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impala-dreamer · 6 months

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Pondering Fate While Ignoring The Obvious

A Ten Inch Hero Story

~Priestly has got it so bad for Tish that he can barely see past the end of her... well, her back end, anyway. He's love sick and forever rejected, constantly stuck inside his own head. When a new girl in town starts messing with him, he quickly loses his cool...~

Boaz Priestly x F!Reader

2,511 Words

Warnings: Nuttin' but fluff and banter. ;)

A/N: This is another square for my @jacklesversebingo card. The prompt is "Backhanded Compliment/Convenience Store/Sugar Addict"

Now listen- I've never written for this movie before, but I had so much fun doing it. If you've seen the movie, I think you'll love this. If you haven't seen it, you may not totally get it, but you'll still love it because it's cute and fluffy and I said so. Give it a chance ;)

Another day, another spicy Italian with no oil and no vinegar. How you could eat a hero dry was a question he could never quite grasp the answer to, but in the end, did another weird order really matter? He’d put a condom on the bun if they asked for it. Maybe not a used one, but then again, Tish was looking extra spicy herself today.

Tish. Goddamnit. There she goes flirting with every male in existence except him. There she is leaning over the counter in that not-so-sneaky way that pushes her tits up and out, giving everyone and their mother a look into the valley of the Promised Land.

For fuck’s sake, if she’d only do that for him.

Then again, nothin’ he hadn’t seen before.

Fingers snapped in front of his face and Priestly blinked himself back into reality.

“Can I help you?” he asked, still half dazed and half hard after staring so intently at his coworker.

Piper sighed. “Yeah. You gotta make a run down the street.”

He sighed harder. “You know, you ladies are capable of patronizing the convenience store now and then. It’s not really hard. You just pick out what you need and exchange it for cash.”

The tiny blonde pouted and batted her lashes. “Please? My feet hurt from standing all day.”

He scoffed. “And mine don't?”

“I’m not used to it. I’m delicate.”

Priestly scratched at the bright green spikes that sat atop his head for the day, masquerading as a hairstyle. He frowned but relented. “Fine. Gimme the list.”

He saw her from the street. He wasn’t purposely peeping through the window like a stalker, but he felt like it all the same. It wasn’t his fault, not really. Things mostly stayed the same around town, so when something was different, when someone new showed up, it tended to stick out a bit.

The new girl at the register was cute, not particularly daring in her style or makeup palette, but she was attractive. Probably the thing Priestly noticed first was the lollipop stick hanging from her painted lips.

His entrance was announced by the jangling of bells and she looked up as he came in. She smiled around the pop and twirled the white paper stick between her fingers.

“Welcome.”

He looked back at her over his shoulder and nodded. “Hey.”

Slowly, she pulled the treat from her mouth and licked the very tip. Her tongue was as red as the pop and Priestley was sure that his cheeks were turning the same shade. He cleared his throat quickly and turned back, going about his business.

The store was otherwise empty except for Mr. Jacobson, the old man who never seemed to go anywhere but was always wherever you went. He was currently lingering at the end of the aisle, amazed at the sheer amount of chip flavors the new millennium had to offer.

“Back in my day we had regular and salt & vinegar, and we were grateful!”

Priestly laughed under his breath and looked over the rack at the register. She was laughing softly as well, and when their eyes met, she didn’t shy away.

He did; quickly tearing his gaze from the cherry pop and focusing on the aluminum foil instead. There was no use flirting with her anyway- she’d never go for him. She looked too normal, too pretty to fall for his shenanigans. Best not to even think about it.

Arms fully stocked, he headed her way, keeping his eyes on the black and gray tiled floor and praying she wouldn’t make his heart race any faster.

She sucked hard on the Blow Pop and then took a bite, making him jump. Sugar crackled between her teeth and she winked.

“I hope you overcharge them,” she said dryly, staring him down.

Confusion took the place of shyness and Priestly’s face scrunched up. “What?” he snapped, jerking away from the counter.

The girl rolled her eyes and went about ringing up his order without another word.

Cash exchanged, Priestly thanked her and walked out, still wondering what the hell she was talking about.

Monday.

Priestly stared out the front window, wondering if the day was going to go his way or not. He knew he shouldn’t bother pondering the Fates, because they always seemed against him, but he liked to think he had some hope tucked away somewhere beneath the Manic Panic hair dye and all the metal sticking out of his head. If there was, he couldn’t find any today.

Tish was late, as usual, probably rolling out of some strange guy’s arms and fishing for her bra underneath the bed.

Someday… someday, that’d be his bed she was searching under. Someday, those would be his arms she rolled out of. He just had to keep hoping.

Or not. He really didn’t care.

The sun was too bright, the grill was too hot. He hated everything.

Except the sound of bubblegum popping behind him. He didn’t seem to hate that.

With spatula in hand, he turned and startled just enough to make the bubblegum appear between coyly smiling pink lips.

“Hey.”

Priestley squinted. “You’re that chick from the store.”

Annoyance crept onto her face. “And you’re that dude with too much eyeliner.”

He laughed before realizing she was insulting him and ended up jolting up on his toes awkwardly, half a smile curled on his lip.

He cleared his throat. “Priestly.”

She squinted. “Like Elvis?”

He shrugged. “And you are?”

“Hungry.”

Slapping a five on the counter, she picked up her hero and spun away, heading toward the door. She turned to push it open with her backside and popped her gum again.

Her eyes were glued to him and Priestly felt his stomach flip. He met her gaze and she smiled.

“I always do.”

He wanted to say something, to ask her what the hell she was talking about, but she was gone before the words reached his tongue.

“Always do what?”

Jen turned her head his way, but her eyes were still locked on the computer screen. “What’s up?”

He sighed. “Nothing. Just a weird girl from…nothing.”

It was nothing. She was just the weird girl from down the street. And anyway, he was supposed to be hating everything today, not shifting his ponderance to the mystery of the gum chewing, pop crunching girl from the convenience store.

“Nothing.”

Blue hair; don’t care.

Priestly cracked an egg on the grill and watched the edges sizzle. He wasn’t great at a lot of things, but cooking eggs was something he did exceptionally well. The butter bubbled around the perimeter, curling the whites just slightly, and he pushed the tip of his spatula against it.

Not ready yet.

The girls were, yet again, chatting about men, and he kept one ear on the sizzle and the other in their conversation.

“I just don’t understand how hard it is to find. It’s right there.” Tish laughed and pushed a delicate hand back through her hair. “It’s a clit, not the Holy Grail.”

Priestly raised a brow. “Some would call it that though,” he interjected.

She rolled her eyes. “You would.”

Offended, he sucked in a quick breath. “Ya know something-”

She turned, one hand on her hip, waiting. “Yeah?”

His lips pursed and dejected, he turned back to the grill. “Forget it.”

“Thought so,” she laughed.

God, she was such a bitch sometimes. OK, most times, but still.

Tish went back to leaning on the counter and he took the opportunity to peek at her ass.

Behind him, a throat was cleared.

Priestly sighed, knowing what was waiting for him when he turned. Or, rather, who.

“You again.” He batted his lashes.

She smacked her lips. “Me again.” From her pocket, she withdrew a pink Starburst and fiddled with the wrapper.

He eyed the candy and followed it to her mouth. Her lips were darker today and it reminded him of the cherry pop. “You eat too much sugar, you know that?”

She smiled gently. “And you dye your hair too much. That isn’t good for you. All those chemicals are gonna fry your brain.”

“Joke’s on you, it’s already fried- shit!” Fried egg. Burnt to a crisp. “Damnit.”

Sugar Girl swallowed a laugh and the Starburst.

He turned around, annoyed at himself and her laughter. “Are you- do you want something?”

“Yup.” She nodded and took her order from Piper, who was holding a small, paper-wrapped hero. “Thanks.”

Green eyes narrowed on her smile. She was weird. Way too weird. And kinda rude.

“You ever gonna tell me your name?” he asked, calling out as she pushed open the door.

“Sure,” she replied, “Soon as I get my free sample.”

“Huh?”

Confusion always seemed to linger when she left, that and the smell of strawberries. Or cherries, or whatever she’d been sucking on.

Sucking on…

His eyes flickered over to Tish and he wondered if she was as good at sucking things as she claimed.

It was raining and he was cranky.

He’d missed his alarm, the car wouldn’t start, and a passing bus nearly drenched him head to toe.

It wasn’t supposed to rain at the beach. It was practically against the law. Nature’s law, anyway.

And to top it all off, Tish was bragging about the amazing night she’d had with a handsome stranger visiting from New York.

“He’s just in town for a few days, so it’s nothing serious,” she explained to a wide-eyed Piper who was drinking down every word. “But man, I wouldn’t be mad if it was. He’s… tall and handsome and-”

Priestly cleared his throat. “Ya know I’m pretty tall.”

She clicked her tongue. “And?”

His heart ached at her callousness. “And… just thought I’d remind you.”

Maybe she didn’t know what she was doing to him, but he thought his advances were fairly obvious. Maybe she was just a bitch.

Jen derailed his thought train with a shopping list she’d printed out.

He shook his head. “No.”

“Please?”

The shop on the corner was the last place he wanted to go. Nameless Sugar Girl was the last person he wanted to see. “Why do I always have to go?” He pouted and gestured to the window. “It’s pouring rain out there.”

Jen looked up with puppy-dog eyes. “Which is why I’m asking you to please go.”

A heavy sigh was his only reply. Priestly grabbed the paper from her hand, crumpling it beyond repair, and set out into the downpour.

He was dripping by the time he made it down the street. He sneered at the water on his face, rolled his eyes at the welcome mat, swatted viciously at the bells as they rang above his head.

“Rough morning?” she asked, watching his huffy entrance.

He scowled. “You could say that.”

A peppermint rolled on her tongue and the red and white stripes caught his eye. “Well, lemme know if you need any assistance.”

Priestly ran a hand through his teal-tinted hair and shook out a puddle’s worth of rain. “Yeah. Thanks.”

It took him a while to collect the goods, having trouble finding the right paper towels that would fit into the holder in the bathrooms. He’d never had any issues in the store before; seemed like someone had rearranged.

Someone.

He looked across the rows of sundries and wondered what her deal was. Hell, he still didn’t even know her name. Not that he wanted to, of course.

Of course.

Finally, and with much annoyance, he arrived at the register.

She laughed softly as he unloaded his arms.

He shook his head. “What?”

“I… I shouldn’t even touch this one.”

He had no clue what she was talking about, he never did, and he was at the end of his rope.

His patience snapped. “What?”

She sat back, clearly hurt by his tone. “Your shirt.”

She pointed at his chest and he looked down, reading the big black letters upside down.

‘Save a tree, eat a beaver’

His shoulders fell. “Oh. Yeah. Whatever.”

“Yeah,” she echoed, the sting heavy in her voice. “Whatever.”

He couldn’t take it anymore. Dropping a can of coffee onto the counter, he slapped his palms down on either side of it and leaned in.

“Ya know, everytime I see you, you’ve got something snarky to say.”

Her eyes went wide. “Snarky?” She frowned. “I thought I was flirting.”

The fight drained out of him along with the blood in his cheeks. Confused once more. “Uh… what?”

Pushing herself up off the stool, she mirrored his pose, hands falling dangerously close to his. “Flirting,” she said again. “It’s an ancient ritual in which a sexually interested party attempts to lure their prey into bed with witty and charming wordplay.”

He balked. “I know what flirting is!”

She glared. “Then why haven’t you picked up on the fact that I’ve been trying to pick you up for weeks now?”

“I uh…” His elbows buckled and he stood up fully. “You have?” No way. She wasn’t…

Memories of the past month flooded his mind. Each time he’d seen her she was smiling at him, not being snarky. She was teasing him, answering the ridiculous sayings on his shirt.

‘I sell crack for the CIA.’ … “I hope you overcharge them”

‘Surf naked.’ … “I always do.”

‘Orgasm Donor - Ask for your free sample’ … “As soon as I get my free sample.”

It had been smacking him in the damned face and he hadn’t seen it. She had been playing with him the whole time, not trying to annoy him. She wanted him to notice her, but he was too busy dreaming of Tish, wondering when she’d notice him.

He sucked in a stunned breath. “You have. Wow.”

A tiny smile returned to her cherry lips. “Come on, I know you’re not as dumb as your fashion sense implies.”

Priestly felt a dip in his gut, something fluttering around inside. He grinned. “Oh, I’m way dumber.”

Reaching across the counter, she grabbed hold of his shirt and pulled him close. “Good.”

Her lips were soft, the kiss as sweet as the candy she was always eating. He breathed her in as her tongue swept over his. He was stunned, confused but in a good way. Maybe he needed to push Tish aside and pay more attention to the world around him. Maybe this was a good thing. A really good thing. His eyebrows raised in surprise, his blood pressure raised even higher.

She pulled away slowly, her lips lingering on his.

“You get it now?”

She waited, blinking at him with the most beautiful eyes he’d ever seen. He should have looked sooner, closer; should have given her a chance.

“Yeah,” he whispered in a laugh. “I think I do.”

Another kiss, a press of her hand at the nape of his neck.

“You ever gonna tell me your name?”

She smiled. “Y/N.”

He reached for her cheek; fingers landing lightly on her soft skin.

“Nice to meet you, Y/N.”

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#ten inch hero #fanfiction #priestly x reader #boaz priestly x reader #fluff #jacklesversebingo23

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calamity-unlocked · 1 year

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Sometimes your zip line park isn't doing well and you have a shift of 4 hours without any people so instead you sit in a tree and write fanfiction on your phone.

Anyways this little thing is based on @manitapaleta 's GORGEOUS art piece, link here if you haven't been graced with it yet.

841 words - Nark

CWs: mentions of boldily harm, blood, injury

The touch of Lark’s hand was cold on Nick’s face, methodical in the way it moved, but lingering every so often, causing Nick’s breath to catch in his throat.

They were quiet, Lark focused on his task, Nick focused on trying not to wince.

Were the circumstances different, they’d probably be screaming at each other until their throats were torn raw. But Lark was apparently concussed – how he’d managed to achieve that he had refused to disclose – and Nick’s sympathetic nervous system still hadn’t completely calmed down after a full minute of believing his son was dead and then reliving multiple traumas at the same time.

Neither of them were at their best right now, and wanted to prevent getting into a fight that was sure to dredge up painful memories they’d both rather leave locked away alongside the skeletons in their closets. There was plenty of time for fighting later. Right now, the soft, tentative silence between them was being held in place with a mixture of bone-aching tiredness, the desire to keep their children safe, and an all-consuming hatred for Willy Stampler which made their personal feuds pale in comparison.

Willy was still out there. In their fight, Nick had wounded the bastard enough that afterward his semi-light-hearted ‘you should see the other guy’ hadn’t fallen flat. Lark, bleeding from his face and about as talkative as a gravestone, got stuck on demon-sitting duty while the others were chasing Willy, trying to make sure he didn’t get away.

Lark had gruffly asked if Nick was okay with him treating the wounds Willy’s magic knife had caused, seeing how Nick wouldn’t do a great job at it in his armless state. Why he’d offered, Nick couldn’t fathom. Why Nick had accepted was even more of a mystery.

Now, after his arm had been reattached and he’d regained a bit of agency, Nick’s gaze trailed over Lark’s toned arms which were so steadily tending to his face, to the look in his eyes that was too concentrated to be tender, but nevertheless devoid of the burning tenacity that used to always be present there.

Okay. So maybe it wasn’t that much of a mystery.

Nick was holding a bloodied cloth rag he’d previously used to keep pressure on the cut, gripping it tight like a stress ball, betraying how tense he was. He was shirtless and vulnerable, and he shouldn’t trust the man who’d loved him and betrayed him, but for some reason, he did.

Lark had cleaned the long cut running diagonally over Nick’s left cheek, and was now gently applying a layer of antiseptic cream that smelled vaguely like cranberries.

“‘S probably gonna scar,” Lark mumbled, sounding as tired as Nick felt.

“Figures,” Nick said, trying to make his tone light. “Fate’s really trying to turn me into a full-on action hero.”

“Fate’s a bitch.”

“Yeah.”

Lark pulled his shoulders back a bit when he seemed done with the scream, but not his hand. His fingers lingered on the line of Nick’s jaw and he applied a tiny bit of pressure, like a barber moving his head to see the final result. His thumb brushed over Nick’s lips – accidentally? On purpose?

Whatever the intention, Nick’s breath went shallow. Every inch of his bare skin felt hyper-exposed.

Lark’s focus was still on the lower side of Nick’s face, specifically on his lips, as though those also needed his soft-touched care– nope. Cut that thought, Nicky, bad idea. Don’t go there.

The thing was, Nick was pretty sure he could.

He could lean in. He could lean in and close his eyes and pretend that they had both forgotten the past ten years, ignoring how those lonely years had fundamentally changed them as people. He could throw caution and sensibility to the wind, just to feel that spark again.

He wouldn’t. But he could.

He wanted to.

Lark looked up at him, finally. Hesitance and regret swirled in those dark-brown pools, or maybe that was just Nick’s hopeful imagination. He didn’t remove his hand. His thumb stilled on the corner of Nick’s mouth, while his other fingers had trailed down to his neck. His heartbeat pulsed against Lark’s pinkie, betraying the way his body was reacting to their closeness much in the same way as how Lark had seemed to stop breathing altogether.

“Nicky, I…” Lark started.

The door of the med bay slammed open, startling both of them.

“He fucking got away,” Grant sighed, the others coming in behind him, looking bruised but not too worse for wear.

“Shit,” Lark cursed, the hand that had been on Nick’s face a few seconds ago clenching into a fist. The familiar ice-cold determination that left no space for warmth returned to the look in his eyes, and he abruptly stood up and joined the others, muttering in hushed tones about their next course of action.

Nick remained seated on the bench, trying frantically to get his heartbeat under control again, biting the inside of his cheek so hard he tasted iron.

Fuck.

