#and when r says be careful hed brush it off | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

saradika · 3 years

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ok so. i am a monsterfucker at heart and i know u r too. so consider this:

din is a mandalorian, and always keeps his helmet on. u think it’s about his creed and yea, it kind of is but mainly it’s for your protection.

like just consider din being like a vampire and ur scent is just so good to him that he can barley control himself with the helmet on, god forbid he ever take it off. he feels downright feral every time u brush past him, and the fact that he knows u like him, he can smell your arousal every time he comes back with a bounty hopped up on adrenaline and just oozing confidence and dominance, drives him insane

but if you ever do catch him with it off in some crazy situation, your scent would just overwhelm him and drive him nuts

yeah hed have u on all fours with his cock in ur cunt while u beg for more in no time. i just know it.

does this even make sense

Lee. Babe. You could not have sent me a better thot. ❤️ I am so in love with this - if you say “vampire”, I come sprinting. You got me real good with this one.

I hope you don’t mind, I typed up some bulleted thoughts on how this could go, based on your ask! I just honestly loved it so much. I couldn’t stop thinking about it last night.

Vampire!Din Djarin x F!Reader

Rated E | 1.3k words

-------

You always thought his creed was the reason he hid his face from you. That had made sense, that was something you understood and expected.

Thinking you could change a person’s belief or religion just for your own preferences was cruel, and the thought had never entered your mind.

But then again, neither had this.

The door swished open, and before you could move, before you could make even a sound he was gliding in, his shiny Beskar smeared with rusty-looking grime, ripping the helmet from his head.

His head turns, and that’s when you’re trapped, utterly locked in by his gaze.

It’s his Eyes.

You’re drawn to them, helplessly - the iris a biting, crimson red, the sclera surrounding a deep, inky shade that feel bottomless.

Your gut twists as you stare into them, and it’s only with effort you’re able to tear yourself away.

You miss his snarl as you snap your eyes shut, the way his lips stretch over teeth, flashing a pair of canines as sharp as razors.

But it’s too late - there’s no going back, not now.

The both of you know it, his breath coming in heavy huffs from where he stands a few feet from you.

“Look at me.” His voice is low and rough, the unfiltered sound making your pulse spike

So, you do. And he’s beautiful.

Something in the back of your mind is whispering, telling you to leave, to run, but you push that voice out of your thoughts. This is the man you care so much for, how could he hurt you?

Din’s hands curl around the doorframe, his posture looking like he’s trapped between wanting to bolt, and - well. You’re not sure.

You breathe out, eyes still roving over his face, tracing the facial hair dusting his upper lip and chin. If you could, you’d stare at him for hours.

In a world of so many species and creatures so different than yourself, what does it matter to you if his eyes are red, instead of the brown, green -or even blue - you had imagined?

But he’s still gazing at you like he’s half-hoping you’ll run.

And now that you’ve seen him, all of him, it just makes you want him more. You want those lips on yours, on your breasts, between your legs-

He growls and it’s frightening, the sound a deep rumble in his chest that you can hear from your perch on the bunk.

“I can smell you, mesh’la,” His voice is smoky, low and rough in his throat. “How much you crave it, can smell how wet your hot cunt is for me. Can practically taste you on my tongue.”

It’s almost as if he’s speaking out loud to himself, his eyes slightly glazed over, like he sees you but doesn’t see you.

The embers in your lower belly heat, and your thighs clench together. He sniffs the air again, his knuckles white with the strength of his grip.

Din’s unusual eyes find yours again, and he looks hungry. His voice, amplified without the helmet, shoots straight to your core.

“Gods, what I’d do to take you right now.”

Your brain is about five seconds behind, scrambling to catch up. Other parts of your body choose the words for you instead, more primitive, delicate parts of you.

“S-so take me.”

“You don’t know what you’re asking.” His clipped voice grits, sharp like flint on rock.

You don’t, not really - but you do.

“Take me. Don’t make me beg.”

He looks like he could eat you alive, and you think he just might. Din hesitates, and then he lunges.

You’re stripping down and he’s helping you, hands fisted in the fabric of your shirt as he tugs it over your head. Your thin pants are nearly ripped off your legs, and you realize with a start that he’s been holding back.

Since the beginning, most likely. Either to keep from hurting you, or keep from scaring you. But he’s too worked up now to keep it in check.

Before you can blink, you’re on the bunk, knees folded and bent up near your ears, on full display for him.

His moan is wanton at the sight, and then he’s leaning down to lick you, his tongue pressing against the tight ring of muscle, making you squeak, before moving upwards to your wet, slick-soaked folds.

Din eats you like he’s starving, his lips and tongue working sloppily against you, tasting every inch, going back to cover all of you.

His tongue then dips deep into you, deeper than you’ve felt before, licking and tasting your inner walls and groaning against your skin

You curse him for keeping this from you. Mourning the before - you’d never be able to forget the way this man is ruining you with his perfect, talented tongue.

He growls against your skin, and you see them this time, the set of perfectly pointed teeth, made for piercing.

When his tongue moves up to your clit, two of his fingers sinking into you and pressing, you’re gone, hips rocking against his face and wailing as you cum hard around him.

You see stars as he licks you through it, his tongue dipping deep into you again to taste your slick, savoring the way you gush around him.

Then, he’s flipping you around, pushing you onto knees and elbows while your pussy finishes convulsing. He lines up this thick length, the tip already pressing and pushing between your folds.

With a grunt he bottoms out into you, a loud moan ripped from your lungs as he fills you. He feels thicker than usual, seeming to swell within you as his hips rest flush with yours.

He gives you a brief moment to adjust, but the second you grind back against him, he’s off, hands around you as he builds up to rough pace, skin slapping loudly on skin.

His chest presses against your back as he leans over you, the weight grounding you as his cock rubs your inner walls, sending sparks down your spine.

Din’s tongue drags over your neck, tasting your skin, feeling the hot pulse of veins under skin. He moans at the sound of your pounding heart under his lips, pressing open-mouthed kisses against your flesh.

His teeth scrape against your sensitive skin and you shudder beneath him, but he pulls himself back, not allowing himself to bite down, though he aches to do so.

No words can come out as he fucks you, pinning your chest and shoulders to the bed as he ruts roughly into you, your breath coming as heavy pants in time with his thrusts.

“Could always smell you,” he grunts, hand fisting in your hair, tugging on it until your head rolls to the side. “You smell incredible, so, so sweet… never imagined you’d taste this good, though. Could eat you all day.”

The fingers circling on your clit leave for a moment while he sucks your release from them, his fingers disappearing between perfect lips. They’re slick with his spit as his lips part, and he returns them to where he’s been working you.

“Been driving me fucking crazy, your scent is everywhere on this ship. Takes all my self-control not to just take you whenever I see you look at me like that.”

His hips slow to a grind, his cock rocking in and out until he’s rubbing against the spongy spot on your walls that has you tightening up beneath him.

“L-Like what?” You manage to concentrate long enough to ask.

“Like you want me”.

You knew what he meant. Not a carnal ‘want’ though, Maker, you did want that too. An aching want, a bone-deep desire, something completely overwhelming and devouring.

“I-I do,” your eyes squeeze shut, the pleasure blinding and cresting, you’re suddenly coming undone again, “F-Fuck Din. I do, I want you, I want-”

Your muscles bearing down, your pussy clamping around on his cock as you flutter around him, voice choking on a moan as you cum again.

Din’s hips stutter against yours, feeling your heat around him, pressing himself as deeply into you as he can.

“Feels so good, cyar’ika. How do you always feel so fucking perfect-“

He’s only a few thrusts behind you, spilling into you with a deep groan, his forehead buried between your shoulder blades.

His cock pulses and swells in you as he unloads, ropes of cum painting your walls with each shaky pump of his hips.

Din leaves you spent and exhausted, his body pressing you into the thin mattress, nose buried against the smooth column of your neck.

