#I have unfortunately learned all these things about its horrible plot regardless

[middle-earth-mythopoeia]

No, Amazon’s Rings of Power is not “woke”

It annoys me so much when people complain about Rings of Power being “woke.” First of all, because of the way they overuse the word, woke has become a next-to-meaningless term that can be applied to anything conservatives don’t like. Second, Rings of Power is only progressive in the most surface-level way; underneath that it is in fact extremely regressive. People who whine about Rings of Power being woke are not only annoying, they’re also just plain wrong.

Ever since the casting was announced, right-wing idiots have been shrieking about Black actors being cast in Rings of Power. These trolls have made all kinds of dumb statements about how Middle-earth = Europe, but they seem willfully ignorant of the fact that Europe has never been exclusively white, and there is no reason to exclude people of color from the cast of any Tolkien adaptation. Still, this didn’t make the show progressive in its casting (which was tokenistic) or its writing (which ranges from bad to horrible).

For instance, the only storyline Amazon writers could apparently think of to introduce Arondir was literally him being enslaved. I mean, really? Is that really the best plotline to go with? To be clear, I’m not criticizing the actor, I’m criticizing the writing. In addition, Amazon cast actors of color overwhelmingly in parts invented for the show—rather than as actual Tolkien characters—which more easily allows them to be sidelined by the narrative, and the casting overall was in no way diverse enough. So I find it bizarre that people criticize the show for its so-called wokeness, when very little effort was made from a diversity and inclusion standpoint.

Right-wing nutjobs also threw a fit about Amazon portraying Galadriel as a warrior, to the point where they started calling her “Guyladriel.” They whined about Galadriel being too feminist and too masculine in the show, but that’s the opposite of what happened and betrays a fundamental misunderstanding of Galadriel as a character. First of all, she fought at Alqualondë in one version of the story, so no one should have a problem with her wielding a sword. What IS a problem is everything else about her portrayal.

Amazon’s writers took one of Tolkien’s most interesting characters and stripped her of her power, her authority, her gravitas, her wisdom, and her ambition. They had Gil-galad, her younger cousin, order her around. They had Elendil compare her to his children, even though she’s older than the sun and moon. And they made her a petty, naïve, incompetent brat whose entire first season involves being manipulated by Sauron, and as if that wasn’t bad enough, having a bizarre will-they-won’t-they relationship with him. In addition, Galadriel is canonically tall and strong, and one of her names means “man-maiden,” but they made her short and waif-like instead.

Galadriel in Amazon’s show doesn’t even resemble the character Tolkien wrote—the character named Nerwen, who never trusted Annatar, who certainly never had some creepy Reylo thing with him, who was powerful and wise and authoritative, who had a marvelous gift of insight into the minds of others—not a quippy, rude, annoying idiot who is constantly being controlled by the men around her. I don’t know why anyone would look at Rings of Power and think this portrayal is progressive. It’s actually a failure of imagination: Amazon’s writers literally cannot conceive of a powerful woman even when all of the work of imagining her has been done for them. In addition to the faux-feminist-and-actually-sexist portrayal of Galadriel, Rings of Power is also on the whole weirdly regressive from the standpoint of gender roles and gender expression. Tolkien’s Elves are canonically tall, beautiful, and long-haired, regardless of gender. Tolkien’s Dwarves all have beards. So what did Amazon do? They gave most of their male Elves short hair, while the female Elves still have long hair, and they did away with female Dwarves’ beards. They patted themselves on the back for “letting” Galadriel fight, but don’t show other female warriors—in battle scenes, for instance, why are all the soldiers male? In general, they made their characters adhere to conservative gender roles and gender expression, which is especially glaring because it contradicts what Tolkien actually wrote.

On top of all this, they decided to throw in some anti-Irish stereotypes with a side of classism, just for fun. They had the ragged, dirty, primitive Harfoots speaking in Irish accents, while the regal, ethereal, advanced Elves speak with English accents. None of the actors playing the Harfoots are Irish themselves, to my knowledge, which makes the choice to have them speak this way especially questionable. Seriously, who thought this was a good idea?

All in all, it makes absolutely no fucking sense to criticize Rings of Power for being woke. It may look progressive on the surface because there’s a Black Elf and a woman with a sword, but that’s as far as it goes. The show isn’t particularly diverse to begin with, and it treats its characters of color poorly. Galadriel’s portrayal is disgustingly regressive, as is the show’s overarching take on gender. This is to say nothing of the caliber of the writing in general, which is unsurprisingly low. There is so much to criticize—like the nonsense about mithril, or the fact that Celebrimbor of all people doesn’t understand alloys, or the fact that you can apparently swim across the Sundering Seas now—which makes complaining about the show’s supposed wokeness especially irrational.

I also have to wonder if the people still whining about wokeness know anything about Tolkien’s works. Do they know that the crown of Gondor was based on the crown of the Pharaohs of Egypt? Do they know that Tolkien considered Byzantium the basis for Minas Tirith? Do they know that female warriors already exist in Tolkien’s books? Do they know when they rant about how much they hate “Guyladriel” that Amazon’s portrayal is actually too feminine? Ultimately, people who complain about wokeness in Rings of Power—or any Tolkien adaptation—are just betraying their own idiocy. I honestly think if Tolkien’s books were published now conservatives would scream that they’re woke too.

#anti rings of power #my writing #to be clear I have not watched this monstrosity and never will #I have unfortunately learned all these things about its horrible plot regardless #please no one comment on this post telling me that I have to watch it in order to make criticisms - just no

[imbeccablee]

Becca, I need you to consider the following crossover: Yax/Luca au with Yakko as Alberto and Max as Luca

I see your "Yakko is Alberto and Max is Luca" and raise you this- Yakko is Luca, Wakko and Dot are Alberto, and Max is Giulia.

Bear with me. This is still Yax. And saying Yakko is Luca is a stretch, because I'm mostly thinking of second-act relationships and characterization. Yakko, Wakko, and Dot are still siblings and their characterization is still the same. I just don't think Max fits Luca's role that well, mostly because I don't think Goofy fits Daniela's role that well. Goofy's a good dad! I don't see him yelling at his kid just because he's simply talking about going to the surface. Goofy's pretty laid back, you know? I definitely don't think Goofy would send his kid away to the deep with his estranged brother, or whomever, just because Max snuck out and broke a rule. Maybe he'd be angry, but I don't think he could near to part with his kid. (Mind you, I think Daniela probably wouldve been torn apart if Luca had been sent away too. She loves him, she just doesn't understand him or respect him, I think. She thinks she knows best and never listened to what Luca wanted. Anyway.)

So in this au, Max would take Giulia's role as the human/toon friend that the siblings meet once they finally get off their island, which they were abandoned on by their parents or whomever. How they all meet could vary, maybe the siblings decide to stop waiting for caretakers who never cared to come back and set out for the land monster town by themselves, or maybe there's a Here Comes Giulia situation, where Max arrives at Isola del Mare and finds the siblings, then brings them to his home once he realizes they're all alone. Regardless, they meet and the siblings are absolutely fascinated by the land monster world. Yakko in particular, who had always had such a fascination with learning new things. Wakko takes to the land monster music and Dot becomes an expert in land monster fashion in less than an hour. They're all having a blast.

Except- as the days go by, Wakko and Dot have noticed Yakko spending a whole lot of time with Max, reading his books, going with him around the town. At first it doesn't bother them; the three of them are thick as thieves and would never abandon the others. Not like- well...

But the fear is there, and the two of them try to ignore it, try to convince themselves that Yakko may be fixating on the land monster stuff, but he cares more about them than he does about any of that. He has to, right?

But then, eventually, his topics start diverging from land monster stuff to just... Max. He never shuts up about him. And at first, maybe they humor their brother, because its fun teasing him about his crush, but then they realize oh shit what if he loves Max more than he loves us? What if he leaves with Max and never comes back? What if he doesn't need them anymore?

With no other outlet to release this growing anxiety, the two of them start to be brusque and rude to Max, something Yakko doesn't really understand. He's too caught up in the beauty of everything to see how afraid his siblings are of losing him.

I'm starting to just rewrite the movie but with the Warner siblings and Max, so I'm not exactly sure where to go from here that wouldn't just be a retelling. I don't think the siblings would split up at the end, no siree, but I do think they're be some kind of fight, maybe with Wakko or Dot yelling that they "wished they'd never left the island!" and Yakko, who has never been happier than he has been here, with his sibs and his friend and all the knowledge in the world, is just- shocked, heartbroken. He thought they were having fun, too. He thought this was a good thing.

And is was, to him. Coming to this town was the best thing that'd ever happened to him, and if his sibs didn't see that, if they weren't happy for him and wanted to just be back on that boring, stifling, horrible little island, then- "Why don't you just go back?!"

And there's quiet, and shock, and before Yakko can calm down enough to realize what he'd told them to do, one of them says, "Okay."

And then the two of them leave.

Anyway, like I said, I don't have any other ideas at the moment for plot conflict. I wouldn't want to just copy the Portorosso cup race because there's four of them now and there's no real reason for it if there isn't the "we have to run away so your parents don't send you to the deep" plotline. But I think it's a very good idea, Gabby! I realize I kinda made it too much sibling stuff and not enough Yax, but unfortunately sibling angst is my jam (as if Separated wasn't enough of an indicator akdjakdjaj) so it was bound to happen!

If anyone is inspired by this, feel free to take it for a spin and @ me when you do!! I'd love to see it.

thanks again Gabby!!

#animaniacs #yakko wakko and dot #yax

[thelocalmuffin]

Hey everyone, as you know, I have Gnosia brainrot, so if you aren't really interested in hearing my thoughts on it, I put a readmore on this post. This is not spoiler free, unfortunately, but I will try to avoid as much as I can but I do recommend giving it a chance. It's twenty five dollars and has an extremely high replay value.

Overall thoughts:

Gnosia is a visual novel/strategy game that relies on tact, deduction skills, and stealth. It tells the engaging story of a crew being infected with Gnosia after a mission goes horribly wrong. Gnosia is a parasite that wants to destroy the crew. You are one of these crew members, trying to help your comrade, Setsu as you end up solving the mysteries of the Gnosia together. To do that, you must become close with the crew, but at the same time, be wary. They may be your enemy.

This is honestly one of the best games I've ever played. It's all I ever wanted in a game and that's not even an exaggeration. There is a lot of heart and love for each element of the game, and it shows. This isn't just some triple A title, but a rare treat that many will enjoy, if given the chance. Fans of visual novels will like the story and art, people who like strategy games will like the deductive skills they need to use since this game will not hold your hand.

