#and I can get to sleep at a better time

[anime-scarves]

Playing more TFT tonight! The current patch is a little wonky but lets have some fun anyways. 

#text #wonky is a bit of an understatement #day 1 of a patch is always a silly place lol #scarf streams #also an hour earlier than usual #8pm starting time doesnt leave me at like midnight when i'm done #and I can get to sleep at a better time #not that I will #but I could in theory

[ruporas]

good mornings throughout the travel

[ID: Two comics of Vash and Wolfwood from Trigun Maximum. The second is underneath the read more.

The first is in four panels and follows Vash and Wolfwood through hotel rooms. First, Vash and Wolfwood exit adjacent rooms, and Wolfwood has sparkles floating around him as he exclaims, “Rise and shine! Ready to go?” Vash frowns, displeased, and says, Urk— Good morning to you too.”

Next, they’re in a room with two beds. Wolfwood is awake and fully dressed. He’s sitting on the bed and smoking, back turned away from the viewer and he says, “Wake up already, sleepyhead.” Vash sits up with his eyes still closed and yawns before saying good morning. After that, they’re sharing a bed, and Wolfwood gets up and says, “Morning, sunshine. Time to get up.” His body shadows Vash from the sunlight. Vash is still lying down with a blanket draped over him as he mumbles good morning.

Finally, they’re embracing in bed, both shirtless. Sunlight shines on them, but their contact allows their shadows to drape over their faces. Vash smiles, kisses the top of Wolfwood’s head, and says, “Good morning, Wolfwood.” Wolfwood sleepily says, “Mph, g’morning, needle-noggin’,” snuggling into on Vash’s shoulder. End ID] ID CREDIT

TRIMAX Vol. 10 Spoilers under read more // bonus comic

[ID: The bonus comic starts with Vash asleep in bed, fully clothed with his hair half-black. Someone says “Good morning,” and Vash says, “Morning, Wolf—w...” He trails off as Livio, holding a plate of food, stares with abject shock.

Livio says, “I’m sorry.” Vash, smiling but sweating, says, “No, it’s my bad...” Livio repeats, “I’m sorry.” Vash says, “Geez, stop apologizing,” and cuts off Livio’s “I—” with a “Good morning, Livio.” Livio quietly mumbles, “... Good morning...”

Vash sits up from the couch he was sleeping on and looks down, thinking, “... That’s right. I won’t wake up to you anymore... I have to get used to that...” End ID]

#vashwood #vash the stampede #nicholas d wolfwood #trigun #trigun maximum #i just think. when theyre traveling for a long time together #sleeping in the same inns sleeping in the same rooms potentially as they get closer #realizing they dont need to pay the fee for 2 bedrooms if theyre comfortable fighting back to back #realizing they dont need to pay the fee for 2 beds after one night of being forced to sleep in same one since all the 2 beds rooms ran out #and being comfortable with it - and then after their feelings are shared #realizing theyd rather sleep and rest peacefully next to one another #and wake up slowly and enjoy the mundane while they can #i drew ww waking up first bc i dont imagine he sleeps much tbh. i think vash is a light sleeper too and more often than not #and vash goes to bed just bc he knows if he tries to leave ww would follow him #i also think vash never had someone stand guard for him before even if that isnt what he wants out of ww to do. but knowing that ww is #there means that he can actually sleep peacefully without worry that someones going to drop on him immediately. i think he'd get used tothat #and ww -- as he opens his heart more to vash -- gets comfortable staying in bed a little longer #sleeps a little better -- especially when they start to share a bed bc there's a warmth there that he can't help but cave into #bc he hasn't had that in a long time. #ruporas art

[mblue-art]

once again i was fueled with coffee (did not sleep the whole night) but this time i doodled college au to cope bc ofc i did (also did not feel like sleeping wooo)