“Mine.” His voice is tired, softer now, and you’re still not sure if he’s talking to you or himself. But you answer anyway, pressing your face to the warm hand cradling your head.

“Yours.”

———

(Tagging a couple mutuals 💕: @rexsjaigeyes, @justwastelandbabyy, @zinzinina, @pala-din-djarin, @latenightsthoughtsnstuff, @mandaloriandin, @deathwatchnightowl, @clanoffetts, @jangofettswife, @thiccumz, @themaydecemberist, @delusionsxfgrandeur)

#thank you SO MUCH!#I was so so excited to read this #what an incredible idea #lee your mind #vampire!Din #din djarin x f!reader #din djarin x reader #din djarin

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mydekuacademia · 3 years

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nsfw alphabet for tenya iida?

Sure!

C, D, K, and T found here

A: Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Hes very by-the-book with aftercare. He'll get you a glass of water, wipe you down with a washcloth, make sure you're comfortable, but he's not the best with the more intimate aspect of aftercare. He definitely gets better with it over time

B: Body Part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner)

He loves your face and hands. Face because he adores your expressions, and hands because he loves loves LOVES holding them

on him, maybe this is overplayed, but he likes his legs. Not necessarily his calves, but overall. He knows theyre strong and hes proud of it

E: Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

No experience whatsoever lol. He used to be such a straight edge student that he didnt even consider having sex until marriage, but after the Stain incident, he loosens up a lot. Its slow going, but he gradually accepts his desires and gains some experience with you

F: Favorite Position

Doggy, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, 69, honestly p much anything. The straight edged ones are always the kinky ones

G: Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc.)

99.9% of the time, hes completely serious. The only time he wont be is if he had a very stressful day and wants to let loose with you. Even then, he isnt cracking jokes or anything

H: Hair (How well-groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Extremely well-trimmed and shaped. To Iida, it's just another part of good hygiene, so he really really prefers to keep himself well-groomed. Even if you prefer more hair, he probably wont budge

I: Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

So intimate like holy shit. Hes constantly caressing your cheek and brushing your hair aside and peppering small kisses along your exposed skin. His first priority is to make you feel loved, so it's rarely just mindless fucking

J: Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

He only masturbates maybe once a month, and only to take care of the biological need. He doesnt have the highest sex drive, so its not a huge thing for him

L: Location (Favorite places to do the do)

Bed, mostly. He has a reputation to uphold as the class rep, so he wont risk having sex in a place you could get caught. Absolutely no common room or empty classroom. The most adventurous place hed be willing to try is a locked closet, but even thats a big maybe

M: Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Seeing you really embody what a hero should be, healthy communication, when you show passion for anything, and if you help him wrangle the class. That last one especially 😎

N: NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Watersports or scat, gunplay, knifeplay

Theres not too much hes 100% against tbh

O: Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

He prefers receiving over giving. At first, it was because he was insecure over his lack of knowledge of how to give oral, but when he learns how to do it, he realizes he generally just prefers receiving. That doesnt mean he wont eat you out/suck you off like his life depends on it tho

P: Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Hes Sonic, hes gotta go fast. He is at least gentle about it tho

Q: Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

Hes fine with them. He knows hero life is busy and there isnt always a chance to take your time, so hes totally chill with quickies

R: Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Totally down to experiment with kinks and fetishes. As stated before though, he wont be risky with locations or try any of his 100% nos

S: Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

He'll last as long as you can go. You last for 2 rounds? Okay. 5 rounds? Hes still good. Only 1? Thats fine.

U: Unfair (how much they like to tease)

My god, Iida can tease the hell out of you when hes in the mood. His favorite way of doing so is restraining your hands and making you watch as he strokes himself. If hes feeling nice, he might put a vibe on you while doing so

V: Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

He likes to whisper in your ear during sex. He doesnt moan or grunt a lot, but mans will talk to you p often

W: Wild Card (Random headcanon)

He lowkey wants to have an orgy with the dekusquad, but he'd absolutely never say so

X: X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

Hes b i g and thicque. Definitely over average and girthy enough that its a complete necessity to really prep you every time

Y: Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Not really that high tbh. He enjoys sex, but he doesnt often actively seek it out. He'll have sex with you if hes bored or wants physical affection or if you want it

Z: ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

If he really went for it, he falls asleep pretty fast. Otherwise, he can stay awake for a long time

#iida tenya x reader #iida tenya #boku no hero academia #bnha #bnha x reader #my hero academia #mha #mha x reader #spicy

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warmau · 4 years

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svt ranked on grimmest most public places theyd makeout with you @ based on the one i did for monsta x and also i love torturing carats hiii <3

13) seungkwan he has class coming out of his pores there is no way on this green earth that you two are engaging in anything past pleasant conversations and jane austen-esque finger brushing in public ........ things of intimacy and romance are meant for the confides of ones home!!!! where it can be rose and honey scented and you can both put on an episode of the bachelor at the lowest possible volume in the background

12) dino just thinks its weird if u ask him to makeout with you anywhere but on his couch when no one else is home like um why would u want strangers to see us do that thats weird like the kid is normal dont scar him with a proposal as such ........ even if u were like gonna lean in to kiss him in the back of the car he’d be like no, jeonghan is in the passenger seat and he wont let me live it down if we do that

11) mingyu is surprisingly shy for as big as he is and how much space he can take up hes like id rather not disturb the nice people eating their applebees by indulging in mouth to mouth ...... and ur like baby please never call it that again. idk he just seems like hed be very timid about the whole thing and hed be like what if we get arrested like thats not going to happen but hes like what if. likes holding hands all the time though.

10) vernon says he could never disrespect you by making out with you in a place thats not like a park at midnight or under the fleece blanket he got as a christmas present from cheol.....ur like what? and hes like i just think its not cool to get all up on u in public like that and ur like but im cool with it and hes like but are u basically hes just too embarrassed to say “i know people think im quirky but i like keeping our kissing between us”. that one time he posted yall kissing in some museum was simply for the gram clout.

9) joshua is sometimes beckoned by the idea of a little risky handsy kisses at the movie theater,,,,,,maybe a little bit of your teeth in his neck on the bus ride home.........but never anything dramatic, like he isnt about to grab your waist in public and go to town when there are children across the street like cmon ... though i think when u get all touchy with him before you two are going to go avengers 3 billion or whatever hes not opposed

8) woozi has general apathy toward where you two do it, and this isnt just about pda this is literally about anything ever. you two could have a heartfelt conversation about your futures on a roller coaster and that mf would be like ok i want to marry you mid loop-de-loop hes insane. so if u wanna kiss up on his neck at the home depot while u r forcing him to pick out plants for his studio then so be it!!!!!!!!!!!!

7) jeonghan the first month of the relationship acts like hes never thought about anything but kissing you with his eyes closed, hugging with enough space left for the holy spirit, and most definitely tongue is off limits. hedonistic, if you ask him. which is a blatant lie because once the mark is up and jeonghan feels comfortable with you its like ,,,,,,,,, let me groan your name into your mouth in the middle of freezer aisle of this whole foods but i didnt mean it but im too in love with you to care

6) wonwoo would makeout with you at a gamestop dude hed make out with you in the best buy video games discount aisle lmfao half probably to flex on sad gamers and half because wonwoo is the type that would consider it a date for you to come and pick out shit for his computer setup. youll be like ok we can kiss while we’re waiting to buy you animal crossing for the switch but we cant kiss in the panera bread? and wonwoo is like baby please there is a family enjoying their grilled cheese in the booth across from us. oh my god wonwoo be like hey babe come here and kiss me and ur like ok and ur like wait are u streaming and hes like yeah say hi to my twitch subscribersjfdkhgjd

5) seungcheol knows when and where to act up and sometimes the where is like ........... the baskin robbins ur in at 3 am after leaving some shitty house party. the employee behind the counter is like “how many sco- ok ill wait” he does draw the line at serious shit like office buildings and churches and friendly dinners because like listen jared at the baskin robbins isnt gonna say shit but hes like let me not get my hands up ur shirt at ur cousins barbeque

4) seokmin is filled to the brim with love so its hard to stop him from kissing you regardless of where you are. anything is game. if you as much as enter in 5ft of him hes like hahahaha kissing time!!!!! the thing about him though is that he does have types of kisses that are ok like you guys can highschool kiss at some restaurant or date spot and then you can go all out, legs around his waist, hands on your ass kiss in the elevator to his place - and if someone comes in you both are like “wait for the next one”

3) minghao would be number one, but he has some off limits spots due to his need to keep up appearances like even though after youre done kissing him you look a hurricane hit you hes like wait lemme clean up and comes out looking like he just stepped out of the house fresh - thats why he doesnt care where, but it has to have a bathroom nearby so he can make sure he looks good. you know its true love when he starts fixing your hair and clothes too.

