everyday i think about how my school was structured purposefully as a panopticon in 1990 to dissuade anti-war protests like vietnam war in the 1970s and today the school decides to bring tons of police and state troopers against peaceful protesters and for what. it's sickening. there was never any interest in peace or in maintaining the 1st amendment ever in this school
At first, it was just Wade and his car, then came Peter, then Peter was like man gimme that shit. Now Wade is the passenger princess, giving directions.
Also no one's told me the car had its design changed too??????!
When you're a kid and people do bad stuff to you or you witness bad things being done, you're encouraged to 'tell someone' and 'not keep it secret' and it's almost like we're responsible for making it known and making it stop, you know, if we don't do it nobody will.
But then when we do talk to the person we think is going to believe it + who has the means to stop it, and we get shut down and silenced, this person,, is not responsible for anything at all? They've just been given this valuable information that took us so much courage to open up about and the responsibility, at this point, should be 100% off of our shoulders because we did it, we Told Someone, it should get resolved now, but no? We get victim blamed and told we're making it up or even worse, that we need to shut up about it to keep the 'peace', and the person who does this to us is somehow clear of all responsibility, despite aiding the abusers blatantly??
I don't care anymore, if we told someone we did our part, and the rest is now on that person's shoulders, or maybe, MAYBE on the abuser's shoulders, because they're the ones committing crimes in the first place and it's literally 0% our fault this monster is out there. We are not responsible for protecting the world from the abusers, especially when we tell on them and you all shut us up and punish us for exposing their crimes.
I hate everyone here calling it the "funny, sexy" disorder.
I don't want to sound self-deprecating or pretend there shouldn't be pride in having a disorder, but I'm losing so much from life because of it.
I'm an adult now and I don't feel it. I'm still at home with my parents and not cooking or cleaning or driving. I have zero friends in real-life or online. The older i get,, the more pathetic and embarrassed I feel. I go to the doctor and dentist and get talked down to like a child, and when I bring up an issue they completely disregard me and treat me like I'm stupid.
I'm not even leaving the house when there's no school, meanwhile everyone else my age is having the time of their life hanging out with others. Even during school time, people are talking and laughing. And I'm just feeling more isolated as it goes on. I just can't communicate and probably never will. I can't mask at all.
I hate this. I don't want to be "normal," but I also don't want to just be sitting here letting life go by without ever having any fun or freedom or any type of satisfaction.
ok, i’m back with stirring up the shit again, cause i just can’t take it anymore...
the good big sister rhaenyra is ooc nonsense. i don’t know why is everyone so obsessed with it - well no, that’s a lie, it’s painting her as a better person then she actually is. rhaenyra is not a bad person, she is certainly better than most, and surely, she is a great mom but she is a shitty sister. she was jealous of aegon when he was a baby, she wanted to torture aemond, a child, who lost his eye over some allegations and... does she even know that helaena exists? she was the older party in the relationship with her half-siblings and she had the responsibility to create a bond with them, which she didn’t. her and viserys were the problem.
so, why am i seeing posts about how alicent and otto are physically abusing the kids and big sister rhaenyra is taking care of them? why am i seeig fics how the kids are defecting to blacks because rhae-rhae is understanding good sister who accepts them why alicent and otto are the abusing villains?
it’s ironic, because if you look at it without pink tinted glasses, the green kids love their mom and have a relationship with otto. and i’m not saying it’s perfect, no chance for that. aegon and alicent have a problematic relationship, he is acting out and she is responding with force, clearly not great, but when given the choice? “i want my mother.” helaena has shown being in good terms with otto and i don’t think i need to go in “aemond the momma’s boy” territory.
here is the thing: headcanon away about rhaenyra being a good sister. but this follow up with especially alicent being abusive is just messed up. otto is an ass but he was never physically violent. you don’t need to prop up your fave by tearing down other characters.
The Wilds being canceled out of the blue while the last few episodes of Motherland: Fort Salem are airing after it didn't get renewed is a wild fucking shitshow. nobody touch me I'm grieving