#I have so many thoughts n feelings…. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

merakiui · 4 months

Note

PLEASE. please. if you would be so kind to give us some more stalker ex scara... the first time I saw it it just changed my brain chemistry, and I desperately need more </3

>:D thinking a lot about stalker ex Scara, but you get really drunk and he's the only one left to look after you......

(cw: yandere, nsfw, non-con, alcohol/intoxication, toxic ex scara, modern college au, connected to the previous stalker ex scara concept)

Just,,, the fact that he's been so good and sweet ever since he casually slid himself into your friend group and you're not sure if you can trust him, yet here you are being completely, utterly, stupidly vulnerable in front of your very unstable ex. orz

Kuni's not one for parties; in fact, he'd much rather spend his precious time doing quiet, comfortable things with you (cuddling is so much healthier than drinking, after all! <3). Unfortunately, you allow your foolish friends to talk you into attending these brain-rotting parties so you can get drunk off your ass, and he can't let you attend them by yourself because there are too many risks. If you got too comfortable with Venti or Kazuha or even Tighnari while drunk, Kuni would never forgive you. >:( he's worked too hard cultivating this friendly image for himself, and he isn't going to let you or anyone else ruin it.

But right now everyone else is too inebriated to do much of anything, and he hasn't touched the drinks ever since he arrived, instead choosing to anchor himself to some forgotten corner of the room. He sulks and broods in silence, a scowl plastered to his face. He's just barely tolerating it for your sake. It's because he loves you that he's doing any of this. Soon you won't even need any of these troublesome friends. Soon you'll just have him, and he's all you really need. It was like that when you were growing up, after all. Even though, as painful as it is, you don't seem so codependent, so swept up in romance... You're so independent now, no longer the shy, fearful thing from the final few months of your relationship with him. He'd be impressed if he wasn't trying so hard to isolate you from each of your friends. It's a challenge when he's trying to tiptoe around Heizou's sharp, witty perception or Venti's proclivity for knowing everything about everyone despite no one knowing much about him.

But he endures. He's gone years without you; this is nothing.

If you were smarter, you'd know not to trust a word he says. That kind, soft smile he's perfected for this act is not to be believed, especially not when he's using it to assure your friends that he'll bring you home safe and sound. Heizou has his doubts because it's late and you can hardly walk a straight line, but he's tipsy just like the others and it's hard to deliberate like this. Besides, when has Kuni ever let the group down? :)

He takes you back to his dorm instead because Albedo's not home and he has the entire room to himself. While you meander clumsily over to his bed, kicking your shoes off and shucking your jacket in the process, he watches. You have no idea how much he depends on you, how much he admires you, so much so that it surpasses love and lust entirely. Without you, he's nothing. Or that's what he thinks because for the majority of his life he's felt empty and sub-human and so alone. But now you're here, and you can fill those empty spaces in his heart and give him a reason to keep living.

You don't seem particularly fazed when the bed dips under his weight. Rather, you blink sleepily up at him when he leans over you, gingerly reaching to help you out of your sweater. You're too drunk to protest or struggle, and you feel so dizzy every time you open your eyes. It's difficult to remain fully conscious when sleep is tugging at your body, pulling you under. You don't even realize he's fit his mouth on yours until his tongue is pushing past your lips. You manage to place your hands against his chest, intending to push him away, but you're so exhausted and tired. They fall to your sides, useless.

Kuni sits up and smiles at you. He says something about you being dumb and cute... or something about how your friends are fools. You don't really catch all of his obsessive murmurings when your attention is waning. Clothes are torn off; he kisses you a lot. You're not sure if you're reciprocating, but it certainly sounds that way when you're whining beneath him, arching against sodden sheets, your breaths coming in pants and huffs each time he ruts into you.

He doesn't have to worry about anything. Right now, it's just you and him in a corner of the world, locked away from everyone who might try to take you away from him. It's not like you'll remember much come morning. You don't need to anyway. It's better if you're lost and bewildered. That way he'll be able to craft a story to suit his fancy. You'll believe it. You'll have no choice, and Kuni knows how to tell very believable tales.

