#and then at least a good 3rd is experimental shit she or one of her friends made for her to see if it would work

[miscellaneous--bones]

some basic stuff for gal's wardrobe. i tend to think that because of how the legs move three piece clothing is the easiest and most comfortable to put on and otherwise move in. i think the hardest part is figuring out what she would have style wise and what shed be able to get tailored vs what shed have scrounged. other than hoodies and tshirts pretty much everything has to be tailored, unfortunatly.

#i feel like half her wardrobe is stuff she likes to wear out bc its her style (more comfort or grunge focused shit) #and then at least a good 3rd is experimental shit she or one of her friends made for her to see if it would work #and then the last bit is just for specific occassions #i figure with hextupods the concept of ''nudity'' is very individual based. gal feels pretty ok w/o clothes all together if shes #with other sextupods and sometimes the turtles but especially around humans and such for example she might start feeling kinda naked #otherwise its more so if shes like only wearing shoes is weird those should be worn with clothes #or like ONLY a middle peice then shes like i wanna at least cover my butt #etc #its situational #adelaid on the other hand only wears clothes if its for practicality like if its cold or she needs shoes for certain terrain #i think other than like. slippers or some socks shes only got the three pairs of shoes i drew here but she deffinetly have some more #shirts n shit #so yk #hextupod #oc #art #doodles #Galileo #spec bio

[lizisshortforlizard]

Living Dangerously - Chapter 20

Jurassic Park’s animal handlers: none of them ever mentioned by name in Michael Crichton’s original novel. Who were they? What were their lives like on Isla Nublar? Did any of them survive the disaster?

A year in the life of those responsible for the care of the dinosaurs. Many people would kill to have their jobs.

But would they die for it?

Jurassic Park Novel/Jurassic Park Film (1993)

Viewpoint: 3rd person female oc

Warnings: minor descriptions of surgery, bad language

Word Count: ~62.2k (21 Chapters) [incomplete]

Tagging: @heresthefanfiction @howlingmadlady @arrthurpendragon @ocappreciation I never got around to posting this one at the time so you get 2 chapters today!

Read on Ao3

Chapter 19 | Chapter 21

St. Elmo’s Fire - John Parr

Muldoon was pleased. The experimental dilophosaur surgery was going ahead. Hammond had been convinced, eventually.

Not without a little blackmail from Armstrong, who he’d brought along to make his case. She’d played the part very convincingly, squinting hard through her glasses at Isla Nublar’s legal team sitting directly across from her.

Regis and Gennaro had started visibly trembling when she laid it on thick about suing InGen for damages, using all the right jargon to really make them sweat.

While she was doing what she did best, talking at great length and speed, Muldoon noticed Regis’ eyes darting everywhere around the room but at Armstrong. He didn’t dare look at her now. At least, not when he was there.

Good.

Now, they just had to capture a dilophosaur without getting too close. There was still no telling how far those animals could actually spit, and he didn’t have any staff willing to find out the hard way.

For certain, he’d need at least one other person who was a decent shot.

Too bad he wasn’t allowing Armstrong anywhere near that paddock.

Muldoon recalled when he’d broke the news she wouldn’t be getting revenge on the dinosaur who wronged her.

Armstrong had come crashing into his office, looking surprisingly cheerful after being in close quarters with Kennedy amongst the cleaning supplies.

“First of all-“ she started.

”You were acting like children.”

”He was! I-“

”Hurry up with the point you came here to make.”

“We’ve had a breakthrough.” Lizzy gently placed her hands down flat on the desk. “I found out why he’s been such a dick to me!” She sounded pleased with herself.

Muldoon just sighed, waiting for her to notice.

Lizzy corrected herself. “Right, sorry. Why he’s…a bit of a prat in general?” She was bouncing in the balls of her feet in excitement.

“Please calm down.”

“Can’t. We have an understanding now…” She trailed off, realising she was in danger.

She thought fast to keep to the bare minimum of detail. Outing Tom meant she would be outing herself too. And Lizzy just wasn’t ready to come clean with what a pathetic start in life she’d had before she started to fight back against the odds. Not to Kathy, not to anyone.

“His dad is awful. Really awful. He’s had it rough looking after the rest of his family.” She fumbled.

Muldoon just stared back at her for what felt like an age while Lizzy’s palms went clammy.

Shit shit shit. He’s figured me out.

“He told you that much?”

Lizzy nodded earnestly. Please move on.

“That’s a shame. But not really an excuse for how he treats you. Or Baker for that matter.”

Phew.

Too close.

“He needs help, without it looking like you’re trying. He’s close to Richardson, but-“ Lizzy screwed up her face “-Mike’s not a great person. And he wouldn’t listen to me anyway. So, I was thinking-“

Muldoon saw where this was headed. “No, I already have a child. Who I see far less often than my employees.”

Lizzy was exasperated. “Come on! Maybe some positive reinforcement could go a long way with him…”

“Positive reinforcement? You are an animal ethologist, not a psychologist.”

”Both ‘ologist’, aren’t they? Potato, tomato.”

”That’s not- never mind. Say what you mean.”

“I think you need to mentor him.”

Muldoon shook his head. “Honestly, Armstrong. That’s asking far too much.”

”It just might make life bearable for everyone. Please?”

“No.”

”You could let him tranq the dilo for Gerry?” Lizzy suggested confidently. “I’ve heard him bragging he’s a good shot. Maybe put that to the test?”

That wasn’t a terrible idea, come to think of it…

It was incredibly hard to say no outright.

Damn her, he couldn’t do it.

“I’ll think about it. I need to have a word with him anyway about exactly what happened when the dilophosaur attacked you.”

He had been putting it off so far. The prospect of having a chat with the lad alone made him distinctly uncomfortable.

”Oh, right, yeah-“ She adjusted her glasses. “Perfect.”

She was impossible. Who else would try so damn hard to help someone that had made their life Hell?

“While we’re on the subject, you aren’t helping fetch the animal in.”

“What?” She didn’t sound surprised, just disappointed.

“Until we get them all neutralised, you’re only allowed near one if it’s unconscious.” Muldoon shrugged. “You can take notes, write the surgery up as a report to give to Hammond. You’ll enjoy that.”

“Oh, will I now?”

“I know you will. You’d better.”

“Then you’ll talk to Tom for me?” Lizzy finished hopefully as she headed for the door. “Please?”

She just wasn’t going to let it go.

Muldoon nodded resignedly. ”I’ll talk to him.”

***

“Kennedy, a word.”

“I didn’t do it!” The Texan blurted out automatically as he turned around, then looked annoyed at himself. “I mean, uh-“

She really owes me for this one.

“When Armstrong was attacked by the dilophosaur…if I find out you got her back to Harding at anything less than the speed of light-“

“I had my foot to the floor boss, I swear it.” Kennedy insisted. “I couldn’t have gone any faster on that road without totalling the Jeep.”

“Rather admirable, considering the way you two behave?”

”She winds me up but, y’know…” Kennedy tried hard to say what he felt. He too, seemed painfully uncomfortable. “She gives it back. She gets so mad, her face goes all red. It’s…funny, I guess.”

“I thought it was more serious than that. You understand why I’m questioning the speed you drove at?”

“Dude, c’mon. I don’t actually want to hurt her, that’s messed up.” He muttered, clearly embarrassed. “But she’s way too bossy, and someone around here has to keep her on her toes.”

To even his own surprise, Muldoon chuckled. “I suppose that’s true enough.” The lad did have a point.

“Can I go now?”

“In a moment. One more thing.”

Damn Armstrong. Damn her and her big hopeful eyes, damn her to Hell, all her fault-

“Good work, acting so quickly.”

Kennedy looked startled. His mouth stopped its progress of curling up into a sneer and instead fell open. He grumbled quietly before turning on a dime and marching away.

”Thanks, boss.”

***

What is one supposed to do on their days off when living on an island, without a cinema, library or bowling alley? When none of your friends even have the same day off as you do?

Lizzy liked to observe. She’d sometimes tag along with her team anyway just for the Hell of it, or go to the beach with her notebook and camera.

She wasn’t the best at sketching in her coffee-stained book, but she liked it, to wind down. It was important to her, for all the good memories she’d eventually take away from the island.

And that day, observing was exactly what she was going to do. Observe a dinosaur being cut wide open.

Alone with Gerry Harding while everyone else played Whack-A-Dilo, scrubbing up for the surgery, a question she’d been dying to ask him was fizzing in the back of her brain. She felt like it would just explode out of her if she didn’t say it right that second.

“Gerry?” Lizzy knocked the faucet off with her elbow. “You’ve been divorced twice, now, right?”

The veterinarian hesitated, in the middle of tearing up great handfuls of cotton wool. “I’m not sure I like where this is going-“

“Serious question, do you regret getting married in the first place?“

Gerry answered instantly. “Not at all.”

“Huh.” Not the answer she was expecting, or hoping for.

“The only thing I regret is how badly it tore up Sarah, and Jess, both times it ended.” Harding looked the most pained she had ever seen him, even under the surgical mask she could tell it hurt still, years later. “Sarah wouldn’t speak to me for a long time.”

“I’m sorry.” She meant it, as much as she disliked her fellow ethologist. No kid deserved a fractured family.

“Why do you ask?”

”No reason.” She avoided looking at him.

“Hey!” Harding clicked his tongue and eyeballed her. “I need you sharp as a tack for this procedure. The first of its kind in the world. Whatever’s bothering you, get it off your chest before they turn up with the dinosaur. I mean it.”

”It’s nothing.”

Harding mock-gasped. “Let me guess. You got the hots for someone else! Is it me?”

“Oh, trust me, I’m just barely holding myself back from jumping your bones.” She shook her head. “No, I wish Simon would either move to Costa Rica or stop giving me a hard time about planning the wedding.”

Harding stared at her. ”Jesus. You don’t really want to get married, do you?”

“I just don’t think I’m ready yet. I’ve told him before. But I don’t think he’ll take postponing again very well.” Lizzy snorted. “He might actually break up with me this time.”

“Okay?”

”But if I have to go and pick out napkins and silverware, I might break up with him.”

She couldn’t think of anything more tedious and pointless. All that for one day’s use, for only a few hours? What a waste.

“This sounds very much-“ Harding snapped on a fresh pair of gloves. “-like you two need to sit down on the same continent and talk without worrying about the phone bill.”

“Urgh…”

”Instead of running off to yet another time zone. Or, maybe call it quits. If you’re already thinking about it, you probably need to just rip the Band-Aid off. Thank me later.” Harding was much more matter-of-fact than she would have preferred.

Lizzy started getting irate.

“He’s been in my life for ten years, Gerry! It feels like such a waste at this point, having to start over.”

“Yeah, so?”

“I hate waste.”

Harding had noticed, she always cleared her plate completely at dinner, even when she began to look a bit green. Always pushed back the washing of her uniform a day too long so it would last longer. Old habits died hard.

“Sure, if you call it quits you have to start from scratch at thirty-four, but would you rather that or another ten years of whatever you’re doing now?”

Ten more years of limbo? Where are we living? Who’s going to sacrifice their career for the other? ‘Liz, dawhl, when are you going to give my son a baby?’

