over God's empty garden, the sword protects a very sad, very scared and very pregnant girl. And no, not because a blameless martyr suffered and died for the privilege, either.

It was just that she'd had such a bad day. And there were vicious animals out there. And Aziraphale worried she would be cold.

...I need to impress upon you how much this is NOT just a matter of being careless with company property. With this one act of kindness, Aziraphale is undermining the whole entire POINT of the expulsion from Eden. God Herself confronts him about it, and he lies. To God.

And the Serpent--

(Crowley, that is, who wonders what's so bad about knowing the difference between good and evil anyway; who thinks that maybe he did a GOOD thing when he tempted Eve with the apple; who objects that God is over-reacting to a first offense; who knows what it is to fall but not what it is to be comforted after the fact...)

--just goes ahead and falls in love with him about it.

As for Crowley --I barely need to explain him, right? People have been making the 'didn't the serpent actually do us a solid?' argument for centuries. But if I'm going to quote one of them, it may as well be the one Neil Gaiman wrote ficlet about:

"If the account given in Genesis is really true, ought we not, after all, to thank this serpent? He was the first schoolmaster, the first advocate of learning, the first enemy of ignorance, the first to whisper in human ears the sacred word liberty, the creator of ambition, the author of modesty, of inquiry, of doubt, of investigation, of progress and of civilization." --Robert G. Ingersoll

The first to ask questions.

Even beyond flattering literary interpretation, we know that Crowley is, so often, discreetly running damage control on the machinations of Heaven and Hell. When he can get away with it. Occasionally, when he can't (1827).

And Aziraphale loves him for it, too. Loves him back.

And so this romance plays out over millennia, where they fall in love with each other but also the world, because of each other and because of the world. But it begins in Eden. Where, instead of acting as the first Earthly example of Divine/Diabolical collusion and callousness--

(other examples --the flood; the bet with Satan; the back channels; the exchange of Holy Water and Hellfire; and on and on...)

--they refuse. Without even necessarily knowing they're doing it, they just refuse. Refuse to trivialize human life, and refuse to hate each other.

To write a story about the Serpent and the Sword falling in love is to write a story about transgression.

Not just in the sense that they are a demon and an angel, and it's ~forbidden. That's part of it, yeah, but the greater part of it is that they are THIS demon and angel, in particular. From The Real Bible's Book of Genesis, in the chapter where man falls.

It's the sort of thing you write and laugh. And then you look at it. And you think. And then you frown, and you sit up a little straighter. And you think.

And then you keep writing.

And what emerges hits you like a goddamn truck.

(...A lot of Pratchett reads that way. I believe Gaiman when he says Pratchett would have been happy with the romance, by the way. I really really do).

It's a story about transgression, about love as transgression. They break the rules by loving each other, by loving creation, and by rejecting the hatred and hypocrisy that would have triangulated them as a unified blow against humanity, before humanity had even really got started. And yeah, hell, it's a queer romance too, just to really drive the point home (oh, that!!! THAT!!!)

...I could spend a long time wildly gesturing at this and never be satisfied. Instead of watching me do that (I'll spare you), please look at this gif:

I love this shot so much.

Look at Eve and Crowley moving, at the same time in the same direction, towards their respective wielders of the flaming sword. Adam reaches out and takes her hand; Aziraphale reaches out and covers him with a wing.

You know what a shot like that establishes? Likeness. Commonality. Kinship.

"Our side" was never just Crowley and Aziraphale. Crowley says as much at the end of season 1 ("--all of us against all of them."). From the beginning, "our side" was Crowley, Aziraphale, and every single human being. Lately that's around 8 billion, but once upon a time it was just two other people. Another couple. The primeval mother and father.

But Adam and Eve die, eventually. Humanity grows without them. It's Crowley and Aziraphale who remain, and who protect it. Who...oversee it's upbringing.

Godfathers. Sort of.

#im not crying youre crying #good omens #ineffable husbands #aziracrow #good omens 2 #crowley #aziraphale #good omens meta #holy shit this one got me boys #this is beautiful #good job op

[thedevilmademedo1t]

Updated

Hi! Im Ronan, im 24 years old, and im looking for people to rp with! They must be over the age of 18, be okay with communicating via discord, have decent grammar and reply length. I cant really work with a sentence by sentence rp. Below is a list of fandoms and ships im interested in rping, along with the character that im wanting to write for:

Captive Prince:

Lamen (Laurent)

Nik/ Auguste (Auguste)

The Raven Cycle:

Pynch (Adam)

Merlin:

Merthur (either)

(Very ooc bc im v far behind) BNHA:

Kiribaku (either)

Todobaku (todoroki)

Shinkami (shinso)

Young Royals:

Wilmon (either tbh)

These are just the ones off the top of my head and im totally open to discussing any other fandoms and pairings you may have. I am very into AU's and am generally open to any and all suggestions! If youre interested, DM me which fandom/ ship youre interested in and I'll give you my discord info so that we can discuss what kind of rp you may be looking for! Im also open to an OC rp if you have any ideas that you want to see played out! (Im a sucker for university/ anything academia when it comes to my oc’s!)

