#He just got out of a very toxic relationship give him some space

[kakusu-shipping]

I was the sadistic po3 ask and you are so right. I honestly hadn't thought about it for very long its the vibe he gives off initially but the more I think on it the more I realize hes the type to fall little by little and then all at once. The type to call you an idiot and give you advice in the same statement, to notice immediately when you change your hair style or a new shirt. The moment he realizes hes the type to do the oh. oh. oh no. Like thats his vibe. hes a dick but a loving one.

Okay FIRST OF ALL anon that post is almost two years old at this point so. Welcome back. I'm sorry I was so harsh to your Sadistic Yandere P03 concept.

SECOND P03 acts of service Tsundere type is so funny I love that for him. He will deny he did that for you, or if he accepts it he expects gratitude of the highest caliber.

This doesn't feel very Yandere to me though this is very base P03 affection to me. But that's because to me P03 is the least Yandere out of the Scrybes.. and I think that's why the polycule broke up before you arrived??

He was the object of their obsessions, and it was smothering and toxic and terrifying. He hated it, he was scared, he was cadged, he could never do anything on his own or go anywhere without checking in on someone. He never had his own space, never had control...

Yandere P03 would then push that cycle of abuse onto you, take control from you, not forcefully, but just a little bit at a time. Manipulate your space slowly so you have fewer and fewer options on where to go, like shortening a leash on a dog. It takes time. It takes routine.

This though, the acts of service and catering to your comfort, is Post Recovery P03. A P03 who's had time, a LOT of time, to himself, to his space, and found loneliness. He wants you to want to come back, because deep down he needs you, but doesn't want to admit that, because to him it's wrong to need someone. It hits too close to home, make him feel too much like the other scrybes.

He'll give you reasons to want to come back, and it'll remind him of how Grimora would always lend him things so he'd have reason to return. How she'd gift him everything he'd wanted so he'd come back, how she'd loose several matches in a row, and only win the one he'd said was his last game, so he'd stay and challenge her to a rematch

He'll follow on your heel as you wander around his factory because it's dangerous and maze like, and it'll remind him of the feeling of being followed, of being watched, by Magnificus everywhere he went. The suffocating feeling of never being anywhere alone, of eyes that saw his every possible future always on him. He'll deny his affections to you and remind himself of Magnificus doing the same when he'd stumbled into a room covered wall to wall in paintings of himself, in situations he knew Magnificus was not with him

He'll spend time tailoring his game to your play style, making sure cards you like are more plentiful, making sure the puzzles are engaging and challenging, and he'll remind himself of Leshy, the worst of them all, and that cabin full of intrigue. Of story and hard fights and difficult puzzles and nights of "Just one more round" turned three and four. When he floats just above you to feel superior he'll be reminded of the wall that use to be a door that he'd pressed himself against Leshy towered above him, a man who'd say one thing and feel another, who'd played the hero over and over in their games, and revealed himself the villain when P03 attempted to leave

He doesn't want to need you in the same way the other Scrybes had needed him

#Emile's Writing #Ask to tag #P03 X Reader #PO3 X Reader #Yandere #Mentioned anyway and discussed but not really the main point I guess #Well I mean kind of actually #Inscryption X Reader #GN!reader #Post Yandere Polycule P03 is probably my favorite way to write him #He was the object of their affection and he got away but not unscathed #Mags can be really fucked up if you really sit on his concepts for long enough #God. GOD. #TWO YEARS. #It's been two years huh I haven't touched much Inscryption X Reader sense then #You caught me on a Yandere kick again anon #I don't know where you've been for 2 years but glad to see you #Sorry I shut down you Sadistic Yandere idea so quick I was not jiving with it back then #And idk I have a VERY specific take on P03 #He just got out of a very toxic relationship give him some space #He needs you he doesn't want to need you but he needs you #He just needs some time to learn that it's okay to need someone...

[dark-fics-4-you]

Heyyy saw ur request were open what about dark!rafe catches you talking shit about him to your friends over text???

How a Girlfriend is Supposed to Act

Warnings: noncon, forced sex, domestic violence, choking, slapping, oral (m!recieving), toxic relationship, gaslighting

Despite being with Rafe for almost a year, you had learned all of the quirks that he had when it came to his possessiveness very early on.

The first time you caught him reading your texts, you were surprised by just how nonchalant he was about the entire situation.

He was sitting on your bed after you returned from grabbing the two of you a snack, scrolling through your phone, not even bothering to look up at you until you asked him what he was doing.

“You’re my girlfriend, Y/N.” He said it slowly, like he was reminding you of something you yourself couldn’t possibly forgot. The accusing fire in his gaze made you squirm. “Of course I have the right to look through your phone.”

At first you were too surprised to react. You had never really had a reason to look through Rafe’s phone, but you imagined he wouldn’t be too happy if you did.

“Why the fuck do you look so nervous, huh?” He was starting to sound annoyed, and his eyes were flicking between meeting yours and scanning your phone. “Got something you’re trying to hide from me?”

“What? No, Rafe! I just didn’t expect to find you going through my phone, that’s all.” You explained breathlessly. You didn’t know why he was accusing you of trying to keep secrets from him.

Unfortunately, the last thing that you should have done in that moment was try to snatch your phone away from Rafe.

His hand shot out, tightly gripping your wrist as he dug his fingers into the bone beneath your skin. You cried out in pain and watched as your phone fell onto the bed, before bouncing to the floor.

Your boyfriend was furious now, easily pulling you onto the bed by your wrist and onto your back at a painful angle before straddling you. You struggled beneath him, trying hopelessly to stop him from putting his hands on you

When Rafe slapped you across the face the first time, your ears rang and you swore that your vision went white for a moment.

Every sound became muffled but you could hear Rafe angrily chastising you from above, “dumb bitch. I mean, I pay for your fucking phone, so yeah, you’re not gonna talk back to me when I go through it.”

That was months ago, and you later learned that that wasn’t even the first time that Rafe had gone through your phone.

You weren’t cheating on Rafe, that much was 100% true. The problem was that Rafe’s definition of cheating included behaviors that you knew were not cheating.

Texting your classmate a question about homework turned into a two hour long fight that culminated in Rafe giving you a black eye.

After Rafe saw you had and Topper had sent each other a couple funny posts in instagram dm’s, he choked you so hard you passed out, leaving you to cover up the extensive bruising on your neck around your friends and family to avoid explaining what had happened.

Ever since then you had learned to be careful about who you texted, and if you ever texted anyone Rafe wouldn’t approve or said something that he wouldn’t like, you made sure to delete the conversations.

You were always so diligent in covering your tracks.

Except for the one time you really needed to.

After another argument with Rafe had become physical, once you finally got some space away from him you had texted a friend, vaguely venting your frustrations with him, without revealing too many details to make her suspicious that Rafe was hurting you.

As you shakily typed out the texts you couldn’t help but think back on the fight you had had. After catching a guy staring at you in the club, the moment you returned home, Rafe had been quick to grab you by the throat, pushing you up against the wall before hurling insults at you.

“I mean you dress like such a fucking slut, no wonder I have to chase these guys off. I bet you wanted his attention, didn’t you?” His eyes narrowed as he looked down at you with disgust.

You were so shocked by his outburst you had barely registered the fingers crushed your throat, and you finally gasped for air against his strong hand. “N-no, Rafe!”

His grip tightened as he regarded your fearful eyes, “nah, you always think you can fool me sweetheart but you never can.” His chuckled, but there was no hint of humor in his eyes, “I saw you looking at him when we first walked in.”

You shook your head against him, tears gathering in your eyes as you begged with him, “I wasn’t baby-”

“Shut the fuck up, Y/N.” He spat at you, squeezing so hard you were sure you would have deep purple bruises on your neck tomorrow.

“I never should have let you outta the house wearing that dress. You were looking for trouble walking around like that.” Rafe growled, his eyes were ice cold. You knew that he was itching for a fight, and you didn’t want to give him what he wanted.

“I’m sorry,” you struggled to force the words out with such little breath and Rafe finally gave you a respite when he loosened his grip on your throat. “You okayed it before we went out, I thought it wouldn’t be a problem.”

“I knew every guy at that bar would be trying to fuck you with their eyes, but I didn’t think you’d be doing the same to them!” The more he spoke, the more pissed off he seemed to be making himself. You knew that he was just convincing himself that his actions were justified.

When he tossed you to the floor, you yelped in pain when your shoulder hit the hard wood. You barely had time to reach for your tender neck before Rafe grabbed a fistful of your hair and forced you to look up at him.

“I mean, do you even love me anymore, Y/N?” His voice sounded hurt, and even though this wasn’t the first time he had used this card on you in the middle of putting his hands on you, you couldn’t deny the tug on your heartstrings you had when you looked into your boyfriend’s eyes.

“Of course I do, Rafe!” You insisted, knowing that your enthusiasm was expected and there would be consequences if you didn’t play along.

You were terrified of your boyfriend, and after being with him for so long, you were aware of the ways to deescalate a tense situation. In moments like these you would have said anything to protect yourself.

“Nah, you don’t mean that. You haven’t been yourself lately baby. Always too busy with work to spend time with me and now you’re talking back to me?” He shook his head, tsk-ing as he glared at you disgustedly. “Not to mention, you haven’t been fulfilling all of your duties as my girlfriend.”

You stared at him, puzzled and not understanding his meaning, “what are you talking about?”

“What are you talking about?” He repeated back to you in a mocking tone, like he couldn’t believe how dumb you were to not get it. “I mean, it’s been, what, five days since you last let me have sex with you? I have needs, Y/N. And when you can’t just lay on your back and spread your legs for me, you’re being a bad girlfriend.”

His words stung, and you couldn’t tell if the tears in your eyes were because of the large hand tangled into your hair, or because your boyfriend was acting like you owed him sex, like you were in the wrong right now.

“Now you’re gonna make it up to me, because you are really pissing me off right now, and I don’t want to hear any fucking complaints, do you understand?”

Your body was screaming in resistance, but you numbly realized that you were nodding your head. Rafe’s hand left your hair, finding your chin and gripping your jaw hard.

“Use your words, sweetheart,” the sick grin that was spread across his lips told you exactly how much Rafe was getting off on your humiliation right now and you wanted to be sick.

“I understand.” You forced the words past your gritted teeth, swallowing down the bile that threatened to come up.

Rafe unbuttoned his pants before sliding the zipper down and pushing them down his legs before pulling off his boxers as well.

His dick was hard, a bead of precum already pearled at the tip of his intimidating length.

You swallowed nervously, already afraid of how rough your boyfriend was going to be. You felt like you weren’t ready at all, but the sharp pain the bloomed on your cheek after Rafe slapped you told you that you must have hesitated for too long.

“Quit your damn procrastinating, Y/N,” he hissed, tangling his fingers into your hair again and pulling you to his dick, forcing the tip past your plump lips.

You didn’t have any time to be surprised, gagging and choking on him as he pushed himself deeper towards your throat. He groaned at the feeling of your throat squeezing his cock, urging himself further into the back of your mouth.

Rafe was in heaven, basking in the sight of your teary eyes and the ruined mascara that now trailed down your cheeks. You had looked so pretty at the club tonight, but now you were a crying mess. The noises of your gagging and the steady sound of Rafe’s cock hitting the back of your throat filled the space. Nothing had ever made Rafe hornier than seeing your beautiful, tear filled eyes begging and pleading with his.

He reached out to your cheek, wiping up a bit of saliva that had been forced past your lips. Your glassy eyes were unfocused now that you had given up any thoughts of resistance, too cock drunk to try protesting against the stronger man.

You were doing all you could not to gag on him and choke, knowing full well that that would only spur him on. Every time you pushed at his thigh to get him to ease up, he would slap your hand away with an annoyed grunt.

His pace was relentless now, one hand was gripping your hair and the other was at your throat, holding you still so he could push himself deeper.

“That’s right baby, fuck,” he bit back his groans, ignoring your gagging and desperate eyes when he forced himself too far down your throat, literally choking you with his cock. “Oh fuck- god Y/N, you’re better than any sex doll, you know why?”

He knew you couldn’t answer him, especially since he had started thrusting faster past your messy lips, but he still paused to drink in the sight before him.

“Because they can’t fight back,” Rafe sneered, picking up his pace again, reaching a punishing fervor.

The blond’s dick was slamming into the back of your throat while the large hand at your throat squeezed in warning anytime you so much tried to pull back.

He sped up on final time, chasing his high by forcing you to take all of his cock. Rafe held you in place and watched you choke on him for a couple seconds before letting out a low groan and spilling his salty seed down your throat, giving you no choice but to swallow every drop of it.

When he pulled his dick out of your mouth, you took a gasping breath, but weren’t allowed much air before Rafe slapped you across the face hard.

“From now on, I expect this and more from you every night we’re together. Because that’s how my girlfriend is supposed to act. And if you think about giving me any lip about that, then I’m gonna make you wish you had just kept your pretty mouth shut, got it?”

That rest of the night was no better than the beginning, after Rafe had helped you clean up, he basically immediately led you to your bed.

He chuckled in satisfaction when you didn’t fight back against his wandering hands, and as held tight to your wrists, plunging his cock into your slick cunt, he didn’t say anything about the tears rolling down your cheeks.

The next morning you had woken up sore, your entire body ached, and you weren’t surprised when you looked in the mirror and saw the red and purple blooming around your throat.

Rafe was still asleep, his deep snores letting you know that he wouldn’t be waking up soon.

You quietly snuck into the bathroom, grabbing your phone off of the bedside table on the way. Once you had shut and locked the door behind you, you exhaled deeply, unlocking your phone to check for messages.

Your friend had texted you asking how your night had gone, and feeling perhaps a little too honest, you told her that the two of you had had an “argument.”

���he thought i was checking out a guy at the bar and said some really rude things to me last night.’ You laughed to yourself as you stared at your own words through blurry eyes. It was both funny and sad to you how used to covering for Rafe you now were.

The bathroom felt more cramped when you remembered that Rafe was just on the other side of the door, despite being asleep.

A new notification popped up soundlessly and you read your friend’s text. She was joking about gathering all of your mutual friends to gang up on Rafe.

If only she knew the extent of what Rafe had done to you. You were sure she wouldn’t be joking then. In spite of that, you were angry with Rafe and wanted to blow off a little steam with your friend.

Which is why you felt emboldened to continue texting her.

‘he’s such an asshole sometimes. i’ve been thinking about breaking it off with him soon.’

You huffed, putting your phone down before finishing up in the bathroom and opening the door.

To your surprise, Rafe was standing on the other side, waiting for you to get out before he brushed past you without a word.

You noticed he was taking longer than he usually did to just pee, and when he finally stepped out of the bathroom, you realized with a horrible chill why he had been in there for so long.

Clutched in his hand was your cellphone, and you could see that it was open to the messages you had just sent.

“‘He’s such an asshole, I’ve been thinking about breaking it off??’” His voice was cold and you cringed hearing him speak your words. There was no denying he had read your texts.

You shivered, frozen in place as he stared you down, his blue eyes boring so deep into you that you swore you could feel them burning straight through you.

Your mouth was so dry, you had never felt so afraid of your boyfriend before. Even after everything he had put you through, you had never said anything about breaking up with him to his face. “Rafe, I-”

If your instincts hadn’t kicked in, you would have taken the blow right to your nose, however you had been lucky enough to dodge the phone fast enough that it only nicked your forehead before smashing into pieces against the wall behind you.

Unfortunately, while you had been focused on dodging your phone, the taller man had closed the gap between you, easily pushing you up against the wall by your throat and choking you with both hands. Rafe’s fingers pressed down against the bruises that they had left there the previous night.

You wanted to scream, but Rafe had knocked the wind out of you and no matter how hard you shoved him, he wasn’t giving up.

“You’re mine,” he hissed as you struggled against him. “Maybe I’ve been hitting you too much recently, because I don’t remember you being this stupid when we first started dating.”

Before you could comprehend what was happening, Rafe had spun you around and pushed you face first into the bed. One of his hands was forcing your head against the mattress, while the other pawed at your silk pajama shorts, opting to rip away the fabric covering you before freeing his hard cock from his boxers.

“You think I’m an asshole?” He growled, the tip of his cock brushed against your slick cunt and you shuddered at the feel of him beginning to force himself inside of you.

“I’ll show you how much of an asshole I can be.”

#rafe cameron #dark!rafe cameron #outer banks #obx #rafe cameron noncon #dark rafe cameron #rafe cameron smut #rafe cameron fanfic #how a girlfriend is supposed to act #rafe cameron x reader

[ncteez]

homewrecked. (j.ww)

Wonwoo doesn’t seem to realize that you’re giving him the best option out of a relationship that doesn’t even involve you. With a cheating best friend on one side, and a loyal Wonwoo loving her from two hours away on another, you decide that home wrecking isn’t always a bad idea.  or the one where wonwoo fights internal demons over wanting you bc he’s in a relationship that he doesn’t even realize is falling apart.

ao3 | m.lists | leave feedback and reblog to give wonwoo a boner

minors do not interact. 

WORDCOUNT― 12k

PAIRING― wonwoo x afab reader

CONTENT― toxic relationships, fluffy sex?? like it’s very intimate

WARNINGS― infidelity, there’s some angst but it gets fixed with fucking, mentions of reader having tits that jiggle and she’s also shorter than him, alcohol consumption

NOTE― will i ever stop writing smut from his point of view? probably not. we love to know what a man is thinking while he’s balls deep. anyway, this ain’t proof read bye. 

smut tags under cut:: 

smut tags― big dick wonwoo, making out, leg humping lmao, finger fucking, oral [m receiving], “IT’S NOT FUCKING, IT’S MAKING LOVE!!!”, cliche “omg ur pussy was like, meant for me”, mating press position, unprotected sex, cream pie, he’s in love bro– 

~

Wonwoo didn’t know why he needed you so badly and the thoughts ate him up. Day after day, watching you dangle yourself in front of him like you don’t know he’s definitely not the type to take you up on the offer. 

The issue is that he would take up the fucking offer if you had done this five months ago before he entered into a long distance relationship with your best fucking friend. She moved out of town, and two hours wasn’t going to stop him from pursuing that relationship. You, however, you were definitely going to make him stop pursuing. Why? Because your best friend is a bitch, and it’s not like she hasn’t texted you about all of the dicks she’s been sucking since she left.

Why not give him the revenge he doesn’t know he needs? 

~

He can feel his eyes burning holes through that thin shirt you're wearing and at this point, it’s painful to try and pretend he doesn’t stare. Even more painful to pretend he’s being nonchalant about it each time you get a little too close to him, each time you bend over directly in front of him, and surely each time you decide not to wear a bra while wearing said thin shirt. 

He doesn’t understand why he keeps showing up for you. Before, it was because you were a mutual friend between him and his girlfriend. You were cool, laid back, and fun to hang out with. His girlfriend never seemed to mind when the two of you would hang out alone, then again that was quite a rare occasion before she moved away. Now though, hanging out with you seems to have far more intent behind it than just avoiding boredom on a weekend. Now, you appear to be more interested in what he has to say, what he looks like, how he’s feeling.

Wonwoo can’t quite pin point the moment in time where you started acting this way, but he sure as fuck can pin point the first day you seemed off around him. He thought he was thinking too hard, wondering why you knocked on his door on a cold December evening with no jacket on, but wonderful cleavage offering firm jiggles with each shiver. 

It got to the point that by the time spring hit, and he was still hanging out with you on the regular, that he was almost annoyed that the temperature got warmer. Sure, it was more of a reason for you not to wear clothes, but it doesn’t feel as intentional when you’re quite literally dressing for the weather.

Still, you’re here again. In his apartment, sprawled out on his couch with the remote in your hand as if this is your own space. You really do make yourself at home, a little too at home. No bra under that thin shirt, the air conditioning raising goosebumps on your skin and perking up your nipples each time you lift your arms up for a long and audible stretch for him to surely suffer over later. 

Hanging out with you shouldn’t feel like this, because he has a girlfriend.

“What do you want for dinner?” He asks from the kitchen, pretending that the two of you don’t seem like a couple on your own, as if he wasn’t just texting his actual girlfriend.

“Dunno,” You shrug, turning your head to look at him and noting his slow response of bringing his eyes from your tits to your face. “We should go out.”

His heart thumps heavily at those words but is very quick to realize that you’re absolutely not asking to be his girlfriend right now. 

“Huh?” He asks nonchalantly, averting his eyes back to his near-empty cabinets with a huff.

“Like, go out? To a bar? A restaurant? A club?”

He lets his arms fall from the cabinet as he closes it in defeat and makes his way to throw himself onto the couch next to you.

“You, of all people, should know I don’t go out anymore.” He retorts in a long sigh, averting to the fact that those are options for single men or couples that seek those kinds of experiences together. 

“Why not? She still goes out.”

The first secret is out, though you kind of assumed he knew already.

“Oh? Does she?” He asks, seemingly not too bothered. “That’s good, she deserves to go out and meet people considering she moves to a brand new city.” 

