#I sure as hell don’t either

[deadsetobsessions]

REVERSE TROPE WRITING PROMPT BY @out-of-jams

ACCIDENTALLY KIDNAPPING A MAFIA BOSS

In Tucker's defense, he thought he was doing someone a favor. A life saving favor, in fact.

"What the fuck-!” The red helmeted guy yelped as a deceptively strong Tucker yanked him onto the bike and sped away. Before Tucker could explain, the GIW agents behind them got in a lucky shot and hit the helmeted liminal with a strong blast to the head.

Clearly, his gear wasn’t equipped with anti-ecto protections, because the guy slumped over on Tucker’s arms. This was bad, because Tucker now had to maneuver about 230 pounds of Gotham muscle while speeding away from government agents. He flicked on the jammer so they couldn’t track his and red helmets’s ecto signature.

“STOP!”

“Ah, shit.” Tucker cursed as he somehow managed to gather up red-helmet’s body and stabilize the bike. “C’mon, Tuck, you can do this.”

Blasts of anti-ecto tech slammed into buildings around him. Luckily, Gotham was used to this kind of shit so people just moved out of the way before going back to their day. Tucker wove around traffic, trying to lure the agents into slamming face first into some signposts.

“Stop damaging the local infrastructure!” Tucker yelled back at them, speeding up.

“WELL REIMBURSE THE PEOPLE AND THE CITY LATER! TELL US WHERE PHANTOM IS!!”

“Over my dead body, you jerks!” Tucker took a sharp right, catching red helmet before the man could slip off. He sped up and took the ramp downwards, heart beating loudly in his ears as he strained his senses to figure out- ah, they took the ramp upwards. Good. Now, all he has to do is bring red helmet back to home base.

“Oh my god. I kidnapped him,” Tucker groaned, slapping at his face before quickly placing his hands back on the handle bar once the bike teetered over with red helmet’s weight. “I’m a criminal. Oh my god.”

Then, as he found his way back, “…Well, it’s not like I wasn’t a criminal before, with the whole resisting arrest thing.”

——

Tucker dumped the red helmet liminal onto the couch of their shared apartment and went to take a shower. When he got out ten minutes later, he found Danny and Sam staring at the helmet guy. Tucker pushed up his glasses (after letting them defog from the shower) and greeted them.

“Hey, guys! I found him while I was running away from Agent L and J.”

“You okay?” Danny asked, eyes immediately flicking over Tucker for injuries.

“Yeah, I’m good. They’re horrible shots.”

“I thought Danny was the one who brought home strays but you…?” Sam commented, arms crossed and a purple painted nail tapping at her arm. “Wait. Isn’t this… that crime lord? What was his name?”

“Red Hood?” Danny offered, turning back to look at the guy on their couch.

Tucker paled. “Oh, no.”

Guns? Check.

Red Helmet? Check.

Bat-Symbol? Check.

Shit.

They collectively stared at the guy in silence.

“…Tucker,” Sam slowly said. “Did you accidentally kidnap a crime lord?”

“Hey, I didn’t want him to get killed! He’s liminal! Even more than us, except for Danny.” Tucker grumbled. “Man, this is why I leave the hero-ing to Danny. I do one good thing and suddenly I have a crime lord on my couch.”

“My couch,” Sam corrected, as she was the one that furnished their apartment.

“What do we do now?”

“Eat dinner,” Tucker said. “I’m famished.”

Sam nodded. “Wait for him to wake up and hope he doesn’t shoot us the moment he wakes up. Then, we explain.”

Danny grabbed all the visible guns he could see. Tucker went to start dinner. Sam supervised, because her boys were idiots and now she had a crime lord in her apartment.

——

Jason groaned, head swimming in a sea of dull throbbing pain as his eyes fluttered open.

Then he remembered he was abducted, and bolted up right. He paused as a series of quick observations made its way to his consciousness.

One. He’s not tied up. Weird, because everyone knows that he’s a weapon even without his weapons.

Two. His weapons were right there, just in reach.

Three. He was surrounded by teenagers and/or young adults who were all scrolling along on their phones.

“Oh, hey, he’s awake! Hi!” The Wayne bait said, electric blue eyes fixing itself on Jason. “Were you aware you died?”

