#IS GIFING NOW SERIOUSLY

[skitskatdacat63]

2023 Brazilian Grand Prix - Podium - Fernando Alonso

#HE IS SO RADIANT ON THIS PODIUM I LOVUUUU HIMMMMMMMM #once all the pics get released on all the websites i think ill have mental breakdown pt 2 #my roman empire is hoping someone took a pic of him holding the hat in his mouth #real ones will know about my weird obsession with confetti....fufilled today #im so annoyed they cut away when he did his jumpy mario thing #he does it every single time they should know this!! #so thank you to aston's insta for the clips #not my best quality gifs which is annoying but uhhhh i am under duress from myself LMAO #i need to make a brazil 2023 moodboard just from my deranged liveblogs cause my god #see you in Vegas!!! what a way to end a triple header wow. it really made the suffering in cota and mexico worth it #now old man better keep up this performance istg #but like seriously i could wax poetic about his defneding and overtaking in this race #it was actually unbelievable the level of skill he has #to defend against the superior rb19 for like 30~ laps and then to be able to overtake it with his much slower car??? chills. #has anyone gifed his overtake bcs my god i fell down #f1 #formula 1 #fernando alonso #2023 brazilian gp #we do a little bit of f1

[spicyvampire]

Lawyer Charn's favorite word : cute

LAWS OF ATTRACTION (2023) EP. 1 + EP. 2

+ Bonus :

#laws of attraction #laws of attraction the series #charntinn #asiandramasource #dramasource #mjtag #tonanons #tansgifs #gifs:loa #well i'm seriously doomed now here we go #trust a little morally grey guy to get me out of a gifing slump #these looks very bad on mobile for some reasons

[duahauuoplanh]

Debut of Junho x Yoona Senorita The practice ver. vs The viral steamy on stage ver.

#I even blushed myself gifing these then how the hell they are still friends after this #what kind of strong friendship is that? #didn't they give this steamy performance and then acted like none of this ever happen? #with all the touch and gaze and stuffs #they seriously acted like they were going to make out #and they confirmed they are not dating so please don't hurt them #or whatever they are for real #It's their decisions to publish it or not #lee fox #Lee junho #Junho #It’s Junho’s season now #2pm #Yoona #snsd #I put my heart into every gifset I’ve made #always next to Junho

[gatsby-system-folks]

By The Fireplace (1019 words) by jimmysofgatsby

now that I'm done obnoxiously GIFing, I wrote a fic. Remember the time(s?) Michael Sheen and David Tennant did drag? I sure do, and I wrote about it. I'm talking about Davina and Mrs. Robinson btw

Chapters: 1/? Fandom: Rab C Nesbitt (TV), There's Something About Movies (TV), The Graduate (1967) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Davina (Rab C Nesbitt)/Mrs Robinson (There's Something About Movies) Characters: Davina (Rab C Nesbitt), Mrs. Robinson (The Graduate) Additional Tags: The author has not seen the graduate, nor do they intend to, this is based on the Sheen skit, and the tennant skit for that matter, Mrs. Robinson’s name is Dottie, cheeky Good Omens reference there, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, (it’s fluff this is fluff), Fluff, meet cute, Davina does not tolerate transphobia, T4T Couple, Davina is trans, Mrs. Robinson is trans, yes she has the beard, I told you this was from the skit, actress Mrs. Robinson, bartender Davina, the author does not drink, the author doesn’t know alcohol, the author did very little research, Getting Together, (sort of), if this gets popular I might write more, i might do that anyway, Michael Sheen - Freeform, David Tennant - Freeform, I’m calling her ms not mrs bc she’s not married here Summary: Davina’s boring evening and Dottie’s uncomfortable one collide at the bar, by the fireplace. And both of their evenings get infinitely better. (I should have guessed Davina/Mrs. Robinson was a thing! But even so I'm so happy it is! Deeper into the Sheen and Tennantverse I fall, it seems)

#writing #my writing #my fic #my fanfiction #ao3 #rab c nesbitt #the graduate #its... not about the graduate im just organized (isnt organized) #michael sheen #david tennant #davina #mrs. robinson #what's the show? #is it: #there's something about movies #?? i think it is #~ shermie

[whumpookies]

Hey there, I discovered your whump list on youtube and it's so absolutely amazing, I've been watching Turkish whump for a week now, going through all of your clips! Thanks so much! I have noticed that the new clips you ad (amazing ones again!) recently now get added to the bottom of the list rather than the top and was just wondering if there's something in the settings I could change so I can see them right away? Before, I always checked for new clips by clicking on the playlist and they showed up on top, now I can only see them if I scroll down all the way. Do you know if there's a way to change that, to get to whumpy deliciousness even more quickly? Thanks so much for making that playlist, it's absolutely wonderful and fantastic!!! <3 <3 <3

🫣 seriously?!? Oh boy, anon you've made my day! Seriously you have.

