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#bad parenting
defiantsuggestions · 2 months ago
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If a child is so afraid of getting in trouble that they don't come to their parents when they make a mistake that could possibly put their health or even their life in danger, then those parents have failed.
If something goes wrong, and the first thing that child thinks is, "oh god, my parents are gonna kill me," then the parents have failed.
If a child is afraid of their parents, if the child sees their parents as an active threat instead of a source of safety and guidance, then the parents have failed.
A parents job is to protect, to teach, to guide.
If a parent makes themself a danger to the child, in any capacity, then that parent has failed.
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artish-calamity · a month ago
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Are there any fics where Vlad finds out about Danny being a halfa and immediately is like “Omg his own parents got him killed” and tries to save Danny from his parents?
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ashersskye · 3 months ago
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I think a lot of people hear, "you must love yourself first before you love someone else," and think it means you must physically be in love with yourself. That's not it at all. You must know yourself- your values, your ethics/morals, your boundaries, how you handle stress, what makes you upset, how you handle anger, how you handle other people's anger, how you treat yourself and other people when you're upset, your flaws, your "toxic traits"- you must self inspect and hold yourself accountable for your own growth alongside another person when you're in a relationship. That's what it means to love yourself. That part never ends. If you aren't aware of these things then someone will come along and take advantage of you, or you might take advantage of someone else.
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altagraye · 4 months ago
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Stuck A/B/O Series Part 1
Stuck (Alpha!Stuckyx Omega!fem!reader) Series
Part 1-a rock and hard places
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!!! T.W.: physical abuse by parent, emotional abuse by both parents, A/B/O dynamics, language, hurt and comfort. insecure reader, reader needs a hug from her Alphas, Polyamory.
Part 1: A Rock and Hard places
A/N: Y/N’s parents names are Annie and Joseph
This was a horribly bad idea. But Gods you needed them. They were everything to you. And in truth, you were everything to them and more. You seethed at the thought of not being completely theirs. Being stuck inside this limbo, this constant back and forth. You were the only Omega living in the compound that was unclaimed. You were a tennis ball and the rackets were your parents' house and the Avengers Compound. But ever since your father had that foundation shaking car accident on his commute to work when you were in your senior year of high school, you felt obligated, dutiful as you are the only child they had. Your parents were not the typical dynamic couple. Your mother is an Alpha and your father is a Beta. The accident left him wheelchair bound and your tiny family of three financially crippled. For five months you'd follow the pattern of going to school, coming home, doing whatever you could in the house as chores, homework that needed your immediate attention, Mom calling you out from the house to visit Dad a hour away in the hospital. He didn't look the same at all. He was this swollen monster hooked up to numerous machines, all equipped with their own monotonic melodies. 
Your friends from highschool barely knew, you'd put your emotional mask on the moment you would spot them walking to the bus stop in the morning. Soft giggles, smiles, and inside jokes is what you armed yourself with. You couldn't let the storm break through, you could never tell them about your dad. About how he'd had a seizure the night before but came out of it okay. About how he cried and said he was sorry when he woke up. About how you had to be strong for your mother too. Your friends didn't need that, they didn't want that kind of drama put onto them. The only drama they knew about was how the cliques did or didn't get together to form alliances to defeat the Preppy bitches or whomever was dumb enough to fuck with the little guys. You surprised yourself by passing even if it was just barely. You'd graduated and it didn't even feel right. You'd felt cheated by fate. You remember one night during choir in highscool, your last performance, looking into the crowd to see if they'd showed up and  weeping when you didn't find their faces. That stinging pain in your chest and eyes watered over when you heard your choirmates wave to their family members attending. You should have gotten a clue then, that, something wasn't alright with your parents and that you deserved better.  
But that was a million light years away from what was happening now. You never knew you'd be joining the company of THE AVENGERS. If anything in your life went right, it was that. And you were grateful for the opportunity to be with them. They felt like a breath of fresh air, more so like you were breathing for the first time. You found great friendship in Wanda and were more closed off to Nat, but warmed up to her eventually. You weren't a tomboy and weren't a girly girl either. Rather you found yourself in the middle. You'd gotten there from one of your days out grocery shopping. Wanda was the one who'd recruited you, having a freak accident with a bicycle paperboy and a Mack truck almost happen before your eyes. You did it like normal, a reflex in both muscle and thought. Seeing it just about to collide in front of you, bringing your arms forward and flashing your fingers outward, like magic it had stopped.  