Jason went rigid, hundreds of way to-

“Danny!” A scolding tone cut of Jason’s immediate panic. Two couch pillows slammed into Danny’s face, courtesy of goth girl and nerdy but strong.

“Dude, why do you start with that? Why are you like this?” His… possible kidnapper? asked, exasperatedly flinging his hands into the air as he rolled his eyes.

Goth girl scowled. “Boys. Crime lord, couch, remember?”

“Hey, in my defense, I died too!”

And that- as Jason remained dumbfounded in this circle of tomfoolery- was what snapped Jason out of his daze.

“You what?” He rasped out.

And when he saw them open their mouths at the same time, Jason just knew his headache was going worse.

——

Tucker, effortlessly plucking the actual red hood from the streets: and I whoop-

Jason, whose type is strong, nerdy, and tall: *heart eyes* *but not really because he’s unconscious*

——

Sam: “this is my boyfriend Danny and our other boyfriend Tucker.”

Jason enters chat:

Sam: “this is my boyfriend Danny and our other boyfriend Tucker and his boyfriend, the Red Hood.”

——

#writing prompt #DCxDP #Sam Mason #dpxdc #Danny Phantom #Tucker Foley #they share an apartment #so basically they’ve got the swankiest living space ever #bc Gotham rent is cheap #are they platonically or romantically living together? #no one knows #I sure as hell don’t either

[h3artshapedkisses]

It’s the way you can tell most of the lesbian community are full of bi-hets just by how enraged they are by a lesbian saying she’s proud to have never kissed, dated or had sex with a man. Why are you offended by homosexuality? Shouldn’t you be happy for her? Hm..

Also I hate when the fauxbians who have never had sex with a man are like “I just never happened to have sex with a men because no man wanted me lolll I’m a gold star but ashamed to call myself one :((.” Like as very femme young woman who never has done anything even slightly romantic with a men but has had boys ask me to be their girlfriend and even male friends try to ask me for intimacy since a very young age, and has had to put her foot down and firmly say no ever single time, its so weird that they are deliberately erasing gold star’s life experiences to just being “ugly”. If you would have then you are a bisexual. Full stop.

#God we are so fucked #And the worst part about this is it isn’t even new like even older western butch lesbian are fake homosexuals who are just ugly bisexuals #And don’t fit into the male gaze #That’s why they cant imagine femme and conventially attractive women like me being gold star #To them gold star is ‘never got fucked by a man’ not never wanted to have any romance or intimacy with a man #Because if a man asked them out they would have said yes because they are bi #they can’t even began to imagine true female homosexuality that’s why they speak over us gold stars #This is why they either love wearing strap ons or getting strapped too(pillow princess or stone) i blame the older bid-hets once again #Cause they can’t imagine any sex without a dick because to them that is the most ideal form of sex #I am a gold star willingly you idiot not by accident dick lover #They also truly can’t imagine never once wanting to be with a man #To them its just a missed oportunity #Sorry this is so long but yea #Like I’m sorry but older lesbians who aren’t willingly gold star don’t represent me or stand for me #They don’t speak up for me or even want me in their spaces and i sure as hell don’t want them in mine

[fishyartist]

Danny phantom episode “Girls night out” deserves more hate. Like it’s the worst of season 3’s shift into more generic superhero cartoon plot lines imo, it’s gender politics are noxious. Something about the art is especially not working for me. ember and spectra should be trying to maul each other.

#danny phantom #also I’m sure u could make a jazz sam Maddie episode work with a real idea #and not just ‘they’re women and we’re making a Women episode’ #but I Don’t currently so I’m just kinda ignoring its existence #I have way more ideas for either sam not being there (so just jazz+Maddie) or Maddie being replaced with Valerie (so sam jazz and Valerie) #also the whole ‘we hate men just because our boyfriends suck ass’ thing is SO lame as a motivation #like u can smell the stench of cisallo men w/ 0 self reflection writing this shit man it REEKS #canon Johnny and Kitty need to break up (and also stay away from high schools but that’s two other epidodes-) #also ember+skulker squicks me the hell out #it’s not canon but skulker reads as like in his 40s to me and embers like in her late late teens/early 20s #OH AND ANOTHER THING #spectra’s ‘’i make men stop existing by blowing a kiss at them’’ power has NO connection to her manipulation+energy sapping it’s so lame

[victimized-martyr]

I love all your kyman hc's so much!!!!😭❤ I just need to hear more, so here are my questions: if kyman got married how would they act around each other? And do you think they'd adopt kids and if yes: what would they name them? And would they raise them jewish or christian or both?