Okay I know what you mean I have the same problem with it, a lot of my whumpy goodness on there is my soon to be gifed. So here's the trick.

Go to the page .

Click the sort on left just below the play.. and.

Hit the date added newest! It'll reset and give you what you want.

I'm constantly adding almost daily 😳 im also kinda shocked I've hit over 500 😱🫣 and seriously need to look through them ha!

I'm so glad you're enjoying them, the çukur clips will be swapped to their çukur whump list that I've made public over the next few days😁 so many lush whumpy cookies!!!!

Hope that's helps?

#whump #Ask #Answered #lovely anon #Have a whump cookie!!!

[daenerys-targaryen]

hey leah! how are you? hope you’re doing okay! <3

you’ve been on tumblr for a long while, haven’t you? i recently had to delete my blog bc some people i know irl found it and i just can’t deal with that lmao

at the same time i used to be a creator here YEARS ago before college/law school happened but now i finally graduated and i want to get back into it

anyway my question is and i’d love if you could expand on it - or not - you’re not obligated to answer this at all!!

what’s the best way for me to start from scratch and build a platform for my creations? i’ve been observing and i noticed tagging users is not much more affective than tagging the content itself? if so how does that work; can i tag anyone who lists the media i’m working on as an interest or do we have to be mutuals or literally what i’m losing my mind over this lmao i feel like such a millennial i used to rock this website

participate in events?? look for discord servers?? (where would i even find them 😩😩)? like anything guidance you could spare, no matter how obvious or simple i’d really appreciate <33

but again you seriously don’t have to!!! i wouldn’t want to pressure you or take up your time! just let me know 😊

have a great night!

Hi there anon! I'm doing well, thanks for asking!

I have been on here for quite some time, yes. Oh my gosh asdfjkl that's so scary! I hope you're doing okay after that ordeal.

I would say the best way to help circulate your creations and broaden your audience would be to 1) make lots of content, 2) join source blogs and 3) tag people in your creations.

Make lots of content: Even if you're new to gifing or editing, people will notice if you're making a lot of good content. I'm not sure what it is, but when I see a new blog or a person who I just wasn't aware of making tons of content, I want to follow them even if everything they post doesn't appeal to me because I want new content. The more you make content, the more if will be spread around and the more exposure you'll get.

Joining source blogs: There are tons and tons of source blogs that are looking for new members. Depending on what you're wanting to gif, (lord of the rings, stranger things, pedro pascal, skyrim, etc) you'd go to the explore page and look up 'pedro pascal' and you'd see posts made by pedrohub, for example. If you're not interested in gifing just one particular thing (movies, tv shows, video games, youtubers, podcasts etc) then you can also find and join blogs dedicated to everything. And I mean everything. For example, @stream, @chewbacca, @dailyflicks, @cinematv are all source blogs dedicated to just about everything. Find some source blogs you'd like to be part of, make sure to read the blog rules and boom! Your content is being shared to a whole new audience.

Tagging people in your creations: Similar to joining source blogs, best way to get your content reblogged by source blogs if you're not in them is to tag them. For example, @stream tracks '#userstream', @chewbacca tracks '#chewieblog', @dailyflicks tracks '#dailyflicks' and @cinematv tracks '#cinematv'. You can also find people also make content for the same thing and tag them too!

For sure participate in events! Join those discord servers! Most well ran source blogs (no shade to those who don't do this but it just makes everything fun and easier) will already have a discord server set up dedicated to the blog itself. It will have a general, rules and creations tab where you can discuss the blog, share your creations and also chat if it's that vibe of the server. Some might even have a spoilers tab, some might have a pets tab where you can send pictures of your pets. It really just depends on the kind of people are in the server and again, what the vibe is like. Some source blog discord servers I'm in are QUIET and are only active when someone is sharing their creations (which is just fine!) and some others are active every minute of the day. Again it just depends on who is in the server.

Also, just befriending someone who also makes the same content as you or someone who you admire in the fandom or someone who you'd just like to be friends with helps too! If you're friends with people in your fandom then obviously they're going to reblog your content if they want to! I'm not saying to make friends simply so that you get more notes on your creations, I hope that's clear. But I am saying that it certainly doesn't hurt :)

Hope this gave you some insight and good luck!

