#aging life care start up

[momlovesyoubest]

Solo Agers Are Vulnerable to Social isolation

Solo agers are vulnerable to social isolation and mental health problems, particularly if they lack close family or friendship ties. Also, known as Elder Orphans, Solo Agers represent about 22% of older adults in the United States. Solo agers are vulnerable to social isolation or are at risk of doing so in the future, according to a 2016 study. “This is an often overlooked, poorly understood…

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#aging life and geraitric care manager #Aging Life Care Association #aging life care start up #assessing for quality of life #black american geriatric care managers #black american social workers #Black Entrepreneurs #Black geriatric care managers #Black Nurse Entrepreneurs #Black start-up geriatric care management #Black travel nurses #care management business courses #elder depression #elder orphans #emotional quality of life #expert care manager #expert in care management #friendship and quality of life #geriatric care manager start up #isolation and elders #loneliness #Solo Agers #Solo Agers and friendship #Solo Agers and quality of Life #Solo Agers and social networks #start-up geriatric care management aging life care manager #training care managers

[lunarharp]

more phoenix wright situations

#ace attorney tag #maybe i should tag this narumitsu or something. but i dont really care. #gearing up to rereading/illustrating bits of my fic i suppose...i think nick really is too dense to realise he's in love with edgeworth #without some scheming fop trying to intrude. i love villains like kristoph..villains can be fun..witnessing their pathetic folly.. #or more like edgeworth would never have mentioned his feelings ever in his life if he wasn't sure phoenix reciprocates. #i want to see it this way because Falling in love during childhood with the person you're going to end up with. is not relatable #there have to be Situations that make you Realise. #as with orufrey i adore the idea of people not working out their romance with that person until their 30s+ #but... i mean. even with orufrey i often think how alaira could be qifrey's ex. and oru having been pursued by noble fops through his work #there is that delicate sliver of time before orufrey start living together that such believable situations could have happened. #Then the relief of politely and amicably extricating themselves from those untenable situations #the idea of falling in love age 7 and saving your first kiss for age 35 or something is all very well but more relatable is #people realising how they really feel whilst trying something that ends up feeling wrong. #The comfort and joy of living with your dearest one as if it's platonic - much preferable to trying anything more with anyone else. #But i doubt i will ever portray that or mention it further. it is indeed very delicate to me. #and i really am an OTP FOR LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! kind of person who can barely bear to consider this anyway...NOT a polyshipper i'm afraid ! #so i wouldn't mind either if they do have their first kiss in their lives age 35 with each other either. I would not mind that at all. #i love bi/gay couples apparently... bi father figures & their grumpy gay men waiting for them to work it all out... #not used to using colour in comic-style drawings..or at all..so this is messy and awkward looking..but colour is refreshing #i imagine i will go back to witch hat art soon btw. my destiny in life. #i still remember writing my nrmt fic expecting to write their first kiss & then partway through twas like Umm No. They have kissed prior. #does that really line up with this comic though... i think i had their early dinner dates/first kiss BEFORE disbarment. #so i guess this comic doesn't line up with my ficverse.... No..... U___U Oh well. sorry kris! <3

[tennessoui]

where’s my toxic dark academia au where the Jedi Order is a prestigious private university for rich kids who are all a different flavor of beautiful and fucked up, and Anakin is the kid they let in on scholarship once every a few years and he comes in scrappy and defensive and in love with the daughter of the family who is sponsoring him (and maybe half-adopted him when he was 10 so it’s a bit fucked up all around)

and he meets this pretentious dickbag of a student on his hall who is so cold and aloof that anakin can’t stand him, this guy obi-wan who’s so beautiful and untouchable and who sees right through him

I imagine they fuck in the most explosive way where they’re in the middle of a very loud fight in some bathroom in some rich kid’s house and neither is sober, and obi-wan says some awful shit about anakin being in love with Padmé and if his adoptive parents knew they probably would wish they hadn’t adopted him and anakin says some awful shit about how obi-wan’s been sent to boarding schools all his life cause his father never wanted him, and it starts as a fight but they’re just punching each other with their mouths and probably crying too

#Kit’s silly lil AUs #cw: drugs #(maybe these tags do not go together lol) #obikin #give me that toxic same age obikin #scholarship kid anakin in a world of burnouts and trust fund kids #trying to belong #maybe after their first time obi-wan decides he’s gonna take him under his wing #and show him the high society fucked up kids ropes #only there’d be so many scenes where anakin slowly finds out how fucked obi-wan is #and he slowly starts caring more and more #in a way that genuinely scares him so much #that he leaves before he graduates?? #ends up writing a book about it ten years later (all names changed) #and obi-wan finds him because in the book he is not shy about calling obi-wan the great fucked up love of his great fucked up life #lol I guess this has very little in common with Star Wars

[softshuji]

Any men out there wanna pretend to be my bf to get my parents off my case about marriage? I am so so serious right now.