#self insert #cross!sans #epic!sans #mblue art #cm #m rambles #(that tag is needed bc hoo boy u can tell i did not get sleep and is fueled by caffeine) #(do not be like me!!!!!!!!! do not deprive urself of sleep 💀💀💀) #(get a good 6-7hrs a day if u can. if 4-5hr works better for u then im not forcing u to sleep more 😤😤😤 as long as u rest well 😁👍) #(AND HYDRATE... if ur reading this try to take a sip rn 🥤) #campus au #(college au scenarios will be tagged that heehoo) #not colored just lines bby 😎😎😎 #idiots to lovers type shit where they both confide in epic n he's just chillin #waiting for the time when these dummies will finally confess to eachother themselves #(look i think it's rlly funny seeing cross be all cool calm collected in public but when he talks to epic abt his crush) #(he goes insane with a million different flustered/blushing emojis) #( 'they told me good luck on my test and gave me the nicest smile ever how was i gonna live after that' goofy ass. idiot /aff) #( 'DUDE THEY GAVE ME A MOTIVATIONAL NOTE. IN /PINK/ PAPER. ON CHOCOLATE. DOES THIS...... 😳' guys i love silly dorky cross to bits so much) #(man fucking explodes w his simping n epic just goes LMAO but he's v supportive for his bruh 💪😤) #(on the other hand my sona thinks he's sooo cool and awesome and smart and honestly fucking charming HHELLO THE TIMES WHEN HE LAUGHS AND) #(AND SMILES HELLOOO MR HANDSOME I MEAN WHATT) #( 'stars if he likes me back i wouldn't know what to do with myself. fucking EXPLODE? YIPPEE CONFETTI??' lots of flushge ) #(going ueueue at big bro epic bc they got a super massive crush on his bestie but) #(but the head is entertaining 'what-if's BUT i think kuya epic knows how to steer the thoughts away from those and smack em w teasing 😎✨) #(ultimately distracting and successfully reassuring them 😎😎😎) #(tsundere mblue no way not in here im down bad astronomically full on simping my guys) #(he might be a dumbass sometimes but he's my dumbass) (ok i'll shut up now fr) #anywayz campus au is the my highschool au but we're all adults and more tired yippeee

[birrdify]

jeez smg3 really fell for 4 there

#birdyfy art #im normal about what im working on very very NORMAL amounts of normal(GET THEM OUT OF MY SKIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #OKAY NOW THAT I HAVE. an idea. on their......ice skating outfits........comic time. COMIC COMIC COMIIICCC TIIIMMEMEEMEMEME #birdys smg4 ice skaters #smg34 #smg4 #smg4 fanart #smg3 #smg3 fanart #im about to reach new heights (i swear to god if i sleep at 4am in the morning again because of these guys) #oh smg4 would DEFINITELY go something like “why do you keep falling for me; smg3?” if he's losing an argument or something during filming #just so 3 can shut the hell up LMAO #EVEN BETTER FOUR FALLS FACE FIRST ONTO THE ICE RIGHT AFTER LMSAOAIOWAKSAO #the.....THE..the possibilities......HOU

[risenshiney]

💛🐶SCRIMBLY GOOD BOY HOURS

SKRUNKLY POTATO MOMENTS🐶💛

#oatchi #poochy #pikmin #yoshi island #super mario #drawing #fanart #PIKMIN 4 #IN 10 DAYS #WHAT CAN I SAY #IM WEAK TO SCRUNGY #only watched family play 1st and 2nd pikmin but couldn't get into it bc it seemed so STRESSFUL #but for this game i plan to make an exception #the japanese here is just onomatopoeia for barking staring and sleeping lol #oatchi looking kinda too off model but i liked how this came out ill draw him better next time waaaaa #also i finally post fandom content during its hype WHAT SWEET HECKERY IS THIS #prob not really accurate but the idea of poochy interacting w another tiny weird dog thingy made my heart a bit too full #sorry for the tag vomit i have feelings lmao

[moderndaypandora]

The LAYERS needed in a modern/human Dreamling au.  Some level of Endless family dysfunction, obviously.  Hob's family can be be dead or not, it's all good. Are they old enough to have individually gained the awareness they are off-puttingly intense and should hide it a bit at first, or still in that "no, why would I need to Elsa this" stage?

Option A is both of them trying to play it cool, like "don't scare him off" except they so badly want to go from zero to sixty.

(Death and Desire have ruthlessly drilled Dream with flashcards about how to react appropriately in situations.

Desire: it's your one-month anniversary, what do you do?

Dream: [hesitantly] NOT propose?

Desire and Death, conferring, because that's technically correct but the delivery was suspect.

Death, encouragingly: Good start. And?


Dream: a nice dinner and maybe a walk?

Desire: well done!

Death: and for a three-month anniversary?