You nod in agreement, rolling your eyes up to look at his living room ceiling. 

“Come on, she knows I’d be there to fend off any girls trying to get in your pants.” You argue with him, or rather, you try to convince him. 

“And you plan to go looking like that?” He asks, turning his face to you and once again staring straight at the way your tits leave no room for imagination.

“Uh, yeah? It’s not like I'm the one under lock and key.”

He rolls his eyes at you but offers a small nod, standing to his feet and shuffling to his bedroom. 

“At least put on a jacket or something, I think it’s supposed to rain tonight.” 

You nod, smiling as you follow him to a room that should be off limits to you. Mostly pleased by the fact that you’re going out with Wonwoo alone, and surely you’re about to be wearing his jacket over the shirt you wore specifically for him to look at. 

~

You were right, you are wearing his jacket as you step past the security at the club. Shortly after the two of you left a small diner, you nearly thought he was going to have cold feet and not want to go, even after taking the time to fix his hair and wear a nice outfit. Thankfully, he didn’t. Thankfully, he’s right at your side appearing as nervous as he was the day he asked your best friend out. Thankfully, he looks like he’s here for you and not to be your wingman. 

“Lighten up, we’re just here to have fun.” 

He nods, looking at you and the way his jacket looks on you. It shouldn’t look so good, you shouldn’t look so good to him. He can’t help but feel like he’s crossing a line despite learning his girlfriend goes out quite often without so much as telling him about it. Even before he started dating her, it’s not like clubbing was his thing. He just went with you and his girlfriend, occasionally letting his own friends tag along to find some raunchy date for the night. 

“You’re right,” He nods again, encouraging himself. “Just gotta get in the mood of things I guess.”

You smile at him and pretend you heard what he just said over the bass of the music, and opt to point with your head toward the bar that holds a short line of people appearing to be ready to drink. He follows behind you, being led from a comfortable distance in a space that should force him up and against you. Consistently, you look back to make sure he hasn’t been lost in the crowd. To make sure he isn’t being grabbed at by all of the people who would surely want to pick him up tonight if they find him standing alone somewhere. 

He keeps the pace though, shoving up next to you by the bar so that you both can order your first drink of the night. All you can do is look at him briefly any chance you can get as the two of you wait.

He looks uncomfortable here, but incredibly handsome in the darkened room with the neon LED lighting flashing across his cheeks. You’ve seen him in lighting like this before, usually pressed up against your best friend, but now you feel as though he needs you here for comfort. Then again, he wouldn’t even be in this situation if it weren’t for you arguing that the two of you come here. 

Still, you know how he acts when the alcohol hits him, especially in a loud room full of hidden secrets that people are releasing without a single hint of fear. You have some secrets too, ones that you’ve felt bad for keeping, but in a way, it isn’t your job to tell him. 

The snide part of you likes seeing him take an interest in you. Someone so entirely loyal shouldn’t be caught up with someone like your best friend. You’re actually shocked he gave in so quickly to even come to this club with you, even more shocked at the way he continued to hang out with you despite your obvious attempts of seduction.

You started doing it a mere day after your “best friend” texted you a selfie, post-sex glow practically dripping out of her sleepy smile within another man’s bed. With an arm wrapped around her, one that did not belong to Wonwoo. You knew it wasn’t him, because she texted that shit the same day Wonwoo had his job interview.

He got that job, and part of you wonders if the excitement in your friend’s voice for him over the excited call he gave her later was really for him getting the job, or if it was because she had some really great sex with some non-boyfriend. Because of course you were at Wonwoo’s house helping him pick a professional outfit, of course you were there letting him recite the things he wanted to present at the interview. Of course that’s what you were doing, you helped him prepare and then waited around his place until he got back with the news. He’s your best friend’s boyfriend, and arguably, he was also your best friend by that point. 

After that, all respect for the relationship left you, and instantly you took matters into your own hands. Be there for him, be around him, be a friend to him, and of course, try to get revenge for him. Even if that meant using your own body because for some reason, you felt protective. You felt possessive.

Seeing the way he looks at you, even while being in a loyal relationship, is arguably pushing you past the boundary of just wanting revenge for him. You can see him argue with himself in his head, the doubt of why he’s looking at you this way, the doubt of why you’re doing this so suddenly. It’s attractive seeing him fight a loyalty that his own girlfriend doesn’t even give to him. It’s attractive to see him here, next to you, spouting out his drink order and looking at you briefly as if to tell you it’s your turn.

And you do order, feeling the fabric of his jacket rub against your naked arms, and the zipper occasionally stimulating your breast beneath the thin shirt. Wearing no bra has both pros and cons. The pros being, constant stimulation and Wonwoo keeping his eyes attached to you and telling on himself. The cons, the bar tender and every other fucking person in this club appear to also be staring. 

Thankfully, the two of you grab your drinks shortly after and head straight around the dance floor and scout out a small couch in the back. Small as in, a two person seater with a small table in front of it. It’s a lucky snag on a saturday night to find an empty spot that perfectly fits the two of you, but neither of you seem to be complaining. 

You sit down next to him, feeling the warmth of his arm radiating immense heat as his eyes travel the loud room of dancing bodies, his drink in a hand that appears to be trying not to tremble. 

“Why’re you so nervous?” You whisper yell at him, taking a thoughtful sip of your drink before leaning forward and bringing your head playfully in front of his line of sight. 

“Just kind of doesn’t feel right to be here without her, y’know?” He responds, taking his own thoughtful sip and grimacing at how strong the drink is. Still, he continues to sip as he watches you roll your eyes at him in a huff.

“Oh my god, could you be any further up her ass right now?”

He almost feels offended by that comment. Wanting her to be here is not considering being up her ass, if anything, it’s being a good boyfriend. You continue to spit sarcasm at him though, looking dissatisfied with how he’s acting.

“How come she can go out and have fun and you can’t? Here, look.” You say, pulling out your phone and snapping a quick selfie with him. “Watch, she won’t mind.” 

You immediately send the selfie straight to her, with the small comment of “he agreed to be my wingman for the night.” 

Instantly, she responds with a kissy emoji, wishing you luck on your dick-search. That’s it. That’s all she sends. Even you feel your heart drop a little for him at just how much she doesn’t seem to care considering he’s practically stroking out over the idea of being here. 

“See?” 

He nods, taking another drink from his cup and nodding even harder. Honestly feeling a bit better that she at least knows he’s here. Mostly because he didn’t even know how to tell her that he’s going out to a fucking club with her best friend. 

“I’m so lame, god.” He laughs at himself, practically downing his drink by now and staring into your also already emptied cup. “I’ll go get us more drinks?”

You nod with a devilish grin, watching how his nervousness completely disappears to that of a confident man, in a club, who would have no issue with rejecting every single person who tries something with him.

There’s one issue though. Like, you commend him for that loyalty and you knew this would be a difficult task but, what if he genuinely rejects you too? Surely not, because at the end of the day, you’re the one who knows what’s happening behind his back. 

Most people would at least tell him what’s going on before trying to seduce him, and in all fairness, you don’t know why you haven’t yet. You guess you’d rather have him cheat on her back, just to show her that he’s not going to sit here and wait on her like she’s expecting him to. 

How is she gonna find out? You don’t know. 

~

The night is good, rain dripping outside is easily drowned out by both the booming music and the loud laughter Wonwoo throws at you every few minutes from people watching. The two of you have barely moved from the love seat, but have continued to drink for hours now. At this point, you’re the one staring at him, and he doesn’t even seem to avert his eyes as he continues to drink. 

From your tits to your eyes, to his jacket draped over you, all the way down to your legs and the way you move closer and closer to him, up to the point you throw both legs over his lap and he instantly grabs onto them to hold them in place. 

Still, he’s laughing. Playing it off perfectly as if it’s not intimate, as if it’s not something he would avoid if he hadn’t already downed four drinks. 

“Wonwoo,” You ask, getting closer to his ear to avoid yelling. 

His voice booms back at you, still yelling. 

“Yeah?” He responds, turning his cheek to meet yours in this moment of close conversation. 

“You look really good tonight.,” You say directly into his ear, hoping he hears you as well as you hear yourself. You’re trying to tip-toe past a boundary, but it’s not like you’re lying. 

“What?” He responds again, gripping your legs a bit tighter as he leans closer to you, his other hand reaching to your head to hold your lips closer against his ear. He really didn’t hear you, but it feels– you don’t know. It feels like something. 

“I said, you look really good right now.” You half-laugh into his ear, and he responds with a soft chuckle before pulling away from you with a shake of his head. 

“You’re being dumb,” He laughs as he continues to shake his head. “You’re just saying that because you’re drunk.” 

“No, really,” You smile, playing it off much like he is. As if it’s a joke. Still, you crowd up to him again, lips right up against the shell of his ear and continue to sweet talk him. “She’s lucky, I’m a little jealous.” 

You don’t hear him, but you can practically feel his skin go cold at your words. He doesn’t move, and you can argue that he doesn’t breathe for a solid thirty seconds. Which is strange because it’s not like the comment couldn’t be taken a few different ways. It appears he’s finally let it click in his head though. Right now, at this moment. 

“Hm?” You continue against his ear. 

Finally, he pulls from you, standing to his feet and letting your legs fall from his lap. You watch him nearly lose his balance as he tries to pretend he’s totally being normal about this, and totally not drunk.

“I’m gonna go get us another drink.” He says before walking off and not letting you say another word.

That, he does. He brings back another drink and appears now to be keeping his distance from you. And you, of course, with the alcohol bubbling in your belly, feel a bit too bold and far too interested in what you’re trying to do right now.

“Did she even call you today?” You ask, slowly making your way to the point of her not even texting him once she realized he was out with you tonight. 

He shakes his head, then goes back to bobbing it to the music as if to borderline ignore you.

“Did she call yesterday?” 

He ignores you. 

“The day before that?”

He finally snaps his head over to you, brows furrowed in frustration as he fixes his drunken eyes on yours.

“What are you getting at? She’s busy!” He raises his voice at you, half-laughing at your questions toward him. You can’t tell if it’s because he’s pitying himself or if he thinks you’re trying to get him to cheat on her with you. The sad part is that it would be true either way.

“Oh. Yeah. She’s definitely ‘busy’.” You comment with a roll of your eye, practically downing half of your drink in one gulp before standing up and now trying to catch your own balance. 

“If you’re gonna be this uptight, I’m just gonna go find someone else to hang out with.” You say defiantly, somehow hoping that he would get jealous. 

He just watches you walk away, unsure of how he feels and instantly pulling out his phone to text his girlfriend. Partly just to see if she would respond, and only half because he hadn’t realized how much her communication to him had dropped.

~

You’re not having fun with this hot guy you found yourself grinding up against. You can feel the frustration in your bones with each grind, and even worse, you can feel his eyes on you in a way that’s very different compared to Wonwoo.

Sure, your tits are out and on display but it’s not like you did it for this guy. He eats it up in the way you want Wonwoo to. Even if his eyes are softer and full of doubt, this guy shows no shame in what he wants. He could have a wife at home, and still he’s looking at you without guilt. 

Not that you support cheating. It’s a strange dilemma. Hating the fact that your best friend is doing it to Wonwoo, then countering her by fucking her man before letting him in on the reason why. It would be easier to just tell him, help him break up with her, and then woo him, but you feel angry enough for him that you prefer a more difficult route. The dramatic route. One that hurts her knowing he’s not bothered by her cheating because he has someone else to fuck now too.

Your drunk brain wonders what the fuck you’re doing here, with a guy that isn’t Wonwoo. So, your eyes wander around the room, landing on him still on that same love-seat, eyes glued to his phone. 

Not-so-politely, you break away from the man attempting to shove his hand down your pants and head straight back over to him. You knew he wasn’t going to chase you out onto the floor after how rude you ended up being to him, but you really don’t have it in you to let him just sit in a club alone with a girlfriend two hours away probably taking some dude balls deep right now. 

By the time you get to him and plop back down, he looks at you with a pained sort of face.

“Alright, turn it off.” You say, practically babying him as you grab his phone and hold the power button down. “She isn’t always the nicest.” You easily insult her to him, but he seems to agree by this point. 

“She left me on read.” He says with an annoyed sigh. “You think she’s gonna break up with me?”

God, the pity you feel in that moment is intensely guilty. Because no, she’s not going to break up with him. It’s the other way around, actually. 

“Hey, come on. You’re gonna ruin your buzz if you keep thinking about that.”

He nods to you, very nearly about to become the drunk-cryer before leaning against you with a heavy head, trying not to pay attention to your lack of reassuring him. 

“Not sure why you’re jealous though, she hasn’t even let me visit her.” He laughs in a sad way. “Kinda wish she looked at me the way you do sometimes.”

He trails off, feeling you shift from under his head and take in a deep breath.

“You’re pretty attached, huh?” You ask, opting not to pry at this moment, opting not to feel jealous. 

“Unfortunately.” He huffs, now lifting up and appearing to shake off his sadness. “Well, whatever happens, happens. At least I got you to hang out with.”

You nod proudly, now throwing your legs back onto his lap and staring at him. 

“Yeah, whatever happens, happens.” 

~

Oh boy, did stuff happen. 

Stumbling into and out of a taxi happened, wobbling into his apartment happened, feeling him tug against your shirt as he fell into his bed, practically dragging you down on top of him, happened. 

The most sobering moment was being entirely too drunk yourself to continue your plan with the night, stopping frozen as he looked up at you with a drunken smile and a small chuckle. The small voice coming from his lips saying, “You know, if I wasn’t with her I’d kiss you right now.” 

You remember very nearly kissing him anyway, but opting to playfully cover his mouth and roll over and off of him before promptly passing out directly next to him. 

And now you’re lying here at two in the afternoon, back facing him, with his arms clinging to you as if you belong here. You’re a little worried that he won’t remember what he said, and even more worried that he will.  The hangover is prominent and booming in your skull, and partially you hope he’ll have a headache too blinding to even realize that the person he’s clinging to isn’t his girlfriend. It’s you. 

Only a few minutes goes by before he stirs. His hands gripping you tightly, pulling you back and against him as he groans sleepily against your neck. You can practically feel his deep inhale of comfort by not waking up alone, until he freezes. 

“Oh, fuck,” He says suddenly, in a voice more awake than ever. “Shit, sorry. I didn’t mean to like–”

You roll over to look at him with your own sleepy smile, pretending as if you just woke up as well. 

“It’s fine.” You assure him, sinking further into the blankets and trying to ignore your headache. “I cuddle with my friends all the time.”

He stays silent, not quite sure of how to navigate the situation but ultimately feeling the sharp pound in his head and throwing his head back against his pillow with a huff. 

You’re a little sad that he doesn’t reach out again, but it’s kind of a given. The fact that he doesn’t ask you to leave his bed is enough for you right now.

“Do you remember anything from last night?” He asks reluctantly, internally hoping to god that you don’t. He vaguely remembers saying some stuff he shouldn’t have said, and doesn’t remember at all if he followed through with it or not.

You pick up on his tone of voice, careful and slow. 

“Not really.” You say back, acting as if you’re falling back to sleep.

He breathes out a small breath of relief, allowing the silence to take over the room. 

“Except for you saying you wanted to kiss me.” 

Wonwoo is actually fucking horrified that you remember, reaching a hand to his temple and rubbing harshly in a self-soothing way. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that.” He says back quietly, feeling the air become heavier and heavier. 

“Oh,” You start, feeling a bit of a pull inside of you. “Well, you were drunk, so I didn’t think you did anyway.”

He breathes out another sigh of relief. 

“Still, it felt good knowing.” You add. 

Wonwoo pauses, feeling the ground beneath threaten to crumble from under him, taking you, him, and his bed with it as he looks over at your back turned to him. Something inside of him is now pulling a bit as he studies the way you breath and lay against his plush pillows. Your voice sounded disappointed, and he doesn’t understand why he’s also disappointed in lying to you about it. He did mean it, but it doesn’t mean you were supposed to be aware of how much he wanted to kiss you. He can’t. He’s loyal.

Nevermind the fact that you’ve never slept over. Nevermind the fact that you’re in his fucking bed.

“I’m not going to tell her, don’t worry.” You say out to the silence, in such a tone that doesn’t really leave room for him to respond outside of feeling bad more for you, than for his girlfriend who can’t seem to give him the light of day. 

There’s another long moment of silence, and part of him wonders if you’ve already fallen asleep again. He can feel his headache get louder and louder in his ears and opts to try and sleep more too, because it feels like a better idea than dealing with this heavy atmosphere. 

And he’s not sure why he does it, but he very carefully rolls towards you and reluctantly puts an arm around you. It’s just cuddling, nothing more. Friends cuddle all the time, right?

When you shift under him, wrapping your fingers up with his, he’s unsure of why he doesn’t pull back, and even more unsure as to why your hand fits within his better than his own girlfriend’s does. 

~

It’s been a week of silence from Wonwoo since the night you slept over. When you officially woke up, he was still next to you, curled in on himself despite falling asleep in a way that should have been more telling than the silence in the room. You didn’t wake him because you knew he was pretending. The hint was that he didn’t want to talk about it, and he definitely didn’t want to look you in the eye. You took the hint.

So, you went home expecting him to text you at some point during the day. He didn’t. The next day? Also nothing. And now, a week later, still nothing. 

You’re a bit in your head. Each work day is filled with menial tasks that do not interest you, mostly because you can’t help but believe you went a bit too far. You were being too pushy, and it resulted in this. Now, even if you were to see him again, wearing those revealing outfits would feel more like a disrespect than a fun little game you’re playing.

It isn’t fair that he’s playing that game with you without knowing, and perhaps it’s time to just get down to the point and tell him. His girlfriend is cheating on him and you’ve been a bad friend to him. You could care less about how she feels about you trying to get her boyfriend in bed with you. 

His loyalty never faltered past staring at you and drunkenly admitting that he would kiss you if he wasn’t in a relationship. The task you gave to yourself was stupid, and to think Wonwoo would really pick you over her while still being with her was arguably the worst idea of your life. 

Your confidence has faltered beyond belief, to the point that expecting him to text now is null. Even if you were to reach out to tell him what’s happening behind his back, at this point it would just look like you’re trying to pry. Like you’re getting involved in a place you do not belong, and definitely weren’t invited. Possibly even, like you’re lying just to get to him. 

And you know, you would have stuck with the plan of silence, the plan of moving on from the situation, until she decided to snap you a billion and one selfies just the night before. Then again, it shouldn’t have surprised you when you opened snapchat this morning to see her, again, in a bed that isn’t Wonwoo’s. She must be out of her damn mind because his bed was warm and his arms were warmer. 

She, again, is smiling. She looks drowsy in each photo, the arm held against her gripping her tighter in each photo until you see a glimpse of his face. 

It shouldn’t piss you off, honestly, it shouldn’t. But the fact that she’s in bed with that man and not Wonwoo? Huge downgrade. The fact that she’s smiling bigger than you’ve ever seen her smile with Wonwoo? Worst best friend ever. 

You don’t even respond to her, and instead screenshot every single photo, ignoring the fact that it will notify her of it, and then you block her. 

You get a text at lightning speed from her immediately after taking at least nine different screenshots, catching a glimpse of the first line of text stating “what are you screenshotting for?” before blocking her number as well.

And then you sit, staring at the dirt in your camera roll before pulling up Wonwoo’s text box. 

Sitting there on your bedroom floor, you type out paragraph after paragraph explaining yourself and your behavior before dropping the bomb. Drafting it once, twice, erasing all of it and starting over. Then you get anxious and close out the text box, instead writing what you want to say in your head but never quite satisfied with it because, well, even if she’s cheating on him…there is no way to explain it in a way that would excuse how you’ve been acting towards him. 

Wallowing in your own self-pity, you seem to lose the point of the matter. Wonwoo is the one being fucked over, seemingly by both of you. Your best friend is taking advantage of him and so are you. 

Ding. 

Your phone goes off next to you, and part of you assumes it’s your “best friend” texting you from that guy’s phone instead, but your stomach drops the second you see Wonwoo’s name. 

Wonwoo: can you come over today? 

You almost want to say that you can’t, despite obviously wanting to. You’re anxious, you’re feeling awful, and you’re pissed off at the entire situation. 

You: why? what’s up?

Wonwoo: i wanna hang out? 

Well, maybe you can take advantage of his ignorance one last time. Surely he feels the intense awkwardness between the two of you, and he’s probably just wanting to put that to rest by hanging out like before. So, naturally, you’re going to go over under the idea of hanging out, and then find a way to tell him. Making no mention of how long you’ve known this to be going on, making no mention of your little mind game, or the revenge. 

After all, he deserves to know. 

~

Wonwoo is a little bit surprised that you show up in appropriate clothing. Not a hardened nipple in sight and you’re wearing jeans to cover your legs. He tries not to look at you in disappointment at this moment, and thankfully it goes unnoticed by you because, well, you’re blatantly avoiding looking anywhere near his face. 

