#I just put it in her bed to see how she’d react and instant snuggles

[xoxoemynn]

Hi, if you've sent me asks/messages in the past week-ish and I haven't responded I'm not ignoring you. Just a ton going on leading up to the funeral and also my energy is a fleeting and fickle thing and maintaining even the simplest of social interactions feels a bit like a fool's errand but I promise I'll respond next week. I love and appreciate you deeply. 💕

To make up for it, have Daphne snoozing with my stuffed Eeyore.

#feeling guilty for having to board Daphne #she doesn’t have a lovey or care for toys #but they recommended leaving her something w my scent #so this is the Eeyore I basically use as an extra pillow every night #I just put it in her bed to see how she’d react and instant snuggles #makes me feel a bit better #personal #Daphne

[doopy-n-loopy]

How would yandere mercs react to us trying to escape late at night?

Well not well that's for sure!

Yan!Mercenaries (TF2) × Reader hcs/ imagines

// Yandere themes, violence, fear play, yandere shit

Defense

Demo

You got out of Demo's bed, you had given him more alcohol than usual to keep him asleep. You looked over the heavily snoring figure beside you. The scot had his mouth wide open and a bottle of beer cluched in his palm. You leaned in and blew on his eye to make sure he was asleep, and there was no physical response from him. You then quickly slipped on your clothes and pulled out the small bag you've been hiding behind the nightstand, it was filled with money and other essentials like pepper spray, sunglasses, and a cloak.

You walked out of the room, taking one last look at the scot before tiptoing out of the house, avoiding scattered empty alcohol containers on the ground.

Just as you were about to leave, you heard a voice from behind you

"y/n? What are ye doing?"

He was drunk of course, but when wasn't he? It was like he was sober in his own way. Sober enough to recognize that guilty look on your face. His expression twisted into an angry snarl and he grabbed you by the wrist, dragging you down the stairs into the basement

"you'll stay here till you know how to listen"

He said trying to conceal his anger, but failing to do so

He could also just have a breakdown depending on the type of night it was and guilt you into staying

He will be a lot more strict on you

Heavy

You were looking to escape in the night but heavy lives in an eternal blizzard basically so... That's not a great idea

But lets say you've been preparing for awhile and got everything set up, a snow mobile, warm clothes, and a torch

But the moment you get to the shed, you find that your snow mobile is broken

Heavy then appears out of a corner of darkness with an upset expression

It's silent for a moment, until he speaks

"After all Heavy has done for you? Why?"

You felt guilt building up into your throat as you tried to search for an excuse. Unable to find one. He isn't a very restricting yandere, in fact, he's much tamer than most, he's given you basically all he has and to do this is like a slap in the face.

"Heavy will forgive you, if you just come back" he said while smiling

You were then gently pushed back out into the cold in the direction of his house, where you'd be staying once more

If he was in a bad mood, he'd be a little more rough

He also will place more restrictions on you but it's not like you'd notice considering it's not much

Engineer

You were about to leave in your car at night, when you tried turning it on, it wouldn't start. Engie then walks in front of your car and waves at you for you to come out, which after hesitating, you comply.

He walks over to you and hugs you, which confuses you. He tells you it's alright and that you don't have to go

"I'm sorry but, I want to leave" you stutter out

He panics internally and grips your shoulder, looking you in your eye

"do you know what could happen to you out there? Rapists! Murderers! The world ain't sugar n' honey, darlin"

"but-" you respond, suddenly cut off by him

"but you're safe here with me. I'll always protect you"

He hugs you once again, sucked into that warm embrace, you calm down and walk back with him

You were restricted from certain things from then on

Offense

Scout

You got into a fight with him earlier and in the middle of the night, you decided it was time to leave.

You packed a bag of clothes, some water, money, and other essentials

As you got your keys, you were met with a sleepy eyed scout who had bedhead

"Y/N....? The hell are ya doin?"

It takes a second for scout to process what's going on. You're grabbing your keys, you're fully dressed, and you had a suitcase with you

"Jeremy. I'm leaving*

You said sternly. You could see in his eyes that his heart shattered into a million pieces

"Wai- what no! No no no no! Please y/n you gotta stay please!"

He begged, grabbing onto your coat as you began to walk out. Tears formed on his face but you ignored it

"I can't put up with this anymore"

You said, voice cracking from the pain in your heart. Scout was sobbing now, he kneeled in front of you to stop you

"I'm so sorry I'm so sorry! I'll change I swear I'll become better! You want to go to eat out more? I got the money! I'll treat you nicely!"

You didn't believe a word he said, but with the way he was talking, it had to be true.

"Please I love you so much and it would kill me to lose you... Literally... You're my world to me, baby"

You bit your quivering lip as you looked down at him like he was a sad puppy. You sniffled and dropped your bags, huffing in defeat

".. I'm sorry. I'm just tired"

Scout was overjoyed to hear this. That night he clung to you

Scout didn't really become more strict, but he did become more loving to avoid that again.

Pyro

This one is scary, scarier than support classes even

You were almost out the door when they spotted you. They gave you an inquisitive look. You both shared a minute of uncomfortable silence before you bolted out the door. Pyro was unprepared for this, giving you some time to create distance between you two.

But Pyro was quick to get ready and they were out the door in no time with their flamethrower, ready to burn down acres of forests in order to catch you

You could hear pyro approaching, knowing that once you reach your car at the end of the base, you'll be safe and free.

While you were running, it seemed like their footsteps had been fading ever since they've gotten louder. Until you couldn't hear it anymore. You didn't pay any mind to this since your objective was just getting ti your car

When you arrived at the boarders of their territory when you stopped in your tracks

Pyro was leaning over their axe by the car, looking smug as ever. You looked towards your car and gasped.

Pyro had shredded the tires and broke open every window so you couldn't escape. You stood there as pyro approached you and swept you up in their arms, snuggling their mask into your neck the entire way home while you couldn't help but softly sob

Soldier

Soldier would lose his shit

He's already super strict, forces you to get up at 5 am every morning and run laps like you're in the military, makes you eat either MRE packets or home cooked food and you better hope it's an MRE pack because he cannot cook

So when he sees you at your car late at night, he screams at the top of his lungs enough to scare you into shock

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING, MAGGOT? GET BACK HERE THIS INSTANT!"

I could see this going one of two ways, either complying or he has to chase you down (which he will)

If he has to chase you down, he won't be happy about it, and become even more strict than before (which I don't think is possible but it's soldier)

Support

Sniper

You... What?

How did you even get the idea that you could escape?

You live in his fucking van, you won't have a car other than his van

But lets say you saw the chance for escape, and tried to take it. You either got shut down the moment you got out of bed or you were lucky enough to get far away from the van

"get your bloody ass back to bed" is something he'd say if he shut you down the moment you stood up

But this man is a sniper, he can scope you out easily, and he won't hesitate to use a tranq on you

After that, you're back in the chains

Spy

Scary

Did you really think you could?

He knew you were gonna escape before you even escaped

He'd make very subtle remarks about it and remind you of what he could do

"Do you remember about the undercover mission in Spain back when I was working for the government that I told you about? When I was able to find the traitor using three clues. Even after all his records were erased"

Subtle shit like that to remind you who's in control

But lets say you didn't take the hint, and you decided to try and escape anyways

He'd catch you in the living room trying to escape, and send you back to bed

Or, you'd get lucky and be able to run away, meaning he'd be on a job

Trust me, he will find you within 48 hours, 24 if you aren't moving that much

He's very manipulative so he'd try to make you feel bad about it.

Much more strict afterwards

Medic

I have a feeling he'd already knowz but not to the extent that spy does

He notices your behavior, and how you're starting to become a bit more.. energetic?

Anyways, like spy, he'll warn you subtly

"You seem to always find yourself injured in any way. And like they say, a medic can track an injured person like a gps system, ja?"

If you decide to escape, he'll have some fun with you definitely. He'll late you run far enough to think that you're finally free, before he catches you and brings you back. He's sadistic.

He'll laugh at your face and degrade and humiliate you, making you regret ever trying

After that, he's much more strict, and demanding from you

Bonus cause I wanted to: Pauling

Pauling like spy, can track people very easily

I wouldn't even be surprised if she convinced medic to help put a tracker in you

Well, she'd be at work checking your location every hour. And the moment she finds out that you're not in the house but at a motel, she's pissed.

She has to quickly finish up work before taking her time to go catch you, and trust me, if Pauling takes time off work for something it's important

Once she finds you, she tells you to come out, trying to keep it civil. When you don't, she ends up busting through the door and taking you herself.

On the way home, she complains about how you worried her and made her miss some work like a parent going to pick up their sick kid from school

She eventually cools off after she gets you home, but she is definitely more strict

Gify was acting up so I couldn't download any more gifs 😭

Anyways feel free to request again!

#yandere headcanons #yandere x reader #yandere tf2 #yandere tf2 × reader #doopyloopyyandere #doopyloopy's asks #doopyloopy's headcannons

[queen-iduna-of-arendelle]

Truths about the Past

A.N. @hyejootteokpoki wanted: 'iduna tells agnarr about her past the day elsa refuses to let her parents touch her' of the accident. That kinda fits better.

Ao3  ff.net

“Will you sing it to us? Please?” Asked Elsa. She and her little sister Anna were looking at her with big, pleading eyes. Well, she did mention Ahtohallan already, might as well sing the song. “Okay.” The queen climbed on the bed, the girls knew exactly what it meant and made room for her. “Cuddle close.” She said as she made herself comfortable on Elsa’s bed. “Scooch in.” Both girls cuddled up to her, while Iduna hugged them close to her. After making sure they’re both comfortable, she began to sing.

Where the north wind meets the sea

there’s a river full of memory

While Elsa listened intently, Anna opened her hand and drew on her palm. The queen raised her hand and boobed the little girl’s nose. Then she began to run her little finger over the bridge of her nose. A trick she’s learned early one with Elsa.

Sleep, my darling, safe and sound

For in this river all is found

Soon enough Anna was fast asleep and snoring. Elsa giggled and got off of her to bring Anna to bed. Cradling the little girl in her arms, she got off the bed and brought Anna to hers.