“And getting married won’t fix something that’s already broken. Ha!” Harding rolled his eyes. “Took me two attempts to figure that one out!”

”I love him.” Lizzy insisted. “I still do.”

”But are you in love with him?” Harding pressed. “That’s the difference.”

“I…hm…” She didn’t have an answer for that one.

“Ah, ignore this old man. You do what you think is best.” Harding winked at her. “I may be a little biased since you’re still in the running to be wife number three. I’d have you, no questions asked.”

“Keep hoping, Gerry.” Lizzy joked, but she had an uneasy feeling clawing it’s way into her stomach, making her nauseous. His words were echoing around in her head, over and over.

…Am I still in love with him?

“Doubt you’d be by yourself for long anyway…” Harding muttered under his breath, not intending Lizzy to hear him.

“Yeah, right!” She called back. “Who’d want this?”

Christ, guess it’s true that if you lose your vision, your hearing improves Harding thought.

The vet shook his head, covering his slip-up quickly. “Doesn’t matter.” But he had to wonder. Armstrong was pulling his leg, she had to be. Couldn’t she see it?

“What do you-“ Lizzy was abruptly cut off by the radio on her belt crackling.

”Ready when you are, over.” Muldoon’s voice filled the small room.

A few seconds of silence. The vet and the ethologist waited, holding their breath.

Then Kathy’s voice. “She’s down and out. Great shot, Tom.”

Lizzy grinned to herself. So her advice had been taken.

Interesting.

Harding made a noise of approval and continued prepping.

”Oh, Lizzy- Remind me to chase Wu for the analysis on the saliva, can’t believe I even have to ask-“ The vet grumbled.

“Harding, so you know - Hammond’s en route, over.” Muldoon spoke up again.

The veterinarian swore loudly and set down his instrument tray with a clatter.

“And under no circumstances is that man allowed to scrub up! I do not want him in here peering over my shoulder.”

”Got it.” Lizzy nodded.

***

A peculiar sight indeed, Muldoon thought. The surgical drape covered the jaws and tucked-up head frill, with four scaly legs sticking straight up in the air at each corner of the operating table.

The animal handlers were all jostling for space outside at the tiny window, eager to get a better look at the live dissection.

Harding was poking around inside the creature with Kennedy passing him instruments and Armstrong keeping track of his progress in her notebook.

Muldoon could tell her tongue was sticking out with concentration under the mask as she sketched and annotated while Harding dictated his thoughts aloud to her.

She had been correct. Kennedy was an excellent shot, cool as ice when he calmly lined up his target. Even better than she was, though Muldoon had no intention of telling Armstrong that.

As Harding sliced through yet more layers of skin and muscle, Muldoon thought back to her own shooting practice with him, and how her stumble off the Jeep hadn’t been the end of the awkwardness.

***

Lizzy was still trying and failing to get her bearings on the bumpy trip back to base. It wasn’t her swollen tongue that made it difficult for her to talk. Her brain still felt a bit scrambled and she didn’t understand why.

At least the lisp had worn off.

“I thought you said no weapons were allowed on the island?”

“Weapons. Plural. This one is mine, anyway. Singular.”

Armstrong did seem to be in a better mood after their exploits out in the park. The woman was so peculiar, never a dull moment.

Although there was a burning question, a detail that he needed explaining.

“You’re left-handed but you shoot from your right, why?”

“I have to, my shoulder can’t take it. Aches for days afterwards.”

“Something happen?” He pressed.

“Dislocated it when I was in high school, never healed properly.” Lizzy answered in a clipped tone.

Don’t ask anything else.

Please.

“How did you manage that?” No such luck.

I fell out of a tree. I was playing hockey at school. I slipped down the stairs. Or some other casually delivered sentence that would stop his line of questioning in its tracks.

But she couldn’t lie for shit, and she froze up.

“Can’t say.” Lizzy shook her head and stared out of the window, refusing to continue.

Muldoon wasn’t having it. “That’s the second time you’ve gone mute when your past is brought up.”

Still nothing. Her refusal to talk was disconcerting. She’d even stopped blinking.

“Three times and I have to give the you can talk to me about anything spiel, except you seem to do that anyway whether I want it or not.”

Nothing.

Trying to provoke her into saying something smart back hadn’t worked.

He tried again.

“Your shoulder injury and the Day of Which We Do Not Speak, are they connected?”

Lizzy managed a small yes.

Thank Christ for that.

“Well, it’s a start.”

“Sorry-“

“Leave it. Talk about something else now.”

”Talk more?” That brought her back around as she couldn’t resist smirking. “I thought I was annoying?”

“Better annoying than upset.”

It was true. Left to her own devices, she would chatter near-constantly but without expecting anyone to fill in the gaps. If you said nothing, it didn’t matter to her. She’d keep going regardless, without the very rare silences being uncomfortable. Then something else would catch her attention and she’d start seamlessly on the next anecdote.

Life had been quiet for far too long. She was sometimes - often - not a bad distraction. And seeing her struggle this much to get her words out was deeply concerning for him.

She looked offended. “Am not upset.” But Lizzy’s hand went to her shoulder unconsciously.

“Come on, woman. Do better.”

“Alright, fine! I actually need help tracking something down.”

“Tracking is something I’m good at.”

“I gave Call-Me-John-Dear a copy of my thesis when I got here. I asked María and she hasn’t seen it. I need my reference list-“

“I know where it is.”

Her face lit up. “Great! Where?”

“I may have borrowed it.”

”Oh…why?” The Lizzy of ten years prior would have freaked out at internationally renowned wildlife consultant Robert Muldoon reading her work someday.

”To prop up one side of my desk.” He responded dryly. “Elephants are my area of expertise too, you know.”

”Yeah, but…you had trouble sleeping, or-?” She couldn’t believe it. Lizzy was convinced not even her examiners had read her thesis front to back. It had taken Simon three days to get through it, and he practically read for a living.

Muldoon did have trouble sleeping, but her thesis wasn’t the solution for that particular problem.

”Your comments on trophy hunting were surprising. I imagine they caused a stir when you had to defend yourself.”

That section was near the end. He really had read it. Actually read it.

She shook her head in wonder. “Yeah, you’re right. I got in trouble in my viva. Did you like it?”

“It had its moments. But I don’t think much of that Blacklaw fellow you kept referencing-“

“Oh, give over.” Lizzy was beaming again, past life forgotten.

She wasn’t upset.

Not anymore.

***

Harding sighed and put his scalpel back down with finality on the surgical tray. It had taken two whole hours to get this far. Kathy had been required to gown up and join them in the operating theatre halfway through, her only task being to dab at the vet’s forehead with a square of gauze every few moments.

“Gerry...?” Tom eventually asked. “You okay, man?”

“I can’t find it...can’t find where the venom is located, not without turning this into a necropsy. I give up.” Harding grunted in frustration and reached for his suture kit.

Even under his mask Lizzy could see him smile grimly without a shred of his usual humour.

”Anybody volunteering to tell Hammond this was a waste of time?”

***

”Oh, Raymond.” Kathy pushed a chair towards the console the technician was parked solidly in front of. “What. A. Day.”

The dilophosaur was on its way back to the paddock on the back of a Jeep. Meanwhile, Lizzy and Tom had drawn the short straws. She’d left them still gowned up, clearing the room after the surgery, throwing bloody gauze into a biohazard bag and collecting strewn-about instruments to be sterilised. They seemed to be working pretty well together for a change, with only the occasional insult ringing through the air.

But Kathy didn’t want to hang around as the argument between Harding and Hammond kicked off, so she’d headed for the sanctuary of the control room to update the technician on current events.

“How you doing, Kitty-Kat?”

”Surgery was a failure. Hammond threw a fit.” Kathy scratched her head, still itching from the elastic on the surgical mask. “And Lizzy…-“

”What about her?”

”I don’t know, Ray!” Kathy threw her hands up. “She’s…distracted! She’s just being weird around Muldoon! Weirder than usual!”

”You finally noticed that, huh?”

When Kathy spoke again her tone was dry. “What do you mean finally? You already did and you didn’t tell me?”

“I ain’t stupid.” Arnold gestured at the wall of video monitors. “Or blind. I got a three-sixty. I see a lot of things.”

“So what happened? She get struck by lightning or something?”

“Negative. But how long do ya wanna bet before they finally get together?” Arnold asked her casually. “It’s gotta happen. If that woman wants something she usually gets it.”

Kathy snorted. “There’s still no way. Lizzy’s taken.” She pointed out the obvious, sighing.

“Shame, I think it would do both of them a world of good.” Arnold chuckled. “Finally break some of the tension around here.”

Kathy secretly agreed. She may as well scribble ‘Catnip for Game Wardens’ in big letters on Lizzy’s forehead, set her loose in the park and arm Muldoon with a giant butterfly net. Sporting event of the century.

“Never say never, I guess…” She murmured, thinking aloud. “It’s happened before.”

She was playing with the beads on her braids, zoning out looking at the weather systems working their way across the screens, and only realised she’d made a terrible mistake when out of the corner of her eye she saw Arnold turn, painfully slowly, to stare at her.

Oh, balls…

“What did you just say? Now hang on a second missy-“

“I mean- not Lizzy, like, it wouldn’t be the first time colleagues , y’know-“ She was floundering, and Arnold wasn’t fooled.

“Nuh-uh. Don’t give me that. You weren’t being vague.”

”Forget about it, Ray.” Gotta keep Lizzy’s secret. I promised. “It doesn’t matter.”

”Maybe it wouldn’t if it was unrequited.” Arnold muttered.

That got her attention.

“Oi! Has Muldoon said something?” Kathy asked suspiciously. “So he does like her? Like her, like her? I was right all along? What do you know?”

“That depends. What do you know?” Arnold fired back.

She shook her head. “I can’t tell you.”

“Well-“ Arnold folded his arms across the back of his head “-neither can I.”

They glanced sidelong at each other for a few agonising moments.

“Damn you, Ray!” Kathy eventually groaned. “Tell me.”

“Nuh-uh. Can’t have you backing out on me now, Miss Baker. You go first.”

Kathy weighed up the matter, rocking back and forth in her seat. “Between you and me, okay? I’m trusting you.”

“Sure. Cross my heart.” Arnold picked up his mug to take a sip.

“A few years ago, Lizzy had an affair.”

Coffee sprayed everywhere.

“Jesus!” Arnold stood up hurriedly and dabbed the nearest monitor with his tie. “Shit-“

”Sshhhh! You can’t tell anyone! Especially not Muldoon!”

Arnold barely spared her a glance as he answered, still desperately trying to mop up the spillage threatening InGen’s expensive technology.

“I’m serious!” Kathy went quiet, struck with an awful thought. “Wait, what if they already have, y’know…”

Arnold scoffed. “Yeah, like Liz is that good of an actress! The girl can’t lie to save herself.”

“Huh. I guess.” She saw his point. The ethologist was many things, but at least she was honest, usually involuntarily. “Alright, your turn!”

“Well, shit. Hoped you’d forgotten.”

“Not a chance. Please, share.” Kathy mimicked Arnold earlier, folding her arms behind her head.

“Watch it, girl. You remember Ed Regis’ first day?”