Dream: give them a key to my flat.

Desire: [airhorn] NO. RED CARD.)

Option B makes them the classic anecdotal "my grandparents got engaged within seven days of meeting each other and still are happy together".

(Death, rubbing her temples: so you met this guy--

Dream: Hob

Death: -- Hob, and within 1 day you gave notice to the Registrar's Office and figured out the best day to get married. And Hob agreed to this?

Dream: NO.

Death: oh thank go-

Dream: Hob SUGGESTED this.

Death: . . .

Dream: are you going to be a witness or not?

Death, 29 days later in the Registrar's Office, to Hob's witness: Is he sane?

Johanna Constantine, drinking heavily from a large flask: unfortunately yes, by all legal definitions.

Death: fuck

Johanna: [passing the flask over] if your brother's even a tenth as intense as Hob, they'll be fine. Probably.

Death, brightening: Is Hob that bad?


Johanna: You know how sometimes you meet somebody and think "oof, they're a bit much, best give them a wide berth"?


Death: yeah.

Johanna: Hob's like a camouflaged hole in the ground of muchness. Except he's done the hole up all nice and he knows that sometimes you just want to be left alone in the hole to sulk and rattle the spikes for a bit, and occasionally get a F&M hamper tossed in.

Death: [hmmmmmmm'ing approvingly]

Johanna, morose: the bastard.

In the background, Hob and Dream are pressing their foreheads together and basking in each other's presence)

#dreamling #the sandman #it's underappreciated how many red flags hob probably is buried under his amiable exterior #he looked at dream of the endless and went 'yeah' #not even as a 'i can make him better' #very much as a 'i can vibe with his current state and frankly even if he was worse i'd still be like that's my husband [shrug emoji]' #'what am i supposed to do? i knew who he was when i married him' #everybody around them: [extremely done with their shit] STOP ENABLING HIM #hob: he's my goth sweetheart #dream's entire family: he's ten sulking cats in eyeliner and a dramatic coat #hob: i know :D i love him! #johanna constantine is like 'hob's insane' #and everybody's going 'oh no don't be so mean he's just a little boring next to dream' #johanna: he saw dream being dream and went 'i need to stamp my name on him. how do i permanently tie us together' #johanna: he'd never safety pin a condom but i can just see the gears turning in hob's head about how to get to spend more time with dream #johanna: just radiating smug contentment over his insane wet cat #hob: i cannot wait to spend the next 60 years with that man #hob: and ideally die in our sleep together still holding hands #death and johanna: [staring at him over their fourth round of drinks] #dream: [heart of eyes and pink of cheeks] #dream: we should never not be holding hands #hob: okay but what if occasionally we stop holding hands just to then appreciate the feeling of starting to hold hands again #dream: [mulling] acceptable #death and johanna could probably start an entire benefriends or actual romantic relationship entirely based on judging dreamling

[ride-a-dromedary]

You ever just think about Halsin and Thaniel meeting for the first time and get all choked up because I do.

#BG3 Musing #Halsin #Halsin Posting #halsin's friendship with thaniel is not talked about enough i think we should talk about it more #i have thoughts regarding this - soft feelings mostly #but you also just know that their first meeting was probably INCREDIBLY unproductive and chaotic but in that childhood way #where you don't really question anything you just both happen to be in the same fabric store together and you ask the other kid to play #and suddenly you're best friends (but in this case they actually saw each other again many times afterwards) #'who are you?' 'a friend of this land' 'what is your name?' 'i have many names but you can call me thaniel' 'okay thaniel i'm tore' #'where did you come from?' #'i don't know' 'how did you get here?' 'i woke up here' 'oh...where is your mother?' 'i do not have one' #'you don't have one? that means you must get to eat whatever you want and go to the river all by yourself' #'the river is an extension of this place - i do not go there it flows through me' #'cool! do you have a bedtime?' 'i do not need to sleep' #'neither do i! well sorta - i'm learning how to trance better but i keep waking up because of the horrors' #*nods* 'they are plentiful' #"yeah...do you wanna play stick ball?' #listen if im not thinking about halsin and thaniel i'm dead ok

[lucienne-thee-librarian]

Just to minimize my chances of being genuinely misunderstood OR deliberately misinterpreted, and crucified for something I don't think, How Dare You Say We Piss on the Poor website etc...I'm gonna say this right up top. I absolutely understand why people don't like Thessaly as a character, if anyone does completely unironically stan her as some kind of feminist hero who Did Nothing Wrong uwu, I personally see it as a bit of a red flag. I don't like terfs real or fictional. In a vacuum, I could even completely sympathize and agree with the people who want her cut.