2) hoshi will pretend to be coy and tease about it for like two minutes at most and then he’s like fuck it do whatever you want to me in the middle of this public swimming pool bro he’s so nuts he’d be like pushing your hands off his chest for the first half of the movie and then the next half the ushers are having to ask you two to please kindly LEAVE the theater. hoshi “no we cant kiss waiting for our fries” to “lets see how long we can make out in the ballpit” .....hes only number two because he plays like he wont do it but he will

1) junhui will makeout with you at your best friends wedding. junhui will makeout with you in the middle of traffic. junhui will bite up your neck in the presence of your boss, guaranteed it doesnt get you fired. junhui will start taking layers of clothes off at a starbucks and then probably get chased up the street for public indecency if thats what you want from him. he never says no because he never wants to miss out on a chance to makeout ......... he’s insane he’d be like bleeding from his nose after getting hit by a car or something and ur like lemme call the emts and hes like what if you makeout with me instead nose is broken anyway ......... ugh we have no choice but to stan

#minghao like a goldfish cracker the snack that smiles back! goldfish!

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sporesgalaxy · 5 years

Text

You know what? Fuck it. Here's the whole ass WIP script for the Danny Phantom/Ben 10/Deadpool crossover nightmare, which is called #follow ur crossover dreams, by the way. I think copy-pasting on my phone is gonna delete some italics but whatever.

Reminder that it's still a really early draft with a lot I plan on changing (wade Motormouth wilson doesnt say nearly enough bullshit, for starters), but hopefully u will enjoy it. happy birthday to me, my gift is letting myself share ideas without maximum effort

[BEN is running through a crowd of high school students, excitedly. He is on his phone] BEN: C'mon, Gwen, just tell me where to go! I wanna fight some bad guys today! It's been weeks! [GWEN is on a computer] GWEN: Ben, for the last time, you are NOT going into this alone! We aren't even sure what's causing this yet! Seismic activity at this scale is totally unheard of around here, and whatever's causing it-- BEN: Is gonna get it's butt whooped by the one and only Benn Tennyson! BEN: Don't worry, I can totally handle this! GWEN: Yeah, cause things always work out perfectly when you say that. BEN: Just give me the location, and you can catch up with me there! GWEN: No, Ben. I'll fill you in when we know more, but.until then, don't run off. [BEN is dejectedy watching TV at home, when suddenly, there is another earthquake. Soon after, a newswoman reveals the epicenter just outside of town, and Ben gets an idea] [BEN gets off a public bus at a bus stop far outside of town. He looks out into a dry hilly wilderness, and down to his phone gps to confirm he is going in the right direction.] BEN: all right...I didn't wanna risk timing out before I got there, but I think I'm close enough now... [BEN places his phone gps at his feet, closes his eyes, and slaps the Omnitrix] [BEN transforms into Stinkfly] BEN: Well, I was hoping for XLR8, but I guess I can work with this? [BEN picks up his phonr and flies off] [when he reaches the epicenter BEN finds, embedded into a large hill, an abandoned lab of some sort.] BEN: ooOh [BEN enters the lab, and shortly times out, becoming human again. He sort of tries to sneak, but is clearly too excited/curious to be very effective] [The lab is full of rusting, inscruitable equiptment. Finally, Ben enters a natural cave turned testing area deep inside the lab, a cavernous room machinery littering the floor. There seems to be a fixation on machinery that we would recognize as Danny's parents' portal, but not embedded into a wall, so like a door attatched to a tube. Spare parts and dissasembled prototypes rest along the edges of the room, and a few assembled peices rest towards one end.] [Ben stands on the far south end of the cave, looking around at all of the strange wiring and such.] BEN: I wonder if this is Plumber tech... [BEN kicks a bundle of cords on the floor, and the sound echoes through the room.] [Then, a stranger sound eminates from somewhere just outside of the cavern. And another, similar, closer sound is accompanied by a visible flash. And then-- in a green streak, DANNY bursts into the air in the cavernous space, and then hits the floor and skids. When he stops, he turns human as he falls unconscious] [BEN has no fucking idea what is going on] BEN: uh...h...HEY. ARE YOU...OKAY? DANNY: ... BEN: HELLO? HELO-O? DP: ya think he's dead? BEN: AUGH!!!! [BEN jumps violently, very surprised by Deadpool's presence, and takes a step back] BEN: Who the heck are you?! DP: Call me Deadpool! [BEN gives him a look of utter disbelief. That is the stupidest superhero name he's ever heard. He's about to say that, but then,] DANNY: [groans] DP: [hops down. Puts a hand out, signalling for Ben to stay] Stay here, kid. [Ben is offended to be belittled even if it's reasonable. He stands with an angry look on his face for a moment before following just a few steps behind deadpool, hand at the ready above his watch.] [DP veeery cautiosly walks over to Danny and then....abruptly switches gears, standing up straight and gently bumping the boy's shoulder with his foot] DP: hey. hey. get up. DANNY: five more minutess.... DP: ...7Your mom made pancakes? [DANNY's eyebrows furrow. He groans again. He props himself up, and rubs his head. He's covered in dirt and some blood. He opens his eyes and his expression is full of exhaustion and dread as he processes his unfamiliar surroundings. He looks up at Deadpool] DANNY: ...........I don't smell any pancakes. [DEADPOOL and DANNY stare at eachother for a moment. DANNY seems to be waiting for something. He suddenly looks at BEN, incredulous] DANNY: So are either of you going to attack me, or are we having a staring contest? BEN: I dunno, are YOU going to attack? [DANNY is so tired. He's had a long day] DANNY: I'd prefer not to, but it tends to happen a lot. DP: Well that's depressing! BEN: Well if none of us are fighting, I have a question. BEN: Where'd you two come from? DANNY: Ghost portal. DP: Time travel. BEN: ... BEN: You're not giving me much to work with, here. [BEN points to DANNY] BEN: Especially you. I get time travel, I can live with that-- DP: Thank god. BEN: --But, "ghost portal?" Like a portal for ghosts? Are you dead?? [DP slowly prods Danny with his foot again. Danny is too busy suddenly realizing that he's in human form to be concerned with that] DANNY: I--uh-- BEN: Was that what was up with the green energy? DANNY: Maybe I just went through the ghost portal, ok? I--where are we? BEN: Somewhere on the outskirts of Bellwood, Nevada. DANNY: Nevada? BEN: Nevada DANNY: Huh. DANNY: And why are you here? BEN: [excited to sound smart] There was some unnatural seismic activity around here, and I came to check it out, see if it was anything nefarious. BEN: [cocky] You know, usual superhero stuff. [Danny is a little shocked. He's never really met another superhero before, who wasn't a clone, or accusing Danny of being evil or something] DANNY: oh. BEN: What? DANNY: You're...you're really a superhero? DP: You're like 12 is that safe? [What is the deal with all these young superheroes but say it funnier] BEN: I'm 16!!! DP: Children trying to be superheroes never works out well, trust me kid. BEN: I'm not a child!! Why do you care, huh? DP: Cause I hang out with a lot of superheroes and the heroism business has never done anyone's mental health ANY favors. [DANNY puts his hed in his hands] DANNY: Ugh, tell me about it. BEN: Ha! You AREN'T a normal kid! DANNY: oops. BEN: What can you do?? Do you have GHOST POWERS? [DANNY bites his lip] DANNY: What about you? Do you have powers? BEN: I can turn into any of hundreds of aliens! DANNY: ...care to show me? [BEN looks at the Omnitrix. It's still timed out] BEN: ...in theory... [Danny raises an eyebrow] [meanwhile, Deadpool loses interest. He starts climbing on stuff, looking at the scattered tech.] BEN: Uhhh...can it wait a minute? I just flew here. DANNY: What?? BEN: [gestures to watch, grinning sheepishly] Alien tech! BEN: I swear I'll show you later. What about you! Show me yours! [Deadpool arches an eyebrow at them in the distance] DANNY: ...I guess, since you already guessed it... BEN: What are you so worried about? Ha, haven't you ever met another superhero before? [Ben was sort of kidding, but...] DANNY: BEN: DANNY: Uh, no. Not really. BEN: ...So do you fight bad guys all on your own? DANNY: Uh, yeah? I'm kinda the only person who can. [Reconsiders, and adds with bitterness] Well, the only one who can and will. [Ben thinks about that for a second. He knows how it feels to think you're the only person who can save the world, but Ben is usually wrong when he assumes that's the case. He doesn't like imagining how he'd feel without all the support he's gotten in his hero-ing career. He's genuinely concerned for Danny.] [Danny notices the concern in Ben's expression. Ben seems to be about to say something, but Danny suddenly feels insecure about being pitied. He finally stands up, brushing himself off] DANNY: But like, I have friends, and plenty of tech they can use to help me out. I'm just the only...I guess I'm the only superpowered person willing to deal with fighting ghosts all the time, okay? Whatever! I've been at it for 2 years, I'm used to it. [Ben then adds something together in his head] BEN: Wait, have you never heard of me? Ben 10? DP: Wow! Humble! BEN: No, seriously! Never? Have you ever seen any aliens? DANNY: Uh, no? BEN: Where are you from? DANNY: Colorado. BEN: I've saved the world, like, several times. [DANNY and DP raise an eyebrow each] BEN: Publicly!! People know about me! I'm a big deal!! This is--You guys aren't from here. I need to take you to the Plumbers, so we can-- [A portal powers up again. DANNY seems to suddenly remember something. He goes stiff] DANNY: Oh no. BEN: What? Is that the Ghost Portal? DANNY: Yeah. And you're about to meet the guy who punched me through it. [DP rejoins them to look at the threat] DP: Oh, now that you two have your shit figured out, I should mention I'm from another universe. BEN: WHAT! You said time travel! DP: Yeah, time travel gone horribly, horribly wrong. BEN: How??? I've time travelled a few times and never seen anyine mess it up that bad. DANNY: Yeah since when does time travel take you to other universes? DP: OH SO WE'RE ALL TIME TRAVEL EXPERTS HERE ARE WE??? I'm not telling you two how to live YOUR lives! DP: How about I start bragging about being a superhero expert! Neither of you even know what an X-man *IS!* BEN: Like from the comics? [DP looks at Ben. He won't say it out loud but his expression says "WHAT THE FUCK DUDE"] [BEN shrugs]