In her waters, deep and true

Lay the answers and a path for you

Iduna tucked Anna in bed, closing her open mouth and pulling the covers up. Then she went back to Elsa, who was sitting at the edge of the bed and watched. She scooped her up and went to the window, where the northern lights shined beautifully.

Dive down deep into her sound

But not too far or you’ll be drowned

At the warning, Iduna leaned over Elsa, while pressing their foreheads together. Elsa giggled, putting her hand on her cheek. Smiling back, Iduna straightened again and adjusted her little girl in her arms, while Elsa snuggled up to her.

Yes, she will sing to those who’ll hear

And in her song, all magic flows

But can you brave what you most fear?

Can you face what the river knows?

Then she went back to Elsa’s bed.

Where the north wind meets the sea

There’s a mother full of memory

Iduna tucked her oldest in, too. She lay down like the good girl that she was, while the brunette pulled the covers over her.

Come, my darling, homeward bound

Where all is lost, then all is found

There was no need for her sleeping technique on Elsa anymore, so all she did was brush her fingers over her cheek and gave her a kiss on her forehead. The little blonde wrapped her arms around her neck for a last hug and kissed her cheek. After hugging her back for a few seconds, they let go of each other.

“Goodnight, little Snowflake.” Said Iduna, as she ruffled her daughters hair gently. “Goodnight, mama.” Elsa smiled at her sleepily and closed her eyes. “Have sweet dreams.” The queen whispered as she wrapped her shawl around her shoulders again and left the room, only to run into her husband who was obviously eavesdropping.

“Sorry.” He said, looking sheepish. “I heard you sing and...couldn’t leave.”

Iduna smiled at him. “You’re too cute.” Then they went to their own room in silence. Only when they entered their bed chambers, did Agnarr talk again. “What kind of lullaby was this?”

The brunette froze. She really hoped he wouldn’t ask. “That’s...” Iduna began and turned to her husband. “That’s just a song my mother sang to me when I was young.”

Now he surely had more questions. She never really talked about her past, obviously. Especially when he was still clearly remembering what happened in the Enchanted Forest...He –and all Arendellians— will hate her for her heritage. Maybe something worse...

“Do you believe in it? That river?” He asked then and Iduna was torn with her answer. Of course she believed in Ahtohallan. But ‘normal’ people wouldn’t. Right?

“Uh...I- I don’t know. Why do you ask?”

“Well... Began Agnarr thoughtfully, coming closer to her. “Imagine if it’s real. Maybe it could tell us something about Elsa’s powers.” Yes. Of course she’s thought about this before. Ahtohallan surely knew why Elsa got her magic.

“What’s wrong?” Agnarr’s question made her look up at his worried face. “You look worried.” Well, usually she’d give back a cheeky reply, but now…And he noticed that, too. “Tell me what’s bothering you.” She looked back down, biting her lower lip. Should she really tell him the truth? Of course she knew him better than when they met, but there was still the fear that he’ll be mad at her. That even after all the years together he’ll hate her.

Iduna pulled the shawl around her tighter, as if it -or her mother- could help her with her decision. Of course, Agnarr knew all her antics and mostly guessed her thoughts and feelings correctly. Coming as close as possible, he cupped her face with with right hand and made her look up at him. “I love you.” Was all he said, and these three words were enough.

“There’s something I need to tell you about my past...and where I’m from... She said, still hesitantly, still afraid of his reactions.

“Go on, my love.” Iduna felt like crying this instant. He knew exactly what to say to make her feel loved. Just the way he’s looking at her...So full of love. And as Gerda always said 'as if she’s the reason the sun shines at day and the moon at night, as if she’s truly the most important thing in his life –aside from their kids of course.

“Please don’t hate me for this.” She immediately got a confused look from him, but he’ll understand it soon...Iduna took a deep breath before talking. “You said you’d like to know who saved you back then... Agnarr nodded. “Well...I know who it was...”

When he opened his mouth to speak, she put a finger on his lips to silently tell him to let her finish. “I was there...when it happened.” Now his surprised face turned into confusion again. Iduna herself needed a few more seconds to continue. Her heart pounded so fast that it felt like it’s gonna burst out of her chest at any time.

Agnarr gave her all the time she needed, waiting patiently for her to continue. “Actually, I...was the one...who saved you.” His eyes widened in shock, but he waited for her to continue. “I’m...a Northuldra.” She finally admitted, after all these years of telling lies, or hiding things entirely. It felt good to have finally said it, but she was still afraid. Especially since Agnarr was still staring at her in shock.

Iduna looked down then, not wanting to see the hatred in his eyes once the shick subsided. “I’m sorry. I couldn’t tell you this. I thought you’ll hate me for it. Especially when you still remembered what happened. And even if you said you don’t know who started it, my people are also responsible for your fathers death. I’m sure you would hate me for this. And all your people. Maybe sentence me to death...” Hiding her face behind her hand, she started to cry.

She felt so tiny now, compared to him. And she wouldn’t even fight back if he wanted to punish her. She deserved it. She deserved his whole wrath. But then she was suddenly pulled out of her thoughts, when Agnarr cupped her face with both hands now, tilted her face up and kissed her. That’s one thing she never expected to happen. And he was even crying as well. He kissed her almost desperately and when they had to pull away for air, he leaned his forehead against hers.

“What are you saying?” He asked, staring into her eyes with nothing but pure love. “How can you think I’d ever hate you? You saved me. In more ways than you think.”

Only when he caressed her cheeks with his thumbs, did she notice that fresh tears fell. “I really don’t care what you are or where you came from. I love you for who you are and nothing will ever change it.”

Iduna felt even more tears gliding down her cheeks, but this time out of happiness. She really should’ve known that he’d react like that. That her fears weren’t real. “I love you, too.” She sobbed, wrapping her arms around him and burying her face in the crook of his neck. Agnarr didn’t waste any time to hug her back, wrapping his arms around her waist and leaning his head on hers.

“You’re not at all responsible for anything that happened that day. Except that you saved my life, of course. And I understand why you kept it a secret. Our people fought and we'd be enemies in theory. But there’s one thing I’d like to know...” To be honest, Iduna couldn’t help but feel anxious again. “Were you the girl flying in the air?”

Oh...”You saw me?” She felt him nod against her. “Was that the wind spirit?”

“Yes. We were best friends actually. She was also the one who helped me bring you to safety.”

“I guess I owe you both my life, then.” The brunette shook her head. “You don't. That was a natural reaction. You would've done the same.”

“That's true.” They stayed like that in silence for a few more minutes then. Iduna thought all his questions were answered now, but apparently there was one more thing. “And the voice?”

“Me. I called the spirit for help. I'm really glad she helped.”

“Me too.” Now that everything was out in the open, Iduna felt so much lighter. As if a heavy weight was lifted from her heart. Everything will be better from now on. But just as she thought this, they both jumped when they heard a desperate voice calling them. “Mama! Papa!” It was Elsa. The royal couple looked at each other for a second, before running out of the room and to the source of Elsa's calling.

#iduna #agnarr #elsa #anna #agduna #fanfic #fanfiction #disney #frozen #all is found

[chysgoda]

Small Worries

Word Count: 1089

This has been kicking around my documents for a few months. It's part of a few stories dealing with some real life observations of my stepdaughter (I hate that term by the way) and how she has been reacting to the stresses in her life and also my own feelings about her and having to let her go back to her mom.  So these will get scattered through the blog as I get to a point where I can actually process whatever it is enough to write something coherent. 

Bel yawned as she peeked out from under the quilt. Her foster moms were still sleeping and probably would for several more hours, if not the whole day. She had crawled into the bed and curled up against Art’imis side and the Au Ra was wrapped around her hyur lover. Bel's ears pressed flat against her head when cold air assaulted her face. Looking over she saw that the fire in the grate had burned down to cold embers. She could rebuild it, she’d made the maids show her how. If a maid slipped into their room and startled one of the warriors awake fists would be swinging before conscious thought engaged. But they always seemed to know when it was Bel that had snuck into their room. So Bel took on the job of making sure that the fire was always warm when Melisande and Art’imis slept off aether exhaustion after hard-won battles. They always slept for at least half a day after battling a primal, after they had fought Gaius van Belsar and the ultima weapon they’d slept for nearly two and a half days. 

Frowning she climbed out of the bed and went to build the fire up again. When the initial work was done she sat on the thick rug in front of the fire to tend it until she was sure it wouldn’t go out. Her ears twitched at a change in the air and she looked up to the granite mantle. A dragonet perched next to the collection of knick-knacks and trophies that her foster moms had accumulated while in Ishgard. She gave the dragonet a small wave.

“You are troubled little one.” The rumbling voice always felt strange in her head, Warm and comforting but bigger than she could understand all at once. 

Bel shrugged and whispered, “They came back. So I shouldn’t be worried anymore.”

The dragon tilted its head looking at the Miqo’te girl for a long moment before he hopped from the ledge of the mantle and glided to her shoulder. He settled there and wrapped his tail around the base of her throat gently. Absently Bel reached up and scratched his belly. They sat for a while watching the fire. Slowly the dragon’s warm bulk and patient silence eased the tension in the child’s gut and back. When she spoke again she continued to whisper so she didn’t disturb her sleeping mothers. “Bianca and I thought things would get better when they got back with Uncle Estinien and said Nidhogg was dead, but they’re just worse. And Ser Aymeric got hurt and Uncle Haurchefant died and something was wrong with Estinien’s armor but my mamas didn’t have time to explain and Bianca’s Daddy wouldn’t, but it made us feel sick. Then they found Auntie ‘Stola, but Uncle ‘stinien...”

“Breath” the order rumbled in her head and broke the frantic flow of words when Bel instinctively drew in a deep breath.  The dragon waited patiently as the child rubbed her cheeks dry of tears. “There is naught that you can do except thrive. So long as you thrive they will remember what light should be Little One.”

“I’m not little.” Bel��s ears flattened to her skull the instant the words out. That had sounded petulant even to her. 

Another warm and too large chuckle rumbled through her head. “It has been many eras since I last heard that protest.”

“Mama Mel said they want to take me to Aynx Trine to meet Vidofnir, is she your granddaughter? Mama Art said her father is Hrasvalger -”  the ‘A’ was drawn out when a yawn abruptly escaped, “but he’s a big white jerk.” 

