#and I'm not here for insulting others who might be projecting onto characters they like

[arahabakis-vessel]

thinks about how we see Dazai hit the required criteria for ASPD across all the BSD media... but also how so many people blow entirely past the actual evidence and go !!! SOCIOPATH!!! MANIPULATIVE PSYCHOPATH!!!! Not seeing the "he was clearly traumatized in a way that severely affected him to the point it entirely dictates how he interacts with the world now" part of it.

#☆twisted sorrow☆ #dazai osamu #bungo stray dogs #bsd #dazai bsd #controversial opinion but a lot of the 'autistic' traits people see in him are actually aspd traits #especially because we see that dazai is incredibly socially aware but that he *intentionally* does not participate in- #-prosocial behavior unless it benefits him or his plans #rather than a genuine deficit in social skills/interactions/communication #however headcanons are *head*canons for a reason #and I'm not here for insulting others who might be projecting onto characters they like

[plsdonttakemyname]

— — — — — — — — —

Characters; Nikolai Gogol

Genre; angst, hurt/comfort, scenario

Warnings; reader has family and friends problems, mental breakdowns, Bad writing. So please don't read it if you're uncomfortable with these. This might not make sense since this is my second time writing an angst , hurt comf and scenarios but I hope you enjoy it <3..

— — — — — — — — —

Knocking at the door of Nikolai's office with a tired look on your face as you walked in. You were greeted by Nikolai, your beloved boyfriend.

"Oh, hello dove. I was expecting to see you there. Would you mind to share a conversation?"

"I just wanna cry." Nikolai's eyes widened abit before speaking again. "Cry away Dove.. It's okay. Let go of your tears and let me hold you close. You know how much I care for you. I'll never leave you alone again." He said and kissed your forehead " Now come here, sit on my lap. I want to kiss you right now" he said with a smile on his face. "I love you so much Kolya, it's just things are getting more and more harder for me y'know.." You were really tired after studying for hours straight without any rest at all. "I know, baby. But don't worry. Everything will be alright. Just stay strong for me alright ?. We have each other, we can make it through anything together.I promise everything will work out just fine". He said as he holds your hand gently "I just I feel like I'm always not good enough, my friends and family doesn't even understand that I'm trying my best to make them happy.." you said as tears started to build up in your eyes.

"I'm trying my best Kolya. I really am. but none of them believed me. I got called a whore, spoiled and ungrateful. I don't know what to do anymore. I just feel like I wanna cry my heart out." You choked out a sob as soon as you finished the sentence "Oh, Dove... That sounds horrible. What happened?.. Tell me everything, please. Don't keep any secrets from me. I'm here for you. Always. And if anyone tries to hurt you or insult you, they won't get away with it. Not ever. Okay? Do you trust me Love?" He says as worries started to build up in his eyes and pulled you into a hug "yes I do trust you.. I'm studying really hard for college. my parents always told me to get off my phone and yelled at me when I'm clearly texting my project teacher about my work.This morning I got into an argument with my parents. They just slapped me because I talked back and I was trying to defend myself." You started crying while Nikolai is hugging you tightly on his lap.

"Oh Dear... You poor thing..That must've been awful. I wish I could protect you from these people who would do such terrible things to you. My love, you deserve better than this. If only..." He looks at the floor with sadness in his eyes "...if only I had done something sooner.." "All of my friends are just using me and talking behind my back I really don't know what to do anymore Kolya.I really don't. It just hurts." Your voice started to crack "I'm sorry Dove.. I should've known better than to think that those thing were worth trusting. They're nothing but troublemakers. They'd use you until you broke down completely. Then they'd laugh at you when you cried. They're disgusting creatures." He said while rubbing circles behind your back trying to calm you down "I wanna cry my feelings out but I'm really scared.." He hugged you tightly "It's okay, my love. Let it all out. Cry as loud as you need to. I'll hold onto you forever. No one else matters but us. Only us." He strokes your hair and gently tucking your hair behind your ear that was covering your face as he continued.

"You're safe with me.Never forget that. M'kay?" Your nodded and your sob slowly turning into small sniffles "Kolya?" You said his name after calming down abit. "Yes? What is it, my love?" He smiled warmly at you "Is there anything else bothering you besides your bullies,being treated badly by others or feeling worthless?" He takes his hands in yours and looks into your eyes lovingly "Tell me everything Dove."

"Am I annoying to you?.." You asked him as he laughs softly "Of course not, my love. Why would you ask such an absurd question? Of course not. You are absolutely adorable. The most beautiful person I have ever met. There isn't another person alive who compares to you. In fact, no other person even comes close besides you , Dos-kun and Sigma. You smiled at his response "I'm sorry for breaking down like this when you're busy... I just can't do this anymore I've been too stressed out lately." He kissed your forehead gently "Don't be sorry, my love. Just remember how much happier we are together. Remember how happy we make each other. And never doubt yourself again. You are perfect." He says and holds you close against him "I promise you will find someone special soon enough." "But...You're special to me and I love you Kolya." You whispered In his ears with a smile on your face now as he blushed at your words "I love you too my Dove. Now come here and give me a hug. Hugging helps calm you down after stressful situations. It makes you feel loved and protected too.. So... He said as he pulls you closer to him "C'mere! Give me a big hug I've missed you so much my love "

— — — — — — — — —

A/n; Hii ! I hope you like this fic :) I'm so sorry if anyone is going through this too. I hope you're all doing okay now <33 Make sure to stay Hydrated and Eat in time, Just a reminder you're all perfect no matter who you are, You're all good enough. Some words can be extremely hurtful sometimes but it's the best to try and ignore them :D I'm always open to talk about it if you're going through a rough time/day :) I love you all mwah <3

— — — — — — — — —

#bsd comfort #bungou stray dogs imagines #bsd fluff #bsd fluffs #nikolai x reader fluff #nikolai gogol #nikolai gogol x reader #bsd nikolai gogol #nikolai fluff #bsd imagines #bsd x reader fluff #bsd x reader #bsd #Stay safe everyone i love you all <3

[ernmark]

Didja miss me? I got caught up on the Juno Steel episodes a few weeks ago (still working on Second Citadel, more on that later), and now that I’m vaguely getting my life back on track, I’m sticking my toe back in this fandom, just in time for the beginning of the final season! 

So here we go:

Juno Steel and the Vanishing Act (Pt 1) Reaction

First off, it’s so nice to see Cas Kanagawa again. She sounds so much calmer, so much steadier. Which makes sense, given that the last time we saw her she had just accidentally killed her father and had spent years under the thumb of a hyper-controlling stepmother, and she’s finally free. 

So this exchange here is really striking:

JUNO: I'm glad you get to do what you always wanted, Cass. Honestly.

CASS: You... what?

JUNO: I said I'm glad. That's weird, now

CASS: No, I mean... no sarcasm? No bad jokes? No insults?

JUNO: Reading's not all I learned how to do over the past few years.