#leah has mail #Anonymous #i really hope the read more works #if not i am so sorry #long post #<- in case it doesn't work

[unhumanrights]

Sunk-cost fallacy?

I may not be spending a lot of time per day on it, but I'm still playing around with the T'Lyn/Mariner idea in my head. It's a lot different from the original thanks to canon changing in an instant. I do think the basic premise is still logical (heh), but I wonder if I am clinging too tightly to an idea which might not be worth it. It definitely started as a goof, a bit, a basic setup and a punchline. Can I write a new punchline now that the old one no longer works? Maybe I shouldn't think of it as a bit anymore, and that will free my mind to take it more seriously?

You know what would probably help? If I actually sat down and devoted time to my writing! It's just so easy to get caught up with my new hobby of clipping and GIFing Lower Decks episodes. Or just reading, which requires less effort. Ah, the same old dilemma: too much to do with too little time. I really should set aside a bigger block of time today or tomorrow to puzzle over everything. Maybe I'll find the answer if I am uninterrupted.

But first, I have to go to work!

[wpdariacutnes]

🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡

Me: (I have disgusting coffee because I don't have the usual one that you pour water right away and pour water to the clumps, it's just that you throw it into coffee like a coffee machine but don't smell it in small boxes)

Me: I make bit smole legs a not so fluffy like normal ver get a code bit more balans and is me only oc a be so old a exe ver megaman but more be player cherater so not so lot expleing because more a play a dys as games you knows a makes self a game cherater and gife name and play a cherater and radom canon say hi

🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡

Me:

Me and dys one a be soft cheraters i neber a make tedi a radom persen gif me shorbela because knows a do self series a make self as megamancomunity to so das gif and going self side

Backstory a solo cherater:

Tedi you can tell more that it is megaman.exe like a small old corors elements as it has it like now it's more like a milk jelly and that's all i know, it's a flyer and a fighter type, but it uses a shield more often than it fights, it's something between using a shield 30% and attacking 80% but look more code balans a kid a older persen max 18 but she 22 canda i neber a yers old a she get

A

Shorbela is more iris.exe ( roll.exe not at all because it's not active, it doesn't even have a combat type or a shield type or anything, you can only buy things more) because she's more of a shop because you can buy weapon charges/up1/healing/acquire armor to but not sure a armor more dys and it's more candy because it's more of a skelpiary and it's more associated with a generally small shop and not a big building but be corors a canda bit supraze 🏳️‍⚧️ yep dys one but canda more vanila cupcake look like because Real grils ask how look a gril a enifing be more sweets but a core dont lising because i guy enifing deam woman body and eskuze be o because never be like her a so pop bobbis a tits braaa...so dys me vers cherater a be canda make sowing nice but after get a deam radom bullshit a never be woman a Real and make code popstar her

🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡

Me:

No have name because neber a radom agien code nice gril but ploblem a did agien like shorbela a laters showing finish art a coplement a never be woman and popstar her a make me angry point but okey okey

So be code blood bunny like radom not a dys now move rund a YouTube a dys samuraj white bunny so bi older after gril wona polegaze me because puch dys art like so angry because knows a start spik agien a stupid rezan so skriming a me finka a code like me a alt voice a make more female fact i das say a bullshit rezan a code make sexy bill

because they were starting to say that there are no fat people that the only art dys that is female is that she has sexy boobis and seriously the chick talks like a barrel organ because someone will say that in real life I have a voice like an alt woman as war just like durzo you can see my art they are more chubby but not to such an extent that the look of a dead body has never been like that more the problem of high school chicks is that if you draw a fat person it's unreal so i say a your say me a chillhood past and nader day ander code sessy years and play your bullshit because one art a make fet cherater so now not doing because start agien a cale me sexist cale me a be pig u unwoman because not so smove body so better be shut up a code true god heres in reality plase and code still renka with sharp aburs and throw a scratched face and then you don't fuck that you kick this chick like balls what a got i done a toking a woman bullshit hell a wona be vanpire and out deam eye on someone woman's like whatever me get a shit rant a be to rage like she perfect compani knows better a Real worlds a me be a deam hello kitty babys

🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡

Offical epic note: 27.04.2023.r

🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡🦎🍡

#dogo bot megaman ver #megamancomunity #mereal #wpexpleing #parents take rule #youtube #art 2023

[saltpepperbeard]

Everlark scenes I always put on repeat. Part 2/?