#rp #captive prince #damen of akielos #laurent of vere #trc #the raven cycle #pynch #ronan lynch #adam parrish #merlin #arthur pendragon #merlin and arthur #bnha #kiribaku #shinkami #todobaku #young royals #wilhelm young royals #simon young royals #wilmon

[thedevilmademedo1t]

I love Mary Bonnet. I really want her to somehow be in the second season (i know she wont be but i can dream).

She and Stede are honestly a great (platonic) pairing. Once they aired their grievances with each other we got to see them team up and do The Most for Stedes “faked death fuckery”. I want them to have a great relationship going forward, but i also know that Stede is “dead” and Mary is moving on with the life she created for herself (love that for her).

Just. Mary as a reluctant sailor who gets up to shenanigans with her ex husband whenever they meet up on the high seas.

Did i have a point? I dont remember.

#mary bonnet #stede bonnet #our flag means death #ofmd #they could be delightful your honor #devil talks #devil should probably not #my hcs #random ramblings

[thedevilmademedo1t]

hot hot hot hot

#hi yes im gay #ofmd #our flag means death #jim jimenez #ofmd spoilers #devil talks #devil should probably not #help

[thedevilmademedo1t]

OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5 OCTOBER 5

Holy shit im so ready

#ofmd #ofmd season 2 #our flag meets death #our flag means death teaser #stede bonnet #ed teach #blackbeard

[thedevilmademedo1t]

Im in love with Heartstopper. Its a giant comfort show for me where the characters actually communicate with eachother and show just as much love to their friends as they do tot heir partners.

It also leaves me aching and hollow because i am a 20 something queer adult who never got those experiences at that age, and i never will.

Its such a strange thing. I think, once all of the seasons are out (s3 is confirmed and Alice said that the story could be told in 4) it will become a permanent fave (moreso than it already is), and for now i must content myself with rewatching both seasons and then watching people react to them on youtube.

Did i have a point? Nope. Im having a bad mental health day and i want to cry and so I’m watching Heartstopper on a loop. That is all.

#devil talks #devil should probably not #heartstopper #heartstopper s2 #nick nelson #charlie spring #nick and charlie #nick x charlie #help these gays are trying to kill me

[thedevilmademedo1t]

This is so funny to me bc like. Love the meme. Brilliant. 10/10 no notes.

However, i also work somewhere that gives people marriage liscenses and marriage certificates (theyre the same thing. Its just one is unsigned and the other is signed). And yall.

You can get a new marriage certificate thats exactly the same as the original for less than $10.

Which is also hilarious to me bc now bal can come home and be like “look what i have” and its a perfect copy and ambrosias(?) would just be like “what the fuck”

Anyway. Its probably not funny to anyone else but oh well

He absolutely would do this and you can't convince me otherwise.

#nimona 2023 #nimona #ballister boldheart #ambrosius goldenloin #goldenheart #ballister x ambrosius #devil talks #devil should probably not #i have an adult job #this is wack

[thedevilmademedo1t]

Ive been rotating between GO2 and Heartstopper 2 like an infinite rotating door and im ready to pull my hair out. The Gays are being fed this month but at what cost

Going from (the end of) s2 of Good Omens into s2 of Heartstopper was like being attacked by a thousand razor blades and then finding yourself bafflingly cuddling a slightly emo unicorn. I have emotional whiplash, and we haven’t even gotten to Red, White, and Royal Blue (premiering at the end of this week) yet. I suspect at that point, I’m just going to explode, like a rainbow colored glitter bomb of feels.

#god im unwell #good omens #heartstopper #red white and royal blue #summer of queer media #h e l p m e #devil talks #devil should probably not #crowley and aziraphale #ineffable husbands #nick nelson #charlie spring #nick and charlie #alex claremont diaz #henry fox mountchristen windsor #firstprince

[thedevilmademedo1t]

Not Henrys sarcastic little head turn when he says that Alex is willing to admit hes wrong. Your honor i love them

THEY ARE SO CHAOTIC WHAT THE FUCK IT'S PERFECTION

#they are so perfect #the chemistry is chemistrying #nick and taylor are so perfect as firstprince #red white and royal blue #firstprince #alex claremont diaz #henry fox mountchristen windsor #nicholas galitzine #taylor zakhar perez #rwrb film #i cant fucking wait #one week #!!!!!!!!!1

[thedevilmademedo1t]

Yall idk what im gonna do after next week. Its gonna be a gay show hangover that i am not emotionally, mentally or physically prepared for.

