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wall-maria-fritz · 3 years

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Calm the Fuck Down, Itadori

Yuuji Itadori x Jennifer Lawrence

Summary: Where Yuuji manages to drag Megumi and Nobara to a Tokyo Comic Con.

A/N: I took this way too seriously, jeezus.

“Calm the fuck down, Itadori”

Megumi wanted to shoot himself in the foot.

He absolutely loathed conventions.

Especially when you got a bunch of idiots with a complete disregard for deodorant and personal space simping around in costumes as if they aren’t fully grown men.

Idiots like Itadori, who was currently wasting his life savings on X-Men stickers.

“Yeah,” Nobara piped in, already side-eyeing a man in a green cape with white and blue wings, and funny looking swords that look like box cutters—he was asking her if he could take a picture with her Petra Ral look.

Who the fuck is Petra Ral anyway? Nobara is SURE she looks way cuter though.

“How are you still so gaga over X-Men anyway?” she continues, with a flip of her ginger hair. “You’re literally a sorcerer, Yuuji. You fight curses in real life.”

Almost like whiplash, Yuuji turns on Nobara with an intensity she’s only seen in battle.

“Never. Disrespect X-Men.”

Yuuji was wide eyed; one hand pointing at Nobara, another clutching a handful of stickers and keychains (when did he buy those?) with a very blue woman on them.

Is she… naked? Nobara wonders, but is immediately interrupted by Yuuji’s incoming sermon.

“X-Men is a poignant commentary on society, Kugisaki. It is a masterpiece that only people with taste can appreciate, with characters so well written—“

But Yuuji’s fanboying gospel was cut short when a smattering of whoops and applause erupted from onstage, as a man dressed as… Thanos in a thong—Thongos, he called himself. Ok.—officially started the day’s most awaited event, and that was to meet X-Men’s Hollywood actors, in the flesh!

It was then that Megumi verbalized what everyone was thinking at this point.

“I didn’t know Itadori knew what ‘poignant’ meant”

Yuuji Itadori raced towards the front of the crowd like it was an orgasm out of reach, tightly clutching onto the barricade (also like he was clutching his [redacted]).

He didn’t know when and how his friends managed to catch up to him, but when X-Men’s glittering line up of beautiful people came out on stage, both Nobara and Megumi looked to each other in complete understanding beside him-- of course Itadori was here to simp for Jennifer Lawrence.

And of course he’d spend every yen to his name just to catch a glimpse of this woman in nothing but a skin-tight blue spandex that left no curve nor valley to the imagination.

“I LOVE YOU JENNIFER LAWRENCE”

Yuuji proceeded to fucking shriek in broken English.

“I EAT AMERICAN FOOD FOR YOU”

Megumi and Nobara both took a step from Yuuji.

‘Nope! The weird guy? They don’t know him.’

To their horror, they watch a grinning mouth appear at Yuuji’s cheek, already salivating.

“Gotta give it to ya, punk. That IS one fine ass,”

Sukuna’s mouth let its long tongue lick around his lips.

“I hope you got us some backstage passes, kid”

Megumi and Nobara shivered.

But clearly, Itadori and Sukuna weren’t the only ones going absolutely bananas for the X-Men, it might have very well been the entire building cheering for the cast.

It was until a bald guy in a wheelchair signaled for the audience to quiet down, did the sea of sweaty geeks calm down.

After a few introductions, and further hyping, the mic was finally passed to Jennifer Lawrence, whose character was apparently named Mystique.

Like a child showing off to his parents, Yuuji looks at Megumi and Nobara, pointing at Jennifer Lawrence as if saying, “Look! It’s her! That’s her! It’s actually her!”

Yuuji then proceeds to kiss three fingers raised up like he was doing a Boy Scout’s pledge, and raised those three fingers in there air, whistling three drawn out notes.

The idiot was giving her the Hunger Games salute, Jesus fucking Christ.

“Ehehe. Yeah, show her which fingers you’re gonna fuck her with,” Sukuna chuckles.

Which Yuuji responds to by forcibly jockeying Sukuna’s mouth off his cheek, shutting the curse up;

Yuuji Itadori drinks enough Respect Women Juice to give the Sahara a year of rain, alright.

Soon, everyone was giving Jennifer the salute.

Jennifer waves away the salutes, and stage-whispers into the mic with that raspy and sexy, according to Yuuji, voice of hers, and says, “Psst! Wrong fandom guys!”

The crowd laughs, as Jennifer awkwardly prattles about how she’s contract-bound to only talk about X-Men today, and that she really needs her job, ok?

And to be honest? Megumi and Nobara are starting to like her! I mean, who wouldn’t? Jennifer’s such a sweet, and down-to-earth girl. They’re glad that if there was anyone Yuuji was going to simp for, it’s Jennifer Lawrence.

“It’s such an honor to meet you, Tokyo!” Jennifer greets charmingly. “I was so excited to meet you guys, I didn’t even need to take a shot before I got here!” Jennifer shrugs with an exaggerated look on her face.

The crowd ate it all up.

“In fact, I was SO excited that I pumped myself up with enough anime references to say,” and in that magical moment, Jennifer Lawrence send finger guns down Yuuji’s way and winks--

“That’s one HECK of a JJK cosplay, man!”

And oh my Lord, it was like Yuuji died and went to heaven.

Even Sukuna was speechless.

But if Yuuji had to guess, Sukuna might have even been proud of him if only wasn’t you know, a jackass.

Megumi and Nobara couldn’t really remember what happened for the rest of the segment, because they might as well have leashed Yuuji with the way he was going crazy for Jennifer, hollering to her that he got her lasagna and Cheetos in his backpack in more broken English.

In the end, the two are left to rein Yuuji in as he eagerly waits for Jennifer out the backstage entrance, fully armed with an X-Men comic book and that lasagna he promised.

Yuuji was practically vibrating in excitement.

“Yuuji, it’s been two hours. Let’s go back to campus,” Nobara groaned, moaning to Megumi how Gojo better pay for their babysitting hours.

“She's almost out, you guys--!” Yuuji cries back, as the stage doors finally open to reveal Jennifer Lawrence in a much more sensible outfit of dress pants and a smart, low-neckline blouse.

“Eyes up, Itadori,” Megumi mumbles at Yuuji, who was already getting slack jawed at the sight of Jennifer’s cleavage.

Yuuji swallows the massive lump in his throat, and snaps his eyes back up to Jennifer’s hooded ones.

“Oh hey! You’re that JJK guy!” Jennifer greets good-naturedly. She was smiling radiantly at Yuuji and his friends, first shaking Nobara and Megumi’s hands as she laughed, “Damn, you even dressed up as the main character’s friends! You’re all like Hermione, Ron, and Harry Potter except… well, your characters won’t actually die, eep”

“Do we tell her?” Nobara nudges Megumi.

“Don’t you dare.” Megumi hisses back.

The dark-haired sorcerer then turns to Jennifer with a polite smile, and says in perfect English,

“Ooh, we’ll try not to spoil it for you, Jennifer.”

Nobara snaps her head to Megumi.

“Since when did you speak White???”

“Shut the fuck up, Nobara,” Megumi grits out.

Jennifer winked at Megumi, giving him an ‘I-get-you’ look and finally turned to sign Yuuji's comic book, only for him to freeze.

They both blinked at each other for a moment. One almost as awkward as the other.

Jennifer Lawrence though, god bless her, took this all in stride.

“No worries, dude, I freeze up, too,” she says while pretending to freeze up in jest. “Do you want me to sign your comic book?”

And if Yuuji wasn’t absolutely head over heels in love with Jennifer before, he certainly was now.

“I-- I…” Yuuji stammered.

Megumi and Nobara looked worriedly to their friend, there was no way in hell they were gonna let Yuuji fuck up now. Not after a whole afternoon of body odor and overpriced tentacle art, no way.

“Calm the fuck down, Itadori and give her the comic,” Megumi whispers to Yuuji.

And in a snap, Yuuji Itadori was bowing as low as possible, arms out with his offerings, exclaiming to the highest simping power-- “I BROUGHT YOU YOUR FAVORITE JENNIFER!”

Jennifer’s face lit up at the sight of the lasagna, “Oh wow! You got me food! Thanks for remembering!”

She takes the lasagna gratefully, and quickly signs the comic, “What’s your name?”

“Errr… Y-Yuuji.”

Jennifer returns the comic book to Yuuji, now signed--

‘Thank You for the Lasagna, Yuuji! You know me soooo well!

Stay Sweet <3

-J Law.’

And as if each and every one of Yuuji’s dreams came true, Jennifer leaned forward and gave Yuuji a quick peck on the cheek.

Yuuji couldn’t even react, because in a whirlwind, Nobara was taking a picture of Yuuji and Jennifer, a coral kiss mark on Yuuji’s wide-eyed face.

“Calm the fuck down, Itadori,” Megumi groaned for probably the hundredth time now.

But Yuuji didn’t care.

Jennifer Lawrence just kissed him.

He’s pretty sure he can be a little manic with disbelief.

“Yuuji, I swear to god, if you don’t stop, I’m deleting the photo from my phone.”

Nobara was done.

“NO--”

In the end, Yuuji may not have anything to eat for the next two weeks, but it was totally worth it.

He managed to convince Megumi to lend him some money.

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sevensided · 3 years

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how did you get into writing fic? i'd love to start but idk even where to begin! I loved adats so I was wondering do you have any advice?

Oh my goodness! I am so flattered you’ve asked me this. Yes, I can absolutely help. I’ll throw a bunch of rambling under the cut.

I started writing fic probably when I was... sixteen years old? A lot of my early works were oneshots. I couldn’t figure out how to do anything plot heavy for the life of me, so I just stuck to AUs or whatever I felt like. I wasn’t in any particular fandom -- I really wrote whatever I had ideas for. I remember I tried once to do a plot-heavy story and I received a review absolutely ripping it to shreds. Like, it was so cruel I cried lol. I ended up deleting the fic. Years later, I get what they were trying to say (basically, more substance, less style), but at the time it cut to the quick. Really, it was only when I was in my twenties that I started writing work that was longer and/or better.

The fandom that helped me actually write plot heavy work was a historical-based fandom. As I’m a historian, it was perfect. I got to use my research skills and knowledge to create works that, above all, aimed to feel authentic. I mainly read historical fiction, so I was familiar with how that genre worked. Miraculously, people loved my work. I think I wrote about ~200k in the period of a year? These were several short stories (20-40k) and a few oneshot filler fics. While I was part of this fandom I also helped organise a Big Bang which was a lot of hard work but was extremely rewarding. Along with that, I interacted mainly with other fic writers, so I spent a lot of time chatting to people about ideas and encouraging other writers, and it just created a lovely medley where no concept was impossible or any line of dialogue too difficult. We supported each other and it was truly like a little commune. I gradually stepped away from the fandom mainly because it was just a part of my life at a very specific time, and almost as soon as that time was over, my love for that story/ship faded, but I firmly believe I figured out a lot of how/what I do now purely through that experience.

Regarding ADATS

With ADATS, it stemmed entirely from wanting to “explain” three months in canon (at the end of season three). I was interested in the idea of season four setting up Will/Mike in canon, and I wanted to test the source material to see if I could draw from what already existed to create something authentic. I began with that simple idea: what happened from July to October in 1985? Then I thought about the major themes I wanted to hit -- family, friendship, coming of age, sexuality -- and I nested them around the bigger concept: how do I get Mike from being ostensibly straight to realising he is gay? That meant thinking of two steps: Mike discovering his attraction to guys; Mike discovering his attraction to Will. Those two concepts were separate “arcs” that needed addressing in different ways. Balance was key to weaving them together and making the reader feel like they knew what was coming (and that they felt smart for putting the pieces together) without just rushing through and going “now kiss!” That’s partly why ADATS needs a sequel, lol: because it’s not finished!

Writing process

The first thing I do when I start to get an idea is I write it down. Sounds obvious. But when you have a killer line of dialogue come to you in the shower and you think “I’ll remember that” -- reader, you will not remember it. You gotta get it down ASAP! I do that the whole way through, as generally I’ll be thinking of scenes I’m stuck on and then it’ll just come to me and I’ll quickly jot it down.

The next thing -- or what I do in the meantime -- is start structuring. I plan. I try to plan a lot. Sometimes it’s okay to write “and something happens here to get them here”, because you’ll figure it out later, but for the most part I’ve discovered that planning is like gold and you can’t get enough of it. I break my work up into generally 3-4 parts/sections, and I treat each section like a mini story. So each part needs a conflict and resolution, and it needs to flow into the next section. You need to have a feeling of things evolving and maturing. Once I’ve planned those little bits, I start thinking about the bigger plot arc and how I can drop in hints along the way. I’m probably not a subtle or skilled enough writer to yet pull off that sort of gasping twist you get in really excellent books, but I’m trying to get there. It’s hard, is what I’m trying to say, but that’s okay, because we’re all learning.

Then I generally do aesthetic stuff. Sounds stupid, probably. But nothing helps me get more into a mood than doing a Pinterest board or -- most of all -- making a Spotify mix. I start thinking about the vibe and the general atmosphere, and then I almost exclusively listen to that mix when I’m working. Sort of like muscle memory? Just to get the creative juices associated with that particular selection of songs.

Another thing I’ll do along with plot structure is character structure. This is a biggie. I mean, a story is nothing without characters. So I’ll just jot down a bunch of bullet points of characters and particular aspects that I want to highlight or remember. I hate continuity errors in fiction. Like, if someone says they work on Maple Street but later in the fic they’re working on Pine Street. I hate that. So I keep note of specific things that my main character might notice at repeated points in the story (colours, places, smells, names, sounds -- so they’re all consistent even as the narrative evolves). That’s another thing -- your characters’ motivations. Not everyone is going to be a huge player, but they all do serve a purpose. The most important character is obviously your main character. I personally think it’s important to let your M.C. be an arse at times. They’re going to be mean, they’re going to misinterpret things or fly off the handle... just let ‘em. Let them be wretched humans, and then bring them back and make them realise what they’ve done. Let them learn! I love consequences in fiction, lol.

At the same time, I’ll probably start writing. We’ve already written down some snippets of neat dialogue or descriptions, but now we should start the actual process. For me, I used to start at the beginning. Usually this was the most fleshed out anyway: I’ll have a clear idea of the beginning and the end, but nothing in the middle. These days, if I have a scene in mind that I can’t forget, I’ll just write it. It will possibly get scrapped or rewritten, but that’s okay, because at least you’ve got it down and now you can devote your brain power to something useful (like figuring out what the middle is supposed to be). I’ll have half a dozen of totally out of context scenes just littered in my Word document that I’ll add to as I go along. Eventually, though, you’re going to start writing properly, and that’s when you write your opening scene.

Opening scenes: super important. Every time I write a scene I think: what is the point of this? What do I want the reader to learn or takeaway? Sometimes you do have filler scenes, but they also serve a different purpose (perhaps to establish a group dynamic or to explore/describe a character’s surroundings). Mainly, though, every scene should push something forward in some way, whether it’s character development or a plot point. So, with an opening scene, I always think you have to establish: where you are; who you are; what they are doing; where they’ve come from (in a philosophical and practical sense); and where they’re going (ditto). That doesn’t have to happen in the first paragraph -- that would be silly. But if you sprinkle that information in over time it’ll gradually build up a picture of your character and that way the reader can get an idea of who they are. You basically need to give a snapshot of what your story is about. This also goes back to the character creator stuff: where they are at the start should be different to where they end up. How that happens is, of course, because of plot, and because you’ve structured everything to the nth degree, we’ve got a very clear progression of that character’s growth (/s easier said than done lol).

General advice

Write down everything: every idea, a bit of dialogue, a description, whatever. Write it down. Doesn’t have to be neat. Just has to be on paper. You can’t remember everything, so if you’re spending time trying to hold those things in your head, it’s taking up space for new ideas to come along.

Structure, plan, structure, plan. Sometimes it’s boring and I hate it. Other times, when I’ve not written in a few days and I open the Word doc and think wtf is this supposed to be, I am very grateful for Past Me for leaving such detailed notes. Seriously, it helps so much. Oneshots don’t really need planning, in my experience. You just get those out there. But multi-chaptered stories really do, even ones that “just” focus on a relationship.

Whatever you want to write, commit to it. Space goblins invade Hawkins? Do it. Eleven and Max find themselves in a cult akin to Midsommar (2019) and must escape? Yes. Just... whatever you want to do, remember that you’re writing it for you. Write what most interests you, what makes you when you reread it go AHHHHH I LOVE THIS!! Because that makes it a thousand times easier to actually get on with the writing when you enjoy what you’re doing.

Write a lot. Every day, if you can, or at least at designated times. Occasionally I have a very specific headspace/vibe I have to be in, but sometimes it just hits me and I’ll say to my partner “I need to write now” and just disappear, lol. The more you write the more you write. It’s so, so, so true. Cannot emphasise this enough. When I wrote that ~200k in twelve months? It was because I literally wrote every. day. Or near enough. Remember that some days you’ll write 200 words, and other days you’ll write 20k (this happened to me with ADATS -- part of the reason I finished it so quickly was because I had sprints of writing 10k+ at a time that only happened because I was in the rhythm of it). Write, write, write. Who cares if it’s crap! No one will see it until you are ready. In the meantime, just write!

Probably last of all (although I could go on and on) is connect with other writers. If you’re struggling to start, sometimes just talking about it can help a huge amount. I hope it goes without saying that you can message me whenever you want, anon or not, and I will talk to you. We can talk about ideas or I can beta stuff, whatever you want! Find like-minded people and talk to them about what you want to do. Another thing this helps is in advertising your work when you do publish. I see a lot of first time fic writers get super down because they publish their magnum opus on AO3 but no one comments. Honestly, it’s because no one knows you’ve published! You don’t have to be tooting your own horn every which way, but just actively talking about your work and even collaborating with other content creators with get you hyped and other people too (and the input and encouragement other fandom members give is just... out of this world. Anon messages helped me finish ADATS when I was really worried I wouldn’t [that’s the truth]. Seriously, support is everything). When you have people excited about your work, you get excited. It’s really as simple as that.

I could go on but this is already horrendously long. I hope even a bit of this helps! If you want to chat or have any more questions, just hit me up any time.