”That God-awful meeting? Sure.” Kathy groaned at the memory of being mistaken for a barista.

“Before you arrived Regis was looking at Liz like he wanted to eat her.”

”Oh, Hell.” Kathy shook her head. “Big mistake.” To do such a thing in front of the likes of Harding, even Gennaro was a no-no, but Regis had effectively signed a death warrant with that move.

“He hasn’t said a word to Regis since. Won’t even look at him. If our so-called PR expert fell into the T-rex paddock, I don’t think he’d hurry to save him.”

“Wow…like Ed would have a chance, Lizzy still really does love Simon.” Kathy insisted.

“Yeah, I know.” Arnold patted his pockets for his cigarettes. “But she ain’t happy with that New York lawyer, if she was desperate enough to see him again then she’d just leave. And she hates flying.”

“You’re right.” Kathy huffed. “I’ve heard them talking. Well, arguing. He makes her sound-“

“Different.” Arnold nodded. He’d noticed it too, Lizzy was always quiet for a long time after those phonecalls. “I get it.”

They listened to the warm hum of the machines around them before Kathy spoke again. “What was the boss like before Lizzy got here?”

“I dunno…He’s been through some shit of his own. Liz told me she made him laugh the other day. Yeah, right! Like I’d believe that, I ain’t coughing up ten dollars with no proof…”

“What is it about her?” Kathy wondered.

“She ain’t the one to be a neat little housewife. He’s into that, I guess.” Arnold snorted. “She’s way too much for me.”

“Too much for most. Especially Ed Regis, sports fan!” Kathy smiled. “World of good, huh?”

“Mark my words-“ Ray looked at her over the rim of his glasses. “As sure as Sibo’s gonna spew lava again one day. I can tell.”

“You willing to bet money on that one, Ray?”

”Stake my life. And-“ He pointed a finger at her. “- it’s gonna happen without either of us meddling. So no messing around. She needs to realise on her own. They both do.”

Kathy wondered if her Grandma would see ‘the gift’ in Ray too, or if he was just doing an awfully good job of bullshitting her.

“They both do? Uh, pretty sure Muldoon’s past the realising stage-“

”Not him. The kid who’s still expecting her to settle down and be his neat little housewife. Ten years, no luck, You think he’d get the hint by now-“

The phone next to him began to ring, and Arnold’s attention was immediately diverted to the flashing red light on his console.

“Huh…call from Sorna.” He muttered before picking up. “Y’allo, Isla Nublar control, go ahead?”

Crackling. Bad line. Or…someone breathing hard. A woman it sounded like, possibly in distress. Then a barely audible murmur. What in the Hell-?

”Ray? What’s wrong?” Kathy’s forehead was creased at the expression on his face.

He shook his head and motioned her to be quiet.

”Ma’am, I’m sorry but you’re going to have to speak up.” Arnold said firmly. “Is there a problem over on Sorna?”

Clutching her own handset, eighty-seven miles away, Lori Ruso blanked on what she was supposed to be saying. She had it all planned out, but nerves had overcome her at the sound of Arnold’s voice.

All she managed to croak out was:

”Please help me.”

***

Thanks for reading!

I guess this chapter and the last are more soap-opera-ish than even *I* expected. Very…people-y. I’ve loved it, Ray and Kathy together are just too much fun and I absolutely needed to put in that particular book reference with the dilo surgery but I’m keen to get back to the dinos after this, since baby raptors are causing yet more issues over on Sorna…those rascals.

#jurassic park oc #living dangerously #welcome to jurassic park #oc: dr lizzy armstrong #jurassic park female oc #jurassic park #jurassic park fanfiction #my writing #my fanfiction #robert muldoon #robert muldoon x female oc #jurassic park fanfic #ray arnold #john hammond #gerry harding #ed regis

[saimotass]

how i’d rewrite v3

warning: long post

chapter 1:

everything is essentially the same with one key difference

when voting ends, shuuichi is revealed to have abstained, leading to his death alongside kaede’s

thus resulting in a double protag switch, with kiibo becoming the protag

chapter 1 results in three deaths

this establishes the arc number, makes things interesting by killing off three of the seemingly most important characters, and gives leeway for the rest of the cast to shine

chapter 2:

the motive is the same, and maki gets hoshi’s tape

however, maki refuses to trade with him and he gets angry about it

because he’s always wanted to feel like he was worth something, and there’s someone standing in the way of letting him know if there’s anything outside waiting for him, he kills maki

however, after that, he watches his tape and realizes that he’s completely alone

he leaves the crime scene as is, and kokichi tries to throw the trial because he has maki’s tape and has revealed her as the SHSL assassin

kokichi attempts to make it be that maki committed suicide as a means of escaping her past, but he also posits that maybe she was framing hoshi since he was already a convicted murderer

hoshi, having nothing left to live for, confesses, and kokichi gets angry, citing that it would have been so much more interesting if he had fought his fate

maki and hoshi die in a fiercely antagonistic, ultimately self-destructive mess

chapter 3:

there’s a similar motive, and it’s established that there was a pair of relatives in the cast, but one of them is dead

miu has already cemented herself as being pretty isolated from the rest of the group, and people suspect that she and kaede were twins, based on them knowing that kaede had a twin sister

other guesses include rantarou being related to tenko or kirumi, and shuuichi being related to korekiyo or tsumugi

angie decides to hold a seance so that they can figure it out and reunite them

himiko offers to help and it’s during the seance that himiko is killed

this is a 1 victim chapter, subverting the expectation, and also making sense since 3 people died in chapter 1

during the trial, people start to suspect miu, but korekiyo starts acting weird

korekiyo has a meltdown completely out of nowhere, and believes himself to be possessed by the spirit of shuuichi

he reveals that shuuichi was his brother, and that he was vengeful towards the group for not stopping the killing game (making his, kaede’s, and rantarou’s sacrifices be in vain)

he also claims that shuuichi was trying to target the mastermind, but when himiko volunteered herself to help, he ended up killing her instead

korekiyo is voted, despite a couple people claiming that shuuichi would be the true culprit

korekiyo is executed, and in retaliation for monodam having killed monokid and monosuke during the prior executions, monotaro and monophanie kill him

chapter 4:

virtual reality is still part of the motive

angie has a breakdown, having lost the one person that was most receptive to her teachings about atua

miu and tsumugi are shown to be very close after the last few chapters due to their self-isolated nature

angie snaps and tries to kill miu, but tsumugi steps in in her place, killing angie as defense

the world glitches, and miu goes missing for a bit, leading people to believe that she was the victim

when they get out of the game, miu is still alive, and so people believe her to be the murderer

it’s revealed that miu caused the glitch in order to save tsumugi

kokichi’s been part of this too, having noticed how close they were and putting pieces together, as well as eavesdropping and coercing info out of miu

kokichi ouma, revealed as a magnificent bastard

miu begs everyone to vote for her, but tsumugi confesses, and she is executed

during tsumugi’s execution, monotaro seems like he’ll be next to die, but monophanie sacrifices herself for him, in line with this chapter’s theme

after this trial, miu and tenko start hanging out, having lost their closest friends (tsumugi and himiko respectively)

chapter 5:

everybody hates ouma: the musical

after it was revealed that he manipulated the events of both chapter 2 and chapter 4, literally everybody suspects him of being the mastermind, or at least a traitor of some sort

he decides to try and enlist miu to help hack into kiibo to make him a minion of his

miu goes along with it, thanks to some masterful manipulation tactics on ouma’s end (he’s good with words, the shit)

kiibo’s software goes blank for a bit, but he eventually gets better thanks to an unforeseen software update

(during the time that kiibo’s offline, we play briefly as the other cast, who are all either preparing to confront or already confronting ouma by this point)

ouma is also shown to be causing injuries to himself, hoping to die by his own hand and cause a trial where nobody knows the real killer, taking everyone with him because they’re all so bad at playing the game

ouma is the victim and nobody knows who killed him, not even monokuma

everyone is hesitant to admit that they confronted him, but only gonta, kaito, and tenko confess to having fought him physically

miu and kiibo work together to reveal that kiibo was still recording during the time he was offline, and they show ouma inflicting injuries to himself

everyone believes that ouma committed suicide, but just before everyone goes to vote, gonta confesses

gonta delivered the killing blow accidentally, not realizing his own strength

over the course of the game, gonta and kiibo had gotten close, and gonta got so angry seeing kiibo malfunctioning that he killed ouma on accident

tenko and kaito both then claim that they killed him, not wanting gonta to die

kiibo has to convince them that voting for gonta is the right thing to do

gonta is executed, and it seems like monotaro is safe, but right at the end of gonta’s execution, monotaro commits suicide

chapter 6:

after talking to monokuma during the previous trial about rules and what to do if the results of a trial were unclear or ambiguous, they realize that the mastermind broke a rule back in chapter 1

the rule being that someone killing more than 2 people isn’t allowed

when kiibo’s attempting to find out who the mastermind could be alongside kirumi, miu, tenko, and kaito, they are given class files for each student

nowhere in either korekiyo or shuuichi’s files do they mention a brother, while in kaede’s, her twin sister is mentioned

after gathering evidence and demanding a retrial of the first case, kiibo confronts monokuma, believing that korekiyo is the mastermind, having hidden his death after causing the deaths of kaede, rantarou, shuuichi, and himiko

it’s revealed that shuuichi was actually the one faking his death, and that he is the mastermind of the killing game

danganronpa is still a show, but shuuichi passes it off as an experimental documentary on how people can be forced to kill, based on a real life set of video games

he confesses that he fabricated his relation to korekiyo, but that it worked well, as korekiyo was a traitor, having worked with shuuichi on his experiment

he also reveals that kiibo was made solely for the experiment, as a camera and an audience surrogate, making him essentially a conduit for amateur sleuths to solve real life murders on TV

this breaks kiibo and we play as the other four survivors to help him

it’s revealed that the show technically hasn’t even aired, and that shuuichi was planning on killing all of them in order to survive to share his findings with the world

shuuichi is thwarted, and the survivors all agree to die alongside him if it means destroying the video

kiibo initiates self-destruct, but after seeing that the others are safe in a bunker, accepts his death and kills himself alongside shuuichi

epilogue:

the survivors are kaito, tenko, miu, and kirumi, subverting the theme number of 3

it’s revealed that rantarou had memories of surviving two other experiments led by shuuichi, explaining the v3 -- this was the 3rd version of his game

the footage is destroyed, and the four survivors walk away from the rubble, unsure of how to assimilate back into society having pretended that nothing happened

#v3 #danganronpa v3 #new danganronpa v3 #ndrv3 #v3 rewrite #ndrv3 rewrite #danganronpa #dr #saimotalks #saimotass.exe #spoilers #v3 spoilers #ndrv3 spoilers #dr spoilers #danganronpa spoilers #new danganronpa v3 spoilers #long post #let me know if this is any good lmao

[electricprincess96]

"Edelgard hate really is the weird fandom lightning rod for lesbophobia misogyny and anticommunism (or maybe just like, anti-revolution sentiments period? Tho I mean red and gold lmao) and it sucks" Take I just saw over Edelgard being made a legendary hero and people being annoyed with it because this is her third variation with a fourth one on the way in like two or three months.