Gameplay

Excellent, engaging gameplay that keeps you on your toes, regardless its repetitive ways.

There's a leveling up system to help with your skills and though the game is trickier at first, as most games are, you will soon find out when your crewmates are acting far too out of character, you can start catching lies, and point out contradictions. Though, to my personal delight, unlike most visual novels, that's not enough. You need to build up your charisma and pair up with the right people to win, regardless of which side you've been assigned. As I mentioned, this game will not hold your hand. It does not question your intelligence, though, and you will feel satisfied when your crewmates actually start to take your side.

Unfortunately, if you do struggle with repetition, I do suggest to take the game slow so you don't get burn out. There are loops that will sometimes take forever for a story plot to be addressed, but if you talk to others, you will learn little tidbits about them and there are some loops that are just a regular game without any new information. Don't get too discouraged, it will pick up its pace if you give it a bit of time. 

Writing

This is what I'm going to gush most about. Writing is sturdy and fulfilling. and I honestly recommend anyone writing a timeloop/paradox story to take some notes from this story because it does it correctly.

You will not feel unsatisfied when you finish the game. Every question is answered and there is next to no contradictions in the plot, which is almost unheard in this genre. You get the answers you seek, but enough to make you have questions that aren't necessary to have answered, but would like just a morsel more of details on. I only played once before making this review, so there's a possibility that these small details are addressed.

For those who like darker visual novels, you will enjoy the plots they explore but not feel like they push the limits just to see what they can get away with, like Danganrompa is so guilty of. Murder, backstabbing, and little girls being creepy is all part of the package, but it doesn't feel like it's out of place.

Though, there was something that really surprised me they explored, especially with the game's official T rating. They do explore sexual assault/sexual themes. I know the rating says suggestive themes, but honestly, I think they should have gone with a sexual themes warning instead and slapped an M rating. I'm trying to not get into too many spoilers in this, but let's just say some characters are motivated by sex and lust. Hell, I'd argue it's an important plot point that isn't unwelcomed. I just think an accurate ESRB rating would have been appreciated especially to those trigged by that content. 

I do love the writing, but I do need to bring up a glaring flaw. Some of the characters do fall flat. I really felt like a few characters were barely explored, like Gina and Chipie, and honestly, it's a shame. There was something there, I could tell, but they just didn't add enough with them. For as long as the game is, they really could have fleshed out all of fifteen characters equally. Keep in mind I have only played one run, so perhaps I haven't spent enough time with them, but I did beat the game, so I was expecting a bit more.

I do wish they explored the characters a bit more and added a few more things to learn about these characters. Yes, I know this would have made the game longer than it already is, but it would have helped with some of the repetition issues and made them more whole.

About the romance scenes I keep seeing critique on: the only canon option is Setsu that's confirmed and honestly...it's a bit of a shame. I do like Setsu a lot and ended up accepting their confession, but I wonder what would have happened if they allowed other romanceable options? 

With that being said...I think they did most of it correctly by not adding in love interests. It would have detracted from the suspense of Gnosia, and I'm not going to lie...Remnan got me a few times when he was Gnosia because I did think there was a possibility of a romance. (Yes, you are allowed to call me out on that.)

I'm going to go off on my favorite part of the game's writing: there is no worship the protagonist trope. You know how delightful that is in a world where other games have characters exist to pander to the protagonist and the player's very existence? No? Well, I’m going to tell you why.

Characters react to you as one of their own: not a sore thumb that needs to be worshipped (i.e like Fire Emblem does), but rather, you are one of them and you are as suspicious as anyone else on board. Sure, characters like Setsu will give you natural praise, but that's because you are their friend and that is what close friends do.

With that being said, there's great representation with Raqio and Setsu, and they/them pronouns are used accurately and not in a demeaning way. With that...they do screw up a bit with Raqio. It's not perfect, and it's a bit of a shame, because they were so close to getting that down. With that being said, it's the best I've seen in media in a really long time.

Soundtrack

I will admit that the soundtrack was the weakest part of the game to me. It's not bad by any stretch of the means, but I think a few more songs would have really helped bring more mood into it and help the repetition issues. It does feel a bit out of place, and honestly, part of me wonders if that was the point? I am a huge fan of video game soundtracks, so I will admit, I was a bit bummed, though it's not bad enough to where it's a deal breaker. I think some will enjoy it, but I did start playing with the volume down about half way through.

Style

I have to talk about this since it does apply to the writing. I have one word to describe the artwork. Breathtaking. It looks so perfect for the setting. It's a bit surreal, but it's perfect for the story it is trying to tell. It's got gorgeous backgrounds. Not to mention the designs for each character. The designs for each character have sci-fi tropes that many will love but with enough uniqueness to stand out. Style and substance work hand in hand in this game and that is a rarity for me.

Overall thoughts

Overall rating 9.8/10, mainly because the soundtrack does take away from the scene for a bit. Variety in music would have really helped it be that much more engrossing. This is what visual novels should be, and honestly, sci-fi writers should take some notes, too. It's a timeless game that has immersive gameplay, a legendary story that doesn't hold back, and for a game about paradoxes and timeloops, it feels complete. With the very small flaws it has that I pointed out, I think it will appeal to the right audience and I encourage everyone to play it. It's twenty five dollars on the switch, and I hope it it gets a PC release because it would do really well on there.

Any thoughts of your own I didn't mention? Just want to go off on the game with me? Let's talk! Thanks for reading, much love, and see you all soon.

#gnosia #gnosia review #muffin reviews #muffin writes

[popwasabi]

How some stoners named “Harold & Kumar” made Asian Americans proud

Being Asian American can make you feel invisible at times or worst, the butt of every bad joke.

Sure, lots of Americans love Asian things like sushi, kung fu, anime, and tacky calligraphy tattoos that don’t mean what they say they mean but they don’t particularly care about having the people themselves present or even represented.

And typically when we are represented it tends to look like this.

Or this.

Or this.

(I said what I SAID!)

Now Asian Americans are not by any stretch the most marginalized or even the least represented people in the larger American cultural diaspora, but they’re fairly consistently forgotten or grossly stereotyped in our media regardless and this has larger consequences. Representation is important because it makes a people’s presence known to the larger majority.

Our pop culture has unfortunately played a role in erasing, appropriating, and misrepresenting Asian folk. An action movie may feature a white actor with extreme martial arts skills fighting in Hong Kong but might not have a single prominent Asian voice throughout the plot and those that do are typically gross caricatures. The Cyberpunk genre loves Asian aesthetics from its Tokyo inspired neon lighting, futurist cityscape, and ramen carts abound but boy, is the populace typically dominantly white.

(I love this movie but considering how many Asian things and aesthetic choices there are in it would it have killed Denis Villeneuve to have at least ONE background Asian person??)

It’s not shocking then that 2004’s stoner comedy classic “Harold & Kumar” starts with a pair of white dudes beginning their own adventure by leaving one of the titular heroes in the dust to do their dirty work because “Asians love math” or something. Despite not being a stoner, at the time at least, I related hard to this movie and its characters as the film touched on a number of triggers I had growing up.

2004 was a formative year for me as an Asian American. For the first time ever, my history classes were touching on Asian culture with discussions on Japanese feudalism which awakened a deep sense of pride I didn’t know I had at the time. I was watching NHK samurai dramas about Miyamoto Musashi and later the Shinsengumi which led to me begin training in kendo. Anime had suddenly become more mainstream with the premiere of Shonen Jump and pirated subtitled anime littering all of YouTube. But more importantly, and distressingly, I became more aware of my identity because it was increasingly getting called out as I was getting older.

I’ve been labeled a number of different pejoratives growing up through my teens.

“Nerd.”

“Weirdo.”

“Loser”

But none cut deeper than “Chinese boy.”

I’m not Chinese, of course, in fact I’m half white and half Japanese but try telling the various ignorant lunkheads I knew growing up to respect and differentiate between them all. Hell, better yet tell them I’m just as American as they are too.

Being labeled “Chinese” hit a very personal chord with me. To lots of Americans, unfortunately, we’re all “Chinese” and the various qualities that make each of our cultures unique are inconsequential to them. We AAPI’s all individually take a measure of pride in those unique qualities and to have it all sequestered under a blanket “Chinese” label was beyond insulting.

(And I don’t care what you tell me or how much you hate China’s government, this is a THOUSAND percent a dog whistle.)

For Asian Americans, there have been various ways one reacts to these insults. Some of course, who learned confidence at a younger age, would shrug it off or ignore it, some would outright resent it but for me at least it only made me dig my heels in deeper. Yeah, I’m Asian, so fuck you!

That energy is deep “Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle” as these two Asian American characters not only navigate a crazy night of searching for an open White Castle to satisfy their stoner cravings but also confront various microaggressions from outside and within the Asian community.

Harold, of course, struggles with his confidence. He can’t stand up for himself when the aforementioned two white bros from the start of the film saddle him with extra work. He laments doing the typical Asian thing of being too passive when confronted by authority. He can’t find the will to ask the girl next door out because again he sees himself as an impotent Asian guy unwilling to make the first move. The whole movie he struggles with his inner feelings because he’s been taught and programmed to a certain extent to be timid because that’s the Asian identity.

Meanwhile, Kumar’s character is about resisting conformity to those same stereotypes but in the worst ways. He co-opts black and hip-hop culture as seen in his messy apartment room. He fights his dad who is forcing him to take his doctor's exam, something he doesn’t want. Generational pressure is common in all cultures but it’s an entirely different animal when it comes to the Asian upbringing. Kumar embodies this resist from beginning to the end of the film and though he does decide to take the test, it’s important that he chooses to do it, not his dad, and certainly not because he’s Indian. He decides that choosing to be a great doctor doesn’t mean he is becoming a stereotype because his identity is not just about being Asian.

(Every Asian kid has heard their parent make an unintentional innuendo.)

Harold and Kumar’s differing approaches create a charming pair for the film to bounce off as Kumar’s brashness often lands them in trouble and Harold’s timid demure keeps them down in its own way and the two finally come together when Kumar learns to understand the difference between conformity and choice and Harold learns conformity doesn’t define him.

Both characters confront all kinds of microaggressions against their identity throughout the film. Cops making fun of their names. The extreme sports bros making every racist joke every Asian kid has every heard growing up at them. All Asian Americans have grown up wanting to deliver the perfect comeback or “fuck you” moment against these types of people and when our heroes triumph and put them all in their place there is undeniable catharsis as it happens for everyone who has seen this movie.

