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west-tokyo-incidents · 2 years

Text

It hurts like nothing else. Especially in the moment. But they hadn't been expecting another hard blow months and months later.

CW; major character death, mutilation, torture, pregnancy, birth + related difficulties, mourning, grief, etc.

"I can't believe you did this to me again." Paresse groaned as he rubbed at his temples. The migraines were the worst part of the beginnings. Rage gave a heartfelt and apologetic expression, leaning over to kiss his arm. Paresse had taken another pregnancy test a few days ago, and it was positive. Today had been the second test, and it said the same.

Paresse just rolled his eyes, sitting next to his wife, "Yeah, I know, I know." He leaned back, "But it's not like we can't take care of it, and this fucker–" He jabs a nail against Rage's leg, "--has been wanting another anyways."

Fussa chuckled from her place on the couch as she watched, "You decided to keep it." Her smile made the creases in her face deepen.

Rage laughed and sat in his lap, running his hands over Paresse's still-flat belly, "I'm kind of surprised, we've been using protection."

"Eh, a condom probably broke just a little and we didn't catch it." Paresse just shrugged, "I'm having Dunstan shut off my cycle after this one, though." It was an empty threat, really. He'd threatened the same thing after Jupiter, too.

Fussa made a small noise and looked Paresse over, but didn't say anything. Not right now, anyways. She and Paresse had fucked a month or more ago and didn't use protection. She was old now, though. So it probably didn't mean anything, but it still hung in the back of her mind. She didn't want to interrupt the two as they discussed how to break the news to the others, to Jupiter, though she did give a few suggestions of her own. She'd talk to him about it later.

Later being after she took a trip to a little butcher shop that she loved on the edge of their territory.

She should have taken Rage with her. She'd slipped out on her own, wanting time with her thoughts. Mulling over and rehearsing ways to bring it up to Paresse that his second child might be hers. She picked out a few cuts and talked about anything but work with the butcher. He asked where her bodyguard was and she waved it off. She had something to tell her husband after his, so she was in a hurry. She'd figured out a way to tell him after she got back.

She had hyped herself up and was ready to go as she left and headed down her usual short cut, now thinking about what she'd ask Paresse to cook for her.

She wakes up for only a few minutes, but it's been hours since she was knocked out. Everything hurts. Everything. She can barely see, something is so fucking bright in front of her.

She took a steel bat to the back of her skull.

People are talking. She flinches and tries to focus. What the hell is going on…? It takes almost all of her time awake to wrap her head around what's happening. She's far from as sharp and as healthy as she used to be.

The bright thing is a hologram, and it's hard to focus on. The other Incidents are displayed on it. Mizho, Paresse, Rage, Vice. It's a live feed. And she can only imagine she's being cast back to them. A hostage situation. She'll be rescued. They'll pay the ransom for her.

… Rage is screaming something at them.

Something cold is on the side of her head. A gun.

"We will give you anything!! She hasn't done anything to your crew, we have!! She's retired, leave her out of this!!"

The horror in Rage's voice puts a rock in her gut. Paresse's next words seal the deal.

"I'm the one you're mad at, I'll take her place–"

This isn't a hostage situation.

Paresse is pregnant. He wouldn't say that lightly. He's trying to negotiate a way to get closer to them. To kill them… before they can kill her. Realization makes her head shoot up, eyes locked on Paresse and seeing the sheer panic and despair on her husband's usually stoic face.

This is an execution.

She tries to say his name. It's a hoarse strain against her gag instead. He looks at her anyways. She can't stop the tears that start falling. Her captor says something.

Her eyes flick down to his stomach and her chest heaves in a sob. What if she was right? What if it's hers? What if–

She hears a click.

It only hurt for a moment.

—

Rage's scream rips through the office. Fussa's office. Paresse can't even croak, watching his wife's body just… crumple in the chair. The hologram cuts out. Paresse stumbles back and holds his head in his hands. Mizho can't speak, either, but she's shaking. Vice has grabbed Rage.

"... it was faked… it has to be, they're not stupid… they wouldn't…" Her eye turns to look at Rage. He's practically clawing at his chest, only Vice able to keep him from it, forcing Rage into an embrace to keep him from tearing himself apart. No, it was real. She knew that frantic sobbing. It was the same way Vice had sobbed when he first came back after Kia's death.

That's it… she's all that's left. Kia and now Fussa… she knew it was only a matter of time but…

"Mizho…?" A voice that crackled, a broken voicebox. She looked at Paresse, who was reaching for her. Her shoulders slumped and she reached back, letting him pull her into a hug. No, she couldn't do that to him. Not on purpose. He was the only one left with a master, now.

She'd always, always planned to be the first one to go in a great blaze of fury, to burn her match down from both ends and end it with a great, disastrous flash in one final hoorah. … she supposed she could make this her last. Drag these bastards into the deepest pit of hell with her, kicking and screaming.

"We need to get her body." Paresse muttered into her ear. Rage was in hysterics, so he was being quiet, "We can't let them fuck with her body we have to find them. Now."

Fury blossomed on Mizho's face, her face creasing in a twisted way. He was right.

"Vice and I will. You stay with Rage."

Paresse doesn't answer for a long moment, then, "On one condition; you're not allowed to die."

"I won't. I'll have the twins. I'll have Vice."

Paresse pulls away and grabs her shoulders, looking her dead in the eye, "Listen to me. You're not. Allowed. To die. Do you understand?"

She knows what he's thinking. He knows she'd never planned to live this long anyways. Normally, she'd reprimand him for making an order to his queen… but she meets his gaze evenly, "I'm not going to die. After all, I still have one more kid to train, yeah?"

Surprise and then a broken smile. Paresse nods, "Damn right you do." He lets his hands fall off of her and turns away. He gently kneels next to Rage, who's finally screamed himself out. Rage latches onto him instantly, and Vice's eyes meet Mizho's.

—

She nods. It's been five years since Kia's death. There had been no vengeance then. No cathartic explosion of revenge killing for either of them. Maybe it was cruel to Fussa that they were thinking of Kia, too, but they had five years of grief festering under their skin, and this new wound was making the puss ooze and boil.

It took only an hour to locate where the broadcast had been sent from. Less than that to get there.

Fresh, ungodly sick rain slicked the streets. Trash floated along the sides of the street and disappeared into the sewers. The baying of hounds on the hunt echoed off cars and windows. Oil floated in the water and made it shimmer and ripple. Brick and concrete turned dark in the wet.

The baying stopped. Gunfire and shouting rang out like a bomb, and ended just as quickly. Something darker and thicker than rain and oil was spilled in droves. A small gang would cease to exist. Bodies are dragged through the muck. Some unconscious, most dead.

One body is carried, draped in a tarp to protect it from the rain.

—

Three men wake later, suspended in the air with their arms stretched out behind them, almost far enough to dislocate them, straining tendons at the very end of their limits. Arranged in a semicircle in a plain, windowless, ventless room, featureless room, they can all see each other… and start to scream at one another. Each accusing the others of getting them in this situation. All sorts of things are being slung, back and forth. Echoing off the empty walls and bouncing around.

They don't see the two tone eyes of their captor, standing in plain sight. They're all so focused on each other, selfishly screaming. And he lets them go at it. He listens to their voices start to strain, to crack. Finally, one spots him and goes dead still, causing the others to pause and look, too, at the looming man in the corner.

He is stood at attention, eyes focusing on the men with a hardness that can only be drilled into a person by years of training. He isn't wearing a shirt, nor is he covered in wrappings. His pants are black, plain. Keeping attention on his upper body. The exposed flesh is decorated with ink upon ink.

With a quiet precision, he moves from his place, standing in front of the men. Once again at attention, "Do you know who I am?"

Serpents and bulls and fish and turtles and owls and dogs. Guns and skulls and lyrics.

All flickered and shimmered in the light of a room that had gone deathly quiet.

The silence is louder than their argument had been.

"I asked a question."

His eyes flick between each of the three. One finally explodes, the one on his right.

"Yeah, I fucking do! You're the fucking dick who killed my sister! Blood for blood, asshole!"

The man slowly turns his head to look at him. And stays silent. He doesn't flinch when he's spat at. He looks to the next man, "What about you? Do you know?"

"...you're the guy who offered his life in place of the guy we killed…?" He weakly offered a guess, shrinking away from that gaze. The gaze that then turned to the third.

"And you?"

The man can't speak, and just shakes his head, looking anywhere but at their captor.

"Then let me introduce myself." The words fall out of his mouth like blood drips from a corpse's wounds. Slow and coagulated. No heartbeat behind the cold drip. Just the inevitably of gravity dragging it down, "I am former lieutenant Fussa Paresseux, Karakuridouji of Sloth. My former master, Michel Dubois, and I still hold the highest success rate of any seek and destroy unit that has ever existed in the Japanese military. My current master is Mizho, one of the two queenpins of the West Tokyo Incidents. She and I have killed hundreds more, for far less."

Dread enters even the one on the right's face. They all know his name, save for the addition of the surname. The man lifts up his right hand and runs his thumb over a silver band on his ring finger, his eyes never falling from them.

Silence. None of them will meet his gaze now, contemplating their fates.

"And you killed my wife."

One of them has the sense to shake their head, answering him.

"Do you know who she was?"

"Fussa Fusataro was a topside music producer and former rockstar. She was famous because she had clawed her way out from the underground as a trans woman and made a name for herself. She was loved and admired up there. Her music was featured across Japan and across the seas."

Another pause.

A pause, dragging out as one of the men begins to sniffle in fear, "She was the greatest informant the West Tokyo Incidents had. She escaped the most brutal justice system Japan has to offer while she was guilty as fucking sin. She was smart as a whip and clever as a fox."

One of them chokes as emotion finally graces his voice. A deep, crackling snarl full of both rage and grief. Paresse doesn't budge for a long time. And when he does speak, the snarl is gone. The flat tone becomes almost sympathetic. Almost. More mocking, really.

"You shot her in cold blood in front of her own douji, her friends, and her pregnant husband."

"You were just poor lowly thugs in the wrong place at the wrong time. You didn't know who I was. You didn't know I was married to the old woman you kidnapped. You didn't know who she was. You just knew she was associated with me. You just wanted to hurt me. You saw me panic when you started that holocall, and you decided you wanted to hurt me more. Congratulations." His tone is dead. Flat. "You achieved your goal. You have hurt me more than the gunman who shot Michel."

He slowly blinks, but none of the men see.

"But you didn't look to see how deep the water was. All you had to do was find out who she was and do a little more research. Ask around a little. People would have told you not to mess with her. But you just saw an opportunity and took it, didn't you?"

Silence.

"I have a funeral to attend, but I won't leave you alone for long. There's a couple people who'd like to introduce themselves as well while I'm gone." He puts the phone back in his pocket, "I'd highly suggest treating them with respect." He steps back and away, then walks to a door they can't see and exits.

"Answer me!" He suddenly snaps. They all rapidly nod, tears falling from some of their faces. Paresse just hums, then he straightens his back, having slipped into a slight slouch. He rolls his shoulders and glances at a phone, at the time.

Leaving them alone. Suspended in the air with their arms stretched out behind them. Almost far enough to dislocate them. Straining tendons at the very end of their limits. Arranged in a semicircle. In a plain, windowless, ventless room, featureless room.

—

Paresse exits the room and picks up his shirt, sliding it over himself. He straightens it and makes his way across the hall, to a room where the rest of the remaining Incidents are, and the ones who will be.

Mizho, Vice, Rage. Jupiter and Chihiro.

Jupiter and Chihiro don't exist in any record. They can't attend the funeral being put on for the public, no matter how Jupiter protested being left behind for his mother's funeral. All the Incidents have false identities already relating them to Fussa and Rage has no need for one, so they can all go. But he'd made a compromise with the two young ones.

Paresse's eyes fall on them. He holds up one finger, "You have one rule, you two. Do not kill them. The longer they live, the more they suffer. Understood?"

"Understood."

—

Paresse is silent through the whole thing. He watches others come and go. It takes a long time for him to be able to go up to the casket. He knows she's wearing the rings, and that her hands are positioned just so to hide them. Rage sits with him, all of the rest have gone up and paid their respects already.

Some people come up and ask their relation, they just parrot off their false identities. Paresse doesn't talk, but Rage vouches for him and that's enough to keep people off of him. It doesn't help that his stomach has been warring against him all day. Stress on top of the pregnancy was doing him zero favors.

The place is almost empty when he finally stands up and walks over to her. He's the very last one before the casket is closed. He leans against it. The mortuary people had done a good job hiding the bruises and setting her broken jaw. The other wounds hidden under her suit. Her hands folded over her chest. It doesn't feel real. She doesn't look real. He hated funerals just for that.

Rage waits by the door, arms behind his back. He watches Paresse reach in, and knows he's changing which hand is on top, exposing the rings. He makes a little face and sighs. He really should have left it be. It was already dangerous leaving the rings on her at all. If anyone saw the connection, matched their rings together… it could be the connection someone needs to know exactly who they are. But he knows Paresse isn't thinking about that. Probably isn't thinking about much at all.

Paresse flinches at the bright light as they exit the funeral home. As heat rolls over him and makes his stomach churn. He wavers in place, a hand going over his mouth.

But Paresse also closes the casket and steps away. The staff at this place are all paid off, he doesn't imagine they'll do anything now that it's closed. Rage decides not to say anything.

"Babe? You okay?"

"Too damn hot… I'm gonna be fucking sick again."

Rage leads him to a spot in the shade and he sits, arms around his stomach. Fortunately, it passes without him retching, but he decides against attending the burial. Rage feels obligated to, but Vice nor Mizho stay either.

Paresse rides in the back, a hand rubbing small circles into the muscles of his abdomen.

He goes to his room… but immediately turns and leaves.

It still smells like smoke.

—

For the next four months, all three men are kept alive. Force fed and half drowned to keep them hydrated. They're used to teach Jupiter and Chihiro about torture, kept alive at the very ends of their wits. Taught when to know someone is about to pass out or drown or just straight up die. Paresse teaches them how to dislocate joints and reset them.

One dies at the four month mark, Chihiro cutting too deep. Vice uses his body to teach the kids how to butcher and Paresse teaches them how to cook human flesh.

Paresse is definitely showing now, a noticeable bulge in his gut. It's been rough, but he attributes that to the grief and stress. Phantom pains and cramps abound. The nausea never really leaves like it did for Jupiter after the first few months. But he doesn't take check-ups with Dunstan or Pardonner. It's a douji/douji child, after all. Little risk compared to Kia's pregnancy, right? Jupiter had gone off without a hitch, so Paresse was confident he knew what he was doing now. He's just stressed.

Things have calmed by that four month mark. Fussa's job had long since fallen to another topside informant by the name of Akira after she'd officially retired, but he isn't permitted to use Fussa's old office for work. The office is still used for their meetings, but Fussa's desk is untouched unless it needs dusting. The smell of her favorite smoke sits in the wood like a ghost.

Another month passes and Jupiter suddenly snaps at one of the men remaining. He becomes a bloodstain. Jupiter's noh was rarely used. But the man had said something regarding his unborn sibling and metal turned his body into mush. Rage chastised him, but the tone of his voice makes it obvious that if Jupiter hadn't done it, Rage would have.

The third and final was Paresse's kill a few days later, and it was quick. They were tired of their playthings and the last man was given an undignified death, as pitiful as he was. Shot between the eyes like a lame horse.

—

Something goes very wrong in Paresse's last month.

It's the dead of night, the chill of winter keeping him bundled up tight. Rage is topside, working, so he's also alone. Curled up in the corner of the bed where it met the corner of the room. A warm cup in one hand and a pencil in the other, casually sketching. Headphones in his ears playing some of Rage's music. It's a peaceful night. He's not thinking about much of anything.

And then he shifts his weight and pain rips through him.

He screams. Mizho hears him, feels the echo of pain. She's already dialing Kiyose's number. It's some kind of blessing that Vice and the kids have already fallen asleep and don't wake from his scream.

There's so much blood. Why is there so much blood? Why is it red?? Douji don't bleed red!! It's a nightmare, it has to be, it has to be…!! It hurts so goddamn much!!

The moment Pardonner finally arrives, he sees and immediately gets to work. Kiyose tells Mizho to call Rage, sends her out of the room. Paresse is inconsolable and Pardonner has to knock him out, his noh sending the man right into a deep sleep.

"What is happening??" The older woman snaps, turning rapidly to face her once the door clicks shut. Kiyose keeps a straight face with a gentle, patient smile.

He knows what's happening. He only hopes it won't be stillborn. That he arrived in time. He focuses on his work, cutting Paresse open with careful movements. Once she's satisfied that he won't need her for a while, Kiyose steps out of the room to a pacing Mizho.

"Paresse has been pregnant with a human/douji hybrid, not a pure douji child. He's lucky they made it this far. They'll have a fighting chance this late, but it's possible that they won't make it…" Kiyose trails off.

Mizho is taken aback. The information processing a little at a time. "It's not Rage's kid."

The moment she says it, said man almost broke the door downstairs, storming in. Kiyose feels Pardonner call for her and she gives a little bow before going back in to assist her husband.

Mizho stares at the door as she hears Rage practically fly up the stairs. She spins around and slams a hand into his chest to stop him from running past her into the room. And stop he does, dead in his tracks. He knows far better than to disobey. But his eyes are frantic, darting between her and the door, pupils dilated from the suffocating smell of blood.

"Rage…" She starts, "Was Paresse only sleeping with you and Fussa before she died?"

"What– yeah, of course. I mean Vice sometimes with me and Ress but…" He sputters, "Why?"

—

Paresse comes back to and the world is spinning. He hears crying. His whole body aches, but especially head and his stomach. His stomach– his baby, where is his baby…?? He tries to sit up but a hand stops him as adrenaline returns to his system. A very bloody body is pressed against his chest.

"...it's a girl." Pardonner says, sitting back and watching, "She's premature, but she's healthy. You should have come to see us, we could have caught this and told you sooner."

Instinctively, he knows without seeing and wraps his arms around the newborn, eyes closing as he holds them. Panic bleeds out of his system and is replaced by joy, even as they scream. They're alive. His baby is alive.

Caught what…? Paresse opens his eyes, looking down at his baby… and froze. She has a headful of dark, black hair.

"She's a hybrid. She needed to have special care in the womb, like Chihiro."

Her crying slowly turns into little whimpers. Paresse runs a hand over her little cheek. He slowly curls around her, tears beginning to fall. She looks up at him… with rich brown eyes. A sob runs through his body and it hurts. His stitches protest as he holds the little one close and tries to keep from sobbing too hard. Kiyose smiles softly.

"I'm going to let Rage in. Is that okay, Paresse?"

He nods weakly.

Pardonner stays off to one side, on standby, as Rage comes in. Kiyose joins him once the door is closed again.

Rage quietly sits next to Paresse on the bed, gently rubbing his shoulder. The little girl looks up at him… and little tears start falling from him, too.

"She's Fusataro's…" Paresse manages, looking at Rage through his own tears. Rage smiles softly and nods.

"We're going to need a different name."

#ress writes #damn this one hurted #cyberpunk au #read the warnings

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redlips-blooddrops-deux · 7 months

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🤗Are they physically affectionate? 🎶Do they have a type? 😡What are their deal breakers? ↕️Are they sub, dom or switch? 🏷️Do they give their partners cute nicknames? 💋Are they more sensual or sexual? 💚Are they prone to jealousy? 😘Does their demeanor change when in a relationship? 👫Do they display affection in public? What about in private? 💕Are they open to threesomes or a polyamorous (Both lily and vinny ❤️)

🤗Are they physically affectionate?

/She can be depending on the lover, but she is definitely someone who relishes the physical touch. Of course, in public, it's a bit more restrained, but once she is in private with her lover she does become quite handsy.

🎶Do they have a type?

/ You could say she has few types but what she is most attracted to is charisma, power, ambition, confidence, and witty humor. Truth to be told she rarely goes for opposite characters unless they are fun to bother. She likes a bit of a challenge and power struggle, if someone is too unresponsive she gets bored quickly.

😡What are their deal breakers?

/Do not try to change her or boss her around. She has lived long enough and done plenty of things that most people won't approve of, to sneer and look down on her is not wise in the long run.

↕️Are they sub, dom or switch?

/She's a switch for sure! Though most folks for some reason love to have her as a dom which she usually does oblige to with much glee. But sometimes after a long day, she wants to be spoiled and maybe for one night in a week let someone else take the lead.

🏷️Do they give their partners cute nicknames?

/ Oh yes, she does start with typical love, darling, cherie, etc. But once she knows her partner she does make more unique ones!

💋Are they more sensual or sexual?

/ I'd say sensual, she likes to feel and appreciate her partner and the moment they are sharing. Making the foreplay a bit longer so that she can take it all in, their touch, sound, scent, what clothes they are wearing, how their hair feels under her touch. You know things like that ;)

💚Are they prone to jealousy?

/ She can be, just hides it very well. This bish does not show it openly and can be as cold as a winter's day to the point of avoiding her partner. Oh, you think you can do better than me? Then go for it....prideful woman to say the least.

😘Does their demeanor change when in a relationship?

/Lilith becomes a bit more softer to her partner, smiles more honestly, and generally seeks out her partner when they are not together. Would hold their hand or arm the moment she sees them. Deep down she is quite a romantic woman just one has to be patient to reach that point with her.

👫Do they display affection in public? What about in private?

/A little bit in public, arm holding, cheek smooches, gentle strokes nothing too over the top. In private she is definitely affectionate and she is not shy to show at all.

💕Are they open to threesomes or a polyamorous

/ She is fine with threesomes for fun, as long as there is no big emotional connection. Truth be told she can be a bit selfish and isn't eager to share her lover unless there is a really special situation but even then she might be a bit reluctant.

🤗Are they physically affectionate?

/He can be, a bit reluctant sometimes, but if he is in a good mood and depending on a partner yeah he can give them a bit of a cheeky smooch on the cheek or something else. Usually does that when nobody else is looking~

🎶Do they have a type?

/Someone opposite of him for sure he is a pretty cold and stoic person. So he usually is a bit more attracted to those who are honest, direct, and open with their emotions. Also, someone who is a bit more softer than him is attractive to him and it does rub off him eventually.

↕️Are they sub, dom or switch?

/This man is a dom most of the time and he will rarely let anyone else take the lead. It might happen once in a blue moon but yup no way this man will let someone else hold the reins.

🏷️Do they give their partners cute nicknames?

/He does, usually in his native language to make it more special and he gives those if he really is interested in a person.