"Rhea hate really is a lightning rode for lesbianophobia, misogyny and anti-religious bigotry"

They don't like it when you point out their flaws by comparing Edelgard to Rhea like this.

A few things 1. Edelgard is bisexual, not a lesbian, folks need to stop erasing part of her sexuality like that, besides Byleth most of her female endings are platonic for fuck sake 🤦🏻‍♀️

2. Just cause you dislike a female character doesn't make you a misogynist, modern wave feminists and fandom feminists have absolutely ruined that word to the point it is basically meaningless now.

3. Being anti communism is a good thing.... Like Communism has a higher body count than Nazism for fuck sake. But also Edelgard is not a communist, her ideology doesn't match with that. Now any political ideology that results in total control being bestowed upon one person (ie. The Emperor) and involves hostile take over of neighboring countries (Leicester and Fearghus) and you know turning a blind eye to human experimentation (Slitherers) and involves the active attempt at wiping out an already minority race (Nabateans) because you think they secretly are behind every bad thing in the world even though they didn't have anything to do with your childhood trauma shit like that is a bad thing. Bad, BAD thing.

Also I really don't give a shit that Edelgard got a Legendary Variant, I'm annoyed because as you pointed out not everyone from 3H is even in the game and yet in a few months time (maybe even before 3H is 1 year old yet) we will have FOUR Edelgard's... At least they spread the Camilla's out a bit more. Like Dorothea isn't even in the game yet, no Ingrid, no Sylvain or Felix or Dedue or Rhea or Seteth or Flayn or Manuela etc. Male or Female Byleth doesn't even have an alt yet but Edelgard's already got 2 with a 3rd on its way. Sure she absolutely smoked it with the CYH banner, but did they not notice ALL of those other units in the Top 20 that aren't even in the game yet? Like I'm not gonna tell people not to be excited cause I enjoyed every Camilla they gave me, but I will grumble a bit about the fact they aren't even spreading out her alts, cause if they did that I wouldn't mind as much.

#princess answers asks #anon #edel discourse #lady baea

[maljean89]

Do you have a band whose entire discography brings you back to the different chapters of your life? Its very basic-bitch-white-girl of me, but Paramore is that band for me.

RIOT! (2007) — The end of high school I discovered Paramore when I was a senior in high school. I caught this promo at the end of some reality TV show on MTV of Hayley singing “Misery Business.” I actually found the video on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GSsDEkbBhZo (about 1:40 in). I was hooked from then on out. A friend of mine burned a CD for me that had “Misery Business” and “That’s What You Get” along with “My Heart” from their first album. When I close my eyes I can see driving through my small town in my black Chevy Blazer with the windows down and the music cranked.

BRAND NEW EYES (2009) — UW Oshkosh This album was the soundtrack of my college years. This album brings me back to mostly bad memories. Memories of a time when I was repressed and not exploring myself the way I should have been. I listened to “The Only Exception” and thought it was made for me and him. I look back and “Playing God” was more accurate. I did create a kickass long-form radio piece reviewing this album that turned out really really great. I was really proud of it — here’s the link: https://vimeo.com/18520889. When I close my eyes I can see the campus, the radio station WRST, that apartment where we had so many fights. I guess you could say this album got me through it, while at the same time DJ’ed the whole shit-tastic experience.

THE FINAL RIOT! (2008) — A metaphor for what I wanted my relationship to be Even though this album came out prior to Brand New Eyes, I didn’t personally own it until after. I got it as a gift from my ex-husband — the same fuck I was dating in college. I loved it. I still have it. Most of my CDs were quickly separated from their cases, never to be reunited again. Not this CD (and DVD). Always stayed in its case, and always lived on the bookshelf. I treated it like a collectors item — something to be displayed. Oddly enough, I treated my then-new marriage the same way. On the outside, to the rest of the world — we were happy. I was happy with my choices. If I just told myself one more time, if I just posted one more picture, if I just put it up on that shelf to display it to everyone... maybe I’d believe that I actually wanted it. To be clear — I love the CD, just not the person who gave it to me and the time period during which I displayed it. Transported back to a time when I dreamed of getting away and being someone in the crowd of this concert — faceless, nameless, and singing along in unison with strangers. 

PARAMORE (2013) — The shitshow that was my marriage

When the first single from this album came out, I hated it. “Now” is still one of my least favorite songs on the album. I remember feeling sad and betrayed that this band that I loved, that I held so close to my heart, made something I didn’t recognize. What could I trust in this world if I couldn’t trust Paramore? I close my eyes and I’m in the grey Ford Escape we bought with the money my dad gave me to pay for my college. The car he would end up taking in the divorce. I’m transported back to countless nights of being kicked out of my own apartment. I grew to love this album. Again, I thought songs like “Still into You” and “Ain’t It Fun” applied to my love-life and newfound adulthood as I convinced myself that I was happy, that I liked my life and my choices. But songs like “Last Hope” and “Part II” bring me back to how melancholy I felt. How trapped. How lost. I don’t even know myself at all, I thought I would be happy by now. Words could have never been more true at that point in my life.

AFTER LAUGHTER (2017) — On the other side I waited 4 years for another Paramore record. And in 4 years, my life changed. A LOT. I left that piece of shit that held me down, held me back. My mom got cancer and I watched her wither away for a year and held her hand as she died. I met the love of my life. This album came out right before I went on the road with him — went on tour with him an we drove across the entire country, blasting this record. Jonah was very sick of it by the time we hit California, but he had no say in it if he wanted me to do the driving! From the East Coast to Canada, through the midwest, down the West Coast, and down through Arizona, New Mexico, Texas and last stop, Georgia. I fell in love with these songs and how this band had aged and grown up and gone through depression, just like I had. We all went through “Hard Times” and gave people fake smiles. While widely departed from their pop-punk beginnings, this album feels synthy and dripping with eighties energy — as do the music videos. Paramore wasn’t afraid to change with this album and I felt like I wasn’t afraid to change too.

One song sticks out like a sore thumb and makes me cry every time I listen to it. I was 26 when I left him, when I left that shitty life I wasted behind me. Everything was fine until you came around. Until he ruined everything, I had my close relationship with my mom, I had a sense of who I was. You got me tied up but I stay close to the window. He wouldn’t let me have friends or have a life that didn’t include him. I literally can remember daydreaming, gazing out that front window of our apartment at Lake Superior, wishing I could hop on one of those huge ships and just get the fuck out of here, get a new life. The part that really gets me is this:

Reality will break your heart Survival will not be the hardest part It's keeping all your hopes alive All the rest of you has died So let it break your heart

“26″ is literally a song about hope, but I feel like it was written just for me. Getting out from underneath the thumb of an emotionally abusive partner — missing out on years of valuable time with my mother only to reunite and watch her die — finding hope in the face of Jonah and finally feeling free to be myself, to explore, to grieve, to love, and to live.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I grew up and went through lots of shit as I listen to these albums. I got to feel a band grow and mature as I grew and matured. There have been artists in my lifetime that I fell in love with at a meaningful point in my life, but they didn’t keep growing as I grew. Artists (sadly) like Avril, who showed me at 13 that it was okay to be different than the preppy girls, who gave me hope with her 2nd album that I was going to grow as she grew, but who then disappointed me beyond repair with her 3rd album when she took a hard left turn into sassy, stupid, blonde vapidity. But then came Paramore — a band with a sound that matched my teenage spirit, and I was whisked away into my young adulthood. I’m 31 now and Hayley only just released her first solo album this year and I’m still growing and changing with this artist. She stepped away from Paramore (for good? We do not know.) and put out this indie-sounding experimental album that feels like 80′s pop mixed with Sia’s 2005 record “Colour The Small One” — a high school fave of mine. As a fan, it gives me hope when someone like Hayley Williams doesn’t allow herself to be trapped in a box. She doesn’t have to be a pop-punk, flame-haired front woman forever. She can change. I can change. Paramore can grow, and so can I.

Let’s keep changing and growing for the rest of our lives, shall we?

#paramore #hayley williams #music #pop-punk #pop #pop music

[shuttershocky]

Why you should watch Canaan

Alright friends it’s time to bring out the cursed content. Here’s a big post about why you should watch Canaan, an anime based off an extra scenario in the visual novel 428 Shibuya Scramble, conceptualized by none other than the most infamous duo of Kinoko Nasu and Takashi Takeuchi.

What’s it about?

Canaan is a goofy action movie in a 13 episode format about a Middle Eastern mercenary / super-spy with magic eyes called Canaan and her quest to take down her adopted elder sister Alphard Al Sheya, the leader of a bioterrorist organization called Snake, all while keeping her Japanese photographer girlfriend Maria Osawa safe from the crossfire.

The Main Cast

Canaan

Shiki Ryougi BUT WITH A GUN

No really she’s got some magic synesthesia that gives her Mystic Eyes abilities

She can see feelings and emotions as colors, which basically lets her wallhack by seeing enemies through walls and quickly discern between enemies and civilians.

Gun-fu specialist

Deeply empathetic to others but has difficulty expressing herself

Wants to live a normal and happier life but is consumed by vengeance

Sees herself as a gun instead of a person; no real sense of self

Entertains herself with string like a cat

GAY

FUCK GRAVITY

Alphard

Voiced by Maaya Sakamoto doing her Shiki voice so she’s also Shiki, WITH A GUN

Actual Resident Evil villain down to her terrorist plot making use of a sci-fi virus

Extremely hammy and makes little sense.

Even more skilled at gun-fu than Canaan.

Cold sociopath who literally shot her own adoptive father in cold blood

Can literally beat a truck full of men with both arms tied behind her back

O O F

Maria Osawa

GAY 

Fearless journalist, a photographer out to prove herself.

GAY

Precious pure cinnamon roll

GAY

Canaan’s damsel in distress and the only one who sees Canaan for the person she is

GAY

Her reporter partner treats her like a kid but respects her idealism and instinct

GAY

Poorly hidden Jeanne D’arc recolor, thanks Takeuchi

GAY

Don’t be fooled you can tell these are Nasu characters when half of their scenes are fucking eating

The Romance

“Ok Shutters you talked up the romance a lot this shit better be good”

Allow me to present the following points for why Canaan and Maria are worth your time

1/3rd of Canaan is made up of their dates. 

They go out for ice cream, see the stars, hold hands, affirm that they are the single most important person to each other in the world. Happens like every two-three episodes.

It’s not fanservice. 

Make no mistake this is a Nasu and Takeuchi work: you’re getting your fanservice, just not from these two. Their interactions are very pure, focusing a lot more on the emotion of the moment than any male-gazey camera work. I’m gonna tell you now though, they don’t kiss at the end. (BOOOOO)

Their relationship is the story’s main priority

Canaan’s story is dumb as fuck, having a hilariously bad understanding of biological concepts and going about its twists and turns with all the subtlety and care of an 80′s action movie. Where it does put the effort in is portraying how important Canaan and Maria are to each other, spending a lot of time that could have been used to make a more cohesive plot to instead further flesh out their relationship. You learn how they first met, exactly how different they are in terms of their backgrounds, their personalities, and their ideologies, as well as how they build each other up to be better people.