(Seriously, there isn’t a more satisfying good triumphing over evil moment in film for me than the conclusion of this particular plot.)

The movie confronts stereotypes in more ways than one though. Throughout the movie Harold and Kumar are confronted by a situation that makes them think it’ll go one direction but ends up (usually comedically) the opposite. Harold and Kumar try to hook up with two beautiful transfer students who turn out to have horrible bowel issues. Harold is reluctant to go to the Asian American club party because even he believes in his own ethnic stereotypes of them but it turns out it’s a banger of a party with plenty of weed to boot. Harold and Kumar are picked up by a lonesome, disfigured tow truck driver and are shocked to find he’s married to a beautiful woman. And the aforementioned extreme sports bros turn out to love cheesy pop music and romantic songs.

Basically, the whole movie is about giving a big middle finger to all our preconceived notions we have about identity and it's brilliant.

(Nothing wrong with cheesy pop music, of course.)

“Harold & Kumar” is great for other reasons too. John Cho and Kal Penn still play greatly off each other. There’s plenty of great one-liners sprinkled between each scene. The entire journey to find White Castle burgers in the middle of the night is a fairly genius premise for a stoner comedy still. And Neil Patrick Harris playing “himself” is still iconic.

Parts of the movie haven’t aged, well of course. There’s some bad gross-out humor, some lazy gay panic jokes and not to mention some sexist quips that don’t land well in 2020. Also, let’s just not talk about the sequels.

(I still find this scene amusing though.)

That said, “Harold & Kumar’s” first film in this munchie saga is not only a grade-A stoner flick but simply one of the best films ever when it comes to bringing that much needed representation of the time to Asian Americans. Watching Harold & Kumar stick it to their annoying white antagonists while delivering a “fuck you” to every racist joke I ever heard growing up is still cathartic as hell and made me feel proud to be Asian American during a turbulent time for myself growing up.

Though it’s not Masterpiece Theater by any stretch, Harold & Kumar will always hold a special place in my heart and remains forever “high” on my list of favorite movies of all-time.

Happy 4/20, y’all!

#harold and kumar #Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle #John Cho #Kal Penn #Asian American creative voices #asian american #aapi #Pacific Islander #4/20 #420 #weed #marijuana #getting high #movie #films #stoner #stoner films #big lebowski #Indian american #Japan #Korean American #Chinese #China #Asia #munchies #White Castle #Burgers #cheeseburgers #cyberpunk #Ghost in the Shell

[kingofthewilderwest]

Hey.. thanks for your long VLD S8 positivity post. Seriously. It's one of the only positive posts out there that share my feelings about the final season, and its helped me with accepting the end of Voltron. It honestly means a lot that you put it all out there because I feel like we all need to take a step back and stop thinking about ships this and writing that and fully appreciate the amazing reboot that we've been blessed with. Best of wishes to you and your love for this amazing show :)

Oh my goodness, thank you so much for hopping in with this message! It means a lot to me to wake up in the morning to an ask like this in my inbox. Sending best wishes to you as well, fellow VLD lover!

I’m really happy to bond with other VLD fans who enjoyed the season. I want to keep finding all the people out there who enjoyed it so we can talk about what we enjoyed together. While there’s lots of salt out there on my dash right now, I also know many friends, irl and url, who’ve liked the season. There are fans who share in this love of the full series; we are not alone; we can create a more positive and energetic climate for S8. I think that what we do is take things into our own volition rather than sitting in others’ salt! :D 

We have the ability and the agency to write our own posts that are positive-focused. We can all sit down and write these positivity posts together!

You’re right - this is an amazing reboot that we have been blessed with. An absolutely amazing reboot.

The first thing I notice… is that people go into each new season with a specific preconception of what they want. If you become so attached to this prediction of yours, then you set yourself up for disappointment. The creators can’t read your mind and they aren’t your mind. The story will often go differently than what you expected. That’s simply the nature of being an audience member. But if you formulate in your mind that this prediction you made is “what you want,” then you’re going to be upset when what you artificially set your hopes and dreams upon doesn’t get fulfilled. It can take some training to teach yourself not to go into something with such preconceptions, but to take and enjoy what you do get… but I think that learning it makes you a lot happier with anything and everything you watch. If you go in with a simple desire to have fun and find positives (rather than expect perfection or specific end game ships or story elements), then you’re going in with an attitude that will be positively reaffirmed with the adventure you watch.

The second thing I notice… is that people can be quick to presume rather than waiting out the long end game. To give one example: S7 met with backlash because people called it queerbaiting and killing off the gays. Zethrid and Ezor were presumed to have died; I saw people lash out at killing the Galra space lesbians and Adam. But Zethrid and Ezor were going to end up happy and alive. People presumed rather than waiting for following seasons to explain what the story intended. Neither Zethrid nor Ezor nor (most importantly, really) Takashi Shirogane had died; Shiro is the queer representative role model and he’s the man who seems impossible to actually kill. The fact that he’s gay but doesn’t have a story focused in him finding a romance isn’t queerbaiting. The fact that Shiro and Keith are close but don’t end up together isn’t queerbaiting, either; there was nothing in their interactions that was specifically, explicitly romantic throughout the entire series (reminder: I’m queer and a Sheith shipper ^.^ ). Unfortunately, because lots of people presumed they knew what the story said rather than acknowledging that the story still had more to develop… they got angry over things that would be addressed and developed again in later seasons.

And you’re right that shipping is something that people can get caught up in and emotional about in particular. I’ve been watching lots of analyses blogs through the seasons (up to the premiering of S8) post discussions on what their predicted end game pairs were. They were all so confident they were right… and all these analyses were predicting different pairs. Plance, Klance, Kallura, Allurance, Sheith… I couldn’t help but sit there thinking that lots of these analysts were so gungho on their theories that they were setting themselves up for disappointment.

I’ve seen people adamantly, angrily post things like, “They didn’t make it canon, but I’m still shipping [X].” I think that’s a little bit of a skewed perspective of what shipping is. Shipping isn’t about trying to WILL it into canon. Shipping isn’t about accepting only canon relationships. Shipping is about enjoying two characters’ interactions and imagining it as romantic, regardless of whether or not it becomes canon in the story itself. Shipping is a recreational activity in fandom meant to celebrate how two (or more) characters bond or could conceivably bond. If a ship becomes canonical, that’s icing on the cake - a bonus, not an essential thing that the story “demands.” The writers have their own directions, and just because they write a different romantic pairing than what you enjoy imagining doesn’t mean that they’ve written a bad story. I don’t think we should ever be so caught up in our imaginations and ships that we get angry if the writers don’t align with what’s inside our heads. And there’s no WAY for writers to read our minds and write what’s inside our heads - and we all have different heads with different ships we like, to boot.

Canon romantic developments might not be the relationship you prefer, but I don’t think it’s healthy for anyone to get so caught up in believing their romance must be The One that they can’t enjoy a story when it doesn’t go their preconceived way.

As far as writing elements as a whole are considered… I could write an extremely lengthy constructively critical essay over areas in VLD I think could have been improved narratively. I could. I’m someone who adores narrative structure in story so it’s something I pick up on when I watch anything. S8 is a season that I think has a lot of imperfect writing points. I can see why some people are unhappy about certain things. But I can both acknowledge something as imperfect and not focus on those imperfections - both when I watch something, and after I’ve viewed it. It makes life more fun to focus on the things you liked rather than the things you didn’t.

I like your attitude - find the things to love. There may be things that disappoint us, or writing elements that aren’t anywhere near perfect, but that’s okay, and that doesn’t make a story horrible or worthless or awful or unenjoyable. We can go in to watching something to have fun rather than to expect perfection. 

Of course it’s okay if we end up not liking something, and of course it’s okay to not like something because of bad narrative structures or something. It’s okay to not like something for ANY reason - we all have different tastes and that’s okay. No one should be forced to like something. We’re all different humans with different preferences. It also makes sense to call out certain things if writers really drop the ball on important things. 

But I also think it’s good to internally acknowledge when something is legitimately *BAD* or offensive… versus when it’s simply not perfect or not your personal taste, and I’d say VLD falls into the latter whenever there’s a constructively critical element to be had. And again, it’s not a bad ability to be had of being able to recognize things that weren’t your cup of tea, but also look to the things they were!

I hope this doesn’t come off as pedantic or holier-than-thou or anything like that because that’s not what I’m thinking here! I hope the full complexity of my thoughts comes out rather than sounding like I’m condemning, because I’m really not meaning to. I’m just concerned when I see people going into a show with such an unyielding set of preconceived notions for how they want plot, romance, etc. to go… which sets themselves up for maybe avoidable disappointment and outrage. But anywayyyy. Let’s not focus on that. XD

If anyone has more fun VLD S8 things they want to share, toss me asks! Let’s get convos going about about all the awesome things of this season! I’m here to keep the convo going about all the bright things, and I’d rather talk about that! XD

#blabbing Haddock #vld #vld fandom #Voltron: Legendary Defender #Voltron Legendary Defender #non-dragons #Voltron #ask #ask me #awesome anonymous friend #Anonymous

[storiescanberewritten]

In Remembrance by Guy Adams

Ahhhh poor, unloved Class. I recently heard someone say, "Doctor Who is for kids, Torchwood is for adults, Class is for nobody." It always seemed that Class came about at completely the wrong time, just towards the end of the Steven Moffat era of Doctor Who when big changes for the franchise as a whole were on the way, both in front of and behind the camera. On top of this, the series was announced as a BBC Three exclusive in October 2015 and almost immediately afterwards in November it was announced that BBC Three would be relaunched as an online only channel. By the time Class was launched in October 2016 it was done relatively quietly online rather than being a big blockbuster event worthy of a Doctor Who spin off. Probably seen as the trailblazer of a new era for BBC Three, the series then failed to make the top 20 viewed programmes on the iPlayer at any time in its first seven weeks. The ratings when repeated on BBC One in horribly late night double bills were even worse. That can only be classed as a failed experiment (ho ho).

Regardless of any of this Class was always a strange concept, taking the iconic Doctor Who location of Coal Hill School/Academy and making it the centre of an ongoing Buffy style series featuring monsters, aliens and teen drama. I feel I enjoyed Class more than many others did, although it certainly had its problems (the over-arching Shadowkin storyline being mostly uninteresting was one of them) but the characters really grew on me over the series with the strength of each of the actors really shining through. Unfortunately Class was cancelled after the muted response from its potential audience, but as ever Big Finish audios are here to resurrect any tiny corner of the Doctor Who franchise that they possibly can. And we love them for it. Released last month, the two boxsets each feature three 45 - 60 minute stories set within the first series of Class.