💋Are they more sensual or sexual?

/I'd say he is somewhere between both and it all varies on his mood of the day. He can be a tease and take a while to get into business he enjoys seeing his partners beg. While other times he wants to have a quick fuck and proceed with his work.

💚Are they prone to jealousy?

/ Not as much as Lilith, he would prefer to make things clear. Wait for a private moment to talk and ask the fuck are they doing or if they are not serious about what they are doing. He hates beating around the bush and would rather know where he is standing instead of wasting his time.

😘Does their demeanor change when in a relationship?

/ He becomes more caring, checking up on their partner if they are okay health-wise, financially, and whatnot. Will take them shopping or to massage anything to make sure they are being taken care of to the maximum!

👫Do they display affection in public? What about in private?

/Again in public to an extent, and when not many people are watching, the man got an image to keep ya know. In private it's a different story where he does reward his partner with kisses, embraces, and all that tenderness~

💕Are they open to threesomes or a polyamorous

/Eeeehhh, for him it will take a whole lot of convincing. He prefers to focus his time and energy on one person and make the best of it, dividing it for him is exhausting and will make him eventually loose interest xD;

#ic #answered #about muse #right hand man Vincent #hope these help ya out babe -w-

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iridium-daydream · 2 years

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Dude you are a FUCKING asshole. Ask the parents of those dead children if those memes are “harmless”

Actually, I genuinely think that if you showed those parents that meme, that some would be able to see the humor in it. Because the subject of the meme isn't the children, it's the cops.

Again, as I've said before a couple times now, this is a touchy thing to make a meme about. Even if the children aren't the subject, they are still part of the meme, and not everyone is going to be comfortable with that. And that is o k a y. Not everyone has to like everything, and just because you dislike something doesn't make it morally bad. It could be, but it's not a given. I'm actually surprised how many of you think it's joking about the children?? Because to me, that's pretty obviously not what it's doing.

The meme is based off of the original art, which depicts a grim soldier kneeling, arms outstretched, in front of a sleeping child's bed. While the child sleeps peacefully, blissfully unaware of what's going on, the audience can see that behind the soldier he is being struck with a myriad of weapons, which will likely lead to fatal injuries. Thus the original image is a genuine depiction of Heroic Sacrifice, of those in authority protecting the innocent, who are unaware of the danger they are being shielded from.

The image was then memed to death, with people usually just pasting text in front of the soldier, child, and weaponry, to denote something being protected from something else. These were (generally) funny because the things being referenced were never as serious as the original context of the image. A dog protecting his owner from the mailman is not the life and death sacrifice the art was trying to convey, so it's ironic.

This meme, which has the same image but with the weaponry unlabeled, the soldier labeled "kindergarteners" and the child labeled "Texas cops", goes beyond that. Because now the situation is indeed a life and death situation, just like the original artwork, so the humor is not in the direct irony of using such an image for a meme. So what is the point of it? The point is then in the flipping of positions, that now the stoic soldier is labeled "kindergartners" and the sleeping child is labeled "Texas cops", but that flip is not enough to generate humor. After all, if this were a fictional concept, something being pitched in a screenplay, no one would find it funny. People would just find it sad. Not only sad, but unrealistic. "Come on, like any cop-no, like any adult in their right mind would stand there and do nothing while a child needed help?!"

But it did happen. "Truth is stranger than fiction." People have been watching awful shit play out in front of their eyes and been unable to do anything but laugh and shake their heads since forever. We've all seen the footage: 20-30 cops, people whose jobs it is (supposedly) to risk their lives to protect the innocent, had a chance to save schoolchildren, literally the most innocent of all. And they fucking stood there and waited and did fuck all for nearly an hour, and now all those children (and teachers, teachers also died there) are dead, those families are shattered, that community will never be the same again. And what consequences have any of them faced for it? Practically nothing.

And so I bring you back to the meme. The flip in roles is not enough to make the statement, it's the fact that it was allowed to happen. That it wasn't just "one bad cop", but all of them, that they were ordered to stand by and wait because god forbid one of them get hurt, right? That the city tried to cover it up afterward by hiding footage, by doing its damndest to try and shield its officers from any sort of consequences in the aftermath. The fact the that cops, as state authorities could have done anything they wanted in this situation with nigh total immunity, and what they chose to do what become like the sleeping child in the meme, safe and sound, no longer innocently unaware of danger, but selfishly hidden away from it. And the children are thrust into the position of the soldier, previously a position of Heroic Sacrifice, where someone in a position of strength chooses to take on risk to protect those that are most vulnerable, now it is a position of plain Sacrifice, where someone else has chosen to surrender it to destruction because it is seen as expendable. And because this meme has kept the grim stakes of the original art piece, but so thoroughly perverted the roles these groups were meant to play, and this is factually how it happened, it draws your mind to "How the fuck did this even happen???"

And it's only once your mind gets there, past the tragedy of the murdered kids, and past the rage at the cops, that you might let a bit more air out of your nose than usual because what the fuck else are you meant to do? How are you meant to exist in the world as it is today, with all its senseless tragedies: death, violence, climate change, fascism, political turmoil, poverty, etc. if you can't laugh at how absurd it all is? How else are humans meant to cope in a system that's designed to crush everyone except those at the very top?

So bringing it back to your original ask, I think if the parents saw this, while some would find it distasteful, just as you do, I think some would also see the humor in it, laughing at a system that thought those cops were the ones that needed protecting, and that their kids were capable of acting like soldiers and shielding them.

Tldr: it's gallows humor, a thing that has been around since before you were born, and will be here long after you die. Life sucks, and sometimes you just laugh at it?? If it's not your thing, that's fine! But jfc, don't do internet harassment over it. literally, the bare fucking minimum. the bar is on the floor, please do not limbo

#tw school shooting #uvalde #reading comprehension test: just because something is in the set up does not mean it's the punch line!!!#is it a great meme? no! this is not the sistine chapel of our era folks #but is it a pretty basic gen z edgy humor meme? yeah #does it deserve saying the person who reblogged it (not even the creator btw) doesn't deserve to live??#your answer to that will say a hell of a lot more about you than about them imho #discourse s1ep1

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hhjs · 3 years

Text

love or lack thereof.

pairing — felix x reader

genre / trope — angst, fluff / exes with benefits.

word count — 7.7k

warnings — suggestive, heavy implications, swearing, some making out but no actual r rated stuff but i will say this is suitable for 18 and up audiences.

note — this is unedited, subject to change. spare me lol

There are two sides to every person. The side that you want people to see and the side that you keep to yourself.

You think you've come to discover all those aspects of Lee Felix. Given that he's sweet, unassuming and inexplicably kind to the naked eye but you know, the rising anger in you knows he's only ever been cruel to you.

"Move," you seethe, he moves to let you in but you unintentionally knock your shoulder against his. There's people on the subway, and you hate the way Felix's innocent gaze finds yours for a second and it makes you look like the bad guy.

You feel the disapproving glare of a grandma who has a crumpled catalogue about seasonal pie recipes on her lap, as if she can't believe how much of a cunt you were being to an absolute stranger.

A roll of eyes follows, fishing for your ear phones, if only they knew.

Seeing your ex boyfriend outside of your casual deal hits you with the force of a punch to the gut. But you hid it exceptionally well. Arrogantly jutting your chin upwards. Whilst he cowers beside you, having supposedly caught your sour mood.

To think you had spent an hour with him in a bedroom just formerly...is rather strange. You've been sleeping with him for the past few months now and where it had begun is slightly mysterious to you — was it Chan's birthday party or a clubbing gone wrong one night stand just after Felix had come back to town....? You aren't entirely sure.

Albeit the arrangement is ingrained in your head — what you have with him is a secret strictly kept from your friends who otherwise if even caught air of a mere conversation between you two would invite an influx of queries. This is simple, physical, you don't have time for a relationship, let alone one with him and to mend how utterly lonely you are with someone who hasn't already seen you naked, someone who you couldn't blindly trust, is too much work.

Even though Felix is indubitably affected by your unwavering indifference, something he wasn't used to when you were together because of how giving you were to sate his utterly needy tendencies. Now he feels himself clawing at your hardened exterior in search of just those affections to no actual avail —hurt crossing his eyes when you sneak out of bed without saying goodbye, when days pass and you don't call or text and most importantly, when you're in public and you can't be bothered to spare him as much as a glance. To you, it's nothing more and nothing less. You make it a necessity to keep reminding him.

See you liked to pretend you're a resilient person. That in your heart you really do forgive people and move on.

But he is an exception.

"Did you eat?" He perks up, his voice is small. Careful.

You keep your stoic expression, looking ahead. "No."

Then he blinks, like he usually does when he doesn't understand why you act the way you do. Impolite, communicating only in monosyllables.

Do you really hate him that much?

There's a hoodie pulled over his black hair, longer along the neck,headphones dangling from his neck and his backpack in his hand, he hopes when he holds onto the same railing as you are, that your fingers should brush just a little.

Despite the way you adamantly ignore him, Felix opens his mouth to utter a passing inquiry. Your jaw clenches. And you desperately begin to scan the city map plastered inside to navigate passengers to their destinations.

"Can we...do you want to get something to eat..." He swallows, "together?"

As if he's crazy for even making such a proposition, you look at him once but from the corner of your eye and he thinks that's a lot considering how often you look past him, through him, never at him. You shake your head, giving him a warning stare.

Across from you, his reflection is frowning at your negative response. Still staring at you with a marveling gleam in his eyes, how much you've changed over the past two years just as he has....still takes him by surprise. Suddenly and unexpectedly, his eyes flicker to yours and he finds you staring at his image against the glassed doors. And like a deer caught in headlights, your heart drops to the depths of your stomach.

The announcement above falls deaf to your ears as you exit in a blind rush of sheer panic. Ignoring the biting cold and unfamiliar station. Your stop is still quite far. Maybe you'd have to take the taxi... or walk.

But in the face of all those hassles you sense yourself feeling incredibly relieved...because frankly, you think, you could go to hell and back if gets you away from him.

—

"So you came to tell me you're just gonna give up? Is that it?"

Felix carefully glances at you through his lashes, silently pursing his lips as to convey the answer.

You stare at the speckles of light kissing up his freckled cheeks, his big beaming eyes, a slightly low bridge but rounded tip of his nose paired with a small upturned mouth.

You can't believe you won't see him again.

Whenever he'd catch a break, he'd take the 2 hour bus to town and come see you, meet you and those once in six months meetings alone, to you, compensated for his lengthy absence.

So it couldn't be the distance, you thought, if that were the case he'd have dumped you when he moved to the capital for university.

Felix just doesn't want to be with you anymore.

"You don't get it...." He closes his eyes, as if he doesn't want to see himself saying what he is about to say, you almost don't get the resistance in his tone. The subtle drop of his Adam's apple. "I don't want to hurt you." He starts, "Just think about this rationally... we're so young, what if I find someone else there?"

Someone...else?

Is it that easy to dispose of you? Aren't you enough?

How foolish of you to only ever think of him.

It felt like Felix was kicking you where knew would hurt the most.

Your sardonic laugh is cracked, garbled and it's so fucking embarrassing that you're crying in the middle of a fast food joint, your fries have gone cold. Had you known seeing him this time would be vastly different from usual, you wouldn't have ordered at all. Why didn't he tell you before? Why had he insisted on catching you unawares?

But then again...this isn't about you at all. This is about Lee Felix. This is about him reducing your worth to make room for himself.

Ultimately, you understand, what is worse than not being loved back is being loved by someone who doesn't love you as much as you do them.

"Well I won't stand in your way then,"

You clear your throat,

"Fuck..." you rub your temple, the sadist in you coughing up hysterical laughs. The ache inside your heart at this point has turned into physical pain, cracks fissuring out against its surface and gnawing at the flesh like its being torn apart at the seams.

You should've seen this coming.

Everyone told you and told you you could only drag on an opposites attract sort of relationship for so long before you start to realise how incompatible you are.

Felix has the audacity to reach over and place his fingertips on your knuckles,his eyes are sad, overflowing with pity. It makes you feel small, the way he looks at you, small, sad and abandoned.

What tips you over the edge, however, is how calm he seems, as if he had been precisely planning to dump you for days and months and years while you continue to make a fool out of yourself never have forseen his decision.

There are tears running down your cheeks, abusing your vision with a vicious sting. You bring your sleeve to collect the needless moisture in a sudden rise of temper that is oh so typical of you.

You snatch your hand away from his touch.

"Don't touch me." You say, the simple comment transfers pain to Felix's eyes, mouth parting in silent words. You want to scream at him, you want to shake him by the collar and tell say something, just say anything at all and I will forgive you. Goddamnit.

In a perfect world, you think, a world where things happened exactly the way they should, you wouldn't have said, instead,

"And don't you fucking dare come back here...ever again."

And...in that very perfect world, he would've listened.

—

Felix thinks he could, dare he say, love everything about you. Even though you most certainly deserve someone who hasn't hurt you the way he has.

Now it's funny actually, how the tables have turned...back then, he wasn't sure about you and now you aren't about him.

Felix doesn't really blame you though...because he knows he asked for it.

Your presence in his life has somehow become an absolute necessity to say the least. And ironically enough, while he had so confidently pushed you to let go of him, he realises he had been holding onto you all along.

Now what was he saying...again?

Right. Felix loves everything about you.

But what he loves most...is the way your hand instinctively finds his heart when you're kissing. It's just a simple movement of your fingers splaying against his chest, the warmth of them seeping through the fabric of his shirt. He doesn't even know why it means so much to him.

His hand drops from your ass to the back of your thighs to situate you closer to his chest. He moans into the kiss when your teeth comes to scrape against his bottom lip, your ministrations are typically rough and speedy but he is seemingly far too absorbed by the exhilarating feeling coursing throughout his entire form — it's not just blatant lust, he knows, but a much deeper understanding that he is inexplicably gladdened by the fact that he's touching you and you're touching him.

A shaky breath leaves Felix's parted lips as he cranes his neck to allow your lingering kisses to shift along his angular jaw.

Then without quite meaning to, his vision focuses on the table clock that reads it's well past midnight...you had run late tonight for reasons you neglected to disclose. Now that he really focuses, a strong musky fragrance akin to unfamiliar men's cologne wafts up his nostrils.

It couldn't be....

As Felix's suspicions run deeper, he restlessly begins to search up every aspect of his surroundings as best as he can in the limited provision of light. There is a large coat discarded on his bed, one he hasn't seen you wear before...then again it might not be yours at all...

You notice how he's stopped responding to you, so you pause, leaning back, still on his lap. "Is something the matter?"

Felix swallows, blinking up innocently at you. This deal is simple, isn't it? He knew what he was getting into the first time you got together and the second and the third and so on, so why had the possibility of you getting involved with someone else even bother him then?

Both of you knew why.

And what's worse is that Felix is sensitive by nature, never truly succeeding to hide his emotions, especially intense ones when faced with them. So he is hyper aware of the fact that what he is feeling in the moment is not jealousy, it's neither anger nor resentment but a deep seated insecurity that he will lose you.

Again.

"Were you...with someone?"

As expected, your hands resign from cupping his face, you avoid looking at him.

"What?"

Felix clears his throat, his accent thicker, voice heavy from disuse. He thinks about something being with you in the same way only he has...and it causes a dull ache inside his chest.

He rests his head back against the sofa and shrugs lazily. As if to prove a point, as if to say did he touch you here? his fingers ride up your t shirt, gently cupping your ribs, he tries not to look too satisfied when you quiver under the touch.

Still you lift yourself up and the sudden lack of contact almost makes him whine.

You stand before him. A hand at your hip.

"Why are you acting like this?" You say and he notes you sound more... curious than annoyed. Though what frustrates him is that you hadn't answered his question. "I thought I made myself clear...there are rules we agreed upon."

Oh he knows — no staying over, no personal questions, no jealousy.

Felix purses his lips. The downside of your forwardness, the same utterly admirable trait he finds really fucking hot, the one that conditions you to tell Minho off when he hogs all of Felix's brownies though the latter himself is too much of a pushover to say anything, the same one which had in times of recurring doubtfulness assured him of your strong feelings towards him, is that you say whatever comes to mind without sparing anyone's feelings.

"I'm just asking, [........]," he lies, trying to control the pain from projecting itself onto his voice. It hurts to see the way you jump to defend yourself around him, as though you're scared he'll hurt you again. The lack of faith you have him, after all this time, causes him hurt. "Why are you getting so upset...."

Felix is gentle. Communicating his feelings through his actions rather than words, cooly, slowly. And you are the exact opposite — there is an immediacy in your conveyance, a roughness. You mean what you say and you say what you mean so you think everyone does too. Which is why, he concludes, his present actions are insufficient to remove the seeds of resentment he'd left in the wake of his bitter utterances when you broke up.

But Felix was only 18 then, a kid completely unaware of his overwhelming need to have you in his life....what matters is, he's trying...he really is, to recover from his mistakes......shouldn't that least matter?

Thinking the slight inhibition in his tone is just a figment of your imagination and that he is simply and indifferently inquiring you, you feel a wave of embarrassment wash over you. Then you drop down on the bed, feeling for his remote.

You sniff through your nose and against your better judgement say, "I went out with an acquaintance,"

On weekends Chan usually wasn't home, you could come over. This is the routine, it has been for some time now...so, you've come to know Felix's room more intimately than your own, the walls are a deep blue, like the kind of blue out of a Holly Warburton painting. There's an old Coldplay poster on the back of his door and X-Men action figures from eons ago lined on the edges of his bookshelf.

You know where everything goes when though it's dark. But that doesn't mean anything.

It shouldn't.

"A acquaintance who gave you their coat midwinter...you must be close,"

You ignore his pointed comment, he ignores the way your eyes light up when you talk about this acquaintance.

"He's nice." You say, "He walked me to the station and everything."

A happy hum comes in response.

Because when was the last time you talked to him as freely as you are?

Felix plops down on his stomach beside you, elevating his form on his elbows. His fingers come to brush loose strands out of your eyes. Your gaze meets his for the second time that week. Slower. As if you hadn't minded looking him this time. He feels his heart being tugged at all possible angles.

Then, because he can't stop himself — he leans down and kisses you, tentative and indolent, like he has all the time in the world, like all he wants to do is kiss. Don't get him wrong...you've done downright unspeakable things with him, to him...but nothing mediates his adoration for you without the employment of speech like these little chaste...purposeless movements. His fingers coming to splay against your neck, thumbing along your throat when you gulp, the tip of your nose brushing against his cheekbone, eyes fluttering shut. They're...they're intimate. Utterly special. He knows you feel it too, from the way you look slightly surprised, searching his face, eyes skimming up any fragment of emotion conveyed in his features. But you don't encourage it, slowly shifting to turn your back as you lay quietly against his chest.

"Let me stay here tonight," you say, "I'm tired."

"Okay,"

Felix thinks you've broken not one, but two rules now. He hadn't expected you to answer. He hadn't expected you to get into bed with no intention of departing either.

Though he doesn't hold it against you, this is what he wants, for you to open up to him again...after all. These changes can't be bad changes, even if they are little, it's still progress...right?

—

You wet your fingers, dipping the moistened muscle against the clay mold. All around you is not as eerily quite as it is in your apartment, footsteps thrumming against hardwood floor, kiddish humming from the kitchen, the smell of sugar in the air, you've never worked outside of your home station and well...in class. You thought of yourself as a self sufficient individualist, you liked to believe that you didn't enjoy other people's company like you did your own, with the exception of your roommate. But that's only since you aren't close enough for her to disturb you.

Yet with Soomi moved out for good, the place felt...odd to stay by yourself.

So you found yourself spending more and more time at Felix's. It's nice to have a place to crash in every now and then, the sex is great and when you get hungry after, you don't have to think twice about scouring the fridge.

You don't know why you put off spending time aside from sleeping together at all, more time spent didn't necessarily add to your deal or subtract from it....because the action itself doesn't really mean anything. Everyone gets tired of being alone at some point. That's a universal fact.

Initially, you told yourself your presence was a consequence of Chan catching you two in the shower one night...so now that the cat's out of the bag, you two figured his place could become the only premise you didn't have to play pretend in. You both knew the elder would be more than willing to keep the younger's secret even if he didn't exactly approve of it.

With the increased frequency of your visits, bits and pieces of you remain dispersed all throughout the apartment, your body wash in his bathroom, your underwear in his laundry, the smell of you in his sheets, on his clothes. You had relaxed yourself through the periphery of his life and he had small glimpses of yours, habits and flaws, unknowingly...or knowingly....whatever. — Felix could only thank God that Chan had found out, in spite of the revelation itself putting you both in a compromising position.

With time, he starts to keep a few secrets from you too, here and there, knowing that if you knew you will stop doing it altogether. He can't have that...

You throw a leg around his hip when you're fast asleep, flinging an arm not a second later to cage him in your warm embrace. Felix likes the way your chest rises and falls against his back, how your breath tickles his skin and your mouth parts against his shoulder blade. Sometimes he stays awake and waits for you to do it, then when you do, he grins so hard his face hurts a little. Felix likes being the little spoon.

"Are you listening?"

His vision narrows down to the sight of you holding out your palms in the air, there's wet clay on them, as well on your cheek and legs, between them your pottery wheel is halted to desuetude, there's old newspapers layering the floorboard to prevent staining.

"Sorry...," he smiles sheepishly, "What did you say?"

It's your turn to shift your gaze to your feet. Felix thinks it's highly uncharacteristic, the way you seem almost...shy?

"Can you..." You eye the mug mounted on his study desk, he catches onto your request easily, "I'm thirsty—"

"Yeah yeah hold on... careful," Felix chirps, carefully guiding the rim to your lips to make sure it doesn't spill. He uses the tip of his thumb to wipe the corner of your mouth, you flinch first but then whilst the mild shock subsides, simply stare up at him as the pad of his thumb brushes against your skin. "There you go..." he trails, eyes bright with care.

You feel like a child being doted on, the mere emotion plunging you back to when you were 5 and had crushes on boys who shared skittles with you.

"Thanks."

Felix's ears perk up at the courtesy, you were never one to express yourself easily and when you did, every time, he felt inexplicably delighted.

The apples of your cheeks feel hot for some reason, by putting yourselves in in these small situations, you keep confusing him, you know, because you keep confusing yourself too.

You come out again that night but this time Bang Chan is shifting around in the kitchen. He hardly sleeps, you observe, but probably refusing to come out because he wanted to avoid bumping into you.

Chan doesn't seem to like you very much. Probably. You don't blame him. Before you came along, Felix and he spent more time together, now you had become a constant in his life without will.