CASS: Yeah. Yeah, I think I can tell. Okay, I'll admit it. I do owe you. I don't have any money to give you, but I think I can help you out. (Vanishing Act)

It’s two ladies who have survived some real hard shit, who used to bring out a lot of the worst in each other, after they’ve gotten help, escaped from a toxic situation, and taken charge of their lives. Holy shit, that feels nice.

That said, I kinda want her to keep a bit role here. When the plot focuses on a character, it’s usually not because good things are coming to them, so I’m just fine keeping her in the director’s chair of her documentary series.

But that brings us to the actual mystery. 

We’ve got Carrie Gold (As in Kerry Gold, the canned tomato brand… cuz you throw tomatoes at a bad actor, get it?), the really terrible actress who bought her way onto a show, and owner of the Prismacrystal Chimes, who’s about to humiliate herself at her big debut. 

“Taking out my Chimes would be sabotage! And if my acting career doesn't take off after, why... ehm. Never mind.”

It may be that she’s actually out of money, and she was hoping for a glamorous career as an actor might save her from it. Notably, there’s no mention of her donating actual cash, just the Chimes. And the Chimes are an heirloom, so they may be the last thing of value she’s got, and this kind of publicity would be a good boost in its value– and having it ‘stolen’ would be a great way for them to disappear out of her possession without her losing face. Possibly the pawn ticket is hers, and she’s been selling off her other valuables?

(The Chimes, by the way– the scene where they were brought out, with the music and Juno’s narration and all? That was gorgeous. And I’ll talk more about the lighting part elsewhere.)

We’ve got Warner Jayne (my mind kept going back to German film director Werner Herzog? Or Warner Bros.?), the producer who’s bankrolling the show, arranged for Carrie’s involvement, procured the Chimes and the sound/lighting design, and notably doesn’t think the show can stand on its own without a lot of glitz and glamor.

“God, this show needs it. It's unwatchable, I...Oh. Don't tell Billie I said any of that.”

We’ve got Billie Dalton (as in the Dalton Gang?), the director whose grand project is about to be butchered onstage by Carrie’s acting, but maybe rescued by the special effects, but generally resents the interference. She’s the only one with the key to the Chimes’ lock, and the only person aside from Carrie who actually handles it. She’d have the opportunity to walk off with it while everybody’s eyes are on the stage. 

“Having those Chimes stolen in front of everyone, having Carrie Gold scupper the show... It would all almost be worth it for Warner Jayne to get what he deserves.”

We’ve got Clotilda Fairborough, actual actor whose big break is about to be shattered by her incompetent costar. 

“I'm going to drag this show kicking and screaming into something like artistic credibility, and you owe me for that, so act like it... or you'll see what happens when I'm not feeling so cooperative.”

These three have, in my opinion, the same motive: they’ve got a lot riding on a play that’s about to be ruined, which he didn’t believe in in the first place. Warner has a lot of money invested in this. Billie and Clotilda have their reputation on the line, and they might not get another chance. So it behooves all of them to get everybody’s eyes on Lono on their show, but not actually be paying too close attention to the play itself– so putting a priceless work of art on stage and then declaring it’s gonna be stolen at a very specific time during opening night? That’s perfect publicity.

USAmericans might be familiar with a grim joke: “Apart from that, Mrs. Lincoln, how was the play?” Alternatively, nobody thinks too hard about what was going on in Don Juan Triumphant right before the Phantom of the Opera dropped a chandelier on the audience. Any shortfalls in the play itself will be barely a footnote, but everybody will be talking about the event.

So everybody’s got a motive to throw a wench (hee hee) into the works, but the presence of the pawn shop ticket at the end has me putting my money on Carrie.

(There’s the obvious option, of course, that Nureyev is actually on the crew as a stage hand and he’s just being overlooked because nobody ever notices techies, but if that was the case, I feel like the stage crew would have been at least mentioned before now. A passing line, or something, but we’ve got nothing. )

(Also the transcripts on the official website are an actual godsend)

#the penumbra podcast #penumbra meta

[soleminisanction]

I don't have much experience with comics, but one thing that keeps popping up in fic and shocking me is how MEAN people write Stephanie. In a way where it's like they almost don't realize she's being mean, if that makes sense? For example I was reading this fic where Tim and Steph were having this emotional reunion after he thought she was dead, and she called him "boy blunder." And continued to call him that throughout the fic. Am I crazy or is that an awful thing to call someone? I guess they were going for an inside joke, but to me it just seems so cruel, like every time she talks to Tim she's implying he's made a mistake. Of all the plays on "boy wonder" I've seen, that sounds the meanest. Is this something she calls him when they're together in the comics, do you know?

Oh she's absolutely called him Boy Blunder in the comics, along with things like Boy Wonderbread and Boy Virgin once when she was poking fun at him freaking out over her pregnancy. It's true in fics and it's true in canon: a lot of what people try to pass off as Steph being "snarky" or "quirky" is just her being flat-out mean, but never getting called out on it.

It's everywhere. And you're right that people don't realize it -- in fandom or the comics. She turned up in Damian's Robin book recently for exactly one line of dialogue and that line was a judgemental insult -- "Your weird, gross pizza is over there, Damian." She only has a grand total of three lines in the action portion of "The Elephant in the Room" and two out of those are just her insulting Tim (while the third one might as well be "Ooooo, what does THIS button do?"). Hell. half of the so-called "jokes" in Batgirls are just Steph being a catty, judgemental brat while the narrator goes "lol isn't she funny?"

And it's not even a recent thing. I haven't been able to make a post about this because I'm on a freelancing deadline IRL but someday I'm going to go on a massive rant about Jordanna Spence, the poor civilian girl inserted into Steph's supporting cast as Batgirl whose only narrative purpose is to provide one of The Other Girls for Steph to insult and bully constantly for the crime of wearing pink and being in a sorority. (And sometimes she's accidentally racist about it, which is...""fun"")

Steph will spend storyarcs hanging out with like, Damian or Kara or Klarion, and they're all treated like these Big Meaningful Bonding Experiences, but all Steph does the entire time is insult them and make judgemental comments about everything they say or do. And yet every single one ends the story thinking she's the greatest person who ever lived and lining up to suck her dick with everyone else in the comic.

It's honestly messed up, but here's the thing: it's absolutely not a Steph-exclusive issue. You know who else I've heard these exact criticisms leveled at? Bella Swan. And Hermione Granger, to a lesser extent only because she's the author self-insert but not the point-of-view character. That's part of why She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named's adult novels are so much worse, because they are told from the PoV of the self-insert character and thus we're constantly barraged with her judgemental opinions about men, trans women, poor people, people with heavy accents, any woman who doesn't perform femininity to the author's exacting standards and, of course, fat people.

It's a symptom of the self-insert character, is I guess what I'm saying. Which of course means that it also gets applied to literally everyone else in the Batfamily on occasion too -- the boys and Bruce especially but also like, I'm sorry, I don't think Cass suddenly learning to curse and be casually mean is funny, I think it's a sign of lazy writing.