Aaahhh I know there are too many questions I'm sorry 😭😭

Don’t apologize, I love talking about kyman :D

Regardless of context, the core of their dynamic is: Cartman is the instigator, Kyle reacts, a little back and forth, escalate the issue to Nth degrees of insanity, Kyle lands the final blow. Though sometimes, depending on the issue, Kyle lands the last punch thinking he’s won, only for Cartman to win the war last minute. Another way the show’s mixed things up, is that Kyle’s victory is undermined either by South Park itself, or Cartman. I see their marriage as an opportunity to expand their unique dynamic and introduce new plotlines/ jokes that couldn’t be done if they were still kids.

I see Cartman taking Randy’s place as the adult that’s always up to no good, the fixture of South Park’s weirdness. self serving hijinks flare up just about every week. Meanwhile, the Sharon (or straight man) to offset that cannot be anyone else but Kyle. This time however, unlike the marshes, and perhaps most couples in South Park, the Brofloski’s are truly in love. That’s kinda the joke. The couple that started out insulting each other and trying to kill each other on multiple occasions end up in the happiest relationship. I see them fitting nicely among the pantheon of sitcom couples— Mitchel and Cameron, Marge and Homer, Ralph and Alice, Gomez and Morticia. Their relationship, in Trey fashion, pays homage to and in the same breath, mocks those classic couples.

TLDR, Their dynamic is in tact, it’s just evolved to a new label. Instead of sort of friends-ish, they’re a couple. They’re still loud, obsessed with each other, fight over issues, hang out and share similar tastes. Only this time they got rings on their fingers. And if they don’t fistfight, how do they deal with their classic arguments? Well, like any sensible american couple, of course! they fuck each other’s brains out! ( just kidding. I have this vision of Cartman doing the most outrageous shit and Kyle chasing him offscreen in anger, Cartman shouting “domestic abuse domestic abuse!”)

I’m not sure what they’d name their kids. Does it matter? I do know what personalities I’d like them to have though— the 1st, their oldest, is outgoing, entitled, bossy, manipulative, a performative people pleaser, makes everyone’s problems their responsibility, and is quick witted. (A 2w3) Much like Eric, they are exceptionally charismatic and love being in the limelight. And like Kyle, they love getting involved in the lives of others, seen as helpful. The 2nd child is less outspoken, prefers to keep opinions to themselves, a dispassionate observer. ( poster child for 8w9) Like Eric, they’re materialistic, and prone to laziness. Still, they are an intellectual like Kyle, and far more principled in comparison to their sibling/Eric. They’re probably the most capable and dangerous in the family. They don’t shoot themselves in the foot like Cartman, and they don’t fight against the currents of South Park like Kyle. If they wanted to, they could take over the world and succeed where the Brofloskis failed. They just don’t care though lol.

I could never, ever see them as a two religion household. Yeah, Cartman has been portrayed as a bigoted Christian (or in his words, “[used] Christianity as an excuse to be a piece of shit”), but carrying that extremity to adulthood isn’t as funny. I don’t know how to articulate that other than, many extreme right wingers on twitter weren’t able to read Cartman’s bigotry in Cupid Ye as hyperbolic and instead took it as fact, and praised the stuff he whispered into Tolkien’s ears. His actions in Cissy were recently trending and was seen as heroic and like, justification why trans ppl can’t use whatever bathrooms they want. You can’t escalate the crazy stuff from real life anymore— it’s become reality. So the funniest thing to do, is either personify it as something else or, run in the opposite direction. If anything, PC has shown us that it’s funnier that the very same kid who once belittled Judaism in fact, became devoutly Jewish and proceeded to rub it in everyone’s faces rather than him ending up as some evil businessman. You rob bigots the chance to idolize Cartman, but give Cartman the freedom to hone his brand of idiocy on other things. So! Kyle slaps the antisemitism outta him, they get married, bam. They are a Jewish family.