#writing tips #writing help #writing advice #answered #i really hope this helps/answers your question!#i can do something more structured if you want #otherwise here are just my initial thoughts #Anonymous

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samkat10423 · 3 years

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Another town

Did I ever tell you guys that I have the attention span of a gnat? Well, I do. Which is why I’m in a new world. Yes, I know. Christmas in Cape Garner….blah, blah, blah! I like that world. Yes, I do! But the lots! There is nothing for the single sim. And I don’t play legacies. (The attention span of a gnat, remember?) So, I have moved on.

And because my brother and I have been binging on supernatural movies lately – and I’ve been binge-reading fantasy too! – I decided to do a supernatural Christmas. But Moonlight Falls – while pretty – sucks. EA knows NOTHING about small towns – real or otherwise. But thankfully Dutchiesims to the rescue!

I’ve done this world before, so I have a bunch of saved lots. Some I’m using, some I’m not. The above lot, is one of them that I decided to replace. There’s nothing wrong with it, I suppose. I just don’t need a relics store and a separate book store and whatever else it had.

Instead, I’m replacing it with my salon/tattoo lot. I did it before on 2 separate lots, but this time I decided to use a little lot over on My Sims Realty called the Simmer Retreat Salon and Tattoo. (Seen here!) The first time I played the EA version of this world, it was the lot I used in lieu of EA’s salon lot. It comes on a 30x20 lot and this spot was 30x40. So…. I pulled the lot all the way to the front edge, which gave me a 20x30 space in the back. Anyway their lot comes with a basement – which I deleted. I made the area that led down to it, into a barber shop. I also got rid of one of the styling stations inside and made a sewing room with that little sewing machine that actually works and gives your sim skill points. Outside, I changed the awning and lights, and the sidewalk.

But mostly I left it alone because 1). I like it, and 2). I was really interested in doing something with the back.

So, here it is. And I apologize up front about the photos. But taking decent shots was next to impossible because it’s a really tight space.

Anyway, this first building was originally going to be an ice cream shop. But then I ordered pizza for dinner and thought, my sims need a pizzeria too! And I have the oven, so why not. So I changed my color-scheme.

And here it is!

I’ll continue this in a 2nd post - because Tumblebutt hates me. And there’s still a bunch of pictures to see.

#sims 3 Dutchiesims New Moonlight Falls Grey Harbor lots by me!

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allthetribbles · 4 years

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An Explosive Performance - March 30, 2085

Following the fall of the Pit, security patrols around Seattle are heavily ramped up. With the release of unknown sorcerers, parapsychics, and other creatures, all reports are being investigated - no matter how minor they seem. Alan is given a few extra psych visits due to the reports turned in from the Pit, but... he isn't taken away. There is a lack of personnel and we just can't afford to take someone out of action.

Liv receives a message on the 30th and follows its orders. Rather than following the orders of a secondary note, she brings the retrieved artifact to the Director. Unfortunately he's in a meeting. It takes about half hour before the door is opened and two people walk out - the head of the military and the GIA. The military agent gives Liv a once-over before he walks out.

Liv asks the Director for some of his time, immediately. He says ok and she enters his office and closes the door. This garners a very... surprised look from the Director. Liv quickly takes out the notes and places them on his desk, dissolving into a babble of almost incoherent information. A note meant for the Director came across her desk, with little time to inform and scout the location, she took it upon herself to go in his place. She had concerns that it was a ruse to draw him out and kill him. She places the still-wrapped artifact on his desk.

He offers her a drink, makes a call to Bobby to get him to come down and verify whether what she picked up was the real deal or not. It takes about twenty minutes before Bobby is escorted to the office... with two guards placed outside the door. Liv is still inside. Bobby greets Liv, looks at the artifact and confirms it's real.

Bobby tells Elwood to seal it somewhere because having it here is "bad juju." Elwood will arrange for transport for the artifact out of the office and someplace safe. Liv is dismissed. While the Director is glad that it worked out well, if it happens again find and tell him first.

All in all, it took roughly an hour to an hour and a half before Liv is out of the office. The team looks at Liv curiously, Kory asked what happened - Liv tells her "You don't want to know." Te'ani approaches Liv - "You don't want to know. I was there and even I don't want to know what happened." He gives her space...

Kory gets a call at her desk - a report from dock workers about a creepy old dude and monsters. She asks if we have the authority to check it out - indeed we do! Alan tells everyone that he'll be working without arcane sight. Liv drives to the docks since our favorite pilot is out of commission for the time being.

We meet the worker who reported the incident - Tim Dane. He was loading and saw the ruckus about five or six warehouses down. He got worried and called us. When he got back outside, there wasn't anything there anymore.

Checking out the location - there are a lot of shell casings - A LOT. There is an open door leading in with the definite marks of explosives, weapon fire, and claw marks...

Kory is concerned that maybe the worker didn't give us all of the information and goes back to probe his mind. What the worker saw - A guy that looks like Professor Farnsworth (we identified him as The Ghoul by his description) yelling at a guy with a beard and pointing at the door of a white van. The worker finishes loading up and looks back again to see a monster leaping out of the van. He turns around, hearing noises like car backfire, but faint (which could possibly be gunfire). He returns to the office to hunt for the card with the muffled noise in the back.

The first thing that Te'ani sees entering the warehouse are two dead bodies - one of which is... Isaac Sage. The other is an unknown female with a massive facial scar. Running her face through recognition, it identifies her as Isabella Kachowski - a Russian native presumed dead around seven years ago when the Migou invaded Russian. Te'ani asks Liv to turn on the pips to see what they can find - Liv refuses, stating there are usually security measures against that and if there IS any information it, it would take someone with more expertise than hers to get it out.

Looking around the warehouse, there is a formerly "secret doorway" heading underground. Formerly because it is has been blasted open. Inside they can smell the gunpowder wafting from below. Te'ani leads the way down - it is four stories, but they keep only one story between them.

Downstairs looks like a small warzone and we can see everything - blood splatter, bodies, explosive residues... claw marks. At the end of the stairwell is a doorway approximately six feet wide by eight feet tall. The lights are on and there are bodies everywhere - the closest one is a female that's been burnt alive with a rifle. Most of them have been shot, but others have been dismembered. No monsters - all human, nazzadi or amlati. Most are armed with guns - and there are bullet holes everywhere.

At this point, we decide to call in backup - Kory makes the call to the Director, who has the military and other teams called in. With recent activity, he's not taking any chances.

There is an arena in the middle of the area with cameras pointed inside - it seems to be a blood sport arena, but no way to get into the arena.

There are several doorways/openings leading off of this initial room and the team decides to investigate. The first leads to a corridor with doors every ten feet or so. Looking in, each one opens up to a well-furnished two story apartment. In one of them, there are three bodies - one in bed and two others shot at the door. The second one leads to an armoury, the third a cafeteria.

The fourth door leads to an office. Inside the office is a map of Seattle with a bunch of pins - we all take pictures on our pips. Te'ani attempts to puzzle out what the pins represent while Liv heads to the computer terminal. An attempt to access its information is met with hostile resistance. Liv is hesitant to go in deeper - this wasn't what she was looking for, but the server banks for the security cameras.

The pins seem to correspond with different locations across the city - black pins seem to denote OIS, GIA, and military presence in Seattle. Other colors seem to represent the Dionysus club and locations that we have under surveillance - including the apartment complex where Lt. Gen Kareebi's friend resides.

The last door isn't locked and swings open to reveal an inner set of doors. Looking in reveals....

Books. Lots and LOTS of books. Actual PHYSICAL books. Alan is enamoured. While Alan looks through the books - not touching them! He hears a woman's voice asking, "Who are you?"

He brings the voice to our attention - Liv immediately asks, "Where are you?" We follow the voice behind one of the racks.... to a crumbling and half destroyed statue.

The statue turns around, sees us, and says, "Ah shit, OIS."

We find out the name of the "statue" is Luana Savitski. Alan informs us that she's pretty well known in the occult world for the past 20 years, but hasn't been seen in the last ten. She asks if we're going to help her or shoot her.

Te'ani and Liv look around and see the piles of rubble.... well... it's about like trying to piece together a 10,000 piece puzzle without a picture.

Kory asks how long she's been a statue - and how it happened. Luana replies that she's been this way a pretty long time and is the result of several cumulative magical misshaps. We ask if she knows who the attackers were - she doesn't since she can't move outside of the library.

She doesn't seem to know who The Ghoul is, the attackers appeared human as far as she could tell. When she identifies this place as "The Enclave" - Liv immediately jumps in and asks, "The Tager Enclave?" She seems shocked that Liv knows that word and asks where she heard it. "Tuscon, Arizona. Remember the old guy said he was going to attack the Tager Enclave." Luana literally curses a blue streak - cursing several names including "Beaver, Stone, 8Bit, and several others." Liv tells her Stone is dead.

About this time, we wonder where our backup is - and then it arrives. Liv immediately tells them to not shoot - "This is a high priority witness, do NOT kill." They ask who she's talking about - Luana answers. They're surprised a statute talks.

Te'ani asks her "What exactly is a Tager?" Luana gives him a side-eye at the question, telling him, "I don't know if I should answer that."

Alan really wants to be the one to interrogates her.

Liv leaves to find the server room. One of the things most easily noted... there is definitely a malevolent presence in the server. Te'ani called it earlier - it's a TRUE AI.

Limited AI are okay... TRUE AI is banned and majorly illegal. This Tager Enclave has one - but maybe not intentionally...

Liv begins talking to it - asking it to help them find the surveillance so they can find who did this to its friends.

The AI demands to be taken with them and installed on a server, and then it'll help us... or it'll delete everything. Liv asks if a pip will do - it says six will suffice. Unfortunately Liv is at a stalemate for convincing it to come willingly...

They send Kory out to contact the Director - they're in luck! He's on site. Kory gives him the run-down of the situation. The Director states absolutely NOT - we aren't bargaining with a TRUE AI. Kory asks the Director - "What is a Tager?" His reply - "You don't need to know right now.."

He recants his decision and sends her back with the response, "Only if it agrees to be loaded onto a hardline." The Director confirms dead Sage is dead Sage.

Kory finds out her telepathy is blocked, so heads back to the team. She finds once she crosses the threshold of the large door, it's back to working.

She informs Liv of the Director's orders. Liv and the Computer are back to a stalemate - Liv says no hardlines; it wants freedom and demands them. To show them the knowledge it has access to - it brings up a videos of Sage and Weaver talking. And deletes it.

Liv makes the hard decision to kill it since it doesn't want to go quietly. She goes into the system and hunts it down. It takes roughly ten minutes of real world time while Liv spends days hunting this AI down to its last holdout.... a portable pip. She burns it out before coming back to herself.

The librarian is packed up for shipping under heavy guard - unfortunately in pieces. Alan requests of the Director to be able to interrogate her himself. He agrees.

After the fiasco is wrapped up and Alan has his interrogation, back at the office Director Elwood has us follow him to the roof.

He had some final instructions for us - Do research. Find out what's going on and find the other pieces, get them back. The artifact handed to him earlier has been transported off to a safe location. The Thing can absolutely not be allowed to come through, because if it does... no matter where it comes through you can write it off.

Pick any brain we have to - including Bobby's. Liv asks where the Book from the Farm is being held - it has a location and date encoded. Elwood will put in a request for the book as soon as he lands.

Alan is to report to Subdirector LeAnne (Christine LeAnne). She's currently in Phoenix AZ, but heading back.

He'll be gone for three to four days because there are things that need to be done in person. The enclave is a major find for the OIS - it will open many doors for us. He's proud of our team.

He gets onto the transport... it lifts off.

And explodes.

Well...

....

FUCK.

#ctech #ois #liv grasse #game notes #cthulutech

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eloarei · 4 years

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About the process of creating a book (the not-writing part)

I was asked recently about if making a book was easy or tedious or whatever, and I realized that was actually something I’d like to talk about. I’d never done it before (and still I only have a little experience), but I’ve been teaching myself and it’s been... fun? Behind the cut (that’s still a thing, right?), I ramble about formatting, PDFs, fonts, and some other stuff. (Also pictures, though most of them are the same as the ones I posted yesterday.)

First of all, I had to pick a Print-On-Demand (POD) website. That was easy for me, because finding the website was actually what made me want to make the book. I used Lulu.com, which has worked very well for me the two times I’ve used it. (It has a bunch of bad reviews, but honestly I got just what I paid for both times. They apparently offer editing and marketing services; I can’t vouch for those because I only used the POD service. But personally I wouldn’t trust anyone to edit or market my book, let alone some randos on some website. They’re a POD site. That’s what they’re good at, so that’s what I use.) It would have been almost too easy if they just let me copy-paste the text to them, but understandably they wanted a PDF. PDFs are kind of the bane of my existence, but I downloaded a template from them (for a 6x9 inch novel, with appropriate margins) and then copy-pasted my fic into it using LibreOffice. (I’m so-so about LibreOffice, but it does create PDFs reasonably well.) From there... well, then I had to go through the process of reformatting it. I’d copied the text from my AO3, and that meant that it had spaces between every paragraph and no indents, which is how AO3 fics are typically formatted. It was a lot of Tab-Left-Down-Down-Down-Backspace-Backspace-Enter-Repeat. For 140k words, it took a few casual days. After the bulk of that was done, I realized the indents/tabs looked... weird? They were too big. ^^; Luckily there was a setting in LibreOffice to change them all automatically. I almost cried at the thought of having to do it manually haha. Adding data to the headers and footers came next. I chose to only add the page number to the footer, and nothing to the header. Normally people will have the author’s name on one side, and the book’s title on the other, but I skipped that for the time being. Not sure if I’ll do it for the ‘official’ release. (Somehow my footer ended up being too small, so that’s something I need to look into.) Next I had to pick a font and a font size. I decided to do something a little gimmicky: I have alternating chapters that take place in modern and historical times, so I chose different fonts to represent those chapters. For the historical chapters I chose “Century”, which is a serif font (meaning that it has little embellishments, like “Times New Roman”), while for the modern chapters I chose “Verdana”, a sans-serif font (meaning that it is sans/without the embellishments, like whatever font Tumblr uses). It’s typically agreed that novels are best in serif fonts, because it’s easier to read them for a long session. The embellishments make the letters blend together into visually recognizable words, which is apparently how we read, as opposed to looking at every letter individually. However, because I wanted to be quirky, more than half of my book is in sans-serif, which I’m just hoping doesn’t annoy people. I used Verdana size 11 and Century size 12. Even so, the Verdana still looks too large to my eye, so I’ll probably change it again. After that was mostly aesthetic formatting, which was the actual fun part. I tabbed down I think about 10 spaces at the start of every chapter, then went back up a space or two, increased the font size and changed the font to something slightly fancier and wrote the chapter title (which for me were just “Chapter Five”, etc). (UPON FURTHER SCRUTINY, apparently not all of my first chapter pages are tabbed down the same amount. ugh. ^^; They’re close but not identical. How messy.) Under the chapter titles, I simulated “drop caps” on the first phrase of the chapter, because I didn’t have a good drop caps font. I just did this by retyping the whole phrase in caps, and then changing the first letter to a slightly larger font size. Next were a few easy things: a title page, a few silly “praise for” pages of reviews I got from online readers (these probably won’t be in the “official” version; they just make me smile), a mock-up copyright page (mock-up because I don’t actually have a copyright or anything yet), a short dedications page (mine was just one sentence), and then an empty page so that the story text starts on the right, which is standard. I have bought another self-published book which otherwise looks pretty good, but it starts the story on the left page and it’s just so jarring. At that point, the PDF was pretty much done. I added a few other little touches, like some little fancy dagger icons during in-chapter scene transitions. I ended up with the “the end” page being on the left, which, again, is really awkward, so I found a chapter that only had like two lines on the last page, and went back in and deleted a handful of words in the chapter so that it would end on the previous page instead. THEN came the fun but agonizing part, as I’m not as much of a graphic designer as I sometimes wish. I had to make a cover. The other self-published book I bought looks really nice with a beautiful illustration on the front, but the spine and back had just tiny white text, and didn’t even include a synopsis. So I downloaded a template for a 6x9inch wrap-around cover, tossed it up in Photoshop, paint-bucketed it black, and went to work. I pasted in my synopsis in off-white sans-serif font about the same as my internal font, and bolded some of the key words for... ease of skimming and/or funsies? At the top I added a short dialogue exchange from the first chapter that I thought represented the story as a whole, chose a different font that stood out, and gave it a red shadow so it would stand out more. For fun I added some faint red blood-splatters behind the text. For the front I chose a big bold block-letter font in off-white, then gave it a red and a yellow shadow so it would stand out. I rasterized the font (turning it into a picture), and then used the tool to highlight the letters, and splashed some red blood-splatters on them. I did the same for the spine. (Though really what I should have done was copy the logo from the front and resize it. Silly me. Now the two logos don’t match.) I used Unsplash.com for a few free photos that I quickly manipulated into a passable cover art. Ultimately, I would like to have something either professionally photographed, edited, or drawn, but what I found was vaguely similar enough to what I wanted that I figured it’d do for now. Maybe the last thing I had to do (besides uploading it all to Lulu) was decide on a pen-name! I ended up going with L.A.Rayborn, instead of my legal name. I used my legal first two initials, but chose my birth surname (which is twice removed from my legal name, since I was first adopted and then married). To be perfectly honest, the reason I chose not to use my legal name is mostly because I don’t want to associate my in-laws with possibly-sensitive content that they probably wouldn’t like. SO. Then it was done, and I uploaded it to Lulu, and chose a few options on the site, such as cream pages instead of white, and matte exterior finish instead of gloss. (I highly suggest the cream for novels, but the matte is really just personal preference.) I paid them (I ended up getting it printed and shipped to me for under $20), and then about 2 weeks later I had the 400 page darling in my hands, ready to be eviscerated with a set of neon hi-lighters! After this current round of edits, I already know there’s a ton of stuff I’m going to have to fix (and this is to say nothing of the story). 1. The font is slightly too large, but could probably use a 1.5 or maybe 1.2 spacing between lines. I’ll have to fiddle with it, and see what others do. 2. The back cover text is too close to the edges to really look good. 3. The page numbering just looks odd for some reason. 4. Figure out how to get the page numbers to stay off the copyright and dedications page, etc. 5. MORE THAN ANYTHING, I need to change the... I’m not even sure what to call it? I need to make the text space out evenly so that it creates a block on each page, rather than creating messy ridges on the right margins. I didn’t even think of this until I got the book and started comparing it to professional books I’ve read and enjoyed. It seems like a very rookie mistake.