He doesn’t like that you’re not looking at him. Hates that even an hour into the hangout, you’re offering very little conversation compared to normal. You’re not making jokes, you’re not flirting. 

While this is going on, Wonwoo feels like he’s staring far more than usual. Noting little things about you that he hadn’t gotten to pay close attention to before. The way your skin looks, your posture, the way you make a certain face when you seem to be thinking about something. 

In his head, he wonders if he prefers looking at you this way compared to simply staring at what your body could offer if he didn’t have a girlfriend. His heart still beats the same steady pace, but it doesn’t change the fact that he feels like, especially after last week, there’s something here and exploring it is something he’s been avoiding for far too long. 

It’s been there for a long time, and you never showed much interest until after he started dating your best friend. The fact that you started doing all that stuff after she moved away, while he’s trying to make things work from a distance? It was a hard thought to grasp, a hard feeling to admit. It seems he already admitted it to himself though. Putting together puzzle pieces in his mind that don’t quite fit. Ones where it’s him and his girlfriend, trying to fit your piece somewhere near him. It never fit until it was just you and him. 

He never wanted to admit how much he loved spending time with you, how much he loved looking at you, how badly he wanted to touch you. It only got worse after she left, and after you started being around him more without her. He would notice even more things about you that he liked, and the mental gymnastics only drove him to act like an idiot around you. It made him talk about his girlfriend more, as if to mute the thoughts he would have about you. 

Now though? He’s had time to think, he’s had time to figure things out, and ultimately, he’s had time to miss you. To see what it would be like without you around him for more than two days. 

He really did miss you. A lot. Arguably more than his girlfriend, who lives two hours away and hasn’t even allowed him to visit her. So, as he’s sitting next to you on the couch, he moves closer. 

When you get up to grab something to drink, he’s right behind you, absentmindedly placing a hand on your waist to reach up into the cabinet to grab you a glass before you can do it yourself. 

When you sit back down next to him on the couch, he scoots even closer, reluctantly throwing an arm over the back of the couch and gently playing with the collar of your shirt. 

All of those tiny touches bring your eyes to him a few times. The feeling of intimacy is more overwhelming than the day you lost your virginity. You didn’t have to do anything to get him to do it either. You’re not even trying anymore, and here he is, finding ways to get closer to you. Finding ways to invite you into his personal space. 

The air in his apartment feels intense. It feels untouchable to you in a way too, making your anxiety bubble even more as you waver on the line of telling him the truth or just enjoying the way he’s acting right now. There’s too much guilt involved though, as you turn to look at him and this time, you don’t break eye contact. 

He can tell you want to say something, but knows that you probably won’t speak your mind.

“What’s gotten into you?” You finally ask after a long moment of staring at him, and he just shrugs. 

“I just feel comfortable,” he tries to play it off, his mind feeling heavy with the fact that she hasn’t texted him for three days. “And little frustrated.”

Sexually. Considering he hasn’t touched a single person since she moved away. Not to mention the fact that you have been dressing in a way that made him need physical touch for so long now. Until today, anyway. All of those hang outs where you showed up looking ready to be touched, and then leaving untouched? All of those nights he spent alone in his room trying to get his girlfriend to call him, moan for him, or send him photos? All of those nights without love from either of you, and only love from himself. 

“Oh, Why?” You ask, reluctantly. You’re nearly prepared to get up and leave, hoping that his frustration isn’t at you as a person, or about what happened last week. 

“She hasn’t texted in a while and I’m starting to second guess some stuff, I guess.”

You look at him with a shocked expression, the guilt rising in you to the point that you very nearly start screaming out the secrets. But you don’t, because he continues. 

“You’re not wearing the stuff you usually wear to try and impress me either, so I feel like I may have lost my shot.”

Oh.

You look away, a confused feeling inside of you now. The guilt of the situation turning into that of petty revenge yet again. This is what you wanted. Him making a suggestion, even while in a relationship, to want you, to have you, to need you. 

“I want to kiss you, so bad.” He sighs out at your silence, flopping his head against the cushions of his couch and groaning in frustration. He squeezes his eyes shut, a face looking as though he was pained to say such a thing, but it’s more so just the frustration of wanting to kiss you, and never having the chance. Never being able to be in a position to do it. Never being the person you wanted to do it. 

“Are you going to do it this time?” You say in a small voice, still looking at him and the way he shows his clear intentions even through the slouched posture on the couch. 

The cushions are plush around his head, offering him a comfort that you assume you could never bring to him in a moment like this. Even when he turns his head to look at you, eyes darting across your face to search for your usual cheeky smirk or grin, and finding none of that. 

It’s the first time either of you have crossed the line of flirting. There is no flirting to be had here, and only Wonwoo’s reluctant intimacy, his needy suggestions. 

“Yeah.” He lets out with a sigh, now taking in a deep breath and still not moving from the couch. 

You, on the other hand, unintentionally push the secret to the back of your mind. The sheer idea of him wanting to kiss you, and him actually planning to do it overshadows any other thought in your brain. As if the entire situation never happened, and it’s just you and him with no ties to other people. 

As if he’s not in a relationship. As if you’re not actively trying to end that relationship. 

It’s silent, and he’s still unmoving after saying that. You look away briefly, trying to muster up the courage to say something else. To encourage him, to do it yourself. Then, before you can even try, you feel the couch dip next to you, and when you turn back to look at him. He’s right there.

You can feel his breath fanning over you, only now noticing that he must have been sucking on that candy before for this very reason. The scent of something fruity and sweet overpowering your senses as the two of you blink at each other. 

You watch as his eyes go from open, to hooded, and you feel his palm against your cheek. The warmth of it lulling your own eyes to close. 

The first feeling of his lips felt like any other kiss. Plush and warm. His lower lip slots between yours in a simple way, and he stays like that briefly before pulling back and looking at you.

His insides are buzzing, unsure as to why this feels so insane right now. He’s kissed before, so many times. He’s made out, he’s fucked. He’s done everything, but with you, it’s different. And it’s so fucking cliche to think about. Never did he think kissing you would feel any different. 

But it does. And maybe it’s because your lips are prettier than his girlfriend’s, maybe it’s because the candy he had made the kiss all the sweeter. Maybe it’s because you’re here, and she’s not. 

Or maybe, it’s because he actually likes you. 

It only continues from there, his lips falling to yours once more, and then twice more, until he’s managed to cup your face in both of his hands and really kiss you. His tongue slipping in with ease and not at all as reluctant as his hands. 

You kiss him back, seemingly trying to take what you can get before he realizes what’s happening and ultimately runs away from this. 

With each passing moment, it’s what you expect to happen but, for him, each passing moment is only going further and further past the boundary line. His tongue continues moving against yours, his lips continue to fit perfectly with yours, and he keeps going until he’s breathless. 

When he pulls back this time to breathe, his hands go from your face to your shoulders, running down your waist until he grips your hips and pulls you forward. You don’t budge at first, looking at him and his candy kissed lips. 

He seems confident when he pulls at you again, and again, until you follow where his hands are pulling you. Directly on top of him. 

There, he positions himself much like he did when he said he was going to kiss you. Head pressed back into the cushions, eyes closed before half-opening to look at you with a serious expression. Seeing him from this angle, with your legs thrown on either side of him, straddling him? 

That angry feeling inside of you bubbles up again. This is what your best friend can fucking have? And she’s not doing it? She’s not here right the fuck now, sitting on her pretty boyfriend? With his stupid warm hands holding her so delicately on his lap? With his messy hair and pretty lips?

You groan as you look at him, moving your hand to pinch the bridge of your nose and shake your head. 

“Hm? What’s up?” He asks, in his own little world with you, his girlfriend so far in the back of his brain that he doesn’t seem to comprehend the gravity of the situation. 

“I just,” You start, adjusting your eyes back to him and taking in his image once again. This time feeling like the breath is knocked out of you with the way he’s looking at you. You forgot what you wanted to say. 

“Are you worried?” He asks, bringing his hand back up to your face and running the back of his fingers against your lips.

It’s something that makes you feel like he’s not taken. It makes you feel like he wants to be taken though, by you, specifically. 

You shake your head, kissing his fingers as they continue to make their way back and forth across your lips. Only slightly sticking out your tongue to lick them, before he runs that hand to the collar of your shirt and pulls you down and against him. 

There, before you can even think to pull yourself back up, he’s wrapping his arms around you in a hug, letting your head lay against his shoulder as he talks. 

“You really have no idea, do you?”

On the fucking contrary. He’s the one who has no idea. 

“How long have I wanted to hold you like this?” He continues, still hugging you too tight for you to lift up enough to look at him. “Do you know?” 

You shake your head, digging deep in your brain and finding no hints from him that would indicate such a thing. 

“Since before you approached me to meet her.” He says, dropping the bomb that he’s still not yours, all while holding you as if you’re his. “Since that time you asked my friend for help on campus opening your bottle.” 

“That was over a year ago.” You comment in disbelief, noting that college life felt so far away despite it not being a distant memory at all. 

In fact, you remember the way he wanted to help before his friend did. You didn’t know him until that moment, and only knew his friend from a few classes.

“From the first second, I think,” He ponders, his grip on you loosening as he lets you raise up slightly to look at him. “I think this is what I wanted from then on.”

“Then why are you with–”

He cuts you off, kissing you again and ultimately doing the job of shutting your brain off so well that you can only believe he was meant to be the one doing it. 

And there, the two of you sit like that with no goal in mind. Just kissing, just feeling, just enjoying. With each breath you need to take, the kisses only come back more intense, up until you think a solid hour passes.

Never have you made out for this long without a hand in your pants, or your hand in someone else’s pants. Arguably, you feel as if you need your hand in his pants by now, especially because you can feel how aroused he’s been. 

He never pushed for more though, with his length sitting directly under you and his little relieved breaths each time you adjusted your body on his to kiss him deeper. You can imagine his legs must be going numb by now too, but he leaves no room for complaints. 

None of his little sounds seem to come from pain, and the fact that this alone is enough to satisfy him brings that angry feeling back. You can imagine he must love to go slow. He must enjoy taking his time, and being gentle, sweet, and loving. Your best friend is so fucking different. You’ve heard of her sexual endeavors, you’ve seen them both in photos, videos, and hell, even in the same room as you because the bitch has no comprehension of personal space. 

Only now do you realize that during her entire relationship with Wonwoo, she never talked about sex with him. She never sent photos, videos, or was all over him when the three of you hung out. You assumed it was because it was his boundary. You know she doesn’t respect boundaries though, so clearly not. 

“I don’t know.” Wonwoo suddenly whispers between kisses, forcing you to search your brain as to what he must be referring to. 

“Hm?” You hum into his insistent lips, only giving enough space for him to offer short bursts of conversation. 

“Why am I with her, that’s what you were going to ask, right?” He says, pulling back and letting you look at him. 

You nod reluctantly, trying not to feel his arousal beneath you twitch against your ass. 

He shrugs.

“Does it really even matter?” He asks, now moving his body in a way that suggests you should stand, and you do. 

You stay silent, watching him stand to his feet in front of you, looking down at you. 

“Does it?” He asks again, looking at you for an answer.

You shake your head, watching him slowly take a step back, and back, and back. Fully aware of the fact that he’s making his way to his room, and knowing you’re going to follow him.

You do, following him until you get close enough that he grabs you again and holds you against his chest, expertly walking backwards in his apartment straight to his bedroom door. You could do that too, if you wanted to, because you’ve been here more times than you can count. 

There, he continues to hold you in his grasp, inhaling the scent of your hair, running his hands down and slipping them under your shirt, rubbing your back.

You’re the one who snakes an arm around him to open his bedroom door, and he very nearly trips backwards. The chaos of you falling on top of him wouldn’t be the most awful error, with the way he keeps getting caught up with simply fucking hugging you. Thankfully though, he doesn’t fall.

Instead, he regains the control of his body and turns both of you around, now forcing you to walk back until your knees hit his bed and you’re falling back with him on top of you.

It’s silent again save for a small laugh from him, and he still just stares at you. As if he’s taking you in for the first time each time he does this. 

He pulls his arms from under you and adjusts them now to where one is holding up his weight, and the other is once again fiddling with the collar of your shirt. There, he leans down and kisses the side of your mouth before moving down your neck, stopping where his fingers are toying with your shirt. 

“I’m so hard,” He whispers against your neck, thrusting his hips forward and against your leg. “Can you touch me?” 

You pause at the feeling of your heart fluttering, the warmth of his breath against your skin only heightens the feeling and you intentionally lift your leg slightly to bump against his length. 

He lets out a pleased sigh at the feeling, tensing his hips against your leg and kissing against your neck again, beginning to suckle in that same spot. 

His hands move up and down your body as he chases the friction your leg offers, slowly lifting your shirt, up until he has to remove his lips from your skin to get it off of you, only to immediately place them right back there, and sucking harder against your collar bone. 

You feel his length throbbing against your leg with each little movement of his hips, and the pained feeling of your blood vessels being bursted with his mouth, the feeling of his hands now running up to your bra, intentionally moving the fabric just to free one of the breasts he’s spent too much time staring at before. 

When he does that, you feel him release your skin from his mouth and groan out at the first glimpse of real naked flash, now running his lips straight to your nipple and sucking there instead. His hips moving faster against you until he can barely stand it. 

He releases your nipple with a pop sound before looking at you, his eyes shining in a new way. He studies the way you lay beneath him, then looks down at his cock chasing the feeling of your slightly raised leg before he laughs at himself. Only slightly, a very small laugh. 

“I feel so desperate…” He comments, shifting his hips harder. “and I don’t care.” He adds, reaching for your bra and pulling it off of you without so much as unhooking it. Then he goes straight for his shirt, lifting it off of his body just a quickly before lying against you just to feel the warmth.

“Are you okay with this?” He finally says, in a smaller voice, with a little less confidence. 

Of course you are, even with all of the things unspoken about this situation, and what could come of it. 

You offer him a small nod, moving your hands up to his hair and pulling a bit, as if to guide his lips back to your nipple. He follows with ease, smiling around the hardened nub and flicking it with his tongue before immediately pulling back and looking at you. 

He’s fucking beaming. Never have you seen him look so happy. He’s practically glowing as he looks at you, and it makes you feel like your heart is going to thump out of your chest. You smile back, feeling like you both must look so stupid right now. He’s cheating right now, and you both couldn’t be happier about it. 

“You’re so…” You start, your voice coming out cheerful and pleased. “cute.”

He raises a questionable brow at the choice of words there, wanting nothing more than to seem sexy, or like, arousing to you. But he will take it at face value, and hope that someday, maybe he’ll be more than just cute.

He hums, leaning back down to your nipple yet again, suckling it between his teeth before finally moving over to the other, warming up the skin there and leaving no part of you without a tingling sensation. 

His hips have stilled, but you can still feel him ache against you, so you make it a point to raise your leg higher, moving it against him until he can’t stop releasing little moans from around your nipple. You keep doing that, up until he releases your skin with a deep sigh, one that feels painful.

“I want you so bad.” He groans, lifting fully from you and towering over you. 

You look up at him, eyes trailing his chest and abs before focusing on his hands, which lifts from you and travels to the button of his pants. 

It’s going to happen. It’s really gonna fucking happen now. You’re happy, your heart is fucking threatening death on you, and your entire body is reacting to him at this moment in the form of warmth soaking your panties. 

He watches you watch him, your eyes practically urging him to do exactly what he’s intending to do, and he’s even more happy to oblige. Making a show of unbuttoning his pants, unzipping, and then pausing. 

“Hey, look at me.” He says playfully, watching you struggle to move your eyes back up to his. “Keep looking at me.”

God, it truly is a fucking struggle to keep your eyes on his, despite how much you’ve grown to love how passionate they are when he looks at you. In your peripheral vision, you can see him lower his pants, you can see his hand reaching to pull his cock from his briefs, and you can even see him tug against it a few times, all while he’s smiling directly at you. Knowing you want to see it. 

“How does it feel to have someone flash what you want in front of you, but not being able to really look?” He asks, again in a playful voice.

You roll your eyes at him, then dart them straight down and take in a deep inhale at how big he appears to be. Even against his hands, large and slender, his cock is arguably something that will feel new to you in size alone. 

Honestly, you can’t fucking comprehend your “best friend” moving away and leaving that behind. Choosing someone else, letting someone else inside of her. Looking at it alone has your entire body in hyper-awareness of how badly you want it. You want him. Not even for revenge, but just to show him that he is fucking wanted. He is desired, and he isn’t worth fucking leaving. 

You’re still staring when he shuffles back, landing his hands on your pants to try and get them off of you too, but you stop him. Shooting up from your back and nearly throwing yourself into a dizzy fit before grabbing onto him and pushing him from the bed. 

He’s a little shocked, and definitely confused, until he realizes what you’re doing. You shift to lying on your stomach, face level with his hips.

“Oh,” He lets out, noting the way you’re grabbing his hips and bringing him forward again, his knees hitting his bed and the head of his cock hitting your lips. “Oh, shit.” He grits out, feeling you instantly take him into your mouth without even so much as suggesting you wanted to do this.

If there was a line to cross, it was already crossed, but this means there’s no turning back. And he’s fucking fine with it. His “girlfriend” never seemed this excited to do this. She was actually, um, quite boring in bed. Not to compare her to you or anything, it’s just, you know–

You can feel him tremble when you take him deeper into your mouth, honestly just wanting to show him how much you want this. You take him deeper, and deeper, until your throat constricts around him and you feel him tap at your shoulder and slide himself out. 

“You don’t have to do that,” He comments, slightly out of breath, a tint of red fanning over his cheeks. “You really, really, don’t have–” 

He’s cut off by you ignoring him, doing the exact thing that’s getting him to act like this. Taking more and more until your throat constricts again, and you continue to let your throat stimulate him. 

“Fuck.” He moans in another shaky breath, showing that he’s still trembling, much like you are. 

He doesn’t argue this time though, instead he opts to find out where the fuck he should put his hands. One lands on your head briefly, before it moves to your cheek to feel how hollowed out they are, then it ends up running through his hair, to amplify the feeling of pleasured insanity running through his body right now. 

And when you pull back to breathe, you feel his hips chase the warmth of your throat. Gagging you once more before he sputters out a small apology, heaving in a breath and trying to steady his thoughts of how fucking amazing you are. 

You smile at him, wiping the corners of your mouth before planting a kiss to the head of his length, tasting the salty pre-cum that you hadn’t gotten to taste before, considering how deep you took him into your mouth. 

He still looks at you, dazed and totally infatuated with the way you look so proud of yourself. His cock twitching in front of your face, his eyes keeping the same passion. Before you can even go back in for more, he’s reclaiming his control. 

“Roll over,” He says, not trying to seem demanding. 

To you though, it just seems desperate, in a good way. A great way. 

You do, rolling over and seeing him lean over you to quickly undo your pants, his cock literally right on your face. You playfully lick the base, feeling his entire body twitch as he laughs. 

“Stop.” He chuckles at his own sensitivity, trying to shove your pants down in the awkward position. 

“Don’t put it on my face then.” You argue, licking again. 

He finally steps back with another laugh, removing his length from the assault of your tongue and throwing himself onto the bed, finishing the task of taking off your pants. 

He briefly notes the wet spot on your panties, sighing in relief with a smile before he balances himself on one arm beside your head and leans down to kiss you.

You let him. Feeling entirely desired and wanted by him. The kiss is just as deep as the ones before, but this time you have the breath knocked out of you. You can feel his fingers moving your panties and going straight for your clit. 

Your mouth falls slack against his, letting out a sigh that he swallows up enthusiastically. 

He continues that, sliding his fingers up and down your folds, circling your clit, kissing you, chuckling to you, licking against your tongue before experimenting with sliding a finger into you.

He only stops kissing you at that moment, looking down at where his finger disappears inside of you, and then searching your face for a reaction. You look back at him with a dazed smile, slightly nodding with another long and drawn out sigh. 

Then he slides his finger out, and slides in two, a bit harsher this time. Effectively fucking his fingers into you only twice before you’re pulling him back down and into a rough and messy kiss.

His hand continues to fuck into you as his tongue counters the motion with slow drags of his tongue against yours, as if he’s tasting each moan you give to him. The candied flavor of his lips is more dull now that you think you’ve kissed the flavor out of him. You imagine he can feel exactly how much you want him, with the way you’re grasping him, the way you’re moaning for him, the way you’re kissing with no rhyme or reason. 

His hands get rougher and rougher as the minutes pass, up until he can feel you dripping against his knuckles and hopefully onto his bed. 

“So wet,” he compliments you through a breathy kiss. “So pretty.” He adds, pulling back to really see how you look while being fucked. 

You hum in response, spreading your legs a bit more, now using your own body to fuck against his fingers. Wanting more of him, wanting them deeper. 

“Wonwoo,” You sigh out, feeling the slide of his fingers continue to drench themselves into the heat of your pussy. “Please tell me you’re going to fuck me.” 