#genshin chit chat #astolfofo #yandere scaramouche #tw: noncon #n/sfw #omg wait....... what if you're best friends with furina and scara feels so threatened because all of your friends are male #(heizou venti kazuha tighnari etc)#but now you have furina who seems to cling to you and it rubs scara the wrong way and and and!!!!!#orz i need to write for furina she's so beloved <3 #(with a fem reader) furina's sapphic yearning versus scara's obsessive pining...........#OH NO AND LYNEY....... the mouchey and lyney rivalry T_T #AAAAAA or furina x reader x arlecchino........#so many thoughts are written here and they're scrambled please forgive me >_<

407 notes · View notes

i-am-not-a-who-i-am-a-what · 2 months

Text

so about the header that proceeded today's statement:

Viability as agent: Low

Viability as subject: None

Viability as catalyst: Medium

i didn't know what to think of this part of the entry at first, but the longer the statement went on... was the institute in this universe trying to manufacture avatars?

the dice can't do anything without someone to use them, they can't be an "agent" by themselves, but might be capable of manipulation, so in that aspect their viability is "low."

the dice could be a "subject" in the sense that they could use further studying, but the statement itself was a very thorough investigation of their workings, so in that aspect their viability is "none."

the dice seem to influence their holder to roll them, or at least find more victims to roll them, and could therefore be described as a "catalyst" for someone's becoming. but, as seen in the statement, their owner can give the dice to someone else (albeit not without consequences), so in that aspect their viability is only "medium."

so what about the line following all this, what does "Recommend referral to Catalytics for Enrichment applicability assessment" mean? if we go by this interpretation, i'd say it could mean the institute wanted to find a way to make the dice even more potent as an artifact, maybe even remove that pesky ability for their owner to reject them.

imho all of this this brings a whole new level of context to the events of episode seven, of unknown violent agents going after an influx of objects that seemed straight out of artifact storage. was that the nature of the titular "magnus protocol" first mentioned in episode four, the one that involved the starkwall group? containing or destroying potential artifacts before the institute could get their hands on them?

it also makes their "gifted kids program," and sam's link to it as one of the kids being studied, all the more horrifying to think about. was it not just avatars in general they were after, but child avatars specifically? no wonder gertrude got so defensive over the possibility of sam and celia dragging gerry back into the institute's business last episode, we all picked up on her clearly knowing more than she's letting on but now we might know the shape of that information a bit better.

and one final bit of food for thought... this statement had a lot of familiar themes, didn't it? free will or the illusion of it, gambling and not-so-random chance, the statement giver being done in by one final hit from what feels like a bit of an addition... all hallmarks of a certain mother of puppets. doesn't it seem fitting that "chester" would use this kind of statement to warn sam about what harm pursuing the magnus institute could bring to him, considering the one his voice might draw from? and doesn't it seem so painfully ironic that his warning seems to have only driven sam further into that web?

#tmagp #the magnus protocol #tmagp spoilers #tmagp 9 spoilers #MANY THOUGHTS HEAD FULL AAAAAAAAAA #there are so many other things i want to link to this but i also just want to post it asap to get other people's thoughts #honestly at the word 'catalyst' my mind went straight to mike crew using ex altiora to become an avatar of the vast #combing through lietners until he found one that fit #and the statement giver from mag 4 feeling like he had to specifically sell ex altiora to gerry or it wouldn't 'count'#i can't pull out the episode quotes every time i have a theory or it becomes a bit passé but know they are always on my mind #also that last paragraph just came to me in a vision while i was typing up the rest of this i hope it's not too far of a reach #i tried to keep it vague but i'm also imagining jon banging his head against the inside of a crt monitor in frustration r/n #i still need to read the breakdown of the arg so if any info in that bolsters or discredits this please let me know!!!

304 notes · View notes

luck-of-the-drawings · 1 month

Text

so REVENGE, HUH? or justice, if that makes you feel better. it tastes the same when cooked just right. 'I REALLY WANTED A BROTHER.' such a shame to burn a bridge you so desperately wanted to keep, especially when it wasnt even you who started the fire. especially when you hope that not a single fragment of that bridge ever washes ashore.[MAY IT ROT FAR FROM MY SIGHTS] an unfortunate loss! atleast he has his friends.