You have to listen twice to realise he's speaking with you. Not an invisible being behind you.

"What?"

"I said..." His tone dropped dangerously low, he looks annoyed at something. "Listen I don't care what you're doing but don't hurt him." He's wearing a black t shirt and a pair of pajama shorts with cartoon wolves littered all across the baby blue fabric. He's trying to appear intimidating. It's not really working.

You stifle a laugh.

Frankly had you not known how deeply he cared for Felix, you'd not have cared about his advice. Or warning....?

"Fine," you respond, watching as the tension visibly left his body with one bating breath. "I hope this isn't about me stealing your yoghurt though."

"It's a little about stealing my yoghurt," he jokes, you think he's one of those people who'd apologise if you punched them in the face and spat in their drink. It's interesting...

Chan laughs a little. His eyes sparking with amusement for the first time of all the times he's looked at you. Did he trust your word that much?

—

"He talks about you a lot you know,"

You nearly spit out your drink. Seungmin isn't exactly the densest guy you know. Far from it exactly and he isn't discreet either. So your first instinct is to think he knows something.

You watch Felix from a distance, a solo cup in hand, he's laughing at something Hyunjin said, there's a crinkle along the bridge of his nose and his upper lip curls upwards to reveal his teeth. In reality, in everyone's eyes, your lives are separate. They walk on eggshells around you still...you assure yourself there's no way anyone could've guessed.

So you play dumb, glugging the whiskey into your cup. It spills around the edges, landing on the semi-lit neon counter.

"Who?"

Seungmin blinks at you. An unreadable expression on his face.

"Jisung." He says, "Who else?"

You feel yourself getting less excited, the breath you were unconsciously holding passing your entire form. Jisung is the newest addition to your life, a performing arts student who offered to portrait model for a project you'd been given in class. He's cute, forward, which you like a lot. And you notice whilst using him for inspiration, that he looks at you just as attentively as you had at him.

Only for different reasons.

Jisung asks for your number. You say yes. Half-heartedly. Though at the forefront of your mind you keep comparing everyone to the guy you go home to ever so often, you pick out their flaws and their perfections and you think to yourself he isn't like this, he is like this.

"Yeah?" You pose, sipping and wincing. "What did he say?"

"Just the usual stuff...." Seungmin tilts his head, he's not drinking tonight because he has an exam tomorrow. You think it's a little funny that he's carrying around water in a solo cup. "But I can tell he has the hots for you,"

You laugh this time. That's no surprise to you. "Well he's not so bad himself."

Seungmin narrows his eyes, shooting you a suspicious look.

"Of course you'd say that...." He taunts, "Heard you guys hung out...how was that by the way?"

"It was alright. Sort of just...happened. We bumped into each other and he offered to buy me dinner."

"And you...said yes?"

You give him a blank look, sarcasm dripping from your monotonous sentences, how else would you have spent time together?

"No, I didn't, Seungmin,"

The owner of the name rolls his eyes at your satirical comment, "No need to be mean, I'm just a little surprised is all."

"Surprised?"

You raise an eyebrow, Felix is still in your line of sight, it looks like he's stalling, waiting for your conversation to end so you could leave. He glances at you a few times and you quickly text him a 5 more minutes. "Why's that?"

"Cause every time you start to have feelings for someone, you take one step forward and ten steps back," he points out, "Think about it...you haven't been in like an....actual relationship after...well, you know," he postulates.

You glare at Seungmin, your pride somewhat injured.

"Hey! I've....dated."

"No....you slept around with people, that's not the same as dating." He retorts.

You snort.

Wouldn't you know.

Minho changes an upbeat pop song to something mellow. It's in a foreign language...maybe Spanish, you understand nothing but you don't have to to know it's a sad tune, the lyrics coming together in a melancholic harmony. Your eyes drift away, you feel your attention falter.

It was not unknown for you to have absolute control over your life, be it living your days by strict routine or building such a sturdy pretentious armour around yourself so that your organic self remained unscathed underneath. You had learnt the hard way that being yourself in front of other people would only bring you hurt...but if no one really knew you, no one could hurt you.

This game of hide and seek had become such a long standing practise in your life that it disconnected who you are from who you pretended to be. And every time the extent of your actual desires, monsters much beyond your control rose to the surface, they brought you shame, disgust.

You found those pretences withering away, the shell of protection around you falling apart whenever the thought of Felix crossed your mind. — his heavy noise of content against your neck, his fingers curling into your sheets, his open mouthed kiss against the arch of your hipbone, everything and anything...you had again, despite all your abrasions, become madly consumed by him.

And you must admit to yourself that you are becoming quite ridiculous because of it.

In this strange moment, you realise you almost need Felix to harp on about you even though you specifically asked him to keep all that you have a secret. You want his friends to come scurrying to you to start telling you that he cares so much he can't keep his mouth shut, to be so enamoured with you that his innermost feelings become painfully apparent, that it's utterly stupid of you to not see how he feels about you.

That's not how it goes though. Stuff like that only happens in movies.

Felix responds, texting, "Take all the time you need." Surprised, you steal a glimpse of him, but only when Seungmin isn't looking. You didn't know what you expected, something more crude, that would give away that he was jumping on the balls of his feet to only get into your pants, that would remind you that Felix is nothing but your fuck buddy. You find that you always look for reasons to resent him....because if you did, it meant that you didn't have to acknowledge how you're still in love with him.

You knew what you were in for. And hoping, wanting something more....is no more than wishful thinking.

Felix smiles at you, a genial smile, a simple curve along the corner of his lips which conveys patience, but also something deeper, like...understanding.

Again no matter how much you pushed him away he seemed to find his way back to you in some fashion, just to convey that your union is not all as black and white as you told yourself it was.

You down the entire drink in one swig. Seungmin makes a face at you, the kind he makes when you stick your fries in ice cream for shits and giggles,

"Well....we broke up a long time ago," You hiss at the awful taste stinging your throat, sounding slightly angry. You can't believe it matters still, but when you've been clutching onto something for too long, be it a painful emotion or a memory...you start to think it's the locus of your life, an integral part of you. It terrifies you to think who you'd become without it — vulnerable, malleable, sensitive.

You can't do that again.

The last few weeks, regardless of how good they were, didn't change a thing.

It couldn't. You wouldn't let it.

Seungmin is right, you think, you are taking ten steps back. Just not in the context he thought.

"There's no reason I shouldn't start now."

—

Turns out there is a reason.

Jisung asks you out the next day. He's so friendly that you feel overwhelmed. At all times of the day, he dresses like a frat boy out on his morning jog. A nike running shirt and loose fitted trousers, a baseball cap worn the other way around...it's a little silly.

You don't mind it, having the kind of apathy you would have towards someone you don't know very well.

Everything with him feels new, awkward. But also slightly exciting. He talks too much when he's nervous and you notice that he's almost always nervous because of your personality, as though he can't really put a finger on you and doesn't know what to do about it. Besides...he’s not a horrible kisser either, you muse, he just doesn’t know what you want.

Yet whenever you heard yourself thinking those compliments, you couldn't help but feel utterly guilty, a strangely deep seated feeling that you were doing something wrong.

Why did you feel this way....

Felix isn't your boyfriend anymore. You don't owe him any form of loyalty. You knew that. You're someone who sticks to their gut feelings and your gut had decided that something about seeing Jisung didn't feel right and not just because of Felix, but because you're not interested in a relationship just yet. And you're sure he could tell you aren't, he shouldn't quite expect a call back anytime soon.

"I had a nice time," you say, because it's true. He took you out for ice cream and bought you candy floss when you stared at it for too long.

When Jisung doesn't respond for a hot minute, you follow his trail of vision, which instead of focusing on you, has shifted to the semi-lit backdrop of your apartment. He's too obvious.

"Do...you want to come in?"

He flounders a little at your suggestion, embarrassed. "Would that be alright?....if I did...."

"That depends, are you gonna kill me?"

You say with a straight face. No matter much Jisung prodded at your exterior, you wouldn't budge, like you usually hadn't. Unravelling isn't really your thing so....he can't tell if you're kidding or not.

"No...?"

You snort, "Why do you sound so unsure?"

Jisung's face has grown impossibly red, he could feel his ears burning in indescribable shame. You just have this air about you that makes you incredibly hard to read and it's really attractive.

"I....I didn't..."

You keep your voice, steady, calm, "Relax," "I'm just screwing with you," you say, stepping aside for him to enter, "Make yourself at home."

—

You suppose you were born to study the arts.

You never could consider yourself a studious being. When you were in school, you remember falling behind in classes where the arduous process of revising was required, say mathematics or the sciences even.

Though that realisation hadn't come to you naturally.

Your parents wouldn't take kindly to you not taking up a "well paying" profession and you fell victim to the constant barrage of criticisms, of mockery which ultimately conditioned you to think some part of you, a large part just wasn't good enough.

And with Felix gone....

You were at your worst.

The two years you spent without him were the hardest, a set of years that obliged you to protect yourself from all the hurt around you, inside you. And while the security that you provided yourself is undoubtedly necessary for well...anyone, the process itself had its wicked way of rendering you unspeakably lonely.

You agreed to apply as an engineering major to gain your parents' approval and then transferred to the arts department by the time you'd successfully moved out. You haven't spoken to them ever since...and it hurt you more than you would deign to admit.

When your mum drops over for a surprise visit and chances upon your ex-boyfriend loitering about in your kitchen, fixing up midnight munchies, she takes a natural guess that you've gotten back together. (Which you think is far more agreeable than the truth. Knowing your mother, a staunch supporter of your relationship with him, she wouldn't take lightly to your arrangement.) And before you know it, you're all having dinner.

Felix makes an effort to dress up well, discarding his usual hoodies and joggers for a more formal look, you suspect it has something to do with the fact that you haven't attended any casual settings with him since you broke up.

Cutlery clinks against ceramic, coming down with a semi-loud thump as you try to swallow the enormous lump in your throat. Your mum makes a passing jab at you, saying how you had settled for a much "easier" major than say architecture or philosophy, she bitterly mentioned that everything worked out in the end. After all, your choice is a "much fitting" field of study for someone of your caliber, backhandedly insinuating that you're far too stupid to pursue anything else.

What inspires hilarity is how those insults still affected you. In front of Felix, you act like these few years have brought the fighter out in you and here you are trying to blink away the onslaught of tears prickling your vision. It feels like someone stripped you off your skin, off your flesh and picked out all your shortcomings for him to see.

You expect him to stay quiet, you expect him to think of you as the utterly shameful, selfish being you tell yourself you are,

But Felix's fingers find your shaky knuckles under the table where they rest on your knee, he implants the weight of them in a reassuring squeeze. "Well I think it's great," he says instead, smiling cheerfully at your mum. To which she, for the lack of support, sheepishly beams at him, "Not many people have the drive to do what they want to do. Or know what they want to do...take it from me, Missus [.....]" He laughs nonchalantly, the hairs on the back of your neck standing to attention upon hearing the lovely sound. You always liked his laugh, the sound rippling against your naked skin, thick baritone when he'd just woken up and a kiddish falsetto when he's extremely happy.

You wonder when you started paying so much attention.

Felix glances at you, lingering for a long minute."I bet it took a lot of guts."

You feel your chest constrict with a sudden surge of emotion from the mere look, you can't remember if the Felix you knew in the past, or anyone for that matter, had ever beamed at you with such pride.

You wonder what he'd think if he knew about Jisung, why you had neglected to tell him at all....you knew, because this little moment is precious to you and you had no reason to tarnish it. Not when you had time.

You tilt your head, using your free hand to hastily find the back of his neck, drawing closer to him with little strength. The more he realised what you're doing, the more excited he got. See he found your newly introduced public display of affection immensely attractive, though obviously embarassed by the sudden motion...

You can do crazy things sometimes. Really crazy things. In public and he has never opposed to such exhilarating things, be it in restrooms or even in a similar setting when you were dating, there was a certain thrill to it which drove him to the brink of insanity. Felix would silently implode your attention when you were alone and when you were out in the open, in whichever way he was to receive it, the way which insinuated you were his was the best of them all. All that was fine though...because it was just the two of you.

But now...in this indecent time, he wishes he could hear what you're thinking.

Had... had you gone completely mad?! Your mum is looking!

Your face is stoic, Felix's mouth parts, then you reach over and kiss him shamelessly.

Over the years, all the things that have caused you pain were things you had endured on your own, in his absence. This realisation alone invites a heavy conviction inside you.

Because you know it just as well as he does, no matter how sincere he is to you — you don't need Felix. Not really.

But you want him.

—

You do a stupid thing. A stupid endearing thing and Felix's heart beats like it would jump out of his mouth if he opened it.

It was meant to be a secret, what you two have, a matter of uncomplicated lust which didn't require the attention of anyone because it initially or so you put it, wasn't important enough.

Then you charge to him, he supposes it has a little to do with the person who was blatantly flirting him in the middle of Changbin's Halloween party, he doesn't care though.

You don't like embarrassing yourself, so he doesn't actually expect you to wear a black cat hairband matching his white ears and feline tail. Felix wants to think it means something, how despite the coos and the caas, the giant wave of surprise washing over your friends, you interlace your fingers within his and kiss his cheek.

He doesn't what that makes the two of you now... but he would give you all the time in the world to figure that out if it meant you could be his again.

—

You trace your fingers against outline of his face. Splatters of moist moonlight kissing the high rise of his cheeks, dusting along the long fringe of lashes which cast shadows along his skin, his freckles are like dots of bronze dispersed on his skin. He's beautiful like this.

"You're thinking too much," he says with his eyes closed, smiling a little. "Don't think so much."

You laugh. "Or what, huh?"

Felix cracks an eye open, his grin big, kiddish. "I was hoping you'd say that," he rubs the tip of his nose against your collarbone, he snuggles closer to your chest. What you hadn't expected was how he shifted his entire weight onto you, lying entirely atop you as though he were a starfish.

You couldn't stop laughing at the motion, it's so cheesy and gross...you love it.

—

Here's something you don't know — Jisung tells his friends everything, about making out with you and taking you out...everything. News travels fast. Faster than you anticipated. Despite wanting to divulge the matter, you were too taken by the recent shifts in your feelings to confess to your little interaction. You had told yourself again and again — a little later, just a little later and I’ll tell him.

It could be too late now.

The entire campus knew of your little rendezvous, shooting you curious looks... it's not until Minho comes up to verify the floating rumours do you all but sprint to Felix's place. You think of Chan's trusting eyes, of don't hurt him, of laughing in the intimacy of your bedroom and swiping your fingers down his spine like you were trying to commit the undulating design to memory.

You're not sure where it all began.

but you don't want it to end.

Felix doesn't answer your calls or your messages. When he buzzes you up, just from his gait, just from the resigned look in his eyes, you know he knows.

You watch as he listlessly leaves you to enter, walking before you without saying as much as a word.

You grab Felix’s elbow, making him stop in his tracks. He looks at your fingers wrapping around the muscle, shrugging you off easily. It’s just a small gesture but its impact is so large...that you feel your heart break into a million pieces.

You had never seen Felix being so quiet, even when he was down, he found a manner to radiate a form of optimistic energy which baffled you. You can’t believe how much you could have possibly hurt him.

“I can explain.” you gulp, “We went out on one date. It wasn’t because I liked him, I know it’s stupid and...I should’ve told you. I’m sorry, that's not an excuse, but you have to trust me when I say it didn’t...it doesn’t mean anything to me—”

“Did you sleep with him?”

With his back turned away, he still isn’t looking at you, speaking to you with a surprisingly stable tone.

“No.”

Felix takes a shuddering breath, one which expresses the small relief of knowing that Jisung hadn’t seen, touched you, felt you in the way that he only had, but there’s still so much more he wants to know.

“Did he make you laugh?”

It’s a silly question, he realises belatedly but he can’t help it. Some part of him, a large part, thinks he’d be more hurt if you made someone happy and they made you happy than if you fucked them.

You shake your head even though he can’t see you. “He didn’t.”

Your fingers again reach for his, wrapping your index into his thumb. You slowly move your hands to his middle, clutching him close to your chest, chin hooking into his shoulder, suddenly...you feel him melt into the embrace. Felix’s voice falters for the first time, small trembles against you. You’re willing to answer all his queries if it could put his mind at ease. You put your heart on hold for too long.

"Do you hate me...?" He sniffles.

You blink....did you?

Felix had changed, like you, he had matured, the past version of him you had so stubbornly ingrained in your endless inner monologue is not the one you grew all too familiar with...

Familiarity does breed contempt, does it not? Well you think the line between love and contempt is untraceable, melded together as a mysterious whole. After all those years, you were still angry, still filled to the brim with contempt for him and more importantly, yourself because you still love him much more than you'd like to admit. After all you've been through. After all this time. The need to love him ultimately encompassed every other emotion which posed itself as a hindrance.

So the opposite of love, the absence of love, you think, isn't hate, it's indifference. An emotion you never felt towards him.

Felix has wedged himself into every aspect of your life, tainted every portion of your routine in his presence and in his absence.

You don't think you'd have it another way.

"You broke my heart," you explain, "I was angry....but I could never hate you for the sake of hating you."

"I can't..." Felix whispers, twisting his body so he could look at you now, “I can’t promise you that it won’t be hard but I'm not—I’m not going anywhere...you know that right?”

You lean your forehead against his, his eyes shifting to your mouth, hands rising to wrap around your neck. You smile.

“I know.” you say, "Me neither."

“I love you...” He says in a small voice, putting his hand against your knuckles. “Do you love me?”

Your eyes soften, cupping his face like this — carefully collecting a lone tear with your thumb before it could touch his cheek. This time there is not a shred of hesitancy, no pause, no pondering before you say,

“I never stopped.”

—

You enter in a blind rush of panic, thinking you might miss your ride, feet knocking together, elbows hitting elbows, bustling all around you and the sudden overwhelming stench of people hit you, it’s not an ideal setting, not at all actually.

But you couldn’t bother to be displeased a second you spent with him. A teenager rolls her eyes at how disgustingly in love you are, elderly couples tutting under their breath...albeit, you don’t fail to notice their subtle smiles, small shake of their heads which attested to the fact that the joy you both radiate is.. absolutely infectious. You stumble with him behind, Felix is laughing breathlessly, bumping into your chest as the train suddenly starts moving, you place a finger on his cheek and he raises his chin to look at you.

“Did you eat?” he repeats, mocking himself, a dialogue from a time which seems an element of the distant past replaced by a love which compensated for every hitch in your relationship. You still argue, still disagree and still make up the same. Felix was right, it isn’t easy.

But when two people love each other as much as you do,

it’s worth trying. With every fibre of your being.

“No.” You laugh, playing along, “But I could, with you.”

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yourlocalshinguji · 2 years

Note

Hey, I’m not the original requester for those clingy Junko and Mukuro hc’s but I love how you wrote them!

I was wondering if you could do nondespair Junko and Mukuro with a gender neutral S/O about cooking dinner?

(Non despair) Junko and Mukuro cooking with their S/O

I have no idea of what was in my mind when I wrote this??? Please don't mind me- Anyway, thank you so much for requesting for Mukuro<3!

The reader is g/n.

—Mod Korekiyo.

—Junko is... hard to convince.

—She loves you, a lot. But the Ultimate Fashionista? Cooking with her own two hands? As if.

—She usually prefers to take you to a restaurant and pay everything instead of cooking by herself. Anything but getting inside a kitchen.

—This being said, you'd probably have to be the one dragging her to the kitchen in order to get her to do something together.

—"All right, all right, I'll do it! But only if I get to give you a kiss first."

—If Junko actually feels like trying to cook seriously (because you're with her), she's surprisingly good keeping in mind that her experience goes from little to zero.

—Which doesn't necessarily mean good, but still.

—She'd always try to make something worth calling impressive, amazing, delicious, fantastic... If she's gonna do something, at least she will impress her darling.

—By looks, I mean. The taste is something else.

—Cooperation and coordination while cooking together is also kind of hard, since she's... the way she is. She likes to be the one giving orders while at the same time she's having a mental debate on whether she should add salt or sugar.

—"Babe, pass me that. By the way, salty or sweet?"

—"What?"

—"The food, honey. Salty or sweet?"

—"We're cooking pasta though?... You can't... directly add sugar to that?"

—"How cute. Hold that thought."

—This is when she's in a good mood. But when she's bored?

—Chaos.

—In that case Junko's priority ain't even cooking something edible.

—Sometimes you can't tell if she does it on purpose or not, but it looks like her specialty is setting the kitchen on fire and not feeling any regrets about it.

—"Junko, what were you exactly thinking about?"

—"Isn't it obvious? Boiling the water."

—So basically, cooking with Junko or letting her cook by her own is like a gamble: you never know what may come out of it. Sometimes it's tasty, sometimes it's fucked up and sometimes you're just speechless.

—"Well? What do you think, honey?"

—"Tell me you didn't seriously add a cup of pepper to this."

—"Cooking? Well... I guess I know how to build a fire to heat up rations."

—Joking. This comes straight up from School Mode. Anyway.

—Mukuro's kind of surprised. Fast food had always been her way to go since for her, spending too much time preparing a meal isn't efficient at all.

—Military days.

—But of course, you asked her, and there's no way she's refusing to do something together with you.

—You can see that she's clearly trying her best, and you're not sure if it's for the food or to impress you.

—She doesn't talk much, mostly because she's so focused on what she should do next that she forgets you're actually there to help as well.

—So if you see her standing there with a stoic expression doing nothing in particular... she's just thinking.

—"Muku, are you okay?"

—"...Hm? Oh, y-yeah, sorry. I'm not... quite sure about what I should do next."

—(Pssst, if you do know how to cook... don't miss the chance and teach her something even if it's just to spend more time together.)

—You both still manage to have a good coordination even if you've never cooked together before. When she speaks, whether it is to ask for something or to make a small comment, Mukuro's voice is always soft and gentle.

—Random quick hugs and kisses out of nowhere? Yes.

—Don't let her cook alone. Your presence is the only reason why she manages to make something edible in the first place, but without you... she has no interest in cooking at all.

—She'd still try keeping in mind you're probably going to eat it, but that's all.

—Mukuro is that kind of person who secretly looks up a random recipe of whatever you've chosen to cook before starting. She wants to be prepared at least, okay?

—If what you two cooked is actually delicious, she'll give you all the credit for it, even though you both did as much as the other.

—"This tastes... amazing. I wasn't expecting less from you, puppy."

—That means a kiss as a reward.