Shit to watch out for

Like all things that spring from the mind of the Mushroom Man, this show is obviously not without its caveats. Some of these include:

The crazy (possibly incestuous) imouto

Yes Nasu’s worst trope is back in this one. A woman claiming to be Alphard’s biological younger sister appears as a villain who is crazy obsessed with getting her love and approval. She becomes increasingly deranged as the series progresses, and her downfall is a genuinely disturbing thing to see.

Shit gets violent

There is blood everywhere. Bullets, knives, grenades, gas, superpowers, an experimental virus and live wires go flying in every episode. Canaan does not fuck around; she has absolutely no qualms with plugging a man full of bullets should they endanger herself, civilians, or especially Maria. It’s a marked departure from Nasu’s usual protagonists, all who dislike or at least refrain from killing until it’s the only possible option.

Body Horror

Plenty of Canaan’s enemies are superpowered humans who have made themselves bioweapons in order to gain various powers. Some of these powers manifest as light body horror. While I don’t think there’s anything one can classify as extremely nauseating, try not to think about your popcorn while watching. It’s better that way.

Other things you may like to know

The dub is good

If dubs are your thing then Canaan’s got you covered. I can personally confirm that the English dub is excellently done and while you may miss out on some fantastic voice acting from the JP cast, the English cast puts in a few great performances themselves. Especially Maria’s partner, his English VA is hilarious.

Great action scenes

Canaan is adept at fighting in any situation whatsoever, whether that be on the roof of a truck, on top of a train, or inside an underground sci-fi bunker being assaulted by mindblowing (literally) soundwaves. The fights are all really well animated, and there’s even a noticeably distinct fighting style between Canaan and Alphard despite having had the same training, which really helps establish their different personalities.

Jouji Nakata plays a crazy fucking taxi driver who drives on anything but the road all the while singing along to his favorite idols.

YOROKOBE, CANAAN

No seriously

I probably should have led with this

See it for yourself

Now do yourself a favor and watch Canaan. It’s dumb. It’s fun. It’s a good, gay time and your best look at what the Type-Moon duo can do when asked to make an action movie. If you love Type-Moon’s balance of Unlimited Bullshit Works with Endearing and Well-Written Character Relationships, you’ll have a grand old time.

And if for some reason you’re following me and seeing this post despite not being a Nasu fan, see it anyway! It takes place outside his literary universe and does things just differently enough that it just might be your cup of tea. 

#Canaan #Canaan anime #Kinoko Nasu #Type-Moon #(but not really) #Please watch it I'm so alone

[snarflebiscuit2]

Homeless Winter Wonderland In Indiana... Thanks Ditech... Destroyer of Worlds...⚔️🔥☠️ (#2)

(con't)...

So after some smalltalk and a lil catching up, came the serious talk and decisions. Mom basically ended up making most of the decisions herself by bouncing a few things off of me & her sisters. They stayed for a few days and I was finally able to get down there while they were at the hospital so I could see them before the had to leave the state.

The decisions ended up being that she would leave as naturally as possible while trying to also remain as comfortable as possible. That means a DNR. But also allows her food & drink as long as she was able to take it herself, not thru forced methods or tubes. This also went for any medications. Basically she chose to go "naturally" and when it was her time, not to try to bring her back or any of that mess. She just wanted them to let her go & get it over with. I think as much as she wanted to stay and make sure I would be ok, she was just tired & wanted to "go home". 

Given her plateau status, the hospital told her she would have to choose somewhere to go, a longer term facility, because they needed the rooms & they really couldn't do much more for her. Plus it would be much cheaper and less of a "cold" environment for her. So she chose a Hospice. The home was called Abbie Bryce Hunt House, and her hospice team was from Premier Hospice. They were a great team & the home was also nice.

It was a large home, 2 levels. It looked like a large, wealthy family's home basically. They had everything on site. Kitchens, events, phones, gardens, movie nights, all that kinda stuff. Plus the hospice team came in frequently to check on & take care of mom's needs & to evaluate her to see where she was & how she was progressing. 

Actually, she progressed very quickly after she was released from the hospital. I later realized why. When you leave hospital care and transition into hospice care, hospice doesn't renew most of the meds the hospital may have you on. They focus only on the "comfort meds". The things that help to keep you as comfy as possible, such as Morphine & Xanax. They no longer focus on preventive or maintenance meds. There's simply no point. People who are accepted in hospice are those who have a diagnosis with 6 months or less to live, generally. Many have chosen to no longer pursue alternatives treatments it experimental proceedures, etc. For lack of a better way to put it, they've basically ""given up" & want to just go quickly & quietly while trying to remain comfortable. I can't say I blame them though. 😕

So, after she got to the home, they continued & even increased her Morphine supply & started on Ativan to help with anxiety & also sleep. But other than that, there wasn't much in the way of meds or actual treatments. I visited as often as I could but I haven't had a car since my divorce and thus no way to travel aside from Uber, taxi or a friend IF I could manage to run one down, get in thier schedule & throw gas money at them too. Needless to say, Uber was my main transportation.

After about 2 weeks or so in the home we had went to go visit her on a Saturday and when we arrived she was gone. I asked where the hell she was because everyone knew we were coming. Oddly, noone seemed to know where she was. After several calls and a lot if profanity, I found out she had apparently fallen while trying to get from her bed to her portable toilet beside her bed, & they callef 911 to take her to the closest ER via ambulance. So we ran down the location and off we went.

Upon arrival, we hunted her down and spoke to her. It was at this point that I realized how badly her mind had begun to deteriorate. When I asked her what had happened, she told me she had fell while trying to turn around and sit on the toilet from her bed. Short & simply, logical explanation. But between me & several others asking her the same question, after answering a few times the story begN to change and then began to get really weird... 😕😥

By the end of the night, while speaking to her hospice nurse who had came with her to the hospital, I got a chance to hear the version she had told her versus what she had told me earlier in the evening. Basically, she told her that she had fallen...from the 4th floor...and landed and fell through the floorboards up to her knees when she landed.🤔😳😐  Uuhhhh... 

1st, the house had only 2 floors. 2nd, it had a concrete slab, no wooden floors to fall through & no basement. 3rd, if she had fallen that far she damn sure wouldn't be in as good of shape as she was... You get the idea. The whole story was just looney. Then it quickly bled over into many other areas after that episode. And within another few days days, I got the call at about 7:20am from her social worker if all people, that she had passed shortly before they had come in to check on her that morning & give her her Morphine.

Everyone seemed to be rushing to try to find a way to get me to the home asap as I was texting & calling everyone to let them know she was gone.i was in shock and wasn't particularly concerned about rushing over to "see her body" before anyone moved her & before they called anyone to come take her to the coroner's office. I just didn't have an overwhelming urge to see her dead and cold stuff. I mean it was just her body, a container. My mom wasn't there anymore. She was gone. 😥

One if her sisters seemed very adamant that I should get there and see her before they moved her or took her away. She said I would end up regretting it for the rest of my life if I didn't. I tried to explain, but I have up. She wasn't listening. But she did wire me $500 so I'd have some money to be able to get around and take care of a few things that I was going to need to do pretty quickly. That was really sweet of her.💚

Then she asked me what we were gonna do with her body. I said she wanted to be cremated. She asked if I knew any places that were affordable & nice. She said mom's nurse had recommended a place called Neptune Society. I said it sounded familiar but I honestly had no clue and that I couldn't pay for anything regardless so it really didn't matter. Then she told me she was going to pay for it. I was surprised, but grateful.

So we chose them and they came to retrieve her body.after the paperwork & everything involved, things were in a state if... Peaceful chaos, is the only way I can think to describe it I guess. It was prolly the shock, idk... 

Fast forward some and my ended up paying for mom's cremation, and my ex-wife of all people ended up buying mom a nice urn. The super generic, black plastic one that comes with the basic package my aunt bought was really hideous and cheap.i mean BAD. I guess even my ex (who did not get along with mom), Couldn't stand the idea (& prolly even just the sight), if that hideous plastic mini "garbage can" they were gonna send her home in. Yea, it was THAT BAD. 😕. Actually, I couldn't believe it when she said she was gonna get her a decent urn and to pick one ouy., That she'd just put it on her credit card. 😲

I was really blown away, & also very grateful! 💚 I only wanted 1 thing but it would figure that it was too expensive & noone could afford it, least if all me. Smfh... It was a ring they offered that had the fingerprint of your loved one and it came in either yellow gold, white gold or silver. But even the cheapest one, the silver, was about $780. That just seemed excessively ridiculous to me and everyone else too! Talk about taking advantage of someone while they're grieving and down! DAMN! 🤬. Needless to say, everyone was shitty and I was at the top of that list for sure. Not because I couldn't get it so much as that they would charge so much and take advantage of people in that situation they way they were. At least they offered to go ahead and take casts of her prints and put them in her file so they were there if I found I could afford it at a later date. That was cool at least.

Donut took about 2.5 weeks to get her taken care of and back in town & ready to be picked up to come home. Then it took another week & a half to get a damn ride up there to pick her up. 😕  So I got her home finally and set up in a spot if prepared for her. Then, slowly, my world began to implode and shit started falling apart faster & faster... 

[thenixkat]

Thoughts on the cartoon Static Shock

So these notes n’ stuff was part of my 4th? rewatch of the series. I’d watched it once to actually finished the show since I never caught all the eps when it was airing on tv, another time when I was on a Static Shock kick, and the 3rd time streaming it with friends to see what they thought of it. Each time I picked up on more stuff like character and events, but this time I gave it an actual serious watch to get details, timeline, and a solid handle on characterization and abilities, and plots that I can work on for my fanfic. And taking off the nostalgia goggles and giving it a real hard critical look?

It’s not great.

It’s about average like it still makes it to my top ten superhero shows but its like probably number 7 on that list. It is still absolutely my favorite show in the DCAU; but ya gotta take into account that I don’t like Superman, I hate Justice League b/c it’s very much a drama and its ep should have just been released as hour-long things, I refuse to watch Batman Beyond, and I prefer The Batman over Batman The Animated Series. What I’m saying is literally the only other thing in the DCAU that I’ve watched and liked was Justice League Unlimited and even that I have issues with. 

If I’m ranking DC shows that I like I’d go:

1. Teen Titans

2. Black Lightning

3. Static Shock

4. Legion of Super-Heros

5. The Batman

6. Justice League Unlimited

So what do I like about Static Shock?

Black people. Like, holy fuck there’s so many Black people in this show. With different skin tones, hairstyles, eye colors, body types. Got em as good guys, bad guys, and neutral parties. Got a Black girl as the protag’s main love interest. Introduced a slew of original Black heroes and villains to the pasty as fuck DCAU, even if the rest of that universe likes to forget that Static Shock takes place in it. 

Just, I love dorky science types like Virgil and Richie? Also, I like their friendship very much. That is some good shit right there even if I hate the ship and thus don’t interact with most of the fandom b/c of it. And paying close attention to it added a lot more complexity and depth to the characters than I’d known was there.

Also, I don’t normally like female characters, but Shebang is good. I like her very much and I will not forgive the writers for “She-Back!”. Also, Sharon is a boss. Daisy is the best girlfriend and could literally do so much better than Virgil, that boy is blessed to have her.