#jrwi fanart #jrwi show #jrwi prime defenders #jrwi prime defenders spoilers #jrwi pd spoilers #jrwi pd #william wisp #vyncent sol #THIS ONE IS FUUUUCKIN OOOOOLLDD RAAAHHHHH i made it like. a year ago. but didnt finish it for so so long bc i just wasnt happy w it.#BUT LIKE A CENTURY EGG the decades of being encased in salt n lime n ash have done WELL to bring out the flavores of this piece #i sorta recently cleaned it up and posted it onto twitty. didnt tag it bc it was SO OLD AND SCUFFED(i see so many MISTAKES NOW)#that i didnt want to expose it to the open air just like that #if i show smth to my small circles then it shall only be understood in those small circles.#open air and open interpretation from minds i cannot predict are NOT something i enjoy the thought of. usually. i am brave tho #BUT EVERYONE ON TWITTY WAS SO NICEEE i was like damn... i guess it IS good enough to be enjoyed by the masses...#lets work on being nicer to our art together. THAT BEING SAID. i really love my colors here HELL YEAHHHH #FIRST TIME IN A WHILE COLORIN THESE BOYS.... i dont use proper color enough..I ALSO RLY LIKE MY BACKGROUNDS HERE #i LOVE when the bg is hyperrealistic (i frankestiened stock photos) and when the subjects are all flat colored n cartoony #recently rewatched Making Fiends and they do that similar thing!! soft shading! lotsa details! almost painted? ill paint one day #ive already rambled so much abt the art im runnin out of ROOm to ramble about WWWIILLIAM GODDAMN WWIIIISP. its been a minute since i saw-#-this episode..but i DO remember the funny smoke trick that will did to his funny brother. EVERYTIME U GIVE AN ORDER. THAT BRINGS HARM-#-INDIRECTLY OR NOT. YOU WILL HEAR THOSE SCREAMS. YOU WILL FEEL THAT PAIN. OHHH WHAT A COOL PUNISHMENT THAT IS #its still an olive branch in a sense! a final chance for big bro bell to show that hes NOT an irrideemable piece o shit. and if not #well. to the wolves of psychosis with him!!! i really think william did the best he could here. if i was in his shoes i have no doubt i-#-woulda done the same. IM ALSO GLAD THAT VYN DECIDED TO STICK AROUND N SUPPORT HIM! thas character development baybe!!#i loooove prime defenders.. its been so long since i watched any eps of it but i KNOW it still has such a grip on my heart..GOTTA rewatch i

209 notes · View notes

khattikeri · 5 days

Text

maybe a controversial opinion but while i really love jiang cheng as a character he is deeply self-centered as a person. and seeing people fight tooth and nail claiming he isn't, or is just misunderstood, or that he has genuine valid reasons to be selfish when plenty of other characters make the difficult choice to forego status and opportunities for what they believe is genuinely right to do (read: wei wuxian, wen ning, wen qing, lan wangji, jiang yanli, mianmian, etc.)

it's just odd to me. especially if they're talking about the novels.

mxtx didn't give jiang cheng the name "sandu shengshou" as a quirky coincidence. there's a REASON she named him & his sword after the 3 poisons of Buddhism (specifically ignorance, greed, and hatred). it's crucial to the story that jiang cheng is NOT selfless and that wei wuxian IS.

it's important to accept that wei wuxian is, by their society's standards, not morally gray; he represents several Buddhist ideals in direct contrast of jiang cheng and multiple people attest to wei wuxian's strong moral character, which is a lot of why jiang cheng even feels bitter about him to begin with.

it's crucial, because by the end of the novel jiang cheng realizes the extent of this and begins to let go!

the twin prides thing wasn't jiang cheng wanting them to 100% mirror the twin jades. he does care about wei wuxian, but he wanted wei wuxian to stay his right hand man, in part the way wei changze was for jiang fengmian.

and if there's one thing you can notice about wei changze in the novels, it's that literally nobody talks about him. he is only ever mentioned when his cool mysterious mountain sect wife cangse-sanren is mentioned, or (even more rarely) when they discuss him as a servant to jiang fengmian. regardless of jiang fengmian's own feelings, wei changze was considered lesser to him and didn't seem to outdo him, since nobody's out there years later still waxing poetry about wei changze's skills.

it may not be the only thing jiang cheng wants out of a twin pride dynamic, but it is a big part of it. regardless of his parents' intentions in taking wei wuxian in and treating him certain ways, this twin pride right-hand man thing is what jiang cheng has felt owed since childhood. he gave up his dogs for wei wuxian, people gossip about his sect heir position with wei wuxian there... jiang cheng wants the reciprocation of what he views as personal sacrifices.

he is ignorant to the depth of what wei wuxian must've suffered for over 6 years as a malnourished orphan child on the streets. he hates how wei wuxian's intelligence, witty charm, and cultivation abilities are naturally stronger than his own. he does care about wei wuxian a lot and want them to be together as sort of-brothers, sort of-friends, sort of-young master and sect servant...