HOWEVER.

It's really something to me to see people clamoring for her to be cut, because she carries and expressed an ugly indefensible prejudice (transphobia) in words towards (1) person. Meanwhile Hob fucking Gadling enacted one of the most violent forms of antiblack racism I can even think of against thousands no, millions of people, the ripple effects of which still affect billions more today. Just a little light idk, profiting off the fucking slave trade and had to be told by someone else that it was bad...and he's a fan favorite.

People are saying Thessally being Dream's love interest reflects badly on him or is somehow endorsement by the narrative (?!?!?!?!?!? Didn't she (SPOILER ALERT AS IF IT MATTERS BY NOW) help participate in his extended assisted suicide? She's not painted as a great person to me just another character what are y'all SMOKING whatever fine. It's fine this is fine.) But shipping Dream with Mr. Former Slaver is not only not verboten or frowned on widely in the fandom but its THEE most popular pairing by far. So...why the difference?

Like where are the same fans who are saying Thessaly shouldn't just be more clearly shown to be wrong, she shouldn't even be in the show at all when it comes to Hobert's crimes??? Yes, transphobia is indefensible. Isn't racism?

And I hear the cries of "it's fiction!!!" Already rallying (if anyone who needs to hear this even sees it lol) to which I say:

HORSESHIT. I KNOW you don't, deep down, really agree because if you did, why get upset about Thessaly being included??? Why does what she said to one person matter if it's Just Fiction You Guyze. Fictional characters are allowed to do bad things and fiction isn't reality sweaty....except when you only apply that standard to fictional racists you like and simp for, but fictional transphobes you don't are SO HARMFUL they shouldn't even be portrayed in fiction.

Like. Give me a big fat BREAK. This looks like bullshit, no? I'm sorry, but I'd love for someone to try and give any other explanation besides one personally offended you or hit home for you, and the other doesn't.

And if that bothers you or you feel like it says something negative about you...idk what you want me to say??? You can't control how other people perceive you and that's how people outside this majority-of-the-fandom bubble see it. You don't need to respond, I just wish and genuinely hope this gives you a moment to think about why fans who ARE bothered by both (and not just paying lip service to being bothered by the one but railing against the other) are so frustrated with people saying everyone is welcome but in practice only bending over backwards for the comfort and emotions of themselves, and people they can easily relate to.

You don't have to like Thessaly (I don't. I find her an interesting antagonist, I don't stan her. And frankly that's not the point of her character) but you'll pardon me for feeling more than a bit cynical and side eying people's motivations for what seems a...pretty obvious double standard, on what fictional crimes related to real world issues matter to y'all, and which clearly don't. Either actually bring the same energy to the table for fictional people who committed atrocities, even if against a group you're not part of and thus don't feel the need to empathize with, or just carry on, but accept that you don't have the SLIGHTEST room to talk about cutting characters who do immoral things. And you also need to accept that you look like a hypocrite when you do.

#thessaly #wanda the sandman #hob gadling #I could've cried sexism!!! Problematic Male vs Female Characters except 1) I don't actually think that's the main reason *here* #2) there are WAY better examples of that particular double standard in this fandom #also i can admit when I'm a bit of a hypocrite or was. #i used to dip my toes into the dreamling stuff too early on #but idk. It just got too sour seeing ppl whitewash (lol I know I'm a comedian) #what he did over and over. And I genuinely had started to wonder #if the show hadn't included that particular crime and I'd just imagined it from the comics because #my memory is shit sometimes and I guess I was naive. I *wanted* to believe someone would talk aboutit #if it had made it in. but ultimately i went back and checked and no #and seeing how the whole fandom behaving affected my non-white mutuals some of whom... #like these are my friends man or ppl I just respect and I can't just. Ignore their feelings and their pov #and act like they werent making points or it doesn't matter #like it's all just fun and games for everyone on the same terms. And seeing how easy it was #for everyone to ignore was so unsettling. I couldn't keep pretending it was just fiction and didn't affect anyone real #Call me a bully a t3rf apologist (fuck you and for the record. no) #a puritan or a Fancop (actually stop comparing #people disagreeing with you online to what cops do. For fucks sake you just make it look like nothing is really real to you outside fandom) #whatever man. Whatever helps you sleep. I'm just gonna block you #if you're clearly sticking your fingers in your ears. engaging with you is a waste of time and energy then #Hell I have sympathy for anyone who doesn't like thessaly #especially trans fans. Especially rn. But lbr that sympathy for a lot of the white trans/queer fans only goes one way!!! #never gets extended to anyone else's issues. Like THATSthe issue. And it's shitty! #(sorry this post is not about me in the confessional lol that's why I put this at the bottom #I just had feelings to get out and yes its my blog but i didn't want to clog the airways)