Your arms still full with grocery bags, you had to act fast, after all you only had 45 seconds and the clock was ticking. You weren't even sure you had the strength. Ten seconds gone. You grab the Paperboy's arms and tug, working against the stillness of your powers and the gravity weighing him down. Ten more seconds gone. You wished you'd paid more attention in gym class as you tugged budging him just enough. This time giving it all you had, you heaved and, in the knick of time saved him. The Mack truck whooshing by as if nothing would have happened. The paperboy was wildly angry with you, not the praise you'd expected from saving the gentleman.  You could pause time momentarily. Wanda came up to you and gave you her number. By nighttime you were invited to a Tony Stark gala.
That’s right, the fucking Tony Stark wanted to see you, just some Omega treading water in New York City. You were surprised your mother even let you go, but in hindsight you figured she couldn’t pass up the chance to have her Omega daughter be seen and scented in a superhero Alpha den like the Avengers Tower. She’d used you to tell all her co-workers that you went to a Stark gala just to advance her Alpha ego. Your relationship with your mother was beyond fractured. poisoned from the word go. 
Having a birth mother be an Alpha was pretty rare. you were born too early as a result. Her own Alpha hormones saw you as a threat, tried to attack you from within the womb. the both of you were essentially killing each other. She almost lost her life when you were born. and you were left with severely scarred lungs. You were born at 26 weeks.  An impossibly tiny baby girl clinging to life, weighing  only 1 pound and 5 ounces. You stayed in the NICU for the first three months of your life. Steve and Bucky, your Alphas said you were born a fighter. But you didn’t see it.
They were your rocks, they made you so happy. if it was up to you, you would have been claimed by them by now, but both your perfect Alphas, were traditionalists. You couldn't blame them for that nature, not only were they Alphas, but they were both from the 40s. After all that’s why you were here back at home, to take care of your father and to ask for their permission to be claimed by Steve Rogers and James Barnes. Steve was one of the most esteemed Alphas in history but your other Alpha, the scarred one, Bucky that’s what you thought your parents would have trouble with. This is going to be a disaster, they’d never say yes to you being claimed by Bucky. Sure he was an Alpha and by today’s standards polyamorous relationships have been more widely accepted. 
You were so afraid of what your parents might think about his reputation as the Winter Soldier, you wept by yourself in your room for it. You loved him so much there was no way you could think of a future without him. Not without both your Alphas by your side, together for the rest of your years. You wanted that so bad, and you wanted to have their pups. They’d be such great Alpha Dads. But that felt like a fucking pipedream. It took everything you had to be here and say those words to them tonight. To ask permission like a good, docile, Omega that you were raised to be.
Dinner was finished and you decided it was now or never, your palms clammy and your throat dry. You took a sip of water, chills traveling at lightning speed up and down your spine. Your Mom noticed this and didn’t let it slink past her. She was an Alpha after all.
“You reek of nervousness, Y/N. What’s on your mind?” she asked. You cleared your throat as your father perked up, staring at you with a curious intrigue. You tucked a lock of hair behind your ear, you found yourself choking on your words. they were stuck inside your throat. You averted eye contact. A growl came from across the dinner table, a primal sign forcing you to spit out your words.
“I-I wanted to ask your permission. to be, um. To be c-c-claimed by Steve Rogers, a-a-an-and B-B-Bucky Barnes.” you struggled to force the words out. Your mother’s eyebrows raised at Steve’s name but clenched together at the mention of Bucky’s. You fucking knew it. You knew this was a bad idea. you almost broke then and there. 
but you had no time to sort out your emotions. And they spoke to each other as if you weren’t in the room. Only acknowledging your presence periodically to answer their questions.
Annie: "I've never seen her work hard for anything."  
Joseph: "You're running into a trainwreck"
Annie: "What? What the fuck is wrong with you, Y/N? That's not natural, she has to pick one. Joseph she is like this because you always let her get away with shit!!"
Joseph: "Like hell Annie, maybe if you would have let her hang out with her friends more often she wouldn't act out by falling for bad boys."