The difference being of course that the guys get written by a lot of different people, many of whom are interested in them as characters instead of just as vehicles to project themselves onto. Several others (especially in fandom) do just use them as vehicles (Damian hasn't been given to a good writer in over a decade and god knows Jason got more than his fair share of Very Special Boy treatment during the New 52), but it's not the only part in their canon.

Steph, though? Since the end of War Games forward, she's been nothing but a self-insert character designed for straight white women to project themselves onto. Which is sexist and sucks and obviously can't be called "the character's fault" or anything, but knowing all of that doesn't make her mean-spirited bullying any easier to put up with if you're not one of the people getting off on the power fantasy of being the bully.

#long post #stephanie brown critical #anti stephanie brown #dc comics asks #rambling #cursing #I get a little vulgar in there but tbh suck her dick is the best way I can describe the way most people treat steph brown #vent #this actually felt good thank you for giving me an outlet to just get this off my chest #I've been seeing a lot of her panels floating around Discord channels lately and it struck me hard how MEAN she is in all of them

[sharonisthebettercarter]

Castration and orchidectomy are not the same thing.

Castration is the removal of the testicles, while orchidectomy is the removal of only one testicle. Orchidectomy can be done for medical reasons and to treat certain conditions, but it is also a common procedure for transgender people who are transitioning to a male or male-presenting gender identity.

While both can lead to a reduction in the production of certain hormones, the overall effects and consequences are different depending on the specific procedure and the patient's individual medical needs and goals.

putting these in one again

Orchidectomy (from the Greek "orchi" meaning "testicle") is a surgical procedure in which one or both testicles are removed from a person's body. It's a form of castration, because it removes the production of testosterone from the body. This can lead to a decrease in libido, hair growth, and energy levels, as well as a change in voice and body shape due to the loss of estrogen and testosterone that would usually be produced by the testicles.

Orchidectomy can be done to treat certain medical conditions like uterine, ovarian, and other gynecological cancers as well as testicular cancer.

baby, all you told me in these two is that a square is not a rectangle it's a rhombus but also it is a form of rectangle and it's so unnecessary, i gotta tell ya. but it's a little bit funny to me too

this is all semantics, but from what i gather, orchiectomy is what they call the surgical procedure for bilateral castration today. it's just a slightly newer word for the same old process, granted with much better medical knowledge and safety than the 19th or 16th centuries, but i digress, lmao

emasculation actually has an archaic use that means to castrate as well! neuter is even older than all of them. sorry, lol, synonym nut because i write<3

... smuts... sometimes... ;)))))))))))))))))))))))))

ahem.

i am aware that there are medical advantages or reasonings to castration and that orchiectomy would be used for trans people as well, but i suppose this could be news for others?? and i'm always down for edumacation~<3 (same goes for mastectomies and hysterectomies too, ESPECIALLY for fibroids and endometriosis)

i still thinks it's a bit extreme of a jump for ryan (which has me wondering if you may be projecting some internalized feelings onto him as a character/want to see them represented which to a degree, i can get, go and be *you* if you are trans and don't let anyone tell you different), but don't think i missed all the hints

this tells me you want ryan to be trans i'm guessing? i think rep of a trans person/kid would be nice and plausible for the boys (especially with how witch hunty people are right now, fuck that), but i don't know if i want it to happen to ryan specifically when he like... he *already* has HOMELANDER to deal with and you wanna add to that???

listen... i just wanna see ryan be a little shit and use his powers. the actor who plays him is GREAT at being a creepy little fucker (prior experience in horror!) which i suppose could work with the trans aspect, but like... it would be a lot going on at once (there's a balance here that can be easily overloaded) and i'm not so sure you'd want a little transgirl minilander lasering the shit out of stuff??? (or maybe you do, LMAO!!)

but i also feel like if there were any indication he might be trans, he'd have already shown signs with becca raising him (she was 100% a supportive parent, she raised him gentle which homie insulted but i'm pretty sure she would have let ryan actually be a girl if he felt uncomfortable being a boy is what i'm getting at.)

OR~<3! and here's a kickin' twist... ryan has secretly been trans the whole time<3<3<3!!! (could you imagine, whole different set of problems with homelander finding out but he'd probably *actually* encourage it in this case *just* to hide it since he's already introduced ryan as his son to the public!)

i do think some good trans rep may be more likely for gen v and that it would be lovely to see<3

my thing is that i just want them to add big bobby~<3 (hughie's transwoman friend in the comics) cause she's over 6 foot and a total boss that flaunts her fabulously flamboyant fashion sense while just being all around awesome and huge and awesome and kind of an asshole but also awesome i love her... i also LOVE bobby as a girl's name like you have no idea... IT'S CUTE--.

but idk, it's whatever i guess, and remember that squares are the lovechild of the rhombus and rectangle~<3<3<3

and go write trans ryan fic if you want trans ryan, lol! you have all rights to do whatever the fuck you want in fanfic<3 ;)

**ALSO, i'm assuming the very last thing you mentioned pertains exclusively to intersexed people, satan that did not hit me the first time.

but generally if someone can have an orchiectomy, they don't have a uterus or ovaries (though yes, i am aware some often ignored humans do have both), i would have started by mentioning testicular/prostate/other y chromosome related cancers because generally speaking, someone who has testes does not see a gynecologist or is at risk for any of those cancers. (generally, again, intersex people and chromosomal disorders are a thing)

anywho~<3 ;))))

#lmao #learning #square #rhombus #rectangle #ryan butcher #transgender #trans representation #gen v #the boys #big bobby #rambling #semantics #synonyms #becca butcher #homelander #bad parenting #good parenting #from becca #homie's a different animal and i expect things that will entertain me more than they should

[fulltidalwavecomputer]

✨Oh who is she~?✨

Wild theory: this girl will appear in episode 11 because we never see her with the popular girls outside of the music video, implying she might've realised they were toxic and left which is similar to Jake and his current friend group. I hope we get her name...for now I want to call her Charlotte.

Also I do have a theory that Drew and Elliot are secretly friends or will become friends, here's some potential evidence:

In the music video, it honestly looks more like he's scolding Elliot. The other bullying victims are all on the ground whilst Elliot's just standing there. Also it might be nothing but Drew has a face shadow, the only other character in this segment of the song with a face shadow is Milly who is angry and hurt. I know other characters have face shadows later but they also have mouths and some devil horns so it could just be a style change.

I'm pretty sure the characters getting bullied cut off at the left hand side of the screenshots are the same as those boys with speaking lines at the beginning of the episode who are shown to be friends.

In Drew's character export he has bows on his socks. I'm pretty sure this is canon for numerous reasons, which must mean it's in character for him to wear them(with our current understanding of him it really isn't). Now, much like flowers, bows have a soft/feminine connotation. Perhaps he has a softer, more compassionate side which we haven't seen, allowing him to be friends with someone like Elliot?

Also he has rolled up sleeves in his redesign(and short sleeves in GL). It could just be to show off his watch but I noticed that Elliot has one of his sleeves rolled up as well, presumably for gardening. It wouldn't surprise me if it gets revealed that Drew has helped him with gardening stuff before.