As a whole the boxsets are really strong, avoiding anything but tiny references to the Shadowkin and instead telling more constrained, character driven stories that the actors can really get stuck into. What we are concerned with here on Stories Can Be Rewritten though is the final story of Volume Two, In Remembrance, a sequel of sorts to the hugely popular Seventh Doctor story from 1988, Remembrance of the Daleks by Ben Aaronovitch (Ben will be popping up on this blog again very soon!) This audio adventure brings Ace (Sophie Aldred) and the Daleks (Nicholas Briggs) into the present day world of Class, with Ace encountering both Charlie (Greg Austin) and Miss Quill (Katherine Kelly) as she wanders into Coal Hill Academy one night to exterminate a lone Dalek. Big Finish do seem to specialise in crossing over different eras of Doctor Who with each other, often with varying levels of success. Thankfully In Remembrance is one of the more satisfying examples of the trend.

Without going into too much detail of the plot of Remembrance of the Daleks, that story is set in 1963 around and about Coal Hill School and focuses on a civil war between two different factions of Dalek. In Remembrance sees one of these Daleks do a temporal shift into the future to find out how this all pans out and learn anything that might help its unit of Daleks be victorious. For the purposes of this story it is claimed that upon beating the Daleks in 1963, the Doctor and Ace picked up signals warning them of the time travelling Dalek and meant to check it out but got distracted by another adventure. Ace, having left the Doctor, spent time on Gallifrey, and now returned to Earth, remembers the Dalek is about to show up in 2016 and goes to investigate. Charlie manages to get caught up in the tear in time and sends himself back to 1963, leaving the brilliant combination of Ace and Quill to exchange hugely entertaining barbs at each other whilst trying to defeat the Dalek trapped in the school.

The set-up is fairly convoluted then, and relies on retcons to Remembrance of the Daleks and the ability of Ace to be in the right place at the right time in 2016, despite spending most of the last few years on an alien planet. It is absolutely worth it to get Ace and Quill together though because their world views are completely at odds with each other and they immediately start to wind one another up. The constant cynicism of Quill versus the open minded, fun loving Ace is a great match and there's joy for the audience as it dawns on Quill that Ace knows the Doctor, whom she states is "a pain, and not be relied on" and storms away. "Yep, she knows him", malignes Ace with a knowing tone. Sophie Aldred is on top form, even briefly managing to do a convincing impression of herself 30 years ago as she puts on a higher, chirpy voice in a small cameo of young Ace meeting Charlie in 1963. Charlie really does draw the short straw here, getting stuck alone in the past with nothing much to do except run away from Daleks and talk to himself. It's a bit of a waste of Greg Austin's talents to tell the truth, as he really shows his worth in Volume One's Tell Me You Love Me.

The only thing I can really pick on here is the trope of the over-talkative, slightly comic Dalek that seems to come up every so often. The Daleks really are more effective as an unstoppable destructive force. When they stop to have chats things can sometimes go awry. Admittedly, you often need to do this kind of thing to build up a story and stop all Dalek episodes just being exactly the same (as much as that is possible) but sometimes it works better than others. Here Quill ends up trying to repair the Dalek so that it can take her back to 1963 to rescue Charlie, but accidentally harms it in the process. "Arrrrgh! Be more careful!", the Dalek exclaims. Excruciating for me as well as the Dalek. Quill then goes on to mock the Dalek repeatedly which is fine and quite funny, but does mean the Dalek has to rise to her and acknowledge the silly things she is saying about it. Again, this kind of thing should really be above the Daleks, although there is a history there of Daleks being slapstick - a Dalek feeling all sorry for itself and deciding to self destruct because it loses it's captive in Death to the Daleks for example, or the Dalek emerging from underneath a sand dune at the end of episode one of The Chase, coughing and wheezing as it does so!! There's probably room in Doctor Who media for all forms of Dalek to be fair, but there were a couple of moments here were the Dalek seemed a bit too pathetic for my tastes. Having said that, there's also some interesting interplay between Quill and the Dalek, giving us a glimpse at how the Daleks think of themselves other than just the usual "we are the supreme beings!"

Overall the story is a really nice tribute to Remembrance and the 1963 scenes even have some excellent incidental music which sounds very similar to that used in the TV story. The sound effects of the Dalek guns and the exterminations are also those that were used in the late 80s, so it does a great job of putting you back in the mindset of the Seventh Doctor Era, with new twists and wrinkles added of course. With the 30th anniversary of Remembrance of the Daleks coming up in October of this year, it's very satisfying to have this little throwback to my favourite Doctor Who story. Here's hoping the Class crew can return again on audio in the future, maybe even exploring that Weeping Angels plot that was so cruelly teased at the end of Series One. And, with a bit of luck, Ace can join them in the battle too!

#ace #sophie aldred #class #big finish #greg austin #katherine kelly #quill #charlie #guy adams #ben aaronovitch #daleks #dalek #doctor who #dr who #the doctor

[oosteven-universe]

Black Beacon #3

Black Beacon #3 Heavy Metal Comics 2021 Written by Ryan K. Lindsay Illustrated by Sebastian Piriz Lettered by Jame    Niko finally gets some answers about the Sphere as she travels inside it to meet the army of robots that clean and tend to its maintenance. Unfortunately, this means she must also give up answers, and having her sole friend see how horribly beats the heart of man is a tough reveal. Thankfully all introspection will meet action as the Xed show their hand in the dirty war they wage.    As Niko learns more about this world we learn right alongside her.  Only not everything she learns is what she wants to hear and it seems that these alien species have easily figured out just how volatile and warlike humans are or can be.  It is funny, but not really, how easy it is to understand the majority of human nature, I say majority because not everyone is the same.  I love the opening here with the Fifth Dimensional Sentient Machine and how we see the interchange between the two.  I think that this does a magnificent job in setting the stage for what we are going to be seeing throughout this issue and those that follow.      I’m a huge fan of the way that this is being told.  The story & plot development that we see through the narration, the description paes, the dialogue, the character interaction as well as how we see them act and react to the situations and circumstances which they encounter does a magnificent job in bringing their personalities to the forefront.  The pacing is excellent and as it takes us through the pages revealing more and more of the story the more we want to see and learn.  There are many species that we see and many plates where they inhabit that we want to see more of and we only get glimpses of them and that’s enough to wet the appetite.    I’m really impressed with how we see this being structured and how we see the layers within the story continue to emerge, grow, evolve and strengthen.  These layers we see open up new avenues to be explored and whether they are explored or not they all add this great depth, dimension and complexity to the story.  Niko’s adventures, including her trying to see her ship, lead to a whole lot of interesting moments.  How we see everything working together to create the story’s ebb & flow as well as how we see it move the story forward is immaculately rendered.    The interiors here are fabulous.  How we see the linework and its varying weights and techniques being utilised to create the detail within the work is sensationally rendered.  We see some nice backgrounds being utilised but there could always be more to really enhance and expand the moments.  How we see the composition within the panels to bring out the depth perception, sense of scale and the overall sense of size and scope to the story is incredibly well rendered.  The utilisation of the page layouts, which is utterly fabulous, and how we see the angles and perspective in the panels show a remarkable eye for storytelling.  The various hues and tones within the colours being utilised to create the shading, highlights and shadow work shows a great eye for how colour works.  How we see things being applied, gradation and blocking, is incredibly well rendered and it really makes some moments pop. ​    I still can’t tell if Niko is male or female and we know she had a female lover so this starts to make more sense to me.  That she’s the one who arrives first in essence to pave the way for the rest of the humans who are supposed to come should prove to be interesting in its own right and if they do arrive they shouldn’t or won’t be welcomed with open arms though she does have her own plate where humans could now settle.  Not that humans are content to stay where they are designated.  Regardless this engages the reader beautifully and if my rambling doesn’t show this then I don’t know what will.  The writing is smart and interesting while the characterisation is intelligent and fascinating and these interiors really do a magnificent job in bringing the whole thing to life.

#Comic Books #Comics Reviews #Heavy Metal Comics

[blame-canada]

On-Call Sinner, Full-Time Lover - Creek

The plot twist that was falling in love with the imp that stole him away from eternal damnation was something Craig couldn't say he would've ever expected out of life, but here he was, deep in the throes of twitterpated existence with an otherworldly creature that made his heart pound. Damning souls together paid the bills alright, but being on-call sucks regardless of your occupation- unless your assignment happens to be an old 'friend.'

Hello friends and welcome to the Tweekquel you’ve all been waiting for (or it was probably just me, really) to Tempt A Demon, Pay The Price! These two are just too fun to write. Read it on AO3 here. On with the show!

Waking up always felt a bit odd now, Craig had noticed. Sleep didn’t quite feel the same, and he wondered if perhaps the pillows were too flat, or the black-out canopy too stifling. It was probably the fire though. Everything was always a little on fire.

Everything was so on fire, in fact, that when he blinked awake slowly to the sound of noisily flapping wings, he looked down at his feet to find the edge of his sheets ablaze. He stomped at it lazily and it fizzled out, and the sheets regenerated to their normal, pristine condition. It was kind of really great to live in a magical Hell apartment. Well, besides all the fire.

“Babe,” Craig croaked, taking his time cracking his eyes open fully and squirming around in their king-sized bed while he stretched. “Babe, why are you up?” The canopy did a pretty good job of blocking out the flames and their light, but he could still see the shadow of his lover flitting about the room haphazardly. The shadow grew in size until a head of wild hair with pretty little horns popped in between the opening of the canopy to greet him, wide eyes and all.

“We’re on-call today, remember?” He shivered a bit, and Craig slow-blinked at him.

“Yeah, but we never actually get called. Come back to bed, honey, come on,” he begged lazily, reaching his hand out to scratch under his chin, and Tweek, the darling little thing, began to make the little rumbling sound that echoed from his throat like a cat’s purr. Nevermind the distant screeching of the damned souls that wavered beneath it. He relaxed into his scratches for a few seconds before coming to his senses, and he swatted Craig’s hand away.

“Y-you know that’s my weakness! That’s mean!” Tweek whined, and Craig groaned as his shifting about let more of the fire-light into his dark safe haven. “You come on. You know if you don’t take this job seriously, Satan will be seriously pissed off!”