(lol I’m in the process of changing the main character’s name, which is why the crappy MS Paint edits.) PHEW, that was long. But hopefully my journey was at least a little insightful. Please do let me know if you have any thoughts, questions, or suggestions about how I could better format the book for the “real” printing!

#elo talks #self-publishing #elo fics #elo writes a novel

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bigskydreaming · 4 years

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I dont want to intrude on your convo with your friend but I've been reading all your posts about your changelings verse since you started making them. Is the Alicia you mentioned next to Boyd in the poart about the changeling market meant to be Boyd's little sister from TW? What's her change, if you don't mind telling??

LOL no worries, and you’re not intruding, I don’t mind comments or weighing in on any post I make ever, unless its specifically under a cut and I’m like ‘plz dont reblog Im gonna delete this in ten minutes anyway, IM JUST HAVING A MOMENT OKAY’ lolol.

So yeah, you’re fine, and if you follow me because of TW which you obvsly know well enough to recognize Alicia’s name, you probably know how much I love exploring minor or barely ever used characters, haha. Alicia Boyd is no exception and I have a ridiculous number of headcanons and places I’ve used her in various unposted WIPs considering that she made all of one appearance on the show and it was a hallucination/flashback. BUT WHATEVER.

Anyway, Alicia’s Change is one of my faves, and given that she’s such a barely there presence in TW, she’s a character I’m pretty comfortable keeping just as she is in my TW changeling headcanons, when writing the official ‘to be published’ stuff in this ‘verse.

All Changelings’ physical changes and magic are in some way related to their personalities and individual traits, even if that connection isn’t immediately obvious. And even though the Changelings are supernatural in origin, given that their magic reflects who they are and who they are is a product of a 21st century modern society, I wanted some of them to have changes and magic that seems in some ways almost sci-fi or technology based, even while still definitively being magic at its source.

So for no particular reason other than just its my head, I’ll headcanon what I want, I’ve always pictured Alicia as a STEM girl, very much into science and math, and her change and magic ties into that.

Basically, she looks just like she did before she was Changed, so she’s a fourteen year old black girl who’s just a slightly older version of the character we saw briefly on TW….except for the fact that she’s at all times surrounded by what appear to be like…ghostly versions of herself.

Like, at any given time there’s a half dozen to a dozen different versions of herself, totally intangible and somewhat faded/transparent like a photo that hasn’t been fully developed….and they’re all ‘orbiting’ her, for lack of a better term….kinda like the electrons of an atom orbit it.

And these other versions of herself all look slightly different upon closer inspection - different hairstyles, clothing, a couple have glasses, etc….and some appear like they’re floating in mid-air, others like their feet are sinking into the ground….and most of them usually look like they’re just hovering or flickering around Alicia like half-formed images or ghosts that are all moving, doing something - whether appearing like they’re talking, walking, fighting, reading, any number of things….and all of them seemingly paying no attention to what’s going on around Alicia here and now, if they’re even aware of it.

Which they are though, because the thing is, these ‘satellite versions of herself’ are all alternate versions of herself existing currently in other parallel universes where the Change still occurred and they all ended up with the same magic as this Alicia.

So essentially, there are between ten and sixteen versions of Alicia, spread across an equivalent number of parallel universes….who are all Changelings with the exact same magic….which connects them all.

Just like they appear like ghostly images of this Alicia here, this Alicia appears as one of the ghostly images hovering around each of the other versions of herself in their realities.

And despite them always looking like they’re doing their own thing for the most part and oblivious to anything happening in a different reality, that’s just a matter of them learning after a loooot of practice and trial and error, how to primarily just focus on their main reality and only keep a vague/back of their mind awareness trained on what’s happening with the other versions of herself via their magical connection.

Whenever something big happens to one of them though, no matter which reality, like if one of them is in danger, the others can immediately stop what they’re doing in their home realities and pay attention to the one who’s actively in danger….because all the Alicias can communicate with each other, share knowledge and life experiences and skills with each other, and so whenever one of them really needs the others, the others can all focus on them and come to their aid or support them in a variety of ways, even without being physically present.

And some of these parallel universes are more similar than others, and some of them are just sliiiiightly out of sync with the others….like one of the Alicias lives in a universe that for the most part is almost identical to this Alicia’s universe….except its timeline is like, thirty seconds ahead of this one’s.

Meaning while its not foolproof, due to the very very minor differences in realities resulting in the people in each reality making slightly different choices….that 30 seconds ahead Alicia tends to for the most part be able to give this Alicia a 30 seconds heads up to any unexpected danger.

And there’s a bunch of other ways their magic is helpful too….each of the Alicias’ has their own fields of study…remember since Changeling magic reflects the person, the fact that these Alicias all have the same magic is because all of these versions of her are precocious little science and math prodigies in some way….but they all have slightly different interests and scientific and mathematic pursuits they’ve applied themselves towards or decided to study in earnest. Which means any one of them can at any time draw on the knowledge possessed by one of the others due to studying a specific field that the other one doesn’t know a ton about. Or they can just talk to each other directly, ask each other questions about something, or use themselves as a sounding board or to bounce ideas off of each other.

So sometimes Alicia will just stop in the middle of talking to other Changelings in town here to be like hang on a sec, I need to get this….and appear to just be talking to one of her own flickering reflections in the middle of the sidewalk, while anyone who knows her well is pretty used to this and just chills like someone waiting for a friend to finish up on the phone after she had to take an urgent call, lol.

And since the Alicias don’t have to be in the same or similar physical space to still appear as satellites of each other Alicia in her home reality, one Alicia can be physically present at one side of town and really need something like….from a book she left at home on the other side of town. And one of the other Alicias is usually bound to be at home and by focusing on her, Alicia can just ask her to read from her own book what this Alicia needs to know, or like, check something online, or solve a problem real quick for her and give her the answer while she focuses on doing something else urgent at the same time, etc.

Then there’s the fact that some of the Alicias have a lot of self-defense training and teach the others some tricks, and a couple are very practiced with a variety of weapons they can pass along expertise about….one Alicia excels at picking locks, which comes in handy as this Alicia, along with about five of the others, is kinda like….the Nancy Drew of their respective Bordertowns, the pint-sized, precocious PI that other Changelings often turn to despite her age, because Alicia (all the Alicias, really) is damn good at what she does.

Also via their connection to each other’s realities, when they focus they can basically see what’s going on around one of the others, so for instance, when this one is in danger or running from someone or something like that, and a few of the others are safe and sound at home, they can just focus solely on her and everything going on around her, and its like Alicia has preternatural awareness of her surroundings then, because she’s got five or six other versions of herself flickering around her head and at her back like ghostly shadows…and all of them are shouting instructions to her or to look out for this or that or turn here, etc. So there’s basically six pairs of eyes looking out for her and keeping her apprised of everything that’s going on in her vicinity at the moment.

That really comes in handy.

Everyone can see the other versions of herself that are most present via her connection at any given moment, given that that’s the nature of her physical Change, but since its her magic specifically, only she can actually hear the other versions of her or interact with them….with very rare exceptions. None of them have quite figured out yet how the connection totally works, in the sense that some of them are in sharper focus at times than others, like, there’s always some connection between all of them, but at different times some feel further away and are harder to communicate or interact with than others. And they’re not sure if that’s because like, their different universes are engaged in some kind of movement or orbit or rotation relative to each other, or if there’s some other reason for it, but a few of them are always working on that particular puzzle at any given moment, lol.

But on a related note, on three separate occasions, when one of the Alicias in one reality was in extreme danger, another Alicia was able to temporarily ‘jump into the driver’s seat’ of that Alicia’s body, via their connection….one time was when one of the skilled fighters jumped into one of the Alicias who was being attacked by someone she’d followed during one of her investigations and turned out to be more dangerous than she’d expected….another time one of the other Alicias jumped into the body of an Alicia who’d been knocked unconscious in an accident and the other Alicia was able to assume control of her body and get her out of danger until she woke up and it bumped the other one back into her own body….and then the third time, one of the Alicias saw that this Alicia was about to get hit by a car that she didn’t see coming, and the alternate Alicia tried to warn her by projecting through their connection as hard as she could, to look out….and somehow accidentally jumped fully into this Alicia’s body and threw her(self) out of the way, before almost immediately being slingshotted back into her own body.

Except none of them have figured out how to do anything like that on command, despite it vexing a number of them. They just know it most likely has something to do with the intensity of a life or death threat or situation making it possible…even though it doesn’t always seem to happen, so they try not to rely on it.

And on one particularly memorable occasion that none of them have the faintest clue why or how it happened, eight of them went from flickering around this Alicia like satellite ghosts….to manifesting physically around her in this reality in their own bodies, and shocking the hell out of the guy trying to intimidate her, who was not at all prepared for the teen girl to suddenly be just one of a literal crowd of nine girls all staring him down. So he turned tail and ran, and they all almost instantly winked back into their home realities and returned to just being afterimage-esque glimpses of them still orbiting around her.

None of them have any idea how that happened or why, let alone how to make it happen again, which irritates the crap out of most of them because ugh, screw magic, there has to be a logical explanation for at least the mechanism of this, damn you supernatural forces with no coherent consistency!

(All the Alicias rant quite often about their inability to pin down firm rules for a lot of Changeling magic and how and why it operates the way it does. Big fans of logic, the Alicias. Not so much the bafflement).

Sooooo….she’s a LOT of fun to write, even though she’s very challenging to…maneuver around, narratively speaking, if that makes sense, lol….but like, yeah, I have a blast writing her.

The main Alicia, the one who’s always front and center, is snarky but never in a mean-spirited way. More like….her mind is always twenty steps ahead of everyone around her, sometimes literally, lol, and so she rolls her eyes a lot and sometimes makes a show of being exasperated that she has to slow down and wait for everyone to catch up, but its not because of “oh I think everyone but me is so stupid” or anything like that, its usually just….pure impatience on her part.

The second she figures something out she wants to go, go, go, move on to wherever that leads. She winds up getting in various less than totally safe situations purely because she doesn’t want to stop and grab someone to go along with her when checking something out, but also just because the nature of her magic means she’s never truly completely on her own, and she sometimes forgets to factor that in, or remember that her other selves aren’t usually physically present and able to help her out of a jam.

She’s so used to their presences that every so often she just genuinely forgets that they’re not right there in the room with her, which has caused some confusion to more than one person when meeting her for the first time and realizing those silent movie-style images of her are actually real and she’s actually communicating with them, not just talking to thin air.

Fortunately, she’s smart and capable in her own right, so when you multiply that by a factor of twelve to fifteen similar minds all attuned to all of their best interests….there’s very few situations she isn’t capable of getting out of on her own. Not that this makes her big brother facepalm any less when she blithely handwaves off a recent escapade as no big deal and something she has no idea why he’s getting so worked up about.

(I mean, she does totally get his concerns and isn’t lacking in self-awareness, its just that she’s also committed to giving him gray hairs before he’s forty. She is, among other things, still a little sister after all.)

Due to her many alternate selves, and the vast array of personality differences between each of them, that many of her close friends are at least aware of by proxy, given that even though they can’t hear her other selves, they’ve all heard her casually talk about them often enough to know them in a sense as well….

Anyway, so a lot of Changelings have nicknames based on their Changes or magic, and she’s no exception. She goes by her own name and just introduces herself as Alicia, but its not uncommon to hear others address her as or reference her as ‘Sybil.’

When asked how she feels about that name, she tends to just shrug and stare off into the distance contemplatively. “I don’t know,” she’ll say at last. “Part of me loves it, and part of me hates it.”

And then she’ll just grin as everyone around her just groans, because she’s just Like This, and just looooves being literal in little ways like that - given that she’s literally acknowledging that half of her alternates feel the one way, and the other half feel the other way.

Another common line of hers is something like “Hey, I’m only problematic on Thursdays,” or “that wasn’t me, that was Alicia Number Nine, its not my fault she hates you.”

Her magic is just weird enough and behaves just erratically and unexpectedly enough, that its hard to be entirely sure when she’s just bullshitting you and when she might actually be telling the truth and some weird power snafu had one of the other Alicias in her body the last time you interacted with her and she was short with you.

There’s never a dull moment with her.

#changelings 'verse

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coloursandquills · 4 years

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Wattpad Beta Program And What It Actually Means

Everyone on Wattpad, at one point or the other, has Googled up what this sinister sounding Wattpad Next beta-program is. If you are anyone like me, then I am sure, even you came up with the same bunch of similar sounding articles, all of them paraphrasing the same speech that Wattpad cofounder and CEO, Allen Lau gave or the FAQ right here on Wattpad that we were unsatisfied with in the first place.

I do not pretend to fully understand what the in-depth intent and working of the program is, but fortunately for you, nor am I here to parrot the same things that are available all over the internet currently. I might not have a factually sound opinion, but I am here to start an open-minded conversation about this elephant in the room. Wattpad might have been engineered as a place where you will find 'stories you'll love'. But that was way back in the early 2000s (doesn't the mere sight of those three zeros bring perspective into the picture?) when the Millennials were just awakening. By the time 2013 rolled in, Wattpad was so mainstream that I managed to hear of it in my small town (and become a part of it) — which is an achievement because the app had reached a place where there were no bookstores yet. Come 2019 and now our beloved literary app is now not just a place where we find stories that we love, now, it is a place 'where stories live'. It is a place that has been a spring board for many passionate writers to get their voices heard, be themselves, feel supported and ultimately, get published. And, as of 2019, get signed for a movie too. With the scenario changed so drastically, is it really a surprise that even the platform has new ideas, experiments and ambitions of its own?

Enter Wattpad Next.

As we all already know by now, it is a beta-testing program, said to have been released for a short-term trial period to observe and analyse statistics and performances of a few select stories from a few select regions after they have been monetised. The currency is called Coins, available to be purchased in multiple batches which can be used to unlock a chapter or an entire story. The participation in this program was invitation-only.

Here is where the speculation begins.

This program, as far as I have seen, has been vastly met with mistrust and/or outright hate. One could argue that it seems unfair. What until yesterday was free, now suddenly had to be purchased. With real money.

On a site that is majorly populated with minors.

Sure most stories are going to be free, and we can read them instead. But is that really the solution?

This beta program has its own set of pros and cons — just like everything in life. The question is, do the pros really outweigh the cons? For all that's good on Wattpad, let's hope that they do.

1. Quality Of Writing

This is the first thing that comes to my mind as soon as I think of stories getting paid. For something to be bought, it has to be worth buying. If the beta-program kicks-off and comes here to stay, this might be one of the changes it could bring with itself. The stories will all strive to reach the finesse that a story-worth-buying requires. Writers would be motivated and obligated to post near-to-finished products to maintain their readership. All paid stories will be under moral pressure to be the best they could be. (Unless they chose to remain unpaid, that's an option too.)

But, do writers really need this pressure? Writing on Wattpad had always been about expressing boldly, without feeling self-conscious. Isn't writing, plotting, pacing and character developing already time consuming enough? Now we have to make sure that our first drafts are practically as flawless as final drafts too? Of course, assuming that every good quality story will be provided the opportunity to sign up for being a paid story when the beta-program stops being beta.

Pro: Good quality writing. Con: Possible undue pressure on the writers.

2. Economical Crusade Upon The Readers

The fact that you have to pay just doesn't sit well with us, does it? Like I have mentioned before, Wattpad is vastly populated with minors. Also, since the whole program has been justified as a response to allow readers to show appreciation for their favorite writers, why did nobody think of a voluntary-donation system? Something like Patreon.

Not that the Coins cost too much, comparatively (hoping that the Canadian rates don't apply in the developing/under-developed countries.) Because, at the end of the day, these are books too books that we are genuinely interested in. And do minors and people without credit cards not buy printed books? How did the whole Harry Potter series sell then?

Pro: Kinda, sorta affordable. Con: Maybe not.

3. A Hand To The Writers

The one point you cannot deny — the one without a con.

How many stories and Wattpad profiles have you witnessed going on hiatus or being deactivated/deleted because the writer had either finished school/college and now didn't have time to dedicate to writing regularly? Or they were looking for jobs/getting into a new, hectic job that inconvenienced them? If you are a Wattpad with less time on your hands, the first thing to go is always your story — because it is the most demanding and the least paying.

Writing a story might have started looking easy because Wattpad allows new, possible, passionate writers to see that every person has a story and every story has a reader. Wattpad has done so much to make this space such a safe zone for us and only a fool will try to ruin it after coming so far. A fool, that Wattpad is not — because it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that Wattpad is what it is because of its users and the environment that we create for ourselves when we come together.

Wattpad beta-program is like a pebble in a still pond. It is something foreign, and scary and incomprehensible. Until the pebble doesn't reach the bed, it will feel like it doesn't belong — like it was better before, without this unsolicited change when things had been the way they were. But once the pebble rests on the floor of the pond, among all the other pebbles, it will fit, and seem like it was meant to be. It won't seem so out of the ordinary anymore and all will be still again. It is a change. It is scary and difficult to understand or accept. But all it needs is time. And all will be fine.

#wattpad beta next #paid stories #wattpad

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arecomicsevengood · 4 years

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Is This How I See Jaime?

Objectively speaking, I am not that old. Still there’s no getting past the fact that I am getting older every day, like everybody else. I might not be at the point where my body betrays my age, where I ache all the time and grunt when I stand, but my mind still carries with it the weight of decades of lived experience, and this can at any moment make me want to lie down.

There are few artists that capture the feeling of aging quite like Jaime Hernandez. Partly this is because of his working method. No one else does what he does, making serialized comics for close to forty years, that tell stories with the same characters. These are not truly STORIES, utilizing flashbacks that provide crucial context to events and create literary effects, even as the overall narrative they tell moves forward in time and builds an attachment between reader and character comparable to long-running television series. Still, when broken up into serialized installments in issues of Love And Rockets, it can frequently feel like nothing is happening. Often, what you get in an individual issue is around fifteen pages, split between multiple pieces focused on different characters. These fragments are focused, compressed in a manner closer to cinema than television, but you’re still only getting what might amount to three to five minutes depicted on-screen. With a few exceptions, what you get in an issue is not a complete short story with a beginning, middle, and end. For all the influence the Hernandez Brothers have had on alternative comics, reading the people they’ve influenced will not prepare you for how much Love And Rockets is modeled off of serialized comics, and how much of its power it draws from continuity and extended engagement.