Oh and lastly Rosy made a "Drelliot" edit on discord with them playing genshin impact together, which could've been completely non-canon but maybe it does foreshadow them having an at least somewhat positive relationship. Idk the context behind why she made it but eh. This is all just a theory.

Lastly, I have noticed that when Drew insults Hailey he never picks on her for her stage fright. He always vilifies her, calling her "uptight" or a "cow" which could honestly describe him sometimes lol. And Jake seemingly didn't know about her stage fright prior to getting told, which means Drew can't have told him. So would he really pick on Elliot when he's just some guy with seemingly no other friends? Maybe at first but I doubt he'd be able to justify it to himself for long. I have crafted so many theories about why drew picks on the club but as I think about it again the most likely answer is that he's insecure in some way(it could just be a red herring but he's been accused of it enough times) and that old friend of his found the club weird which sparked him to project onto them and bully them, but then he felt guilty after seeing Hailey freeze up on stage or smth idk. I could probably write an entire separate post about my predictions/headcanons for Drew and Zoey's backstories, if we even get them in ep 11 that is.

#the music freaks

[lady-harrowhark]

3 and 12 please!! <3

3. What were your top five books of the year?

OBVIOUSLY Nona is number one, I don't have to explain that one, but after that it gets tougher for me to pick/order them!

Not My Problem by Ciara Smyth might be my second place - I pitched it to my friend as "Gideon Nav and Paris Geller team up to run an Easy A-style favor economy at an Irish high school," which I feel like really nails the vibe.

I finally got around to reading Solitaire by Alice Oseman, and it about knocked the wind out of me with how similar Tori is to my high school/college self. Partly it's that it was written in 2012 by a fellow tumblrite, and that vibe is Very Correct, but also just the uhhhhh everything else about her :/ Which was a cool experience to read, but also a bit unnerving, and I definitely had to take a break in the middle of it to head off a Spiral.

I also really liked Mindy McGinnis's The Initial Insult/The Last Laugh duology (which I'm counting as one spot on the list lol) - as with all her books, they're bizarre but I always have fun with her books even if they don't end up being a favorite. These two shake up the collected works of Edgar Allan Poe in a Pringles can and then ask "What if the real horror was being a teen girl living under capitalism all along?"

And then maybe My Eyes Are Up Here by Laura Zimmerman. It's for sure not the most groundbreaking book I've ever read, but it was fun and sweet and a quick read - just the kind of "brain candy" I needed. Me? Projecting? Onto the main character that's a Midwestern honor student who's insecure about her huge boobs and only wears oversized sweatshirts and is navigating the dynamics of team sports and her first blossoming friendship/maybe-something-different-than-friendship with a boy during her sophomore year of high school? I don't know why you'd think that.

12. Any books that disappointed you?

I already answered this but I love complaining so we're going for round two with A Lesson in Vengeance by Victoria Lee, which was disappointing because I really, really liked it and then I can't pinpoint why but the ending just didn't satisfy me and I'm so sad about it! It was fun and atmospheric and one of the characters kind of reminded me of a warped AU Harrow and I just don't feel like the ended hit as hard as it should have or something? I read it while I was staying with my friends for fall break and apparently I started making a face as I was reading the last few pages; when I finished it and looked up, my friend was on the other end of the couch smothering her laughter at my expression lol.

From this ask meme

#thank youuuu :) #lantur #ask

[zaine-m]

July 15th - I always wait way too far into the day and end up posting these at like 12 am. I'll try working on it for the next episode. I'm pretty excited to start the seconds season, It means we're getting closer to the release of season 3.

Previous -- next

Season 2 Episode 1: "New Year's Eve" thoughts under cut:

Okay, big recap

I love how Caswen has seen each other shirtless

Right, the Yac thing with Nini, why did she get into that?

Jenn asks Carlos if Gina and the dancers are good then she answers

Are you Kourtney, or are you going to put Nini first again?

Okay, I was watching Zombies 3 earlier today and all the group dances looks so weird there but here they look so natural. I guess t's because here they're filming a music video, not hunting aliens

Ahh, Portwell's first couple moment!

Gina's dance moment ♥️

"We'll never break apart"... sure

Is it Gina or Nini who says "I'm gonna make my mark" I've seen lyric websites say it's Nini but in the video it's pretty clearly Gina

I found it kinda weird how they had Ricky hold the camera at the end when Nini's still supposed to be the main character. I guess it foreshadows Nini not being the man character anymore

Why does Carlos never invite people to his house

Ricky being so happy about getting back with Nini. Perhaps to an unhealthy extent

Nini, Ricky is trying to have a healthy relationship wit good communications and you're just hiding huge secrets

Why is Kourtney always the first to know when someone's coming or leaving

Expand your friend circle Kourtney

The way Gina quiets herself after she gets excited, who hurt you

Also her hair <3

Ashina holding each other really close (I like to jus ignore that Ashlyn has a boyfriend)

So the fire thing being revealed just didn't have any effect on the story, cool

Mike is just trying his best

Someone give Ricky a hug

Nini, tell him that you're leaving, stop procrastinating, i'll just hurt him more

The way that Nini is constantly compared to Ricky's mom is kinda Freudian

Nini, you've gotta fucking tell him, it's only gonna get worse from here

"You're my home" go to therapy

"The Ricky and Nini of North High" Why does she project onto the students so much

I love how at this point the viewers are just used to the teacher hanging out with a student outside of school

Okay, Miss Jenn was the lead in every play? This creates so many questions about her character. The whole "Bet on the underdog" thing made me think that she ever get the lead. But she was he girl who was always the lead??

Also Lacrosse players. Eww

You're high school exes, why is she being so bitter. Of course he would dump her when they went to different universities

Does miss Jenn really not know about that award? They act like it's pretty common knowledge

The way Ricky thinks his relationship with Nini is reliant on the musical. Someone get this boy some therapy

"I need to count on myself instead" The importance of this line!

I love how intense he's being with the dance. He's really giving his all

"Don't whatever me loverboy"

The way the writers wanted tension for the kiss but they already had them kiss once so they just gave that bullshit excuse

Did they just decide in this episode that Big Red's parent's have a pizza place

Not the throb 😭

Then they also decided that Carlos is rich. I feel like they should get better at planning ahead of time

The look they give Carlos when he says the "confident enough to dress comfortably" line

Everyone already knows the musical Carlos

"I'm Mexican and gay. This is my inside voice"

Kourtney directly tells Seb what the game is and he still gets it wrong

I think this might be the last time the waterpolo guys are mentioned

"That's actually really sweet" then they go back to insulting each other. The sibling vibes

Carlos is trying so hard to keep the secret

Ricky is so fucking excited about the musical. Why do they get him happy just to give him that much higher to fall from

I love how the drama department revolves around whatever quarter-life crisis she's having that week

EJ being way too confident about going to duke

"I lost track of the air quotes"

Wait, Seb is most thankful of his cows and not Carlos. He chose his cows over his boyfriend

The awkward silence

Kourtney immediately knowing who it is

"I'm Ashlyn. I like to know what's happening in my life"

Noo, EJ accidently making Big Red insecure about the perfume and getting in the way of Redlyn

"You know facial blindness. I have that but with emotion. I mean, I also have facial blindness" Autistic mood

"It's probably nothing" Talk about it Ricky

Ashina Singing!!!!