#my mom gave me a really really lonf lecture and upset me because her and my dad want me to start thinking about settling down ans getting #married. again. cos this comes up all the time. ans I reiterated that i do wanna marry and have kids. i know im 26 years old why do they' #think im also not aware of this??? like i suddenly forgot my own age and have my head in the clouds all the time. and i got so heated cos i #said they only believe in that in theory. in reality neither of them have accepted the idea od my leaving home or the idea of mw being with #a man. and they start freaking out if they even find out i talk to them so to say they want me to get married is so fucking naive #ans when i mentioned this and that they're more than ok w mt brothers talking tp women she said that if i wanted to settle down she could #talk to dad and they could “go about finding someone for me” and I've never been so pissed #i got so upset. why does everyone keep saying this to me. as if anyone my dad knows could ever be a half decent man #and the truth is they don't care if im in a happy marriage they've accepted that i won't be they only care that im gone and saving face in #front of family. that's all. it's always reputation it's always “what will people say?” #not once did love come up. not once did shw even imply that i should marryfor love #or that they hope i love someone and marry them. because they're more happy with the idea of me marrying for the sake of it than #they are at the idea of me finding genuine lovw #im not a fucking broodmare im not here to push out babies for the sake od reputation. #and then i said nor being married isn't the end of the world and she said “it's important that you settle down” #and i said im unwavering in my principles. she can call mw high maintenance like she loves doing but I'm not wavering on the #kind of man i want to be with and when i do marry him i want it to bw genuine. because be loves me and vice versa not because im ticking off #somethin from a damn checklist to appease them. and if being unwavering on my principles means staying unmarried then so be it. #my obligations are to god and myself and that's it #and y'know what??? i am in love with a boy already #and yet they don't care that i wanna be in love at all. no im just a puppet to follow a certain narrative in life live according to evergone #else has and that's it. #im done. #and then she tried to apologise by getting me a slice of cake and that somehow made me feel worse. #i dont want an apology. i want to be heard and actually listened to for once. i want someone to ask what i want. to actually give a shit #and love me cos it's me. not cos im some thing to further an agenda. or some toy or puppet that does your bidding. #is it so much??? to just want to be loved in return? to marry and live according to how i want to?? ans not want anyone to make these #decision's for me? #ruined my whole day.

[doodlboy]

Yk realistically if the om bros were fucked up like demons should be, they wouldn't be that disturbed by bloodlust el's personality.

However, I think the terror and angst comes from the fact that they lived with him his whole life, and for the most part, he was very passive and calm and never immediately resorted to violence, so to see [what used to be] their human revel in bloodshed is.. unsettling.

#bc they loved him for being human #being kind!! he was their connection to the entirety of humanity bc he loved people. bc he was human #they knew he was going to die eventually bc he's mortal. to them his life feels like minutes passing by 2 their immortality #[the universe where he turns in2 bloodlust el is the 1 where solomon can't reproduce the accidental immortality spell he used on himself] #[so el dies of old age after a full life of the devildom and his partners and magic] #so- imagine you die. your life was full and complex and loving #and [for a reason i haven't decided on yet] heaven/the celestial realm wipes your memory of all of that shit and u turn in2 a blank slate #2 be molded and shaped into something befitting an “angel” #then u start getting your memory back and you damn near start another war bc you're so pissed off you fight god & actually land a hit #which gets u cast out of the heaven and when you go crashing into hell you land smack dab in the middle of the garden #that belongs 2 the ppl who once loved you #but when u crashed you fucked up your head and now you're “wrong” #different from the human these people want you to be. and you hide away. they make you feel like a monster when you can't stop it #and get imprisoned for it. then used as essentially a court jester/executioner bc the prince needed to do *something* with you #fucked up #they wouldn't care if he was just another demon. but he's what remains of the human they loved yk #so it's more disturbing #anyway long ramble over #elliot rambles #obey me #obey me mc #obey me demon mc #obey me demon oc #avatar of bloodlust #demon elliot oc

[thriftdyke]

.