This pacing demands a certain level of expectation-free interaction, which is crucial to deep relationships. It’s worth noting Jaime’s strips run alongside his brother Gilbert’s work, which is similar in some ways, but by no means the same. Gilbert’s body of work is a lot more complicated, due in part to how prolific he is, the meta/self-referential/self-deconstructive elements of the stories he’s telling, and also how he draws tits like Mark Newgarden draws noses, that just keep getting larger. He deserves a deep critical reading, but I don’t have the energy, money, or time to keep up with him. Running the two brothers’ work side by side makes Love And Rockets implicitly about family, which then in turn becomes a subject each cartoonist explicitly makes work about. And not just “chosen” family, but the actual people who’ve known you your entire life. Which is, inherently, a concept which both means more the older you get, and remains somewhat alienating. As a reader, it helps to be prepared to extend to Love And Rockets the goodwill one would a family member, to begin to get on its level.

On a superficial level, making work about family seems somewhat conservative and nostalgic. That’s not to suggest it’s not valuable, or worth fighting for. There’s just a certain adjustment of values or attitudes a reader needs to make to get on board with the work, that might be at odds with the punk rock alternative comics reputation that precedes it. The comics themselves are built on a formal language of cartooning that’s older and out of fashion: Sixties Ditko comics, Lil Archie, Dennis The Menace Goes To Mexico. This adds to a feeling of being about aging in a way younger art cartoonists inspired by their same-age immediate peers can’t get to. For instance, I love Olivier Schrauwen, and I can see the influence Yuichi Yokoyama has on his work, and I view the two of them as peers in dialogue, creating the future of comics, which creates a totally different reading experience than I get reading work that feels more in dialogue with the past. The formal choices of the Hernandez brothers, including that their work appears for the first time in serialized comic book formats, calls conscious attention to history. Consciousness of the past hurts, and this truth is a huge element of the plots and themes of Jaime’s work.

It’s the sheer graphic strength of Jaime’s drawing that enables it to stick in the memory. He’s able to capture a tiny gesture and render it iconic through use of line and spotted blacks. The precision he brings his images gives them a certain ease of recall. This is the crux of a two-page spread at the climax of The Love Bunglers where, as a bunch of different stories and images are recalled, now rendered at different angles, they’re all there in your consciousness, in a mix of your memories of the comic and your memories of your own individual life. It’s a hugely cathartic climax.

However, both Gilbert and Jaime have this aspect to what they do that can easily frustrate a reader, and it is seemingly inextricable from the core of their power: Once a point is reached where you can easily follow along, and a satisfying conclusion to a story occurs, the next several issues will completely destabilize that and you will again not know what exactly is going on. For instance, if you read the Perla La Loca collection, collecting the “Wigwam Bam” and “Chester Square” graphic novels, by the end of it, you will have a very exciting experience that should convince you Jaime Hernandez is one of the greatest cartoonists in the world. Reading the Penny Century collection of the work that followed, plenty of stories will leave you feeling like he lost his touch, or is spinning his wheels. At the end of the book, and the “Everybody Loves Me Baby” story, you’re knocked flat on your ass again, but if you had read the original comic books as they came out, who knows if you would’ve stuck it out that long.

This, by the way, is one of the most realistic things there is. Life’s “things just keep happening” quality will fuck you up time and again. While I haven’t given up on life just yet, I have stopped reading Love And Rockets a few times. I’m not the sort of reader who sticks with a series out of inertia. I have always been hyper-aware of the value of my comic-book buying dollar, and therefore pretty fickle. If I read two issues straight of a comic that feels like it’s treading water, I would be done with it. I’ve gone back and picked up things after the fact and filled in gaps, or I’ve switched to reading trade collections checked out from the library. I bought the first two issues of the recently relaunched Love And Rockets volume 4 in one go, realized that it was continuing stories from Love And Rockets: New Stories, and didn’t go back for more, put off by the stories’ continuation from the previous volume.

It’s only now, with the release of Is This How You See Me and Tonta, that I am reading the stories that followed up The Love Bunglers in a complete form. They blew me away. The effects Jaime’s going for at any given moment may be subtle, but they accumulate, and this accumulation then becomes the true effect, and why I analogize it to aging: There’s this sheer weight that results from how things just continue to happen, and each time they hit you with what feels like more force, even as the moments themselves are minor ones. This is a true-to-life feeling that is very hard to capture. It’s present in the relentless pace of Charlie Kaufman’s masterpiece Synecdoche, New York, but that is a movie too intense to rewatch for many. Jaime’s work is built around you returning to it, which means it has to be somewhat inviting, and include levity.

Is This How You See Me focuses on the characters of Maggie and Hopey, introduced in 1981 as teenagers, now presumably in their mid-fifties, happily married to other people but still weighing the possibility of cheating with their ex. The characters return to a “punk rock reunion” in their hometown, to reminisce on the past with old friends, and old characters we haven’t seen in years appear, visibly older than when they were last drawn, but still recognizably themselves. This plot lends the comic some elements of nostalgic fan-service that I intellectually feel an aversion to. It feels almost like the plot is designed transparently for those purposes. Bringing back old characters would strike me as a crass project in the pages of X-Men or Legion Of Super-Heroes, but the naturalism of Jaime’s approach means that it allows him to show me things I legitimately haven’t seen in a comic book before. It’s probable they’ve been in movies or books, but I would argue they work better in comics.

For instance, there’s a scene where the reunited cast are showing each other photos on their phones. This is a normal thing people do, and so surely it has been depicted in a film. But in a comic, there’s this weird meta element to it. Smartphones have text message conversations appear in little word balloons, right? The word balloon being a technique comics used to depict speech, as part of their normal communication system of images. Then, when interacting in physical space, people show pictures to each other, using this device they usually use for the mimesis of speech over distances, but they’re communicating using pictures to show what their life is like. Which is what the comic itself is doing more generally. So, there’s there’s this semiotic quality to the gesture of the outstretched hand with phone in it which feels really profound when depicted in comics, while it would feel sort of stupid and uncinematic in a movie, where the aging theater audience would have to squint and ask their neighbor what is being shown in the text message they’re seeing on screen.

Similarly, we see the married couple of Maggie and Ray, separated from each other for the length of the weekend, fretting over how much they should be in communication, drafting texts and deleting them. There’s an intimacy people who live with each other share, where much of what they encounter apart from the other person they want to talk to them about, because to be close to another person is to have them in some ways always present inside your head. Depicting the writing of a text, and then the decision to delete it, captures both the intimacy of a couple and the intimacy of one’s own private thoughts, in a way that only a form with the intimacy of a comic is able to depict effectively. Prose alone can’t capture the fluctuations of posture and self-presentation which is the heart of deleting a draft.

Concern for one’s image is depicted as well in the title pages to individual chapters, showing characters taking pictures of themselves in mirrors with their phones. These pages seem to depict not so much the cultivated selfie but the self-awareness of the drafting process, the titles above them taking on a certain poetry, built around the words spoken to oneself unconsciously that are the opposite of the language one chooses to send in a message to convey a precise thought.

This stuff really impressed me, and it all fits within a language of small gestures. While there are tons of books that are about how connection works in the digital age, it also always feels like that stuff is a commentary on how young people live. I’m not sure I’ve seen anything as interested in how people in middle age use these devices. Of course, it’s possible examples exist in work targeted to older audiences, and I just missed it because it wasn’t marketed to me.

It was actually Jaime’s other 2019 book, Tonta, that spoke to me more. Here, the aging the book is about is a coming-of-age thing about a high school student, and the book has this spirited youthful quality to it from the outset. While other, darker, plot elements unfold as it goes on, what was interesting to me is that the noir-like narrative that exists as a counterpoint in the finished book might not have even seemed part of the same story to a reader of Love And Rockets, where the character nicknamed Tonta just sort of suddenly emerged. There’s even a few pages in this collection given over to narration by Ray, who otherwise doesn’t appear in the book. These elements don’t seem dissonant or like they don’t belong. It just makes the book itself feel loose, like it feels as free and exploratory as a teenager looking for something to do. Placed together inside a book, the disparate threads become united by having a main character to pay attention to how developments of the plot affect her. The book has a real tonal arc as it unfolds, and the way the book gets you in its grip from such a goofy start seems to replicate how the stories about the Maggie character developed over time, here captured in miniature.

The sum of these two books will at some point only be a portion of a future volume of the Love And Rockets library, the formatting of the Perla La Loca and Penny Century books I mentioned earlier. There are portions from recent issues of Love And Rockets that are natural continuations and codas from these books, and what tapestries these fragments will be woven into is unknown to me. Another gutpunch could be just around the corner or years in the offing. There’s really no way to know what the future holds.

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blankdblank · 5 years

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Spilled Tea

…

All –

@himoverflowers, @theincaprincess, @aspiringtranslator, @sweeticedtea, @ggbbhehe4455, @thegreyberet, @patanghill17, @jesgisborne, @curvestrology, @alishlieb, @jogregor, @armitageadoration, @fizzyxcustard, @here2have-fun, @lilith15000, @marvels-ghost, @catthefearless, @imjusthereforthereads, @c-s-stars

X all Rich. A - @abiwim, @deepestfirefun, @thestorybookmistress

Perfection. Waking in a plushy hotel bed you giggled seeing the new heels you were going to wear sitting on top of the comfy skinny black jeans and your new teasing t shirt you found in the mall a few weeks back on location in a post filming bout of window shopping with none other than Lee Pace. Lost in your own daydreams you enjoyed your time with the actor you had a miserably obvious crush on helping for your on screen romance with him.

The man a secret self made billionaire hoping to find someone to love him for him realizes the woman of his choosing who put up a struggle at being wooed in lavish ways after her own hidden stash of cash from her hidden lineage. All compounding the reveal of the disappointment she was made to feel by said detached family for doing something deemed so mediocre as composing for the film industry eventually earning her enough money to dwarf their remaining funds after squandering it all.

But still even as friends Lee was wonderful and helped to give you confidence at your first simple romance film after so many complicated and in depth roles. This was your first character not buried in makeup and on screen for nearly half the film with no one but the hazel eyed wonder with so much experience in the subject. Your last week he had even seen how much you loved the wardrobe and ring of your dreams he had proposed with and after he had bought the car he drove in the film for himself he bought you that ring and the most expensive pair of shoes you squeaked at when you had first seen them in the wardrobe trailer.

Off again between films since your show had been through its final season you were back to audio books and the name of your costars for it lifted your mood even more at how highly your former one had built them up for you. Shy at first, keeping to themselves but a pleasure to work with and hilarious when in the right mood.

It was such a great day, fully dressed and out of your hotel you trotted your way down the block easing your thumb around the band of your new double banded ring on your right ring finger, cider was all that was left for a blissful week for you to carry in your mind forever. Tall and sullen a familiar figure slumped his way through the door after you had your drink in hand, anxiously you bit your lip hoping not to ruin the cover for the man you assumed it to be under that down turned hat of his.

Outside you waited and in your move to say hello your efforts were spoiled. Warm tea was now coating you and without a word in edgewise a sweater was pulled over your head and your eyes moved to the bag said stranger left on the paper stand to your left. In your shock you forgot to say hello and had nothing to do but ease your arms through the massive sleeves adjusting hold of your cup to do so before grabbing the abandoned bag hoping your assumption on the stranger’s identity was true. All the way to work wondering just what you would say to the man when you saw him.

… Richard’s morning …

Absolute hell, for the giant of a man his day had been absolute hell. He had been crammed into tiny cars, the back seat of a tiny jet for an inhumanely long flight for a trip he could have easily takes the bus or train for and had heaps more space. His only moment of peace being this single quiet cup of tea he would carry in to record his latest audio book.

This spine tingling thriller played out from both the ghost and new owner of a bed and breakfasts’ point of view, the twist, the owner is defended from the detective who covered up the ghost’s murder.

The battle of wills and opposing sides crescendos up until the new owner is thrown by no other than his own ancestor from the top balcony in an attempt to render him in a coma to take over his body and live again. The plan works, for a little while until the ghost and owner have to work together to return the owner to his body. Victory is found but in the end there are no winners because trapped on the other side of a mirror are two newfound lovers all but forever parted.

The story was just what he needed, since leaving yet another film to be edited his interest pulled and he reentered his hated slump between projects leaving him agitated and moody to all around him. It magically appeared by chance and he had to jump on it. His costar sounded familiar though he couldn’t quite place the name, of only he hadn’t deleted the email by accident in a drunken phone purge to ‘freshen his mind’ he could have looked her up to see how he knew the woman or at least recognize her walking into the audio studio.

Tea acquired, next step on to the studio. Blankly his eyes scanned the crowd around him back out to the street until a bright yellow shirt caught his eye, the figure it flung to perfectly held his gaze for a moment until he actually read what the eye grabbing shirt had said, ‘Real Unicorns Have Curves’ In bold black letters above the silhouette of a rhino.

Could have turned to leave, could have chuckled to himself, but after a mouthful of tea in his attempt at a subtle sip his chuckle ended up with him spewing his mouthful across said woman now frozen in place holding her own to go cup in her hand. A slow tilt of her head brought her eyes to his shock filled eyes and open mouthed stare in his moving closer.

And out in buckets it poured, “I am so sorry! I did not mean-, I would never-!” His eyes scanning around for any source of a napkin or something on the miraculously empty sidewalk corner.

‘Only one thing to do’ his mind must have mumbled because his bag and cup were set on a paper stand and over his head he tugged his outer sweater after shrugging out of his jacket. In a single move his sweater was eased over her head to fall loosely around her figure and lump up on her raised arm still holding her cup and his jacket was pulled on again. “I am so so sorry! And there’s a chill today too! I was just reading your shirt, and it just happened. Please forgive me. And keep the sweater.”

As soon as he had trampled into her life he turned and left for his car to finish the trip to the studio. Continuously berating himself for his accident and the following disaster after. Perhaps, he hoped, the rest of this day wouldn’t be so terrible. Still, his same mistaken turn was taken as the times before he’d driven himself out here in his trips to the studio in Texas. Again and again he left ridiculously early knowing he would always forget to get into the other lane to turn left not right. Instead a new longer route was ingrained in his mind complete with attractive eateries and shops along the way he usually wandered through on his way back again.

Finally his reserved spot was taken and a glance over revealed the name of the woman he was working with, Bunny Pear. A common name for audio books and from a Sci-fi show for now on a decade since she was a teen, the heavy prosthetics and makeup disguising her true face from the public so when she actually got roles without them she could melt into the characters, her latest being with Lee Pace.

The simple romcom made her chosen face for this role a common sight in homes all over the world. Her time with the actor supposedly so endearing Lee actually helped to pitch in to purchase the ridiculously large ring and wardrobe her character had for the film she absolutely loved. An act Lee stated she had sworn to make it up to him in return somehow. But her friendship was more than enough payment to help him through his own emotional and work slump.

Curiously he made his way inside with a chuckle remembering Lee’s latest call of a edible arrangement and bouquet of bee plushies she had sent to him on his new depressing thriller set helping him to get through his hard day of filming.

One last ding and the elevator doors opened, another left and down the hall and he eased the proper door open and passed through only to pause feeling himself freeze seeing a familiar sweater he had been wearing not twenty minutes ago, “fuck, it’s her!” His mind shouted and animal instinct kicked in for a creature closer to a lizard or tiny kitten, “Run, hide,”

“Richard! There you are!” A smile flinched onto his face as he walked closer seeing you grin and extend your hand, “This is Bunny.” Graham’s head turned as your hands clasped into a firm shake exposing his clammy palm right away, “Oh, my phone,” he mumbled and darted off to chase his rock anthem screaming cellphone from the table across the wall.

“Huge fan.” You giggled out then released his hand to pass him his bag he had forgotten making his cheeks pink up deepening your already stunning smile to a knee weakening level.

Graham was back again, “See, told you he’d be here.” His hands patted Richard on the back, “Just walked right past it after setting it down, honestly Rich you need to get some sleep or you’d lose your head if you could set it down.”

The man between you chuckled as you giggled and fixed the neck of your new sweater from the weight of his bag he carried across the room to the table, “Ya, you’re right.”

Graham chuckled eyeing your sweater, “We were just talking and I mentioned you had a sweater just like hers. Could have sworn you would have worn it.”

Richard shook his head and you giggled out, “Ah, just my luck. Would have been adorable for a picture with matching sweaters to send to Lee. And he was so worried we would have a rocky start.”

Somehow a chuckle escaped Richard in relief as you moved the conversation into work without mentioning his fumble earlier. Subtly wiping his sweat off your hand onto the sleeve bunched in your palm as he rubbed his hands in his thighs sitting at the table beside you until the manager arrived to join you.

…

In sections you recorded the book, more of an interactive one between you three, you and Richard taking turns narrating with splits between for vocalizing your sections of dialog in the other’s with Graham loving his role as the killer. Between each break you loved seeing Richard adjusting his jacket making you smirk and ask pinch his sweater silently asking if he wanted it back. Each time he subtly shook his head through a blush stirring up to his ears making him thankful for the slightly dimmed booths.

Steadily you had recorded the first half of the book ending with your character shouting, “You’re a Monster!” to the killer as he raced off with the owner’s body. As written in the book you were left with your ghost crouching beside the owner’s sobbing ghost self as the pain of all that had happened flowed through him at once, your gentle touch stilling his tears as you said, “Everything will be okay.” Your eyes turning red as his flickered red with a plotting smirk as you both began to plot your recovering of his body and vengeance upon the killer.

With a giggle you accepted Graham’s hug saying you would see him the next day for the next portion while he took out his phone to call back home as promised. Sluggishly Richard held back as you adjusted the ties on your heels. Up again you couldn’t help but smirk seeing him still lingering around to walk you out. Crossing the room you matched his stride when he turned to leave finally and silently you walked until you got into the elevator where you asked, “So, tea again in the morning?” You glanced up and giggled, “Please don’t apologize again,” seeing his open mouth close again.

“Tea does help.”

“I always like to sip on cider, even if it gets cold.” He nodded and wet his lips, “I’ll have your sweater back to you tomorrow.”

“I meant it, you can keep it. Least I could do.”

“It’s not the worst you know,” his brow rose curiously as your grin grew, “I thought you might get a kick out of my shirt and you did, and besides it answered my question if your sweaters were always as comfy as they seemed.”