And I do like to see superhero noobs who have no fucking clue what they're doing and keep trying their best. And I like more stuff where like the hero does more than just fight people? And has a life outside of heroing?

The show is also just, genuinely entertaining to me? Like both as an adult and as a kid its fun to watch. It's something that younger me tried to catch on tv.

My problems with the show?

This show does not do right by its female characters. Frieda drops from the face of the earth for long stretches of time when by all rights she should appear at least as often as Daisy. The show forgets that Frieda and the main boys are very close friends. The main girls are never brought in on the loop as well as their intelligence gets completely underfunded that they don’t figure out the loop exists in the first place. Others like Trina and Shenice just fucking vanish, much like Frieda, even when they shouldn’t. Sharon spent an episode being blatently ooc. Also, Virgil’s mom literally got fridged for drama and male character development. And doing a bit of reserch it also fucked up a femal character from a different show and then killed her off in a brutal graphic manner.

There are plenty of spots where the writing is either noticibly lazy or outright incompetent. Especially in the aformentioned area in handling characters. Other times there’s the plot of an ep being pushed in a direction that doesn’t make sense given what we’re being shown, or don’t make sense going by just... fucking basic ass phsiscs, or doesn’t make sense b/c it contradicts things we’ve previously been shown.

Speaking of that! The lack of continuity very much hurts the show. Characters at the very least should learn from previous experiences. Past events should effect the present and the future.

Also, I’m not sure what’s at fult for it, either the Y7 rating or the writers’ lack of nads, but the show ignoring many many deaths and how they’d logicly effect characters also robbed it of some of what it could have been. For the same reason is probably why the gang and coruption of city officials and such dropped from the show so quickly. Its possible that I would have not noticed this as much if I never watched Black Lightning (which is fucking good btw) and seen it done right.

And as a show for kids some of the episode have fucking gods aweful messages or undertones. I will not forgive the use of the ‘what measure is a nonhuman’ trope in “Toys In The Hood”. Nor will I forgive the narritive fucking around with characters and their relationships to punish Shenice for being a confidant Black girl in “She-Back!”. And I don’t know who the fuck thought that telling kids that people who break the law don’t deserve human rights and its ok to use them is human guinea pigs was ok in “Wet N’ Wild”. And did no one stop to think that maybe they shouldn’t portay a dude poisoning the community of an in-universe predominantly Black comminity with largly untested and potentially dangerous experimental chemicals on the reasoning that “most of them are thugs” as a good guy. Idk, someone shoulda stopped and thought a little bit about that in the entire time it took the ep to get made. WHAT THE FUCK WRITERS.

What I would change?

-Have Frieda and Daisy in on the loop. Frieda either figures it out or is told in the 2nd ep and Daisy figures it out in her debute ep. Sharon figure it out durring ‘Brother-Sister Act’ and she isn’t written wildly out of character. Have the 3 of them become superheros, expand the fucking team.

-Remember that Shenice and Trina fucking exist? 

-Remember that all of the other villians that nly show up in 1 ep still exist and would likely be able to escape from prison about as easily as the onse that do get to make multible apperences.

-Remember that BacPac isn’t a backpack and can act with his own agency.

-Scrap 90% of ‘Toys In The Hood’.

-Have characters actually effected by people they knew dying in the Big Bang? I. E. Hotstreak’s entire posse never showed up again and he should feel some fucking way about that. Virgil and Wade had known eachother for years.

-Do something with the fact that Brainiac did fucky shit to Richie that should have lasting and possibly traumatic concequences. Also all of the nanites, where are they?

-Have Dr. Todd be a villian and the heros and villians working together to stop his plot b/c holy shit its unethical.

-Just... so many things. Little improvements.

#nix meows #static shock #nix thinks dc

[fandomsandfeminism]

Rick Riordan's books just keep getting better (and more diverse!) Transcript

Part 1

Part 2

Transcript Below the Cut:

Rick Riordan. So, I've wanted to make a video about Rick Riordan for a while and with  The new Trials of Apollo book just coming out, I’m really hyped about it. So I wanted to talk about why I like his books, or at least some of the things that impress me about them and keep me consistently excited about them.

Rick Riordan, if you don’t know,  is the author of the wildly popular Percy Jackson series, and today I want to talk about his books, especially how his representation of minorities has improved over time.

So, a few quick things: First, I’m not going to talk about ALL of Rick Riordan’s work, especially his ancillary and tie in material like the Demi-God Files or all the cross over stories, mostly because I haven't read all of them.

And second: Spoilers. Just, big old spoilers for basically everything. I’m not going to go into big plot points much, but I will be talking about some of the characters in depth. I’m going to move through his ouvre in roughly chronological order. So, you are warned.

Lastly, this video hinges on the premise that well done, well executed, fully fledged representations of minority characters in children and Young Adult media is good and important.  I’m not really going to argue this point. It is the assumption we are beginning with. Diverse media with diverse characters is  good and important.  

And this point is, weirdly, kind of controversial. In fact, in the vast majority of children and young adult media most of the cast will be white, straight, cis, able bodied, neurotypical children or young adults with an unstated or vague religious affiliation. This last bit, about the unstated or vague religious affiliation is one we don’t often think about, but really, having a character with ANY stated religion is really rare. Most will, maybe, practice a sort of secularized Christmas maybe? But that’s about it.

The rationale you’ll hear for this is that this makes books more accessible and thus marketable. I would counter that if you really want your book to appeal to as many different people as possible, wouldn’t you want to have as many different types of characters as possible? But that comes with the assumption that outright bigots wouldn’t refuse a book because one of the secondary characters is in a wheelchair, I guess.

So, yeah. Most children's lit and young adult lit  will be white, straight, cis, able bodied, neurotypical children or young adults with an unstated or vague religious affiliation, even if it gets absurdly, massively popular. Popular enough to take risks and work outside the box. I’m looking at you, JK Rowling. Looking at you.

This fact, this lack of diversity, does not bother some people. And we are not going to argue this point in this video. We are beginning with the assertion that this situation is not ideal, and that added quality, well written diversity is a positive. And we are going to look specifically at how Rick Riordan improves in this specific aspect of his writing over time.

--

Ok, so, Uncle Rick is a San Antonio , Texas native, and as someone who was also born and raised in central Texas, I love this fact. He went to MY alma mater, UT, and became a middle school teacher. We’re basically the same person.

Now, Percy Jackson isn’t actually his first book series. In the 90s he wrote a detective series set in San Antonio called Big Red Tequila. There’s like 7 books in this series and I have read none of them. I’m sure they’re great though. How could they not be with a name like that?

Our story really begins in 2004-ish. The story goes that he was telling his son Greek myths as bedtime stories, and when he ran out of myths (or at least child friendly myths I assume), he started to make one up. He invented a story about a boy named Percy, a son of Poseidon, who goes on an adventure to return Zeus's missing lightning bolts.  His son told him that he should turn it into a book, his dad had published books before after all. So, Rick did just that. He then took his rough draft to his middle school students and used their feedback to revise.

He then sold this book to Miramax Books for enough money to retire from teaching and focus on writing. God damn. Rick was living the dream here. Life goals.

So, yeah. If you’ve never read the first Percy Jackson books they are...fine. They’re ok, good even. Definitely like, children’s books. But if you like bad puns and greek myths they are fun. I read all 5 in like...one weekend when I was in high school. I personally think the books really pick up in the third one: Titan’s Curse, mostly because we meet my favorite character, Nico. There’s some good world building in that book, and it really feels like Rick had figured out how he wanted to end the series by that point, so the plot feels more focused.  Maybe that’s just me.

So, remember how I said that Children’s lit will tend to be filled with white, straight, cis, able bodied, neurotypical children with an unstated or vague religious affiliation? Well, Percy Jackson and all his friends are...mostly, white, straight, cis, able bodied, children with an unstated or vague religious affiliation who have ADHD and Dyslexia.

Because Rick Riordan’s son has ADHD and Dyslexia, and Rick wanted these heroes to be like him. So, yeah. The diversity isn’t AMAZING here, but the intent to provide representation for minority children was present from the very beginning. And ADHD and Dyslexia are, like, super powers here, proof the children are demi-gods, are side effects of their brains and bodies being ready for amazing quests.  And there’s this great diversity in the characters with ADHD and Dyslexia and how it impacts them. Annabeth is depicted as super smart and studious. You have Percy who has always struggled in school. And so on.

Now, how you feel about this representation of ADHD and Dyslexia will vary. Some people really like it, others think it isn’t very well done or plays into some iffy tropes. I think we can safely say that the intent was very positive, but your milage may vary on the execution.

There’s also a movie adaption of the first 2 books which are…..bad. Logan Lerman was 18 when he played Percy- who should be like...12? And they made Hades the bad guy? And like..Persephone? Is? In? The? Underworld? In? Summer? Which….ugh. Like, they made Grover black, which was a cool choice, an attempt to address the lack of racial diversity it seems.  but still these movies are not good….maybe if you haven't read the books, you’ll like them. I don’t like them. I didn't even watch the second one honestly. .

Alright so we will look at the rest of Rick Riordan’s books in part 2 of this video. I wanted to cut it here to keep it from getting super super long. So I will see you guys over on Part 2 to finish up

CUT --

Welcome back to my look at all of Rick Riordan’s books and how they have improved over time. We are going to jump right in where we left off at the end of Percy Jackson and the Olympians.

Ok, so after Percy Jackson, Rick Riordan started work on the Kane Chronicles. If you haven’t read the Kane Chronicles, I don’t blame you. They are kind of the forgotten half-siblings of the Percy Jackson universe, but you should read them. They are really good, and they feel like a really experimental time for Rick. Not only is this the first time we see him play with a split First Person narrator, where different chapters are from different character’s Point of View, but he also really tackles race in these books.

Carter and Sadie are biracial, and deal with all kinds of race issues- Sadie being white passing and Carter not, the books looks at  how that impacts them and their experiences with others, their family, and their heritage. Plus all the Egyptian shit is really cool.

But even if you skipped this book series (seriously, go back and read them.) you can see this evolution in Rick’s writing in his sequel to Percy Jackson- Heroes of Olympus. These books actually came out at the same time as the Kane Chronicles, with The first Kane Chronicles book coming out in May 2010, then The first Heroes of Olympus book coming out in October 2010, and back and forth. And it’s clear that his new skills in Red Pyramid were influential on Heroes of Olympus.

Not only do we see the return of the Shifting narrator, now a Third Person Limited Point of View that follows different characters in different chapters, but where the first series was overwhelmingly white, these books seem to make a real effort to avoid that. The first two books- The Lost Hero and Son of Neptune take place, more or less concurrent and independent of each other. It’s not until the 3rd book when all the new characters meet up. But in those first 2 books, we get 5 new MAIN characters- Jason, a white boy; Piper, a Native American girl, specifically Cherokee if I remember; Leo, a Mexican American boy; Frank, a Chinese American boy; and Hazel, an African American girl. We also get Reyna, who isn’t a main character at first, but I would argue becomes one in House of Hades, and she is Puerto Rican.