He continues to look at you, his cock twitching at the words as he dips his head in a small and, somehow shy, nod. All he needed was for you to ask. Now all he needs is to feel you stretch around his aching cock, relieving him of the intensity of how badly he’s wanted to be inside of you for so fucking long. 

“Just tell me when.” he whispers, letting his fingers continue to do the work. 

“Now.” 

Well, you don’t have to ask him twice. He smiles, popping one more kiss to the corner of your mouth before lifting from you and staring down at the way you slide yourself on his fingers. Imagining briefly what you’d look like doing that to his cock. Closing his eyes tightly at the image and nearly whining out in pleasure at the image. 

You’re a little shocked at first, with the way he pulls his fingers out, removes your panties, and instantly lays his cock against your core. Sliding it through your folds and humming at how wet you manage to coat his length. He does that for a little too long, but you watch him. He’s enjoying the image, staring straight down and seemingly focused on burning the image of his cock sliding against you in his mind. 

And when he does finally position himself, he’s quick to grab one of your legs and place it over one of his shoulders, before sliding in slightly, then doing the same with your other leg. 

There he stares down as he sinks into you, watching how deep his cock can go, feeling and seeing you pulse around him in a harsh and searing stretch. 

Then, he looks at you and the way you’re lying under him with a face that resembles both pain, release, and pleasure. It drives him further, fitting his cock into you as if it was made for you and you alone. 

You, on the other hand, feel as though you’re being split in fucking half by the sheer length of him. He just keeps pressing in, deeper, deeper, deeper. Until your legs tremble on his shoulders and he’s quick to turn his face to land a gentle kiss against your calf, as if to soothe you. 

He couldn’t stop even if he wanted to though. When he bottomed out on you, all he could do was sit there and feel your pussy adjust to him. It felt so fucking good, so tight, so wet. All of it had him nearly not even thinking with his own brain. It made him want to say filthy things, seeing you stretched out on him, feeling your legs tremble even through his soothing kisses. Seeing your hands weakly grip at the sheets above your head. 

Only now, does he slide out to offer you a bit of relief, watching your face and the way you take in deep breaths before releasing them with sweet sounds for him. He slides back in, letting out his own moan before gripping one of your legs to hold it in place and holding your thigh with the other. There, he finds a rhythm. One that has you moaning with each thrust, out of breath, and your legs trembling even more.

One that has him feeling like he could do this for hours. Loving the way he fits into you, loving the way your tits move with each thrust, obsessed with the way your voice translates pleasure for him. 

He thinks he might be in love, fucking into you as if his life depends on it. As if his “girlfriend” never laid under him like this. Because she did, and somehow it never felt as good as it does with you. 

Even through the silence save for moaning and breaths, it feels more intense than fucking ever has for him and he doesn’t want it to end. He loves the way your pleasure squeezes his length so tightly. He loves the little sounds you make, and fucking adores the way you still try to meet him half way with his thrusts. Like you’re urging for more, like you’re loving it, like you’re loving him. 

He does this for a while, internally falling in love with you over and over again with each moan, each clench of your pussy, each fucking tremble. That is only heightened when he manages to move a hand to your clit, fighting your weak hands to push them away from you as he stimulates the sensitivity beyond belief.

You moan out for him, both chasing the feeling and urging him to stop because you don’t want this to end either. He chooses to keep going though, watching you reach your arms up to him, as if you’re calling to him through the intense sensitivity. 

He’s so quick to let your legs fall from his shoulders as he intertwines his fingers with yours on one hand, the other keeping up the pressure against your clit. He leans closer to you now, face inches from your as he looks at you

“You’re so fucking pretty like this.” He compliments directly against your lips. “It isn’t fair.”

You can hardly comprehend what he’s saying, feeling his hips pick up intensity now that he’s even closer to you. The angle change makes the slide of his cock feel perfect inside of you, bumping every sensitive spot alongside his fingers caressing your clit, it sends you over edge without so much as a silent warning.

Honestly, it happens before he even realizes it himself. Feeling your pussy stutter around his length and the way you hold your breath as you try to kiss him at the same time. He tries to slow down to feel it, encouraging you to let it go while feeding into the one sided kiss. His fingers are still toying with you, wanting you to give him your all as you release. As he slows his hips, the slow drag of his cock inside of you continues to fuck you through your orgasm until he stops moving completely, unaware of how much you’re stimulating him through your orgasm, he pulls out half way in a panic.

“Hold on–” He breathes against your lips before throwing his head back and trying to convince himself not to come. “Stop clenching, fuck.” 

You could argue, but honestly you’re about as stupid as he appears to be right now. Clenching harder at his words and the way his body jerks inside of you as he presses all the way back in again. Prolonging your orgasm past your own comprehension. 

You moan louder in surprise, and there he goes. 

Losing his goddamn mind inside of you as he releases, almost forgetting where he is as he pumps every single bit of his come into you with full fucking intention. Wanting you to feel it as he kisses you through it, wanting you to know just how much he could give to you, and ultimately feeling satisfied with the way you cling to him as he does it. 

Up until both of you are breathless, trembling, and a fucking mess when he pulls out of you. 

~

The silence in the room came back after the two of you caught your breath, Wonwoo was quick to clean both of you up, knowing for a fact that a shower will need to be in the plan within the next ten minutes. 

But also, something else has come back to the front of his brain. Since, you know, he kind of lost his mind for a while there.

“Why didn’t you tell me she was cheating on me?”

“How did you–” You start, immediately pulled out of your post-sex daze. The glow of your skin disappearing and replacing itself with guilt and panic.

“When I asked her, she asked if you told me.” He responds, as nonchalant as ever. Showing no anger toward you for knowing. 

It seems he figured it out on his own.

“Oh….”

“You could have just told me instead of letting me sit there and suffer abouting wanting you at the same time. Do you realize how awful that made me feel?”

You’re not prepared for this conversation, as much as you’d like to be. 

“I was trying to get back at her.” You say in a small voice, feeling ashamed. 

“Well, we definitely did.” He starts, tapping the bottom of your chin and forcing you to look up at him. “You should have told me though, instead of trying to take matters into your own hands.”

You look at him, searching for any hint of anger or disappointment and finding none. If anything, you see the frustration, possibly part of what he referred to before he fucked you. Before he definitely didn’t cheat on his “girlfriend” with you.

“We did?” You start, glancing away from him. “She knows we–?” You continue, wondering how the fuck the two of you would have gotten back at her if you only just had sex. 

“Oh, right.” He puts a finger in the air. “I kind of jumped the gun and told her not to feel bad because I cheated on her too.” 

“What?! With who?” You panic, wondering if the silence of last week was him fucking the sad out of him with someone else.

“You.”  he pauses, avoiding eye contact. “Then I hung up and waited a few days to decide on what to do. I ended up texting you to come over so I could make good on my promise.”

“And if I wasn’t interested?”

“You were clearly interested.”

#wonwoo smut #svt smut #seventeen smut #jeon wonwoo smut

[merakiui]

PLEASE. please. if you would be so kind to give us some more stalker ex scara... the first time I saw it it just changed my brain chemistry, and I desperately need more </3

>:D thinking a lot about stalker ex Scara, but you get really drunk and he's the only one left to look after you......

(cw: yandere, nsfw, non-con, alcohol/intoxication, toxic ex scara, modern college au, connected to the previous stalker ex scara concept)

Just,,, the fact that he's been so good and sweet ever since he casually slid himself into your friend group and you're not sure if you can trust him, yet here you are being completely, utterly, stupidly vulnerable in front of your very unstable ex. orz

Kuni's not one for parties; in fact, he'd much rather spend his precious time doing quiet, comfortable things with you (cuddling is so much healthier than drinking, after all! <3). Unfortunately, you allow your foolish friends to talk you into attending these brain-rotting parties so you can get drunk off your ass, and he can't let you attend them by yourself because there are too many risks. If you got too comfortable with Venti or Kazuha or even Tighnari while drunk, Kuni would never forgive you. >:( he's worked too hard cultivating this friendly image for himself, and he isn't going to let you or anyone else ruin it.

But right now everyone else is too inebriated to do much of anything, and he hasn't touched the drinks ever since he arrived, instead choosing to anchor himself to some forgotten corner of the room. He sulks and broods in silence, a scowl plastered to his face. He's just barely tolerating it for your sake. It's because he loves you that he's doing any of this. Soon you won't even need any of these troublesome friends. Soon you'll just have him, and he's all you really need. It was like that when you were growing up, after all. Even though, as painful as it is, you don't seem so codependent, so swept up in romance... You're so independent now, no longer the shy, fearful thing from the final few months of your relationship with him. He'd be impressed if he wasn't trying so hard to isolate you from each of your friends. It's a challenge when he's trying to tiptoe around Heizou's sharp, witty perception or Venti's proclivity for knowing everything about everyone despite no one knowing much about him.

But he endures. He's gone years without you; this is nothing.

If you were smarter, you'd know not to trust a word he says. That kind, soft smile he's perfected for this act is not to be believed, especially not when he's using it to assure your friends that he'll bring you home safe and sound. Heizou has his doubts because it's late and you can hardly walk a straight line, but he's tipsy just like the others and it's hard to deliberate like this. Besides, when has Kuni ever let the group down? :)

He takes you back to his dorm instead because Albedo's not home and he has the entire room to himself. While you meander clumsily over to his bed, kicking your shoes off and shucking your jacket in the process, he watches. You have no idea how much he depends on you, how much he admires you, so much so that it surpasses love and lust entirely. Without you, he's nothing. Or that's what he thinks because for the majority of his life he's felt empty and sub-human and so alone. But now you're here, and you can fill those empty spaces in his heart and give him a reason to keep living.

You don't seem particularly fazed when the bed dips under his weight. Rather, you blink sleepily up at him when he leans over you, gingerly reaching to help you out of your sweater. You're too drunk to protest or struggle, and you feel so dizzy every time you open your eyes. It's difficult to remain fully conscious when sleep is tugging at your body, pulling you under. You don't even realize he's fit his mouth on yours until his tongue is pushing past your lips. You manage to place your hands against his chest, intending to push him away, but you're so exhausted and tired. They fall to your sides, useless.

Kuni sits up and smiles at you. He says something about you being dumb and cute... or something about how your friends are fools. You don't really catch all of his obsessive murmurings when your attention is waning. Clothes are torn off; he kisses you a lot. You're not sure if you're reciprocating, but it certainly sounds that way when you're whining beneath him, arching against sodden sheets, your breaths coming in pants and huffs each time he ruts into you.

He doesn't have to worry about anything. Right now, it's just you and him in a corner of the world, locked away from everyone who might try to take you away from him. It's not like you'll remember much come morning. You don't need to anyway. It's better if you're lost and bewildered. That way he'll be able to craft a story to suit his fancy. You'll believe it. You'll have no choice, and Kuni knows how to tell very believable tales.

#genshin chit chat #astolfofo #yandere scaramouche #tw: noncon #n/sfw #omg wait....... what if you're best friends with furina and scara feels so threatened because all of your friends are male #(heizou venti kazuha tighnari etc) #but now you have furina who seems to cling to you and it rubs scara the wrong way and and and!!!!! #orz i need to write for furina she's so beloved <3 #(with a fem reader) furina's sapphic yearning versus scara's obsessive pining........... #OH NO AND LYNEY....... the mouchey and lyney rivalry T_T #AAAAAA or furina x reader x arlecchino........ #so many thoughts are written here and they're scrambled please forgive me >_<

[junkissed]

happy ending

member — husband!junhui x f reader genre — angst, fluff, hurt/comfort word count — 6.6k synopsis — a pointless argument escalates until both of you need some space, but it couldn't come at a worse time. warnings — female reader, planned pregnancy, there's a big argument but i tried to not make it too toxic (jun and reader have a happy & healthy relationship i promise), swearing, there is a happy ending lots of fluff !! notes — requested by anon — this has been sitting in my drafts for months bc every time i look at it i get shy and wanna change my mind but i'm proud of how this turned out so i'm posting it finally! i know pregnancy fics aren't everyone's favorite but this was honestly very comforting to write so i hope anyone who chooses to read can find comfort in it as well <3 also the last time i proofread this was like april and if i try to proofread it rn i'll get shy again and chicken out so if there's any mistakes pls ignore! i hope you enjoy :)

you sat on the bathroom floor, trying to comprehend the weight of the news you held in your hand. you couldn’t believe it. you could? you couldn’t. 

after many months of trying to start a family with your husband, you had finally succeeded. the slim plastic stick with two tiny pink lines was the last piece of evidence you needed. it had been months of carefully tracked cycles, fertility doctors, and new positions that seemed too weird to actually do anything. but now, everything was finally falling into place.

you don’t know exactly how much time you spend sitting on the floor and staring at the pregnancy test; thinking, planning, and thinking some more. but when you finally stand up and place the positive test on the counter with shaking hands, it still hasn’t fully sunk in yet what’s happening. something you’d wanted for so long, and finally it was all right in front of you.

what do you do now? no— you know exactly what you need to do, and it’s a long list of things. the real question is, where do you begin?

you thought back to all the videos you’d watched over the last few weeks. somehow every social media algorithm knew exactly what you wanted to see, and it had given it to you in abundance; baby showers, gender reveals, those “get ready with me - new mom edition” videos. all getting your hopes up before you could confirm whether or not it had finally happened.

with your hopes high and expectations even higher, you were already beginning to plan how you would break the news to junhui. as your husband and your soon-to-be baby’s father, of course you wanted him to be the very first person to know, so you couldn’t wait too long to tell him. you couldn’t wait to see the look on his face.

maybe you’d get a little gift box and give the test to him before dinner. but, then again, it was literally a piece of plastic you’d peed on. surely you could give him… something a little nicer than that.

maybe you could buy a baby outfit and wrap it up for him. but you remembered he’d mentioned so many times about how excited he would be to pick out clothes once you got pregnant. you would want him to have the honor of picking out the very first one, going to the store together and looking through the whole section before finally settling on the perfect one.

what else was there you could do? bake a cake? make a crossword puzzle? buy him a t-shirt that says “dad-to-be”? so many ways you could do it, but none of them seemed perfectly right.

from the other room you hear the door opening, and hurriedly you stuff the test into a drawer, not wanting to tell him just yet. you need a plan first; waiting another day or two couldn’t hurt, so you’ll just have to figure out how to tell him later.

you flip off the bathroom light and stride into the hallway, barely able to contain the grin on your face. you’ve always been terrible at keeping secrets, and with news as big and exciting as this you have no idea how you’re going to be able to hide it from him for more than a minute.

but luckily you don’t have to wonder about it for long, because as soon as you see jun you can already tell he’s in a sour mood. 

you know it’s usually best to let him have some time alone when he’s upset, but not for too long because he starts getting frustrated with himself and won’t stop working until he’s exhausted.

but you’re still on a high after everything today, so you decide on being a little bit sweeter to him in the hopes that your happiness will be contagious and that it’ll lift his spirits, despite what was probably a really awful day at work.

you find him sitting at the kitchen table with his head in his hands, long fingers pressed against his eyes trying to block out the light.

“hey, junnie,” you call out, sitting down in a chair next to him. “bad day?”

“yeah,” he answers shortly.

“i’m sorry, baby,” you hum, putting your hand on his shoulder, but he flinches and your hand falls away in surprise. he’s never done that before. weird. you try something else. “um, any requests for dinner?”

“not hungry.”

“alright. well, i guess i can cook up some veggies and leave them out, you can heat them up whenever you get hungry.”

he moves his hands away from his face and onto the table, sighing as he leans back in his chair. “can you just— leave me alone for a while? i’m sorry.”

you nod and stand up. “no, it’s fine. i get it. i’ll bring you some tea later then, maybe. text me when you’re feeling better.” you reach out and gently touch his hand before walking away, leaving him alone at the table.

it’s definitely one of his worser days, you note, so you retreat to your bedroom to watch more videos on your phone, trying to bring back your excitement from earlier. hopefully later he’ll be more open and you can sit down and eat something, and maybe by then you’ll have come up with a good way to tell him the news.

an hour passes and you come out of your bedroom to look for jun, having a question from one of your friends about the dinner you’d arranged to have together next week. but he’s no longer in the kitchen, so you peek your head into his office room and find him exactly where you expect him to be, trying to work himself to death.

you clear your throat before you enter, not wanting to startle him again. “hey, junnie, i know you’re in a bad mood, and i’m sorry to interrupt, but—”

“what do you want?” he snaps, never turning around from his desk. just from the way he’s hunched over his computer, he looks like the most stressed you’ve ever seen him, and your chest tightens with worry before your brain registers what he’s just said to you.

“i— excuse me?”

“i said, what do you want?” he repeats, still facing away from you.

you resist the urge to glare at him, knowing he’s probably under a lot of pressure, and you aren’t trying to add to it. “you don’t have to be rude, jun. i just came in here to double check about next weekend, minghao’s texting me.”

he finally lifts his head, slamming his hand down on the desk. “i’m really trying not to snap at you, but— jesus, you make it so fucking hard sometimes.”

you raise your eyebrows in disbelief, your voice lifting in tone. “well, i’m so very sorry to inconvenience you then, but i really don’t appreciate you talking to me like that, jun.”

“and i don’t appreciate you talking to me like i’m a child! when will you get it through your head?”

his comment stings, but you brush it off. “well, maybe if you’d just talk to me like an adult instead of throwing a fit and hiding in your office then i wouldn’t have to treat you like one!” you’re starting to get tired of how he retreats in on himself every time bad shit happens. all you want to do is let him know he doesn’t have to do it alone, and he’s just… exploding at you for no reason, so you don’t try to hide the snarkiness behind your words.

he scoffs angrily and stands up, towering over you at his full height. “oh, grow up! you’re so moody all the time and you expect me to just put up with it! as if i don’t have enough other shit to worry about, i have to worry about what you think of this and that and everything all the damn time!”

you’ve never seen him get so angry like this, and it’s almost scary how completely different this jun is from the jun you know and love. “okay, jun, fine, i’ll just—”

“no, don’t fucking “jun, fine” me. it’s like you’re doing it on purpose at this point, you act like everything is just so perfect and then when it’s not you act like it’s your job to fix everything! you can’t fix everything!”

