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#(sort of. They say its connected so)
tapeworrmart · 1 year
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Marked 💋🔪
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turtletoria · 1 year
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wordbat and captain robin... and also dr joker brains ?!!?!
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windydrawallday · 2 months
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Long-PSA-short of sorts that's more a vent: I was always aware my behavior and way of expressing myself online can surprise many people, especially if they are not used to someone who uses the writing medium as a playful form to tell emotions in a very descriptive way as I do. I'm quite affectionate with words, yes. And I always beg people I hang with personally to let me know if some of that bothers them, curtly of course. So far there have been few instances of individuals confusing those signals with ulterior means, things I assure you there's nothing more than me being friendly and supportive.
Imagine idk an excited dog seeing its owner haha
Until the past week, I found myself being tackled by something that made me almost knock everything aside because it made me realize that probably I'm a walking trigger/squick inducer with even the way I wield words like "love" and "friendship".
Almost...
I'm pretty tolerant of whatever way people conduct themselves in this life, the only moment I flinch is when an individual assumes from my default behavior and presentation that I want to impose my way of life... And nopes.
This is simply how and who I am. Nothing more, nothing less. I don't search for conflict but for understanding. My language for expressing marvel and reflections is like this, never to make the other feel awkward or attacked.
So, it upset me knowing that by wielding this forever welcoming and lovable disposition, I can be something to fear and even despite... to some people.
But, you know? That means that my "love" and "friendship" lifestyle are not made for you, no reason to come back to me and point at it. Just keep walking if you have only rage and rejection to give as a reply to my point of view. Because by wielding rage and rejection, what you only do is burn bridges. To create conflict and assume imaginary antagonistic scenarios where there's nothing of that at all.
You can't create the world you wish to live in by burning bridges.
It took me a lot too to forge who I am right now. I even keep learning and chiseling through traumas and mistakes—kindness and patience taught me more than rage and rejection. And "love" and "friendship" are the bricks I chose to build those bridges. I know everyone else uses different concepts but in the end, we all build bridges. By creating bridges and inviting others to do the same, I expand not only my world, but the other's too!
Isn't that better than demanding to be this or that through a black/white flag of rage and rejection? I think so. And I understand perfectly we sometimes need to be blunt when marking our boundaries. Still, never justifies treating the other bad.
And if some of you find "fake" or distasteful the way I wear this flag of "love" and "friendship" I'm sorry: this place will never be safe for you then. The exit door is always open. Go ahead.
I hope you find your place and flags out there too, but don't forget that to do that you need to build bridges. If you don't want to call it "friendship" call it "glue" or whatever makes you comfortable, but don't kick people like me who fought with claws and teeth to reclaim those words and feelings.
Fight your fight by being a good example, not a bad experience that makes someone never want to deal with something like this again in their life.
"Any color you like, (in the end) they're all blue."
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moonbeam-fox · 3 months
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Once I started treating small talk as a bid for connection and stopped treating it as some sort of tedious social expectation, life got a lot easier for me.
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marsixm · 4 months
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im trying to wrap my head around why i dont get enthusiastic about reddit style fiction (not a dig but a descriptor) like scp and shit like that, bc its not that i can’t enjoy them but i think its like… when stuff is framed as if it were real, but its fiction, its like, well KNOWING its fiction eliminates a huge element of the intrigue, but also, crucially, i like character-driven stories, or at least stories WITH characters. but i also like it when things are interesting for said characters to experience, like, i want the ghosts and monsters and conspiracies but i want the characters to be character-ing, yknow? not that i dont enjoy slice of life and… what would u call the first thing, non-character specific horror? idk? but i prefer when its both. its like i love kirk and spock but also i do enjoy watching them Experience Situations when i watch star trek. i enjoy the idea of spooky national forest monsters that arent real but experiencing it alongside a character would be better, and i want more trans and gay characters whose lives are clearly trans and gay but i want a plotline to unfold too
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thinking about hamilton and burr together but not in a kissing way but in a you are so different on surface but are made of the same core way. they have the same sort of wants and hurt but they project it in such different ways.