#the sun went down at 4 pm and I am once again having an existential crisis #I went to a bookstore and saw stupid romance book covers and started thinking about how I’m probably gonna ‘die alone’ #whatever the fuck that means #I don’t KNOW okay I don’t know if I’m aromantic or just too traumatized and avoidant to be capable of intimacy. but I have no friends and #I’m lonely as fuck #and I don’t want to date but I want someone to be committed to me and I want someone to fuck but I don’t trust people and I #am pretty sure if I fucked someone I would burst into tears bc of how long its been since I’ve been touched #I want a family. like that is one thing I know for sure I don’t know exactly what that even means or looks like #but I want a FAMILY. and not the one I was born with #I don’t mean kids I mwan commitment and fucking. People #and the universe is not on my fucking side girl. she’s not I don’t care what you say #I thought I had a found family in college and look where that is now. dust #and I’m 25 years old #and I’m missing so many milestones #and maybe it doesn’t matter maybe dating and fucking do not give you worth yeah yeah okay #but this is not the life I thought I would have at this age. and I feel like I should be entitled to grieve that #not like I want to. I want to be normal and I want to be over it. #to be perfectly fucking honest. I wish I could wake up tomorrow #and fall in love with someone and have a boring normal happily ever after. #I wish I could be the person who’s capable of that and I know that’s a naive and childish and unwoke desire to have #but I’m just being so real with you chief. I do not know how to live in this world being who I am. #and I don’t want to fucking be alone. #not because it makes me less worthy but because I’m just fucking sick of being lonely. okay. #anyway. I’m probably deleting this #p

[justacupcakewithablog]

Because I can't get over it

Ppl on this site: Yeah when you hit 50 you should kill yourself before you get to old so you're not a burden on your loved ones or to society

Me: Okay but like...you saying that is like not only agiest but ableist right? Cause like you do know there are young people that have to deal with the same issues older people do? And if your solution is to just kill off the old people that mindset also means you'd have to kill off the younger people too? There are young people who can't get around or need care takers and help doing tasks like bathing or going to the bathroom, it's not just an old people thing...

#ALSO PEOPLE AGE DIFFERENTLY #my dad is almost 60 and can take care of himself #my grandma is almost 80 and take care of themselves #LIKE THE SOLUTION YOU START UP IS VERY FLAWED #it sounds sooo fascist the way ypu people talk and dressing up a 'lol funny' like #not everyone has shitty parents/grandparents #or olderly friends #some may want to see them have a full and happy life and be taken care of #AND EVEN IF THEY WHERE LIKE NOT THE NICEST PEOPLE #WHY GIVES YOU THAT RIGHT TO KILL THEM OFF CAUSE THEY DIDN'T MAKE THE RIGHT CONNECTIONS #there are some people with mental disabilities or issues that make it difficult to keep and maintain relationships #its just so very fucking ableist on top of the ageism #not everyone is gonna be in there 20's forever #not everyone in there 20's is able bodied #your solution can't just be 'kill off the weak' #because what kind of society is that?! #ageism #ableism #ableist

[dykedivorce]

if any other bitch in konoha had been gay apart from sasuke none of this would have happened to my son naruto.