#south park #kyman #eric cartman #kyle broflovski #cartman #what is brevity? hell if I know #asks #talk tag #Again it’s important that Cartman’s an asshole in different ways #like there’s this excellent trey quote where he introduces Matt as his wife #and like. wouldn’t that be the perfect way to piss kyle off?? #‘My lovely wife Kahl’ ‘honey you really need to get that sand out of your vagina’ #Cartman just loves Kyle’s attention in general so yeah he’s a tease but instead of insults he prefers flirting #is it because its the right thing to do and the way to respect his spouse? sure if that’s what u think. all Cartman knows is that #the less he insults his husband and the more praise he gives the better sexy times is #the insults don’t come from a genuine place anymore either bc again he’s reconciled how in love he is w/ kyle #and w/ kyle he knows cartman is all talk and he loves putting him in place and like why would he pummel his husband in punches if kisses #knocks him off his pedestal even more?? literally a look will bring his husband to his knees (reverence..apology..other..doesn’t matter) #oop im blurring this tag w/ my next answered question lolol

[apostaterevolutionary]

You know what would be really funny, is if people came together to have an anti-crab day. A day where every user who joined prior to automattic’s acquisition logged off for 24 hours to show that yes, actually, older user retention is important and you should listen us just as much as new users

The users giveth, the users taketh away

#this isn’t about the sidebar btw I’ve already said I don’t mind the sidebar #I think it could be a better sidebar like the 2014 tumblr layout which was great #but it’s Fine (tm) #this is about live and the new post editor and the apparent avatar removal bs ‘experiment’ #and it’s also about how these big overhauls keep being done meanwhile we can’t have like. a search function that works #or the queue reordering tools that already exist on mobile web applied to any other platform #you know. all the little stuff that’s comparatively easy to implement yet they ‘don’t have time’ for because they’re too busy #with these massive overhauls and ignoring all the asks that go to wip #also I don’t expect anyone to actually do this and I’m sure as hell not organizing anything cause that’s a lot of work lmao #but I think giving them money pre-emptivelt just showed they can do whatever they want and we’ll fall for it #taking away money would be more effective #idk I don’t think current staff are any better at running tumblr than yahoo was #they’re just better at the ‘we’re quirky and relatable just like you guys uwu’ bit #and a lot of us fell for it but I think the illusion is starting to lift #anyway idk it sucks here but all the other sites are either worse or empty so what can we do #(genuinely wtf can we do this nonsense is getting bad) #text #misc #shut up nerd #new layout stuff

[quietwingsinthesky]

I stand by the fact that the archangels have a single braincell between the four of them, and Gabriel is the one who has custody of it.

#he’s the only one here who makes (relatively) good choices #the bar is low but. he’s got his niche in the world. Thee Trickster #he’s like. mostly happy with the life he has. sure haunted by the one he lost/ran from #but also had the capacity to realize that getting the hell out of dodge was his best option and he was RIGHT #to anyone who sees this and goes: ‘no but isnt Raphael-‘ shut up silence shush #you don’t understand them like I do. you have been fooled by their regal demeanor and terrifying grief. #need I remind you. blew out the eastern seaboard for kicks. had to make sure Chuck didn’t accidentally kill himself falling down the stairs #every other day. saw that the apocalypse didn’t work and decided the logical conclusion was to just Do It Again But Better This Time #THEY HAVE WINGS MADE OF LIGHTNING PURELY FOR THE FUCKKNG DRAMA OF IT. #if you gave them both the same task. you might not be able to predict how either of them would solve it #but you could work back how Gabriel came to his conclusion and go yeah okay that probably made sense to you #raphael is going to return whatever problem you asked them to solve to you. and it will be solved. sure. but it will probably also be #unrecognizable as whatever you handed over. if you gave Raphael a pickle jar to open. well. it would be open. somehow it would not have #pickles in it anymore. you should probably not eat whatever is in there. it might bite you. #whereas if something in Gabriel’s pickle jar bites it’s because he thinks you’re a dick and it would be funny if a pickle bit your finger #I’m losing control of this metaphor #Michael & Lucifer aren’t even in the running btw. og bad decision bros. #supernatural #spn

[mockingmolly]

Man, the contrast of M9 getting Molly back in the form of Kingsley, versus BH potentially getting Laudna back in the form of Matilda? With tm9, Kingsley was quite possibly the kindest way they could have gotten any semblance of their friend back. It had been a year without him and none of his friends existed as he would have remembered them anymore, and he would have been faced with the struggle of trying to find his place in their group again, coming back a contrast to the person they built him up as while he was dead.