And ALL of these characters and their racial identities are handled really well. Like, they are fully fleshed out and genuine characters. This doesn’t feel like shallow, lazy tokenism. Their heritage plays a part in who they are, but is not the ONLY thing about them. Piper, for example, has a father who refuses to play Native American roles in movies because he wants to avoid being stereotyped or type cast and Piper carries that struggle to connect with her heritage with her. Hazel’s experience as a black girl, and a black girl from the 1930s at that, impacted how she was treated growing up and makes up a big part of her backstory. But they aren’t solely defined by these experiences like shallow stereotypes.

It’s well done ,is that I’m saying

-

So at this point, we could say that while Rick had a good grasp on racial diversity and neuro-divergence representation. Most of his characters were still straight, cis, able bodied, children with an unstated or vague religious affiliation. (Seriously, did none of these kids have like..faith in a religion before?)

Now, here is a true, fun fact. On June 30th, 2013, 3 months before the release of House of Hades, I went on Tumblr and wrote an Open Letter to Rick Riordan about how he should really include LGBT+ characters in his books. He had written. Like, 11 children’s books at this point, and despite my headcanons, every character had been portrayed as assumed straight and cis. So I wrote a letter. How much I liked his books, but really, could we have some LGBT+ characters, this IS Greek mythology after all.  I don’t think he ever saw this letter, despite me tweeting it at him.

Among other things in this letter, I go on to list several possibilities for LGBT+ representation in his books, including:  quote: maybe Nico feels an unrequited crush on Percy. A headcanon I had since book 4, Battle of the Labyrinth.

And so, I want my moment, just to say: I. Was. Right. And I told you so.

House of Hades came out in 2013, and well, so did Nico. My favorite character came out of the closet, or, well, was outed and it was heart wrenching. The fandom kind of lost its shit over this. Anyone who had shipped Percy and Nico was throwing a party, homophobes were throwing a fit, it was very emotional. I was gloating a lot.

And let’s be clear- Nico’s sexuality in House of Hades is not...handled the best. It’s better than nothing certainly, and it’s better than Word of God reveals post publication. Rowling. But, by itself, it’s...well...single sad cis gay boy pines over unrequited straight crush hits some stereotypes. None of this is malicious, but it by itself is only so-so representation.

But Rick wasn’t done there, because we still had one more book- Blood of Olympus. Nico gets a super cute boyfriend in the form of Will Solace, and gets some closure with Percy. Now, your mileage may vary with that particular scene. Nico smugly telling Percy he “isn't his type” feels, well, a little out of character and, I dunno, corny. But it’s nice to see Nico get this happy relationship with Will, and I’ll forgive Rick for any stumbles in the exact execution to avert that sad-single-gay trope.

- -

Ok. So, now at last, we get to the 2 series that are still in publication: Gods of Asgard and Trials of Apollo. These two series are publishing concurrently, and  because the Gods of Asgard started publishing first, let’s talk about it first.

I love Gods of Asgard. Truly. These might be my favorite of Riordan’s books. Part of that might just be that after 10 Greek and Roman books, a focus on Norse is refreshing, but I just love it. I love Magnus, I love the Annabeth cameos, I love Sam. Ok, so, the first Gods of Asgard book: Sword of Summer hits two important notes when it comes to minority representation.

Hearth is deaf and mute and uses sign language. This is the first time we’ve had a main character with a clear disability other than ADHD and Dyslexia. Which is really cool. And The consistent use of sign language throughout is neat.

Our second is Sam. Who is muslim and wears a hijab. Like, truly, how many stories do you know about a hijabi muslim valkyrie girl kicking all the ass.

Book 2, Hammer of Thor…well. Remember when I said Nico is my favorite character? Nico might have to fight Alex Fierro for my heart. Alex Fierro. A trans gender fluid child of Loki. I love Alex. Some people cried SJW Gay-Agenda bullshit over Alex like, being trans and gender fluid and, actually mentioning it more than once, but those people are unhappy assholes and I ignore them. I like Alex. Alex is an interesting, complicated character and I can’t wait for the next book.

Also, am I the only one who thinks Magnus and Alex are being set up for some romance? Just wishful thinking? Feels like romance. I ship it. I’ve been right before.

So ok, so We now have racial diversity, representation of multiple kinds of disabilities, a gay character, a gender fluid trans character, and a muslim character. -

Let’s talk about Trials of Apollo.

These books are really fun. If for no other reason than Apollo might actually be the most loud, entertaining narrator we’ve had yet. He’s funny, he’s an asshole. He’s also very loudly and clearly bisexual. Which, duh. How else would you even write Apollo if you have any understanding of Greek mythology?  It’s mentioned a couple of times in the first book, and then even more in the second, where his prior relationships have plot relevance.

The second book also introduced us to Jo and Emmie, a biracial lesbian couple who used to be hunters of Artemis who are now raising a daughter together.

And this is kind of the joy of really GOOD diverse representation. Like, Apollo has faced hardship because of his relationships, with both men and women, but his sexuality itself isn’t a problem with him. Alex is very secure with who they are, but has clearly faced a lot of transphobia. Nico was very closeted and seemed to have a lot of pain tied up in his sexuality and is only just now healing from that with Will. Jo and Emmie clearly faced issues with their relationship, having to leave the hunters, but have built a new life together. We get this great array of experiences, rather than just one prevailing narrative.

I love it, and we’ve come so far from that first bedtime story about a boy trying to find some stolen lightning bolts. - -

So, what’s in the future for Rick Riordan? Well, he hasn’t announced any new book series for after Gods of Asgard and Trials of Apollo wrap up. However, we do know that he is starting his own Publishing Imprint with Disney Hyperion.  Rick will only work as a curator it seems, focusing on having minority authors write fantasy/mythology based books from their native cultures. There are 3 books signed right now,

Jennifer Cervantes’s Storm Runner, which is about a boy having to save the world from a Mayan Prophesy.

Roshani Chokshi’s Aru Shah and the End of Time, about a 12-year-old Indian-American girl who unwittingly frees a demon intent on awakening the God of Destruction

And Yoon Ha Lee’s Dragon Pearl, about a teenage fox spirit on a space colony.

All of which sound AMAZING and I will preorder as soon as Amazon let’s me.

Look, Rick Riordan is not a perfect person or a perfect writer. Some people take issue with him because he has said some rather insulting things about the small number of people who still worship the greek gods. That he took these stories and was dismissive of the people who still value them religiously. Now, The majority of those comments seem to come from blog posts back in 2006, and he did have a brief apology for offending Hellenists on his facebook back in February. and one would hope that this interest on letting minority authors tell stories from their own culture in the future is evidence that he has learned and grown since then.

And not everyone will like Rick Riordan’s books no matter what. They are for kids. They are corny and have bad puns and sometimes meander or forget about important characters for long stretches of time. Sometimes the ideas he has are better than the execution. It happens.

But when I look at his books as a whole, I see Middle school teacher from San Antonio who started with a fun idea and never stopped growing as an author with a dedication to minority representation in his novels. And I certainly appreciate that, and look forward to more of his work for as long as he decides to produce it.

#rick riordan #percy jackson #heroes of olympus #magnus chase #trials of apollo

[itsbenedict]

Two-Faced Jewel: Session 6.5

A half-elf conwoman (and the moth tasked with keeping her out of trouble) travel the Jewel in search of, uh, whatever a fashionable accessory is pointing them at. [Campaign log]

Last time, Looseleaf and Saelhen fought their way to the top of the evil torture tower of the evil torture wizard- only to find out that the guy's been dead for at least a year, and that a dragon has apparently been squatting in his tower. Not content to wait another week to find out what this means, we had an off-schedule mini-session wherein the party finished exploring the unexplored nooks and crannies of Lumiere's Tower.

The first thing to deal with is the thing blocking their return down the stairs- there's a weird big metal coffin-looking dealie that waddled up to the stairs on the fourth floor, but couldn't chase them any further. Going back down, though... they could take a window, but they figure there's no way this thing could be a serious threat. It can barely move, after all- they can probably just push it right over!

Looseleaf pokes it with a stick, and its front splits open down the middle, revealing a giant maw of horrible spikes which snaps at her threateningly.

So it's an iron maiden! Adorable! Still doesn't have legs, or arms, so it's fine, right? They can just stand on the stairs and

whoops nope it's got animated canvas straps inside it that shoot out and ensnare orluthe like a chameleon tongue. okay. so maybe this monster is dangerous actually.

The ensuing fight makes heavy use of a mechanic in D&D called "called shots", where you can take disadvantage on an attack roll in exchange for inflicting some kind of injury on the opponent by hitting them in different specific body parts. They don't want to let Orluthe get shut inside and take a fuckload of stab damage, so they jam Looseleaf's quarterstaff in the doors, slice up its canvas straps, and by force of numbers manage to render nearly all its appendages impotent. The poor torture instrument has disadvantage on all its attack rolls after the called shots go through, and it can't land any more hits! The party eventually wears it down, and Looseleaf lands the finishing blow by scrambling its spirit.

All that's left in their way is the translucent red barrier blocking off the 3rd/4th floor stairs. Not finding anything on the fourth floor to shut it off, they just go via the window like before. Back down on the third floor, Looseleaf uses her spirit sight to notice that the barrier is connected magically to some runes inscribed on the central pillar- it looks like there's some sort of creepy puzzle involving stabbing creepy dolls with creepy doll-sized knives.

Not interested in risking whatever the consequences of solving the puzzle wrong are (given that they already have a way up and down), they move on.

While they're there, Saelhen decides to take another crack at the trapped chest she couldn't open earlier. Rather than risk the trap, she first spends some time expertly disarming the trap built into the lock, before working on the lock itself. A couple good rolls later, and they acquire the treasure! Which is... 60 gold pieces, and a piece of paper with a list of words.

Saelhen fails her Nature check, but Looseleaf recognizes the words on the paper as... the names of craters and other geographical features of the moon.

[WAR_FLASHBACKS.jpg]

No one's quite sure why a list of moon landmarks would be locked up in a highly-secure chest protected by a poison needle trap, but no one rolls high enough on Religion to puzzle it out.

Moving on down, they reach the second floor, which appears to be a laundry room of some sort. The sort where the irons and ironing boards and scrub brushes are alive, and appear to be washing the same clothes over and over and over to the point where most of them have been reduced to sparklingly clean rags. Seems like these animated household objects have been stuck on a loop for a good long time!

There's what appears to be an intact magical cloak hanging on a clothesline in there, but the party opts not to try and take it- doing so would likely provoke some protective laundry automatons.

Saelhen's plan to lure the scrub brush away from the washtub (for... reasons??) fails, since the brush doesn't seem to want to leave the tub- and it's visibly disappointed when Saelhen gives up.

So, they head down to the first floor, finally! As they head down, they're noticed by more animated knives... but it seems these ones have been tasked with cooking a delicious meal, which they happily serve up to the tower's guests! The wheelbarrow from before is there, too, supplying the kitchen with food. The only question is... who's been eating this stuff? Why is the table not covered in rotten, uneaten banquet, if the wizard's been dead? Who's been putting grocery money in the wheelbarrow?

Other things of note in the room...