Annie: "He's a criminal Joseph! She fell in love with a stone cold murderer!"
Annie: "God how are they gonna get any money? Or- or health insurance?! You know what kind of meager wages they make." Annie claps her hand to her face gasping in silent realization," oh my god, are you pregnant? Is that why you're doing this? A super soldier's pup?! Jesus I thought we taught you better than that!"
You: "What? No, I'm not pregnant. But why would it matter if I was? Steve and Bucky, they--"
Annie: " they what? Love you? I knew you were stupid but not that stupid."
Joseph: "Look sweetheart, we care about you. You've still got time to make a decision. At least you're not pregnant. We all know how your aunt Rhonda turned out. You wouldn't survive in  the streets, hungry, alone, and ready to pop like a balloon. We don't want that for you."
You: "They'd never abandon me like that. We've never had an argument and they'd never hit me. Not in a million years."
Joseph: "Never had an argument? Y/N, You're stuck in a fairytale, sweetheart. That can't be real. It won't last"
Annie: "You need to go back to school! Quit keeping your head in the clouds with them. How long have you even known them?"
You: "three years is long enough, Mom." your voice was so quiet, any amount of hope you had mustered up before was being shattered.
Annie: " yet you've never lived with them? What's the longest amount of time you've spent with them?"
You: " there was a couple times I was able to spend the weekend with them alone. Mom, they're always busy. They save the-- no. We save the world from countless bad people. You have no idea what kind of stress we have to deal with."
Annie-  scoffs "Stress? You want to talk about stress? The neighborhood wouldn't give us the time of day because of you! I worked so hard to get you to learn but nothing ever stuck! I can't believe I gave birth to such a retarded abomination! You've always been a freak! Y/N! I had a job at 14. 14! You're 26 and you're frolicking around with, Superheroes?! Get a fucking life! I had to take care of you because you were always sick! Working dead beat jobs just to put food in your mouth and clothes on your back and medicine in your system because your too feeble. You can't handle that. The real world is gonna chew you up and spit you out buttercup! Look at me when I'm talking to you!!" 
Annie slaps you across the cheek and your glasses go flying across the room. She grabs your hair tightly and close to the root slapping your face continuously. You are crying uncontrollably you don't notice your lip is busted and bleeding. You have to pause the situation. You do, and you run out of that place, didn’t think about going back to grab your shoes. Your phone was in your pocket and you tugged it out into your palm shaking.
You couldn’t bring yourself to dial Steve or Bucky’s numbers, you couldn’t believe what had just happened, but part of you knew it would end like this. Your mom has been abusing you off and on since you presented as an Omega at 13. you had no idea why she treated you so bad. Aren’t Alphas supposed to protect Omegas? It was snowing outside and all you had on your feet was a pair of socks.
You followed the sidewalks of blocks until you found the Avengers Compound just outside the main part of the city resting near the river. You felt like a broken phantom of yourself. A shell lost in space. Nat opened the door  and you couldn’t bring yourself to make eye contact. 
She immediately noticed your busted lip and bruises starting to form on your jawline. Her scent was mildly comforting since Nat was an Alpha too but you needed your Alphas. Nat brought you into the compound.
“Y/N? What happened? Where are your glasses? Your shoes? Who did this to you?”  She crouched down, peering up at you as tears started to form on your features. Your teeth chattered wildly, frigid from exposure to the elements.
You started to hyperventilate and thought you might pass out. You needed Steve and Bucky right now. Experiencing this kind of trauma without the support of your Alphas, could be deadly. Nat knew this and yelled out for them. You’re sure your distressed scent had wafted through the entire complex by now. Most of the avengers were in the living room, keeping their distance. no one wanted a fight to break out with you in such rough shape and your Alphas seeing you like this.
You heard their heavy footsteps but couldn’t bring yourself to look at them. Steve’s scent hit your nose first, Musk and the kind of smell you associated with an Irish Pub. His hand went straight to your own. Nat left to get some blankets.
“Omega-Darling? Baby Girl, Who did this?” Steve tried to get you to speak but you were still lost. Bucky made it to you last, staring at you from the threshold of the hallway, his features shocked and confused. 