...but if it's between that unclear (yet still caring) relationship and being able to save himself just a little bit more, jiang cheng nearly always manages to clam up in the face of danger and choose the latter, which ultimately benefits himself most. maybe it's a stretch to call that sort of thing greed, but it certainly isn't selfless.

there are of course plenty of justifications for this. it's his duty as sect heir. his home and sect was severely damaged by the wen attack and subsequent war; he had to protect himself, etc.

but doesn't that prove the point?

wei wuxian may be charming, but in terms of pure social standing, he is lower and far more susceptible to being punished or placed in harm's way by people who have more power and money. to protect wei wuxian, yunmeng jiang's long-term head disciple and semi-family member, even in the face of backlash and public scrutiny would've been the selfless thing to do. this is what wei wuxian does for the wen remnants in the burial mounds.

jiang cheng does not choose this. it's not even an unreasonable choice for him to make! nobody else in the great clans is doing such a thing, stepping out of line to take on a burden that could weaken them in the long-run. wei wuxian himself doesn't hate jiang cheng for it; he lets go of these things and focuses on what good he can do in the present.

jiang cheng thinks further into the future - what would happen to him if he continued vouching for wei wuxian and taking his side? what about jiang cheng's face, his sect's face? would wei wuxian even care to reciprocate somehow? everyone expects him to cut off wei wuxian for being dangerous, for threatening his position, for...

do you see what i mean? to call jiang cheng selfless for falling in line with exactly what people expected him to do after the war is not only wrong, it's foolish.

"but they faked their falling-out!" okay. why fake it to begin with, except to protect jiang cheng and the jiang sect's own face? is that selfless? who does it ultimately serve to protect? wei wuxian canonically internalizes the idea that he stains all that he touches, including lan wangji, and agrees to the fake fight because he doesn't want to cause the jiang sect harm. regardless, it eventually slides into a true falling-out, and in the end jiang cheng is more or less unscathed reputation-wise while wei wuxian falls.

that isn't selfless. it's many things! it's respecting his clan and his ancestors, it's making a good plan for the future of his sect and cultivation... but it isn't a truly selfless in the interest of what's right rather than in the interest of duty and what's good for him and his family lineage.

that brings me to my next point: even though wei wuxian hid the truth of the golden core transfer, jiang cheng spent nearly 20 years believing that the golden core "renewal" he was given was a birthright gift of wei wuxian's from baoshan-sanren, an immortal sect teacher of wei wuxian's mother's and a martial elder to wei wuxian.

of course we all know that's a big fat lie, but jiang cheng believed that wei wuxian gave up a critical emergency use gift to him for decades! he was lied to, yes, but jiang cheng immediately agreed without even needing to be convinced. the light in his dead eyes came back with hope the moment wei wuxian even said baoshan-sanren's name. he accepted wei wuxian's offer to give that up to him and take it via identity theft without missing a beat.

with how mysterious and revered baoshan-sanren is, that's obviously not a light sacrifice to just give up to anyone, no matter how close they might be to you. pretending to be wei wuxian to take the gift could even be considered dangerous. what if she found out and got offended? could wei wuxian be hurt by that?

jiang cheng doesn't even hesitate. wei wuxian is the one who mentions that if jiang cheng doesn't pretend to be him, the immortal master could get angry and they'd both be goners. and funnily enough, the day they do go to "the mountain", jiang cheng is the one worried and suspiciously wondering if wei wuxian was lying to him or had misremembered.

of course they've both been traumatized like hell prior to this point. but still: it speaks to how broken he was at the moment as well as to his character overall.

i digress: jiang cheng "gets his golden core back" via what he believed was a gift that should've been wei wuxian's to use in serious emergencies. rather than use it for himself, wei wuxian risked his own safety and gave it to jiang cheng... and jiang cheng still ends up embittered and angry, believing that wei wuxian is arrogant and selfish.