“I know but Tweek,” Craig yawned again and Tweek looked marginally more mad, “we never get calls. Just come back to bed and we can turn the alarm up.”

“Well, if you’re sure…” Tweek trailed off, and Craig could see his tail swinging behind him nervously, the spade tip twitching along with his usual tics.

“I’m the surest sure. C’mere.” He grappled at nothing in the air lazily, and Tweek giggled at him, his pointy teeth poking through his smile. He folded and tucked his wings, making them small for convenience’s sake with his fancy dark magicks, and crawled in to meet him. Craig ruffled his hair and kissed the crook of his neck.

Perhaps he should explain.

If the memory of the beginning of their passionate but sweet relationship escapes you, it’s likely you either read the tale too long ago, or never did in the first place. Here is a convenient link, so that Craig won’t feel the need to start at the very beginning. That would be annoying when the chronicle is right there, for your ease of access.

Anyway.

Immediately after having been teleported away from his false church through the infinite wormholes of Hell, Tweek had begun his training on how to keep a human being. Namely, learning that they frequently needed food and water, different from the usual sustenance he needed every few days that dripped menacingly from Hell’s stalactites. He found it annoying how much Craig needed to consume to stay alive, and though he’d tried to skimp out for convenience’s sake before, Craig was very good at being annoying about being hungry. He had begun to regret deserting for him.

Then of course, they began their very important and serious studies of Sodom and Gomorrah, and as they hopped from town to town to avoid the eye of Satan that wished to punish Tweek, they became very well-learned scholars. So well-learned, in fact, that their expertise were something to be quite proud of, and Tweek would never regret deserting Hell for him ever again. It had taken Craig a minute to get used to the, well, fur, and all, but the wings and horns and pointy teeth kind of made up for it. It wasn’t like he wasn’t already going to Hell or anything.

Fast-forward to when Satan did finally get ahold of them, and while Tweek groveled, Craig hung back, hiding behind his splayed, fearful wings. Tweek began to cry, his twitching and shivering increasingly distracting and difficult to speak through, and Craig watched Satan’s eyes grow soft as Tweek told their story. Lucky for them, Satan was a sensitive man and a sucker for young gay love stories, and they’d been granted their own Hell-apartment as long as they continued to collect souls of the damned. The rest was Sodom and Gomorrah-flavored history, and now they lied together in their luxurious canopy bed, on their day off but on-call, and it felt startlingly comparable to a regular life on Earth. Craig didn’t miss home much.

The warmth of Tweek’s unnaturally high body temperature easily lulled Craig into the beginnings of a light sleep, and he could feel Tweek’s body relax as it began to rest as well. He sighed lightly and wrapped an arm around Tweek’s middle, his head curled into his bare chest, and let his body sink into the incredible plush softness of their mattress.

Then the alarm went off.

Tweek had certainly turned up the volume, and from just outside the canopy blared something straight out of a shitty Halloween soundscapes CD. Seriously, Craig was pretty sure that was what it was. Tweek groaned from beside him and crawled out of their bed to slap the off button just as a fake wolf howl began its crescendo, and the little scroll that appeared out of thin air with their assignment arrived in a puff of black smoke under his clawed hand. He yawned loudly, the action appearing not unlike a cat, and rubbed his eyes awake. Craig did the same as he fumbled to get out from under the sheets and face the noise of their unfortunate paging.

“We never get calls,” Tweek mimicked, clearly irritated with Craig, as he collected the essentials. Craig rolled his eyes while he pulled on real pants.

“What do we have to do?”

“It says it’s another routine damnation, s-so it should be quick,” Tweek muttered, his speech impaired by the hair pin sticking out of his mouth. He pulled it out and stabbed it into his hair right around his left horn, disguised in its placement but effectively forming another sharp spike in his hair. Craig made fun of him for weeks for bothering to style his hair like that.

Craig yawned one more time as he buttoned up his black dress shirt, shifting the collar and shoulders forward and tucking it into his pants. It was annoying that he had to wait until they were at the surface to put on his collar, but it completed the aesthetic, and Craig cared about the aesthetic. He quite liked the routine he and Tweek had invented for their work.

“Ready?” Tweek asked, blinking over at him while he finished smudging some eyeliner under his eyes, and Craig nodded at him once.

“Ready. Fuck it up, babe.”

Tweek snorted, and with a wave of his hand, a portal appeared and screeched at them from their feet. They clasped hands, and together they stepped through, the whooshing sound of their descent whipping past Craig’s ears along with the screams of the damned. “I’m so glad we upgraded to the sound-proof fire,” Craig said, conversationally, and Tweek hummed his agreement. “I’m sick of all the goddamn screaming.”

“Yeah well, t-try thousands of years of it,” Tweek said, and then they were just below the surface, and Tweek got to work on his demolition.

This was probably the hottest part of the ritual. It was a bit archaic that they still had to claw through the ground to get out in the first place, but it also meant Craig got to watch Tweek’s back muscles and arms work their enhanced strength and magic to make a terrifying entrance. He still remembered the horrible cracks in the earth Tweek had made when he came to collect him, and he nearly sighed aloud at the fondness of their first moments together, so full of fear and also thinly repressed sexual attraction. God, he loved him.

The first sight of the Earth’s surface greeted them and it was night time, as was typical, and Tweek glanced back at Craig with a smirk before dramatically plunging his hand into the floorboards of their entrance portal. He took another quick look at his assignment scroll, suddenly hovering in his hand, and then hoisted himself into the land of the living. The high-pitched squeal from above was so satisfying.

Tweek let out a terrifying growl as Craig clambered out behind him, hiding behind his gigantic wings spread wide across what looked like a church. He would make his own entrance once he got his bearings and finished placing his collar. The pews were shoved back and crooked and at least one stained-glass window had blown out from the force. Craig tsked in his head at how cheap it all looked, like the church equivalent of a secondhand shop, but then he caught one of the programs tucked in a little caddy glued on the side of one of the pews.

Wait.

He snatched the scroll from Tweek’s side, exhilaration filling his chest, and then exploding when he finally read the name. He didn’t bother to make a super dramatic entrance, too high on the incredible irony of it all. He laughed, loud and unrestrained, and gently pushed his way forward to step in front of his darling imp.

“Oh my god. No way. No fuckin’ way.” He continued to chuckle as he ran a hand through his hair, the confidence of his position of power running through him like a poison. Sweet, sweet poison.

“W-what the fuh- Craig?!” their victim shrieked, and Craig laughed louder, practically giddy with the pleasure of what he was about to do. “We thought you fucking died!”

“Oh, I think you’ll find me very much alive,” Craig said, lowering his gaze so that he knew the fire surrounding him would reflect in them, forever an experienced showman even on the other side. He stepped forward, the clacking of his shoes reverberating through the room over the distant screams and hissing Tweek was adding to the background, for the atmosphere. A lovely touch, really. “What are the goddamn odds though, right?” He pulled out the scroll and his thick framed reading glasses, and read from it slowly.

“Imp Tweek, Fear Incarnate, Manifest 48: you are hereby summoned per your duties as on-call board-certified Damnation Technician to elicit justice upon the following sinner, predetermined to be damned to Hell under circumstances unnatural and premature: Mr. Eric Theodore Cartman, false prophet and solicitor of unmarked, unrecognized religion invented for-profit at the expense of compromised souls other than one’s own. This violates the code of conduct produced for directors of houses of worship, and sentences you to eternal damnation to Hell for your crimes against humanity.” He let the scroll snap shut and Cartman made a delicious flinch. “Do you have objections to this ruling?”

Cartman gawked, stuttering on a consonant and blinking wildly as his eyes darted all over the imp who shadowed him like a nightmarish silhouette. Tweek’s growling rose in volume and Craig smirked, hushing him with a harshly uttered “Heel,” a command that always pissed Tweek off later but proved effective in the moment. The more inhuman Tweek seemed, the better. Tweek, true to character, stopped with a vicious snarl, and flapped his wings once to force Cartman back in a gale force wind into the podium, much like Craig had once stood on his own failed Death Day.

“P-p-p-please, Craig, we were coworkers! Y-you must understand, we were all so worried for you, I’m seriously! Remember that one time when we, um,” he faltered, obviously unable to find a time Craig might be grateful for, his voice the high whine he reserved for when he begged his mother when they were young. Craig winced in disgust, and took off his glasses to tuck them in his breast pocket.

“Tweek,” Craig said, and that was all the command Tweek needed to leap over Craig’s head and land with a thunderous bang that broke the floor beneath him, leaving a puncture wound with the end of his pitchfork and his tail swinging wildly back and forth with excitement in Craig’s face.

“What is that thing?” Cartman asked shrilly, squeaking when Tweek took a tiny step forward in his crouched predator position.

“An imp,” Tweek and Craig corrected at the same time, and Craig swooned for him before continuing. “He's the creature sent to damn you to Hell for your sins. He’s also my lover, and we live together in an apartment in Hell.” The look on Cartman’s face made it all so worth it.

“You’re fucking kidding me. What the hell?” Cartman said, and Tweek snarled at him again, the gnashing of his teeth audible from behind him. He was probably intentionally salivating too, to get the full drooling-massive-sharp-teeth effect going to terrify him. His wings were tilted forward, a sign of aggression Craig had come to understand by observation, and with teeth bared he knew he looked like an absolute terror. It was delectable, the fear in Cartman’s eyes right now. He wished he could take a picture.

“No objections then? Okay,” Craig said with a shrug, and Tweek gripped his pitchfork tighter, pointing it at Cartman’s heart. “We hereby banish you-”

“Wait!” His eyes were wide and watery, and he finally dropped to his knees off his fat, wobbly little legs.“W-wait, Craig, buddy,” he tried, a nervous laugh in his throat, “you know I’m doing this to help them. They’re lost souls, and I’m giving them a God to believe in! What’s so wrong about that? Everyone needs a place to turn when they’re hurting, Craig, come on. You know it’s true. I’m giving them purpose!”

“All you’re doing is making them pay for some bullshit special effects and your fast food intake.” Craig yawned and blinked slowly, looking forward to crawling back in bed to nap once this was all over. “Take him away, baby.”