That screaming scrunched up face Ricky does when he sings, why does he do that? Is that just a thing the actor does?

Portwell having a moment in the midnight countdown

Miss Jenn cutting her hair after running into her ex is a mood

An american classic that's set in France lol

"The most important award in theater" that she didn't know about this morning

Miss Jenn, tone down your projection

Why is everyone assuming Nini will get the lead, like wtf why is she such a main character

Again Nini why did you announce that as publicly as possible at the worst time as possible

#hsmtmts #hsmtmts watch through #hsmtmts season 2

[ricksroaches]

Jungkook - Dysphoria ch. 1

pairing: Yoongi x Reader, OT7 x Reader (platonic)

summary: Jungkook, a burnt out gifted student, comes home from summer camp not ready to start his sophomore year of highschool, but his friends are there to help him feel better. Although not in the best of ways.

notes: This is a Euphoria-ish au but mostly it's just heavily inspired by the show (I use a few quotes), and each chapter is based on a character. There's a few parts where I cue a song title that's because I made a soundtrack to listen to while reading but I deleted it a while ago so :( if you feel like it listen to the ones I did write down. I'm apologizing now bc my writing can be a bit choppy/rushed its just cuz i have a more drabble-like style and don't know how to write between big scenes. THIS IS A DARK FIC. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. Hope you enjoy and sorry for this big ass paragraph.

word count: 3.9k

warnings: ass-load of angst, mental illness (depression, anxiety, bipolar, OCD, and probably more), drugs (all of them. just all of them), underage drinking, cursing, mentions of self-harm

Next chapter

[Slideshow - Labrinth]

When Jungkook was 5, he wanted to be an astronaut. He wanted to fly into the sky and zip around space exploring things never before seen. His little mind was so strong, wanting to learn anything and everything. When he first learned how to read, he would read every sign he passed in the car and play games with the letters he’d find. It wasn’t long before he was placed in advanced classes with kids he'd never seen before and for the first time in his academic career, he was challenged.

When Jungkook was 10, he wanted to be a doctor. He wanted to wear a white coat and glasses and race around a hospital busy saving lives everyday. He wanted people to look to him for advice and treat him with respect. He wanted to feel needed.

When Jungkook was 14, he wanted to be a paramedic. He didn’t think he’d be smart enough to become a doctor so an EMT would have to do. His classes had begun to pile up in work to the point where he didn’t have the time to think about anything but school. He ate, slept, and breathed homework, projects, and term papers.

When Jungkook was 16, all he wanted to do was graduate. He no longer had any desire to pursue his childhood dreams. When he was asked what he wanted to do when he was older, his mind was a void. He couldn’t see any future for himself past high school. He went day to day not bothering to care about what might happen the next day. He coasted through all of his classes and dropped out of the advanced programs that his parents put him in.

His potential was like a flame. It was small at first, but still had loads of potential, so more kindling was thrown on top. The flame received it well, quickly spreading over the new material. But they kept stacking kindling. Stacking and stacking and stacking putting more and more pressure until finally….the flame died. All because he liked to read.

[Forever - Labrinth]

The clouds inched across the sky and rows of crops and fencing whipped by the car window. A stark contrast between the two. Jungkook rested his head against the glass and watched as the car began to pass more and more houses. The familiar area told him he was almost home. He should’ve been glad, elated even. He would finally get to see his friends again, but after three weeks of summer school to catch up on the class he skipped last year he’d lost the ability to smile or show any form of positivity. To say he felt like a zombie would be an insulting understatement.

The car pulled into the ever so familiar driveway and the rest of his family piled out of the car. He didn’t move. He heaved a long, anguished sigh before snatching his duffel bag from the other seat and throwing open the door.

He was out the front door again before his mom could even ask him where he was going. Speeding his bike down the empty road that he’d ridden countless times before. He could make this route with his eyes closed. The house in question came into view and Jungkook pedaled harder to close the distance. He swung one leg to the opposite pedal and straddled it until he swerved to a stop in the driveway. The house was old, hadn’t been lived in for years, wasn’t on the market, yet wasn’t scheduled to be torn down. It was the perfect place for a group of teenagers to tear apart and put back together. Without knocking, he stepped inside and was hit with the welcoming scent of booze, pizza, and weed with notes of cigarettes and coffee. Music blasting from a distant room in the house led him to the living room where he counted one, two, three, four, five people sprawled about the room. Upon noticing him standing in the doorway, they jumped up and raced to pull him into the room.

“Kook! How you been man? How’d surviving summer school go?” Taehyung was Jungkook’s best friend and unsolicited wingman. He was always trying to set him up with girls so he could get his v card punched. Taehyung was ever the ladies man. Never had trouble finding a date or a hookup. No one could blame him though. If they had that flawless, arrogant face they’d use it too. Despite his fuckboy nature, he was the best friend Jungkook ever had. They’d gone to the same school since they were 7 and Taehyung’s untamable charisma sniffed out Jungkook’s shyness rather quickly. They were inseparable and the rest is history.

“Fine I guess.”

“Kookie, come sit down! I’ve been saving your spot on the couch for you!” Jimin pulled Jungkook to the left corner of the C shaped couch. Jimin was like Taehyung in the sense that he also had no issues with finding partners. He wasn’t near as promiscuous as Taehyung, but he made up for it with his bisexuality. He had an entire other gender to choose from. Jimin was probably the nicest of the group. He always gave the best hugs and was their personal therapist. His aura seemed to coax you into opening up to him even if you hadn’t originally planned on it. He had a way of saying all the right words to make you feel better, even if it was just for a moment. On the other side of him, he was the biggest party animal the group had ever seen. Anywhere else, he was the purest angel that everyone believed could do no wrong. But at a party? Park Jimin was a demon. Seductively dancing in a stylish jacket, pants low enough to show his v-line, sweaty hair flipped back pounding shot after shot until he was the last man standing. That guy could party from sun down to sun up like it was a baby shower.

“Did you at least learn anything you missed last year?” Namjoon. Ever the parent. He was surprisingly humble given his father’s status and money. He easily had the best grades among the friends. School always came easy to him, no matter what it was. However, if you saw him outside of school, you’d never be able to guess he was one of the school’s top students. He carried an energy with him that dared anyone to mess with him or his friends. Although you didn’t see it often, he could make himself scary if he wanted to. All in all, he’s just a gentle giant that made sure everyone turned in their work.

“Absolutely nothing. I don’t know why they keep wasting their time on me.” Jungkook sighed. Hoseok threw a pillow from across the couch, smacking him in the face.