“i said fine! just forget it, i’ll leave you the hell alone like you always want!”

he pushes past you and crosses the room in two strides, grabbing his keys off the hook by the door, his hand already on the doorknob. “i need to get some air. i’ll be back later.”

you fold your arms over your chest, trying to look unphased but inside your heart is breaking. “you’re really gonna walk out like that? you’re just gonna run away from this? real mature, junhui.”

he spins around, and the look in his eyes is cold. “if i don’t get out of this house right now i’m gonna say something i actually regret.”

and in a flash the door is slammed shut and jun is gone. you can hear his car starting up in the driveway, and seconds later everything is dead silent.

you stand frozen in front of the door, unable to move. you can’t believe it. you can’t. what just happened?

jun has never just… walked out like that.

his words ring in your ears; though your argument wasn’t very long, a lot was said in a very short time and you can’t even begin to think about how to process it as it starts to hit you all at once.

say something he actually regrets? what the hell does that mean? so he’s saying he doesn’t regret everything else, the cursing and the anger and the pointed words that were clearly meant to hurt you?

minute after long minute passes and you realize he’s not coming back anytime soon. finally you drag yourself away from the door, dropping down on the couch in a daze.

there’s never been a time where you and jun haven’t made up immediately after an argument. sure, maybe you take a little bit to cool down in your own space, but neither of you like letting the tension sit unresolved for very long. so what was it this time that made him leave without even a goodbye?

so many reasons, so many excuses, so many words you could’ve said instead. you shouldn’t have reacted like that, you shouldn’t have kept it going, you should’ve just left him alone. would that have made him stay? if you’d backed down sooner and just let him work through it on his own?

despite all the what-ifs and the doubts in your mind, your conscience won’t allow you to let him worry about everything by himself without at least offering your help. you’re a team, husband and wife, and you’ll be damned if you let him forget that. maybe you trying to help actually made things worse in the end, but at least you know you tried… right?

it’s not until you check your phone and realize that jun’s been gone more than half an hour that you finally let yourself cry. you’d been so focused on worrying about where jun was and whether he was okay that you’d barely even thought about what might happen after this.

will he just… come back and pretend nothing happened? will he come back and still be angry at you? it would almost be worse if he was calm and acted like everything was normal. would he even apologize? would you even apologize? of course you would. both of you said things that were fucked up, and you’ll be the first to admit it if it means this whole thing can be over. right now all you want is to have junhui back.

the tears keep falling but you don’t even feel yourself crying, your face rigid as the tears continue to stain your cheeks.

after an hour you force yourself to get up off the couch and move somewhere, anywhere around the house to try and get your mind off things. but you can’t erase his voice from your head, the look in his eyes as he walked out the door and the way his shoulders hunched from anger mixed with exhaustion.

you find yourself back in your bedroom and you fall onto his side of the bed, wishing you would wake up to find that this has all just been a very bad dream.

it’s after 10pm when you hear your phone buzz on the nightstand and you sit up in a panic, scrambling to see if it’s something from jun. your eyes sting from crying so much, and you blink away the remaining tears as you unlock your phone with shaking hands. your heart drops even further when you realize it is, in fact, from jun, but not the news you want to hear.

you let your phone slip out of your grasp, tumbling to the carpet with a thud. when he’d said he’d be back later you had assumed that meant he’d be coming back tonight. clearly you thought wrong.

tomorrow seemed so far away; too much time to spend alone in a house that was supposed to be filled with happy memories, but now all you felt was pain. you felt it in your chest and in your stomach and in your head and everywhere. the whole room was suffocating, heavy weight crushing down on you from every angle.

you slide to the floor and pick up your phone. you don’t text junhui back. you’re not sure anymore if he’d even read your message. 

instead you type in your friend seokmin’s phone number, listening to the line ring as you wipe the back of your hand across your eyes.

as soon as he picks up, he can hear the anguish in your voice and he’s begging you to tell him what’s wrong, but all you can muster up is a soft, “can i stay with you tonight?” because you can’t bear to be in this house another second without junhui. 

and of course he says yes, and of course he’s immediately on his way over to pick you up. and of course he stops at mcdonald’s on the way back to his house to buy you something to eat, because you haven’t eaten and even though you don’t particularly have much of an appetite right now, seokmin would rather die than let you skip a meal, especially on a night like tonight when you could really use something to keep you going.

you throw your overnight bag on the floor of seokmin’s living room with a small sigh. in a haze you’d tossed in whatever items you thought you might need; a toothbrush, pajamas, something to wash your face with. 

he gives you space for a while as he pulls out the folding bed part of the couch and brings out blankets and pillows for you to sleep with. you don’t say it, but you really appreciate his help. he’s been one of your best friends for so long, and you don’t know what you’d do without him. 

you hadn’t thought about it while you were packing, but as you stand in seokmin’s bathroom you think about the cleanser you’d grabbed; your favorite one, the one jun had gotten you for your birthday last year and you’d never switched to another brand since. 

every single thing reminds you of him, and you push down a fresh wave of emotion as you scrub the foam into your skin, trying to wash away all your tears.

when you’re done getting ready for bed you find seokmin in the living room with a pot of tea. he was just trying to help, but unluckily for him, he’d made green tea. it was your favorite… but it also happened to be jun’s favorite.

and this time you can’t hold back your tears, and seokmin is sitting wide eyed and bewildered, wondering why you’re crying over tea, but he doesn’t ask. he just reaches out to let you hug him, and you squeeze him so tightly you know it must hurt, but he doesn’t say anything, just lets you hug him as hard as you can and lets your tears stain his t-shirt.

it takes another half hour for you to calm down enough to talk. you’d spent the time watching whatever was on tv, not really paying attention and instead playing everything back in your mind. seokmin had just sat next to you, quietly keeping you company until you were ready.

“jun and i… had a fight,” you say finally, interrupting the commercial playing on the screen.

“i figured,” he says, offering you a comforting smile as he mutes the tv. “do you wanna talk about it?”

“i don’t know. there’s not much to talk about.” you take a shaky breath, remembering it all one more time. “we both said some awful things that we didn’t mean. at least, i know i didn’t mean them. then he just… left, and he texted that he’d come home tomorrow. that’s it.”

you don’t tell him about the pregnancy test. you’ve mentioned once or twice that you and jun had been interested in starting a family, but you’d never gone into detail about it and you weren’t going to now. you still wanted jun to be the first person to know, even though you didn’t know when that might be anymore.

you tell him about other things instead, about your day at work and your plans for the weekend. eventually you finish your tea, and seokmin retreats to his own room and shuts the door with a quiet click, leaving you alone in the quiet of his living room.

it takes you a long time to fall asleep, but soon your exhaustion catches up with you and you let yourself rest, physically and emotionally drained. at least the silence here isn’t as bad as the silence at your house.

across town in his friend seungcheol’s guest bedroom, jun can’t stop tossing and turning. he’s fucked up, he knows he fucked up, big time.

why did he leave? he shouldn’t have left. you had been absolutely right, he was running away from everything and it was stupid and dumb and immature. but in that moment all he could think about was what the next awful thing he might say to you was, and he knew if he had stayed for any longer he wouldn’t have been able to stop what came out of his mouth. he was out of control, and immediately he knew it.

not even the worst day in the world could make you deserving of all the things he said to you. you were the only thing that wasn’t bad in his life; even on shitty days like today, all you did was care about him. and all he did was hurt you.

jun barely sleeps that night, finally forcing himself out of the extra bed at dawn. he’d been too anxious to sleep, too frustrated with himself to do anything other than think about everything he did and wonder if you were okay without him.

he’d already gotten an earful from his friend last night, and he knew he was still in big trouble. the things he said wouldn’t just go away overnight. in fact, they’d probably gotten worse by leaving them to build up overnight, and again he’s kicking himself for ever leaving in the first place.

he packs up his things as quickly as he can, eager to get home and see you again. on his way out the door, he thanks seungcheol for letting him stay the night and he apologizes for bothering him so late.

“i’m not the one you need to apologize to. you better figure out how to fix this, jun.”

with a straight face he nods, bowing his head as he closes the door.

in his car, jun takes the long way home, trying to find an open grocery store. he knows it won’t make up for how he acted, but the very least he can do it buy you a bouquet of your favorite flowers.

he walks through the aisles, basket in hand, trying to think of something else for you. maybe he’ll get the ingredients he needs to make your favorite dinner tonight; he hadn’t eaten last night, though you had offered to cook for him and he’d shot you down.

he feels another pang of guilt at the thought, remembering yet another kind gesture you’d tried to give him that he’d brushed off like it meant nothing. it meant everything to him, and in the middle of the frozen vegetables aisle he swore he wouldn’t ever do it again. 

he’d taken you for granted, and he was so lucky that things hadn’t ended worse than they did. he could’ve said something truly unforgivable, or he could’ve even lost your relationship altogether. but he was still yours, and you were still his, and he would just have to work extra hard to make sure you knew how sincere he was.

he’d been a little worried that you hadn’t texted him back last night, seeing that you’d read his message but never responded. you were probably still hurt, and he didn’t blame you; still, he’d hoped you would say something back.

with grocery bags loaded full of ingredients for dinner and the special things he’d bought for you, the drive back home feels a little more hopeful.

he plans out everything he’ll do in the car. he’ll bring the groceries in and put them away quickly; it’s still fairly early in the morning, so hopefully you won’t be awake yet. he’ll arrange your flowers all nice in a pretty vase, and he’ll come in and wake you up with the best apology of his life and hopefully a really big hug. after the last 24 hours he really could use a hug, and he’s sure you could too. and then he’ll explain how sorry he is and how he didn’t mean any of it and then everything will be better again. yes, everything will be okay.

the first part of his plan goes perfectly. he sneaks into the house and when he’s met with silence he continues putting everything away, quietly so he won’t wake you up in the other room. then, he puts the flowers in a vase and with everything in place, he walks down the hallway to finally face you.

but when he twists the bedroom door handle, the bed is made and the room is empty. you aren’t there.

he frowns, leaving the room and poking his head into the bathroom, then his office. he calls your name loudly, hoping you’re just in a corner of the house and you’ll come out once you hear him. but no reply.

he goes back into the living room and sets the vase down on the coffee table, trying to think. you aren’t usually up this early, but maybe you hadn’t been able to sleep and you’d gone out for a walk, or maybe you’d gone to the store to get more cereal? 

a sinking feeling rises in his chest, and he walks back into the bedroom to confirm something, sliding open the closet door to check. your overnight duffel bag is gone.

he ducks back into the bathroom to check something else. your toothbrush isn’t sitting in the jar like it usually is. he slides open the bathroom drawer to check one more thing, and—

his hand freezes on the knob, staring at something in the drawer that wasn’t there before. he’s not sure it is what he thinks it is, but either way there it is, clear as day in front of him: a little white piece of plastic, sticking out from underneath a tissue. 

gingerly he pulls it out, holding it up to the light to see it better. when he sees the two pink lines he nearly drops it in shock, but he stops himself, setting it gently on the counter instead.

this is something special, something precious, and he knew he had to take care of it. you’d saved it for a reason; you could’ve easily just thrown it away once you knew the results, but you had kept it instead. were you going to give it to him?

he covers his mouth with his hand, still staring at the stick sitting on the edge of the sink. it was just a cheap piece of plastic, but to him it was the most important thing in the entire world.

he deflates when he realizes you’d probably been planning on telling him last night, before he’d blown up at you. if he’d been paying attention to anyone other than himself, he would’ve noticed your mood was happier than usual, your face glowing with contained excitement. he should’ve been paying attention.

there’s a sense of urgency in his stride as he dashes around the house, looking for any other sign of you, but it’s clear you weren’t there. there were so many places you could be, he can’t even begin to think of where to look. your parents, friends, family; hell, you could even have stayed in a hotel, alone and upset. he should’ve been there. none of this should’ve ever happened.

immediately he presses the speed dial for your phone, but of course– no answer. he calls again, and again you don’t pick up. he curses, resisting the urge to slam his phone down on the table in frustration. no, he has to stay calm. that’s what got him into this whole fucking mess in the first place.

he remembers that your parents are out of town on vacation, so you probably wouldn’t have gone there. you wouldn’t have gone to a hotel because you always lecture him about the importance of saving money “just in case”, so you wouldn’t have paid to stay somewhere. your sister is still in college and shares an apartment with three other people, so probably not the best idea either. 

that narrows it down to one of your friends’ houses; seokmin, who lives a couple blocks away, or joshua, who lives on the other side of town.

he figures seokmin is his best bet, so jun takes a deep breath and finds the contact in his phone.

“what do you want?” seokmin’s usually cheery voice has an edge to it today, and jun knows he’s picked right.

“is she there?” he asks anxiously.

“she is,” he confirms, and jun exhales, letting out the breath he had been holding in. “but she’s asleep still. i’ll let her know you called.”

“wait,” jun adds quickly.

the line is silent for a moment, and he’s afraid seokmin’s already hung up, but finally he gets a response. “what is it?”

"can i–are you sure? please," jun pleads. if he could just talk to you, just explain what happened and that he's so fucking sorry—

“hold on,” seokmin says, and the phone goes quiet again.

jun’s heart is in his throat as he waits for a response, and he stops when he finally hears your voice. “hello?”

he breathes a sigh of relief. “sweetheart. i’m so sorry.”

you don’t reply, so he continues.

“i’m glad you’re okay,” he starts, trying to put the right words together. “i shouldn’t have said any of that last night, and i shouldn’t have left. i didn’t mean it. i’m sorry.”

“thanks” is all you say, and he hates how small and sad your voice sounds. it’s his fault you sound like that.

“i found your test,” he bursts out, unable to hide his excitement any longer.

“oh." you pause, swallowing. "so… you know.”

“yes, i do know, baby. i’m so sorry, if i had known before—”

you cut him off, your tone suddenly rising with anger. “‘if you had known?’ so you won’t yell at me if i’m pregnant, but you’re just fine with yelling at me when you think i’m not? is that the only reason why you’re even apologizing to me right now?"

“no— fuck, no, of course not. i shouldn’t yell at you, period. and i’m not going to ever again.” jun pauses for a second, rubbing his hand over his eyes. he’s done nothing so far but make everything worse. “i really messed up, honey, and i’m sorry. i can’t say it enough. but— please, come home. i don’t want to talk over the phone.”

you squeeze your eyes shut, trying to will away the tears that threaten to fall again. you don’t want to cry about this anymore. “okay,” you say finally. “i’ll be home in a little while.”

“thank you,” jun says, and the way his voice breaks makes your heart sink. you can tell he feels awful about everything, and you do really, really miss him.

“…i love you," you add, changing your mind at the last second.

“i love you, too!” he says immediately. “i love you, too, honey. text me when you’re on your way.”

“i will.”

he says “i love you” twice more before you end the call. you sit in silence for a second, processing everything before you stand up off the couch and head to seokmin’s room to give him back his phone.

"can you take me home now, please?" you tell him softly, and immediately seokmin stands up and hugs you, his arms wrapped tightly around you.

"of course. let me know when you're ready."

half an hour later you find yourself in the front seat of seokmin’s car once again, this time sitting nervously in his driveway as he puts your bag in the trunk for you. you're still not sure if you're ready to face jun yet, but you know you have to.

reluctantly you unlock your phone and open your text messages with jun, your eyes landing on the text he'd sent last night that had gone unreplied. with shaky fingers you type out that you're leaving seokmin’s house, and jun replies almost instantly with a long string of heart emojis.

seokmin gets into the car and starts it, and you exhale and set your phone in the cupholder.

"are you okay?" he asks, turning to look at you. "because you can always let me know if you need anything. anytime, day or night."

"i'm alright," you say, taking a deep breath. "i'm fine. but thank you, seok. i really appreciate everything."

he smiles, shifting the car into reverse. "of course. it's no problem at all."

the second he hears the car pull up outside the house, jun jumps up off the couch, smoothing his shirt down anxiously. through the window he watches seokmin hand you your bag and close the trunk, giving you one last hug before he gets back in the car. he doesn't drive away until you're at the front porch, and with a deep breath jun swings open the door, before you can even knock.

you both stand there in silence for a second before he blurts out another apology. "i'm sorry," he rushes to say. "i'm really sorry."

you give him a weak smile. "can i maybe… get in the house, first?" you ask quietly, motioning with your free hand at the doorway.

"yeah, i— yeah, shit, of course," jun says as he practically jumps out of your way, holding the door open for you to walk inside.

you set your bag on the floor by the couch as he closes the door behind you. the sound of the lock clicking seems too loud in the uncomfortable silence that settles over the room.

"can… can i give you a hug? please?" he asks, and you stay quiet but nod. 

he closes the distance between you in one stride and wraps his arms around you, squeezing you so tightly and holding you close to his chest. "i'm so sorry, honey. i didn't mean any of it. i promise."

"i believe you," you finally manage, your voice a little muffled from how he's pressing you against him.

he doesn't say anything more, just holds you and holds you, and it feels so good to be home where you belong. there's a lot that needs to be said, but for right now you don't need any more words. you're just glad to be back together again.

after a while you pull your head away from him so you speak. "i'm sorry."

"why are you apologizing? you didn't do anything wrong, baby. i'm the one that needs to be apologizing."

you shake your head. "no. i said some things last night, too. granted, not as bad as you, but…"

jun breaks out into a grin at your joke, and you feel your mood start to lighten. "…which is true. and i'm sorry."

"jun, you can stop apologizing now. i get it, you're sorry. you don't have to tell me a million times," you say, trying to laugh a little.

now it's his turn to shake his head. "well, i'm going to anyway. because i am sorry." you look away from him, feeling embarrassment start to boil up, but he continues talking. "i'm serious. i'll say it as many times as it takes to make it right."

you turn your head back to him, struggling to keep a straight face. "why did you leave, jun?" you ask softly.

he takes a deep breath, and still trapped in his arms you can feel his chest expand with the breath. 

"it was stupid," he says finally. "i left because i didn't want to stay and risk hurting you more. but i realize i did that anyway, by leaving. i was just… i needed some air. but i shouldn't have stayed away, and i'm not gonna do that again. i won't do it, ever again."

"i just don't want you to leave me," you manage, trying and failing to hide the crack in your voice as you feel your eyes start to well up with tears.

he hugs you tighter and one of his hands comes up to cup the back of your head, gently smoothing your hair with his thumb. "i know, baby, i'm sorry. i'm not going to, i promise."

you don't respond, but you know he's telling the truth. the last 24 hours have been hell for the both of you, and you don't doubt he means every single "i'm sorry" he's said.

"so…" jun starts, and you tilt your head up at him.

"so?" you know what he's going to say next, and despite the excitement you had yesterday you feel yourself dreading this part of the conversation.

"you're pregnant?"

you sigh, looking down and avoiding his eyes. "yeah."

he hums. "but you don't sound excited?" he asks.

"well, i was, last night."

"i'm sorry," he winces. "do you wanna tell me now and i'll pretend this didn't happen and i don't know about it?"

you shake your head. "no, it's fine. the moment's kinda… ruined, already."

he sighs. "yeah, i know. i'm sorry i ruined it."

"i said it's fine, jun."

"no, it's not fine," he says firmly. "it's one hundred percent my fault. this is important to you, and to us, and we should be celebrating right now. last night should never have happened."

"jun, it's in the past. it was messed up, but i forgive you," you say, lifting you head to look at him once more. "it's not a big deal. we're okay now."

"i just want you to be happy about it," he says with a sniff. "we've been trying for so long, and finally…" he trails off, staring at you with watery eyes. 

you smile at him. "i am happy about it, junnie. i'm so happy, you can't even believe."

"did you tell seokmin?" he asks, and his brows furrow when you shake your head no.

"no, i didn't. i wanted you to be the first i told," you say shyly. "i knew you would want to be the first to know."

"i love you so much," he says, still hugging you. he's never going to let you go, never again. "do you know how far along?"

"no, i didn't go to the doctor. probably like two or three weeks, though, if i've been counting it right."

"wow," he sighs, a smile on his face as he stares off into the distance behind you. "i can't wait."

you watch his eyes, practically able to see the thoughts running through his head. 

after a while he loosens his grip around you, moving to swipe at his eyes quickly with the back of his hand. "well—anyway," he starts, giving you an awkward chuckle. "i bought stuff for breakfast. if you haven't had any, yet. and i'm making dinner tonight, too."

before you can even respond his eyes widen, like he's just now remembering all the things he had planned, and he lets go of you, bounding into the kitchen. he returns seconds later with a huge glass vase full of flowers, practically tripping over his own feet in his rush to hand them to you. "and i got these for you, too. sorry they're not the best, it's all the store had this morning."

"junnie, if this is the best the store had, then i don't think i wanna see their best," you laugh, holding the flowers up and admiring the dozens of bright blooms. "this is gorgeous, but you really didn't need to get me anything."

"but i wanted to," he counters, still running around the room to grab the gift bag sitting by the couch. "consider it an 'i'm very sorry' slash 'congrats you're having a baby' gift."

you set the vase down on the table next to you and take the bag from him, pulling out the tissue paper and crumpling it into a ball.

"i didn't have a whole lot of time to look this morning, but i found these," he says nervously, waiting for your reaction.

from the bag you pull out a miniature plastic hanger holding a set of tiny pajamas covered in little kitties, attached to a matching set of striped orange socks.

"i wanted to be the first person to get you baby clothes," he explains as he fidgets with his hands. 

"i knew you would," you smile at him, setting the empty bag and the clothes on the table along with the bouquet of flowers. "and they're perfect. they're so… you."

you throw your arms around his neck, pulling him back in for another hug. "i love all of it. thank you, jun."

he grins, rocking you back and forth in his arms and leaving kisses all over your cheek. "i love you too, baby. i missed you so much. i won't ever do that again."

"i know," you smile. "now… you promised me breakfast, isn't that right? because i'm starving. crying is exhausting."

he laughs. "no crying anymore. and i did promise you that, so tell me: do you want blueberry waffles, or strawberry?"

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[izurou]

⋆ .˚ 𖤐 — ft. SHIDOU RYUSEI ⋮ contains: f! reader. pet names. fingering. mentions of cum. alludes to reader being in a toxic relationship (not with shidou)

your roommate ryusei absolutely hates your boyfriend’s guts—and he makes it known.

they had their fair share of arguments before you stopped bringing him around altogether—most of which were focused on the way he treats you, and all of which resulted in him fleeing with his tail between his legs, because when ryusei bares his fangs—one’s chances of making it out alive plummet to zero.

however—limiting their contact with each other wasn’t enough to mellow ryusei out, because the mere thought of you and this douchebag being together had him seeing shades of red unknown to the human eye.

you should be with him instead. yeah, he’d treat you so much better, give you everything you want and more, have you seeing stars every night—oh, how you drive him insane, he fucking hates that you’re not with him instead.

but then, like a sweet little angel with a shattered wing—you return to your shared apartment late one night, tears staining your cheeks, a little pout glued to your lips—and ryusei feels pure elation for the first time in months.

“awwwwww,” he coos, immediately making your personal space his own as he brings his hands up to cup your cheeks—wiping at the wet trails with his thumbs. “what’s wrong, pretty girl? you been cryin’?”

he’s holding your face just inches from his own—his presence all consuming as he tilts his head to the side and puts on a faux frown to match yours.

“leave me alone ryusei,” you mutter, avoiding his persistent gaze as you place your hands atop his wrists and pull them down.

you brush past him—just looking to head for your bed so you can snuggle under the covers with a box of tissues, but you don’t get too far.

“hey,” he calls, and you turn just in time to watch every ounce of humanity drain from his face—an animalistic snarl taking over his lips, paired with two balled up fists that cause his biceps to flex. “what’d that asshole do this time?”