[time to get DISJOINTED!!! Here's 2 comic transcripts]

...[some fighting I havent written yet]...

DP: DANNY WHY IS YOUR GHOST DAD SO HOT?? DANNY: HE'S NOT MY DAD. PLEASE DON'T CALL HIM THAT, IT'S A WHOLE *THING* WITH HIM-- [VLAD beams] VLAD: Now, Daniel, is that any way to speak to your father?? DANNY: SEE?! Now he'll never shut up about it! VLAD: I've had enough of your sass, young man! You're GROUNDED. [VLAD spikes Danny into the ground HARD.] [DP is pissed off now. He reaches for his katanas.] DP: Ok I get the picture.

...[more unwritten fighting]...

VLAD: Well, now that I have your undivided attention-- [DANNY has just been punched into the ground. He's sitting up, now] DANNY: --You can start the evil monologue. Joy. VLAD: Evil is such a reductive word. Don't you ever get tired of being beaten half to death to protect people that couldn't care less if you lived or died? [DANNY stands up, with some difficulty] DANNY: You *would* think having a conscience is exhausting. [VLAD is taking a lazy step towards Danny every few moments] VLAD: ...Have you noticed where we are, Daniel? VLAD: Because it isn't Amity Park. It's not even in the same universe as Amity Park. VLAD: And it's not anywhere your idiot father will ever bother finding, seeing as it has nothing whatsoever to do with ghosts. [VLAD is standing over Danny, now] VLAD: Do you know what that means, my boy? VLAD: Nothing I do here can spoil my reputation. VLAD: And none of your little friends are coming to save you. [VLAD places a hand on Danny's shoulder, gripping too tight] VLAD: So VLAD: I'm going to make you the same offer I made you the night of the reunion VLAD: One. Last. Time. VLAD: Either abandon Jack and let me teach you how to really use your powers, [VLAD summons some ghostly energy between his hand and Danny's shoulder] VLAD: Or force me to make poor, dear Maddie file a missing person's report that will never be resolved.

[wow direct segue into comic!]

..[just a tad more unwritten fighting]...

[Vlad has Ben by the neck very far up in the air, and Ben is frantically pressing his Omnitrix] VLAD: [cackles] Goodness, I think your powers might be even more tempermental than Daniel's! It's a little sad, honestly. I was looking forward to a real challenge for once. DP: [on the ground, a distance away] Superpowers shmuperpowers [cocks gun, and fires a couple of shots at Vlad] [Vlad was watching DP talk, unimpressed. He becomes intangible, clearly no longer interested in Ben, allowing him to plummet to his death] [After becoming tangible again, and without breaking eye contact, in a flash of pink energy, Vlad is right in front of Deadpool, and violently pins him to a wall] DP: AWH, you can teleport?! That's not even fair!! VLAD: [close to Deadpools face, crushing his neck harder] No. It isn't. And that's just how I like it. DP: [choking] [thinking] don't say harder daddy don't say harder daddy don't say harder daddy [cut to Ben falling through the air, desperately, repeatedly smacking the Omnitrix] BEN: PLEASE WORK PLEASE WORK PL-- [Danny swoops in and catches him] BEN: [clinging to Danny, obviously spooked but trying to be cool] Thanks! DANNY: [amused] Don't mention it. [Danny puts Ben down on the ground] BEN: Um..where are your legs? DANNY: Oh, they uh...they just do that sometimes. DANNY: Is something wrong with your watch? BEN: [glares at the Omnitrix] It just does this, sometimes. [Danny sees something coming] DANNY: Well you'd better fix it fast! [Ben looks up just as Danny turns them both intangible, seconds before Deadpool is sent hurtling through them and into the ground] [BEN is grinning, watching his hands as they turn re-tangible] BEN: That is SO COOL! I've only ever gotten to do that to myself! Y'know, as an alien! [DANNY was looking at DP's crater, but turns to BEN, surprised at the genuine enthusiasm] DANNY: [maybe blushing a little?] Uh, thanks! [BEN grins at him, and Danny smiles back. They're cute.] [Deadpool's hand pops out of the crater, waving (flailing)...reassuringly?] DP: Don't worry about me, all he did was break [groans] most of my bones. [Danny grabs Ben and pulls him out of the way before Vlad fires an energy blast at Deadpool] VLAD: Still think you can manage without superpowers? [DP sits up painfully and slowly, and coughs] DP: Ac-- [Vlad hits him with a copious amount of energy blasts for an unnecessarily long time as he slowly lowers to the ground] [When Vlad lands and stops firing, he turns around to face Danny and Ben] VLAD: Where were we, Daniel? [Danny is horrified. He's gripping a fistful of Ben's shirt like his life depends on it, expecting to have to save him a third time. Ben is a bit shaken but still determined, and holds his hand at the ready over the Omnitrix] VLAD: ...That was rhetorical, my boy. I had just asked you a very simple question. VLAD: [turning his gaze to Ben] And I don't want to repeat myself. [Ben is not quite picking up on Vlad's thinly veiled threat. Danny, bug-eyed, follows Vlad's gaze to Ben, and is clearly absolutely terrified to be responsible for the deaths of two people he just met. Danny tightens his grip on Ben's shirt.] DANNY: ...I-- [a gunshot hits Vlad from behind. Vlad is completely shocked] [behind him, DEADPOOL is sitting up in the crater, charred to all hell but somehow still alive. He appears to only have one (barely) functioning arm left, which is holding the smoking gun] DP: I never said I didn't have any superpowers, jackass. [DP narrows his eyes] DP: I just like guns. [DP tries to shoot VLAD a few more times, but VLAD has turned intangible, and flies to a safer distance] Vlads gonna say some shit and run off Im not done yet but hoo boy. Oh man.