The king of wyrms stretched his head up and actually trilled in amusement. A sleepy grumble drifted from the bed and Bel put a finger to her lips to silently shush the dragon. Midgardsomer readjusted himself on his shoulder. “It is not surprising your mother would come to that conclusion.” 

“I don’t know what to do, all the dragoons are scared. They won’t call it that but they are, and my mamas are sad like they get after they’ve fought a primal and there are people that got tempered.”  Bel worried the end of her tail and her ears had drooped miserably to the sides. Midgardsomer leaned forward using her wings for balance and smacked her hands. Bel made a half-strangled yelp when soft, sharp dragonette claws caught her skin enough to sting but not draw blood. She scowled at the ancient dragon who returned the scowl with an implacable and expectant gaze.  The child held out valiantly for a few moments before she ducked her head and let go of her tail. 

The dragon nodded satisfied enough to settle back down. “There is naught you can do for the world beyond your home little one. You must needs grow into your own blessings and convictions. For now, be the little light and terror your mothers’ need and that is all that should be asked of a hatchling.”   

Bel sighed gustily which earned her another warm chuckle. The sound of someone stirring on the bed made her look behind to see Melisande to prop herself up on an elbow and stare blearily at the strange pair sitting in front of the fire.  “Don’t bother the old man, you don’t know where he’s been.” 

Midgardsormer snorted indignantly. The little dragonette form seemed to run together for an instant before vanishing in a silent pop of aether.  Bel yawned and then rushed back to the bed when she saw her mom was holding the blanket open to join them. She scrambled over Art’imis who grumbled but readjusted enough that Bel could snuggle in between the warriors of light. She yawned as the shared body heat and heavy quilt lulled her back to sleep. She wasn’t happy with being told there wasn’t anything she could do, but it was something she and Bianca could work on tomorrow. For now, both of her mamas had come home, battered and bruised, but alive. That was enough to soothe her mind and heart to sleep. Several minutes later when the small family and squirmed and flailed their way into a comfortable pile and their breathing evened out the dragonette popped back into existence on the mantle. He watched over the three, sweet and bit memories rolling through the king of wyrms as he remembered a different family. Tomorrow there would be other troubles and memories, for now, he kept watch over his charges.

#ffxiv #ffxiv fanfiction #midgardsormr #bel aliender #the smols #or one of them at least #hey look I forgot to format

[ialwayscomewhenyoucall]

‘til Midnight

chapter 4/5

ao3 | ch 1 | ch 2 | ch 3

twelve x rose, Into the Dalek coda

“Come on,” says the Doctor, breaking their silence. It’s a comfortable one this time. “Drink up. I make good hot cocoa, you know. Only the best ingredients.” As he talks he mops up the mess; in keeping with the diner theme there’s a silver dispenser of napkins on one edge of the table, flanked by salt and pepper shakers. It’s a ridiculous setup, but he’s thankful for the heat of Rose pressed up against his side, her hand resting lightly on his thigh. Yes, he’ll thank his TARDIS later. She’s a good ship. Pushy, but good. “You know, vanilla from the Chantor highlands on Rina’s third moon, sugar from Turees 9, cinnamon from Odom Goe.”

Rose looks at him quizzically. “What about the cocoa?”

He gives her an ‘are you kidding me’ look as he stretches his arm across the back of the booth. “Earth, of course. Do you honestly think there’s better chocolate anywhere in the universe?”

She laughs, and he buzzes with the the feel of her body against his side.

“Right.” She leans her head on his shoulder and takes a sip of her cocoa. “Mmm, that is good. Not quite what mum used to make, but you remembered the cinnamon.”

He doesn’t tell her he stopped putting cinnamon in cocoa after she left, that just the smell of cinnamon was too painful a memory. And after today...well, we’re in the present now, aren’t we? Let’s not think about tomorrow.

Four hours, seven minutes, forty three seconds, forty two seconds, forty one seconds…

He sips his cocoa.

Kissing the crown of her head, he murmurs into her hair, “I did mean to get marshmallows, you know. Shall I?”

“Don’t you dare move.”

He chuckles. “Wouldn’t dream of it.”

Warm and content, Rose sighs and snuggles closer. After a few minutes her breathing evens, her heart rate begins to slow, her muscles begin to relax, one by one. He thinks back to the time of day and her job at Torchwood on the parallel earth, and then takes a measure of the exhaustion he’s noticed in her thus far. Softly the Doctor says, “Rose, how long have you been awake?”

She blinks up at him, and he can see the fogginess in her thoughts. “Um. Twenty… uh, twenty-two hours? Twenty-three? Give or take.” Her smile is sweet, more than half asleep already.

He stands and scoops her into his arms all in one motion; quite a feat, considering the ridiculous booth. She gives a little shriek of a laugh.

“Let’s get you to bed.”

“Why, Doctor,” she says coyly, wrapping her arms around his neck and batting her eyes at him.

He freezes mid-step, nearly dropping her. “Rose,” he says, attempting to keep his voice as even, as gentle, as possible. “My Rose. You need to sleep.”

She struggles in his arms, panicking. “I don’t want to sleep, Doctor! I don’t have much time left! There’s not enough time!” She’s crying again, clutching at his shirt and pounding a fist on his chest. His hearts constrict. She sobs softly into his neck, tears soaking his collar, repeating over and over, “Not enough time… Not enough time…”

He sits her on the tabletop and takes her face in his hands. “There is time enough for us, Rose. There is.”

There isn’t. Not for him anyway. No matter when he says goodbye to her it’s going to break his hearts, but he has to make her believe what he’s saying. There is time enough for Rose and the Doctor, just not this Doctor, just not in this now… Every word he speaks feels like self-betrayal, but it’s all for her. She is all that matters.

“I need you to trust me. I promise I won’t let you sleep too long, but you’re done in. You need at least an hour. Can you trust me to wake you up?” He looks into her teary eyes, draws her close; he does not break eye contact as he gently kisses her lips. “I will not let you disappear while you are asleep. I will not.”

She relaxes, just a bit. “Alright. Take me to bed, Doctor.” She re-buries her face in his neck.

He groans inwardly. He’s almost certain it’s a sleepy, innocent remark, but his body can’t help but react. Is she trying to destroy him? She’s certainly trying to destroy his resolve.

Again he cradles her in his arms. She keeps her arms around his neck, one hand absently running through the hair at the nape of his neck. He can feel her breath against the skin of his throat. Once again a small part of his brain says “think of something else, think of frog slime in June, think of that time you climbed the same mountainside for thirty hours before you realized you were being misdirected,” but the louder part shrieks, “shut up shut up, treasure every moment of this; breathe her scent while you can, memorize the weight of her in your arms, because soon she will disappear and you will never see her again you idiot.”

In the end it’s no contest. Rose is here, and soon she will be gone, and every moment matters. Even the ones that bring exquisite pain.

Rose must be more awake than she seems, because he hears a muffled, “Doctor, you passed my room.”

“Yes.”

Soon she’s going to think that’s the only word he knows. Either that or she’s going to figure out that he’s avoiding certain subjects. This time he doesn’t want to explain that he’s taking her to his room. Or, actually, he doesn’t want to explain why he’s taking her to his room. They’d fallen asleep together in her bed before, many times. After a taxing adventure, after a long evening watching movies in the TARDIS, sometimes just because. He’d walk her back to her room, tuck her into her bed, and just...stay. But she’d never even seen his room. So he’s taking her there now, and tucking her into his bed. Partly so she can have the memory, but mostly so he can. So when she’s gone he can bury his face in a pillow that once cradled Rose’s head, so he can feel the ghost of her beside him, so he can imagine the sound of her breath and heartbeat echoing in his space.

Her scent won’t linger long, but he has a good memory.

Rose’s breath catches when she realizes where they are. Eyes wide, she says “You know, all that time we traveled together, I sometimes wondered if you actually had a bed of your own. You slept in my bed. You fell asleep in the library when you were really tired. That one time you fell asleep on a table on that human colony...Elizabeth, was it? But that was because there was ginger in the pie and you didn’t realize and you had all that wine and…” She can’t finish the story, she’s too overcome by giggles. It doesn’t matter, he remembers. And of course she’d fixate on that time he was drunk. He huffs. She giggles again, then continues. “But in all our time together you never said, ‘I’m off to bed’ or anything like that.”

Standing her on her feet, the Doctor rests a palm on Rose’s cheek. “It’s not a place I often bring people. Not ever, really. I come here to sleep, which is rare, or to think. It reminds me of home, and that’s not always a good thing. Not since the Time War, anyway. If I hadn’t lost y--” Pain flashes across his face, and her giggles disappear in an instant, replaced by heartache that mirrors his own. “But I did, so you never got to see this room. But now you’re here. With me.” He nods toward a doorway off to the side. “Washroom’s in there. I’ll bet the TARDIS put some pajamas in there for you.”

She blinks at him a few times, eyes wet with unshed tears, then rises on her tiptoes to brush the ghost of a kiss on his lips. Then she’s gone, disappearing through the doorway to change.

He lets out a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding.

When she slips out again a few minutes later she’s wearing soft blue pajamas, a set she’d worn when she traveled with him before. She’s fingering the edge of the tank top, and he can almost see the memories passing through her mind.

Resurfacing from her memories, she looks up to see the Doctor leaning against his bed. Apparently she hadn’t properly noticed it before. Her eyes nearly pop out of her head. “Doctor! That bed! It’s...it’s gigantic! It’s bigger than the entire room I had growing up. And are those actually stairs leading up to it?!”

“Well it’s not an entire staircase, just three steps,” he scoffs. “And while I’ll admit it’s large, I think you’re exaggerating a bit about the size. It is nice for stretching out in, though. I am sometimes rather tall.” He shrugs.

Rose crosses the space between them and wraps her arms around his waist, folding herself into his embrace. “Never stop surprising me, Doctor,” she whispers.

Oh, the metacrisis will be a surprise, he thinks, but quickly pushes that out of his mind. Here. Now. That’s what Rose wants.

“Into bed,” he says, and swings her up onto the soft mattress.

She squeaks in surprise.

“An hour, then?” he asks, automatically returning her smile.