Tweek hummed, the sound especially supernatural above the surface, and stabbed the end of his pitchfork into the floor. From its entry point, a new crack traveled forward, splitting right between Cartman’s knees and glowing that terrifying fiery orange. It began to break in half and Cartman began to scream again, girlish and wailing, and Craig couldn’t help but laugh. “Really, the odds! Am I right?” he yelled over the screams of the damned, and Tweek took his chance to lurch forward and plunge the pointed ends of his pitchfork directly into Cartman’s chest. His screaming hitched and he coughed once, and Tweek howled blissfully into the night before using his cloven hoof to shove Cartman’s body off his murder weapon and into the crack that swallowed him whole. He flapped his wings slowly and powerfully as he watched him descend from the high ceiling, and Craig smiled, pride consuming him as the floor sealed itself shut. “Nice job, honey.”

“Thanks,” Tweek said as he dropped down to the ground, the screams having dulled to a distant thrumming so that they felt as quiet as they ever could be. “You were great”—he shuddered with a twitch—“mm, too!”

“Let’s go home,” Craig said through another big yawn, and it spread to his lover, his teeth glinting in the fire surrounding them while he stretched his mouth wide. God, it was hot. Maybe he wouldn’t go back to sleep.

Tweek smiled and took his hand, planting a kiss on his cheek, before walking him back to the hole from whence they came. “So you knew him? Do you feel bad?”

Craig scoffed. “Nah. He was an asshole. I have no reason to forgive him or care. Peru was enough bullshit for a lifetime.”

“Peru?” Tweek asked, but Craig just smiled and faced forward, and they stepped into the portal that would lead them home and back to bed where they would decidedly, most definitely, not be sleeping.

#tweek tweak #craig tucker #imp tweek #youth pastor craig #imp tweek x youth pastor craig #creek #creek sp #south park #south park phone destroyer #south park fanfiction #sp fanfiction #south park fanfic #sp fanfic #my fanfiction #my fanfic

[wolfie-dragon-rider]

Hi! 2,3 and 13 on the Meme for Fic Writers? :D

Thank you so much for asking! Questions are from here.

2) Is there a trope you’ve yet to try your hand at, but really want to?

Not really. I like my hurt/comfort angsty things I write. Though maybe there is something, but I’m not sure if there’s a name for this. But I once considered writing a silly lighthearted Modern AU Hiccstrid fic, with them being in college, and I was planning to basically have Hiccup do a Computer Science major, and then have every chapter start off with a... term or concept from CS, as it relates to his relationship woes. Such as “Complexity theory is about determining the complexity of problems. The more time or effort it takes to find a solution to a problem, the higher its complexity. Much research in CS is about finding faster algorithms for problems, and thus reducing their complexity. 

Hiccup considered the problem 'Figuring out what girls think' to have an extremely high complexity, requiring an amount of research generally rewarded with a Nobel Prize.” 

I once read a fic (unfortunately I can’t remember what it was called) which did such a thing for physics terms, and I thought it was cute and funny. Maybe one day I’ll write it.

3) Is there a trope you wouldn’t touch with a ten foot pole?

There are of course always the problematic tropes that I don’t want to get involved with, but one that is common in the HTTYD fandom that I hate, is the “Name kid after dead relative/lover/friend/pet/whatever” trope. I know, I know, sacrilege, but I just don’t like Hiccstrid naming their kid Finn or Stoick or something like that. I personally feel it’s a bit creepy. The kid is unique, a new person. It shouldn’t be a... replacement of the dead person. And I know it’s typically not meant to be, but to me that’s what it feels like. “We lost Stoick but we have a new Stoick now”. The baby is not a new Stoick, he’s a new person who is different from Stoick. 

13) What’s the best writing advice you’ve ever come across?

I think I benefited a lot from Kurt Vonnegut’s 8 rules of writing. This is probably getting a bit long, so I’ll post them all here and write down my thoughts about them below the cut:

Use the time of a total stranger in such a way that he or she will not feel the time was wasted.I tend to interpret this in two ways. One, keep it short. Don’t waste the reader’s time with endless description of things that don’t matter, sideplots that go nowhere, or strange observations. Two, be upfront with your intentions. Don’t start a story that appears to start as a fluffy coffeeshop AU but halfway through suddenly turns into some kind of Hunger Games horror dystopia. The reader who probably followed the story for fluff will feel cheated, and the horror fan has to slog through chapters of other stuff, and you’ve wasted their time. 

Give the reader at least one character he or she can root for.The worst thing a reader can feel towards your characters is not hate or disgust. It’s indifference. It’s “I don’t care what happens to any of these people, so why should I keep reading?” Make sure the audience wants the protagonist to succeed. Wants them to overcome their troubles. Make sure the audience feels like the character has not been treated right, and deserves justice.  

Every character should want something, even if it is only a glass of water.I find this incredibly good advice to keep in mind when writing side or background characters. Let’s say your characters are taking a cab. Remember that the cab driver is a person too. They have a name, and goals. They want to go home on time. They want to listen to their favorite radio channel. They want the characters to not be so loud. They want their kids to go to a school as good as the protagonist is going through. And sure, the audience doesn’t need to know their life story, far from it. But it can make your world feel so much more alive if the characters’ loud conversation is interrupted by the driver turning the volume of his music up. It allows you to show how your protagonist will react to this. Are they empathetic? Insulted? Maybe they love the music and start a conversation with the driver. Another point where this rule applies is for villains. Keep in mind that even though your villains do horrible things, they do them because they want to accomplish something. 

Every sentence must do one of two things — reveal character or advance the action.I used to have my own addendum to this rule: Worldbuilding should also be a valid use for a sentence, I thought. But slowly I realized that it’s already in the other two things. Worldbuilding is cool, but I think that ultimately it should be subservient to the plot and characters. Especially when you’re looking through the eyes of a character, every sentence you write is what the character sees. And what the see, how they see it, how they respond, that shows character. What you show and how you show it reveals more about the plot and character than the world itself. 

Start as close to the end as possible.A remarkably simple rule, yet incredibly right. When starting a story, or editing it, always ask for the first couple of chapters “Are these necessary?” Interesting stories, no matter their genre, tend to start the same way: There is a status quo that is broken. Frodo’s calm life in the Shire is interrupted by his uncle’s birthday party and the magical ring he gets after it. The Dursleys’ perfectly normal life is interrupted when a magical boy is left on their doorstep. A friend disappears. A lover is murdered. Status Quo is broken: The world is not as it should be anymore, and the protagonist has to set it right. Another way to rephrase this rule is to say: Begin at the very start of your story, then simply throw everything away until something happens that the reader has to know. Delete until you’re forced to summarize the deleted events in the rest of your story. Because if the reader didn’t need to know it, they shouldn’t have to read it. 

Be a sadist. Now matter how sweet and innocent your leading characters, make awful things happen to them — in order that the reader may see what they are made of.I love this rule. Not because I’m a sadist personally, heck, it hurts me when I write such horrible things. But because indeed, we don’t see the true strength of a character until they’re in their lowest point and they still don’t give up. Throw them over the edge of the cliff, and only then can you see them truly soar. You want your readers to wonder how in the world the character could ever overcome these hurdles. This quote from Lord of the Rings seems appropriate: It's like in the great stories Mr. Frodo. The ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger they were, and sometimes you didn't want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad happened? And then, when the reader is wondering that, you make your character soar. They get back up, keep on fighting, and your audience will cheer and yell and cry in relief. 

Write to please just one person. If you open a window and make love to the world, so to speak, your story will get pneumonia.This rule pretty much speaks for itself. There will always always always be people who don’t like what you write. Who don’t like the genre you write. Who don’t like the character you write. Screw those people. 

Give your readers as much information as possible as soon as possible. To heck with suspense. Readers should have such complete understanding of what is going on, where and why, that they could finish the story themselves, should cockroaches eat the last few pages.I should emphasize here that these are rules originally intended for short stories, but I agree with the rule in general regardless. I hate it when stories do this thing, which I call ‘the 4th wall censor’, where something important is referred to vaguely even though everybody in the room knows about it, simply because the audience doesn’t know. This is also the hallmark of a good detective or thriller story. Your twist or reveal shouldn’t depend on keeping something hidden from the audience. The signs should be there all along, in foreshadowing and offhand remarks that combine into a great picture once you realize it. Not the “Haha, turns out that the crime scene contained this vital clue that wasn’t mentioned before!”. Of course, there are circumstances where you want suspence or unreliable narration, but always ask yourself if it’s actually necessary. If the entire suspense is born from intentional miscommunication between you and the reader, then maybe the book wasn’t that clever to begin with.Probably way more than you wanted to know, but I hope you learned something! 

#asks #writing #writing is hard #tropes

[preserving-ferretbrain]

Whistle Down the Wind

by Dan H

Wednesday, 23 July 2008

Dan on The Name of the Wind, with reference to Superman, Macgyver and Roger Rabbit.~

While I was reading The Name of the Wind (which is called The Name of the Wind, and not In the Name of the Wind, despite the fact that I keep on being tempted to call it that) I stopped every thirty seven seconds to inform my girlfriend that I just didn't know what to make of it. I've finished it now, and I still don't know what to make of it.

So you should have a pretty good idea of what to expect from this review. Plus, y'know, spoilers.

A comedian, I think it was either Phil Jupitus or Bill Bailey (one of the Never Mind the Buzzcocksteam captains anyway) once observed that he had loved Captain Scarlet as a kid, but had always found himself with the same old problem. Captain Scarlet would get into trouble and he'd think "oh no, how's he going to get out of this?" Then he'd realize "oh yeah, he's indestructible." Yes, it was a joke. Yes, Phil or Bill or whoever it was, was mostly just trying to get a laugh, and yes in fact the way you deal with that sort of problem is by having Other Things at Stake but it does highlight a serious underlying problem.

The Name of the Wind is a peculiar book (which is part of why it's causing such a stir at the moment). It is primarily told in the first person, but unusually for a book with first-person narration, the narration is actually contextualized. The book begins with a simple village inn in a simple, grimy fantasy world. The text draws our attention to the barman, a man named "Kote". Although he seems no more than a simple innkeeper, we know there's more to him than that - he has red hair for a start, and under Article Five of the Fantasy Literature Act of 1972 it is illegal to have a redhead in a fantasy novel who isn't Totally Special (Ron Weasley slipped through the net due to the Sidekick Exemption Clause).

The town has the usual small-town worries: bad roads, a hard winter, attacks by demonic creatures, that sort of thing. The demonic creatures (who aren't really demons, they're creatures called "skraelings") have already jumped one villager, who escaped more by good luck than good judgment, and there's probably more coming. Simple Innkeeper Kote heads out into the woods in the dead of night and slaughters them in single combat, and this prompts a meeting with a travelling Chronicler called Chronicler, who has come to the sleepy village looking for a legendary hero called Kvothe who, surprise surprise, turns out to be one and the same as our mild mannered flame-haired barkeep.