#two people put together like that would either love each other with their entire hearts or would kill each other.#maybe both#alex and henry from rwrb are kind of examples from this.#look cmq made alex too similar to hamilton and henry too similar to burr for me to not connect the dots.#but while their character traits put them lethally against each other in the play in the book its.. different.#i can talk about alex more since both in the book and play we see alexander more (both such fucking main characters)#i think alex from rwrb had a comparatively better foundation in childhood than hamilton. he's less scrappy than hamilton#he still does things like be lonely and drown himself in his work etc etc you all saw the parallels#but but but he sort of has room for love in his heart in a way hamilton doesnt. maybe he did with laurens because its said that he#never really opened up the same after he died. makes me think that was pretty serious. but its not in the play so im not going too much#into it. alex isn't as suspicious and survivalistic as hamilton. if hamilton saw henry he would've never put him before his work#but alex does. from his side i think that's what makes the difference.#like how he says to henry in the fight scene that they're not really very different people?? remember that#there's waaay too many coincidences i am ready to believe cmq wrote rwrb as a very very sneaky adaptation of hamiltons life#the slightest hint from them and i would believe it. this is a conspiracy theory i can get behind#rwrb#red white and royal blue#hamilton#hmm i been having thoughts about this for the past 2 hours#maybe this stem thing was a mistake maybe i should've taken literature. i like what i do though
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extravalgant · 1 year
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Well done, my champion, my hero, my... dare i say it? My Scion. 
started thinkin about lemuria again and before i knew it i was 4+ hours deep into this painting of calamity . crazy stuff
IM NOT THERE YET ON MY STORM (camera pan to me dead in karamelle) but that wont stop me from getting the story ELSEWHERE... the monitoring stations with the old one always interested me . love how he called us his scion i think thats very fucked up possessive of him
anyways heres one more lil doodle
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#wizard101#w101#lemuria spoilers#HOW DO I... EXPLAIN THIS#this is a lie i would love to explain all my fucked up and projected thinking#I LOVE THAT LITTLE PIECE OF DIALOGUE....#and its so funny to imagine this as calamity in this situation#because as far as she knows the arcanum and ravenwood let her kill anyone she pleased#either that or she realized early on that she had 'permission to kill' that anyone else didnt have#so later on down the line she starts toeing the line of a 'good' and 'bad' person so when dasein comes along shes like ur telling me#i gotta deal with and sort out my own moral compass ??? AND TEACH IT TO THIS GUY???#guy (gender neutral)#but like... MY SCION . what did u mean by that. AND ITS CAPITALIZED SO ITS IMPORTANT#whether or not he knew it was us (but i think he did know it was us) when we saw each other on the summit its like . things would have been#so different if he didnt get swallowed and thats the crazy part#MY CHAMPION.. MY HERO... like objectively speaking those are very much positive/good aligned but coming from that tv#i was like u are trying to mold us (the wizard) into EVIL!!! MAYBE . maybe#also its sooo juicy how we will never know if the old one actually had a change of heart bc hes dead . like LOST CONNECTIONS...#some will say yes and canon supports that i guess w the guilt line but at the same time im like . he was way too flippant with the lives of#these inhibitants for me to believe that he felt guilt at the last moment like what CHANGED...#anyways . i like to think that he was still putting up a front and had an ego to assume nothing bad would happen to him#bc yknow he 'knew everything'#and then he ends up getting absorbed and its like . a#I TALK SO MUCH IN THESE TAGS... kissie for whoever reads this mwah#my art#also this was like my first time doing both perspective AND lighting and i was working with 4 different light sources#please . have mercy on me#edit: ok apparently he didnt know who the scion would b in lemuria but ig he knew it might have been us in karamelle . idk! idk
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arolesbianism · 14 days
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Some stuff I've drawn semi recently
#keese draws#oc art#oc#ocs#furry#furry oc#furry art#Ive been going thru it recently but Ill survive#on the bright side the pet sitting job for my aunt is coming up soon#so Ill have a house to myself for a bit at least#Im probably still gonna be fairly offline for the foreseeable future unless I somehow manage to fix my sleep schedule anytime soon#not to say I will be on any sorta complete hiatus or anything just that Im not getting any more active most likely#not that I think anyone rly cares at this point since its been the norm for a while now but yknow#Ill still be around to answer asks and stuff just dont freak out if I take a lil bit to see it 👍#anyways enough of being a downer Im actually pretty happy with these even if theyre mostly just doodles#also I havent posted any art of these guys in a While but say hi to them while you can cause theyre back into the void of my brain now#first is keese (the oc™) second is toon and third is clyve#all from different stories but toon and clyve are both from the magic cat universe#their paths never meet tho the closest connection they have has to go through like 4 characters first#you can also tell theyre from different stories because one is anthro and the other isnt lol#generally speaking I consider anthro designs slightly more canon but both are canon depending on the story#not in a shapeshifting way just in a me being an inconsistent bitch sorta way#but yeah keese the oc is much older than either of those two I just dont talk abt them or their story ever#but hey if any of yall remember suckerz those two are besties#suckerz is sort of younger than the other two and sort of much older than all three#shes a sort of updated version of a reallyyyy old sona sort of character I had in like 6th grade I think#back during my lilo and stitch experiment oc era where I had one that was music themed#I also had a digimon variant of her she was called like beatramon or smth like that#she was basically a hypothetical music mascot and shes kind of still that tbh#if I ever get enough into making music that I start posting shit it will be my music mascot