#Everlark #Katniss Everdeen #Peeta Mellark #thg #Edit #Now that I've figured out how to properly gif I cAN'T STOP DOING THE THING LOL #It's also been quite a while since I've gifed anything so I felt like I needed a bit of a stretch #But okay #Listen #I know a lot of people can't take this scene seriously #Mostly because of the whole 'Simmmbba' aspect of it lmao #BUT LIKE #ALL THE CARESSES AND STARES HERE ABSOLUTELY MURDER ME #And idk #I kind of feel like this is one of the moments where Katniss' wall falls down and she reveals her vulnerable inner feelings for a bit #Like I've always taken that smile she does at the end to be genuine #Because maybe it hits her that 'Wow. This boy really does care for me. He actually loves me.' #So I just #I JUST #Repeats

[shijiujun]

a top 50 moments wouldnt be enough for all the wenzhou moments i love but seriously that soft hair brushing moment in 34 was just, idk, it felt so real like something someone in that moment would do to their loved one and it felt so off the fly like it didnt feel scripted, even if it was, it came across so natural and instinctive.

OKAY I FEEL YOU SO MUCH ON THIS ANON like I was trying to figure out like cross ep gifsets once i finished gifing all the way to 37 per episode right, and like my usual sets (i mean usual by like you know, looking at each other blah blah whatever) like usually it’s easy to pick out the eps and parts? but damnn i’m honestly having so much trouble because every single ep has so much!!!! so much to frickin gif in every single episode and part i weep and it really is the chemistry between zzh and gj i have to say, and that the both of them really went hard when acting (i guess no pressure since no one expected it to do well right) 

LOOK AT EM NOW hehehe

#asks #shl

[malyen0retsev]

Couple things:

1. How do people have the very specific scenes gifed already?? April 23rd who??

2. I think the show might really make me ship Malina—not that I ever disliked them, but I was more just “okay, sure Leigh, whatever you say, that’s cool” but I think the two actors playing them have too good of chemistry to not ship the characters (and I oop-)

3. Also, I hate that people can’t separate fiction from reality, and are hating on the actors, and then all the other crap I’ve seen you speak about. Just sad and the overreaction to some of the things coming out, like bruh just wait until you actually see the show and the context before we judge, how ‘bout that mate?

anyways thx for coming to my ted talk

The scenes are from these two videos here! https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x80cpex https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x80ktq9 They were the cast talking about the show but were interspersed with clips which is what people are giffing rn! 

And honestly, like, I’ve been a Malina shipper for years so I’m not being converted (I was already here and I’ve been joyfully ushering people aboard!) BUT as a Malina shipper who dearly loves those characters I cannot fully verbalise how thrilled I’ve been with the casting of Jessie and Archie from day one. And the more clips and photos we get, the more that chemistry they have is absolutely fucking flawless. I think a lot of people are going to end up rooting for them because of that dynamic honestly (and also because we have to remember the trilogy is written just from Alina’s perspective, so in the show we will see the storyline Mal has which in the book he just hastily tells Alina about). 

With the whole ‘separate fiction from reality’ I couldn’t put it better myself. And it’s really fucking upset and angered me this week in particular (probably because as a Mal/Malina stan, I’ve seen it reach fever pitch with hatred towards Archie and I’m furious). I’ve been someone who’s actively tried to keep the balance and be like “All is chill here I don’t want to hate on anyone’s faves” and I still stand by that, but if you as a person stand by the users who are/have been abusing Archie and his daughter? Have a long hard look in the mirror because I seriously want to know what the hell is your excuse for that. yes i’m talking about twitter user bidarkling because at this point the fact that account hasn’t been suspended is outrageous anYWAY but yeah I think we all need to chill out a bit when it comes to overreacting over ‘leaked statements’ - 10 days to go now, we can do it!

#asks #anon #thanks for the ask bc you allowed me to ramble!!!!

[bo-kryzze]

CONTENT CREATOR: YEAR IN REVIEW! ✨

I was tagged by @sersi​.Thank you! <3 

first creation and most recent creation of 2020:

My first creation of the year was my Agent Carter- 5 year anniversary giftset. I seriously can’t believe it’s been 5- about to be 6 years since the show first aired! Crazy. 

