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#6b spec
tawaifeddiediaz · 1 year
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when it rains (it pours)
this is a spec fic, so spoilers for 6b ahead!
Pairing: Evan “Buck” Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Rating: T
Chapter: 1/1
Word Count: 4,101 words
Snippet:
Ten days after Buck flat-lines on a stretcher in the pouring rain, Eddie’s allowed to take him home.
His skin feels stretched tight over his bones, a kinetic energy vibrating through his bones, twitching through his fingers as he watches Buck clumsily pull on a hoodie. Eddie watches him like a hawk, unable to keep him out of his sights for longer than he has to.
He hadn’t had to fight very hard to get Buck back to his place instead of anyone else’s, the consensus being that he wasn’t going home alone. There had been something knowing in Bobby’s expression as he’d explained that Buck would be most comfortable in the Diaz home, but something even more incriminating as he’d looked at Eddie — as if he knew the impulse to keep Buck as close as possible, the reasons behind it.
Maybe it’s because he had to listen to the God-awful silence that accompanied his partner’s heart stopping, or because he watched Buck dangle from a ladder while desperately trying to hide his own injuries so no one would pay attention to him over the one who needed it most, or because, or because—
[Read on AO3]
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chaosandwolves · 1 year
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I love how we all decided that Eddie is ready to be with Buck but also knows that Buck isn't quite there yet
I love that through the last seasons it shifted from...
oh Buck is into Eddie and knows but doesn't wanna make a move cause what if he destroys what they have and he thinks that Eddie is straight anyway
to
Actually it's Eddie who knows first. Cause he's come so far in his healing that he not only understands but also accepts these feelings. But he also knows that Buck is not ready yet, that Buck first has to sort himself out and Eddie's totally content to just be there and support him.
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toughpaperround · 1 year
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Poker nights - a 911 Rec List (1/3)
SPOILER ALERT for season 6 episode 13, "Mixed Feelings"
All because a person dropped a set photo, there are fics:
On tumblr, "they don't call it texas hold'em for nothing" by @ghosthunterbuck (unrated, 1.6k) in which Eddie’s an idiot, except when he's not
"Texas Hold 'Em" by Alitomy | @alit0my (G, 4k) in which Buck and Eddie have to play a very lucrative game, but there's a catch
"raise" by withoutthetiger | @rewritetheending (E, 6.5k) where we can read the five ways their poker night could end and the one way it does
"too busy being yours to fall for somebody new" by youdrewstarsaroundmyscars118 (G, 2k) in which an undercover mission unleashes some new sensations for Eddie
And even some gorgeous fanart from @like-the-rest-of-la
Finally a BONUS earlier fic (so, not based on the image), in which Buck and Eddie play "Strip Poker" by Veronae (G, 1.6k)
See also part 2, 3, or check out a 911 masterlist of themed rec lists
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So, just for schedule-wise, I'm hoping to have lightning!fic ready by Saturday, in preparation for Monday. It's been really fun to write and I gave myself an excuse to write a scene I've been REALLY wanting to for the Drama of It All, but had no reason to. Here's a clipboard snippet, after the lighthearted scene with socks and clipboards, it gets dramatic real fast 💖
“—I’m just saying, I’m starting to not be able to feel my feet.” Buck is saying. “Maybe we should start packing extra socks in the rig for moments like this. We would all benefit.”
“Yeah, why don’t you just write that on your clipboard I know you always have hidden under your seat.” Hen offers, clearly unimpressed but more than amused. “I don’t know why you bother to hide it, we all know it’s there.”
Buck glowers at her, eyes narrowing. Hen returns the gaze and after five seconds of unrelenting eye contact, Buck crumbles in the way they all expect. He lets out a dramatic sigh and reaches underneath his seat, unearthing a clipboard. Eddie was certain he got rid of them all, so it’s unnerving that Hen knew before he did, but that really was the way things were these days. He tells himself he isn’t jealous, but it’s been a while since Eddie wasn’t able to immediately read everything from a single expression from Buck, and he decidedly does not care for that shit at all.