A low chuckle left him and he asked, “Where are you staying?” You named your hotel and he grinned purring, “Same. I hear they have a great place downstairs to eat if you wanted to try and have another go at that first meeting? I swear you won’t be wearing any of it after.”

“That sounds lovely, I am starving.” Making him chuckle and guide you out to the parked cars where he set his bag in the passenger seat of his car, closing the door for it he leaned on as you sighed at the truck blocking you both in with flashing lights unloading a set of boxes to the lobby, “You know tomorrow since we are staying at the same place we could carpool, save the planet and pandas and all that.”

Giggling softly you crossed your arms, “How dare you use my love of pandas against me.” Making him laugh and nip at his lip in a glance up at his feet ending with his brows raised in a hopeful upward glance at you, “Such a charmer, just shut up and kiss me already.”

With a laugh he replied, “Don’t tempt me. I just might.”

After a nip a your own lip you asked, “So, how upscale a place is it, to know what shirt to pick or if we’re crossing into dress territory.”

“It seems casual, the sweater should suffice if you don’t want to change.”

You giggled again saying, “Oh I’m changing my shirt at least, if this one made you spit up your tea I have another I’d like to see your reaction to it.”

Smirking at you he asked playfully, “Any hints?”

You shook your head, “Nope.” You glanced at the truck as it moved and inhaling deeply he stood asking lowly, “Just how serious was that offer earlier for a kiss?”

“Eager to cash that in already?”

A weak chuckle escaped him, “Just curious, we’re only recording another two days. Then I’m back to England again.”

“Well it just so happens I’ve got to be back out there for a new film. I get to shove Hugh Dancy in a trunk.”

“I could give him a call, set up a lunch or something.”

Another giggle left you and you teased, “I’d hate to see what he thinks of my outfit.” Richard rolled his eyes chuckling as he hummed, “I’ll follow you back.”

Parked in the covered garage for the hotel you both walked up and waited out in the hall at his own insistence, typing on his phone smirking as he planned the evening he wished to share with you back in England. But in his distraction the door was mistaken for the wall and at your going to open the door again the man with his shoulder against the door collapsed taking you with him down to the ground. Awkward giggling from you and laughter from him filled the room as his feet shifted awkwardly allowing the door to shut.

Teasingly underneath him you said, “As random as your greetings are I can’t wait to see what your good morning will be like tomorrow.” Chuckling again Richard, still blushing madly inched up onto his knees where he finally could read what your shirt said as you held your place propped up on your elbows. A sudden snorting laugh was muffled with his hands and shaking with laughter his head settled onto your middle easing your chance to smooth your fingers through his hair fixing it back after his fall.

Calm again he inched up again grinning widely at you as you sat up and kissed him on the cheek, “Come on, let’s get something to eat. You can always tackle me again after if you like.” Another chuckle escaped him and he climbed to his feet helping you up to yours and kept hold of your hand to walk you to the door and out to the elevator for what he hoped to be an accident free meal.

#Richard Armitage x Reader OC

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smolbeandrabbles · 5 years

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Sway Pt.5 - Danny Rayburn x Reader (Bloodline)

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Here / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9 / Part 10

Author’s Note: This is it! The infamous chapter I wrote twice!! To make up for it, I’ve added in a bunch of stuff that wasn’t there before like more Jase/Javi/Danny banter. I actually LOVE their dynamic... Yeaaah I wrote a scene based on another scene because I couldn’t HELP it. The gifs will prove that! Valentine’s Day doesn’t even necessarily have to be the setting for any of the following to happen... Only, it was near Valentine’s Day at the time and it all made a lot of sense in my head. So, celebrate Valentine’s Day a month late, why don’t you? (haha...) + Bonus. I made a Gerry reference. 😉

Disclaimer: As started before, I own nada by my OCs. I took some lyrical liberties with ‘Slow Dance in a Parking Lot’ by Jordan Davis. Sue me! Please don’t actually sue me. I finished Bloodline and it actually hurts, so, I’m going to be “stealing” a bunch of ideas/lines... Here is the very first scene stealing moment, though.

Premise: The Premise is Valentine’s Day, need I say more? I tried not to be horribly Cliche...

Word Count: 7748

Warnings: Drinking, Sexual Pre-Amble (a-la-pt-4). The knowledge this will never be as good as the version I actually deleted? I had a breakdown in the middle of my living room over that, it deserves a warning

…And I don't care what song comes next I'm falling right here, don't want a safety net. In a slow dance with you Spinning you around by the restaurant sign Moving our feet over the painted white lines Getting close to you Making the most of whatever we got Even if it's just a slow dance in a parking lot

----

I want to wear his initial On a chain round my neck, chain round my neck Not because he owns me, But 'cause he really knows me Which is more than they can say

Danny couldn’t believe that another month had flown by. As he flicked the calendars in the restaurant to February. You’d been dating since the previous summer. And things were getting serious. He couldn’t remember the last time that he had been in a relationship this long. But, he was glad for it. Jason whistled as he turned over the calendar in the kitchen; “Busiest day of the year ahead Danny! You gonna leave us in the lurch!?” Danny turned to him, confused “What?” “Valentine’s Day! C’mon man, what are you doing with Y/N!!” He turned back to the calendar, eyes wide, oh. God! “…I wasn’t going to go anywhere… I was gonna come… here… Oh my God!” “Danny!!!” Jason couldn’t believe it “Did you forget about Valentine’s Day!?” “When was the last time I ever did anything on Valentines!?” He turned to Jason “It’s always been just another day…! Crap! She’s gonna kill me!” “Probably!” Jason laughed Javier poked his head through the kitchen window at the commotion; “What is up!?” “Danny forgot Valentine’s Day.” “WHAT!?” Javier laughed “NO! Danny! THE most important day for any girl in a relationship!?” “Stop it! Both of you! What am I gonna do! I can’t leave you all – you’re right, it’s traditionally one of the busiest days of the year…! God, can I really bring her here again??”

Whilst he mulled this over in his head, half in panic, Javier disappeared from the window, and then waltzed through the kitchen doors. The grin on his face obvious with what he was going to do; “…How are you gonna approach that one?” “He’s got 14 days…” Jason folded his arms, just as intent on hearing Danny’s plan – that he had about 5 seconds to come up with… Danny put his head in his hands “I’m just gonna have to owe her big time…” He thought on it “No, maybe… Maybe I can make this right… I’ll go a little off menu… Something she’ll really like. Then in a few weeks when it isn’t so busy I’ll take her out…” “It’s almost booked up!” Javier turned to the book to check it out, and became concerned with how busy he would be that night; “I’ll find somewhere for her! It’s my place!” “…Well, You got two weeks!” Jason pointed back to the calendar he had just changed. “Don’t forget the gift! Girls love gifts!” Danny made a noise like they weren’t making it any easier, which they weren’t. Javier almost tutted “Can you imagine? Poor, poor Y/N... She'll be expecting a long-" "Loooong!" Jason chimed in, with an eyebrow wiggle "Romantic night...!" "So romantic!" Jason put his hand over his heart as Javi put an arm around him and continued; "Michelin star restaurant, Miami skyline view, Danny's money paying... The works Valentines... As only she deserves. But picture this instead..." He held his hands out emphasising the two words of the restaurant name; "Viva Caputa. Again! And two measly hours of her boyfriend’s time." Danny looked like he was on the verge of anger at their teasing, and Javier narrowly missed the towel that was thrown his way. "You two are SO not getting paid this month!" "What!! DANNY!!" "OH! NO!!" But he cracked a smile and laughed anyway "You fuckin' deserve it! Overtime. Neither of you are getting on dates either!" "Oh! Just another romantic evening with Danny Rayburn - lucky us!!" Javier laughed at Jason's statement as he left the kitchen: "We’ll be Danny's dates! We’ll actually see more of him than she will..!" "Javi, don't you have tables to wait!?" "I'm going!" He called back as the doors swung closed behind him. "Good cuz I don't pay you to stand and chat!" "You just said you weren't paying us." Danny gave Jason a warning look "You can get back to work and all!" Jason beamed; "I love you too Danny!"

* You rolled your car to a stop outside his restaurant later that day; “Hey!” “Hi.” He hopped in, unsure how to broach the subject “…So…Uh… I was thinking…” “Yeah? Go on…” “…Valentine’s Day’s coming up.” You looked across to him, you knew that… Of course you knew that. You just hadn’t expected Danny of all people to be talking to you about it. He didn’t seem like the type to be taking you on a Valentine’s date. And you had to be honest, that was fine with you… You weren’t sure you’d mind not doing anything. “Yes?” “…Well… It’s… one of the busiest days in the business… And I can’t leave those guys all alone in there…” “And that’s fine…” “SO I was wondering…” he bit his lip “…If you wanted to… or you wouldn’t mind, coming down to my restaurant.” Before you had chance to reply he continued quickly “I’ll do something off menu, it’ll be exclusive. I know you… So… I think I can get that right… I just, I’m sorry. I’ll have to make it up to you…” You smiled, Danny Rayburn was so full of surprises; “Ok. Fine, I’ll come down to your restaurant “…On one condition.” He looked across to you, suddenly nervous about what you might say, and swallowed hard “…Anything.” “…Don’t buy me anything. Please? We’re not doing gifts it’s too… cliché… We’re not… No. Please, don’t buy me anything… I don’t need anything either…” “What!? So you’re not going to get me anything!?” He faked hurt, his mouth open “No! Shut up! That’s not what I said, I said – you can’t buy me anything! I just won’t get you something either then it’s fair!” He took out his mobile to call back to the restaurant. "Are you sure!? This is your last chance before they pick up! All I can promise is a good table and me for a couple of hours, not even the whole evening - You can back out!" If you weren't with him you didn't want to be out on Valentine’s Day at all. You couldn't believe when it would be so busy he'd even take a few hours out for you... "Danny I don’t care!" You forgot the rest of your sentence, and paid for it. He gasped in pretend shock "You don't care!?...AND I’m not good enough for a gift!?” He laughed, turning his attention back to his mobile as you heard Javier pick up; “Unbelievable!” * You studied yourself in the mirror. Was red too much of a Valentine’s Day colour? Were you about to become the cliché you’d sworn you weren’t!? You had to be honest with yourself you weren’t even sure you’d be wearing red, if it wasn’t for the fact that you had gone out and brought this dress specifically for tonight. It was the same cut as the one you had worn the first time you had frequented his restaurant. And the split up the side showed off your Miami tan. You had gone all out tonight to look flawless. Not for yourself. But for him. Your hair and makeup was perfect, your heels just the right height, and you felt good. The final touch, as ever, was your favourite perfume… You wondered if Danny would remember it from before… Gathering your things together you walked confidently down to your car, loving the sound of your heels striking the floor. You turned up your music loud as you made your way to his restaurant. You weren’t sure about the alcohol involved in tonight for you to be driving… You’d either have to take it slow, or take a cab. It didn’t matter; you could simply collect your car tomorrow… No-one would mind you leaving it overnight. When you arrived in the parking lot you weren’t surprised to see it packed. Luckily for you, dating the man who owned the place had its privileges. Tonight it really paid off; as only the staff parking spaces were free. You knew Danny had a car but, he didn’t have it with him tonight… You rolled your own neatly into his parking space and took a deep breath. Time for your big entrance. When you rounded the corner to the front of the restaurant they were queuing out of the door. Surely this wasn’t people who had reservations!? It was crazy; even for Valentine’s day you’d never seen Danny’s this busy. You smiled to yourself, quite proud – he was going to do well tonight. You walked past the line, which continued inside, where Javier caught you;

“Amorcita! Come, come! Right this way!” “I don’t think I’ve ever seen it this busy!” “Trust me… neither have we…” He took your hand and led you; “You look stunning… By the way. Danny doesn’t know what he’s missing by not taking you out!” “When it’s this busy, you best be glad he’s here…!” You followed Javier to a table in the back of the room, where it was quieter. Danny had clearly carefully chosen this spot… “You better like this table! You will not believe the number of times I have had to set it and re-set it!” You could imagine, it was for you - Even perfection would not be good enough for Danny tonight. You smiled gently as Javier sat you so you faced the kitchen; “Now you can at least look at your man whilst he’s working… Though how dare he, when you look this good?” You laughed “Well, Javi, let’s face the facts… We’re both going to be in agony waiting…” He smiled; “I’ll let him know you are here. Trust me, I’ve never seen a man more excited about creating off the menu pieces… He’s been looking forward to this for two weeks… Can I get you your usual drink?” “Oh. No. Javi… That’s okay… I don’t want to get too… drunk?... Tonight… I’m driving.” “Oh… Well, you know, I’m sure Danny’s got something in mind that goes with EVERYTHING he’s made…” He checked his watch; “You think he’d come say Hi…” “He’s busy Javi… But please do let him know I’m here…” He nodded, and left to remind Danny EXACTLY what time it was.

* Javier made sure all of his tables were happy before he made his way back over to you. “SO, whilst Danny is busy. I’m going to be your date!” You laughed; “Why?” “Sorry… Why…?! Because you are the most beautiful girl in the room. And everyone knows it.” You had to admit, whilst you had been sitting here alone, with your thoughts, nearly everyone in the room had been staring at you, glancing over and whispering about the mystery girl who had shown up here dressed to perfection without a date. Who was the guy? And when would he be showing up? It had only made you smirk to yourself. You wondered how they would react when they realised it was Danny? That man sure deserved to show you off tonight; what was wrong with being the eye-candy on his arm just this once? You wanted to prove that he could get the girl – and you had dressed up for him. Not for anyone else. Still, you were flattered by Javi’s compliment “Thank you…” He placed a bottle of your favourite coloured wine on the table, and by the label clearly an expensive one; “Danny says nothing less than the top shelf will do tonight. So he’s really treating you. As I knew he would…” Javier smiled “You’re really good news for him… You know?” “…SO many people tell me that, like’s he’s bad news.” “He’s had his ups and downs. Especially in his love life. They are quite some stories…” He lent on his hand; “But the way he talks about you… man… it’s something else…” You were determined not to blush, so you expertly changed the subject “What about you? Shouldn’t you be out with someone special tonight?” “ME! You’re the best I got. I’m single.” “Single!? NO!” You pulled out your mobile “Are you serious?!” He nodded and then got suspicious as you typed something into it “…Why?” “…Because, honey, do I know the girl for you…” “OH, really?! Matchmaking?” “Yes really… And you’ve already kinda met her….” If you could do a little matchmaking in Danny’s restaurant, why not? After all, it was your interaction with Danny here that had got you together. He raised an eyebrow, and took a breath “Is it the crazy one?” “Define crazy…?” You grinned, knowing both your friends had been flirting with him “Y’know the… order everything off the menu, drunk on Friday night, don’t ask me any questions, staring at me a lot, type crazy one.” “…Would you have a problem if it was…?” He chewed his lip for a moment and then smiled; “I dunno… I think I could go for a little crazy.” You laughed, and wrote her number down on a napkin; “Her name is Amanda, and she’s very dear to me. Be nice.” “What are you doing?! You have got to be kidding? I have to wait two days for you to call my number and you’re just giving yours out to Javi?!” Danny shook his head and folded his arms as he stopped at your table. He had changed out of his chefs’ whites into a black button-up shirt, his attempt to look smart for your date. It worked, in a Danny kind of way. “No…” You looked at him innocently “…I was simply doing a little matchmaking…” “Is that so…” He smiled and leant in to kiss your cheek. He turned to Javi, who stood to take his leave “When you’re ready, my good man, Jason knows how it goes…” “Alright! I’m on it!”

Danny slid into the seat that Javier had just vacated and blew out a breath; “You look… I just… Words… honestly fail me…” You smiled “Well… I just wanted to look good for you.” “For me!? Darlin’, you needn’t have you always look good. Tonight you look…” He made a motion to indicate he couldn’t find the right word. “And everyone is quite rightly staring at you…” “At you…” You leant on your hand, “…I like that…” “Oh. Really…” He reached for the bottle Javier had placed on the table and poured you a sensible glass full “Yeah. It’s about time people knew I was yours…” He chuckled, “Alright… Sweetheart… Well, you’ve clearly made one hell of a point…” He placed his hands together “…Now in advance, I apologise that I can’t stay. But I sure as hell want to make these hours count…” “Baby that’s ok…” “And when I leave, I don’t expect you to stay… It’s going to be a long night. And I’ll be here helping them out until closing. So…” He took a sip of wine, and made a face like he was pleased with his choice “…Please, feel free to leave at any time.” “No… No… That’s ok… I want to stay… I have my car… You can just come back to mine tonight…” He smirked suddenly and leant towards you; “Oh? Is that where this is heading…? A little cliché for Valentine’s Day don’t you think…?” You suddenly realised what you had said; “Danny no! I didn’t mean it like that-!” “No need to be shy about it Y/N… It’s just you and me…” His eyes flicked to the cut of your dress. You were still determined not to blush, lowering your voice to a whisper; “Stop it! You can’t talk like that! Not here!” “Why not? It’s my restaurant… My rules… No-one cares… Why, baby? Don’t you want me?” You had to look away from his intense stare… But you bit your lip… Wondering if that was where your night might end… You ran your finger lazily around the rim of your glass whilst he took another sip of his “I didn’t say I didn’t want you…” You looked back into his eyes, pouring some sugar of your own; “I just said you can’t talk that way here…” He was right. He knew you. Every off-menu dish he’d created was something you’d talked endlessly about or a variation of something off his menu you truly loved. You realised that every time he’d seen you eat he’d studied you – to the letter. Everything went well together, and everything paired with the wine he’d selected. You were beyond flattered. He continued to flirt with you through the entire meal and you felt like the only girl in the world. Even though your aim had been quite the opposite. He was way too good to you for the man his family made him out to be. “…Oh. Yeah. Just one thing…” He shuffled around in his seat and began rummaging in his pocket it got you curious “…I… Kinda broke your rule…” You could swear your heart was about stop beating and instinctively put your hand over it in relief. You opened your mouth as he placed the box on the table, It was small, black and wrapped intricately with silver ribbon. By its size and shape that he wasn’t about to get down on one knee in the middle of his own restaurant, especially after the previous conversations you’d had here. He followed your train of thought; “Geez! Don’t die on me! Give me SOME credit! I am in NO way sickeningly cliché enough to propose to you in front of my whole restaurant... on Valentine’s Day. Besides I’d never live it down!” He was right, Javier and Jason would never let him hear the end of it. Then he laughed, like he couldn’t resist it “Maybe I’ll do it when we’re alone later!” Still, the joke didn’t ruin the way you felt and you almost had to stop yourself from crying; “Oh! Danny!” “Now it’s not much… But I wanted you to have something…” He slid the box towards you; “You can’t open it until I’m gone… though, ok?” “…You didn’t have to.” “I know. You made that clear. But I wanted to…” He smiled, and poured himself another glass. He looked around the restaurant. It was in a lull period, before the next sitting, and he was glad he’d get to sit with you for a little while longer, at least until you had finished.