“You’re stayin’, aren’t you?” She looks almost hurt.

“Of course. I won’t leave you.”

She looks at him like he’s daft. “I meant up here, Doctor. Stayin’ up here, in this bed, with me. I won’t go to sleep unless you’re holdin’ me.”

Just look at that stubborn face, those exhausted, shining eyes. How can he say no?

The tension in his shoulders eases the tiniest bit. “Then hold you I shall, my Rose.” He drapes his coat across the back of a nearby chair, toes off his shoes, and climbs the steps up to his bed. He’s not at all surprised to see she’s settled into the pillow he always sleeps on. She always seems to know these things. His hearts speed up just thinking that even for a short time his pillow will smell like Rose. Sliding across the bed and under the heavy quilt he pulls her body against his, her back pressing against his chest, his face buried in her hair. For a long moment they stay like this, just memorizing each other.

Rose breaks the silence. “Doctor, if I had a bed this comfortable I’d never leave it.”

“Superior--”

“Biology, yeah, I know,” she interrupts with a sleepy giggle. “But still…”

It’s his turn to interrupt her. “Sleep. The longer you stay awake the more anxious I get. Your fragile human body…” He runs fingertip along her bare arm and she shivers. He clears his throat. “Sorry. I forget myself.” He tries to put a bit of space between them but she pushes against him, and no words are needed.

He sighs, and he isn’t sure if it’s frustration or joy. Maybe it’s both.

“Alright.” His voice is low, soothing. He can tell from her breathing that she is nearly asleep. “I’ll wake you in an hour. I promise.”

Three hours, forty-four minutes, fifty-seven seconds, fifty-six seconds, fifty-five seconds…

“Just don’t leave me,” she mumbles.

“Never again,” he lies.

**

for @doctorroseprompts 31 Days of Ficmas || day 31 - midnight

#lirael writes #31 days of ficmas #doctorroseprompts #twelve x rose #dw fic #into the dalek coda #the twelfth doctor #rose tyler #dimension hopping rose #bed sharing #yes it's a sad one #i'm not sorry though #not really #;)

[icecubelotr44]

“No, stop!” (Whumptober 2018 Day 4)

For @la-vie-en-whump‘s Whumptober 2018 prompts.

All prompts from last and this year: HERE Previous Days: Stabbed | Bloody Hands | Insomnia |

“You’re sitting at our house, in our home, watching Alice.  She’s sick so she won’t do much more than sleep; what do you think is going to happen?”  Killian laughed under his breath as Liam leveled him with a baleful look before checking the safety on his weapon once more.

“I’ll not have anything happen under my watch, little brother,” Liam explained anyway, tucking the gun behind a papier-mâché heart that Alice had made for them in kindergarten.  “You two go, enjoy your anniversary.  Alice will be in safe hands with me.”

Killian smiled easily, wrapping an arm around Emma’s shoulders before dropping a kiss to the crown of her head.  “We know, Liam.  We’ll be back early.”

“Go!” he ordered, shaking his head vehemently.  “Stay out late.  Like you said, she’ll probably sleep most of the evening and your other little monster is running amok at the Nolans’.  How often do you two get an entire night to yourselves?  I’ll sleep upstairs if it gets too late.”

“Go, Papa!” Alice’s voice croaked from the doorway behind them. “I wanna stay with Uncle Liam.  He lets me stay up late!”

Killian turned with a mock scowl as Liam sputtered good-naturedly. “He does, does he, Starfish?”

Alice nodded unabashedly, her cheeks pink with fever and her bright eyes already drooping with fatigue.  “And we made s’mores last time!”

“Alice Jones!” Liam chided with more than a hint of laughter in his words.  “You promised that was a secret!”

Alice giggled, her hands clapping over her mouth comically. Killian swooped in, picking her up and settling her on his hip.  She was getting far too big for him to do this still, but he was loathe to give it up.

He would always think of her as his baby girl, even after she was long grown and her brother was, too.

“All right, little luv,” Killian mumbled into her untamed hair – it smelled like strawberries.  “You be good for Uncle Liam, all right?”

“Yes, Papa,” she intoned dutifully, her eyes serious as she stared into his.  She then spoiled it by leaning in to give him a kiss and blowing a raspberry into his cheek instead.

Emma laughed, leaning in to brush a kiss over Alice’s forehead before Killian transferred her to Liam’s arms.  She snuggled in automatically.

“We’ll see you in the morning, all right?” Emma asked their daughter, settling a shawl around her shoulders and checking her clutch for her phone.

“Okay, Mama!”

If Killian had known what they were going to come home to, he never would have left that moment.

True to prediction, Alice hadn’t lasted much more than an hour after her parents left for their evening out.  Liam had put her to bed with her beloved – if a bit ratty now – stuffed rabbit, standing at her door to watch her sleep long after she’d drifted off. He marveled at it sometimes – the ease with which Killian had fallen into father and he into uncle.  Their world was a dangerous one, there had been far too many close calls in the not so distant past, but they could make it safer so that Alice wouldn’t know the same fear they had growing up.

Eventually, he’d made his way to the living room, checking the locks on every window and double checking that the alarm was set on his way. Alice wasn’t the only one who was tired. He had been working overtime the last couple weeks to make sure that JR Solutions’ books were in order to keep them in the black for the next quarter.  That many numbers almost made him wish he was still in the field with Killian.

Almost.

He wasn’t sure when he’d fallen asleep, thoughts of making his way up to ‘his’ bedroom across from Alice’s the last thing he remembered. But one loud crash upstairs had him up and sprinting for the stairs in an instant.  He’d thought that maybe Alice had fallen out of bed or tripped over one of her toys on the way to the bathroom.  But that thought flew out the window when more crashes and Alice’s muffled shouting reached his ears.

Something was terribly wrong.

Liam didn’t have time to think, he only reacted, throwing himself at the first man he set eyes on.  They both crashed to the floor amidst a pile of pillows, blankets, and stuffed toys.  Alice’s bunny stared Liam in the face accusingly, but he didn’t have a moment to think about it before rolling and trying to incapacitate the bastard in his niece’s room.

There were four more of them.

“Alice!” he cried out, slamming the man’s head into the floor and stepping over his unconscious body as he propelled himself forward into the next man.  He could hear his niece struggling, yelling through what might have been someone’s hand, but he couldn’t see her.  Couldn’t get to her.  Couldn’t-

Someone behind him shouted, a guttural yell of pain that he hadn’t caused and he whirled around to see one of the bastards shaking his hand and Alice’s pajama-clad backside scampering down the hall.

Good girl.

With Alice running free from the room, Liam could concentrate solely on keeping the rest of the men away from her.  His little love was smart; she’d call her parents, Uncle Will, and then the police if she had time.  Liam just had to keep these assholes away long enough to give her time.

That started with following the bastard who’d chased her out of the room.  Liam flew down the hall, following in his footsteps and tackling him into a wall amidst a cascade of falling picture frames.  Alice and her brother’s school photos littered the floor around him as he fell, landing punches and trying to get his hands around the man’s neck so he could snap it.  There were still two more men; he didn’t have time to-

BANG!

The sound came out of nowhere, startling Liam into a full stop just as he’d knelt to full height, intent on wrapping a discarded scarf – Emma’s, he was sure – around his assailant’s neck.  The sound was as foreign as it was familiar, not belonging in this house.  Never in this house.  Here where it was supposed to be safe; where Alice was allowed to grow and play and learn without worrying about exit strategies and contingency plans.

Someone had shot off a weapon.

Liam looked around wildly, cold seeping into his very being as he searched frantically to make sure that Alice was still safe.

She was nowhere to be seen.

There was, however, another of Liam’s targets standing at the top of the stairs with a satisfied grin on his face and a – literally – smoking gun in his hand.

What?

It hit him all at once, time speeding up as the man beneath his knees shoved Liam aside easily and kicked him as he fell bonelessly to the hardwood floor.  Fire blossomed hot and agonizingly in his chest, sending stabbing pains outward like they were searching for better targets.  He could imagine heated tendrils racing along his veins and encompassing him fully even as he struggled back to his hands and knees.  Alice still needed him; he couldn’t give in now.

Alice!  Where was Alice?  Was she safe? Had she gotten a call out?  Was she-

No.  No, they wouldn’t have gone to all this trouble if she was-

And then he saw her, half hidden under a tablecloth at the end of the hallway, shaking and rocking, her wide eyes locked on his. She’d seen him get-

He needed to move.  Liam needed to get up and get between her and the bastards intent on taking her.  He needed to protect her until he no longer had breath to do so.

But his needs and his body’s demands didn’t – couldn’t – agree, and Liam found himself collapsed in a heap in his brother’s hallway once more, the fire being erased alarmingly quickly by full body shivers and pervasive cold.  His limbs refused to listen to his commands to push, to lever him up, to give himself over to instinct and just keep going.

BANG!

Liam’s eyes shot open, unsure of when they’d closed, but he was no more able to get up than he had been a moment ago and now the scene in front of him had-

God, he hoped he’d drifted into a nightmare.

Alice, his brave little niece, was standing in the hallway now, her feet set apart and square, a look of pure determination that was definitely a Jones family trait in her eyes.  And her arms raised, one of Killian’s guns steady in her little hands, pointed at the man lying dead on the floor next to Liam.

“Alice,” he croaked, his voice painfully weak. “Run!”

Alice shook her head ‘no’, determination fueling her as she pointed the weapon behind him.

A second too late.

Liam felt the barrel of the gun pushed against his temple and begged her again to put the gun down and flee.

“Now, now, now, girlie,” the bastard admonished.  “Put that down before you hurt someone else.”

“I’ll shoot you!” she cried, shuffling her feet to adjust her aim.  “My Papa taught me how.”

The man laughed and Liam’s heart sunk.  He could feel the beats slowing, the warmth of the blood pooling under his chest increasing even as he felt the chill taking over.  He didn’t have long.

“If you shoot me, I’ll shoot your uncle first.  Do you want to kill your Uncle Liam, Alice?”

You bastard! Liam thought furiously, trying to muster the strength to move.

Alice shook her head, the point of the gun faltering slightly. “Don’t hurt him,” she begged.

Oh, honey, I’m already gone, Liam thought sadly, wanting to do anything to erase that tone of voice from his memory.