“Yah! Don’t talk about yourself like that!” Hoseok was the human charger. It didn’t matter if someone’s mama died if Hoseok was in the room there would be shenanigans. He was always the one to make some crazy dare that would end up getting them in trouble but they wouldn’t be mad because it was totally worth it. He also had great music taste and almost always was on aux. Hoseok’s vice was coke. Often the driving force behind his hyper nature, it started out as just a thing he did at parties, but slowly creeped into his everyday habits. It hadn’t become a problem yet, he vowed that as soon as he started getting nosebleeds he’d stop, although Jungkook was wary of how difficult that was going to be.

“Where’s Y/N and Yoongi?” Jungkook asked after noticing their usual spots empty.

“They left to get food. They should be coming back soon.” Jin assured him, giving him a comical slap on the thigh. Jin was the eldest, but rarely acted like it. Whenever he wasn’t making stupid dad jokes or eating he spent his time at the classical theater where he worked and sometimes acted. He planned on pursuing acting given his “world wide handsome face.” “It just has to be seen! People around the world need to swoon at my beauty” as he would put it.

No one heard the front door open and shut or noticed Y/N and Yoongi standing in the doorway of the living room.

“Food’s here.” Yoongi finally croaked. Hoseok and Jin yelped and sprung up.

“JESUS! Ever heard of announcing yourselves?! I swear you guys are the exact same person!” Y/N just gave a shrug and plopped onto the large bean bag that she’d claimed.

“Hey, Kooker.” She dragged out.

“Hi Y/N..” His unusual bland reply didn’t go unnoticed by her, but she brushed it off.

“You ready to get shit faced?” A playful grin plastered her otherwise tranquil face. A small smile poked at Jungkooks pursed lips. There was something about her character that always put him in a better mood. She was the one who invited him and Tae into the friend group in the first place, and because of that, he couldn’t be more grateful.

Yoongi tossed him a beer can and his car keys. “Start us off Jungkook.” Yoongi was by far the most terrifying one. It took some time to get to know his true person but there were still times when he still scared the shit out of him. Jungkook remembered when he first met Yoongi. He looked like he’d served time with the seasoned look in his eye that said he’d seen some shit in his day. He hadn’t spoken the entire time the group was talking and Jungkook was beginning to worry that he didn’t like him. It wasn’t til he finally spoke that Jungkook could release the breath he was holding. For someone so stoic and cold looking, he never expected him to have such a low, soft voice. He realized, Yoongi wasn’t scary, he was just quiet like him.

Jungkook took the keys and poked a hole in the bottom of the can. He pressed his lips to it and pulled the tab, sending the amber liquor shooting down his throat. He finished it with ease and crushed the can in his palm while the room cheered and chanted.

The loud music, laughing, and drugs drowned out everything in the outside world. It felt like the world ended and they were the last people left on Earth. Nothing mattered but what was right in front of them. The hours flew by until it came time for everyone to crash. Most of them were still raging drunk or high which only made them fall asleep faster. Jungkook didn’t drink much and he barely smoked. He just couldn’t get in the right headspace to enjoy any of it. So there he was, laying awake among a pile of snoring boys at some ungodly hour of the night. His phone buzzed in his pocket. He fished it out to read the text in his notifications.

[We All Knew - Labrinth]

Y/N💜: come to my office

He shimmied out from under Taehyung and Jimin and tiptoed out of the room. He followed the smell of weed through the house because where there was weed, there was Y/N. He stepped into the backyard and found her leaning against the wall, blunt between her fingers. The tip of the dark stick swelled into a bright orange when she took a drag. Smoke rolling out of her nose, she held it out for him. He hesitated.

“You're upset. Take it.” Which was a dead-on observation for Y/N, who’s not normally revolving in the same direction as planet Earth. He hesitantly took a puff from it before handing it back. She spread her arms lazily and looked at him with a beckoning stare. He sighed and walked right into her arms that wrapped around his back. She was only older than him by a year, but her old soul and almost motherly demeanor made him look up to her like she was his idol. Sometimes, he forgot he was a whole head taller than her. “Welcome home, Kookie.”

Hers was the only welcome he got that day that brought a genuine smile to his face. She had a way of making him feel welcome and wanted even if she was in a bad mood. She broke the embrace and without a word headed to the old couch by the empty swimming pool. He eventually followed her and flopped down next to her. Another gush of smoke entered the chilly air and it was handed back to him. Feeling better, he took a healthy drag and sighed out the smoke as he sunk further into the couch.

“Was it that obvious?”

“Was what obvious?”

“Me being upset.”

“Not really.” She flicked the ash off the tip of the brown stick, her gaze not breaking from its spacey stare.

“Then how’d you know?”

“Pain recognizes pain.” Y/N wasn’t one for her genius epiphanies, given that nine times out of ten on any given day she was stoned out of her mind. She wasn’t dumb, god no. He wouldn’t doubt that she was smarter than him, but she rarely exercised her ability. As great of a gift that her mind was, it was an even worse curse. An inescapable tomb of her worst fears, thoughts, and intentions, with nowhere to run and nowhere to hide. So naturally, she tried anything and everything to silence her mind; alcohol, weed, acid, coke, molly, you name it, she’s done it.

Jungkook wasn’t angry or disappointed by the lengths she went. He knew she was just trying to feel better, and to him, that’s all that mattered. He’d take high Y/N over no Y/N at all.

“Y/N?”

“Yep.” There was a silence while he worked up the nerve to speak.

“How…uh….how long have you felt…the way you feel?” She chuckled and let her head fall back against the couch.

“Well I smoked a blunt with Yoongi in the car this morning and then-”

“No, I mean like…w-without drugs.” Her lazy smile didn’t change, but her eyes unfocused and she grew quiet as if lost in a flashback.

“How long do you think I’ve felt this way?” He didn’t anticipate this question.

“Uh…I don’t know…you hide it really well.”

“I couldn’t tell you when it started. I don’t remember much before 7. I’m told I was a happy kid, but it didn’t feel like it at all. All my life I’ve looked around and seen that everyone was so much happier than me, and I’d ask myself, ‘Why can’t I feel like that?’ It wasn’t until I was older that I learned…I was born to suffer. That’s just my place in the world.”

“When did you finally tell anyone?”

“I didn’t. My parents found my razors.” Jungkook always thought he saw scars on her arms and legs, but her milky skin made it hard to tell. It hurt his heart to know that it was true, and that every one of those once caused her pain. The image of her forearms and thighs slick with her blood brewed tears in his eyes.

“They determined they didn’t have the knowledge to help me, so they asked me to take a tour of this mental hospital and think about their suggestion….” She paused to keep her voice from cracking. “I didn’t make it home that day. Never really forgave them after that.”

There was a long silence after that. Jungkook didn’t say anything. There was nothing to say. Besides, he knew she hated condolences. “What made you start using drugs?” She took a drag of the blunt and thought about it.