“We all benefit from dry socks.” Buck mumbles just on the funny side of petulance, Eddie leaning over to see him quickly write ‘extra socks in rig’ in his chicken scrawl that typically requires a symbologist to decipher. He smirks at other notes, which include ‘snack box 4 chim’ and ‘book 4 kids’ among other things. Eddie knows his face is twisted into something almost painfully fond – something Chris has ceremoniously decided to call his ‘lame dad heart eyes,’ oh how Eddie loves this transition to teenage behavior – but it’s the quiet moments like this where Eddie lets himself feel things that he doesn’t want to put a name to.
It isn’t until he notices Hen sitting across from him in the rig, a knowing smirk growing on her face in a way that feels like one of those lesbian goddess of knowledge things that she always jokes about, but Eddie isn’t sure it’s even a joke anymore. There’s something about the way that it’s coming from Hen, a private moment that she’s allowing him to feel safe when he isn’t sure his own head is, like she is saying I get it without mortifyingly saying the words out loud. Eddie guesses if anyone would get it, it would be her, but it still doesn’t mean that he’s quite ready for that realization.
“I thought I took all your clipboards away.” Eddie chides when he can’t bare to keep eye contact with Hen any longer. “You’re a menace to society with them.”
“He’s a menace to society when he steps out of his apartment.” Chimney snorts. “The greater city of L.A. is actively in danger when you get a clipboard.”
Buck gives them all an unimpressed look. “You may have taken the clipboards you know about, but I am a man of means, as Hen puts it. I can buy socks and clipboards.”
“Wow, socks and clipboards, you’re really ballin’ out of control.”
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possibly controversial opinion but i don’t necessarily want buddie together by the season finale
nah instead i want buddie canon, i.e. reveal of feelings to the audience but not yet to each other
like… season finale, a newly married chim is encouraging eddie to keep getting out there and then he says something like ‘i already know what i want’
camera cut to buck, then back again and chimney’s like ‘ohhh i get it now’ and just pats him on the back and doesn’t say anything else, cause buck’s crush on eddie is bigger than the sun
then boom season finale ends, hiatus for however many months it is
like can you imagine the chaos?? everyone would lose their minds
i dunno, i’m still gonna be ecstatic if buddie gets together by 6x18, but this is my dream, my vision if you like
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loserdiaz · 1 year
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i've seen a lot of ppl talking about buck and eddie both getting knocked out during the storm and eddie wakes up relatively quickly in the hospital and the firefam's there and he sees that buck is missing and is like "oh and buck is with chris right? where is he?" and the others just look at each other not knowing how to tell him that buck's in a coma and i just—
can you just imagine tho, eddie in that hospital bed and he can't get up and even when he tries bobby and chim and hen are there to stop him and no one would tell him really what the hell happened except that buck is in a fucking coma and all they can do is wait.
and eddie just wants to see him, make sure he's alive and that he still exists bc most days buck feels like a pipe dream, something too good to be true and eddie's losing his mind.
and then—
it's late at night and his hospital room is so quiet, hen is in a chair next to his bed and she's sleeping and eddie loves her but all he can think about is that usually is another person who sits next to eddie's bed when he's hurt, another person who holds his hand and reassures him he'll take care of chris while eddie can't.
the tv is a soft, barely there background noise as it casts a dim light over the room, but when he looks up it's the news are playing back what happened earlier and he sees the moment the lightning strikes, sees the moment eddie himself almost falls... sees buck falling from the ladder truck and hitting his head against the side—
"buck" he gasps without even realizing, the name falling from his lips like a plea, like a prayer begging to be heard.