“Give me a reason not to,” the man taunted, cocking the pistol in Liam’s ear and making Alice take a step forward.

“No, stop!” she shouted, one hand falling away from the gun and raising in supplication.  “What if… what if I come with you?”

“Alice, no!” Liam whispered, too far gone now to shout. She couldn’t… not for him. Not when it wouldn’t matter in a few minutes anyway.

But Alice ignored him, still speaking to the man who would be her kidnapper.  “What if you leave him alone and I come with you?  I heard you; you were looking for me.  I’ll come with you and you leave him alone.”

Tears coursed down Liam’s cheeks and he didn’t have the strength to stop them.  He wasn’t worth this.

“I’ll leave him alone. You just put down the gun, Alice, and we’ll go-”

“No!” Alice shouted, both hands back on the gun now.  “If I put it down, you’ll just kill him now.  I’ll give you the gun when we’re outside.”

God, no!  Alice, please… please.

“Smart girl,” the man crooned.  “All right. We’ll go, before your daddy gets here and ruins the fun.  But if you try anything, we’ll come back and we’ll take your uncle apart piece by piece. Deal?”

Alice glared at the man, but then let her gaze flit down to Liam where he lay on his belly on the floor. He shook his head ‘no’, begging her to run, to shoot, to do anything but go with these men.

“Deal.”

Liam couldn’t do anything but watch as she marched past the men, gun trained on each of them as she passed. She knelt down next to him and patted him gently on the head before leaning down and kissing his forehead much like he’d done earlier that night when he’d put her to bed.  “I love you, Unca Liam,” she whispered, falling back on the old utterance of his name that she’d grown out of.

He wanted to tell her he loved her, too.  He wanted to tell her he was sorry.  He wanted to protect her.

He’d give up his life to protect her.

But he couldn’t even do that, left bleeding out on the hallway floor, his face pressed against a picture of Alice, Killian, and Liam all with gaudy Christmas bows stuck to their foreheads.  Liam had attached his brother’s with superglue.

It was the last thing he saw before the darkness claimed him, cold and alone in an empty house – his family’s home.

@killian-whump @gilliangrissom @gusenitsaa @pirate-owl @nothingimpossibleonlyimprobable @ladyciaramiggles @cocohook38 @nonnyj @queen-mabs-revenge @eala-captian @crystalyte @kmomof4 @killianmesmalls​ @whumptober2018

#whumptober #whumptober 2018 #alice jones #liam jones #whump #my fic #one shot #whumptober ff #the darling affair #where the lovelight gleams

[my-sea-of-stars]

The thing was that I sat in bed in the dullest moment in a few months as I curled up in the comfort of my bed, I honestly felt like I couldn’t climb out of the hole that I had got into. The worst thing about me was that I always retreated into the back of my head when something was bothering me and my girlfriend knew that herself. 

My girlfriend tried to calm me down and even tried to encourage me to get out of bed because she was most certainly a walking saint. I tried everything which even involved me sitting down at my computer and playing video games but sadly not receiving any satisfaction from it. I was devastated. I began to feel nothing as I was beyond annoyed with myself and my girlfriend ended up giving me space and she even ended up stating how she was coming to visit me but how it got cancelled. 

I wasn’t mad because I could understand that she couldn’t come and even though I wanted to see her, I’d have to accept that. My girl told me that we should go for a walk together because at least we were doing something together. She kept insisting and I was so tempted to not go but I knew that I’d feel a little better when I was out in the weather. It was a sunny day in typical Ireland and by that I mean, it rarely was sunny. I wore simple clothes as I finally put a collar on my dog and put a lead on. 

I listened to my music as I wandered the streets of Dublin as my girlfriend called me so we could be closer. She teased me as she was off walking her own dog at the same time which was most certainly gay but sure look, deal with it. I was beyond grumpy and my girlfriend was trying to perk me up. I could hear the heavy wind in her background and her mumbling to her dog. I constantly rolled my eyes as she began to giggle and tease me as she explained ‘I'm her with you, it’s literally the same’ and then decided that she’d chuckle and preach how she was ‘There with me’ and explained ‘Babe, you are totally fine.’ I walked with my slow as ass dog as he panted even though I didn’t know if I could consider him as a dog because he looked like a sheep.

 My girlfriend suddenly yelled down the microphone ‘I see a plane! Do you!” I suddenly looked up as I rolled my eyes and went ‘Yeah’ and she responded ‘What colour is it? Mines Green’ I looked up to the green plane as I suddenly sighed and explained how mine was green too. I walked towards the Park as I stood outside as I began to read the times so I knew when it would close because I had no idea how I’d get my dogs fat ass over the fence. 

I began to walk into the park as I made eye contact with a couple and offered them a smile as they looked behind me with a stare as I shrugged it off. I suddenly felt something grab me as my body went into automatic shock as I couldn’t move, I grasped my phone before I was staring at my girlfriend who was suppose to be in the countryside but instead, she was in front of me. That familiar smile that I had fallen hopelessly in love with me was here and on front of me. I didn’t know what to say or do and instead, I just stared at her in thought. She gave me that childish grin that I had found home in as I didn’t know what to say or do about the fact that she was here. 

I was almost shocked but I couldn’t react as my dog ended up being surprised at her showing up. She wore her famous leather jacket which I loved dearly as we walked through the park as she chuckled and explained how she was here for a while and was waiting on me. That girl could make my heart swore with a click of her fucking fingers. We walked through the streets as I explained how we can drop her stuff off at my house and go back to the shops. 

We ended up getting told by a seven year old to get off the road for our own safety which was..nice? We got into the cabin as we put her stuff down and I lightly kissed her lips that I was missing terribly. She was like my own personal drug that I just couldn’t seem to get enough of in any way possible. She was my beautiful girlfriend who I loved so very much and I couldn’t help but love her more than I already did. We walked down to the shop so we could purchase vape for my mother and my girlfriend got the brilliant idea that she’d end up going in and getting food and cooking it from scratch. 

I wasn’t impressed with the idea because I genuinely didn’t know how this would go. We brought the food back as my grandmother was more than happy to have her in the kitchen to be the Chef for the night. We got into the heat as I made her a cup of coffee which she instantly didn’t like and explained ‘You are like my mother!’ which she then showed me how to make the coffee that she liked. She liked a black coffee with three teaspoons of sugar which I had to admit was good. 

I got her a small pan as she put oil on it before adding salt as it fizzled due to the intense heat. She put a burger on it before I watched her began to cook this burger as everytime I moved, she insisted on me sitting down. I made myself a cup of tea and then decided to make myself another when she declared how I had given her the wrong pan and it wasn’t cooked through.

I felt instant regret as she explained that she’d just have the waffles but I decided to get a better pan and hand it to her which she allowed me to shift the burger and finally allowed me to wrap my arms around her waistline as I kissed her neck lightly. She sat at the table when she was done as she handed me waffles which I wasn’t use to people cooking for me so I didn’t know how to react. My girlfriend loves Ketchup so I continued to push it towards her as she sighed and added more. 

Once we finished, she ended up washing the dishes and I dried them. She put her phone into a pot to enhance the volume of the music that filled the kitchen. It was a night of cooking, cleaning and the fire alarm going off once that I ended up fucking it out the back garden. We made the place spotless before we waddled back out into the cabin which we ended up enjoying our night together which was full of the bed sheets shifting and the heated breaths. During the entire process, we decided to watch Friends even if I was ‘Misty eyed’ and snuggly over it. 

She didn’t go to college that day and I didn’t attend school, we had a ‘us’ day. We snuggled up in bed together as I allowed her to wrap her arms around me as I felt safe when I was with her. She made me feel grounded when I felt like sometimes I’d just float away and never come back. I fell asleep together and for once, we slept soundly. She ended up waking me up even though I continuously fell asleep when I was laying on her chest. She constantly tried to wake me up and I refused but finally, she seen my mood was dropping. 

She gave me a long talk as she spoke to me about serious matters. I confirmed it before she ended up writing rules and guidelines before we went into the kitchen as she made me eat breakfast as I made her coffee before we went back outside. My sisters ended up making a show of me as usual but my girlfriend really made an effort with them even if they are literally pains in the asses. 

My girlfriend went to get chips and ended up coming back with popcorn for my sisters which just made my heart drop as she was being a sweetheart. She took a nap after my sister said fifty ‘Your momma jokes’ to my girlfriend. My girlfriend joked along with her and ended up snuggling into me and enjoying her day with my sisters who were insane. We went from a walk after as we needed to get out for a while, The sky turned pink in a way that would make you stop in your tracks. The primrose tone that was hidden under the passing clouds was a dream.

 My girl teased me on the bridge as she was afraid of heights and needed help down. She decided to race me home as she took a different route. I fixed the bed as she got back and began to do her assignment. She was frustrated as she put her music in and even though I was doing nothing beside watching Youtube. I decided to go over and help her fill out certain information whilst she lay on the bed and groaned about doing it. 

We were suppose to watch a film but didn’t have time for it due to being occupied with something else which of course, I didn’t mind. I fell asleep safely in her arms again that night and woke up to the obnoxious buzzing of my phone as I snuggled into her side and got absolutely frustrated that I had to see the girl I love, leave.

 I kissed her softly as she gave me her fuck boy nod when she was leaving which I smiled and rolled my eyes.

I honestly don’t believe that it’s ever going to get easier watching the girl I love walk away from me.

#mine #me #personal #my observations #observation #lgbt #dates #my dates #my baby #my girl #writing #writing of mine #writing of tumblr #my writing

[thisblogisdead4good]

The Wolves Among Us (Jerome x OC) - Chapter 28

Chapter Warnings: Mentions of abuse, Mentions of depression, Mentions of alcoholism, smut

Chapter One / Previous Chapter / Next Chapter

Amelia was restless, having spent far too long confined to one room – virtually shackled to the very bed that she found herself burrowed into still – and yet she lacked the motivation to leave it and relinquish its comfort in favor of progress. The very idea of climbing out from beneath the covers and resuming her life was daunting, especially when she considered that she was currently in the midst of what would certainly be remembered to her as being potentially one of the worst chapters of her entire life...that, of course, being under the assumption that she would somehow manage to survive it. She had, after all, taken the one person whom she had known – beyond the shadow of a doubt – cared for her and her well-being and turned that person against her; she was truly all alone now, save for whatever possible kindness the slumbering madman beside her might decide to bestow upon her. She was not sure exactly how many days had come and gone since she had awoken in the bitter cold bathwater that Jerome had dumped her in, but it seemed that every time she had opened her eyes since then, she felt just the smallest bit stronger. She could feel the fog clear from her mind, becoming brighter and more alert as time passed and her body healed itself.