Bucky walked up to you, his hand cradling your cheek very gently. He’d had more than enough experience of being out-of-it, so he could pull you out better than Steve. Bucky gingerly dragged your nose to his scent gland, on his neck, purring to calm you. He smelled like cedar and forest rains.
“Doll?” he uttered and that was enough to break you. Your knees gave out and Bucky caught you, cradling you tight to his chest. You sobbed and wailed like a defeated animal. Steve stood in shock, anger brewing and bubbling beneath the surface. Nat returned with the blankets, fresh and unscented by anyone. She got too close however and Steve snapped at her. growling possessively and even his claws came to the surface.
“Back off, Nat. She’s our Omega. We take care of her.” he warned ending his sentence with a firm growl. 
“Shhh. Shhh. Hey. It’s alright, ‘Mega. We’re here. Both your Alphas are here.” Bucky cooed as he took you down the hallway. Steve followed close behind. You needed the safety of your nest and your Alphas. Bucky sat on the bed cradling you in his chest, continuing to purr until you stopped crying. Steve scented blankets and draped them over your shivering form, grabbing your hand and stroking it gently with his thumb. Steve too was on the bed, as close as he could get to you and Bucky.
it was an hour before you could regain some sense about you. Steve perked up, noticing something change in your features.
“Alphas?” you questioned. Steve let out a gasp of relief, smiling bittersweetly. Happy to see his Omega back.
“They said no, Alphas. They said no. M-Mom was so angry. She hit me. I just wanna be a good Omega. I just wanna be a good Omega.” you were starting to lose yourself again.
Steve leaned in and began fervently kissing and licking your scent gland, where he was supposed to put his claim. “Their opinion doesn’t matter. they hurt you. We’ll make it all better my sweet Darling Omega.” preened your Cap.
“You’re an amazing Omega, Y/N.” Bucky said softly.
“You don’t mean that.” you choked out feeling so insecure in that moment.
“Yes you are Baby Girl. You’re the best Omega we could hope for. We love you so much.” Cap continued his encouragement.
“I love you too. Both of you. I can’t live without you...Alphas? Do you mind if we stay like this for a while?” you asked.
“Of course,” your Alphas replied in unison. You knew you’d have to tell them every detail. but you were drained and didn’t have the mental stamina left. You just drowned in their beautiful scents and fell fast asleep in your nest, with them watching over you. They’d protect you, they’d keep you safe, and that was all that mattered.
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yashieverlore13 · 5 months ago
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Your child doesn't argue with you even when you're wrong.
Your child doesn't question your decisions
Your child never asks unnecessary questions.
Your child's teacher never has a complain about them.
Your child doesn't demand useless things
Your child doesn't share stupid details about their life and is mostly quiet.
Your child is well mannered scared of you.
You are a great bad parent.
You ruined their childhood.
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muskka · 12 months ago
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Bonus page of follow up of the previous series of HorrorBerry Here Thanks to @jessufay  for asking for these pages <3 Also !! Here is Small Snak ^^
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depressionbound · 2 months ago
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You know what I fucking hate?
When parents are always wondering why their kids aren’t honest with them anymore, and never realize that their own non-receptive behaviour, or their failure to listen and keep. Things. Private. Are the reasons why. As if wanting to keep something completely normal to yourself is a crime. They always say you can tell them anything, but really they just want to know if they were right, or to ease their own suspicions, or because they are too controlling and needy for privacy.
And they think just because they raised you, that they should know everything about you, that you shouldn’t hide anything from them. But in reality they just never grasp the fact that some kids don’t want to share everything happing in their private lives. Like if their child doesn’t want to tell them something then they suddenly transform into a fucking Interrogation expert and bombard you with questions until you break down and tell them, and their fine with tiring you out until you tell them, they don’t seem to care, they’re just glade they know what you didn’t want them too,while you only told them, just to end the conversation. They see it as another win, but really they just confirmed that you will never be honest with them ever again.
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defiantsuggestions · a month ago
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You were not a bad child. You were not difficult. You were not a burden. You were not evil.
You were a child.
It was the people around you who had a problem
And it was the people around you who were selfish enough to take their problems out on a child who was too small and helpless to defend themself.
It was the people around you who raised you to hate yourself.