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4arconinoma · 8 months
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By the way Trish was hoping the entire time to hear some sort of comfort from Bruno and felt upset by his cold and detached demeanor because he's the only person who served as some sort of familial figure and offered her any amount kindness or protection And he did want to say those things to her and when he finally DID offer words of comfort it wasn't ACTUALLY Trish and he only Thought it was Trish and she never got to hear him say those things to her and he has no idea he never got to tell her. Just so you know
#jjba#txt#When i was rewatching Vento Aureo and realized this it made my stomach drop#So you will have to know too#im so normal about this im so normal#Listen i hate mommy bruno characterization like i really really do but#Not only does this disprove it (He shows a cold demeanor to the gang members to try and avoid attachment and provide stability in times of#emotional desperation and not some sort of motherly figure like the fandom tries to say he is instead of a MAFIA GANG LEADER)#I also do think the one familial sort of attachment present is him and Trish. This is not the mom thing#Its just quite literally she has no one else to rely on. The elevator scene she was so scared of meeting a father who's intentions she does#t even know And Bruno is so young but he is the only adult figure she can rely on there. Perhaps its not parental but familial in other way#Either way hes the only person that can support her in that situation and shes frustrated that hes acting cold#But the thing is he has to act cold because he has to keep it together and i bet he didnt want her to become attached to him at first in th#t way PROBABLY mirroring his childhood as well he wanted to keep her away from this sort of lifestyle and not have her be associated with#him or the gang so that she could live a safe life#But i imagine he realized at some point that she has no one else BUT WHEN HE FINALLY TOLD 'HER' THINGS TO MAKE HER FEEL BETTER#IT WASN'T HER HE THOUGHT IT WAS BUT IT WASN'T AND THEY'RE NOT GOING TO SEE EACH OTHER AGAIN#This connection never got to grow They don't know this about the other. He never got to say these things and she never got to either#im so sad Im so sad#So like i said this is the only familial thing I think Bruno has going on.#I see Bruno as more of a cool uncle or brother though. I cant see him as a parent. He is so young. Everyone forgets this#But either way he would be the only caretaker that she has. But they didnt get to have that chance#Its just heartbreaking#Im so sad#YOUVE HAD NOTHING BUT HORRIBLE THINGS HAPPEN TO YOU. BUT YOU STILL HAVE A CHANCE TO ENJOY A NEW LIFE. HEAD IN HANDS
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spotsupstuff · 9 months
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Annoying bio nerd back at it again sorry
But do ancients have a spine? Because that is a very specific structure that anemones do not have irl. I can't see any other way for them to support walking upright than to have some sort of back stick
yeah man they do it's pretty blatantly displayed too
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girlwithfish · 9 days
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also he asked a kinda personal question and i was talking abt it but felt very embarrassed and it also took me a long time to articulate when I cld have said it more succinctly w less pauses and such...felt kind of embarrassed after bc im like why am I not normal abt anything. but idk a little vulnerability is good I suppose. 😕
#he asked if i feel any connection to my chinese heritage#and then i gave some complicated nonsensical answer abt feeling disconnected and alienated etc#Which was weird to talk abt out loud bc i realize i never really have talked abt it out loud much to anyone#or maybe ever#so its weird to say out loud#like theres always gonna be some gap or emptiness etc#And i didnt rly articulate it that well but i was thinjing abt it now but i also dont like feeling#like a spectacle ? i guess#Even if ppl dont intend to make u feel that way but i really dislike ppl/strangers or ppl who i dont know well butting in to my personal#life#or like being asked why i dont look like my parents as a kid or ppl inquiring abt my adoption#even tho ik its 'innocent' curiosity it def makes me feel like a spectacle of some sort#and tied w feeling alienated and even mkre like a spectacle esp when i worked in retail and wld encounter a lot of ppl and would get#asked alll the time where am i from its very annoying and i#think i dont like the unwanted attention and also again ppl idk getting into my business LOL#And then theres also the shame that comes w being around or encountering other chinese ppl or older chinese ppl and#having ro explain i dont speak the language or i dont have chinese parents#its like i would rather not have to talk abt a personal aspect of my life to strangers at all tbh. idk if thats odd#and esp when my personal experiences as an adopter kinda get talked over by my parents or other ppl idk#idkkk#i dont think he rly knew what to say hah and he said it seemed like a sensitive subjwct bc i spent like ten minutes(jk) tryig to articulate#But like ofc i like being chinese but ik im not chinese in the same way as others may be#Even tho i am. but yk what i mean#but he was rubbing my leg affectionately while i talked and listened even tho i was taking like 8 minutes to answer a simple question#Idk