And furthermore, he came back into a time of newly-won peace, after they had managed to defeat the threats that had been building up since his death. They got him back specifically because of their success, and gave this fresh-memoried person a world ahead of them to reclaim themself the way molly never truly had. But Matilda? If the soul they pluck from the afterlife is the girl who died and stayed dead on the tree, instead of the one who spent 30 years living in the aftermath of it, they’re essentially dragging up a girl who has long-since been at rest, to thrust her into the deep end of the biggest threat any of them have ever faced, and inevitably expecting her to be able to swim and keep up. A girl who died without having any grasp of her powers, nor life experience beyond what she knew at the outskirts of the briarwood’s rule. Plucked up and dropped into a group of strangers who are dealing with some pretty intense grief, and the weight of the world on their shoulders. 

Laudna has, of course, gone through a lot. There’s no reality in which she isn’t deeply fucked up by what happened before, upon, and after this second death. Reckoning with the sudden loss of Delilah over her shoulders and what it means for her going forward is going to be a journey, but she’ll have her family by her side through all of it. She’ll have the knowledge she’s gained through 30 years of unliving and a grasp on what’s at stake in the world she’s coming back to. The world she seems to want to come back to, as shaken as she is.

If the soul they reach out to is Matilda, there’s no guarantee that anything they could say will appeal to a stranger that’s been dead and at rest for decades. And even if they do, i can’t help but feel like uprooting and forcing a soul they don’t know into a life/burden they have no way out of is also one of the crueler outcomes in all of this.

#critical role #cr meta #bells hells #cr laudna #like I think it’ll be juicy either way BUT this is yet another thing that solidifies my disinterest in us getting another Kingsley scenario #because what happened to Kingsley was /kind/ #and this? this is not. this is striking Laudna down to her lowest and just. keeping her there #no closure or restitution. just the end of the story. she’ll know exactly what she’s leaving behind and everything she’s lost. #there’s no path amongst the living that won’t be *difficult* sure. there’s going to be a lot to process and a lot of reopened trauma #but there’s at least the possibility of healing and reclamation on the other side. a chance at living she’s only gotten the bastardized #version of the last three decades. #whereas plucking Matilda out of the afterlife and basically going Hey Kid You Don’t Know Us #but do you wanna come deal WITH ALL THIS SHIT?? #also feels like the cruelest way *Matilda* could get her second shot at living. she diedat her lowest too but the burden #of the life she’d be forced back into outweighs the rest she’s found in being in the afterlife for 30 years #we talk about the lack of agency laudna has had throughout this and there’s truth to it. but at least she *wants* to come back. #she has people she wants to come back and fight for. has something to gain from living again #a life to reclaim #with Matilda it would be uprooting her and forcing her into a life she has no way out of #no choice #sivsi speaks.

[akkivee]

presumably the climax of rhyme anima➕ is that underground rap tournament mentioned in the trailer so i hope we get more focus on hypnosis abilities this time around now that they’re more fleshed out lol

#this is vee speaking #i cannot express enough how funny it is hypmic has gotten this far with its development hell lmao #waaaay in the beginning only jakurai’s ability was revealed and based off s1 they knew what the og leaders’ were #but it’s so funny those early notes seemed to have included that abilities needed to be unlocked and what doppo’s was lol #but now!!!!!!! n o w!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! surely we can see all their abilities in action!!!!!!! #hifumi’s melty roses!!!!!! rio’s shield!!!!! jakurai’s rap had all the tentacles but lets get kuukou’s dragon on that LOL!!!!!!! #i’m so curious how this all comes together lol like tbh is beefing specifically with the og groups????? #but if the tbh truck is what’s causing the civilians to start acting up then that means it’s driven thru osaka and nagoya #so what’s their plans there????? #pls be battle anthem order pls be battle anthem order idc if it makes more sense for fp to be next pls let bat star next episode lol 🙏 #and even chuuoku has ‘stakes’ as in they don’t know wtf is going on either #but one of their ranks likely caused the trigger which means they need to be involved in some way too 🤔🤔🤔 #what does it all mean lmao where is it all going lol