"buck." eddie chokes out as his mind replays the fall in slow motion.
eddie was supposed to have buck's back. eddie was supposed to save him.
hen wakes up and eddie quickly realizes he's hyperventilating, struggling to take a deep breath and tears are streaming down his face with no way to stop them.
he's having a panic attack. he hasn't had one of those in a long time, eddie thinks almost absentmindedly.
"eddie hey, it's okay." hen redts a hand on his shoulder and tries to calm him down but it doesn't feel right— her hand is too heavy on eddie's shoulder, and it's not the right side. It's too soft, too—
It's no buck's.
"i need to see him." he manages to blurt out the in between gasps. "hen, let me see him. please." he begs and his voice is shaky and breaking by the last word. it sounds pathetic and desperate even to his own ears but eddie can't bring himself to care at that moment.
his heart is beating too fast, unforgiving against his ribcage, his hands are trembling and eddie—
he just needs to see him.
it takes a while and the nurses are definitely not happy with himself— once again, eddie doesn't have it in him to care.
especially when he's put in a wheelchair (he doesn't need it but he's picking his battles carefully right now) and taken to see buck.
his hospital room is a lot like eddie's but maddie is sprawled on the chair next to the bef, with red puffy eyes and hair a mess.
she looks exactly like how eddie feels inside, if he's being honest, and for a moment he feels a kind of weird keenship to her.
they both would do anything for buck. they both hate to see buck hurt.
"i'll give you some time with him." she smiles tiredly and then she's living the room along with hen and the nurse who wheeled him in.
eddie swallows hard and reaches out for buck, his hand immediately resting against buck's...
buck's hand is cold to the touch, when usually it would be warm.
it's still, when usually it would be squeezing eddie's right back.
it's pale and small against the sheets and eddie feels like he might throw up.
"please wake up." he whispers, but in the quiet of the room it sounds loud and oh so desperate. "please don't leave me."
and eddie— there's so many words he needs, wants to say. so many things he needs to get out, so many things he needs buck to hear...
but for now they stay lodge inside his chest.
for now, he keeps them to himself but he hopes he'll have the chance to say them out loud someday.
he hopes buck will want to hear them.
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bucktommys · 1 year
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and my heart beats
buck/eddie | 27k+ | ao3
Christopher grows up. Eddie plants a garden.
It’s Chimney, who brings it up first.
“At this point I don’t think I know how to do anything except be a dad,” he says, with a laugh, and it’s not the point of the conversation, fatherhood, only that Buck said that he’s been thinking about signing up for a sport at the local rec centre and if anyone would be willing to double up in pickleball with him, and Bobby said he and Athena already played tennis, and Hen said she didn’t believe in racket sports, and Chimney said, I would, but at this point I don’t think I know how do anything except be a dad, and Eddie:
Eddie stands at the kitchen, with his hands tight around a scalding cup of coffee, wearing the BEST DAD socks Carla and Christopher got him for Christmas, while Christopher goes to the park with his friends after school for the first time and then gets the bus home by himself and feeling weirdly, unexpectedly, unstitched by it all.
read on ao3!
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extasiswings · 1 year
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out of things unsaid
No one should be surprised by this...have some spec fic for 6x10, my beloved. 
When Eddie was a kid, his abuela kept a big novelty clock on the wall in her living room.  Every time it chimed the hour, a door would open and little miniature figures would slide out for different scenes.  It wasn’t quiet the rest of the time either—if you were in the room, you could hear it tick, tick, tick every second down.  The figures used to freak him out a little, but the noise the rest of the time, that steady tick in the background, was soothing somehow.  A reminder that time always kept moving forward.  And if time could keep moving, then no matter what happened, Eddie could too.
The clock fell off the wall the day his abuelo died and shattered when it hit the ground.  It wasn’t replaced.  The next time Eddie was in that room, the thing he noticed most was the silence.  It left the space feeling…frozen.  Suffused with absence.  Foreign and cold and wrong.  Maybe time kept moving, but at least in that room it never felt like it again.  