Rolling onto her side, she winced just slightly as a dull ache throbbed where her wound had once been before she pulled her eyes across the ginger's unconscious form. His naked chest rose and fell as he slept, his face turned away from her as she watched him. As with the first time that she had seen him exposed in this way, she could not help but to notice the numerous scars that marred his snow-white skin – there were a few small, circular ones that dotted his arms and a similar one on his chest, which Amelia could only assume were the result of cigarette burns, and a slew of others - the causes of which being extremely difficult to determine. There was one mark in particular, however, that caught the girl's eye – it was located at his front, just a couple of inches beneath his rib cage on his left side; it was a long, somewhat jagged looking line, not entirely dissimilar to the one that she had worn before Jerome had cauterized it.

"Shhh, I know, I know...I've been there – trust me, I know it sucks. Just try to relax."

His words from that night pushed to the forefront of her mind, echoing inside of her head and causing a pang to rip through Amelia's chest. He had told her that his mother had been an abusive, wretch of a woman – which was something that she understood all too well – but for one reason or another, being face to face with the evidence of what he had been through now bothered her in a way that it hadn't quite before. It caused her to consider, for a moment, how very lucky she was that she was at least spared the torment of having to carry around a physical reminder of what she had endured. Without even thinking, the girl reached out a hand and just barely grazed the tips of her fingers over the boys skin, tracing over the faded mark at his front.

“Hm?” The boy stirred, groggily lifting his head as he peeled his lids open the smallest amount, “Wazzup? Ya need somethin'?”

Amelia smiled, finding his sleepy, slurred speech kind of endearing.

“You've been stabbed before?” She asked softly.

“Mm, yeah,” He huffed as he shifted his weight on the mattress and turned his head to face her, blinking a few times, “Mom got me with some glass once – no big deal. Hurt like a son of a bitch though. Why?”

The girl shrugged her shoulders.

“Just was wondering,” She whispered, acting as though that revelation had not bothered her, though even Jerome - being only half awake - could sense that it had.

“Yeah...never was much of a nurturer, my mom...though I suppose she did manage to keep me alive long enough for me to – well...you know -”

“Kill her?”

“Yup,” He confirmed proudly, a lazy grin sliding across his face.

“Jesus,” Amelia replied with a smirk, landing a playful, half-hearted swat on his chest before turning serious, “I'm sorry you had to go through that, though...that's fucked up.”

“Fucking Christ, Amelia,” Jerome groaned as he rolled his eyes, “You keep sayin' shit like that and I'm gonna staple your fuckin' mouth shut. Understand?”

She bobbed her head and did what she could to suppress a laugh, again mildly surprised at how comfortable she felt with this man, even when he was actively threatening to harm her.

“Yes, sir,” She said, tucking a chunk of crimson hair behind her ear, “It's just...my mom wasn't exactly the nurturing type either, but it was never, ever anything like that. I can't even fucking imagine if she had ever tried to come at me or Warren like that. I don't know what I would have done.”

“Oooh, you've got mommy issues, too, do ya?” The redhead stretched out his arm and hooked it around Amelia's shoulders, pulling her in closer as he purred his next words to her with a devilish grin, “Why don'tcha tell your ol' pal Jerome all about it, huh?”

The girl shifted next to him, carefully snuggling into his side as she tilted her head up to face him. He was warm and smelled like soap. She pondered once more about how strange this boy was – a lunatic covered in blood and dirt and cackling manically in one instant, and a calm, angel-faced boy the next...though she reasoned that even in spite of his pleasant demeanor, she could still definitely sense the darkness within him.

“C'mon, doll,” He encouraged softly, leaning in so that the tip of his nose grazed against hers, “What'd she do to ya?”

He did not allow her the opportunity to answer him immediately, as his lips brushed against hers in a slow, cautious manner before he pulled back and bit down on his bottom lip, awaiting her response.

Amelia swallowed thickly, allowing her eyes to flit across Jerome's face.

“She, uhm...,” She paused, suddenly finding her mind clouded, “She was just...mean, ya know? Like, she was fine when I was younger but after Warren was born she just...she became depressed and when they tried to put her on medication, she didn't wanna take it...and so she started drinking and I mean, she'd always say that she did it because it made her feel better but I don't know about any of that 'cause all I remember is that she'd be sitting there at the table or on the couch or where ever, drunk off her ass and she'd still be crying and she'd still be angry. So...I dunno. Didn't seem like it ever did much good for her – definitely didn't do any good for us. We'd still have to hear to her scream and cry day in and day out, or watch her lay on the couch for weeks at a time in silence...we still had to listen to all of the hateful shit that she would say about us to our father...and like, after a while it just kind of became background noise to me but it bothered Warren to no end...it never stopped bothering Warren, like he thought it was his fault or something.”

    The man bobbed his head softly in acknowledgment, his lips forming a tight line as he racked his brain for an appropriate response.

“That's rough,” He stated lowly, allowing his hand to trace circular patterns against her back.

“Yeah, well,” She started, clearing her throat and lowering her eyes to the old burn mark on his chest, “Coulda been a lot worse.”

“Mm...so, what happened to her?”

“Hm?”

“Your mom. You keep referring to her in the past tense and, I'm no detective but, if I had to guess, I'd say that the old bats uhh, not around anymore – right?”

Amelia bit down lightly at the inside of her cheek before she nodded.

“Yeah. She died. Alcohol poisoning. Choked to death on her own vomit.”

She was almost startled by the boys laughter, wincing as the sound thundered throughout the room. Wiping at his eyes as he started to calm down, he turned to face her.

“Sorry, toots, but ya gotta admit...that's pretty good,” He giggled.

“Yeah, very poetic.”

“That can't be it, though – I mean, there's gotta be more to the story, right? Or is it just that you assume that little brother is upset with you for not having protected him better when you were children?”

Amelia sighed.

“No...I already told you once before that I kind of abandoned him and the rest of my family.”

“Right,” The boy nodded, “And was this before or after you lost your mom?”

“After.” “Then I don't see where the issue is there – the bitch was dead in the ground, he still had his father -”

“It's an issue,” The girl interrupted tersely, “Because about a year or so after Valarie – our mom – died, our father nearly died in the same. Exact. Way. He didn't quite know how to cope after she was gone and even though you'd think that the fucker would have known better, he started drinking, too. I was at work when Warren called and told me he wouldn't wake up...so I raced over there just in time to watch the paramedics loading our father into the back of an ambulance. Warren was in there with him...he was so scared. Crying. It broke my heart to see him. I don't remember exactly what the paramedic said, but the gist of it was that he was looking pretty rough and he wasn't sure how things would shake out...then he asked if I wanted to ride along with my father and brother to the hospital. I don't remember answering or if I even did...I remember Warren screaming out for me as took off running...and that's it.”

Jerome was silent for a while, staring at the wall just beyond Amelia's shoulder before he inhaled deeply and shifted his body so that his front was angled towards her. Reaching up, he caressed the side of her face, gently running the side of his thumb back and forth across her skin.

“That was pretty cold, sweetheart,” He murmured, “But your pops did what he did, and that ain't on you.”

“Right, but how I reacted to it? That is. That is entirely on me.”

“You were a kid,” The ginger countered, “And you'd already lost one parent and ya thought you were gonna lose the other one the same way. I know I'm not exactly the 'go-to' guy for these kinds of things, but I imagine that that'd send just about anybody through the ringer.”

“Yeah, but...I mean, I wasn't a kid, Jerome. I wasn't. This was – Christ – about five years ago already. I was twenty years old then. Older than you are now. Warren, though...Warren was a kid. And he needed his fucking sister, and I ran from him.”

The boy shook his head lightly.

“Yeah, yeah, okay – look, ya did a real shitty thing, toots. I'll give ya that much, but it feels like you're blamin' yourself for the stupid shit that your dad did after your ma bit the dust and no matter how much you wanna sit there and pretend like that's on you, it ain't. It had nothin' to do with anything that you did -  the guy made his own decision, just like your mom did and they're the ones that are responsible for the fallout of that – not you.”

The corner of Amelia's lips pulled up into a tiny, half-smile as she considered his words. He could certainly talk a lot of sense for someone so...deranged. She wondered if he'd still offer her the same level of kindness if he knew the whole truth about what had happened. Certainly not, she supposed, because how could he possibly even try to make the argument that it wasn't her fault once he had all of the facts? He was right to say that it hadn't been anything that she had done, but what the boy failed to realize was that sometimes, it's what you fail to do that is the most damning. Every time you see ugliness and injustice, every time you see someone in need of help and keep your head down or turn the other cheek...those, too, are actions. They count. And for someone in need, they can make all of the difference in the world. She considered for a moment how badly the man before her could have used someone like that. Someone who cared, someone who would have refused to look the other way while he was being berated and abused. Just one person. That's all it might have taken. It hurt to think about it.

Raking her eyes over the boys face, Amelia smiled sweetly, admiring his freckles and his sleepy eyes before leaning in and kissing him. She had intended it to be a small, sentimental sort of gesture, but as her warm lips gently pressed against his, she found it incredibly difficult to pull herself away, opting instead to push further. Deepening their kiss, the girl carefully moved, repositioning herself so that she sat atop of him, one leg at either side of him as she felt his hot, wet tongue push past her lips – he smoothed his hands up her thighs before coming to rest and gripping at the curve of her hips. Pulling back just slightly, Amelia studied Jerome's face, finding his breathing to be somewhat labored and his pupils blown. The pair merely stared at one another for a moment, the man swallowing thickly as he waited to see what she would do, a grin taking form as he watched her lean forward once more to claim him, taking his inaction as permission to continue. She pushed softly against his mouth, tasting and caressing him as though he were made of the sweetest substance on Earth rather than of blood and madness – in spite of the hot, pulsating need that she could feel building inside of her, Amelia made it a point to remain gentle with him, reasoning that if anybody could stand to benefit from just the smallest amount of tenderness, it was Jerome.