#danganronpa #danganronpa trigger happy havoc #danganronpa x reader #junko enoshima #junko x reader #mukuro ikusaba #mukuro x reader #x reader #gn reader #headcanons #mod korekiyo

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droogiesanddiscourse · 3 years

Text

HCs: Dating Herbert West

A/N: I regret nothing <3 he’s so handsome and sarcastic, he’s just too dreamy to me. Also I've been projecting my sexuality and gender onto him too r.i.p I love comfort characters! Warnings: mention of blood, obviously if you watched Re-Animator (1985) you know what you're getting into. Reader is gender neutral.

✧ You'll meet because of a mutual interest in his work, offering your services to help him and the pursuit of his ultimate dream of re-animating the dead.

✧ He's never found someone as passionated as him before, and Herbert can't help but to feel a deep pang of interest about you in his rather shut away heart. Maybe it could be "love," a concept so foreign to him it might as well be a dream. He'll believe it when it happens.

✧ Herbert refers to you as his "partner." The vague terminology is deliberate -- are you his lab partner? Work partner? Roommate? Significant other? Colleague? Who honestly knows besides you and Herbert. He's not about to go telling the entire world he has a significant other; his stoic, sardonic, calculated reputation depended on it. Can't have anyone thinking he's going soft.

✧ Just because your his partner doesn’t mean he won’t act all sassy and sarcastic towards you. Herbert has basically just one, monotone voice setting. But he secretly loves it when you throw it right back at him, he enjoys that little bit of challenge from you. But he always gets the last word in. You both have a good sense of humor about you. While others he is close to, like Dan, are easy to manipulate and bend to his will, he likes when you have your own personality and are not afraid to put your foot down when things get out of hand.

✧ "[Y/N], give me a hand," he'll extend his arm over, his palm turned upward. Cue you giving him an actual severed hand. He'll let out a deep sigh, wiping the sweat away from his brow with the back of his other hand. He'll just look at you, brooding and silent, not even the semblance of a smile on his face. "I know you think this is very funny, but I can assure you it's not."

✧ It's pretty funny. And you know he thinks it's really funny too, he just refuses to show it.

✧ Herbert isn't so much of a showy person at all. He has his own way of showing affection that isn't entirely romantic in a sense, but is important in understanding how he expresses himself.

✧ You both might be up super late attempting to discover a breakthrough, and suddenly you're face down, asleep on his lab table after practically taping your eyes open and injecting pure caffeine into your body. He'll finally notice when he asks you to hand him a scalpel, oftentimes so consumed in his current job that he doesn't even lift his head up to assess his surroundings. But when he does, and turns to see you, he exhales quickly through his nose in a semblance of a chuckle. He'll grab a blanket from the cupboard, and wrap you in it as you get a few restful hours of sleep.

✧ You won't expect a lot of hands on, loveydovey types of affection unless you bother him enough for it. Then he'll begrudgingly indulge you. He will, however, give you cheek and forehead kisses frequently, especially for a job well done after an exhausting night in the lab.

✧ Date nights are usually at your accord, after pestering him nonstop about taking you out for a nice dinner, or going to the movies / theatre. Something to drag his ass out of those four walls of his basement sanctuary. He would rather stay in the house than go out, both so he can continue his work, but also because he's rather socially anxious anyways. He has you, what else would possibly interest him in the outside world?

✧ Herbert’s work is, unorthodox to say the absolute least about it. And oftentimes those who know about his off-work escapades refuse to believe it’s legitimacy, or think he’s just plain crazy. He’ll often feel dejected, emerging from beneath his basement laboratory covered in blood, his short black hair in disarray from running his fingers through it in frustration. These are the moments where he reveals himself to be the most vulnerable around you.

✧ He sometimes needs to just crawl up in your arms, and lets your nails soothingly scratch his scalp as you tell him how smart he is, and how everyone who discredits him will be proven wrong. Herbert’s got a bit of a praise kink, he just loves being told how important he is.

✧ Regardless of what others might think, and even your own trepidations in your relationship, Herbert truly does love you. It frustrates him how he can't show it, and worries you might think he's purposefully cold towards you. But that's just how he is. And you come to understand it, and learn to tell when he's (attempting) to open himself up a bit more. His ways of affection is more than enough for you.

✧ A relationship with Herbert is complicated, messy (literally and metaphorically), and confusing, but every day is a new adventure with him. You'll never know what you'll wake up to.

#herbert west x reader #herbert west imagine #slasher imagine #slasher x reader #hebert west x you #re-animator x reader #jeffery combs x reader #gn!reader #slasher imagines #horror imagines #horror movie imagines #80s horror #bride of reanimator #Herbert west #re-animator

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sweetestlamb · 3 years

Text

Frozen Inside

Summary: You need to remember your place.

Author's note: Chapter 9 is here! Taking a break from these two was pretty hard for me I just love them so much and love writing them in this world I created. As mentioned before this chapter includes a character that someone suggested I use to stir the Junjin pot little, if anyone can guess who this extraordinary character is I will give you a cyber cookie LOL. Just a minor heads up to the person who suggested it, I don’t sympathize with this character as much as others did but I will try to give him some depth and not completely vilify him. But thank you for the suggestion! Hope you all enjoy, writing the ending kinda broke my heart a little so any positive words would be very welcome right now.

The bus ride is far too quick, he’s already loathing the moment when his shoulder will no longer be brushing "accidentally" against hers and he has to suppress a groan when someone rings the bell and he realizes this is their stop. She'd been acting uncharacteristically adorable after his honest statement earlier, running away as soon as the bus arrived as if she'd never gazed upon herself in a reflective surface before. She was beautiful, it wasn't something that was subjective it was just a fact. But once they entered the bus she made her way to a single seater by the window obviously trying to get away from him, he'd easily tugged her away by her backpack forcing her to a double seater in the back instead.

They were sitting together, there were already straying eyes watching her every move. Some from their schools and others just strangers who didn't bother to hide their interest in her, eying her up salaciously and and piquing his desire to throw hands. They were all lucky he had an important date after school, he couldn’t afford to get trouble right now.

She'd glared at him and swung her arms latching on to a metal handle trying to stop him but he was stronger than her, with a huff he pulled her with him and made her sit in the inner seat so he could bracket her in and marginally hide her form from the predatory looks.

Her leg brushed against his before moving away, so quickly he almost thought he imagined the whole thing. But then it happened again. He glanced over discretely at the tail of his eye.

He'd never seen Sujin fidget before. Didn't know her bones were capable of such a function but he had felt her jiggling knee knock into his own and learned that even an ice princess like her got embarrassed. He swallowed the immense pride that erupted at the realization that he was the one making her act this way. Completely out of her character.

"It's our stop." She whispers staring at the floor, eyes refusing to look up.

He's tempted to ignore her and see if that will make her look at him, now that he's been the center of her attention- that hug is burned into his mind- he is greedy for more, her resistance makes him even more desperate.

But he wordlessly stands up instead sliding out of the seat and opening the back door for them, she only pauses minutely before skipping down the stairs and exiting the bus. Her short pleated skirt bounces precariously with every movement and he's temporarily distracted gazing at the smooth expanse of milky skin, why were the school skirts so short anyway? Sujin's barely reached her knee, stopping in the meat of her thigh. Maybe he should start a school petition to get longer skirts for the girls. The boys probably wouldn’t be in agreement though. Perverts.

His stomach clenches at the thought of others staring too, maybe he could at least convince her to tie the sweater around her waist instead of wearing it normally. It was worth a try at least.

"We probably shouldn't walk in together, your fangirls will go cra--"

He interrupts her, not paying at all to what she's suggesting because he has no intentions of separating from her. She's so exhausting with all this push and pull honestly. He already told her that they don't matter.

"Isn't your skirt too short?"

He keeps walking without looking over at her, realizing too late how bold his question is.

He stops when he realizes that she's no longer beside him, twisting left and right before turning around and seeing her a few paces behind. He almost sighs in relief much more familiar with this particular emotion etched on her face, annoyance and mild rage- the patented princess look™️ and he backs up looking at her with a lifted brow, silently questioning her inactivity.

"What did you say to me Han Seojun?" She admonishes staring at him like he's grown another head and she’s ready to decapitate them both, she also steps into his space tilting her angry face to glare directly into his face. She looks prepared to murder him and hide the body.

He's not stupid enough to repeat his gutsy idiotic question, he very much likes his face the way it's currently arranged. He might be stupid but he's not that stupid.

"Me? Nothing. I would never say anything, I don't deserve to speak in your presence." He flutters his eyelashes dramatically, speaking in an exaggerated cute voice and she stares blankly at first. Both of them searching the others face before the tension is snapped like a rubber band and she pushes him in the chest, he almost whines reaching out to grab her wrist before he sees the small smile on her face, its hidden instantly behind the curtain of her hair when she moves away but he sees it and he feels his chest palpitate.

He stands staring in wonder. Lost in her spell.

He's never been a gracious loser but she gives him no chance in the matter.

He stares at her back, cheeks hurting as beams at her bounding off in his sweater. It's hers now he will never be able to wear it again without remembering her in it, it's been ruined in the best possible way.

💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

Chorong struggles to carry all the cards he pushes at him, the female population seems to have decided that he was sick and his return results in high pitched screams of his name and a constant stream of food and gifts being shoved in his direction, despite his refusal. He's wandering the halls arm filled with the gifts when he runs into Sujin, her face brightens upon seeing him before she glances down at his arms. The pretty smile is thwarted before it can even comes to full fruition, her eyes turning cold before she stomps past him.

He smirks at her back, chuckling as Chorong stares in confusion before asking, "What's wrong with her?" He shakes his head before handing the bigger boy all the unwanted gifts, her smile was worth more than all of this anyway.

Lunch can't come soon enough and he happily swaggers into the bustling room, oblivious to the amount of hungry eyes that latch onto his form. His own eyes too busy locking on one figure and one figure alone.

The seat across from her is conveniently empty and he laughs into his sleeve when Jukyeong waves him over, smiling with conspiration at him pointing at the empty seat without an ounce of subtlety, giving him a thumbs up. He can't control his laughter when Sujin turns to the girl and to hide her damning thumb the clumsy girl pokes herself in the eye. He definitely owed her now that looked mighty painful.

Suho nods at him as he takes his seat, he returns the gesture. Watching as the usually stoic boy reaches across to comfort his girlfriend, stroking her hair and blowing gently into her teary red eye as she whines loudly.

He opens his backpack taking out the food the girl avoiding him like the plague had given him just this morning. The dumplings are perfect this time she's clearly figured out a technique now, and when he bites into them a delicious umami flavor explodes on his tongue. He groans in pleasure before stuffing another dumpling in his mouth eagerly.

"Wow those look amazing! Did your mom make them?" Su-ah calls across the table and he freezes mid-chew instinctively looking at the real culprit and her eyes are already on him, wide and then pleading. He knows what she's begging from him but he really really wants to disobey and tell everyone that she made them for him. That the same Kang Sujin, who served men roundhouse kicks and resting bitch faces for lunch had made him food and was sitting there eating a lunch he had prepared for her.

It sounds so domestic and he has to bite his tongue to stop himself from doing something she'll regret.

But she's not ready it's too evident and he's not inconsiderate nor selfish. Whatever this is, it's far too new and fragile for him to throw it to the wolves before it's on stable grounding.

"No my mom didn't make it." He answers honestly and he can feel the cold air wafting off Sujin in frigid waves and then he feels a sharp kick to his ankle, he has to grab her feet with his legs to stop her from delivering another blow. He probably shouldn't find her violent tendencies so attractive. He clearly isn't right in the head.

"Someone else made it. Someone special." He continues trying not to wince as she tries to attack him again. Immediately the table erupts into ohs and everyone starts talking at once except her best friends who look on with smirks, Su-ah playfully winking at him.

"Someone special? Who? Who made it? Do you have a girlfriend?"

Sujin spontaneously starts choking on her blueberry milk, the very one he'd packed in her lunch bag this morning the pale blue liquid spilling out the corners of her lips. He passes her a napkin immediately, their fingers brushing as she takes the paper from his grip wiping her face and looking sheepish once she realizes that all eyes are on her now.

"Are you okay?" He asks amused, looking at her with a smile barely hidden. So fucking cute.

"Yeah don't worry about me." She breezily replies struggling to escape from his tight grip under the table, unbeknownst to everyone there. But her cold statement only reminds me of their meeting in the hospital. Her words echoing in his heart, I'm going to worry about you. Who are you to tell me not to? Let me do what I want. Hearing those words made him want to stupidly put himself in more scenarios that would result in her concern, maybe he'd get another hug. Or a even a ki--

"Don't think we forgot! Who made you this food Seojun-ah?" Chorong breaks his concentration and he stares incredulously at the other boy, his words were meant to trick everyone else but his best friend should know who he was referring to; he'd been the one to deliver the food for him after all. Wasn't it clear who he liked? Who might be making him food in return?

He sighs shaking his head, glancing up at Sujin from under his fringe feeling warm all over.

It's hard to tail him without making it too obvious but she tells Jukyeong and Su-ah that she has something to do before running after Seojun at a distance. She misses the knowing look on both of their faces as they watch her conspicuously hide behind a very thin tree. He had offered to wait for her but she didn't need his fanclub seeing them leaving together, they were so possessive of the boy. It didn't matter that he never showed any interest in them they were all still convinced that he belonged to them.

She didn't see him making food for any of them so she didn't know how they reached this asinine conclusion but she'd rather stay off their radar.

"Are you practicing to be a national spy? Why didn't you come when I offered to wait for you?" They are far from the school now, miles but she still looks around nervously before speeding up finally allowing them to walk side by side. He looks over at her fondly, she looks away unable to maintain eye contact when he's acting like this. It doesn't help that she can feel her walls weakening, she was tempted to accept his offer earlier. To walk with him side by side and let everyone see, she was losing her mind.

"I didn't want to be murdered by your girls." She teases, the words fall flat because as soon as she utters them she feels sick to her stomach.

A huge hand suddenly wraps around her wrist halting her, warm even through the stick material of the gifted sweater.

She turns to look at him bewildered, even more so at the hard look on his face. Those exotically sloping eyes even thinner than usual as he pulls her closer. She gulps, hard. Looking at him as his eyes peruse her face slowly, full of dark intention her blood simmers hot under the matching gaze.

"They aren't my girls. You know that." The emphasis and bite on the word makes her uneasy, refusing to think about the implications of his words. A sheen of sweat raises on her back, and she gently tugs her arm away scoffing to tear through the thick cloud of tension that is loitering between them.

"I was just joking. You don't have to be so serious. Let's go." She awkwardly rubs at her wrist before bolting away, scared to continue this line of conversation. Something has changed between them and she has no idea how and if they can go back to the way things were.

A little voice in her head whispers, Is that really what want you?

How is she supposed to know what she wants? Up until this point that has never mattered to anyone, she was just expected to do as she was told. Speak when spoken to. Everything about this is foreign and terrifying. Knowing that he'll be there to catch her if she falls is more nerve wrecking than anything she's faced thus far.

It's better not to think about it especially with where they're going, but thinking about that makes her even more nervous. She fidgets with the sleeve of the huge sweater, tugging at the extra material that folds over her hands. She suddenly realizes that she's completely covered in Seojun, this wasn't her best idea but she can't bring herself to remove the sweater.

She's never felt so warm.

"You can wait inside, I need to get something." He suddenly pats her head ruffling her hair and she reaches up to push his hand away only to be entranced by the grin on his face, has his smile always been that illuminant or is this reserved just for her?

She nods frozen watching him walk further and further away, until he turns a corner and disappears. She takes a deep breath centering herself before, able to breathe easier now without him sucking up all the air with his magnetic energy.

It's weird being back at the hospital especially alone, she hesitates at the entrance before finally entering. She expects trouble at the front desk seeing as how she's not family but the nurses smile at her knowingly.

"You're back. Room 105. Straight down the hall."

She shifts uncomfortably but nods her head in gratitude before walking down the hall. There are a row of free seats and she eases down into one, Seojun still isn't back and she can't very well just go into the room. She's basically a stranger, right?

Luckily she brought along homework, she can put this time to good use and complete some while Seojun gets whatever he needs that so important that he abandoned her all alone.

Minutes trickle by and she gets lost in her history homework highlighting dates and names of Kings, stopping at King Cheoljong when she hears the patter of footsteps and instinctively she glances up meeting huge round bespectacled eyes.

"Unnie! What are doing here?" Gowoon rushes over grabbing her hands, she flinches at the sudden touch on her rough hands and she coughs discretely pulling away, tucking the mutilated appendages away. She smiles disarmingly to ease any offenses that movement might have caused. The younger girl smiles back easily, not commenting at all on the action. She mentally thanks her.

"I heard your mother was hospitalized, I thought it would be okay if I visited her?" She suddenly feels extremely insecure about her presence here. Why had she assumed that she was welcome here after only meeting them once? She was getting too confident and it was a dangerous way to live, it often led to heartache.

Like now, she could pretend that it didn't matter if Seojun's mother didn't want to see her but if she was rejected it would hurt, she was the first maternal figure that had ever shown her any type of authentic kindness. Jukyeong's mom was ardent about regaling how pretty she thought she was but she'd heard that growing up, from her father as he bragged about how many suitors she would have and how resourceful that would be. So the words didn't do much but remind her of that, her supposed beauty had been weaponized long ago. She hated the constant reminder, as if her looks were all she had to offer to the world.

You didn't feel that way when he said it though. You liked it.

She shakes her head clearing away such traitorous thoughts.

"Unnie, of course you're welcome. Mom will be so happy to see you. I just meant why are you out here, come on let's go greet her!"

She barely has a chance to stuff her book back into her bag before the eager girl is yanking her away. She tries to fight the hold but it's useless and with a swipe of her hand Gowoon slides open the door, tugging her into the airy hospital room.

Her heart thunders in her chest.

She wants to disappear.

"Mom we're here!" Gowoon announces happily vibrating with youthful energy. Her eyes are glued to the checkered floor as she bows silently in greeting.

"H-hello again. I don't know if you remember me but I'm--"

"Sujin sweetie! Why are you acting so formal? Come, come. How have you been? Are you eating all your meals?" The older woman bulldozes past her stilted greeting, pointing to an empty chair next to her bed. She swallows before walking over and sitting down. Gowoon ambles over too hopping onto the edge of her mother's bed, immediately launching into a retelling of her day. She listens heart heavy at being so easily invited into such an intimate moment.

"What about you Sujin? How was your day?" She jumps at the inquiry, looking up to see both women watching her avidly waiting for her reply. This feels foreign, nobody has ever asked her about her day before.

"Um...it was okay. I got a 100 on my math test. I'm eating all my meals. I...um I had a good lunch." She stutters out foolishly adding the last line, thankful that Seojun isn't here to hear the praise who knows how he would have behaved? Surely his mother and sister don’t know that he has been making her food so the comment will be harmless.

An easy smile slides across the mother's face, "Is that so? I'm glad you enjoyed your lunch dear. Great job on your test! If only these kids would come home with news like that." She pokes Gowoon in her belly, to which the other girl folds her arm and humphs sticking out her tongue.

"We can't all be Kang Sujin, beautiful and intelligent like I would get that lucky?" She blushes embarrassed at the compliment waving her arm to brush the words away.

"Hey! What are you saying? You're my sister. I have enough of both of those for both of us." A deep voice sounds from the door and she turns to look at the boy, the fragrant scent of flowers filling the room. He crosses the room in long steps depositing them in an empty vase on the windowsill. They are in a perfect position to receive all the sun's magnificent rays.

So that's where he had been.

Gowoon scoffs at him, grumbling about narcissism and big headed boys but she grows silent as Seojun walks over to her.

He hands a smaller bundle to Gowoon, unlike the white lilies in the vase this bouquet is vibrant with hues of vivid blues, purples and fuchsia , it matches the girls personality perfectly and the smile that laces across her pretty face is enough to singlehandedly sustain the flowers.

"You got me flowers too?" Gowoon asks voice full of suspicion as she accepts the flowers, dipping her nose to sniff at them. She hums excitedly clutching them closer to her chest beaming at her brother.

"I was already there. I figured why not?" He tries to downplay the kind act but she catches the slight pink on his high cheekbones.

It's such a wholesome scene. She feels as if she's intruding by simply being there, especially when she sees the serene smile on their mother’s face watching her children, her pride is palpable.

"Thanks oppa."

He shrugs rubbing his neck, "You're welcome brat."

"What about that bouquet who's that for?" Gowoon innocently asks pointing to another bouquet that was partially hidden in his bomber jacket, bringing her attention to the last bundle in his hands inside a brown bag with a small blue bow tied at the base of the stems.

The pink changes to red.

He awkwardly shuffles under all their watchful eyes, staring out the window with intense focus as if it as the secrets to life.

"Oh my god, I know!" Gowoon exclaims snickering now as she bounces gleefully on the bed. She squirms in her seat trying to think of a believable excuse to leave the room, it couldn't really be for her right? He wasn't crazy enough to give her flowers in front of his family. Right?

"You have a crush on one of the nurses don't you? Seriously oppa, they're all too old for you. You're going to make them uncomfortable, they're just doing their job." Gowoon scolds him wagging her finger and pushing her glasses up the small bridge of her button nose.

Oh.

That made sense. They were for one of the nurses, probably the pretty that had allowed them to stay so late the other night. She had once again gotten ahead of herself, stupid. She should be relieved anyway this was better, if he had another crush then this thing between them would fade away and she'd stop feeling like she was walking on eggshells around him.

"What are you babbling about now? This isn't one of her dramas. I told you I was already there they aren't a big deal. Here, take it." He glares at his sister and shocks Sujin when he turns and thrusts the delicate bouquet at her, roughly placing them in her lap when she doesn’t accept them right away before taking the second empty seat next to his mother's bed. He pointedly avoids eye contact with all of them and she stares down at the flowers in her lap with her mouth open.

They are lovely, deep blues at the base that lightens as your eyes traverse the length of the flowers, baby blue fades to a piercing white making the bouquet look like a work of art itself.

"Oh they're for unnie. Okay. Good I thought you were trying to flirt." Gowoon dismisses the flowers now, turning back to her mother and continuing her story about her day ignoring them both now. She can feel Seojun's eyes hot on her face but she's unable to look away from the flowers in her lap.

Idiot.

She watches the family easily conversing never a lull in their animated conversation and she finally excuses herself, lying about going to find a bathroom. Nobody questions why she's bringing the flowers with her gratefully, she has no plausible reason for why she can't put the flowers down. Seojun stares at her unblinking but he lets her escape without question.