“doesn’t matter,” you sniffle, rubbing your eye with the sleeve of your sweatshirt. “we’re over.”

“oh, that’s too bad sweetheart,” he hums, though his grin is back—tripled in size as he steps toward you once more, reaching out to tilt your chin up with his index finger. “you okay?“

you shake your head no—knowing he’d see right through you if you’d lied and said the opposite.

“what can i do for you, hm?” he persists, gingerly pressing a kiss to your cheek and licking his lips right after—savouring the saltiness of your tears with a sadistic smirk. “i’ll fuckin’ kill him if you want, would that make it better?”

“no, i just wanna forget about him,” you admit—hesitant to soak up all the attention he’s giving you. “never wanna think about him again.”

“why don’t i help, sweetheart?” he purrs, leaning down to let his breath fan over the shell of your ear. “won’t even remember your name when i’m done with you.”

and maybe it was his words that got you, or the relentless need to be loved in that very moment—but you end up in his bed, propped up against a pillow as he hovers over you.

“yeah, that’s it,” he chuckles—one hand planted beside your head for support, while the other is buried between your thighs. “you hear yourself? pussy’s so fuckin’ wet, gonna cum for me?”

his long middle and ring fingers curl inside you, squelching with each thrust as they coax more and more arousal out of your pretty cunt.

“r-ryu—i, i’m,” you choke on your words, already feeling tears stinging the corner of your eyes from the overwhelming pleasure he’s providing, though some still carry all the emotions you came home with.

“shit, pretty fuckin’ girl,” he groans, dropping to his forearm and craning his neck—pressing his lips against the fresh trail of tears. “mmm, you’re gonna kill me, y’know.”

his cock strains against his sweatpants as you writhe beneath him, definitely a pretty shade of pink as the tip cries from excitement. he’s only imagined this every damn night for god knows how long, even fucked his fist to the thought of it—even with you and that asshole right next door.

you feel the knot in your stomach tighten before it comes undone, reducing you to a squirming pile of gasps and moans as you pulse on his fingers—prompting him to straighten up and watch as you fall apart.

“yeaahh, look at that,” he drawls, watching your walls contract around his digits through hooded lids. “think i’m about to cum, shit.”

he rips his fingers from your messy cunt and pops them into his mouth, sucking the thin layer of you clean off. he hums in content, and you watch his abs tense up—breath faltering as a little patch on his sweats turns a shade darker.

“see what you do to me, sweetheart?” he sighs, dropping his hand back down and shoving it into his pants. he tugs his cock from behind the sticky fabric—pumping his last bit of cum onto his hand.

“ryusei, please,” you whine, desperate for more, hoping to erase your memory even further—but also just plain turned on by the fact that he creamed his pants because of you.

“don’t worry, i’m just gettin’ started,” he laughs, letting his tongue fall out of his mouth—a little preview of the next thing you’ll be cumming on.

#izurou #ahhHHhh #shidou x reader #shidou smut #shidou ryusei x reader #blue lock x reader #bllk x reader #blue lock smut #bllk smut #i’m scared ahhfh i hope i did not butcher him

[iguessweallcrazyithinktho]

𝐉𝐮𝐝𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐡𝐚𝐦 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

All my fics for Jude ♥︎ some mature content (if over the age of 18 and you cannot see them go to settings, content you see and turn off mature block ♥︎ tag on Jude scenarios here

🩷 = mature

Last updated July 26th

A win anyways ♥︎ hi can u write jude x reader comforting him after losing the match?

A blurb with no name ♥︎ Can you do a little blurb with a jealous Jude? Maybe you’re a few years older than him and thinks you’d get along better with Trent?

Anything for you ♥︎ Request: one where jude takes care of you when you feel off/bad and the feeling comes out of Nowhere. Like you start to reminisce abt your childhood and it ruins your mood

The L word ♥︎ hiii could you please write a jude imagine where the reader and jude have a lazy day at home and it’s cute and fluffy and he confesses he loves reader for the first time? thank you 😊

Stay ♥︎ hi my love, would you mind doing an angsty jude bellingham smut where they have agreed to break up as he needs to focus on his career but they decide to spend one more night together and have very intimate but also sad sex before they have to leave eachother (and if you don’t mind have them kinda talk it out and decide not to split in the end if you want) thank you 🫶🏻 🩷

Biggest supporter ♥︎ can u write a Jude Bellingham fluff abt just going to his practices and games and being his biggest supporter

Kissing booth ♥︎ Based on a TikTok I saw. Where you tell Jude you love him while taking photos in a photo booth.

Makeup or breakup ♥︎ Jude says some disgusting things during an argument which results in you leaving for some space. Maybe you'll makeup... 🩷

The way he loves you ♥︎ Headcanon on the way Jude shows you he loves you

What about us ♥︎ Jude lied to you and said he was going to stay with you instead of transferring. You felt betrayed

Lust and envy ♥︎ Summary: IM BEGGING jude smut/angst where him and reader are broken up but he finds an old (rough?) sextape and he touches himself to it (we want details tho intense solo sessions are HOT😩) then yeah he regrets leaving her and wants her backkk, and then maybe shes with another guy and he gets all jealous and possessive (sorry to much details) I want toxic jude soooo bad 🤭 🩷

Soulmates ♥︎ sitting in the car in the rain, you and Jude havs a heart to heart

Initials ♥︎ I just know bf Jude would buy you a necklace or a bracelet with his initial on it 😍

The other woman ♥︎ Jude can’t get enough of you, but he is with another woman that's not you 🩷

My life ♥︎ Jude angst where he tries to break up with the reader because he thinks that his life is too much for her but she’s not having it. Just like ‘yea but no’

Mykonos ♥︎ You and Jude enjoy your time on the beach together but that was cut short when you both decided the hotel room was a better option 🩷

Birthday surprise ♥︎ you surprise Jude on his birthday after being away from him for a while. You give me him a little something as well 🩷

There's this girl ♥︎ Jude and the reader talking late at night because they barely got to talk during the day. They talk about the random things, laughing at each other shitty jokes And stuff. Neither wants to hang up because they love to hear each other’s voice )

Love languages ♥︎ all five Love language with Jude 🩷

Hidden feelings ♥︎ Can we got some enemies to lovers with Jude maybe him and the reader “hate” each other but are in the same friend group and one day reader gets hurt and he rushes to come and help her 😩😩 anything will don’t tbh

Soul intertwine ♥︎ English is not my first language so sorry for the mistakes… I was thinking about something fuffly + smut. Like the reader being innocent and a shy person. She and jude got into their relationship recently and they have had no sex yet bc jude don’t wants to pressure her to do anything (but ofc he wants have sex w her), especially when he starts to realize how innocent she is… he thinks she’s too cute and at the same time he wants to ruin her, he feel the need to protect her. But when y/n is in a convo w her girlies friends and one of them asks about her sex life w jude and she don’t know what to say, she would be curious about it but would be too shy to talk w jude about it he would find it weird that she was quiet and looking bothered by something and would talk w her. After insists a lot, she finally says about all the stuffs that she heard about her friends and she would be “idk how react” and jude gets fully turned on by her innocent but makes he’s best to not show ithe tries to find a way to explain for her without destroy her innocent but she wants to know about everything and she wants him to do everything w her bc she wants to be his. 🩷

๑‧˚₊꒷︶ଓ︶꒷꒦⊹๑‧˚₊꒷︶ଓ︶꒷꒦⊹๑

Main Masterlist

© writing by Iguessweallcrazyithinktho do not steal or repost any of my content anywhere without my consent

#Jude Bellingham x reader #Jude Bellingham #jude bellingham x you #Jude Bellingham fluff #Jude Bellingham fanfiction #jude bellingham smut #jude bellingham x fem!reader

[yan-lorkai]

Imagine yandere Lucifer punishing his darling but instead of spells or line writing he goes for the silent treatment or just leaving them in a dark and enclosed space so and now there darling is getting flashbacks on how they were punished as a child and is begging him not to leave them

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Warnings: Yandere content, guilt tripping, child abuse, panic attack + comfort for the said panic attack, toxic relationship, probly some typos (❁´◡`❁)

You can still hear them, your parents screaming, their voices reverberating off the walls until everything goes silent. It is common for fights of this type to occur now; your father tries to protect you from your mother's extreme punishments, but he can never convince her to tell him where the basement keys are hidden.

Your father, blessed be his heart. He's was not good at defusing tension, throwing insults and punching things, and using a tone of voice so angry that it makes you shake and hold back crying.

Your childhood was like this, silent, ignored and sad, you often observed the world from behind the door lock. You could hear very faintly the news on television, you heard songs that your mother sang in an arithmic and out of tune tone, she gossiping with her friends, and above all you imagined a different life. A different world, with someone who loved you, with someone who protected you.

Things got even worse after your father's death, but you never told Lucifer these details. It wasn't a pleasant conversation to have, even though you trusted him a lot and you knew he would calmly comfort you and ease your fears, there was still distrust and pain present in your heart. You used to imagine a pink, pretty and glamorous love, and really Lucifer was all of that. But he had an additional danger lurking in the darkness of his heart, in his sharp-toothed smile and in his hands with huge claws that encircled your waist.

He was a demon and like all demons, the Morningstar loved possessively, a love so suffocating that it stole your entire essence. But you didn't care, you didn't know better and you let him take whatever he wanted from you without thinking twice. Lucifer was an extremely sweet and soft boyfriend most of the time, but he also was incredibly methodical.

Stopping to think now you don't know if he ever really loved you or the idea of ​​you. The idea of ​​a human lover who was strong and survived the seven lords of hell, the idea of ​​a lover who was kind and funny and so fragile he could rip you in half with a single punch. Maybe that was why Lucifer loved having you on his lap so much, resting his face on your neck while he worked, he needed something weak to feel strong.

Just like your mother needed you to blackmail your father. The strong overcoming the weak, hunter and prey. And once again there was nowhere for you to run or anyone to help you.

The problem with ideas is that they are fragile, they break easily. Today instead of you coming to spend your time with Lucifer like you always did, you preferred to spend time with Simeon and Luke. They were your friends, it was only natural. But apparently it wasn't something that pleased Lucifer, he didn't like it one bit and he let you know this with the severe expression attached on his face.

"I will give you a chance to redeem yourself," ruby ​​eyes staring into yours as if he withheld all the truth in the world and you were the most lying human he had ever seen. As if you were a flower that he needed to cleanse of the weeds that corrupted you. "Apologize if you will."

There was something different about him as soon as you found him. The soft sound of piano coming from his record player as the open windows let the air in and the dark atmosphere sink into your bones, a shiver went down your spine just like it did when you witnessed Lucifer punishing one of his brothers.

A bitter taste spreading in your mouth as you watched him cross his arms and smile. But it wasn't the same smile he gave you as soon as you got a good grade on your test or right after you two woke up. That smile was one of fascination every time he whipped Mammon or killed a demon, dark, sly smile that made a knot curl in your throat and tears of fear come to your eyes. A dark smile.

You remembered your father's voice. You remembered the slaps you received from your mother and your little world in the basement. You trembled, not knowing how to respond or act, only being able to count how many times Lucifer sighed or the number of times his feet made contact with the floor. The silence stretched until it seemed obscene. And the Morning Star had reached the end of his patience, disappointed in your silence and angry at being your second choice.

He crossed his office with slow steps, his expression now more neutral, Lucifer held your face between his hands tightly, his nails bruising your skin. You waited for anything, screams, attacks, except Lucifer touching his forehead to yours and looking into your eyes as if you were a dumb little thing. There was tenderness and there was fear, and there was a little of everything, your heart beating confusedly inside your chest as you drown on your own feelings.

"My sweet, naive summer child, you don't know what you did, do you?" He uses that condescending tone that almost makes you roll your eyes, but you don't, realizing that you're already in trouble and you don't want to irritate him even more. "Lovers are always each other's first priority, MC. Ever."

Your eyes widened as Lucifer freed your face from his hands and turned onto his back. "Wasn't I good enough for you, Mc? Have I not cared for and loved you always, as a good lover would? So why am I not your first priority like you are mine?"

Oh. You had hurt him. Oh my, you had hurt him.

You denied, pulling his arm so he turned to face you again. "No, no, I love you very much, Luci, I don't have eyes for anyone but you and I'm sorry if I made you doubt my feelings."

But he remained standing with his back to you, thinking, Lucifer was unpredictable when he was hurt, he was angry in his actions and vengeful in his words, and when he was quiet like this you always felt a little apprehensive. He walked away without saying anything in return, back to his paperwork, as if you weren't even there.

Was he ignoring you? You decided to move closer to him, guilt pounding in your chest as you sat down in the chair he always kept next to his. The same chair you left empty today while you were having fun with the angels, not thinking about how lonely he must be feeling being alone all day.

Were you really so wrong about spending time with your friends? Several minutes passed in silence, broken only by the sound of a pen dragging over paper and your breathing. It was so uncomfortable, the silence, you turned to see the closed expression that had closed on Morningstar's beautiful face, eyebrows twisted, lips set, he wasn't happy at all.

"Lucifer, can we talk?" You asked.

Lucifer, however, remained silent, not giving in to your words. He hummed his favorite song as he read and signed documents, smoothing his bangs as they fell in his eyes. In other times he would be reading to you out loud as you had confided in him that you loved listening to him speak, you would pull your chair closer and lay your head on his shoulder. You hated the silence.

In the silence you remembered the days spent in the basement, the sleepless nights and the shadows that crept from the walls to you, close to touching you before disappearing. And then the cycle repeated itself, your parents screamed, you listened the news and the gossips, night came and the shadows return, tauting you, mocking you.

You looked down, feeling the depth of the wound you had caused. The silence persisted, heavy, as you remained distant from each other, trapped in a moment of disagreement and hurt. The tightness in your heart became unbearable, suddenly you were back in your small basement room, the light fading, the cold crackling over your skin.

You looked down, your feet chained to the walls again while roachs and rats runned past you. And Lucifer... Lucifer had abandoned you because you ruined everything. Your body tightened, you took one, two breaths until you realized that the oxygen was not able to reach your lungs.

'He hates you.' An annoying voice screamed in your mind, making you flinch on your seat. 'He's going to break with you. He's going to leave you alone again.'

'If even your parents couldn't love, why he should?"

'Undeserving and ungrateful, good for nothing human.'

Too much noise. Too much silence. Too much everything. Invisible hands started to climb up your body, leaving you trembling and gasping for air.

Everything is crashing down on your already overwhelmed mind. You were stumbling in the darkness, without a light in sight, no end in the horizon. No switch to flick the light on, no Bringer of light in sight. Trapped forever here, alone. You clutched onto your chest with weak fingers. Your lungs were rising and falling at a far rapid pace, one you couldn’t gain control of. Everything was burning. What was this?

A panic attack? A heart attack? 

A pair of hands found their place on your shoulders, nails digging straight into your skin, burning, scratching. You felt lightheaded, a thin line of sweat bathing starting to run down your neck as you tried to breath. Your eyes were open but you saw only darkness in front of you, you could breath only darkess, for it was only you and darkness that existed right here and right now.

The only good thing on your life was your relationship and you destroyed it so easily, so mindlessly.

There, in the darkness you could see your mom's face wearing a twisted smile. You struggled against your shackles backing away from her at every step she took on your direction, red painted nails trying to reach you, trying to harm you again as she always did.

“Breathe in, darling.” Lucifer’s voice cut through the panic, voice sounding too angelic for a demon like him. “Look at me, darling, I'II help you.”

You still looked at her, smile on her lips, eyes wild with angry. You whimpered, trying to put some more distance between you two.

She disapperead as soon as Lucifer placed your hand on his chest, freeing you from her mirage. “Slowly breath in!” You followed your lover's instructions, breathing through the nose at the same time as him. If anyone could save you from the darkness and the pain now, it was him. “And out- keeping going, darling, just like that.”

There was urgency in his voice you realized. But why? Why would he care when he hated you? The voices on your head had lied to you? But he also had leaved you alone - though you did the same to him just earlier, it's true.

“Breath in-” Light. It was you how would describe him, black as coal hair being lightned by a broken halo. He held onto you so softly, wiping the thick tears that you haven't even realized that were falling. You could see that he was confuse, scared even, since not even Mammon behaved like this after or during a punishment. "Everything's ok?"

The cat seemed to have caught your tongue, your head lolling forward as your entire body collapsed into his chest. Tired, that's how you felt, tired of the pain, tired of the darkness and having to remember that person.

That person who should love and protect you. That person that made your life a living hell just because she could, because it was fun, the same person whose house you would return after the exchange program.

Sobs erupted from your chest, trembling again in Lucifer's arms but from a different reason now. From exhaustion, from fear. Your arms circling his torso with enought stregth to knock him up if he was a puny and weak human. But he was not. He was not, if he was cruel like her then he would be laughing now, he would bellitle you.

He was not cruel. And he couldn't know that ignoring you would trigger such reaction. It was all your fault.

You looked at him, brows furrowed, apprehension on his eyes as he hold you, hands rubbing your sides and back. Lucifer was nothing like her, would never be like her even in a million years.

"I'm sorry." You whispered unable to formulate a better apologize. "Don't hate me, please."

Please, don't leave me. Please don't take the light away. Just please stay, you wanted to scream, want to let him know what happened. But couldn't, eyes blurry with fresh new tears, lips trembling, and Lucifer held you gently. He knew you couldn't talk right now, could see in your eyes that you were unable right now with panic and fear swimming in them - any and all reasons for your sudden outburst forgotten while he comforted you so gently.

The awful silence was replaced by your lover's loud little kisses that he peppered your face with. "It's ok, love, I've got you."

IBut you were right, he was nothing like your mother. In fact, he was worse and he recorded this entire event on his mind, replaying it, trying to find a reason why you reacted that way.

With time he could use this to shape you, could train you to never leave him, to never look at anyone else, to not even thinking any dumb throughts. He smiled, bringing you much closer than before, there on the floor, for you have fallen without realizing, hugging him, you felt safe again, felt loved, if only you realized that his love was toxic and suffocating... But it's too late now.

#yandere obey me #obey me #yandere lucifer #yandere lucifer x mc #yandere lucifer x reader #lucifer x mc #lucifer x reader #obey me lucifer #lucifer avatar of pride #lorkai drabble

[pablitogavii]

Care

Summary: Before Pablo, you were in a toxic and abusive relationship so when you two play fight, you flinch and Pablo notices immediately reminding you that he would always take care of you <33

Pairing: Pablo Gavi x Reader

Warnings: slight angst/ fluffy <3

"Amor! Give me the remote!" Pablo was trying to grab the remote from your hand repeatedly to play some boring football game but you were watching your favorite Telenovela.

"Not a chance! I need to see if Juan Carlos marries Ana in this episode!" you say hiding it behind your back with your eyes glued to the screen.

"Bebé sometimes I think you love Juan Carlos more than me!" Pablo whined and you chuckled at how easily your Sevillano gets jealous, even of fictional characters.

"I do have a particular weakness for Spaniards.." you start earning a glare from your boyfriend "but I also tend to fall for angry Barça midfielders" you finished earning a smirk as he moved to sit closer.

"Lindaaa" he rubbed his nose against yours and you blushed closing your eyes waiting for the kiss but instead he grabbed the remote from your hand switching the channel.

"Pablo!!" you whine this time you trying to steal a remote from his hands while straddling his lap making smirk but still keep the remote out of your reach.

"Give it back Gavira!!" you said while he chuckled whenever you would use his full name when you get angry.

"Try and get it nena" Pablo challenged with a smirk and you pouted trying to think how to win against him knowing how much stronger he was that you. Then you came up with an idea! Tickle war! He might me toned and muscular but he is ticklish like a baby!

When you started tickling him he started to move around bringing his hand forwards to stop you but that movement made you flinch instinctively which made him stop completely shocked that you just did that.

"Amor? Hey, you okay? I was just going to grab your hand..I would never actually hurt you..why did you flinch?" Pablo felt horrible seeing your eyes fill with years. You weren't upset at him or what he did knowing that Pablo would never lay a finger at you like that, but hating the fact that after so many years it was still affecting you.

"Um..I should..I should go..I'm sorry" you got off his lap feeling horrible that you couldn't still get over what happened to you in the past not wanting to bother Pablo with it.

"No..no..no..por favor..don't leave...I can't handle you being afraid of me..I..would never hurt you.." Pablo stood up as well careful to keep his distance as to not make you flinch again and you appreciated it very much. Not many people knew how to properly handle you in these kinds of situations.

"I'm not afraid of you cariño..it was just..um..an instinct" you admitted playing with the edge of your shirt while looking down at the floor sadly. You didn't want Pablo to think you are damaged so you haven't told him anything in the past few months that you were dating.

"Can I..hold you amorcito? Please?" Pablo asked not wanting to invade your personal space until he knew that's what you wanted and you nodded smiling as his arms wrapped around your waist and he pulled you to sit back down on the couch in between his legs rested against his toned chest.