It's here that the story switches to first-person narration, where it stays for the rest of the book. Kvothe arranges to dictate his entire life story to the Chronicler over the course of three days (which, it seems likely, will correspond to three books). In the course of this negotiation we establish several very important things about the book. Firstly, that it's going to be Kvothe's story as narrated by Kvothe. Secondly, that the Chronicler is a renowned debunker whose great passion is seeking out the truth behind legends (this will become A Theme). Thirdly, and most importantly, we learn that Kvothe is totally awesome at everything. We witness Kvothe cracking the shorthand-like cipher in which the Chronicler writes his notes with a speed and efficiency that makes the Universal Translator look plausible, and we learn a little of his dazzling exploits:

I have stolen princesses back from sleeping barrow kings. I burned down the town of Trebon. I have spent the night with Felurian and left with both my sanity ad my life. I was expelled from the University at a younger age that most people are allowed in. I tread paths by moonlight that others fear to speak of during day. I have talked to Gods, loved women, and written songs that make the minstrels weep. You may have heard of me.

Now as the book progresses, we learn that at least some of these claims are not all they seem - Kvothe doesn't so much burn down Trebon as happen to be nearby while it gets burned down by a third party. He gets expelled from the university, but his expulsion is suspended as a matter of course. This is part of the second point established above: the book is basically all about the boundaries between myth and reality, men and legends. Regardless of all that though, the fact remains that Kvothe is totally awesome at everything, and that lies at the heart of my problems with the book.

I should say now, in case it gets lost in all the nitpicking, carping, and pettifogging, that The Name of the Wind is genuinely good and highly readable. It's one of those fantasy books which you can compare to serious literature without sounding totally risible. It deals intelligently with its themes and ideas, its characters are fairly well realized, and it's obviously going somewhere quite interesting.

None of that, however, gets me past the Captain Scarlet problem. "Oh no! how is Kvothe going to get out of this? Oh yeah, he's totally awesome at everything."

Long time Ferretbrainers, or people who know me in real life, will probably be aware that I have a George Silver-like fondness for identifying paradoxes: contradictions which it amuses me to highlight and declare irreconcilable. Kvothe is the perfect example of something I might glibly call the "Macgyver Paradox".

It is widely accepted that a hero who merely has unlimited power isn't interesting to write or read about. There's a reason that Lord of the Rings focuses on Frodo instead of Gandalf, or that Feist no longer writes books about Milamber. If a character can just wave a magic wand and make all his problems go away, he can't face any meaningful obstacles, and if he can't face any meaningful obstacles, he can't have any meaningful development as a character. Unfortunately, people assume that this very sensible, very important rule only applies to supernatural sources of power. Worse, they tend to assume that the best way to avoid relying on supernatural sources of power is to make their character "resourceful".

Of course, there's a giant problem with "resourceful" characters, which is that they wind up being exactly like the all powerful characters only worse. Sure, Superman can force majeure his way out of most situations, but it's relatively easy to think of situations where it would not be helpful or desirable for him to rely on his superpowers. It is much, much harder to think of a problem where it isn't helpful or desirable to "come up with a really clever plan". By trying to create a hero who relies on ingenuity instead of superpowers, all you do is turn ingenuity into a superpower. If Macgyver and Superman were both trapped in a sealed room that was slowly filling up with gas, it's Superman who would be in the most trouble. Sure he could bust his way out, but that might detonate the gas and kill a bunch of innocent people. Macgyver on the other hand can just use the gas to jury-rig a blowtorch, thereby getting himself out of the room and taking care of the explosives in one fell swoop. There's a reason that Batman beats Superman in The Dark Knight Returns: power is always finite, but "resourcefulness" is unlimited.

I suppose I should explain what all this has to do with The Name of the Wind. Basically the book concerns itself with Kvothe's origin story. He is raised as a wandering player, amongst the "Emera Ruh," a race of travelling performers who I won't describe as "Gypsy-like" since I know bugger all about Romany culture. It's no big spoiler to tell you that his idyllic childhood is cut short when his troupe is slaughtered by a group of quasi-mythical demonic entities called the Chandrian (the name seems to be plural). After this he lives wild in the woods for almost a year until he finally breaks two strings on his lute and heads off to the big city to get some more. Here he gets mugged and beaten up in short order (losing his lute in the process), and spends the next three years as a beggar living a horrible, Dickensian hand-to-mouth existence.

So far, so good, except that this goes on for nearly a third of the book, with very little real progress being made, and then suddenly he encounters a storyteller and then apparently "his mind wakes up" and he bluffs his way off of the streets and into comparative wealth and comfort, literally overnight (he pawns a book he's been holding onto for sentimental reasons, and then gets a bunch of free clothes by impersonating a nobleman). If it sounds jarring, it is. It's like that scene in Who Framed Roger Rabbit: "You mean you could have done that at any time?" "Not at any time, only when it was funny."

This pattern continues throughout the rest of the book. Kvothe gets into a bad situation, and then he gets out of it by being totally awesome at everything. Then fate (or his enemies or, dare I say it, the necessity of the plot) gets him into another bad situation, and he gets out of it by being totally awesome at everything. Even that I could almost forgive, except that everything follows the same awkward, jarring pattern as his years as a beggar: helpless ... helpless ... helpless ... totally awesome at everything ... helpless ... helpless.

After he stops being a beggar, Kvothe manages to persuade the University not only to let him in, but also to pay him for the privilege. Here he picks up the obligatory High School Enemy, an obscenely wealthy, obscenely influential nobleman by the name of Ambrose. Perhaps I'd have been more sympathetic towards this plotline if it hadn't been done in ... well ... every single boarding school based story ever. It's got to the stage where I can't even distinguish between the descriptions of Ambrose, that dude from the Black Magician Trilogy, and Draco Malfoy any more (I think they're all blonde, but they all run together in my head). Like all Boarding School Rivals, he's somehow powerful enough to totally wreck Kvothe's life, yet also clearly totally inferior to him in every way.

For example, as part of his continuing struggle to stave off starvation, Kvothe takes to playing his lute at a highly prestigious local music venue. Not only does he wow the audience by playing the single most difficult song in the world ever, but when Ambrose tries to sabotage him by magically cutting one of his lute strings, he completes the song anyway, thereby making people even more impressed at how totally awesome at everything he is. However, his plan to use this event as a springboard to find a noble patron is thwarted because Ambrose tells all the nobles not to support him.

Okay, fine, Ambrose is rich and powerful, but are you honestly telling me that his family has no enemies whatsoever? That there isn't one nobleman in the whole damn city who don't think that ticking off some uppity brat is a fair price to pay for being able to get one of the greatest musicians who ever lived playing at your banquets? (Seriously, when Kvothe plays his lute, people practically ejaculate into their pants he's that good). Is there nobody out there in the cutthroat world of noble politicking who would actually relish the opportunity to piss off Ambrose's family, with an orgasm-inducingly awesome pet musician as an added bonus?

Like with

my review

of the Age of the Five trilogy, I've had to take a step back from what I've just said to think to myself "god, when you write it all down like that it just looks absurd". Kvothe is a musical genius with an eidetic memory, precocious magical talent, wisdom beyond his years (the book constantly tells us how totally young he is " the broken down world weary version we see in the inn is only twenty-five), limitless courage, and infinite resourcefulness who only suffers setbacks at all because the rest of the world goes out of its way to screw him over. Hell, he's supposed to be so cool that he's literally reciting the entire damned novel from memory. The fact that this kind of thing works at all and is in fact quite entertaining to read about is testimony to the genuine merits the book possesses.

When all is said and done, The Name of the Wind is a genuinely engaging, genuinely interesting Fantasy novel. I genuinely enjoyed it and would genuinely recommend it but, as you might have gathered from the fact that I wound up using the word "genuinely" four times in the last sentence, I'm still hugely confused about it (genuinely confused, in fact). I really, really hope that the "Kingkiller Chronicles" (the name of the series, in case I didn't mention) will turn out to be the classic everybody is predicting. I really hope that Kvothe's ludicrously expanding skillset won't start to become annoying and implausible (or rather, more implausible). I really hope that we'll actually find out something about the goddamned Chandrian in the next book. I kind of hope that it will turn out that Kvothe has been totally lying about a lot of this stuff, but I don't think that will happen.

The Name of the Wind (no "In", remember) is an entirely readable, quite well-written book that raises some interesting questions about the boundaries between history and legend, reality and myth. Its protagonist is remarkably likable given that he's a colossal Genioos. The plot is remarkably engaging given that nothing much happens. I'll certainly be picking up the next volume in the hope that I might be able to make some goddamned sense of it all.Themes:

Books

,

Sci-fi / Fantasy

~

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~Comments (

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Rami

at 14:30 on 2008-07-23I'm glad you liked it! Kvothe's total awesomeness made even me, gushy and enthusiastic as I

tend to be, think twice

-- but I really can't wait for the next one... in

a few months' time

, anyway...

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Michal

at 07:44 on 2011-07-02Hmm, I've avoided this book so far for the somewhat silly reason that one of the interior cover blurbs is from Robert J. Sawyer...I've found a strange correlation between "books I dislike" and "has blurb by Robert J. Sawyer", but I really should just give it a shot.

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Dan H

at 12:03 on 2011-07-02I wasn't sure who Robert J. Sawyer was, so I looked him up on Wikipedia and:

a) Wow, he *really* looks like Steven Merchant

b) OMG! He's the guy who wrote that book Kyra's got on her to-read pile about the blind girl who has experimental surgery which allows her to SEE THE INTERNETS!

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Michal

at 16:44 on 2011-07-02

He also nearly ruined my childhood.

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Alasdair Czyrnyj

at 01:12 on 2011-07-03Sawyer also tends to push the "science vs. religion" pretty hard in science/rationalism/whatever's favor in most everything he writes, but he doesn't really understand religion enough to criticize it effectively, so it just comes off as a strawman-fest.

Wow, he *really* looks like Steven Merchant

Really? I thought he was tubbier than Stephen Merchant.

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Vermisvere

at 03:24 on 2011-07-03

Sawyer also tends to push the "science vs. religion" pretty hard in science/rationalism/whatever's favor in most everything he writes

I'd probably be best off avoiding it then. I found that a lot of the books that I read which have the "science vs. religion" concept in them tend to, at one point or another, grind to a painful halt in terms of plot and turn into a mish-mash fest of mental wanking where the characters turn into your average 6th graders debating theology.