She leans against the solid wall outside the room as soon as the door slides shut, closing her eyes.

In, out. In, out. She coaches herself gulping in air pushing away the light-headed sensation at the base of her skull.

"You still have these pathetic attacks?" Her blood runs cold as the voice she hasn't heard in weeks siphons all the air she had just gifted her empty lungs.

No. No, it can't be.

But once she forces her eyes open she sees that her nightmare is indeed a reality.

Her father stares at her with contempt, his lips thin as they are pulled into a familiar sneer. He's wearing his white lab coat with a stethoscope around his neck and a clipboard in his hands.

Panic rises instantly as she looks at him, breathing is now impossible.

"You're lucky this is where we met. I got your present. It was perfect for the fireplace. I humored your little tantrum but it's over now. I expect you back home, tomorrow. You have another date with the boy you stood up last time. Thankfully your face was worth something. " His tone is conversational but she can see the rage swirling under the façade, his fists are white knuckled on the clipboard. He's barely holding himself back.

She clutches the flowers tighter desperate for support. She feels like she's free falling from a tremendous height.

"What are you doing here? What business do you have here?" He stares at her and she has to get him away, he can't see Seojun they can't meet here, especially outside his mother’s room. The other boy might do something reckless and her father looks dangerous right now, this could end badly. She has to protect him.

"I came to see you. To tell you to sign the papers." She replies with courage she's not currently feeling, it wavers as her father's eye become colder and penetrating.

"I'm not signing anything, you are my property. You better come to your senses before you make me really angry." He threatens her calmly in the hallway, as nurses and doctors walk by bowing to him in respect.

"I'll leave first." She whispers attempting to sidestep around him but he grips her wrist as she passes him, stopping her escape.

He eyes the flowers in her arms and she protectively clutches them in her arms shifting them away from him.

"Don't continue to piss me off. I will make you regret it."

She's ashamed at how frightened his words make her feel, she'd thought that she was strong enough to face him but she was wrong. Stupidly so. She feels small under his gaze her wrist crushing under his powerful grip but she's too scared to even pull away, powerless to stop his abuse.

"People are watching." The method her mother has always used, he might not care about her but he cares about his appearance. His hold loosens at her words until she's free and without pause she scurries away, her feet bringing her to safety until she's outside. She's panting so hard that her body is shaking, kneeling over with the bouquet between her knees.

She sees drops landing on the floor and wonders when it started raining, only to look up and see clear blue skies not a cloud in sight.

His wife whimpered on the ground clutching her face, bright red mark on her swollen cheek. He shook his smarting hand as he tightly gripped the papers in his hand that she had handed him. She had been stupid enough to actually bring this to him, he is tempted to slap her again.

Emancipation papers.

It would have been hilarious if it hadn't enraged him so much, who did she think to defy him? To try to leave when he wasn't done using her? The very idea was preposterous and he would beat it out of her as soon as he dragged her back home. This had gone on long enough, her little rebellion. He had humored it expecting her to come crawling back once he turned off her credit cards, but that hadn't been enough.

He hadn't expected her to have any friends to turn to.

He thrusted the disgusting papers into the blazing fire that he'd lit, smiling darkly as they burnt and turned to ashes. This was how he planned on dealing with her newfound defiance, he would burn it out of her.

The disobedient fool didn't know how good she truly had it, she was lucky all he did was smack her around a little. At least she had a father that cared enough to beat her.

He'd grown up all alone, rich beyond belief but left to fend for himself in hotel after hotel. His parents were only that by title, he'd been raised by a rotating stream of nannies and butlers. Nothing he did was enough to get their attention, even starting fights or cursing at teachers. All his actions were dismissed easily with a envelope of money, teachers and students all sucking up to him and enabling his behavior.

He'd learned at a young age that anybody could be bought and wrong and right was something that only the poor had to adhere by, he was above the law, transcending morality. He could do anything and nobody would stop him. Nobody would dare.

Except his own daughter, perhaps it was karma. A punishment for all his bad deeds, he laughs humorously at the idea. He's getting old now to have thoughts like that. Regardless of what she wants he has no plans of letting her go, she's his to do with as he wishes. That had been the only reason he'd married her pathetic mother and the only reason he hadn't forced her to get an abortion once he learned the sex of the baby. She'd been a beauty despite her pitiful background and he'd hoped that a child of theirs would at least be something worth looking at.

In the end she was, his business partners following her form as she bloomed into a woman. He hadn't cared about their wandering eyes planning on selling her to the highest and most advantageous bidder, and he had found a buyer. Someone that needed him too, combined they could build a formidable partnership. He had a son Sujin's age and he had easily offered his daughter to sweeten the deal.

It was time to bring home his wayward child by any means possible. These childish games were over.

"It's good to see you son. Have you been healthy? Eating well?" Suho sits down bowing his head in greeting to his father, it feels surreal to be sitting here with him but they've come a long way. Therapy has also done wonders to rebuilding their broken relationship, they attend twice a week. Now he can look at his father without pain and guilt scratching at his skin.

"I'm well. Thank you for agreeing to see me. I have to discuss something important with you." He cuts to the chase, unsure of the outcome of this conversation but Sujin hasn't been talking to him and he knows that they need his father's help. They can't take her father down alone, they're just kids.

"It sounds serious. Are you okay?" His father asks voice thick with genuine concern, his brows furrowed.

"It's not about me. It's someone else. I can't tell you much because it's not my story but I need to ask you this, if you had to choose between supporting me or a business partner who would you choose?" His father looks taken back by the question, searching his face with confused eyes.

"Son, what are you talking about? What business partner? Why are you asking this all of a sudden?"

He leans in staring directly into his father's eyes, he can now admit their resemblance as he stares at the face that looks so much like his.

"Dad, please just answer my question. If I needed your support, would you give it to me no matter what?" He questions, watching as his father stares at him in confusion and he waits patiently.

"Suho. I would choose you over anyone, I still need to prove myself if you're still asking me questions like that." He feels a tinge of guilt as his father shuffles away looking at him with a sad smile, he can't deny that. They've come far but there's still a part of him that remembers his father after his mother's passing, remembers blaming his father for years for his friends death. He's working on overcoming those scars but they are deep, beyond his flesh. Etched deep into his heart.

"One day I'm going to need your support. I need you to come without question. I need you to stand beside me." He stares at his father, seven years old again begging for his father's attention, his love.

Unlike his memories though, this time his father grabs his hand shooting him a melancholy smile, before nodding firmly.

"I'll be there. I'll stand beside you son."

Sujin is acting strange, more so than usual. Su-ah can't pinpoint what's wrong but the other girl is more shifty than usual and always staring off deep in thought, not even Seojun seems to know what's wrong with her. She had questioned the boy, he seemed as frustrated as her telling her that she'd started acting like this two days ago.

Nothing she does gets the other girl to talk, Sujin has resolutely slammed her walls firmly back in place. She watches her in the corner of her eye, sighing at the fake smile on the girl’s face it’s obvious to detect them now with all the real ones she's witnessed usually in a certain bad boy's presence.

Taehoon leans into her side, his arm wrapped protectively around her shoulder and she looks back at Seojun watching him watch the other girl. Jukyeong's occupying the space next to Sujin so the boy has no choice but to walk behind her, she can feel his longing. Wishes that Sujin would allow herself to be happy, full-heartedly. She notices how Sujin only allows herself to have Seojun in bursts, pushing him away when things become too much for her to handle. It's not fair to the other boy but she knows it's all her friend has to offer right now.

As they push open the school doors, she sees a swarm of students blocking the way. They are talking excitedly pointing and staring at something she can't see. She stands on her tiptoes trying to get a better view of what's happening, impatiently she pushes past the gossiping girls forcing her way to the front.

There's a guy she's never seen before, her eyes widen when she sees the motorcycle getting a sense of deja vu before glancing back at Seojun, staring impassively at the unknown boy. Everyone begins to look between the two boys, the resemblance is uncanny especially with this stranger showing up on a bike too. They look like doppelgangers, like when the evil twin shows up suddenly in a drama.

"Kang Sujin? Where is she?" The boy shouts to the crowd at large, looking around and she watches Seojun's eyes narrow icing over until they are glacial cold. Then Sujin steps forward looking unimpressed by this show, her resting bitch face in full swing despite the handsome stranger’s grin.

"Why are you looking for me?" She challenges, staring him down and all eyes are on them watching this unexpected meeting.

The boy whips a leg over the sleek bike, dismounting in one fluid motion. He's tall, even taller than Seojun and she can hear her school mates swooning at the mysterious boy, whispering about him being handsome and wishing they were Sujin. Fickle asses, they don't even know anything about him.

"I came to make sure you don't stand me up this time." He answers with a bite, there's a humorless grin on his face. A chill runs down her spine. She shifts closer to Sujin subconsciously, an innate desire to protect her flaring up.

Realization breaks on Sujin's face and she looks away, annoyance clear on her countenance.

"What do you want?" She finally asks looking exasperated with this very public conversation.

"I want the date you owe me. Let's go."

Her eyes narrow at his command not appreciating the way he's talking to her best friend, who is this rude entitled punk? Satisfaction rolls over her as Seojun steps up easily making his presence known as he scowls at the boy.

"Who the hell are you? She’s not going anywhere with you." He interrupts disdain dripping in every syllable as he steps in front of Sujin blocking her completely.

The boy raises a taunting brow at the move, before sneering cruelly right back.

"Who are you to ask me that? Get out of my face asshole." The other boy aggressively barks and she gasps as Seojun steps forward purposely raising his fist but before he can draw back and initiate the move, a dainty hand reaches out capturing his fist. Sujin briskly stops him lowering his hand and she watches as she doesn't release him immediately, standing side by side holding hands. They look like a team.

She's never seen anyone disarm Seojun like that before, Sujin's hand on him seems to evaporate all his rage and he is docile in the wake.

"Don't talk to him like that. You're starting to piss me off, I stood you up for a reason." Sujin steps forward and she wonders if her best friend knows how she looks, stepping in front of Seojun now seemingly defending him back.

The new boy sneers gazing down at their still joined hands, an ugly mean look on his face.

Then he steps forward swiftly and leans down roughly shoving Seojun away, much to the boy's vocal chagrin he stumbles back a few steps before he lunges at the other boy but it's too late he has already whispered something inaudible into Sujin's ear. Sujin steps in front of Seojun again blocking him before he can attack the strange boy, he stops immediately not wanting to hurt the smaller girl. He glares over Sujin’s shoulder, face enraged.

Sujin visibly deflates at the words and she hates the vindictive smile that stretches across the other boys face, she wishes she could punch it off. Who is this asshole?

Sujin seems lost in thought again, miles away even though she's right in front of them. When her face hardens she knows that the girl has reached a conclusion.

"Fine." Sujin finally steps forward, eyes wavering now as she glares defeated at the other boy. Her shoulders are lower now as if she's lost some of her fight, it breaks her heart. "I'll come with you." She weakly agrees voice barely above a whisper.

"Sujin! You don't have to go with him!" She yells leaving her boyfriend's arms and latching onto Sujin's elbow, sending a murderous glare to the asshole who's forcing her friend. She tugs Sujin back, refusing to let her go. She argues as Sujin peels her hands away, smiling sadly at her eyes shiny and hard.

"It's okay. I have to." She grasps at her best friends arm as she walks forward until she's right beside the boy's bike. The whole school is watching with bated breath, unsure of what exactly they're viewing but captivated nonetheless.

He tosses her an extra helmet without warning and it slams into Sujin's chest harshly and she bristles at the other boys callous action.

Sujin starts to put on the helmet before Seojun steps forward again, grabbing her wrist and she lowers the helmet staring up at him. They both stand frozen, eyes locked and she watches as Seojun silently pleads with Sujin, his face is loose and every emotion is written in the frown on his face. Sujin falters momentarily swaying into the tall boy their bodies dangerously close, her own eyes shining even brighter but then the strange boy revs his engine bursting their bubble and Sujin jumps backwards pulling away from Seojun.

Her heart jumps into her throat as she watches Sujin's mouth something to Seojun before turning away, helmet slid down her head roughly before climbing onto the bike. Seojun looks completely crushed when she wraps her arms around the other boys waist, straddling the huge bike.

"You should learn your place." The other boy scowls triumphantly, revving the engine once more.

"Shut up. Let's go." Sujin interrupts the showboating, staring straight ahead. Looking at Seojun she sees exactly why the other girl is avoiding looking at him, if heartbreak was a person it would be him.

Without another word, the mysterious boy knocks the kickstand up and squeezes the throttle and within seconds the bike roars to life, leaving them all behind Sujin's long hair bellowing behind her as they disappear down the road.

She looks over at Seojun, Suho and Jukyeong both look worried too. He stares after Sujin and the unknown boy fuming silently before he spins around, stomping away without a word.

Sujin, I hope you know what you're doing. This might be too much for him to handle.

She stares helplessly as Seojun stalks away, Chorong running after him but unable to keep up with his long gait. He doesn’t want to be caught, shutting them all out.

#true beauty #junjin #bring me to life #bmtl #a cameo #guess who it is #han seojun #kang sujin #it started cute but it can never stay that way with these two #oops #angst #true beauty kdrama

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mortedeveles · 4 years

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Can I ask for a mha headcanon with bakugou, tenya & izuku with a crush/so who's short, chubby and is very quiet & cold when they first meet, but when they start getting to know them they're actually goofy, sarcastic and very caring/cuddly (they were just super anxious when they first met the boys) I hope this isn't too confusing or too much ^^" 👉👈

thanks for requesting sweet anon! your request is perfectly fine! i hope you like it <3 on another note, if you’ve sent me a request and I haven’t responded, please send it again or DM me! i think Tumblr has been eating asks lately.. ;vv.

these are my first headcannons, I hope they’re not too bad :( what do you think? are they too informal/formal? too short/long? feel free to let me know! i made bakuhoe’s kinda long, i hope you don’t mind! MY REQUESTS ARE OPEN, THEY WILL CLOSE ON THE 16TH! as always, please leave a like, reblog, comment and/or follow if you enjoyed! <33

PAIRING: Bakugou K. x gn!reader, Tenya I. x gn!reader, Izuku M. x gn! reader

Themes: pining, humor. [HEADCANNONS]

TW: cursing? i don’t think anything else.

BAKUGOU, TENYA, IZUKU WITH A CRUSH!reader (HEADCANNONS)

When you enrolled in U.A High, you were extremely nervous. What if you weren't fit to be a Pro Hero? At the entrance exam, there were so many other students, you felt queasy at the sight of so much potential.

You went through so many insecure thoughts and fleeting moments of panic before school started. What if they didn't like you? How would you even make friends? Would they be easy going or cold and distant? When school finally started, you were in for a surprise.

BAKUGOU KATSUKI

As we all know, Katsuki was a prideful asshole at the beginning of the school year. He barely paid attention to anyone and you weren't an exception- Kirishima and the Bakusquad were the only ones who'd managed to befriend him. And even then, they would always get on his nerves.

Don't get me wrong, he knew you existed. But he didn't really pay much attention to you until the mids of the first year. The first time he interacted with you was during a fighting assignment- the two of you had been paired together, you were to engage in combat and see how your quirks worked against each other and together.

Bakugou noticed that you had a strong quirk- you weren't any extra. With your quirk Liquify, you actually managed to make him sweat and feel tired- you had a good grasp on your quirk. He didn't mind working with you, he had noticed that you tended to be quiet and distant and barely talked to him if it wasn't school-related- so he thought you were alright. Katsuki preferred a silent partner than a loud and noisy one like dunceface.

However, he was slightly thrown off guard when he spotted you with Todoroki, Tsuyu, and a few others of the class, laughing together and blabbering about nonsense. He had never seen you laugh or smile around him. Your face was shining with joy- he could see so many emotions in your expression- a startling contrast to your usual stoic or grimacing face.

Bakugou didn't care, right? The two of you were just study partners, nothing more. He didn't care about how you acted around him.

...Right?

He couldn't convince himself with his own words.

The more time the two of you worked together, the more you opened up. It was a pleasant change. Katsuki noticed how you would smile when you thought he wasn't looking or that you'd occasionally chatter with him during the fighting and reply sarcastically to his remarks.

Seeing you smile and laugh around him felt nice- his heart always skipped a beat when your lips tugged upwards.

He told himself it was nothing. He didn't like you or anything...he just liked seeing you smile. That's what he kept telling himself day after day, refusing to acknowledge his feelings for you.

''Bakugou, do you choose truth or dare?''

It wasn't until Class 1A decided to have a sleepover with all the boys and girls (minus Mineta, they kicked him out of the building for the night) and played a popular game called Truth or Dare that he finally acknowledged his feelings for you.

It was Mina's turn, and Katsuki didn't like the evil glint in her eyes. He felt his heart crawl up to his throat when Mina smiled at him.

He swallowed, clenching his fists at his side. Ever since he was paired with you, Katsuki had noticed how Mina's gaze lingered on the two of you. What was she planning? Was Mina going to force him to do something- kiss you? He felt his ears burn at the thought. After an awkward moment of silence, Bakugou spoke up.

''Truth,'' he said gruffly. Hopefully, she wouldn't ask what he was thinking.

Mina squealed in delight. She clasped her hands together. ''Bakugou,'' she spoke slowly but firmly, her face contorting into a serious expression. ''Do you like Y/N?''

''Hah?!'' he immediately snapped. His ears and cheeks burned red and small sparks snapped from his palms. Bakugou could hear snickers and squeals from the rest of his classmates but refused to look at them.

''What kind of question is that?!"

After a few moments, Bakugou grumbled a 'yes', but no one heard him, so Mina taunted him into speaking louder.

Mina giggled, shooting you a knowing glance. Bakugou wanted to look at you- what were you thinking?- but his fear of rejection willed him to keep his burning gaze on Mina.

''You heard me,'' the pink girl replied with a grin. ''Is Y/N your crush? Don't lie to me. You have to say the truth!''

''YES! GOD FUCKING DAMNIT, I LIKE Y/N, OKAY?!"

Everyone was silent at his outburst. With a growl, he glanced at you. His face felt like it was on fire- and much to his surprise, you were as flustered as him- but you offered him a timid smile. He relaxed at your smile and felt his heart flutter. You liked him back.

TENYA IIDA

As class president, Iida felt the responsibility of reaching out with all of his classmates. He wasn't particularly close with everyone, but he made sure to be friendly and supportive.

You were a different case. Despite his attempts to converse with you, Iida had noticed that you were quite distant and cold. At first, he was startled but eventually brushed it off. Maybe it was just your behavior, similar to Todoroki's.

Even though you were quite closed off, Iida refused to surrender.

He had seen you briefly interact with other classmates such as Tokoyami and Ochaco, and you were far more comfortable with them, smiling and even laughing with them. This could've discouraged him but instead, it made him feel motivated to get you to be comfortable with him.

After Iida had a sparring match with Todoroki, you approached him.

‘‘Not bad,’‘ you said. Your face was stoic- but the fact that you were complimenting him made him smile. ‘‘Your sparring skills are improving.’‘

Iida bowed down so low he nearly touched the ground. ‘’Thank you, Y/N-chan!” he exclaimed.

Eventually, the two of you became comfortable friends, but Iida was still the goody two shoes he's always been. Whenever you were acting improper or out of line, he was always there to keep you in check, scolding you with his loud and long speeches.

At first, his scoldings irked you but you eventually warmed up to them. One time, your uniform was too tight/short (it was the last pair you had clean!) and when you greeted Iida, his face reddened.

''Y/N-chan!'' he exclaimed, waving his hands in the air. ''Your uniform doesn't abide by the school uniform's guidelines! You are a very beautiful person but-,'' his face turned even redder and he swallowed nervously. ''Your presentation is improper!''

After his rant, he breathed heavily and was surprised when he heard you laughing softly. You rarely showed emotions around him- only a few small smiles and chuckles, but never a laugh.

''Oh, Iida-kun!'' you said with a teasing grin. ''It's my only clean uniform pair!'' you pouted and Iida swallowed nervously. ''I'll make sure to dress properly next time! Thanks for letting me know.'' you pressed a chaste kiss on his cheek and walked away with a mischievous grin, leaving him a blushing mess.

Iida grew fond of your jokes- they were silly, but always made him smile. Around you, Iida grew at ease. He had acknowledged that he had romantic feelings for you, but wasn’t quite sure how to tell you. It wasn’t a concerning matter for him, he was sure that one day, he would be able to confess to you... it was merely a matter of time. Meanwhile, he would simply have to push his romantic feelings aside, until he was ready to confess.

IZUKU MIDORIYA

Where do I begin?

Izuku is quite friendly and tries to befriend everyone- even if they're challenging or distant. He's proven to be successful- after all, he befriended the aloof Shoto Todoroki.

He began to interact with you through Todoroki- you had quickly befriended the bi-colored boy after joining U.A and when Izuku befriended Todoroki and began to sit together- you would tag along and sit with them.

When he met you, he was in awe for several reasons. One, you had perfect control over your quirk Liquify- which amazed him to no end- he would constantly ask you questions and mutter under his breath, writing down notes in his notebook.

Your cold behavior didn't bother him- he believed that you simply weren't comfortable with him yet, and he was okay with that fact. You could open up whenever you were ready.

His theory turned out to be correct- after months of socializing, you began to warm up with him- and he began to see a different side of you.

You would occasionally make sarcastic remarks that made him laugh loudly. Izuku didn’t miss how your eyes would slightly crinkle and how beautiful you look when you smiled- but remained silent and kept his comments to himself.

During the weekend, you had spent time with him and admitted that you felt anxious around him- he was Deku, a Pro Hero in training, he saved everyone and always smiled brightly. To a certain point, you felt intimidated by him.

After hearing your confession, Izuku assured you that you were great as well- he was a firm believer that your quirk and your traits were perfect to be a Pro Hero- there was no reason to feel intimidated.

The two of you grew even closer after that day.

Sometimes, you would become cuddly or yearn for physical contact and you would grumble or ask Izuku if you could hug him or hold his arm. He would blush brightly and stammer for several minutes but eventually agree.

If being close to him made you happy, he was happy to oblige.

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roselen-mylady · 4 years

Text

In Another Life

Bucky Barnes x reader ° part two

Summary: Waiting 88 years to find your soulmate? It was cruel. But it was a cruel fate Bucky would have to face whether he accepted it or not. Bucky was a tortured man all his life and he wasn't even granted the solace of having his soulmate at his side. All he had was the promise of one in another life.