My most recent creation is one of my favorite scenes from 1x06 of Agent Carter. I had way to much fun making the colors in text match the green and pink theme of the automat. 

one of your favorite creations from 2020: One of my favorite creations from 2020 was this Steggy gifset w/Taylor Swift lyrics. When I was listening to that song for the first time I was like “this part is so Steggy!” I knew I had to make a gifset for it. 

a creation you’re really proud of: A creation I’m really proud of would be the Steggy + the love of my life gifset. I’m still really happy with how this turned out. The quotes of them both referring to each other as THAT really sends me. I can’t get over it. 

a new style you tried this year and a gifset that uses it: This year I tried blending two gifs together for the first time for my Steggy Week 2020- Day 2 gifset. I can’t wait to try my hand at more blending this year. 

a creation that took you forever: A creation that took forever was my Steggy gifset for Day 1 of Steggy Week. If memory serves I spent 3 days making this set. It was well worth it! 

your creation from 2020 that received the most notes: My creation that received the most notes in 2020 is my Captain Carter in What If gifset. God, I’m so excited for the show! Can’t wait to gif that episode! 

a creation you think deserved more notes: A creation I think deserved more notes would be this one of Peggy on the mountain in The First Avenger. I have higher quality video now, so I could probably make this look a little better if I were to gif this scene again. But still, I mean look at her! She’s just so beautiful.

a creation with a favorite scene/quote: For a favorite quote, I really love the one I did with the Steggy Endgame dance and the quote from Hayley about it and what she thinks it means to the mcu as a whole. I’ve always enjoyed reading Hayley’s thoughts on the character she portrays. She puts a lot of heart and soul into her performance as Peggy. Yeah, it was lovely to read her thoughts. It made me love it more tbh. 

a new fandom you joined and a creation you made for it: Well, I’ve made a couple gifsets for Star Wars before but I suppose gifing the Mandalorian for the first time counts. I loved making this gifset for Bo Katan Kryze. She’s my girl! 

a creation you made that breaks your heart: Oh god, this Steggy one definitely. They love each other so much. 

a ‘simple’ creation that you really love: This one of Peggy from the Agent Carter: One Shot. She’s so gorgeous! I need to lie down. 

a creation that was inspired by another one (add both your creation and the one that inspired it!: I can’t really think of a gifset that I’ve made that was specifically inspired from another. At least not one I’ve made yet. I do have a few on my to-do list. 

a favorite creation created by someone else (in no particular order): 

The Right Partner: A Love Story by @sersi

Steve and Peggy in the Infinity Saga by @paulrudde

From “letter to my daughter” by @momentofmemory

Wondertrev Secret Santa by @oswiins

some of your favorite content creators from the year: (in no particular order): 

@sersi, @momentofmemory, @kamalaskhans, @paulrudde, @padawanlost, @ben--solos, @beautifulwhensarcastic, @roboticonography, @whatelsecanwedonow, @dianaofthemyscira, @capsgrantrogers, @rhodee, @msbryceblunt & @mrgaretcarter

and for good measure, another a couple more creations of yours that you love:

Love the hat 

Steggy + the times they said 

There is another Skywalker

Steggy + conversations in the rain

Steggy + making an impression 

I understand you’re not happy with your meal

tagging: @paulrudde and anyone who wants to do this! 

#content creator year in review #long post #Laura rambles too much

[ithinkwehitametaphor]

Hey it's me - definitely a different person. I've been working from home too and spending a lot of time of Tumblr so that's probably why we are so synchronized. That and I totally stalk you for Steve gifs!!! Seriously, they make me happy.

Hi! *waves* So here is final proof. Very much two people. ^___^ Accidental synchronized tumbrling is a thing now. And I stalk your blog for the Logan and Predator gifs and photoshoot posts!!. I think that explains it. You’re my top source for all my Boyd Holbrook needs tbh. :D  Glad you like my gifs! <3 The current plan is to finish gifing Javi for the last episode of season 2 and then going back to season 1 for whatever I missed and some more Steve!!! I feel I definitely underappreciated him a bit at first. :3

#replies #ionlyjoinedforboydholbrook

[warriorteam1924]

since everything’s a little weird right now & most seem to be bored I thought we could play a quarantine game 💘 answer the following! 1. how has your day been? 2. what is the last thing that made you smile? 3. what’s keeping you entertained these days? 4. if you are in some kind of quarantine/self isolation: is there anything you’d like to achieve in this time? 5. post a selfie! (if your comfortable with that) 6. last but not least send this to some mutuals to keep the game going 🥰

Well, thanks for thinking of me, even if I’m not bored at all, I don’t even have time to do all the things I want to do in a day but let’s do it.