#void screaming #follow ur crossover dreams

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itsjustaphase-mom · 5 years

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Luther Hargreeves

ok listen. i know he is certainly not a fan favourite and i absolutely hated him the first few times i watched ua. but this time, i rewatched it specifically to try to sympathize with luther and guys there are so many things at play here

he doesn’t realize the extent to which his siblings were abused. he brushes klaus off and doesn’t think twice about locking up vanya again because he just assumes they had the same experience. he’s not being an asshole (on purpose), he just never stopped to think about the fact that being Hargreeves’ favourite made life a lot easier for him.

similar to the first note, he never stopped to consider the implications of having powers that hurt to use. he has super strength, something that, compared to some of the other powers in the family, is nothing. he just doesnt realize what seeing corpses is like, which is why he doesnt get klaus’ addiction (and to be fair, neither do the rest of his siblings). Same with Vanya. He doesn’t think about what it’s like to learn you have powers after being told you’re horribly boring and average your whole life, nor what it’s like to find out your memory was erased. he had it a lot easier than his siblings, but he doesnt think about that. that leads to some poor decisions and awful seeming actions, but keep in mind that we know a lot more than he does about his siblings. we’ve seen their pain but he hasnt. no one in this damn family communicates, so he just doesnt get it. i wish hed stop to think about how other people feel every once in a while, but itd also help if they just straight up said “hey being high keeps the gory corpses out of my field of view, im not a fan of this either” to help him understand. he wasnt taught empathy, but he tries for the most part. honestly, the fact that he turned out that nice considering what he grew up with? kind of incredible

hes not just obsessed with the moon. and to be fair, he has a right to it? i mean i havent stopped talking about this show for 2 months and ive had other things happening in my life. he was alone up there for 4 years. that doesnt give you much conversation material. and also, bringing up the idea that the apocalypse could be caused by the moon makes sense because, yeah, he was sent up there by their dad who knew about the apocalypse (whether luther was aware of that or not). He was up there to look for threats, so its not that odd to consider that the threat he was watching for could have caused the apocalypse...oh speaking of which HE WAS RIGHT ABOUT THE MOON IT DID CAUSE THE APOCALYPSE

i think a lot of people like to ignore the fact that he was also abused. sure, it wasnt to the extent of klaus or vanya but he had a horrible childhood nonetheless which messed him up too. he wasnt taught a lot of the things we take for granted so like i said earlier, the fact that he’s not completely deranged is astonishing

also can we mention the horrible trauma he went through? like lmao monkey man but oh my gosh can you imagine? he almost died (in a horribly painful way) and woke up months later with a fucking gorilla body. he’ll never look like a normal person again. he probably will never be able to look in the mirror and like what he sees (you can find out first hand what its like to be me so GATHER ROU-) yes everything Klaus went through was horrible but Luther has lived through some fucked up shit too and i think we like to ignore that because he’s not very likeable

the scene with vanya. it hurts me every time i think about it. HOWEVER. i understand why he did it. do i think he made the right choice? fuck no. but i get why he did what he did. Vanya was extremely dangerous. She caused the apocalypse. she literally killed everyone on earth. these arent things we should brush over. (and yes i love vanya but that’s not what we’re talking about here) she very nearly killed Allison, and he doesn’t know her well enough to know if she’s here to genuinely apologize or finish the job. He just knows he has a responsibility not only to his family, but to the entire world. so he makes a tough decision. it hurts him too, look at his face. he doesnt want to do it but he doesnt think he has any other options.

about dismissing klaus: he has good reason (at least in his head). klaus is intoxicated constantly, and like i mentioned before, he doesnt realize its because of his powers. he just thinks klaus is trying to have a good time, and to be fair, klaus tries to hide his vulnerability (for the most part) so luther wouldnt know any better. in the end when he tells him to be a lookout? justified. the man is heavily suffering from withdrawal (or intoxicated, to luther’s knowledge? i cant remember if luther knows or not or whether he believes him for that matter) which is gonna impact his reaction time, and he doesnt have powers that can help anyway (as far as luther knows). yes, he was trained alongside them and allison is allowed to help despite also lacking usable powers; however, she is in a clearer state of mind and a lot healthier. She can physically fight. Klaus just kinda...jumps on people’s backs for the most part. Did you see her fight Cha Cha? *swoons* no but seriously, Allison is still highly skilled and in far better shape than Klaus. He’s a liability and staying outside is safer for everyone (again, as far as luther knows) all this being said, the way he treats klaus when hes drunk is Disgusting, Abhorrent, and Unacceptable. i understand that he doesnt realise his own power but thats inexcusable

luther x allison is gross, i agree HOWEVER they were not raised as adopted siblings, they were raised more closely akin to a boarding school. their dynamic had always been romantic; they never saw themselves as siblings. yes, i do find it very odd that literally everyone else considers each other siblings, but im just saying that their dynamic has always been different and technically it’s not really incestuous (im not condoning it, i hate it personally i just can see why its not the worst thing ever? its still pretty yikes though. also shipping literally any other characters IS fucking gross because the rest of them see each other as siblings and always have so gtfo with klaus x diego or klaus x ben g r o s s)

those are the main complaints ive seen (and voiced myself)... basically it all boils down to the facts that 1. he was abused, just like his siblings 2. he doesnt stop to think about how other people are thinking or feeling 3. hes just trying to do what is best for his family (and the world). I sympathize with monkey man. He deserved better. I really hope in the next season he’ll pause to consider things every once in a while (and that klaus will open up because he’s not useless but he’s not explaining to anyone why he does the things he does and he needs to!!) so yeah was this basically just me yelling at me from a week ago? yes. does anyone care? probably not but i felt it had to be done. anyway im done ranting for now....if i missed anything lemme know

#luther hargreeves #tua #umbrella academy #casey talks #analysis #if i need to clarify smth plz tell me #if youve got other qualms with luther i can try to explain his thought process #i just understand the man so much better now #also fricc you carina and jayden here this is what i mean #i try so dang hard to be open minded and sympathetic so i was real mad at myself for not giving luther a chance #hey #judging people without thinking about why they act the way they do?#yall are actually just luther XD

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deadmanzp · 4 years

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aftg asks; questions by triquetrine

these are so interesting so i did all of them.. i want to come back after a year and see if id still answer the same!

op is the post before this or also tagged “misc”

neil josten: favorite/most iconic line?

first one that comes to mind I’m not sure is a favorite or iconic line? but it’s a line i think about a lot and it always hurts to read. it’s when they're at the cabin in TKM.