if he truly views them as 100% brothers and equals with no caveats, why would he think that way? it's not like he needs to grovel before wei wuxian for doing that, or to reciprocate... but this is what i mean when i say jiang cheng feels he is owed things by wei wuxian. wei wuxian's actions hold a very different weight in jiang cheng's mind, and jiang cheng himself doesn't ever act the same way, except once.

is it wrong for him to feel like he is owed something? it depends. many asian cultures, including my own, feel that a person owes their family in ways that may not make sense to westerners. for example, it's considered normal for a child to owe their parents for giving birth to them, or to other caretakers for feeding, clothing, sheltering, educating them, etc.

however, something like verbally saying "thank you" or "i'm sorry" to family is considered crazy- why would you owe that? you're supposed to inconvenience your family; saying thank you or sorry is the sort of thing you say to a stranger or acquaintance. i get half-seriously lectured by my elders on this a lot even now, even though they know such phrases are just considered good manners in the US.

this muddies up the idea of wei wuxian being jiang cheng's family vs his family's charge or servant even more. jiang cheng wants wei wuxian to be close... but ultimately doesn't really choose to use what power he DOES have to protect wei wuxian. he considers himself still owed something that in his mind wei wuxian flagrantly never repays.

this isn't even getting into how despite spending a majority of his time with the yiling patriarch he never once noticed that wei wuxian stopped using any spiritual power-based cultivation. even lan wangji, who met them far more rarely, realized that something was wrong and that wei wuxian had taken some sort of spiritual damage, hence the "come with me to gusu".

of course manpain is fun and i'm not immune to the juicy idea of them reconciling and talking things out... but jiang cheng is deeply mired in his own desire to be "above" wei wuxian in multiple ways, and doesn't realize the extent of wei wuxian's actions, the intentions behind them, and the consequences wei wuxian knowingly faced for them.

to not recognize this about jiang cheng, especially in the novels, is really revisionist if you ask me. i reiterate that i really do like him a lot. he's flawed, angry, traumatized and has poor coping mechanisms, an overall fascinating character... but he is not selfless nor ideal, and i seriously draw the line at people saying he is.

wen ning shoves this all into his face at lotus pier to disastrous results. it is the reason why jiang cheng's a total mess at guanyin temple, and the reason jiang cheng ultimately doesn't tell wei wuxian about the fact that he ran towards the wens on purpose.

for that one last act of his to have really been selfless, he needs to not seek anything in return. he did it purely because it was right to do to protect someone else. if that means wei wuxian never finds out about it, so be it.

that moment that ended up causing jiang cheng irreversible harm is not a debt that wei wuxian owes him. it hurts, but no matter how bitter it is, that realization is so important to him changing in the future.

#keri chats #mdzs #mo dao zu shi #jiang cheng #long post #this is NOT anti/crit for him btw i like him a lot i just feel like nobody interprets him the way i perceive him #which even then my interpretation is p nebulous... worth saying i also heavily disagree w ppl who think of him as an evil shithead #he's upper class & steeped in jianghu politics/self preservation. flawed as hell human being but they're all war criminals lbr it's #Magical Genocide and War Crimes: The Novel #anyway this post is messy as fuck but if u read all of it: thank u. if u agree with me: ilu. i wish more ppl understood revenge ethics #as they stand in asian cultures and history vs in western (almost always culturally christian) cultures #it's unclear how far in the future the extras are but at one pt he's ''the same as ever'' which at best indicates slow emotional growth #and like. ykw? i don't think he'll be repressed bitter angry thinking abt his losses n pain forever. i think he can grow i believe in him #i have so many thoughts on this i could've made this post go on forever augh

55 notes · View notes

upsidedowngrass · 1 year

Photo

HELLO here is............ reference art for my liam design/interpretation!!!!!! a lot of these r ideas ive already had and/or included in my liam art already BUT !!! now its all in ONE PLACE!!!! :)