His abuela moved to LA after that.  Sold the house full of memories that were colored over with a kaleidoscope of grief and growing stale.  Put a new clock on the wall of her new house.  A quieter one.  And time started again.  But not the same as before.
Never the same as before.
It’s funny, the things you think of when your world falls apart.  Because Buck gets struck by lightning and thrown off the ladder, is hanging in the air like a ragdoll at the end of his line, and despite not having remembered the thing in years, Eddie thinks about that damn novelty clock.
Tick.
Tick.
Tick.
Eddie moves without thinking, just feeling, running on pure instinct.  His throat is raw from a scream that he doesn’t remember letting out, and his hands grip the ladder—
He’s blasted off by another electric shock and lands hard on his back, his ears ringing.  But he still hears the ticking of the clock, the old memory echoing in the back of his mind.
Tick.
Tick.
Tick.
He scrambles to his feet and takes a step towards the ladder again, only for hands to grab the back of his turnout.  Eddie tries to pull away, but the grip holds fast.    
“I need to—”
“That thing is a lightning rod,” Bobby interrupts, tugging Eddie around to face him.  “You just experienced it yourself.  I can’t let you go up there.”
“Cap—”  Eddie’s voice cracks.  A year ago, that might have bothered him.  Because a year ago, he never let anything get to him on calls.  A year ago, he knew how to shut down and get to work, to stay focused and keep out all the noise.  A year ago, he knew how not to show when he was breaking.  
But now—
Now he feels everything.  Too much to keep inside.  Too much to ignore or push through.  He’s shaking, and he doesn’t think it has anything to do with the electricity that just zapped him.  
“You have to,” Eddie replies.  “I can’t—we can’t just leave him up there!”
The weight of responsibility is etched into every line of Bobby’s face.  “We won’t, but we need a plan—”
“We don’t have time!” His voice cracks again, and Bobby’s eyes close, but his grip still doesn’t loosen.  
Tick.
Tick.
Tick.
Eight minutes.  If Buck’s heart stopped when he got hit—which seems likely since he isn’t moving—he has about eight minutes without CPR.  Brain damage can happen after five.  
Sometimes Eddie wishes he wasn’t a medic.  Because then he wouldn’t have to know things like that.  He could be blissfully ignorant instead of counting every single tick of the clock in his head.
Tick.
Tick.
“Bobby.”  Not Cap.  And Eddie doesn’t care that he’s flaying himself open with a single word, shining a spotlight on every feeling, every wish, every desire that he’s been trying not to look at himself, let alone share with anyone else.  He feels like an animal caught in a trap, wriggling and desperate and terrified out of his head.  He feels like he’s been shot again—no, worse than when he was shot, because at least then it was only him, at least then dying was the worst thing that could happen to him.
Eddie doesn’t know what’s going to happen when the clock stops this time, but that moment is looming ever closer, threatening to swallow him up in a frozen, silent wasteland, and he can’t—
Tick.
There’s a shout from behind them, and Eddie is finally able to rip away from Bobby’s hands.  When he whirls around, Hen is halfway up the ladder to Buck. 
Eddie holds his breath as he watches her climb each rung.  And he listens to the ticking of the clock.  
Four minutes, five, five and a half—
Tick.
Tick.
Tick.
She’s on the ground by the time his count hits six, and Eddie knows he should let her do her job, let anyone else do it, but she doesn’t argue when he helps her get Buck’s terrifyingly still form on a board.  She doesn’t say a word when he rips open Buck’s shirt and presses his palms to Buck’s chest to confirm what he already knew.
Nothing.
In his mind, Eddie sees the clock crashing to the floor.
“No.”  It slips out as his own heart picks up double-time.  “No, you don’t get to do this.  You don’t—”
He doesn’t notice the look Hen and Chim exchange over his shoulder, or Bobby stepping up beside him, can’t be bothered to even think about what he’s giving away right now.  He fits his hands together as Chim switches places with Hen and presses them to Buck’s chest, starting compressions.