Allowing her head to fall gently to the side, the girl gingerly brushed her mouth against the skin of his neck, sucking softly as her trembling hands moved downward, slipping beneath the elastic band of his boxers as she cautiously began to slide them down his body. She heard him make a small, amused sound and could practically feel him smirking above her as he shifted himself, aiding her so that she could expose him fully.

“Oooh, feeling better, are we?” He teased darkly, reaching beneath her over-sized T-shirt and gripping at the side of her panties before harshly dragging them from her body.

Using one hand to angle himself, he shifted so that he sat upright as he wrapped his other arm around Amelia's waist to steady her, surprised when she planted her small hand against his chest, signaling for him to stop. Reaching down, the girl removed his arm from around her and instead placed her hand in his, studying his face before leaning in and kissing him once more, slowly allowing herself to fall as she did. The boy rubbed himself against her, delighting in the feeling of her wet heat against him and the quiet, desperate sounds his actions elicited from her – his torment was cut short, however, as Amelia lowered herself onto him, taking him inside of her body just slightly and causing the air to catch in both of their throats.        

Gripping his hand tightly, the girl worked herself onto him slowly, moving her hips and taking him in gradually, feeling her walls stretch to accommodate his girth as her mouth fell open from the overwhelming sensation. In spite of the ache the throbbed within her, she persisted, descending further and further until he was completely sheathed inside of her. Her breathing having become shallow, Amelia flicked her eyes up to Jerome, watching as his green orbs roamed over her body before coming to rest on her face. He let out a light, quivering sigh before grasping at the hem of her shirt and carefully lifting it up, removing it and leaving her form exposed to him.

“Better?” She asked playfully.

“Much,” He growled, shifting forward as he dipped his head down and captured her nipple with his mouth, sucking and toying with it using his tongue.

Amelia let out a muffled cry, one hand gripping Jerome's as the other reached around to his back, her fingernails lightly digging in to the skin of his shoulder blade. Her head fell back as he continued his ministrations and she began to move on top of him, rising and falling gently and rolling her hips into him. The boy pulled back, leaning so that the back of his head rested against the wall behind them as he simply watched her pleasure herself with his body, looking at her as though it were the most beautiful sight he'd ever seen. He did, however, notice a small flash of pain cross her features as she took him.

Tilting his head, the boy reached up and gently cupped the girl's face, drawing her attention back to him.

“Does it hurt, princess?” He breathed, his tongue darting out to whet his lips.

Biting down on her lower lip, Amelia bobbed her head a small amount.

“A little.”

Jerome groaned, bringing the hand that held hers up to his face and planting a small, wet kiss onto it.

“We could try another -” He began, but the girl shook her head.

“No.”

She began to work herself harder on top of him, continuing to rise and fall, soft whimpers and moans falling from her lips as she moved until ultimately, she could feel her release nearing. She took him in completely and ground herself against him, reveling in the way that he filled her as her walls seized around him and she cried out, utterly unconcerned of who might hear it.

“Ugh, fuck,” The redhead murmured, feeling her tighten and cum around him.

Bringing himself forward, he once again wrapped his arm around the girl's waist to steady her as she leaned in, resting her head against his shoulder for support as he began to piston himself into her, setting a much faster, more aggressive pace than what Amelia had used with him. Allowing his eyes to drift closed, the boy continued to thrust into her mercilessly, nuzzling his face against her cheek and peppering soft kissed across her skin.

“Ah, shit,” He gasped, feeling his orgasm approaching.

He tightened his hold on Amelia's hand, gritting his teeth as he felt the cold metal of her wedding ring press against his fingers. It was strange, but Jerome found that in that moment, the very presence of that ring made him furious. He didn't know why...but it did, and so, with a low, dangerous growl he harshly twisted the ring from her finger and hurled it across the room. Placing a hand at either side of the girl's head, Jerome raised her up to force her to face him – he stared into her eyes for a moment as he continued to fuck her, watching the pleasure cross her features before he captured her lips ferociously with his own – biting and sucking at her, claiming her before he felt his release hit. He cursed loudly as he felt his cock twitch inside of her, his seed gushing and filling the woman before him.

They remained in that position for a while – Amelia straddling Jerome – their foreheads pressed together as they both worked to catch their breath. Ultimately, the lunatic let out a deep breath and cleared his throat.

“Not that I ain't, uhhh...appreciative or anythin' doll but, what the hell was that?” He inquired, a small laugh in his voice.        

Amelia smiled, a light chuckle rumbling from her chest.

“Suppose I just wanted to say thank you, ya know?”

“Yeah? What for?”

“I dunno – not killing me? Not letting Abbie kill me? Getting me drugs and not letting me die? Guess you could take your pick at this point, so...thank you.”

The boy grinned widely, a mischievous gleam in his eyes.

“Don't mention it.”  

A/N: Hey guys! I know it's been a long time since my last update. I'm sorry about that – I recently got a new job and while I'm excited and feel like it will be a much better fit for me and open my schedule up significantly to be able to do more things (like write), it's also stirred up my anxiety a bit and caused some issues there. I'm sure I've mentioned it before in previous author notes (Can't be certain, though, as I do tend to ramble on in these things, I know), but I have Clinical Anxiety (or chronic – however you'd like to say it, I suppose) and I recently had a very, very bad panic attack and had to go to the hospital as my meds weren't working and it simply wouldn't subside no matter what I (or my friends) tried. I'm not trying to make excuses or anything, I just kind of wanted to give you guys a heads up for where I'm at and why it's taken me so long to get this to you – for those of you that care and are reading this and really enjoy this story, I'm really sorry for leaving ya hanging for so long, and so I felt like I should at least give an explanation...if that makes sense. It wasn't my intention to go like, a month, without updating and for that, again, I apologize – I hope that you liked this update and that it was at least somewhat worth the wait. As always, I apologize for any errors I may have missed while proofreading and if you would be so kind, **I would really, really love to hear from you guys. It makes my heart so happy.**  And I could probably benefit from some encouragement, or social interaction of any kind, tbh. Anyways, Thanks again!

#jerome valeska #jerome valeska fanfiction #jerome valeska x oc #jerome gotham #gotham #gotham fanfiction #gotham joker #jerome valeska imagine #jerome valeska smut

[janesnotes]

Pillow Talk

Jane: +I barely remember the ride back to my apartment. Once Belle gave me the ok to leave, Vishous all but scooped me up and cavemanned me out to the waiting suped up Escalade. He barked out to his “brother” to turn the music down and gave him my address. How he knew my address in the first place was a concern to me but I was too tired to ask. Once inside the vehicle, he didn't strap me in. No, instead I had my own personal seatbelt and airbag that was his rock hard body and strong arms. His scent filled my nostrils and I had to make a mental note of what cologne he wore. Next thing I knew he was carrying me up to my apartment and tucking me in bed, careful of my ribs. I mumbled out some words of thanks, at least I thought I did and let the exhaustion finally take me.+ V: [Cop didn't ask when I gave him Jane's address. He knew me well enough to know not to question. He didn't even adjust the rearview mirror when I tucked Jane on my lap. My arms and body were the protection her human frame needed] You will be home soon. [I spoke low near her ear while she brushed her cheek against my chest. That simple motion had me choking back a growl as Cop sped like a mofo through town until pulling to a stop outside her apartment. I shift her on my lap enough to open the door then the first of my shit kickers hit the concrete sidewalk with Jane steady in my arms] Back in 10. [Cop nods his head and motions towards the apartment building with his eyes then leaned back against the Escalade. I didn't think twice about his expression as I carried Jane inside and up to her apartment. Carefully I get her settled on her bed to hear a half mumbled “thank you” pass her lips. /Damn/, I muttered under my breath when my eyes fall on those oh so fucking perfect lips of hers just begging to be caressed. It takes all the willpower I have not to follow through, but instead I kiss her forehead. I knew I'd be watching over her though she'd be clueless that I was even there. I turn around and start towards the door with a part of me wanting to stay and a greater part wanting to keep her with me where I knew she'd be safe] Jane: +Somewhere in my concussed mind, I heard a voice telling me to say “stay”. I'm not a damn dog I thought to myself. “Ask him to stay”. Alright. Belle must have given me some strong drugs if I'm hearing voices now. I rolled over so I was facing the door and pried my heavy lids open, just barely making out the tall, dark figure standing by it. Any woman in her right mind should be afraid to have a man she barely knows in her room. Especially one dressed in all black and has a tattoo around his eye. Yet I couldn't feel safer.+ Please stay with me. I don't want to be alone. +My voice sounded like I was chewing on gravel, or smoked a pack of cigarettes every day and I wasn't totally sure I spoke coherently but there, I said stay.+ V: [I turned around when I heard her sheets rustling as she moved and damned if my heart didn't jump directly up into my throat when she asked me to stay] I'll stay until you are asleep and all is well. [I moved slowly searching for anywhere to sit but on the bed. Her scent was already making it hard to not touch her and getting closer to her only intensified that reaction. I had to delve deep into my psyche to find the strength to put a strangle hold on what I wanted to do and focus on just being in the same room with her. I sat where there was space for my large body to fit and that happened to be beside her thigh. I tucked the sheet back around her and found a growl forming at the sight of how perfectly the sheet hugged her every curve drawing my eyes up her body putting this instant to memory] Jane: +A small sigh of content passed through my parched lips when I felt the slight dip of the bed. Something about this man calmed me like nothing I have ever known, his voice soothing my tired soul+ Why….why did you save me? Why not just dump me at the hospital and go on your way? +As tired as I was and my body protesting keeping awake, I wanted to do the whole “get to know you” thing. + And FYI, I don't normally have men in my bed on the first date, but I will make an exception for you, being you saved my life and all. +I laughed and grimaced at the same time. Pain hitting my ribs with the chuckle. I need to talk to Belle about these meds she gave me. We need them at the hospital.+ V: [watching her fight her own body’s need to sleep and heal I can't help but to feel the tiniest smile curve one side of my set lips upwards. She was a fighter down to her core and that made me want to know more about the alluring female stretched out beside me. Checking my cell for word from Cop that he was back from making a slow search of the surrounding area to find he had decided to expand the search grid then would move back in towards her apartment building. That meant limited time but I'd use all I had just to be near her for now] It's what I do. [I didn't go into the fact that when it comes to her that I'd move the very forces of nature to see she was safe. I knew that fact for my inner voice screamed it at me. I had never reacted to anyone, save Cop and he is my best friend, like I did Jane and that sent a perplexing anxiety coursing my veins. I wasn't good enough for her nor would I ever claim to be, but I'd damn well make sure she knew she meant something even if this could never be] Jane: So you have a savior complex? +I moved closer to him, my legs now touching his and my hand reaching towards him. It was like my body craved being close to him.+ It's late. And like I said, I really don't want to be alone. Why don't you lay down and catch some sleep. I promise not to get frisky or to bite. +Where this bravado came from I had no clue but at this point I figured but to go with it. + V: [looking at the tiny digital clock I knew I could only stay a short while. Her apartment wasn't prepped for my staying too long. The sun would be rising and she'd be greeted by the sight of a deep fried me. She didn't know what I was, but I did. And that meant keeping her from it. Out of harms way or the reach of those my kind hunt to keep her and other humans safe] No savior complex. I'd never claim that honor for it's not me. I just do what I must to keep people safe. [easing myself back against a pillow I allow myself to stretch out. A part of me needed this closeness and this woman was driving me to the edge of my control, but I had to. Nay I needed to be close to her] Jane: Why would you want to keep me safe? I don't even know you. +I watch him stretch out like he owned the place and instinctively laid my head on his chest, the rhythm of his heart calming me.+ Where is your car? And why didn't you just drive me to your friend's clinic? I'm babbling I know. You can tell me to shut my trap anytime. V: [diamondlike eyes stare at her when she rolls over and lays her head on my chest. I hadn't expected that or maybe I had given how my cock reacted by stretching my leathers over my crotch until there was a nice ache involved. “Shit this female is something else”, is what crosses my arm as I instinctively curl an arm around her helping her shift closer while willing the lights to dim] No need to overthink this, Jane. You rest and get your strength back. Feel me? That is what's important. Jane: +This man wasn't the chatty type, which was normally fine by me but for some reason I wanted to know more about him. However sleep was finally claiming me. My lids were heavy as I let out a yawn. Snuggling closer to this man, I placed a soft kiss on his chest and surrendered to slumber+