#dndads #nark #nark nation #calamity's writing #lets see if this stays up this time #thanks eri for rbing the art #i totally would have forgotten to post this otherwise

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j2spntranscripts · 20 days

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★ 2007 Chicon J2

Official name: Creation Entertainment's SALUTE TO SUPERNATURAL, SMALLVILLE AND BUFFY/ANGEL Location: Hyatt Regency Woodfield, Chicago, Illinois Time: Sunday November 11, 2007, ?10:40? am (GMT-6) Panelists: Jared Padalecki, Jensen Ackles Last episode: 3x06 "Red Sky at Morning" Nov 8, 2007 Next episode: 3x07 "Fresh Blood" - Nov 15, 2007

Question Index: 1A- Fav role 1B- Ten Inch Hero Distribution; Mohawk 1C- Fav episode so far 1D- Texan Accent request 2A- Blue Steel request 2B- Sam's s3 motivation 3A- Jared's car 3B- Greatest Fear 4- Pranking (Frederic Lehne, Jim Beaver) 5A- Influence for Sam and Dean's dynamic 5B- Fanfiction Int- Fraud Kevin Lawdermilk 6A- Jensen on "EL Paso" by Marty Robbins 6B- BUABS 2x14; Sam vs Meg's Latin accent 6C- Spanish Speaking (Jared) 7A- Fan gift; crochet wear 7B- Request for JDM's number 7C- Sam vs Jack Bauer; Dean vs Jack Bauer

(video playlist/links and transcript below the cut)

(*if you notice any mistakes in the video transcripts or found more video coverage of the con please point them out thanks*👍) (*tumblr doesn't like dailymotion vids so I can only hyperlink them*)

[click here]- jared_cc3 by _sin_attract [click here] - jaredjensen_cc1 by _sin_attract [click here] - jaredjensen_cc2 by _sin_attract [click here] - jaredjensen_cc3 by _sin_attract

◘Jared_cc3 by _sin_attract (17:17)◘ ◘Jensen and Jared at Creation Con 13 by sarahmonious (0:10)◘ ◘ Jensen in Jared shirt by jensenluvx3 (0:12)◘

Jared: I don’t know what it is. Something about the whooole.. half- (circle gestures at Jensen)

Jensen: (sits down and scoots back in his seat) Ah.

Jared: I answered two questions better than you would have. (brushes back bangs and looks around) (audience laughs)

J2 Panel starts.

•Intro- (17:25-SA, 0:16 S, 0:20 J)

Jensen puffs out his chest and looks at his Sam shirt. Jared looks over and notices their height difference is smaller.

Jared: Did they give me a short chair? (audience laughs) Did you ask them to give me a short chair? (audience laughs) How come- (slumps in the chair holding up his mic then sits up kicking up his feet)

◘Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki at Chicago Con… by DegaDreamer◘

Jensen: (smiles then looks at the audience making a circular gesture) It’s all coming together.

Jared: (laughs then turns to Jensen) Hey, do you remember when we did, uh-

Jensen: (looks down at his shirt) This is fantastic.

Jared: “Bedtime Stories” we were walking up the, uh, up the street?

Jensen: (to Jared) I’m not taking this off.

Jared: I wouldn’t either.

Jensen: I’m going to fly on the plane with you, today. (Jared throws back his head, laughs, and then claps. The audience laughs.) And, I’m going to wear this.

Jared: You know you’re opening a.. bad can of worms, Jensen. Don’t go there. Don’t make me ta- Don’t make me show them what’s tattoo on my chest. (audience laughs and screams. Jensen laughs) I wished I had something tattooed on my chest. Sounds good.

◘Chicago Con 2007 - J&J's panel (part 1) by Carol Padalecki◘

Jensen: He does. It’s Ricky Martin.

Jared: It sounds- (facepalms briefly then nods to Jensen) It is.

Audience member: Did you see the red (?bouncy house?)

Jared: La vida Loca. It- Should we? Do it?

Audience member: Jared in his underwear.

Audience member: Your answer to the drunk question even.

Jared: That’s right. They e- exactly! That was- that was my favorite drunk moment of Jensen was, was him tattooing.. Ricky.. Martin.. (audience laughs) on his bon-bon. (audience laughs)

Jensen: It was a low moment. (nods)

Jared: (laughs) (to Jensen) Do you remember when we were walking out to the street in “Bedtime Stories?” (Jensen: No.) We were doing the scene- (laughs) (audience laughs) Did you- Did you finish my line, or did I forget my lines, or we just rushing? Remember there was a toad siting there and we had to-

Jensen: Yes. (audience laughs) And what happened?

Jared: (laughs) I think, that’s why I was asking you.

Jensen: I don’t remember what we did two days ago. (audience laughs)

Jared: (laughs) fair enough. (Jensen: Um-) (to fan) Well, there’s you’re answer. That wasn’t better! (audience laughs and then cheers) (raises arms in victory) (Jensen says something to Jared off mic) (shrugs) She goes, “I think Jensen would answer the question better.” (Jensen laughs then nods) Don’t laugh at that!

◘Jared Padalecki and Jensen Ackles at Chicago Con by BeckyVids◘

Jensen: (shrugs) It’s hilarious (audience laughs) (Jared: (?Really?)) Um, I don’t- I’m trying to r- When we walked up the path and see the frog?

Jared: We walk- we walked up the street and we- we, uh- It was Mike Rohl- It was “Bedtime Stories” (Jensen: Yeah-yeah.) Where (?new as?) we’re walking up the hill. (Jensen: Right.) And then we had to finish that shot. And it’s like, “Uhh, well it could be a- I think maybe-

Jensen: Oh when you say, (Jared: “I got nothing.”) “I got nothing.”

Jared: You go, “Yeah. Me neither.” (Jensen: Right) Did you finish my line or were those the actual lines that were just-?

Jensen: Those were the actual lines.

Jared: (to audience) We were acting. (audience laughs)

Jensen: That you- that you butchered. (turns to audience) We were smacking as we like to say.

Jared: We were smacking. (nods) Yeah. That was some smacking. (throws hand up and turns to his left) Okay. That was that. (turns to his right) Where do we go too?

Creation Staff: This side.

Jared: (turns to his left) Alright. (turns back) Thank you (?by proxy?). (giggles)

•(1:43 CP, 0:44 B)- Chicon07J2;Q1A- Fav role

Fan: What timing, I get up to the mic and then they’re both on stage. (audience laughs and then cheers) What timing is that? Come on.

Jensen: I can leave. (audience laughs and no’s)

Jared: Woo! (puts down mic) I (?didn’t do?) that. (audience laughs) (?Tonight on broad?) (giggles)

Fan: kay, actually a question for both of you. (Jared: Okay.) First one you can both answer. Um, of all the roles you guys have done what was your favorite and why?

Jared: Oo. I mean the obvious is. Sam.-

Jensen: I can answer for him. Sam (readjusts his seat) because he gets to work with Jensen Ackles. (audience laughs and cheers)

Jared: (shrugs) We have this connection (gestures to both of their heads) after two and half years now. He just gets my thoughts and takes ‘em (nods)

Jensen: (shakes head) Don’t even need to look at him. (audience laughs)

Jared: That was that. That was that. I have to say- I mean, the- the amount of things.. Maybe because we done now 55 episodes- Just the amount of- I’ve never worked so hard on anything on my life. And just the amount of things that we’ve been able to do from comedy to drama to.. horror to sci-fi to.. goofing around and.. to sleeping on camera. You know? Like, (audience giggles) I’ve done a few sleeping scenes. That’s interesting. I like that. More of that.

Fan: And the story about pranks too.

Jared: Yeah, the pranks we get to play on each other. So, I would have to go with the obvious and say a big ole Supernatural. (turns to Jensen)…. (turns to the audience) And his is Supernatural because he gets to work with Jared Padalecki. (audience laughs)

Jensen: Obviously. (audience woo’s) Yeah, I-I-I think he said it well. I mean, this, you know, there’s been other- other roles that I’ve wished I had the opportunity to.. dive into as much as I’ve got to-to dive into this one. Uhh, umm, character on Dark Angel I really enjoyed. (audience cheers)

Jared: (rushes out) My character from Gilmore Girls I also really enjoyed. (audience laughs) (looks at Jensen and then giggles)

Jensen: I thought (Jared throws his head back laughing) he was going to say New York Minute. (audience screams and laughs) (Jared kicks his feet laughing and hides behind his hand) (makes a chef kiss gesture) I love that one.

Jared: (scratches his nose with the mic) I’ve got nothing.

Jensen: The sensitivity.

Jared: I’ve got nothing. I’ve got nothing. I accept defeat. (Jensen laughs)

Jensen: (to fan) Ah, yeah. I-I gotta say Supernatural. It’s just simple because the-the amount of time we got- gotten to spend with these roles.. Yep.

•(3:45 CP, 0:44 B)- Chicon07J2;Q1B- Ten Inch Hero; Mohawk

Fan: Um, Jensen I just wanted to tell you I haven’t gotten to see “Ten Inch Hero” yet. (Jensen: Yep) So, when you find a way to distribute it, make sure it’s all around the internet so we can all know.

Jared: I’ll make sure of that. (audience cheers) (nods to Jensen) Hell, yeah.

Jensen: Just go to his blog space or whatever.

Fan: But, um, I saw the photos online and had a cow because they just look so different from what you look like and everything else.

Jensen: Yeah that was fun. That was- that was-

Fan: I enjoyed it. (?And that sort of kick me like?) when I clicked on the photo and… “Wow” (giggles) (Jensen looks down pressing his lips together and smacks his leg) (audience laughs) I enjoyed it.

Jensen: Good times. They actually- they-they.. They know- They wanted a mohawk and, uh, they actually tested the extensions in my hair. They were going to make it like a-a, you know, a foot tall mohawk.

◘jensen by jjc7384◘

Jared: Did you have to take out your actual extensions?

Jensen: Yes. (audience laughs) Yes. Um, and I was just like, (Jared snorts to himself) my hair grew.. (throws up hand) just grew, uh, fast enough to- by the time production was ready it was- it was long enough to do that. (Jared nods and face shrugs) So, I was so glad I didn’t have to- to wear those things. But, uh, yeah that was- that was always the look of the character. So they just-

Jared: Yeah it sucks to have really long hair, huh? (Jensen: yeah) All the time. (audience laughs) Like when you can’t see past your eyeballs? (moves his bangs infront of his face)

Jensen: I don’t envy you.

Jared: Yeah, sure. (to fan) Alright, sorry. (audience chuckles)

•(4:56 CP, 0:27 jj)- Chicon07J2;Q1C- fav episode

Fan: I just have one other question and then a request. The other question is, what’s your favorite episode so far?

Jared: …hmm. (looks away in thought)

The boys turn to look at each other for a moment. The audience laughs. Jensen looks down.

Jared: (looks back to the audience) crickets. (audience laughs and Jensen smiles) (to fan) Not- not, “Bugs.”

◘jaredjensen_cc1 by _sin_attract◘

Um, (audience aw’s and laughs) You know what, I actually, um, I don’t know if this is my favorite episode so far, but I really, really, really enjoyed episode 2 of this year, “The Kids Are Alright,” with the (gestures to his face) suck holes (jensen nods audience cheers and claps) and the whole (?suckie thingies?). And I watched it and I also, um, because there’s certain episodes that are Sam heavy and certain episodes that are Dean heavy. And, since that one was Dean heavy, I got to watch it almost as a complete audience member. Like, I didn’t remem- I wasn’t there for a lot of the shooting. I didn’t see a lot of it. I didn’t really know the.. story as well as I.. maybe should have. (laughs) (audience laughs) And so, I got to watch it as an audience member. And I- I was- (shrugs) I was scared, I was laughing, I was really happy with, uh, his performance. For the first time in 50 episodes really. (audience laughs) That’s a whole other situation.

But I-I really, really- (Jensen gives a short nod) And I told Phil, who was directing the episode right now and who directed that episode, (Jensen smirks and then drinks his water) that I really enjoyed that episode. I’ve liked all of his, you know. He did “Nightshifter,” and he did “Hollywood Babylon,” and “Provenance.” (nods) He’s done some good ones. So, that’s my most recent favorite. (turns to Jensen)

Jensen: Umm, ch-ch-ch-ch-ch, (clicks tongue) I don’t know, I kind of like, the, uh, I know it’s a two parter, but, uh, in the last season, uh-um, (?Jared: Jimmy Gordon?) “All Hell Breaks Loose, part 1 and part 2” (Jared: [nods] Oh yeah.) (Audience yeah’s) Just the, uh, (shakes head) I just like the, you know, the- (points at a fan in the audience) he’s going nuts- She is going nuts with this (?camcorder?) (audience laughs. Jared smiles)

Jared: Is it still working?

Jensen: It’s just (mimics winding) winding and winding and winding (audience laughs) and winding.

Jared: It’s going to be the best flipbook of all time.

Jensen: Ever. (audience laughs)

Jared: (to fan) Make sure you stay this way (gestures to face) you don’t want to get- (gestures to Jensen) (audience laughs) (smiles) That’s good.

Jensen: (sits up and gestures back and forth to his shirt and Jared) Well, this way you get two of him (audience laughs)

Jared: (?You’re correct?) (helps Jensen straighten out the picture on his shirt) (?Come on, that says something?)

Jensen: (looks at his shirt) It’s fantastic. (points at one of the Jareds on his shirt) You guys ready to see this one? Here we go. (mimics Jared’s brooding concerned face)

Jared throws his head and kicks back to laugh. The audience screams and laughs. Then Jared makes a squinty blue steel face.

Jensen: (holds up a finger) I might be able to do this one. (points at the other Jared on his shirt) Let me.

Jensen takes a minute and then looks up. The audience laughs. Jared laughs and looks up at the banners (I guess for a Jensen face to mimic) and then lays back down laughing to himself. Jensen is already making another face.

Jared: You’re good. You’re good. (Jensen looks towards Jared laughing. Jared laughs back) I need a Jensen shirt. Anybody got one I can borrow? I’ll get me one.

Jensen: There’s one back stage. I autographed it for you. (smoothly drinks his water) (Audience laughs. Jared smirks and then pumps his fist. Audience woo’s.)

Jared: Ebay! (to Jensen) straight to Ebay. (laughs to himself) I could let Harley wear it. (Jensen: Um,) or Sadie.

Jensen: (to fan) I think we answered your question.

Jared: (turns immediately back to the fan) I thinks so, right?

Jensen: (shakes his head and laughs looking down) I’m just kidding. (audience laughs)

Fan: I’m sorry. Um-

Jensen: No, no, no. You had a request.

•(7:40 CP, 2:30 SA)- Chicon07J2;Q1D- Texan Accent

Fan: Yes, Samantha Herr, uh, Ferris during her Q&A said that at the end of the week when you guys are really tired you’re accent slips. (audience yells things) (?) You can just hear it.

◘Jared and Jensen Interview by DegaDreamer◘

Jensen: (to audience) It did during what?

Jared: (to audience) Did it? (audience yells out words with a drawl)

Jensen: Yeah, well, you know, (slow draw) the characters are from Kansas.

◘Jensen & Jared, TX accen, more, Chicago Con Nov 07 by Clarity159◘

Jared: (to Jensen) Yeah (nods) (to audience) (slow draw) It can hop out, They’re from Kansas.

◘Jared & Jensen in Chicago: The Texan Accent, Y’all by BabyBlueSteel◘

Jensen: It’s allowed.

Jared: (to fan) You know what it is? It-it- yeah, it-it’ll pop out when we go to visit family (Jensen: Yep) (slow draw) or when it’s tired ‘cause when you just to tired to say anything. (audience cheers and laughs) It’s just lazy. It’s just lazy, lazy talk. And usually (slums down and sprawls in chair) our body language is like this (slow draw) “Are you sure you want me to go and do stuff? I got film, man.” (audience laughs) (chuckles)

Jensen: (slow draw) (slumps in his chair and rubs his eyes with the back on his hand) “Hey man, there-there flippin’ the lids on this scene. I’m gonna back to my trailer.” (audience laughs)

Jared: (clears throat) (slow draw) “How long you think, you reckon?”

Jensen: “Shoot, I don’t know.” (audience laughs)

Jared: “What? Five, Ten?”

Jensen: “Somethin’”

Jared: (?Would’ve you got-?) “Maybe it’ll be done in a (losing accent) New York Minnute?” (Grimaces then hides behind his mic) (Jensen shakes his head. Audience laughs)

Jensen: (to fan) Thank you.

Fan: Thank you, so much, guys. Thank you, guys. Have a wonderful weekend. (Jensen turns to his left)

Jared: (to fan) Thank you too. Thank you so much. (claps leg) (audience claps and cheers) (does a back and forth for a little bit then settles on look to his left)

Jensen: (to fan) Hi.

◘Chicago Con 2007- J&J’s panel (part 2) by Carol Padalecki◘

•(3:54 SA, 1:05 C, 0:02 CP)- Chicon07J2;Q2A- Blue Steel Request

Fan: Hi. I don’t actually want to sound like a shtick, but, my name is Sarah and it’s actually my birthday today. So, thank you guys (Jared: Is it?) so much. This has been (Audience member: Sing!) tremendous to see you guys.

Audience member: Let’s sing Happy Birthday!

Jared: Happy birthday.

Audience member: Let’s sing it!

Jared: And it’s not my birthday today. But I’m Sam- Jared! (grimaces) (audience screams and laughs) Now I’m Sam. (leans forward with a squinty face) (audience laughs) (looks down laughing to himself)

Jensen: (shakes head) I mean- I don’t even need to go there. (audience laughs) (starts twisting his empty water bottle)

Fan: I actually, um, kind of got up when it was Jared, so no offense Jensen. I have a request and a question-

Jensen twists the bottle and then squeezes the top half. The bottle’s lid pops off high in the air. Everybody watches it go up and then down. The audience squeals and laughs.

Jared: There are probably 4,000 poor bottles in Vancouver that.. have that done to them. (audience laughs) (nods) On behalf on the two biggest Texans in Vancouver right now.

Jensen: I’m-I’m sorry.

Fan: No, that’s okay. Um, I did kind of have a request. Um, I kind of wanted to see “Blue Steel.”

The audience squeals. Jensen turns to look at Jared. Jared slowly turns away and then uses the chair arms as support to whip his head back towards the fan making a puckered “Blue Steel” face. Jensen covers his face with his hand. Jared turns his “Blue Steel” towards the audience, shaking his head to get his bangs out of his face. The audience screams. Jensen then does little peeks to see if it’s okay to look at Jared again.

◘Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki at Chicago Con… by DegaDreamer◘ ◘Jared & Jensen in Chicago: Blue Steel & Baby Blue Steel by BabyBlueSteel◘

Jared: (stops) Wait, did you want to see that or did you want me to impersonate-

Jensen: I had to avert my eyes. (Jared and audience laugh)

Jared: You can go blind. (nods) You can go blind. So. Once you do it once it’s gone.

Jensen: I can’t- (shakes head) You almo- I almost fell off my chair-

Jared: (Texan draw) Go on get some (stares at Jensen) (Jensen turns to look at Jared) That wasn’t a singular request. (to audience nodding) Right? We got to see Jensen’s. (audience claps and cheers) We’re calling him “Baby Blue Steel.” (J2 and audience laugh)

Jensen: I didn’t even get a good look at yours. Could you- you just one more time? Just a little- a little face?