#pussy from the turbotron edgelord 3000 and his whole life went up in flame. NOT worth it #no but fr it's insane how he bamboozled every fan into thinking he was so interesting and cool and badass when . #at the point im at in shippuden hes by far the least interesting of the main characters. one track mind (vengeance) and no depth beyond that #like the other characters rn : sakura coming in to her own ; finding her path and her strength + sharing a connection so deep with naruto #over their common loss that they both just Know although they absolutely cant talk about it #yamato: the only survivor of orochimaru's monstrous experiments on children; kakashi's stand in thats so different from kakashi #it makes you wonder what it would have been like with him as their teacher from the start; #a mystery thats clearly trying his best but whose mission truly is A Lot #SAI: A BRAINWASHED SPY A PAWN FOR A SECRET ORGANISATION WHO CLINGS TO HIS HUMANITY NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES HES BEEN PUNISHED FOR IT #WHO FELL IN LOVE WITH NARUTO FOR MAKING HIM REALIZE HOW DEEP THINGS COULD BE FELT AND HOW DEEP RELATIONSHIPS COULD RUN #WHO HAS BEEN DRAWING A BOOK FOR HIS DEAD BROTHER FOR YEARS EVEN IF HE'S FORGOTTEN WHAT HIS BROTHER LOOKS LIKE #WHO DECIDED TO SPARE SASUKE BECAUSE HE'S LOVED. WHO JUST WANTS TO LEARN HOW TO LIVE A HUMAN LIFE. #MOST AUTISTIC CODED CHARACTER OF ALL TIMES HAS NEVER SUCCESSFULLY MASKED A DAY IN HIS LIFE. #sasuke: sasuke #anyway. im not touching on naruto because i could be here for days #BUT while sasuke on his own so far is very whatever. the narusasu dynamic is truly one for the ages #bc i just saw the ep where sasuke manages to see kyuubi inside naruto and wooshes him away and it's very like. #oh so hes literally seeing naruto's demons and banishing them even as hes telling naruto they dont matter to each other anymore. #oh ok cool cool cool cool this feels normal and not something to obsess over #jesus christ why am i typing all this. who here cares #naruto thoughts

[savageday6]

♡

#starting to believe that maybe all this while i've been punishing myself by isolating myself from people who care abt me #like there have been times when i felt that friends just didnt care. also been times i felt too ashamed to ask for help or seek company #but i think i just gotta give myself grace like . i'm human. it's fine to seek platonic connection n a listening ear. it's Normal #anw so!! i met my best friend for yoga (for the first time!) yday n we talked SO MUCH!! we talked about life careers sexuality relationshi #i also told her about smth that has been plaguing me for two days. specifically my ex ahgkhgjgjns n . talking about it really helped me #what a shocker!!!! that talking about your worries n feelings helps!!! ksggfjsnjkgnjkndg #n i learnt so many new things about her... we usually meet in a group n it's always just a roulette of quick life nuggets #but yday i realised that i never really found out what she's really been up to. i've not had a one-to-one conversation with her in ages!! #thats crazy considering that we're such good friends.... omg. n so it really made me see how much i craved that connection #n how much i'm tormenting myself by isolating myself and depriving myself of the joy that i tend to get from deep social connections :( #n i think maybe it's time to start putting that past self who was too ashamed to reach out for help behind me #idk its been really nice talking to an old friend n being 100% comfortable u know?? it made me realise how much i missed deep connections #my point is i've missed this!!!!! maybe i should do it more!!!!! #personal

[lith-myathar]

.

#i joke about it and all but like. i cannot emphasize enough what an impact it had on me to be uhhhhhb #micro-institutionalized in the way that i was for the first 14 years if my life #and i am honestly going to count the time i soent in ''elementary'' school bc it wasn't a normal school. it was a charter school #that began as a parent organized alternative and swiftly devolved into an authoritarian nightmare #a bunch of people who were simply not ready to educate children let alone ''problem'' children #of which there were MANY because that school got all the kids who had been turned out of public school for behavioral issues #there were hardline rules about literally everything. normal childhood behavior was pathologized and punished and as a kid #you had no way to understand WHY #and so many of your peers were having problems because ofc those ''problem'' kids were typically severely traumatized #or were actively being abused #so even if it wasn't happening TO you you were being exposed to it in a hundred little ways every day #so i was confused and miserable all the time AND was struggling academically bc i had undiagnosed adhd #(or possibly just trauma?? i honestly neither know nor care which came first at this point) #so my mom pulled me and my brother out. him at 11 and me at 6 and said ''i'll just do it myself'' and #raised us in a way that wasn't religious but resembled evangelical or lds stuff #i couldn't watch commercial tv or listen to popular music bc my parents didn't want me exposed to what they considered inappropriate #and while i still had extracurriculars i was always the odd one out bc i had no exposure to pop culture or normal socialization #for my age group #it resulted in me always feeling alone and like i didn't belong. and since most of my social life was my parents and their friends #that was the perfect soup for adultification #i was fine with adults. put me with my peers and i was a mess #it made the transition to high school incredibly difficult but i DID make it #but that was only 4 years still in an institution. everything began to unravel once i tried to move into anything resembling ''real life'' #and then my dad's suicide which was a major trauma in early adulthood which only made my mom's grip on us tighten #i did get to START life until 26. not really. and it's just been a game of catch up for the last 5 years #and im so *angry* at the unfairness of it all. at the time and experience and milestones that were taken from me. at how i blamed myself #for it for so many years and the problems i developed because of it all. dissociation and substance abuse and suicidality #the fear that still has a death grip on me #the courage required to just exist #it's *exhausting*