#hfjone #liam plecak #hfjone liam #hfjone backpack #my art #i feel like there was more i couldve added but i sifted thru my liam ref art and couldnt find any #but!!!! im very happy w how i draw him so this was fun to put all in smth :)#esp bc i was able to explain my thought processes on him a bit more!!!! bc i put. SO much thought into how i draw him #its why my design for him changed like every week for a few months a good while back. was adding n adjusting stuff SM #this is not even counting the bone diagrams i made. i am not including the bone diagrams #(theyre just for limbs but ive spent a long time on this already and im TIRED its been over 5 hrs and it is now 2 am)#BUT!! this will be queued for a good time !!!so i may not be awake when this is posted lol!!!#(also i am VERY much willing to discuss my designs if thats smth anyone wants to ask abt.... i have so many ideas)#additional fun fact that i specifically dont draw his shoulder ANY higher than his pocket bc thats as high as it goes on my design #ANYWAY im tired so im gonna queue this now

240 notes · View notes

matchbet-allofthetime · 2 months

Text

I need so badly to make an MK au where Lord Raiden was a teen in the sixties and Lord Fujin was a teen in the late sixties/early-mid seventies

And they just encompass their decades as people

And Liu Kang would be so reminiscent of the 80s glam rock and hair bands and all

And then you'd have Kung Lao, who, even though him and Liu are similar ages, he'd be like a solid mix of 80s/90s

#anyway i have so many thoughts about this #mortal kombat #mk11 #mortal kombat 11 #kung lao #the greatest kung lao #liu kang #lord raiden #lord fujin #mk fujin #mk raiden #i just love the idea of kharacters embodying the norm for their circumstances in different decades #lao and liu totally jam to led zeppelin and temple of the dog and goo goo dolls together- no chance they don't #meanwhile while they also listen to them- they jam with fujin to heart and tom petty and the heartbreakers and shit #meanwhile fujin ALSO listens to stevie wonder and fleetwood mac and shit #raiden is all creedence clearwater rival and the beatles and the temptations and van morrison #also some marvin gaye and sam cook and the zombies and stevie wonder #so many ideas #liu and lao also love black sabbath and queen #oh!! funin loves the doobie brothers too #he listens to motley crue and acdc and guns n roses with liu and lao #me pushing my music tastes onto kharacters 😂👍#i mean i listen to everything under the sun but this feels so right to me for these kharacters idk why

42 notes · View notes

rosepompadour · 2 years

Photo

JACK & ROSE + PINING ON MAIN Rose and Jack face each other. She is trembling as he takes her right hand in his left. His other hand slides to the small of her back. It is an electrifying moment. Jack looks at her, and finds that they are suddenly very close together. It would be so easy to move another couple of inches, to kiss her. Rose seems to be thinking the same thing. - Titanic script

#titanic #perioddramaedit #perioddramacentral #romancegifs #titanicedit #perioddramasource #*#i don't care that they only knew each other for four days they are so obviously DES T I N E D #a girl never forgets her first ship #(ha ha ship)#the script is by far the weakest part of this movie but somehow you still believe in jack and rose's relationship #it doesn't feel like a teenage fling #it really feels like a genuine big time love affair #i wonder if it would have worked without kate and leo #as it is i KNOW in my HEART that they would have walked off the ship in new york hand-in-hand and lived happily ever after #in some crummy apartment where they don't even notice how small and cramped it is because they're so stupidly in love #i have many thoughts on this #so #many

615 notes · View notes

tuuuron · 2 years

Text

"Only by allowing strangers in, can we find new ways to be ourselves."

Angsty The World Ends With You fanart! I had a lot of fun with this! (As always, please click for quality)

#TWEWY #neku sakuraba #twewy joshua #the world ends with you #btw i did not play this game i watched streamer dollipdaze hollyhollowtones and snapscube improve the shib out of this game #i have rewatched that playthrough four times and have converted my sibling #also anime wasnt bad!#josh is still a lil shib but wow i really thought we were gonna get proper josh redemption arc #and more importantly neku in the other city n josh n cat kiba saving him #i have so many feelings about this #they sound incoherent but listen #the potential #my art #fanart #digital art #tuuuron

222 notes · View notes

cinna-bunnie · 5 days

Text

thought more about it and Imma move away from The City actually 🚶🏾‍♀️rant below

it doesn't get another year's fair chance, i do not have to try so hard to find happiness and community.. if i move to my other ideal city i actually already have a community waiting for me (⁠✿ ‚‚⌒‿⌒‚‚)

that at least sounds a lot more fun than what I've been up to here and i feel like i can figure it out from there. it is also so much cheaper out there 😶‍🌫️ rent prices are crazy.. i could get something around the same size w as many rooms for almost 40% less out there.

im not a city girl ૮ – ﻌ–ა im a big town/small city kinda person and have more fun w rural folk than i do city actually 😔👉🏾👈🏾 i feel like though i have learned a lot about myself and grown, I've always been v out of my element. i don't feel like i Live here yk.. i always feel like a visitor or like I'm just in between ideal circumstances waiting for something to change significantly lol. i have been here since 2016 (⁠´⁠-⁠﹏⁠-⁠`⁠；⁠) it sucks here actually and is the only place I've been to that's this.. impersonal? disconnected, isolating etc.