[moonchild-in-blue]

Australian Rituals / Teeth of God Tour Bingo

Alroighte gwois, let's hear your predictions for the upcoming rituals. I *might* make another bingo (like on Wembley) - even if I don't, let's get them all in one place cus I think it's funny.

If you have something specifically for the Teeth of God Tour (because they are headliners and can do Cooler™ Fancier™ stuff) do specify. Same for strictly Australian Rituals. Some stuff may happen earlier (like when they debuted TMBTE and the new Espera masks), others may only happen on the Tour, so let's just put them all here and see what happens 😗✌️

Please reblog/put on the replies your predictions!! Whether serious or silly, please share!

Mine are:

One of the Vessels (Vessel or ivy OR Espera!!!!) singing onstage with Oli

Kangaroo/koala headbands / Aussie Explorer hat

EUCLID (more for Teeth of God but wouldn't be surprised if earlier)

The Apparition (PLEASE)

The Summoning pushups will return

Older song throwback (please please Sugar or Jaws. TNDNBTG for ToG)

Outfit change for the Vessels (only cus i think Australia is quite hot now innit? poor iv will MELT in that jacket)

NEW VESSEL JEWELLERY

This one I'm not super confident/keen on BUT new Vessel mask with Antlers (more likely on ToG but who knows)

#I AM SO EXCITED FOR THE RITUALS AAAAAAA IT'S RIDICULOUS #i kinda hate that because of timezones they will be playing during the day (for me) rather than later at night but!! #it means we can at least gather round in the evening and react together #cus lord knows how many full nights of sleep i sacrificed during the US rituals #actually yeah now that i think about it it *IS* better this way #ignore my earlier tag then i am thinking out loud #i need at least one picture of the crew with koalas. Just one #i know the girlies are there already so i'm assuming they are ALL there #(one of the Esperas posted on her stories. calm down guys i am not doxing anyone) #do you think they are doing fun Aussie stuff 🥺 trying vegemite and milo and petting koalas and fighting roos 🥺🥺 #wait but Adam is not there yet. maybe her photo is from last year. or maybe they're all arriving at different times idk #i just hope they are not stressing too much and are having fun and healthy 👍 #i will get SO emotional hearing Vessel fully recovered on stage again 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 #ANYWAYS I RAMBLED TOO MUCH OMG SORREH #if you reached this have a little snack for your troubles 🤲 🍊🧃🍬 #sleep token #sleep token teeth of god tour

[fictionadventurer]

The worst part about reading in a genre where you have low expectations (in this case, Christian historical fiction) is that when a book impresses you, you have no idea if it's actually good or if you're just overly impressed because it was a fraction of a degree better than the usual garbage.

#basically lately anytime i read a christian fiction book that isn't romance-based i find myself surprised by the quality #i do think that some christian publishers are getting better #and trying to tell stories that dig deeper into real faith and messy issues #instead of making only vapid squeaky clean prayer-filled tropefests #but i'm not sure *how much* better #because anything above the low bar feels like great literature #the most recent is 'in a far-off land' by stephanie landsem #and let me tell you setting the prodigal son in 1930s hollywood is a genius concept #i have some issues with the history and the mystery #but the characters! #it has been a long time since i cried this hard over a book #several chapters of solid waterworks #(and i also have the issue of figuring out if it's actually that moving or if i'm just hormonal/sleep-deprived) #i keep thinking about this book but also i worry about recommending because what if it's actually terrible by normal book standards? #(also the author DOES NOT understand the seal of confession and i was SHOCKED to find that she's actually catholic) #but also looking at the reviews makes it clear that if most of christian fiction is vapid garbage it's these reviewers' fault #here you have something that's digging into sin and darkness and justice and mercy and these people are just #'how can it call itself christian fiction if it only mentions god at the end?' #are we reading the same book this WHOLE THING is about god! and humanity and our fallen nature and how this breaks relationships! #your pearl-clutching anytime someone tries to get even a tiny bit realistic is destroying this genre #i'm gonna run out of tags so i'll stop now

[icewindandboringhorror]

Some (late) holiday photos of the boye~!