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bmpmp3 · 9 days
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I NEEED to go back to making art that makes it ABUNDANTLY clear that theres something wrong with my brain BUT NOT in a cool or stylishly interesting way. i need to do it in a way that makes people say "hm." and walk away
#sowwy ive been kinda going through it in my fine arts major rn can u tell HJKSDHKFd#ive been feeling like. scared. and paralyzed by marketability and branding.#i cant stop thinking about how other people will see my art. but not like in a good way#when i was younger i thought about it in a good way. like hee hee hoo hoo the act of looking connected us hee hee#but rn i keep thinking about it in like this wretched like consumer product mindset? ouhhghhhhh el problema es el capitalismo#and like maybe this works for some people. to think like this. to make art like this. its what my professors push me towards#not intentionally. they dont say it out loud at least. im not sure if they know or not some of the irony#my professors are nice and pretty smart and talented and i like em. but sometimes i wonder like. the push for us as students to make like#marketable 'avant garde'? stuff thats safe but pretending to be weird and out there#i dont mean to sound pretentious. in general i play it too safe myself (spent too much time as an edgy 10 year old with my#parents freaking out over my shoulder because they think the fact that i drew an anime character frowning means something serious LOL)#but i dunno man. my least interesting art with the least amount of care thought or effort always gets so much more attention in school#nowhere else oddly. online? people like my more passionate but seemingly frivolous art (oc art etc. not frivolous to me but yknow how it is#same with irl artists and other industry people outside my school. whats going on in my school LOL#i know from experience i cant push myself into a supposedly marketable brand. if i try to make something sell it will not.#i dont know why. maybe theres an invisible essence buyers can tell when i didnt care jkfsldjdfrds#but my teachers LOOOOVE the stuff i put no passion in its so bizarre orz but i gotta relearn how to ignore half of their advice#i used to be better at it. but i also only used to ignore like a quarter of their advice. maybe i need to amp up how much im ignoring#that sounds mean. they have plenty of good advice. but also plenty of advice thats clouded by their own biases#and i gotta relearn how to sort out this stuff again. i forget every few months for some reason#you know i always think ouuhhhhh i act so neurotypical ouhhhhhhhhh im outgoing i talk to strangers all the time i seem confident#im so masked IM SO MASKED but then i go a couple weeks where every conversation i have has people looking at me like#i have two heads and neither of them are speaking their language. and then i descend into madness like this HJKLDSHJDS#i'll be fine i'll figure it out. i need to stop trying to get a good grade in being a 'cutting edge' conventional artist <3#i need to just. draw my cartoon characters in peace 😔😔😔
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undyinglantern · 22 days
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when you’re so shit at Spanish that it literally doesn’t even occur to you how to pronounce this word until looking at the wiki 👍🏼
#though the most I’m familiar with the word when it comes to starting a car [insert all the times ive heard family say they have to#'arrancar el carro']. and like I know nothing about cars so bare with me in the way I’m gonna explain this but#when the engine won’t start so you open the hood and connect wires from the car that won’t start to one that works fine#anyways also very stupid of me considering I HAVE heard the term espada in terms of this series before#now I’m curious how arrancar is gonna be pronounced once I get that far#bc I was trying to guess and in my head I kept going Aron-kur(?)#but like knowing how 2000s anime pronounce jp works I wonder if they’ll butcher esp one too#are they gonna say ah-rahn-kar properly? cmon there’s a half Mexican guy in the series you can do this#<-(Falsely optimistic)#BUT ALSO IN MY DEFENSE i had never actually heard the word sword (espada) irl growing up#but my understanding of spanish is all sorts of fucked up tbh#like the first time i had champurrado i freaked out wtf i was getting this thick chocolate drink and not a hard giant cookie (champurrada)#my parents never said chancla they said chancleta#i had no idea a chicote was a whip until i looked it up later in life. i thought it was a belt which just happened to be made of leather..#saying as someone whos parents didnt threaten them with a belt or sandals but A FUCKING WHIP. APPARENTLY.#papote instead of pajilla (later found out i was mispronouncing even that my whole life bc its actually pOpote)#and pelo colocho instead of chino are the other 2 big commonly spoken differences
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delyth88 · 1 year
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Jacinda just resigned.
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milfygerard · 2 years
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this is something ive seen a few times on my dash and i dont think ppl know this so i just wanna say that while its fun to joke about or even just discuss frank songs being about gerard a lot of the ones i see brought up frank has said are about like. his struggles with addiction (medicine square garden, veins veins veins) or complicated family situations (veins again, fantastic bastards tho not confirmed to be abt frank at all) idk i just want ppl who maybe didnt known to like know that
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holographicbutch · 3 months
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One thing about travis willingham is he KNOWS he would never resist the allure of a cursed amulet. And I respect that
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