[daz4i]

i know aging isn't the end of the world and 24 isn't that old and life isn't a race etc etc etc. however,

#i think a big reason i feel so bad abt being this age is ppl told me this is when things start to get better #and i still feel the same way i did as a teenager so. well. is it really 😐 #(being on t probably isn't helping but it's been over 3 years already so... not an excuse i think) #but I'm also physically aging like the reason i barely upload selfies anymore is i see myself getting uglier every day #despite fighting for my life to at least take care of my face and hair...... can't fight the passage of time 😔 #+ ofc. my (younger) friends being way more sorted out than i am on every level #again ik life isn't a race but. it can't help but hurt to know I'm still behind literally everyone i know #and my excuses for that aren't even good. bc other disabled ppl my age are also more sorted out than i am #other depressed ppl other borderlines other autistics etc etc. hell these are also my irl friends 😭 #and it's dumb. bc feeling like i wasted my life isn't really pushing me to change that now. just makes me want to die even more #(bc i mean what's the point. i will never catch up. I'm still at the starting line AND i move so slow it doesn't even count) #(i don't have a single milestone ppl my age have not even finishing high school which is like. the bare minimum) #(and it sucks bc i also know i have potential i KNOW i can do shit in theory i know I'm smart and got skills. but i can't put it to use) #(and now this is turning into less of a thing abt age and just generally me talking abt how i wasted the last 24 years) #this was more of a stressed rant abt how I'm turning ugly and feeling super old but well. it all boils down to self loathing at the end 👍 #vent #negative // #ask to tag #sorry for being so depressing all day oof ik i already said it before but it's been a rough couple of months #(nothing happened my brain just needs to get flushed down the toilet ^_^) #edit: i think. part of my panic about aging. is bc as a kid i was used to being the youngest everywhere #i was the youngest in my class bc i started school a year early. i was the youngest in acting school bc they don't normally accept teenagers #and in addition to that as an adult but before starting t i was always told that i LOOK young too #but now ik i look like I'm in my 20s. and it's killing me that i aged this much in so little #i wonder if shaving my beard will help but i don't wanna get misgendered 😐😐😐 and rn it's the only thing guarding me from that

[immamapletreekid]

i am the most predictable person with the most predictably pathetic tastes in the history of predictable pathetic taste

#give me a character that is just in it for a good time. problem and conflict free #living their best life unbothered. moisturized. thriving and absolutely glowing #but is also like an actual big deal. has a reputation making them equal parts feared and admired #and give them the weirdest most incredibel fashion choices. bonus points id they are goth #and give off vampire wine aunt vibes #sprinkle in a pinch of middle aged man who somehow ends up the adoptive father of 2 and #pls he is so unserjous. he is living his best life in that fucking tiny ass boat. great unit of a black bejeweled sword on his back #lace sleeves and high heels sailing across the ocean chasing a pirate fleet bc he wanted to kill some time #he is peak gothic wine aunt malewife energy to me #HE LIVES IN A FUCKING CASTLE???? ? HIS FAVOURTIE FOOD IS RED WINE HE LIKES TO READ HE ONLY WEARS A SHIRT WHEN HES NOT WORKING #wheb i started this series i did not know who he was #and my predictions for top 3 favorhite characters were in no particular order zoro law and ace #now two od those i have not met yet. but for now #the tentative big 3 are mihawk nami and usopp #nami bc i care about her i adore her i cherish her i fuckijg love her she is so silly #usopp bc the vibes are immaculate #mihawk bc. actuslly no explanation needed im not foing to embarras myself further #but also i love all the strawhats ive met so far #they are one big happy family and they love each other and would die& kill for each other and they have a place to belong next to each other #and i think thats beautiful. #rambling about stuff

[toomuchdickfort]

