newstudentdiaries

[newstudentdiaries]

some black and whites

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[newstudentdiaries]

Overwhelmed

I decided to stop taking the pill to see how it affects me. I have horrible PMS (especially the mental symptoms). I think it might be nice to see how it is now since I've been taking it for 6 years now. Maybe my hormone-balance changed over the last few years now that i'm out of puberty.

My head is so full I feel like it will explode.

Also, why are groceries so fucking expensive??? What the fuck?? I guess I need a new job gahdamn.

Also, why are so many philosophers so horrible as people?? What field am I getting into .. pls

⋆⭒˚‧₊˚°❀⋆₊⊹⋆⭒˚‧₊˚°❀⋆₊⊹⋆⭒˚‧₊˚°❀⋆₊⊹⋆⭒˚‧₊˚°❀⋆₊⊹⋆⭒˚‧₊˚°❀⋆₊⊹⋆⭒˚‧₊˚°❀⋆₊⊹

#girlblogging #diary #moving out #new school #university #philosophy #student life #studying #studyblr #study blog #menstruation #periods #mental health #pms #burn out #overwhelmed #what the fuck #femcel #female manipulator #girlhood #girl blogger #girlblog #this is a girlblog

[newstudentdiaries]

Woman has ovaries, a uterus; these peculiarities imprison her in her subjectivity, circumscribe her within the limits of her own nature. It is often said that she thinks with her glands. Man superbly ignores the fact that his anatomy also includes glands, such as the testicles, and that they secrete hormones.

The second sex, Simone de Beauvoir

#diary #girlblogging #university #philosophy #student life #studying #simone de beauvoir #art #feminism #literature #lit #quote #books and libraries #excerpts #misandry #gender roles

[newstudentdiaries]

₊˚🕯️♱‧₊˚.october₊˚🕯️♱‧₊˚.

One month into uni, time to set some goals!

Afer the first month I finally feel like I'm getting my grip on reality back. It all felt so unbelievably weird. As if I were outside of the situation observing myself about how I acted and felt without actually feeling or thinking it directly. However! Now that i have cried a few times I feel all adjusted again. Sometimes my emotions have to get ahead of me. First feel then realise what you felt all this time. Anyways, now I want to change some habits that I have found myself stuck in.

Self-care

everyday skincare! I always feel so nice after

reading first thing in the morning

going to get ready for bed around 22:30. I cannot function otherwise, which i learnt the hard way

drink enough water

try to eat protein with every meal

try to workout at least 3 times a week

Philosophy and learning

No finishing assignments the morning before the lecture. Make sure you get a slow morning.

Update your planner daily. Stick to it.

entire month of duo lingo arabic!!

Start reading for fun again, not just uni! Try to do your uni reasons after class.

Sit in the library more, make sure to use recources you get.

indulge yourself in philosophy beyond the assignments you get. i.e. via life of school on youtube or talk with classmates about it.

Leisure

Bake!! Bake yummy things for your friends and family :)

Pick. Up. Guitar. Again.

Read read read, make a tbr list for this month with at least 2 books you have been wanting to read for months now!

Make a yummy meal with the perfect wine pairing once a week !

Watch bojack horseman and enjoy it like always. Also, it is gilmore girls season! Make sure sundays are recharge days where schoolwork is secondary and you can focus on having fun and feeling good after a draining week of reading.

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

#diary #girlblogging #moving out #new school #university #books and libraries #art #productive #productivity #gilmore girls #october #fall #fall season #baking #hobbies #studying #school #student life #philosophy #life #university student #uni #college #student #politics #society #philosopshy #personal #simone de beauvoir

[newstudentdiaries]

Georgia O'Keeffe and Cheese, New Mexico, 1960. Tony Vaccaro. Vintage gelatin silver print.

[newstudentdiaries]

its never enough

[newstudentdiaries]

adjusting

week 4 of uni. Things that happened:

fell asleep during a lecture

failed an assignment due to being 3 words above the wordcount

my coffee exploded everywhere

let my smoke alarm go off

got a concussion

fixed my bicycle chain for the first time ever

enjoyed life

started drinking good beers instead of gross pilsner beers

refound my joy for reading

reached a peak in my relationship

Week 4 has been rough, week 1 to 3 were great. Last night I had my first philosophical breakdown where I wondered what I was even studying at uni.

Philosophy has been frustrating due to its lack of answers. Every text I read gives me more questions. Uni is an incredibly strict institution compared to my previous schools.

I am also extremely tired this week. I could physically not keep my eyes open today. I fell asleep and took a 4 hour nap. Brewed some coffee, now I have to do lots of homework that I did not do during my 4 hour nap haha.

I realised my problem: I can't say no to people, because I feel I miss out on opportunities of friendship, love and other meaningful human experiences. Even though I am so tired that I can not even enjoy these activities, I still go and pack my entire week untill I destroy my body.