When the restaurant started to get busy again, you knew he had to take his leave. “I’m sorry I can’t stay longer.” “No. No… Baby, go do your job…” He stood and rounded the table to kiss you again. It didn’t last nearly long enough; “I promise not to make you wait too long…” But you didn’t mind. You could at least watch him working. “Thank you, for coming here!” “I love coming here!” “I know but… I wish I could have taken you out…” “You’ll get the chance.” You winked “I get to see the guys too…” “True…” He smiled “…See you later. And honestly… Go… Don’t sit here on my account!” Although, he knew you’d wait there forever if you had to. On his way back to the kitchen he was stopped by another long-term patron. You loved to see Danny laughing, but as he did so he nodded and looked across to you. You couldn’t help but smile until it hurt. This was what you wanted. You wanted them to realise what he had. The man Danny Rayburn really was. And that look of adoration on his face, that was for you… And it wasn’t the only time he was stopped...

* “How you doing? Can I get you anything else? Another drink…? Coffee?” Javier came over to clear away the plates; “Was it good?” “Incredible.” “I told you he was excited…” “I’ll uh... Take you up on coffee, Javi, that would be great. Put in a shot of Bailey’s too.” “Well, that sounds like an idea…” “Oh. And, the check.” “The check-!? Danny will NOT let you pay.” Javier looked taken aback by the very idea. “Javi, He can’t do that again. Let me.” “…Amorcita… I don’t know… Half this stuff was off menu I don’t know if I can…” “Just do your best… Please… Let me pay.” He still seemed hesitant “Look. If I drink any more… Those can go on the house, just… Let me pay. Let me pay all of you, too, with all the hard work you guys do? You deserve it.” “Okay… But this was all your idea…” “Thank you…” You handed him your card and he went off to get your coffee too. When he came back you had pulled the box closer to you; “Here you are… And your coffee… Call me if you need anything else…” “I won’t hesitate… Thank you Javi…” You scribbled out your signature and pulled delicately at the silver ribbon until it unravelled. You were curious… It wasn’t anything so cliché as chocolates or flowers by the size of the box… What would Danny break your one rule in favour of? You lifted the lid gently and had to smile, touching your hand to your chest. The fine gold chain winked in the gentle restaurant candle light as you lifted it delicately from the box, it ran smooth through your fingers as you studied it. Sitting on the end, however was the exact answer to your question. Small, plain, but with symbolism that could not be understated, was a delicate cursive initial. D, for Danny.

The next time the restaurant buzz died to quiet you realised how late it must be getting. As you looked up from your phone you witnessed Jason leave the kitchen. If Danny was letting his staff go, it must have been near the end of the night. Jase caught your eye and wandered over; “Y/N! Have you had a good evening.” “Letting Danny go for a couple of hours was very kind of you Jason… Yeah. I’ve had a great time… I guess it isn’t over yet!” “No, but, should be soon. The kitchen is winding down, Danny said he can take care of the dessert now. Which, for Danny is a big thing. You know he hates baking right? Says it’s all about Chemistry… but cooking… That’s about feel!” He rolled his eyes and you hated to laugh at the way he imitated Danny, but that was exactly something he would say “…Like he doesn’t know what Chemistry is. When he has you…!” He grinned, “I dunno. Anyway, if Danny can handle it, we’re almost done. He won’t keep you waiting much longer.” “How you spending the rest of your evening? You got someone special?” “Yeah, my girl’s pretty understanding. I’ll take her out properly tomorrow… But I’m sure there’s enough evening left to make something of it. Make sure you do to, when he’s finished, alright?” “I will. Now get on to your girl!” He smiled “See you soon Y/N!” He walked away, but then turned and call back down the restaurant “It looks good on you! By the way!” You realised he was talking about the necklace, and you looked down. Its length allowed it to be more visible the deeper the cut of whatever you were wearing. You guessed that was the point, people were more likely to stare at you if you were wearing something that showed your skin. So, it was best to show them that you were already taken. At least, that’s probably how Danny’s feelings went – you didn’t think he was so insecure. He just as likely wasn’t one to put up with another guy putting his eyes on you.

Your phone eventually buzzed and you couldn’t help but laugh out loud at the text; Are you at Dannys!? Maybe… 😉 Did you give me NUMBER to the waiter we had?! And If I did? C’mon. Amanda, you were so into him… I can’t believe you!! Have fun – you’re welcome! At that moment, you heard laughing and the kitchen doors swung open again to more staff leaving. Including Javi, now out of uniform, who interestingly had his phone in his hand. He waved to you, but Danny caught him; “OY! Who said anything about you leaving your tables aren’t all clear!” “What!? C’mon Danny! There’s one left!” “If all your tables aren’t done, you don’t go!” “But she’s…” Danny gave him a significant warning look, making Javi sigh and wander over to you. You nodded to his phone; “Anything I should be interested in.” He grinned “Yeah, matchmaking service… We’re heading out for drinks.” “Wow. You move fast! I thought she had a date.” “It clearly went well…” He gave a wink and then looked to the table. Every other table was neatly cleared and stacked, awaiting usage tomorrow. You were the only one left down this end of the restaurant “So, Danny won’t let me go unless my tables are clear… So… I guess I’m not drinking until you leave…” You got up slowly; “No, let me help you – don’t want you to miss a date I basically initiated…!” You smiled, content to help him carry things back to the kitchen, still chatting excitedly about his plans. Danny sighed; “She can have some of your pay check for that!” “Aw – c’mon! It’s clear now!” How many times was Danny going to threaten to take away his pay check this month?! “Yeah, alright! Off you go!” Danny turned to you; “Sit down Darlin’, at least I can watch you from here now…” He gave a wink as you sat yourself at the bar, Javi came back around and could not resist wrapping his arms around you and kissing your cheek; “Goodnight Amorcita!” Danny shook his head “…Don’t bother coming back tomorrow!” He yelled after Javi, who laughed “You don’t mean that! You love me really!” That had you and Danny laughing; “Good luck on your date! Let me know how it goes!” He waved to you “I will Y/N!” Turning back to Danny you realised the kitchen was now empty besides him. And the two tables left were finishing up their drinks and paying their tabs. Danny was essentially just clearing away; “Give me half an hour sweetheart and I’ll be done…” “What’s thirty minutes more?” You shrugged. You loved watching him work, you were a little disappointed you’d missed out. Still, watching him clear away meant you were one minute closer to having him in your arms again. *

Finally he waltzed out of his kitchen, bag over his shoulder. He didn’t come to you immediately, instead walking to the back of the restaurant, checking everything was clear and ready for tomorrow and flicking off lights as he made his way back to you. “OK… We can go…” He took your hand in his as he helped you off the bar stool and you wrapped your arm around his. He liked that. You could tell by his smile. Once outside it wasn’t as cold as you would think, even for February. He kept your hand in his as he locked the door; “So, you like it?” You noticed him look across to the necklace, now flashing in the streetlights. “Like it? Danny… I love it…” You got the feeling now it was on, you would never take it off. “Really?” He smiled; “Good… It looks better on you… I’m almost proud of myself. Bet you’re glad I broke that rule.” “…Yeah. This once…” He pocketed his keys, and walked you to your car. You felt alright for driving, thank goodness. You hadn’t had too much to drink and you had eaten enough. You were just about to pull your keys from your bag when he stopped. You weren’t paying attention, so you were pulled back by his arm. You were about to voice your question when he looked at you; sincerely. “Dance with me.” “…What?” “I didn’t get to take you out properly… Dance with me…” You looked around; here? In the middle of the restaurant parking lot? Was he serious? “Danny, there’s no music? Without music?” He shook his head “We don’t need music. You should know that.” When you still didn’t respond he sighed, letting you go he put his bag down, and held his hand out to you, taking up what you recognised to be an awkward version of a Waltz stance. You took a breath, and smiling, you put your hand in his. He placed his other hand gently on your waist and pulled you closer to him. Placing your other hand on his shoulder you laced your fingers together, and he began to sway you. “You’re crazy… you know that?” “And yet, you’re the one dancing with me…” He smiled, as you relaxed into his arms, resting your head against his chest as he continued to rock you. Bringing your hand in, he placed it against his heart; and you quickly realised that you were dancing to the rhythm of his heartbeat. He kissed your hair, and then your forehead, brushing his cheek against yours to get just that little bit closer to you. The way he enveloped your body with his was protective; and you felt safer now than you had ever felt in anyone else’s arms. The only sound was the cars that occasionally drove passed on their way back from Valentine’s Dates of their own. You wondered how many passengers in them looked over and saw the two of you, moving in a circle under the yellow glow of the floodlit parking lot – and thought you were insane. But you couldn’t have cared less… You were lost in his motion, in the way he held you - as strong as it was delicate – his attempt to show you he would hold you forever but that he would never break you… Any part of you. And you knew that included your heart. You thought it was dangerous for him to make that promise; but you badly wanted it to be true. Your rhythm came to a gentle stop, but he continued to let you get lost in his embrace. Your fingers tangling themselves in the fabric of his shirt, telling Danny you wouldn’t let him go either… You looked up to him; and his blue eyes glowed in the wake of the lighting. He kissed your forehead, the bridge and tip of your nose and finally your lips. You wound your arms around his shoulders and let the kiss linger as long as he would allow. Full of further unspeakable promises. He broke it, finally and chuckled; “Let’s go home…”

* “UGH!” Danny collapsed on your couch. Now changed into a grey vest top and shorts he ran his hands over his face and through his hair; “That was HELL! Never let me do something like that again!!!” He tipped his head back, making you laugh; “Well. There’s always next year.” “Oh GOD! I’ve only just gone though this year! Remind me to take the day off!” “I wouldn’t let you do that to them!” He made a sound that was painful; “God. I need a drink…” “What a great idea… I like your train of thought…” You wandered over to one of your cupboards and pulled down a bottle and two tumblers. He raised an eyebrow in curiosity; “Is that… whisky? Girl, I like the way you think.” “… I think you’ll find Woodford Reserve brands itself as Kentucky Bourbon…” You looked across to him “Is it a two or three fingers type night?” He laughed; “Three, at LEAST!” You poured him a generous two and a half, and poured nothing more than a dribble for you. A night cap. That was all you wanted. You put the bottle away and handed him the glass. You loved the way Woodford tasted. It wasn’t sweet, it had a savoury quality but by God did it have a burn, it was that that made it your favourite. You took a sip, he studied his glass and then looked back to you; “What? No ice?!” You pointed to your fridge “You have legs!” He puffed his cheeks and narrowed his eyes but he clearly wasn’t about to get up; “Cheers…!” He swirled it before taking a sip, you watched the way he rolled the liquid over his tongue before swallowing, and the breath he let out as it burned; “Oh-! That is good!” You nodded your agreement as he sat back. Now he really allowed himself to study you, he already knew what you were wearing was gorgeous. The deep-V neckline, now complete with his very own initial. The split up the side showed your beautifully tanned legs, giving him just enough but leaving him wanting so much more… it hugged your figure well too. He hadn’t forgotten your little conversation back at his restaurant… Now he was just wondering if you would act on it, or not. “You are so, damn, beautiful…” His voice was quiet, and it edged on sinful promise. You took another sip and looked back to him, then wished you hadn’t at the look on his face. The look in his eyes. Your heart began to pound in your chest. “…Don’t look at me like that…” “Baby…” He shook his head, running is fingers over his lips in a way that sent shivers over your skin; “Why not…” “Because I…” You had to look away, look to your balcony, then to your wall…To anything but his eyes – you couldn’t hold that stare. You noted how deep the breaths you were taking were… Your stomach and your heart and your HEAD were all in agreement on this one. It was Valentine’s Day, why not act on this…? Eventually your eyes had to wander back to his. He was leaning back casually on your couch, and had you locked in his intense gaze. He tapped his finger against the side of the whisky glass that he was holding casually by the rim – he was waiting on you and you knew it. He read you too well, and Danny was always hard for you to resist…

You realised that you too were tapping your glass, but for a different reason; the nerves were building up inside of you… You somehow tore your gaze away from him again. And it fell to your glass; gripping it so tight your knuckles were white… If you were going to do this, then it was your house. And your rules. Decisively you tipped the glass back to finish it and set it down. Walking over to him, slow, confident, with purpose. You would make him wait for you… brushing your hair back you gave him a look to let him know that you were going to be in control here. He ran his eyes back up you again, and by the time they reached your eyes they were dark blue. You sank yourself down onto his lap, straddling him. Locking your legs with his, your feet barely touched the floor as he was sat so far back. You ran your tongue over your lips and took his glass from him, taking one sip for yourself you placed it on the table beside you. He gave an almost defiant whine; you pulled him to you by his top; “My house… My rules…” He seemed to agree with this as you pulled him into a kiss; tasting like whisky that lingered on his tongue he ran his hands up your smooth thighs, hitching your dress just a little higher as you wound your arms around his shoulders to deepen the kiss…. You were now locked in a completely different form of dance…. He hummed gently in approval at the way you ground your hips into his. Continuing to run his fingers over every inch of skin he could get his hands on; he kept his voice low, almost a whisper as he kissed your neck; "You know, now would be a perfect time to start a playlist..." You almost laughed, digging your nails gently into his biceps; and catching his lips with your again; "That would just make it something else..." He squinted slightly; "Darlin'... We've always been about something else..." He ran his hands through your hair, kissing your beautifully tanned skin over and over "...That is why we work so well..." You accepted his kisses with kisses of your own, but he certainly wasn't affording you breathing space; and soon he had you breathless again. Not only that, but he had the situation back under his control. Kissing you wherever he wanted, he offered resistance and held you back from kissing him - that made you whine in discontent - which is exactly what he was looking for; by the smirk on his face. "...That's it baby girl..." His voice, seductive, was back to giving you that shiver; only this time it ran through him too... So he let you kiss him... running his hands back down your body they lingered for a second at the ties on your dress, before he thought better of it. You felt him shift under you, and then he swept you up. You gasped, leaving his lips and gripping his shoulders tight. He cleared his throat, as he began to walk you towards your bedroom; "Mmmh.... There isn't nearly enough room here to do everything I want to do to you tonight..." He let his husky whisper linger for a moment, with a sinful wink. Trouble was, whatever that promise was... You couldn't wait.

** You woke up without him, and you weren’t sure you liked that. Looking around for any signs of where he might be you were disappointed not to find any. Surely, he wouldn’t have gone off to work already? Considering how late it was last night!? And if he did, wouldn’t he have left a note? You hopped out of bed, pulling on a shirt and shorts of your own and wandered out into the corridor. You almost breathed a sigh of relief when you heard sounds emanating from your kitchen and echoing down to your bedroom. Guess it was finally time you took him up on breakfast… You shuffled down the hall and stood watching him for a minute. He was adsorbed in everything he was doing, moving from one thing to another – he hummed to himself. “Mornin’…” “Good morning Sunshine…” He turned to smile at you “…How are you?” You suppressed a yawn; “Good. Yeah… You’re making me breakfast?!” “Figured that you couldn’t say no to this…” He teased… but then made a face “Actually, I’m trying to make you breakfast… uh, note to Y/N… Please actually stock ingredients!” “Uh, note to Danny, you don’t live here. I will have in this house what I damn well like!” He shook his head “You’re lucky I can make what I’m making! Nothing in your cupboards constitutes a balanced meal, I’m shocked you’re still alive!” “…Well I usually spend all my time at work! When do I get the chance to eat here? Let alone cook.” “That’s no good for you either. And you have an extremely sweet tooth, I’m worried.” You shrugged “It doesn’t bother me!” “No clearly…” he opened another cupboard and lamented “…C’mon… You’re killing me here!” “Well, I didn’t ever expect my boyfriend to be a chef..!” “Well, your boyfriend thinks he needs to take you grocery shopping…” You leant on your counter with a smile; “So… Do it!” He turned to you “…OK… I will… If it gets you eating better, I will.” You shook your head at him, until he pointed to the breakfast bar; “Now sit! I’ll be done in a minute.” “Don’t you want me to help?” “No, Darlin’, this is for you. Sit.” He insisted. Finally you understood what Danny meant as he set everything out for you. Everything was simple, and most of it was leaning towards the sweet side of breakfast. You stared at the pancakes for a minute; “Are there sprinkles in the pancakes?” “Yeaaaah...” You scoffed; “Alright, international house of pancakes...” He narrowed his eyes at you and tapped you with his fork “I’m just trying to make things interesting! And with your limited amount of ingredients I worked with what I had...!” You pointed to the sauce “Syrup?” He looked like he was about to give up on you entirely “... Caramel. Easy to make butter, cream, sugar. Surprised you had those to be honest.” “Ah. You’re being very resourceful...” You clearly weren’t awake yet, pointing out to yourself that there was actually already a syrup bottle on the table. “God, please let me take you shopping...” “What today?” He hummed tilting his head one way and then the other “if that’s what you wanna do, Darlin’...” “I kinda don’t wanna do anything… But… I feel like you’re only gonna complain at me if we don’t…” He didn’t quite nod his agreement, but he took your hand in his and rested it on your knee “…If we do… Then at least I can cook for you more often.” “Are you really THAT worried?” “Yeah. I really am.” And you had to smile, because not only was he being sweet – he was also being serious.

What Danny really admired about you was the way you ate. As a chef that was important to him, and it was important you liked what he made you. But the way you thought about every bite you took impressed him. He couldn’t help but love you more as he watched you eat; “What?” “…You… You just… Amaze me, sometimes…” But he pointed to your plate with his fork “Just, less sugar. Next time. Please?” You got this innocent but defiant look on your face as you tilted your head “…Well, I can’t get ALL my sugar from you…” He laughed, and then leant towards you to brush sugar from your lips with his own. It was a good move, and was rewarded by you pulling his shirt to bring his body closer to yours. He deepened his kiss and all that did was threaten for you to take it back to the bedroom. You pulled away, savouring the taste of his lips on yours for just a moment longer; “Hmmm…” He agreed satisfied “I guess you’re right.”