"Tell your Pablito linda..I need to know about this" Pablo said and you sighed nodding your head knowing that he was right.

"My ex hit me one time..and ever since then I flinch when someone's hand moves towards my face..I'm sorry" you say feeling even more guilty now that you said it aloud.

"You have nothing to be sorry for nena..How could someone do something like that to you? You are the sweetest most precious girl I have ever met in my life..I'm so sorry mi anjo" his hand was in your hair as he stroked it gently while your head rested on his chest and you were focused on his heartbeat while tears spilled out your eyelids and down your cheeks.

"He was very jealous..wouldn't let me go out with my friends..and that nigh I went behind his back and he got very angry..." you said and Pablo kissed the top of your head as you looked up shattering his heart when he saw your tearful eyes sparkling sadly up at him.

"Is that why you asked me if you could wear that dress when we went out with Frankie and Mikky?" Pablo said and you nodded feeling little embarrassed but the way he asked felt judgement free and you were comfortable to be honest with him.

"I want you to listen to me now princesa. In this relationship, you can wear whatever you like, you can go out with your friends, you don't have to feel like you have to ask me what you are allowed to do..I trust you..and I love you..and I know you love me..and I will make sure not to do things that might trigger you to flinch and bring back those horrible memories now that I know about it.." Pablo speaking softly while caressing your face made your tears fall faster from how comforting his words were and how safe you finally felt with a man.

"I love you so much Pablo..thank you" you nuzzled into his neck counting to softly cry while he kissed the top of your head lovingly moving his hand softly up and down your back soothingly.

"I love you too nena..you are my special girl..and I want you to feel safe when your are with me" Pablo spoke and you looked up pecking his lips softly to which he smiled.

"I do feel safe..and I should have told you earlier. I just didn't want you to think I was demanded.." you admit and he kissed your nose and then your forehead.

"We are all a little damaged nena, that's because we are human..but this doesn't make you any less perfect in my eyes I promise..if anything I think you are so brave" Pablo said drying your tears while you cuddled up to him closer smiling to yourself.

He changed the channel back to your Telenovela sitting there watching it with you for the rest of the night while holding and kissing you from time to time just to assure you that he is still right there next to you..<3

Short but very important story for me..hope you like it <3

#pablo gavi #pablo gavi icons #pablo gavi x reader #pablo gavi x y/n #pablo gavi x you #fc barca #fc barcelona #fc barça #gavi #gavigif #gavira #pablo martín páez gavira #pablo gavira #gavi x reader #gavi x yn #gavi x you #pablo gavi imagine #pablo gavi drabble #pablo gavi fanfic #pablo gavi x reader smut

[respectthepetty]

Dear Respect the Petty,

I have long enjoyed your posts about colors etc (like, to the extent that when you went on vacation I was legit sad), but I don't usually notice those details in shows by myself.

However, today, in Only Friends ep 4, something was so blatant that I finally picked up on it, and I have a question.

When Ray came to apologize to Mew for kissing him without consent, Mew was in the kitchen in this warm lighting, whereas Ray quickly moved into a dark blue space. The contrast was wild. And then Mew came closer to Ray and hung out in this half-and-half space with some blue on him.

I'm proud of myself for noticing something, but I don't know what it means about these boys/their colors/their mental states/their relationship.

Got any thoughts?

Thanks for sharing your insights (about this and also in general)!

@sorry-bonebag, this ask was so formal in structure, that I got a little scared. I felt like I had to answer it even though I have no less than ten other asks chilling in my inbox about the colors in Only Friends. But, honest moment here - I don't notice the colors when Khaotung is on my screen because I'm mesmerized by his beauty.

Like, LOOK at him!

I didn't even know what color that background was because my sight stopped at his face, and yellow is my favorite color! The jawline, the hair, the lips, the face, THE MAN! LOOK AT HIM!

So unlike Boston and Nick, who favor being in the dark together

Even when they have the opportunity for light, (God, I love their toxic asses)

I don't recognize color when Ray enters the room, not really at least. Of course, I noticed my little red flag being a demon ruining Sand's night by stalking him and breaking Sand's bottles, but only because Ray's lips really popped with that red background.

Just like the bar sign really made his lips pop that other time he was ruining Sand's night by suggesting a threesome at his house.

And because I like Boss "No Boundaries" Ton being lit up with the red lights while looking at photos, I did notice the transition into Ray's room focused on the red which then shifted to Ray pouring drinks.

But it's really because the opening credits only show the bar, the photos, and the alcohol in red because they are the dangers of this show.

So, like I was saying, I don't notice the colors because I'm captivated by Ray's glowing skin, which is why it pisses me off every time he is with Mew because Mew gets the Linda Evangelista treatment while Ray is forced into the shadows EVEN IN HIS OWN HOME!

Ray is usually watching Mew from the shadows or being overshadowed by Mew, literally! Mew is always sitting in front of Ray cutting him off from the light source.

Which is why I like it when Ray is with Sand because my little Ray of sunshine thrives. Even in the darkness, his skin is glowing!

The car ride the first night when Sand stopped him from driving drunk? Angelic like the heavens are shining on him! *bites knuckles*

But then again, that's how we were introduced to the boys in class. The spotlight was on Mew, Ray was in his shadow, and Boston was in the dark. (Chuem, you're doing great, hon!)

So you telling me that Mew, once again, gets to be in the warm light, while my visually stunning man who has never done a bad thing in his life (except, you know, the laundry list of bad shit he has done) gets the cool light even though they are IN THE SAME APARTMENT . . .

*takes a deep breath* It tracks.

But I'm glad that Mew stepped into the cool light with Ray as Ray apologized.

Because they are friends, and Mew has proven that although he can't give Ray light, he is willing to share some of Ray's darkness.

Which tells me that it isn't really Mew stealing light from Ray

But instead, Ray needs to step out into the light and embrace the warmth that others openly give him.

So I'm very proud of you for noticing this, and know that I'm really rooting for Ray realizing how good Sand is for his skin, I mean heart . . . no, I mean skin, so I can continue to enjoy the radiant being that is Khaotung when he gets that good lighting.

Thanks for the ask, and I'll try not to get entranced by Khaotung's flawless features, so I can notice cool visuals like you.

Wish me luck!

#only friends #only friends the series #ray is living in the shadows #when he should be out in the sun #the colors mean things #and they mean my boy needs Sand to shine!

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

full hc request: platonic m6 with mc who is going through a break up after a long term relationship and is just down in the dumps and crying at random times and m6 just make them feel better

The Arcana HCs: M6 comforting MC after a bad breakup

~ @elysian-chaos here you go, lil sis, I hope you like these and that you receive whatever comfort you're needing from them :) ~

Julian

So, here's the thing: healthy coping mechanisms are not his forte

Yes, he wants to see you happy, yes, he wants to see you heal, yes, he wants to bring you comfort

Offering to get blackout drunk with you is not the best way to accomplish that and he doesn't realize it until he sees the look on your face and hears himself make the offer

... tell you what, you tell him what you're hoping to accomplish, and he'll try to use that big brain of his to find a way to do it

Assuming you're of age, he's still going to offer you a little alcohol, if only to make it easier to talk about things more freely

If he figures out that hugging you helps, then he's giving you hugs every time you're sad (and considering how all encompassing they are, it's very good for making you feel a little whole again)

No matter how messy or weird things were, there is zero judgement coming from this guy. He's had his own share of toxic/questionable/inadvisable/problematic situationships

Nobody knows poor self-esteem like he does and he's quick to nip any kind of self-punishment in the bud

Never gets tired of hearing you talk about it and is not at all fazed by messy crying. He's a doctor, bodily fluids are normal, and he's happy to use his handkerchief to dry your tears and blow your nose

Asra

Genuinely one of the best people you could ever go to for comfort. They're here, they've got you, they love you unconditionally, and they will always prioritize your feelings and personal wellbeing

So many hugs and cuddles. He'll curl up with you in a pile of soft pillows and blankets and hold you for as long as you need to cry

Whatever you want to do to cope, they'll do it with you and somehow find a way to make it even more comforting

If you want to talk about it, he'll brew your favorite tea and give it to you in one of those big, two-handed mugs so you have something warm to hold and focus on

If you want to get back at your breakup, they'll come up with all kinds of devious tricks to make their life inconvenient

If you just want to cry it out into a tub of ice cream while you watch movies, he'll grab some pumpkin bread to go with it and keep his shoulder and some tissues handy to cry on

There's no space to feel down about yourself. They will beat any negativity to the punch and heap you with more words of affirmation than you really know what to do with

There's no such thing as a "bad time" for him. He starts trips at midnight, if you wake up lonely at 2 AM he's down to wander through the dark streets with you until you can sleep again

Nadia

She's a little ... torn

She cares about you very much and wants to see you happy

Which is why seeing you cry gives her both the urge to make you smile again and to track down whoever's responsible and serve them some sweet, sweet justice

Talking to her about it is great if you want perspective and analysis on what went wrong, and really really great if you want solutions and strategies to help you move on

But Nadia is a fixer. She has a hard time listening to pain when she feels like there's something she can do about it, and an even harder time when it involves someone important to her crying

She'll end up pampering the daylights out of you

Seriously, you deserve good things, after going through something so painful she wants you to remember what it's like to be treated according to the value you truly hold as a person

She'll take you on platonic dates to boost your confidence and spoil you out of your low self-esteem

And hey, if it's a post-relationship makeover you need, say no more

She'll take you shopping for your new look, she'll help you pick out the new hair, she'll let you smell all of her scents if you want to switch to a different perfume/cologne. She's got you

Muriel

He's ... not great with words. He knows this. You know this. We all know this. Talking it out is not his thing

However, if you just need a quiet, safe space to detach from everything and fall apart for a bit, he can relate perfectly. Stay as long as you need to, sleep as much as you need to, but don't yell

If you want to yell, just let him know so he can take you to a better yelling spot that doesn't involve stressing out the chickens

He's not going to initiate much comfort, because he's not sure what you want, so if you do want hugs you'll have to ask

But he will make you soup. And eggs. And egg soup. And some of the weird tea Asra left lying around several years ago (actually wait, let him try it first, he doesn't know what it does or if it's still good)

And he will bring you plenty of blankets to wrap up in and mountains of firewood to keep the hut warm and cozy

If you want to talk about it, he'll listen. Depending on how messy it got, you might get a slightly judgy look here and there, but it's you he cares about and it's you he's listening to

Speaking of, he can hold a grudge. Whoever broke your heart is going to get some major stinkeye from him if they ever meet

Inanna's not a lapdog, but she's a cuddler if you need it. She can and will curl up on top of you if you need the comfort

Portia

Portia's an exceptionally empathetic person. It's what makes her so good at connecting with people across divides and seeing things from multiple perspectives

It's also what makes her cry almost as much as you do when you go through your breakup. If your heart is broken then so is hers

Which is why she is the best buddy for joining you in your sorrows and keeping you company. She will watch the sappy movies with you. She will eat the tubs of ice cream with you

She will get absolutely furious with your ex and curse them out until she's red in the face with you. She will offer to help you sabotage their future attempts at romantic connections with you

(don't let her do that last thing, she's going to accomplish it a little too effectively and then you'll both live with the guilt)

(unless of course said ex has a pattern of being seriously toxic/cruel to their partners, in which case, go ahead with the Countess's blessing and let her know if you'll need legal backup)

Bear hugs. The biggest, tightest, comfiest bear hugs

And self-care, when you're done with the ice cream and movies. She can set up an impressive at-home spa day

Pepi will follow you all around the cottage and even give you the honor of curling up and falling asleep on your lap. Don't move

Editing to add:

Lucio

Lucio doesn't have the easiest time processing his emotions, much less helping somebody else process theirs. He's very happy to help you but it's not going to be conventional by any means

You look angry. He'll take you somewhere good for sparring so you can let the aggressive feelings out instead of thinking about them

You look sad. Would you like him to throw you a party to cheer up?

Not even a distraction party? Not even a "good riddance" party? Not even a "I'm going to show off how many friends I have and how good I look in this outfit so they know what they lost" party? No?

Huh. You really don't process stuff the way he does, then

On the other hand, he will take your side no matter how messy it got. You're the best, you're his favorite person, and therefore anybody who causes you suffering is clearly in the wrong

Surprisingly good at giving you pep talks. He's a charismatic guy and he wholeheartedly believes every good thing he says about you

You're the best. End of discussion

He gets really uncomfortable if he sees you crying though. He just hates seeing you sad and he hates not knowing what to do about it

Mercedes and Melchior, on the other had, will lick your tears away until the only thing left on your face is dog slobber

#ask arcana brainrot #the arcana #the arcana headcanons #the arcana hc #the arcana game #asra the arcana #julian the arcana #nadia the arcana #muriel the arcana #portia the arcana #lucio the arcana #asra alnazar #julian devorak #nadia satrinava #muriel of the kokhuri #portia devorak #lucio morgasson

[bahrtofane]

Dialogue 15 and trope 19 with Kylian 💞 Your writing is so good!

thank u sm !! enjoy lovely <333

- "Can we start over, just you and me?" -  Second Chance

word count - 600+

watch it - kinda toxic relationship but its okay kinda happy ending hehe

In some parallel universe there's a version of you and kylian that haven't broken up and you're still in his home cozy in his expensive comforters without a care in the world as he pressed kisses to your cheeks. 

This is not your universe and the reality that you live is instead that you haven seen him in weeks and the last you did you stormed off screaming at dinner. Hey can you really blame yourself? 

Kylian has dragged you on a wild ride filled with so much drama you could actually kneel over and die just from thinking about it. 

And if you ask him, he'd say you were never together. The nerve. 

You hope he breaks a knee or something. That would shut him up. You think hes single handedly the most egotistical person you have ever had the misery of meeting. 

To him, he was untouchable. On and off the pitch. He was-is- Kylian Mbappe, what does anyone have to say to his face but praise? Nothing. 

Funny thing is you never meant to get involved this much. At the wrong moment at the wrong time. And boom you collided. Literally. At a friend's birthday dinner you got up to fix your dress, and here comes Mr hot shot not looking where he was going and slammed right into you. Sending you right into the table ribs first. That bruise was sore for ages. 

And the rest is history. A very miserable depressing history that leaves you with a pile of keepsakes under your bed. You have yet to find the heart to throw them out. 

And through all this you still let him come obver after practice to ‘talk.’ what the hell is there to talk about? The rumors that made you leave? The amount of times he never outright said you were together? God. 

He shows up soon enough. In all black and with flowers and a bag. You toss them into your kitchen table and guide him to your couch. 

“What is this about Kylian?” you sigh. 

He wrings his hands together, unable to look you in the eye. 

"Can we start over, just you and me?" soft. Gentle. 

“Kylain.” you warn. 

“I'm serious. I let talk and rumors get the best of me. I failed you in the process.”

“We start over and we what, do the same thing over and watch how you embarrass me?” you lash out. 

He winces,”no. I want you back and I want to treat you properly. I'm sorry for all I put you through. That's on me and always will be. But I can't just let you leave. I need you.”

"Fine," you relent, your tone laced with reluctance. "Let's start over. But this time, Kylian, we do it on my terms. No more games, no more lies. Just honesty, trust, and a genuine effort to make things work."

Kylian's expression softens, he's relieved. "I promise, this time will be different. I'll do whatever it takes to earn back your trust and make things right."

You nod, though the doubts still linger in the back of your mind. "We'll see," you murmur, unwilling to fully let your guard down just yet. You know him well enough to know not to jump for joy. He needs to prove all this talk to you first. 

As Kylian reaches out to take your hand, you can't help but wonder if you're making a mistake, if you're setting yourself up for heartbreak once again. But amidst the uncertainty, there's a glimmer of hope—a belief that maybe, just maybe, this time will be different.

Together, you take a tentative step forward, ready to give love another chance, praying that this time, it won't end in disappointment. Praying that you won't have to tear down every little thing that reminds you of him. That maybe Kylian has space for you in his life rather than just  haphazard room he's made on a whim from shoving things aside till they swallow you whole. 

Only time will tell. 

#kylian mbappe one shot #kylian mbappe x reader #kylian mbappe imagines #kylian mbappe fanfic #kylian mbappe imagine #kylian mbappe fluff #mbappe imagine #mbappe fanfic #mbappe x reader #kylian mbappe x you #mbappe x you #mbappe x y/n #kylian x reader #kylian imagines #kylian x you #kylian fanfic #kylian fluff #kb7 blurbs #kb7 #bahr footy #bahr 300 event

[the-dumpster-fire-of-life]

Hiii, I love how we all collectively want to be part of the band so again, band member reader. This request is a little more angsty :)) I wanted to request break up headcanons for the twins, or a twin of your choice. Let's say that even though they love each other a lot the pressure from being on tour and having practically no private life makes them fight a lot. It would be nice if you could include how the breakup affects the order in the band too.

This here is optional. Idk if you're down to write for older twins, but maybe after the huge break TH took between 2012 and 2014 it served as enogh time being away from each other and when they meet again they feel like it's time to give the relationship a second chance

(Hello! Sure I can and ty for requesting, I hope you enjoy this even if it sucks!)

Breakup and Makeup HC'S

Bill Kaulitz

Bill truly loved being on tour and famous

But if he knew it would cause this, he didn't know if he would do it again

He loves you so badly and he loved being so close to you

But being on tour greatly affected your relationship

There was no privacy on the bus, there was no room, there were arguments and there was bickering

Sure there was that before, but that was small gigs and before being enclosed in a space every day and every night

He hates arguing with you in the first place

But now arguments were everyday

You and him didn't talk much anymore, only bickering and yelling and he hates it

He missed being close to you and doing everything you guys loved together

But stress, pressure and the tour outmatched love you guys had for one another

He didn't want to, but you guys needed a break

It was hard especially because of the tour and you guys still had to be around one another

You guys used to be best friends before dating

And you guys agreed to go back to how that was, no bad blood, just a mutual decision to break things off for now

Especially with shit going on in their break and having to stop being Tokio Hotel for a bit

The breakup did affect the band

There was always some unspoken tension everytime you guys were in a room

They could see how it affected both you and Bill even if you guys didn't want to show it

Gustav comforted you a lot along with Tom and Georg and they do the same for Bill

They didn't choose sides in the breakup because you're all still friends and it was no fault

They just hated seeing you guys upset

Tom felt like murdering Bill because he thought be broke up with you for no reason at first until you explained

Then he felt bad for his twin because he knows how much Bill loved you

Bill actually resented the tour and a bit of fame for doing this to your relationship but he knew that wasn't healthy

When you guys get your time away from one another it doesn't really help

Because it just makes you guys miss one another more

And when you see each other again it just feels like you guys are stuck when you broke up

But in a good way, like you guys can move and and hopefully fix this

And Bill hopes you guys can because he doesn't want to live without you any longer

Tom Kaulitz

The breakup actually hit harder than you expected

It got a bit toxic I'm not going to lie

Arguments with you guys are very loud and heated to the point you guys didn't talk to each other

You guys hate arguing but were stressed, overwhelmed and had literally no space

And that isn't healthy for either you guys or the band

Tom loved you very much, he knew that and so did you

But love didn't really out match nor face everything going on in your lives

You guys needed privacy and couldn't get any and that was a big fact on why you broke up

The breakup was an impulsive decision yelled out in an argument

It could be about anything but that's the moment like everything changed and stopped

There was some sort of tension and resentment you both held towards the other

Especially when the band took that long break with everything happening

But you guys were still on tour, broken up before the break

I feel Tom was sorta trying to get his mind off of you or replace you in some way he could

Either by flirting or going out with girls and bragging about it

He turned sorta into a dick trying to rile you up when he really just wanted you back

You didn't do anything about it but was sorta hurt but wouldn't let him see

The band felt bad for you guys and Bill felt like killing Tom for what he was doing

He understood why he did it and tried to get you guys to at least talk it out

Gustav was trying his best to be there for both of you guys while Georg was trying to mend the tension

You and Tom barely spoke before you broke up but now you don't talk at all

Even when you guys all had that break

Tom slowed down with trying to replace you, stopping everything because he quite literally could not

By toxic earlier I meant you guys sorta still clung onto the belief you guys were dating

Like hugs, kisses, makeouts and even hidden hookups to try and cling onto the strings of your broken down relarionship

Obviously it didn't work at all but you guys still wanted to believe

You missed him so fucking much and he missed you the same

When you guys put the band back together Tom sorta matured and was trying to mend things with you

Everything went slow and you guys were best friends since childhood before dating so you sorta went back to that

But best friends now with lingering feelings

Tom and you both confessed about these feelings but didn't want to ruin it all over again

So you guys took it a bit slower

You guys didn't jump right at it, but didn't get with anyone else to not ruin it again

And slowly but surely, you guys worked back to how it used to be

But you mended the mistakes and came back better than before

And Tom would never let it happen again

#tokio hotel #tokio hotel x reader #tokio hotel imagine #bill kaulitz #tokio hotel georg #gustav tokio hotel #tokio x reader #tom kaulitz imagines #tom kaulitz #tom kaulitz x reader #bill kaulitz imagines #bill kaulitz x reader #kaulitz twins #gustav schafer #gustav schäfer #georg listing #georg

[antianakin]

MY STANCES ON CONTROVERSIAL CHARACTERS ARE AS FOLLOWS

Anakin Skywalker: This one's fairly obvious, but I'm one of the people who doesn't see Anakin as redeemed by the end of ROTJ just because he saved one person he personally gives a damn about. My definition of redemption is about atoning and making amends, and Anakin has no possible way of actually DOING THAT for most of the things he's done, so there's no real way of acquiring redemption. He can be a better person, he can be forgiven by individual people for things he's done to them, he can keep choosing to be selfless instead of selfish, but none of that necessarily means he has to be considered redeemed. If you think he's redeemed at the end of ROTJ and that's what brings you joy in your interpretation of the story, great, I honestly don't care. But if you choose to come into my notes and get mad at me because I don't think the space fascist is redeemed just because he decides to save his own son, you will now be blocked on sight, I'm done having that conversation with people.