Vent abt smth that gets on my Nerves

#tried bringing up to mom like. hey how could I bring up coming out to family. and she was like visibly uncomfortable so I was like dw I’m no #gonna like try to ruin Christmas with it or some shit I’m just. nervous u see. and I’m sat there anxiety rambling abt it because oh my god. #and she pulls out the fucking. ‘can’t you just be a person?’ mom I am a person already. the problem is. the PROBLEM IS. EVERYONE THINKS I AM #AND THUS TREATS ME AS A GIRL. like oh my god. #vent #it’s not a huge vent like if it comes up I’m not gonna Lie moms discomfort abt the matter be damned. #but like. ‘can’t you just be a person’ is what she says every fucking time it comes up. like mom. mother. mi madre. do you realize how much #of an insult that feels like when you say it EVERY TIME I bring up trans anxieties. or dysphoria. or any of the ways my transness affects my #life. like being trans doesn’t make me less of a person oh my god. but also frankly I don’t have the patience to be nice about getting into #things and I don’t have the heart to hurt her about it and even if I did have one of those I don’t have the patience to hold her hand #through all this shit. like I gave up having mom on this journey ages ago do you know how painful it is to un-give up on something that #immense. it’s hard and it hurts and it burns and it’s like. giving up to begin with didn’t hurt too bad- it’s cutting off the festering #wound. but. but then. you find out that. you can in fact work with that. and suddenly you have to try and clean the wound. care for it and #wrap it and do it all over again. and god it hurts. and. I’m not entirely sure I want to un-give up all the way on this? it’s. a lot #like I get and I appreciate that she’s trying to do. something. in theory at least. she avoids the subject when I bring it up and all but #cringed when I brought up coming out to her side of the family. she calls me my deadname and her daughter more than she did before she said #she would try. and I don’t have the energy to uncover that wound enough to start cleaning it. I’m just letting it sit there because frankly #it’ll be such a huge thing because it’s Always a huge thing when I don’t let the subject drop mega fast and I’m. I know she’s not gonna cut #me off for just being trans but GOD I want to keep ONE of my parents in my fucking life when I’m able to stand on my own two feet holy shit #and. man. it appears this is. still more of a thing than I thought it was. thats. annoying and inconvenient

[cuteniaarts]

In another world, fate was just a little bit kinder

#my art #artists on tumblr #the legend of korra #original characters #sotrl midori #sotrl haya #seeds of the red lotus #look I was feeling extremely emotional recently. and thought about how different life would be for my OCs if Haya was good #and I'm a sucker for AUs like that. it's spiritually healing. so of course I had to draw something for it #I originally wanted to draw a companion piece for suiren too but then thought it was just rehashing the idea #and I draw Suiren a lot already anyways so decided to just take the excuse to draw adorable little Midori and run with it #I have quite a few thoughts about an AU like this too. it starts out like sotrl does. haya gives them the cold shoulder and is kinda mean #but then the news of the rl's imprisonment reach gaoling. haya is shellshocked at first. distances herself and sends the girls to their room #pretends she can't hear the crying. but really she wants to cry too because as estranged as they are. ghazan is still her little brother #she indulges late that night after she think the girls are asleep. deep buried trauma from losing her parents resurfaces #but then she hears footsteps behind her. Midori is awake. haya wants to be angry at first but finds she has no energy to #they talk a little. the warm glow of candlelight catches midori's eyes and their grey shade turns gold. she looks so much like him #haya realises Midori is even younger than ghazan was when they lost their parents. suiren is half the age haya herself was #no one cared for her and ghazan back then. she won't let history repeat itself #so she reaches for midori. heart skipping a beat when she lights up slightly. and takes her into her arms #holds her close as midori hugs her back. if she closes her eyes it almost feels like she’s 14 again. holding her brother #she swears then that she’ll be as good of a guardian to these girls as she can so they don’t end up like their parents did. like haya did #it’s a long road to unlearn her bitterness but she tries her best. it’s easier with midori who soaks in affection like a sponge #Midori’s happiness is infectious. with suiren it’s much more difficult bc the prejudice Haya holds against the swamp are still there #as is the hatred for their mother. it isn’t until the townspeople start calling Suiren a swamp rat does haya snap #she no longer cares about getting alienated from the community that barely welcomed her anyway. she will defend her niece from them all #it’s the first time she calls suiren her niece. they talk too and Haya apologises for favouring Midori and starts working on fixing it #their life together isn’t perfect. the townspeople side eye them. they can’t afford bending teachers. Haya still has to bite her tongue #but it’s so much better than what could have been had Haya let her pain consume her and started to take it out on the girls. they’re happy #I have so much more to say and theorise about when it comes to this au but alas. tag limits are a thing. so I’m leaving this here