*** Later that morning you found yourself on a short road-trip; because he was serious about taking you grocery shopping and apparently no other day would do. But now he was driving you, humming along to the radio. It was another nice day, and he had the windows down and his shades on. He looked hot, you had to admit, he was just something else and you were damn proud that he was sitting here beside you. You couldn’t resist texting Amanda, knowing you wanted all the gossip from her night with Javier. It wasn’t like they didn’t ask for every excruciating detail of every date Danny ever took you on. You always remained mysterious about it; Danny showed too much of himself to you and all of it was for you to keep. Not to tell anyone else. Did you wake up with a 10? I didn’t wake up with anybody Amanda! I’m shocked! What happened!? I’m taking it slow. How’s your 10? Well, he’s at least a 12. But yeah, I woke up with him 😉 Ugh. You are beyond lucky. I know. I knnnnow x You were laughing, which got Danny curious. “What?” he nudged your arm when you shook your head “What’s so funny!?” “Nothin’! I’m just…” you waved your hands “Complimenting my awesome boyfriend.” “OH!” He smirked; “IS he now!?” “Well he better damn well think he is too.” “He, uh, I guess he thinks he could be. I mean… He has you.” He let you take his hand in yours; “Well… He takes good care of me… Which is what matters. As he’s proving right now.” “Yeah well. Someone’s gotta do it!” He laughed “Of course I’m happy to do it…!” “Well anything to stop him complaining.” You could tell he was rolling his eyes behind his shades; “Eh….!! I’m not sure he’ll ever do that.” “Shame…” You shook your head “I love him anyway…” “He wants you to know…” he laced your fingers together and looked across to you “He loves you too.”

* You were both tangled up together on your balcony in the late afternoon sun, having the best of lazy days. Your head against his chest as he stroked his hand absentmindedly through your hair… You knew you could stay like this forever… Hell, maybe after your next move you would get that wish. “Danny…” “Hmm?” He blew out smoke in answer, taking another drag of his cigarette as you shuffled around, producing a box tied up in blue ribbon. “I’m actually kinda glad you broke your promise, Because… Now I get to give you this…” He shook his head, “You didn’t have to get ME anything…” Although his eyes flicked to the necklace you were still wearing proudly… He rested his cigarette in the ash tray and took the box from you, “Are you sure?” “Yes!” “…Seriously you didn’t have to.” “I wanted to, too. Anyway, this one is important…” He looked to the box, pulling the blue ribbon slowly he met your eyes again. Would this be as important to you as that necklace was to him? he wondered. You sighed; “Danny! Just open the damn thing the suspense is killing me!” He gave it his full attention as he lifted the lid gently. Then looked a little confused as he was presented with a set of keys; “Are these… The keys to your apartment…?” He lifted them from the box and studied them with careful interest. “…You’re giving me the keys to your apartment?” “No…” You were careful with your choice of words, “Well. No, yeah that’s what they are, but that’s not what I’m asking.” He turned his attention to you out of curiosity… You took a deep breath. Only your parents had keys to this apartment besides you. But, you’d already made up your mind on this one. Danny wasn’t just someone you were seeing, he was the man you wanted to spend the rest of your life with. And it wasn’t Valentine’s Day, or whisky or heck even sugar talking. This was pure and simple; it was the way you felt and you had to let him know it. You looked at him with nothing but adoration; “Danny… I’m asking, please, and in the most real… honest, wholehearted way I can… For you to move in with me.”

@stcphstrange - Protect this one with your life! It’s been through a lot!!

#Danny Rayburn #Danny Rayburn x Reader #Bloodline #Ben Mendelsohn #danny rayburn x you #Linzi Writes #Linzi Queues Things #Sway #5 #Liliana #Valentines Fic!

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twopoppies · 6 years

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Historical AU Fic Recs

I was asked by @zsolounamanzana to recommend some historical fics (sorry love, I accidentally deleted your ask!). I don’t actually read historical AUs that often, so I will probably end up recommending ones you already know, but here’s a bunch I really liked. I hope there’s some here for you:

Threadbare by kiwikero / @icanhazzalou

Harry Styles was eight years old when Louis Tomlinson kept him from falling into a machine in a Manchester textile mill.

He was 18 years old when nothing, not even the threat of death, could keep Harry from falling in love with Louis.

Howls Like A Beast (You Flower, You Feast) by @indiaalphawhiskey

France, 1754. Château de Versailles.

“You don’t love me,” Louis had said, utterly blasé as he callously fractured the heart of a Harry that was just barely eighteen.

“I do,” Harry had insisted pleadingly, green eyes already watering.

Louis had rolled his eyes, exasperated and flippant in the way only beautiful, young boys could be when faced with the affections of a baby prince. He had run his finger down Harry’s cheek then, had forced him to look into his eyes as he delivered the final blow.

“You’ll change your mind once you’ve seen more of the world,” Louis had teased, pressing a brutally delicate kiss onto Harry’s lovely, pure cheek. “Once you’ve been properly defiled.” He had whispered filthily, delighted by the gasp he heard, the frantic pink blush that had rested high on Harry’s cheeks, the power he had felt at knowing he could make the Crown Prince squirm.

To Honor by Awriterwrites / @a-writerwrites

#46. It's Getting a Little Hard

Ech day me comëth tydinges thre, For wel swithë sore ben he: The on is that Ich shal hennë, That other that Ich not whennë, The thriddë is my mestë carë, That Ich not whider Ich shal farë.

**** Each Very grievous are they One must go hence Do not know when Greatest grief Do not know whither I must go

-Unknown, Medieval English lyrics

Commander Styles leads his men to victory, but at what cost?

And down the long and silent street by whimsicule

The year is 1881 and if you’re alone in this world you might as well be dead, because starving dogs have no mercy.

Or: Wherein Louis and Harry are on the opposite ends of the social ladder, but their paths still cross on the filthy streets Louis calls his home. The odds are staked against them from the beginning, and even more when Louis' past finally catches up with him.

Atlas At Last by @louisandthealien

He doesn’t know what he had been expecting out of the road trip itself besides burping contests and too much shitty gas station food with Oli and Stan, but in the brief moment before Harry ambles up his driveway, Louis idly wonders if this is about to become some sort of Gay Coming of Age story.

Maine to California in ten days. In which Zayn’s an open-shirt hippie they meet somewhere in Ohio, Liam’s the pastor’s son running away from home, and Niall’s the number they call on the bathroom wall.

It’s 1978. Harry and Louis are just trying to get to San Fran in time for the Queen concert.

No One Like You by myownspark / @myownsparknow

Dear Niall,

I was glad to have the chance to talk with you again at the AHA conference. Your idea that the Musee D’Orsay Tomlinson painting is in fact not a self-portrait is an intriguing one, and I may have discovered something that will have a bearing on that theory.

Some background: as you may remember, I’ve been researching for a book I’m writing about Harry Styles. I’ve been in communication with Styles’ last living descendant, who is in possession of a trunk that her family believed to have belonged to Styles himself. It held some personal items she presumes to be his, including two unmounted paintings and a small collection of letters.

Upon spending the last few days in Provins studying these items, I believe there to be a connection between Tomlinson and Styles, and I would very much like your opinion.

Are you up for a trip to France?

Sincerely, Liam Payne

Where Liam and Niall are art historians discovering the truth about two nineteenth century painters on opposite sides of an artistic divide.

The Man Who Saw The Devil by @metal-eye

"The Devil was staring at him.

"Louis shifted slightly in his seat and scratched the back of his neck, picking up his program and reading the title of the play again: L’homme qui a vu le Diable.

"He was wearing a satin red suit, one that certainly stood out amongst the usual greys and blacks of other Paris theatres, and instead of merely appearing the two times that the main character summoned him, this Devil followed the other men around on stage as they spoke and played cards. He kept looking over their shoulders and mocking their awkward movements, jerks and twitches compared to his own lithe prowl. The theatre audience, most readily impressed by gruesome effects and sensationalism, couldn’t take their eyes off him.

"Neither could Louis."

Paris, 1912. Louis is a frequent patron of the Theatre du Grand Guignol. Harry is a performer. Tonight he's playing the Devil.

The Case Of The (Definitely Not Haunted) Styles Mansion by Anonymous

“So there’s a sense of humor buried beneath all that condescension, huh?” Louis said when he’d stopped laughing.

“It’s not condescension, it’s intelligence. I understand you might not be able to recognize it yourself,” Marcel said, then slapped a hand over his mouth. “Oh god, I’m sorry.”

Louis stepped closer, his eyes on Marcel’s face. “For being an asshat?”

“For being rude,” Marcel said, from beneath his palm.

Louis shifted a half-step closer until he was at the very edge of Marcel’s personal space. It felt like he was nudging at it, asking to be let in. Marcel flushed hot for no reason.

“Lucky for you it takes quite a lot to actually insult me,” Louis said taking one step closer. Too close. Too close.

Marcel met Louis’ eyes. Those blue eyes that reminded Marcel of poetry instead of science, lyrics instead of formulas. They were so pretty he wanted to drown in them.

---

Or the Nancy Drew AU where Marcel is a man of logic, Louis is a private detective who believes in ghosts, and the Styles Mansion is definitely, absolutely, positively *not* haunted.

Through Eerie Chaos by MediaWhore / @mediawhorefics

For as long as anyone can remember, Old Hillsbridge Manor has always been believed to be haunted. Everyone in the village agrees and keeps a respectful, fearful, distance. New in town after a bad breakup and an internship that led to disappointment rather than a permanent job, Harry Styles figures taking pictures of the decrepit building could be a great new creative project. Or at least a much-needed distraction while he searches for a job and crashes at his parents’ new house. No one warned him about the apparitions though; about the music, the laughter, the people who flicker and vanish when you call after them, the echoes of a past that should be long gone… Harry has never believed in spirits but even he can admit that there’s something weird going on. What starts as mere curiosity evolves into a full-blown investigation and soon enough, Harry finds himself making friends with an aristocrat from the 1920s and struggling with finding the best way to tell him that he’s dead.

The Ghost Hunter AU where Niall lives to prove ghosts are real, Zayn is a skeptical librarian and Harry gets caught up in a century-old mystery and catches feeling in the process.

We’re What’s Right In This World by BriaMaria / @briannamarguerite

“Why did you talk like that in Brighton? If you weren’t planning on ever telling me?” Louis asked. “Is it because you think you’re going to die?”

“It’s war, Lou,” Harry said finally.

The words were a knife slipped between his ribs. Everything hurt and he was bleeding. He shifted up, his palms cradling Harry’s jaw, his lips against his boy’s. Not kissing, just resting there, so Louis could feel him. “Promise you’ll come back to me.”

Harry’s hands smoothed down the sides of Louis’ body. “You know I can’t do that. I’ll never lie to you.”

“Promise me. We’re going to have our cottage. And our dogs. And our breakfast in the garden where nothing grows because of the wind from the sea. Promise me.”

“I won’t.” Stubborn as always, his boy. “I’ll promise you, I’ll love you all my life. I’ll promise you, you’ll never leave my thoughts. I’ll promise you, you’re my forever and my always. But promising you something I can’t cheapens the things I can.” ---- Or the World War II AU where Harry goes off to fight and all Louis wants to do is be the boy who brings him home.

Paint The Sky With Stars by kiwikero / @icanhazzalou

On 10 April 1912, Harry Styles boards the finest ship the world has ever seen. Still grieving the death of their mother, he and his sister are being sent to America to live with a callous uncle who cares more about his business connections than family. Harry prepares himself for a long, disappointing voyage alone in his stateroom.

Louis Tomlinson has borrowed and saved, and finally has enough to purchase a Third Class ticket to America. With all of his belongings in a single ruck sack, he boards the Titanic filled with hope for a brighter future. Never one to sit still, he can’t resist exploring the massive ship, and soon goes sneaking into First Class in a stolen steward’s uniform.

By a twist of fate, Louis finds himself in Harry’s stateroom, entranced by the most attractive man he’s ever laid eyes on. He keeps returning day after day, even if he doesn’t understand what it is about Harry that continues pulling him in. That’s all right; Louis has a week to figure it out, and Harry is plenty willing to help.

Except they don’t have a week. They have four days. Because on 15 April, their entire world will be turned upside down.

Or, the historically accurate Titanic AU with a happy ending.

Say Hallelujah, Say Goodnight by @alivingfire

Louis is an angel who is just a little too bad to be good, Harry is a demon who is just a little too good to be bad, and they're both a little too in love to be impartial when angels and demons go to war.

Louis has been alive since life was a mere concept; he watched the summoning of Man into existence, he was there when Eve took the apple. He’s seen seas break the world into separate pieces, he’s watched empires crumble into dust. He’s seen wildfire consume cities, he’s seen the world painted white with snow. He has known the most beautiful humans to walk the planet, he has watched the most powerful mortals gather their riches and influence around them and then die just like the poorest, weakest humans do. He’s met humans whose motives defy explanation, people who use their lives as battering rams, as tools, as weapons, as chess pieces.

None of that stopped Louis in his tracks.

But Harry did.

If you haven’t read Butterfly Gun and you can find someone who has it downloaded (it’s been deleted), read that...it’s set in the 1940′s if I recall correctly and it’s beautifully written.

I haven’t read this one yet, but it was highly recommended to me. It’s a WIP, but the writing is apparently is finished:

Victorian Boy by DonnaHaywardsHead

Victorian AU. Harry the virgin Duke of Somerset knows little of love, while Louis the sly Duke of Warwick knows too much. When the two dukes come together for the Bilsdale fox hunt in York, Harry finds himself drawn into Louis' bed. But when secrets from Louis' dark past come to light, Harry fears that the fox isn't the only one being hunted.

This is another I haven’t had a chance to read but friends told me is wonderful:

Back To You And Tennesee by rippedgloves

Louis Tomlinson rises to rock and roll fame at age twenty three and is thrown into a life of luxury and excess, but being on stage isn’t easy for a boy who has always stuck to the side-lines, and Louis struggles to deal with his new fame as he joins the Grand Ole Opry and is sent out on tour with names like Liam Payne and Elvis Presley. His life takes a turn, however, when his childhood role model, Harry Styles, joins them on tour, and the two become closer than two men in the spotlight are allowed to be.

OR, the one where Louis is Johnny Cash and Harry is June Carter

#my fic rec #mine #larry fic rec #historical au

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just-a-nerdy-queer-girl · 6 years

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Greetings

Dear Stranger,

Hi.

This is not my first attempt at creating a blog. I’ve tried a few times. I’ve tried making a blog about books, posting my reviews, my TBRs and book related pictures. After a few weeks of not gaining a single follower I ditched the idea. I made another blog all about depression. Fun. I deleted that pretty fast. I was a mixture between surprised and sad that all the posts I found in my dashboard and re-blogged I actually related to. A lot. Worse still, I actually gained a lot of followers in the four days I kept that blog. Then of course there’s the blog that I keep for people who actually know me, where I keep up the facade that I’m completely fine all the time.

I’ve tried a bunch of different blogs in the hopes of becoming a well known blogger. Wow, that’s really embarrassing to admit.

Anyways, I was sitting in class today, reading the ebook on my phone under the table, all sneaky like. The current book I’m reading is “Symptoms of Being Human” (it’s pretty good you should check it out). Now in this book the main character is gender-fluid and her doctor tells her she should try making a blog and sharing how she feels. Anyways, Riley (the main character), like I, thought it was a load of crap but after writing her first post she had the thought, and quote:

Son of a bitch; blogging is therapeutic.

Of course Riley instantly gains a follower (because that’s super realistic) and then Riley feels all good and empowered, yadah, yadah, yadah.

So of course, sitting in English I suddenly have the urge to create a blog and become tumblr famous (eye roll). As the day goes by this thought sits at thee back of my mind.

Now there’s something you need to know about me before I go over. I suck at communicating my feelings. Like I’m really, really, REALLY bad at it. As in haven’t-cried-in-seven-years-because-that’s-showing-emotion bad. I hate feeling vulnerable, or weak, or exposed. So I keep it all bottled up (because that’s a smart thing to do). Whenever I do start to share, my chest gets all tight and I feel sick and start to hyperventilate.

So anyways, over the day I began to wonder what my newest blog would be about (I’d pretty much done most things). I think back to how raw and honest Riley’s post was and how good she felt after posting it. I wonder what that must feel like. What being able to get things off your chest that you can’t do with a face must feel like.

So that’s how this happened.

Except this time, I don’t actually give a damn whether or not I get followers. This is for me, and anyone else who might relate. I don’t care if I have a thousand followers, or one hundred, or ten or even no followers. This is just my space to get things out.

I hope once I’ve posted this I’ll be able to think, “Son of a bitch; blogging is therapeutic.”