No more. I am going to eat healthy, excercise and say no. Tonight I decided to cancel my plans. It does not seem like much, but the weight of my shoulders was immediatly lifted.

Adjusting is the main theme in my life right now. It is not as scary as I thought it would be. It is however more draining than I anticipated. I am hopeful, though :) I am loving my life. I am loving my relationships. I am loving philosophy. I am overall loving becoming independent and finding myself within this process.

#diary #girlblogging #moving out #new school #philosophy #adjusting #university #student life #university student #tired

[newstudentdiaries]

Moving day

Today I woke up at 8 am to finish packing and get the last stuff I needed for my little home. My parents and I drove to my new city with two cars entirely packed.

We cleaned the enitre room, put everything away in the cabinets and decorated a little bit. I'm now alone for the first time today. We just had dinner, they went home to our home home. I'm in my bed feeling a little weird.

Incredibly overwhelmed. Feelings of joy and excitement for this new phase but also a lot of guilt and sadness for leaving. I heard about the room a week ago. Now a week later, I'll never live at home anymore.

Tonight a friend will come and stay over. I'm so happy because sleeping here for the first night on my own would just make me a little bit sad I think. I love my new place, It's so nice and serene, but I'm also feeling a little bit empty.

Everything looks perfect and I am happy. I miss my mother, my father, my dog, my brother, my home home. I'm excited and startled.

#moving out #new city #new home #lonely #diary #girlblogging #what the fuck #feelings #thoughts #vent post

[newstudentdiaries]

Update about changes

The introduction week was amazing. I met so many beautiful amazing people there. I feel entirely a part of the community. The festival was great too. I enjoyed sleeping in a tent with my boyfriend. We were organised. everything went great. I haven't had this much fun in a long time.

To make the changes even more drastic, I found a little room! It has its own kitchen. The location is good. I'm so stoked to move in. Only 4 days to go. I'm so excited and scared at the same time. I will miss my family (dog included in family).

I went to ikea with the boyfriend yesterday. He found a room nearby mine as well (5 min). We both bought a little ikea rat. I still need some bigger things like chairs but I feel pretty prepared already.

I want to expres a little more about those feelings of anxiety. Moving out is such a big change. One I thought was months away. Here we are. This is crazy to me. 4 days of living at home to go before i have to say goodbye to everyone and everything i know. Starting with a clean slate sounds good. I thought I'd be more scared. More emotional, at least. But I feel ready. I want something new and I can't wait to build a new little life in this new city.

#moving out #diary #diary entry #blog #girlblogging #university #new school #new house #new friends #lets be friends

[newstudentdiaries]

It's so stupid but the way autumn motivates me to study is insane. mmm hot tea! Now I want to be an all-knowing entity. I will become God for 3 months. I call it the Gilmore girls effect

#autumn #Can't wait for autumn #studying #study #philosopshy #gilmore girls #rory gilmore #motivations #girlblogging #godcomplex

[newstudentdiaries]

New to everything, the good and bad

First post! New to tumblr! New university in 3 weeks.

So many changes in my life at the moment, I felt like i needed a space to share my thoughts. Tumblr it is. I've been on this site for years. But I've never had the courage to actually write something.

Maybe I'll keep this little blog up and going, probably I'll abandon it in 4 weeks.

I'm feeling a lot of anxiety due to changes lately. I feel like my relationship is going rocky. My relationship with my parents is rocky. My friends and I are having some difficulties with keeping in contact. It's so bad I started running. RUNNING. I HATE running. However, I've come to find that the feeling i get from listening to Fiona apple while running for me is the equivelent to punching holes in walls for men.

I'm going to a festival in a few days. I've never been to one and I feel helpless and unprepared. After 4 days of drinking there, 6 days of drinking will follow during my introduction week. The introduction week is a week of festivities where you meet other people who will follow the same study as you the week after. So excited. I can't wait to party and dance and meet new people. But of course, irrational fears and stupid thoughts do rise. Will they like me? Is this my only chance of friendship? Do I act different and start a whole new life in a different city and abandon everyone I know to fully commit to my alter ego? The usual. Luckily I'm still more excited than scared. The pros outweigh the cons.

In three weeks i'm starting uni. I'll be a philosophy major (whoo! MORE to think about). I'm kind of hoping the study will help me rationalize my thoughts. I can't wait for the classes. They all seem super interesting.

Change feels like a double-edged sword to me. Exciting new stuff to try in exciting new environments. Also, terrible fear and constant pondering about failing and dying alone. We'll see!

I'm also new to writing.

I am where the sun shines

I realise that the warmth won't soften my skin any longer.

The warm sand

In which I will dissappear

What else is there?

I'm a whole spread out over shards of habits

How do you guys deal with change? I'd love some help.

#new mutuals? #diary #poetry #change #changes #anxiety #mental health #Asking for advise #new school #new hobbies #mutuals #dealing with change