Benedict I. (GM): The shelves around the center seem to be festooned with various trophies and awards. Looseleaf: trophies. what, like, participation trophies??? school trophies? piano recital trophies?? Benedict I. (GM): These would actually be somewhat recognizable to most of you- you've seen similar things in trophy cases at school. The plaques beneath them seem blacked out in various places- a lot of [REDACTED]. Looseleaf: warball champions of the 1034 school year? Benedict I. (GM): Often built into the plaques. Saelhen du Fishercrown: huh who redacts a plaque Benedict I. (GM): Like, there'll be a flat section of the plaque painted black like it was engraved that way

Looseleaf, with a 20, Investigates a bunch of pertinent information. For instance, a diploma:

Hal Lumiere, PhD in [______]. Blacksky University, Department of Restricted Arts

It appears Hal Lumiere was an alumnus of Blacksky's School of Restricted Arts- the same place Vayen is from. Lumiere was apparently something of a darling there, considering all the awards- but no one in the party has ever heard of him. Except maybe a certain someone who's not telling.

Looseleaf also finds some unopened mail! One is illegible, written in Abyssal, the language of demons.

(Lore note on demons: demons are just like other monsters- evil things that come up from below the mountains and cause trouble. They aren't generally aware of their origins beyond waking up in a deep cave, usually, and aren't motivated by much except causing conflict and hurting people.)

Another letter is written in Common, with just plain awful handwriting:

"hey Lumes why tf arent you home today u fuckin flake ass fairyboy. who am i supposed to get that dank good ouch from if youre off on magic adfentures. this months number shits are: 14.3 6755 304° and then the little bar thing was on the green side but wobbly. now gimmeeeeeee"

It's a bit of an enigma- but even more enigmatic is the third letter Looseleaf finds, written in a hand Looseleaf recognizes. Looseleaf knows who this letter was written by.

"Dr. Lumiere- find enclosed the new spirit hollowing diagrams and the corrected sigil of Aaaaaaagh. This should satisfy our agreement, so I'll leave you with a warning: the lesser gods are not to be trusted." "Yes, their revolution is our best shot at the Project- that much is obvious, barring a road to apotheosis. I understand we need to work with them. I doubt we'll have further contact, so I won't ask you not to reignite this argument- but insofar as it's at all relevant to you in the future, I favor your approach over Kron Green's." "But again, they are not to be trusted. The enemy of our enemy wishes mainly to supplant them, and despite their alliance, not all of them share the same aims. In particular, the one you've taken an interest in seems utterly hostile to the Project. " "If we are to impact the cosmic boardstate, we must play the game. Trust is the abdication of discovery. Choose your allies carefully." And then it is signed with a mark. The mark is of a book, facedown in the way that ruins the spine, sort of shaped to look like a skull. And the initials "Y.T." Looseleaf: youtube. the villain of our story, youtube. Saelhen du Fishercrown: trust is the abdication of discovery, what a goddamn motto Looseleaf: oh my god she's being so edgy well, that is characteristic of her.

She also finds what appears to be a trophy- but the trophy is shaped to look like a globe. Not of the Jewel, but of the moon. Obviously, they take it.

Some experimentation with the moon trophy seems to indicate that the locations marked on the paper from the chest draw out a sort of connect-the-dots pattern, which might be used elsewhere for some purpose. Whatever the pattern is meant to be used for, there's no indication of it here. All that can reasonably be inferred is that it has some connection to the School of Restricted Arts.

Meanwhile, the bookshelves have a few more things of interest. Amidst textbooks on neurology, magic, and speculative religion on a lower shelf, they find a hand-bound book that seems out-of-place.

Benedict I. (GM): Inside, it appears to be a diary. "i m choss n ths iss MY BOOK," it begins.

It appears to span several years of diary entries, from year 259 to 266- ending seven years before the current date, 273. The handwriting gets progressively less atrocious, and the entries are very sporadic- riddled with apologies to the diary for forgetting to write in it.

Benedict I. (GM): Choss, apparently, is a little girl who grew up in this tower. Initially she was very fond of her dad, the owner of the tower. Looseleaf: initially, huh. that's... a... great sign. Benedict I. (GM): Dad is a cool wizard who does fun magic all the time, which she helps with! She is very proud of how much pain she can withstand, and she's developed this sort of self-image as a connoisseur. Of pain. Saelhen du Fishercrown: hell Saelhen's face is getting progressively... stiffer, as she reads. Not angrier, per se, just... flatter. Benedict I. (GM): She helps out with the experiments except for not being allowed to take the hoods off the subjects in the lab. Looseleaf: Lumiere what the shit. Benedict I. (GM): And when there's no subjects, she fills in, and does a very good job, the best job. There's an entry describing how she designed a security system for her dad- she made some dolls and dad enchanted them so they open the door if you stab them right! She's very proud of it. You now know the order of stabs to disable the barrier. Anyway, the later entries seem to represent... entirely standard teen angst. Looseleaf: Hmm. Benedict I. (GM): Dad is being boring and not letting her do the experiments she wants to do and not letting her visit the towns and ugh dad. She gets fed up with him, and the last entry is about how she's leaving to go start her own life in Wheat. Looseleaf: REALLY NOW. Saelhen du Fishercrown: WELL. Looseleaf: ...god, maybe those rumors about wheat being full of insane murderous murder-os weren't, wrong. Saelhen du Fishercrown: if she is in fact a baby dragon Looseleaf: which is not at all guaranteed, by the way.

If you recall from a few sessions back:

To speak with a dragon is to be condemned to some sort of great misfortune, brought about by your own hand. You know the Simurgh from Worm? Listen to its song for too long, and you become sort of a sleeper agent of self-destructive carnage? It’s like a diet version of that. Whatever path your conversation with the dragon puts you on, it’s invariably bad for you, somehow. The metallic dragons, who’re ostensibly “good”, will still ruin your life in some way just by talking to you, even if your immolation does some good for the world on the way out. Nobody wants to talk to a dragon.

Also discovered in CHOSS BOOK is a brief account of a time she had to go to the basement, using the secret entrance underneath... something. Looseleaf almost immediately checks under the table they're sitting at, and finds... yep! A trapdoor leading to the basement!

Next time: the basement awaits!

#tfj log #twofaced jewel #Youtube

[in-the-midst-of-everything]

Mmkay I'm gonna scream about this for a minute.

A couple weeks ago I went back on skout cuz I felt a bit more tolerant of people and in need of stranger interaction. I got a message from a couple looking for a 3rd person for experimental sex and just some overall fun. I agreed to, specifically, a fwb relationship if we hit it off. We did, as far as messaging back and forth everything was pretty good and they both seemed pretty chill and I could see having fun with them. Well we planned a dinner date night, it went pretty well (the date at least. I might vent about the situation with Hope later. idk) despite a weird time at their place where we just sat and watched their housemate play COD...for like an hour...instead of playing cards against humanity like we planned. They were almost as socially awkward as myself, clearly not used to having company in their house. But w/e it was a pretty good night overall, ended up having some fun in the bedroom eventually and they took me home early morning. On the way home they offandedly started bitching about people they knew, I have no idea where conversation started but just talking shit about people I didn't know. At one point she mentioned Dan with the implication that he raped her, just casually and out of the blue. It put me on alarm but also I know these guys for about a week and a half vs. Dan for several years + Kenzie trusts him sooo....

I brought that up to Kenzie the next day and she talked to Dan, I guess (Brittany is her name btw) is a chronic liar and was pretty shit to him as well, of course the whole thing isn't as black and white as she made it out to be. But either way I have no part in either of their pasts so I kinda dropped it, but was kinda wary of Brittany after that.

Oh, and it just so happened my phone started acting up the day after our date, I was busy with art and errands all day so didn't really use it much, but that night I forgot to plug it in and it died. So the next day I plugged it in and it sucked battery faster than it would charge, which concerned me and I decided to not use it much, if at all, the rest of the day, told Brittany about it before I went offline. BTW date night was Wednesday, errands and art day was Thursday, and phone hiatus Friday. So the next day, Saturday, I don't remember what I was doing all day but I still wasn't using my phone much and ignored messages from Brittany cuz I also lacked the energy to hold conversation.

Sunday. I get a message simply "why won't u talk to us." And I just go...I told you?? My phones shit and trying not to use it. Apparently she's convinced she scared me away with the mention of Dan. Pretty big assumption, but w/e. I tell her no, I just dropped that cuz it doesn't involve me. Then she gets all defensive and like "well when you actually want us around again let us know" but then that turns immediately into "yknow what it was nice meeting you but bye"

And I'm just like

?????

And we go back and forth a bit, she's like I fell for you and you just keep ignoring me you dont talk to us like you used to, it feels like you just wanted sex so I don't wanna get hurt so I'm letting it go.

I'm like. It's been 3 days. I even said why I wasn't answering. And ya, kinda, I did just want the sex+friends that's literally what I said when I met them.

I'm like sorry, we can't compromise on this I'm not getting into a relationship (esp not to a married couple with 2 kids) so if you can't just be friends it's not gonna work. She kept asking what to do now then. Like...??? It's obvious??? Goddamn.

We stopped talking for a couple days, then I got a total bullshit stream of texts from her about how "the other day wasn't me, that was Joe talking idk why he thought that's what I wanted but I promise we can just be friends I'm not like that."

Bull. Shit. That was totally her I talked to, and she was clingy from the day we started talking. And she fucking.

Idolized me. I hate that. Kept calling me perfect and a goddess and shit n im like no??? Don't do that you literally don't know me, and the second I do something not ideal for you it'll be cataclysmic cuz you put me on a fucking pedistal. And yes, that totally fucking happened. I don't respond to messages for 2 days and the world comes down on her. I refuse a relationship and she immediately wants to cut all ties. Like fuck, man. I can't fucking deal with that shit over people I literally just met.

And like. I try to ease into conversation with people, from the start I make sure I'm not too quick to reply to messages so maybe they'll get the hint that I'm not on my phone continuously? Or I guess I mean like if I start out with instant responses, they'll think somethings wrong when I start to slow with responses, when literally I just can't devote chunks of my time to /only/ messaging someone. And I did that with her right away, even told her I like to multitask so I'm never just sitting with my nose in messenger. But still, this shit.

AND, I even reiterated to her a couple times I don't want a relationship. Of any kind. I'm not in the right place mentally and I don't have my own emotions in order, let alone working with someone elses. I think she assumed cuz we were getting along so well that my mind would change?? Idk. But I'm sick of it

And I'm still sore about it too, cuz I was genuinely excited to have that kind of interaction, people to talk to and hook up with occasionally. I was ready to have some fun again, but of course it can't be that simple. Gotta wrap it all up in emotions and fuck it up before it goes anywhere.

And also, it felt good to be sexy for once. They both kept telling me I was hot and gorgeous, which I still don't quite believe myself, and it was nice to hear. They (she) just pushed it too far into idolization and I can't deal with that.

I just felt like there were the beginnings of a good dynamic there, but it's too fucking exhausting to deal with someone that clingy and emotional when I don't have a deeper connection. And it's so fucking disappointing cuz I'd thought I finally found someone who could work with me.

Guess not.

#ramblings #march 2018