Jared: Oh, it’s done. It’s done. I already did it. (audience yelling at them to do it together)

Jensen: (shrugs to fan and shakes his head) That’s enough. I- I mean, really? (Jared laughs) You can’t follow that.

Jared: (to fan) You can’t- (nods) To his credit, you can’t follow that.

Jensen: (to fan) No. (audience laughs and some yell at them to do it at the same time) I can’t do it. I can’t. (notices the cameras) Look at all the cameras (?rising up?).

◘Jared and Jensen q&a’s by augustfading◘

Jared: I know! (audience laughs)

Jensen: (mimics audience) “Do it at the same time!” (sits up and mimics raising up a camera) “I dare you!” (audience and Jared laughs) (sits back) I ain’t fallin’ for that one.

Jared: (to Jensen) We’re going to have four thousand angles of Blue Steel (laughs)

Jensen: Yes (audience laughs) It’s like a CGI, just like the full rotation.

Jared: Just like the Matrix.

•(6:02 SA, 3:13 C, 2:10 CP, 1:11 DD, 0:21 A)- Chicon07J2;Q2B- BUABS; Sam’s s3 motivation

Fan: I did have a question besides the “Blue Steel” request.

Jensen: Okay, yes. Wha-what was your question?

Fan: Um, just cause you hear it a lot from actors and we heard it yesterday from Fred Lehne about how awesome it is to-to play the bad ass, and really Jared, um, you know, Born Under A Bad Sign-

Jared: Well, I’m not playing sweetie.

The audience laughs then cheers. Jensen turns to give him an assessing look. Jared makes a blue steel face to the audience with puckered lips and squinty eyes. Finally Jared turns to Jensen and notices his look. Jared laughs. Jensen shakes his head, pumps his eyebrows, and then turns to the fan and laughs.

Jared: Haa, I’m here all week. Try the veal. (laughs)

Fan: And then in season two you said you’re trying to bring out the Dean in Sam. (Jared: Right) Is it also to- trying to get that question in of whether or not he came back right?

Jared: Kind of. And I- a- (raises hand) And the god-honest truth is I don’t know. Eric keeps it very, very close to the belt. (Jensen nods) And I think it’s- I’ve said it before. I think it’s by design. I think he- I think he wants Jared and Jensen to be going through the same things that Sam and Dean are going through. Like we- (gestures to Jensen) Sam and Dean don’t know what’s going on after this episode. They don’t know where they’re going next. (Jensen nods) Jared and Jensen don’t know. (slow draw) We think there’s a strike or something, but (audience laughs. Jensen nods and smiles) I don’t know. (Jensen briefly looks up)

But, um, it was an effort and also there have been some, uh- Sam has actually said a few times this season that he kind of needs to become more like Dean. (Jensen nods) That he’s got to become more like Dean. So, I-I’m sort of trying to make a choice, um, and we’ll see.. what becomes of it to.. sort of.. bring out the.. hard ass a bit more. (nods) You know?

And we see him- we see him in, uh- We see him in “Sin City” sort of shoot first ask questions later. Which you’ve never really seen before out of Sam. Um, so, it’s sort of fun. It’s fun to start playing that.

Fan: And it’s very good. (?You’re doing well playing that.?)

Jared: Thank you. Thank you so much.

Fan: Thank you very much.

Jared: Of course. (audience claps) (turns to his right)

•(7:43 SA, 4:53 C, 3:50 CP)- Chicon07J2;Q3A- Jared's car

Jared: Hi!

Fan: Um, Jensen I have to say that, uh, “A Few Good Men,” this summer (Jared nods) was absolutely amazing. (Jensen: Thank you.) I loved every bit of it. (Jared and audience clap) Jared, uh- Well, my friend has a question, which you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.

Jared: (laughs) okay! (audience laughs) I’m nervous already. (audience laughs)

Fan: She wants to know what kind of car you drive?

Jared: Oh, I have a- I have a SUV ‘cause I’ve got my two big dogs. So, I’ve a- I have a black SUV that.. carries safely me and my two dogs and.. a friend or girlfriend to Vancouver and back. (audience chuckles) If, uh, (nods) if need be. (nods)

•(8:13 SA, 5:24 C, 4:21 CP)- Chicon07J2;Q3B- Greatest Fear

Fan: And, question from me. Uh, since this show is about- mostly about scary, uh, what is your greatest fear, both of you?

Jared: What is my scariest experience?

Fan: Your greatest fear.

Jared: Oh, my greatest fear. Um, one question ago was what that question was going to be. (Jensen face shrugs. Audience laughs. Jensen nods) Probably.. probably waking up and seeing that poster (points to creation’s vinyl wall scroll of Jensen) of Jensen. (audience laughs) (laughs) Would be- would be a bit too much to bare.

Jensen: (to Jared) We could arrange that. (audience and Jared laugh)

Jared: Yeah, you would.

Jensen: (pumps his eyebrows) Hell, yeah. (audience laughs. Jared chuckles)

Jared: Um-

Jensen: (to Jared) What is your greatest fear, Jared?

Jared: Uh- uh, that’s a very good question. Um, I-I’d have to say, uh..

Audience member: Being without Jensen.

The audience laughs and then aw’s. Jared nods his head and slumps down in his chair in mock sadness. Jared creeps over to hug Jensen. The audience laughs and aw’s. Jared snaps back to his side before making contact. J2 smile.

Jared: I’d have to say, uh, the obvious you know. Uh, like, losing a loved one or- or, you know, you-you- One of the things Vancouver does- And he and I are both from Texas, and our family is in Texas. And you just, you know, every time you have three missed phone calls from a brother or sister you’re worried it’s about, you know, someone.. that you didn’t get a chance t-to see again. But, (slaps leg and then nods) (audience aw’s) And Jensen’s is being without me. (audience laughs)

Jensen: (nods) Greatest fear. (nods)

Fan: Well, thank you guys.

Jared & Jensen: Thank you. (Jared turns to his left. Jensen follows)

•(9:51 SA, 6:00 CP)- Chicon07J2;Q4- Pranking (Frederic Lehne, Jim Beaver)

Fan: Hi, um-

Jensen: Hi.

Fan: I was wondering, yesterday Frederic Lehne said that you two have never pranked him that he can recall. Why is that?

Jared: Oh.

Jensen: Have never what?

Fan: Pranked him.

◘Jared & Jensen in Chicago: Why they didn’t prank Frederic by BabyBlueSteel◘

Jared: ‘Cause he-

Jensen: ‘Cause he’s the bad guy. (audience laughs)

Jared: Yeah. Fred’s kind of like very-

Jensen: Fred’s got like those yellow (points at eyes) contacts in all the time. And it’s just like (crouches down and doesn’t make eye contact) “Hey, Fred. How you doing?” (mimics shaking his hand) (audience laughs) Um-

Jared: You know what? He, uh- He knows Bob Singer real well, the producer. (Jensen laughs) And, um, Bob Singer is also one of the writers. I guess he can’t write anything. I guess now it’s done. (audience laughs) Now that he can’t write.

Jensen: Well Fred’s a-

Jared: Sam wakes up in a puddle of mud.. in December, “Ah!” (audience laughs)

Jensen: Fred’s- Fred’s also, uh- I mean, he’s a- he’s a-a very seasoned polished.. professional (Jared: Right.) actor. (Jared: He’s right.) Um, unlike us.

Jared: So he knows many more pranks than we do. (laughs) (audience laughs)

Jensen: So, he comes on this set, and so you know, he’s there- he’s there to get a job done. He’s- he kind of brings a-an energy in him. And he’s great to work with in all, uh, you know, but he’s.. he’s definitely has a professionalism that follows him into the room. Uhm-

Jared: And you can see it in his performance he’s- he’s brilliant.

Jensen: Yes! He’s great, um, where as you know, Jared and I tend to-

Jared: two chicken’s with their head’s cut off. (audience laughs)

Jensen: (nods) Pretty much. (nods to fan) Pretty much. Um, we have started to, uh, we have started messing with, uh, Jim.

Jared: Yeah. (audience aw’s and oo’s) Yeah. (to audience) We love Jim. (audience yeah’s and claps) We love Jim. A lot. (?He rocks?)

Jensen: The Beef.

Jared: The Beef. He does love beef.

Jensen: Um-

Jared: But, with Jim and with Fred both, I think… though I hate to admit it, it’s, like he said, they’re polished seasoned actors. And they’ve been around pranks a lot longer. I’ve only been professionally working for eight years now, they’ve each been doing it for thirty so years. So, (laughs)

Jensen: Well all I knew- I knew-

Jared: I don’t know what they know that I don’t know. (audience laughs)

Jensen: Jim, uh, we- we had this scene we filmed just recently we, uh- uh, Jim is, uh, I won’t give anything away, was laying in a hospital bed. Um, (Jared remembers and bursts out laughing. Audience laughs) And he dies. (audience laughs and no’s) Um- No. No. No. (waves hand) I’m kidding. I’m kidding. He doesn’t. He doesn’t. He doesn’t.

Um, but, (Jared laughs) but in the scene he’s talking to us and, uh, (Jared throws his head back laughing. Audience laughs) on his coverage Jared is just grabbing his toes. (Jared kicks his feet laughing. Audience laughs) And staring at him and playing.. the- (looks to Jared) w-what is it? (to audience) Playing "This Little Piggy Goes to the Market" with his toes.

And I’m standing there right there looking at him going, “Are you serious?” (audience laughs) “He’s trying to give a heart felt, like, performance right now.” (Jared throws his head back and laughs) The camera’s are like here (gestures to his right). And Jared’s like going (leaning left with a dorky smile, mimicking playing with Jim’s toes) (audience laughs)

Jared: He has toes of steel that man. He did not budge.

Jensen: He didn’t break.

Jared: He didn’t budge.

Jensen: He didn’t break. His face was stone, and he delivered that performance and then as soon as they yelled cut he goes, “What’s wrong with you?” (Jared and the audience laugh) (nods smiling)

Jared: I couldn’t answer, I don’t know.

Jensen: (to Jared) You fell out of the room laughing.

Jared: Yeah, I was laughing too hard.

Jensen: “What’s wrong with you?” (slaps leg) Gotta love the Beef.

Jared: I was quite impressed. That means I have to up my game, right? (Jensen nods. audience laughs) Yeah. (nods)

Fan: Okay, well thank you for coming.

◘Chicago Con 2007 - J&J's panel (part 3) by Carol Padalecki◘

Jared: Thank you.

Jensen: Thank you. (J2 turn to their left)

•(12:53 SA, 0:02 CP)- Chicon07J2;Q5A- Influence for Sam and Dean's dynamic

Fan: Hi.

Jared: Hi.

Jensen: Hey.

Fan: Um, obviously family is a big part of the show. And it’s, uh, important thing on the show and that’s, uh, part of what drew me is the relationship between the brothers and my relationship with my brother a lot of the time.

Jared: Oh, cool.

Fan: So, did you two- did you- I know you have a real brother and sister in real life, so do you draw on that? Do you, like, especially in the beginning before you guys know each other as well, did you draw on that to make your relationship as brothers seem more real?

Jared: I mean, we must. (looks at Jensen) Not consciously I don’t think.

Jensen: Well, ush, I was saying earlier, um, I-I-I think in the beginning.. we probably did. But, uh, (Jared nods) now the fact that we, you know, have.. like (to Jared) y-you said it like we-we see more of each other than we do anybody else in the world over the past three years, because (Jared: [nods] Yeah.) of all the time we’ve spent on set.

Um, and then when we’re not on set we’re doing, you know, stuff like this. (gestures to audience) So, (Jared nods) uh, uh-

Jared: Or he is out my- outside my window, knocking.

Jensen: Or I’m knocking on his window. (audience laughs) And, um- So I think just the- just the- the.. kind of the established relationship that- that’s.. you know, happened here has, has given us kind of what we need to.. (waves hand) go into a scene or delve into an emotional scene.

Jared: Right.

•(1:09 CP)- Chicon07J2;Q5B- Fanfiction

Fan: And also there’s kind of a ton of fanfiction online. (audience groans) Do you guys ever read it (?)

Jensen: the operative word is “fiction” (audience and Jared laughs, then audience cheers and claps)

◘jaredjensen_cc2 by _sin_attract ◘

Jared: I haven’t seen a lot of it. Uh, I haven’t- I haven’t- I actually can’t recall.. not for any particular reason, but um, I can’t recall seeing anything of that sort. Like, I don’t even know the actual next episode, so (laughs) I don’t think I have- you know, if I start thinking about fanfiction I’m going to be like, getting prepared to play this scene and go, “Wait a second, I’m not actually doing that (?at all?).” (audience laughs) “Someone else wrote that, not Kripke.”

And, um- but I’ve never had a chance to see it all. I hope it’s good. (audience laugh and one cheers) (thumbs up)

Fan: You guys are great. Thanks for coming.

Jared: Thank you.

Jensen: Thank you. (turns to his left and Jared follows)

•(1:54 CP, 0:37 SA)- Chicon07J2;Intermission- Fraud Kevin Lawdermilk

“Kevin Wise aka Keavin Lawdermilk is the fake Special Forces Soldier Master Sergeant, who gave Jensen and Jared Honorary Special Forces coins and a letter of appreciation at the Salute to Supernatural Chicago 2007. […] In April 2008, the Supernatural Charity group Fandom Rocks, obtained permission to get two real Special Forces coins to Jared and Jensen. They were presented to them by Jim Beaver, who was himself a Marine.”

[source]

Creation Staff: Uh, guys we have a (Jared: [looks up] God?) special surprise for yah right now. We’re gonna bring out a Master Sargent Kevin Wise of the, uh, first special forces out of Baghdad. (Jensen starts miming to someone off stage about a small square that you can hold, possibly located in another room) Who has a very wonderful presentation from the US military. (audience claps and cheers)

J2 stand up and move their chairs out of the way. Lawdermilk steps up on stage wearing a fake military uniform with a green beret, holding a mic and a folded piece of paper. He greets J2 shaking their hands. Kevin says something off mic to Jensen and Jensen laughs and then pats his back.

Lawdermilk: (to the audience) Twenty-four hours ago, I was in Baghdad. Now I’m in the- the greatest county on Earth. (audience cheers, J2 claps, the audience starts giving a standing ovation) (nods)

Jensen: I feel like a total idiot standing here with a Sam Winchester t-shirt on. (thumbs to Lawdermilk) (audience laughs)

Lawdermilk: First- first, let me say, um, happy Veterans Day. (audience claps and woo’s) (nods yep) We are the military we are today because of all the former veterans, past and present. (Jensen nods. Audience claps. Jared claps his mic.)

Many have seen yah- I’ve been walking around and you’re probably wondering why I’m walking around- (looks down at his clothes) strange walking around in uniform. And we just got back. We left Baghdad Friday about nine o’ clock. And we’ve been flying. Uh, we got to go back next week. Uhm, So I wanted to come in and say hello to the guys and, ah- While I was over there Supernatural season 1 and 2 is the most popular DVD request for our soldiers in (?Afghanistan?) (audience screams and claps) (J2 nod and shake their heads in surprise)

And thanks to Warner Brothers and your- (gestures to J2) y’all’s production company they’re going to send 3,000 of season 1 and 2 over to (?) (audience cheers and claps).

Well, I’ve been walking around (?over here?)- Over there, there are some troops that haven’t been home and maybe they’ve seen a little season one, maybe a little season- I’ve seen a little season two. So, I’ve been TVOing season 3. (J2 and audience laugh) So, I’ll- I’ve been hearing (points to the audience) the- the stories. I’ve been trying to close my ears (audience and J2 laugh) because I don’t want to know (?what’s gonna happen?)

And, uh- But, these two gentlemen here is what makes that show, their cast and their crew that works hard, is what makes that show so (?damn good?). (audience cheers and claps)

I’d also like to thank Adam Malin and Gary with, uh, Creation Entertainment. (J2 nod) And, y’all- mostly y’all of- (gestures) I’ve seen y’all taking the pictures and met Chris the photographer. (audience woo) I, uh, I met them about two years ago. I was home. I-I had been shot, and, um, from Iraq. And, I was still walking with a cane. And, they- I was at one of their conventions and they helped me out. And, I’m proud to say that they’ve been friends ever since. So, (nods) thank you (?). (audience and J2 clap)

(to J2) Gentlemen, I have a letter from my boss, um, General Patraeus. (audience mummers) His- his boss is the president, so. (audience laughs) They’re both- they’re both the same, so I’m just going to read you just the one. But, they’re both the same with just you’re names on them and, um.

“To Mister Jared.. Padalecki? (Jared nods, Jensen nods and smiles, audience laughs) and Mister Jensen Ackles, Everyday in Iraq and Afghanistan, our military service members are constantly in harms way. At any moment they can be severely injured or even killed. They are under- constantly under pressure- pressure and stress. For that short time when they can sit and relax and watch your television show, “Supernatural” gives each of them the opportunity to forget about the constant stress and pressure they deal with on a daily basis. Our favorite television shows remind us of family, friends, and home. I would like to thank the entire cast and crew that makes “Supernatural” one of the most popular shows with our military service members. On behalf of every military service member who’s deployed in Iraq and Afghanistan and worldwide, I would like to express my gratitude for your continued support of all of our military service members. Best of luck to your future endeavors, David H Petraeus, General United States Command”

The audience claps and cheers. Lawdermilk shakes J2’s hands and hands them each their letter that’s held in a hole punched clear plastic sleeve and says something to Jensen off mic. Jensen nods his head. Lawdermilk makes another comment off mic and then backs away while pointing at J2. Jared tries to say something in the mic but it’s drowned out. Lawdermilk holds up two black boxes in his hands in response. The audience cheers and some of them give a standing ovation.

Lawdermilk: In- I’ve been a soldier for 27 years. I’ve been a Special Forces for 17. Back in 1960, we started a little tradition. It’s called a Special Forces Coins that only goes out- there’s only two ways to obtain one of our coins. You become a Green Beret or a Green Beret gives you one.

We very seldom give out coins. They- It has- (Jensen shakes his head and audience aw’s) (laughs) It has to be highly- highly deserved, and very seldom to civilians. So, (nods) I wanted to present mis- uh- I’ll just call him Jared if you don’t, (?Jeremy?) (laughs) (audience laughs, Jared bends over laughing, and Jensen smiles)

Jared: Call me whatever you like.

Lawdermilk: And Jensen with, uh.. with our, um.. Each coin is unique. Each coin we have five active special forces groups. Each coin is unique to each group that it- how’s it identifies us. So, we carry ‘em all- all the time with us. We never- We’re never without ‘em.