#cats #holiday #OUGHH....... barely could even get these edited and posted... my mysterious sickness flare up has been sooo bad the past few #days.. I didn't even go to the usual obligatory family christmas I was supposed to attend (!!! health issue/medical mention in tags below) #My stomach issues basically put me in a constant state of uncontrollable shivering/body shaking + nausea + sometimes rapid heart #rate. and when it happens at night that makes it like.. nearly impossible to sleep when you're violently shaking + you can feel your heart #so strong + you keep having to run to the bathroom every 5 minute to cough and gag #and throw up and so on and so forth. etc. So I went like 40 hours without any sleep almost for christmas eve and all of christmas day #last night I finally got maybe 2 hours of sleep in between the nausea and shaking and stuff. and then today I was able to get a few #hours of sleep in the afternoon. Today I tried taking an anxiety mediciation a doctor gave me in case it was anxiety related (it's apparent #ly used to relax people and works in the moment. rather than like Anxiety Mediciation that you have to take for weeks to see any effect #because I think this isn't actually acting on your brain chemistry it's judt like..a mild sedative or something.) but all that did was make #me dizzy and sweaty lol. I;m glad I slept a little but I'm just still frustrated that I don't feel normal. I started having these #'episodes' (with the stomach issues + shaking + heartrate + nausea etc.) like at the end of october. And usually it will happen for like a #few hours at a time. or i'll lose sleep one day and then be fine the next. but this has been like nearly 3 days of feeling weird. so is #getting kind of annoying... It's funny too because I was so so productive like.. literally the few days before. I was feeling much better #and I was working on my game and blah blah. But then.. random issue flare up out of nowhere of course.. yaayy.... happy holidays to meee lo #I did at least see two random ducks outside of my window in the yard area for christmas. and havent seen them since. So it's like.. hrmm.. #pacing around my room nauseous and shakings and etc. but at least... hello.. two little ducks placed there just for me :3c #Now I get anxiety every night which I'm sure doesn't help/could exacerbate whatever underlying genuinely physical issues exist. But after #like 2 nights of 'I spend the night sleepless and incredibly uncomfortable just sitting in the dark sick' then bedtime is like.. dread... #I even was trying slapping myself in the face in desperation to see if somehow that could shock my body out of whatever the hell it was #doing lol.. up at 3am holding ice cubes in my hand and hitting myself in the head and crying from exhaustion and thowing up.. literally #ridiculous cartoon character feeling... AAANYWAY!!! At least I have baby boy pictures. and I have lots of doctors appointments so hopefully #whatever the issue is can be sorted out at some point. I don't know much about ibs but hopefully maybe something like that that I could pos #ibly take medication for and not something more seirous or anything. Maybe there's a food I'm secretly intolerant to or whatever. #And I did at least post a sims holday video actually timed for the holidays so that's something. I havent been productive really latrely #though obviously.. I can't even play games or small tasks when in that state since I'm just SO physically uncomfortable. Nausea and heart #stuff are THE hardest physical sensations to ignore.. BUT yeah... hoping I shall sleep at all tonight. hopeing to get like 3 productive #things done.. at some point... at least SOMETHING... lol..... *** *** ***

[necessarymeanstoanend]

do you know what a knave is?; an unprincipled man, rogue.

nigel’s

white void of doom and sketch

details

#aaaand here’s alex #why the FUCK is eddie so hard to draw?!?! #you guys are just going to have to excuse the fact that it really doesn’t look much like him #this turned out a little bit better than i expected but it did indeed take three different references to get the desired result #4 hours and 23 minutes #somebody get these hoes better haircuts #the original plan was to have him looking upwards more dramatically but we’re gonna start small when it comes to alex #this is only like my third time drawing eddie ​but now i want to draw alex again and the voices won’t let me sleep #this one looks very odd. there’s a ​couple of obvious things i can see now that i would change if i could do this over again but eh. #i’ll worry about that later #ANIMAL SYMBOLISM #i used the same skeleton design for the background with this one as well #like minds #murderous intent #like minds 2006 #alex forbes #art #fanart #drawing #digital art #alex forbes fanart #artist of tumblr #eddie redmayne #like minds fanart #i think now it’s time for me to draw them together but what should they be doing??