Time seems suspended between them all.
They get Buck into the ambulance.
They shock him with the portable defibrillator.  Once, twice—
The drone of the heart monitor replaces the silence of the stopped clock in Eddie’s head.  And just when he thinks that might be worse—
Beep.
Tick.
Time starts again.
And Eddie’s legs give out from under him as he lets Chim gently push him aside.  
His hands are still shaking when they arrive at the hospital, when Buck is wheeled through the ER doors.  He thinks his whole body might be.
“He didn’t wake up,” he croaks out finally, giving voice to what neither of them were willing to think about while in the ambulance.
“We got his heart started,” Chim replies.  “He’s alive.”
“Yeah…but he didn’t wake up.”
Tick.
Tick.
Tick.
Chim blows out a long, slow breath.
“He will.”
“He was down for so long—”
“Eddie.”  Chim grabs Eddie’s shoulder as he sways, a wave of dizziness crashing into him.  “Buck will wake up, okay?  We just have to give him some time.”
Time.  
Sure.
Chim tips his head, eyes narrowing as he looks at Eddie carefully.  “Are you okay? Physically, that is.  You got shocked pretty good back there too—you should get checked out.”
“I’m fine, I’m—”  Another wave of dizziness, and Eddie’s head spins, black creeping in at the edges of his vision.
“I need some help over here!” He hears Chim shout, and then he’s falling, fading, slipping away.
Somewhere, a clock ticks on.
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shortsighted-owl · 1 year
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New Fic: Electrostatic Attraction
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Chapter One: Charge Seperation (8.3 k)
-
In front of him Hen shifts, her body blocking his view of the ladder rising into the dark sky. Of the rain-slick figure of his captain charging hand over fist to the top of the rungs. Three points of contact be damned.
Her eyes, Eddie notices, are too wide, too bright from where she whips her head around to the sight behind her, only to startle and look at Eddie once again.
There's too much spinning round his brain, and he’s forgetting something, he knows he is.
He’d got Buck into his harness, double- no triple checked every buckle and loop, he’d looked Buck in the eye and asked him to come home with him. To him.
Then.
Then Buck had climbed as he had manned the controls. He’d stopped, with panic in his voice and then the world had lit up.
No.
His sharp intake of breath must tip Hen off because she starts to speak, to say his name as Eddie gets a skinned-hand beneath himself and pushes upward, looking past her.
Backlit by the highrise lights, Buck’s blurred form sways from his final stop two-thirds up the extended ladder, only the single strap of fabric suspending him from plummeting to the asphalt below.
- The 6b!lightinng Strike Spec Fic or, 'The boys get struck by lightning, a hospital bed is privy to yet another life-altering conversation, and even without his memory Buck's body could never forget his Diaz boys.'
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So just as a recap, In 9-1-1 6b so far we're getting:
Eddie thrown off the firetruck
Buck falling from the ladder (double buddie injury!!!!)
Lightning storm
Buckley parents visiting
Albert's back too!!
Ravi is returning
Madney in their new house
Bobby, Athena & May teaming up as a detective trio
Hen & Karen are yet to know that Denny has been to see his bio dad
Donor Buck storyline is still in play (jesus christtt)
An episode described as "trippy" and "something we've never done before" thats titled "In Another Life" (its giving alternate reality what if/coma dream vibes)
- In addition to that the fact that 6x10 & that one are part one/part two's!!
Eddie starting to date again (another jesus christ bc I also forgot about this)
Did I miss anything?? Skss
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the-likesofus · 1 year
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lightning crashes
AKA the coma!buck brain rot has taken hold and is now steering the ship
the insanity that is this fic started because of this post by @deluweil
6x10 spec fic // Coma!Buck
9-1-1 on Fox | 9783 words | eddie diaz needs a hug...badly, buck is asleep for most of this, medical inaccuracies cos science is only here for the drama, major injury but he lives, angst with a happy ending, getting together
Read on AO3
The sky is illuminated as he falls, and Eddie can clearly see the outline of the engine as he's thrown backward through the air. The crack of his helmet hitting the ground echoes through his skull and reverberates down the length of his spine. The nerves in the ends of his fingers tingle with the impact and the wind is knocked out of his lungs. 