So, on behalf of the first Special Forces group (Jensen puts his mic and letter in his seat. Jared follows suit.), my team, which is ODA-045. It’s alpha team. Um, i-I’m from Texas, from Odessa. (audience cheers and claps)

◘Jared & Jensen in Chicago: Honored by a Special Forces Unit by BabyBlueSteel ◘

Jared: (off mic) (nods) alright. (Jensen nods)

Lawdermilk: The team is called- the team is called “Team Texas.”

Jensen tilts his head and then looks at Jared. Jared fist pumps. The audience laughs then cheers. Jensen nods to himself.

Lawdermilk: They are the- They are the hardest- They- they’re the hardest eleven- of course, I make twelve. (audience laughs) They’re the hardest eleven working men out there in uniform today. So, on behalf of my team, in the first Special Forces group in the United States Army, (Jensen shakes his head (opens one box) I’d like to present to you a Special Forces Coin. (reaches over with the open box)

And, this one, you’re name is on it. Here (?) (hands the box to Jared) (the audience wow’s, aw’s, and then claps as Jared receives the box) And yours (leans over to Jensen with the other box) is a different color (?) That’s our special design, and yeah, everything’s on it. (?)

Jared: (off mic) Wow.

J2 shake Lawdermilk’s hand and thank him for the coins. The audience claps and cheers. Lawdermilk goes to say something more but Jared beats him to it.

◘Chicago Con 2007 - J&J's panel (part 4) by Carol Padalecki◘

Jared: (to the audience) Let’s thank him and his men and everybody like him in uniform that’s been sharing the freedom that we’ve had in the states. (puts down his mic and claps) (Jensen and the audience claps and cheers)

Lawdermilk: I know most of you came to.. see these two young men speak instead of some old soldier, but- (audiences nah’s) Uh, I’d like to remind th- we come home and, you know, we have y’alls support, which we all really appreciate.

Audience member: We love you!

Lawdermilk: Thank you. And we come home and, you know, I’ve heard the word hero and heard this, what I like to remind you is, is almost close, we lost six soldiers just the other day in Afghanistan. Um, just over almost four thousand that have been killed in Afghanistan, Iraq, those are the heroes. (audience agrees and claps) (nods) (J2 clap)

(?And if you could give me just a second?), I’d like to invite Mister Adam Malin and Chris photographer here up on stage.

The audience claps. Lawdermilk says something to Jensen off mic and they hold a brief conversation.

Lawdermilk: Like I said, I’m very proud for the last couple of years for these two gentlemen to be called friends. So, we also have a Special Forces coins for both Chris and Adam Malin (?) (J2 and the audience clap)

Creation Entertainment is definitely the best at what they do, you know. And of all you that have taken pictures with Chris, y’all know how good he is. (nods) (audience woo’s and claps) (to J2) I can’t hide my Texas accent, can I?

Jensen: (off mic) Yeah.

Lawdermilk: (opens a box and holds it out) You can tell you’re getting old when you have to hold it up.

The audience laughs. Jensen takes the box to look at the coin. Jared goes around Jensen to take a closer look himself. They exchange boxes because Jared had gotten the wrong one.

Lawdermilk: Okay, that’s the wrong- Adam on behalf of the Special Forces Group and Team Texas, I’d like to present you with this Special Forces Coin.

Adam: (off screen) Thank you so much. (audience claps. And Lawdermilk salutes Adam)

Lawdermilk: (off screen) And Chris, on behalf of the First Special Forces Group and ODA-045 and Team Texas, I present you with yours.

The audience and J2 clap. J2 hold a brief off mic conversation to each other.

Lawdermilk: (to the audience) Thank you very much for your s- for your time and like I said we appreciate your support. Thank you. (audience claps and cheers)

Jensen: (stops Lawdermilk from leaving) Now we give us, uh, (holds a finger to the audience) Give us one minute, we, uh, Jared and I put together a little something here for you, uh, and your men. (Jensen walks across the stage to grab from a handler a box set of Dvd’s. Jared keeps looking at his coin.) Um, it’s the, uh- Well, first we got the season 2 DVD box set for you. So, you could share that with, uh, you and your men.

◘jaredjensen_cc3 by _sin_attract◘

Lawdermilk: (off mic) (?I gots my own. I got someone a gift?)

Jensen: Well then, there you go. (audience chuckles) (grabs the script from behind him) And, uh- and- and this is- this is kind of cool. I’ve actually never seen, uh, one of these given out. This is, uh, Kim Manners’ directors’ script. (audience gasps and oo’s, then claps) It has all of his director’s notes and shot angles and camera things written down inside here. Uh, he keeps that in his binder and that is his bible for the entire, uh, you know, two weeks that he’s-he’s shooting this episode. Um, we’ve all signed it. You’ve got Serge, the DP, you got myself, Jared, uh, Fred, Jim Beaver is on there. You got the two girls this season are on there. Kim obviously signed it, but, uh… you know, I-it’s- it’s not nearly what you gave us, but, uh, I hope you enjoy it. (hands Lawdermilk the script)

Off mic, Lawdermilk thanks them for the script. The audience aw’s and claps and then cheers. Lawdermilk shakes J2’s hands again, then throws a hand up to the audience, says one more goodbye to the boys, and leaves the stage. J2 clap as he leaves.

Adam: Master Sergeant, Kevin Wise. (audience cheers and claps) Thank you, Sir.

Jensen: (looks briefly at Jared and then to the audience) I kind of really don’t know where to go after that. (audience laughs) (to Jared) How do you follow that?

Jared doesn’t answer right away because he’s looking at his gifts again, then looks up shaking his head at Jensen, and then says something off mic.

Jensen: (laughs) (?steel guys?)

Jared: (off mic) Yeah.

Jensen: (takes the card from Jared) Wow. Well that’s kind of neat. That’s not something you see every day. (whistles)

Jared: Understatement of the century. Um.

Jensen: (turns to his chair and then the audience) Where were we? (audience laughs) (Jared exhales and J2 sit down) Alright. (to Jared) That was really special.

Jared: That was very special.

Jensen: Yeah, that was pretty cool. Um, (turns to the creation staff) how much time do we uh..

Adam: (off screen) A couple more questions.

Jensen: (nods) Couple more questions. Okay. Do a few more questions. (points to his right)

◘Chicago Con 2007 - J&J's panel (part 5) by Carol Padalecki◘

Someone off screen: This side.

Jensen: (quickly turns to his left) This side. Here we go. Alright. (audience chuckles)

•(1:51 SA, 0:05 CP)- Chicon07J2;Q6A- Jensen on "EL Paso" by Marty Robbins

Fan: Everybody loves to stand at the (?fidget?) mic and go after that apparently. (audience laughs) So, um, here’s my fangirl question after that. (claps) Congratulations on your coins though.

Jensen: Yes.

Jared: Thank you. Thank you.

Fan: Um, and Jensen you kind of stomped on my- my question earlier, because you answered it without me asking it. (audience chuckles)

Jensen: I’ve been like that.

Fan: (?So really after that?) But, uh- So, uh, recently there was a “Variety,” uh, interview with you and, um, you mentioned three songs that were very important to you? (Jensen: Mhm) And you mentioned, “El Paso” by Marty Robbins. (Jensen: Mhm) And being an El Pasoian born and raised and playing in Marty Robbins Park my whole life.

Jensen: Really?

Fan: Yes. Um, I’m wondering if you would tell us why?

Jensen: Um, that is, uh, one of my father’s favorite songs. And he used to play it a lot, uh, when I was growing up. And, it kind of just- it kind of- there was just something about the song that my Dad and I kind of shared a-a liking for it. And till this day it’s- whenever it comes on I’m like, I-I-I can j-just.. picture myself right there with my dad singing it. So. (nods) (audience aw’s)

Fan: Well feel free to come visit because we’ve got a new golf course (?paved for you?). (audience and Jensen laughs)

Jensen: I gotta take you up on that.

•(2:59 SA, 1:10 CP)- Chicon07J2;Q6B-BUABS 2x14; Sam vs Meg's Latin accent

Fan: (?) Well, it’s real nice. Um, and for Jared. In “Born Under a Bad Sign” when you have to.. Latin-y. (Jared and audience laugh) (Jared: mhm) Your-your, uh, your Latin accent is a little different than when you Latin-y as Sam. It’s a little more fluid.

Jared: Ooh. Oh, you know what?

Fan: Apparently, you had no clue. (audience laugh)

Jared: Uh, I t- uh, w-Which one is more fluid?

Fan: In “Born Under a Bad Sign” when you’re.. when you’re Meg!Sam.

Jared: Good, (fan laughs) that’s what I was hoping for. (audience laughs) It was also partially because that was- it was actually memorized. So, as Sam-

Fan: You don’t memorize the other scenes, you just do it?

Jared: Well, I- as Sam I didn’t, um, I didn’t have it memorized because he had it in the book, and so he was reading it. But, as the demon, it would have been something the demon needed to memorize knowing that, um, there’s a possibility that he’d be put into a devil’s sign.

•(3:50 SA, 2:03 CP)- Chicon07J2;Q6C- Spanish Speaking (Jared)

Fan: Well that kills the- that kills my question. (Jared grimaces. The audience chuckle) Um, I was gonna ask do you speak Spanish at all?

Jared: Um, no. (audience laughs) I mean, I can- I can-

Fan: Can order food?

Jared: I can- Yes. I can find the bathroom. (audience laughs) I can sort of-

Fan: Can you order a beer? That’s what’s important.

Jared: A Cerveza you mean? (turns to the audience) Sí.

Fan: Very good.

Jared: (to fan and nods) Sí.

Fan: Very good. Thank y’all for coming.

Jensen: Thanks. (turns to his right)

Jared: Thank you. Gracias. (audience and Jensen laugh) I mean, (?Latin?) (turns to his right)

•(4:19 SA, 2:31 CP)- Chicon07J2;Q7A- Fan gift; crochet wear

Fan: Hi.

Jensen: Hi.

Fan: I’m Christina.

Jared: Hi Christina.

Jensen: Hi Christina.

Fan: I also want to say this is the best birthday present ever.

Jared: Happy Birthday.

Jensen: Alright. (nods)

Fan: My birthday is on Thanksgiving though, so I’m a little early.

Jensen: Oh, okay.

Jared: Well, happy Thanksgiving Birthday. (audience chuckles)

Fan: Um, I actually- I have a couple questions, um, I actually sent you guys some hats and scarfs that I croqueted and I was just wondering did you got them?

Jared: Those usually take a while to- to get to us.

Fan: I sent them in April. (audience laugh)

Jared: We usually do get- we usually do get things. You send them which?

Fan: in April. (audience laughs)

Jared: Uh, they might-

Fan: Right after Fangoria.

Jared: It goes through- Because, if you remember a few years back there was a big Anthrax scare (Fan: Yeah) at, like, Warner Brothers Lots and stuff. (Jensen nods: Yeah) And so, since then (Fan: It’s exactly.) a lot of- there’s, like, a screening process. And we will get things. (Fan: Okay.) But, a lot of times it’s just it’s just very long.

Fan: If they don’t then I’m sorry

Jared: No. (audience chuckles) Oh, we’re sorry. And, I’m sure they will, but also they come to us, because they- they’ll go to us, and then they’ll go back to LA for the.. screen, and then they’ll come back to us and get distributed-

Jensen: Well, it’s also- It’s- We also have to deal with Customs. Like, (Fan: Yeah) even if you’re shipping anything (Jared: right) it’s-it’s.. (shrugs) Canada. So, they, you know, they’ve got tons of, um, of, you know, border control, uh, screening mail and.. (Fan: Yeah) (nods) Yeah.

•(5:17 SA, 3:28 CP)- Chicon07J2;Q7B- Fan request; JDM’s number

Fan: Okay, uh, (Jared: So, thank you.) my other question, (Jensen: Well, thank you) could I possibly get JDM’s number from you? (audience laughs) (Jensen reaches into his pocket)

Jared: Yeah. Yeah. I, uh- (looks around and then turns towards the screen behind them) Can we just write it in marker up here?

Jensen: I’ll get it out. Yeah. (Jared laughs) Just post it on the wall. (audience laughs)

•(5:28 SA, 3:40 CP)- Chicon07J2;Q7C- Sam vs. Jack Bauer; Dean vs Jack Bauer

Fan: And my next question is, I’ve asked everybody that I’ve gotten a panel with, um, Jared- Sam- Who would win in a fight? Sam or Jack Bauer? (audience laughs)

Jared: Oh. (scrunches up his face) Sam.

Fan: And the same for Dean and Jack Bauer.

Jared: I’d say Sam.

Jensen: Isn’t Kiefer like.. tiny? (audience laughs. Jared nods yeah.)

Fan: Did you see last (Jared: He’s old.) (audience gives mixed reaction) season when he killed somebody by lighting him in the neck?

Jared: Oh, that’s pretty scary. (audience laughs) But, Sam can move things with his mind. (holds up his mic) (audience laughs, cheers, and claps. Jensen shrugs)

◘Jensen & Jared in Chicago: Sam/Dean vs against Jack Bauer by BabyBlueSteel◘

Fan: What about Dean?

Jensen: Um- Ss-

Jared: Sam would save Dean like always. (audience laughs) (grimaces then smirks)

Jensen: Yeah. I wouldn’t have to do anything. (audience chuckles) Um.. (scratches neck) I don’t know. Yeah, I could kick his ass. (Jared laughs. Audience cheers and claps) (shrugs and then smiles)

Fan: Alright, thank you.

Jensen: Thanks.

•Closing - (6:17 SA, 4:28 CP, 0:22 BBS)

Jared: (talking to someone off stage to his right) III believe so. I’m-I’m not sure. (looks at Jensen)

Jensen: (looks at Jared then quickly off stage to his left) Yeah? (to audience) Okay, guys. (Jared: Oh.) They’re, uh, they’re pulling the plug on us. So, it looks like it’s autograph time. (Jared: Yeah) Uuuum. (audience claps and cheers) Thank you.

Jared: (waves mic in the air) (off mic) Thank you guys. (J2 stand up)

Jensen: I hope, uhhh- I hope we shed a little more light on our (looks at Jared then back to the audience) miserable lives. (Kansas-Wayward Sons starts playing) (Jared and audience laugh) And, uh, (smiles) we will, uh- We’ll see you at the tables in a little bit. So.. okay.

Jared pumps his fist in the air as both J2 turn to exit stage to their right, ending the panel. The audience clap and cheer their exit.

#spn #supernatural #jared padalecki #jensen ackles #spn con #spn transcript #chicon 2007 #2007

0 notes

writing-my-own-ending · 2 years

Text

Taking Prompts and Ideas for fanfiction ones oneshots! Fandoms listed below; I write for a variety of ships either reply to this post or DM me!

Fandoms:

911

Agents of Shield

Almighty Johnsons

Avengers/MCU

Being Human UK

Bones

Boondock Saints

Breakfast with Scot

Breakout Kings

Criminal Minds

CSI Miami

CSI NY

Daredevil

Defenders

Defending Jacob

Degrassi

Doctor Who

The Expanse

Fast and Furious

The Fosters

Game of Thrones

Ghost Whisperer

Gifted

Gilmore Girls

The Glades

Glee

Gossip

Graceland

Hansel & Gretel Witch Hunters

Hart of Dixie

Harry Potter

Heartland

Heroes

The Hobbit

House

How to Train Your Dragon

Hunger Games

Jurassic World

L Word

Les Mis

Lord of the Rings

Love Simon

Me Before You

Merlin

Night Shift

Numb3rs

Once Upon a Time

One Tree Hill

The Outsiders

Perks of Being a Wallflower

Pirates of the Caribbean

Pitch Perfect

Political Animals

Pretty Little Liars

Real Steel

Rent

Rookie Blue

Shameless

Sinister

Speechless

Sons of Anarchy

Star Trek 2009

Star Wars

Stranger Things

Supernatural

Ten Inch Hero

Trollied

Torchwood

Twilight

Vampire Diaries

Vikings

Walking Dead

Weeds

What Maisie Knew

Whispers

White Collar

X-Men (Movies)

Yu-Gi-Oh

Zoo

1 note · View note

addictofsupernatural · 4 years

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Dating a Freak

Boaz Priestly x reader

Summary: You reminisce over the course of your amazing relationship.

Author Note: I'm so sorry this took long.

Requested by: @forest-rav3n

Word Count: 2445

The time spent with Priestly has been the best time of your life. Every day was amazing. It was filled with filled with laughter and love, and it was an adventure. It made you remember how you fell in love.

You first met when you applied for the job at Beach City Grill, with your novelty movie t-shirt and a bubbly attitude. "She's gotta pass the interview first." Piper said.

"I'm cool with that." You smiled.

"Okay then," Priestly then leaned on the counter. "Elvis. Dead or alive?"

"Easy, alive. Next question."

"You're hired." He said. You chuckled and looked at Trucker, who smiled and shrugged.

You then helped with cooking the meat, as well as baking cookies for the kids meals. Priestly would constantly make jokes to you, and you always laughed. Sometimes when he was doing one of his random debates with Trucker, you'd hype the both of them up, just to get a kick out of Priestly getting more excited and energized over whatever they were talking about.

Regulars loved you. You would always make extra cookies for the two old people who would come in, as well as the kid who came in weekly. He was an adult already, but was autistic. He looked uncomfortable when he first walked in since everybody was staring at him, so you couldn't help but smile at him and give him some cookies. He smiled back at you and would come back every Tuesday during lunch.

Sometimes guys would try to hit on you. You'd ask for their order and they'd try their best to get you to come with them after work. Usually your roll your eyes and say, "Tish, you have a customer."

Sometimes you'd just turn them down flat. Either way you handled them, it always put a smile to Priestly's face. Not that you knew.

But there was one day where Priestly wasn't at work yet, and these guys walked in. One of them tried to get you come home with him, and you told him that you weren't like that. He scoffed. "C'mon, you won't get this opportunity all the time. It's not like I'm asking for your face. You just happen to have a nice body."

You threw his order at him. "Just fucking pay and leave. Learn how to take a damn rejection."

He paid and stormed out with his friends. One of his friends stayed behind and told you, "He's right, y'know." and left.

You don't know why their words hit you so hard, but they did. What if they were right? "You alright angel?"

"Um, yeah, yeah," you said with a smile that you could barely muster up. "I just need some time alone for a bit."

You then sat in the storage room and silently cried. Priestly walked in and announced himself before asking where you were. They told him what happened and he rushed over to the storage room. He saw you on the floor, with your face in your hands. "Y/n." He kneeled down.

"Do you think I'm ugly?" Your voice was quiet, and your face was still buried in your hands.

He took away your hands from your face, and you looked up to see his worried face. "You shouldn't have to worry about artificial crap like that. You're awesome in everyway. Like the way you defend yourself from jackasses, or how you make extra cookies for the special needs kid that most people like to make fun of. What matters is that you're a pretty fucking amazing person."