[un-local]

very interesting how all the lonesome aesthetic yearning girlbloggers are like. the most allergic to any kind of interaction…

#I like one too many posts in a row and get blocked for spam liking. Many such cases #either that or what. is my blog that detestable? I suppose so #If you don’t want people going thru ur blog set it to private. My sideblog is. Would recommend. #but sure yeah. Keep longing and reblogging posts about how alone you are and how you miss a friendship you’ll never have + how the #Humanity of mundane interactions with strangers is the truest joy or whatever #you’re winning at this mindset for sure 👍 #guys we gotta get word out that this is literally how this site is used. We can’t let them take spam liking away from us #What? I can’t scroll a randos blog while I wait for a doc appt? Is there nothing left for me in this world? The hell man #harebrained thought #hare posts #misc tag

[insaneillusionist]

Too tired to really be happy and kind of want an explanation on the differences between love and favorite people.

#my random stuff #delete later #I can’t not be mad today. #But I’m tired too. #I just want to know what this feeling is. #It sure as hell isn’t love. #And I don’t think it’s that either. #What’s the third option?

[shadowsandstarlight]

Today I discovered that my social studies teacher listens to Welcome to Night Vale, and I am still in a bit of shock.

#of the things you expect to have in common with your social teacher. this is not usually one of them. #it’s not as though he’s like. a young new teacher either. if he was I wouldn’t be surprised at all. #no I’m pretty sure he’s in his fifties. #very stereotypical history teacher (/pos). likes to use gen z slang sometimes specifically because it sounds ridiculous coming from him. #I don’t know what I expected but him being a night vale fan was not on the list #we had to make fictional propaganda posters and I did one on the faceless old woman vs hiram mcdaniels mayoral race #included a little explanation because I figured he would have no idea what the hell was going on otherwise #but no he comes up and mentions that he likes the poster and he’s listened to the podcast #asks if I’ve read alice isn’t dead and says it’s really good and he’d recommend it #y’know. typical chat with your middle-aged social studies teacher.

[swordmaid]

which is also why I think - in a vengeance shri’iia au where she ends up as astarion’s spawn and he inevitably gets tired of her bc he has all the power in the world and he can have anything and anyone he wants and everything is his for the taking - when she inevitably turns from his ‘eternal lover’ to just his ‘first spawn’ - she will be sooo amy gone girl about it.

like she’s devoting her oath and her entire life to him, he doesn’t get to change that. he’s not allowed to change even. she will do everything in her power and she will even set fire to them both if he tried to change. like he’s making a mistake that she’s rectifying! she lives to serve, and if he doesn’t want her servitude that means there’s something that’s not right and she will personally correct that. like he doesn’t need to worry about anything ofc - worrying doesn’t look good on him let her fix what needs to be fixed. she is such a good lover after all. it doesn’t compute to her that she’s going to be replaced. like it literally doesn’t make sense, not when he promised her eternity. so when he starts looking at someone else, when he starts to favor someone else and lavish them with his attentions and praise she will get rid of them because he’s getting distracted! and he doesn’t need distractions! and when he gets mad at her she will forgive his transgressions and soothe that anger away - he doesn’t need anymore wrinkles. and she will know about every little lie he says and hold them close to her chest then recite it back to him when she gets rid of another one of his new favourites. and when he tries to kill her she’ll do the same thinking it’s some game or courtship - this is how it was back in menzoberranzan after all! the fact that he was willing to learn her traditional courtship is so sweet 🥰. and maybe she’ll scare him even, so he can learn what fear is again. it’s a good kind of fear bc she’s showing what kind of person she could be so it would be dumb of him to throw her away.