They were separated by two different times.

But the pain in their lives were connected. Y/n had been alone ever since she could remember. All she could depend on was the soulmate that was destined to be at her side. Yet when the snap occured she lost him.

And Bucky never got to meet her.

A/n: For those who read this book before, I had to do some major redrafting so please be patient with me! Enjoy🤟

2014

“She’s a child, Fury.” The woman’s voice scolded. Y/n winced hating the fact that she was the source of conflict between the two. Fury wore his usual monotone and mildly pissed off expression as his eyes narrowed on the woman. Councilwoman Hawley’s face hardened as she turned to Y/n, “Do your parents know you're here?” She questioned, her voice loud and demanding.

Y/n's eyes drifted to Fury, uncertain and intimidated. Councilwoman was right, Y/n was just a child. But she had a mind that only Tony Stark himself could rival and that mind quickly realized that the only way she was going to stay at S.H.I.E.L.D was if she lied.

"Yes. They wanted to thank you for the opportunity S.H.I.E.L.D has given me." Y/n said cooly, trying to muster up enough confidence to fool the woman. Though she didn't seem convinced, Hawley was tired and after a few moments of staring down Y/n to see if she would relinquish her testimony, she sighed.

Councilwoman then turned to Fury, looking at him with less than pleased eyes. "I trust you'll handle the affairs then." Fury offered no acknowledgement in return and Y/n wondered if everyone in S.H.I.E.L.D was this cold. "Fury, I'm taking a chance here for you. The minute this proves to be more of a burden than a service, I'm ending it." The harshness of her tone shot through Y/n like a bullet but Fury appeared unphased giving her a little solace.

"You'll find the council will be grateful for what I'm doing here." Fury's proclamation seemed to grip the councilwoman, stopping her dead in her tracks as a conflicted expression fell over her features. She shot him a deadly glare however what rage bubbled up in her wasn't enough to compel her to reply and she continued on, leaving smothering tension in the air.

"What are you doing?" Y/n asked cautiously, turning to the man who had convinced her to leave her old life behind. The leather of his eyepatch squeaked in protest as his eyebrows furrowed, his eye landing on her small frame beside him.

"We are going to take the first step in protecting our world for the future. Welcome to the Next Generation Initiative." Y/n swallowed thickly to try and relieve the dryness of her throat as Fury moved toward the door.

"We start immediately." His voice called and she quickly followed after him, hoping to not agitate him further. "First let's see what you're capable of."

•••

The months that followed were hard, harder than she had naively expected. Fury was true to his word, providing her with a living space at S.H.I.E.L.D headquarters along with necessities such as food passes and clothes, though all of them sported the S.H.I.E.L.D logo.

At first it had been exciting to live a new life, the pride that came from becoming independent being enough to distract her for the first couple of weeks. But soon she found that being isolated from the rest of the agents wasn't just the normal separation from the pack that came with being new.

Communication with other agents was limited by her new guardian and her access around The Triskelion was even more restricted. It didn't take much for her to catch onto the fact that she was meant to be a secret instead of an agent.

This annoyed her but she hardly saw Fury which prevented her from questioning or even opposing the situation. And in the times she did see him she never got any answers. Fury pushed her constantly and while she knew she had signed up for it, she couldn't help but wonder if she'd made the right choice.

In order to stay at S.H.I.E.L.D she had to avoid all contact with her parents and adjusting to her new life without them was hard. The only person she had to trust with her well being was Fury and while he made sure she was taken care of, he wasn't exactly a parental figure. He was cold and abrasive and having conversations with him were frightening and offered very little support.

Her wish to be a hero convinced her that maybe it'd get better once she adjusted to the way things operated at S.H.I.E.L.D but it never did. Loneliness crept into her every second she was there and nothing she did seemed to help.

Doubt seeped into her heart and she started to question the cause she now stood for. Her parents had always rejected Fury's propositions toward making Y/n an agent but Y/n had never understood why until then. Fury was shrouded in a thick layer of mystery and the appeal it once had quickly faded away when she began to realize she had left everything behind for a promise of doing something great.

She felt like a naive and stupid child chasing the dream of being a superhero like so many children had and she longed for the guidance of her parents.

Training was even more miserable than her solitude. Fury wanted her to be ready for anything even though all of her missions so far were from the safety of a control room. He trained her himself, claiming that it was easier that way instead of taking other agents off of missions.

While she felt like it was a lie she accepted it and attended training everyday. And it wasn't long before she learned that his cold exterior was frozen all the way through.

"Agh!" Y/n cried out in frustration, forcing herself up from the ground. Fury almost smirked as she rushed forward, messily slamming her fist into his arms that had moved to block his face. A pained groan escaped her lips as she retracted her fist trying to conceal the red spotting through from under the wrap.

Another hand entered her view and she gave a defeated sigh as Fury took her bloodied knuckles. "I don't understand why I have to do this. You just want me for my brain anyways." Her irritation flooding off of her.

"It's so that nobody kills you. What good would your brain be if you're dead?" Fury said, offering no warmth or ease as he spoke. A frown tugged at her lips and she jerked her hand away, getting herself into stance.

It wasn't long before she was on her back again, her lungs struggling to replenish the air that had been knocked out of her. But Y/n found herself strangely motivated with each failure. Each time she slammed into the mat she was filled with an overwhelming amount of rage and whether it had been his plan all along she didn't know but she rose to her feet again with more strength than before.

With her fists drawn to her sides and her shoulders coming back in a brilliant pose of purpose, she stood before him anger radiating off of her. Her eyes narrowed on Fury with a determined shine and she advanced again, this time landing a hit to his ribs. While she wasn't too intimating in size, she easily calculated places to strike in which would leave the attacker most weakened and with her new found strategy, Fury fell.

Before she could even process her victory, a foreign sound echoed through the gym making her freeze. It was an eerie sound that shouldn't have sent a chill down her spine. A sound that heard from anyone else would've made her smile. Yet coming from the usually stoic man she couldn't help but recoil as if hearing it was the equivalent of being stuck.

Fury's body shook in laughter as he pushed himself up off his knees. "Motherfucker." He exclaimed, his eye landing on her with a glimpse of something she'd never seen from him before. Pride? Amusement? Either one brought a disbelieving and hesitant smile to her face as she quickly moved to help him up.

"I was wondering how many times it would take getting the crap beat out of you for you to finally put that brain of yours to use." Fury grunted, his hand coming to his ribs as he stood. Y/n's brows creased looking up at him in confusion.

"Wait, you're not mad?" She questioned, rattled by how entertained he was with her finally snapping at him. He moved to unwrap his fists looking up at her with a lifted brow.

"Am I supposed to be? Taking me down was your objective." He replied, glancing over his shoulder as she mimicked him, tugging the wrapping carefully as to avoid further hurting her split knuckles. She offered a shrug, allowing her prideful smirk to appear.

"Well, you just got taken down by a girl." Fury's gaze hardened on her cheeky grin and he shook his head, his amusement diminishing with her childish humor.

"Don't give me that bullshit. I've been training you for months, you taking me down once ain't nothing to be excited over." He grumbled, trying to dismiss her win.

Y/n's smile lingered for the rest of the day.

•••

"So what's the point of the 'Next Generation Initiative'? Aren't some of the Avengers, like, immortal?" Y/n questioned, poking at the keyboard in front of her. Fury's annoyed gaze fell on her for the fifth time in the past ten minutes and he sighed heavily pushing the keyboard away from her. She lifted her head off of her elbow and turned to face him as his chair swiveled toward her.

"Thor's practically immortal. But the rest aren't." Fury explained. Y/n reached out to grab the pen on the table only to have Fury slam his hand down on hers, forcibly stopping her. "Do you always have to mess with something?" He questioned, his tone sharp.

Y/n gave him a glare before retracting her hands and wedging them between her thighs. "What about Hulk? Not only did the gamma rays make him immortal, he can't die as either Bruce Banner or Hulk. And what about Captain America? I mean isn't he like 100?" She rambled.

Fury massaged his temples, reminding himself that he had to put up with her if he wanted his project to succeed. "96. And no he's not immortal." He corrected, ignoring Y/n's mockful expression as she rolled her eyes.

"Whatever. You didn't answer my question." She accused, shooting him an expectant gaze. He peered down at her, his brow lowering in an unamused scowl.

"Like the Avengers Initiative, Next Gen's purpose is to protect Earth from all threats, whether it be from other worlds or our own." Fury droned, his own statement seeming to bore him. He'd given the same speech to the council a million times before and he wasn't someone that cared to repeat himself. Yet in enthusiasm Y/n easily had enough for the both of them as she listened carefully to his every word, enjoying the fact that he was finally telling her something.

Sure she'd known that joining S.H.I.E.L.D especially with her skills would mean some kind of hero work. Fury had explained to her and her parents once before that with Y/n's brain she could help set the world forward into technical advances and with the right training become an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. All she knew about S.H.I.E.L.D was what could be linked to the Avengers so she had automatically been hooked but her parents didn't share her eagerness.

Yet never did she imagine becoming a part of a project similar to the Avengers, a team she'd grown up idolizing. Suddenly any doubt she'd felt washed away with her fascination toward becoming a superhero. The idea of putting her skills toward something bigger than herself was what had drawn her away from her friends and family after all.

"So, the next generation of superheroes?" She assumed, unable to hide the thrilled smile that crossed her face. Fury nodded slowly, unsure whether he should be encouraging her so much. Her unwavering grin stuck as he turned back to the computer in front of him, tapping on the keys with a quick sweep of his hand.

"Then why don't the Avengers know about me?" She questioned suddenly.

"The council doesn't want anyone to know about you. At least not until this succeeds." He answered shortly, his concentration unbroken as he did so.

"When will that be? And why aren't there more of me? I mean aren't there more superhero kids you should be scouting?" Y/n began questioning again making him sigh heavily. He was beginning to regret recruiting her, finding her intuitive and adolescent need to question everything bothersome.

"You are what we call a trial basis. That's when-"

"I know what a trial basis is. I'm not stupid." Fury's eyes narrowed on the girl who'd interrupted him, nearly chuckling at the irony of what she'd said.

"Well, then stop acting like it." He retorted, drawing an unhappy pout from her. With arms crossed and her brow creased she glared at him but he ignored her turning back to the computer.

"I'm not acting stupid. Trust me, I'm sure I'd be a lot more help if I actually knew what was going on. This is the most I've gotten you to talk since I got here." She challenged, making sure not to provoke him. If she had there'd be no way to get answers out of him. "I'm just saying I left everything to be here and you can't even give me the time of day to explain why I'm really here. Why would you recruit me? I don't have powers, I just happen to be smart. Why would you pick me to start such an important project?"

The doubt she'd been feeling for months was beginning to flood back as she confessed to him. His persistence in wanting to recruit her at the start had convinced her enough that she was worthy of being a part of whatever he had planned but now that she knew what it was she was becoming painfully aware of how minuscule she was in comparison.

Fury kept his stare focused on the monitor before him, a sigh flushing through him and escaping out his nose as his hands stilled on the keyboard. He knew she was right. All the information he'd given her up to that point was the name of the project and the vague details he'd offered her parents.

He needed to give her a sign of good faith, something to earn a bit of her trust and acceptance in order to continue with the project.

Y/n watched with an intense gaze as he grabbed the mouse, directing the cursor toward another file. Everything in her was screaming to press for an answer but the contrast in his behavior kept her from doing so. Never had he gone silent before and she wondered if this was finally it. Was he finally going to reveal his true intentions?

After effortlessly bypassing several forms of security, a file was brought up, her own picture dragging her attention away from his silence. To the left of the photo was her name, birthdate, social security number and several other pieces of information like her parents' names and her education records.

Yet beside her name was another name, this one bubbled in quotations like an alias.

"Next Generation Stark?" She read aloud, the words rolling off her tongue like she was accusing him of a lie. Fury sat back in his chair, crossing his arms as he studied her baffled face and slack jaw. "Stark? Like Tony Stark? What the hell does that mean?" She demanded, all restraint on herself to remain polite out the window upon such an absurd comparison.

Fury pierced his lips gesturing to the computer, "Exactly what it says." He told her, his tone much more matter of fact than she felt was appropriate. Her head frantically shook as she tried to make him see how absolutely insane he sounded.

"I can't be. Tony Stark is my hero and a literal superhero. Not to mention a billionaire, genius-" She was cut short by Fury sitting forward, a smirk playing on his lips as he snidely remarked.

"I thought you were a genius. IQ of 224 and all." The sarcasm practically dripped from his words and Y/n's glare returned with more intensity than before.

"If that's the only similarity between us we're going to have a lot of problems." She pointed out earning a returning glare from Fury. The fact that he was arguing with a teenager was enough to make him question his life choices but the fact that she was calling him out on the outlandishness of his operation was enough to make his blood boil.

Though his pride was unwilling, he managed to release his irritation with a deep sigh. The entire program rested on his ability to train and create the next line of defense and though it frustrated him, the only 'defense' he had was Y/n.

"Look. I didn't recruit you because I wanted you to be Stark." He began, the tension that built in his shoulders and between them easing some as he spoke. "I recruited you because you have the potential to be someone just as great."

Y/n tried to fight the warmth that spread through her chest. It had been the kindest thing said to her in months and her need to please others simply jumped for joy at the praise.

Her once defensive posture slacked a bit as she fell back against her chair, sending him an irritated yet pleased look. "You're strangely motivational. Were you born like that or did you take lessons?" She questioned, her snarky manner returning with the lightness in the air.

"I know a guy." Fury shrugged before returning to his work. Y/n rolled her eyes, growing used to the way that everything he said had to hold a bit of secretiveness.

"If you say yourself, I will slap you regardless of who you are." She replied, lifting her legs up and placing her feet up onto the desk. Fury eyed them with a disdained look before pushing them off with one swift movement.

"You know that code name is all the more fitting with that attitude of yours." He countered, slightly entertained as her feet fell back to the floor forcing her to sit up right. Her expression remained annoyed unable to muster up the effort to glare at him once more.

"Tony Stark wishes he had an attitude like mine." A short scoff escaped Fury as Y/n crossed her arms, a smug smile tugging at her lips.

•••

The months that followed were easier with her new found purpose. As Fury had hoped, giving her more details on the project insured her compliance and even inspired her to take on more tasks and missions.

It was a few months after their discussion before he decided to untrust her with Project Insight. With the help of the 15 year old genius the work went smoother and a lot of the technical issues they faced either became minor inconveniences or vanished all together.

And with her new access to the labs containing some of the most advanced technology she spent almost all her free time tinkering away. Whenever Fury asked what it was she was devoting so much time and energy to, she immediately shut him down, a little embarrassed by the idea of telling him.

But it didn't stop him from checking surveillance in the lab. He had to confess it was a pretty good replica of the famous Iron Man though he'd never tell her. He was almost tempted to alert Stark that his precious suit wasn't as exclusive as he'd hoped.

Though it was slow at first and unwanted, Fury grew used to Y/n's presence and rather than a nuisance she became a normal figure in his life. He'd never admit it but whenever she wasn't at his side or where he'd left her a small bit of panic would set in. The instinct Maria pointed out to be paternal was often and annoyed him beyond belief but happened nonetheless.

The feeling seemed to be mutual because Y/n frequently came to him with anything and everything that happened during her day to which he reluctantly listened.

"Some of the other agents were talking about their countdowns. I can't wait to get mine." Y/n spoke, glancing up at Fury as he faintly listened from his desk. Not yet satisfied without his full attention, a mischievous smirk curved onto her features and she leaned on her palm to look at him. "Who's your soulmate?"

The hard stare he directed at her would've been enough to make a grown man quake but Y/n had become immune to such glares. "None of your business." He replied, his tone callous and indifferent. But Y/n noticed something, a fleeting glance to his left just before he spoke.

Her knowing smile riled through him and he huffed, moving aside his monitor to properly scowl at her. "Is it Maria? Nah she's too nice to be your soulmate. Or maybe it's one of those opposites attract types of situations?" Y/n unleashed every thought that buzzed through her mind and Fury wasn't sure which one to be most enraged by. So he remained silent, allowing her curiosity to brew.

Sensing his disinterest in answering her she sat up, moving to climb to her feet. "Well, I guess I'll just have to ask Ms. Hill." The sigh that filled the air was playful as if getting the answers she so wanted was a chore but Fury knew she had no issue in seeking out the woman in question.

"Leave her be. She's leading a covert mission right now." He cautioned. Y/n paused, sinking back into her chair as he folded his hands. "She's my soulmate, is that what you want to hear?" His confession sent a bit of joy through her from being right but she didn't speak her pride, instead allowing him to continue.

"When she joined S.H.I.E.L.D we found out we were soulmates but we never let it get in the way of our work." The explanation came easily but the troubled expression on his face was anything but. She almost felt a bit guilty for dragging the truth out of him.

"So you guys aren't together?" For the first time ever, she watched him shift uncomfortably. His action only seemed to urge her to press more, sensing him beginning to crack.

"We are a part of the percentage of the world with platonic soulmates." He described. She nodded slowly, not believing him for a second. She may have only been there for a little under a year but she had never seen such a profound bond between two people. A little envy from their relationship had established itself in her even if it was a 'platonic' relationship.

"Does she know that?"

Fury froze, his single eye widening ever so slightly. She'd struck a nerve.

"Y'know what? I'm done telling you shit." Fury snapped, turning away from her with an agitated growl. Y/n instantly sat forward, guilt grasping hold of her creased brow as she scrambled to apologize.

"Wait no, I'm sorry. I'm sorry." It came rushed but was heard making Fury haltingly glance back up at her. Her lip had been pulled back between her teeth as she chewed at it nervously. "My-my mom used to tell me that just because I know a lot doesn't mean I need to know everything. She usually keeps me in check but-..."

Her words dropped off into a deafening silence. Y/n tended to question everything and while her mother believed it to be some form of OCD her father argued it was just her paranoia. Whatever the case it led to a lot of frustration for those who were being interrogated and Y/n realized for the past year Fury had been the focus of that.

His hardened expression faltered and if one truly studied his expressions they would recognize a bit of remorse had surfaced to match her own.

"I really miss her. My dad, too." Y/n confessed, solemn and longing. "I wonder if they're mad at me. Maybe that's why they haven't tried to visit me."

An unfamiliar pang of guilt hit Fury's heart and his gaze fell onto the file in front of him. Anywhere to avoid looking at the child before him. How was he supposed to tell her that her parents had tried to see her? Tell her that each time he sent them away, insisting she was safe and that they should leave? Tell her how many letters and calls they'd received from them over the past year in hopes it might reach her.

How did he begin to make up for such a wrong yet necessary act?

"Maybe it's time you visited them." The statement left him before he even had a chance to properly analyze it. What was he thinking? Letting her leave would compromise the whole project.

But he couldn't help it. Something deep inside him needed to make up for all the secrets and lies and his unwanted connection to the girl only justified his actions.

"Really?" Fury nodded, yet again surprising the both of them.

"I'll have an agent take you tomorrow. But only under one circumstance." He told her, the seriousness he was known for returning. She nodded instantly ready to pay whatever price to see her family.

"You must come back to S.H.I.E.L.D."

A tense feeling she'd only felt upon her arrival rested in the air, easily thick enough to make her choke. But the excitement she felt outweighed any rational thought.

"I promise."

Part three

92 notes · View notes

zuffer-weird-girl · 4 years

Text

Not happening. (Not again)

He sighed in pure annoyance and hatred while walking slowly behind the desperate girl that was running and whimpering for help on that filthy alley.

He didn't even wasted his energy running after, because he knew that no matter what, that girl would always come back to him by force or by will. Especially when she didn't want it any more deaths happening because of her curse...

Nobody understanded. Nobody. Eri's blood was essential for reviving the old man's wish and dream... and to free his dear one from her curse.

He didn't had much time...

"Sir?" The doctor spoked aprehensively with Chisaki while you got out from the hospital bed "Mind if we talk for just a bit?... alone?"

He arched his eyebrow in pure disgust and annoyance while you giggled and waved your hands up in the air.

"Is okay! I will get out." You looked at Chisaki with a smile before discretely caresing his gloved hand "I will wait for you outside on the waiting room, right?"

"Be careful." He said simply, the moment you closed the door his body immediately froze while his gut told him subsconciously that.. something bad was going to happen.

This usually appeared minutes before he saw you dying...

"Overhaul sir..." the doctor sighed with grief "About your partner's quirk.."

"Spit it out." He growled while glaring daggers at the doctor.

"... you might want to take a seat." The man showed with his palm at the chair in fron of his desk.

Despite being so aprehensive, and dare he say anxious, he sitted slowly, glaring at him for answers. The man sighed, while locking his hands together on the desk.

"She has not much time left." Kai's eyes widened like they never had before on his life, gloves dissapearing in one blink of a eye.

"..what?" He breathed out, his spine going colder and colder by the infuriating tic and toc from that clock hanging on the wall.

"Her quirk. I treated her father once, so I sadly know the deal..." he looked up at Chisaki with a sour expression "Pardon me for asking... but how many times did she..?"

"... I almost lost count. But I guess it was... 119..."

The doctor winced before taking inhaling, preparing to bring the bad news for the young man in front of him.

"Quirks like that have a certain... limit of atturing themselfs... You can guess that by many times she got weaker and more fragile to some of accidents right?" He saw Chisaki nodding a bit trembly.

"That means her body is not taking anymore... Overhaul, I am afraid to say this... but if she suffers another accident or even much loss of blood... her quirk is not going to work anymore and..."

"Will not... be back." He ßaid in oure horror while the doctor nodded sadly, never once expecting to see such a face on the yakusa boss future leader.

"I am afraid so... Her father died by something so indignant, he fell down some stairs, something that it seems normal for us. But his wife told me that he had presented death by the number 119... just like your partner out there."

His heart dropped to his stomach as his eyes remained wide... one more. One more and you would be gone for real...

"You can't tell me there isn't a fucking cure for this." He hissed teh words, griping on his pants so hard that his knuckles turned white.

"Only by a miracle... maybe if her quirl was removed or something, her cells of the body would be slowly recuperating their strenght and health..." he sighed "But that's impossible. Unless you have someone like Eraserhead in your house and keeps using his quirk on her."

He lifted up abruptly from his chair, scaring a bit the man before he nodded and left his room with a bitter and insufferable taste on hsi mouth.

He opened the door and bites his tongue to not just cry and fall on your arms when he saw you reading some magazine and gently waved at him when noticed presence.

One more time.. and he would lose this...