You wiped your eyes and chuckled. "Thanks Priestly. You're always so good to me." You gave him a hug, which made him tense up for a up before relaxing and hugging you back.

"And to answer your question, no. I don't think you're ugly at all. You're actually think you're pretty hot." You giggled.

You then began to develop feelings for Priestly. Though you kept it to yourself, everybody else found out about it. Tish teased you about it and made comments on how it was a mystery that anyone could crush on someone as weird as him. Piper, Trucker, and Jen told you that you'd be good together and to go for it. Jen would make the occasional joke about Priestly. Zoe told you that she could sense the same feelings in Priestly as well. Though you were grateful for the support, you weren't confident in what he thought about you enough to do anything about your feelings.

Then there was the whole tampon run. You figured that he would need help and came with him. You kept making jokes when he was panicking on what to get. After you helped him pick one out, you went to grab different items while he stood in line.

You heard people making fun of him, and him retaliating with a speech about having a girlfriend and getting laid. You figured that it'd be the right thing to help him out, and although it was embarrassing for you, it was for Priestly.

You took out the hair tie in your hair, letting your hair fall down your shoulders. You tied your shirt up from the back into a crop top with the hair tie. You walked up to Priestly and gave him a long kiss on the lips. "Hey babe. Got everything?"

He looked at you with a shocked expression, but quickly recovered to get into character with you. "Yeah. I got your tampons for you."

"Aww, thanks babe. But you know I'm not on it anymore this month, right?" You wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed his neck.

"Hell yeah I do. Let's go home." He slapped a 20 on the counter.

"Whatever you say." You grabbed the bag of items and Priestly put and arm around your shoulder.

"Keep the change. Peace." He said before giving them the peace sign that turned into flipping them off. Once you got out of the store the both of you started laughing together. "Well now, we got ourselves an actress."

"It isn't really hard to act that way with you." You said absentmindedly, instantly regretting it. His facial expression changed a bit, and you looked down in embarrassment. Of course he'd feel weird about that. How could he even like you like that? "Um, anyways, we should head back to the grill."

As you and Priestly cleaned up that night, he tapped your shoulder gently from behind. You turned around looked up to the tall nervous looking man standing in front of you. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, I just wanted to ask you something important. Just, y'know, don't laugh or anything." You smiled and nodded for him to continue. "Would you, like to, accompany me on a date tonight?" He asked slowly.

"A date?" You asked. He nodded, and your lips went into a wide grin. Holy crap, Zoe was actually a witch, and you loved her for it. "I'd love to."

"Really?" He asked, smiling.

You giggled and nodded, wrapping your arms around him. "Can you give me a ride home so I can get ready?"

He put his hands on his hips and shook his head. "So lazy." He then walked outside and held the door open for you. Once you got to your house, he put his hand over you before you could leave the car. "Wear something nice."

"Like what, my cleanest hoodie?" You teased.

"As much as I'd love to see the hoodie I got you for your birthday, nah. I mean dressing like you're going to a fancy place." You nodded and kissed his cheek, walking up to your apartment number.

You put on a white long sleeved shirt and a flowy peach mini skirt. You'd never really had a reason to put this on before, but wearing it made you feel nervous on what Priestly would think of the outfit. What would he be wearing? Maybe his quilt, and the two of you would both have shirts on. Maybe he did his hair in a different style. All you knew was that you couldn't wait for him to come.

About an hour later you heard a knock at the door and excitedly ran to it. You answered it, and wasn't ready for what you saw. All of Priestly's piercings were out, and the hair color was washed off. He was wearing a nice black blazer with a light blue button up. He looked shy. "Holy shit." You laughed out.

"Would you care to accompany me on this date Miss y/l/n?" He offered his arm.

You hooked your arm into his. "Of course." He smiled and looked down. "You look very nice, by the way."

"You look gorgeous." He opened the car door for you. You smiled at him and gave his cheek a kiss before going in the car.

"You cleaned the car." You looked around.

He shrugged and smiled. "I cleaned the car."

He took you to a nice restaurant, where the two of you talked about anything and everything. Though Priestly tried to remain a civilized gentleman, his true unfiltered jokester self was shining through, and you thought it was the cutest thing ever. Afterwards the you two walked together along the beach, where he put his blazer over your shoulders and listened to you ramble on.

He then took you home and kissed your cheek. "Aren't you just adorable tonight?" You teased.

"Well, do you like me better like this?" He had a nervous smile.

You chuckled and shook your head. "I have no idea what you're talking about. Just because you dressed differently doesn't make you a different person. You're still my Priestly that always puts a smile on my face."

"Your Priestly?" His face was now covered with a wide grin.

"Well, as long as I can be your y/n." He went in for a passionate kiss. Once you pulled back for breath, you asked. "Do you wanna come in?" His facial expression changed to nervous again. "Not for that reason, dumbass. I just don't want this date to be over. I made brownies the other day." He smiled and came in.

You woke up leaning on Priestly as a pillow with the TV still on. You checked the time and saw that your shifts start in ten minutes. In a panic, you shook Priestly awake and told him about the time, hurriedly brushing your teeth and putting on your shoes. "You don't have to worry. I'm always late." He said groggily from the couch.

"Okay, just cause you're cute when your sleepy, doesn't mean we don't still gotta go to work." You said.

"Wait, I have to put on my hair color and get ready."

"Then let's go to your place real quick." You handed him his shoes and pushed him out of the apartment.

As you were driving to his house, he said, "You fell asleep on me." You turned to see his adorable smile.

"You wouldn't let me leave your arms." You smiled back.

"And you're still wearing your clothes from last night."

You looked down, still in the skirt and shirt. "Crap. Can I borrow a shirt?"

"That'd be pretty hot." You both later came in together. Priestly was wearing one of his regular outfits, and you were wearing his Tip me or DIE shirt tucked in under your skirt and a flannel. "We're here!"

Everybody stared at you while you walked behind the counter. "It's not what it looks like." You said before you went into the storage room, with the other three girls excitedly running after you.

After that you two were unbreakable. He would always make sure you were feeling loved, from a simple squeeze on your arm to a passionate kiss. And most of all, he just couldn't help but praise you.

He would try his best to make romantic dates and be a gentleman, but sometimes it was too easy to provoke his playful side. At times he would take you on regular dates, like the movies or a carnival. You would take him on dates as well, from picnics to watching one of his favorite rock bands.

You were the first one to say that you love him. You knew that he was shy when it came to his feelings, so you were okay with saying it first.

It came naturally. The two of you had waited for a while to have sex. It had to be perfect, and he didn't want you to think of your first time with him as a cheap hook up. He wanted it to mean something.

That's why when he took you to a fancy restaurant, and had a walk in the park with Priestly and you acting like children and hopping on the big stones by the walkway. He then took you back to his apartment, where the two of made love.

When you woke up the next morning, you felt him kiss the top of your head before getting off the bed. He told you that he would make you some eggs, and you rolled onto your stomach. You smiled. That's when you said it. "I love you."

He stopped in his tracks, and ran over to the bed, kneeling down. "What?!"

"I love you." You bit your lip to hold in your laugh. You knew he felt the same way, and watching his innocent looking face was almost too adorable. "Do you have something to tell me?" You joked.

He gave you the biggest smile before excitingly jumping onto the bed and smothering you with kisses. "I love you too!" He laughed out between kisses.

After a few months of bliss, Priestly had a plan. He had a plan to watch your favorite movies, to cook you dinner, and to have you feel special. He had a plan, which was in a little black box on his top drawer at home. He had a plan to ask you a question, so you two could go on amazing dates forever.

#boaz prieslty x reader #boaz priestly #ten inch hero #boaz priestly fanfiction #ten inch hero fanfiction

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violentdelightsproductions · 2 years

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Cocktails and Dreams 🍸🍹

While everyone here says that their favorite season is the summer, there is no better season than party season. And this time of the year there is plenty of magic to go around. So make a wish and blow the candles. Maybe when you open you will see a good thing standing right in front of you.

#dean winchester #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester x oc #dean winchester fanfiction #dean winchester x y/n #supernatural oc #supernatural au #ten inch hero #deborah ann woll #jensen ackles x deborah ann woll #aesthetic #dellie #dean winchester x ellie spencer

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cocklesdestielfiction · 5 years

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First of all, guys... WHAT A PLEASURE to read all these amazing fics!

You. NAILED. IT.!

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Not in Kansas Anymore By @emblue-sparks

Crossover: Supernatural - Ten Inch Hero

Summary: Team Free Will hops the pond to London for a case that Rowena requested help with. When things become too good to be true for Cas, he realizes he's not in Kansas anymore. Nor London. And Dean makes a convincing argument for staying, wherever they are. Will Cas remain, or choose the more difficult path?

Words: 4588

Rating: Explicit

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Horns and Halos by @alicethrutheburrows

Crossover: Supernatural - Suits

Summary: Bounty Hunter Dean, Cowboy Cas, Demon Defense Lawyers, and one hell of a notebook scene!

Dean Winchester, bounty hunter extraordinaire. Or he was. Now he was just a lost man chasing bounties, drinking beer and drifting town to town. He stumbles into a bar named Horns and Halos and finds more than just beer. With the help of a certain cowboy Dean learns that home isn't a place; it's a feeling. And that a man has to be lost before he can be found.

Words: 4953

Rating: Mature

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A Hunter, an Angel, A Werewolf and a FED Walked Into a Bar... by @all-or-nothing-baby

Crossover: Supernatural - Teen Wolf

Summary: If Dean didn’t look away now, he’d be popping a boner like a fourteen-year-old finding his first skin mag under Dad’s bed.

He resumed his saunter back to the table just as the Hot Dudes peeled themselves apart.

"Cas..." Dean grunted, setting the drinks down and immediately sinking both his whiskeys as Cas joined them. “Who're these fellas?"

The one where Destiel meet Sterek...

Words: 6082

Rating: Explicit

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Crappe's Creek by @navajolovesdestiel

Crossover: Supernatural - Schitt’s Creek

Summary: Cas lay in the bed. He sighed deeply and turned over. Then he turned over to the other side. He sat up. The bed was so uncomfortable, the room so dreary, he wanted to scream.

Just a couple of weeks ago, his family had everything-a mansion, wealth, power.... He had everything he wanted and more. And now?

Words: 5939

Rating: Explicit

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That Being Said, So Get This by @poorreputation

Crossover: Supernatural - Buzzfeed Unsolved

Summary: What happens when Buzzfeed: Unsolved and Supernatural are set in the same universe!

Ryan Bergara, the believer. Shane Madej, the skeptic. The Winchester Brothers- serial killers?

And whatever happened to James Novak?

Words: 6391

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

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Working Vacation by @bre95611

Crossover: Supernatural - Good Omens

Summary: When Dean hears news of some trouble over seas, he and Cas take a working vacation to see what's going on!

Words: 4807

Rating: Mature

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Lucifer, Stay, Good Hunter. by @agusvedder

Crossover: Supernatural - Lucifer (TV)

Summary: Lucifer Morningstar tends to fuck things up, but not as much as he did this time. He sent his mom by mistake to an existant universe instead of a empty one. Luckily he crossed paths with two brothers and an angel that will help him find mom before it's too late.

Words:7493

Rating: Mature

----

This was so much fun, guys. These works are AMAZING. THANK Y’ALL FOR BEING A PART OF THIS!

#CocklesDestiel writers appreciation #cocklesdestielfiction #Destiel fanfic #DEstiel fanfiction #crazy crossover challenge #Crossover #ten inch hero #suits #teen wolf #schitts creek #buzzfeed unsolved #Good omens #Lucifer TV

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nerdywrites · 6 years

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Masterlist

{I write about:

Marvel - Supernatural - Harry Potter - Sherlock - Stranger Things - It - Ten Inch Hero - Twenty One Pilots - Shawn Mendes - The Office

Casts are included}

{Important A/N: I know that some of these weren’t posted on this account, but I started writing on @peter-parkers-backpack before making a separate blog, so the writing is still mine}

{None of these GIFs are mine, all credit goes to their creators}

Marvel:

Peter Parker:

67 Chevy Impala {Part 2} - When a new family rolls into town, one member catches Peter Parker’s eye. But something’s off about them. Winchester!reader

Of All The People You Could Have Pissed Off - When the new girl is a pretty as she is, Peter needs a wingman. Stark!reader

The Perfect Night {Part 2} - It takes a lot of patience and heartbreak to be Peter Parker’s girlfriend, but some things just cross the line. Stark!reader

Dancing In The Rain - Messing with your boyfriend and dancing in the rain is worth the risks of hypothermia

It Appears Barnes Has A Sister - Being Bucky’s sister and being a super soldier means it’s inevitable you meet Peter Parker, even if just by accident. Barnes!reader

Friday The 13th - Just a few pranks for your boyfriend who is terrified of clowns

Damn You’ve Got It Bad - What would have happened if Peter had gone to the pool in D.C.?

Mine - Songfic, based on Mine by Taylor Swift

She Doesn’t Need Saving {Part 2} {Part 3} {Part 4} {Part 5} - Where a girl comes into the Avengers’ lives, in search for someone, helping them in the process. Amazon!reader

The Summer Soldier - (Y/n) finds herself living with the father she never knew and discovering the life of an Avenger after her mother dies unexpectedly, in a car crash on her way home from work. Stark!reader (Series)

But I’m Your Dork - When the reader is struggling after having a seizure in Incredibles II, Peter knows exactly how to comfort her

Jean Jacket - Peter has a huge crush on Hollywood’s favorite young actress, but he never expected to meet her

MJ:

As Long As I Don’t Have To Chase Away Boys - When Peter sets her up with MJ, the reader thinks she has to hide it from her dad. Stark!reader

Cast:

Tom Holland:

Simple - Based on Simple by Florida Georgia Line

Stranger Things:

Dustin Henderson:

Snow Ball - Where Dustin gets asked to dance by someone he would never expect

Asylum Escapee - Where Eleven has a sister who escaped from the Upside Down

Steve Harrington:

Are You Going To Be An Overprotective Baby Brother? - Where the flirty Steve Harrington unknowingly falls in love with Dustin’s big sister. Henderson!reader

Eleven:

Moonlight - Where a night at the Snow Ball may not have been as bad as they thought

Will Byers:

Zombie Boy - Will finds out his crush has been standing up for him from the beginning

Mike Wheeler:

You’re Beautiful You Know - Mike knows how the reader feels about herself, and tells her how wrong she is

Max Mayfield:

I’m Always Right Here - Max can always go to the reader’s house after a fight with Billy

Cast:

Finn Wolfhard:

Dusk Till Dawn - Turns out fans freak out when their otp sings together, and even more when they react to their edits. But a certain livestream might take the cake

I’ll Sneeze In Your Cereal - When the reader get’s sick, Finn refuses to do anything but take care of her

Harry Potter:

Draco Malfoy:

I Knew You Were A Git But This Is A New Low - When they get trapped in the Room Of Requirement with Draco Malfoy, the reader’s night may not turn out as bad as she thought. Potter!reader

Harry Potter:

Together - The war is won, now it’s time to figure out how to deal with it. Weasley!reader

James Potter:

Marry Me - Songfic, based on Marry Me by Thomas Rhett

She’s Perfect - In which the twin of Remus Lupin falls in love with one of her best friends, who seems to be in love with someone else. Lupin!reader

Sirius Black:

Marry Me - Songfic, based on Marry Me by Thomas Rhett

Nothin’ Like You - Based on Nothin’ Like You by Dan + Shay

Ten Inch Hero:

Boaz Priestly:

The One With The Mohawk - When the reader moves into an apartment next to a guy with colorful hair, she doesn’t expect the adventures that come with it

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xuberfanx · 6 years

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Fanfic prompt about Dean

Write a fic about Dean, can be about whatever you want it to be. Illustrate it using at least five gifs or photos from Jensen Ackles' other, non- Dean Winchester roles. The more roles the better.

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thebiggerbear · 3 months

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Ten Inch Hero Masterlist

Characters

Boaz Priestly

Tish Matheson

Ships

Priestly x Tish

#thebiggerbear ten inch hero masterlist #thebiggerbear #ten inch hero fanfiction

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ericasrandomthoughts · 3 years

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In The Past

Hawks ( Keigo Tamaki ) x reader

Author’s note: I’m new to my hero so if any character that in show doesn’t act the same why please do tell me what they act like if I do any fanfictions.

“Hero Hawks is now the number two hero” You were currently reading a new article about hawks, your coworker and childhood best friend. You two still talk but lately your schedule has been everywhere. So in a nutshell you couldn’t see him lately.

Hawks, he was in the spotlight for his speed and how pretty he looked. He was an inches taller than you maybe even taller, he’s eyes matched his blonde messy hair.

He was an angel. While to you at least, he had pretty good sense of humor and his personality was… good. Well besides him trying to flirt with you every ten seconds. But it’s fine.

Anyway, you were actually waiting for the little bird to visit you. This was the only time that this could happen this week. You planned the normal to just talk about something or watch some movies.

“I hope he he doesn’t have anything planned.” He had something planned, cause as soon as you said said in the 15 minute period, he had knocked on the door.

“Hey kid,” he waved at you as well as his wings. “It’s been a while.”

“Yeah, it has.” You smiled in response. He walked welcoming himself in with the loudest laugh.

You didn’t know what the joke was but you just went with it. The bird dude sat on you couch when you closed the door.

“ what do you want to do?” He asked when he saw you.

“Well you did plan to meet up so you can just chose what we do.” You said taking a sat down beside him. He smirked.

Oh god- what is he going to do.

“Okay,” he put a big goofy face on scooted closer to you.

Yeah he did have some in mind. Please no. You looked down at you hands which was placed on your knees because of the male.

To be honest, hawks had a big thing for you. Like a really big thing for you. He would buy you gifts and he would through hell and back just to see you happy. Even if it hurts him. Anything for you, he would do. He was in love with you and he still is. You just didn’t know if he had it anymore.

You loved him too. He was the only one understands you. You had each other’s back’s. That is what keeping you going. The bond you and hawks has is so strong.

“Y/n,” you looked at him. To your surprise, he had the same face had when you both in UA. He was a blushing mess but you didn’t notice at the time. “I-I don’t know how to say this.”

He paused for a second but once he had the idea in mind he forgot it. You connected the dots and smirked.

“What’s wrong? Cat’s got you tongue?” You giggled out. You a fast learner in the moment. When you learned hawks had a crush on you, you kinda ignored it. Because you could be wrong. But no right now? You were so correct.

“What, no. You’re making this harder for me!” He blushed a little more, bitting his lip and looking away.