 1. how has your day been? I’m really not a person to complain, but I’m also sincere. This day is shit. I’m deeply pissed by some behaviors and I’ve got a massive headache almost blinding me. But my babies never gave up, nor did Fred. The show must go on.

 2. what is the last thing that made you smile? I had to take a nap and I recall I dreamt about Brook. This was great.

 3. what’s keeping you entertained these days? My random days have not really changed. I’ve been cooking, cleaning, writing, gifing, playing bass, talking a lot with my sis, trying to find a damn job, but I guess it’s going to be even harder now. I’m trying my best to support my tumblr pals if they are having a hard time, since I’ve been given a great support when I’ve lost my babies.

 4. if you are in some kind of quarantine/self isolation: is there anything you’d like to achieve in this time? Well yes, we are in quarantine here. Update 2, my sis and I still not have killed each other after 10 days lol. Seriously, I’m doing the very same as usual. Maybe if I could catch up with all the fics I have not read and commented yet this would be nice.

 5. post a selfie! Nope, my face is not interesting enough and I don’t take selfies when I’m on my own on the picture. Here are my babies instead, cause they are worth it :

 6. last but not least send this to some mutuals to keep the game going : It’s not as if I’ve not been supporting many of them since the quarantine started (at different times and all around the world), but since I’ve began, let’s finish this properly. 💖💜

#warriorteam1924 got asked and answered #from @painandpleasure86

[pierregasly]

You okay? You haven’t been very active last days

Awe, thanks for asking. It’s kinda a bit long but here it goes.

Pretty much in April my ex broke up with me over the phone during quarantine literally just throwing away the whole future we had planned because he’s chosen without mentioning it to be at all to go to a different country for Uni and he wanted to have “a fun summer” without depression of having us both saying goodbye. We’d been dating for fifteen months, talking for sixteen and it was a really really passionate relationship with a lot of high emotion from both parties. However, a lot of high emotion leads to volatility which is why the last six months of our relationship was really toxic and brought my mental health down to a point where I had so much anxiety I went down from 46 to 41 kilos just purely because of not eating due to stress.

Moving on, our relationship became sorta toxic because of my ex. He has a huge ego, is very competitive and we’re both really into debating. He started to make everything a competition between us and he would go off on the smallest things. Like he would call be every hour or thirty minutes when I was hanging out with friends or I wanted him to smoke hookah a little less and he broke our agreement but when I tried weed one time he went literally ballistic. No, it wasn’t an abusive relationship. The atmosphere was just... really toxic. We both were on the debate team and I kept winning while he kept losing and he always sorta resented me for that, like he felt so threatened that I was doing better than him in school... or debate... or in my personal life.

So yeah, us breaking up was a good thing but it doesn’t stop there. We really really loved each other. And love doesn’t conquer all, you know? Anyways, he broke up with me in early April and didn’t contact me for two whole months. We went from talking everyday to talking zero times in two months. However, the next time we did meet he proposed a meeting under the guise of he needed to get his stuff. So he shows up at my house, gets his stuff and then stays for three hours pleading and saying like he made a mistake, a rash mistake and I kinda told him... no. And honestly it was the hardest thing I ever had to do because we still loved each other so much but he hadn’t changed at all. So, that following week, we had a house party for graduating seniors. The entire night, he made out with one of my friends in front of me because he wanted to make sure I had a really shitty night. And yeah... it wasn’t nice. But I had a lot of guys trying to get with me and, we’ll, his best friend of ten years was one of them. His best friend made a move and I owed nothing to my ex so I went with it, we’re friends after all.

He isn’t really close with his best friend anymore because he’s really jealous and hurt his best friend did that. Which I understand but at the end of the day... all his friends were pissed at him at this party because he kept getting jealous whenever I was with a guy and just staying in my own lane even tho HE broke up with me and shit over the phone... The following week at another party that he wasn’t invited to, he removed me from our last media of contact we still had each other on and I didn’t hear from him for another month and a half.

Flash to my birthday. August 3. It’s 1 am and he called me out of the blue wishing me a happy birthday. I really wasn’t... thrilled. At this point I was finally okay. I had moved on mentally (of course your heart still stays with the people you once loved), I had a great friend group around me, I finally was able to start gifing and writing again because I felt really... happy. Really good about myself. Like the best I’ve felt about myself in like a decade. I even got my weight up to 45 kilos after going on a diet to gain weight! And my ex’s entire phone call I was speaking so strong but my fucking body was shaking so hard. I know it sounds stupid but I was so fucking scared because I had finally rebuilt myself and I knew this person would have the power to bring me right back down.