"So. Any bad news?" You asked worriedly before he carresed your cheek, sighing in relief when your face melt in bliss at his touch.

"No. No, nothing of bad news." He lied bitterly before walking besides you "Just warnings for you to be more.. careful."

"Does he know it doesn't depend on me?" You asked sadly, frow returning "It just happens out of no where... you know that."

He sighed trembling before reaching for your hand, pushing you gently for him to be on the side of the street instead.

"I know this better than anyone angel... trust me." He sighed heavily, you tilted your head at his expression.

He wasn't wearing that stoic facade of his... he seemed more... angry? Desperate? Even determined you would guess.

"Kai? Did he said something else?" You pried, only receuving a shake of his head and a squeeze on your hand.

You... had a bad feeling about this... yet, couldn't tell what it was...

She stills keep running even knowing that he will get her after... seriously, he knew that childs were dumb but why keep making him waste energy and time?

He doesn't have time for her tantrums. He has to make those bullets for testing, curing his angel and prepared the marketing of the bullets on the underground.

Crush hero society. Cure the world from the hero syndrome. Bring the yakusa back to their glory days.... save his (Y/n)...

Those were the only things that kept him living. That gave a life purpose...

He wouldn't let Pops or his angel down. He knew that. He was going to prove this.

"Have you completly lost your humanity Chisaki?" Pops asked in pure horror after interrupting Kai's explanation from his plan.

Again. Again being refused. Why he can't understand that he just wants to repay him?! Is that difficult to get that this is for him and her?!

"... Lost my humanity?" He said darkly, walking slowly towards the elder "You took me in, I just want to repay you."

He lowered a bit his glove with his thumb, the elder catching what was happening before Chisaki continued.

"Lost my humanity you say? Tell me pops. How would you feel if your father figurine turned your ideas down constantly? Or even better yet.." he looked Pops dead in the eye, clenching his jaw while controling himself to not just break down.

"How would you feel if the love and light of your life, simply had a curse that just can't be cured. Keeps dying in front of your eyes every damn time... if you got something to cure them you would take it wouldn't you?"

He aproached even more and his glove fell down...

"Just lay back and relax. Is going to hurt just for a moment."

He growled at her sudden pleas starting to come out while she runned and kept looking back at him.

He had to do this. Stop running like a damn pest.

"He what?!" You asked in horror while lifting youserlf from the couch, immediately coming to him with hands on his arms.

He was pleased when he discovered that Pops and you grew found of each other... this explained your reaction when he told about his... current condition.

"Kai I'm so sorry..." you said almost tearing while he only stared into your eyes.

"Is not a problem. He is going to be alright soon. I know it." He carresed your cheek before frowing. "What are these clothes for?"

You looked down at yourself and your gym clothes, making a confused noise while looking back at him.

"What's the matter with them? I was going in for a run like I always do. Remember? Around the block?"

His eyes darkened in worry and hatred. No. You couldn't get out. What if something happened?

"You're not going." He growled while you arched a eyebrow at his tone of voice.

He never once lowered his voice with you excluding in some couple fights which were rare... so why?

"Excuse me?" You asked in disbelief "I was going with Ku-"

"Not with Chrono. Not with Mimic. Not with ANYONE." He growled whiel he glared daggers at you "You're not getting out of this place."

You tsked in anger before turning in your feet to walk out before he grabbed your wrist.

"Kai let g-!"

"You're NOT leaving this house. Understand (Y/n)?"

"Give me a good reason then!" You shouted this time, not even caring about how he despised those things.

"You want to just die outside like the other times? Is that it?!" He hissed in pure anger while you gasped in disbelief.

"Chisaki is only around THE BLOCK."

"You can be attacked. Suffer a car accident. Hell even trip in your own foot by how careless you are!"

"Is this worry now?" You laughed bitterly before yanking a bit your hand... without success on getting out of his grasp.

"Yes it is dammit! I'm tired of seing the only light on my dark life dying over anD OVER AGAIN!" He shouted, catching you off guard immediately.

A uncomfortable silence got between teh both of you while he breathed in and out to catch his breath and his compusture back.

He flinched a bit at your hand in his cheek before looking at you.

"I know it hurts... I told you many times that you can let go of me-"

"Like hell I would." He growled, grabbing your hand on his cheek and pressing it even more to hsi face.

You made one of your most sad and broken face before oushing him in for a hug. He catched you again off of guard when he wrapped without hesitation his arms around your waist and buries his face on the crook of your neck.

"... You know that always I will come back to you right?"

He broke at those words... knowing exactly that this time it wasn't true.

He let out a cry and just burried his teary eyes in your neck as his back shocked with every sob pass through his lips.

He couldn't lose you...

Ah great... that brat bumped into some hero...

He inhale to remain his compusture and to remain pacient while talking with those socks.

"You should be more careful." He started, Eri looking at him with terror "We don't want to cause any problems for the heroes."

The green haired boy looked up at him with the same look Eri gabe to him while the older and blonde one just gave him a look.

"Let's go home. Eri."

#overhaul x reader #overhaul scenario #fanfic overhaul #overhaul #chisaki kai imagine scenario #kai chisaki x reader #chisaki kai x reader #chisaki kai #kai chisaki #bnha x reader #bnha imagine #bnha characters #bnha villains #bnha #my writing #zuffer writings

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just-a-light-among-the-stars · 4 years

Text

Mine (Lucifer x Sad!OC One Shot)

Okay, so this isn't my first time writing, but it is my first time posting anything like that on this platform, so please excuse the possibly terrible format. I made this using a friend's OC to cheer them up because they were feeling down, so I please also excuse how hasty it looks. I literally started writing this the moment she told me and it took me exactly 2 hours to finish. Let me say at this point that this was mildly inspired by the Lucifer kiss scene on the last chapter, but it's also quite different.

Rating: PG-13 (?) /SFW-ish

Anyway, I hope you all enjoy~

Vanni's life has been turned upside down ever since she arrived at the Devildom. She was forced to live in a place far away from home and attend school there while cohabiting with seven strangers. And the strangers were seven of the most powerful demons in history on top of it all. As bizarre as it may sounded, however, she was able to adjust to her new life there. And she owed it all to a certain demon; the eldest of the seven brothers, the Avatar of Pride, Lucifer.

Because of how fussy he was over making the exchange program a success for Diavolo's sake, he would always make sure Vanni was safe and satisfied with her stay in the Devildom. Even though she knew he was doing it purely because of business, Vanni was happy that he was so meticulous with his task and he never hesitated to help her with any troubles she was finding along the way. Before she knew it, she had become attached to him. She was seeing him in a new light more and more as the days passed, until the day came that she admitted to herself that she was in love with him.

But it was something she swore she would never tell Lucifer. Because she wasn’t merely infatuated by him. She respected and revered the man with all her heart and soul. She loved how dedicated, hardworking and loyal he was. She loved how he would show his care for his younger brothers in his own peculiar ways. She loved how his brows would furrow deeply when he was concentrating on his work or was thinking about some mischief his brothers had gotten themselves into again. She loved how he would always allow her to stay with him on his study as he worked with the condition that she wouldn’t bother him. She loved how he cared about her in the smallest yet most meaningful ways.

She loved everything about him.

And that was something she couldn’t help but think of constantly. Yet, today wasn’t one of those days. She didn’t know how or why, but she was feeling rather miserable today. At first, she could not understand why she was feeling like this. School was great, the brothers were all nice to her most of the time and she had a great time living with them. Her life was anything but boring down there at the Devildom. And yet, somehow, she was still having the urge to cry. She was still having the urge to let it all out and break down for no apparent reason. But she couldn’t do that. Not when she was still in Lucifer’s study.

The man was working relentlessly to make sure she would get through her year in the Devildom without problems, so who was she to simply add more problems on his plate? She loved him. She was already upset enough to see him collapsed over his desk oftentimes when she would bring him coffee, so making him stressed out because of her was out of the question. Wanting to prevent that, she slowly stood up from the chair across Lucifer’s desk and made sure not to make a sound as she tried to walk out, heading back to her room to let all the frustration out without being seen.

However, fate had other plans for her.

“Are you going somewhere, Vanni?”

Lucifer’s monotonous, tired voice stopped her in her tracks, but she didn’t dare turn around to face him as she started feeling more tears welling up her eyes.

“I think...I’m going to call it a night.” she replied in a low voice. “I’ll be heading to my room now. Goodnight, Lucifer.”

Vanni might have thought what she wanted of him, but the demon wasn’t born yesterday. The strained sound of her voice and her silent sniffling was enough to get his attention as he put down his pen and spoke up in his usual authoritative voice.

“Wait.”

As much as she didn’t want to, she complied. There was something irresistible about him using that tone that she couldn’t pinpoint. But whenever she heard it, she was rendered immobile. She gulped as she heard him tap his fingers on the desk and wait in silence for a while, but soon flinched upon hearing the voice she had come to love so much address her again.

“Come here.”

“But-” she tried to protest, but she knew by now it was to no avail.

“Come.”

At this point, she had completely given up. With slow, insecure movements, she turned around and started heading towards his desk with her head low as she took smaller and smaller steps. Lucifer was waiting patiently until she reached him, watching her every movement through blood red eyes, as if reading the situation. Vanni, on the other hand, was feeling remorseful. She didn’t like troubling Lucifer any more than his brothers and Diavolo already troubled him, and she didn’t want to trouble him with matters as insignificant as this.

What was she supposed to say to him anyway, she thought as she made her way towards the carved wooden desk. She had no particular reason to be sad. Everything was perfect. The brothers were all nice to her, the angels and Solomon would often hang around her too, Diavolo was also willing to answer to most of her requests and Lucifer made her happy just by being there. Everything she ever wanted was there with her. Everything except from...her family and friends back home.

She made a full stop once she came to that realization.

She had never felt homesick before, so why now? Why did it have to happen so suddenly? And, more importantly, what was she supposed to tell Lucifer? Here he was, working himself to the point of exhaustion for her and the exchange program and she was feeling like this. She knew that she had no right to be this way, but she couldn’t help it. As much as she loved everything in the Devildom, she was still a human. Her home was still the Earth. And everything she loved was up there with it.

“Vanni?” Lucifer asked, snapping her out of her trance.

Widening her eyes, she lowered her head in shame and picked up her pace, arriving right next to the demon’s desk and slightly bowing her head in apology.

“I’m sorry, Lucifer. I just got lost in thought.”

Normally, she wasn’t like this. She wasn’t so weak and vulnerable. But there was something about the moment and the way Lucifer’s eyes stared into hers that made a stray tear she had been fighting back finally escape her eyes. Once the first tear fell, it was all over. The other tears all fell like a storm from her eyes, causing the slightest of changes in Lucifer’s normally cold and stoic expression. Seeing that, Vanni started apologizing profusely once again, burying her face in her hands to hide it from plain view.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry...” she mumbled through her tears. “Even though I didn’t want to bother you...”

What happened next though, she couldn’t have predicted it in a million years. Her wrist was grabbed a bit forcefully and she was dragged down by the arm, landing on the demon’s lap in the process, who lifted her chin with one of his gloved hands.

“Lu...Lucifer?!”

Her bewilderment couldn’t be described with words. But, in contrast to that, Lucifer was completely calm. He didn’t reply for a while; he simply held her face in that position, forcing her to maintain eye contact with him. It was only after a few minutes that he eventually let go of it, but not of her.

“What’s wrong?” he began asking. “Did one of my brothers do something?”

“No...” she reluctantly replied.

“Then, is your stay at the Devildom somehow unsatisfactory?” he pressed.

“No!”

That, she denied it with all her might. She wouldn’t invalidate Lucifer’s hard work and dedication even if it killed her. Trying to dodge the subject, she put on one of her best smiles and properly faced him, making sure to sound as persuasive as possible.

“It really is nothing you should concern yourself ab-”

“Vanni.”

Her vile effort to get out of this died as fast as it was attempted, and at this point, she couldn’t hold it back anymore. She broke down into hysterics and made her best attempt to speak through the mess she currently was.

“It’s...It’s my family and my friends...” she trailed off. “I know how ungrateful I sound...especially with everything you have been doing about me since I came here. Even though it’s just business to you...to me...it was everything. It helped me settle down, relax and have a great time when I would have otherwise dreaded my fate for the rest of the year. I owe you more than you can imagine, and that’s why...that’s why I didn’t want to burden you with this. I didn’t want to tell you how much I missed them...”

After she finished her rant, nothing was said for a while. But that didn’t mean there was silence. Lucifer let his actions speak louder than his words ever could when he took his glove off and cupped her cheek with his right hand, causing Vanni to look up at him again with wide eyes.

“Ah...!”

“Understandable.” he interrupted her before she could say anything else. “I sometimes find myself thinking of how things would be after the year was over and you returned to the human world as well. I keep thinking of whether you are going to leave the Devildom with a year full of great memories that will stay with you in the human world. That is what Diavolo’s exchange program is all about, and that is how I want to carry it out at any cost. But, I also keep thinking of how my brothers would miss you; possibly enough to either become dysfunctional or cause a ruckus.”

Vanni didn’t know why, but as the conversation went on, she was feeling more and more honest with her feelings. And that honesty, she wanted to project it to Lucifer as well. Even though she knew she would probably regret asking that question, she knew she might never get any other chance to do it. And so she took it.

“What about you? Would you miss me, Lucifer?”

If the demon was taken aback by this, he didn’t show. Instead, his face morphed into one of pure amusement as his beautiful red eyes narrowed and his lips curved upwards ever so slightly as he leaned towards her in an appropriate distance; not too close but not too far away either.

“Do you want me to miss you?”

Unlike the Avatar of Pride, Vanni had no remorse showing how much his words shocked her. And yet, what shocked her more was her own self. The moment was just too ideal, and she was becoming more daring as the seconds passed; more greedy for his attention. She knew she’d end up confessing her love if things went on like this, but she couldn’t care less at this moment. Right now, all she cared about was him. All she wanted...it was him.

“Yes I do.” she daringly replied, causing Lucifer to raise an eyebrow. “Because I know I definitely would. Your presence has become...so important to me. Even though I miss my family, I cannot imagine a day when I wake up and don’t have breakfast with you and your brothers. Or not going to RAD and taking classes together. Greeting you in the hallways, then having lunch together and even studying together whenever I have problems with my homework. Even those little moments when I sit with you in the study and watch you work...even though we say nothing, your presence alone is so comforting to me. It has become such a necessity in my life that I can’t think of how I lived before I met you anymore. Nor can I think of how my life is going to be without you after this year ends.” she concluded, gulping slightly before mouthing her next words. “Because, despite my efforts, I have come to love you so much I can’t stand it. I love you, Lucifer.”

There were many moments of silence between them prior to this, but this one felt the most deafening to her. She regretted confessing the moment the words ‘I love you’ left her mouth, and she couldn’t stop thinking about the consequences this would have. Bringing all the worst possible scenarios inside her head made her shed tears once again and she brought her hands up to wipe them off.

However, that action was stopped midway. She didn’t manage to make another move as Lucifer grabbed both of her wrists and leaned a bit closer, kissing away all of her tears one by one. His lips were soft as they caressed her cheek, even as roughly as they did, but also meticulous as they made sure not to leave a single spot unkissed, causing Vanni to freeze once more.

“L-Lucifer?!”

“I have always known you wanted to say this.” the Avatar of Pride admitted as he planted another rough kiss on her jawline, where some stray tears were running down her neck. “I also know what you need to let your mind off those woeful emotions right now.”

His lips caressed her jawline some more, travelling down her neck, leaving possessive marks and butterfly kisses all over the area. He didn’t leave a single spot unclaimed. Meanwhile, Vanni’s breath had become rugged. Soft moans escaped her lips with every inch of her that he claimed as he unbuttoned the first two buttons of her blouse and lowered it just enough to expose her collarbone and shoulder, which he also began claiming in a slow, agonizing manner.

“Surrender yourself to me tonight; all night long, until the break of dawn.” he spoke between kisses, his hot breath tickling her skin and awakening each of her senses at once. “I’m not letting anyone else have you now. You are mine.”

She bit her lip to unsuccessfully suppress an even louder moan that escaped her lips as he bit the skin of her collarbone, before leaning away and looking into her eyes as he took his other glove out using his teeth, and then cupping her cheeks with both hands, pulling her close to him and forcefully parting her lips with his tongue as one of his hands left her cheek and traveled down her spine, all the way to the small of her back. Pulling her closer and deepening the kiss, he eventually pulled away with a bite on her bottom lip, finishing what he was previously trying to say.

“Surrender yourself to me tonight, and I promise you-” he paused to lean in closer, stopping one breath away from her lips. “I shall be the only one you will be thinking about until the break of dawn.”

#obey me #obey me otome #obey me!#obey me shall we date #obey me luficer

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dollface13bish-blog · 5 years

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Tom Holland x Ballerina! Reader (Part 1)

Tom Holland x Ballerina! Reader

_____

It was a long tiring day of Pirouettes and Grande Jeté for Tom, he agreed to do a short video with a very kind young man call Joel, a short film of Joel's story of his path in ballet learning it from Africa to England... It was a powerful and great documentary and thought it wasn't very long in a video it took hours of filming and Tom was honestly beyond exhausted.

The crew and director told him it was a wrap and they can all go home already, as much fun as Tom had to film the video he was eager to head home after the long day of spinning and flipping in a dance studio then to see Tessa and just lay on the bed doing nothing.

He packed his bag and took his phone out then headed out the door looking around his surroundings making sure it was clear of people for him to walk while looking at his phone and when it was he immediately went to Twitter then looked at the messages he received while he was filming, as he was taking a turn from the hallway to go to the staircase at the end of it he noticed a bunch of younger kids probably aged 5 to 10 were crowding around that one room looking at something.

Tom's presence wasn't noticed since the kids were way too distracted by something that was going on in that room and as he got closer he heard a piece of melodic music playing that he wasn't familiar with, he stopped behind the kids who were blocking him from getting closer to see the scene but fortunately he was taller than all of them giving him a clear view from his height, and quite honestly the view he got was beyond what he imagined.

In that room there was only one person, a girl with (H/C) hair that was tied into a tight bun with a few strands of hair out framing her face, she wore a black camisole leotard that had it's straps 'X' at the back, she had black stockings worn underneath with pink pointe shoes on her feet.

There she danced elegantly, her body moved with the music like her body was a river moving with the flow...he can see all her curves arch and stretch as she goes on pointe or leap with her fitting leotard that hugged her body beautifully, there wasn't a single fault at all as she moved...when the chorus hits she went into 'Attitude' position before twirling and flying into a leap landing gracefully before continuing going across the floor with Pique Turns, she was continuing ready to leap again but Tom missed it when a dance teacher came looking for the children, the kids gave their whines and upset pouts as the teacher came and told them it's time for their class to start and they dragged their feet back and started saying how they wanted to see the entire dance and how amazing it was, the teacher looked in the studio and gave a small smile as she looked at the dance display and said to Tom without looking at him

"Beautiful isn't it, every move...every leap... everything, even her...is gorgeous."

The woman said in a thick African accent, Tom then rips his attention off and chuckles embarrassed by how enchanted he was by the girls dance as he responded

"Yeah... It is very beautiful, and so is she..."

He said whisperings the last part hoping the lady didn't hear that but of course she did,

"Well..."

She paused and grazed her fingers across her box braids bun making sure it's neat in place

"She has been working hard for the big performance for months... wouldn't hurt to give a review, sure she'll feel more relaxed hearing a nice comment."

The lady smiled and walked off to her class, Tom didn't get to ask if that was okay to go in there and all that came out of his mouth was

"O-okay."

She made her turn across the hallway and Tom breathed out and looked back into the room with the mysterious girl dancing, she went into fifth position and did small spins across and stood at one leg pointe with her other leg up as high up as she can so it'll look like a split, she paused there as the music drum rolled intensely like she was waiting for the bass to drop so she can do an epic leap into the air but while she was in position Tom took note of her face and how she maintained it's calmness while in a very uncomfortable and painful position, it was so unreal how she could look so alluring and graceful...

The dance ended after the girl was in final position and gave a courtesy bow facing the mirror, Tom couldn't help but clap and the girls' eyes moved to look at the door from the mirror where Tom stood, she smiled kindly and walked to her bag at the mirror side grabbing her water bottle

"I didn't realize I had an audience...or rather a spectator, would've turned around while bowing courtesy."

She said as she drank her water while she had her leg on a bar to stretch her joints and muscles

"Oh er...I was just passing by and I saw a bunch of kids...so I came by and saw you dance..."

Tom didn't really know what to say, he was usually fine with talking to strangers but he didn't know why this particular girl made him so nervous and flustered, she, on the other hand, was calm and smooth the entire time

"Well... the kids do that often, sometimes they even try to follow which ends up being a large mess but I'm glad to see them with such determination and motivation."

She said sincerely, as she thought of the kids that come look at her dance every now and then

"Yeah...it is to see young kids look up to you and be inspired by you to pursue their dreams, makes all the hard work feel worth it."

Tom agreed, meaning every word he said... finally, he wasn't stuttering he though

"Exactly, well it was really nice meeting you...see you around?"

"Y-yea...I guess."

The girl had her leg off the bar and got on the floor stretching out her joints, Tom was a bit upset that he didn't know what other kinds of conversation to make with this girl without sounding like he was trying too hard so he turned and walked down the hallway to the exit but the weird urge in his gut to just turn around and say something, a voice in his head was just screaming that if he doesn't say something now he is gonna regret it, probably his conscience speaking or... yelling.

Suddenly his body moved on its own and he was walking...then fast walking...the running back to room as his heart was pounding out of his chest, he held the door to stop running as the girl was starting her music but heard loud and fast footsteps that stopped outside her door and turned around to look at that boy from before panting with his hands on his knees, she gave a surprise expression...before she can think of a reason why he was back here he blurted out

"You'reaverybeautifuldancer."

He blurted out so quickly it was barely audible but the girl understood what he said...but being a bit of a tease she pretended she didn't get that, she stopped what she was doing and got up walked gracefully to the boy with quiet steps stopping in front of him, she was shorter than him by a few inches so she looked up to look him in the eye...that made him a bit red but he didn't avert eye contact, instead he returned it.