“Hawks~” You’re voice sang with a smile. “I love you.”

You could imagine how red hawk’s face. He some how managed to spill out, “ I-I love you too.”

“Aww hawks”

#mha hawks #mha x reader #bnha hawks #pro hero hawks #hawks x reader #hawks x y/n #my hero academia hawks #boku no hero academia hawks #mha x y/n

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master-sass-blast · 3 years

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This Life is Infinite: Chapter One.

OH YEAH. IT'S TIME, BITCHES!!!

Summary: The Infinity War Fic aka I do whatever the fuck I want with the Russo's canon.

Get ready for the most ambitious crossover in CHC history.

Pairing(s): Piotr Rasputin x Reader, Nathan Summers x Wade Wilson, Alexandra Rasputin x Nikolai Rasputin, and Kitty Pryde x Illyana Rasputin.

Rating: M for canon typical violence and death threats.

Word Count: 10k... oops.

Set after "Children of the Gods: Part Three."

Author's Note: Tentatively, I’m back from my hiatus. Things are nowhere near settled with my mental health, but I’m feeling well enough to post again.

I think it mostly goes without saying that updates for this series might be a little irregular going forward; not only do I need to take care of myself, but I also need to find a better balance with posting fanfiction and the rest of my life. As always, I will do my best to be clear with you all about what to expect in terms of updates and wait times.

Thank you again for your compassion and understanding.

Taglist: @marvel-is-perfection, @chromecutie, @super-darkcloudstudent, @girl-obsessed-with-things, @leo-writer, @emma-frxst, @sadstone-s

It’s not every day that mysterious, leather-clad men appear –quite literally, considering they teleported in—in your kitchen unannounced.

(Okay, perhaps they don’t qualify as “mysterious” when one of them is your dad, one of them is your brother, and the third is your uncle, but there’s a fourth man with them that you don’t recognize, so you like to think that the principle of the expression remains intact.)

You glance between Nate, Wade, your uncle, and the aforementioned unrecognized fourth man, then lift the box of cereal you’d been pouring into a bowl by way of greeting. “Breakfast?”

***

(The fourth man, as it turns out, goes by the code name “Kronos” –which, in terms of super cool code names, ranks at about an eight.)

“There’s a war coming,” Nate explains while the four of you stand around your kitchen counter. “Apocalypse is stirring. He’ll be sending his allies to Earth to initiate the first stage of the war, so that he’ll encounter less resistance when he comes to rule.”

“‘s called ‘The Decimation,’” Wade interjects as he shovels spoonfuls of Lucky Charms into his mouth. He points at his bowl, then jerks his head at the fridge. “D’ y’all have chocolate syrup?”

“Yeah, second shelf on the door.” You take another bite of your cereal, swallow, then ask Nathan, “What… what happens with ‘The Decimation?’”

“One of Apocalypse’s allies, Thanos, will arrive with his armies and generals. He’ll use his own forces to annihilate the heroes of Earth, then he’ll finish assembling the Infinity Stones and gauntlet and use them to wipe out half of all life across the cosmos.”

You purse your lips together and eye your dad warily. “If… if this was anyone other than you saying this, I’d say this all sounds like a hackneyed comic book and-or movie plot.”

“His information checks out,” Kronos says, voice low and gravelly. “Our cross-temporal intel confirms communications between Apocalypse and Thanos. We might have a few weeks to prepare for Thanos’s arrival –and that’s if we’re lucky.”

Wade snorts and mutters something that sounds suspiciously like “handwavey bullshit” under his breath.

You look to your uncle. “And you’re here because…”

“Need to talk to Xavier,” your uncle answers, “and then alert the Avengers and anyone else that can help us face Thanos.”

“Right,” you say slowly. “And you stopped here first because…”

“I was hungry,” Wade blurts as he drizzles more chocolate syrup on top of his cereal.

“You have credibility,” Nathan says while shooting Wade an equally annoyed and endeared look. “Xavier and Piotr listen to you, and the rest of the X-Men listen to them. We can’t afford to deal with a bunch of hesitating and infighting right now. We need to get our shit together and defeat Thanos, or the world as we know it is fucked.”

“Question.” Wade lifts his spoon. “Does Donald Trump die in this decimation bullshit?”

“We’ll deal with him later,” your uncle stage-whispers to Wade.

“If you’re all sure…” You wait for all four of them to nod, then sigh and shrug. “Alright. I think most of the X-Men are training right now. Let’s go talk to them.”

***

“This all sounds fucking insane.”

Wade gasps. The eyes on his mask widen as he lifts a gloved hand to where his mouth is under his mask. “James Doohan used a no-no word! My goodness gracious golly!”

Scott Summers scowls, but otherwise ignores Wade. He turns to the Professor, expression incredulous. “Do you believe… any of this?”

Xavier grimaces. “Our sources through Kronos” –he gestures to your uncle’s colleague—“have been confirming the intentions of Apocalypse for several years now. The difficulty was always in determining when Apocalypse would act, and in which timeline –though, now that we have Cable’s intel, we’ve been able to figure those two details out.”

“If Thanos is as powerful as you’re saying,” Ororo pipes up, looking at Nathan, “then how are we supposed to defeat him?”

“Any way we can,” Nathan fires back, expression grim.

“Our intel says that Thanos only has three of the six Infinity Stones, along with the gauntlet,” Kronos adds. “If we can keep the last three stones out of his hands and defeat his armies here on Earth, we’ll have better odds of facing Apocalypse down the road.”

“Right,” Jean says. “And where are the last three stones?”

“The Mind Stone is in the possession of Vision, an android created by Ultron, who now works with the Avengers,” Kronos explains. “The Time Stone is in the possession of Doctor Stephen Strange, who leads an order of sorcerers and magic users in New York. The Soul Stone… has yet to be located.”

“And we’re sure that Thanos is coming here?” Ororo asks, brows raised in skepticism.

“One of the unifying features across the pertinent timelines is a battle that takes place on Earth, specifically in the country of Wakanda,” Kronos answers. “Regardless of the other features in the timeline, there is always a major confrontation between Thanos and the forces of earth there.”

“Great,” Rogue deadpans, expression flat. “Now we just have to convince them to let us in. ‘Excuse me, your Majesty T’Challa, but there’s an evil spaceman that is collecting all powerful rhinestones and he’s going to come here to try and wipe out half of all life on Earth, so we need you to let us into your country with strict visitation policies to we can help you fight him.’ Yeah, that’ll go over real well.”

“We don’t have time to waste on sarcastic bullshit,” Nathan grits out, cybernetic eye flaring as he glares at Rogue. “We’ll handle getting the Avengers and Wakanda on board,” he says, turning to the Professor. “I take it we can trust you to get your team and Magneto collected?”

“I’ll contact Erik,” Xavier promises before looking over at your husband. “Piotr, would you mind calling your family? I believe, given the severity of the coming conflict, having as many hands as possible would be in our best interests.”

Piotr nods. “Konechno –of course.” He looks up at you from where he’s sitting, confusion clear in his sky blue eyes—

“You good to come with us?” Nathan asks, tapping your shoulder lightly to get your attention. “We’ll need help talking to Stark.”

“Huh? Uh –yeah. Sure.” You look back at Piotr; the request to ask for five minutes, just five minutes, to talk to your husband is on the tip of your tongue—

Nate tugs you –gently—a couple inches closer, then says, “Bodyslide by five.”

The room blurs, then disappears from view.

***

You’ve only bodyslid with Nathan a handful of times –and each time you do, you’re always caught off guard by how fucking weird it feels.

Your stomach lurches like you’ve just gone down the steepest drop on a rollercoaster, even though the ground remains steady beneath your feet. In a flash, there’s a brand new room in front of you –sleek, monochromatic cabinets, white marble countertops, stainless steel appliances and fixtures, the works. The space oozes sophistication, function, style –and money. So much money.

Given everything you’ve heard about Tony Stark, it makes sense.

“Deep breaths,” Nathan says. He places a steadying hand on your shoulder while you blink rapidly. “In through the nose, out through the mouth.”

You do your best to comply –though it’s a bit difficult, given that your brain is shrieking ‘sensory overload’ while trying to adjust to the new lighting, the new sounds, the sensation of having moved without really having moved at all, at least in the sense of walking or riding in a car—

And then alarms start blaring. Red lights flash, klaxons go off, the works.

Wade swears and claps his hands over his ears. “Christ! For a guy who has literal robots that can wipe his ass with dollar bills, you think he’d invest in something a little easier on the ears!”

“Wilson!” The klaxons and red lights cut out, replaced by various whirring noises and the sound of hurried, angry footsteps. “I swear to God, if you’ve hijacked one of my jets again, I’m gonna –who the fuck are all of you?”

Tony Stark looks… nothing like what you see in the papers. Granted, his face and hair look largely the same, but he’s not wearing the crisp, stylish suits that all the magazines, articles, papers, and interviews feature him wearing. He’s got on a worn, holey Metallica shirt, ripped, grease stained jeans, and a pair of scuffed sneakers that look like they might’ve been purchased ten years ago, for all that they’re barely holding together.

The army of security bots hovering and whirring around him, however, do fit his press image.

“Jon Snow!” Wade chirps, waggling his fingers at the harried “genius-billionaire-playboy-philanthropist.” “Long time, no talk. How’s Daenerys doing?”

“Summers, would you do me a favor and put your psychopath on a leash?” Tony asks, tone less than polite or pleasant as he focuses on Nate. “Preferably a nice short one that’s far away from me?”

“We’re here to talk,” Nathan says –though he does stop Wade from trying to play with the knives in the block on the kitchen counter. “It’s a matter of life and death. The well-being of the entire universe is at stake.”

“Yeah, been there, done that,” Tony says, looking none too impressed.

“One of your colleagues may have mentioned his name,” Kronos interjects, taking a step forward. “Does the word ‘Thanos’ ring any bells?”

Tony’s expression sobers for an instant, but he hides it quickly enough. “This is private property, and you’re all—”

A red being with a green suit and a yellow gem in the center of his forehead emerges from the floor. He places himself between Tony and the rest of you. “Would you like me to escort them out, Mr. Stark?”

“Ah, Casper the Friendly Android with No Concept of Personal Boundaries Despite the Infinite Knowledge!” Wade fires back, waving cheerfully. “How you doing, twenty-twenty?”

Vision sighs, longsuffering. “You have been expressly forbidden from these premises, Mr. Wilson.”

“Unless he’s here under my direct supervision,” Nathan fires back. “Stark, we need to talk about this—”

“Tony?” A tall, elegant woman with red hair wearing a tailored, navy blue dress walks up behind the man in question. She flashes you all a polite smile, but there’s no missing the way her gaze cautiously assesses each one of you. “I’m guessing these aren’t –oh. Wade’s here.”

Wade waves in response. “Hi, Miss Potts! How’s being a CEO?”

“It’s going very well, thank you,” Pepper replies politely –though, this time, she’s scanning the room for missing objects and-or visible damage. When nothing turns up, she looks back at Tony. “Are we escorting them out?”

“They claim to have information about the end of the world,” Tony says, tone flippant –though the grave expression on his face belies his snark. “About Thanos.”

Recognition flashes over Pepper’s face, though her polite mask never fully slips. She nods, then says, “Are we going to listen to them?”

“Probably should,” Tony replies in the same lackadaisical tone. “I’m not turning off the security drones while Wilson’s here, though.”

“Just for that, I’m pissing in your Ficus before I leave,” Wade huffs.

“That seems like it’s for the best,” Pepper tells Tony, smiling going tight at the edges while she stares at Wade. She takes a breath, steeling herself, then steps past Tony and nods at the rest of you in greeting. “Sorry for the confusion. Would you mind coming with us, so we can talk somewhere more comfortable?”

***

“I started connecting the dots after Thor left,” Tony explains, twirling a pencil between his fingers as he paces back and forth. “He mentioned Thanos briefly –but with the destruction and repurposing of Loki’s staff, the straggling records of Dormammu’s attack and the use of the Time Stone by Strange, the roles that the Tesseract and Loki’s staff played in the attack on New York by the Chitauri…” He sighs, pausing to stare out at the window at some unseen object before grimacing and shrugging. “It wasn’t hard to figure out.”

You’re all gathered in a conference room –which, as with the kitchen, carries the same modern, sleek style. Floor to ceiling windows show off the training grounds and the forest that conceals the base from the rest of the world. A massive plasma TV takes up one of the far walls, while the other walls are taken up by various dormant, holographic and electronic displays (made by Stark himself, no doubt). A black, oblong table sits in the center of the room, with leather, silver studded swivel chairs positioned around it.

“How many are there?” Tony asks, looking first at Kronos, then at Nathan. “How much time do we have?”

“There are six Infinity Stones in total,” Kronos says. “Thanos already has three –the Space stone, which was contained by the Tesseract, the Reality stone and the Power stone. Your colleague, Vision—” he gestures to the android “—is in possession of the Mind Stone already, and Stephen Strange has the Time Stone. Our agents have been unable to confirm the whereabouts of the Soul Stone, but we’re certain that Thanos doesn’t have it.”

“Yet,” Tony adds, tone pessimistic.

“As far as time goes, we have a few days at most,” Nathan says, crossing his arms over his chest. “Maybe a week, if we’re lucky.”

Tony grimaces. “That doesn’t bode well for rebuilding international relations on a dime. Or team morale for that matter.”

“Sort it out,” Nathan gravels out. “We’ve got bigger issues.”

“We won’t have time for issues if we can’t even pull a team together,” Tony snaps.

“If it helps…” Kronos withdraws a flash drive from his jacket pocket and holds it out to Tony. “The evidence of Thanos’s collection of the stones and his plans to come here.”

Tony accepts the flash drive. He turns it over in his fingers a couple times –no doubt mentally comparing the drive to the technology he’s created—then pockets it. “And Xavier’s on board with all this?”

You blink when you realize everyone’s staring at you. “Uh –yes. He’s contacting Erik Lensherr for some additional support, and the rest of the X-Men are ready to take on Thanos as well.”

“Great.” Tony stares down at the table for a moment, expression slightly melancholy but otherwise inscrutable, but then he snaps back to his usual self. “Good meeting. I’ll text you with the details.”

“Ooh, does that mean we’re trading numbers?” Wade gasps, pressing his hands on either side of his face. “I’ll put you on my favorites list.”

“I’ll contact Xavier,” Tony amends, shooting Wade a slightly harried look.

“We’ll be ready,” you assure him, at a loss for what else to say as you hook your arm around Wade’s to keep him from messing with the holographic display system.

“Vision will escort you out,” Pepper says with a polite smile and nod.

“I’ll make you a friendship bracelet, Tony the Tiger!” Wade calls as you and Nathan gently usher him towards the door. “Wait –stop shoving me! I need to get his wrist size!”

“Later, gorgeous,” Nate says with a barely suppressed smile.

Under any other circumstances, you’d laugh, but the stony foreboding weighing down your gut makes it too hard to even muster up a chuckle –especially when you catch Tony slumping down into one of the conference room chairs with a despairing expression on his face. You force yourself to focus on getting Wade out of the Avenger’s headquarters without stealing anything –though that does little to calm your swirling thoughts. How in the hell are we gonna pull this off?

***

“Are you okay?”

You sigh, instinctively wriggling back against Piotr’s chest as he lays down behind you. “Define ‘okay.’”

It’s nearly midnight now. Between contacting other allies for help –Nathan had you all bodysliding around New York for the better part of the day to reach out to the Hell’s Kitchen figures—and learning up about Thanos’s army and what could be expected in a confrontation against him, you didn’t get home until well after dinner.

You’re in bed now, too tired for anything else. You stare out the windows that overlook the balcony, purposefully trying to keep your mind blank so you don’t grow overwhelmed by the chaos buzzing in your brain.

Because this is insane. This is beyond mutant trafficking or petty grievances between groups of mutant rivals or even being gunned down by the mafia. This is beyond abusive parents, groups of hateful bigots, or anti-mutant legislators.

It’s –quite literally—the fate of the entire world. The entire galaxy. Based on Nathan’s reports of the future, half of all life is wiped out. People, animals, plants –all gone, dissolved into piles of ash… and for what? So some egomaniac can have his moment of glory?

Your stomach curdles when you even try to contemplate a life without Piotr.

“Hey.” Piotr draws you in close when you start crying. “Tische, myshka. Everything is okay.”

“But it’s not.” You sniff, wiping at your eyes with your sleeve. “Nothing about this is fucking okay, Piotr. Someone’s gonna wipe out half of the damn universe because he wants to jerk off to it later.”

“He has to go through us, first,” Piotr reminds you as he presses soft, sweet kisses against your cheek.

“We don’t have the numbers,” you point out bleakly. “We don’t have the ammunition. We don’t have the time to make a solid plan, or to prepare any extra defenses, or—”

Piotr hugs you tight. He kisses the top of your head. His hand strokes up and down your arm in an attempt to soothe you.

You grip his other hand, holding him close to you. You focus on how warm and solid he is. How wonderful he is and how lovely your life is with him. “I love you, Piotr.”

“And I love you, Y/N.”

You squeeze your eyes shut and cry some more.

***

The call comes in at five thirty in the morning.

“Stark’s brought around the other Avengers and Wakanda,” Nathan says, sounding far more alert than you ever will at this godforsaken hour. “We’re lifting off at seven.”

“Roger that,” you manage while Piotr turns on the bedside lamp and blinks the sleep out of his eyes. “We’ll be ready.” You set down your phone when the call ends, then groan and drop your head into your pillow. Why can’t the end of the world ever happen in the afternoon?

***

The Blackbird jets are loaded to maximum capacity. Aside from carrying the X-Men and the X-Force exclusive members, you’re also ferrying the Hell’s Kitchen vigilantes, Piotr’s family and Allison, your uncle and his team, and the younger children and their parents to Wakanda for safe-keeping (your uncle’s reasoning was that an enemy of the institute might notice the sudden lack of protection and decide to attack the younger, more vulnerable students and their families for vengeance, so it was better to be safe than sorry).

You keep close to Piotr or to the cockpit, but there’s still no avoiding the tense, cramped feeling.

You’re not the only “birds” in the sky, either. It’s practically a whole convoy, flying out to Wakanda in what might’ve been a formation if Wade didn’t occasionally grab the control and try to do a “barrel roll.” Magneto and his forces are flying in their own airship, while the Avengers are leading their pack in Tony’s custom, “cutting edge of technology” jets.

You watch the small fleet of jets that belong to the Avengers, lips pursed into a tight line. Your gaze darts over to the navigation board every few seconds, tracking your miniscule progress across the Atlantic Ocean towards Wakanda.

There’s a heavy sigh behind you, and then an even heavier pair of arms settle around your shoulders. “Myshka. You should rest.”