but the thing is! she’s operating out of love and devotion! and they have eternity together! and there’s something sooo sicko yes about how ascended astarion’s first spawn - his first creation - being something that he will eventually resent and fears. bc it would be so much easier if she hated him like how he hated cazador. but she doesn’t. she’s deranged and in love and so obsessive about that love to the point where it literally can not be changed - and he can’t change it or manipulate it. what was once useful to him became a detriment. their love turning so sick and rotten, like a leftover apple, and she becomes a nuisance that he can’t get rid of, and he’s stuck with that nuisance for eternity. he eventually realises what a mistake it was seducing her back then when they had those tadpoles in their heads, when they had that strange freedom. like if he knew things would turn out like this, and she was actually this kind of person, maybe he would’ve done things differently but instead he’s stuck with her for eternity.

and I do think he’ll try to kill her lmfao I mean he’s a vampire lord and she’s just a fucking spawn so he’ll get rid of her once he gets bored and annoyed, but she thinks it’s some game between them so she’ll try to get him too - not kill him ofc but just close enough to scare him and remind him that she does bite even before the vampire teeth. I mean before him, she was literally a drow high priestess’/matron mother’s trained hound.

anyway I really love the idea of them being miserable with each other lmfaoo and I think she will be so miserable as a spawn actually and the moment when she potentially gets replaced something is gonna break inside of her bc it’ll just like before when she broke her oath. but she won’t be that bewildered and confused girl again, nope. she’s not going to accept it this time, she refuses! she doesn’t get to be the only miserable one, he doesn’t get to win..!!!

#they’d be so rancid together im like sicko yes ..‼️‼️ #anyway I think it’ll be very late down the years when he gets tired of her but he WILL ! like I’m sure of it #but she won’t allow it 🫶 like he doesn’t get to do that #he’s not allowed. even. and then they’ll clash and he’ll hate her 🫶 but she forgives him every time ! #he doesn’t mean it after all. it’s just one his moods and she knows him SO well. and it’s this cycle of resentment and mindfuck and love #and a whole fucking eternity of that loool #anyway that kind of toxicity def needs to be contained rip to the new spawns who gets caught up in that fuckery #like she’s still a paladin so she has an innate power advantage over the vamps since they’re undead #but now I’m wondering how would a vamp paladin work lmfao #she’s literally willing to smite and kill herself if it meant smiting him also like you don’t understand she will drag him down to hell #with her if it meant they go together. it doesn’t matter if he wants to or not 😭 #she is really so deranged the best possible ending for her is to take all that energy and focus it on herself not someone else 😭 #bc she’s the only one who can handle it you know ..!!! hence why I think spawn astarion/vengeance shri’iia wouldn’t work either bc she’ll #be too much for him like you can’t fix her…! she can only fix herself if she wanted to ..! #shut up about bg3.

[what-the-fuck-khr]

I really should go to the doctors and try and figure out just what the fuck my skin is doing lol

#my hands are red and warm as hell and kinda itchy but otherwise #usually every other red patch on me is warm but never usually itchy #man. I have no idea ow to like. go about explaining this to a doctor #yeah my skin gets red slightly raised and super fucking warm and is patchy as hell #never in the same spots always different each time across my arms and sometimes my hands #and sometimes on my legs but I don’t pay as much attention to that #assuming my legs and feet don’t look two seconds from dropping off lol #and it only ever usually happens around midnight and onwards #and idk if it’s heat related I’m not sure bc on very hot days this doesn’t happen ?? #and it doesn’t happen during the day either so ??? only at night only well past like. midnight or smth #so yeah. idk how to go about explaining this #let alone if a doctor would even take me seriously lmfao #ooc #if you’re a doctor on here and you might have an idea for me to research… it’d be appreciated

[kazoologist]

I actually really fucking hate how anything in my schedule not going the way I initially Intended For It To just automatically makes me a massive fucking crybaby and or a raging bitch. Like dude. The grocery store does not hate me. It sucks that my schedule requires me to get there an hour earlier no matter what but like. They didn’t do that to me. Why am I always so upset whenever I have to change plans. I change plans too! I’m a living person!!! Why am I so fucking upset about this!!!!!!