He heaves a breath and groans as he tries to roll onto his side. His head is spinning and he feels a little bit nauseous. Bobby is next to him in an instant with a hand on his shoulder and around his back, carefully leveraging Eddie to sit up straight and then pulling him to his feet. 
“Are you okay?” Bobby shouts over the thunder and the rain. Water pours over the shoulders of his turnout and Eddie can feel it sliding beneath the collar of his own coat. “Eddie? Are you hurt?”
In his daze, Eddie struggles to meet Bobby’s eyes, looking around and taking in flashes of the parking lot as lightning continues to create a strobing effect. The engine is to his right. The platform at the base of the ladder is singed and blackened not a foot from where he was standing as the arm bounces and swings precariously. 
Eddie swings his head around again, wrenching himself out of Bobby’s grasp.
“Buck? Buck!” He can’t see him. Through the rain and the wind, his eyes track the length of the aerial but Buck is nowhere to be seen. “No, no no. Buck!”
Eddie takes one stumbling step after another, every bone in his body aches and screams in tandem with the shouts climbing up his throat in desperate chorus. “Buck!” 
Absently Eddie knows that Bobby is following him as he rounds the engine, still scanning the arm of the ladder and the ground beneath it. 
There.  
Eddie scrambles across the tarmac, his chest heaving and his heart aching as he races toward the heap of limbs and kevlar. The reflective strips on Buck’s turnout catch in the next flash of lightning and the BUCKLEY printed across his back is illuminated like a beacon. He’s laying on his front with one side of his face pressed into the tarmac, his arms, and legs folded beneath him on uncomfortable angles. 
“Buck! Buck! Can you hear me?” Eddie gets to his side and sinks to his knees, choking on a sob. Buck’s eyes are open but vacant, his helmet is resting on the ground a mere five feet from his body, slowly rocking back and forth on its rounded edge. 
“Buck. Please.” He gasps and his hands shake as he reaches out for his best friend. Eddie’s hands never shake. He doesn’t panic, he does not panic. “Buck!” 
Bobby’s hands land on Eddie’s shoulders and when that isn’t enough he grips under his armpits and bodily drags Eddie backward as Hen and Chimney materialize on either side of Buck’s prone body. “Eddie, Eddie. Come on.”
“No! No, please. Buck!” He’s hysterical, he knows he’s being ridiculous. Screeching and crying are doing nothing to help Buck but something horrible has taken him over at the site. 
Bobby trips over his own feet under Eddie's dead weight and they both fall to the ground. Bobby’s arms wrap around Eddie’s shoulders like a vice and he sinks into him with a heavy, shaking sigh, exhaling out his nose as his own tears mix with the rain streaming down his cheeks. 
He whispers as if there is anyone who can hear him over the wind and the rain. Anyone. “Please.”
continue on AO3
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chaosandwolves · 1 year
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Chim hurt. Only Hen and Buck are wearing a harness.
So Eddie and Chim are trapped and Hen and Buck out of their minds coming to the rescue. Both Chim and Hen will be confronting Eddie and Buck about WHY they're absolutely losing it and make them half admit their feelings.
Buddie hug each other hard when Hen and Buck finally get to Chim and Eddie.
Last scene:
Eddie opens the door to a nicely dressed Buck sheepishly holding flowers in his hand.
"Hey"
"Hey"
"Uhm I thought I'd bring you these." He hands over the flowers and Eddie smiles.
From behind Eddie a grinning Chris and an amused looking Carla appear who says, "Ok I'll be taking these. You boys go and have fun."