You “hmm” softly to let Piotr know you heard him, but you don’t step away from the cockpit door.

He kisses the top of head and starts gently rubbing your neck with his thumbs. “Will be several hours before arrival, dorogoy. There is nothing you can do until then.”

“It feels like wasting time,” you murmur back –because, naturally, Piotr’s seen to the heart of the issue already. “We’ve got so much to do.”

“And we can do nothing until we arrive in Wakanda.” Piotr kisses your temple, then gently nudges you away from the cockpit. “Come sit with me, lyublyu. You will need full energy when we land.”

And that, above all else, is the only reason you let Piotr usher you over to the nearest seat.

You crawl into his lap once he sits, curling up in his arms. You lay your head on his shoulder and let his warmth combined with the gentle thrum of the jet’s sonic engines lull you to sleep.

***

Wakanda is simultaneously everything and nothing like what you expected.

There’s a force shield that surrounds the inner part of the country that gives way as the convoy of ships pass through it. It almost seems to shimmer out of view before revealing an elegant, shining palace and curved, glimmering towers that comprise the larger part of the city. Lush jungle and towering, ice-capped mountains border the city, split by a winding river and rushing waterfalls.

It almost looks too beautiful to be real.

The awe-inducing visuals and technology don’t stop as the convoy flies out to a glittering, black glass structure that, on the navigation board, is labeled as the lab of Princess Shuri. The convoy swoops around to a massive hangar at the base of the building, landing just inside on the polished stone and metal floor.

Waiting for all of you in the hangar is King T’Challa Udaku; he’s wearing a black robe embroidered with silver thread and a vibrant kente scarf, and generally looks every bit as poised and unflappable as he did in the UN interviews. He’s flanked by his Dora Milaje soldiers –who are undeniably badass with their armor and spears, and you catch Ellie, Yukio, and Kitty all staring at the women in awe—and his partner, Nakia, and his sister, Princess Shuri.

Tony and Professor Xavier handle the introductions with the King, which lets you stretch and take in the hangar and throngs of superheroes. You recognize a few of them –Captain America aka Steve Rogers, Ant-Man aka Scott Lang and his entourage --including a man with dark hair styled like Elvis that you recall seeing in some sort of news interview a while back and a young woman with curly brown hair and warm eyes that’s holding his hand-- and War Hero ,aka James Rhodes, aka Tony’s best friend and “work wife”—but some of the entourage members are new to you.

You take a moment to stretch out your back –sleeping in Piotr’s lap isn’t the worst quality rest you’ve ever had, but given the configurations of the jet seats it was a little cramped—and admire the glimmering, inlaid lights on the hangar ceiling. Swanky.

“We have space prepared for the upcoming preparations and hosting all of you,” T’Challa says, voice cutting through the din of the crowd with ease. “If you would all follow Princess Shuri, please.”

Shuri smiles, then motions for everyone to follow her out of the hangar.

Half of the Dora Milaje break away from the formation, keeping a protective line between the princess and everyone else.

You fall into stride alongside your husband, well-practiced by now at matching your steps to his long stride.

***

The “prepared space” winds up being three massive rooms, each with smaller rooms sectioned around the main spaces, a kitchen-slash-rec area that joins the three massive rooms in the center, and three large, communal style bathrooms with multiple stalls for toilets and showers. The main rooms have several long, workstation style tables at them, with some beds stationed at the fringes, and the smaller rooms function only as bedrooms, mostly for the families with kids and the handful of couples present.

“This interface,” Princess Shuri says as she taps on a small disk embedded into the wall, “will let you contact security and staff if you have questions or need to speak with someone. There’s one in each room, for easy access. It will begin glowing and beeping if someone’s trying to send a call to you; you answer by pressing the base,” she explains, demonstrating on the disk.

“We’re expecting another group of people,” Tony pipes up. “Strange is collecting some of our allies from the South Eastern Quadrant. They should be here in the next sixteen hours, give or take.”

Shuri nods. “We’ll contact you when they arrive.” She offers the group a magnanimous nod and smile, then strides out the hall you all entered through, flanked by the Dora Milaje soldiers.

For a moment, no one moves. You all stand around, hesitating as you all try to take in the new scenery and space.

Alex moves first. She sighs, then grabs her duffel and strides towards the nearest workroom. “No point in waiting.”

Her initiative seems to jolt everyone else out of their daze. Everyone sections off, largely sticking with the groups of their original affiliation.

You amble alongside Piotr, peering around the workroom as you try to decide where to set your pack. Here goes nothing.

***

We’re staring down the apocalypse, you muse as you watch everyone set up shop, and it’s all coming down to sewing machines.

It’d come as a shock when Alexandra had lugged the sleek, white machine out of its carrying case. She’d set it on one of the tables, then lifted bolts of thick, rugged Kevlar out of one of her duffels next. Thread, scissors, measuring tape, and gridded cutting boards follow the Kevlar—

And then the sewing machine jammed as soon as Alex turned it on.

“Ty meshok der'ma,” Alex mutters under her breath as she fiddles with the internal mechanisms of the sewing machine. She glares at the gears, grumbling and swearing while she prods at them with a pair of tweezers. “Kakogo khrena tvoya problema?”

The situation seems mundane in its inanity.

The end of the damn world, and we’re being thwarted by twenty pounds of plastic and metal.

“Day mne poprobovat'.” Nikolai crouches down next to his wife. He adjusts the reading glasses perched on his nose, then aims a small flashlight at the interior of the machine. He murmurs and tuts in Russian while prodding at the machine –and then he makes a soft noise of exclamation. “Broken needle. Pryamo tam.”

“Sukin syn.” Alex uses her telekinesis to draw out the metal shard, then lets out an exasperated sigh and spreads her arms when the machine finally makes the proper start up noises. “Thank you.”

“Be nice,” Nikolai chides her with a teasing grin. “Is uncomfortable, having metal stuck in organs. You would not want to work either.”

“I’ve had metal in my organs,” Alex grumbles as she gets her sewing machine configured. “I still managed.” She smirks when Nikolai laughs, then kisses her husband’s cheek before motioning for you to approach. “Come here, ptitsa. I want to reinforce your suit; I need your measurements.”

You round the table, shucking off your sweatshirt so Alex can measure your torso. “Is there anything I need to do?”

“Just hold still, malenkiy,” Alex murmurs as she runs her tape measure around your waist.

“I make no promises,” you joke.

Alex snorts, then moves her measuring tape up to your ribcage.

***

The waiting is, somehow, worse now.

At least on the plan there was a promise of a destination. A sense of the temporary, that you’d be up and moving and doing again within a few hours.

Unfortunately, reality is so often different from how you envision it, just as it is now. Because the reality of the situation is that there are only a limited number of people capable of helping. Nate and Tony are working with the Princess to configure weapons to fight Thanos’s forces, Hank and the healers are preparing a makeshift medical bay, Frank, Wade, Mikhail, and Neena are cleaning and checking guns, Alex, Piotr and Nikolai are taking turns working on fabricating armor for those who need it—

Leaving you with nothing to do. Aside from keeping those who are working well fed and hydrated and managing the kids, all you can do is sit and watch while everyone else prepares.

It’s agony. Your chest aches from stress, and your stomach’s churning so much you can barely choke food down at mealtimes. I need to help more. I need to do something, dammit.

It’s like being in line for random execution and having no idea whether you’re going to be shot or not.

You stay close to Piotr. You run food and snacks and drinks for anyone who needs it. You help manage the kids when the need arises –but since most of their parents are here, the incidents are far and few between.

You sit. And you wait.

It’s all you can do.

***

“Absolutely not.”

“You need to be reasonable.”

“I am. It’s perfectly reasonable to keep a fourteen-year-old off a fucking battlefield!”

Alex sighs. She leans back in her seat and raises an eyebrow at her eldest daughter. “Normally I would agree, but I don’t think you’ll have much say in the matter. Your ability to control her is notably lacking.”

Artemis huffs and crosses her arms over her chest. “You try reining in a teenager who’s realized there’s no consequences to her actions.”

“I’m not judging, merely observing,” Alex assures her daughter. “But, at any rate, it’s not unreasonable to predict that she’ll join the fray at some point. Body armor is a necessity.”

“It’s an invitation! She’ll take it as permission!”

“Artemis?” Allison sticks her head into the room, then strides over to her mentor-slash-surrogate mother. “Is everything okay? Who’s getting permission to do what?”

“No one is,” Artemis grumbles, even as she holds her arm out so the teen can lean against her side. “Especially not you.”

Allison lets out a disgusted sigh and rolls her eyes. “I already told you—”

“You’re not fighting.”

“I can handle myself!” Allison snaps. She jerks away from Tatianna, scowling. “You’re treating me like a baby!”

“Compared to me, you are a baby,” the older woman points out drily.

“It’s not your burden to bear,” Alex interjects, fixing the testy teen with an even –though not harsh—stare. “Teenagers shouldn’t have to fight for the future of the world. That’s for adults to handle.”

“No one gets to decide,” Allison grits out, “what my burdens are. And this isn’t about ‘should’ or ‘shouldn’t.’”

The corner of Alex’s mouth twitches. She looks up at Artemis, brows raised.

Artemis sighs. She tips her head back, staring up at the ceiling, then looks down at Allison. “You need body armor to keep you safe. That does not mean, however, that you’ll be joining us in the fight against Thanos.”

Allison sweeps her tongue along the inside of her cheek. She crosses her arms and cocks her head to the side. “Pretty sure you don’t get to decide that.”

“Pretty sure you should listen to me,” Artemis fires back, “since I have more experience and am telling you that it’s too much for you to handle.” She lets out an exasperated breath when Allison rolls her eyes, then waves her hand dismissively as if to say ‘I tried.’ “Get her set up.”

Alex nods, then waves Allison over. “Alright, malenkiy. Let’s get you sorted.”

***

“Are you asleep?”

“Nyet.” Piotr rolls over, drapes an arm over you, and kisses your forehead. “I would ask you the same, but…”

You manage a small chuckle. “Pretty obvious answer, yeah.”

The two of you are in one of the private rooms –if only because (aside from your status as married) it has a bed big enough to accommodate Piotr. There’s a small window that overlooks a cavern beneath the lab. Dim, blue light seeps through the glass pane, but it’s not enough to properly illuminate the room.

Piotr’s fingers skim over your upper arm. “Why are you not sleeping, myshka?”

“Can’t,” you admit, voice wavering. You take a deep breath through your nose and try to calm yourself. “I just… I can’t handle not doing anything. It gives me too much time to think about what might happen.”

Piotr croons gently, drawing you in closer so he can tuck you against his chest. He cradles your head with one massive head. “Dorogoy. You know such things are not good for you.”

“Yeah, I know,” you grumble, eyes stinging with unshed tears. “Doesn’t mean that knowledge stops my brain any.”

“Ya znayu,” Piotr murmurs as he kisses your temple. “But everything is going to be alright, myshka.”

“Except it really might not be,” you argue, voice shaking. You grip the material of his shirt, as though he might be wrenched away from you at any moment and whisked away into the wind. “It really might not, Piotr.”

Your husband doesn’t say anything in response to that. He merely holds you closer still and strokes his fingers through your hair.

You press your forehead against his chest and start weeping quietly.

***

The second day is much like the first –a slow, agonizing crawl punctuated by overwhelming anxiety and exhaustion.

You linger at the table where Nate, Tony, and Ellie are modifying guns, handing the three various tools and materials when they ask for it. You watch their progress numbly, brain devoid of anything other than wordless worry.

At least, you watch until Nate texts Piotr to come get you.

“Davay, myshka,” your husband coaxes as he lifts you off your stool. He grunts slightly as he shifts you into a bridal-style hold, then carries you away from the table and out of the room. “Let’s have lunch.”

“But—”

“Is important to stay fed and hydrated.”

“—I was helping.” You peer past Piotr’s arm –then sigh when Nathan gives you a sympathetic, concerned smile and waves you along. “Baby—”

“Just for little bit.” Piotr sets you down when you ask, but he keeps a hand on your shoulder, just in case. “Is not good to sit and stew in anxiety.”

You drop your gaze to the floor. “You can’t prove anything.”

Piotr lifts his hand from your shoulder and cradles your cheek. He strokes his thumb against your skin, waiting until you look up at him before speaking again. “Come have lunch with me, moya lyubov’,” he says with an adoring smile (which you’re certain is a deliberate, tactical move on his part to make sure you don’t try and argue, and dammit if it isn’t working). “I would enjoy your company.”

You scuff the toe of your sneaker against the floor, but ultimately acquiesce. “Alright. I guess I should take a break.”

***

The snooping starts after lunch, while Alex is chewing Frank out for spray-painting his bullet proof vest.

“What, are you looking to ruin perfectly good Kevlar?” Alex gripes as she tosses Frank’s “Punisher” vest aside. “You want to break down the material? Get shot out like some schmuck because you decided to be an artist?”

“It’s strategic,” Frank argues with a good-natured, crooked grin. “Keeps my enemies’ line of sight trained on where I have the most protection.”

Alex nods and makes a sarcastic noise of assent. “‘Strategic.’ Is that what it is? Ya ne mogu v eto poverit'. V moye vremya my nazyvali strategiyu pobedoy, a ne stavili svoyu grebanuyu vizitnuyu kartochku na kazhdoye sovershennoye nami proklyatoye ubiystvo. Get your ass over here, drama boy.” She scoffs and starts measuring Frank’s chest and shoulders. “‘Strategiya,’” she scoffs. “What a load of horse shit.”

“Akh akh,” Nikolai tuts as he walks into the room with a plate of food and glass of water. “What is happening here?”

“I’m pretty sure I upset the apple cart, sir,” Frank says, unabashed.

Nikolai chuckles while Alexandra brings up to speed, ranting in irritated Russian. He sets the plate and glass on the table next to his wife, kisses her head, then ambles back out to the kitchen—

And that’s when you notice it. Or, rather, her.

Natasha Romanoff, aka the Black Widow. Renowned spy, assassin, weapons and espionage expert, and former member of the Avengers if the debacle surrounding the Sokovia Accords is to be believed.

She’s sitting at the kitchen counter on barstool, tapping away at her phone –which isn’t inherently suspicious, but her line of sight lets her look directly into the room you’re all situated in and—

She’s watching Alex.

At first you think she might be watching Frank (which, fair enough, having a mass murderer, somewhat unstable vigilante around is a reasonable cause for caution). But when Frank gets up and walks out (probably to go find Karen), Natasha doesn’t even move. Her gaze –when she’s not looking at her phone—stays fixed on Alexandra while she works at her sewing machine.

For once, you’re grateful Piotr is as large as he is; he makes a great hiding spot to do countersurveillance from.

Natasha approaches slowly, but deliberately. She talks to someone on her phone –whether she’s faking or not doesn’t matter to you, because she still uses it to get off the barstool and amble around while she’s talking. Then, she has a conversation with Captain Rogers, which she uses to get a few feet closer to the doorway.

At some point, you’re not certain if she realizes you’re watching her, only because she gives up the pretense of trying to hide her snooping entirely. She leans against the doorframe, watching Alex intently while she marks, pins, and cuts out fabric.

It’s Illyana who has enough of the whole thing first. Three minutes into Natasha standing in the door way, the blonde sighs, sets her phone down on the work table, and glares up at the red head. “Kakogo khrena ty khochesh?”

Natasha purses her lips slightly. She acknowledges Illyana with a brief glance, then turns her focus back to Alex. “Alexandra.”

“Natalia,” Alex says by way of greeting, not even bothering to look up from her work. “Are you here to help, or are you here to waste my time?”

She grimaces, but recovers and smiles politely. “It’s been a long time.”

“So, you’re here to waste my time,” Alex surmises as she pins a pattern to a piece of heavy black Kevlar.

Natasha swallows reflexively, then turns on her heel and walks away.

***

Half an hour later, it’s Captain Rogers and Sergeant Barnes’s turn.

The two supersoldiers are far less covert than Agent Romanoff. They stand in the middle of the rec room, a few feet away from the door, and don’t make any attempt to hide their conversation or the fact that they’re watching Alex (and, to some extent, her children and Nikolai as well).

Illyana says something to her mother a few times, but Alex waves her off –and, in general, seems unbothered. “U nas yest' rabota, snezhinka. U nas yest' rabota.”

“Did you know him?” you ask, later, when the Rasputin kids are out of the room. “The Winter Soldier?”

You’ve heard enough through the grapevine to know about the basics of the man’s story –captured by Hydra, experimentation, brainwashing, being coerced into murdering.

(It all sounds chillingly familiar.)

“We crossed paths,” Alex admits with a shrug. She slides a piece of ceramic armor plating inside a Kevlar pouch, then starts sewing the pouch shut. “Overlap was common back in the day.”

“Do you think he remembers you?” you murmur, glancing out at the kitchen (fortunately, Rogers and Barnes are gone for now).

Alex pauses. She purses her lips, then shrugs and resumes working. “I don’t know. He went through a lot with the forced mind wipes. There’s really no way of knowing.”

“Are you going to be in trouble if he does remember you?”

Alex huffs and favors you with a gentle smile. “I’ve gotten out of worse, ptitsa. Don’t worry so much.”

You say that like it’s easy, you think while the knot in your stomach coils tighter.

***

There’s a brief reprieve around dinner. You even manage to relax a little, smiling and chuckling as Piotr and Mikhail bicker and generally irritate each other as much as humanly possible.

Work starts up once more as soon as everyone’s done eating. You nestle yourself against Piotr’s side, relaxed via the virtue of being too tired to be stressed—

And then Tony Stark walks in.

Or perhaps “walk” isn’t the right term. He moves with an air of grandeur and utter self-assurance –which, even with your limited exposure to Tony Stark, you can tell is a “brand standard” for him. He tosses an apple up and down in one hand as he breezes along, expression blasé to the point of looking disinterested as he strides up to the table where Alexandra works.

If it weren’t for Natasha, Captain Rogers, and Sergeant Barnes scoping out the Rasputin matriarch earlier, you would’ve pegged Stark’s visit as entirely coincidental.

“What’s your deal?” Tony asks, leaning against the table next to where Alex is stationed at her sewing machine.

No pretense. No niceties. No attempt at subtlety.

Alex’s lips quirk into an annoyed grimace. She looks up and over the top of her machine for a moment, staring at Nikolai (likely trying to find any scrap of his infinite patience for herself), then lowers her gaze once more and says, “Usually, it’s not answering vague, pointless questions asked by nosey individuals.”

“You’ve got half my team twisted up just by being here,” Tony continues, unruffled. “I’ve seen Romanoff stare down the Hulk on a rampage without flinching. What about you is so special that you make her nervous?”