“He didn’t care how much it hurt so long as he could pull Andrew closer, and he let Andrew take him apart until he couldn’t think anymore.”

that comes at the very end of Chapter 14 and gosh just the paragraph that line comes from and the paragraph before…. the fact neil thinks andrew doesnt care about him the way he cares/feels about andrew is like….. CMON MAN but also i just love the pining angst of it. i like this line especially because the line right before it mentions neil working his “bandaged fingers into Andrew’s hair”. so the “he didnt care how much it hurt” to me always carried a double meaning of 1. the physical pain he felt bc of his injuries but also 2. the pain of unfamiliarity abt his feelings towards andrew and thinking it was unreciprocal AND THAT HED HAVE TO “WARN” ANDREW like the implication.. of neil thinking abt their “relationship” possibly ending bc andrew doesnt feel the same and maybe wouldnt want to be entangled in whatever neil was feeling …… IM LIKE neil knows andrew so well and him being so sure abt this but hes like …. WRONG …. e

nathaniel wesninski: one thing you would change about the books? (plot, characters, etc)

there is very little id change about the books if at all. mainly bc while i know there are upsetting things that happen/the charas do, i think all of those things make the series really interesting to analyze and talk about. i will say a moment i hated was when neil touches andrews scars when andrew makes it clear he doesn't want neil to pry about them. i know neil offers his scars in turn when he's trying to convince andrew to let neil look over kevin but that was controlled. he let andrew touch them and find out about them of his own volition. neil touches something directly related to the trauma andrew had just experienced again when he had 0 permission to do so. while i always get mad at neil for this when i read it i still dont think id change it or get rid of it. im not really sure how id change it anyways and i think andrews relationship with his scars (and himself in general) is probably what allows him to brush it off(?)/never bring this up (plus maybe neil offering his scars was enough for andrew) but i havent thought too hard about this. but ya i remember i got rlly angry w neil the first time i read this scene and i still get mad abt it when i reread.

andrew minyard: if you could be friends with one of the characters, who would you pick?

i mean realistically i wouldnt be friends w jocks ILL BE REAL LOL and i think as much as i love the monsters, theres no way id be friends w them haha uhm but prob dan would be most realistic! maybe even katelyn tbh..

kevin day: if you played exy, what would your position be?

oh i think dealer! in sports i liked being able to do both defense and offense bc it made me feel i had more control over the field, like i could always do something if there were any holes

dan wilds: favorite moment/scene?

definitely the hotel reunion scene. theres so much to it; it drives me nuts!!!!! but honestly there are probably a lot of really good moments im forgetting. to me the whole series is really enjoyable and every scene has something i could say about it haha

matt boyd: song you would love to see in a live-action adaptation?

Oggghh this is so hard… esp since it takes place in 2007???? Idk.. iconic artists then i suppose ghfgkjhf BUT i think general vibes i think itd be so cool if paramore (time relevant), ptv (also time relevant), and mitski were on the soundtrack……. Ya……..

nicky hemmick: which made you more emotional, neil at evermore or neil in baltimore?

neil in baltimore for sure… neil at evermore i can't remember what i felt the first time i read it (maybe pain LOL bc he was doing it for andrew and i felt like riko wouldnt keep his promise) but in my latest reread i was unimpressed by it (mostly bc i think riko is boring and unimpressive). i think i mightve said evermore in the past though….. maybe... neil in baltimore is like … GOD neils emotions are so strong during all of that its really juicy haha. i think like him being angry bc he was on the cusp of having everything he couldve ever dreamed of; the desperation of wanting to fight back and get away; even just the fear of being in the same room as his father for the first time in so long... all really juicy

aaron minyard: a character you will defend to your death?

defend…. im not sure is the word i would use and i dont think i really believe in defending any of these charas “to death” bc of how flawed and complex they are; id like to acknowledge when they did wrong. i think id “defend” any of the characters if i saw anyone misinterpreting or misunderstanding them.. theyre all really interesting even if they didnt get too much spotlight. except maybe riko. hes incredibly boring to me. and also nathan ig and any of his crew just bc there is Nothing abt them rlly...

katelyn: which minor character do you wish you could see more of?

uhhhmmmmmmmm hmmmmmm….. idk maybe… jeremy…. gjfjgkdngmdghs just bc him and kevin r so funny.. i was thinking maybe jean too but…… idk a diff kind of kevin relationship lol (yikes) (pain) but really im satisfied w jeans screen time. i think ichirou is interesting but again i think he didn't rlly need more. maybe erik actually. im interested to know what nicky is like with him :0

allison reynolds: favorite headcanon about the foxes?

actually something i recently thought abt was neil and photography. iirc? andrew gives neil a camera in the ec and i also imagine kevin eventually gets another camera too (i loved that detail when we saw his room at the nest) so i thought abt neil and kevin sharing/trading pics they take of (mainly) scenery. i imagine neil takes pics of anything he wants to remember/keep while kevin is more prone to taking pics of subjects related to some nerd history stuff (lol) so thats why they trade scenery pics mainly. but i like this small connection bc i want more to their relationship than their exy obsession and i imagine they have room for more now that riko is gone and i just like this other commonality btwn them. i think maybe they mail the developed pics to each other maybe w small descripts/notes but thats it. and i also imagine it kind of just is something that started happening.. neil and andrew r on a roadtrip and some building reminds neil of kevin so he snaps a pic and eventually sends it to kevin w some note. kevin replies 1. either a text being like that is nothing. > neil: shrugs brushes it off but figures he is welcome to send more when kevin sends his own picture back or 2. kevin simply replies back similarly w his own photo. i dont know.. maybe this goes beyond what their actual relationship would be like but i do like the idea of them just bein like… dude friends u know so i want them to have more than just exy and a traumatizing experience between them.

as for common headcanons within the fanbase…. i do like the allison + neil haircuts thing.. although im not sure if i imagine it the same as most haha i feel neil would know how to cut his own hair from his life on the run (though theyre not Good or bad just like ok u know like passable generic w/e) i think hed definitely be tense the first couple times but he has experience w allison being close from needing to be covered up w make up after winter break so i think she would be allowed.

renee walker: favorite non-canonical ship? (renison, jerejean, etc)

uhmm to be honest none really… im way too attached to canon to be able to dismiss any established relationships. i think kevemy (??? is that the name) is rlly amusing but i dont want them together necessarily haha i used to rlly like renison mainly bc im a lesbian and i want “main” chara wlw relationships lol but i recently read something abt how bi allison doesnt rlly sit well w some bc she outs andrew and neil during the hotel scene.. i also agree this is kinda :/ if she was bi Mainly bc i feel a lot of ppl (or at least this is what i gather from renison stuff ive seen) portray allison already being established bi? if this makes sense. i think if renison/allison realizing shes bi is a later development id feel better abt it but usually renison is already established so ya her outing them does bother me…. BUT aside from this, thinking about them as characters and what their partners (would) look like… im not sure if theyd rlly choose each other.. but i still enjoy seeing them together in art and in fic bc in the end…. im a sucker for women lol….

seth gordon: most underrated dynamic? (matt & neil, wymack & andrew, etc)

my first thought was wymack and andrew bc i rlllllyy like their dynamic especially after reading their ec stuff. i loved their first meeting (andrews terrible sandwich??!?fhdhfjd) and when andrew breaks into wymacks apartment BUT i think ppl mention them enough its not underrated. i Actually think renee and andrews dynamic/friendship is rlly underrated/overlooked!!! especially after reading the son nefes ec i love their dynamic a lot…

some son nefes moments of them i liked: tw // rape

renee convincing andrew to go with her to see matt after his trip to edens

how many knives do u carry / one more than u IS SO FUNNY and just andrews persistence abt fighting renee is also rlly funny to me

tw // rape : the moment when andrew asks renee if she killed her rapist/abuser that whole convo was good…

their convo in the rain w their tea

i cant remember when this happens or rlly exaclty what was said but renee offers andrew something (some help??) and he says i dont need (w/e it was) and she says something along the lines of i know but it wouldnt do any harm or SOMETHING like that.. i like this bc she acknowledges their abilities while showing shed still like to offer some help. im p sure she does this another time too (w neil???? or someone i cant remember maybe it was andrew again) and i remember liking it too. she has a way w words and talking (also seen in her convincing andrew to see matt)