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sky-bluepinksunset · 7 years

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All of them ya Jobbie

DELETED THIS HALFWAY THROUGH SO TAKE II BITCHES 1: My name? Bryce! 2: Do I have any nicknames? B, Kennedy when I'm in trouble, BK, babe3: Zodiac sign? Aries4: Video game I play to chill, not to win? Grand Theft Auto V5: Book/series I reread? Harry Potter but Goblet of Fire especially 6: Aliens or ghosts? Leaning more towards ghosts?? 7: Writer I trust enough to read whatever they write? Not sure? Don't really follow authors well8: Favourite radio station? 104.5, not that it means a lot to you, but it's called "The Beat of Knoxville" and plays mostly rap and hip hop 9: Favourite flavour of anything? Cinnamon 10: The word that I use all the time to describe something great? Insane lmaooo11: Favourite song? Of all time?? Either 12: The question you ask new friends to get to know them better? Favorite song usually!! 13: Favourite word? Probably 14: The last person who hurt me, did I forgive them? Yeah, you're going to be miserable if you're bitter. 15: Last song I listened to? Praying by Kesha16: TV show I always recommend? B99 as of super recent 17: Pirates or ninjas? Pirates 18: Movie I watch when I'm feeling down? I normally binge tv series I've seen before 19: Song that I always start my shuffle with/wake-up song/always-on-a-loop song? Issues by Julia Michaels because it's a BOP Also Home by Edward Sharpe20: Favourite video games? GTA, Literally NEVER ashamed to admit to Mario Super Bros, Life is Strange is pretty good! Also quite like Subnautica sue me 21: What am I most afraid of? Failure I think22: A good quality of mine? I help people?? Idk lmao 23: A bad quality of mine? Losing discipline when trying to do something 24: Cats or dogs? BOTH25: Actor/actress you trust enough to watch whatever they're in? Evelyne Brochu 26: Favourite season? Fall 27: Am I in a relationship? Nope 28: Something I miss? Band a lot29: My best friend? Ur gay ass30: Eye colour? Blue! 31: Hair colour? Currently a silver blonde 32: Someone I love? Cameron33: Someone I trust? You34: Someone I always think about? Chekov and Sulu 🙄🙄35: Am I excited about anything? Yep! 36: My current obsession? Buzzfeedblue37: Favourite TV shows as a child? Wizards of Waverly Place, iCarly, either of the Zach and Cody shows 38: Do I have someone of the opposite sex that I can tell everything to? Yeah! 39: Am I superstitious? About some things like salt over your shoulder and sweeping your feet40: What do I think about most? Again Chulu or college 41: Do I have any strange phobias? Mm I have a fear of dying or disappearing and my room being a mess 42: Do I prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it? Behind 43: Favourite hobbies? Writing 44: Last book I read? People's History of the US45: Last film I watched? Not sure? 46: Do I play any instruments? Flute, piccolo and alto flute! 47: Favourite animal? Otter, shark, pit bulls48: Top 5 blog on Tumblr that I follow?49: Superpower I wish I could have? Teleporting could be cool50: How do I destress? Watch shit or exercise 51: Do I like confrontation? NOPE52: When do I feel most at peace? Not really sure53: What makes me smile? Silly conversations 54: Do I sleep with the lights on or off? Off I'm not an ANIMAL 55: Play any sports? Nope, used to play softball and basketball 56: What is my song of the week? The Louvre57: Favourite drink? Coffee 58: When did I last send a handwritten letter to somebody? I have no idea 59: Afraid of heights? Healthily 60: Pet peeve? Oppression I guess?? 61: What was the last concert I went to see? Mary Lambert 62: Am I vegetarian/vegan/pescatarian? I want to go back vegetarian or vegan!! 63: What occupation did I want to do when I was younger? A veterinarian 64: Have I ever had a friend turn enemy? Yeah one but I just hold a grudge over nothing 65: What fictional universe would I like to be a part of? Star Trek or HP66: Something I worry about? Making wrong decisions 67: Scared of the dark? Sorta 68: Who are my best friends? U and Nicole69: What do I admire most about others? Their talents!! 70: Can I sing? Nope 71: Something I wish I could do? Lose weight easier lmao 72: If I won the lottery, what would I do? Travel! 73: Have I ever skipped school? Once74: Favourite place on the planet? Haven't found it yet 75: Where do I want to live? Scotland right now76: Do I have any pets? Yeah a bunch 77: What is my current desktop picture? Currently it's Nomi and Anaminita78: Early bird or night owl? Night owl 79: Sunsets or sunrise? Sunsets I think 80: Can I drive? Yeah! Love it 81: Story behind my last kiss? Don't wanna talk about it lmao 82: Earphones or headphones? Earphones 83: Have I ever had braces? Nope 84: Story behind one of my scars? I got rock stuck in my elbow from a bike fall 85: Favourite genre of music? Indie86: Who is my hero? I have no idea 87: Favourite comic book character? Wonder Woman atm 88: What makes me really angry? Oppression again 89: Kindle or real book? Real book but I don't mind kindles at all 90: Favourite sporty activity? Band??? Dk if that counts 91: What is one thing that isn’t tight in schools that should be? "Isn't tight" But the whole phone situation 92: What was my favourite subject at school? English 93: Siblings? 2 brothers and 3 sisters 94: What was the last thing I bought? I bought gas and dinner for the fam 95: How tall am I? 5'11 I think 96: Can I cook? Not extremely complicated 97: Can I bake? Yeah really well!98: 3 things I love? Trips, the sky, great plots 99: 3 things I hate? Shopping, restlessness trying to sleep, work atm100: Do I have more girl friends or boy friends? More girl friends 101: Who do I get on with better, girls or boys? Both equally well102: Where was I born? Maryville, TN103: Sexual orientation? Bi104: Where do I currently live? Maryville lmao 105: Last person I texted? You 106: Last time I cried? I think earlier over a video 107: Guilty pleasure? conspiracy theories 108: Favourite Youtuber? Buzzfeedblue at the moment KILL ME 109: A photo of myself. 110: Do I like selfies? Sometimes!111: Favourite game app? Don't really know 112: My relationship with my parents? Yeah could be worse 113: Favourite accents? French, Indian and Kenyan I think 114: A place I have not been but wish to visit? Anywhere in Europe 115: Favourite number? 24116: Can I juggle? Nope and don't have any desire to 117: Am I religious? Sorta 118: Do I like space? Yeah 119: Do I like the deep ocean? Yes! 120: Am I much of a daredevil? No not remotely 121: Am I allergic to anything? Nope 122: Can I curl my tongue? Yes123: Can I wiggle my ears? Nope124: Do I like clowns? I don't hate them 125: The Beatles or Elvis? Actually can't stand Elvis 126: My current project? Getting myself better in different ways 127: Am I a bad loser? Yeaaaaah128: Do I admit when I wrong? Sometimes129: Forest or beach? Forest 130: Favourite piece of advice? Breathe 131: Am I a good liar I think so? Don't love to do it 132: Hogwarts house / Divergent faction / Hunger Games district? Ravenclaw/ Amity or Erudite / No clue 133: Do I talk to myself? Yeah 134: Am I very social? Nope 135: Do I like gossip? Nope 136: Do I keep a journal/diary? I wish I had! I need to start 137: Have I ever hopelessly failed a test? Yeah lmao138: Do I believe in second chances? Yes 139: If I found a wallet full of cash on the ground, what would I do? Leave it, like I wouldn't turn it in because I don't want to be put on one of those shifty videos yk140: Do I believe people are capable of change? Always 141: Have I ever been underweight? Nope 142: Am I ticklish? Yeah I HATE it 143: Have I ever been in a submarine? Nope144: Have I ever been on a plane? Twice 145: In a film about my life, who would I cast as myself, friends and family? A bunch of my faves that don't have to look anything alike 146: Have I ever been overweight? YUP147: Do I have any piercings? Currently just the one ear hole, let the others close up 148: Which fictional character do I wish was real? Suluuuuu149: Do I have any tattoos? Not yet150: What is the best decision I have made in life so far? Not sure! Possibly college choice soon 151: Do I believe in Karma? Yes152: Do I wear glasses or contacts? Glasses but they're broken atm 153: What was my first car? Pontiac G6 2005 154: Do I want children? Yup 155: Who is the most intelligent person I know? The Spirko family 156: My most embarrassing memory? 157: What makes me nostalgic? Pictures of band 158: Have I ever pulled an all-nighter? Yeah I hate it 159: Which do I value more in others, brains or beauty? Brains 160: What colour mostly dominates my wardrobe? Teal 161: Have I ever had a paranormal experience? Yep 162: What do I hate most about myself? How I look 163: What do I love most about myself? My thought process 164: Do I like adventure? Yeah who doesn't 165: Do I believe in fate? Skeptical but yeah 166: Favourite animal? Answered above but otters and sharks and pits 167: Have I ever been on radio? Nope 168: Have I ever been on TV? Yeah 169: How old am I? 17 170: One of my favourite quotes? The stars would be proud to know they made someone like you 171: Do I hold grudges? Yeahhh172: Do I trust easily? Kinda 173: Have I learnt from my mistakes? I hope 174: Best gift I’ve ever received? Not really sure but probably Kenya 175: Do I dream? Yeah 176: Have I ever had a night terror? Yep177: Do I remember my dreams, and what is one that comes to mind? When I was 8, I had a dream my family was trying to kill me and I woke up screaming 178: An experience that has made me stronger? Taking care of Cam from a young age 179: If I were immortal, what would I do? Fuckin LIVE 180: Do I like shopping? Absolutely not 181: If I could get away with a crime, what would I choose to do? Rob a bank I need some money 182: What does “family” mean to me? Anyone who makes you feel loved183: What is my spirit animal? Probably a sloth or elephant or smth lmao 184: How do I want to be remembered? Hopeful 185: If I could master one skill, what would I choose? Cooking 186: What is my greatest failure? Not sure 187: What is my greatest achievement? Again not sure 188: Love or money? Love 189: Love or career? At the sacrifice of another, it seems pointless 190: If I could time travel, where and when would I want to go? Probably back to grandpa 191: What makes me the happiest? Being out with friends I think 192: What is “home” to me? Hard to describe but definitely where you're relaxed and motivated and I think it's more an idea?? Like you're with certain people maybe 193: What motivates me? Not wanting to be embarrassed 194: If I could choose my last words, what would they be? Probably try to quote a shit book 195: Would I ever want to encounter aliens? Absolutely BEAM ME UP 196: A movie that scared me as a child? Sweeney Todd197: Something I hated as a child that I like now? Naps 198: Zombies or vampires? Vampires probably 199: Live in the city or suburbs? City right now! Currently in the country so it'll be an experience 200: Dragons or wizards? Wizards 201: A nightmare that has stayed with me? Again the family murdering me thing 202: How do I define love? Home 203: Do I judge a book by its cover? Yeah too often 204: Have I ever had my heart broken? Yes205: Do I like my handwriting? Oddly enough, yeah? 206: Sweet or savoury? Savory 207: Worst job I’ve had? Taco Bell by default 208: Do I collect anything? Shells! 209: Item of clothing or jewellery you’ll never see me without? I wear my Kati bag because I keep my cigarettes in it 210: What is on my bucket list? Stealing yours but defo northern lights 211: How do I handle anger? Snapping and apologizing, or ignoring everyone 212: Was I named after anyone? Bryce was after a Bengals football player, and my mom and dad argue between Kennedy being after a DJ in Cincinnati or the president 213: Do I use sarcasm a lot? NOPE 214: What TV character am I most like? Mix of Gina and Rosa and Amy off b99 215: What is the weirdest talent I have? Guessing tv plots 216: Favourite fictional character? Nomi or Sulu That took a full 45 minutes

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ratmonologue · 7 years

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You know the drill, all tHE ASKS

Why

Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? I don’t actually use any of them

is your room messy or clean? Room is okay, but desk looks like a war zone

what color are your eyes? brown

do you like your name? why? Yeah? It’s fairly unique but it’s spelled how it sounds, which is nice. And I’m used to it so

what is your relationship status? in a polyamorous relationship with about a dozen fictional characters

describe your personality in 3 words or less um…. obsessive, spontaneous, triestobeagoodfriendbutidkhowconsistentlyisucceed (that counts as one word right?)

what color hair do you have? brown

what kind of car do you drive? color? 20 years old and don’t have a driver’s licence eyyyy

where do you shop? At stores? Mostly of the grocery variety

how would you describe your style? Pretty casual I guess. Jeans and tanktops/t-shirts, dark colors, boots, army jacket

favorite social media account Does the OT count as social media? If so that

what size bed do you have? Sad little twin-sized mattress with very broken innersprings (yay college apartments)

any siblings? one younger sister

if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? I’m honestly loving Edinburgh so staying here for the time being would be great

favorite snapchat filter? don’t have snapchat, so don’t know

favorite makeup brand(s) whatever’s cheap and doesn’t smudge

how many times a week do you shower? Usually every other day, so, like, 3-4. If it’s hot out then closer to 5-6

favorite tv show? FIREFLY. With additional special mentions to Blackadder, M*A*S*H, and Merlin

shoe size? US size? UK size? European size? CAN YOU TELL I’VE HAD A CONFUSING TIME SHOE SHOPPING OVER HERE??? (US 8, Euro 39, UK a Mystery)

how tall are you? 5′5″

sandals or sneakers? COMBAT BOOTS (but converse are second place so sneakers)

do you go to the gym? pfffft no

describe your dream date A ride in the Millennium Falcon with Han Solo would be pretty cool

how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? *checks* around £55

what color socks are you wearing? not wearing socks

how many pillows do you sleep with? two

do you have a job? what do you do? college student who really does need to start thinking about an actual job, seeing as how they’re graduating in a few months

how many friends do you have? I think that number really depends on where you draw the what-defines-a-friend line but, um, a decent enough number I guess? I do need more irl friends over here though

whats the worst thing you have ever done? Some high school friends and I were kinda shitty to this one girl in our group, so maybe that. Idk, I’ve done a lot of small-ish terrible things but nothing super dramatic so it’s hard to pick one as the /worst/

whats your favorite candle scent? IKEA had this one green-apple-scented candle that to this day I wish I would have bought.

3 favorite boy names That’s so hard to narrow down and now all I can think of are fictional characters that I like. Um… *throws darts at mental dartboard* Sam, Nathan, Adrian. Although those might be pretty heavily influenced by the fact that I’ve met awesome people with all of those names so. For fictional characters, Kaz Brekker is a fantastic name, as is Han Solo, as is Ronan Lynch, and…. I should stop. There are so many names that I like though

3 favorite girl names Same problem as above. *throws more mental darts* Sierra, Lyra, Clare

favorite actor? I’m currently in watch-everything-that-Diego-Luna-has-ever-been-in mode. More long-term favorites are Harrison Ford and Richard Armitage

favorite actress? Catherine Tate is pretty fantabulous.

who is your celebrity crush? I like how the question asks for “crush,” singular

favorite movie? Raiders of the Lost Ark and Jurassic Park

do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? Not as much as I used to. Favorites (yes, plural) include The Book Thief, Six of Crows, Illuminae, Inkspell, The Dream Thieves, Half Moon Investigations, and so many more…..

money or brains? For me or in others? Either way, both is always nice xD

do you have a nickname? what is it? Well the OT crew knows me as Clary so. My camp counselor name was Coconut

how many times have you been to the hospital? I’ve been to the ER once or twice, but I don’t think I’ve ever stayed overnight in a hospital

top 10 favorite songs How dare you. Okay, um…. *tries to pick from a variety of bands and not just my 1-2 faves* Save Yourself, I’ll Hold Them Back (MCR), Daze (Poets of the Fall), When Everything Comes to an End (Plan Three), Brush it Off (Plan Three), Boulevard of Broken Dreams (Green Day), Morning Tide (PotF), Subrosa (Plan Three), What About Now (Daughtry), Ambulance (MCR), Rogue (PotF)…. that’s ten…. that didn’t even come CLOSE to covering them all (and so much for a variety of bands, heh)

do you take any medications daily? nope

what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) Pretty normal? Maybe slightly on the oily side

what is your biggest fear? jellyfish and plane crashes

how many kids do you want? ZERO, ZIP, ZILCH, NADA, NONE, KEINE, NUL. NO THANK YOU.

whats your go to hair style? Well seeing as how my hair’s kinda too short to do much with it, either down or in a partial ponytail

what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) grimy old student apartment woohoo

who is your role model? Nina Zenik

what was the last compliment you received? I have no idea

what was the last text you sent? “Honestly though I can’t say I’d mind if he actually did invade my hotel room. He’s one of the few people that could get away with it ;D” …..I’m not sure whether the context would make this better or worse

how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real? 8, maybe? There was never a dramatic earth-shattering reveal; understanding was kinda gradual

what is your dream car? a spaceship

opinion on smoking? it’s disgusting why would you ever

do you go to college? yes

what is your dream job? underwater archaeologist by day, bestselling novelist by night. space pirate is also an option.

would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? Can I just say smack-dab in the city center? Is that not an option? Because that’s where I am now and I’m loving it.

do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? No but the last hotels I was in provided instant tea/coffee/hot chocolate packets and I stole all the hot chocolate packets

do you have freckles? no

do you smile for pictures? usually

how many pictures do you have on your phone? 1248. I need to delete a bunch.

have you ever peed in the woods? Yes, many times. I’ve also peed in the desert many times.

do you still watch cartoons? Yes, although different ones than from when I was a kid

do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? Neither, honestly

Favorite dipping sauce? There’s this one place in San Francisco whose french fries are, like, award-winning and they have a zillion dipping sauces, one of which is a lemon saffron aioli and it is heavenly.

what do you wear to bed? a t-shirt and sometimes pants, if it’s cold enough

have you ever won a spelling bee? no but I think I was in the top ten?

what are your hobbies? wasting time, reading, watching movies/tv shows, writing and drawing when I have the motivation

can you draw? Kind of?

do you play an instrument? Clarinet for 11 years, plus saxophone, mediocre piano, and mediocre guitar

what was the last concert you saw? Poets of the Fall. I died. Many times over.

tea or coffee? neither honestly, though tea if I absolutely had to pick

Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? Don’t really care

do you want to get married? If I somehow find a way to make fictional characters come to life, sure

what is your crush’s first and last initial? S.B.

are you going to change your last name when you get married? Unless I marry someone with an impossibly cool last name, no

what color looks best on you? probably black. purple and olive green look good too

do you miss anyone right now? The SOAR Squad

do you sleep with your door open or closed? Considering I share an apartment with five other students, closed, always

do you believe in ghosts? not really, no

what is your biggest pet peeve? When people are unwilling to look facts in the eye

last person you called? Maybe my mom?

favorite ice cream flavor? COOKIE DOUGH

regular oreos or golden oreos? Does golden mean no chocolate? If so then regular, why would you take away chocolate

chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? always chocolate

what shirt are you wearing? a purple one that for once isn’t fandom related

what is your phone background? Sir Gwaine in sunglasses

are you outgoing or shy? It honestly depends. I think I’ve gotten a lot better at pretending to be outgoing

do you like it when people play with your hair? Depends who that person is

do you like your neighbors? I’m gonna interpret this as apartment-mates and while I don’t really know them too well yeah they seem pretty alright

do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? Whenever I shower

have you ever been high? Only on sugar and sleep deprivation

have you ever been drunk? Yes, but not enough to black out or give me a hangover

last thing you ate? Cheesy bacon-ey mushroom-ey salsa-ey scrambled eggs

favorite lyrics right now “And now assassination is just the only waaaaayyyyyy…..” by the cowboys in Dr. Horrible

summer or winter? Winter if there’s snow, but summer’s great too. idk

day or night? Night

dark, milk, or white chocolate? All of the above?

favorite month? October has the best weather

what is your zodiac sign? go away

who was the last person you cried in front of? My friend Josh (some of you might know him as medieval dude 1.0) because I went to see Rogue One with him

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