🚶🏾‍♀️ anyways, this sounds like a fun new chapter for me. i wonder where the queer folk kick it at.. where r the art meetups.. i have ppl to do fun outdoorsy stuff with already.. aa im so excited (⁠ ⁠ꈍ⁠ᴗ⁠ꈍ⁠) ♡⁠ i was hesitant to leave but there's not really reason to stay.

i have friends here ig but like.. it's Different out here, ppl don't wanna connect w you or know u necessarily.. they just wanna hang out sometimes, to a perplexing degree.. even if you're close it's just more like ur comfortable really. where is the vulnerability, where is the trust, participation in each other's lives 🤌🏾 y'all wouldn't b shutting yourselves in during a depressive episode if u let ppl be there for u, i love you and it hurts to not be able to help the person u care about knowing that they are having a hard time.

i go hard for the people i care about but no one goes hard for me (⁠´⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠.̫⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠`⁠) i just think maybe i should go to where people are already waiting for me and would be excited to have me join them. i am going to have a home, i think

#🐇#i have so many thoughts n feelings about this place.. and am having a lot of realizations in hindsight‚ especially compared to #other places I've lived. 3 other cities and all of them were what felt like the greatest yk? so like 🧍🏾‍♀️ what am i suffering for #what am i chasing? why do i have to try so hard to find joy in my time here when it would envelop me elsewhere?#having to move my stuff over is gonna be a hassle but I'll have help and it'll be a hassle anyways 🤷🏾‍♀️#the payoff would be life changing‚ actually #i think it is worth it in every way

8 notes · View notes

merakiui · 7 months

Note

Omg the octopus costume ask had me tears 😭

Imagine dressing up in an octopus costume for the Halloween bash-

I can already see reader making a horrible amount of octopus jokes/puns and Azul is just so done with it skjsjs

Omg I love that. To you, Floyd, and Jade? Another day of silly shenanigans. To Azul? Yet another reason to ban you from the lounge (although this threat is mostly empty because no matter what you're always allowed back in; you are his greatest weakness).

Do you know those costumes that are for two people? Like a camel or horse costume! What if it was something like that for an octopus costume and you and Jade or Floyd wear it together and since you're both underneath the fabric no one will see him getting handsy with you. >:) Jade or Floyd fucking you while you're both wearing the costume... Azul's going to wring both eels dead for touching his darling!!

#twisted chit chat #n/sfw #they're just trying to put more pressure on him so he'll confess his feelings to you #but the ways they go about it... so devious >:(#the twins can be the best or the worst wingmen ever (there is no in-between T_T)#WAIT OMG IT'S OCTOBER :O !!!!#i was so absorbed in my studies that i forgot we have entered spooky month...#thank you research papers for devouring my sense of time ;;;;;#now that it is spooky month there are many spooky thoughts to be discussed >:D

82 notes · View notes

endofbeginning · 24 days

Text

@eiqhties and @ytptennis tagged me to post 5 songs ive been listening to on repeat lately (thank u guys :D) this is the best tag game ever ok lets go...

the sensual world - kate bush

born to run - bruce springsteen

deep water (& go away) - strawberry switchblade

try me, i know we can make it - donna summer

president gas - the psychedelic furs

special mention to stars are stars by echo & the bunnymen and sabbra cadabra by black sabbath which i only added recently but ive basically already got them on loop 👍👍

(no pressure) tagging @uranium @parasprite @spinecutter @skunkstripe @s1urpee @boowomp @keemitthefeog & anyone else who wants to join in :]

#theres so many more i could have added 😭😭 i tried not to go too overboard #anyway soz if anyone i tagged has already done this and i missed it #or if its weird of me to tag ppl i havent rlly spoken much to x_x i just feel like ive seen u guys musicposting here n there so #thought yall might be interesteddd #music