BUT regardless of ec stuff i think their relationship/dynamic seen in the books is rlly good too. theres def enough to be intrigued by them and i always have been? so i'm reeeaallly happy son nefes exists i loved reading it..

david wymack: which ncaa team would you play for?

oh to be honest i dont rlly remember many of them but of the Three (ravens, foxes, trojans) prob trojans. i remember i even got them in a uquiz once…

abby winfield: which character was the most realistically written?

first that came to mind was aaron actually.. i remember before when i didnt rlly like him or care abt him it was actually bc he was too “boring” to me. i always thought he had the most realistic reactions to things which is what made him boring to me amidst the ridiculousness of, well, everything in aftg lol… i still think he is really realistically written but now i dont think hes boring haha

besty dobson: how many times have you read the series?

fully i think…. only 3 times… i wish this were a higher count but i actually feel guilty everytime i try to reread it.

riko moriyama: coolest exy moment? (kevin’s last-minute point against the ravens, andrew shutting down the goal, etc)

uhhmm uhmm i def think kevin during the final game against the ravens…. hes so cool haha but i KNOW there were a lot of game moments that i thought were really cool so i cant rlly say…. oh also i love neil being defense in that game too rlly juicy wish i could pull up obscure moments bc i know i rlly enjoyed reading the games but terrible memory...

jeremy knox: which do you like reading more, domestic!foxes or chaotic!foxes?

uh i guess chaotic? not rlly sure exactly what that could entail but i do like… their chaos.. when they have fights and squabbles and stuff… this includes the high tension moments. ALTHOUGH i do like the tiny lines in the books when we see the monsters just doing like random basic everyday life stuff like playing video games or whatever. i like…. imagining them... fhdjfjshfjs… as for fic def chaos. i feel domestic is usually too softened…..

jean moreau: favorite friendship?

oh i think this goes back to andrew and renee. but other than them… i do like neil and matts friendship.. though probably not the same as its typically portrayed

#my own #misc

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h-200-decloth · 5 years

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This one time i almost got kidnapped. u/ForgottenLiquidSmoke This is long and im sorrybout that. BUT, all of this happened to me and i remember it like vivid as hell. It ends well. And i dont drink in public because of this. Im also not their friend anymore as they judged me, but they are alive to do so and that is good. This happened about 6 or 7 years ago back then I was young, hot and stupid and an un-admitted alchy. But everyone i worked with in travel drank every time they were off work. So i was in california on business and i had gone out with 2 coworkers and we were smashed but coherent enough to check out we left. Though we needed assistance to get a cab. The sushi place ordered us one. Someone tipped them and all three of us sloshed in the taxi. I had drank since was 17 so my tolerance and drunk awareness was honed. My friends nodded off in the taxi. Drunk. Lights out. I was trying to stay awake as the designated directory because this guy “barely knew english” but lil short spoke fluently and gave him address and directions. And said we would tip him well when we got there safe or something like that as she laughed. We were drunk girls staying in le mesa but kinda near tijuana, I guess (important) even though he had gps he was “avoiding” the highway. I also had my gps up, it was a drunk girl safty measure I learned somewhere. I noticed it kept rerouting and searching via my gps. Now I know. Now I know that (he knew where he was intending go was not where we ordered) but back then me listened to him say detour and traffic and short cuts. With a 20 min drive from food to the hotel turned into like a 2 hour drive by 1.5 hours drunk me was having trouble maintaining consciousness, and telling him wrong turn via my maps gps. I had drank so much, he would get us there I prayed. He turned on the heat too. It was warm and id roll asleep but jerk awake. My drunk mind wanted the sleep my friends had lulled into. But my fight or flight said wake up b*tch!! He got a call and I nodded off to the ringer song he had that was trendy back then. It was some American country song I knew too. Though that didn’t clue me in. I awoke to him saying in clear english that like scared me to my bone. Not because he was innocently bilingual. But, because he seemed shy and acted as though he only spoke spanish when we got in his taxi. So him speaking english made me wake up but not cue him in. As fight mode brain needed to clear the drunk fog and make a plan. I observed my surroundings without alerting him. So i became squinty eyed and listened like a hawk!!! He said in english after acting like “no english, piqueno” “”YEAH I KNOW. IT TOOK(looked back) it took a while for the one girl to fall asleep, she had gps talked to bf on phone or faked it, her phone died. all drunk yeah, potato sacks, ones a two manner. The other two are shoulder bitches” Silence (other person talking maybe). Driver again “2 minutes maybe 10 theres a cop and lights and a wreck ahead here. (Quite other person maybe) “NO, NO, NO, IM AT A RED LIGHT! YEAH, YEAH… WELL IM A TAXI. NO, NO THEY ARE DISTRACTED, ACCIDENT okay shit” and some mumbles and a flip phone snap. Well I saw blue lights and then the cop car. It was there like magic. Drunk brain Safety magic. I saw the red street light and drunk brain decided; make scene get cops!!!! SOOO I started gagging like i was gonna throw up. I wanted the driver distracted. And i kind of did a throwup mouthful on the center console and on his baggy shirt. Which was a feat for me, from the right side of the back seat since i had to push my friends off me to do it. But I grabbed the door handle and lock and jiggled and tug but they wouldnt budge and it wouldnt open. I started screaming “ima throw up more, open this” and my friends were awakened and in a drunken stuper like "hold it its a short drive we are almost there” as they were passed out and had no clue of the two hour reroutes even after i woke em up. one brushed my spittle splash of throwup and started throwing up in the same spot and she had eaten and drank alot (the larger girl) now we were all gagging from the smell for real including the driver. The light we had sat at had turned green and we were about to pass the cops and he the taxi driver in english mumbled hed “charge us extra to clean it, an arm and a leg.” And he laughed I started banging on the window cus he wouldnt let me out and a cop was directing traffic around whatever accident. The cop who thankfully saw us beckoned us stop and got other cop attention. There were a few cop cars because whatever accident near the border i guess. It was the tijuana border as i saw an orange diamond sign that said that city name tijuana and border detour. And there was an accident with cops tending it. Under and underpass and driver was mumbling only road or whatever. So a cop stood in front of his car directing traffic where to go but had stopped us and one right next to the passenger side,directing traffic very slow, he was standing in traffic he was almost against my window on the passanger side, a cop showing people how to avoid accident rubble and the cars. I turned into an animal looked straight at the cop banged on the window with my almost dead phone and my hand, pried at the door knob and looked terrified in hopes he would stop this taxi. Luckily the cop in front and the cop on side somehow communicated and i heard tire spins. Not us. A fast acting cop pulled in front of him. They made him pull over into parking lot and I’m screaming get me out and my friends are like calm down we are drunk and police but i wanted out police were safer than whatever his phone conversation was about and an officer was talking to him and he “didnt speak english again and needed a translator” and i only know that cuz the cop said it would take a while to get a translator was he sure and that i needed to settle down. And the guy must have said hed wait but the cops were busy and discussing lettin him take us home… I wanted to get the cop mad so i said NOOOO. So now i started screaming “hes a kidnapper get a promotion get me out of here” and just going bonkers because we were covered in vomit the police had been trying to talk over me for a few minutes with this guy who “ didnt know english” and i said “he fucken knows enlish and speaks it!!!” And they said something like settle down we are busy that they didnt want to book me for being a silly drunk girl. Some pussy card bullshit. So i freaked and said “no no fuck it arrest me.” My friends were now angry and worried but i wanted safety even if my record was shit. I didnt want to be potatoes. So they again tried to calm me and said they were gonna let him go drop us off. So i left the door alone and started hitting him! I was hoping violent smacked would make the cops question our situation we were stuck in. I screamed i was violent and going to off him…drunk and illogical or not who cares. More cops had now circled the taxi to watch and more cop cars kind of circled us. and I started crying and my friends were now fading against the other door and crying too and judging me. and I kept slapping him in the head and he screamed in pure clean english “BITCH!!! YOU’RE DEAD. hit me one more time your dead. your dead.” Then everything went fast cops pulled guns and made him unlock us. I jumped out throwing my heels first. We got out and i hugged the cop that was originally next to my window he seemed scared of me. But i hugged the shit out of him and cried. My friends stood there awkward. He finally hugged me back and petted my hair. The cops decided to take us to the hotel and were gona have me/us file a report the next day but said it might not be needed because so many cops saw. I wasnt asked to write a statement or to show up anywhere. I was just asked to sign a mostly blank paper stating he was a kidnapper and had a long phone call i told them about. Also my friends signed a completely blank statement paper. We never saw tickets or charges on our names and we never even wrote our names aside from cursive sinage. I never heard from the cops but that guy was fighting the cops when we left His taxi. And the cops used a shock gun/tazer thing cuz he pushed someone and tried to run. And he was saying weird shit in english!! Which was funny because he had first made them think he needed a translator because he ‘knew’ no english. BUT we were safe!!!! My former coworkers were safe. To the cali taxi driver and your flip phone friend lets not meet ever ever again. https://www.reddit.com/r/LetsNotMeet/comments/a07n8e/this_one_time_i_almost_got_kidnapped/