[girlmeetsminter]

under appreciated

prompt: in which y/n is joking around with simon and he takes what you say the wrong way.

warnings: a swear or two

notes: sorry this is so rushed and unedited, just wanted to say a huge thank you for 100 followers 💕💕

___________________________________________

“simon” my small voice echoes throughout the halls of the sidemen house.

i didn’t live here, but sometimes i wonder if i did would my boyfriend actually want to spend more time with me. i spent a lot of my free time in the presence of simon, but i can’t say that the same necessarily goes for him.

if he’s not found recording, he’s editing, and even when that’s finished he’ll be perfecting thumbnails and rendering stuff.

“in here” he responds evidentially not moving from his desk. not that i would have expected any different.

“just me” i peep my head in the door to see if i’m disturbing him from anything. “i got you some lunch” gesturing to the sandwich made only minutes earlier.

“you didn’t have to do that” he’s still yet to take his eyes away from the current video he’s working on. typical, i think while sighing.

it’s almost as if he is oblivious to the unhealthy amount of time he spends alone in his room. while he may not physically see his friends, he spends a whole lot of time with them. myself on the other hand have to work into his schedule.

my unintentional sigh allows me to receive the full attention of my boyfriend as he reluctantly swivels away from his computer screen. “what did you make?” he says with a cheeky smile, showing that although I didn’t have to make him anything, he’ll still willingly accept it.

“nothing exciting” i wave my hand dismissing his question. “but um- does that mean you’re taking a break?”

“ugh, well i wasn’t really planning on. but i can take a few minutes out if you’d like.”

that being the only invitation i need, i plop myself on his bed. “you’re cute you know?” he smiles at me taking a bite of his sandwich before placing it down on the desk.

“well i must have one real lucky boyfriend then” i answer with a placid smile.

“yeah you must. i suppose he’s rather attractive too?” he replies.

i pretend to think about it for a moment while laying back onto the duvet. it doesn’t take long for simon to react to my teasing as his fingers lightly begin to tickle my sides.

“okay, okay! i guess your somewhat attractive” emphasising the somewhat. my answer clearly not being the right one, as the torture endure from simon’s fingers continued.

“i give up, you’re attractive simon!” realising that i did just scream that rather loudly i immediately clamp my hand over my mouth.

“good, and now the whole house knows it” the cocky grin already etched onto his face.

“you’re such a goofball” i say whilst attempting to push him away from me.

“well then why do you keep coming over here to spend time with a goofball, hey?” his mouth presses to the spot interconnecting my neck and jawline.

nine times out of ten my reaction to him would have been absolute pleasure. for some reason today i’m slightly annoyed at the lack of time simon and I have spent together. particularly in the last few weeks, which results in my honest thoughts to unravel themselves.

“i’m not really sure either..it’s not like this goofball spends anytime with me when i’m here” annoyance evident in my tone.

within an instant simon retracts from my neck and looks down at me with sad eyes.

“is that what you think of me? someone who hardly cares about you? or doesn’t have time with you?”

“no simon that’s not what i meant at all” he moves further away from me standing up and pacing the room.

“great just another thing i’ve fucked up” his voice becoming more aggressive by each syllable.

“babe calm down you haven’t fucked anything up” even with such sincerity the words don’t get through to him.

“listen y/n, my life isn’t all sunshine and roses. it’s hard work, a lot of hard work. not only do i need to be putting good content out frequently, i also have to maintain a good image. you saying that i don’t give you enough attention makes me feel like someone who just uses a girl when he has needs and then tosses her to the side. i’m not that guy y/n! and I don’t have to be with you to think about you, because trust me when i say you’re the only thing on my mind. there’s no balance in my life, if i spend all my time working i’m upsetting you and if i spend all my time with you i’m upsetting millions of people. i can’t win” eventually he stops pacing, he stops yelling and tears begin to run down his face.

“take a deep breath si. you’re taking this all completely the wrong way! i’d be lying if i said i didn’t feel a little ignored at times. but i understand it’s your job, and in no way do i feel used by you. i walked into your life knowing full well all the overtime you do, all’s i’m suggesting is a little break every now and then. for your own sake.”

i stand from the bed and wrap my arms around him. he sobs lightly into my shoulder, his grip tightly around my waist.

he moves back ever so slightly still with his arms firmly holding onto me. he looks for my eyes to make contact, while he takes a shaky hand to press under my chin lifting it up. “i love you y/n, i really do. and i’m sorry if i make you feel under appreciated. you deserve the world, and i’m sorry if i can’t give you that, but i’m trying and i’ll do anything for you. from now on i’m going to include you in everything i do. if you’re here and i’m filming, you can help with the camera work or can even make special appearances in my videos. if you’re here and i’m editing we can put a movie on and snuggle together while i do so. i love you more than anything y/n/n, and i want you to feel the appreciation you deserve.”

very delicately he leans down locking our lips together. in a slow and passionate kiss that shows every part of my body that he appreciates my company.

“i love you too simon” i respond against the warmth of his lips. simon picks me up and throws me over his shoulder, i immediately begin squealing and hitting his back.

“calm down gorgeous, stay here i’ll be right back” he instructs while throwing me onto his mattress.

i here him frantically rushing around the house and i let out a small giggle at how dorky he can be sometimes.

he runs back in with a parcel in hand and lack of oxygen. he stops to catch his breathe before sitting down next to me.

“i know i’m a day early but i feel like after all we’ve been through today you deserve it now” handing over the parcel wrapped with a sloppy bow on top.

he watches me intently with eager eyes as i pull back the pink tissue paper. inside is a beautiful navy blue cocktail dress made entirely of lace.

“what’s this for?” i ask evidently confused with his nice gesture.

“well i figured since tomorrow is our anniversary of when we met i wanted to take you out somewhere nice. it’s a total surprise so don’t ask any questions, but i just wanted to do something for you. i may have even asked freya if she can stay here tonight so we can have your apartment to ourselves” he adds with a wink.

“you remembered that it was our anniversary? you’d been so busy lately with the book, and the tour and your other events i didn’t think you’d be able to take some time off.”

“i feel offended that you think i’d forget the day i met the most prettiest, most intelligent and most kind hearted girl in the world” he says faking a hurt expression. “i remember it like it was yesterday” he nudges my shoulder.

“really?” i ask in awe. “do you think maybe you could recall the story to me?”

“of course my love” he says tangling our legs together as he lays us back into a more comfortable position.

“it was an ordinary tuesday for me, typical video grind type of day. we had a meeting in town about some new merchandise and jj, vik and lewis had all left together. but josh and I had to make a pitstop to grab freya before the meeting. she’d gotten out of class early and was meeting a friend for lunch, so josh promised he’d pick her up so we could all go to the meeting together. we were about 20 minutes earlier on picking frey up than planned so she was no where ready to go when we arrived. ‘sorry boys do you mind waiting on me finishing my lunch i’m starving’, and josh responded with something like ‘no problem at all babe, do you mind if me and simon crash your lunch date though?’ freya had introduced you to me and josh, before the two of them engaged in a deep conversation. this left the two of us to get to know each other until frey was finished. i remember being so nervous at what to say and wondering whether you liked me as much as i liked your personality and your gorgeous looks. i remember freya teasing me the whole car ride about not getting your number and that i’d be begging her for it later. every time josh had to meet freya on campus i’d always ask whether he thought you’d be there, or when he’d get back i’d ask if he’d seen you. it got to the point where him and freya had organised a secret double date which they claim was a coincidence so that we can meet again. and i’m glad that i grew the balls that time to ask for your number, because if i hadn’t i might not be laying here while you peacefully sleeping in my arms” he lightly chuckles pulling the blanket over us and holding me closer than ever.

#miniminter imagines #simonminter #sdmn imagines #sidemen #sidemen imagines