“I was 13.” Really? “I found my brothers stash of weed in one of his shoes. I already knew what weed was and what it was used for, so I took about a gram and a rolling paper and taught myself how to roll a joint on my bathroom floor. I was shaking like a dog shitting peach seeds but when that joint hit, I thought…” She tilted her head to peak at him with an epiphanic smile, “This is it…This is the feeling that I’ve been waiting to feel my entire life. I thought I was sure to get caught and sent to juvie, but I wasn’t. The world went on, and I found a way to live. Now could my lifestyle kill me? Will it kill me? Yeah probably I don’t know, but at least I could’ve had a few years where I wasn’t begging the universe to put me out of my misery.” She paused to take another hit. “People often ask me, ‘Y/N why don’t you try therapy? Drugs aren’t the answer.’ Yeah well, drugs work. Therapy’s a guessing game; you never know if it’s gonna actually help or not and end up wasting your time and money. But when I take that hit, that line, that tab, the world starts to slow…and everything goes quiet…and I feel safe. In my own head. And I can see the world in color again.”

Jungkook watched her blissful face while she was lost in thought. She must’ve been pretty high because this is the most personal she’d ever gotten with him or possibly anyone that wasn’t Yoongi. “Y/N?”

“Yeah?”

“W-what if I don’t feel what everyone else feels either..?” He pinched the skin between his fingers to keep his tears at bay, a nervous habit he’d picked up from her. She reached over and took his hand in hers, the webbing between her fingers had white and pink stripes from years of fingernails digging into the flesh.

“Jungkook,” she didn’t use his nickname, “I know how hard it was for you to say that. I want you to know how much I appreciate you telling me, because if anyone knows how you feel, it’s me. You can talk to me whenever, wherever. Even when you think it’s a bad time it’s not, because nothing in that moment is more important to me than you. I don’t want you to go through the same thing I did, so please, even if you don’t want to talk, maybe I can at least keep you company.”

For the rest of the night, Jungkook told her everything. About the pressure, the stress, the desire to collapse and let the world go on without him, his inability to see a future where he was fulfilled. The words often caught in his throat, having never said them out loud before. Y/N didn’t say much, she just wrapped them in a blanket and stroked his hair while she just let him talk. Sometimes, he’d have to stop to cry and she’d hold him a little tighter, wipe his tears away with her thumbs, and wait til he was ready again.

Eventually, he had nothing else to say, his tears dried, and his body stilled.

Babies didn’t sleep that good.

Y/N nodded off a little later but was woken up by a raccoon tipping a trash can. She rested her cheek on his head and tried to go back to sleep, but it never came. She just continued to rest her eyes while playing with Jungkook’s hair and tracing lines along his features.

She didn’t know how long she laid there but soon the birds began their routine morning songs and she was sure she wouldn’t get back to sleep now. The faint tap of shoes on the concrete perked her ears, but she kept her eyes closed. The footsteps stopped behind the couch where she sat. It was quiet before the person chuckled quietly. A warm hand smoothed back the hair in her face and a little kiss was planted on her forehead. She couldn’t help the smile that spread across her face.

“Yoongi, I’m awake you creep.” She cracked her eyes open to see her boyfriend laid over the back of the couch hovering above her, his dark hair tickling her nose. He smirked.

“Well in that case,” he grabbed her chin and tilted her head up before capturing her lips in a playful kiss. When they parted, he glanced down at Jungkooks still sleeping figure. “You guys stay out here all night?”

“Yeah,” she looked down at him and smoothed his hair back, “he just had a few things to get off his chest.” Yoongi almost asked what it was about but her face gave him an idea.

“It’s cold, you want me to take him inside?”

“It won’t wake him up will it?”

“If he’s as out as as he looks, he won’t.” She nodded and Yoongi circled around and slipped his hands under the sleeping boy’s body. Much to Y/N’s pleasant surprise, he lifted him bridal style with ease and she followed him into the house where he placed him next to the other slumbering boys.

When he straightened back up he saw her in the sliding glass door, gazing at the now dusty blue sky. She could feel his body heat on her back against the nippy outside air.

“I always loved the time just before dawn.”

“Why is that?” He wrapped his arms around her waist and pressed his cheek to hers.

“It’s so calm and peaceful. And incredibly quiet besides the birds. It’s the only time I feel truly left alone.”

“You want me to show you my favorite time of day?” She turned to him with a curious look. “Follow me.” Not long after, the two were perched on the flat portion of the roof with Yoongi’s bong sitting between them. His angular fingers effortlessly packed the bowl and held it out to her. “All yours.” She took it with a smile.

“What a gentleman~”

Soon, the sky went from a pale blue to pastel shades of orange and pink. He looked over to see her fiddling with a thread on his hoodie she was wearing. “This,” he took her jaw and guided her eyes up for her to see the sunrise, “is my favorite time of day.”

“Why?”

“It gives me hope. Kinda like you.” He was glad she didn’t say anything. She was lost in the color palette of the scene before her, the weed making everything so much more vibrant and striking. He could see the sky reflected in her eyes, making the view ten times better. More time went by and she rested her head on his broad shoulder while they watched the rest of the sunrise.

Back on the ground, Yoongi cleared the bowl and poured out the bong water before setting it on a table by the couch. Y/N was on her back in the center of the empty pool, slowly tearing a leaf above her face and analyzing how it separated cell by cell. He stood on the edge above and watched her do this another four times much to his amusement. “You wanna get breakfast?”

She was out of the pool and in his face before he could finish his sentence. “Like you have to ask.” He chuckled and rolled his eyes before turning and walking to his car. “Hey, Yoongi.”

He turned back.

“Carry me to the car like Jungkook.” He broke into a smirk and walked back to her.

“Yes ma’am.” She let out a yelp when he scooped her off her feet and marched the two of them to his car waiting on the street.

Cover photo: @BIGHITTED on Twitter

#bts #bts fanfic #bts x reader #fanfic #yoongi #yoongi x reader #ot7 x reader #bts fic #yoongi fic #bts angst

[adhd-ahamilton]

C F I M S T Y :) (I'm sorry....) ❤️

Never apologise for responding to these memes :P And oh, one of them’s already done, so that’s ONE less... :P

C: What character do you identify with most?

Lmao that’s a really good question!! It’s funny... I think many of us went through a similar process here, of liking Hamilton and relating to him, but then also encountering Laurens and really relating to him? But I think that’s because Hamilton is a specific kind of person, that a lot of the time it’s less relating to him outright and more... looking to him as an example? Both good and bad. Being enthralled by him and wanting to learn from him and figure out how to take on those qualities of passion and ambition and hard work without also gaining the many negative qualities. And I think that’s part of what interested John about Alex as well - John had so much tendency to self-doubt, and of course there was the whole issue of what he would study and how his dad basically forced him into law, but then there’s Alex who is so sure of what he’s going to do and how he’s going to do it...