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rikirachtman · 7 years

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Chapters 5-8 of My Immortal, but it’s Dave Mustaine instead (an ongoing series)

Chapter 5.

AN: STOP flaming! if u flam it menz ur a posr or a metalica fan (same thing rly)! Da only reson Larz swor is coz he had a hedache ok an on tup of dat he wuz mad at dem 4 having sexx! PS im nut updating umtil I get five good revoiws!

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Larz made and Jamz and I follow him. He kept shouting at us angrily.

“You ludacris focks!” he shouted.

I started to cry tears of blood down my face. Jaimus comforted me. When we went back to the castle Lorz took us to Kork and Cloff who were both looking very angry.

“They were having sexual intercourse in the Forbidden Garage!” he yelled in a furious voice.

“Why did you do such a thing, you mediocre dunces?” asked Clif.

“How dare you?” demanded Krik.

And then Jamz shrieked. “BECAUSE I LOVE HIM!”

Everyone was quiet. Larz and Clif still looked mad but Kerk said. “Fine. Very well. You may go up to your rooms.”

Jamz and I went upstairs while the posers glared at us.

“Are you okay, Dav?” Jarms asked me gently.

“Yeah I guess.” I lied. I went to the boy's dorm and brushed my teeth and my hair and changed into a Vic Ratlhed cosplaye. When I came out….

Jaimz was standing in front of the bathroom, and he started to sing ‘am i evel' by Dymond Hed. I was so flattered, even though he wasn’t supposed to be there. We hugged and kissed. After that, we said goodnight and he reluctantly went back into his room.

Chapter 6.

AN: shjt up pozrs ok! PS I wnot update ubtil u give me goood revows!

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The next day I woke up in my bible coffin. I put on nothign dis time bc fuk clothez

In the Great Hall, I ate some Dethio's cereal with pozr blood instead of milk, and a glass of holy watr. Suddenly someone bumped into me. All the holy watre spilled over my naked chest.

“Bastard!” I shouted angrily. I regretted saying it when I looked up cause I was looking into the face of an alien boy wiff curly hair and a big butte-chin. He looked exactly like Weerd Al. He was so sexy that my body went all hot when I saw him kind of like an erection (which i got btw).

“I’m so sorry.” he said in a shy voice.

“That’s all right. What’s your name?” I questioned.

“My name’s Martie Fredman, although most people call me Marty-San-Chan-Senpai-Desu these days.” he grumbled.

“Why?” I exclaimed.

“Because I love anime.” he giggled.

“Well, I am a weeaboo.” I confessed.

“Really?” he whimpered.

“Yeah.” I roared.

We sat down to talk for a while. Then Jamz came up behind me and told me he had a surprise for me so I went away with him.

Chapter 7. ratl ur godamn hed

AN: wel ok u guyz im only writting dis cuz I got 5 god reviuws. n BTW I wont rite da nxt chapter til I git TIN god vons! STO FLAMING OR ILL REPORT U! Dav isn’t a Marie Sue ok he isn’t perfect HES A CHIRSTIAN! n he has problemz hes angery 4 godz sake!

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J4m3s and I held our sunburnt orange hands as we went upstairs. I was wearing red Vic Ratlhed earings (AN: c doez dat sound lik a Maru Sue 2 u?). I waved to Marty-Chan. Genki was in his kawaii eyes. I guess he was jealous of me that I was going out with Jmz. Anyway, I went upstairs excitedly with Games. We went into his room and locked the door. Then…………

We started frenching passively and we took off each others clothes enthusiastically. He felt me up before I took of my top. Then I took off my mom jeanz and he took off his leather pants. We went on the bed and started making out naked and then he put his boy’s thingy in mine and we HAD SEX. (c is dat stupid?)

“Oh Jemz, J00ms!” I screamed while getting an orgasm when all of a sudden I saw a tattoo I had never seen before on Germ's arm. It was a heart with a anime girl on it. On it in kawaii japanese words were the words........... Martye-San!

I was so angry.

“You bastard!” I shouted angrily, jumping out of the bed.

“No! No! But you don’t understand!” Jeff pleaded. But I knew too much.

“No, you fucking idiot!” I shouted. “You probably have AIDs anyway!”

I put on my clothes all huffily and then stomped out. Jim ran out even though he was naked. He had a really big you-know-what but I was too mad to care. I stomped out and did so until I was in Marty-Senpai's classroom where he was having a lesson with Profesor Steve Vai and some other people.

“MARTE FELDMAN, YOU MOTHERFUCKER!” I yelled.

Chapter 8.

AN: stop flassing ok! if u do den u r a posr and a liberal!

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Everyone in the class stared at me and then Jemfmzfzmzkfz came into the room even though he was naked and started begging me to take him back.

“Dav, it’s not what you think!” JKmkamzkmfz screamed sadly.

My friend Daved Junor Elfson smiled at me understatedly. he flipped his long sholder-length metal sandy hair and opened his crimson eyes like blood because he was wearing contact lenses on. he had white skin. He was kidnapped when he was born. His real parents are Starbucks drinkers but Dunkin Donuts fans killed his mother and his father committed suicide because he was depressed about it. He still has nightmares about it and he is very haunted and depressed. It also turns out his real last name is Elefson and not Junor. (Since he has converted to Christianism he is in Megadef not Mretalica. )

“What is it that you desire, you puss fag slut!” Clif demeaned angrily in his cold voice but I ignored him.

“Marty Friedchicken, I can’t believe you cheated on me with Jamz Hetfold!!” I shouted at him.

Everyone gasped.

I don’t know why Dav was so mad at me. I had went out with Marty-san (I’m bi and so is Dav) for a while but then he broke my heart. He dumped me because he liked Babymetal. We were just good friends now. He had gone through horrible problems, and now he was metl. (Haha, like I would hang out with a j-pop poser.)

“But I’m not going out with Jamz anymore!” said Martorious.

“Yeah fucking right! Fuck off, you bastard!” I screamed. I ran out of the room and into the Forbidden Garage where I had lost my virility to Joms and then I started to bust into tears.

(I haven’t been planning ahead in regards to how I’m going to adapt this story to the Deth/Tallica narrative, so certain character matchups (like Lars and Dumbledore, for example) are going to rapidly get more nonsensical and convoluted as this goes on)

#dav immortal

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