[scorpiusmalfoylovesoscarwilde]

headcanon that scorpius was a sick child and was in and out of hospital constantly, perhaps related to astoria's blood curse but not directly. his immune system isnt very strong, and everytime he gets sick they're terrified that it's the blood curse but also whatever else it could be, because it's always so sudden and so intense and they call healers over to the house who recommend this delirious feverish 4 year old is hospitalised immediately, and you'd think it'd get easier to some extent because they'd be used to it, but everytime they feel like this is it, this is the time he'll walk in to the hospital and not walk out again

#this headcanon has no purpose im just thinking of scorpius in bed like a sickly victorian child with scarlet fever or something #asking if he'll make it to sunrise lmfao #so then he hates hospitals with a passion #my friend from school was in them constantly he was even a make a wish kid and he can not fucking stand the places so #headcanon scorpius becomes a healer anyway lmao #im sick and this is how im coping by putting baby scorp in hospital lmfao #it just made draco that little bit more protective #lucius made an insensitive comment about it once and draco was ready to throw hands #this headcanon doesnt really go anywhere ive just decided scorpius was a sick child #he has sick child energy lmfao #he still knows some of his doctors/healers because he was there so frequently #just imaging lil scorp in a hospital bed and draco and astoria are sleeping in the room on like uncomfortable chairs and the fever finally #breaks and hes like uh daddy im hungry and its like 4am but draco couldnt care less cause scorp hasnt been able to eat anything for days #let alone ask for food directly and baby scorp is wondering why his parents are acting so damn weird just cause he asked for some toast #but once hes grown up whenever he gets sick its on such a lower level than what it used to be when he was a kid because his immune system #got better that he struggles to gauge when other people would usually stop trying to do daily activities and albus has to start wrestling #scorpius back to bed instead of going to class cause scorpius really youre practically dying and hes like pfff you wanna see dying? use tha #timeturner one more time and go back to see me at literally any point between 2 and 10 i am FINE #(he absolutely was not fine) #scorpius malfoy #albus potter #draco malfoy #hpcc #scorbus #this is so many tags im so sorry

[puppyeared]

ive made myself more wet and pathetic

#new icon because im SUFFERING. im in HELL #its so bad. i had to sign out of discord so now im both lonely and stressed #because i KNOW im still gonna get dstracted. i just did making this URGH #how good are brains at working around things. i once set a 7AM alarm on my phone with snooze cause i was so sure my brain would #be too lazy and keep snoozing instead of actually turning it off. but nay it either kept sleeping through the alarms and snoozing #or actually managed to turn off the alarm half awake that i barely remembered it and then waking up late #i actually have a track record of climbing out of bed and turning my alarm off without remembering. which is impressive bc i have a loftbed #the other thing is setting fake deadlines so make myself panic into doing things ahead of time. but unfortunately that doesnt work either #because if theres one thing my brain will put all its energy into remembering its self assurance. meaning i WILL be able to remember #the real deadline even if i try to trick myself. cant ask someone to give me a fake deadline either #the only things keeping me going rn is that i have deadlines due at least 1 day between each other and excitement being able to talk with #crow after break. but you can see how well thats going <- ignores long term rewards in favor of short term pleasure #BTW CROW IF YOURE READING THIS IM SO SORRY TURNING OFF MY DISCORD WITH BARELY ANY EXPLANATION #im a huge fucking dumbass and i had barely enough impulse control not to block everyone in my dms because i realized that would send a real #really bad msg. youre not distracting me im distracting myself and i promise youre not annoying me i just really like talking to you and #thats why im just barely stopping myself from signing in. I WANT TO TALK TO U LOTS BUT AT THE SAME TIME IM KICKING MYSELF FOR DOING IT #you can be a little mad at me btw cause i definitely could have done that better but i was all over the place abt how to do it without #making u think im ignoring you. IF THAT MAKES SENSE. SORRY #yapping #doodles #puppysona #edit but last week i tried to schedule and give myself work periods and break periods using my class schedule #and reminders on my phone to tell me when to start and stop. can you guess what happened

[deoidesign]

.