“Interesting,” Alex comments, almost to herself. “And here I thought, after the Berlin incident, your ‘team’ was largely disbanded. Something about ‘not agreeing with your leadership.’”

Tony’s face twitches, mouth briefly stretching into a pained grimace before he smooths it back out. “You don’t exist.”

“Everyone’s concept of self is different,” Alex mutters as she rips out a crooked seam on an armor pouch.

“There’s no record of your birth. Or your parents, for that matter. Your marriage license has no given maiden name. No history of education, doctor’s visits, driver’s license –nothing until you turned twenty-four.” He takes a bite of his apple, swallows, then says, “People don’t just ‘poof’ into existence as full grown adults. It doesn’t happen.”

“Perhaps,” Alex retorts as she resews the faulty seam, “you are just not very good at finding things.”

“I can find anything.”

“Except, it would seem, a way to keep from trying my patience.”

Tony watches her for a moment longer –then, when she doesn’t say anything, he turns and starts striding out of the room. “I’m going to figure out what’s up with you. There aren’t any secrets that can hide from my A.I.”

Alex doesn’t dignify his departure with a response –but her eyelid twitches as she continues her sewing.

You look up at Piotr, only to find he’s watching Nikolai. You look over at the Rasputin patriarch, and your heart sinks when you see the worried expression on his face.

Nick sighs, then stands and rounds the table. He ambles up behind his wife, drapes his arms around her shoulders, and kisses the top of her head before he starts murmuring to her in quiet, loving Russian.

You lean against Piotr’s side, giving him a reassuring squeeze even though the only thing you feel is disquieted. You force yourself to take a deep breath and relax your jaw as fear starts crawling up your spine once more. One thing at a time. One thing at a time, that’s all you can do.

Except, it seems, when everything decides to happen at once.

***

Meeting the Norse god of thunder is… intense.

Though, that may have to do with the entourage of people he brings with him.

Around three in the morning, Dr. Strange shows up with the remaining allies –Thor, god of thunder, and his brother Loki, god of magic, Bruce Banner aka the Hulk, a woman by the name of Carol, and a group that calls themselves the “Guardians of the Galaxy” (which happens to include a talking raccoon and a sentient tree).

“Just when you thought, like, it couldn’t get weirder,” Kitty mutters to you as she stares at the newest arrivals.

You nod. Granted, your usual metric for all things weird is Wade, who has basically explored every avenue of zany, bizarre, and disturbing—

But yeah, this is pretty fucking weird.

“Where do we stand in preparations for the arrival of Thanos?” Thor asks Tony.

“We’ve got most of the busywork done,” Tony says, outlining the weapons upgrades and the armor work that’s been done. “We waited for major planning until we had everyone here and better intel.”

Thor nods, then gestures to two women standing with the “Guardians of the Galaxy,” one with green skin and dark hair and the other with blue skin and cybernetic enhancements. “This is Gamora and Nebula, daughters of Thanos. They’ll be able to provide information on the strength and size of his forces.”

“Good,” Steve pipes up from where he’s standing with Sam Wilson and Sergeant Barnes. “The sooner we have a plan, the better.”

“It can wait until we’ve slept,” Alex decides, voice crisp. “We won’t come up with anything good while we’re fried.”

Tony blinks, then scowls. “Thanos could be here as soon as this coming morning.”

“Then we’ll be doubly fucked if we’ve stayed up all night trying to scrape together a plan,” Alex replies, unmoved. She crosses her arms when Tony glares at her. “The younger and less experienced of us need rest if this is going to work.”

“I’m with the lady,” Quill pipes up, brushing past Tony. He gives Stark a smile that, if you had to wager, is supposed to be charming but just comes off as arrogant. “I think you’ll find that we… don’t really roll with plans. It’s not our style.”

Alex stares at Quill for a moment, expression vastly unimpressed. She sighs, blinks slowly, shakes her head, then turns on her heel and strides back to the room she’s been sharing with Nick. “Absolutely not. I’m going back to bed.”

As if waiting for a cue, everyone else disperses, muttering about being tired and “needing an IV drip of espresso.”

You shuffle off with Piotr, hand in hand, shivering slightly from nerves. Please just let this go well.

***

“Both the Chitauri and the Klyntaar forces number into the tens of thousands. The Chitauri have sentient airships capable of carrying infantry forces while wreaking their own havoc, in addition to chariots that can carry up to five marksmen at a time. He also has tanks the size of this building that can demolish anything in their path.”

Everyone is gathered in one of the main work rooms. A majority of the people present hang back at the fringes, content to watch while Tony, Captain Rogers, King T’Challa, Alexandra, your uncle, Thor, Quill, and Natasha hash out a strategy.

“He’s trying to overwhelm us with sheer numbers,” Steve says in response to Gamora’s information.

“It might work,” Natasha murmurs, gaze focused on the worktable in front of her. “We don’t have near enough firepower to chip away at that many grunts.”

“Not if we play our cards right,” Alex says, crossing her arms over her chest.

“There’s also our siblings,” Gamora adds with a pained grimace.

Off to the side, Nebula scoffs. “They’re hardly family.”

“Thanos collected beings throughout the galaxy to serve him,” Gamora explains. “To act as his eyes and ears and eliminate his foes. Aside from Nebula and I, he has four other ‘children.’ They’ll be acting as his generals and commanders in the fight –and helping him track down and capture the final infinity stones.”

Tension ripples through the room.

“What do we know about these Infinity Stones?” Alex asks after a moment of fraught silence.

“The stones were originally created by the Celestials,” Loki pipes up from where he’s leaning against a wall. “Their magical properties are tied to aspects of the universe –time, space, reality, and so on. Only beings of immense power can wield them without severe consequences.”

“Thanos has the gauntlet that accompanies the stones,” Thor adds. “With it, once he assembles all six stones, he’ll be able to use them simultaneously.”

“He wants to wipe out half of all life on Earth,” Gamora says, voice wavering slightly. “That’s been his single goal ever since I’ve known him.”

“All men want to be gods,” your uncle jokes half-heartedly.

“Can the stones be broken?” Alex asks.

Loki chuckles, incredulous. “These are magical tools created by the most powerful beings ever known to the galaxy… and you want to break them?”

She shrugs. “Best not to overlook the simplest solution.”

“I’m taking that as a ‘no,’” Steve interjects. “So, if we can’t destroy them, how do we fight them?”

“The only thing powerful enough to combat the effects of the Infinity Stones are the Infinity Stones,” Loki answers.

“And we only have two,” Natasha surmises, expression drawn and grim.

“Three.”

Everyone looks up and turns when Illyana speaks.

She smirks, tilting her chin up when Natasha meets her gaze. “We have three Infinity Stones.”

“Vision has the mind stone, and Dr. Strange has the time stone,” Kronos argues, shaking his head. “The soul stone is still missing.”

Illyana’s smirk broadens. She lifts her hand, curling it as if she was holding something.

A sword materializes in her hand –and in the center of the sword, small but unmistakable, is a glowing orange gem.

Your uncle’s eyes widen. “Holy shit.”

“Three,” Illyana repeats, looking supremely confident and self-satisfied. “Unless there is elusive seventh stone?”

Loki smiles ruefully, shaking his head. “The Goddess of Limbo pulls through. Well done.”

“Okay, but Vision’s stone is in his head and Strange has his stone in a necklace around his neck,” Tony interjects, gesturing to each person in turn.

“Amulet,” Dr. Strange mutters under his breath.

“Your stone disappears if you’re not holding it,” Tony continues, pointing to the sword as Illyana dematerializes it once more. “What’s stopping Thanos from finding it and taking it?”

“I am only person who can use Soul Sword,” Illyana says, arching her eyebrows. “It is bound to me until the next in my line is ready to take my place.”

“My family has been bound to Limbo’s magicks for generations,” Nikolai clarifies when Tony starts sputtering. “Illyana is the keeper of the sword, which means only she can call upon it. Thanos would need our blood to have access to it.”

Tony grimaces. “Still risky.”

“Better than nothing,” your uncle fires back.

“We have a shot of taking down Thanos with the other three Infinity Stones in our camp,” Steve says, planting his hands against the worktable's surface. “Without them, we’re as good as sunk.”

“Well then,” Alex says, smirking. “Let’s make sure we don’t waste our opportunity.”

***

“For the love of god, stop talking.”

“I’m just saying,” Quill starts, spreading his hands in a defensive gesture.

“You’re not saying shit!” Alex snaps, lifting her head from her hands to glare at him. “You’re just wasting our time!”

Once the planning started, a large portion of the crowd dispersed to help wrap up the last of the weapons modification. The leaders from each faction stayed behind –Tony, T’Challa, Steve, Natasha, Thor, Peter Quill, Xavier, your uncle, Alexandra, and Erik—to plan, along with Gamora, Nebula, and Loki so they could offer up information on Thanos, his forces, and the Infinity Stones.

You’d also hung back, since you didn’t have the skills necessary to do the weapons modification. If all I can do is sit around like a nervous lump, may as well do it where I won’t be in the way.

“This plan just isn’t our style,” Quill argues, either immune or completely ignorant to the exasperated sighs and death glares the others are giving him. “We like to take things looser, add a little pizazz.”

“How many times did your parents drop you as a baby?” your uncle asks, staring Quill down. “No, I’m serious,” he adds when Quill glares back at him and opens his mouth to argue. “I’m genuinely at a loss for how you can be this fucking dense.”

“We’re up against overwhelming numbers and powers no one here has ever seen, let alone fought against,” Natasha adds. “We need to allocate our resources carefully if we want even a chance at victory. The three wave strategy is our best chance.”

“Okay,” Quill says, pressing his hands together. “I think we just all need to relax—”

“You’ll be pretty fucking relaxed when I gut you,” Alex grumbles as she pinches the bridge of her nose.

“Look, the way I see it, Thanos can’t take us all at once!” Quill reasons. “If we hit him with everything we have—”

“We have to survive his armies, too,” Tony adds, words clipped. “Or there won’t be any of us for Thanos to be hit by.”

“No.” Alex glares at Quill when he keeps trying to argue, startling him into silence. “Look at them.” She points at Gamora and Nebula. “These are your friends, da? Your teammates and companions, da? This is their abuser we’re facing. If we lose, what do you think happens to them? Do you think someone that wants to destroy half of all life will have mercy for them? Hm? If you care about them, you pick the plan that has the best shot of ensuring their safety. Got it?”

Quill swallows reflexively. He stares down at the holographic display of the future battlefield, jaw working. He exhales through his nose, slow and stuttered, then nods. “Alright. We… we do the three wave strategy.”

“So glad we can agree,” Alex says, turning her attention back to the battlefield schematic. “Now, we were discussing where to put our snipers…”

***

“—I need both their arms. Trust me, it’s the only way this is gonna work.”

“Look, I’m normally all for a little dismemberment, but I don’t think forming our own amputee league is gonna net us a win here.”

You shake your head as Wade banters back and forth with the talking racoon –whose name is Rocket, apparently—then look over at Nathan. “How long have they been at this?”

“Going on three hours now,” Nate replies. A soft, endeared smile flits across his face when he looks at Wade, but his expression sobers when he resumes his soldering job. “How’s the final plan looking?”

“Everyone but Quill was leaning towards a three-wave tactic.”

Nathan grunts. “Yeah, he seems like a jackass.”

“Alex threatened to gut him.”

“Hey!” Wade shouts, sounding genuinely wounded. “No disemboweling without me!”

“Quill wanted to do an ‘all for one’ attack directly on Thanos.” You sit down next to your dad, studying his face while he works. “You’ve actually fought against these people before. Do… do you think dividing our forces up will actually work?”

“The issue is the land and air forces,” Nathan says, shaking his head. He attaches a power unit to the base of a rifle, then starts welding the compartment shut. “This time doesn’t have the necessary shielding to repel the Chitauri and Klyntaar forces for that long. We’ll have to fight the grunts; holding some of our people back to make sure we have someone to take on Thanos is our best bet.”

“That doesn’t necessarily mean we’ll win, though,” you point out.

He offers you a melancholy half-smile. “That’s war, kid.”

Your heart sinks further. “Do we even have a chance?”

“Statistics says we do,” Nathan says he strips a piece of wire before threading it into the gun.

“That’s not what I asked.”

Nathan sighs. He looks at you for a long moment, then says, “I think we have the best shot possible with what we have right here, right now.”

You gulp, then nod. It’s still not technically an answer to your question –let alone a positive one—but…

You’ve learned that, sometimes, it better not to dig at these sorts of questions at all.

***

“We’re dividing our forces into thirds.”

You’re all crammed into the rec room post dinner. In the center of the room, by the counter, Tony, Steve, Natasha, and Alex are addressing the crowd in turns.

“The first wave will consist of high stamina fighters and snipers,” Steve says. “There’s a shield system that extends several hundred kilometers around the lab’s perimeter. Wakandan soldiers will join the line of snipers who will pick off any of Thanos’s forces that make it through the shields.”

“We’ll also have any fighters with enhanced stamina on standby, in case there’s a larger breach,” Alex adds. “Their job will be to protect the sniper line from being overrun by the enemy forces.”

“The second wave will be air support,” Tony continues. “Myself, Rhodey, Wilson, and any flying mutants will head out when the Chitauri airships come in. Princess Shuri has a fleet of attack drones at the ready, which can be manned from headquarters in the lab. HQ will have a complete look at the battlefield; all intel will be coming from them during the fight.”

“Third wave is everyone else, save for Illyana, Dr. Strange, and Vision,” Natasha says. “We’ll join the fray when the second wave of Thanos’s forces arrive. The final three” –she nods to Illyana, Dr. Strange, and Vision in turn—“will wait in central headquarters until Thanos arrives, to prevent early capture of the remaining Infinity Stones.”

“In the meantime,” Tony says, “we’re going overtime on modifying rifles to be sonic weapons. They’re more effective against the Klyntar forces than regular firearms. All hands on deck. If you can’t solder, you can run supplies back and forth and help perform diagnostic tests at the firing range. Clear?”

Everyone nods, then breaks off to start working on constructing and testing more “awesome guns.”

You slid your fingers between Piotr’s. Your heart’s in your throat, racing a mile a minute. Your mouth feels dry.

If you were the religious type, you’d start praying. As it is, you make a plea with the universe on the off chance it decides to listen to you –for once.

Please. Please just let this work.

***

“So… about the three-wave plan—”

Tony slams down the compartment piece he’d been working on against the table. He glares at Quill, face strained with barely constrained rage and impatience. “What the fuck is your deal?”

“It’s just not sitting well with me,” Quill continues, leaning against the table. “I’m more of a ‘solo moment’ style person. More of a lone wolf.”

You gape at him. “You… you work with a team of five!”

“I just think that there needs to be a more focused confrontation with Thanos. Y’know, for someone to challenge him, man to man—”

“Some get this idiot out of my face,” Tony snaps, looking around for anyone that might be willing to assist –or, at the very least, drag Quill out of the room by his jacket collar.

“You’re not listening to me!”

“You’re wasting my time!”

“Why does every problem come back to you?” Alex stalks into the work room, eyes glowing a dull shade of copper as irritation takes hold in her. She strides over to Quill, looking like a menace in black leather and Kevlar. “How much more of a nuisance can you possibly make yourself?”

“I’m just pointing out some flaws in the strategy!” Quill argues, holding up his hands in a defensive gesture. “I’m being the devil’s advocate!”

“You’re pointing out dick,” Agent Barton, alias Hawkeye, points out from the side (where he’s modifying some of his arrows to release sonic pulses).

“Look,” Quill presses on, ignoring Clint’s comment. “We need to make sure this thing is airtight—”

“We don’t have time for ‘airtight,’” Nathan growls, cybernetic eye flaring. “The goal is to survive, not to create perfection.”

“I really just think—”

Alex scowls –and then her hand snaps out and closes around Quill’s neck. She slams him against the edge of the table, sneering down at him while he coughs and claws –futilely—against her iron grip. “You’re past the point of being a nuisance. You’re a fucking liability.”

Quill wheezes, face slowly turning red.

“If I was paid every time a man like you told me how to do my job…” Her voice trails off, and she lets out a sardonic chuckle. “Let me make something clear to you, Peter Quill.” Her hand tightens around his neck, which makes some ominous creaking noises as she presses against layers of tissue, cartilage, and bone. “I am not about to have an asshole like you risk the lives of my children, the people who are putting their own lives on the line to protect the world, or the future of the damn universe. If you’re going to keep being a jackass about this…” She smirks. “I’ll kill you. I’ll do it right here, right now. I am not going to have a hazard like you on my team or on that battlefield.” She grins nastily, leaning in closer as Quill’s eyes bug out. “Best thing is, no one really knows you’re here. No tracks to cover, no family to pay off, no authorities to worry about. You’d be an unfortunate casualty in war. No one would fucking miss you.”

A chill runs down your spine. You gulp, stomach twisting as you look from Alex, to Quill, to Alex again. Is anyone going to stop her...

“I really don’t know how to make this any fucking clearer, but since you’ve proven to be thick-headed, I’ll summarize: you stray from the plan in any way, and you’re dead. Got it?”

Quill nods hastily. He gasps when Alex releases him, collapsing to the floor. He hacks and coughs, one hand rubbing at his throat while his skin slowly fades away from an angry magenta color.

“So glad we understand one another.” Alex smirks, then turns on her heel and strides out of the work room like nothing even happened.

You purse your lips, trembling while everyone goes back to work like nothing even happened. You try to focus on sorting pieces into containers for the fabricators to grab from, but with your shaking hands it’s near impossible. You duck your head, gritting your teeth together as your stomach churns angrily. I just want this all to be over.

***

The call comes in a couple hours later.

“We’ve got temporal disturbances outside the shield perimeter,” Kronos shouts while alarms blare overhead. “Thanos’s forces have arrived and are attempting to break through to our location.”

Your stomach drops as everyone starts scrambling. You grab your flight jacket and goggles, throwing them on haphazardly. You start running towards the hangar –then stop and switch directions. “Piotr!”

He pauses when he hears your voice, turning and catching you as you leap into his arms. He kisses you briefly –desperately—then pulls back and cups your face in his hands. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.” You give him a quick hug, then pull away and start sprinting towards the hanger where the rest of the air support is gathering. Tears sting your eyes, but you wipe them away and force down your fear and preemptive grief. Focus. You have to focus.

It’s time.

#sass writes #piotr rasputin x reader #nathan summers x wade wilson #alexandra rasputin x nikolai rasputin #kitty pryde x illyana rasputin #aka my 'fuck you' to the russo bros #get ready for some big canon divergence #i am literally just doing whatever the fuck i want #deadpool fanfiction #x men fanfiction

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