I guess i’ll just have to watch them all. Over. And over. And over again. oh no.

I just have to last to october and then foist all my problems off on ofmd season 2

#devil talks #devil should probably not #good omens #crowley #aziraphale #ineffable husbands #rwrb #rwrb film #red white and royal blue #prince henry of wales #henry fox mountchristen windsor #alex claremont diaz #heartstopper #heartstopper 2 #nick and charlie #nick nelson #charlie spring #im gay your honor #jsyk #ofmd #our flag means death #ed teach #blackbeard ofmd #stede fucking bonnet #stede bonnet #gentlebeard #blackbeard x stede

[thedevilmademedo1t]

Update:

Heartstopper 2 was awesome and gave me a lot of happy feels but also made me cry so its more of a net positive but. Red, White and Royal Blue its all on you now lets goooo

(Heartstopper was lovely and im literally rewatching it right this second but i need a solid conclusion and, given the fact that its an ongoing series, i dont have that. It ended on a wonderful note though!! Go watch it!!)

Heartstopper 2 and Red, White and Royal Blue better fix my entire personality because good omens 2 just tore out my insides and stomped on them. I plan on being unwell for the next month thank you for your time

#devil talks #devil should probably not #heartstopper #nick nelson #charlie spring #nick and charlie #rwrb movie #rwrb #red white and royal blue #henry fox mountchristen windsor #alex claremont diaz #firstprince #i love them your honor

[thedevilmademedo1t]

I am unwell thank you so much for this

“U can't just make an ofmd edit with a queen song! That can kill the weak hearted!!!” - @dacavendishtime

and yet i did it anyway.

#ofmd #blackbeard ofmd #ofmd spoilers #ofmd edit #edit #fan edit #our flag means death #ofmd stede #our flag means death stede #i fucking love this show #ed teach #gentlebeard

[thedevilmademedo1t]

Aplease i need this

SPOILERS FOR GOOD OMENS SEASON 2

I have this fic idea in my head that I tried writing but I need to get the whole thing out.

Like literally right after s2 ep 6 ends, Crowley takes off to Hob Gadling's place, basically a sobbing mess.

Crowley figures if anyone kind of understands what he's going through its Hob.

Hob immediately is like come in, let's get wasted and figure out what to do next. They get drunk, Crowley tells him about the craziness of the last few days and Hob's heart just like breaks for Crowley. Because he knows how scary it is to finally tell that other person how you feel and be rejected (even if that isn't exactly what happened in 1889 but close enough).

But while Hob is comforting Crowley, Morpheus receives a visitor from the silver city- the new supreme archangel: Aziraphale.

Aziraphale, using the excuse of meeting allies to heaven and becoming reacquainted with them blah blah blah, is actually here to get Morpheus' advice.

Morpheus is more confused on why Aziraphale thought heaven would be better than earth. Heaven is boring, with strict rules on which stories can be told and layers of manipulation and gaslighting.

(essentially he thinks heaven is very toxic and understands why Lucifer did what he did, they did whatever)

"There is no fixing the Silver City, guardian of the eastern gate. It is as the creator wishes it to be."

When they get to talking about how Aziraphale can fix this mess, he asks the dreamlord, how did you get Hob to forgive you.

And Morpheus has to explain, oh no Hob is just like that. He's very forgiving. Though, part of him is now wondering how the fuck this random angel and demon knew about Hob and his relationship's history.

Eventually Aziraphale and Morpheus go to Hob's to see what the immortal thinks Zira should do.

Except Crowley is there, on Hob's couch, an absolute mess. Crying, messed up hair, the whole thing.

And Hob? Oh Hob is giving Aziraphale a total death glare. If looks could kill, the archangel would have been struck down immediately.

He might be forgiving of others towards himself, but someone hurts his friends? Well, that's a totally different story.

#good omens #good omens s2 #good omens 2 spoilers #crowley #aziraphale #aziracrow #ineffable husbands #hob gadling #dream of the endless #the sandman #fanfic #please for the love of god #please write this

[thedevilmademedo1t]

if i had a nickel for every time a gay show gave me a gay kiss before ruining my gay life…

id have two nickels. which isn’t alot but its FUCKING DEVASTATING THAT ITS HAPPENED TWICE

#i hate these fucking shows #(theyre my favourite shows) #anyways i need them to be happy #good omens #good omens s2 #good omens spoilers #ofmd #our flag means death #ineffable husbands #crowley x aziraphale #i hate it here #i wanna go home