Eddie presses a quick kiss on top of Chris' head and walks out to the car. Buck grins at Carla and Chris says, "Have a good date, Buck, " while he starts giggling and Buck looks kind of embarrassed.
"Thanks buddy," he answers and Carla winks at him before Buck follows Eddie to the car.
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toughpaperround · 1 year
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Poker nights - a 911 Rec List (2/3)
SPOILER ALERT for season 6 episode 13, "Mixed Feelings"
All because a person dropped a set photo, there are (still more!) fics:
"Arm Candy" by @princessfbi (G, 8k) in which Buck acts cool. Totally cool.
"Undercover Husbands" by Im_Basically_Shakespeare (T, 6k) in which they're undercover, they're husbands, but Athena says they're definitely not On A Mission.
"Winners and losers" by Taruolento  | @taruolentoorsomething (T, 4k) in which parents from Christopher's school have a fun poker night.
See also part 1, 3, or check out a 911 masterlist of themed rec lists
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Bah! I'm not even finished with the first scene and it's already almost 5K words, this may be long, apologies in advance...
Enough of this back and forth, enough of the trauma pouring into each of them until they explode. Explosions are never beautiful. They are messy and dark, sneaking into your veins until all you can feel is a pain that is screaming to burst your skin. The things they didn’t talk about built up like bricks, creating prisons with no light that they couldn’t get out of. As Eddie watches Buck carefully ascend the ladder, he is set on his decision.
He knows Buck will fight him. But he also knows Buck’s tricks. The sly grins and easy brushoffs. The deflection, the anger. He knows all pieces of him like they are himself.
Eddie can’t help but grin to himself as he steps up to the controls. Wanna go for the title? Buck’s distant words echo in his head, the cocksure smile on his face and a step a little too close to be purely platonic. He remembers at the time thinking ‘What would be the problem with taking a step closer himself,’ but as he did with so much at that time, he shoved it back down.
Now?
Now, Eddie’s ready to go for the fucking title.
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eddiebabygirldiaz · 1 year
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fuck it friday
Tagged by @shortsighted-owl @spotsandsocks @rewritetheending @messyhairdiaz @rogerzsteven
Thank you my loves! 💖
Here's a snippet from my spec fic which should be finished either today or tomorrow (let me know if you want to be tagged when it's posted!)
They stand like that, Eddie’s hand on Buck’s scarring and Buck’s hand on Eddie’s, like they are a closed loop, only whole when connected like this. There’s love and comfort and safety and yes there is also pain and trauma and fear, but there’s no corners, no edges, just one seamless line that travels around and around, no end and no beginning.
Eddie drops his gaze from Buck’s, unaware of how long they’ve been standing like this, slowly inching closer until they are sharing breath. His eyes land on the very faint bruising left along Buck’s ribs.
Bruising caused by him.
The ribs he broke are healed now, but the remnant of that stain, of that hurt brought by Eddie’s hands makes him want to weep.
He releases his hold on Buck’s arm and taps the tips of his fingertips against the faded yellow splotch. “I’m sorry.” The words are pulled from in between his own ribs, rough and scraped raw.
A wrinkle forms in between Buck’s brows and he steps in closer, ducking his head to meet Eddie’s eyes. “For what?”
“For this,” Eddie replies, tracing along the edges of the bruise.
Buck still looks confused, so Eddie lets the words spill out of him. “Your heart stopped beating. It wasn’t beating, Buck. So, I–I started doing compressions. I had to do it all the way to the hospital. You were just–gone and I was so desperate to get you back. I’ll never forget the way it felt for you to be so still. I’ll never forget the way it felt when your ribs broke under my hands.” I’ll never forget how it felt when something, everything, within me broke too.
“Eddie,” Buck breathes. His name sounds like devotion and devastation and pain and awe all wrapped into one coming from Buck’s mouth. Eddie wonders how it tastes on Buck’s tongue.