Angels and Demons by Dan Brown is a good example. *shudder*

Wow, he *really* looks like Steven Merchant

Hey, he does too!

Well, whadya know...

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Michal

at 04:15 on 2012-01-20Well, I finally gave it a go. Got about 70-some pages in before I gave up.

I think it was the bit where Kvothe deciphers the Chronicler's super-duper-complicated shorthand system in a matter of minutes that had me let out my first gigantic groan. But on a less superficial level, it was just pretty clear that the book was Not For Me.

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Dan H

at 10:14 on 2012-01-20I think that's a fair assessment. This is one of those books where people will tell you to stick with it because it gets better, when in reality it just gets more like itself, which means people who like it start to like it more, while people who don't like it get more and more irritated.

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Dan H

at 20:18 on 2012-01-20Double-posting like a noob, it occurs to me that the bit where he deciphers the Chronicler's shorthand system is a particularly sensible breaking point, because it's not amenable to all of the "unreliable narrator" arguments that apply to most of the rest of Kvothe's Mary Sue qualities. He might be lying about everything else, but he can't be lying about that.

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Michal

at 05:14 on 2012-01-21Well, I did feel particularly sensible at that moment. The framing narrative, at least from my meagre experience of the book, seems to serve more to affirm Kvothe's awesomeness rather than subvert it (he, like, kills demon spiders and knows magic and is super-smart and stuff!).

Are there any inconsistencies in Kvothe's narrative in this book or the next one? Because his voice, when telling this story, is essentially the same as that in the frame, but with an "I" swapped in for the "he". The guy recalls long inconsequential conversations his parents had when he was young in a way that doesn't suggest he's just embellishing and making shit up on the fly. And yes, this is typical of first-person narratives, but I've only really seen bad historical fiction framed in such fashion (

Aztec

comes to mind), and in those cases, we're meant to trust the tale-teller's perfect recall.

I have a feeling I've been spoiled in thast few books I've read that used the first person, and was just disoriented by the fact that no, I

didn't

need to pay close attention and peel back the narrative voice to find out what was really going on. No "wait, the towers are space ships?" moments in

The Name of the Wind

.

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Dan H

at 21:15 on 2012-01-21

Are there any inconsistencies in Kvothe's narrative in this book or the next one? Because his voice, when telling this story, is essentially the same as that in the frame, but with an "I" swapped in for the "he".

There aren't any inconsistencies I can recall (although I might be missing something super-duper subtle). And you're right that there's no meaningful difference between the third-person narration and Kvothe's narration. As with most framing devices, Rothfuss only really pays lip-service to the notion that Kvothe is supposed to be reciting this story from memory.

#Ferretbrain #The Kingkiller Chronicle #Patrick Rothfuss #Dan H

[courtreadsmostlyfiction]

My Best Books of 2018

I thought last year was a hard year, and I think 2018 heard that and said “challenge accepted!” I spend a lot of time this year anxious and depressed, and luckily one of my coping mechanisms is reading (also luckily I have health insurance and found a treatment program to learn more coping skills). My goal was 100 books (same as 2017, and I met that goal on December 31, 2017), but I hit that in August, so I upped the goal to 160. As of this writing, I have read 173 books (holy forking shirtballs!), and here are the best ones: 

Best book regardless of category: There There by Tommy Orange

If I’ve talked to you about books this year, then you’ve heard about this book and about how much I love it (when I thought it was left off the Washington Post 50 best fiction books of 2018, I was going to cancel my subscription; then I turned the page and saw that it was on their 10 best books so all was well). It’s a debut (which is amazing) and expertly grapples with identity and trauma and violence. It’s one of those books where I felt like the author was writing sentences straight from my brain and feelings straight from my heart. I’ve wondered if I love it so much because of my Native identity, and I wonder if I should have a disclaimer that I’m biased, and as I write this, I also don’t care. I’m biased toward fucking awesome books. It’s amazing, it’s on the top lists for a reason, and read it already!

Best fiction:

An American Marriage - first of all, this is $6.28 on kindle today, so buy it if you haven’t read it already. If you made a venn diagram of race, racism, marriage, the American criminal justice system, and injustice, this book would be at the center. The characters are human and there are no easy answers. 

Pachinko - this is an epic novel, about a Korean family living in Japan in the 20th century, that illustrates what immigrants must do to survive. Unfortunately timely. (Also, you should read it even if this weren’t the case, but I don’t often think that epic sagas are page turners, but this was).

Swimming Lessons - If my best fiction list were one of those “one of these things is not like the other” this would be the other. The thing all 4 of these books have in common is incredible writing, but this one feels lighter. I’m not sure if that’s an apt description because the material is heavy, but it feels limited to one family versus entire peoples. It’s smart, tightly plotted, and full of surprises. (The only thing I didn’t L-O-V-E was the ending, but I still gave it a 5 star review because of the other 97% of the book). Anyway, read it, too. (In case you need at least a sentence about the book to consider it: a wife writes letters to her husband and hides them in books, then disappears and twelve years later, her daughters come home when he is ill and thinks he has seen his wife.)

Best mystery/thriller:

The Banker’s Wife - I couldn’t put this down, and I recommended it to Grant before we went to the beach for the week. He told me he had already made his beach reading list, and that I was giving him beach-reading-anxiety. I dared him to read one page, and this book made it to the list. (In the first chapter - a plane containing a banker goes down on its way to Geneva, and in the rest of the book, his widow tries to figure out what happened.)

The Bone Readers - I found this book because it won the 2017 Jhalak prize (for British writers of color) and it deserves much more attention and acclaim. It’s a crime story in the Caribbean with the unforgettable Miss Stanislaus, and I JUST FOUND OUT THAT IT IS THE FIRST BOOK IN A TRILOGY. All best books should be, right? (And it is $3.99 on kindle today!)

Bruno series - If you like Three Pines (of Louise Penny’s making), I think you’d like the Bruno books. Bruno is a rule breaker but moral follower, the books take place in rural France, and there’s a mystery and fabulous descriptions of food. What else do you need?

Best young adult/youth:

Leah on the Offbeat - Did you see the movie Love, Simon? It was based off a book by this same author. Leah is Simon’s bi friend, and I don’t know if I can express how much it meant to read an awesome book with a bi character. I can only imagine what it would have been like if I had read this in middle or high school, and maybe I would have come out to my family before the age of 37.

Children of Blood and Bone - I saw this described as Hunger Games in Africa (which is honestly why I picked it up), but it’s so much more / better than that description. It’s a fantasy about trying to get magic back, and it is a magical book. Read it.

Penderwicks series - I got the first book (The Penderwicks) to read to Ox, but he didn’t love it. I fell head over heels with the girls and wish this series would have been around when I was growing up. See if you can resist Rosalind, Sky, Jane and Batty.

The Vanderbeekers of 141st Street - The kids in this biracial family are determined to not lose their family brownstone in Harlem. So good!

Best romance:

I don’t usually read romance, so I’m not sure if these would be categorized here in a bookstore, but also don’t let this categorization turn you away. If you enjoy rom-com movies, you’d like these.

The Wedding Date - Roxane Gay recommended this book, and it’s so fun and steamy and real. What happens when you get stuck on an elevator with a hot guy? Read it and find out.

Cafe by the Sea - I found Jenny Colgan books this year, and they make me want to run away to Scotland (a place I’ve never really wanted to visit), and open a bookstore or cafe. If you need to escape with a light read (that doesn’t have horrible writing) where it’s pretty likely two people end up together, pick this up. After I read this, I kept reading her books and am now rationing them for myself so I have one when I need a light read or need to kick start my reading mojo.

Best nonfiction:

This blog is CourtReadsMostlyFICTION for a reason, and I rarely pick up non-fiction. So you know the books below have to be phenomenal to make it on my list.

Heavy - I just finished this heartbreaking and searing memoir about trauma, abuse, survival, family, writing, success, black bodies, and weight, and I will be thinking about it for a long time. Kiese, thank you for your courage and words. (I’m also a fan of his novel Long Division.)

Heart Berries - I read this when I was in my partial hospitalization treatment program (and in the memoir, Terese also gets mental health treatment), and while I think it might not have been the best time to read such an honest account, it’s probably a good time for you to read what we do to Native women.

Calypso - I am thankful I live in a time when I get to read new David Sedaris words pretty frequently. I have high expectations for his work, and this sailed over it. It’s still funny, but really thoughtful about suicide and loss and Trump and partners. Also, I read the essay Still Standing (about his episode with a stomach virus) when my whole family was vomiting and shitting and nothing else made us laugh.

Becoming - This is going to come out wrong, but I didn’t think I’d enjoy this book, much less love it. But it’s so real and so readable, and not a typical political memoir. I have loved the Obamas for a long time, but now I might have a new favorite one. It’s number one on the Amazon charts right now, so you’ve probably read it, too, so let’s just talk about how wonderful and human she is, okay?

Best poetry:

There Are More Beautiful Things Than Beyoncè - I saw Morgan Parker read with Roxane Gay, and one of the lines from her poems stuck with me (I just want to understand my savings account. What is happening to my five dollar one cent.) I never read poetry, but read two of her volumes back to back because I loved them so much (and will go back to them, something else I rarely do). Read it.

Best short stories:

You Think It, I’ll Say It - I love Curtis Sittenfeld (I have since Prep, and I’ve read everything she’s written since) but I was d-o-u-b-t-f-u-l of this book since in general I really fucking hate short stories. But I really loved this (beware, I’ve recommended it to two people and one person loved it and one person didn’t), in part because it is frankly post-Trump and because it is painfully and funnily real.

Florida - Let’s read EVERYTHING by Lauren Groff because she is this amazing as a person, and she writes short stories that I love (see paragraph above) and wonderful books. (Disclaimer - the person above who loved YTIISI did not love Florida, because it is dark and accurately portrays Florida.)

Single, Carefree, Mellow - Katharine if you are reading this, can we be friends already? From the author of Standard Deviation (top pick of 2017), this collection of short stories was un-put-down-able. ($5.49 on kindle right now!)

More List(s)!

My fave book recommenders have their top lists here: Matt Compton (if he recommends a book to me, or tweets about it, there’s a 99% chance I will love it); I’ll put a link to Roxane Gay’s list as soon as she publishes it (because it’s ROXANE GAY); the list for the 2019 Tournament of Books.