#ok finally making a post about meds #I've not ever tried taking medication before. I was sorta raised with that classic 'dont rely on meds you have to learn to manage without' #I mean I was also raised with the idea that therapy is stupid unless you have 'real' trauma. and also like idk. #can't stay home from school unless your temp is over 100 or you're throwing up. etc. very suck it up mindset #so I was just really nervous to start. also of course worried about losing myself or whatever I know that's a silly fear but #it's also a common fear for a reason!!! anyways #so I finally was like 'I need to do something' when I realized I was so anxious I couldnt even get myself to go outside alone #like I just don't want to do ANYTHING alone to a detrimental effect. and it was butting into my ability to do my work... #for various reasons. but then ALSO adhd has been a constant issue with my work as well! #it is SO hard to write and draw on a weekly pace like I am without being able to focus #my whole life I've had these terrible nightmares constantly and I've always woken up constantly in the night #sleep has always been terrible so I've always dreaded going to bed.. ESPECIALLy because it didnt even make me less tired #it was more something that I just did because I had to. #but going to bed was always terrible. there have been times I was too scared to go to sleep for weeks on end... #I've been mitigating this for years of course. and recently I've been taking melatonin which has been helping too. #but I've also always struggled to get up. because I've always been EXTREMELY exhausted #but also anxious of what the day might bring... idk. #anyways it has all hit a point that I was like okay. I am doing as many coping mechanisms as I can. the psych said they were good too #but... it just has never been enough. it's never been enough to make me not tired it's never been enough to make me not scared #so I finally talked to the doc about it. and she was like youve def got smth wrong basically. which yah I know.. but yknow #anyways so I started taking wellbutrin. and I am so frustrated now. because it's WORKING #that constant looming sense of dread is gone. I'm excited to get up. I'm excited to go to bed BECAUSE I'm excited to get up #I feel like for years I've been holding on to the idea that I have to get up because I have to put something good out into the world #and I've been clinging to knowing that if nothing else. I am able to help other people feel better. #but now for the first time in my life I'm like. free of it. I didnt even know it was possible... and I'm so sad how much I've lost out on #and so frustrated how my whole life I've been told to put up with it and push through it. and treated like a failure for it being too much. #and just. It has only been 2 weeks. but the lack of anxiety is SO noticeable I'm so... #I'll never miss it. the adhd is still pretty present but like whatever. I can manage that better. #and I'm just crying because of all this combined. #I just. I hope I get to finally be the best I can be now. for myself but also for you guys!

[iknowwhereyousleepatnight]

hey guys just doodling the guy again (i am booed offstage)

#death note #l lawliet #bright colors #eyestrain #my art #yeah it’s him again #went to actually draw something but like #eh #might as well draw this guy #i’m projecting my tiredness onto him but is it really projection if he’s also tired? i don’t think so #i would pay cash money to pass out for the next 24 hours dm me and i’ll give you my location and u can bonk me on the head w a bat #genuinely think the lack of sleep has been aggravating a lot of my issues i’ve been weirdly flipping between like #paranoia and weirdly happy and irrational anger and just deeply numb #which actually now that i think about it is exactly what happens every time i don’t sleep enough for long enough #methinks i should sleep more snork mimimi it makes my brain work better #god i want to sleep so bad rn #but i have to do laundry and make 2 pies for other people to consume tomorrow #i plan on decorating the crusts w dicks or smth bc i hate the people it’s going to and they are very conservative religious sorta vibes #but some people there would get a kick out of it (the good ones) #u know i was wondering if i really complain about being tired enough for those anons about sleep and y’know what #i really do #and i will forever #if i’m tired u will know of it and thats because it’s always #maybe i should try that caffeine shit people rave about (<- has not drank energy drinks or sodas or coffees since i was like. 14) #actually i think my heart would give out idk what’s with it but it gets silly sometimes so i don’t think it would like caffeine #or maybe idc who knows #the best solution imo is passing out forever and ever and waking up and hopefully being refreshed or smth