“Eddie, look at me,” Buck pleads, so Eddie does.
Buck removes his hand from Eddie’s shoulder and wraps it around the side of his neck. His hand is so warm and soft and rough and big and Eddie feels safe for the first time in three weeks. Buck pulls Eddie in until their foreheads are touching. “You saved me,” he breathes onto Eddie’s lips.
The words travel down his throat and enter his lungs, exploding with soft cracks and pops, flowering through his blood with warm sparks.
Taging @elvensorceress @hippolotamus @loveyourownsmiilee @spaceprincessem @lostinabuddiehaze @heartbeatdiaz @fatedbuddie @dickley-buddie @monsterrae1 @jobairdxx @buddierights @ajunerose @thekristen999 @gayedmundodiaz
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You can’t tell me that this...
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And this...
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...Aren’t the same image. And there’s something about the role of their shared vocation in their relationship. It’s what’s between them, connecting them and separating them in a way. The truck in 414 and the ladder in 610. Like they both have to mentally get past The Job™️ to see what more they are/can be to each other???
I think it’s interesting that buck was pointedly not in uniform when he saved (uniformed) eddie in 414 but both buck and eddie are in full turnout gear when eddie saves buck in 610.
I’ve talked before about why I think buck was “without his armor” aka uniform in 414. He had to save eddie as himself, not just as a firefighter doing his job. And season 5 bore that out. He was taking care of chris off duty, he was in the room for eddie’s breakdown off duty, he helped eddie remember his purpose and heal off duty. Buck was himself and not just his professional role. The two of them have more than just firefighting between them but they have to start seeing that and buck supporting eddie’s healing in s5 was the start or at least a huge step forward in that revelation.
Eddie is more reserved. More attached to his firefighter armor. He is growing and healing. No doubt! But he’s still a person who plays the deep things close to the vest and the only/main person who’s seen eddie's hand (buddie poker pic, anyone?!) when it comes to really deep breakdown-level emotions is buck. We all know that bobby is a close second (ie the post-shannon cage fighting arc) but this post isn’t about him lol.
Eddie knows buck has gotten close to him in a way that no one else really has and it scares the shit out of him. I know the fandom likes to act like eddie letting buck in is easy somehow but I honestly don’t think that’s true. My dude had to literally break down a whole ass door to get to the truly and fully vulnerable and hurting version of eddie. Anyway eddie still struggles with letting the deep stuff fully show, even with the people he loves and who he knows love him. He’s getting better - much better! - but he’s still not there yet. I think the high ladder and full turnout gear during the lightning strike somehow speaks to that???
In 6b I think Eddie has to do something similar to what buck did in 5b. While buck was kinda forced by the circumstances to start to literally and figuratively dwell in or more fully inhabit his deeper connection to the diaz fam, eddie has to choose to take off his armor. He has to choose to open up about how much buck means to him. This would be a nice progression from buck breaking down the door. Eddie has to let him into his vulnerability and pain. I think we’re gonna get that in 611 or later in 6b. The hospital visits in 6b are ripe for eddie's emotional unshelling and I can't wait.
I don’t think 611 will be a love confession or anything ofc 😔 but we will absolutely (eventually) get a heartfelt speech about what buck means to eddie and chris and how he has to come back to them because they love him and honestly can’t imagine their lives without him.
We already saw from preview that eddie is torn up inside over buck's accident. Now he has to let all that pain hang out. Buck was dangling from that ladder, and so was eddie in a way with no emotional harness. Buck was in the same emotional place back in 413/414 but we didn't get a full deep emotional buddie conversation about it. I'm hoping Healing!Eddie delivers his half of that conversation in 6b. I have a sneaking suspicion that eddie is going to say or show a lot of his emotional state while buck is unconscious and we may have to wait for the actual shared conversation between them, but maybe the show will surprise me and we'll get a good start to a real conversation in 611. *dreaming big*
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