On my birthday, we saw each other. We hung out at his house, I spent the night. He looked so fucking miserable. He had so much guilt and regret over what he did to me in his eyes but it seemed like he spent the entire day just trying to make it up to me. It broke my fucking heart because he kept asking me to be more affectionate and I told him no, he’s not my boyfriend and after all he did, he doesn’t deserve it. He would kinda try to... play the field. As in he would say things like “I love you” and then see my reaction and then base his next action off of that reaction. He said “I love you”, I made a face, and he played it off like a joke. He was trying to take the upper hand as usual but I didn’t let him. When I left he told me if I ever wanted to hang out, we could.

I didn’t take that too seriously but my dad left for a few days last week so my brother invited a friend and I invited my ex just to drink and have a good time. At the end of the day, my ex said we’re friends even tho he’s the one who cut me off. My ex’s problem is that he really wants desperately he get back together, to be together again because he still loves me but I don’t want that to happen. Maybe in the future when he’s a changed and better person but for now like... no. Even tho it really hurts. Anyways we had a perfect night. I basically left loose and told him all that he did wrong... that what he did really hurt me... that he’s selfish, unkind and takes people for granted. I told him I pitied him because he sees the world so negatively when there is so much beauty around him. He didn’t try and argue... he just got really sad and told me he understood. He also told me he loved me and didn’t take it back. His eyes looked so fucking crushed because he knew how badly he fucked up. He was throwing compliments about my to my brother, he couldn’t keep his hands off me and when he held me, his fist would clench in my shirt like he was desperately trying to keep hold of me.

We’re essentially just two people who understand that he has to go through a lot of change before we can ever be right for each other again. We love each other so much but even he admitted... he’s just not right for me and he’s not good. He wants to change but he just doesn’t know how, how he’s acted is really all that he knows. Anyways... he spent the night and I kinda knew it was going to be the last time we see each other for months, maybe years, maybe a decade. And he just layed in bed like he really really didn’t want to have to go even though he knew he was going to have to. That’s it. We left on good terms. He’s still in love with me.

To answer your question, for the first time in a long time and I’m just going to be honest. I’m not okay. I’m really not okay. He’s right, he’s not good for me. But it really sucks that his selfish actions and his decisions just did that... to us. I will always love him but I’m not in love with him anymore. We click so well, and we’ve both never found another person whether family, friend or more intimate that we’ve each clicked for. Who knows... maybe one days I’ll meet a better version of him and I’ll take him back when I see he’s more mature and changed. But for now... I was okay until this month when he just decided to slip back into my life. And it doesn’t feel fair. It doesn’t feel fucking fair that I rebuilt myself and I was doing the best I ever had just for him to come back into my life and remind me of his presence.

It’s not like I had forgotten about things like how his hair feels, his accent, his scent or his mannerisms... I hadn’t. Him being around just reminded me of them. And I was doing so well. I had truly moved on mentally in life and was doing the best I ever had. I cry maybe once a year... and now I’m crying literally five times a day because I miss him so much and it hurts having to realize that we’re both strangers who are going to live completely separate lives. It hurts so bad I can’t even explain it really and the writer in me just doesn’t idk.

I’m really sorry for his rant. I have a lot on my chest. I really really am not doing okay. I basically went back two months recovery, back to a point where I can barely get myself to do anything and I just feel really hurt. Its not the worst thing that ever happened to me... but I lost my best friend and a boyfriend, a person I loved so fucking dearly and had all those passionate cliche movie first loved with. It’s the worst thing too knowing that we both still love each other so much but we know it’s not right. It’s not right for us. I can’t be there to help him along the way and he needs to find himself and his own path in life. Love doesn’t conquer all but I think that’s okay. You know? I have to delete a good quali lap for a chance at a great one. I was really looking forward to going to college, starting over and getting out of this city full of memories... but I can’t because my Uni is online first semester so I’m still here. Again... sorry for the rant.

#flood pressles box #sincerely anonymous #personal presley

[crossgartered]

P5R liveblog (5/?)

(Officially meeting the new kid) (Also, questions about Sae’s judgement)

Operation Maidwatch. *sigh*

I can hang out with ryuji at night now!!!!!!!!

Ah, the classic protect-girl-from-aggressively-creepy-rando trope. Ah well. I'm kind of glad that it means that the protag definitely, canonically would do the same thing as he did in the beginning

Ooh, new content new content

Wait, do people actually call him Doc? Weird. I didn't imagine that'd actually catch on.

...can you cook, Maruki?