Tom was far from embarrassed by his move but so far saw that she had no creeped out or disgusted expression, instead she got up and walked gracefully towards him...how is it that even by walking she can look so majestic he wondered, she stopped right in front of him their faces inches apart because of height difference, her eyes stared into his like she was trying to figure out something in him and he too couldn't get his eyes off hers, her eyes were a beautiful shade of (E/C) and they were shining with the light coming from the large window at the side of the studio, she had a very alluring scent that he can sort of make out, it was vanilla rose...with something else he couldn't point out.. honestly, he felt like a creep noticing these things but he couldn't help it, something about her was just so... uniquely beautiful

The silence between them was broken when she spoke in a gentle melodic tone...it was soft almost like a whisper just for him to hear and Tom swore he forgot how to breathe for a sec

"Say that again...I didn't catch it."

"Er... I-I said you were beautiful- NO- You're not beautiful, your dance was incredibly beautiful- NO WAIT, T-that's not what I mean, I don't mean you're not beautiful you are beautiful but I meant to say you-I MEAN, YOUR dance is beautiful and so are you. Your dance AND you are both exquisitely gorgeous..."

If there was an open window behind Tom right now he swore he will jump right out of it, he tried to play it cool but nope... his completely flustered expression and stuttering got the best of him, his eyes were squint shut as he was ready to get scoffed at for saying 'You're not beautiful' or maybe even slapped in the face but it for some reason neither happened so he opened one eye and saw the girl still there with a stoic face but suddenly she snorted and lets out a giggle then a loud laughter, it was extremely adorable, her laughter was pretty contagious but Tom couldn't laugh yet as he still felt like a fool

"Y-You..haha, are so cute...HAHAHA, oh my gosh... but thank you."

She said unable to control her laughter and cracked at the end from laughing, she wipes off a laugh tear coming out and saw how red Tom turned the moment she said he was cute and continued the laughter

"You're so sweet... honestly that was so kind and thoughtful to say, I needed some comments on the recital but I didn't want to spoil the dance for them on the actual date itself...so thank you."

She was still a bit giggly but was calmer and finally, Tom was able to chuckle out in relief that the girl didn't hate him or find him odd

"You're welcome...it was all honest words so keep up the great work... Ms...?..."

He didn't know her name...7 minutes he spent enthralled by her dance and 5 minutes he spent trying to talk to her like a normal human being...12 minutes in total and he didn't even ask for her name...now that's a bit embarrassing especially now when he tries to use it

"Oh goodness, where are my etiquettes...how rude of me, well my name is Y/N, Y/N L/N and you are..."

"Oh er, Tom Holland."

He thought her name was beautiful, it rolls off the tongue and it really matched her beauty and elegance

"Tom Holland... your name sounds familiar...do I know you?"

She had her thumb on her lip in a thinking motion as if she were trying to remember where she heard it before but Tom helped out

"Er... I'm actually an actor so you may have seen me in a few films.."

"Films? I don't watch a lot of movies unfortunately but I think that I may have seen one you were in... Were you in 'Heart of the sea' ?"

Tom wasn't really expecting people to remember him through that film, not since he became Spiderman

"... Yeah, yeahhh, that was 4 years ago..."

"It was a wonderful film...very powerful, inspired by the story Moby Dick, classic tale, you were great in it, really captured the expression and feels of the story, it's a real talent"

Tom blushed at that comment...Y/N liked his acting and thought he was talented,

"So what other films were you in?"

She headed back into the room and Tom followed behind, looking around the studio and all the mirror in front of them

"There was...'The impossible'...I was 15, and...my favourite role was being Spiderman."

He said proudly, Y/N turned around and looked at him.

"You play Spiderman?"

That really made Tom's heart dropped a bit,

"I, unfortunately, don't watch superhero movies or anything like comics or action films cause...being a ballerina I watch more French films or just ballet performances than anything in the world, but honestly if I had to choose a superhero... it'll be Spiderman."

Y/N said honestly, she had to watch Spiderman when she used to watch her nephew and though she wasn't exactly interested in the film she did think Spiderman was a very interesting and righteous character, but Spiderman she watched was played by Andrew Garfield,

"Oh, so you like Spiderman more?"

Tom asked eagerly, quite ecstatic to hear her favourite was the character he was playing

"Yeah, you know use to watch my nephew and little boys love superheroes so ended up watching shit loads of DC and Marvel films, Superman, wonder woman, Ironman, Captain America, Thor, Spiderman...you know the lot."

"Yeah, so who did your nephew like most?"

"Honestly, he loved Ironman, probably cause Ironman gets to fly and has a cool suit."

Y/N chuckled at that thought how her nephew fanboys over Ironman and how he flipped out when he got an action figure of it

"Hahaha, of course...kids love Ironman."

Tom thought it was adorable, he loved Ironman and Robert Downey Junior growing up so he was as much as a fanboy as her nephew, they had a little laugh together and talked a bit more but soon Tom had to go and Y/N had to practice,

"Well...it was nice meeting you."

Y/N goes first and Tom gives a half smile

"Yea...nice meeting you too."

Tom gives a wave and turns to head for the door as Y/N watches, he looked a bit disappointed like he wanted to hang out a bit more and honestly, Y/N kinda wanted to as well but she has to rehearse,

"Wait!"

Y/N called out stopping Tom in his tracks and he turned around a bit too fast

"I was thinking...since you saw my rehearsal, would... you like to see the actual performance."

She suggested with a hopeful smile and Tom blushed and said

"P-performance? Yours, well er, I- yeah, YEAH. I'm sure since there's no filming- yeah I can go, *cough*."

He stuttered out trying his best to sound smooth

"Great... Glad to hear that, so what's your number."

"My, my what?"

Y/N chuckled at his surprised reaction

"Number...I going to have to send you the location... details, tickets."

She raised an eyebrow like it was obvious and chuckled as she finished her sentence and Tom turned completely red from that, he passed her his phone as she puts her number in and his into hers

"And maybe if you'd like you could ask me out and we could go to the after party together..."

"Yes! I mean *cough*, yeah sure... Will you go to the after with me?"

Y/N laughed at his sweet 'Invitation' as she closes the distance between them leaning towards him as their noses almost touch from her being on Tip toes

"Yes, I'll go with you."

Giving him a soft peck on the cheek and turned back to play her music and goes into starting position,

"See you on the big day, Tom ."

She says as the song plays and she starts to dance,

"Yeah see you...Y/N."

He touches the side of the cheek that Y/N kissed and makes a turn and was out of her sight, and he started jumping up and down exclaiming 'YES!' under his breath as he strolled down the staircase, he may look kinda stupid with his big goofy grin, his hand on his cheek and holding his phone to his chest like it was his child but he didn't mind, he was way to buoyant to care.

....

Fast forward to that night Tom can't stop thinking about Y/N, he looked at his phone and her number wanting to send a text or maybe just call but kept having this weird anxiety chanting inside his head saying stuff like

'You're way too forward.'

'She'll probably be creeped out if you call.'

'C' mon she just invited you to a performance what did you think she meant?'

'She knew you from a role where you were playing just a lanky boy.'

Oh does he hate having these feels and thoughts overcome him when all he wants to do is to text someone, he has text tons of people but damn this was stressful...he even believed that texting Queen Elizabeth II would be easier than this.

But finally he lay on his bed a wrote a simple 'Hey.' in the messaging box and looked at it for minutes...is that too little? Or too much? And he decided to make it less awkward and stiff so he added a smiling emoji, he looked at the text for another 5 minutes and finally said fuck it and sent the text, he threw his phone to his side and covered his face with his hands and threw his head back and groaned in agony immediately regretting everything he's done but suddenly his phone's messaging tone rang and he fell off his bed and grabbed his phone quickly opening it to see it was a reply from Y/N.

Y/N was at home and just finished her shower and was in a comfortable white cotton robe, she got on the couch with ice packs on her legs after her hours of rehearsal, she switched on the television with a bowl of soup on her hand and laid on her side having her hand be a head support as she switches the channels trying to find something interesting to watch... Times like these make her wish she didn't live alone in her apartment... she's got all this space and an amazing view of the city from where she sat but still...all this and all her friends yet she still felt the silence echoing through her hallways... Suddenly she got on the certain channel and saw the new Spiderman trailer, usually she would've skipped it but she didn't, maybe cause the a certain someone was behind that Spiderman mask and like she thought it was him, the boy that 'asked' her to the ballet after party, he was insanely adorable in his suit and the way he spoke in his Queens accent and thought of him speaking just now in his British accent... she'll hand it to him that he nailed the accent and the moves,

"... Spiderman homecoming, catch it in theatre on July 7th..."

The trailer finished and she chuckled at the thought of that adorable guy she just met fighting crime in a spider suit, suddenly her phone's message ringtone went off and she raised an eyebrow...a message at this time? All her friends were probably sleeping but she's still awake so she shouldn't be weirded out, it was a message by Spiderman himself, she grinned and opened the text

'Hey😊'

She thought for a second and responded

'Hi☺️'

She typed and send, bit down on her nails and waited for a reply.

Tom read her response and it was a 'Hi' with a smiling emoji but a smaller smiling one, what to write now? He then decided to be more chill and relax and ask about what she did after he left

Tom: 'So, how was dance after I left?'

A few seconds later a reply came

Y/N: 'Great, your comment made me feel better and I can say it went smoothly.'

Tom: 'That's amazing, glad to hear that it made you feel better.'

Y/N: 'Well...what about you, is the night going well for you.'

Tom chuckled at that and replied easily

Tom: 'Yeah well, Typical night as always, With the dog, Watching TV and snacking on stuff I shouldn't be snacking on late at night, you?'

Y/N: 'Well I guess almost same as you, except no dog, no chips, with ice packs on my legs and you're in it, but TV is a yeah.'

The two talked for hours through the night about everything, favourite dance, favourite food and movies, Tom talked about the time he was mistaken Robert Downey Juniors stunt double to be him and Y/N on the time she did a leap to far and jumped off stage landing on her teacher, they both had a great night just texting on the bed...it just felt like they were beside each other.

....

The day came, the big dance performance, it was two weeks after Tom met Y/N and now he's in front of a mirror dressed up for the performance, he was in a 2 piece grey checkered suit and inside he was a white turtle neck that was a perfect fit on his body, his hair was combed neatly and he looked at his entire self-thinking

'Am I overdressed?'

'Do I look like I'm trying too hard?'

He wondered but he really didn't want to show up being underdressed cause it'll look as if he didn't really care how he looked in front of her, he's been texting her every day since they've exchanged numbers and by now he was sure he had a crush on her but he really didn't have the guts to tell her and scare her off... And even if he did finally typed something a bit more flirty she would flirt back or be very smooth and play it off...did she not like him? He didn't know but whether she likes him or not he definitely wanted to see her performance...the first time he saw it charmed him off his feet and now here he stood pondering whether Y/N likes him or not and whether or not he's overdressed.

Tom looks back at the rose bouquet on the table wrapped in white with a red bow, inside writing a letter for Y/N to read and he sigh...will she realize how he felt and reject him, he didn't know but he was definitely giving them to her, he looked beside the Bouquet and saw his clock, '7:30' shit...the performance starts at 8:00 and he spent 30 minutes just looking at the same outfit, he grabbed the Bouquet and tickets then ran out of the door and hailed the nearest cab when he reached the side of the road, luckily he got one.

Y/N was already at the dance theatre at 3 to get ready, from early rehearsal to prepping the younger kids with their hair and makeup since they went before her to start the show, she made sure the music was right then at 5 she started getting ready, her makeup was just foundation, her eyebrows, some redx brown eyeshadow and gold on the lids and inner corner of the eye, a simple wing liner, mascara, light contour, blush and cherry red lipstick...she looked in the mirror and she has to admit she looked ethereal like, she had a tight low bun with golden pieces on it like leaves and gold flowers than on her head was a golden crown with a charm dangling in the centre of her head between her curtain fringe, her dress was all white with a sweetheart neckline and two arm bracelets that had white fabric attached with another arm bracelet below so it looks like two puffy sleeves on her arms, she wore a gorgeous white tutu that had golden chains and detailing on them and red gems and crystals attached on it, the detailing was similar to the pattern on her dress top and to finish off her outfit was her white Pointe shoes...like that she was ready to go on stage, but before she left her room her phone rang and she checked it...it was a message from Tom, she opened it and saw an adorable selfie of him on the front seat in the dance theatre and caption was

'Excited for the performance 😆!'

His Express was like the emoji he sent and it was so precious, she texted him back with a picture of her pointe shoes and wrote

'Well, you won't be disappointed.😬'

She puts her phone down and goes on stage... wondering if she could see Tom from where she'll perform.

The curtains drew open and there was a bunch of kids in dancing together...12 to be exact, 12 little girls dancing in sync to a beautiful song and Tom watched fascinated and after a few minutes they dispersed and went behind the curtain and another 12 older girls came out and joined hands as they were lined in a large circle, Tom later looked closer and saw Y/N, all the girls had the same dance but it seemed like Y/N part was more important...she danced better than all the girls he thought but of course didn't say and judging by the audience eyes he believe they thought the same since they paid more attention to her. The performance went on with the 12 girls on stage dancing then the set changed with more people coming in and Y/N stood in the middle of the stage while everyone else had a partner dancing around her, suddenly lights dimmed and only a source of light landed on her then on someone, a man dressed in all black came in the picture and walked to Y/N, everyone around them looked afraid of him except for the character Y/N played, he gave her his hand to dance and she accepted it, the two had a dance duet together with the light mostly on them with dark intense music playing, Y/N did a bunch of hard dangerous leaps, pointes and Pirouettes but she didn't flinch or stumble...she danced Beautifully.

Tom simply couldn't stop looking at her, the way she moved and the elegance she had...was marvellous, the ending of the performance was Y/N solo, it was the same dance Tom saw when he passed her door a week ago, exactly the same and he saw how everyone was just as enchanted by her dance...the white and gold backdrop and beautiful light shining on her...she looked like a goddess, she was literally shining like an Angel and Tom thought he liked her...no, he has fallen deep for her.

The end of the dance Y/N joined hands with the guy she danced and beside her was everyone she shared the stage with, they bowed as the crowd veered and Y/N looked around and spotted Tom in the front seat, one of the spectators that stood up to clap and her smile got wider and waved at him, he returned the wave and the curtains draw...he then went to the backstage and showed the guards the pass and they let him in, he passed by dancers and makeup artist, people who helped with the performance or was in the performance in general,saw him and started whispering,

'Is that Tom Holland?'

'Isn't that the guy that played Spiderman?'

'What is Tom Holland doing here.'

Tom didn't mind since he was used to it but he really couldn't find Y/N room and he asked one of the girls

"Hey..er do you know where I can find Y/N's room?"

She nodded without saying a thing like she has seen a ghost and pointed at it,

"Oh, thanks."

He thanked her and went off and he swore he heard her squeal and her friends were crowding around her asking her what he said or what happened, Tom got to her room and knocked on the door,

"Who is it?"

That was her voice

"Er...it's me, Tom."

There was a pause and the door opened and revealed Y/N, she had her bun removed but her crown was still on, she smiled and let him in

"Please come in, take a seat at the couch, sorry it's so messy."

She apologized and went to get a glass of water but Tom stopped her by tapping on her shoulder

"I- I ahem, I got these for you."

He handed the beautiful bouquet and Y/N looked surprised, her eyes glowed and she covered her mouth with one hand before removing them to hold the bouquet with both her hands

"Tom...t-these are..*Chuckle* these are beautiful, oh my gosh thank you I love them."

She hugged him and he was shocked but returned it gleefully, she puts the flowers on her vanity and took the letter out going to read it but Tom stopped her

"WAIT, er read that when you are alone please.."

Y/N grinned and raised an eyebrow and said

"Why? Did you write me a love confession?"

Tom didn't say anything but blush at that, Y/N laughed and said

"Just kidding, ok I'll read it when I get home but now, I need to get ready for the after party everyone will be there."

She goes behind a white privacy screen and starts changing and Tom just sat there looking around then he hears the dress fall to the ground and sees Y/N silhouette from the screen, she was definitely naked now and he looked away feeling embarrassed and like a perv...he shouldn't be gawking at her thought but his eyes wouldn't stop going back to look, every part of her body her curves and all can he seemed through her silhouette and damn was her body beautiful... she wore a two-piece from what he can tell, the top was long sleeve with and puffed out at her elbow then a puffy organza skirt, she came out and he saw the colour was Blue and Gold, it was simply breathtaking especially since it was on her, she removed her cherry red lipstick and has gloss on instead, puts her heels on and looks at Tom smiling,

"Let's go."

Tom gets up and puts his arm out for Y/N to hold on and she did, they walked out of the room as they go down the hallway of staff and dancers as they broke out in louder whispers but they didn't care, Y/N and Tom got into the Cab that was to bring them to the party and they left the dance theatre, they were going to come back after the party anyways.

....

When they arrived and entered the room Y/N was immediately greeted by her ex-judges, teachers, dance mates and everyone, it seemed like she was pretty well known in this room and people turn and see the Tom Holland with her and they ask for autographs and start asking why he's here and he just answers truthfully that he was here with Y/N as her friend... It felt a bit sour saying friend he thought.

The party was going well, a bit dancing, drinking, eating and mingling around and at one point Tom dragged Y/N to the dance floor as they dance to Lean on by Major Lazer and it was intense, at first Y/N was slightly stiff but once she got a hang of it she was pretty good and got in sync with Tom as they partied and danced another 3 or 4 songs before going to Y/N's best friend Yvonne to play never have I ever drink edition.

"Okay okay *Laughs* Never have I ever... leapt way too far off of the stage and onto a teacher."

Nobody drank and laughed at that, who on earth has done that they wondered and suddenly Y/N downed a shot and everyone roared of laughter.

"NO WAY!"

"GIRL NO, YOU DIDN'T."

"HOLY FUCK WHEN."

the comments came flooding in as they laughed their heads off and Y/N explained what happened in a very fast story and it was her turn to call the shots, she looks at Tom and smirk,

"Never have I ever... mistaken a celebrity for his Stunt double."

Everyone looked at each other and laugh... who's guilty this time and Tom embarrassed downed his drink, everyone lost it immediately and asked who it was and when he said Robert Downey Junior they started rolling on the floor, it was an insanely fun night and probably the best Tom had in a long time.

The party was ending soon with everyone just sitting around and talking or drinking so Y/N went out to get some fresh air and Tom followed, they walked around the large balcony and looked at the moon and they start talking about strange theories they have like how some humans are disguised as aliens and live among us or just some other weird stuff, suddenly Y/N tiredness kicked in her legs went weaker... dancing and not taking a rest can really turn your legs all jelly and her legs just stopped working and she fell on Tom's chest,

"So the thing is I swear I saw someone talking gibberi- woah!"

"Oh, hey! I got you."

He held her waist and her hands on his arms grabbing on for support, she looked down to her feet and saw her foot twisted slightly causing her to wince in pain,

"Ow...ow, damn these heels."

She complained and Tom laughed, finally she looked forward and made eye contact with Tom...they were just inches apart and she could feel his breath on her face, She felt her cheeks heat only slightly while Tom...was cherry red,

"Yo- you need to sit down."

He breaks the silence and Y/N agrees by nodding and mouthing a 'yeah', he helped her to the balcony ledge that was very broad so it was safe and she leaned on the statue on the ledge, Tom got down and check her foot and held it to get a closer look,

"You'll be fine, it's not that serious."

"Yeah... I've had days like these, just need some massaging and icing and I'll be good to go."

She said thinking about all the times she sprained and twisted her ankle...she has already lost count, Tom finally got up and was taller than her since she was sitting down, suddenly he laughed and Y/N looked at him confused,

"What's so funny?"

"Just the face you made like you're recalling all the time you hurt yourself and losing count of how many times it's happened."

He continues laughing and Y/N gives an angry pout and playfully smacks his arm but she almost lost balance almost falling off the ledge, luckily Tom was fast and grabbed her waist,

"Fuck, Y/N you need to be more careful."

"I jumped off a stage so you know... but still thanks."

Their eyes made contact again, Y/N looking up since sitting where she was made her short and Tom was grabbing her waist to make sure she doesn't fall off but now he can't seem to let go,

"Tom...why don't you have a girlfriend."

Y/N said in that same quiet and gentle tone that sounded like a whisper just for him...never leaving eye contact instead deepening it

"... You've asked me many questions but I've yet to ask you any...I'll answer you after you answer mine..."

Tom said in the same tone and Y/N kept quiet... But gave a look that said okay

"Why don't you have a boyfriend..."

He asked nervously hoping that didn't sound weird

"Because...no one understood that my life... isn't just for them...I love the stage...I love the pain of standing in those pointe shoes...I love ballet, but none of them understood that... None of them knew that being a performer I have divided priorities... They want me to pick but I can't... I'll never."

The silence sunk in...Tom sort of gets it, being a celebrity and trying to be just a normal person doing normal things wasn't easy... having a relationship was hard since they always want you to be around 24/7 but obviously Tom can't... cameras, premieres, they will always be around... He can never choose one over the other but for Y/N...he believed he'll give up acting to be with her,

"Now you...why don't you have a girlfriend..."

Y/N leaned in as their foreheads almost touch and so did Tom... helping close the distance,

"Cause...I haven't found the one..."

Y/N stopped moving forward and averted eye contact by looking down,

"Until now."

Tom finished and leaned closer, Y/N looked into his eyes again and she knew she shouldn't kiss him... not now not ever...she knew she didn't want to lose another relationship...she was used to it not working out but with Tom...she didn't want to lose it at all but he was too magnetic... pulling her into his charm, this moment this very moment...she fell for him knowing how she couldn't...

The distance closed between them and their lips brushed across each other before it collided...it felt like a firework started in their chest feeling a spark between them the moment touched, it was a gentle and simple kiss that was moving without a second of hesitation or awkward pauses... it was perfect, his lips fit perfectly on hers as he pulled her closer and her hand brushed across his face pulling him closer...their lips in sync as they kissed under the Moonlight...

The kiss ended and their foreheads were on each other, Y/N hands on Tom's chest feeling his heartbeat and Tom's hand on her waist whilst the other was on the back of her neck...it must have slid up from her back as he tried to pull her closer...

"We shouldn't do this..."

Y/N said quietly,

"Why not..."

Tom stepped closer didn't look at him...so many reasons why they can't be together...and not one she can say...or is capable of saying...she couldn't say a word, is she can freeze him she would want to stay in this moment forever... never has she ever felt so much for a man like Tom or felt such energy immersed from her when kissing someone...

She looks at him in the eye and stares at it like she was looking at the universe for the first time and shuts them close gently... This may be the last time she'll allow herself this close to him so she had to take in the moment.

#tom holland #tom holland x reader #tom holland x you #tom holland x y/n #tom holland fanfiction #fanfic #fanfiction

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