But ramble aside: I identify a lot with Laurens like emotionally? And tend to project my insecurities and worries onto him. And also since I am also a white person from a wealthy family I try to kinda... be aware of that through him, as a way to work through what it’s easy to forget in my position and how I need to do better. So I guess I relate to him morally, as well. But... I first did get into this fandom because I saw something in Hamilton that I almost never saw in any other characters. Like, I almost never really relate to characters? There isn’t any character at all I can point to and say ‘yep, they’re just like me’? And Hamilton spoke to me in a bunch of ways I didn’t think I’d ever find. But like I said, it’s also partially a lesson thing - he taught me that I could be the way I was and still work and achieve things and be useful and do good, but it was also kind of a ‘yeah you can do better in THESE ways though, wow’ kind of thing. So though I don’t write from his POV much for various reasons, I definitely relate to him in some really important ways as well.

And uh, beyond this fandom... I love Leslie Knope but I’m more like Ben Wyatt, and there’s a whole bunch of moe anime girls that I relate way too much to (like Suou from Flowers and Hanamaru from Love Live! and oh god, Tsukimi from Princess Jellyfish for sure...)

F: Care to share a favorite hurt/comfort fic?

Hmmmmm! :O There are a lot of good ones by Madtom and Publius in their whole verse! Also, going through my fic tag... wow this one by ciceroprofacto is SO GOOD (it’s not like overtly hurt/comfort but the overtone is definitely there in the end).

And beyond this fandom... I was into Supernatural right before this and lmao, canon-verse Dean/Castiel is like, inherently hurt/comfort :P And yet my favourite is probably this human AU one where Dean is a paraplegic and Cas is a guy who comes in to hang out and talk with people at the care facility and it’s written so so sensitively and avoids a lot of the gross ableist tropes that are so common in this type of fic because it’s written by someone who actually knows their stuff a lot and it’s REALLY GOOD and great!!

(Also just in general I tend to bookmark fic on AO3 when I like them, and I read for a pretty broad array of fandoms, so if you’re looking for recs you might find some you like there!)

I: Do you have a guilty pleasure in fic (reading or writing)?

MAN like I really have a thing for like... stuff to do with intimacy? Specifically, kinda mismatched or forced intimacy or whatever. Like the classic ‘there’s only one bed’ thing, where two characters who are just friends (or, like ‘’just friends’’) suddenly have to share a bed together, or the even MORE classic pretend lovers thing, where two friends have to pretend to be a couple and it’s all awkward and uncomfortable and they start feeling it FOR REAL but then it’s like nooo they’re only pretending, we have to act like we’re so close but we’re not but I wish we were...! MAN it’s so great!! Like IDK there’s just something about characters ending up in this position and it’s awkward but they end up learning so much about each other and then falling for each other and that just makes it even worse... Love it :’)

Or like, I looove like sexual tension and friendships that tip just a bit over too much and that steady slow burn as they get closer and closer and they’re SO CLOSE to getting together but NOT QUITE and they’re so much PINING and TOUCHING and ahhhh!!!!

Also just, projecting as much of myself and various identities and stuff onto characters as possible :P

M: Got any premises on the back burner that you'd care to share?

S-so many... orz hmmMMM here’s a couple!

A modern day AU Hamburrger thing where they dated in college and now they’re both politicians and it comes out and Ham just kinda admits to it because what does he care and now Burr is just *screaming internally* at all times because he actually wanted to keep every tiny bit of his private life out of the public sphere, thanks?

Another Hamburrger thing where Ham is just trying to have a fun sexy time but Burr keeps unintentionally prodding at Ham’s really painful memories and stuff and it all just falls apart

One that I’ll almost certainly never write but: Lams AU assuming Ham dies in 1804 (which I don’t think he would but whatever) and Alex Jr is mourning but it’s difficult at home because he and Eliza never got along that well so he ends up staying over with Laurens instead and somehow they get to talking and finding ways to mourn together and Eliza as well and it’s all awkward and sad but they’re figuring it out eventually somehow

Various other Lams AU things, including: a kind of day in the life thing featuring domesticity and more Ham and Frances interaction, Laurens first moving into the city next to Ham and a LOT of domesticity and also porn?, Ned Stephens showing up and effectively doing the ‘if you hurt him I’ll kill you’ to Laurens, Alex and Eliza talking about the whole ‘Im cheating on you with a man’ thing where they are both irrevocably on different pages and will never agree but at least start to understand each other a little better

John and Francis meeting up during the war. Which sounds like a perfectly simple premise which I totally don’t need to research at all before I start writing it in my head!!!

Also I couldn’t write it myself because I don’t know nearly enough but I’d be really curious to see a Lams fic set in modern times, but like, where they’re both still in the military? Obviously such a fic would have to engage with the whole issue of the American military and all but like, we already have to engage with slavery as a thing, soooo it’s hardly foreign territory (no pun intended).

S: Any fandom tropes you can't resist?

Already covered part of that :P I love those dumb plots that basically revolve around ‘two characters are stuck together! How do they react?’ because there are just so many ways they can go depending on the characters and that’s really interesting!!

I also really love domestic fic including kid fic, historical AUs, interesting formats (like epistolary etc.), Outsider POV, and of course slow burn!

I quite like fandom tropes in general, to the extent that people really do, like... cross-reference the pairing and characters to the trope and write it specifically for them, and not just some Generic Pretend Couple Fic and change the names? I just really like seeing all the subtle differences between different interpretations of the same characters, when it’s done well!

T: Any fandom tropes you can't stand?

Hoo boy :) Well first up, I’m not into D/s, so any kind of A/b/o and slavefic and stuff I just walk right past. And as I implied above, when I get into a pairing, I really like to get into like... what makes that pairing special and unique and different? So I really dislike any stuff which cleaves towards making them more generic, like ‘jock!{character}/nerd!{character}’ type fic, which usually just ends up exactly the same as any other jock/nerd fic. (Also maybe it’s just cause I’m Aussie but we...didn’t ever actually have strict groupings like that in high school? So those fic in particular are just. Bizarre to me.)

Related, I tend not to like high school/college/coffee shop AUs because they’re usually like really overtly ‘hey this is what it is like for people here!! haha doesn’t it reflect your time in college really well? this is just what things are like for me!!’ and they are...usually not relatable to me. At all. Because my experiences are quite weird;;; So I just. don’t enjoy reading them because it makes me feel bad lol.

And uhhhh I really dislike fic where people go hard on the sarcasm and stuff? Like it mostly just ends up making them sound like assholes. I admit I’m particularly sensitive to this but I really, really hate people who mock and insult other people for just being themselves and doing what they want and 90% of snarky seems to be about that, especially when done by inexperienced writers. But even experienced writers do this sometimes when they get this idea that banter is good writing 100% of the time or that it’s too ‘’’simple’’’ just to write a character being like... nice? Or genuine? (Like holy shit I got soooo damn sick of snarky!Castiel like yeah great he is sarcastic OCCASIONALLY in canon, he’s not a grumpy asshole 24/7, where do people get this??? But it’s also something that comes up a lot in Hamilton musical fic and. yeah.)

Aaaand that’s probably enough lmao thanks for asking again!!! :D