10 notes · View notes

rooolt · 1 year

Text

It’s very easy to see the through line of the concept of a loss of innocence and naivety in grant and Lincoln because where we first meet them in their stories, they are young people. They’re at an age typically associated with concepts of naivety and innocence and so it is more glaringly apparent when they have these sort of life changing moments. It is an interesting thing to think about though, in relation to Darryl as a character and where we meet him in the story. Sure he’s a grown man and not “innocent” by any means, but he does have this interestingly childlike hero worship of Frank that allows him to sort of feel this loss too. Frank dies when Darryl is in college and thus never really got to grow up to a point where he could notice the flaws with his father. He was stuck in the mindset that he was the greatest guy in the world and all darryl had to do to be a good dad was be exactly like him. And then the forgotten realms happen. Not only does darryl watch grant go through such a traumatic shift causing him to realize that he can’t protect him his whole life, he gets to talk to Frank again. As an adult. The conversation with Frank where he tells darryl all the things that were actually wrong in their family is reminiscent of Lincoln’s relationship with grant in a way. In the same way Lincoln’s loss of innocence is first brought on by realizing grant isn’t this perfect paragon of fatherhood and morality, Darryl’s is brought on with a similar realization about Frank. Now of course it’s not exactly the same, Link transfers this realization to resentment as teenagers are wont to do and darryl uses this as a moment of growth and a sense of comfort in his own insecurities about being a father, I still find it to be a pretty fascinating parallel in exploring the Wilson family.

#11 pm? Roolt is long posting abt dndads again #Specifically darryl posting bc I have so many thoughts about him #Does this make sense? Bc I think about Darryl’s view of Frank so often #And the way it’s mirrored in Lincoln’s view of grant #Like oh my god full insane about it #I’m always insane about Frank Wilson’s role in the narrative I feel like we should talk about him more #N E ways long post out I go bed now #dndads #dungeons and daddies #darryl wilson

114 notes · View notes

otomotoelzhinee · 8 months

Text

I hope that answer was honest cause otherwise I'll look like an absolute idiot here.

This is actually interesting info, cause given the connection they seem to have on the show, while also having a serious lack of information about each other, gives us two options: It could be possible Shrike and Beebs used to be friends when they were younger, and life simply made it's thing and they had to split apart for a long, long time. Finding each other once again as adults and deciding to start a business together for the sake of that old friendship, cause y'know-- Who's better to trust out there to watch your back in such a hostile universe than an old friend?

It would explain why they seem to have this certain level of closeness to each other, almost knowing what the other is thinking, while at the same time feeling like two complete strangers. There was a gap in their lives that they don't know about, and are still not ready to share. It would also make any future reveals sting even more, cause what's worse than refusint to trust someone you used to share everything with long ago? I think it's an interesting perspective on friendship. Things change, people change, life changes. Shrike and Beebs are not the same people they were before, and that's scary. It's scary to be open and honest, to be vulnerable. It's not the same from when you were a kid, when you could swear everlasting friendship at the smallest act of kindness, that's not how things work.

The things they must've seen and gone through by themselves still hurt, and despite their past history together, it's still hard to imagine the other would understand-- why they did the things they did then.

But it could also give them the opportunity to reconnect once again, forming a far stronger bond than ever before, once they're aware of each other's experiences, mistakes, and fears. If they're getting along this well now, imagine how it would be once they feel safe enough with each other. To know for sure, that no matter what happens, they can still trust each other with their lives.

Or. Y'know. Maybe they just met in a random encounter in the current time and began talking, and decided to start a merc company cause they had no one else to turn to, and they tolerated eachother enough to try it <3

#monkey wrench #text #Otomo talks #I'm not saying reveals about eachothers past wouldn't hurt just cause they met so recently #It hurts when a friend doesn't feel like trusting you with things that should've been said before #No matter how many years or months you've been together #I'm just saying-- it could hurt a bit m o r e in the first scenario <3 #And I'm all for the emotional damage that comes with being a complex creature with too many thoughts n feelings #and sharing connections with other people #I believe the most plausible option is the second one. but it would be neat to find out the first idea is somewhat true #I'm excited either way for what's coming. Yall have no idea

23 notes · View notes