And it's hard to believe when that awful environment is all you've known
But there are people out there who would be horrified at the way you've suffered
And there are people out there who would think you're amazing
It's not your fault you grew up in an abusive household
They're the ones who chose to mistreat you
And they were the ones who convinced you to blame yourself
And you deserve better
I promise you, you deserve better
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odinsblog · 2 months ago
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This is fucking crazy. Nearly 2,000 new cases of coronavirus (just since August 2nd!) and some parents still want to “opt out” of having their children wear face masks? And Governor Ron DeSantis is still threatening to withhold funding for any school districts that make wearing face masks mandatory? WTF?
The Republican Party is a death cult, and their Darwinian mindset is a threat to public safety. This is no less than reckless child endangerment.
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ashersskye · a month ago
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Does anyone talk about the amount of brainwashing that comes with being raised by abusive parents? As children we are conditioned to love our parents because of how much time we spend together, and despite the abuse there will be good times thrown in as well; and you may even be exposed to your abusive parents' history of abuse evoking a strong sense of sympathy and loyalty to your parents. All of this doesn't negate the fact that you parents are being toxic towards you, belittling you, stepping all over your boundaries, blaming you & scapegoating you, physically hitting you & neglecting giving you the love, affection, and attention you need. It is so SO hard to break that programming in our brains that tells us to love our parents regardless of how they've treated us-- let alone the way society glorifies parenting at every corner with statements like, "your parents gave you life, you must always respect them no matter what," failing to realize that abusive parents exist. It took me years to finally break that programming and finally see my mother for who she is: a toxic bitch who no longer has access to my life. It is one of the hardest things about recovery, and I don't think it's talked about enough.
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mintedpotters · 20 days ago
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I'm back with another parenting hot take:
Withholding food from your children is abusive.
Shaming your children for their appetites is abusive.
Force feeding your child is abusive. (No, I'm not talking about medically necessary situations, don't try it.)
Your kids are gonna end up with some type of disordered eating habits because of the way you've chosen to traumatise their relationship with food or their bodies.
You should be teaching your children how to recognise and listen to their body's cues, not overriding them to suit yourself.
Your children's needs are not negotiable. If that sounds scary or unfair to you, don't have kids.
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Dear Parents,
Even if your child has a grumpy attitude, you don't have to instigate a fight.
It is very easy to simply let your child stew for a few minutes. Either they'll forget why they're upset, get tired from how worked up they are, or hold on to their anger a lot longer than necessary and finally conk out because of it.
If the kid is frowning in the backseat with their arms folded, you don't have to talk to them. You don't have to force some conversation out of them. Leaving them alone works just fine.
Approaching someone in a bad mood, with matching or worse hostility, and then getting shocked when they aren't able to be civil, is the height of stupidity.
Why people act like a bad attitude is so hard to deal with is beyond me. Kids don't have to be happy all the time. They shouldn't smile or be happy just so you don't feel out of control of the situation. I can't tell you how many times Sperm Donor told me to smile or else. All because me being unhappy 'made him look bad' or 'set a bad example'.
Too many parents are out here egging their unhappy kids on, knowing damn well it'll have a negative effect. They do this so they can have a reason to punish their kid. They need to let out some aggression in an 'acceptable' manner and their kid is the only person available for bullying because society views the child as the property of the parent and not their own person. Therefore it's viewed as okay to be harsh to you own child.
So what if you're kid is pouting because you wouldn't buy them cotton candy at the fair? So what if they're grumpy because you lied about stopping at McDonald's before heading home? So what if they're on the verge of tears because you forced them to come in at curfew?
Kids are allowed to be upset. If they aren't screaming at you or throwing shit at you, leave them alone. You know it's a potentially volatile situation and instead of letting things relax, you want to make it worse just so you can stroke your fragile ego?
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zuko-always-lies · 23 days ago
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Lao and Poppy Beifong are pretty blatantly bad parents, but I have to say “we don’t want our 12 year old daughter running around a warzone as a child soldier” has to be some of the most reasonable parenting in ATLA.
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wilting-willows-wallow · 4 months ago
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Me: Trying to acknowledge the messed up things my parents did
Also me: Trying not to demonize my parents because they're humans and make mistakes as parents
But Also me: Am I just trying to excuse/minimize the stuff they did?
Finally Result= Internal Screaming
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