#personal #im gonna delete this later I’m just venting #I’m also fine I’m just having a rough day and I can’t figure out why my emotions have been so fucking volatile. It’s so frustrating that #I can’t figure out how to get a handle on my emotions. I know I need to feel things but the problem is if I let myself feel them too much #Then I’m going to spiral or lash out at some random bystander and both of these make the initial feeling worse #I just can’t pull myself out of that quickly enough recently. It’s not an issue of ability bc I can. I just can’t do it. #wait that’s contradictory. I’ve been really struggling too recently. There we go. There’s accuracy. #Either way. Didn’t I spend all year in therapy last year trying to get this shit together? What the fuck. #Why is it the second I show a modicum of progress I immediately hit a single pebble on the road and get sent ass over teakettle #Progress isn’t linear but it also sure as hell isn’t meant to be a time loop. That I’m pretty sure of. #God everything’s just been so difficult this year. Shit that used to be almost instinctual to me now is a nightmare. #Maybe it’s growing pains and I guess that’s valid but how long do I have to have them #The good news is that thus far I have not snapped at anyone so at least right now we don’t have any casualties of my bad attitude #I feel so bad being so worried about that but like seriously no one needs me to be snapping at them. Even if I feel catharsis in the moment #We all feel bad immediately afterwards #It’s literally not even been a bad day today. I cannot emphasize how this has been the only problem today. Literally so much good happened #Ugh #dont look at me

[merevide]

how it feels to be a lesbian fan in tlou spaces who’s not romantically obsessed with tlou2 ellie williams

#caption simplying it bc ik a bunch of lesbians don’t even gag about her #a decent amount of lesbians in my age range online are obsessed w her though when it’s like #not all of them bless. but anyway #i can’t even see her like that like yeah sure she’s attractive. but omg #some of the lengths people go to. they scare me not 2 b a puritan or anything i respect the grind #ellie is just like. my friend. someone whom i care for deeply #i’m not obsessed with abby either. hell i think i like dina more in that way than i do either of them 😭 #or marlene or tess or maria. idk when i see tlou2 i think of tlou1 ellie who was silly and told dumb pums. #she was like my kid my friend my buddy i miss her……… #this isn’t me flexing how different i am either. hell idrk why i’m admitting this #ig bc i talk about whatever i want ok that’s my text post for today #i meant to post smth different but i don’t feel like baring my soul too much #my text #not tagging as tlou r u joking #might delete later

[theamazingannie]

Not my mom asking me what my brother’s email and password is and me knowing it lmao. Why does no one around here even acknowledge that I’m more of a parent to my brother than they are

#she’s mad that he listens to me better than he listens to her #not only do not constantly yell at him and not bother to work with him #but Im the one who wakes him up in the morning #Im the one that makes sure he showers and goes to bed at a decent time #Im the one who helps him with his homework #hell I’m the only one who bothers to make sure he does it BEFORE he gets the zero in the grade book #and he doesn’t even see me as an authority figure because they don’t respect me so why should he #if I try to punish him or reinforce his behavior in any way they always overrule me #and then give him a worse reinforcement tactic that clearly doesn’t work #like i really feel like we’d be better off if they just fucked off and left me completely in charge of him #they refuse to take any accountability yet blame me for anything he does wrong #they are literally such shit parents and it took them so long to realize it because my sister and I parented ourselves #but my brother was spoiled too much growing up so he never learned how and they never learned how to parent #and refuse to learn now #they get mad if I try to offer any tips despite being the only one who’s ever successful #they ignore the fact that I have a degree in psychology and took classes in childhood development because I don’t have the experience #but apprently they don’t have the experience either or else they’d be better at this! #Ugh it’s so annoying watching them do everything wrong and being comoelehlt powerless to do anything #i cant imagine how bad it would be if I wasn’t here #they’d probably beat him constantly since I’m the only one that can stop them #the only thing they really provide is transportation and money #and still they’re too lazy to drive us around anywhere half the time and are constantly blowing their money on frivolous things #so we don’t have enough sometimes to pay bills or have nice dinners #that *I* make btw cuz they’re too lazy to #which is fine cuz I don’t work but before I moved back in they were eating ramen noodles and mac and cheese every day #and have the audacity to say I don’t do shit around here #they would FLOUNDER without me #god i cant wait until I can get out of here but I literally don’t know if I ever will cuz ive not been well mentally #and theyre behavior isn’t helping