I SEE HARU HELLO HARU

The gym shorts look kind of strange when paired with the bulky looking zipped long sleeved jacket

? I'm not with my friends? Who am I with? DO I GET TO MEET HARU PLEASE??? well obvs I'm with yoshizawa but like who are the other 2

Oh, but if I'm with yoshizawa then there's that npc girl who I'm with as well, since she was excited about being in her group

So basically the nocs are gonna fuck off bc they're scared of me and then yoshizawa and I get to talk

But this is speculation that will very quickly be proven right or wrong so let's keep playing

Oh, I'm with 3 npcs who aren't doing anything. Great.

OMFG HEDJDKDKD please tell me that was giffed to hell and back

Oh, neat, Ann showing off : )

RYUJI IS A GOOD KID

HARU HARU HARU HARU HARU

Oh, so he theoretically can cook.

(gifed? Gif-ed? How to spell)

Idk if this is a cultural thing or not but yoshizawa really puts a lot of thought into thanking and apologizing 'properly' for what seem like, for the most part, little things

Yeah, that's old news, yoshizawa.

Elephant tusk trafficking??? Rumors are wild

Oh, boy, there is no way Sae can spin this without an incredible reach, unless she talks about something other than acrobatic prowess

Faith, huh. Well, I don't know this arcana, but I can spot what the 'sin' probaby is in this card pretty easily. I wonder which deck this arcana comes from. I wonder what it'll mean in context of yoshizawa.

Wait HOLDUP she only has 5 ranks?????????

Her phone's been acting up recently...?

So she's definitely dead, right? Right?

Man either she's not available a lot or she's only available for a limited time I'm nervous why does she only have 5 ranks

We probably have until before the casino palace calling card. So, before November 25

Ah, that lines up with Maruki only being available until November, too

Hmm

Hey I love yoshida with like all my soul. I really appreciate how he's changed. I wish the best for him.

The sun and probably the tower also are the biggest stretches Sae makes, I feel like. Magician - tools, fine. Also party member but that one levels up automatically (and is not a known person so). And Yusuke was obvs the graphic designer for the new logo, so his being mentioned in his rank start makes sense. Ann had a weird one but she's a party member so I'll forgive it. I'll forgive the party member ones since it's pretty clear we have a group. Plus Sae is going for confirmation bias or whatever since. Y'know. Anyway.

Hierophant, amazingly direct. As for Justice, I don't remember what she says, but that's a bit of a special case anyway.

Fortune...that has to be a reach, right? Like, seriously. I don't remember it, though.

Hanged Man - A suspicious amount of weapons and guns. Even though they're model guns, they've also got some wear and tear like they've seen use. And if threats/blackmail are part of phantom thief methodology... I can see why she'd be interested. Not too bad.

Death - I guess. It is best to have a specialist for medical care. That actually almost needs an expert, unlike most of these other things. But the assumption of the need for medical care is a little strange.

Temperance - ehhhhhhhhh. This is something about having a teacher covering for them, right? I mean I /guess/, but...

Devil - a journalist? To influence public opinion? (Esp considering how wild it gets). And also get info about corruption from? THATS ACTUALLY REALLY GOOD AND MAKES A LOT OF SENSE.

Tower - ...*sigh*. Sae, I know how to """handle""" model guns bc I play a lot of Gun About. Are you going to interrogate a little kid about how he """obvs learned from an expert""" how to """handle model guns"""??

Star - yes, very good. A strategist makes a lot of sense. Not sure why you would suspect someone not part of the thieves to be the strategist except that you already know all our "accomplices'" names. Well, it still makes sense, though.

Moon - of course. Of course. Super valid, Sae.

Sun - ehhhhhhh. You could take it into a psych-based influencing of minds via persuasion or something, I guess, but she does even worse and says that I need yoshida for writing calling cards. Which we've done twice before we even talk to him.

It pleases me immensely to think of that one art/meme where, upon forming an sl with Sae, it flashes back and she's like "AND THEN SOMEONE HAD TO INTERROGATE YOU! WHO WAS IT. ANSWER ME!"

Anyway....

Hey, I wonder if Mishima did a site redesign when the Phantom Thieves logo changed. I think he did, actually, right? At least it used to have a white bg iirc. Or maybe I just don't remember correctly. And then maybe Ryuji pointed Yusuke at the Phansite and went ham. Hmm.

I wonder what Yusuke thought of the old logo.

WOW that got off on a tangent

#p5r #p5r liveblog #spoilers #persona 5 royal #long post #this one gets emotional at video games