The Jedi As A Whole: Wonderful people with a beautiful culture that never did a single thing to deserve what was done to them. They were not corrupt, they didn't need to reform their culture in a single way. There was nothing more they could've done for Anakin or the Republic that would've stopped what happened. They don't steal children, they adopt them from parents who choose to let their children lead a better life, and become part of the large extended Jedi family. They are intergalactic therapists whose literal way of life IS therapy for those who choose to follow it. They were outplayed, but they did everything they could've possibly done. Sometimes, it is possible to commit no mistakes, and still lose. That is not a weakness. That is life. (Side note here: This is an incredibly pro Jedi blog, if you come on my blog and criticize the Jedi in any way, you will be immediately blocked, I am so done with this fandom's anti-Jedi sentiments, consider this your warning.)

Padme Amidala: Deserved better from the Prequels, has such potential and promise and I want so dearly to save her from her toxic ass marriage to a fascist MAGA manchild, but damn am I glad Luke and Leia didn't have to grow up with her as a mother some days.

Bo-Katan Kryze: I wish I could like her, but the writers are making it SO HARD. They don't seem to ever remember that she gleefully set an entire village on fire because they dared ask for their enslaved people back and to not be occupied anymore, but I do.

Satine Kryze: I wish I could like her, but I don't have enough nostalgia for her to overlook how bad the writing is for her. She treats Obi-Wan like garbage, brings out the worst in him, acts very arrogantly about just about everything and never has to take responsibility for her own mistakes so she gets to die a martyr.

Aleksander Kallus: Literally has to have his ENTIRE BACKSTORY retconned so he can be "redeemed" within the span of one episode. Also manages to "All Lives Matter" Zeb into thinking that judging Imperials for their fascist choices is the same as judging an ENTIRE SPECIES on the actions of one individual who was acting in self-defense anyway. Stop saying he's got the best redemption arc in Star Wars, it sucks fucking ass and he's not a fucking Fulcrum, he just stole the title from Ahsoka and didn't earn it and he was a shit spy anyway.

Crosshair: Bigoted dickhead who treats everyone like complete crap and then goes full fascist as a punishment for the world when no one wants to risk their lives to save him. Let him die already, he's not worth saving.

Bode Akuna: Basically just Anakin lite and we all know how I feel about Anakin. No sob story justifies anything he's done and I didn't find him all that interesting or sympathetic, personally.

Rafa and Trace Martez: I actually loved them, I thought they had an interesting relationship with each other and with Ahsoka, I appreciated how different they felt and the arc Ahsoka goes on with them. I don't mind that they used them to showcase the rising anti-Jedi sentiment among the citizens of Coruscant, I just wish their opinions hadn't been presented as though they were right. I love that we see they've joined a rebellion of sorts post-Order 66 and I wish we'd gotten to see more of Trace, Rafa, and Rex working together rather than the absolute trashfire that we're actually getting on TBB.

Ahsoka Tano: Relationship status: It's complicated. I DO like her, generally, but I REALLY dislike the way she's constantly written in later stuff to be better than everyone else and to have basically zero flaws so that she can end up like a messiah or a goddess of light reborn or something. It's boring, it's annoying, and it just isn't any good. I particularly don't care for how she consistently gets utilized to bash the Jedi Order and absolve Anakin for all of his sins. Ahsoka deserves better, but I'm also immensely frustrated with where her story's taken her and the way fandom tends to treat her. We also just straight-up need more main female Jedi characters and as long as Ahsoka's around it feels like it'll never happen.

Sabine Wren: I love the Rebels version of her, but the Ahsoka show version sucks. I have decided it simply does not exist for Sabine. That isn't the real Sabine and it never will be. That's not Sabine's story, the real Sabine would never try to be a Jedi because quite simply she doesn't NEED to be. And the real Sabine would NEVER disrespect Ezra's sacrifice by undoing it and then leaving him to deal with the fallout. It's stupid, it's ugly, and Sabine deserved better.

Hera Syndulla: Much like Sabine, I love the Rebels version of her, but the Ahsoka version sucks. The Ahsoka version deserves to be kicked out of the army or whatever, she's a terrible mother and an even worse General and quite honestly not that great of a friend. The real Hera would NEVER act like orders didn't matter just because she doesn't like them or refuse to see the logic in letting go of Ezra after he's been missing for 10 years so that those resources can go to people who they can confirm are still alive.

Shin Hati: She's so so so boring. She has the personality of cardboard, it basically consists of "crazy eyes" and that's about it. She is pretty literally just Darth Maul but a girl. Like every single part of her character so far is indistinguishable from Maul aside from the cosmetic stuff. I hope she dies in season 2 and never gets a redemption arc. I'd say Sabine deserves better, but honestly Ahsoka!Sabine deserves her.

Grey Jedi: Stop trying to make fetch happen. It's not going to happen. Let Grey Jedi stay in fanon where it belongs, none of your faves are Grey Jedi in canon and they never will be.

#anti anakin #anti anakin skywalker #anakin critical #anakin skywalker critical #padme critical #padme amidala critical #anti padme #anti padme amidala #satine critical #satine kryze critical #anti satine #anti satine kryze #obitine critical #anti obitine #anti anidala #anidala critical #bo-katan kryze critical #bo-katan critical #anti bo-katan #anti bo-katan kryze #crosshair critical #anti crosshair #anti shin #anti shin hati

[purpleheartskies]

I recently came across these quote:

" 'Be the bigger person' is bullshit advice. My bigness is not determined by my capacity to quietly absorb bullying, degradation, and abuse."

"In the toxic family, we're often told to be the better person... with someone who is refusing to be the better person."

After s5, Robby's popularity grew a lot because many fans started "liking" Robby more. The thing is, before s5, many didn't "like" Robby at all, as in empathizing with Robby and understanding all of his nuances as a character. So, now it's seems that they just "like" that he's seemingly not going to be a problem in the obviously toxic blended "family" that they've always wanted for Johnny and Miguel.

Even some of the fans that have generally "liked" Robby the whole time, proudly say that Robby decided to be the "bigger person". Again, it seems to be about wanting Johnny and Miguel to keep their relationship intact, while Johnny gets Robby in whatever form Johnny can. A compliant, people-pleasing Robby is the Robby of choice, especially because Johnny and Miguel haven't changed so of course Robby must become the compliant, "bigger person".

As if people don't see the blatant psychological, emotional, and even physical abuse that Johnny subjected Robby to in s5 for his own gain. s5 was another season that Johnny very obviously chose Miguel and his family over Robby. It really is a choice to ignore Johnny's toxic behavior in s5 and throughout the whole series. In fact, some even agree that Johnny mistreated Robby in s5, but also say that Robby is okay with it now so they're okay with it too... and then they happily talk about what they hope to see next for Johnny and the Diazs. Like I said, it's a choice to brush it all off.

And it's not like Robby didn't speak out at all in s5. Robby tried to, but Johnny kept putting him in situations that he eventually complied. People-pleasing (fawning) is not being the "bigger person". People-pleasing is a trauma response and a defense mechanism.

Robby got upset with Johnny for lying and tricking him into a father-son trip, but Robby stopped speaking out because Johnny dumped him at a bus stop to get home on his own, while Johnny went off to make sure Miguel got home safe while Carmen stayed home safe, even though Miguel had chosen to go to Mexico on his own while Johnny had lied and manipulated Robby into going there and even admitted he did it because he needed Robby's help finding Miguel.

After they returned from the trip, Robby made it clear that he didn't want to be friends with Miguel. He clearly defined his boundaries and said that Johnny and Miguel have their relationship and he just wanted his space from it, but Robby stopped speaking out because Johnny has no respect for Robby's boundaries and put himself, Miguel, the baby, and Carmen above Robby. Johnny doesn't care about who is at fault for the rivalry or the school fight (Miguel) and who continued the rivalry in s5 (Miguel). Robby had no choice but to fight so that Miguel could hurt him, like he's always wanted to, before accepting him. Robby had to be excited like Miguel was about the baby so that Johnny wouldn't abandon Robby again. Robby had to ask for permission from Carmen to have dinner with his own dad. Later, when Robby indirectly commented about Johnny not giving fatherly advice to him but only to Miguel, Robby had to pass the comment off as a joke because Johnny immediately got upset and dismissed him.

Robby stopped speaking out because he's not allowed to. Johnny chipped away at whatever resolve Robby had. Robby had to be the perfect son so that Johnny would allow Robby to continue to be in Johnny's life.

(These are general thoughts and not directed at anyone in particular.)

#cobra kai is robby's story #robby keene

[roxygen22]

Still Here (Chapter 9)

Summary: Your ex calls and throws off your evening. You and Timothée make love for the first time (again), and you finally say the three little words he's been dying to hear.

C/W: Conversation with toxic ex; NSFW (oral and consensual/protected p-in-v sex, denied orgasm)

Catch up on previous chapters here.

You walked into the town's elementary school and were immediately hit by a wave of nostalgia. It was the same one you attended, after all, though the hallways seemed much smaller (or normal, really) as an adult. Madison walked alongside you to the office to register for the upcoming school year.

"Oh, that was my classroom for 3rd grade. Ms. Hobbs was my favorite teacher. She had a knack for making stories come alive. She would decorate the classroom based on what we were reading at the time. Oh, we had SO much fun when we read Charlie and the Chocolate Factory! I found the golden ticket and got to pick a prize out of the treasure bin."

Madison barely acknowledged your story with a "uh-huh" as she looked around, nervously biting her lip.

"I figured that would get more of a reaction out of you given your current obsession with Wonka," you said as you playfully nudged her arm with your elbow.

"Huh? Oh, sorry, Mom. I'm just thinking about my old school. And my friends."

You stopped walking and gave her a hug. "I know how hard it was for me to move across the country and start at a new school, and I was an adult. Well, a teenaged adult, but still. I can only imagine how you are feeling at the moment. If you want to talk about it, I'm all ears. And I'm sure Nana, Pawpaw, and even Timothée would say the same." You squeezed her to you once more. "You're a likeable girl, Madison. You'll make new friends here. And at least you know Emerie already." She just nodded, so you kept your nostalgia as you continued to the office to finish paperwork.

Evening arrived and Timothée came to pick you up for a date. It was a fantastic feeling to have your relationship out in the open now. Your mom was even supportive despite her earlier comments about sparing his feelings. Madison was sitting outside on the porch swing reading a book when he came up the steps.

"Hey, kiddo!" you heard him say cheerily through the front door. You had heard him drive up and got up to let him in, but once you saw the two talking you wanted to give them some space.

"Hey." Madison put her book down.

"I heard you got to see your new school today. What'd you think?"

"It's...small."

Timothée laughed and sat beside her. "I'm sure it's very small compared to what you are used to."

"At least I won't have a lot of new names to memorize," she side-eyed him and smirked.

"That's one way to look at it!" He bumped her arm with his. "Alright, I'm going to go say hi to your grandparents and mom."

Timothée lightly rapped on the door as he let himself in. You slightly startled him with your presence right by the door, but he quickly regained his senses and greeted you with a kiss. As he stepped around to say hello to your parents, your phone rang. It was your ex, Michael.

"Hello?" you answered in a questioning tone.

"I'm calling to talk to Madison."

"Oh, uhh, I'm about to go out, but I can give her the phone for a few minutes while I finish getting ready."

"Go out? Like on a date?"

"Not that it's any of your business, but yes." You made frustrated eye contact with Timothée and mouthed "Michael" as you walked to your bedroom. He followed and leaned against the doorway with his arms crossed.

"It IS my business to know who is spending time with my child," he groused.

You felt your ears heat up and your lip curl. "Like you gave me the same courtesy when you started seeing Katie," you spat. "Besides, you hardly reach out to make contact with YOUR child. You can't just call on a whim and demand to talk to her after weeks of radio silence."

"Just let me talk to her."

You muted the phone and grabbed a pillow from your bed to scream into. Despite how much you just wanted to hang up on Michael, you never wanted Madison to say that you kept her away from him. You squeezed past Timothée and walked to the front porch.

"Maddy, your dad is on the phone." She looked up at you in confusion that was quickly replaced with excitement. She grabbed for the phone.

"Daddy?" You couldn't hear what he was saying on the other end, but you heard her start listing off some of the fun things she had done since moving out here. You went back inside but only closed the screen door so you could easily hear if you needed to intervene.

Timothée was sitting on the couch. "What did he want?" he asked attitudinally.

"He just randomly wanted to talk to Madison, I guess."

"Where does he come off questioning you about you personal life?" You just shrugged, unsure of where Michael's behavior was stemming from. A few minutes later, Madison came in and handed you the phone.

"Here, he wants to talk to you again."

You took the phone back and held it to your ear. "Hello?"

"Who is Timothy? Isn't he the guy who dumped you in high school? Is the dating pool in that tiny ass town so small out that you have to resort to your own leftovers?" You didn't validate his insane line of questioning with a response. "Whatever. Why is Madison around him so much? He is basically all she talked about. What kind of influence is that blue-collar, good for noth-"

"Don't you DARE talk about him like that." Your voice was dripping with venom. You jumped up from the couch and stormed out onto the porch. Your mother, upon hearing your tone, took Madison into the kitchen to keep her occupied.

"I do not owe you an explanation for how I choose to fix what you broke," you continued. "EVERYTHING I do, I think about Madison first. Can you say the same? I ran into Timothée a couple of weeks after we got back into town, and yes we reconnected. But you know what. She probably likes him because he has spent more quality time with her in the past two months than you have in the past two YEARS. HE shows an interest in her. HE checks in on her. HE puts her first in our relationship. HE treats her like a human being, and not just to get to me. Because HE is a decent human being. Next time you want to talk to Madison, coordinate a date and time first. I am no longer available to cater to your every whim." You hung up and ran down the steps to the driveway. You angrily walked over to your dad's shed and kicked the tire on the tractor.

"Careful, you could break a toe doing that."

You spun and saw Timothée standing a few paces behind you. You sighed and closed your eyes. "How much did you hear?"

"Enough to confirm that he's an asshole. Though I did enjoy hearing you sing my praises," he smirked.

You laughed wetly as hot tears poured down your face. "I'm sorry that he called right as we were about to head out the door."

"Shh, don't worry about it." Timothée pulled you into a hug and rested his chin on your head. "I know you probably don't feel like eating after getting so worked up. Would you like to come over and chill at my place instead of going out? We can pick up a pizza, snuggle on the couch, and watch a movie"

"That sounds so much better than the original plan right now."

<><><><><> (minors DNI from this point)

Timothée held the door open for you to enter his house. While you had been on the property a couple of times since returning from California, you had yet to go inside his new place. This house was not here when the two of you dated in high school, so you had no idea what the interior looked like.

"Welcome," he said. "Make yourself comfortable. I'll get us a couple of plates."

You walked to the couch and leaned against the back of it. "It's less...'bachelor pad' than I expected," you said through a laugh.

"Ah, well, I cleaned up my act once I started pushing 30." You chuckled. "Bathroom is over there," Timothée pointed, "if you need it." He walked around the counter and couch to the coffee table and grabbed the remote. "Here, why don't you find something to watch while I divvy up the pizza."

You sat down on the couch, took the remote in hand, and started scrolling through Netflix. You still hadn't decided when he sat next to you with the pizza and beer. Still feeling the nostalgia from visiting the school with Madison, you settled on 13 Going on 30. He rolled his eyes.

"What? You told me to choose. I was inspired by your earlier comment about getting your act together at 30."

"I rolled my eyes because of the number of times you made me sit through this movie in high school. Some things never change."

"It's one of my faves!"

"Well, I guess I can appreciate the plot line a little more now. Guy in his 30s eventually gets the girl he pined over as a teen."

"Awww, you're getting sentimental in your old age." You grinned.

Timothée pretended to scowl at you, then booped you on the nose. "Are you going to press play or not?"

Once the two of you finished the pizza, you set the plates aside and curled up next to him. He draped his arm around you, allowing his fingers to lazily drift up and down your arm. As the movie progressed, his hand eventually found its way to the space above your jeans where your shirt had ridden up slightly. You shivered as he grazed the bare skin on your waist. You lifted your head from his shoulder and looked up at him. He seized the opportunity to capture your lips with his.

You hungrily opened your mouth to deepen the kiss. You felt his tongue glide across yours in return. You eagerly shifted to sit in his lap. He reached around and squeezed your ass before sliding his hands under your shirt. At first he just snaked his hands underneath, but then began to pull it up. You sucked in a breath and froze, catching his hand at the hem of your shirt. He pulled back to look at your face with concern.

"Timothée, I- uh, I don't have the same body I did as a teenager."

His face relaxed and he smiled warmly. "[Y/N], you were and still are the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on."

"Yeah, but..." you argued as your insecurities became more evident.

"Let me guess," he interrupted. "Stretch marks? More curves from maturing into a gorgeous woman whose awe-inspiring body has brought life into this world?"

You simply nodded. Your cheeks blushed from the attention.

Timothée pulled you tighter against his body. "Let me love those, too." He stood with your legs still wrapped around him. His hands cupped your ass to support you as he carried you to the bedroom. You wrapped your arms around his neck and clasped a hand in his hair. He placed a knee on his bed and laid you down gently.

"You okay?" he asked as he hovered over you. Your breathing shuddered, but you nodded.

"It's...it's been a while," you whispered.

"Me, too." Timothée gently grazed his lips against yours. Once. Twice. He then tugged at your shirt, and this time you made no move to stop him. He pushed himself up on his arms to take in the sight of you half-naked on his bed.

"Now, why am I more undressed than you?" you teased. You grabbed the hem of his t-shirt and pulled. He sat up and continued to pull it over his head. You sat up on your knees to run your hand down his chest and abs, stopping at the buttons on his jeans.

Timothée grabbed your hips and sucked in a breath in anticipation of your next move. "[Y/N], I want you so badly."

"Not as much as I want you." You both stood and clumsily finished undressing each other while hungrily kissing each other. He snuck a hand between your folds as you freed one leg from your pants. You gasped, having become unaccustomed to the feeling of another's touch. Noticing the reaction, he curled his fingers and rubbed your increasingly sensitive bundle of nerves. You moaned, wrapping your arms around his neck to prevent your collapse.

Just as you started to feel the heat of climax in your core, Timothée pulled away. You whined at the absence of his hand. He flashed a wry smile and licked his fingers. He pressed himself against you and pulled your chin up for a kiss. Then, he backed you up against the bed so your knees buckled, forcing you to lay back. He separated your legs with his body and dipped down onto his knees. You knew what was about to happen, but you were still not prepared for the overwhelming sensation of his warm tongue separating your folds. You involuntarily bucked up into his face. In return, his hands snaked to your hips to pin them down. You moaned and struggled against his grip as the coil inside your belly tightened and tightened. But yet again, he stopped before you could reach your climax.

Timothée reached for the drawer of his nightstand and pulled out a condom. Once sheathed, he picked you up and pulled you further back onto the bed. He hovered briefly, staring into your eyes. "I never thought I would get to have this - have you - again."

"Take me," you breathed. "Please. I'm yours." Maintaining eye contact, he lined himself up and gently pushed in until he filled you completely. You both stilled, reveling in the closeness and allowing you a moment to adjust and accommodate his length. He began to work his hips, rutting up against you. The coil inside you quickly constricted again when he reached between you to rub your sensitive bud until you were finally overcome. Your walls clenched around him as you clung to him with all of your limbs, gasping his name.

After you caught your breath, you cupped his face in your hands and guided him down to kiss you. He continued to slowly grind against you, trying to postpone its inevitable end. You loosened your grip so he could pull back and gaze into your eyes.

"Timothée, I love you," you whispered as you stared into his emerald orbs.

He came undone at your confession.

<><><><><>

Chapter 10

Masterlist

Tag List:

@croatianprincess, @bluizh, @jindongdongie

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