[bumblingbabooshka]

The Pathways Novel is the holy grail of young Tuvok characterization because I can just sense so clearly through the page how insufferable he would be to talk to

#and let me tell you? insufferable IS affectionate with a million hearts drawn around it #A girl confessed her love to him and he basically grabbed her by the shoulders and said Sophie....please get ahold of yourself! #Remember WWJD!! and she has to be like '.....y e ah ok. yeah. sorry.' and then they parted ways forever #Tuvok at the monastery observing the other initiates like I'm the only one who /really/ gets what we're going for here but who am I to judge #I think the line is something like 'Tuvok despised what he thought to be the partaking in unncessary luxuries but he trusted that the elders #knew best' #I think Tuvok's life is just going through different particular types of Difficult-To-Talk-To #crybaby kid to know it all teen to wannabe priest to holier than thou initiate to when-I-was-your-age dad #then he FINALLY started chilling the hell out #AH I keep saying 'monastery' its a temple #I love Tuvok him being earnestly annoyed by others has fine-wined into dry remarks while definitely NOT rolling his eyes #Tuvok cares SO much is the thing. <3 guy who is full of not-love #Guy who makes terrible horrendous first impressions but then eventually worms his way into your heart (VERY unintentionally hes NOT trying) #It'd be funny if everyone liked T'Pel right away in contrast hehe...<3 #Tuvok's parents' characterizations in that book are NOT canon to me though #also there's a funny moment where Tuvok is complaining about how their sons are (in his opinion) not disciplined enough #and when he looks to T'Pel for her opinion she's just fallen asleep #and he considers waking her up despite the fact that she JUST gave birth before going hmm.....better not. #Wise Choice Friend HEHEHEH....g od...dumbass <3

[haemosexuality]

these past few days i have been uncharacteristically. emotionally open. w my friend and it has me thinking about how truly for all of my life i just did not expect anything from anyone

#like since i was a kid i just accepted in my head that all the ''friends'' id have were ppl who either were just putting up w me (probably #bc they had no one else and i was like. what was available) or ppl who cared ab me yeah but i was still their second or third choice #and i was just like. yeah ok. i can survive w that. like consciously i made the choice to hang out w people i knew didnt really like me #bc it was better than not having anyone to talk to #did it hurt any less when those ppl eventually stopped talking to me or i learned theyve been talking about how annoying i am to others? #no it didnt. bc i still cared about Them and had Them as my first choice. but i just thought. thats just how it is. im jist not really #likeable. so ill take what i can get #when i was like 7 or 8. i had one friend at school. and she had like some issues at home or smth idk but sometimes she would just start. #treating me badly or just ignoring me for months at a time. and its not like it deeply traumatized me or anything i honestly didmt remember #this fact until like last year but the thing is that i just. accepted it. i was just like yeah ok for half of the year or so my only friend #will act like she hates me and ill have no one to talk to. thats fine. ill just wait until next year when she likes me again. at age 7. and #now im just like what the fuck man why did i just accept that as my life. through all my childhood and then with other friends in my teen #years why did i never not once try to do better for myself. yknow? #when i was 11 and in another school my best friend suddenly started not talking to me. after a month or so of this i decided to invite her #to my house to play like we had done so several times before and she just looked at me like she was confused i was talking to her at all #and said ''why?''. and i was just like. ok. thats that i guess. genuinely why did i just accept these things #and like yeah i have friends that i feel Get me now and one i love just so much and i can tell loves me back but theyre online. i dont talk #to anyone irl. i dont know how. and im happy im so happy but im also scared that im just doomed to be extremely lonely forever irl #because i am legit just not likeable. not to be a weird a weirdo but yeah im just too different from ur average person my age i cant #connect with them in any way. and i also dont know how to talk to people or make friends or to find people that are like me. ill just #not have anyone forever #i guess #especially bc now i dont hate myself enough to hang out with people i dont like so like. i dont even have that as an option skdbskdjks #Every friend i ever made happened bc the other person reached out to me first and insisted on it. all the friendships that stuck were the #gay autistic/adhd weirdonerds who can relate to my hyperfixations and dont expect me to act Normal™. idk how to find the former group irl #and have never once iniciated a friendship. my fate is to be someone who has online friends only and exclusively #and dont even get me STARTED on the topic of having a girlfriend someday- #anyways. certified magnus archives moment